# Student's rights re: pregnancy & graduation?



## aisling (Apr 26, 2004)

Disclaimer: Mods, I have no idea where this should go, so I thought I would try here. Please move it if you need to. Thank you!

This is a situation that is occuring in my local school district. The instant I heard about it I was outraged and I am wondering what you all think and/or know. Any thougths and/or suggestions would be apprectiated. Here are the details as far as I know them:

An 18 year-old senior student is pregnant. Graduation is June 9th and the young woman's "due date" is the 13th. The school is asking her mother (who works full-time, out of the home out of neccessity) to "home-school her for the last few weeks"!!







:

The mother has talked to the principal several times to try and get some specific information about what exactly her daughter needs to do in order to graduate and she is getting no where. Road bocks everywhere. Basically, they want her out. They don't want a pregnant girl lumbering around the school. WTF - Is it 1953?!?!?!?! Why don't we just send her to the convent and tell her friends she is "visiting family out of state"!

This is making me sick. WHAT CAN I DO?! Surely this 18 year old has some rights to finish her education! Can a public school just kick her out for being pregnant?!

HELP!


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## angelpie545 (Feb 23, 2005)

Speaking from a ex-pregnant teenager's prospective, that is outrageous. No they cannot deny her the right to graduate based on her pregnancy. No they cannot force her to leave the school. That would be pregnancy discrimination. That mother needs to go into that principal's office and tell them where they can shove it. They cannot legally deny her daughter the right to an education based on her pregnancy. If I where that mother, I would just continue to send my duaghter to school, and send her to the graduation ceremony. They may have a fight ahead of them, but ultimately they will win if it is a public school.


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## coopnwhitsmommy (Jan 13, 2005)

In 1980 My Older Sister watched our Mom walk to get her hs diploma...it's outrageous to force a girl out because she is pg. perhaps there is another issue? Maybe they don't want to get stuck with a girl in labor on their hands...god forbid anything happen and the school found liable...


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## lotusdebi (Aug 29, 2002)

I graduated 10 years ago, but this kind of thing was happening at my school back then.
Pregnant teens were "encouraged" to go elsewhere once they started really showing.
Not all of them did. They couldn't be forced to leave.

Basically, the schools don't want the pregnant teens to "influence" other teens to get pregnant.


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## Greaseball (Feb 1, 2002)

If the school is a public school or any other school receiving federal funds, pregnant girls cannot be denied education; graduation; recommendations or nominations; membership in clubs or teams; or anything else UNLESS these things are also denied to teen FATHERS!

Check out this thread and its link for more info:
http://www.mothering.com/discussions...nant+parenting


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## aisling (Apr 26, 2004)

Greaseball! Thank you! In my fired up haste, I didn't even think to do a search. This site is great and there is a link on to an awesome document outlining Title IX. I'm printing it off right now and I am literally going to drive over to the mom and get it in her hands as soon as it is done printing.

The thing that pisses me off is that this is a family that could be easily railroaded and it SUCKS!

Its ironic: my husband is running for school board right now (primary on Tuesday!) because of _just this sort of thing!_ And you know, now their gonna piss of the other Reeher!? NOT SMART!!!!

Thanks again!


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## chersolly (Aug 29, 2004)

Poor young woman. Not only does she have to deal with the stressors of being a young, new mother, she has to have to deal with pompous political crap. I hope she is able to walk on that stage and receive her diploma like everyone else. She has earned it.


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## ~Jenna~ (Dec 7, 2003)

That sucks for her. I was pregnant when I graduated high school - I guess I was lucky no one said anything to me.


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## Irishmommy (Nov 19, 2001)

Actually, I hope she has the baby early, and gets her diploma while carrying the baby in a sling and nursing.


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## boricuaqueen327 (Oct 11, 2004)

ARGH! I was pregnant my senior year and had a due date 2 weeks before gradutaion. I was never told to leave the school or to be "homeschooled". I did finish the semester at home with a tutor but ONLY because I was put on strict bed rest. She really needs to speak to a lawyer who can tell her her rights and what she can do to stay in school. Telling her to "homeschool" for the last few weeks is outrageous!


