# Does your family look 'crunchy' or are people surprised?



## frontierpsych (Jun 11, 2006)

Just wondering!

To the outside world, our family would appear 'normal'. My husband works a white-collar job as a contractor, I am looking for work myself (In the meantime I paint and sell my art on Etsy, which I guess is kind of crunchy-looking) But the way we dress, our home (which looks decidedly uncrunchy with all those plastic toys. I'm sure many would notice, though, that my 2 year old doesn't have a bed, because he sleeps with us!), etc. You wouldn't think we were crunchy by looking in our fridge or pantry (we're about middle of the line when it comes to food, somewhere in between "Mac and cheese and cheetos, and soaked grains and kefir)







We are moderately crunchy (co-sleep, no vax, no circ, extended RF, breastfed till 22 months, gentle discipline) but have un-crunchy traits as well (disposable diapers (we used cloth for 18 months then my mom ruined ALL my diapers!







), just cut my son's long locks, use daycare, no babywearing (he hasn't liked it since he learned to walk), weaned before age 2 (I'd have loved to go longer, but we were facing some family problems and had to wean him), stuff like that.

Are you visibly "crunchy"? Do you think people notice when you are out in public, or when they visit your home?


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## Tumble Bumbles (Oct 15, 2009)

I don't think we look at all "crunchy" on the outside. Well, I suppose we kind of do on a couple levels. My dh is a local 'rock star' (a very respected musician in the area) so I guess that's kinda 'crunchy'. Otherwise, not really. We dress pretty casual -- think Old Navy. We're Christian and our home reflects that with various Biblical things around.

To be honest, if someone were to just take a tour of our apartment without us being home, we look a lot like conservative Christian Republicans who play a lot of music









(We're not Republican, we're Independent)

However, we are pretty 'crunchy' in many areas, mostly involving treatment of children and human rights. We are anti-circ, don't vax, don't spank or shame, follow most principles of unconditional parenting. We co-sleep, are pro-BF, I homebirthed (and will again), we unschool. We eat home-cooked, almost all natural (the occasional 'junk' can be found too), we recylce, I grow some food herbs on the patio -- we used sposies which is not crunchy (no w/d when dd was little) but we use cloth everything else except TP... I wore dd when she was into it...

So, when you get to know us you'd find us pretty 'crunchy' but on the surface you probably wouldn't know it.

I'm at the point where I don't care. I used to, but I've come to know that it truly is what's inside that matters. I've met the most hippy-lookin', crunchy, hemp-wearin', dreadlock havin' people who treat their kids terrible and lived very 'mainstream'







but look very much 'the part'.


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## Youngfrankenstein (Jun 3, 2009)

Somehow I've always felt that living in a big-old housing development made us lose credibility in the crunchy department.

Of course it did allow us to have a great birth suite with private bathroom and a whole lotta babymoon. It was my "birth cave"!









ETA: I love how you put "think you're normal" Cause APs not normal! HAHA!


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## goldingoddess (Jan 5, 2008)

I'm pretty sure we look 'crunchy,' and our house looks crunchy.

There are no paper products in our house other than toilet paper. All of our cleaning products are green. We don't have a TV. Every piece of art in my house has naked women in it.

We drive a compact car and share it between us because of our environmental consciousness. My husband has long hair down to his butt and gauged ears. I have hairy armpits and don't wear make-up. But on the other hand, DH is very high up in his company and definitely has a very professional appearance there, but we're in the bay area, so 'looks' are relative because long hair is definitely acceptable in the computer programmer world.


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## ChetMC (Aug 27, 2005)

I think that another person like us could spot us.... I don't know how much we stick out to the mainstream though.

We use cloth diapers. We don't own a car. We don't buy paper towels or swiffer cloths. We're the only people on our street who compost. DH and I both wear our kids as babies and toddlers. We buy a lot of wooden, metal and natural fibre toys. We don't have any cable or broadcast television (just DVDs, Netflix, and downloaded stuff with the commercials stripped out). We co-sleep. DD takes a lunch to school and there's no packaged stuff in it.

However, we still own plastic containers. Our kids have plastic toys like Lego and Playmobil. We buy freezer bags for freezing meat. Our kids wear clothes from Gymboree, Osh Kosh, Target, and The Children's Place. DD's backpack for school is from Lands End. We eat hot dogs. I'd buy raw milk if I could get it, but I can't so we drink regular non-organic milk from the grocery store. We buy bananas, and we're going to hell for it. We shop at Costco.

We live near downtown Montreal though. I think we'd need to be pretty weird before anybody here would notice.


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## AllyRae (Dec 10, 2003)

I don't know...a lot of crunchy people I know look pretty much like me--and we look like non-crunchy people only we'll sit down, lift our shirt, and nurse our toddlers, then pull some organic healthy food out of our reusable grocery bag to feed our preschoolers, who are busy exploring the world around them without being hovered over.







: I guess I don't know what "crunchy" looks like, because in central Ohio, crunchy doesn't look like the "hippy stereotype"...they just look like everyday people who just happen to do things a bit greener.

Maybe that's also why I don't feel all ostricized or left out or "weird"....my cleaning choices, vaccine choices, whether my fruit has pesticides on it, and other aspects of "green" don't really come up in everyday conversations, nor do I flaunt it around on a t-shirt.







: Our kid's cloth and/or eco-friendly disposibles are under her clothes. And most of our other green choices either aren't relevant outside of our home, or they blend in with the rest of the world (since nobody really takes notice of the fact that you use a reusable container instead of a disposable one, filter your tap water, ect. )And I don't own birkenstocks. Although I've always wanted to try them (I can't see spending $100 on a pair of sandles though.







: )


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## Alyantavid (Sep 10, 2004)

I think people are usually surprised. But mostly because we don't scream our life choices to people. Except I am one of about 5 people in our little town who always uses my reusuable grocery bags. Which are filled with everything from local, organic milk to rice milk to Lay's chips.


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## rhiOrion (Feb 17, 2009)

I'd say we're somewhere between choices 2 and 3.

But, that's actually where we probably are on the crunchy meter, too.

We have a crib sidecarred to the bed. Lots of baby carriers hanging from the back of DD's door. A laundry hamper for cloth diapers. A spray bottle of vinegar and water. Most of our other cleaning supplies and soaps are Method brand. We have a worm box in the back yard, but most people wouldn't know what it was if they saw it. Various reusable grocery bags.

But we have lots of plastic toys. We use paper towels and ziploc bags. We eat middle-of-the-road food.

So, we look about as crunchy as we are.


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## tabrizia (Oct 24, 2007)

I chose the second option, but it is probably somewhere between 2 & 3. There are baby carriers scattered throughout the house along with cloth diapers and no cribs, though they are 3 adult beds, so it isn't completely obvious that DD still co-sleeps nightly and DS co-sleeps part of most nights. There are also tons of plastic toys with more natural toys sprinkled throughout them, along with a ton of electronics. You won't know we didn't have cable unless you tried to use our TV and figured out that we only have gaming systems and Apple TV hooked up to it.

Especially now that mine are 19 months and 3 1/2 it is a bit harder, since the no bottles and no baby food thing isn't really obvious anymore, and DD doesn't normally nurse around company, even though she is still nursing. If you looked in our pantry and fridge you might or might be able to tell, we have a bunch of organic items, but we also have cookies and fresh made cupcakes out right now too. I think just looking around most people's house it would be a bit hard to tell quite honestly.


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## Chicky2 (May 29, 2002)

I guess it depends on the observers definition of crunchy. I have long dreads, my dh has long salt and pepper hair (mostly salt now, lol) he wears in a ponytail. We homebirthed, ebf, co slept, mostly cd when our kids were that age, both of us wore our babies ALOT, we don't vax or circ, we wear hand-knit or crocheted items in the winter (have a dd w/AS and OCD which manifests in beautiful knitting, lol), we use cloth napkins and washcloths in the kitchen, we clean w/vinegar, baking soda, and borax, we drink raw goat milk, raise our own honey bees, raise our own meats (rabbits, chickens, guineas, ducks, goats, soon pigs), will make our own cheese when we have goat milk of our own (we get it across the road for free now). Family activities include foraging for nuts and berries, butchering our meats, playing games at home together. We do have satellite, we home school, several of us play instruments, and I cook most of our food from scratch. We do buy some crap, though, lol. I have a bday girl today who is currently eating gummy worms.









I've always said we are the funkiest crunchygranolatreehuggin'homesteadin'homebirthin'r edneckedhippies you'll ever meet!


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## nicky85 (Jul 10, 2010)

My husband has shoulder length hair and a short beard and likes to tie a bandana around his head. I can't count the number of times we have been out and someone has asked him if he's a hippie! I'm not too crunchy looking- jeans and a sweatshirt most of the time. Once people hear about our diet (60-80% raw vegan), they know we're crunchy! We do part-time co-sleeping, breastfeeding until 18-24 months, EC, CD, no vax, and see a chiropractor regularly. My husband is even trying his hand at growing us some greens.


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## SunRise (Apr 18, 2005)

1 car family, no t.v. or no cable, composting, healthful eating, cloth bags, pellet stoves, wood stoves, piles of wood dumped outside waiting to be split and stacked, etc are common things in my neighbourhood and amongst my kid's friends families so we wouldn't stand out any more then the next door neighbour!
Many families are university profs or admin staff, environmental engineers, computer geeks, self-healers (acupuncturists, massage therapists (I know 4 in my neighbourhood)) ... white collar jobs

But some visual things around my home would be small counter top compost under sink, beside the recycle bin, rain barrel in garden, compost barrel in garden, tomatoes, beans etc growing in garden. Weeds (i.e. no chemicals) in front lawn. 1 semi compact car in driveway. We have a biggish flat screen tv but no cable.
Drawer full of lunch re-usable containers, lots of cotton serviettes, dishtowels stacked up.
We each have our own bed, but two of them are nicely made and rarely used for sleeping in. One big bed is disheveled and clearly used.
Several slings, carriers hanging off hooks in front door way.

Soon to be a pile of wood dumped in the driveway...

Slowcooker emitting some yummy smells.


