# Santa Claus: yes or no?



## goodheartedmama (Feb 1, 2007)

And why or why not?


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## stellimamo (Jan 9, 2006)

Yup we do Santa. We grew up with him and wish to pass the tradition down to our children. We teach that Christmas is a time for family and charity.


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## MissSJ (Oct 23, 2005)

We haven't done Santa yet and my boys are both still young. I guess if we're going to do it we'll do it this year. To me it isn't super important either way (weird I know), dh and I will probably talk about it the closer we get to Christmas.


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## Pynki (Aug 19, 2002)

Yes there is a Santa at our house... However, he just puts candy canes on the christmas tree, and brings the stockings. No way am I letting a fat old elf get credit for our hard earned money. If it fits in the stocking, Santa brings it. Otherwise... nope.


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## fallriverfox (Nov 16, 2006)

My theory is "Santa brings socks" I was raised with Santa and my husband was not. We are Christian so we will be hopefully raising our child with a different focus on the holiday....but it's difficult to cut all of the cultural references out. So, Santa can come and bring socks and the other smaller gifts, while any large gifts will come from family. We'll see how it pans out as she gets older.


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## Dreaming (Feb 8, 2004)

Other.
Have not given it any thought.


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## Stayseeliz (Jul 16, 2004)

We don't do Santa. To us that's not what the holiday is about. We're Christians and we choose to focus on the birth of Christ instead.


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## Arduinna (May 30, 2002)

yep


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## mightymoo (Dec 6, 2003)

Yup. Because its fun. Some of my most vivid memories are of early christmas mornings sneaking down with my brothers to see what Santa brought us. Something amazing about that possibility that all your dreams could come true.


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## alegna (Jan 14, 2003)

Yes. I think magic is wonderful









-Angela


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## lovebug (Nov 2, 2004)

i have such fond memories of Christmas and Santa! i want my kiddos to have a piece of that








however, my mom never ( that i can remember) used Santa in the "bad" way (i.e. "you better be a good girl or Santa will not come and put you on the naught list") i truly hope to be the same way


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## goodheartedmama (Feb 1, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovebug* 
i have such fond memories of Christmas and Santa! i want my kiddos to have a piece of that








however, my mom never ( that i can remember) used Santa in the "bad" way (i.e. "you better be a good girl or Santa will not come and put you on the naught list") i truly hope to be the same way









We had friends who had a son that Santa "didn't visit" one year because he was "bad" during the Christmas Eve service at church







:


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## ~Heyokha~ (Nov 21, 2006)

No. To me, that would be lying. I have never liked Santa anyways. Actually the whole American Christmas thing is rather unappealing. There are other ways to make Christmas magical.


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## SevenVeils (Aug 28, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovebug* 
my mom never ( that i can remember) used Santa in the "bad" way (i.e. "you better be a good girl or Santa will not come and put you on the naught list") i truly hope to be the same way









My parents never did that either.

I voted no.

I clearly remember being very skeptical of the whole thing from a very early age. My parents kept trying to 'keep the magic alive' or whatever, and I eventually (at age 4) had to basically trick them into giving it away. I did not enjoy being lied to, I felt betrayed and tricked and etc.

I don't lie to my kids. I think there is plenty of magic around that is not fictional. A butterfly from a brown dried up thing that used to be a caterpillar? Now that is magical.


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## goodheartedmama (Feb 1, 2007)

The lying thing is what gets me...Santa is fun, but I can't imagine lying to them for fun, you know? This is a case where I believe "to each his own"... I don't think there is a right or wrong answer.


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## ColoradoMama (Nov 22, 2001)

No. I don't want to lie to my kids. I remember pretending to believe in santa to make my family happy. I've heard too many people say they were angry or sad when they found out the truth. I've heard people say that it takes away the magic if you don't do santa, but I want my children to know the real magic of Christmas - the kindness of people, the way it changes people for the good - even if it's for a short time. Besides my kids have witnessed birth - or as we say in our home - true magic!


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## TinyFrog (Jan 24, 2006)

I voted that annoying other.







: I never believed in Santa (confirmed by my mom). She said Santa was an "idea" but that we were never told that he brought gifts. I'm not sure I agree with that since my brother believed in him. Anyway, she completely went over board with our stockings. We had three foot tall stockings that were FULL.

* WARNING - The following is just my own rant
Over the past couple of years I have struggled with what to think of Santa/Christmas now. I am not religious. I am not close to my family and this year I may not get together with family simply because it is a holiday. I do not want a holiday family. If my family does not want anything to do with me the rest of the year, why would I want to get together on what should be a special holiday? I would like to find something special to DH/me and go from there. Last year the stockings were hung, but we used them to put a couple of gifts from each other. We kept it very small. I am much more comfortable with that.
/rant

I'm not sure what we will do by the time we have children.


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## lovebug (Nov 2, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *goodheartedmama* 
We had friends who had a son that Santa "didn't visit" one year because he was "bad" during the Christmas Eve service at church







:

that is so sad









i dont see it as a lie IMO... i see it as imagination and allowing it to wander









but i can see how it would be viewed the other way... to each their own i right


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## USAmma (Nov 29, 2001)

Yes, with hesitation. We were not going to, and my dd picked it up all on her own. My grandparents encourage it. For their sake (the kids and the grandparents who are very old and precious to us) we are going to do it. But we are not going overboard with it, either.


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## Nature (Mar 12, 2005)

Yes, but only because of the magick of the season and tradition that was passed down from my grandmother. Santa doesn't get credit for really awesome gifts or anything like that. He writes a really personal letter that the kids usually figure out is from me when they're around 7 or 8. (I've been doing it for years, did it for my cousins when they were younger) He leaves little touches around the house.

Santa evolves here. One year he couldn't find a pen







and he borrowed the computer instead and left the letter on Wordpad. Then he changed all the screensavers on the 3 computers to alternate red and green and said christmasy things on them.









We do change some things, like we don't actually call it christmas. We call it Yule and we do celebrate Yule.So we do quite a few things for the winter season.


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## bri276 (Mar 24, 2005)

Yes, because I love the tradition and I'm glad my parents "lied" to us! I wasn't bitter at all when I found out the truth and in fact, I wish I still believed!


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## Jennisee (Nov 15, 2004)

Yes, because I'm a nostalgic sap.







But he only fills stockings. No big gifts left here.


