# Am I completely crazy?



## MillingNome (Nov 18, 2005)

Or maybe just naive?

DD is having a Halloween party right now. There's a three girls and two boys. They are 13 years and really good kids. They are pretty tame. As far as I know, no in there is dating anyone.

Anyway, I thought the boys were going to sleep over night. Dd has a big room with a four season sunroom. Her door would remain open.

Dh was aghast that the boys would be spending the night. I was caught off guard by his reaction and now am questioning myself.

It turns out the two boys are going home at 11:00.

So, did you ever have co-ed sleepovers as a teen? Is my dh justified in his fears even though I don't think there would be any reason to be afraid? At what age would you allow and not allow co-ed sleeppovers?

Am I crazy


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## theretohere (Nov 4, 2005)

I wouldn't allow it at that age. I worked at a middle school- there are way more kids into sexual experimentation at 13 then you'd think.


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## Anuska (Nov 13, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *iamthesmilingone* 
Or maybe just naive?

DD is having a Halloween party right now. There's a three girls and two boys. They are 13 years and really good kids. They are pretty tame. As far as I know, no in there is dating anyone.

Anyway, I thought the boys were going to sleep over night. Dd has a big room with a four season sunroom. Her door would remain open.

Dh was aghast that the boys would be spending the night. I was caught off guard by his reaction and now am questioning myself.

It turns out the two boys are going home at 11:00.

So, did you ever have co-ed sleepovers as a teen? Is my dh justified in his fears even though I don't think there would be any reason to be afraid? At what age would you allow and not allow co-ed sleeppovers?

Am I crazy









My teens have been invited to co-ed sleep overs, but I wouldn't let them go. Its inapproperiate imo. I always pick them up at the end of the evening.


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## MissAnnThrope (Aug 14, 2006)

I think you are nutso... 13 is when they start wanting to experiment. I didn't have co-ed sleep overs after 3rd grade... and that was when we moved away from my mom's best friend, and her son. After than any boys that stayed the night were cousins.


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## PeacefulSeams (Apr 10, 2006)

My sisters and I used to have co-ed sleepovers all the time. Usually we would all just sleep in the living room all over the place.

I see nothing wrong with it. Maybe the boys could sleep somewhere else besides the girls room?


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## MillingNome (Nov 18, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *zenenlightened* 
I see nothing wrong with it. Maybe the boys could sleep somewhere else besides the girls room?

The boys would be in the sunroom. But I'm getting the feeling that the "you're crazy" is winning out


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## nonnymoose (Mar 12, 2004)

Not gonna happen at my house, either...


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## jeca (Sep 21, 2002)

I don't think your nutso but yes I think your dh was justified.


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## Mama Dragon (Dec 5, 2005)

No way in hell would it happen here. I lost my virginity at 13 so there's just some things I'm tightass about.


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## Phantaja (Oct 10, 2006)

I had multiple co-ed sleepovers as a teen. Like Zenenlightened, we always ended up sleeping all in one room, including my brother, so there was never any privacy anyway.


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## delicious (Jun 16, 2003)

i might be OK with it depending on the individual kids and stuff.

i say that, though, and i only have a 6yo and 3yo. lol.


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## UnschoolnMa (Jun 14, 2004)

Not a big problem at my house.







We've had boys and girls over. I mean, I have a boy and a girl so are we supposed to never have anyone over?

I'd have discussed it with my kids long before the party, and we'd have aired any concerns & worked it all out. We don't assume that all kids are hell bent on sexing it up, and we don't assume that kids aren't at all interested. We just try not to assume and we discuss instead. I was 13. It's a complicated time, but I don't think co-ed has to be out of the question.

They'd likely sleep in the living room with sleeping bags after staying up until 2 am watching movies, eating stuff, and playing pool in our garage.


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## TheBluebird (Dec 20, 2006)

I must be naive because I think it's not that big of a deal. Of course, that very much depends on the child. Me at 13? Perfectly safe. My baby sister? Hhhmmm.....


