# Tampons for 12 year old?



## aniT (Jun 16, 2004)

My dd just started her period today. She is 12, but will be 13 in Aug. I had bought her a bunch of nice freshies pads just before her 11th birthday for just this occasion, but now she refuses to wear them. She found a package of disposable pads that have been laying around for who knows how long (probably since my last DD was born) and is using those.

Anyway, my real dilemma is this. She is on the swim team and while I am leery of introduction tampons period, I am not sure what else she can do and still remain on the swim team. I know there are the diva cups and the keepers but I don't even know how to use those so I wouldn't know how to go about instructing her. So do other think it is probably alright if I bought organic tampons and had her use them only at practice? I am just not sure what I should do. Thanks for the advice!


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## tireesix (Apr 27, 2006)

I started my periods when I was about 12, tried pads, hated them and moved straight on to tampons.

Don't know if this helps, try discussing it with her.


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## Ruthla (Jun 2, 2004)

Talk to her about what she'd prefer. I prefered tampons when I was in jr high and high school- but I'm not sure if I started using them my first cycle or my second. Had I known about menstrual cups then I might have wanted to use one- or maybe not, with public restrooms in school and everything. I personally find the cup rather easy to use, but learning how to use tampons was much simpler.


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## guerrillamama (Oct 27, 2003)

Try "instead" cups. You can get them at the grocery store, drugstore, whatever. They are disposable but much healthier than tampons, and I think much more comfortable. I don't swim, but the package insert says they'll work fine for that. I don't use them on my superduperheavy flow day, tho. Have been known to spill.


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## Joannarachel (Dec 10, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *aniT*
My dd just started her period today. She is 12, but will be 13 in Aug. I had bought her a bunch of nice freshies pads just before her 11th birthday for just this occasion, but now she refuses to wear them. She found a package of disposable pads that have been laying around for who knows how long (probably since my last DD was born) and is using those.

Anyway, my real dilemma is this. She is on the swim team and while I am leery of introduction tampons period, I am not sure what else she can do and still remain on the swim team. I know there are the diva cups and the keepers but I don't even know how to use those so I wouldn't know how to go about instructing her. So do other think it is probably alright if I bought organic tampons and had her use them only at practice? I am just not sure what I should do. Thanks for the advice!

I think a woman's choice for personal protection for her period is exactly that...HER choice...I really don't think you should be dictating what she can wear and when. It really should be up to only her.


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## lilsishomemade (Feb 12, 2005)

Are your worries about TSS? I started wearing tampons when I was 11. During the summer, in fact. My mom and I talked about TSS and how important it is to make sure I'm changing the tampon as often as I should. Turned out fine, I was old enough to handle it.


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## guerrillamama (Oct 27, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Joannarachel*
I think a woman's choice for personal protection for her period is exactly that...HER choice...I really don't think you should be dictating what she can wear and when. It really should be up to only her.

Yeah, but I think the point is offering her plenty of choices. I didn't see the op trying to "dictate." When I started my period at 13 I happened to be on a trip with my dad. He was definitely no help!







I had to ask him for money to buy those big honking pads from the machine in the public restroom... a horribly embarassing moment for both of us. When I got home and told my mom, she got all mushy but was no more help. She asked me what she should buy, and I was like, "I dunno." So I used the same pads she used for months, until my friends at school started making fun of me. (They were all using tampons.) So I switched to tampons. (Painfully at first, because I didn't know wtf I was doing.)

So seems like it would be great just to offer her all the options, explain the pros and cons of each, and let her experiment different things and pick what works best for her.


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## pumpkin (Apr 8, 2003)

I used tampons at that age. It really was the only option for swimming - at least back in the day.

It really is her choice, so I would just give her the opportunity to try out whatever options interest her. I think the Instead cups are a very good option at this point, I know I preferred them to tampons and they were great until I was willing to take the plunge and use a Diva cup.