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## CBEmomma (Oct 24, 2010)

Well I think we look normal and everyone else doesn't









Friends and family know we are crunchy. We eat organic foods, cloth diaper, babywear, co-sleep, had a homebirth, are unsure of vaccines (our oldest had horrible horrible reactions and our Doctor thinks it's best to leave vaccines alone with him and not vaccinate our youngest yet. So we'll talk about it again later with him and see how everything is), recycle, use re-usable bags, etc. etc. etc. I don't think strangers really know, mainly because many don't even know what crunchy is. They can probably tell we do things differently with me wearing our youngest in non-traditional baby carriers (I use MTs, wraps and the Ergo mostly) and you can usually see a piece of a cloth diaper sticking out. It really doesn't bother me what others would think. We live and parent the way we feel is best for our children and ourselves and no one knows me or my kids better than I do.


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## oaktreemama (Oct 12, 2010)

I chose if people know what to look for. We co-sleep, ebf, erf, no circ, homecook (some organic as we can't afford 100% here), lots of wood or open ended toys, no cartoons, no Disney, no Nick, hardly any junk.

We recycle but so does eveyrone else-it is the law in our city. We use cloth bags but so do half the population. We are able to buy a lot of local produce that isn't techincally organic (many small farms around here don't bother) but is fresh and delicious. Our city encourages you to compost and use rain barrels so again environmental choices just don't make you stick out around here.

However, we do vax, use sposies, use daycare and we are HUGE Buckeyes, Browns and Indians fans. Our son is growing up in a house and family filled with sports nuts.


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## verde (Feb 11, 2007)

We're actually between one and two. We drive old, used cars but one is fueled by vegetable oil. We have organic gardens, composters and chickens, shop in co-ops, farmers markets and thrift stores, and cosleep. I have to look reasonably professional at my job but I'm "out" about my crunchiness. My husband has a beard but keeps his hair short because he says long hair is too hot.


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## Nicole730 (Feb 27, 2009)

nak

I'd say we don't look that crunchy.

Not as mainstream:

delay vax
homebirth
consumed placenta
family cloth
bed-share
extended rearface
extended breastfeed

more mainstream crunchy:
eat as much organic as possible
avoid most processed/pre-packaged foods
vegetarian
veggie garden
compost
recycle
cloth bags

also cloth diaper and babywear (and homemade a lot of both of those) - I feel like babywearing and cloth diapering is becoming more mainstream...but maybe that's just the people I hang out with


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## GardenStream (Aug 21, 2007)

If they knew what to look for, then they would see it. Rain water collection for the passive solar greenhouse would be a clue. The clothesline out in the yard. The 2500 square foot organic garden. The orientation of the house (it's a bit off from the other houses which all face the street) to maximize sun exposure and heat the house in winter. On the inside there are lots of things that give it away. The composter in the kitchen, the vermicomposter in the laundry room, the cloth diapering station upstairs, the home canned goods everywhere, the items fermenting on the kitchen island. The cloth bags by the door in the mudroom. The huge stack of egg cartons we need to return to our egg supplier.

Other things were totally uncrunchy with. There are plastic toys all over my livingroom, the Disney channel is on half the morning, our clothes are totally normal, DH works a very normal job, our oldest goes to preschool, DH and I both have SUVs.

I don't think most people would have any idea what we're really like just by glancing at us.


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## Marissamom (Dec 17, 2009)

we are just a little crunchy. we are natural birth, delayed/limited vaccination, exclusive breastfeeding in the 1st 6 months, more baby-lead solids, some babywearing, now mostly cloth diapering (though didn't start with cloth until 9 months), still breastfeeding my toddler though my second pregnancy, and plan on tandeming, co-slept for 15 months, and will co-sleep the second (don't own a crip, though we did use a packnplay), extended rear-facing, and tend more toward gentle discipline. but we also eat mostly processed foods, don't recycle or compost (due to living in an apartment where it's not available), don't use green products for most things, and do use paper towels and zip-lock bags. I think we're going to keep getting crunchier as time goes on, we've already made the leap into CD, are venturing into family cloth, I'm planning on mama cloth after the pregnancy, and I'm also planning on trying EC this time around (DD did start EC/early PL at 11.5 months).


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## shnitzel (Jan 6, 2010)

I don't think I look crunchy at all unless I am wearing DD in a wrap, we have a (hand me down) bugaboo stroller which looks very uncrunchy and use it a lot since we don't have a car.
I live in a place where a lot of crunchiness seems to be mainstream, organic is common and a lot of people babywear and I do see women breastfeeding in public.
I do think because of the way I dress people - knee length skirts, tights, wig/scarf people assume I am completely mainstream minded although that might just be an assumption on my part. I always wonder what people's perception is of me when they see me. When I laugh about how crunchy I am getting DH always comments how I don't look the part (said with relief).
It's funny b/c when people come over they often do comment that they didn't know I was into healthy food - by the box of sugary organic cereal which I consider total garbage that I try to buy to prevent DH from buying garbage mainstream cereal if I am not up by the time he comes home for breakfast. I also don't think people realize how healthy the food I cook is because it tastes good. People seem to assume that healthy food tastes awful, and I love creating dessert which makes me really seem uncrunchy.
If people bring up certain subjects like childbirth I will only half voice my opinion so I don't think most people realize how diehard a natural childbirth fan I am and when I mention DD sleeps in my bed I play it off as convenience instead of something I believe in. So I don't think most people consider me crunchy.


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## ErinYay (Aug 21, 2008)

Neat question!

We're probably seen as being nerdy weirdos, but not so much crunchy.

DH and I both have visible-in-short-sleeves tattoos (I have a flower on the left inner wrist, 3 red stars on the inside of my right arm, and these caaaa-razy bear tattoos on each shoulder, DH has a G clef and a green power-up mushroom from Super Mario on his left inner wrist, a Metroid (video game) on his left shoulder, and the Army Airborne seal or whatever on his right shoulder), he has a lip ring, we dress anywhere from nerdy-skater-post-punks-who-grew-up to professional fancy-pants, and we're constantly joking around in public. "Goofy" is probably a good word to describe how we appear, and I mean that very lovingly.

Those who know us even a little bit aren't surprised at our parenting choices, but I don't think anyone would glance at us and think, "I betchya they had their babies in a yurt and named them all IsisStoneMaven."

Our home has a pretty "Yup, they're gonna homeschool vibe," despite the zillion dollars of electronics everywhere. We have oodles of books, craft supplies, art stuff, instruments, and it's decorated in a pretty modern-eclectic way. If you looked through our books, though, you'd have no idea what to make of us. From dog training books to Christian apologetics to chaos theory to libertarian stuff- we're all over the map. People *are* usually surprised to learn that we're conservative (religiously, not politically) Christians, but oh well, too bad for them.

I *DO* plan on purchasing a denim jumper, thick woolen stockings, and close-toed Birks for when we start homeschooling, because I think that stereotype is toooo hilarious!


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## Llyra (Jan 16, 2005)

Um.


















I'm guessing that to the outside world, we're pretty raging crunchy. Like walking, talking stereotypes, really. Not in a sort of upper-middle-class rustic "country" way, though, like my in-laws-- we're more crunchy in a sort of tattered and patched and homemade way.

I'm not sure how i feel about that.

but we have made some surprisingly mainstream choices. I work (albeit part-time) for a for-profit corporation. My kids are all vaxed. I live in a townhouse complex. DD1 goes to public school. We haven't totally shunned plastic. And I have a minivan. (Granted, I also have three kids in carseats. It's hard to fit three kids in a Prius. And my minivan is ten years old, has a big gouge on one side, and is plastered in controversial bumper stickers. So maybe it doesn't count.)

but there's definitely no mistaking the crunchy. No way, at all. Total strangers would pick up on it, instantly.


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## Ravensong13 (Sep 28, 2009)

I'm not sure what people would think when they see our home. To me it is normal, but that might be because I only ever see into a few homes of those I know who have children and they look a lot like ours. We have a stick on picture of a dinosaur on the wall in our front room as well as a map of the world with pictures of animals and facts on Africa( I started doing simple world geography with dd). We have five cats and two rats as well as six large house plants. We don't really use our tv and the living room is filled with dd's mostly wooden toys. Right now there is a large card board spaceship in the middle of the living room that we are working on coloring. The kitchen table has my tarot cards all over it, three black candles and a bottle of Florida Water( I like to cleanse the house a lot around this time of year). I think in looking at us, well me at least, they are surprised to hear I'm as crunchy as I am. I have a septum ring and ten rather large visible tattoos. I recently shaved my head( My extensions I had in for my wedding were driving me insane!) so I think I look more like a punk hara krishna than a sahm and wife, lol. We do have a large garden and would hang the cloth diapers out back in the summer, which I think would clue some of the neighbors in. Mostly I think people would just think we're weird if they saw in our home. All of my 'Witchy' stuff, my husband constantly out back twirling and blowing fire, and the mass of child friendly projects and play areas inside would just surprise most folks.
BUt I don't know, I don't often ask people what they think of my family nor do I care much, lol.


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## crunchy_mommy (Mar 29, 2009)

I never thought about this but I guess people can tell... We only have vegan, natural food in the house. Our bedroom contains a big mattress on the floor where all 3 of us sleep. We have a lot of natural toys (though we also have a lot of plastic toys, most of which are strewn in the front yard). When someone asks for a tissue or a paper towel, they are handed a piece of cloth or a rag (which is apparently incomprehensible) and we have a big bin of cloth diapers in the bathroom. But, no one knows that we use family cloth since there's always a nice fresh roll of toilet paper ready, and they don't know that the soap in the soap dispenser is castille soap, or that we wash dishes & laundry with things like baking soda & vinegar, or that DS isn't vaxed... We baby-wear and extended nurse so I guess that's generally apparent... but we wear regular, mainstream clothes and no one knows they are hand-me-downs or thrift store finds though are clothes aren't always up with the current fashions & definitely not any recognizable brand... Some of my co-workers used to call me a hippy but I think that was more about being vegan and peace-loving... and I do think people are suprised about our religion & political stance (strict Catholic, lean right...)


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## NightOwlwithowlet (Jun 13, 2009)

I was raised "crunchy". Back in the 70's, my parents wear baby wearing, commune living, pot smoking, organic eating , back to the land and raise all your own food hippies. I was home schooled/unschooled before there was a name for it.

I automatically recycle, bring my own reusable bags, drive small cars, live in a small house. It never occurred to me not to. But we all rebel in our own way and I love my indoor plumbing, central heating, monogamous marriage and high speed internet.