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## momaste (Oct 9, 2006)

I was allowed co-ed sleepovers, and for as virtuous as I seemed (seriously, I was the church-going, straight-A goodie two shoes girl) there was plenty of sexual exploration happening at those sleepovers. Truth or Dare was a popular game among my friends, who all wanted an excuse to make out but didn't want to have to initate anything.

So no, my kids won't be having co-ed sleepovers!


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## Ruthla (Jun 2, 2004)

I never had co-ed sleepovers. Old enough to sleep at a friend's house = too old for co-ed sleepovers.

Not that sexual experimentation can't happen with 2 girls or 2 boys, but co-ed sleepovers are beyond both my comfort level and my personal experience as both an adult and a child.


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## amydidit (Jan 21, 2005)

I have no problem with it at all. My DD is 11 now and has gone to co-ed sleepovers. Granted at her cousin's house, but they all slept in the same room and everything.

All this talk of sexual exploration... do you think there isn't exploration at sleepovers of all girls? When I was a kid I went to co-ed sleepovers and there was a LOT more experimentation at the all girl parties than there ever was at a mixed party. If it's going to happen it's going to happen.


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## Ornery (May 21, 2007)

Thinking about how "active" I was at that age, I would not allow co-ed sleepovers. Just courting trouble IMO. However, I have a very naive 12 yo ds so I could see how some parents might not think it would be a problem.


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## cjanelles (Oct 22, 2005)

Oh no. I never had co-ed sleepovers as a teen.

As a matter of fact, my dad stopped letting me spend the night with my brother (4 yrs older than me/same mom/different dad) at his dad and step-mom's house when I hit around 11 because he thought it was "inappropriate".

Then again, this is the same guy who said that I couldn't wear lip gloss at the age of 12 because he wasn't going to have me coming home pregnant at 13.


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## Panthira (Jun 13, 2005)

I had co-ed sleepovers at my friends' houses, and there was some serious friskiness going on.

I say it depends on the kids and circumstances. We had absolutely no supervision and if you are oing to have a sleepover like that, there should be *some* kind of supervision, imo. Be it a brother, sister, mother, whatever...


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## Ruthla (Jun 2, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *amydidit* 
I have no problem with it at all. My DD is 11 now and has gone to co-ed sleepovers. Granted at her cousin's house, but they all slept in the same room and everything.

IMO, it's different with cousins. That's "sleeping over at Aunt A and Uncle B's house" not "a sleepover."


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## merpk (Dec 19, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Ruthla* 
IMO, it's different with cousins. That's "sleeping over at Aunt A and Uncle B's house" not "a sleepover."


Yeah, that.

Must be from another generation. When I was growing up I never ever heard of coed sleepovers. And I was one of the naughty kids.


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## Momtwice (Nov 21, 2001)

I would not have a coed middle school age sleepover.


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## OwensMa (Apr 15, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Momtwice* 
I would not have a coed middle school age sleepover.

Nor would I.


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## Blooming (Feb 16, 2006)

Let's see at 13, that would of been a no go in my house (I think, I never really bothered to ask as I hated being home so why would I want someone else there.)
But as I grew older I had one male friend who BOTH my parents would let sleep in my room, on the floor, in a sleeping bag. He was not my boyfriend. But he was one of my best friends. My parents really trusted him. And honestly nothing ever happended between us.

At some point I had a friend who's brother was only 2 years older then us. He was good friends with my boyfriend. We made it a point to spend the night at that house together. But really nothing ever happended, we were in a crowded room. We slept in the same sleepingbag and held hands.

Now that I think of it, it was the times the parents didn't know the boys were there that we were "exploring".

If you know these kids and trust them then I don't think it is as much of an issue.


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## ~Nikki~ (Aug 4, 2004)

I attended plenty of co-ed sleepovers, starting at the age of 14 (first year of highschool). There was _never_ sex at any of them. And no suspicious gossip in the proceeding days, either, so I'm sure that nothing went on. Heck, I even slept with guys sometimes, the same way I would share a bed with a girlfriend. Totally platonic. Just laying there, sleeping, because one or the other had forgotten a sleeping bag and mat. I'd say 99% of the time, these co-ed parties were attended by a group of 5-15 close friends. We rarely had people that were dating attend the parties, and when we did, they slept separatly. They were hosted in people's homes by trusting parents, and we were more than respectful of that.