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## boricuaqueen327 (Oct 11, 2004)

Also, if it's a public school, they can not force her not to go to school, it would be illegal. Others have given great info so I wont' repeat it. But ooooh does this make me mad..... I remember being this upset when my friend overheard a teacher saying that all pregnant teens should go to a special school becuase we were wasting our time in regular school since we were not going to go to college anyway.







:


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## applejuice (Oct 8, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *angelpie545*
That would be pregnancy discrimination.

Actually, it is sex discrimination.


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## aisling (Apr 26, 2004)

You guys rock! I am so thankful for a place where people will be as mad about it as I am!

I took the mom some very specific information about the law (Title IX) and her daughter's rights. We looked over it for a few minutes together - long enough that I was sure she understood pretty well and so that I was _positive_ that she understands, at the very least, that they can NOT make her leave. I also let her know that she can call me if she needs more help and I will be happy to whatever I can.

She seemed really thankful. She also said that she's going to call tomorrow and shock them by knowing what the hell she's talking about this time! :LOL

Irishmommy - I'd love to see her slingin' that baby on stage too!









thanks again!


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## aisling (Apr 26, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *boricuaqueen327*
I remember being this upset when my friend overheard a teacher saying that all pregnant teens should go to a special school becuase we were wasting our time in regular school since we were not going to go to college anyway.







:

uke

Why are people SO closed minded!?


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## applejuice (Oct 8, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *coopnwhitsmommy*
Maybe they don't want to get stuck with a girl in labor on their hands...god forbid anything happen and the school found liable...









Yes, I think this crazy thing has persisted because of liability. I graduated in 1972 and one of my friends was pregnant. She graduated with us, but I can recall her in physical education class jumping on the trampoline for fun; this was not a required activity.

Huge Liability, otherwise, I do not think the schools would care. The administration is only looking out for itself.


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## tboroson (Nov 19, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *boricuaqueen327*
I remember being this upset when my friend overheard a teacher saying that all pregnant teens should go to a special school becuase we were wasting our time in regular school since we were not going to go to college anyway.







:

*snort* oh, yeah, because everybody else who goes to that high school is college bound, huh? Or maybe they should pigeonhole everybody by demographics - send all the kids who's parents live in trailer parks to special schools because they won't go to college anyway... and kids who are black... and kids who have been caught smoking pot...

Yeah, mamas who get pregnant in high school deserve a lesser education because they're not headed to college, huh?







idiots


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## littleaugustbaby (Jun 27, 2003)

Yikes, that makes me sick!

I went to a small, conservative, Catholic high school, and one of the girls in my class was about 6 months pregnant when we graduated, and the school had no problem with letting her participate in everything, including graduation. There was also a girl in my 8th grade class (at yet another small, conservative, Catholic school) who was pregnant, and the school allowed her to stay.

It's really frightening when the private (read: Christian) schools are more lenient than the public schools. WTF?


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## AllyRae (Dec 10, 2003)

How awful!!







That poor girl did exactly what people would have criticized her for not doing...she finished her education. She didn't drop out because she was pregnant...she finished high school despite morning sickness, pregnancy discomforts, and all of the teasing, etc. that would have gone along with it. To have graduation taken from her is just awful.







The girl should be an inspiration--she FINISHED school while pregnant!

And how dare they think she wouldn't go to college... My mom finished her associate's degree with 4 kids under the age of 5...and then finished her bachelor's degree after *6* kids! My mom had me shortly after she graduated high school. Why do people automatically assume just because you have a child, you can't go on to school? I started grad school while pregnant with my first (and graduated during this pregnancy), and my sister just started college and she has a 1 year old!


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## Greaseball (Feb 1, 2002)

About liability - the Title IX rules say that pregnant students cannot be required to get a doctor's note to be in sports, unless that is what is required of all students. If pregnant students can play sports, I don't see why they can't walk up on stage and graduate.


