# Why did you have a hospital birth?



## Honey693 (May 5, 2008)

For those of you that had a hospital birth for at least one of your kids why did you choose that instead of a homebirth? I'm having a hospital birth for my first and it's for a number of reasons. My husband is not comfortable with home birth and while I'm the one going through labor I refuse to just push his feelings and concerns aside. To me, his fears aren't really justified, but I understand them. Also I know logically my body is built to have babies, but emotionally I'm not at the point where I can shove all the what ifs away and say and feel mostly certain that my body really can do this. Lastly I've heard really good things about the hospital from doulas and their website shows at least some consideration for mothers. They encourage rooming in, waiting at least an hour for tests unless something else is wrong, all the rooms have jacuzzi tubs for water laboring, etc.


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## gcgirl (Apr 3, 2007)

I felt similarly to you - in theory I understand my body should work, but I get really hung up on what-ifs. Plus, I knew I'd relax better in the hospital than at home (odd but true). And I was right. My experience was pretty good overall, though. Nobody tried to push me into epidurals or pain meds or anything, and the staff on that night were really great.

It ultimately comes down to a personal decision. I hope your birth experience is great no matter where you are.


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## jocelyndale (Aug 28, 2006)

As sad as it is to say, I would not be comfortable giving birth in my current home. It's just not yet "cozy". The energy is off or something. Also, I wasn't sure if I'd have bleeding issues.

I won't rule homebirth out for the future. I now know that I could certainly do it safely. I had a good hospital experience (natural, loved ones with me), but I couldn't wait to leave and get home to my own bed and kitchen.


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## Belle (Feb 6, 2005)

I had a hospital birth the first time around because I didn't even really know that homebirth was a viable option. I'd never really given it a thought. After my hospital birth I was sure I wanted something else next time.

When next time came I planned for a home birth. Ended up with a m/c that transfered to the hospital. My hospital experience really sucked this time. I was more certain I wanted a baby at home.

HB finally happened for the next pregnancy. I can't imagine going to the hospital for giving birth now that I've HBed.


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## Redifer (Nov 25, 2006)

I wanted homebirths with both, but we lived with other people at the time of each birth, so the hospital it was.

DD1 was my mother. She and her boyfriend kinda... invited themselves.. to move in with us. That was fun.

DD2, we were living in DH's grandmother's basement, because she needed help after having a minor stroke. We moved in to help her around the house, manage her diabetes, and make sure someone was always home with her and able to take her to her appointments. And she was deadset against homebirth.

So, I got screwed both times.


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## newmama8824 (Jul 8, 2007)

Because I found a wonderful midwife and she only delivered at this one hospital, which was a great hospital as well. My birth went just as I had planned. Nothing like the stereotypical bossy nurses barging in left and right, or monitoring or being told when to push. I just kinda did my own thing... Alone in my room with my doula and myself. It was more than I could have imagined.


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## Novella (Nov 8, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Crystal_R* 
For those of you that had a hospital birth for at least one of your kids why did you choose that instead of a homebirth? I'm having a hospital birth for my first and it's for a number of reasons. My husband is not comfortable with home birth and while I'm the one going through labor I refuse to just push his feelings and concerns aside. To me, his fears aren't really justified, but I understand them. Also I know logically my body is built to have babies, but emotionally I'm not at the point where I can shove all the what ifs away and say and feel mostly certain that my body really can do this. Lastly I've heard really good things about the hospital from doulas and their website shows at least some consideration for mothers. They encourage rooming in, waiting at least an hour for tests unless something else is wrong, all the rooms have jacuzzi tubs for water laboring, etc.

Here's my list:

Birth #1
Liked the idea of homebirth with midwife, but thought that it was "safer" in a hospital and not sure what I might "need" even though I very much wanted an intervention-free birth. Lots of first-timer uncertainties about what actually goes down (no pun intended).

Birth #2
Tried to get a midwife in my rural home. Found out the new provincial funding of midwives resulted in them working only within 30 minutes of an obstetrical facility (Oh, the faith! Oh, the choice!). Had a laid back family doctor to attend the birth and knew him from first birth. Was preparing to pack up house and move overseas for at least a year right after the birth, so didn't really have the time/facilities for a homebirth. Didn't think there was any point to having a midwife in a hospital that would be a much further drive.

Birth #3
Got lazy, basically. Knew I couldn't get a midwife at home. Hadn't yet read much about unassisted birth. (And with each birth, the general mild disgust my husband and I now have for the medical profession grew and grew).

Birth #4 & #5
Heart-wrenching. So very, VERY close to having an "unassisted" home birth. While not wanting a professional on the scene, DH and I did think it would be wise to have a third adult present and we didn't have anyone willing to do this. Twin B was double footling breech, which seemed to us to be as much an indication for staying away from doctors than running to them. Went with hospital due to lack of someone to help us at home. If this pregnancy had been a singleton, it *definitely* would have been a UC.


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## Veritaserum (Apr 24, 2004)

Because I didn't know better.









At the time I had my hospital birth I thought only hippies or people with a death wish chose to give birth at home because "everybody knows" hospitals are the safest place to have a baby.









After a really crappy, unsafe birth I actually did some research. Initially dh was NOT comfortable with home birth. I simply continued to educate him. Eventually he realized it was wrong of him to ask me to have a hospital birth I felt to be unsafe and potentially violating and since home birth IS safe he should support me in what I wanted to do.


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## philomom (Sep 12, 2004)

My kids are 12 and 14. I thought I was being hugely progressive to have a midwife and a natural childbirth. I thought everyone gave birth at the hospital.... I was thirty years old before I met anyone who hadn't birthed that way.









We did Bradley, we had amazing natural and hands-off births at the hospital. Truly, the most awesome within the hospital experiences you can imagine. I was in complete control. I was in charge of my own labor. I got in the pushing position I wanted to be in. I had NOTHING done without my consent.








Within minutes of each birth, I was up, rinsed off and back in my own clean gown and finding yummy food to eat, while trying to nurse the newborn and calling our mothers! The nurses were all so impressed. I was back in my own home within 24 hours with no complications of any kind.


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## hellyaellen (Nov 8, 2005)

with #1 none of the reading i did (which was just the basic stuff everybody reads i guess - what to expect, and the pregnancy magazines at the drs office so not much) anyway none of the reading gave me any knowledge of anything different

whith #2 even though i read alot more (because the experience with an epidural and having a cathter led me to learn more about natural birth) i still didn't learn a whole lot about homebirth. and the midwife i found was a cnm who only did hospital deliveries......

when we have #3 (soon i hope) i'll be having either a homebirth or going to a free standing birth center the midwive i'll be seeing are far enough away that i'm wanting to be prepared to uc if i feel like i want to.....


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## Kelly Jene (Jun 8, 2008)

With #1, I was clueless. (I was 19) I thought hospitals were it as far as choices go. That and I was dying for that epideral. Boy was that a joke.

With #2, I had planned an unmedicated, midwife hospital birth. Unfortunately, I was in a car wreck which injured my back to the point where I had to be in the hospital.

With my next baby I plan a midwife/birth center birth. I would love to in my home, but it's just not logical or comfortable enough.

Make the decision that's right for YOU!!


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## UrbanCrunchyMama (Aug 7, 2007)

While I was onboard with natural childbirth and aware of how a hospital setting might impede labor and/or interfere with the birth process, I still wasn't "there" yet with homebirth. I just didn't have that extra few ounces of faith in myself because it was unknown territory. That, and my husband was totally wigged out by the thought of it.

Labor progressed WAY faster and more easily than I could have ever anticipated. I was ready to push in our bathroom after 4 1/2 hours of labor, but (following through with our plan) we jumped into the car and headed to the hospital.

Nothing ultra traumatic happened. We have healthy daughter, but I wish her entry into this world was much more gentle.

I'd like to stay at home next time, and I've already given my husband fair "warning", so he can prepare himself for it.


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## Honey693 (May 5, 2008)

It makes me feel so much better to know that there are some people who just didn't feel "there" about having a home birth with number one. I was starting to feel bad b/c all the threads asking about how to have a natural hospital birth say stay home. I was thinking, but I wouldn't feel comfortable at home right now.


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## lachingona1 (May 16, 2007)

I didn't think I had that choice with my first....I have no idea why.


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## MrsAprilMay (Jul 7, 2007)

With my first, I didn't know people could have homebirths. (You kinda have to go underground in this state to find HBMWs anyway.)

With my second we planned a HB, but there was a lot of stuff that got in our way.


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## emmaegbert (Sep 14, 2004)

My health insurance covers 100% of the hospital birth center (with midwives attending), and as far as I can tell nothing for home birth... and this is a not insignificant detail for my family.

That said, I had a good experience in the hospital with a midwife. But I also didn't know anyone who had done a home birth, and since then I've met quite a few, and it seems like its great-- especially for the older kids (not to have mom and dad leave them behind at this exciting/momentous moment-- though the birth center welcomes older siblings, grandparents, etc)

I will look into homebirth more next time (if/when there is a next time) but if I can't figure out a way to have insurance cover it, I will probably go back to the same birth center.


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## JBaxter (May 1, 2005)

With my first 2 I didnt know there was a choice but am glad i did. I bleed alot after delivery and they watch me pretty close. I also have very long labors and typically get no sleep for 2 days so I have had epidurals. "I" am more comfortable with an OB in a hospital. They are great and have never even blinked when I wanted or didnt want todo something.

IF I didnt have a history of bleeding so much after birth and had labors 18hrs or shorter I would probably do a home birth


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## Magali (Jun 8, 2007)

I really didn't know about the option of homebirth. I know better now.


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## mrs_mandolini (Feb 23, 2007)

Because the baby came at 32 weeks.


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## felix23 (Nov 7, 2006)

I'm not comfortable giving birth at home. The hospital birth center is way more relaxing and calm then my house. I wanted to have the option of pain relief if I need it. I live about 30 minutes away from a good hospital if there was an emergency.


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## DoomaYula (Aug 22, 2006)

I had twins with Twin-to-Twin Transfusion Syndrome, and I felt safest being with a zillion mfms and perinates. The babies also came at 34w and needed a week in the NICU. However, it was a lovely vaginal birth.

With my second birth, I chose a birth center within a hospital. I didn't like that at ALL! It was basically the same as being in a hospital, imo. Still had to deal with the interventions and fighting people off and such.

With my third birth, I chose to be at home. I had a wonderful birth. Afterwards, however, I did transfer for a pph and retained placenta. But the hospital treated me so badly! Even with my history of a pph, I will have my next baby at home, without a doubt. My dh is totally on-board. He thought our hb was fantastic.


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## Patchfire (Dec 11, 2001)

My first was born in a hospital. I would've done a birth center had that been available within, oh, 300 miles or so. But why not at home?

We lived in a 7th floor apartment, in married student housing, and the fire alarm didn't work reliably. We had times that the FD would show up at our building, and no alarms would have gone off. As a result, any time we heard sirens, we spent time 'on edge' and waiting to see where they would go, if they would come closer, etc... as you can imagine, v. high anxiety. We lived in downtown, near the freeway... there was no way we could go more than an hour or two usually without hearing something.