I think the only co-ed party I attended where there MAY have been sex (and I didn't see it so I'm really not sure) was a cast party for a play I was in. The cast members ranged in age from 15 to mid-20s, and there were some budding relationships between some of the older cast members...which is why it wouldn't surprise me if something happened.

At 13, I'm not sure if I would allow a co-ed sleepover. I guess I'll have to play it by ear if the situation ever comes up. I know that my youngest sister has boys sleep over from time to time, but she ONLY has boys as friends, mainly because she's such a tom-boy and doesn't like many girls. She's 9. My parents monitor closely, but the idea of anything happening is really laughable, knowing my sister's personality.


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## AsYouWish (Apr 20, 2005)

I went to co-ed sleepovers. Nothing sexual ever happened. And these occurred within two different circles of friends. It was just a bunch of kids hanging out, staying up late, watching movies, eating junk food. At one that I went to, the parents stayed up through the night checking in on us. They weren't all in our business or anything, but with a bunch of kids hanging out in one big room, it's not like there was much privacy anyway to GIO if any of us were even interested in such a thing. In the other sleepovers, there wasn't much supervision, if any, from parents at all. And nobody was doing it!







Sorry, the idea of it makes me laugh. And when it comes to games like truth or dare, or 5 minutes in the closet, it was all a joke. We were all friends, some even with cute, awkward flirtations, and nobody was going to embarrass themselves by even kissing in front of everyone else. And when we did 5 minutes in the closet (well the bathroom) whoever we were paired up with, we'd just talk and joke around and make occasional sex-noises for the benefit of everyone listening.







Those were such great times! I haven't thought about those parties for such a long time. Thanks for the trip down memory lane!







:


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## amydidit (Jan 21, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Ruthla* 
IMO, it's different with cousins. That's "sleeping over at Aunt A and Uncle B's house" not "a sleepover."

And explain how that's different? She's spending the night at her cousin's house, but not everyone spending the night is a cousin. Usually it's her, her cousin, and the boys that live next door to her cousin. They're all good friends and I have absolutely no problem with it.


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## Petersmamma (Mar 28, 2006)

I think it depends on the kids.

However, in general, I'm against it. I've seen tv shows and such (I know, not the best authority, but still) about kids in middle school with bracelets that are color coded by what they are willing to do (i.e. blue for a bj, yellow for x, whatever) and that LOTS of kids are into oral because it's not "really" sex. Yikes!

Also, at 14, I was a major horndog, as were ALL the guys I knew! So, from MY experience, I would probably say no.


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## MillingNome (Nov 18, 2005)

Well the night is over and one of the boy's dads stayed talking to my dh until 2am.

After reading the thread here, I would allow a co-ed sleep over again with some caution. Dh is a light sleeper and can check up on them as needed. They just stayed up late doing what a pp did- watched movies, ate junk food (three bags of halloween candy) and listened to music.

One thing I did not see brought up that I thought of later was just because it is all girls does not mean there would be no sex. Would I not allow a lesbian girl over? The answer is of course she could come over, for the same reason the boys could spend the night. Either I trust the kids to respect that I do not want any hanky-panky going on or I don't. If I don't, they can't come over.

All but one the kids, I've known for eight years. I trust them.

eta: Opps- I do see Amydidit brought up that girls don't need boys to explore sexualality...


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## Ackray (Feb 11, 2004)

You're nuts!


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## frog (Jun 1, 2005)

We had them all the time when I was that age (and older) and nothing ever happened.

I'd probably let my kid(s) do it, assuming I knew the kids invited.


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## jellop (Dec 11, 2006)

I wouldn't go for it. Although, in all honesty, I don't trust my DSS in that sense. So then, that goes to a trust issue. If I trusted him, if we had open lines of communication, if lying/sneaking/ect wasn't an issue already, if I knew most all of his friends well . . . I don't know . . . maybe. I just know in our situation, it isn't gonna happen. At the age of 10, he knew more sexual stuff and terms, slang and such than _I_ did! I've found myself SHOCKED at how sexually knowledgeable kids are in MIDDLE SCHOOL. I don't think all kids are guilty or even into that yet, but I think we should be aware that it could be an issue.


