# maddening article



## readytobedone (Apr 6, 2007)

i was doing some research on which countries/cultures co-sleep and came across this gem:

http://www.washtimes.com/news/2007/m...-102943-3667r/

here's my favorite part:

I recommended to Mom that she move the infant out of the marital bed, not only to head off later sleep problems with a second child, but also to set the stage for the next step: a definitive, boundary-setting talk with the daughter. Mom and Dad need to sit her down and inform her that her doctor found out that her brother was sleeping in their bed, and ...

"He told us that no child can sleep in our bed. He also told us that you must not get up in the night crying because we can't get in bed with you, either. You have to stay in your bed all night long, just like other children do. To help you remember, we're putting a gate in your doorway. If you wake up at night, you can turn on a light and play in your room, but your doctor says you must be very quiet so that Mommy and Daddy don't wake up. If you wake us up, your doctor says we have to put you back in your bed and he says you can't (insert something the child enjoys doing every day) and you have to go to bed early the next night."

Why blame it on the doctor? Because at this point, the child recognizes and will comply readily with the doctor's authority, so he or she is used as a transitional authority figure until the parents have their leadership feet on solid ground.















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i know it's john rosemond and all, but still.

OTOH, what i love about this article is it does a really good job of showing that our country is in thrall to medical doctors, to the point that a 3 year old will blindly accept what a doctor supposedly said, even when she wouldn't accept "boundaries" from her parents


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## columbusmomma (Oct 31, 2006)

I just read the article you mentioned!! UGH!














:


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## heathermarie73 (Mar 13, 2006)

That is funny, my former co-sleeping 2yr old now exclusively prefers his own bed which he got at 14 months, falls asleep many nights/naps on his own and sleeps through the night almost always. He also is addicted to a pacifier







but not prone to tantrums or wailing orcrying or whatever else that guy says. He must be the exception huh?:nana:







Silly article, co-sleeping is (great) for kids.


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## rmzbm (Jul 8, 2005)

Yeah...do what you will at night...just don't bother US.

Awful.


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## dogmom327 (Apr 19, 2007)

It's funny how for some people parenting is so inconvenient.


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## readytobedone (Apr 6, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *dogmom327* 
It's funny how for some people parenting is so inconvenient.

yeah, kind of makes you wonder why they just didn't get a pet rock or something.

whoever said kids were going to be easy?


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## sapphire_chan (May 2, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *dogmom327* 
It's funny how for some people parenting is so inconvenient.

Well, duh. Of course it's inconvenient for them, they refuse to consider co-sleeping.









I know that separate beds works better for some families, but I think that really has to be a deliberate decision after carefully considering the specific family dynamics.


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## readytobedone (Apr 6, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *sapphire_chan* 
Well, duh. Of course it's inconvenient for them, they refuse to consider co-sleeping.









I know that separate beds works better for some families, but I think that really has to be a deliberate decision after carefully considering the specific family dynamics.

yeah, it works better for some--so i hear









hard for me to imagine it, though. i know for me getting up and down 5-6 times a night would be out of the question. it would kill me. i would seriously become an insane maniac before dying of exhaustion.

the only way i'd consider NOT co-sleeping would be if the baby slept better out of our bed than in. otherwise, it wouldn't matter what DH thought, or anyone else. i'm the one nursing; they way i sleep best is how we are going to sleep. if DH doesn't like it (which luckily he does), there's always the guest room. or, he can start lactating


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## shanniesue2 (Jul 4, 2007)

"The Sanctity of the marital bed"

All hail and worship the place where the man gets laid! Because it's not allowed to be used for anything else.







:


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## marie1080 (Aug 5, 2006)

Unbelievable. Seriously, I cannot fathom how someone could buy into that trash


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## RTT (Oct 26, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *shanniesue2* 
"The Sanctity of the marital bed"

All hail and worship the place where the man gets laid! Because it's not allowed to be used for anything else.







:











That just cracked me up.
I'm not even going to read the article because I'm sure it'll bug the crap out of me. These inconvienient children needing our attention!!


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## superlori (Nov 28, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *shanniesue2* 
"The Sanctity of the marital bed"

All hail and worship the place where the man gets laid! Because it's not allowed to be used for anything else.







:

Hmm, well in that case, we better preserve the sanctity of our couch, the floor and the guest bed too! Hehe.


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## Honey693 (May 5, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *shanniesue2* 
"The Sanctity of the marital bed"

All hail and worship the place where the man gets laid! Because it's not allowed to be used for anything else.







:

So if I listen to this then basically there's no spot in my house or car that can be used


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## MusicianDad (Jun 24, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Crystal_R* 
So if I listen to this then basically there's no spot in my house or car that can be used









I'm with you on that one.









I guess our dd has sleep and boundary issues since she's still allowed to come and sleep in the 'marital bed'.


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## sapphire_chan (May 2, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *shanniesue2* 
"The Sanctity of the marital bed"

All hail and worship the place where the man gets laid! Because it's not allowed to be used for anything else.