I knew enough about myself and the physiology of labor to know that I would tense up and stop every time I heard a siren. Leaving the apartment was, unfortunately, the only way to go, and we really couldn't afford to move elsewhere at the time.

As hospital births go, it went fairly well.


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## BetsyS (Nov 8, 2004)

In my state, only non-CNMs attend homebirths. My state doesn't recognize midwives that aren't CNMs. Because of this, insurance does not pay for any non-CNM deliveries, thus they don't pay for homebirths. And like a PP said, that's not insignificant for my family.

Also, because of that gray legality of the provider at a homebirth (it's perfectly legal for mom to homebirth, just not so legal to have a provider there with you), we decided that we are too much rule followers to have a home birth in this state.


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## cappuccinosmom (Dec 28, 2003)

I didn't know there was any other option with my first.

With my second and third babies, I intended to use the birth center, but they risked me out in the end and my option was UC or hospital. And I was just not in a place where I could do UC. That was partially emotional, and partially the fact that we share a wall with another family and I felt like I coudl be *less* inhibited at a hospital than knowing two guys across the wall must be wondering what the heck was going on.


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## AmyLaz (Aug 30, 2006)

Because that was and is where I feel most comfortable. It's a very personal decision. Do what is right for you


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## accountclosed3 (Jun 13, 2006)

i think that if you have any fears, concerns, or doubts about HB that can't be worked through before birthing, then a BC or hospital is a good alternative.

what is most important is that the mother feels comfortable with her decision and safe where she is giving birth.


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## Jannah6 (Aug 29, 2007)

I've always been afraid that something would go wrong. I was even too afraid to have a birthing center birth.


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## ShadowMoon (Oct 18, 2006)

I had a hospital birth because I found out I was pregnant very late in the game, was worried that my baby might be at risk because of that (he wasn't), didn't have the proper time to plan, and was determined to get the birth experience I wanted hospital or no hospital (I tend to be stubborn like that). My hospital experience was great. If (big IF there hehe) I decide to have another, a homebirth is what I would do. But I do not regret my hospital birth one bit.


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## Eman'smom (Mar 19, 2002)

With our first two we lived 80+ miles away from the hospital, and was just a distance we weren't comfortable with. That said we had an amazing hospital midwife and experiences.

With number 3 we lived closer to the hospital in case of transfer. I can't believe how wonderful homebirth is and I finally understand what everyone raves about.


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## lyterae (Jul 10, 2005)

We had a hospital birth with a CNM for our daughter. My husband was very uncomfortable with a homebirth at the time and so I found a midwife that I loved. In the long-run... I was stressed out and ended up with a scheduled induction (the OB she practices under "decided" on it because of rising BP and excess amniotic fluid..) I didn't realize at the time that I could have just refused, instead I ended up getting my membranes stripped and taking castor oil in hopes of getting labor started before my induction. I labored and pushed w/out drugs but ended with a c-section due to presentation (right occiput transverse).

Our next child is going to be a HBAC (hopefully!) and a water birth.


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## BookishVonLiberal (Feb 24, 2007)

Because my insurance covered it and not homebirth.


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## grniys (Aug 22, 2006)

Honestly, neither my husband nor I were comfortable with homebirth and I don't think my insurance would cover it. I had a wonderful hospital birth. I'm debating between a hospital birth and a birthing center this time. It'll take me some time to decide. I think a homebirth can be a wonderful thing... it's just not for me.

ETA: I'm one of those people that ALWAYS worries about the worst possible situation and such, and tend to be very tense and stressed. I'm just less worried at the hospital.


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## kwilki8 (May 24, 2005)

With my first, I just assumed that everyone went to the hospital. It's very difficult to find a hb midwife here. And I honestly think I would have been scared to birth at home just because I didn't know what to expect. As it turned out, I would have ended up in the hospital anyway as I developed pre-eclampsia and needed to be induced.

This time I had several complications arise early on that ensured no midwife would take me. I had already been seeing my ob for infertility treatment and found him to be very supportive of my desire for a natural birth, so it was a very easy decision to birth at the hospital, knowing that I would eventually risk out of a hb anyway.


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## ~sweet pea~ (Aug 8, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *gcgirl* 
I felt similarly to you - in theory I understand my body should work, but I get really hung up on what-ifs. *Plus, I knew I'd relax better in the hospital than at home (odd but true).* And I was right. My experience was pretty good overall, though. Nobody tried to push me into epidurals or pain meds or anything, and the staff on that night were really great.

It ultimately comes down to a personal decision. I hope your birth experience is great no matter where you are.









: I totally get this. Maybe it's my inner diva. In the interest of being completely honest, I'll risk being asked to turn in my MDC membership for lack of crunchiness commitment. I think you have to _really love_ the idea of giving birth at home or _really hate_ hospitals. I don't fall into either category and truthfully, the idea of giving birth _at my house_ just isn't appealing to me. I'd prefer the hospital shower to my own shower (where the hot water runs out after fifteen minutes), and the hospital jacuzzi to my 1960s tiny tub or a kiddie pool. Yes, call me a prima donna, but if I'm going to drip, poop, bleed, or gush in any significant quantities, I'd rather it be on hospital linens and linoleum, not my own sheets (and mattress pad cover, and mattress pad) and hardwood floors. For me, babymoon begins with _someone else_ handling this aspect of clean-up because I don't find it romantic at all.


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## Daffodil (Aug 30, 2003)

With my first, I never really considered any other option. If I had, I'm sure I would still have chosen the hospital because it seemed safest.

With my second, I just didn't see any advantage to being at home. Having to deal with guests in my house at the same time I was giving birth didn't sound very relaxing to me. I didn't want to have to think about whether the house was clean enough for the midwife, or whether we had all the supplies we needed. Our local hospital is really small and relaxed, and most people don't get epidurals, and I knew I'd be just as content there as I would be at home. When I'm in pain, it's not like I really care about my surroundings anyway; I'm just focused on what's going on inside.


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## UnassistedMomma (Jan 24, 2006)

With #1, I was 19, it was pre-internet days and I really had no idea that it was an option. When I went into labor I settled into a LazyBoy and had to literally be forced to the hospital though. I wanted to stay right where I was.

By the time I was expecting #2, I knew about midwives and after wanting to stay home so badly with #1 even though I didn't know it was an option, I hired a midwife. Unfortunately my water broke at 34 weeks and I was transferred.

#3 I was in a new state, and where we lived, the homebirth midwives were too far away - 1.5 hours. I thought that a hospital midwife would be a happy medium but I was so wrong. It worked out ok, but only because my midwife was away and the on call OB was more of a midwife than my midwife, ironically enough!

#4, I had just lost my job 2 weeks before finding out I was pregnant, the home birth midwives were still nearly 2 hours away, and we had no insurance, no money, etc. I started googling about the internet (by now, there WAS an internet, where the really wasn't with the first 3) and stumbled across some UC sites. A light bulb went off in my head and it made perfect sense to me. I wasn't willing to go to a hospital this time AGAIN anyway and had always been so disappointed at not being able to stay home, so I was thrilled. We had an awesome UC.

Pregnant with #5 now and planning another UC. Unless something changes to give me reason to need professional assistance, I will never go near a hospital again for birth.


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## njbeachgirl (Oct 8, 2006)

Crystal, I could have written your post when I was pregnant with my first baby. Those were my reasons for choosing a hospital birth. In addition I was under the impression that hospital birth was safer (being low risk and healthy, it is not). Also, our insurance covered it 100%.

Despite the best laid birth plans, a great doula, and using a midwife instead of an OB my birth turned out to be more interventive than I desired. Still vaginal, no episiotomy/vaccum/forceps etc, but not the 100% natural experience I hoped for.

I learned that I do not labor and birth well around strangers, in a strange environment. So this time around, I will birth at home.

If I could go back in time, I would have planned a homebirth for #1. But that may not be the right choice for you. You need to read, read, read and find out what your heart truly desires. Really consider how labor and birth will play out in home vs. the hospital.

As far as DH I don't think you should put his feelings aside totally, but if you end up feeling strongly about homebirth, talking to some midwives and educating him with all the facts, will probably make him feel better about it. I understand that he should have a say but ultimately the decision is yours since you will be the one giving birth, and your body needs safety and comfort to do so.

The bottom line is, you need to birth where YOU will be most comfortable- for some it's in a hospital and for some it's at home. I hope you have a great birth no matter where it is!


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## IntoTheRoseGarden (Aug 5, 2003)

With my first, I just didn't know better. I had no idea that people still had babies at home. My home at the time would not have been appropriate anyway. I lived with a roommate and she often had people over. I didn't even really feel "safe" to labor there, We ended up going and walking around the mall while I was in early labor for that reason. I considered a birth center, but I was honestly not that confident in my ability to forgo pain medication. I had done some reading and knew what I wanted. I thought my wishes would be accomodated at the hospital.







That did not happen in the least, and I really feel that had I chosen the birth center I could have avoided my c-section. Live and learn, I guess.

With #2, the only local birth center was ruled out because they VBAC was not an option there. We wanted a home birth, but the cost was truly prohibitive. Insurance covered the hospital. Looking back, I wish we had done whatever necessary to make the home birth happen. I did get my VBAC, though!


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## ferretbees (Feb 4, 2008)

I didn't know that homebirth was an option where I live, as my insurance only covers OB or CNM managed birth in a hospital or birth center.

My experience in the hospital and subsequent education has led me to plan a homebirth with a CPM for our next birth. However, this is my decision and I would never, ever place judgment on any mother who feels more comfortable with a hospital birth. I cannot relax in a hospital with people I don't know during one of the most vulnerable experiences of my life. ALL women deserve better, more personal treatment than what we receive in conventional care. It's unfortunately so rare where I live.


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## gracequinn (Jun 5, 2005)

i couldn't afford a homebirth the first time around but i don't think thats what you are looking for..i didn't choose to hospital birth so i probably shouldn't even respond here

the second and third i was home


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## polishprinsezz (Dec 31, 2006)

my last birth at the hospital was the best exerience anyone could ask for. i was only there for 1 1/2 hrs before i delivered. my midwife did not make me lay in bed. she wouldnt have been able to get me to lay down anyhow. no iv no meds no stitches. i didnt have someone checking me telling "ok, its time to push" i just stood next to the bed and pushed my baby out. i knew i couldnt relax at home caring for my toddler,looking at my messy house, trying to figure out what was for dinner.i'm happy for the waymy experience turned out.


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## Qestia (Sep 26, 2005)

For DS, I couldn't get a straight answer from my crappy insurance company about whether they would cover the birth center or not, but he came at 35 wks, so it was a moot point anyway.

My labor was so incredibly painful, and my experience with the hospital staff, stay, and birth/recovery/epidural was so positive, that I'm definitely planning on doing it at the hospital again. I had a very positive hospital birth and am very happy with the outcome. I feel thankful that I have access, in this city, to top notch medical facilities. I'll turn in _my_ MDC membership now if needed when I say I'm also really _really_ thankful I had access to the epidural, which, while I was well educated on the risks, was perfect in my experience. No pain, quick recovery, no headache/nausea, I could feel when to push. I look forward to getting one again, if necessary and timely, though I'm also doing hypnobabies too.