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## number572 (Aug 25, 2004)

I answered "no". I'm split on this. I was raised with Santa & I have memories of getting excited & waiting up for him & being surprised about stockings, etc. & then after I knew the truth (about 5 1/2 yrs old), I pretended to believe so that younger sis's could hold onto that excitement for longer.

But I also have ideas that I want to teach a more genuine type of excitement about the holiday season & giving in general that won't be a fallacy (even if it was exciting before I knew the truth). Its challenging to explain.

I prefer them learning something about the general *spirit* of giving & how magical & spiritual that can be when you make the time & effort to do it & the mysterious feeling in the air around the whole holiday season in general... like families/friends getting together after a while of not visiting & the silence & feelings of peace that many people get excited about. Or the feeling of giving & helping people communicate & celebrate for whichever reasons they celebrate. & the traditions, whichwever they seem to love, I want to introduce many things then see which ones my family feels closest with. My sister has the tradition that they watch the whole Star Wars series including the remake! One of my other sisters spends a day with her dd making cookies & decorating the house. How gorgeous.

I'm not a mom yet, so I have time to ponder, this is how I feel now. I probably won't go too far into the Santa concept. I may introduce him as a *spirit* of sorts & leave it to stockings & giving, etc. However, I will try hard to explain Santa in a way that is accepting & respectful so if my kids friends do believe, mine will know that having that belief is cool too.

Ahhaha... all of you who have kids already are laughing at my naivete... I can feel it


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## ColoradoMama (Nov 22, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *number572* 
I prefer them learning something about the general *spirit* of giving & how magical & spiritual that can be when you make the time & effort to do it & the mysterious feeling in the air around the whole holiday season in general... like families/friends getting together after a while of not visiting & the silence & feelings of peace that many people get excited about. Or the feeling of giving & helping people communicate & celebrate for whichever reasons they celebrate. & the traditions, whichwever they seem to love, I want to introduce many things then see which ones my family feels closest with. My sister has the tradition that they watch the whole Star Wars series including the remake! One of my other sisters spends a day with her dd making cookies & decorating the house. How gorgeous.

Ahhaha... all of you who have kids already are laughing at my naivete... I can feel it









I don't think it's niavete. It's what we shoot for actually, but you said it beautifully!


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## Viriditas (Aug 30, 2004)

I answered "other" because ds is only 21 months and we're not sure what we're going to do yet. I'm leaning toward doing Santa stuff, but making it clear that Santa is just a pretend character we use to make Christmas more fun.

I'm really uncomfortable with the rampant consumerism and greed at Christmas, and I kind of feel like telling ds that this man exists only to bring him all kinds of presents feeds into this. Dh and I have talked about having a family tradition where we each make one gift for each other, and it has to be home-made.


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## ledzepplon (Jun 28, 2004)

Yes, because it's fun.


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## PeacefulSeams (Apr 10, 2006)

No Santa here. We don't celebrate Christmas. We celebrate Yule or the first day of Winter.


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## ~Mamaterra~ (Jul 5, 2006)

I voted other because we, my dh and I don't talk about Santa, I mean Jesus is the reason for the Season. The only way that we explain the archtype of Santa is that he represents the three wise men and their gives to Jesus.

The ONLY reason that Santa is even a word in our household is b/c the ILs' are freaking bent on making him the reason for Santa.

Case in point, I have actually had to physically tussel with the SIL as she tried to take my dd out of my arms to have her sit on Santas lap. She thinks that we are being "unrealistic" about Santa b/c "sooner or later they will hear about him from their friends"....WTF!!!


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

As a Christian we do not celebrate the Christmas season as a Santa day. We do not 'do' Santa at all in associating with Christmas. We do a fun day on St. Nick day (I think it is Dec 10) and learn all about the real St Nickolas.

But for Christmas, we celebrate the birthday of our Saviour. And everything we do is focused on Him. As a child, we never did Santa and I have never regretting it for one moment. My children have 'magical' Christmases without any reference to Santa and I am glad.

Besides, if it were not a spiritual conviction, I would still hate the idea of lying to my children (and telling them that Santa is real and delivers gifts to all the good children of the world and that sort of stuff is lying to me since it is not true) and the commercializing of it. Making Christmas all about gimme, gimme, gimme and what I can get.

We do have gifts for my children, and we do enjoy opening them, and the children do tell us things they would like to have (not, "Hey, for Christmas I want...", but "Someday, can you get me..."). We also have gifts for the adults (it IS a birthday party after all!).







But we do not focus on the gifts, they are just a part of our entire celebration.

Anyways, that is my reasons for no Santa.


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## number572 (Aug 25, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *cdnmom* 
Case in point, I have actually had to physically tussel with the SIL as she tried to take my dh out of my arms to have her sit on Santas lap. She thinks that we are being "unrealistic" about Santa b/c "sooner or later they will hear about him from their friends"....WTF!!!


Do you mean DD... b'c I could truly commisserate with your "dh" giving an objection about HAVING to take a sit on some weird guy's lap, yk?!?!









Well, actually I could commiserate with your DD as well... if she objected.


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## Starflower (Sep 25, 2004)

I love Yule.









DD is 4 and we've never "done" Santa with her. She knows about him in general because we have some some Christmas books - Dr. Seuss' Grinch book and a board book of the Night Before Christmas poem. DD likes them (the poem's rhythm can actually make her sleepy







).

My parents always send little wrapped gifts (weird little things like lip balms and packs of gum and fancy colored emery boards, pencils and little sticky-note books). They send them for DD, for me and for DH. So we end up doing stockings kind of, but don't do any big Santa thing.

Though DD recently found a photo of her older cousin as a baby sitting on Santa's lap -very cute of course - and thought it was her. So if she asks to get a Santa picture, maybe we'll do one just for fun. There is an open-air mall near us that has a dog-friendly Santa photo-booth.

I don't feel right pushing the myth onto her, but I also don't want to deny her the fun of things.

I would like to start celebrating Yule again. Christmas Eve for our family is usually more of a time to make yummy Middle Eastern food (falafel, lamb kabobs, homemade hummus, etc.) and hang with good friends. Christmas day is more of a sit around in jammies and maybe watch movies and eat popcorn and just enjoy being with each other.