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## Missy (Oct 22, 2002)

Quote:

I think a woman's choice for personal protection for her period is exactly that...HER choice...I really don't think you should be dictating what she can wear and when. It really should be up to only her.
Wow. I don't get this comment at all...









Anyway, the year I had my period (at 11), I skipped a few practices, but, by the time I was 12 I was much more serious about swimming and didn't want to sit out. The coach took my mom aside and suggested tampons. Mom talked to me about it, and that's what I chose to use. After the first one (weird weird weird at the time...), it was easy and allowed me to continue swimming.


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## Freespiritedjem (Mar 16, 2006)

This is maybe going to sound different, but just was my experience from Jr. High. I was 13, at a school swim party at the end of the year, and I had gotten my period. I was 12 when everything started, and had never used tampons. I didn't really feel comfortable changing into my swimsuit and going swimming, since I never used tampons, and wasn't about to with pads. Some of the other girls from class talked to me about it and told me, since it was light, just go ahead and change quicly and go into the water, with nothing, then change quickly when I get out. I protested and said it would be messy. One girl actually told me she was on the swim team, and she competed with heavy periods in the pool several times, and she didn't use anything. She told me something about being in the water "made it stop" and she never had any messy issues with it. I was astounded at what they said but did try it, and I was okay for that timeframe.

A year later I tried tampons for the first time, and absolutely loved the feeling of not having a bulky pad "outside" that felt uncomfortable and awkward and that I always worried about if anyone could tell in any way by my clothing or the way I walked if I was wearing a pad. It was very freeing for me then.

I always thought what those girls told me then was interesting, but I'm not so sure I would ever personally try it again. I just don't completely trust it. I would let your daughter decide what she is comfortable with, and if she decides to go with tampons, it sounds like you made a good choice with the organic cotton ones, and make sure she knows to change them regularly, etc.


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## whateverdidiwants (Jan 2, 2003)

I went straight to tampons, too (and to the Keeper in my 20s) and would've been mortified if my mother tried to keep me using pads. I was NOT one of those girls who wanted to bond with my mom over my period - or want her involved in any way - and I also wanted to be able to hide it from my brothers and fathers as well, which is harder with pads.


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## Missy (Oct 22, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Freespiritedjem*
One girl actually told me she was on the swim team, and she competed with heavy periods in the pool several times, and she didn't use anything. She told me something about being in the water "made it stop" and she never had any messy issues with it. I was astounded at what they said but did try it, and I was okay for that timeframe.
.

This was something else that my coach said, that the cold water slowed it down. And, while I didn't trust it during my heavier days, when the bleeding slowed, I didn't use anything during practices and never had a problem. Oh...and my mom was not one to actually explain how to use a tampon. She gave me the insert to study.


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## Tofu the Geek (Dec 2, 2003)

Do you think she might be interested in sea sponges? There is a brand called "Sea Pearls" that are pre-formed into the proper shape. Apparently they hold more than a tampon so don't need to be changed as frequently. There is this FAQ about Sea Pearls which addresses swimming and public restrooms. You could also buy her the appropriate sized Diva Cup or Keeper for her to try when she is ready.


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## aniT (Jun 16, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *whateverdidiwants*
I went straight to tampons, too (and to the Keeper in my 20s) and would've been mortified if my mother tried to keep me using pads. I was NOT one of those girls who wanted to bond with my mom over my period - or want her involved in any way - and I also wanted to be able to hide it from my brothers and fathers as well, which is harder with pads.

I wasn't trying to keep in her pads, I just thought it might be a bit too soon to introduce tampons. I started on my 11th birthday, (oh happy birthday to me








) and not only did my mother have my step father go out and buy me pads







: but she told the whole freaking world. I have told DH but I know he would never say anything to her about it. If she wants to tell her grandma I will leave that up to her.

When I was 14 my friends introduced me to tampons but my mother refused to buy them for me saying "they aren't good for you," so two months later after exclusively using my friends tampons she relented and started buying them for me. Believe me, I know how annoying it can be, but I am just not happy about all the bleach and stuff in mainstream tampons and the organic ones I have only seen in one size. (Which is not the smaller ones.) And as far as other options go, I haven't tried them and since I am pregnant I don't see myself trying them anytime soon.