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## Dar (Apr 12, 2002)

Rain has had guys sleep over here and has slept at boys' houses... not a problem. I know her, and I trust her, and she's said she's not ready for sex now anyway... and if she was, she'd have plenty of opportunities when I'm not around.

Are you all really that sure that your kids are straight? I mean, I know that a lot of Rain's friends are gay or bi anyway, so forbidding oppsiste-gender sleepovers wouldn't do much to decrease the chances of sex.

Dar


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## Iris' Mom (Aug 3, 2007)

Maybe not crazy, but no, I wouldn't allow it. Really, I don't see it ever happening. Kids around here don't usually do sleepovers until 7 or 8, and by then, gender self-segregation is virtually complete. Then, by about 11 -- allowing for some kids maturing sooner than others -- you have to worry about experimentation.

We never had co-ed sleepovers as a kid, but in my predominantly Irish Catholic town, families with 5+ kids were the norm. Virtually everyone had brothers close in age. I guess I was a goody-two-shoes though. After playing "doctor" at age 4-6 maybe? I never experimented.


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## amj'smommy (Feb 24, 2005)

Now my dd is only 8 1/2 but when the time comes I plan on trusting her and her friends and as long as the other parents are OK with it I think I'ld be OK with it myself. We're pretty open about things now and I assume we'ld just be as open when she is a teenager. I think if I had cause to feel alarm about an issue I'ld bring it up with her and we'ld talk about it and take it from there.... but like I said she's only 8 1/2 now


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## UnschoolnMa (Jun 14, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Dar* 
Rain has had guys sleep over here and has slept at boys' houses... not a problem. I know her, and I trust her, and she's said she's not ready for sex now anyway... and if she was, she'd have plenty of opportunities when I'm not around.

Are you all really that sure that your kids are straight? I mean, I know that a lot of Rain's friends are gay or bi anyway, so forbidding oppsiste-gender sleepovers wouldn't do much to decrease the chances of sex.

Dar

As usual...







: to what Dar said.

Forbidding it isn't going to do much IMO. So much fear. I get the reasons to be concerned... I really do. (I did have my first child at the age of 15, after all.) But, for me those concerns result in discussion, finding what we can both live with, working out a solution (sleeping in common areas maybe?) and etc rather than prohibiting what could be a fun, safe experience.


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## Altair (May 1, 2005)

I had a GF in high school (same girl through college also, 8 year relationship) and she was always allowed to sleep over.

We thought it was hilarious, b/c there's NO WAY either of our parents would have let a boy sleep over 3-4 times a week in the same bed with the doors locked for 4 years at home! (weeeell, technically we started getting it on by 11 or so, we just didn't call ourselves "girlfriends" until HS.... so it was a lot longer than 4 years).

the best upside was that I learned a whole lot more about by body and my sexuality than anyone else I ever knew at that age. I learned it in a safe place with a safe person. To this day I think that is why I am so sex-positive and comfortable talking about sex to any of my friends or relationships. Because of our relationship, my sex life has been greatly enchanced. She's still my best friend and that's our favorite topic of conversation.


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## onlyzombiecat (Aug 15, 2004)

My siblings and I were not allowed to have sleepovers at our house. My friends didn't have several people staying over at once after grade school.

I think it would depend on the kids if I would allow a sleepover in my home. I would probably not sleep until they did anyway.
I don't think I'd be comfortable with my dd going to a co-ed sleepover at someone else's home.

I think if any parents (or kids) are uncomfortable with a co-ed sleepover at any age then the kids going home at a certain hour is for the best. It may be a false security though if the kids are alone together at other times.


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## phathui5 (Jan 8, 2002)

Quote:

All this talk of sexual exploration... do you think there isn't exploration at sleepovers of all girls? When I was a kid I went to co-ed sleepovers and there was a LOT more experimentation at the all girl parties than there ever was at a mixed party. If it's going to happen it's going to happen.
This is probably true, but a bunch of girls can't get each other pregnant.