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## Romana (Mar 3, 2006)

I'm considering a hospital birth after my second extremely painful birth (and first homebirth) so that I'll have access to an epidural if I want one. It's either that or no more kids, and we really want more kids.

If the epidural doesn't work and the birth is as painful as the last one, there won't be any more kids. I hate natural childbirth.


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## JesseMomme (Apr 6, 2002)

With my first one, I hadn't even heard that some (well, a few) people homebirthed. I thought you just went to the hospital. For everything I managed to get my hands on and read, I was pretty clueless.

Soon after that birth, I became good friends with a mom who went on to have a HBAC, about a month before I became pregnant again. To my credit, lol, I was about the only one besides her midwives who really encouraged her and told her she could do it while she was pregnant. I was amazed, and that's the story of how homebirth initially landed on my radar.

With ds2, they ruled me out of getting to use the in-hopsital birth center for no good reason at about 32 weeks, and I eventually wanted to UC. I made the mistake of telling the Dr's this when I didn't want to see them anymore. It was further complicated living right next to my mom who worked with these Dr's daily. I was badgered from every angle until I finally agreed to "go along" with them the rest of the pregnancy, for the sake of some peace. Only a few weeks later I had no fight left in me and they pressure/scared me into an induction at 39 weeks right then and there at my last appt.


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## KD's Momma (Oct 24, 2004)

I felt alot like you for the two hosp births that I had. I was attended by midwives at both so I didn't feel the pressure for unnessesary interventions. Also, my first birth was in virginia where midwives were not allowed to attend homebirths and I wasn't really up for a free birth with my first one, let alone my dh. I have the same feelings as you about the abilities of my body but dh has many ifs. He is an amazing man and would never in a million years MAKE or FORCE me to do a single thing, no matter what it was, and so I feel I owe him that same respect here. We have had wonderful experiences at both births, we came in, quickly delivered, refused nursery care, and left a few hours after delivering. Honestly, I would change a thing about my past births.


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## mom2reenie (Nov 14, 2006)

I had a homebirth with DD and it was an amazing experience!

With ds our only option was UC or black market midwifery and I wasn't comfortable with either. DD got stuck and went into fetal distress (I was the second patient in 20 years that the doctor did an episiotomy for) and I wanted someone there in case DS also got stuck. I had a midwife and my hospital experience was also amazing.

I would still love to have a homebirth, but this baby will be born at the same hospital as DS with a doctor attending (midwife got a new job elsewhere).


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## bright-midnight (Mar 26, 2007)

I have a few reasons, but mostly I could not find a midwife that did homebirths in my area. I started out with a CNM for prenantal care, but then the hospital changed their policies and no longer allowed them to deliver babies there anymore. I would have switched to a different hospital, but this one was already 40-ish minutes away from my home. I had also already paid in advance for my prenantal care and what was supposed to be a vaginal delivery since I didn't have insurance until later on in the pregnancy.


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## SeekingSerenity (Aug 6, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *~sweet pea~* 







: I totally get this. Maybe it's my inner diva. In the interest of being completely honest, I'll risk being asked to turn in my MDC membership for lack of crunchiness commitment. I think you have to _really love_ the idea of giving birth at home or _really hate_ hospitals. I don't fall into either category and truthfully, the idea of giving birth _at my house_ just isn't appealing to me...


Quote:


Originally Posted by *Qestia* 
I'll turn in _my_ MDC membership now if needed when I say I'm also really _really_ thankful I had access to the epidural, which, while I was well educated on the risks, was perfect in my experience. No pain, quick recovery, no headache/nausea, I could feel when to push. I look forward to getting one again, if necessary and timely, though I'm also doing hypnobabies too.

Nah, MDC isn't ALL about HBs and UCs and stuff!







I think the spirit of this community is about respecting ourselves and our bodies and knowing what's right for US. We're educated and wise women who are not afraid to stand up for what we want and need. And if that means we have made the choice to have a hospital birth, or an epidural, or a UC waterbirth, whatever we choose should be what's right for us and not just what the crowd mentality leads us to believe.

I think it's awesome that there are mamas on here who've had positive hospital births. You just HAVE to be in the right place in your heart and mind before doing a homebirth, and if you aren't then it's not for you. Absolutely no shame in that!

My first - well, I was active-duty military back in the day when you didn't have a choice. You get pregnant, you go to the hospital to birth. End of story. It was a terrible experience.

Second - I took a Lamaze class with a midwife at a birth center, and honestly if she'd clicked with me on a personal level, I'd have probably gone with the birth center that time. After all my very first experience with birth as a 7-year old was watching my SIL birth my oldest nephew in her home, on her couch, with her MW. Homebirths were not a foreign concept for me, but I didn't have the level of self-confidence needed to attempt it just then.

Third - I did the same hospital with the same doc (even the same room) as I did with #2, because it never occurred to me to do something else. DS was only 15 months old, DD#1 was 3-1/2, and I was too tired to care about how it happened. I know that sounds bad, but I was also quite young. The epidurals, by the way, never worked for me. My transition goes so fast, and I have a slight curvature to my spine, that it just never took, in any of the attempts.

Fourth - different state, different DH, different frame of mind - and no insurance. Birth center was cheaper and I loved the MW. So I ditched the hospital mindset and went with the birth center.

Fifth - I took the plunge entirely and went with the homebirth. I loved it so much it actually hurt me to think I would not be able to do it with #6... but after I left the H, my options were much more open and now I WILL be able to HB with my best friend and a different, but much-loved MW.

Like PPs have said, it's what's best for you. Your birth can be beautiful no matter where it happens... it's all in how you view it. Besides, the birth is not the most important thing - the BABY is.


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## mntnmom (Sep 21, 2006)

First time, i didn't know there was an option. Second time, I was terrified that my horrible first birth was an indication my body couldn't do it. 3rd time, I felt guilty spending the money out of pocket.
Finally did a homebirth for number 4. I try not to regret the other births, but I won't ever go back to a hosp. if I can avoid it. Though 2and3 weren't bad experiences at all.


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## leerypolyp (Feb 22, 2005)

Because we had an emergency transfer from our planned homebirth.

The birth part was sort of stereotypical hospital, with a bunch of random strangers crowding around and yelling, "Push! Push!" and the immediate postpartum was more of the same, with somebody trying to take my baby away every twenty minutes for some stupid reason. At least the birth itself, I had my regular midwife, who made a safe little space around me, and I had the kind of birth I wanted (vaginal, no pain meds).

I'm not sure how I'll do it this time.


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## elanorh (Feb 1, 2006)

I've had two hospital births. I'd love to have a homebirth but I don't think it's in the cards for us, unless we UC and I don't know if dh/I can get over that hump.

#1 - While the women in my family all do NCB, only one was an out-of-hospital birth (surprise UC). So I went with the OB she'd used (we live in the same community) -- home birth didn't occur to me as an option (I suppose that I figured that, other than 'accidents,' it was illegal - and that's pretty much the way the law reads in my state. No assisted homebirths here).

#2 - Our OB is from the midwife model; we went ahead with our second at the hospital. Go when it's time, give birth about an hour later, no interventions at all (other than a hospital gown and IV for my heart condition - abx).

For me the real problem with my hospital births has been the afterwards stuff - the nurses checking me every other hour, and checking the baby every between hour; so there's no rest at all. I was able to cosleep with SJ in my room, but it certainly was NOT restful to have the nurses popping in all the time!!!

Honestly I'd love an assisted homebirth. And I think I could get dh on board with that (will be watching _The Business of Being Born_ with him soon, he's already leaning more towards homebirth). We pay out-of-pocket for our births, so a $10,000+ hospital birth just is craaazy.

We've talked about me and the girls relocating to my aunt's in the next state and birthing with a lay midwife at her home, or else at the birth center there (much cheaper than our hospital here). I labor too quickly to try to drive that far --- and again, not so certain that a UC is something we'd want to transition to (yet?). But then, I hear the horror stories about medically-minded midwives, and nurses, etc. and --- hard as it may be to believe, my OB really is awesome. NCB, pro-extended bf, no episiotomies, will delay cord clamping.... If we could get him to do a home delivery, I'd be really happy!

I do think that even if we do have a hospital birth next time, we may discuss with Ped and OB and check out immediately after delivery rather than put up with all the interruptions etc. from staff. I'd be far more relaxed just at home in my own bed with my baby!There is a part of me which hopes that by the time we're ready to have another baby, dh is ready for us to 'accidentally' have a baby at home. Just go to the hospital to be checked out, and come home.


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## desertpenguin (Apr 15, 2005)

i had a hospital birth with my ds because i was young (18), kinda scared and not very informed of all my birth choices. i thought a homebirth would be lovely, but couldn't get past the 'what-ifs'. i was naive enough to think that my OB and the nurses would listen to all of my requests. i am having a homebirth this time. my dh was not very comfortable with the idea at first but i've spent a lot of time educating him about it. i don't think that homebirth is right for every woman. what's more important is that the woman be happy and comfortable with where she is giving birth and having attendants (if she chooses to have any) that respect her wishes. if i were to have another hospital birth for whatever reason, i would definitely be a lot more picky about which hospital based on how mother and baby friendly they are. granted, where we live now we actually have a choice of hospitals, which wasn't really the case where we lived when ds was born.


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## rmzbm (Jul 8, 2005)

Because I didn't realize homebirth was an option. And because of that I set in motion the events that lead to 5 c-sections. If I could do it all again I'd never so much as see an MD. I caution anyone thinking of having a hospital birth for their first to make sure they take future births into consideration as well. Don't limit your future options, learn more about homebirth.

Just my 2 cents.


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## WC_hapamama (Sep 19, 2005)

I've had 4 hospital births.

I delivered at the hospital with my first because I didn't really consider another option. I had an okay birth experience. Not
a horror story, but not great either. I was unprepared and the
very small community hospital I delivered at had 10 deliveries in 24 hours, so things were busy. I had a pph, so I guess it was a good thing I delivered at the hospital.

I delivered my second at a different, larger hospital, partially because I had some complications early in the pregnancy, and partially because the previous pph scared me. I was induced because I was showing signs of pih. The other factor that played into my decision is that I had a toddler at home, and I wanted the time to recover before I got thrown back into the housekeeping and childcare thing, since DH didn't get any time off after the baby was born. I had a good experience there.

The births of my 3rd and 4th were at the same hospital, only with epidurals because I knew DH was going to be in and out of the room. Again, good experiences, other than vitals checks and daily checkups, they pretty much let me be.


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## kalirush (Jun 14, 2005)

Because the birth option I had planned on (freestanding birthing center with a midwife) wasn't available. Hospital with an OB was all that my insurance covered, and I didn't know enough about homebirth to be cool with it. A mistake, in retrospect.

If a birthing center was available now, I'd definitely go for it (I don't think my tiny cluttered apartment is a terribly nice place to birth and would *much* rather go somewhere else). Since it isn't, I'm doing a homebirth this time.


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## _betsy_ (Jun 29, 2004)

I had an OB attended hospital birth, because, well, that's just what you *do,* right? I read, I researched, but I liked my OB, had heard good things about the hospital, and overall had a good birth experience.