:

Well, if we accept the premise in this song a marital bed is practically a shrine.


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## MusicianDad (Jun 24, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *sapphire_chan* 
Well, if we accept the premise in this song a marital bed is practically a shrine.

Yeah, but only freaks and weirdos like monty python!

(Yes that includes me







)


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## shanniesue2 (Jul 4, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *superlori* 
Hmm, well in that case, we better preserve the sanctity of our couch, the floor and the guest bed too! Hehe.









Gosh... sounds like the only place your babe could sleep would be the kitchen table!

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Crystal_R* 
So if I listen to this then basically there's no spot in my house or car that can be used









You'd better set up a tent in the back yard, then. (for your LO, not you







)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *sapphire_chan* 
Well, if we accept the premise in this song a marital bed is practically a shrine.

Gotta love Monty Python!


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## DoingDoing:Julie (May 8, 2008)

He says the easy way out is co-sleeping and uses the phrase "robbing peter to pay paul" I would think separate beds more accurately fit this description! The only reason parents stick their babys in another bedroom is because they can then ignore any of the child's needs and get more rest. :-(

"The second, but equally important, issue is boundaries."

I dont know about you ladies, but the LAST thing I want in my house is a boundry between me and my babies.

"To help you remember, we're putting a gate in your doorway. If you wake up at night, you can turn on a light and play in your room, but your doctor says you must be very quiet so that Mommy and Daddy don't wake up."

UM . . . That is pretty much just neglecting your child!! They probably model their entire parenting technique after this! And I agree with you ladies. You might as well parent a rock. Or get a dog.

"Even the generally limp-wristed American Pediatric Society has come out against it."

What the F*** is that supposed to mean???


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## sapphire_chan (May 2, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *DoingDoing:Julie* 
"Even the generally limp-wristed American Pediatric Society has come out against it."

What the F*** is that supposed to mean???

That the AAP doesn't recommend beating children? Sure sounds like the article writer thinks the AAP should be supporting something horribly abusive, doesn't it?

(What on earth is the "American Pediatric Society" I wonder. Is it a sister org to the AAP or is the article writer even more out of it than the article's content indicates?)


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## maygee (Dec 22, 2006)

Hmmm... "Limp-wristed"?
That guy obviously got into pediatrics because he hates kids. Every column of his I read is saying, just tell them the doctor said so. Wow. How groundbreaking. And if that doesn't work there's the boogey monster. Scare them into compliance until you can kick them out of the house.


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## babymaggie (Nov 11, 2007)

Good lord, that is one of the most ridiculous and disgusting things I have ever read. This guy has to get off of his high horse and stop looking at himself and other doctors as God.

So, are you all in denial about the discipline problems you have with your children or am I the only one?









The sad thing is that so many parents will read this and believe this crap.


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## MilkTrance (Jul 21, 2007)

It's good to teach the children to be mindless, authority-worshipping robots early on. It will make life a lot easier for them. Vapid, meaningless and frightening, but definitely easier.


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## thewaggonerfamily (Oct 13, 2003)

This is not the first poor advice this guy has given. I rarely read anything this guy writes that I agree with. As for the "sanctity of the marital bed". I obviously must not be a big deal as we have had one (or three!) nurslings in our bed for the last almost 16 years. (Although thankfully none of the teens or school agers are still in our bed...it'd be mighty crowded!) Obviously we have managed to DTD despite having nurslings in the "sanctity of the marital bed" since we have managed to conceive six children. My kids are just fine, my marriage is just fine, I am just fine. If I had to go get a child to nurse from a crib somewhere, I'd probably be in a nice padded room with a nice white jacket that ties in the back and my marriage and kids would be a mess because I'd be an evil witch with a capital "b" from lack of sleep. KWIM?


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## MyBoysBlue (Apr 27, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *thewaggonerfamily* 
... If I had to go get a child to nurse from a crib somewhere, I'd probably be in a nice padded room with a nice white jacket that ties in the back and my marriage and kids would be a mess because I'd be an evil witch with a capital "b" from lack of sleep. KWIM?

I've only got two kids and I know what you mean. LOL


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## Turquesa (May 30, 2007)

From the article:

Quote:

The second, but equally important, issue is boundaries.
Here's a boundary for you, Rosie. Stay out of my bedroom. It's none of your (or any doctor's) business how I, my husband, or anybody else in my family sleeps.







:


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## locksmama (Jun 7, 2007)

i love how he says
"Proponents of co-sleeping claim it assists with bonding and attachment and other such nonsense, when no study done by an objective party has found any benefit to it whatsoever. Even the generally limp-wristed American Pediatric Society has come out against it."
umm, hey idiot, ever hear of the Mother-Baby Behavioral Sleep Lab at Notre Dame?? didn't think so....or perhaps, maybe, uhm, MOST OF THE WORLD AND THEIR KIDS?? how annoying....


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