I've lived in ultra crunchy areas where I was called a "sell out" because I shave my legs in the summer and wear mascara. I lived in ultra conservative areas were I was called "crunchy" because I shave my legs in the summer and wear mascara.

We don't look too crunchy, but we are sort of crunchy. We homes school, eat some organic food, we compost, DH uses a push reel mower. We have some low key solar panels. We have tons of books. I make most of our food due to food allergies. DS didn't see commercial TV until he was over five years. I work for a nonprofit. I volunteer a lot. DH is an engineer who works for alternative energy companies. We extended BF, co slept, baby wore and use GD because that was how I was raised and it didn't occur to me not.

An ex bf once tried to convince me I wasn't crunchy because I like my comforts (nice clothes, occasional manicures and hair cuts, showers). Perhaps being crunchy is in the eye of the beholder.


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## lilyka (Nov 20, 2001)

What does crunchy even look like? A lot of what keeps getting mentioned seems more like the hallmark of the modern yuppy dream. Living in a green community, shopping at whole foods, top quality wooden toys, cute name brand organic clothes for kids (and if you think those names are any less recognized than Gap or Gymboree I would disagree), Just the right sling, the safest car and carseat, just the right cloth diapers, the right private school (preferably something alternative or endorsing a second language. a public charter is ok as well.)...even gentle discipline is firmly a middle class thing expectation. Lets face it...none of that stuff is cheap and is definitely a status symbol.

I think stylishly crunchy is the new mainstream and middle class. I would be shocked if most of the people here looked any different from what I would expect from the average middle class and up.


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## Peony (Nov 27, 2003)

So I live in a college, green town full of people that would appear crunchy. Tie dye, dreads, etc.. are all in full force here! I can't count how many families I know that live in yurts, co-housing, or some type of commune. As for me, I live in a regular house that I keep up on, nice furnishings, my oldest goes to a private school. I drive an SUV, wear makeup, highlight my hair, shave my pits, and am usually found in a skirt and boots that is more hip then hippy. I can look out of place in my town but I UC, all my children still sleep with us, they do not even have their rooms, I don't vax, I have BF for almost 8 years straight now. As far as food goes, we are middle of the road, we can eat some crap but then other things I make myself.

The only thing you would notice in the house is the lack of beds for 3 children.


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## happysmileylady (Feb 6, 2009)

I voted about as crunchy as pudding.

But then, that's pretty much how I consider myself. I tend to think of myself as normal with a few cruncy tendancies.

My only crunchy tendancies are-
I babywear...I kinda have a ring sling fetish and I make my own...a lot. But I make them out of straight up $2 or less a yard fabrics, I don't bother with organic whatever.

I personally prefer to use dish cloths/towels to clean up messes. DH prefers paper towels so we have those too, and we use those as napkins for dinner.

I don't have reusable grocery bags, but I regularly and often reuse plastic grocery bags.

I garden when I am able (drought this year, in addition to being pg over the summer, my garden didn't work this year) and I preserve through freezing a lot of stuff from it.

I am BFing....but the primary reason is just because it's free.

And, my youngest is in a cradle in our bedroom. Some have told me that is co sleeping, some have told me not. I refuse to have baby in the bed...not only is our bed considered not safe by any co sleeping advocate, nor is DH for that matter, but the idea alone scares the crap out of me.

Other than that, I am totally the picture of what most here call mainstream.


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## ErinYay (Aug 21, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lilyka* 
What does crunchy even look like? A lot of what keeps getting mentioned seems more like the hallmark of the modern yuppy dream. Living in a green community, shopping at whole foods, top quality wooden toys, cute name brand organic clothes for kids (and if you think those names are any less recognized than Gap or Gymboree I would disagree), Just the right sling, the safest car and carseat, just the right cloth diapers, the right private school (preferably something alternative or endorsing a second language. a public charter is ok as well.)...even gentle discipline is firmly a middle class thing expectation. Lets face it...none of that stuff is cheap and is definitely a status symbol.

I think stylishly crunchy is the new mainstream and middle class. I would be shocked if most of the people here looked any different from what I would expect from the average middle class and up.

I totally agree.

When I'm wearing my amazing Garnet Hill outfits (my mom works part-time at their shop in NH just for the employee sales and discounts, which is SUCH a score for me as I get them FREE from her!) I think I could easily be seen as One Of _THOSE_ Moms- cart full of organic ingredients (I cook primarily from scratch), yammering non-stop to my adorably dressed baby who is the epitome of a WASPy Gerber girl (outgoing and social, blonde, blue-eyed), waltzing around all tall and thin (it's not a choice- I lose weight like a crazy person when nursing!)- I must REEK of upper-middle-class entitlement, which couldn't be further from the truth!


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## jajah (Oct 16, 2010)

I don't know! I know a lot of people who are far crunchier than our family.

There's also a big discrepancy between the lifestyle choices DH and I make. (He's a smoker, likes junk/fast food, could care less about the amount of waste he creates, etc.) DD and I are pretty "extreme" all-natural foodies and the food in our home reflects that... although DH occasionally requests a box of fruity pebbles or little debbies and I oblige him. He also likes his sodas. We only have cloth dipes on hand for baby #2 due to be born any day now. We didn't use cloth with DD, mostly because we didn't have a w/d at the time. I work for the UU church and a progressive, Reggio preschool. We wear our babies. All natural or homemade cleaning products and bath products (except, once again, DH who likes his gunky soaps). We cosleep. I breastfed DD for 19 months and will bf this one as well. No cable, but we have one tv and a PS3 we use to stream netflix. DD's toys are mostly non-commercial and open-ended. I have a "natural" look, I suppose. I don't do makeup, and I don't color or style my hair. I don't really know how I'd describe my "style." Relaxed? Comfortable? Target clearance rack? My job pretty much requires me to "dress down," so I don't have many nice clothes. DH rolls around in his work clothes most of the time (jeans/ tshirts). We're doing a waterbirth with a midwife at the hospital this time. We prefer homeopathic remedies to drugs. However, we drive our two cars a lot. We use paper towels and baggies sparingly. We definitely use TP. I don't always recycle since it's kind of a pita where we live. We have a crib for new baby and a bed for DD, even if they sleep with us. Basically, we do what feels right and what works for us without trying to adhere to a certain lifestyle while trying to stay informed.

So I guess it really depends on who is looking at us and what aspect of our life they're observing! I think the most shocking thing to people is that DH and I are a couple since we're so different in so many of those lifestyle-choices.

Had to edit this to add that I agree that "crunchy" is the new middle-class norm, especially in the more progressive cities. But that's not always the case as I know plenty of struggling families who do the crunchy thing too.

We live very modestly. Right now, we definitely qualify for living in poverty (it's been a hard year). We have a crappy 2-bedroom apartment (less than 1000sq ft), but it's in a nice, safe part of the city with a wonderful public chartered school system, so here we stay. A lot of our "crunchy" choices are out of necessity (cloth diapers, used/clearance clothes, homemade cleaners and bath products). But food/nutrition is a major priority for me, so we budget, plan, and bargain shop as much as possible to be able to afford natural, whole, minimally processed foods. I definitely see that there's a huge market out there for crunchy, green families and a lot of the cost for this stuff is just absurd to me! (Cloth diapers, specialty clothes, baby carriers, baby/kid products PERIOD) It doesn't have to be done that way! (Although, if I had the money, I'm sure I'd buy into a lot of it too!)


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## tsfairy (May 19, 2004)

We're pretty crunchy and anyone who meets us knows it before too long, but it's probably fairly obvious to strangers who know what to look for...

We have no paper in the house besides toilet paper and use primarily green or homemade cleaning products (vinegar/baking soda for most cleaning, though I admit to buying All detergent when I can't get my Rockin' Green, and I buy 7th gen dishwasher detergent.)

We use reusable grocery bags, but so do most around here. Our neighborhood grocery store has a ton of organics and specialty foods - we can even get grass-fed beef ground in-store! and we mostly buy organic/whole foods. We buy most of our meat, milk and eggs from local farms.

My kids are either barefoot or in soft-soles 95% of the time, and I rarely wear shoes. We let the boys decide if/when they want to cut their hair, so right now DS1 has a fresh short cut, but DS2 has long shaggy hair and looks adorable. DH has a beard but keeps his hair short and his beard trimmed. I don't wear makeup and currently wear funky glasses. The kids are usually dressed pretty normally but always in natural fibers (except for outerwear), but DS2 is in a costume phase right now so odds are good you'll see him wearing his Batman pj's wherever we go lol.

We UC, EC, CD with natural fibers, extended breastfeed/CLW, sleep together in a big family bed, practice gentle discipline/consensual living, unschool, and I still wear my 3yo when he needs it.

But we have way too many plastic toys and watch way too much TV, and I often yell much more than I'd like.


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## Kelly1101 (Oct 9, 2008)

Um, you tell me







I don't know what crunchy looks like and honestly I've never understood what it really means...

What could someone tell from looking at our house?

Well, that's we're poor, hahaha... all of our furniture is cheap and mismatched...

that we don't like TV commercials but like TV (since we have no cable or antennae for picking up channels, but tons of DVDs...)

that my husband is a painter and white walls bore us







(I have an orange kitchen, a grey bathroom, a blue bedroom, a purple kids room, a green office, and a chocolate/tan living room)

I guess they could tell that we breastfeed since there are no bottles or formula around, and that the boppy is always thrown on one piece of furniture or another...

that my toddler will pick up anything that isn't nailed down, and put it on the floor, on a chair, on a shelf, etc

we have wooden toys and plastic toys... "organic" local food from the farmer's market around the corner, and goldfish crackers from walmart... a stroller and a rack of baby carriers (two slings, a mei tai, and a bjorn... I think my baby carriers are breeding, how did I end up with so many...)

could tell that we cloth diaper because that's obvious from not only the changing table full of cloth diapers but that usually there is either a basket full of clean ones or a bag full of dirty ones in the laundry room...

we have a bedroom with a queen sized mattress, and kids room with a twin mattress and a crib, so people would probably think that my husband and I sleep in the bedroom, the toddler on the twin, and the baby in the crib... [when really it's my husband and the toddler on the queen, me and the baby on the twin, and the crib is for keeping the toddler from jumping on the baby if I have to pee]

I don't know what else


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## JayGee (Oct 5, 2002)

We don't look at all crunchy from the outside. People would be shocked to know that we ALL sleep in one room







! Makes me wonder (daily....) why we bought a house with 4 bedrooms.