Anyway, I think I will buy some tampons and see if I can find the Instead cup and see how it goes from there. Thanks everyone.


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## aniT (Jun 16, 2004)

Problem solved. She doesn't want tampons and will just now swim. Shrug.

That is why I was thinking it might be a bit too early.









Thanks everyone.


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## kids are grown now (May 30, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *guerrillamama*
Try *"instead" cups.* You can get them at the grocery store, drugstore, whatever. They are disposable but much healthier than tampons, and I think much more comfortable. I don't swim, but the package insert says they'll work fine for that. I don't use them on my superduperheavy flow day, tho. Have been known to spill.

Being past the age I need products like this, I found this an interesting product. We had a similar one many years ago that was made of rubber; unfortunately, it sometimes created a vacuum making it difficult to remove. When you pulled on the attached rubber ring to remove, it would break off causing some panic.

*I wanted to let you know that this product is made of mineral oil and another product. Mineral oil is unsafe to use.*

It saps up all the vitamin E in the body and also affects vitamin A, D, and K. It drys the skin causing aging and affects cell production. It cover the skin like plastic wrap and interferes with skin's ability to breathe and clogs pores.

Mineral oil is said to contain carcinogens and is linked with breast and other reproductive cancers. Being at an age of developing sexuality and new hormones, this age child may be particularly vulnerable to toxic affects.

Mineral oil interferes with ability to eliminate toxins.

Also if mineral oil is absorbed (which long contact with delicate vaginal tissues make likely as tissue here is much more permeable to absorption of all types of toxins far more than in other areas of skin), then it can cause inflammation of lymph organs, liver, and spleen.

Although your 12 year old is probably not having sex, the product is promoted as being clean and comfortable for having sex during periods; however, mineral oil is linked with condom failure for the reader's knowledge.

Mineral oil is widely used in body care products, such as lotions. It probably is safer to use natural products from health food stores and coops and for your daughter sea sponges or organic tampons.


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## aniT (Jun 16, 2004)

Thanks for that information!!! I didn't know that it was made of mineral oil. We avoid products that contain it. I will look into something else... when she is ready.


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## DesertFlower (Oct 20, 2004)

The Diva Cup and Keeper are great, but if she's going to wear anything inside, I'd start off with organic tampons, as a cup can be akward to put, especially for a young girl who probably not too familiar with the inside of her vagina.


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## kids are grown now (May 30, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *aniT*
Thanks for that information!!! I didn't know that it was made of mineral oil. We avoid products that contain it. I will look into something else... when she is ready.

You're welcome..I'm glad you saw it since it appears your recent inquiry resolved itself. The other thing it is made of is polyethylene (I am not sure if this is a safe plastic or not).

You might want to research the other menstrual cups out there. The previous poster listed a few to see if they are any safer, but she's right It would definitely be easier for her to start with tampons if she is set on going with something internal. I personally remember having a very difficult time inserting tampons as a young girl.

It was painful and I was unable to insert them until after I had intercourse.

Good luck with the upcoming teen years.


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## Tinas3muskateers (May 19, 2004)

My dd has always used tampons too. I will never forget she had a friend visiting for summer and her friends started her period the day we were going to a water park. That child spent over an hour in the bathroom with my dd, neice and another girl trying to put this tampon in, lol.... she was scared to death of it and thought because she was a virgin she couldnt use one. Finally s he gave up and sat out most of the day at the water park. poor kid.


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## Sijae (May 5, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Joannarachel*
I think a woman's choice for personal protection for her period is exactly that...HER choice...I really don't think you should be dictating what she can wear and when. It really should be up to only her.









