# What to do about kids holding food in their mouth



## Zhlake (Mar 19, 2003)

I am a home day care provider and one of my biggest strengths is nutrition. I serve great well balanced delicious meals every day. I also pride myself in eliminating the picky eater.

I have had many picky eaters pass through my doors and my no pressure tactics work beautifully. My rules are simple...you don't have to eat a darn thing on your plate if you don't want too. That is fine. No problem. BUT if you want more grapes (etc etc) you need to eat some bites of your carrors (etc etc). It works great. The kids don't complain about anything I serve, because they know they either choose to eat it, or they don't.

BUT, now I have a kid who holds food in her mouth. She has taken bites of chicken or other things, and will chew and chew and chew and chew and NEVER swallow. At first, I just said "Your food needs to go down to your tummy" and I just left it at that. I figured, give her some time, she will get tired of chewing and it will go down. Nope. I swear that girl chewed the chicken for 30 min. Finally I just handed her a napkin and she spit it out. She has done that several times since then with a variety of foods.

Any tips or advice on what I should do?For some reason, I hate her spitting it out. I don't know exactly why. I guess part of what I do with day care is help kids develop good manners at the table, and spitting food back out just is not a good manner! I have fixed all the picky eaters, juice aholics and other things....what can't I fix this!


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## Potty Diva (Jun 18, 2003)

Hi there!

Just let her eat without pressure. It sounds like she is eating to appease you. Perhaps if you asked her if she was hungry and told her she didnt' have to eat if she wasn't hungry. Perhaps this would help. I would rather her spit her food nicely in a napkin than feel pressured to eat, or in her case contiue to swallow.

Could you examine more indepth why you 'need' her to swallow? Aside from the manners part of it, it sounds like this may be a little of a control issue. You sound very proud of your accomplishments with other picky eaters (well deserved I might add), but forcing a child to eat (although it seems clear this is not your intentions) is one of the very many negative lessons a child can learn and will take with them for the rest of their lives.

Also, we can't 'fix' everything, and really aren't meant to.


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## Zhlake (Mar 19, 2003)

Well, but the thing is, there is *no pressure* to eat. She doesn't have to take a bite of any of it. At all. We are a pressure free table. Now, if she wants more of something, I would ask her to take a bite of something..but she is a nibbler anyway, so she never asks for more of anything.

And I don't force anyone to eat. Never. Maybe you are referencing the "try a bite of something else, before getting seconds", but that is very low pressure as well. If someone asks for seconds and I ask them to take a bite, sometimes they say "no thanks" and I say "okay!" No biggie.

And darnit, I know we can't fix everything...but why not??









I just feel comfortable with all the other challenges at the dinner table, but I just can't figure out how I feel about this one. Just don't have a philosophy I feel comfortable with I guess.


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## Zhlake (Mar 19, 2003)

You know...actually writing this out has given me a lot of clarity on the situation. She is obviously is not going to swallow when she is doing this...she has proven that. I can't force her to swallow. So either, I can wait the entire day for her to swallow....or I can hand her a kleenex. Sounds like the easiest and best solution for us all.

I am glad I came here to post this. Amazing what looking at the situation written down can do! The joys of working with toddlers never ceases to amaze!


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## mz_libbie22 (Nov 8, 2004)

How old is this child? My son has always done that with meat. He would just chew it and store it :LOL that was when he was younger, he's four now so when he doesn't want to swallow something he spits it out in a napkin. He has yet to eat a "real" piece of meat, like a cut up chicken breast. I think the texture is too...dense...or something for him. My advice would be to just let her eat (and swallow) what she wants to.


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## momto l&a (Jul 31, 2002)

IMO whats wrong with her just chewing and chew a bite of food? So it takes awile but it seems to me she will swallow when shes ready.








Does she have a sore throat or something that makes her not want to swallow because of pain?


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## mz_libbie22 (Nov 8, 2004)

Eh, I must of been posting at the same time you were. Yeah, just keep the kleenex handy. :LOL


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## Zhlake (Mar 19, 2003)

Well I could buy stock in kleenek right now. One of the kids has allergies and I swear I go through a gazillion a day.

This child that is holding food, is 3 and very independent. I will try giving her some kleenex with her meal and letting her do what she needs to do. I will see how that works.


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## mamatosage (Apr 4, 2004)

OMG----I did the exact same thing as a child with meat. I remember going outside to play after dinner and my brother saying "what are you chewing on?" I said it was chicken and he said "spit it out already!"
My parents had made me eat it.
I use to have the hardest time swallowing meat. I think it was the consistency or something.
I'm a vegetarian today.

Weird---this just brought back that memory!


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## Potty Diva (Jun 18, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Zhlake*
I just feel comfortable with all the other challenges at the dinner table, but I just can't figure out how I feel about this one. Just don't have a philosophy I feel comfortable with I guess.

I totally get what you are saying. It is really tough to look at how we feel about something, and not 'get' why we feel that way. change is gradual mamas


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## Potty Diva (Jun 18, 2003)

Ok, now this reminded me. My first son did this when he was about 2. it lasted for about a year. He did it with chikcen, hamburger, and any other kind of meat.


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