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## mambera (Sep 29, 2009)

I'm not crunchy (see siggie) but I definitely fall on the mushy side of the parenting spectrum in the US. A lot of people at work have voiced surprise at the degree to which I prioritize my kid over other stuff (like, work). Which to me is like, duh! - but apparently I project the image of a hard-nosed careerist. Or something.


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## [email protected] (Sep 7, 2010)

I'm not crunchy, but like this discussion board. We co-slept, never used the "cry it out method", breastfed, tried sign, use gentle discipline, and baby wore. However, lots of people in the general "non-crunchy" population do these things. I'm also all for homeschooling or Montessori (though our kid is in public school, which I also support), and know "non-crunchies" who choose these routes. Alternative families are the norm in my area (Seattle), and I love the diverse population mix.

I do not agree w/ many of the opinions expressed on these boards (ex. unassisted childbirth, eating the placenta, avoiding vaccinations, avoiding mainstream medicine in general, and breastfeeding beyond age 2 or so). However, I find the conversations fascinating sometimes & want to hear alternative viewpoints. Thanks for letting me participate.


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## Learning_Mum (Jan 5, 2007)

I don't think we look crunchy at all. We have a minimilist home. We have plastic toys and will eat at McD's. We use natural cleaning products (but so do alot of people around here). We have a compost bin (but, again, so do alot of people around here). I used to BW but DS2 is 2.5yo now so doesn't really want to be worn anymore. I didn't do extended BF but DS2 bottle nurses and will give them up when he's ready. We co-sleep but it's not really something I talk about. DS1 has his own room with a bed but doesn't use it for sleeping in. I guess people might wonder where DS2 sleeps. I was much more GD, CL before I became a single mother, now I'm more authoritarian because I have to be for my own mental health. I use disposable nappies because I never found the cloth love. We eat mainly paleo / whole foods but DS1 does have muesli bars for lunch, and he's in school because I would be crap at homeschooling. We selectively vax (which drives my doctor a bit insane I have to say) I don't think anyone apart from my family and doctor know that though. We don't circ (which is the norm here anyway) but I am opposed to it.

I look nothing like a 'hippy'. I am more on the trendy side. I shave and wear make up and dye my hair. I pretty much let the boys decide about when to get their hair cut but there does come a point when I try to encourage them to get it cut. DH is way more mainstream than me but he goes along with alot of what I want. He has been very on board with AP / GD / CL though.

Honestly we don't look crunchy at all, but then I guess compared to alot here, we're not at all!


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## hildare (Jul 6, 2009)

i think we're just total weirdos.. i would've voted for 'none of the above!'
we are crunchy in the ways mdc folks would assume.. no vax, cloth diaps, bf, etc. but.. we don't look like the crunch variety so much, and we most definitely don't resemble 'normal' people.
i am not sure what the rural folks in the grocery store think of us at all. we get stares! especially when we wore the baby. apparently people in our area haven't seen that much.
we both have longer hair. i have lots of tattoos. dh likes to wear combat boots even with shorts in the summer, and likes to wear his guns outside his pants. i guess our house and car have the crunch, though.


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## St. Margaret (May 19, 2006)

I know you can tell, if you know what to look for, because we were joking at playgroup once that we had tokens so we could find each other, even if we were new to the group-- babies in cloth, amber necklaces, mostly stainless and glass containers for food, stainless water bottles, babies in cloth carriers, blankets instead of strollers, etc. But now that DD is older, it's probably hard to tell when our family is out walking about. We still have the stainless bottles and no stroller, but only sometimes a beco, and we all dress pretty "normally."

If you came into our home, you'd see lots of wooden toys and some waldorfy dolls I've made, playsilks I've dyed, but also legos and playmobil stuff. You'd find mostly organic stuff in the kitchen but some convenience foods, too. Our beds even look "normal" right now, mostly, with DD in a huge bed in "her" room and our bed all by itself in our room.

Once baby comes, though, there will be a crib side car again, and I'll never be seen without a wrap and a baby on me, or nursing


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## treeoflife3 (Nov 14, 2008)

My husband is military... people can't get past the fact that I don't bleed red white and blue nor do I believe either of us deserves special treatment for his service to realize how crunchy I am. People are shocked as it is that I don't do ALL my shopping at the commissary and PX and rely 100% on military doctors and have zero desire to participate in the FRG or make the military our entire life









Of course, if they came to the house, they'd see how few toys kiddo has, that we don't use paper towels, that I use family cloth, and that kiddo is still nursed







a bit of a talk and they'd learn I don't vax, if I had a son he would be left intact, and I prefer buying organic and local foods.

but... most people I know are military... and they can't get past the fact that we don't breathe army to see anything else.


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## ~PurityLake~ (Jul 31, 2005)

I guess I'd need to know specifically what is 'normal' and what is 'crunchy' in appearance in order for me to answer this poll.


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## JudiAU (Jun 29, 2008)

If you saw us on the street you wouldn't look twice. Our clothing isn't noticeable other than natural fabrics/comfortable cuts, and slings are common wear I live. I don't have tatoos or whatever. I don't look like a hippie. =)

There are about 10,000 prius cars on the streets here and although most people don't consider it the "big family car." But our house is pretty crunchy. All the food is healthy/organic and we have a freezer full of pastured meat on our apartment balconey. hee hee We do cloth diapers even though we don't have laundry. All the toys/kids stuff is green. There are no characters and no plastic junk. We have a lot of books and the kids are media-free although we do have a big tv. All of my volunteer work is associated with green living. I WFT but pump until 18m

The only area that we aren't very crunchy about is that we happily vaccinate on schedule. I don't think I would be willing to nurse a three year old but I wouldn't really really try and stop a toddler from weaning before 2. We consume too much and can't garden. I am sick of living in such an urban environment. I am not very peaceful either. I write a lot of letters to pretty much everyone. I would never, ever homeschool. And although I did have an accidental unassisted homebirth, I don't consider it a safe choice for my family.

I find the diversity of opinion on mothering fascinating and my husband has joked that by the time we retire, we'll be using family cloth. Everyone time I think I am crunchy I read abut something on mothering and think, woa, slow down, that makes me think.

I don't even think my cloth diapers are all that crunchy because they are synthetic pockets. Now wool covers that I hand knit from wool that I carded...that is crunchy.


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## Drummer's Wife (Jun 5, 2005)

I'm going to guess we don't look crunchy on the outside. We live in a big house, drive an SUV, dress nicely (well, at least the kids do







). But yet, if you came inside you might realize we use vinegar to clean and cloth diaper (and so on). The clues might be if someone saw DH with a toddler strapped to his back in a carrier, or me NIP. They might not have realized that when they saw me feeding our youngest, I was also tandem nursing with his 3 yo brother. Those kinds of things weren't very apparent, yk? Now, if you get me talking, I might mention co-sleeping and gentle discipline, or how we used to homeschool, etc.


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## Joyster (Oct 26, 2007)

There's a crunchy look checklist now? Oh my!


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## Smokering (Sep 5, 2007)

Heh, fun thread.
*
Things people might immediately notice:*
-No TV (although we do have a projector, so really...)
-I don't wear makeup
-Lots of "weird" ingredients in the kitchen, like kibbled rye and sourdough rising on the counter
-Not many "packet" foods
-LOTS of books, including lots of classics and theological books
-Strange supplements like fermented cod liver oil and cell salts
-I have no fashion sense








-DD doesn't appear to have a bedroom!
-Funny things in the bathroom - no shampoo, but containers of amla and coconut oil and shikakai
-We don't have a dryer, but do have two clothes horses
-I have a sewing machine and a huge stash of fabric, some of which is obviously second-hand
-We have a veggie garden... which is not exactly a work of art, nor does it advertise diligent attention and great gardening skill. But it's there, and sometimes it has things growing in it, and sometimes they are edible. And occasionally they are even heirloom.








-No car.
*
Things people would only notice if they were in the know:*
-A small container of greyish powder in the pantry that was DD's placenta
-My hair isn't dyed with commercial dye OR natural, but hennaed (hmm, does that make me more or less crunchy than someone with natural hair?)








-All my tops and dresses are breastfeeding-compatible, and I wear nursing bras and tanks
-Our computers are Linux








-A fair few of our grocery purchases are non-mainstream - the traditionally fermented brand of soy sauce, the honey-cured bacon, the free-range eggs.

As for our personal selves, DH looks pretty normal in an IT-guy kind of way. I definitely look odd - hair long enough to sit on, often worn in a fancy bun or braid, and I often wear homemade clothes. If I'm wearing my ankle-length super-full homemade patchwork skirt I look extremely hippie; at other times I can almost pass for normal, but probably not for "together" or "fashion-conscious".








DD varies wildly - some days she wears cute handmade cotton dresses, other days she wears sixteen layers of nasty day-glo pink hand-me-downs.


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## JudiAU (Jun 29, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lilyka* 
cute name brand organic clothes for kids (and if you think those names are any less recognized than Gap or Gymboree I would disagree), .

So, what brands? I'd like more organic clothes for the kids but have a hard time finding them. I know you were probably joking but.... please share.


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## ~PurityLake~ (Jul 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Joyster* 
There's a crunchy look checklist now? Oh my!


That's what I was thinking. I still have no idea what the OP thinks it means to look crunchy.


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## rere (Apr 21, 2005)

My family doesn't look like some Hollywood stereo type but I think we're pretty "out there" and the only reason you wouldn't know is if it never occurred to you.Like my neighbor who thinks we just don't bother to take care of our grass.It would never occur to him that I actually plant clover because it's good to the earth.And the neighbors who kept offering us their powered lawn tools because we have a push mower and use hand tools.Or how it never occurred to the guy next door that the reason my daughter is always with me is because she homeschools(whereas another neighbor put it together when my daughter was only 3).I think there are lots of clues but if you're not in the know,you might confuse them for something else.I think mainly they think we're poor and lazy(well,we are pretty broke but that's not the point







).


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## Toolip (Mar 7, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *~Purity♥Lake~* 
That's what I was thinking. I still have no idea what the OP thinks it means to look crunchy.









I was thinking that could mean any number of "looks" but it makes people think "oh, she shops at the coop" or "they probably recycle" or whatever.