I'm trying to become a reformed bah-humbug though. (I grew up in an alcoholic family with wonderful Christmas traditions and anticipation which usually ended up in a terrible screaming match and me having a panic attack and wanting to run away or turn invisible. So I'm working with baggage here.) Guess I've gone way OT now too. Sorry. All the Christmas stuff is woven together for me I guess.

Last year we had a wind storm knock out power to our house/area for 8 days during a cold spell and we couldn't even stay at our house. We didn't really do anything. We got power back the Christmas Eve and just ended up enjoying having heat again and being thankful for the family we'd just met who took us in - dog included! We didn't even decorate the tree we got.

Sorry about the







. I don't get out much.


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## MujerMamaMismo (Oct 28, 2005)

A shaky (and hypothetical) no because we're not Christian, we're certainly not into the corporate entity of santa (developed by coca cola) and we're not into the deception element of it.

Of course we don't have children yet and we have debated a lot about this but, as it stands today, no. (with a reserved right to change our minds)

My mum finally had to tell me that Santa wasn't real when I was 12. I believed for as long as I did because we were really poor and I _knew_ mum couldn't afford presents from Santa too.


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## oceanbaby (Nov 19, 2001)

Yes, because it's fun and magical, but I do feel that it is technically lying and I feel a bit uncomfortable about it. But there it is.


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## treqi (Dec 31, 2006)

Santa PWNZ! and thats why I do santa......


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## ~Mamaterra~ (Jul 5, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *number572* 
Do you mean DD... b'c I could truly commisserate with your "dh" giving an objection about HAVING to take a sit on some weird guy's lap, yk?!?!









Well, actually I could commiserate with your DD as well... if she objected.









Oh God yes, but this way is just soooo much funnier....I laughed so hard that I actually passed a little bit of pee....


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## ~Mamaterra~ (Jul 5, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *number572* 
Well, actually I could commiserate with your DD as well... if she objected.









And yes, she really objected!!! She was screaming NO but the B!tch of a SIL continued pulling her from my arms saying "You'll like it when you get there".


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## number572 (Aug 25, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ColoradoMama* 
I don't think it's niavete. It's what we shoot for actually, but you said it beautifully!

mmm, thank you... maybe it could really happen the way I would like.


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## UnschoolnMa (Jun 14, 2004)

Other!









No problem with Santa as long as it's approached in a _"character based on a bunch of different stuff...including this really cool guy back in the day"_ way and _not_ a _"real guy who can see you, and will actually deliver presents to your house" way._

I am entirely uncomfortable with presenting him as an actual currently living (even if "magical") person that will come on Christmas. I do enjoy the history and the celebratory spirit that the Santa character embodies though, so we can do that.


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## JustJamie (Apr 24, 2006)

Yes, we do Santa. It's fun.


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## SevenVeils (Aug 28, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *number572* 
Do you mean DD... b'c I could truly commisserate with your "dh" giving an objection about HAVING to take a sit on some weird guy's lap, yk?!?!









Well, actually I could commiserate with your DD as well... if she objected.









Oh, I completely forgot about the mall santa lap sitting thing. I do not and would never consider that. My kid on a stranger's lap? nope.


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## number572 (Aug 25, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *skyastara* 
Oh, I completely forgot about the mall santa lap sitting thing. I do not and would never consider that. My kid on a stranger's lap? nope.

Oh my gosh NO... I was making a joke b'c a poster here had accidentally written that her "DH" was made to sit on santa's lap... she meant to write "DD"... OMGoodness, sorry, I was making a little joke! I mean really, if her DH was forced to sit on some guy who calls himself Santa?... I dunno, I felt the joke.... he could be into that type of friend?? Thats for him to decide.


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## miasmommy (Feb 4, 2005)

YES!

Santa is part of our Christmas tradition, but certainly not the most important part.


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## Ruthla (Jun 2, 2004)

We don't do Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny because we're Jewish and don't celebrate Christmas or Easter.

I remember once Santa Claus came to my preschool. I sat on Santa's lap, and when he asked me what I wanted for Christmas, I told him all the stuff I wanted my parents to get me for Hanukkah, plus the fact that I knew that Santa Claus wasn't real and he's just a man in a Santa suit but I promised not to ruin it for my friends.

Once, when I was a teenager, I was in the mall with my grandparents during December, and my grandpa (60ish at the time) wanted to sit on Santa's lap. I think my mom has the photo somewhere.


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## marybethorama (Jun 9, 2005)

"Yes, VIRGINIA, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus. "

From the editorial "Yes, Virginia" in the New York Sun


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## nicole lisa (Oct 27, 2004)

No, we don't do Santa. DS has always known the whole thing wasn't real and not because we ever told him. We just never did Santa (we're not Christian and only have Christmas to the small extent we do because there's no escaping it in our society) and DS right from when he was about 4 started talking about the guy who dresses up and isn't real.

We do have several Santa photos that DS wanted because he loves dressing up himself. So he puts on a costume (one year it was a full Santa costume - beard and all) and we go stand in line at the mall and have his photo taken. I guess he feels the guy dressing up must be a kindred spirit.


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## LoveChild421 (Sep 10, 2004)

ds has been absolutely smitten with Santa (or ho-ho as he calls him) ever since he was a year old. Christmas is his absolute favorite time of the year. We have to go see Santa at least 5-6 times during the month of December and ds usually likes to chill out on his lap and give him toys for at least 15 minutes if no one else is in line. Heaven forbid some other kid is in line, we have to go get back in line, and try to keep ds from having a fit! He always asks to watch Christmas movies and walks around saying "ho-ho-ho" sometimes.

So yes, Santa is a staple in our house.


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## MiaPia (Aug 28, 2003)

We do Santa at our house, and have a lot of fun with it. Santa is not a huge part of our celebration, but something we all enjoy. Santa leaves stockings and one present. I also do NOT go for making my kids sit on a mall-Santa's lap.
I think our favorite part of "Santa" is tracking him on Norad (my oldest got a huge kick out of this last year) and leaving carrots and oats outside for the reindeer.


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## Potty Diva (Jun 18, 2003)

Try as we may (and we have for5 years) Kailey will not let us tell her santa doesn't exist. I think she knows (logically) that he doesn't, but she likes to pretend, so we pretend with her.

This year we have been talking about Christmas as beign the time to celebrate our faith in Christ and his birth, life, sacrifice.

