# gentle discipline for sensory seeking kids



## That Is Nice (Jul 27, 2007)

I have a high sensory seeking child (sensory processing disorder? I don't know, but this kid has a need to run, bounce, crash, run...and no sense of fear for the most part...and is high intensity most of the time.)

So, I struggle with using gentle discipline.

My child has speech and motor delays, too. So, with the sensory issues and the speech delay, I find it very difficult to 1) get my child to hold still long enough to 2) understand the explanation I am giving, or the redirection. I start using the gentle discipline techniques...and no sooner than I've started talking but my child is running off again, doing something else.

Has anyone used gentle discipline in a successful and effective way with children with sensory issues...I know that many parents of special needs children have said (and I agree) that GD is even more essential but...

...this is tough! There is so much activity all day long and risky behaviors that I feel that I'm often physically stopping my child, sometimes very forcefully to prevent them from getting hurt flying through the air, running too fast, bouncing off the walls, jumping from furniture, crashing into things all apparently on purpose to meet an internal need.

So, reminding in a gentle voice for the nth time isn't working, and modeling behavior isn't really working well, either. And I look around and see other kids who sit or stay in one place longer. And who listen when you talk. And my child doesn't do these things.

Any ideas?


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## mamazee (Jan 5, 2003)

My daughter is sensory seeking. I've done two things. First, I supply lots of high sensory things for her - gooey stuff to play with, balls to bounce on, fabrics of different textures, etc. As much as I can find.

Second, I finally came to the conclusion that if the worst possible outcome is that she might at some point break an arm or something, I can live with that. Kids sometimes break arms and IMO it's better for them to run their energy out than live so safely that they'll never break anything. She hasn't broken anything yet and she's been jumping off furniture, crashing into things on purpose, and bouncing off the walls for years. Yes, it's a little scary for me, but she seems to have a better sense of what she can handle than I thought.

My daughter has some gross motor issues, but her speech was very early. Learning to speak early didn't make her able to sit still and listen to me, I'm afraid.


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## BellinghamCrunchie (Sep 7, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mamazee* 
My daughter is sensory seeking. I've done two things. First, I supply lots of high sensory things for her - gooey stuff to play with, balls to bounce on, fabrics of different textures, etc. As much as I can find.

Second, I finally came to the conclusion that if the worst possible outcome is that she might at some point break an arm or something, I can live with that. Kids sometimes break arms and IMO it's better for them to run their energy out than live so safely that they'll never break anything. She hasn't broken anything yet and she's been jumping off furniture, crashing into things on purpose, and bouncing off the walls for years. Yes, it's a little scary for me, but she seems to have a better sense of what she can handle than I thought.

My daughter has some gross motor issues, but her speech was very early. Learning to speak early didn't make her able to sit still and listen to me, I'm afraid.









:

Its still very possible to use gentle discipline. The first thing to make sure she has a means of meeting her sensory needs - gross motor in particular (since that is the most likely to end up with injury) even when she's stuck inside because of weather or whatever. An OT can help identify what kinds of things will help meet sensory needs.

We built a hook system over an entranceway, and I made several different sensory components that can be switched out as needed. Most important to DD seem to be a stretchy fabric swing which completely surrounds her body, a regular swing, a cargo climbing net, and rings (trapeze-like things).

A trampoline is essential for us, both a small one indoors and a large one outdoors.

Once you know she has appropriate means of meeting her gross motor sensory needs, then you can use gentle discipline to block and redirect, redirect, redirect. Sometimes with speech delays and/or inability to focus it helps to sing the redirections, with DD we sing, "Swing, swing, we swing in the blue swing, swing swing, in the blue swing" using the same words/tune for each common redirection. It sinks in eventually.

The other thing I've noticed about DD is that if her body is engaged (e.g. swinging) she can hear me so much better. She's not distracted by her body's needs. I can read her books while she's swinging, tell social stories, talk about safety, etc. Things I can't do by trying to get her to sit still and listen to me.


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## jewelsJZ (Jan 10, 2008)

My ds is a sensory-seeker as well. It is still hard for him to listen to me explain stuff but it has gotten better. We saw at OT and she gave us a "sensory diet" of activities to do at home. That helps alot. One thing that helps when I want to talk to ds is to have him sit on my lap and apply gentle pressure/squeezes to his hands, arms, legs. He can focus pretty well then. We also have a mini-trampoline inside and he uses this nearly daily.
I so very often feel like a broken record gently reminding him the same things over again and more often than I'd like, I sound annoyed and impatient. But then he gets it, something clicks, and I hear him telling his younger sister the same things I've told him many times.
I do think safety takes priority, however. He rarely hurts himself anymore, but still is very rough and crashes into others. I don't hesitate to physically stop him by catching him or blocking if he is about to slam into a smaller child, our small dog, etc., then redirecting him to something else, like his trampoline.


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