Plop me in a city and I would stick out like a sore thumb but here, where I live, I blend right in. Mostly I just look very casual.

In my house people would know if they went to find something to clean the toilet and all they could find was vinegar and BS. There are also no paper products (there is tp but I use fc).
There's also the lack of commercial food products on the shelves and fridge. There's lots of jars and bulk items, various ferments and other things that may be dead giveaways.

I don't wear flowy skirts or have long hair. I definitely don't look like a "hippy" but if you look closely you can tell I'm very crunchy.


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## philomom (Sep 12, 2004)

Until I invite you home with me you might never know that ....

a lot of my nice wooden chairs are dumpster finds

most of our clothes are from the Goodwill

that I have urban chickens

that I don't eat a lot of processed food

that we use dishtowels and cloth napkins to save paper

There's probably more, that's all of the obvious ones.


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## lilyka (Nov 20, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *JudiAU* 
So, what brands? I'd like more organic clothes for the kids but have a hard time finding them. I know you were probably joking but.... please share.

I can't remember. I used to get catalogs when my oldest was a baby. it seems like certain brands come up here a lot too.


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## childsplay (Sep 4, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *JudiAU* 
So, what brands? I'd like more organic clothes for the kids but have a hard time finding them. I know you were probably joking but.... please share.


I've gotten some shirts for us made by Threads 4 Thought, they wash like rags and we can wear the $#%@ out of them. But....I bought them sporadically at thrift shops so I've no idea where to buy them other than that. Maybe online. I've also found Faded Glory Organic brand (again at thrift shops) and that holds up really well too.....and pretty darn cool if you ask me. Neither of these I bought because they were organic, I bought them cause I liked 'em.

But really, I always thought that by buying second hand (I buy everything except for socks and undies) was the 'earthy' (crunchy is a foreign term to me, only really hear it here on MDC, but I'm seeing that it's kinda the same)thing to do.
So really, if I'm paying $1.50 for a sweater for DD at a thrift shop, as long as it doesn't have a big splashy logo or a character on it I'm happy. If it keeps her warm and gives me the extra dough to put healthy food on the table then really, IMO, it doesn't matter if it's organic or not.


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## childsplay (Sep 4, 2007)

I always thought of it as being 'earthy'. And practical.

16 years ago when DS was born I used cloth and breastfed.
I wore him in the big old corduroy snuggly because I couldn't afford a stroller.
He slept in an 80 year old wooden cradle (the carved wooden kind that sat on the floor and rocked - by hand) in front of the fire on my Dad's old sheepskin motercycle seat warmer.

THAT had nothing to do with crunchy/earthy, that was just survival. It was practical and it worked for us.

When my second was born I used cloth and breastfed.
When my twins were born I used disp. but still breastfed.
I wore them all until they couldn't stand it. I wore DD on my back until she was well into her fourth year.
I made most of their food.
We heat mainly with wood.
I only buy second hand clothes.
We heat with wood (except for the far reaches)
We've lived off the grid with kids (and pre-kids)
Our kids don't wear visable logos and are often in jeans, long skirts, peasant tops and handmade wool sweaters. BUT, it's not uncommon for them to dress in their Dockers and Polos for school (on their own accord) .
Our meals are mainly homemade from scratch.
Our toys are mostly wood and metal, not because I'm anti plastic, but the plastic crap ALWAYS breaks!!! 4 kids and a home daycare later and I've finally learned








We 'compost' which means feeding the woods creatures.
We had chickens but our neighbors ate them.

OTOH

They never slept with me past their first month.
DS #3 started solids around 4 mos (meaty steak bones - don't ask 







)
I clean with Pine Sol and Murphy Oil Soap.
I am in love with my dryer.
I drive a BIG SUV and, like my dryer, I am in love with it.
Our house is ridiculously big for heating, but, on the other hand, we built/designed it ourselves and it's south facing for solar help.
I (we) have a thing for generators and big engines, and we have many.
I order take out twice a week. Pizza one time, Chinese the next.

I guess we're somewhere in the middle.


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## Norasmomma (Feb 26, 2008)

Who cares?!

I have many ideas that are more on the so-called crunchy side, but where I live *crunchy* is such a clique that I really don't want to be associated with that. It's like everyone tries green-up each other









I like organic food. Can make homemade pizza with the best organic, local flour and then have a frozen pizza for dinner. I co-sleep, breast-feed on demand, most of my kids clothes are thrift store finds and I use sposies(gasp!), since I can get them basically for free with coupons and sales. I planned to have a water-birth ended up with every medical intervention pretty much out there and an emergency c/s. I color my hair, wear make-up most days and LOVE my Great Lash mascara









I like to say I'm mid-stream.


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## oiseau (Mar 30, 2008)

I just asked my fiance his opinion and he said an average person probably wouldn't notice right away coming in to our house, but there are some things that might tip them off. We don't have a TV and guests are always confounded by the lack of paper towels in the kitchen (we do generally have a roll hiding somewhere for cleaning nasty pet messes but not kitchen hand drying). We recycle and compost but both are pretty normal here.
As my fiance said, we don't have any wall hangings or incense burning or anything. Cleaning supplies are all green, we use cloth grocery bags, all our shampoos and soaps are organic/handmade/earth friendly. The cupboards and fridge are full of mostly organic/local/healthy food, but occasionally a Coke sneaks in. I have a very neglected garden full of organic heirloom plants, but that's not necessarily obvious.
We don't have kids yet, so we don't have cloth diapers or wooden toys to tip people off, but I do have issues of Mothering magazine around somewhere. We have a lot of exotic pets/plants, but I don't think that's "crunchy."

If you saw me, depending on what I'm wearing, you could definitely tell I'm not mainstream. I have fuzzy legs and armpits and a lot of my clothes are organic cotton/bamboo, but they're pretty normal looking. The fuzzy legs and lack of makeup would probably be the tip off!


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## kriket (Nov 25, 2007)

We look pretty crunchy, not "continuum bed" crunchy (a la "Away we go") but I have dreadlocks, we CD, cosleep, extended breastfeed blah blah blah.

I think the thing that tips the neighbors off, is I garden in the front yard too. (we live in the city







)

Not having TP or paper towels makes guests wonder whats going on. Either that or they think we are poorer than they originally thought!


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## Callimom (Sep 14, 2004)

Where I live we wouldn't stand out as crunchy. Many of the crunchy "hallmarks" are pretty mainstream here.

Recycling/composting, biking, wearing babies/cloth diapers, eating local/CSAs, nursing past a year/homeschooling, reducing use of plastic bags, activism/volunteering, community gardens/water harvesting, backyard chickens, - all are pretty common where I live, in part because of government/community programs and institutions that support these sorts of things. We have a liberal arts and sciences university, a very strong artist community, a lot of community activists, and a fairly liberal/green political leaning.

You have to be pretty out there to stand out as crunchy in this town.


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## One_Girl (Feb 8, 2008)

Now that my dd is older you can't really tell we are crunchy unless you come into our home and poke around a bit or you know us and how I parent and choose to feed my dd. When dd was younger there were a lot more indicators.


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## OkiMom (Nov 21, 2007)

Id say it depends.. i am known as a "weird mom" by people who get to know me but thats only because they ask about my parenting (hey, what do you do to make time outs work? I dont' do time outs unless theres danger in what they are doing then I sit with them. Buttt... hows that work? etc) but looking at me you wouldn't know it really.

Honestly, you would have to be pretty far out there to be noticed as "weird" over here and even if people thought I was "weird" I wouldn't care one way or the other.


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## cappuccinosmom (Dec 28, 2003)

Well, nobody thinks we're normal.









But I'm pretty sure nobody thinks we're hippies at first glance either.

First thoughts are more like: "Amish. But wait. The kids are brown. And the lady is driving. What...???"


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## mama_daba (Dec 7, 2004)

i live in a very crunchy town so we probably look pretty average. my landlord is very obviously not crunchy and it shows in her home. not sure what in our home looks crunchy but anyone looking at our bookcase or spending any time around us would quickly see the crunchiness. our house is very tiny with one small bedroom and it is pretty obvious we all sleep there on the one bed and stuff like that. i suspect it is just very common here though except for homeschooling no one in this town does and i think when my son gets older if we still live here some people will be upset by it and think we are not being part of the community or something but oh well. we can't afford to buy a house here anyway and if we move it will be at least closer to other homeschoolers.


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## Tigerchild (Dec 2, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Norasmomma* 
I have many ideas that are more on the so-called crunchy side, but where I live *crunchy* is such a clique that I really don't want to be associated with that. It's like everyone tries green-up each other









Yes, I have to laugh sometimes with people saying that "organic" and stuff is somehow non-mainstream. Not true where I live.

There's such a broad spectrum, from Bo-Bos (Bohemian Bourgeois) to primitive Back To The Landers--whether you fit the "look" probably depends on what's predominant where you live.

I can't afford a new hybrid car so I have the Evil Minivan, wear Forbidden Brand Name Bad Bad Bad Clothes (from the consignment/thrift shop), my kids wore thrift shop character clothing when they were younger that they had no clue who the characters were (we can't afford cable, and our TV is over 10 years old, so channel reception kind of sucks), I buy from local farmers who aren't certified organic (they can't afford the process) as much as possible, my kids didn't have all wood toys, our diapers were prefolds with cheap wraps. I don't grow all or even most of my own food, I don't have the cute chicken coop in my backyard, we actually go to the school fundraising night at commercial restaurants. I do wear cloth pads, but--if someone can tell that at a glance, I'm having a REALLY crappy day.

I dislike associating natural living with an "appearance" of any sort. IME, you cannot tell if someone likes that by what car they drive, what house they live in, and the clothes they wear. If we fixate on appearance, we're missing the point.

You don't have to look rich, poor, or middlin' or even not normal to be crunchy. I'd find it pretty sad if someone were "suprised" that I was crunchy based on appearances. I'd consider that pretty ignorant on their part.


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## baglady (Jul 13, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lilyka* 
What does crunchy even look like? A lot of what keeps getting mentioned seems more like the hallmark of the modern yuppy dream. Living in a green community, shopping at whole foods, top quality wooden toys, cute name brand organic clothes for kids (and if you think those names are any less recognized than Gap or Gymboree I would disagree), Just the right sling, the safest car and carseat, just the right cloth diapers, the right private school (preferably something alternative or endorsing a second language. a public charter is ok as well.)...even gentle discipline is firmly a middle class thing expectation. Lets face it...none of that stuff is cheap and is definitely a status symbol.