Santa is just one "fun" aspect about the holiday, but no more important tht hot cocoa- wait that IS the most important aspect. Um, ok Santa is no more important than green and red ribbon- uh, candy canes? no peppermint. Sugar plum faeries?

Of fart, he is definitely no more important than waking up early on xmas morning!


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## Momma Aimee (Jul 8, 2003)

Quote:

Yup we do Santa. We grew up with him and wish to pass the tradition down to our children. We teach that Christmas is a time for family and charity.
We are very strong, concertive Christians and our faith is a daily part of our lives

However -- yes we do Santa -- with much joy and excitement. We also have a 9 foot blow up penguin and a very nice wooden nativity.







I love the holidays, i love the excitement -- DH says he married a 6 year old.

NO Santa is not the reason for the season, but he is part of the joy and majic of a child, and a momma's christmas. if you read a lot of the Santa history and literature -- he is based on an idea of charity and of course a Saint in service. Not a bad thing to teach my children about, IMO.

We read the night before chirstmas -- Grandpa reads it to us all.

we put out cookies and reindeer food (outside). and the cookies have to be MADE and the reindeer food made, then we get to eat the left overs







and the making then is time for talking and old family stoires (and a time for my aunt, the cookie and candy person, to spend with my kids telling of my grandparents who they will never know -- aunt and my grandpa use to make all the candy -- now my aunt will do it with my kids.... family carries on. it is a time for my aunt to get to really know the kids she only sees 2 or 3 times a year)

we also read the birth of Christ out of Luke and go to service.

we talk about the joy of the season, the excitment of waiting or the Christ child, and the importnace of giving to others and of chairty. it is a way to make complex concepts child-freindly. it is pretend and fun.

It is not lieing -- it is celbration and family tradition. and really, as they grow, they will learn there is not one santa, but that we are all expected to be santa to soemone all year long. that is also why we put a lot of time and effort in to the family DH's office adopts each year -- making THAT prep as big a deal as the prep work we go for our own family and freinds.

Santa bring his own gifts, not the really awsome stuff, in santa paper (each kid gets differnt paper).....

When i was little, we had christmas at our house on Christmas or Christmas eve each year, depending on which day my mom had to work. Santa came on teh right day -- mom and dad told me that he could only get to 1/2 the house each night, so he took turns year by year with who he saw what night, and mom worked the other so the other moms could be off on the right day too. worked for me







that is what is so cool -- it is moldable to fit each family. Like Santa found us at my grandparents the year our heater died on the 24th.


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## MaterBum (Aug 11, 2005)

Other: DD1 (4) knows already from hearing other people talk last year about the idea of Santa. She knows it's a fun pretend game others like to play. She just told me a few days ago she wouldn't mind playing the Santa game this year.

So, what we are planning on doing. Each child gets three small gifts in our family (usually a book, a small toy, and a piece of clothing). We are going to make the combined gift for all three to share (some wooden train set pieces I've been collecting off of craigslist) from Santa.

BUT, we will not tell our kids it is anything other than a fun game to pretend and play and dream about.


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## Pynki (Aug 19, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *cdnmom* 
I voted other because we, my dh and I don't talk about Santa, I mean Jesus is the reason for the Season. The only way that we explain the archtype of Santa is that he represents the three wise men and their gives to Jesus.

Technically... Jesus is the CHRISTIAN reason for the season. Yule is just as valid, as are any number of the feasts that traditionally happened at that time of year.


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## puddingpop (Feb 1, 2004)

We're in the "no" camp. I remember feeling pretty horrible that my parents lied to me when I discovered the truth and am not comfortable lying to Adam about it either. Besides, he ends up with so many gifts that anything from Santa would be beyond overkill.


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## s_kristina (Aug 9, 2004)

Yes, we do Santa here and I hope dd will continue to believe and help make things magical for her siblings for a long time to come. Growing up my family of origin did not do Santa, the Easter bunny or the Tooth Fairy and I really wish they had. My dh on the other hand has very fond memories of Santa and when he was older helping his parents keep Santa real for his brother, dh is 10 years older then bil. If it weren't for Santa and everything else we tie in with him we would not do anything on Christmas. We have our spiritual holiday on the Solstice. My dh even surprised me last year and made that extra special.


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## Ruthla (Jun 2, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MaterBum* 
Other: DD1 (4) knows already from hearing other people talk last year about the idea of Santa. She knows it's a fun pretend game others like to play. She just told me a few days ago she wouldn't mind playing the Santa game this year.

So, what we are planning on doing. Each child gets three small gifts in our family (usually a book, a small toy, and a piece of clothing). We are going to make the combined gift for all three to share (some wooden train set pieces I've been collecting off of craigslist) from Santa.

BUT, we will not tell our kids it is anything other than a fun game to pretend and play and dream about.

That sounds like an EXCELLENT way to approach it, for those who don't have religious reasons to avoid Santa (either not celebraring Christmas at all, or keeping the focus on Jesus' birthday.) "Let's play the Santa game this year."


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## lillian (Dec 13, 2003)

no. we are jewish.


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## Momma Aimee (Jul 8, 2003)

Quote:

dh on the other hand has very fond memories of Santa and when he was older helping his parents keep Santa real for his brother, dh is 10 years older then bil.
this is a big thing too

in our family i am the oldest of the grandkids, by almost 20 years over the youngest -- so it becaomes a real rite of passage when you are part of keeping the Santa "story" alive for the yonger ones ... when you are the one sneaking outside to remove and stomp on the reindeer food for the yougner ones to find and so on ..... my oldest DN is only 8, he is starting to see logical holes in Santa .. but soon we will pull him into our camp and he can keep the magic alive for teh younger ones.

The memories are no less special to be the one playing santa to be the one "seeing santa" and in some ways i think they are better -- i can't wait to see the light in Theo's eyes this year as he really starts to get it. there is a real joy in giving him that joy and wonder --

Aimee


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## North_Of_60 (May 30, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Pynki* 
Yes there is a Santa at our house... However, he just puts candy canes on the christmas tree, and brings the stockings. No way am I letting a fat old elf get credit for our hard earned money. If it fits in the stocking, Santa brings it. Otherwise... nope.

That's what my mom did too. And she STILL is Santa, even though I'm now married with my own child, and clearly understand that a fat man dressed in red does not park his sleigh with reindeer on the roof and sneak down our gas fireplace.