We're in a small, 2-bedroom condo with neighbors upstairs, downstairs and on both sides. I don't want to deal with a homebirth here.

I'm planning a midwife-attended hospital birth with this little one. So far, I really like the MW. Have heard excellent things from like-minded mamas about this hospital.

There's only one birth center around here, and while DH and I would be willing to look into it, our insurance won't cover it.


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## honeybee (Mar 12, 2004)

I had a hospital birth with my first because I was brainwashed by our culture into believing it was the only safe route to go. I thought homebirth was only something freaky celebrities and hippies did.







I didn't know anyone IRL who had had a homebirth, or even heard of someone who knew someone who'd had one.

Towards the end of my pregnancy I started reading some of the actual statistics on homebirth and also about interventions in hospitals. I got really paranoid about not being able to get a NCB in a hospital or ending up with a c-section. I realized, intellectually, that hb was safe. I have a stats background, and the MANA study is pretty darn convincing. But, I still wasn't in a mental space where I could see a homebirth for myself. It was just such a FOREIGN concept. And I also wouldn't have known where to begin looking for a mw (I'd never even heard of Mothering at that point!). Although, it turns out I could've just looked in the phone book.

I had a good hospital birth with ds1. I hired a doula and had confidence in my doc (a family practitioner, so more like a mw than an OB philosophically). But afterwards, I realized I really didn't need to be there. Birthing at the hospital gave me confidence to trust that my body really knew what it was doing, and all the hospital stuff just got in the way. Plus, I later joined LLL and actually met several mothers who had homebirths, and I was just awed by their stories.

It's funny how life changes. I'm now part of a natural parenting group, with about 5 of us all due around the same time, and we're ALL having homebirths, lol! So, now hb has become normalized for me and I wonder why anyone would choose a hospital!


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## ~Katie~ (Mar 18, 2007)

I had a hospital birth because there weren't any homebirth midwives in my area when we lived in NY. Instead I got a great midwife and had an awesome hospital birth the way I wanted it. No IV, no drugs being offered, no pushy nurses. I got to eat and drink, I labored and birthed exactly how I wanted to. Everyone present wanted to see me succeed in getting my waterbirth, and I did. I'm sure it was much like a free standing birth center rather than a hospital birth. That being said, I know my experience is rare, and it has cemented the idea that normal birth should stay at home. Most hospitals will not be supportive of the birth I had. Plus is sucked having to get dressed to drive to the hospital when I could have just stayed at home naked


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## Caterfran (May 29, 2008)

i was dead set on home birth after being enlightened by a friend's experience. her story was amazing and that was what i wanted... just do what all my grandparents and aunts did and just have 'em at home.

so when i finally DID get pg, dh was adamantly against it and there was not alot that would convince him. i tried to just wait it out and do it anyway (haha...like he wouldn't notice or something).

anyway i ended up having some complications that put baby in distress (very odd position, heart rate dangeroulsy low) and almost had to have c.s. but had a very good dr. who did everything he could to keep that from happening and did, indeed. his father was a babycatcher in the caribbean and he knows his stuff and was never invasive.my mom thought he was "negligent" because he thought certain tests/procedures were unnecesary. lol.

i was disappointed with certain nurses though... they treated me like i was stupid because i refused medication and wanted to walk around... the dr. let me do whatever i wanted, though.

by the time it was over, i didn't care where or how he got out... i was just glad he was alive and there was no damage done to either of us.

btw: pitocin, i am convinced, is a distillation of pure evil. that's really the only other bad thing... that and the nurses trying to give the baby formula even though his isolette had a sheet of paper with BREAST plastered on the side... geeze. that was a fight... had a little jaundice so they said i couldn't bf. i showed them, though. that's one thing i got my way with


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## SublimeBirthGirl (Sep 9, 2005)

I just didn't realize how much better homebirth was. I had never attended one. I didn't attend my first homebirth til after my hospital birth, which was pretty good but could have been much better had I stayed home. Once I saw the deep respect for birth that is present in that environment, I knew I could never go back to the hospital. I regret having had a hospital birth, especially since my husband would have supported whatever I wanted.


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## momileigh (Oct 29, 2002)

I had my first at the hospital because I believed there was no way I was going to be able to deal with the pain and I would have to have an epidural.

I had two inexperienced but loving doulas and a very cooperative body and baby. That's why I ended up with an intervention-free, unmedicated, exhilarating birth in the hospital. (Did I ask for the epidural? Yes I did! Did I get it? No I did not! (I went too fast.) Am I happy about this? YES!!!)

Now I know how extremely lucky I was. I had my second in a birth center (not at home b/c we were in a small apt. w/ no tub and the bc was 10 minutes away) and would have any future babies at home without question.


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## laneysprout (Aug 5, 2006)

CPMs are not legally recognized in RI where we live. The ones who do attend births here come over from neighboring states. Given that it was my first birth and I didn't know what to expect, I had concerns that someone coming form another state might not get here in time.

I interviewed every CNM I could find and found one who attended births at a small, inner-city community hospital (rather than our big "Baby Factory" hospital that has birth center it is easy to risk out of). She had home births when her children were born and was very respectful of our decisions. We came home four hours after DDs birth to our family bed.

Would I have preferred a home birth? Yes, definitely. Will I have my next babe at home? Yes, definitely. But in hindsight, I was so scared during transition that I wonder if I would have freaked out and demanded someone take me to the hospital if I had been home. As it was, I felt like everyone was conspiring against me when it hit







.


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## mamatowill (Aug 23, 2004)

I was debating with my first but DH was set against it and I was worried about complications since it was my first. I ended with a c-section but that was due to the size of the baby- he was huge and would have had shoulder dystocia. I will be having a hospital birth for this one also because of what happened last time. My OB is willing to try a VBAC so that is good. I would be worried that there would be problems again with bleeding.


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## tjjazzy (Jan 18, 2007)

i've never really taken it into consideration. i'm too much of a chicken! i admire women with the bravery to do it but it's not for me. however, my yoga teacher/friend did and midwifes wouldn't deliver her where we live. too far from the hospital. i'm glad i didn't. i was in the hospital b/c i bled too much, was low on iron, and then my son was there under the lights with jaundice. we were there for 6 days. i tore and was very uncomfortable and glad for the help from the nurses. one of them took my son for me (we room-in exclusively here) so i could get some sleep. i was very grateful for their help. i'm returning to that hospital with this baby b/c the maternity ward was so great there. wonderful nurses and hubby stayed almost every night in the fold-out chair (they were out of cots) with me.


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## laneysprout (Aug 5, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *tjjazzy* 
i admire women with the bravery to do it but it's not for me.

I'm the opposite...I think women who birth in hospitals are the brave ones!


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## ChristyM26 (Feb 26, 2006)

I had a hospital birth because I lost my first babies, twin boys, at 20 weeks. I knew that I wouldn't be able to live with myself if anything happened to this baby so I had a good bit of monitoring done throughout the pregnancy. I also have a great OB/gyn who listens to me and talks with me about the decisions that need to be made. My only testing was u/s and the GD test. I skipped everything else - although skipping GBS meant automatic antibiotics. I also spent time learning about the hospital I used, which was incredible. When I went into labor at 36+3, they were all incredible. I had a partial placental abruption (nobody knew that!) and the whole time my OB was discussing options with me and explaining why she felt certain ways even as things were getting dire. She never paniced or pulled the dead baby card (although she legitimately could have). End result was no c-section, although I gave birth in the OR, and they did have to use forceps to get him out but I tore (only 2nd degree) instead of an episiotomy and the care I got afterwards was amazing.

IMO, it's all about research. What I did isn't for everybody - although it turned out to definitely be the right decision. I would have ended up in the hospital if I had homebirthed and who knows what the outcome would have been then. But you really have to reseach what you're doing and make sure you have the best care providers possible.


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## tjjazzy (Jan 18, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *laneysprout* 
I'm the opposite...I think women who birth in hospitals are the brave ones!

after reading around, i've come to realize that my hospital is a little different than the hospitals we're discussing here. it has a birthing center within.







i'm thinking that's what made the big difference with how i perceive hospital birthds and how others are here.


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## momileigh (Oct 29, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *tjjazzy* 
after reading around, i've come to realize that my hospital is a little different than the hospitals we're discussing here. it has a birthing center within.







i'm thinking that's what made the big difference with how i perceive hospital birthds and how others are here.

Hospitals with a "birthing center within" and hospitals that have a "maternity ward" usually have few (if any) differences in how patients are treated. It is all marketing. White out "maternity ward" and splash the word "birth center" on there, and suddenly women imagine they're going to get better care. I know I made that assumption. I had read books that said a birth center was a great way to go, then I went to my hospital and saw the words "birth center," and I thought, "Oh! Good! This must be a really progressive, great hospital." (Now I know their c/s rate is 37% etc.)

I gave birth in a "birth center" inside a hospital, and then in a birth center out of and unaffiliated with a hospital. I assure you, they were entirely different environments. If the "birthing center" within your hospital really is any different than any other hospital, I'd be curious to hear about what the differences are.


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## felix23 (Nov 7, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *tjjazzy* 
after reading around, i've come to realize that my hospital is a little different than the hospitals we're discussing here. it has a birthing center within.







i'm thinking that's what made the big difference with how i perceive hospital birthds and how others are here.

Yeah, I think that my hospital is way different then some of the ones mentioned on MDC. It is basically a birth center right next to the hospital.


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## intorainbowz (Aug 16, 2006)

I birthed in the hospital because I had a high risk pregnancy. I had a scheduled CS and we knew DD was going to the NICU after birth.


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## birthangeldoula (Feb 1, 2008)

I also birthed in the hospital because I found out at 20 weeks that my son was going to be born with a heart defect and need immediate care after birth. My water also broke at 34 weeks 5 days so he had prematurity on top of that. I ended up with a c/s after 28 hours of labor. After all of that, I'd continue to birth in a hospital since my chances of having a second child with a heart defect increases and ultrasound doesn't always catch everything. I'd also feel more comfortable at a hospital for a vbac than at home.


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## spu (Dec 6, 2002)

I had hospital births for all 4 of my kids.

My first pregnancy was twins, so I went to a perinatologist - and thank god I did - I almost lost them at 18w due to my cervix wide open, and water bags descending... when the time came to deliver, I agreed to a scheduled induction (mistake #1...) and after a grueling unproductive unhappy labor, I ended up with a c.

My second pregnancy was with a mw at a different (smaller) hospital - I wanted a change of care to a mw practice who would support my decision to vbac, and a natural birth (bradley, etc...), and also a level 2 or better nicu just in case. Despite everything and being super-informed, and having a great natural labor, I ended up with another c as DS was starting to show signs of fetal distress not tolerating such a long labor and his heart tones were going flat despite moving around, hydration, naps, etc. Not an emergency yet, but on its way. I'm glad I was in a hospital because it gave me peace of mind. I know that sounds contradictory, but I know we all tried everything possible to labor wonderfully, with full support, and the big guy was actually stuck (posterior, asynclytic, 10lbs 3 oz...) Before doing the c, I asked them to try and go up manually and see if they could pull him out. Sounds crazy, but they tried - even with a vaccuum. DS has a huge noggin, and he was really wedged in there. Maybe it was the castor oil induction I did at home, and my water breaking, sending him down the runway before he was aligned?!?