:

Let her wear what she wants and give her the freedom to try them all and figure out what works best for her. She may discover that one thing over the other effects her cramps and comfort and thats something only she can determine. There are instructions readily available on how to use any available products so I think she could probably figure that out herself as long as she has a basic understanding of female anatomy. I started wearing tampons from the beginning (12 years). Now I think they are dreadfully uncomfortable and use instead cups but I agree that a woman's choice of menstrual wear should be her own.

Laura


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## Sijae (May 5, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *aniT*
Problem solved. She doesn't want tampons and will just now swim. Shrug.

That is why I was thinking it might be a bit too early.









Thanks everyone.

Whoops! I didn't get the whole thread read before I posted







Sounds like you got it handled. It did sound from your first post like you were trying to dictate what she "could" use but I see that's not what you meant. I'm a few years off from dealing with this myself as my daughter just turned 4.

Laura


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## aniT (Jun 16, 2004)

No I just thought it might be too early to start off with tampons because I was a bit older before I graduated to them.







And as I said, she is not ready, so it is too early for her.


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## PikkuMyy (Mar 26, 2004)

There are several sizes of the organic tampons. There are also two brands so if you only see one size, look at another store or online.


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## aniT (Jun 16, 2004)

Sigh, well I bought her some organic pads today and she is up in her room throwing a crying fit because she wants Always with wings. NOT ORGANIC and she is refusing to use them.


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## Tofu the Geek (Dec 2, 2003)

Ugh, tough situation. Here's what I would do:

1. Ask her why she wants "Always with wings". Perhaps there is some "feature" they have that you can find on an organic variety that will fit her needs. Maybe it's because that's what her friends use. Or something entirely different, but it would be helpful to know what her reasoning is.
2. Present her with information on why I did not want her wearing non-organic pads and print out any information showing dangers/problems, etc.
3. Explain to her the advantages of organic pads with regards to her body (mention the environment as well if that is a concern of hers)
4. Offer to spend some time on the computer and show her all the safe options out there. Make sure you have bookmarked all the web sites in advance and show her sea sponges, organic disposable tampons/pads, Lunapads, Sckoon, reusable styles with/without wings, Keeper, DivaCup

After all of that you'll either have to decide to tell her that until she's older, she has only the options you have provided (the reuseable pads or disposable organic pads) OR let her make the decision on her own. I would be hoping that after I explained all the reasons not to use the typical products out there, that she'd see the light.









Others will likely disagree with me and say that her reasons would be none of the mom's business and the daughter should be able to get whatever she wants. The problem I have with that is that I believe that the typical disposable products you buy aren't safe for your body and I wouldn't want my daughter having that crap in or near her.

ETA: I noticed on natracare's web site that they make a pad with wings. Maybe that would suit her if she wants wings?


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## aniT (Jun 16, 2004)

Thanks, I will check out that website. Her reasons are, she hates anything organic, she is sick of organic food and organic things and just wants to be "normal."


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## guerrillamama (Oct 27, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *aniT*
Thanks, I will check out that website. Her reasons are, she hates anything organic, she is sick of organic food and organic things and just wants to be "normal."









Oh mama, let it go! I don't have a teen, I'm just saying as a layperson, if that's her reasoning, drop this issue like a hot potato. If she is sick of the organic stuff, you canNOT press the issue when it comes to the most personal, most intimate product. You must respect her space on this. She's got a lot of periods ahead of her and she's already off to a better start than most of us, so please, just let it go.


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## Tofu the Geek (Dec 2, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *aniT*
Thanks, I will check out that website. Her reasons are, she hates anything organic, she is sick of organic food and organic things and just wants to be "normal."









Here's a link http://www.natracare.com/products/feminine_products.htm You have to scroll down and you'll see their "Ultra Pads with wings" listed.

As for your daughter, it sounds like she likely understands the benefits of organic for her safety? but is currently just sick of having a family that does things differently than her friends' families? If she truely understands why the products you are suggesting are better for her body AND understands how other products could be harmful to her, then I don't know what to say.







The chemicals and lack of breathability in most of these products could have a long term effect on her health, and personally I don't think it's something I could let go.