We'll do Santa in the same light - as a state of mind, instead of the whole fat man coming down the chimney thing. Honestly, I think that part is silly, and don't ever remember being told, at least not by my parents, that that's actually what happened.


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## earthgirl (Feb 6, 2006)

Although DH & I are not completely in agreement on this, we will be doing Santa. It's just part of Xmas tradition. I do think we may tell DD it's for pretend, and we also think Santa may not bring big gifts, but more unusual things like playdough recipes or something. Oh, and there's no way in hell we're doing that "You have to be a good girl..." bit. We still have time to work out the details, fortunately.


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## Canadianmommax3 (Mar 6, 2006)

yes we do guess we are in the liars group!


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## beansricerevolt (Jun 29, 2005)

We don't do santa. We do celebrate the birth of Christ with a few gifts for the DCs tho.


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## onlyzombiecat (Aug 15, 2004)

Other- The Christmas Schnauzer comes to our house.

Dd came up with the idea a few years ago.
She also insisted on an Easter Beagle and a Dog Fairy (a Golden Retriever tooth fairy).
She loves dogs.







:


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## jenangelcat (Apr 17, 2004)

Deleted by user.


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## FoxintheSnow (May 11, 2004)

Nope not at all. Ds knows that polar bears and whales live in the north pole-not an old man with a beard and a crew of elves. I hate the lying aspect and I want ds to appreciate that mommy and daddy work hard to afford the gifts we give.

Just because you don't believe in Santa doesn't mean you can't have a magical or enchanting winter holiday.


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## Momma Aimee (Jul 8, 2003)

Quote:

Definitely yes. I never stopped doing Santa as an adult. I always put cookies out and make my husband put out the presents after I go to sleep.
ME TOO

we put of Theo's stuff after he is in bed -- then i go to bed so DH and mom can put out my stuff







-- i leave DH's stuff for mom to put out after DH joins me upstairs -- my poor folks are the only ones who don't get a surprise when they see the tree .... but mom seems to liek it that way -- and heck last year my dad did sneak some stuff in SOMETIME, maybe in teh moring before we all got up? he has always been the amazing on -- getting upa t 2 or 3 am to move things nad do things to add to the hosliday for mom after she and she goet things ready for me.

DH thinks i am silly -- but plays a long nicely


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## GooeyRN (Apr 24, 2006)

I'm not doing santa. I was let down when I learned that santa didn't really bring gifts, it was my parents. I felt lied to. I also didn't like how my parents would tell me I would get nothing but coal if I was "bad" before Christmas. I felt like it was held over my head, and then when the bomb dropped about santa not being real it was quite sad.


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## Gracesmom (Jun 26, 2005)

Yes, we absolutely do Santa. I don't believe that telling my kids a "lie" like this is harmful.

Could someone please explain to me the "credit" theory to me? For example, "I don't do Santa, because I don't want him getting the credit for presents that we buy." I genuinely don't understand that line of thinking.


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## moondiapers (Apr 14, 2002)

I voted other, we clebrate Yule and the Yule Faeries come to our house. I don't lie to my children, I imagine with them. If I couldn't imagine and believe along with them then I couldn't play along with their imagination games either. What a bummer that would be.


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## todavia (Aug 11, 2006)

no santa for us. i am jewish (though not religious) and i can't stand the consumer craze of the holiday season. also, when other family members spend their hard-earned money to buy the kids presents, i want them to know and appreciate who it came from and not think that some random white man just swooped out of the sky to magically deliver X at our doorstep. for us, santa is just another character in books, movies and our imaginations.


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## Rigama (Oct 18, 2005)

It's that time already, huh? In another 2 weeks there will be heated santa threads all over the place!

Yes, we do santa. Because it's fun, because it's one of the few postitive things I remember about my own childhood,and because I think that if ds grows up and feels hurt or betrayed by the "Santa Lie" and needs therapy for it, then he's done pretty darn well for himself. I worry more about the effect of day to day parenting and challenges than I do about a silly holiday tradition that he'll soon outgrow. I know there are lots of people out there who felt terribly hurt by their parent's deception, and I certainly am not invalidating those feelings, but honestly, every minute of every day is filled with infinite opportunities to screw my kid up. My hope is that when he's a dad he'll look at the things he didn't like about my parenting and choose differently.


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## nicole lisa (Oct 27, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *moondiapers* 
I voted other, we clebrate Yule and the Yule Faeries come to our house. I don't lie to my children, I imagine with them. If I couldn't imagine and believe along with them then I couldn't play along with their imagination games either. What a bummer that would be.

Right, but it's only imagining if both parties know the truth. I certainly imagine my days away with DS but neither of us is really trying to convince the other that it's real outside of the game. We're both in on it. With Santa it seems it's the adults pushing something that's not real as real and not letting the kids in on the game.

Some kids are sensitive to that. DS loves creating imaginary worlds with me but he's very sensitive to me making stuff up and trying to convince him it's real. He can detect that a mile away and gets very upset.


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## weeirishlass (Mar 30, 2006)

Daddy believes in Santa, mommy doesn't. We'll see what dd thinks, she's only 20 months.


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## Rigama (Oct 18, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Momma Aimee* 
ME TOO

we put of Theo's stuff after he is in bed -- then i go to bed so DH and mom can put out my stuff







-- i leave DH's stuff for mom to put out after DH joins me upstairs -- my poor folks are the only ones who don't get a surprise when they see the tree .... but mom seems to liek it that way -- and heck last year my dad did sneak some stuff in SOMETIME, maybe in teh moring before we all got up? he has always been the amazing on -- getting upa t 2 or 3 am to move things nad do things to add to the hosliday for mom after she and she goet things ready for me.

DH thinks i am silly -- but plays a long nicely


How lovely! I'm 32 and I still hope santa will bring me something. I think I'll have to do this for dh this year.


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## Momma Aimee (Jul 8, 2003)

Quote:

Yes, we do santa. Because it's fun, because it's one of the few postitive things I remember about my own childhood,and because I think that if ds grows up and feels hurt or betrayed by the "Santa Lie" and needs therapy for it, then he's done pretty darn well for himself. I worry more about the effect of day to day parenting and challenges than I do in a silly holiday tradition that he'll soon outgrow. I know there are lots of people out there who felt terribly hurt by their parent's deception, and I certainly am not invalidating those feelings, but honestly, every minute of every day is filled with infinite opportunities to screw my kid up. My hope is that when he's a dad he'll look at the things he didn't like about my parenting and choose differently.








good point -- if my biggest screw up as a mom is that i lied about a popular fictional charcter -- i will count myself lucky.