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## alegna (Jan 14, 2003)

So sad this is happening in this day and age. When I was in HS we had assorted girls pregnant through the years with no problems. There's even a picture in one of my yearbooks of a pregnant twirler (twirling at a game, in uniform which was a sparkly leotard)









and fwiw I've been out of high school better than 10 years....

-Angela


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

Oh my gosh, Meg, I thought this was about GCC!
My college roomie got pregnant our senior year and had to hide it so she wouldn't get kicked out.
I am glad you are helping to advocate for this mama-to-be.


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## aisling (Apr 26, 2004)

Annette...You know, I went to Messiah College and this issue was one of the few things I didn't agree on. It would have been the same way at Messiah for an unmarried student.

I'm really glad I am getting the opportunity to help this family as well. I'm a bit notorious amongst those who know me for being a "know-it-all" when it comes to pregnancy, birth, etc. But its just because I am passionate about it. Why do I have to have kids to be passionate about all things mothering?

I feel like this is my chance to do something really real with that passion!









I will get in touch with the mom again in a couple of days to see how things are going. If she needs soemthing more from me, I'll be ready to give it!


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## Medusa (Mar 25, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *aisling*
I will get in touch with the mom again in a couple of days to see how things are going. If she needs soemthing more from me, I'll be ready to give it!


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## MamaHippo (Dec 4, 2004)

My sis was a teen mom. She was 15 when she had to drop out of public school to be homeschooled. The admin didnt 'make' her leave, but she was getting daily threats from some of the other kids at the school - notes and whispers of "Watch your back, we're going to push you down the stairs" and "I've got a coat hanger you can use".. things like that. One guy even pinned her up against a locker and called her horrid names. she was scared to death. The admin refused to do anything about the threats and instead advised her to either have an abortion or drop out. There were 11 pregnant girls that year - 9 had abortions, one miscarried and my sis was the only one who had her baby.
Yet, at the same school 2 years earlier, my graduating class had a girl who was 8 mo preg walking across to get her diploma. So, I dont think there is really a standard plan for dealing with pregnant girls, i think its up to the administration. I think what is happening to the girl posted about is abhorrent. She deserves an education as much as anyone else. And i agree, not letting the mama graduate while the dad has no repercussions at all is a terrible double standard.
I graduated from a public school, but for a few years i was at a private christian school. A girl in the class above me got pregnant, and the principal got up during an assembly and ANNOUNCED it to the student body, without the girl's permission. And she was sitting in front of me during this assembly, and was crying and sooooo humiliated. She too was about to graduate. She was allowed to graduate but not to walk across the stage to get her diploma. So not all private christian schools are lenient...

Kudos to you, aisling, for getting involved to help this mama.
















Lisa


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## Lyndsay2_4 (May 9, 2005)

I was a teen mom. I was 16yr and a junior in high school when I got preggo with dd1. i was the 3 girl that year to be preggo. 2 of them were seniors. Neither one of them were forced out of school. I wasnt forced out, but I had teachers that called me a slut, whore, told me I needed to have an abortion or give "it" up for adoption. And my classmates (except for 1) talked about hitting me, i was a whore, etc bc i was a pregnant high school junior.







then when my daughter was born (premie) that was the talk of the town/school. how she was premie bc i was uneducated (??? WTF??), bc I didnt take care of myself (not true!), and so forth.

I hate close minded people!









oh and when i was a freshman, our prom queen was 7 months pregnant with TWINS!!


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## boricuaqueen327 (Oct 11, 2004)

Good for you for taking that info to the girl's family and following up on it. You rock!


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## applejuice (Oct 8, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Greaseball*
About liability - the Title IX rules say that pregnant students cannot be required to get a doctor's note to be in sports, unless that is what is required of all students. If pregnant students can play sports, I don't see why they can't walk up on stage and graduate.

What does it say about jumping on a trampoline?

I stand by my liability statement since from reading these posts, it is obvious the schools do not want to throw every pregnant girl out of school, yet, nor do they want to protect a pregnant girl from the tauntings of her peers, such as the threat of being pushed down the stairs, etc.

