# 5 yr old and touching my breasts...



## spirit4ever

My 5 yr old still keeps trying to touch my breast any time his hand is near them. And it drives my







: He just did it now, while 'pretending' to put his arm around my arm, he made sure his hand grazed my boob first







: I've told him that I don't like it and that they were a private part of my body HOWEVER, I am still nursing his 2 1/2 yr old brother, so that's kinda hard to stand by IYKWIM!

Is there any other way to explain it to him? Or do I just put up with it???


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## Igraine

I think of the breasts as a "holy relic" to my ds









He also tries to touch them on the sly. I have no problem with him watching while his sister nurses. The touching does make me a little uncomfortable also (and dd is pretty possessive of them also!). I explain to him that he had mommies nursies to himself the first 2 years of his life and that now it is his sister's turn. I try not to overreact because that just makes it worse for he and I. (When I am in pain due to teething with dd, I have snapped at him for touching me and he was so hurt he burst into tears. I felt like such looser. Poor little boy.)

Dh had a point about how all men are working their way back the the breast







. I wonder if all these nursed boys will be less boob-focused as previous generations, since many of them had lots of exposure or is it just hard wired? Another thread, eh?


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## spirit4ever

ooops! I posted twice, didn't think that I clicked on submit









Thanks! I guess I could just try to let it go, but it really seems to make my blood boil, he was nursed till 3, (tandemed for 4 months) but then my body literally just started to reject any physical touch that was towards my breasts and I just wanted to scream...


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## Ruthla

There's nothing developmentaly innapropriate about a 5yo touching mama's breasts, and some children that age are still nursing.

However, if it bothers you, then it's perfectly OK to put a stop to it. Explain to him that, although you're still nursing the little one, you simply don't like it when he touches you there. He can hug you, put his arm around you, kiss you on the cheek- emphasize whatever forms of affection you DO like to share with him. Explain that your breasts are very sensitive, and while it feels good to nurse a baby with them, it doesn't feel so good to have a big kid touch them. Reasure him that you can baby him in other ways.

There's absolutely no reason to "just put up with it". You're talking about a 5yo, not a 2yo, and you're going to get incredibly touched out and resentful towards him if you allow him to continue doing something that bothers you so much.


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## momuveight2B

Would he accept an alternative like stroking your hair? My kids like to snuggle and be close too while I am nursing a younger sibling. I try to include them in a way that makes us all happy. We talk about how nice it was when they used to nurse and about all the ways they have grown up. They like to lean in and kiss and stroke the baby too which of course means their cheek brushes against my breast. I am sure it must be really hard for them to see the baby having what used to be so special for them.


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## CherryBomb

My almost 6 year old daughter has recently become fascinated with my breasts, as well. I'm currently nursing her 2 year old sister so she sees them a lot and wants to touch them and has even asked me if she can nurse. I think it's a combination of jealousy over her sister and curiosity about female bodies. I generally ask her nicely not to touch my breasts and tell her we can snuggle instead. It usually works!


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## Pumpkin_Blythe

My 3 year old tries to watch me get dressed. If I turn my back she follows me to see me naked. She is obsessed with the differences between mommy and daddy and even asked to see my vagina yesterday. I told her that I would like some privacy please but she still would not leave. We are working on it, I wish I had some advice on the boob thing, but at least you know your not alone with the uncomfortable things kids do. lol


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## mamazee

My 5-year-old likes to touch my breasts. I used that as an opportunity to gently talk to her about private areas, and how we don't have to let people touch areas we don't want touched.


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## bdavis337

I totally agree. If you're not comfortable with it, 5 is well old enough to learn to respect Mom's personal space.


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## BlueStateMama

My almost four year old does that same thing, he'll absently pat one while he's talking to me - stuff like that (I'm nursing his 2 year old sister.) I think they catch his eye, not by virtue of being "breasts" but because they're just sort of "right there" and they stick out. I usually don't make a big deal about it, I'll just gently redirect his hand (I'll hold it, plant a kiss on his palm, etc.)

You're not alone.


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## lizabird

My 3.5 year old takes great comfort in touching my tummy. I'm trying to get him used to NOT doing that when we're out in public but I'm fine with it if we're home and snuggling together reading a book. He does always ask first "can I touch you?" It's cute, and I do appreciate him asking. He gets mad if I say no, but obviously very happy if I say it's okay.


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## chrysalis

when did isaac stop nursing? do u think he's jealous of his brother nursing??? does he see dh touching you, maybe? hmmmmmmm. my megh touches me sometimes but it doesn't bother me. cuz she recently weaned and it isn't annoying to me. but if its annoying to you, i totally understand. it sounds to me like that is where he got his comfort from a lot and he is having a hard time w/out it now.....or maybe just wants to get a little comfort he sees his sibling getting and misses that contact.


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## McMandy

I am not nursing (yet...) and my 2 year old still touches my breasts, sometimes looks down my shirt and whatnot. I figure, if I make a big deal out of it, he'll make a big deal out of it. Since I don't- he doesn't.. and so it's usually just a "oh hey breasts" and then he's off into something else. Same for my DD who is 4. I know they'll likely become more interested when this baby is born and I am nursing once again.

A lot of it is just curiosity. I have boobs and no one else in this house does (yet... since DD is only 4). Just as he wants to touch my big ol pregnant belly. It's different and unique.

He doesnt seem to care about the fact that DD and I have different "potty parts".


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## HappyGoLucky

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## Softmama

oh thank you thank you thank you for posting this!!!
I am in the same boat. My 4yo thinks it is just the best thing in the world to try and touch them "on the sly" so to speak. I cannot stand it. He weaned at 18 months so it's been a loong time since he nursed.
I am in a weird place about my boobs right now anyway (I haven't nursed in months, last child weaned in NOV) and I don't even like DH to go near them.
Glad to know I'm not alone with ds' fascination


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