# my abortion



## sunnymama (Jul 15, 2003)

I had an abortion on June 20th. I cannot describe the sorrow. I am having terrible dreams about women killing their children and myslef being in awful situations and not being able to find help. I wanted the baby but my partner didn't. I have a daughter who is almost eight and I raised her alone. I didn't want to do that again. Now I see that doing it again alone would have been better than living through this. How do I go on without tormenting myself? I don't know what to do.


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## mamabutterfly (Jun 23, 2002)

{{{{{ sunnymama }}}}}

I am so sorry for your loss.

Do you have someone to talk with? (counselor, etc?)


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## Colorful~Mama (Feb 20, 2003)

i'm so sorry...
and i agree that seeing a therapist really would help - you'll need to grieve the loss and forgive yourself - and support is so important to help get you thru this.

will keep you in our thoughts and prayers


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## sunnymama (Jul 15, 2003)

Yes, I am looking into therapy. Thank you for responding. I want to fix this and go on.


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## 1jooj (Apr 8, 2002)

Sorry for your loss. Give yourself a lot of time, and share your feelings with those you think may understand. Write it down, sort it out, and be gentle with yourself.


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## JessicaS (Nov 18, 2001)

I am so sorry for what you are going through. I think counseling will really help you a great deal.


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## carmen veranda (Jan 27, 2003)

My heart goes out to you. Your child will always be a part of your life. But the pain will diminish. You will feel this less acutely as time goes on. I imagine feelings of guilt and shame may be present too? You did the thing you thought was best at the time. You are only human. You know how hard it is being alone with children to raise. Forgive yourself. Grieve as hard and as long as you need to. You have suffer a huge loss. It does not make it any easier to bear because you chose it. You still have the right to grieve. I am so sorry.
Take care of yourself and your child. You did what you felt to be best for your family. This does not make you any less of a mamma...


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## jannan (Oct 30, 2002)

i feel your pain and your loss. the story was the same with me . I wanted the baby , My partner did not. so i had a 2nd tri-mester abortion. afterward i too could n't stop feeling or thinking about the baby. You need to remind yourself you did the right thing. there is a post abortion support group i know of called www.exhale.org. they helpped me.


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## jannan (Oct 30, 2002)

I've made an error. that is not what it is called but i will find out and post


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## Alenushka (Jul 27, 2002)

I think it is important not o have regerets because regrets eat you away and make you weak and you in tunr make life hard for others. og to a therapist. You need to be stong for yourslef and your daughter.
You know how hard it is to be a sinlge mom but you ahve no idea how ahrd it si with 2. My mom was single mother of 2 when she got pregnant with third and had na abortion. she felt bad abou it but I thank her for it when I was 16. Our life was so very ahrd and we were so poor ....I simply do not see what would ahve happend to us if we has anothe child in the family. My moms health was not the best either. I think she owuld have died form eaustiona nd then where would we be?
Body is just a body nad soul find another place. hwen I was 16 I drmed of my younger sister......We had a facinating conversationa nd she told me she was not mad at mom, and that in fact she found a good home in Germany adn that someday we will be born as sisters again
Be good to yourself. Saty away form men for ano, for the predetaros come out of the woods when we are sad. Be good to yourself and your child and see a therapist
Hugs


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## jannan (Oct 30, 2002)

I,too , have had dreams about the babies I've aborted. I hope they've gone to a woman who needs them


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## Ms. Mom (Nov 18, 2001)

sunnymama, I cannot imagine what you're going through. We all make decisions in our lives that we later regret. But, please keep in mind that you made the 'best' decision for you 'at the time'.

Therepy would be helpful also if you have some friends to reach out to - please do so! You cannot go back now, only forward. In any greif process, we go through many stages. It sounds like you're in a state of disbeleife right now. Allow yourself the time you need to greive. Greife is patient and will wait for you if you put it aside.

Yes, you're entitled to your greif. This was a very significant loss in your life







. Please make sure you're taking care of yourself.


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