My third pregnancy was also at the same mw practice at the hospital. I labored at home as I did with my second pregnancy, and arrived at 10cm +3, and delivered vba2c 35 minutes later. My prenatal care was amazing. I tell you though, having this be my first experience pushing, I'm glad I was in such a supportive environment. If I was at home, I never would have pushed the way I did, even with a doula. I had complete faith in the mw who delivered my baby - and it was the first time I had met her! Plus, knowing if I ended up with distress, as in the last time, I would be aware, and they could save me and my baby within minutes. So that gave me lots of confidence to turn inward, and let my animal instinct go wild.

If I were to have another (eek!!!!) I'd love to have a home birth as I now know what it's like to successfully push a baby out. Though, if I did, I would make sure to have the best darn team with me for support. the only drawback is we're a good 40 minutes from the hospital if anything should arise, and that's with middle-of-the-night speeding through red lights and no traffic or construction (does that even happen in boston???)

It's such a personal decision. I'm glad I was in a hospital for all 3 times. Each time had a different story to tell, and I learned a lot while there. The last time, it was as close to a home birth as one could get - I didn't even have an IV or any meds. Just me, DH, mw, and her nurse. It was calm, quiet, beautiful, warm, dimly lit... bliss!

I know that at this particular hospital, if you're a mw patient, you have one team of nurses, even postpartum, and if you're an ob patient, you have another team of nurses, and they can make or break your comfort level. If you are in a hospital, and you don't like your nurse - or anyone else for that matter, get rid of them and ask for someone else. It's very important to have a good connection with anyone in the room with you!


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## littlecityfarmer (Apr 27, 2004)

I have had 3 hospital-births because I have a prosthetic heart valve that gives medical care providers fits. So, even though I'm a healthy multip, I'm risked out of all but the Perinatology practice (where I did mostly see midwives, but not the same as my friends who have homebirthed). DH is not on-board with UC, and given the increased risk of hemorrhage and cardiac issues I face when birthing, I'm not really on board with it, either.

My hospital births have been ok, and I've not experienced the cascade of interventions that so many others do. I speak up, make sure my wishes are known and honored, and they pretty much let me do my thing!


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## Funny Face (Dec 7, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Crystal_R* 
For those of you that had a hospital birth for at least one of your kids why did you choose that instead of a homebirth? I'm having a hospital birth for my first and it's for a number of reasons. My husband is not comfortable with home birth and while I'm the one going through labor I refuse to just push his feelings and concerns aside. To me, his fears aren't really justified, but I understand them. Also I know logically my body is built to have babies, but emotionally I'm not at the point where I can shove all the what ifs away and say and feel mostly certain that my body really can do this.

These are the same reasons I decided to go with a hospital. I did resent my husband for not giving me the chance to interview a homebirth midwife but ultimately I was a little scared too.

I now regret not doing everything I could to work through my doubt in myself, my ability to birth and mostly my ability to handle the pain of labor. I didn't have a bad birth at the hospital but that is one less homebirth I get to have!


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## Romana (Mar 3, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *momileigh* 
I gave birth in a "birth center" inside a hospital, and then in a birth center out of and unaffiliated with a hospital. I assure you, they were entirely different environments. If the "birthing center" within your hospital really is any different than any other hospital, I'd be curious to hear about what the differences are.

I have an OB resident friend and when she was in med school, the hospital she was at had a birth center as well as a maternity ward. In the birth center (still part of the hospital), they did waterbirths with midwives and there was a ton of NCB support. In the maternity ward, it was more like what you'd expect in a hospital.

Sure, there are plenty of hospitals who do nothing but rename the maternity ward the X Hospital Family Birth Center and upgrade the post-baby birth celebration menu (now with wild-caught Atlantic salmon or filet mignon!), but then there really are hospitals with true birth centers. It just depends. It all comes down to really doing the research.


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## momileigh (Oct 29, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Romana9+2* 
I have an OB resident friend and when she was in med school, the hospital she was at had a birth center as well as a maternity ward. In the birth center (still part of the hospital), they did waterbirths with midwives and there was a ton of NCB support. In the maternity ward, it was more like what you'd expect in a hospital.

I know you might not know the answer to this, but I'm wondering: if you wanted an epidural or needed pitocin augmentation or an induction, would you have to transfer to the maternity ward, or was all that available at the in-hospital birth center? Do you know what kind of fetal monitoring was done in the birth center? I'd be very interested; if you don't know but you can ask your friend, that'd be awesome.


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## Rivka5 (Jul 13, 2005)

You know how "women's bodies are made for birthing?" Mine wasn't. My body was made to be crippled, and the only reason I can walk at all is that I've had eight pelvic surgeries. Some of the surgeries I had when I was a kid partially obstructed the birth canal. So I knew I was at high risk of C-section - my very experienced, very patient midwife estimated greater than 50% chance.

I chose CNMs who were genuinely independent practitioners - there wasn't a doctor in the back room making the real decisions, and I knew I wasn't going to be held to stupid stuff like a labor clock. My birth was wonderful. I managed a vaginal delivery after pushing on my hands and knees for two hours, and my daughter was never out of my sight.

Also, I _so_ agree with this:

Quote:


Originally Posted by *~sweet pea~* 
truthfully, the idea of giving birth _at my house_ just isn't appealing to me. I'd prefer the hospital shower to my own shower (where the hot water runs out after fifteen minutes), and the hospital jacuzzi to my 1960s tiny tub or a kiddie pool. Yes, call me a prima donna, but if I'm going to drip, poop, bleed, or gush in any significant quantities, I'd rather it be on hospital linens and linoleum, not my own sheets (and mattress pad cover, and mattress pad) and hardwood floors. For me, babymoon begins with _someone else_ handling this aspect of clean-up because I don't find it romantic at all.

When I envision a homebirth, I imagine bloody handprints on the wallpaper and stepping on a lego in the middle of a contraction. One of my favorite things about my hospital birth was the constant stream of clean gowns, towels, and pads. My water broke early on, and I was _goopy._


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## carriebft (Mar 10, 2007)

I had a homebirth with white carpets and white sheets (and light blue walls!)....no spots at all and no hand prints







My midwives were great...just got clean towels and chux pads when I needed them, and it didn't even interrupt my laboring at all which was really nice (since i had a huge bed to move around in plus the floor)

That said, my first two were in the hospital because I was uneducated and didn't look into my birth options.


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## Thalia the Muse (Jun 22, 2006)

I chose a hospital birth because:

We lived on a stair-access-only street -- it was five flights up to the top of the hill, or seven flights down. In an emergency, transporting would have been difficult at best.

All hospital expenses were paid by my insurance, so we literally paid nothing. And the hospital had great rooming-in policies and on-staff lactation consultants.

I wanted the option of pain relief.

My fertility guy was also my OB, so by that point (after a year and a half of testing and poking and prodding) I knew him really well and trusted him. He gave me the answers I was looking for on the issues I cared about -- allowed to move in labor, no episiotomy, no induction, etc. And a very low c-section rate. Basically, I knew the guy and knew he would listen to me.


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## AlexisT (May 6, 2007)

#1 was a planned hospital birth turned emergency C-section.

Future births will all be hospital. DD had ABO incompatibility jaundice, and while I haven't been able to find good stats on recurrence, I'm not comfortable being without blood testing and phototherapy facilities.


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## glendora (Jan 24, 2005)

Money. It would have been way more expensive to have an attended homebirth, and I am not comfortable with UC.


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## Girlprof (Jun 11, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *momileigh* 
I know you might not know the answer to this, but I'm wondering: if you wanted an epidural or needed pitocin augmentation or an induction, would you have to transfer to the maternity ward, or was all that available at the in-hospital birth center? Do you know what kind of fetal monitoring was done in the birth center? I'd be very interested; if you don't know but you can ask your friend, that'd be awesome.









I'm not the original person, but I can answer for the birth center where I planned to give birth: no. No epidural, no pitocin. Intermittent fetal monitoring. I ended up having to be induced (high blood pressure) and that sent me right to the hospital. I kept my MWs though and my son was still able to be present.


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## applejuice (Oct 8, 2002)

Quote:

All hospital expenses were paid by my insurance, so we literally paid nothing.
This statement always amazes me.

Of course you paid something. What do you think your insurance premiums are for? Even if you or your DP are covered by a group insurance plan at work, the money that the company pays for you and your family is part of your compensation which is not taxed.

So, you did not have your baby for free at the hospital. You may not have written a big check, but you paid for it, and so did everyone who pays into your private or group insurance plan.

Nothing is free. Get over that idea now.


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## Thalia the Muse (Jun 22, 2006)

Excuse me, but why are you being so condescending? I and my company pay the premiums for the health insurance every month whether I use the services or not. Therefore, I paid nothing for the birth. I paid insurance premiums, just as I do every month when NOT giving birth. I didn't say that the birth was unpaid for -- it was paid for by the insurance policy. There was no co-pay on my end (as there is for almost every other medical service -- I was shocked!).

If I had had a homebirth or birth center birth, I would have paid my usual insurance premiums plus the out-of-pocket fees for the midwife.

I paid nothing for the birth. I paid for insurance coverage. Given that I was paying for that anyway, and would have regardless of my reproductive status, the expense to me of the birth = zero.

I do understand how insurance works, and I also know that the cost of my particular birth was not sufficient to raise the premiums for other plan participants, and that the premiums were not going down if I chose not to use the coverage ... we're all paying plenty whether we use the coverage or not.


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## momileigh (Oct 29, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Girlprof* 
I'm not the original person, but I can answer for the birth center where I planned to give birth: no. No epidural, no pitocin. Intermittent fetal monitoring. I ended up having to be induced (high blood pressure) and that sent me right to the hospital. I kept my MWs though and my son was still able to be present.

So you're speaking of an in-hospital birth center, and you were transferred to a different area for intervention? Was it a different floor, different wing?

Thanks for the reply.


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## cranberriesfor5 (Nov 28, 2007)

I had all mine in the hospital. For the 1st two I did not really know any different. I never even heard of HB or UC. For my 3rd we wanted a HB, but by the time we decided to it was so stressful to find a MW b/c I was 37 weeks and we did not have the money to pay out of pocket for a MW, so then I toyed with the idea of a UC but my dd was seizing in utero and I wanted to be at the hossy incase she needed immediate attention. Turns out I should have done the UC b/c she was healthy as can be and her seizures did not start out of womb until she was about a week old.


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

:


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## tjjazzy (Jan 18, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *momileigh* 
Hospitals with a "birthing center within" and hospitals that have a "maternity ward" usually have few (if any) differences in how patients are treated. It is all marketing. White out "maternity ward" and splash the word "birth center" on there, and suddenly women imagine they're going to get better care. I know I made that assumption. I had read books that said a birth center was a great way to go, then I went to my hospital and saw the words "birth center," and I thought, "Oh! Good! This must be a really progressive, great hospital." (Now I know their c/s rate is 37% etc.)