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## HelloKitty (Apr 1, 2004)

Never attended a co-ed sleepover as a teenager but boy would I have loved to... ummm yeah... sorry... that's not helpful









Wouldn't do it at that age - younger yes or even older like after prom or something if they were all sleeping in the living room.


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## rabrog (Dec 20, 2005)

No way in hell it would happen at my house, nor would my children ever attend a co-ed sleepover at a friend's house.

Jenn


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## DandeCobb (Jul 20, 2006)

I've personally known too many pregnant 12 and 13 year olds to be comfortable with that.


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## ChattyCat (Sep 7, 2004)

I didn't really go to any sleepovers, where my friend had invited boys and girls. BUT, I had a number of friends, who had brothers, and frequently, they would each invite their friends over, and we would all just sleep in the living room in our sleeping bags. Really, if kids want to have sex, they'll find a way. I don't think that supervised co-ed sleepovers are contributing to the problem.


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## onelilguysmommy (May 11, 2005)

it would depend on the kids to me...


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## Altair (May 1, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *phathui5* 
This is probably true, but a bunch of girls can't get each other pregnant.

but then can spread STDs/HIV amongst themselves.


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## Jessy1019 (Aug 6, 2006)

I don't think you're crazy.

The cast party for one of my high school plays was a sleepover, and obviously, it was co-ed. We ended up staying up all night watching two (hot) guys play Jenga and then some of us went home while others fell asleep there in the early hours of the morning. Nothing sexual went on at all.

When I was 13, my (Jewish) boyfriend spent the night at our house on xmas eve so he could wake up and enjoy opening presents with my family. He slept in a different room, so it wasn't quite the same thing . . . but my parents weren't worried about anything "naughty" going on.

I'd let my kids have co-ed sleepovers. I'd also let boyfriend/girlfriend spend the night, same room, etc. somewhere around 16ish. I'm a pretty liberal mom.


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## MCR (Nov 20, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Phantaja* 
I had multiple co-ed sleepovers as a teen. Like Zenenlightened, we always ended up sleeping all in one room, including my brother, so there was never any privacy anyway.


As a teen privacy wasn't really needed







I was a teen who shared a room on a sleepover, not that I was all innocent to begin with, but a large blanket will give a teen couple all the privacy they need/want. We also knew we wern't the only couple getting friendly under blankets.
No way I'd allow my 13yo to be at a co ed sleepover.


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## anubis (Oct 6, 2006)

I'm glad my mother allowed me to have sleepovers with guys. Considering that 4 out of 5 of my best friends were guys, I'd have been severely sleepover-deprived otherwise









I did lose my virginity in my early teens, but at a sleepover? With parents around? With other kids around? Get real. I dunno, orgies just didn't cross my mind at that age. All of our parents knew us kids well enough to know better than to expect a sex party behind a closed door. We were no angels, that's for sure, but trustworthy enough not to knock each other up as soon as the parents had their backs turned to us.

Then again, I was also allowed to spend nights with my very best friend, who happens to be male, with no adults in the house at all, starting from around the age of 12. Guess what happened? Nothing. Cause, you know, not all male-female friendships turn sexual. Same can't be said about above-mentioned friend and his boyfriend. OMG gay kids, who'd have thunk? Not his parents, that's for sure.

I just don't understand why people can't trust kids at all. I wouldn't be the least bit surprised if the expectation of kids always being up to no good turned out to be a kind of self-fulfilling prophecy. I mean, if there's no way they can gain the trust of adults, why bother acting trustworthy? Mommy says I'm a horndog cause I'm 13, I'll live up to her expectations.


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## Leta (Dec 6, 2006)

I think co-ed sleepovers are fine. Here's why:

-If one of your child's friends has an opposite sex sibling, do you ban your child from sleeping at his/her house?

-If your child is gay/bi, same sex sleepovers may result in sex, so it's kind of illogical to ban co-ed sleepovers.