I never felt lied to -- it isn't a lie as much as it is a game -- for a while i was on one side of the game , then i was on the other -- but the game is fun for all to play.

lies are big things intentionally meant to mislead or harm .... Santa doesn't hurt anyone.

Perosnally i think the concept of "hard earned money spent on gifts for you" is toooo mcuh for a child. yes, children should respect money, but they should NEVER EVER be in a position to worry about it -- as they grow up they will know that the gifts are really bought my mom or Grandpa and they will rspect the vaule of them .... it is a natural part of growing and understanding. however i would never want my son to worry about the money his aunts spend on his gifts







: I much more want him to knwo they were THINKING about him and got him a gift, than to know they worked hard for the moeny to buy the gift.

Aimee


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## ~ATenthMuse~ (Mar 16, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Pynki* 
Yes there is a Santa at our house... However, he just puts candy canes on the christmas tree, and brings the stockings. No way am I letting a fat old elf get credit for our hard earned money. If it fits in the stocking, Santa brings it. Otherwise... nope.

ITA.







Here he generally fills stockings and brings one gift for each.


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## Momma Aimee (Jul 8, 2003)

Quote:

How lovely! I'm 32 and I still hope santa will bring me something. I think I'll have to do this for dh this year.
I would LOVE to get a box from Santa .... DH gets one each year







I keep waiting.....

I had a boy freind once, and the best thing he did was leave a gift on my car from santa when i had to work Christmas eve over night ....

Quote:

With Santa it seems it's the adults pushing something that's not real as real and not letting the kids in on the game.
??????????? Santa is not some horrid mostster that will come get them if they are bad.......... he is not a boogy man to make them scared to stay out past dark.......

i don't get that at all


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## todavia (Aug 11, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Momma Aimee* 
Perosnally i think the concept of "hard earned money spent on gifts for you" is toooo mcuh for a child. yes, children should respect money, but they should NEVER EVER be in a position to worry about it -- as they grow up they will know that the gifts are really bought my mom or Grandpa and they will rspect the vaule of them .... it is a natural part of growing and understanding. however i would never want my son to worry about the money his aunts spend on his gifts







: I much more want him to knwo they were THINKING about him and got him a gift, than to know they worked hard for the moeny to buy the gift.

Aimee

the $ part is MY feeling, not a part of any gift giving exchange. and i don't think that kids knowing that people work to earn money and that things cost money necessarily causes them to "worry" about it.


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## bellymama (Apr 15, 2007)

yes. it's part of my memory of christmas, and i loved it. i would have been sad if my mom and dad had told me there was no santa. instead, they let me believe what i wanted. they never forced me to believe, they just told me the story and i created the rest for myself. as i got older, i understood that santa was more symbolic and a legend, and that didn't make it any less special.
i plan on showing my kids other traditions too around that time of year as well...but santa was fun for me!

my dad was born on the acorean island of flores and they tell their kids that the baby jesus will come and leave you presents, or coal if you are bad. that always freaked me out more than anything...a little baby crawling around at night with coal...yikes!


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## jimblejamble (May 18, 2007)

No.

1. As a devout Christian, I'm celebrating it for Jesus' birth, not Santa, not elves, not mass amounts of toys.
2. I'm not going to lie to my children.
3. In the words of my dad, "I worked so hard to earn the money to buy presents for everyone, and I'm going to give credit to some mythical fat guy who breaks into peoples' homes in the middle of the night?!"









...BUT if their friends happen to take part in the Santa thing, I'm not going to shield them from it.


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## eckmannl (Nov 9, 2004)

I voted other.
Last year, my kids were 2 and 3. My dd (who was 2) didn't have a clue, but my mom introduced the concept of santa to my ds (who was 3) and he was getting into it, but he asked me about it and I told him the truth. Santa is pretend, but it's fun to pretend. I gave him the option of pretending or not. He chose to pretend. When it comes up again this year, I'll do the same thing.


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## holly6737 (Dec 21, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *skyastara* 
My parents never did that either.

I voted no.

I clearly remember being very skeptical of the whole thing from a very early age. My parents kept trying to 'keep the magic alive' or whatever, and I eventually (at age 4) had to basically trick them into giving it away. I did not enjoy being lied to, I felt betrayed and tricked and etc.

I don't lie to my kids. I think there is plenty of magic around that is not fictional. A butterfly from a brown dried up thing that used to be a caterpillar? Now that is magical.

I couldn't have said it better myself, especially the part about the butterfly!


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## Leilamus (Jun 12, 2006)

nope! we celebrate Christmas but as time of giving and sharing. DS only hears about Santa from his grandparents, but it's not bad, they just ask the standard "Are you excited for Santa coming?" stuff. Last year DS#1 didn't seem to even care or notice the idea of Santa, I'm hoping it stays the same this year.

We don't mention Santa mainly because we are Wiccan and celebrate Yule. I was not raised with a religion and DP hasn't been to church in a decade so it doesn't make sense to us to celebrate the holiday as the birth of Christ or the big ole man in the red suit either! (not equating the two, just mentioning the two most popular reasons for celebrating it) I also had a pretty traumatic experience when I realized there wasn't a Santa and although I know won't recreate that for my kids for a number of reasons I still didn't want to have to explain why there wasn't a Santa at some point.


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## holly6737 (Dec 21, 2006)

...nevermind. I'm not with it today. I was confused because DH's family is Jewish, but not religious, and they always did Santa, but they did Hannakuh too. Confusing, sorry. So yeah nevermind.


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## caeden&connersmom (Apr 18, 2006)

Santa up until last year when we started celebrating Yule, cause I don't believe in god or the whole theory about Christmas from a religious standpoint. Just one more converted holiday taken over to control the heathens. It makes me want to grind my teeth when I see all the "Jesus is the reason for the season" Grrrr.







Something that rubs me the wrong way I guess, cause alot of people KNOW he wasnt born on Christmas, yet perpetuate the lie and celebrate it!


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## mom0810 (May 19, 2006)

YES!!!!! I can't imagine Christmas without Santa Claus and of COURSE we will have Santa come every year. There is already lots of talk about his arrival and it's only September!