I gave birth in a "birth center" inside a hospital, and then in a birth center out of and unaffiliated with a hospital. I assure you, they were entirely different environments. If the "birthing center" within your hospital really is any different than any other hospital, I'd be curious to hear about what the differences are.

a couple of things that i know of with my experience at the hospital i go to (i've never had any other experiences):

the birthing center and the maternity ward are two different things in the hospital i attend. you have your baby in the birthing center (it is a seperate part of the hospital, where you register and are admitted to give birth with labour and birthing rooms and its own waiting rooms and triage) and you stay in the maternity ward after (we were there for 6 days--i for losing a lot of blood and my son for jaundice.) the nurses caring for mamas and babies in the maternity ward were wonderful--they're the reason i'm going back there.

my OB never once did an internal exam. i didn't have one until i was in labour. she was too relaxed, if you ask me. i just stayed with my family doctor until 27 weeks this time, b/c his nurse could listen to the baby's heartbeat and check my fundal height just as well as my OB could but was closer to my house.

i'm in ontario, canada, so it might be different than what you're perceiving. i think that's what was confusing me with all the different stories.

they asked me before they did anything at all. i made the choices.

there was no episiotomy. i tore. they were using forceps (they _asked_ if i wanted to try them or keep pushing some more) so it's not like they didn't have the chance to cut.

everyone cleared out of the room after the birth. just me, the baby, my husband, and the nurse. they turned down the lights and helped me with BFing before we left the room (which had tub, CD player, etc. in it)

during labour and pushing, i was with the nurse and my husband only for a very long while.

they didn't jump in with all kinds of procedures even though i lost blood. they kept an eye on me first and then put me on iron pills instead of a blood transfusion.

rooming in is the only option. there are no baby nurseries where all the babies go to stay.

i didn't get the birth i wanted but that was no one's fault. i couldn't handle the back labour, throwing up, and the bladder infection i had so i asked for an epidural. no one offered.

not all experiences have to be bad ones. none of my friends (all with children) have complained about their births being negative. out of all of them (about 12, i think it is now), only 2 had c-sections (one b/c of placenta previa) and most of the rest didn't get epidurals (they chose the hospital near here that does not offer them.) one watched her birth in the mirror in the hospital. among the women i know, it is difficult to admit not being able to BF. it's just what everyone does. FF feels like the shameful option.

(edit) did i mention we're 45 minutes from the hospital? (we have small hospitals about 20 minutes away but i don't go there for anything serious.)


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## CTH3989 (Sep 28, 2006)

With my DS, I just never thought of homebirth. As my pregnancy progressed I became more natural. I decided on a natural birth using the Bradley Method and I switched from an OB to a MW. With this baby, I decided to do UP (have seen a MW a few times) and decided that a UC would be best for me. DH finally agreed and we are happy. I just feel that this is right. I couldn't even bring myself to fill out the hospital pre-registration forms. Which I want to do just in case I need to be transfered.


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## spu (Dec 6, 2002)

good points about birthing centers / maternity wards... in fact, I didn't think they even called it a maternity ward these days LOL!

I have 4 kids, birthed at two different hospitals. Like the PP, both had separate labor and delivery areas (birth center - style...) - private rooms to stay while you labor and deliver, and then a separate wing that is postpartum. Make sure to check out both areas. I loved my labor / delivery room at the smaller hospital - it had windows with a view of Boston, tungsten lights (same as at home), a sound system if I chose to use music (brought my ipod, never used it until postpartum where I hooked it up to a portable speaker). Very non-hospital-like. Didn't feel or smell sterile at all.


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## wombatclay (Sep 4, 2005)

OP- I had a hospital birth with dd1 and with dd2. At the time our local (small, rural) hospital was very mama and baby friendly. Many of the nurses had had their own natural births there, they supported hypnobirthing & waterbirthing. Births were attended by midwives and family practice drs as well as OBs, doulas were encouraged, parents were left alone to birth however they wanted. Other than the 20 minute strip on arrival there was no automatic monitoring. VBAC mamas can use the tub or shower (vbacs are asked to have a heplock, to tell a nurse 1st if they are going for a walk, and to have doppler monitoring of the babe every 15 minutes while pushin) , all mamas can wander the halls or garden, eat and drink whatever they want, wear as little or as much as they like, sit on the birth balls or rock in the chairs or deliver in a squat or really anything they would like to do. No one offers meds (though they are available and the anesthesia dudes are extremely good) and there is a real "of course you can do it" vibe.

After birth rooming in is automatic (at the time there was only the small NICU nursery, no well baby nursery), breastfeeding is strongly encouraged (you can bring your own formula and paci but they don't provide for well infants), you can bring cloth dipes. State law requires a few interventions in newborns but they will work with you in terms of minimizing these (for example, the required eye goop was applied while dd1 slept). And the food was yummy.
 








However, they have changed insurance providers... the natural birth care providers lost their hospital access (too risky apparently for the hospital to encourage natural birth and vbacs) and although nothing has "officially" changed there is almost no chance of a mama getting a supported birth there now. So future children will have to be hbacs... I don't have any other choice (which stinks, since I really enjoyed my hospital births at that hospital).


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## fresh_water (Feb 29, 2008)

I live too far from a decent hospital for my own comfort if something went wrong. Also, I don't think I'd be able to relax in my own home, knowing I had all sorts of bodily fluids coming out of me onto my bed/couch/bath tub/etc. I liked that the nurses all cleaned it up and I didn't have to see it lol.


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## Elijahs Momma (Dec 12, 2007)

Well, I wanted to homebirth with ds but we didn't know there were any homebirthing midwives around here, plus we couldn't afford it. But we birthed at the hospital birthing center. I am kinda glad we did have a hospital birth as it turned out I ended up with pre-eclampsia and there were some other complications so I think that what we did was the best thing for us.


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## mom2annika (Mar 30, 2006)

I had my first at the hospital after months of negotiating with DH and interviewing all sorts of health care providers, including 4 midwives. I had a doula, and that was our compromise. DH was just not ready to sign on for HB. I had no drugs. I was very lucky to have gone into labor at night, so we arrived at the hospital at midnight and the night nurse mostly left us alone. I wasn't so lucky with the day shift---they didn't like me (cause I was making their job more complicated) and I didn't like them either.

Given a choice I wouldn't go back to the hospital with a normal pg. We might have used a birth center or hospital midwives with our first, but we felt like we lived too far away from either of those options. I'm really excited to be moving now, since there are two freestanding birth centers very close to our new city. I'm touring them Monday!


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## Sonnenwende (Sep 9, 2006)

I had no interest in doing anything else than giving birth in the hospital.


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## AGierald (Sep 5, 2007)

i had one because i really just wasnt comfortable with having a homebirth. Im ALL for them, i think its AWESOME when someone has one, they're just not for me. However, i had my baby in a hospital birthing center, and will the next children. If theres ever birthing centers in IL, i'll go there.

Again though, i think homebirths are awesome, i just want the option of drugs, even if i dont get them







: lol


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## clover (Nov 20, 2001)

We live about an hour away from any type of medical facility in the mountains. When my son was born there were no midwives willing to deliver this far out. So I had my son in the hospital with a midwife. I had a wonderful experience, no pushy nurses. They had a birth tub, ball, stool, all the goods. All of my choices were respected, the baby never left my side. I have chosen to have this baby with the same midwives at the same hospital. I do know of one lay midwife now who will deliver in our town, she delivered my friends baby and I was there for the birth which was lovely, but I am still opting for the hospital as we are so so far away if.... and my first birth was awesome. That said I am a big supporter of homebirth and if I lived closer to town I would definately be doing it!!!!!


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## dachshundqueen (Dec 17, 2004)

Even had I wanted to, my first birth I would've risked out.

I was in the ER every two weeks or so for either bleeding or excrutiating pain (worse than the contrax with second kid) that would go on for 6-8 hours.

Oh it sucked. Otherwise, I also had a grapefruit sized fibroid that pregnancy that was larger than babe for most of pg. Then I had PROM at just barely 36 weeks. Resuscitation team was called in to check baby's breathing and all, but baby was fine.

Baby 2 was on ins plan that required baby to be born at local hospy with MAJOR anti-baby/mama practices and I was hopeful for a normal pg (didn't have to do fertility second time around). So I opted to attempt HB.

Liz


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## granola_mom (Jun 11, 2007)

Because I was living with my dad at the time, and he wasn't for it... waaaay too uptight and paranoid and didn't want to give birth in a house full of that energy. I could have done it if I had stayed with my mum, but the energy there was worse... she's abusive, and I didn't want her anywhere near me for the birth.

I compromised with my dad and agreed on staying until I hit transition... when I got to that point, I could definitely feel the tension in the air







so I high tailed it out of there.


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## alison_in_oh (Nov 23, 2005)

I needed my husband's support, and he was most comfortable going to the hospital. I wasn't attached to the idea of homebirth -- I was new to my rental, it didn't feel like a welcoming place to birth my baby, and anyway I had my own doubts and misgivings. I should have pushed for the birth center but didn't. My pain-med-free hospital birth was perfectly adequate, and I'll probably be going that route again with this one.


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## tireesix (Apr 27, 2006)

I was bullied into birthing my first in hospital.


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## YesandNo (Mar 16, 2008)

I had no interest in a homebirth for myself, and I don't think a homebirth in inherently better (which seems to be the assumption of this thread). They're fine of course, just not for me.

I consider hospital births to be an important health insurance benefit. I know the birth experience varies for each woman, and I did not know how I would react to it, so I wanted to keep my options open. My hospital was great, I had a midwife birth and my room was equipped with a private tub to help with labor pains.

Quote:

truthfully, the idea of giving birth at my house just isn't appealing to me. I'd prefer the hospital shower to my own shower (where the hot water runs out after fifteen minutes), and the hospital jacuzzi to my 1960s tiny tub or a kiddie pool. Yes, call me a prima donna, but if I'm going to drip, poop, bleed, or gush in any significant quantities, I'd rather it be on hospital linens and linoleum, not my own sheets (and mattress pad cover, and mattress pad) and hardwood floors. For me, babymoon begins with someone else handling this aspect of clean-up because I don't find it romantic at all.










And my labor nurses and maternity ward nurses were so awesome, their wisdom and kindness and humor were a blessing to me. I will never forget the nurse who, right after the birth and BFing DD for the first time, made me a PB&J sandwich when she saw that the cafeteria screwed up and sent a non-vegetarian dinner. Yeah, my husband or mom could have done that, but they were enraptured by the baby (fair enough!) and to be honest I wanted a moment to be "off" emotionally anyway.


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## MommytoHHH (Sep 12, 2006)

There are no midwives where I live. There are no birthing centers where I live. Even if there were, my insurance doesn't cover that. We can't afford to shell out 2-3,000$ for a birth that our insurance doesn't cover. It costs me nothing but my $500 deductible to have all my prenatal care and birth at the hospital. My first DD was born in a hospital and my second will be too. I had a detailed birth plan and felt that overall they were very respectful of my choices. I do wish I could birth in water, but my hospital does not have that option.


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## knowerofnada (Dec 4, 2006)

I had a hospital birth with both girls because DH wouldn't allow a homebirth. He supported me on the no-vax, no Vit. K, no eye drops, no circ (and this was an especially big one for him), and I couldn't find it in me to keep arguing wih him about this issue. I had to choose my battles.