-So the cousins are okay? That's interesting. I know a few people who became sexually experience through consanguine relationships. And lots of cousins marry one another. In fact, my aunt did it with her cousin on my parents' sleeper sofa. (My mom was grossed out and threw the couch away.)

I went to dozens of co-ed sleepovers, from the time I was in my teens through my early twenties, and that's what they were- sleepovers. My friends and I used to joke about all the guys we'd "slept" with- because we had slumbered with many.









I wasn't exactly chaste. I had a boyfriend at 14, and by 15 we were anything and everything that didn't have the possibility of ending in pregnancy. But he was never at the sleepovers, and I was never promiscuous.

So it was no big deal.


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## MKJA (Aug 6, 2007)

It would depend on all of the kids to me. I probably would want the girls to actually end up asleep in one room and the boys in another. If I were to suddenly have a houseful of teenagers to worry about tomorrow and you asked me this? Not comfortable initially.


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## Parker'smommy (Sep 12, 2002)

Nope. I know from personal experience that usually there is sexual exploration going on at co-ed sleep overs. Also, when a sleepover takes that kind of a turn it puts a lot of pressure on kids that don't want to "participate" to participate. I wouldn't let my kids spend the night at someone's house I didn't know well either. And really, sleepovers aren't a neccessary rite of passage imo. If my kids never have a sleepover or never sleepover at someone's house they won't be affected negatively. If it's a big party I can pick them up late at night and even return them early in the morning if they want me to. No biggie.


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## frog (Jun 1, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Altair* 
but they (girls) can spread STDs/HIV amongst themselves.

Some STDs, yes, but the odds of them giving one another HIV are VERY long unless they're sharing needles.


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## nonnymoose (Mar 12, 2004)

Quote:

Some STDs, yes, but the odds of them giving one another HIV are VERY long unless they're sharing needles.
Goodness. Now *that* would be some slumber party.


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## frog (Jun 1, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *nonnymoose* 
Goodness. Now *that* would be some slumber party.

Exactly. I mean, given all the things there are to get worked up about, I figure we should do what we can not to get all freaked about things that are statistically HIGHLY unlikely.

If you're going to worry about your daughter getting HIV from another woman, odds are that it's not her sexual orientation that should be your primary concern.


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## Altair (May 1, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *frog* 
Some STDs, yes, but the odds of them giving one another HIV are VERY long unless they're sharing needles.

Sure, but I'm so wary of the view that teen girl's gay/bi experiences are so much safer b/c they can't get pregnant. There are many teens and adults that have STD bacteria and viruses living in their mouths that can be spread during male/female or female/female or male/male oral contact.

There are many things that my HS girlfriend and I did sexually that could have spread HIV if either of us had it. But we were very, very sexually adventerous and were doing things a lot of teen girls wouldn't dream up.


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## frog (Jun 1, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Altair* 
Sure, but I'm so wary of the view that teen girl's gay/bi experiences are so much safer b/c they can't get pregnant. There are many teens and adults that have STD bacteria and viruses living in their mouths that can be spread during male/female or female/female or male/male oral contact.

I hear that. I just balk at the "lesbians spreading HIV" panic I was (wrongfully) predicting.


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## MarineWife (May 1, 2004)

I spent many weekends when I was a teenager at friends' houses with boys and girls there. Sometimes sex happened. Most of the time it didn't. Usually, when it did happen it was between BFs and GFs who were having sex already anyway, not random hookups. I have a brother and we had the same friends. If our friends spent the night, it always ended up being co-ed because we'd all hang out together. It was no big deal.

I have let my 16yo ds stay at co-ed sleepovers at our house and at others' since he was about 15. He is very open with me about sex. I know when he lost his virginity. It didn't happen at a co-ed sleepover. I know that he's having sex with his girlfriend. She has not been at any of these sleepovers. He says no sex was going on at the sleepovers. He has no reason to lie to me about that. He has gay and bi friends. If I were to try ban co-ed sleepovers for fear that the kids would have sex, I'd have to ban all sleepovers.