I think it is an interesting stand for a school to take, but not a good one.


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## MamaTaraX (Oct 5, 2004)

I attneded (part-time) a public high school for a couple of years (mysophmore and junior years). They had so many pregnancies that they made a "parents wing" inthe school. The parents (Daddies included,thankyouverymuch!) went to school like everyuone else but had the benefit of childcare available should they need it. At first I thought it was horrible that theyseparated them from the other kids, until I went over there and saw just how many there were. Then I thought it wasn't a terrilble idea. THey still walked the halls with the other kids, ate lunch with everyone else. They had a shortened school day too so that they could care for their children themselves or go to their jobs if theyhad them.
As for the original post, I hope that girl walks across that stage witha baby in a sling too. See, then she wouldn't be pregnant anymore so no reason to keep her from beingthere







Or maybe she'll go into labor right there andfind her special place in the auditorium singing a beautiful labor song








Namaste,Tara


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## Greaseball (Feb 1, 2002)

About the trampoline - is this an issue at many schools? In today's litigious society, I doubt schools would want any of their students, pregnant or no, on a trampoline.

I just saw that my link no longer works...sorry...I'll try and find the document elsewhere. But it did say that the school has a responsibility to protect pregnant students from harrassment and threats. Of course, they have a responsibility to protect all students from bullying, and they seem to do a crappy job of it.


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## ayme371 (Jan 5, 2005)

They absolutely may not. It is against the law and if they try to push her out LAW SUIT!!!! Something similar happened to my best friend in 1991 at a Catholic school and her parents had the right to sue as well. The school has no right to do this to this girl!!!!


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## aisling (Apr 26, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Greaseball*
I just saw that my link no longer works...

Greaseball...is this the specific link it was:
Our Rights as Pregnant and Parenting Students

Its what I found when I looked around a little on the site that you are linked to.


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## Greaseball (Feb 1, 2002)

From the link:

Quote:

You have the RIGHT to stay in school in your regular class while you are pregnant and after you have your baby. If your school claims that you have to move to a special program, they are violating federal and state law.

Quote:

You have the RIGHT to participate in all school and extracurricular activities like sports, honors societies, or a drama club. Your school cannot single you out to demand a letter from your doctor before letting you participate. If other students don't have to have a note from the doctor to participate in an activity, you don't have to have one either.

Quote:

If your doctor says so, your school must change your gym requirements so it's safe for you during pregnancy.

Quote:

*A teacher must make the classroom a safe and comfortable space for you. A teacher must act to stop harassment and teasing from other students because you are pregnant.You cannot be treated any differently if you decide to have an abortion.*


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## juju's mom (Mar 30, 2005)

That makes me so sad.

Jenn


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## MommyBear (Dec 19, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *boricuaqueen327*
But ooooh does this make me mad..... I remember being this upset when my friend overheard a teacher saying that all pregnant teens should go to a special school becuase we were wasting our time in regular school since we were not going to go to college anyway.







:

I had a friend in high school who got pg during our sophomore year. Other than not being able to sit in the desks there were no changes made. She had her baby, finished school a YEAR EARLY and just this past weekend graduated college and is off to grad school. Yeah, I guess all mommies are stupid









Most of the private Christian schools around here would welcome a pg mama if that meant she was finishing her education. It's sad that public schools, which are so much more lienient on SO many issues, can't say the same.


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## jakesmama (May 9, 2005)

In our school district, the teen parent program is housed at a separate facility to the high school and pg girls are "encouraged" to begin classes at this site asap. When the HS is contacted to see if there are other girls who could use services they always say "no" and then a bit down the road girls trickle in. They are very much into the whole don't-talk-about-the-elephant-in-the-living-room thing. I think it is outrageous that we essentially turn our backs on these mamas instead of educating and encouraging them. Shouldn't our communities be supporting these women to be the best parents possible? I personally know lots of awesome teenaged mamas!!


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## mgmsmommy (Jun 24, 2003)

I think it is great that you are helping them out!

OT: Aisling I also went to Messiah College. Didn't expect to run into anyone else from there here.


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