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## alexsam (May 10, 2005)

For my first, we moved in my 7th month (so I didn't know anyone in the area, no healthcare providers, and DS being my first, I didn't really even think about homebirth, but would have ruled it out anyway). We lived in a little apartment, in a rural area (an hour away from the closest hospital). I hated my apartment, I had no friends yet, EVERYTHING was a half hour drive away, both sets of parents were staying with us which was a bit uncomfortable... I guess what I am saying is that "home" wasn't really home, so I had no attachment, inclination or feelings of security there.

For #2, we live in our own home 10 minutes away from the hospital. We have tons of friends and supoprt and we are very happy here. But I STILL am going to the hospital. My son ended up a c-section and I am just not comfortable birthing at home (I know, I know... but for me, I just feel I'd be too nervous about uterine rupture or a repeat of the situation that caused my son to be a c-section and I wouldn't be able to relax and my midwife was in agreement). However, I will be with a midwife and a doula in a brand-new birthing wing about which everyone else seems to have good things to say.

Also, my husband is an academic and a veterinarian at a university, which means he's very comfortable in the human medical world. This works to our great advantage because it means that he can't be bullied, the doctors are able (required







) to explain things in detail and he can evaluate for himself what are true reasons for interventions and what potenetial impacts they may have. He knows all the questions to ask and as soon as he does (and they ask about all the letters after his name), you can see a huge shift in terms of how human doctors and nurses treat us (which is really a lousy commentary and makes me really angry that you have to be a doctor yourself to be treated with the repect that everyone should have, but that is for another thread). Of course, I trust my husband and he knows what I want and will advocate for me to the bitter end and can explain in words I know and trust when something really has to be done (when he told me that I really _did_ need a c-section with my first, he was crying because he knew it had to be done but that it was not what I planned or wanted). So, I feel comfortable entering into a hospital knowing that it is not a mystery or a place where we will be bullied into anything.


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## Telle Bear (Jul 28, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *YesandNo* 
I had no interest in a homebirth for myself, and I don't think a homebirth in inherently better (which seems to be the assumption of this thread). They're fine of course, just not for me.

I consider hospital births to be an important health insurance benefit. I know the birth experience varies for each woman, and I did not know how I would react to it, so I wanted to keep my options open. My hospital was great, I had a midwife birth and my room was equipped with a private tub to help with labor pains.










And my labor nurses and maternity ward nurses were so awesome, their wisdom and kindness and humor were a blessing to me. I will never forget the nurse who, right after the birth and BFing DD for the first time, made me a PB&J sandwich when she saw that the cafeteria screwed up and sent a non-vegetarian dinner. Yeah, my husband or mom could have done that, but they were enraptured by the baby (fair enough!) and to be honest I wanted a moment to be "off" emotionally anyway.









I agree with all that....

I loved just being with my baby and not worrying about dinner, cleaning, etc...

I was really lucky to have a GREAT hospital....they encourage co-sleeping, no circ, bf (it's a no pacifier hospital). It was awesome!!!


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## SheepNumber97245 (Apr 20, 2007)

I would have had a homebirth... if i had a home. :/ I was homeless at the time...

Also, I couldn't find a midwife in my area that would take my insurance, other than the nurse midwifes at a hospital. So i had my baby in the hospital, but with a WONDERFUL nurse midwife. I did it completely natural and was not pressured to take drugs.


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## SheepNumber97245 (Apr 20, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *applejuice* 
This statement always amazes me.

Of course you paid something. What do you think your insurance premiums are for? Even if you or your DP are covered by a group insurance plan at work, the money that the company pays for you and your family is part of your compensation which is not taxed.

So, you did not have your baby for free at the hospital. You may not have written a big check, but you paid for it, and so did everyone who pays into your private or group insurance plan.

Nothing is free. Get over that idea now.

I didn't pay anything either, actually. It's called Medicaid.


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## ann_of_loxley (Sep 21, 2007)

I had a hospital birth for a few reasons:

1). We lived in a small one bedroom flat...it was also not the most erm...friendly place...I mean, we live in a proper house now...we dont have damp on our walls...etc... I was glad to move out of there shortly after our son was born...Sure I could have had my baby there was I was embarrassed even to invite friends over...and

2). I figured homebirths were messy...our house was messy enough (even with my OCD)...I didnt want to add to its problems...and

3). I just didnt know as much then! I was also a differnt mother then. Lets just say I am way more crunchy now than I was then! lol

But in the end...I was glad I had a hospital birth. I would have ended up there anyhow! - My son was breech and near 11lbs...birthing that naturally as my first child is not something, even now with all my crunchy self and knowledge, that I would not have attempted.

But...I will be trying for HBAC next time around...we should be TTC soon - I am so looking forward to it!


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## 3pink1blue (Jun 23, 2008)

With my first, i didn't know it was an option. I didn't know you were *supposed* to see a doctor either... I just thought you were pregnant, then you went to a hospital when you went into labor.

With my second, I lived in a place where I never would have felt comfortable with homebirth. They ended up inducing and it was quite a negative experience but I am okay with it now.

I really wanted a homebirth with my third but was just too afraid. They ended up inducing due to size but I had no trouble birthing her, no tears or anything (she was 9lb 10oz.)

So when I found out I was pregnant with this one, Iw as like, hey, let's just do it at home. I mean, if I could have a nearly 10 pound child, in a hospital, with no tearing or anything, heck why not just have it here? So we are tentatively planning it now.


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## wannabe (Jul 4, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *~sweet pea~* 
I think you have to _really love_ the idea of giving birth at home or _really hate_ hospitals. I don't fall into either category and truthfully, the idea of giving birth _at my house_ just isn't appealing to me. I'd prefer the hospital shower to my own shower (where the hot water runs out after fifteen minutes), and the hospital jacuzzi to my 1960s tiny tub or a kiddie pool. Yes, call me a prima donna, but if I'm going to drip, poop, bleed, or gush in any significant quantities, I'd rather it be on hospital linens and linoleum, not my own sheets (and mattress pad cover, and mattress pad) and hardwood floors. For me, babymoon begins with _someone else_ handling this aspect of clean-up because I don't find it romantic at all.

That, exactly! And then, for my second, after I knew what contractions felt like, I needed to be in the hospital in case I needed drugs.


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## EvansMomma (Mar 7, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Veritaserum* 
Because I didn't know better.









At the time I had my hospital birth I thought only hippies or people with a death wish chose to give birth at home because "everybody knows" hospitals are the safest place to have a baby.









After a really crappy, unsafe birth I actually did some research. Initially dh was NOT comfortable with home birth. I simply continued to educate him. Eventually he realized it was wrong of him to ask me to have a hospital birth I felt to be unsafe and potentially violating and since home birth IS safe he should support me in what I wanted to do.









Exactly this.
I had no idea that "normal" people could HB, I thought it was crazy talk.
I mean...HOW do you have babies withOUT a trained OB?? Crazy talk right?









But after my first, I learned a lot about birthing and decided if we did this crazy pregnancy thing again, it'd be at home. DH - not so much with the convinced, but over time he came around and now we're BOTH super psyched for it.


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## KingsDaughter76 (May 25, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *newmama8824* 
Because I found a wonderful midwife and she only delivered at this one hospital, which was a great hospital as well. My birth went just as I had planned. Nothing like the stereotypical bossy nurses barging in left and right, or monitoring or being told when to push. I just kinda did my own thing... Alone in my room with my doula and myself. It was more than I could have imagined.


Yup





















Same expierence here! Plus I hemmoraged before twice so I feel safer in the hospital.


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## WriterMom2be (Feb 4, 2008)

I really don't get where this poster is coming from. She's saying that it would make more financial sense to pay premiums (or taxes) and then pay more out of pocket on top of your premiums for a home birth? Or is she saying people should forgo medical insurance? If you did that and ran into a complication you could be stuck with a hospital bill for 20 grand plus a home birth bill of 3 to 6 grand. I hate paying premiums but insurance is worth it-- for instance my emergency appendectomy cost 10 grand.

I didn't have my heart set on a home birth but I did look into it. My husband was too afraid and we couldn't afford it. I will get a midwife next time since my OB was awful during the birth (acted like he didn't want to be there and made snide remarks and cut me even though I had asked him not to.) The nurses were great and I pushed the babe out in 15 mins.


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## georgia (Jan 12, 2003)

Hey, everyone







Several posts have been removed that were off-topic to the original poster's question:

Quote:

*Why did you have a hospital birth?*
Let's focus on this topic and take personally-directed commentary to PM. Please utilize the report feature if you see posts that you believe to be problematic. Thanks!


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## Arwyn (Sep 9, 2004)

I have removed several posts from this thread. Please take a moment to review the User Agreement, especially:

Quote:

MDC serves an online community of parents, families, and parent, child and family advocates considering, learning, practicing, and advocating attachment parenting and natural family living. Our discussions concern the real world of mothering and are first and foremost, for support, information, and community. Mothering invites you to read and participate in the discussions. In doing so we ask that you agree to respect and uphold the integrity of this community. Through your direct or indirect participation here you agree to make a personal effort to maintain a comfortable and respectful atmosphere for our guests and members.

Quote:

Do not post to a thread to take direct issue with a member. If you feel a member has posted or behaved inappropriately in a discussion, communicate directly with the member, moderator or administrator privately and refrain from potentially defaming discussion in a thread.
Thank you.


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## avivaelona (Jun 24, 2005)

Well darn, I lost a post when the thread got closed that was a really helpful and well written examination for me of why I was planning a hospital birth and my ambivalence about it. So um thanks for the thread even if no one else gets to see the answer it helped me think it through.

I guess short form: Birth 1 was in big teaching hospital with NICU an hour away because I went into labor at 19 weeks. Birth 2 was at local hospital with OB because I requested an elective induction due to extreme anxiety. Birth 3 is planned at different local hospital with a reputation for having an NCB supportive environment with a CNM.

Reasons:
1) Can't see birthing at *my* house, though if I could birth at someone elses I'd consider it. I love my house, but its cluttery and small, and after two traumatic births I don't think I can completely trust that I could have an untraumatic birth and I don't want to bring trauma into my home. (or the mess...I bled profusely with my second...just short of needing a transfusion)

2) I do want access to pain meds despite the fact that I think I could go without if there weren't intervening factors. I would rather have an epidural than be out of my mind with pain. Both previous births did have intervening factors that meant I was in uncontrollable pain and while I trust that given a normal birth I won't be, I don't want to be without the option.

3) If something did go wrong in winter (when I'm due) we could be as much as an hours drive from the nearest hospital if there is snow.

4) I would have had trouble in my home for the first day after giving birth due to the distance and staircase from bathroom to bedroom.

The reasons I wish though that there was an option (say a midwife run birthing center that was both very homelike and yet very close to the hospital) is that I very much do not want a c-section, and I feel the risks are greater in a hospital, I feel a bit panicky and triggered in a hospital environment in general, and I am absolutely terrified, even phobic about them taking the baby away from me for any reason whatsoever.