I just asked him about the colored bracelets. He said kids wear them for show. Most aren't really doing anything. Only if they are broken, does it mean someone has actually done something. He said most of the time they just teased each other by breaking each others bracelets and getting mad that their bracelets were broken.

I guess the thing I wonder about is do you really think none of these kids have any boundaries? Yes, there are some kids who don't have boundaries but most do. They are able to control themselves. They aren't a pack of wild hormones who can't help but attack each other whenever they are close.

I don't see a problem with it as long as I know the kids, there is adult supervision and all the parents are aware of it and are okay with it.


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## Storm Bride (Mar 2, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MCR* 
As a teen privacy wasn't really needed







I was a teen who shared a room on a sleepover, not that I was all innocent to begin with, but a large blanket will give a teen couple all the privacy they need/want.

That depends on the teen couple in question. I was sexually active from age 15 (if we're only counting intercourse), and I'd have died before I'd have done anything in a room full of people, with only a blanket for privacy. I also think I'd have left if I had reason to think anyone else was using the blankets for that.


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## Blue Tulip (Nov 2, 2007)

I wouldn't allow co-ed sleepovers, either.


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## Marcee (Jan 23, 2007)

No girls except my neice spend the night at our house. Nor would I allow the boys to spend the night at any other girls. I remember quite well what my brothers were up to at that age and I am just not going to provide that oppurtunity.


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## emelsea (Jun 21, 2005)

It would depend on the kids involved.

When I was that age (well, all throughout my teen years), I had two male friends who were allowed to spend the night, and they were also allowed to sleep in my room. Nothing ever happened.

My mom wasn't stupid. She knew who I liked and who I "liked", KWIM? Those boys in the second catagory wouldn't have even been allowed in my room.


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## Shann (Dec 19, 2003)

My boys (ages 13 and 11) have co-ed sleepovers and go to co-ed sleepovers all the time and we have no problem with it.


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## Novella (Nov 8, 2006)

Well, thinking back to my own hormone-riddled teen years, I can't see that a co-ed sleep-over (which was never presented to me) would have ever been an event I considered an _opportunity_ for sexual relations. Let's see:

- other young people present, beyond me and my intended
- parents home

Hmmm. . . there were *plenty* of other opportunities that presented much, much lower risk of getting caught. . . and I was such a good girl I think I'll be entirely naive to my own daughters' escapades!


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## mamahart (Sep 25, 2007)

I'm goin with no problem and lots of supervision ie hey hows it going? boys on the floor girls in the bed.....
I think "exploration" happens on lunch hour at school...when you get off the bus...in the parking lot at the store/mall/theater...wow lots of places.
But at a sleepover? Where there are adults? No way.
Just a lovely opportunity to get to know the kids who are hanging out with my kid...


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## DiannaK (Jul 12, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mamahart* 
I'm goin with no problem and lots of supervision ie hey hows it going? boys on the floor girls in the bed.....
I think "exploration" happens on lunch hour at school...when you get off the bus...in the parking lot at the store/mall/theater...wow lots of places.
_But at a sleepover? Where there are adults? No way.
_Just a lovely opportunity to get to know the kids who are hanging out with my kid...

maybe I was a super bad girl when I was young, but my BF and I did the deed with his parents in the next room. (13-14 yo)

I'd vote NO on the co-ed sleepover


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## Artichokie (Jun 19, 2007)

I had co-ed sleep overs in high school and nothing ever happened. In fact, we had some co-ed "lock ins" at church. Nothing ever happened there, either.


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## spring978 (Aug 6, 2007)

As the Mom of 2 boys basically 13 and 17 and the step mum of a girl 13 I would say NO. We dont eve allow the boys to have sleepovers anymore when ther step sister is here.

Co Ed sleep overs just arent worth the risk.

However DS17 has a female friend that is more than welcome to stay here anytime Ive know her since she was less than a year and actually lived with us for a couple of years as a toddler.


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## LotusBirthMama (Jun 25, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MissAnnThrope* 
After than any boys that stayed the night were cousins.

Thats where I learned to smooch









And I know several of my other cousins learned more than that.....


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