I think stylishly crunchy is the new mainstream and middle class. I would be shocked if most of the people here looked any different from what I would expect from the average middle class and up.

This is very true where I live. I live in an extremely status conscious area. Everyone I ever see at Whole Foods buying a cart full of organics also has a 5 carat diamond and a Mercedes.

Not that I'm accusing people on these boards of that, that's just the reality of my environment. There just aren't tons of "crunchy" options that are not reserved for those of a very high income. Ex, there is no such thing as a co-op here. And truthfully even whole foods doesn't carry any "alternative" type ingredients. It's like the same old silken tofu that they sell at Walmart and 10 different kinds of organic prepackages cookies.

I mean if I look around, I can find some acceptable alternatives. I have a little produce mart close by that does it's best to buy regionally, albeit conventionally grown produce, etc. In my own home I can do my part by using green cleaners, line drying, etc., etc. which we do.

Of course try to grow tomatoes in your backyard and everyone thinks you're nuts.


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## CCJWGM (May 12, 2007)

We are crunchy to the point that people usually look at us like we have three heads. But then you throw in DH's job and I think it puts us in the next category down since he has the most uncrunchy job in the universe. I usually call us "soggy" because I see crunchy or not crunchy as just a way to compare yourself to someone else. I am super crunchy compared to some and not compared to others. It also depends on what you talk about.

And I TOTALLY understand the clique of the Crunchy. I purposely left that clique once I found out what they were about. It shouldn't be about out "greening" another. It should be about yourself and compassion towards Mother Earth and other humans. The people who "out green" one another are often out right consumers and crunchy is associated with what you buy/look like/own. But we purposely have gotten out of the consumer trap as much as we could. So I may not drive a hybrid and I can't afford the organic clothes for my family but I do the best for my family and our Mother.

I think I'm going to stick with hippie. I'm just another freakin' Oregon hippie.







Yes, another label but with different connotations. Maybe I'll just stick with Beezer, me, myself, and me. Ok. It's after midnight and I'm rambling.


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## MovnMama (Jul 3, 2009)

Haven't read all the replies, but just have to say... this question relates more to the crunchiness of where you live and not just who you are or "appear" to be

For example, we were not considered very crunchy in Portland, OR, when we lived there two years ago. We were just on the crunchy side of normal - babywearing, cloth diapers, and composting - pretty standard with a lot of folks in Portland, which is a big metro area.

We moved to small town Alaska for a job.

You can bet we are the crunchiest people around now!!! A variety of emoticons are necessary to express my feelings about this!







to what people think is normal or appropriate here - you'd think sustainability would be *more* of an issue this far away from everything! and







to most people who shrug and call me "hippy" to my face. And I don't even have hairy pits! (I used to, but...







)


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## Biscuits & Gravy (Jul 17, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *AllyRae* 
I don't know...a lot of crunchy people I know look pretty much like me--and we look like non-crunchy people only we'll sit down, lift our shirt, and nurse our toddlers, then pull some organic healthy food out of our reusable grocery bag to feed our preschoolers, who are busy exploring the world around them without being hovered over.









This made crack up! Sounds very familiar.


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## snoopy5386 (May 6, 2005)

Reading this thread is amazing to me. Some of the things that people do that they thinky is "a little crunchy" or "moderately crunchy" would make my very mainstream family's head spin. Family cloth? homebirth? tandem nursing? butchering your own meat? no tv in the house? eating a placenta? These are all wayyyyyyy out there for most of mainstream America.


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## SubliminalDarkness (Sep 9, 2009)

I don't think we look crunchy to most people. I mean, we dress pretty.... I dunno. Well, DH and I buy a lot at Banana Republic







And the kids mostly wear Gymboree. So.....
We do have a hybrid car, a Honda Insight. But our other vehicle is a regular minivan.
We cloth diaper, but you wouldn't know that just looking at us.
I don't use deodorant and I use mama cloth and stuff, but people wouldn't know that just looking at me. I wear make-up and that's all pretty standard.
We only eat organic and natural stuff. But unless someone looked in my fridge, they wouldn't know.
My almost 4 year old is still breastfeeding, but again, you'd have to be with us 24/7 to know that.
We use reusable stuff whenever possible, but even that's not so uncommon. The store I shop at doesn't even have disposable bags. If you don't have a bag, they put your stuff in empty wine boxes.
I make my own detergent. I cook everything from scratch. Hmmm... What else.
We don't have a TV, which does raise some eyebrows. We also only use Apple products, which also rings some bells.... lol.
I think people know we're not conservative based on a few things.... the interracial marriage, the tattoos, and so on. But people are generally surprised to find out how non-religious we are. They nearly always assume we're just not super active in religion. I don't know how that falls on the 'crunch' scale, but it is one thing that catches people by surprise.

I think walking on the street, we look normal. And most people who meet us just think we're pretty normal. You really have to come for dinner and stay a while to notice much out of the ordinary.


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## Attached2Elijah (Jun 27, 2004)

I don't think it's really obvious that we are... but if people who knew what to look for would definitely see it in the home. My kids are old enough that they aren't in diapers, take snacks with us most places or anything that shows our crunchiness while out and about. However, once you're in the house, you might notice the lack of paper products when you ask for a paper towel, napkin, etc. You might notice the faint hint of lemon and vinegar if I just cleaned. You might notice the halogen light bulbs when turning on a light. You might notice the from scratch meal I just cooked if you're over for dinner. You might notice the canning jars ALL over my kitchen (both full and empty). You would notice that my fridge is oddly empty compared to most households since I do can and make stuff from scratch. You might notice the things that ARE in said fridge are farm fresh chicken eggs, raw goat's milk and random open canning jars. You may notice my OVERLY full freezer from freezing stuff from our garden. You may also notice my 3 season garden/container gardens and the herb garden out front (especially since I live in an apartment and don't have a YARD!) You might notice our compost bin outback. You might notice my Buddha and Pagan statues. You might notice we have a MINIMUM of 2 beds in EACH bedroom.

However, generally people DON'T notice those things unless they know me pretty well. It's not something I flaunt to just anyone. My neighbor of 3 years that is over at my house at least a few times a week JUST noticed a few of these things and was like "Whoa, you're kind a hippie, aren't you?" the other day... I just laughed and said "a little bit," but inside I felt like it was a big compliment







People on the street have absolutely no clue. We don't wear name brands and I tend to make a lot of our clothing/bags/etc but even that doesn't really get noticed. We just look like your average joe family


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## contactmaya (Feb 21, 2006)

Well, i use a stroller, so i dont look very crunchy there. But i still often have ds in the mei tai whilst pushing the stroller...so myabe i look crunchy there... On the other hand, i wear very casual clothes, and my boys are often in pink or purple...not sure what we look like there. My 2yo is often in bare feet because he keeps taking his shoes off and i err on the side of consensual rather than authoritarian,...i probably just look neglectful. Sometimes i nurse my toddler in public...probably look crunchy there...

If people came into our home, they would see a very big bed that we all share-i suppose that might look crunchy. I woul be serving fruit, rather than goldfish as a snack... but...there would be a tv, and a few thomas videos...not so crunchy....

No idea really. What exactly does crunchy look like?


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## Doodlebugsmom (Aug 1, 2002)

Hmmmm. I don't know that we look "crunchy," but I think we look "different." Dh looks kind of like Johnny Knoxville. He has a high-status profession, but typically wears skateboarding clothes/shoes. It's acceptable in his line of work. As a matter of fact, most of his clothing he gets for free from the big skateboard apparel companies. I'm one who dresses for comfort. Jeans, Simple sneakers or Chaco sandals and a North Face or Columbia t-shirt. So, we don't really dress like most of the mid-late 30s folks we see around here. I didn't know how to vote on this one.


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## ~PurityLake~ (Jul 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Tigerchild* 
I dislike associating natural living with an "appearance" of any sort. IME, you cannot tell if someone likes that by what car they drive, what house they live in, and the clothes they wear. If we fixate on appearance, we're missing the point.

You don't have to look rich, poor, or middlin' or even not normal to be crunchy. I'd find it pretty sad if someone were "suprised" that I was crunchy based on appearances. I'd consider that pretty ignorant on their part.











Quote:


Originally Posted by *MovnMama* 
Haven't read all the replies, but just have to say... this question relates more to the crunchiness of where you live and not just who you are or "appear" to be

For example, we were not considered very crunchy in Portland, OR, when we lived there two years ago. We were just on the crunchy side of normal - babywearing, cloth diapers, and composting - pretty standard with a lot of folks in Portland, which is a big metro area.

We moved to small town Alaska for a job.

You can bet we are the crunchiest people around now!!! A variety of emoticons are necessary to express my feelings about this!







to what people think is normal or appropriate here - you'd think sustainability would be *more* of an issue this far away from everything! and







to most people who shrug and call me "hippy" to my face. And I don't even have hairy pits! (I used to, but...







)

I feel you there. I was really surprised at how conservative Alaska is. I assumed it would not be so, but sadly, I was wrong.


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## Lauren82 (Feb 26, 2007)

DH and I kinda look like the odd couple. My hair is usually bright red or hot pink and I often wear bohemian style clothing. I have several visible tattoos and stretched ear lobes.

DH dresses conservatively. He's older than me, going bald and has quite the paunch.







He'd rather jump off a bridge than get a tattoo.

We drive a minivan.

Our kids look pretty normal. I've been asked if I was the babysitter or older sister while out and about with my kids.


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## rightkindofme (Apr 14, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *goldingoddess* 
I'm pretty sure we look 'crunchy,' and our house looks crunchy.

There are no paper products in our house other than toilet paper. All of our cleaning products are green. We don't have a TV. Every piece of art in my house has naked women in it.

We drive a compact car and share it between us because of our environmental consciousness. My husband has long hair down to his butt and gauged ears. I have hairy armpits and don't wear make-up. But on the other hand, DH is very high up in his company and definitely has a very professional appearance there, but we're in the bay area, so 'looks' are relative because long hair is definitely acceptable in the computer programmer world.

Your house doesn't especially hit my crunchy meter. Around here you are pretty darn normal.