I hope that birthing in the hospital I've chosen which is known to be mother and baby friendly will help me avoid those risks but honestly the last one has me constantly reevalutating whether I really do want to stay home. Its a very strong fear. So far the answer is no, but I don't promise not to change my mind when I get close.


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## Materfamilias (Feb 22, 2008)

Actually, it would be cool if there was a sticky for women who have to/want to give birth in hospitals for whatever reason. Every other option is up there in the sticky section.
I don't think this necessarily implies that we who must birth in hospital are any less crunchily-inclined than others here. Even though I want a HB I can't have one, for reasons I've set out earlier, but I don't think I should have to feel like a red-haired stepchild because of it, you know?
I'm sure this has come up before, and I understand there may be reasons for this that I'm not seeing, but could we maybe get a hospital birth sticky, pretty please?


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## momileigh (Oct 29, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Materfamilias* 
I don't think I should have to feel like a red-haired stepchild because of it

Just counting down the minutes before an actual red-headed stepchild takes offense to this comment...


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## RobbyRe (May 31, 2005)

All four of mine have been hospital births, for various reasons, as will our fifth when he finally decides to make his appearance (due July 4). At this point, it is because I choose to have hospital births, although I have considered HB with at least one of my older ones...after a long induction w/ my first, and a horrible time w/ it (although I did manage to deliver vaginally), I seriously considered a HB with my 2nd. My then husband was not for it, though. And I didn't feel like fighting for it, b/c it wasn't that huge of an issue for me ultimately. I did hire a doula, and had a very supportive OB for that birth, and did end up with a completely unmedicated, non-intervention hospital birth (I will admit it helped that dd2 was in a hurry, and born less than 40 min. after we walked into the hospital, less than 5 hrs total labor). She was the one who should have been my HB, and would have been great.







She's also my only one who was born in another state (WI), where it would have been easier to find a HBMW. My 3rd and 4th, and soon my 5th, were, and will be, hospital births, by my choice.
Some of the reasons for me choosing hospital births include at least twice we were living with family, and even though I have had one amazingly wonderful unmedicated birth, I have decided I do like to have access to the epidural. It also influences my decision that I live in a state where HB are harder to come by (MO). I don't feel like fighting the system or going underground for one, it's just not my thing. I *do* support women having a choice in the matter, and think that HB are a viable option for many people. I also think that hospital births aren't always horrible, and many times it's more about the mother being educated about her choices and rights and having someone who can help advocate for her, in order to have a more positive experience.
Anyway...the only birth I've "hated" (and even then I didn't "hate" it...it just wasn't a great experience)...was my first, when I was less educated, and less aware of my options, and had no one who could really advocate for me at the time. The others have all been good, each different, but each positive in various ways.









Robynne
Mama to Emily (9), Allison (6),
Ryan (2), Amanda (1),
and Baby Boy due 7/4/08


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## RobbyRe (May 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *momileigh* 
Just counting down the minutes before an actual red-headed stepchild takes offense to this comment...









Ha! My 2nd dd is a red-headed stepchild. Well, she's my biological child, but she is my husband's step daugther.








Of course, she's only 6, so wouldn't know to take offense to the comment as of yet... lol

Robynne


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## ~Stephanie~ (Oct 15, 2007)

This is baby #5 for us and she will be born in the hospital as the other four were. I hemorrhage after birth and twice have required blood transfusions.

We actually had planned for a homebirth with baby #4. I loved the idea of homebirth, had done tons of research and I had a midwife who was willing to deliver at home even with my history. She carried pitocin and we discussed eating the placenta to help with bleeding.. It took some convincing for my DH to come around, but he was trying to be very supportive and trust my instincts. At almost 40 weeks, I had a bout of false labor that seemed very real and my midwife and her assistant came. It was extremely uncomfortable. She asked us to turn off all TVs, radios and any lights that weren't necessary because the assistant she was bringing was Amish. This was not discussed with us beforehand and DH and I both felt extremely uncomfortable in our own house... Then that night I had a terrible dream about hemhorraging at home...there was blood everywhere, on the carpet, on the bed etc.. and it just kept gushing out. After that dream, I decided to go with a hopital birth much to my husband's relief.

Luckily my OB took me back without batting an eye and was very supportive. The nurse that I had was very hands off and let me labor in the jacuzzi tub. I had a great birth and did end up with a bad hemorrhage which required a manual D&C by my doctor (I didn't want to be put under due to breastfeeding.)

So when we found out we were pregnant again, we decided right away that we would stick with my low intervention OB and do another hospital birth. For me, being in the hospital seems more relaxing than being at home. I would be worried about laundry, the kids, making meals etc.. At the hospital I can let someone else worry about all of that and just concentrate on healing and bonding with my LO.

I completely respect moms who choose to have a homebirth and I feel a little envious when I hear their wonderful stories, but for us a hospital birth is the choice we will be making.

Good luck with your decision!


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## ~sweet pea~ (Aug 8, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Materfamilias* 
Actually, it would be cool if there was a sticky for women who have to/want to give birth in hospitals for whatever reason. Every other option is up there in the sticky section.
I don't think this necessarily implies that we who must birth in hospital are any less crunchily-inclined than others here. Even though I want a HB I can't have one, for reasons I've set out earlier, but I don't think I should have to feel like a red-haired stepchild because of it, you know?
I'm sure this has come up before, and I understand there may be reasons for this that I'm not seeing, but could we maybe get a hospital birth sticky, pretty please?









:


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## Arwyn (Sep 9, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Materfamilias* 
I'm sure this has come up before, and I understand there may be reasons for this that I'm not seeing, but could we maybe get a hospital birth sticky, pretty please?

We usually sticky threads that have proven to be particularly helpful and requested, although we sometimes set out to create a stickied thread based on perceived need. Please PM me or courtenay_e if you have a thread or idea for what you would like in a sticky about natural hospital birth, or send us a link to an existing thread you found informative and supportive.

Now back to the topic.


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## Materfamilias (Feb 22, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *RobbyRe* 
Ha! My 2nd dd is a red-headed stepchild. Well, she's my biological child, but she is my husband's step daugther.








Of course, she's only 6, so wouldn't know to take offense to the comment as of yet... lol

Yeah, sorry about that.... I use things like this all the time-- like "heavens to Betsy" -- dunno where these things come from. No offense to any red-haired stepchildren meant!


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## georgia (Jan 12, 2003)

Here are a few links (having a difficult time due to search issues):

http://www.mothering.com/articles/pr.../hospital.html

http://www.mothering.com/articles/pr...-hospital.html

https://www.mothering.com/articles/p...m-welcome.html

Hope these are helpful!


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## ~sweet pea~ (Aug 8, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Arwyn* 
We usually sticky threads that have proven to be particularly helpful and requested, although we sometimes set out to create a stickied thread based on perceived need. Please PM me or courtenay_e if you have a thread or idea for what you would like in a sticky about natural hospital birth, or send us a link to an existing thread you found informative and supportive.

Now back to the topic.









Not so much a sticky as a sub-forum for mamas who need to post a question about hospitals/birth centers. There's one for homebirth, one for unassisted birth, one for VBACs, etc. but none for hospital/birth center births.

Currently hospital/birth center questions can only be posed in the general birth forum, which is for all births. The result is that many mamas seem to feel the need to say things like "don't flame me" or otherwise "explain" their decision to go to a hospital. In the homebirth sub-forums, mamas can post their questions without having to "explain" their homebirth choice. Maybe it's intentional and maybe it's not, but the current set-up is a little discriminatory against hospital/birth center choices. I can see where hosp/BC might be considered "less" natural to some MDC'rs, but there are a lot of mamas that try to achieve a NCB in those settings and it's kind of sad to make them feel inferior.

This current thread is a perfect example of a thread that would belong in that sub-forum.

I would have pm'd this to you Arwyn, but that would have been read only by you and I was curious to see if there was any other support out there for this idea.


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## EarthsSpiral (Nov 13, 2007)

I chose hosp over hb because of the cost. I have great insurance and it cost us $0 to have a hosp birth. I purchased an Aquadoula and took it with me!! My OB was totally on board 100%!


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## merry-mary (Aug 9, 2007)

These are really interesting!

I had hospital births with both of my children: DS born 2 years ago and DD born 6 weeks ago. Both births were extremely rewarding, wonderful experiences, and I was able to birth them naturally (no drugs, no interventions) in a hospital with a 95% epidural rate. I had the support of an incredible husband and wonderful doula. I credit them along with my OB practice's support for my births being as great as they were.

I chose to birth in a hospital because I was not comfortable birthing at home. I wanted to birth in a birthing center. DH was terrified of birthing anywhere but a hospital. We discussed this at length. I was torn: yes, this was _my_ body, but it was _our_ baby. I did not feel right birthing in a place where my DH would be completely anxious and uncomfortable. So, we compromised: work with a doula, labor at home for as long as possible, and have a natural birth in a hospital where DH would really need to step up and protect our birth choices and philosophies. It ended up working out beautifully: DH did have to intervene a few times to protect my wishes.

Especially with my first baby, I really enjoyed being in the hospital for those two days post-partum. Our nurses were wonderful and I had daily visits from an LC. Plus, the nurses themselves were great with breastfeeding - they actually knew what they were talking about! It was nice having someone take care of me, as I learned how to take care of my baby. I was *clueless* about newborns - really. So, I appreciated the nurses' help with how to bathe, diaper, swaddle and otherwise care for the baby. (However, this time, I just wanted to be home! I missed DS incredibly, I already knew what I was doing with the baby adn just wanted my own bed!!).

If I were to have another baby (and that is very unlikely), I'd birth in the exact same place, the exact same way. My births have left me so fulfilled - I can't imagine doing it any other way.


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## Larrysgirl (Jun 16, 2008)

I'm too afraid of complications. I've had so many friends who have had them and my first birth was not without drama or intervention.


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## earthie_mama (Mar 27, 2006)

Because I didn;t know it would be as bad as it was, and I didn't know there was another option. If I could go back I would have done all my babies UC.


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## box_of_rain (Mar 16, 2006)

My first birth - I was 19 and totally unaware I could birth at home. I probably wouldn't have opted for that anyway, though, at the time. It was a midwife attended hospital birth. 28 hours of unmedicated pitocin labor and 5.5 hours of pushing. My midwife was horrible. It was traumatic.









My second - 7 years after the 1st. I couldn't find a midwife taking clients so I was kind of stuck with an OB. She was alright, but I was induced again. Luckily this time it was only 4 hours of unmedicated pitocin labor. I chose the hospital because of the trauma I sustained the last time (and no birth centers nearby). Although looking back, I'm sure it wouldn't have been that traumatic outside of a hospital.

I'm currently pregnant with my 3rd. It will be a midwife attended home birth this time.


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## happyblessedmama (Sep 6, 2003)

I've had 4 hospital births.

#1 was a hard delivery.
#2 was sooooooo easy, hosp delivery so we decided to try a birth center for #3.
#3 was a train wreck. baby born not breathing, 2 weeks in NICU.
for #4 we happily delivered her in a hospital. Planning same for #5. I would rather the immediate medical assistance and technology (including capability for a c/s) is present vs. not, even a 5 minute drive away (which is what we faced with #3's birth).


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