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## MissMommyNiceNice (May 1, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *alegna* 
Yes. I think magic is wonderful









-Angela









:

I want ds to grow up beleiving in fairies and elfs and trolls and gnomes. I will do all I can to maintain that wonderful illusion and extend his magical childhood.


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## MissMommyNiceNice (May 1, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *caeden&connersmom* 
Santa up until last year when we started celebrating Yule, cause I don't believe in god or the whole theory about Christmas from a religious standpoint. Just one more converted holiday taken over to control the heathens. It makes me want to grind my teeth when I see all the "Jesus is the reason for the season" Grrrr.







Something that rubs me the wrong way I guess, cause alot of people KNOW he wasnt born on Christmas, yet perpetuate the lie and celebrate it!

Actually, I associate santa more with my pagen beleifs than jesus. Why not try having him come on Kris Kringel Tag, which is December 6? That's how the germans do it! Christmas is about jesus, kris kringel tag is about gifts & elves & majik.


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## caeden&connersmom (Apr 18, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *hklinefelter22* 
Actually, I associate santa more with my pagen beleifs than jesus. Why not try having him come on Kris Kringel Tag, which is December 6? That's how the germans do it! Christmas is about jesus, kris kringel tag is about gifts & elves & majik.

Oh absoultely! Plus we have *our* celebration on Yule and then *regular* Christmas on Dec 25th (When my mom comes over with gobs of stuff for the boys)







: She still gives me gifts from Santa! I guess I feel as long as our kids know what we do and why, they can have one day of fun and placate my mother!







They know Santa is not real! (Moreso becasue they would freak out at the thought of some fat guy in a red suit creeping around our house at night!)

Last year we went out and found our yule log and its packed away for his year, and I told the boys why we had it and tried to give them more information on why we were doing it, I made wreaths from branches from our evergreens, decorated with things we found outside. (My oldest is 6 and loves that we celebrate nature)


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## LavenderMae (Sep 20, 2002)

I voted other.







We do Santa Claus but the kids know it's really us. They still get a big kick out of it! We talked about the whole santa thing when our dd was small and this is what we came up with, it's all the fun with none of the lying














(I'm seriously not saying that in a judgmental way, my tone is very light hearted).

When I found out (I was pretty young) Santa wasn't real it really was just another let down, another way the adults in my life betrayed me but my childhood sucked. My dh also felt upset hewas lied to but again his family life wasn't the best and I think there was already a lack of trust there. Of course our experiences are one of the reasons we decided to do the santa thing like we do. Yikes didn't mean to get so heavy.








That said I do think in healthy families Santa can be a lot of fun and it won't be tramatic when the kids find out he's not real.


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## littleaugustbaby (Jun 27, 2003)

Yes, we do Santa, because it's fun.









We don't use Santa as a threat or a bargaining tool, though, and I tell DD that some people don't believe in Santa, and that he does not go to all kids' houses, and that it does not have anything to do with being "good" or "bad".


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## oldermamato5 (Feb 4, 2005)

no santa here,but lots of fun.


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## RoadBuddy (May 19, 2005)

No, I don't think so. DS is 4 months old, so I can't say for sure.

We want to take the materialism and consumerism out of Christmas, and IME, the Santa thing perpetuates this. We do gifts but they are from family, not a guy in a red suit who seems to exist only to give 'good kids' more stuff







: .

We'll talk about St. Nick and giving and thankfulness, and respect for those who believe in Santa, of course. We're Christian and will focus on the religious reason for Christmas, but we're skipping Santa for cultural (materialism, etc) reasons, not religious ones.


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## zeldabee (Aug 23, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *USAmma* 
Yes, with hesitation. We were not going to, and my dd picked it up all on her own. My grandparents encourage it. For their sake (the kids and the grandparents who are very old and precious to us) we are going to do it. But we are not going overboard with it, either.

That's me, too. I wouldn't do it, myself. And if I were still in Brooklyn, living in the middle of a conservative Jewish community, it wouldn't be an issue. As a nominally Xtian, mostly lapsed Catholic person, I'd probably have celebrated Xmas in a _very_ low-key kind of way--possibly going to mass and whatnot--and wouldn't be inclined to "do" Santa.

However, I'm now in Oregon, near my father's family, and we celebrate Xmas together, and they're very into the Santa thing. Since I moved out here specifically so that my son could have them in his life, I'm just going with the flow vis Xmas. They all have fun with it, the grandparents and kids.

I am working on them, though, to please tone it down a bit. For Sprogly's recent birthday, I asked for low-key, no plastic, no batteries, and no cheap made-in-China stuff, with the emphasis on LOW-KEY. For once, they listened--what a relief, not to have to get rid of anything afterwards! So for this Xmas I plan to lobby hard for simplicity. That'll be an uphill battle, because Sprogly's cousins are a little older, and they have certain expectations. One of his cousins gets so many gifts from her other grandparents that their garage is full of unopened toys, sometimes even more than one of a particular toy, because they forgot that they already gave her one. It's obscene.

Anyway. Santa Claus. I'd like it to be a no, but it's not. I'm just doing my best to keep it simple, and I am not talking about Santa a lot, and if I do, I'm speaking of a fun, pretend character.


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## delphiniumpansy (Mar 1, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *alegna* 
Yes. I think magic is wonderful









-Angela

I agree. And the "lie" about it did not harm me at all. I was a bit put off by finding out he was not real at first but then realized it had been really fun and I missed it. I got more presents when I still believed in him and the holiday season was more magical then. So, we do it and have a blast.


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## bobica (May 31, 2004)

we do santa but an extremely downsized version than either of us grew up with. dd asks santa for 1 special present. we don't make a big deal about it. this year, we'll talk more about the spirit of Christmas (she's 4)- we'll get more into that & less into santa as she gets older. both my family & dh's family are extremely into Christmas, so they're a big part of the reason we do santa.


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## Stinkerbell (Aug 11, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *alegna* 
Yes. I think magic is wonderful









-Angela

Word!

This is a hot button issue for me. It's none of my business what you tell your kids about Xmas but it bothers me on a very deep level that parents would be so concerned with "focusing" on the religion of the holiday that they would deprive their kids of a sweet, innocent and magical part of life. The christmas season can be about many things and for many people (even some christians) it is a focus on FAMILY and TRADITION which include Santa and the reindeer and whatnot.

It's such a huge part of my life and our winter season....I cannot imagine NOT giving my kids that gift.