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## aniT (Jun 16, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *TechnoGranola*
Here's a link http://www.natracare.com/products/feminine_products.htm You have to scroll down and you'll see their "Ultra Pads with wings" listed.

As for your daughter, it sounds like she likely understands the benefits of organic for her safety? but is currently just sick of having a family that does things differently than her friends' families? If she truely understands why the products you are suggesting are better for her body AND understands how other products could be harmful to her, then I don't know what to say.







The chemicals and lack of breathability in most of these products could have a long term effect on her health, and personally I don't think it's something I could let go.

Thanks. I think I will do as you suggested earlier and find all options and present them to her and see what she thinks she would like best.

And letting the issue go could effect her health in the long run.


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## tireesix (Apr 27, 2006)

Can't believe I am going to say this but........

Could you buy some real nice organic ones and the type she wants and just ask her to at least try the organic ones. Then, if, she understands the risks associated with the nasty ones etc but still wants to use them then let her. Difficult as it may be it is her body and her choice to do with it as she will.

She might decide she prefers the organic ones anyway..........


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## JBaxter (May 1, 2005)

She's 12 and has her period. I know if someone told me what type of pad/tampon to used I would rebel and im 39 ( when i have my af anyway) She should get to choose. Give her hormones a chance to mellow out and she may come around. I have boys 14 & 11 and it seems like after an initial "discussion" they do come around.
FYI I used pads for 2 days w/ my 1st period then switched to tampax regulars at 12 yrs old.


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## sweetangelbrynlie (Jun 23, 2005)

i must have been REALLY REALLY young for my age when I started my period at 12 because I had NO idea I had a hole to put tampons in







If my mom would have given me tampons, I would have freaked on her!


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## Herausgeber (Apr 29, 2006)

I started at age 12, and used tampons pretty much from the beginning. My mom had already been very matter-of-fact with me about periods, and how different women handle them, etc. I was the girl explaining to all my friends what the deal was, when their parents had kept them in the dark.

By the time my period rolled around, my mom had already given me a little stash of a variety of products to try. I give her mad props for this.


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## AmyAngel (Dec 3, 2004)

I started my period at age 11. My mom had already bought me a "sampler pack" with all sorts of disposables, and I used those up first to decide which kind I liked. I would have had a fit if she'd dictated what kind I had to wear, as the ones she used (uses, still) are thick, annoying, obvious and bulky. I didn't start with tampons until a year or so later, and then only for swimming. A couple years ago I switched to them full-time, but only for a few months.

I've recently switched to LunaPads, and prefer those but I still occasionally will use disposables (like if I'm traveling), and for those I prefer the Stayfree with wings. The Always ones are REALLY uncomfortable for me, that plasticky "stay-dry" stuff sticks to me and rubs. I have a Keeper but haven't ever really used it as I find it very difficult to get in right and uncomfortable when it is in. I must be doing something wrong!

Maybe this is something you can compromise on - like using cloth or organic at night or at home and the "regular" kind when she's out? For myself I wouldn't make this a huge issue, it's too personal of a thing for me. I'd give her the info, then let her make the choice. It's her body.

Also, I remember for the first couple years my periods were VERY heavy, and for me, I wouldn't have cared about ANYTHING other than preventing leaks, no matter WHAT the pads were made of! I personally now find my Lunapads absolutely do not leak at all, much better than disposables. She'll have to find what works best for her, maybe it'll be cloth!


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## mama_daba (Dec 7, 2004)

i don't use always anymore i use the organic ones or cloth or most recently i have been using a diva cup and it is awesome,
but when i was younger i used always ultra thin with wings and i have to say that for me they where really comfortable and i really liked them, now as a teenager i wanted to use cloth pads but my mom thought they where disgusting so out of the ones she was willing to buy i choose always because they where the most comfortable for me

she is 12 she just got her period she has crazy hormones right now and being 12 is really hard anyway, i would get her some always but i would get her a few other things to try as well so she could have options, i have heard of always causing irritation and rashes on some women and being pretty bad


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