I feel like my house doesn't look particularly crunchy. And then you get to my solar panels on the roof.







If someone knows what they are looking for they would see the family cloth in the bathroom.







And I lurve my minivan. We balance it out by having a Prius for the commuting car.


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## Cascadian (Jan 28, 2009)

You REALLY need a 'between option 2 and 3' option


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## Magali (Jun 8, 2007)

I cloth diaper, but we just bought an SUV. I'm all about homecooked meals, but for the time being we are drinking store bought water out of plastic bottles. I breastfed my son till almost 3 and never use reusable shopping bags. No vaccines for humans or animals in this house, but we don't recycle. We cosleep and babywear but are all about computers and good cartoons and love watching shows and playing WoW. I don't even know what we are







.


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## waiting2bemommy (Dec 2, 2007)

no, we don't look crunchy at all.

In fact, I find it pretty amusing when I bring my kids into the social services, wic, etc and we look so totally stereotypical...."young" mom, two kids in popular urban brand clothing, jordans, all that, the 3 year old is singing "pretty boy swag" under his breath, etc., except....wait a minute, is that a BOOB she's pulling out? and that weird thing she carries her baby in.....?

We are pretty "crunchy" by the standards I encounter around here: we don't vax, I attempted homebirth, bf my ds until 2 years. we babywear a LOT, cosleep, limit tv, make our own baby food, can't afford to eat organic but defintely eat non-mainstream stuff and buy local and all that, and cloth diaper.

this information usually shocks people since I look about 16 anyway and that is totally not what they are expecting.


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## CherryBombMama (Jan 25, 2010)

on the outside, we very much look not crunchy, yet not mainstream. putting a label to it, we are "rockabilly." tattoos, pomps, 40s pincurls (before my kids lol now my hair is just down w/ betty bangs)

i drive a tahoe. we dont eat organic but try for "natural" as much as possible.

our crunchiness is more hidden, but not intentionally - cloth diapers, cloth wipes, delayed/selective vax, bed sharing (w/ a toddler and a newborn) some all natural cleaners ... the more visible things would be BFing and NIP and babywearing ...


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## StoriesInTheSoil (May 8, 2008)

I think people look at me and think I'm a weirdo. I have a big pregnant belly and often a toddler hanging off of my "noobie" which he politely demands several times during each outing. My husband is a pretty clean cut working man with a baby face and he dresses what I would consider "normal." I wear wrap skirts and solid-colored tee-shirts and keen mary janes almost every day so I don't know how I dress- I describe it as "mom style."







My kid doesn't look like a hippie kid to me but other people have told me he does. He just wears solid colored shirts and plain pants and soft shoes and an amber necklace.

If someone comes into my house, they figure out pretty quickly that we're outside the mainstream as there is no TV, no visible computer (laptop hides when not in use), few plastic toys, no battery-operated toys, oh and there's that huge birth pool set up in the back room


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## lilyka (Nov 20, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *tinyactsofcharity* 
oh and there's that huge birth pool set up in the back room









yeah, thats usually a dead give away









Is a TV in the living room the norm where you live? I keep hearing people mention this like it is such a huge deal. Most people I know do not have a TV in the living room. It is in the family room, basement or in the individual bedrooms. I would not assume, just because someone does not have their TV prominently displayed in their living room that they did not have one. I would just assume it was in the TV room. My xh always insisted the TV be in the living room, exposed (at the very least I wanted it hid away in a cupboard when not in use). I was mortified to have something so tacky right there where people could see it. And that is back when I was all about the TV. And most people I know who have a computer just have a lap top and keep it put away. So the fact that people wouldn't see these things when they walk in my house wouldn't clue them into me being at all crunchy. They would just assume I was tidy and watched TV elsewhere. (hahahaha as if they would walk into my house and see anything put away...but one can dream about her ideals, right).


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## Doodlebugsmom (Aug 1, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lilyka* 
yeah, thats usually a dead give away









Is a TV in the living room the norm where you live? I keep hearing people mention this like it is such a huge deal. Most people I know do not have a TV in the living room. It is in the family room, basement or in the individual bedrooms. I would not assume, just because someone does not have their TV prominently displayed in their living room that they did not have one. I would just assume it was in the TV room. My xh always insisted the TV be in the living room, exposed (at the very least I wanted it hid away in a cupboard when not in use). I was mortified to have something so tacky right there where people could see it.

Our house, as with lots of other houses I'm familiar with, only has one living room. No family room, no basement. So, tacky as it may be, that's where our TV is. I've never really considered that anyone would think it was tacky.


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## crunchy_mommy (Mar 29, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Doodlebugsmom* 
Our house, as with lots of other houses I'm familiar with, only has one living room. No family room, no basement. So, tacky as it may be, that's where our TV is. I've never really considered that anyone would think it was tacky.











Most people I know only have one room that serves as a living room/family room/tv room... so that is where you see a TV in just about every house you walk in to. I feel like it's also a kind of status symbol (sadly)... There are those with the huge flat-panel TV's and then those like me with the decades-old thing that needs to be banged on the side a few times before it will turn on (not to mention the rabbit ears that signify we're "too poor for cable" lol... though it's more of a choice for us than a true financial move).


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## coyotemist (Aug 23, 2007)

Most of you sound so familiar, as though our homes were from the same community! But they are, the MDC community! hee hee.

Minivan driving
TV and computer using
Organic sometimes, natural and homemade almost all the time
Normal clothes, but as much cotton and wool and I can stuff everyone into
Thrift store shopping
Toilet paper using
Cloth hankies
Kitchen towels
Half store bags, half my own bags
knitting
as gentle as I can (sometimes the kids need me to be stern)
public schooling
half vaxed, half delayed vaxing
MD and ND seeing
nature loving
Tom's of Maine deodorant
shaving when I feel like it
own crest and Eco-Dent
cloth diapering
baby wearing
own a stroller too
extended breastfeeding the older 2, but when it didn't work with the baby, bottle feeding
hospital birthing (due to being high risk)
I think I have more in common with most of the people on this thread than NOT in common!







Crunchy I don't know...I think my family is quite the oxymoron!


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## blizzard_babe (Feb 14, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *AllyRae* 
I guess I don't know what "crunchy" looks like, because in central Ohio, crunchy doesn't look like the "hippy stereotype"...they just look like everyday people who just happen to do things a bit greener.









Same with college-town Central Wisconsin. It's a combination of the local "mainstream" norms being more casual, and the local "crunchy" norms trending more towards the... norm.


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## blizzard_babe (Feb 14, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *coyotemist* 
Most of you sound so familiar, as though our homes were from the same community! But they are, the MDC community! hee hee.

Minivan driving
TV and computer using
Organic sometimes, natural and homemade almost all the time
Normal clothes, but as much cotton and wool and I can stuff everyone into
Thrift store shopping
Toilet paper using
Cloth hankies
Kitchen towels
Half store bags, half my own bags
knitting
as gentle as I can (sometimes the kids need me to be stern)
public schooling
half vaxed, half delayed vaxing
MD and ND seeing
nature loving
Tom's of Maine deodorant
shaving when I feel like it
own crest and Eco-Dent
cloth diapering
baby wearing
own a stroller too
extended breastfeeding the older 2, but when it didn't work with the baby, bottle feeding
hospital birthing (due to being high risk)
I think I have more in common with most of the people on this thread than NOT in common!







Crunchy I don't know...I think my family is quite the oxymoron!

Our houses sound pretty interchangeable.

I love the "shaving when I feel like it." I'm not pro-shaving, I'm not anti-shaving... I just sometimes feel like shaving and sometimes don't.


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## thatgirliknew (Dec 1, 2009)

I live with the most un-crunchy man in the world. He let's me make whatever decisions I wish with the children (I discuss them with him but he usually just agrees anyway), but he is totally "mainstream". If it were just me and the kids, there would be only organic foods and lots of local fresh foods. We would have no TV, and a whole lot less "stuff". Plus the kids would have less toys and more "natural" play stuff. Oh, and I'd have dreads. lol.
I guess some people might notice the AP books, my wrap, cloth diapers, but most would just consider us an average family.


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## LemonPie (Sep 18, 2006)

Funny thread! I live in a fairly non-crunchy area, but once in a while I'll see someone who 'looks' crunchy and wonder if they are a fellow MDCer









I don't look very crunchy, which is probably no surprise since I'm NOT very crunchy







I'm probably crunchiest in the parenting areas--I co-sleep with my babies, EBF, babywear, do my best to parent gently, and we homeschool. I'm very pro-natural birth.

On the flip side, I color my hair, wear makeup, go for mani/pedis, etc. We vax on schedule, and we have lots of toys, ranging from playsilks to battery-operated plastic gadgets, but my kids spend a lot of time outdoors. We have A LOT of technology-- flat screen TV (in our living room--gasp!), DVR, Blu-Ray, a Wii, more than one computer. I have way too many paper products in the house, including disposable diapers (gave up cloth after my emergency c-section with #3) and flushable wipes. We eat out and eat way too much junk food, but I also cook a lot from scratch and I'm currently harboring a sourdough starter







My garden is dead because I have black thumb. We try to avoid licensed characters, but we have a few Spiderman, Mario and Hello Kitty things around here.

ETA: I have no idea why the guy with the hat is at the top of my post. When I go back in to edit, I can't find it. Weird.


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## Mom2M (Sep 23, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lilyka* 
yeah, thats usually a dead give away









Is a TV in the living room the norm where you live? I keep hearing people mention this like it is such a huge deal. Most people I know do not have a TV in the living room. It is in the family room, basement or in the individual bedrooms. I would not assume, just because someone does not have their TV prominently displayed in their living room that they did not have one. I would just assume it was in the TV room. My xh always insisted the TV be in the living room, exposed (at the very least I wanted it hid away in a cupboard when not in use). I was mortified to have something so tacky right there where people could see it. And that is back when I was all about the TV. And most people I know who have a computer just have a lap top and keep it put away. So the fact that people wouldn't see these things when they walk in my house wouldn't clue them into me being at all crunchy. They would just assume I was tidy and watched TV elsewhere. (hahahaha as if they would walk into my house and see anything put away...but one can dream about her ideals, right).

We only have 1 living room too and there is a TV but I didn't think it looked really tacky, it is fairly small and black, lol


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## kasey08 (Apr 30, 2008)

I would say we appear pretty crunchy, but I think it often gets confused for us being poor and disadvantaged. None of the usual baby gear, we cloth diaper, DD is in second-hand clothes, has messy hair, doesn't know who Dora is, etc. We love our lifestyle so much though!


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## waiting2bemommy (Dec 2, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *kasey08* 
I would say we appear pretty crunchy, but I think it often gets confused for us being poor and disadvantaged. None of the usual baby gear, we cloth diaper, DD is in second-hand clothes, has messy hair, doesn't know who Dora is, etc. We love our lifestyle so much though!

yes, I have had people tell me, "oh you're breasfeeding/cloth diapering/letting your baby sleep in the bed with you?" and then direct me to some charity organization that provides baby supplies or free shots or parenting classes. I had even had someone say, "you're still nursing your baby? go to WIC, they'll give you formula so you can quit with the breastfeeding." they don't understand these are CONSCIOUS choices that happen to come with the added benefit of being easier and cheaper.









I keep getting this vibe, at least where I live, that the same lifestyles, made in a different economic bracket, are viewed totally differently. from "earthy" and "hippie-ish" to ignorant and neglectful. but maybe i'm just sensitive to it or something...


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## Thyme Mama (Sep 27, 2010)

what a funny question!

sometimes i get the feeling that many people equate looking/dressing like a hippie with living a "crunchy" lifestyle.

as many pp's said..........that's not necessarily so!









where i live and in my social circle, there are many hippie-looking people who live a very "mainstream" lifestyle and there are many yuppie-ish looking people who live a very "mdc crunchy" lifestyle.

now if the question is "do you look like a goin-on-tour hippie?".......then i would vote yes









or if the question is "do you fit the hippie-look stereotype that could be the definition of crunch in the opinion of some mdc'ers?"..........then i would also vote yes


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## east carolina (Apr 5, 2006)

I think our family looked crunchier when DS was little, because I openly breastfed him in public until he was 5, I had a natural birth in a birth center, I wore him until he was 2 and DH wore him until he was 3, he was cloth diped and we frequently traveled with cloth as well. He had mostly wooden toys and ate mostly organic and homemade baby food. We stopped vaccinating once we did our research, but we're not super outspoken about it.

As he got older, he got more plastic toys, I allowed him some processed sugary sweets every once in a while, he watches alot of shows and movies on the computer, he goes to preschool (no plans to homeschool, though both DH and I have decided that we will if school isn't working for him, so far he loves it). In terms of discipline, we're very GD about alot if stuff, but strict about other stuff and our household can be very loud sometimes with power struggles and all that. But this is something that I care very much about and I want to be the best and gentlest mom I can be.

Our home looks pretty average, I can't really think of anything "crunchy" or "non-crunchy" about it. Wooden floors, and wooden furniture, but we don't have curtains and all of our bookshelves are Ikea.

We don't dress crunchy, all of us have very modern style jeans and a t-shirt, DH and DS wear khakis, I've got some skinny pants and leggings, some more gothy-looking stuff, some high heels, I paint my finger nails and wear make-up on occasion, but I don't shave, I guess that's on the crunchy end of the spectrum.

We also listen to alot of rap, rock n' roll of the noisier persuasion, punk, post-punk, indie, we have no new wave or meditation music, no wind chimes or what have you.

Alot of the really crunchy people where I live want to live really apart from mainstream society -- they either homeschool or send their kids to Waldorf. They allow no sugar, are often vegetarian, they all homebirth, wear their babies, breastfeed for at least 2 years, don't vax, etc. I don't see society as divided like that and I don't want my friends or my kid's friends to be all the same. We mix and match depending on what works and what feels good for us.


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## Kelly1101 (Oct 9, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *LemonPie* 
Funny thread! I live in a fairly non-crunchy area, but once in a while I'll see someone who 'looks' crunchy and wonder if they are a fellow MDCer









Hahaha, me too! I saw a woman in the grocery store with a BEAUTIFUL ring sling and almost went up to her but I'm too shy









Quote:


Originally Posted by *waiting2bemommy* 
yes, I have had people tell me, "oh you're breasfeeding/cloth diapering/letting your baby sleep in the bed with you?" and then direct me to some charity organization that provides baby supplies or free shots or parenting classes. I had even had someone say, "you're still nursing your baby? go to WIC, they'll give you formula so you can quit with the breastfeeding." they don't understand these are CONSCIOUS choices that happen to come with the added benefit of being easier and cheaper.









I keep getting this vibe, at least where I live, that the same lifestyles, made in a different economic bracket, are viewed totally differently. from "earthy" and "hippie-ish" to ignorant and neglectful. but maybe i'm just sensitive to it or something...

Hahaha, well, in my case it's almost true... we don't have a lot of "baby gear", cloth diaper, breastfeed, make food from scratch, SAHM, and wear cheap clothes because we ARE kind of poor and disadvantaged









There are other reasons, of course, although not necessarily the same reasons as other people... but like with CD... the environment is kind of third behind reason 1) CHEAP and reason 2) more comfy for the baby.

I had to laugh about the WIC comment... tell them that WIC gives actual FOOD to breastfeeding mothers because they don't have to buy formula.


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## crunchy_mommy (Mar 29, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *waiting2bemommy* 
yes, I have had people tell me, "oh you're breasfeeding/cloth diapering/letting your baby sleep in the bed with you?" and then direct me to some charity organization that provides baby supplies or free shots or parenting classes. I had even had someone say, "you're still nursing your baby? go to WIC, they'll give you formula so you can quit with the breastfeeding." they don't understand these are CONSCIOUS choices that happen to come with the added benefit of being easier and cheaper.









I keep getting this vibe, at least where I live, that the same lifestyles, made in a different economic bracket, are viewed totally differently. from "earthy" and "hippie-ish" to ignorant and neglectful. but maybe i'm just sensitive to it or something...

No, I totally get that feeling too! We were going for a walk (with DS in my homemade $5 wrap) and some lady looked at him, astounded, then asked (with a tinge of pity in her voice) "Don't you have a stroller?" -- I've gotten asked this multiple times. Even the non-baby choices we've made -- no cable, for example -- everyone is always trying to tell us how we can get cheaper cable through XYZ company or that Netflix is only $10, they can't fathom that we've CHOSEN not to have cable.

Also many of the "crunchy" moms in our area are well-off & so 'crunchy' for them is shopping at the expensive all-natural baby store & signing their kids up for certain 'crunchy' classes & private schools & feeding their kids certain organic brands... It seems like that kind of crunchy is viewed very differently than less-well-off crunchy which, yes, people seem to think is almost neglectful...


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## waiting2bemommy (Dec 2, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *crunchy_mommy* 
No, I totally get that feeling too! We were going for a walk (with DS in my homemade $5 wrap) and some lady looked at him, astounded, then asked (with a tinge of pity in her voice) "Don't you have a stroller?" -- I've gotten asked this multiple times. Even the non-baby choices we've made -- no cable, for example -- everyone is always trying to tell us how we can get cheaper cable through XYZ company or that Netflix is only $10, they can't fathom that we've CHOSEN not to have cable.

Also many of the "crunchy" moms in our area are well-off & so 'crunchy' for them is shopping at the expensive all-natural baby store & signing their kids up for certain 'crunchy' classes & private schools & feeding their kids certain organic brands... It seems like that kind of crunchy is viewed very differently than less-well-off crunchy which, yes, people seem to think is almost neglectful...

yes, you explained it better than I could! The 'crunchy" families here it seems kind of like a status thing. the babywearing is a pricey wrap or carrier from same boutique...mine is a fairly ugly ring sling from the thrift store and 6 yards of remnant fabric from joannes for a wrap. people always think I'm using a bedsheet to "tie up the baby" which evokes a lot of sympathy. either that or they ask which foreign country i'm from.


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## DaughterOfKali (Jul 15, 2007)

When we (me, especially) are out in public, it shows. The clothes I wear and the recycled car (heh heh) give a major clue.

I use 'gentle' or natural cleaning supplies at home so that may give a hint.

I think I look more crunchy than I am.


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## lilyka (Nov 20, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Mom2M* 
We only have 1 living room too and there is a TV but I didn't think it looked really tacky, it is fairly small and black, lol

I don't think TVs in general look tacky (although it is sure not pretty) but you should have seen the monster (reads status symbol) my xh plopped down in our living room. which kept the doors on the cupboard from closing. (even though our TV has always been in the living room I kept it in a cabinet with doors so I could put it away when we were not using it). I promptly sold both TV and cabinet when we got divorced.

I generally consider such displays tacky, not so much what a person is displaying.


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## fyrwmn (Jan 5, 2009)

i don't think we come off as looking overly crunchy, but i also never thought of some of the things we do as "crunchy". we garden, compost, and can food...that's what my grandmother and mother did growing up so i guess i just figured it to be more of as mainstream thing. we raise pigs for food with friends of ours, and the guys do all the slaughtering/smoking/etc that goes with it. as for the house itself, there is a mix of plastic and wooden toys. the kids have a play kitchen and megablocks/legos, but i see both as fairly open ended. not only do we have a bunch of carriers, dh has his own meitai (that he actually uses, had to have extra long straps for him so that's why we don't share that), but the kids have carriers for their dolls too. ds is just as in love with the dolls, dress up clothes, etc as dd is. we erf and most of our friends think we're overly paranoid for doing so. buuuuut....we're both firefighter/emts, so we tend to be more cautious than alot of our friends anyways because we see too much of the 'worst case scenerio'. we do some organic, alot of home cooked from scratch, and a fair mix of "normal" food. we love the local farms for eggs and fresh veggies in the summer. both kids have their own room, and ds has a crib that he didn't even nap in till almost 10mo when he refused to co-sleep anymore. we en, but ds doesn't usually ask to nurse in public, and fully anticipate tandem nursing when due any day now babe gets here. the whole family is a jeans and t-shirt type, but alot of it comes from the second hand store or bought on clearance a season ahead and then gets passed thru the kids. we cloth diaper and are in the process of switching to cloth wipes. we have a clothes line outside (as well as a dryer) but i always thought of that as a bonus to getting fresh smelling lined dried clothes. we delay/selective vax, but alot of people don't realize that. we planned to homebirth this time, but cost won out and we're having a hospital birth again







. i wish i wasn't too chicken to uc.


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