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## Stinkerbell (Aug 11, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Pynki* 
Technically... Jesus is the CHRISTIAN reason for the season. Yule is just as valid, as are any number of the feasts that traditionally happened at that time of year.

Thank you. I sort of grit my teeth whenever I read/hear that phrase. It might be the reason for YOUR season but just as you think Santa is not "real"....well...you know what I'm getting at.

Sorry. Totally OT and I apologize. I just had to make note of this.


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## orangebird (Jun 30, 2002)

We are a Jewish atheist house and we do santa









It is a totally American secular thing and the kids think it's fun. We don't go crazy with it though, we don't really "celebrate" those kind of holidays, but we do the stockings and cookies and milk thing. Oh, and of course carrots for the reindeer.


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## ColoradoMama (Nov 22, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Stinkerbell* 
This is a hot button issue for me. It's none of my business what you tell your kids about Xmas but it bothers me on a very deep level that parents would be so concerned with "focusing" on the religion of the holiday that they would deprive their kids of a sweet, innocent and magical part of life. The christmas season can be about many things and for many people (even some christians) it is a focus on FAMILY and TRADITION which include Santa and the reindeer and whatnot.

*ahem* not all of us choose to forego telling our children that santa is real because of religious convictions. I can see that this is a "hot button" for you, but good grief - that came across REALLY judgmental. So what if some people focus on the religious part? For some people it is a very religious holiday. FWIW - I remember Christmas as a very magical time of year - putting up the tree, the snow over the Christmas lights, making fudge with my mom, coming home from school to smell the most wonderful holiday smells, putting cloves in oranges and hanging them all over the house, the candles, the carols. Actually, the only part I remember as annoying and lacking in magic was the santa part. I loved the santa part so much more once I could stop pretending that I thought it was real. The family time, the beautiful decorations, the songs, etc. - these are all magical parts of Christmas. Nobody has to "do" santa to have a magical Christmas.

p.s. Those of us who don't "do" santa get just as sick of hearing about how it's _taking away the magic_.


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## corwinegall (Jul 7, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *alegna* 
Yes. I think magic is wonderful









-Angela

you said it perfect!

I try and word it carefully and when questions come up I don't lie about it. Ds asked a lot of questions one year, I didn't want to tell him he was real, but I didn't want to outright tell him he wasn't real, I wanted him to figure it out for himself. It did take a bit into the conversation for him to get my cryptic answers. I don't think he resents it at all, he's excited to work santa into Christmas for dd.

IMO Christmas on the 25th is a cultural holiday, to spread joy and sharing. I take Easter more seriously when it comes to my religion, but for me it's metaphorical, so I'm not offended by the easter bunny or anything.


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## corwinegall (Jul 7, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ColoradoMama* 
*snip* I remember Christmas as a very magical time of year - putting up the tree, the snow over the Christmas lights, making fudge with my mom, coming home from school to smell the most wonderful holiday smells, putting cloves in oranges and hanging them all over the house, the candles, the carols. Actually, the only part I remember as annoying and lacking in magic was the santa part. I loved the santa part so much more once I could stop pretending that I thought it was real. The family time, the beautiful decorations, the songs, etc. - these are all magical parts of Christmas. Nobody has to "do" santa to have a magical Christmas.
*snip*

good point.


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## Momma Aimee (Jul 8, 2003)

Quote:

It's such a huge part of my life and our winter season....I cannot imagine NOT giving my kids that gift.
excetly -- is there were NO reinreer to make food for -- there would be no left over reindeer food to eat, and there would be no easy cooking for the little kids to help with, and there would be no family time int eh kitchen listening to music and telling stories.

if there were no reindeer to put food outside for there would be no bundleing up in coats oever Pjs and all teh kids, evewn the big ones getting carried outside to look at the lights and talk about where to put the food. there would be no rushing outside in morning, draging a "resisting" grandpa to see if the food got ate.

If there was no santa to leave cookie for there would be no cuddling aroudn the fireplace to read story before bed in our new PJs and no looking at the santa plate int eh china cabnet all year waiting to get it out. ther ewould be no thank you note the next moring to run to.

and so on

JMO -- but all the fun of santa and the reindeer make it a lot more about taking care of others, and about the excitement of the traditons and LESS about what is piled up under the tree -- all the kids in our family have run to check on the reindeer food, or the cookies, long before looking to see how much stuff was piled under the tree. the days befroe, espocially all Eve is spent getting ready for company -- santa and the deer incudled -- not wondering what gifts you will get. Leaving cookies, or the PB and J sandwich my DN wanted to leave out "cuz even Santa must get tired of cookies all the time" or remembering the reindeer too -- it is all about thinking about others, not yourself.

JMO


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## Momma Aimee (Jul 8, 2003)

Quote:

We are a Jewish atheist house and we do santa

It is a totally American secular thing and the kids think it's fun. We don't go crazy with it though, we don't really "celebrate" those kind of holidays, but we do the stockings and cookies and milk thing. Oh, and of course carrots for the reindeer.










"its Christmas and we're Jewish and we've got a tree and lights. Our Parents are embarassed and it causes many fights......"

I love that song, soryy -- it just made me think of it.


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## abac (Mar 10, 2005)

I voted no. We don't have ds receiving presents from Santa. I don't mind pretending with him about Santa, but I won't tell ds that it's a real man, any more than I will tell him that Curious George is a real monkey. It's not real. He has just as much fun pretending about it. When we go to my parents' house on Christmas Eve and my nephews are there, someone usually says that they saw an elf running across the lawn. All of the kids, including ds, think it's great. They all run to the window to look for the elf. The only difference is that my ds knows that it's pretend. Maybe the other kids do too. I don't know.

I have no issue with people who choose to do Santa. To each their own.


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## Sarahbunny (Jun 13, 2006)

Yes...and I don't think of it as a big deal at all. It's just a childhood thing.


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## LavenderMae (Sep 20, 2002)

What's reindeer food?


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## mija y mijo (Dec 6, 2006)

Of course! I'm a big fat liar just rolling in consumerism!


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## Kathryn (Oct 19, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Stinkerbell* 
Word!

This is a hot button issue for me. It's none of my business what you tell your kids about Xmas but it bothers me on a very deep level that parents would be so concerned with "focusing" on the religion of the holiday that they would *deprive their kids* of a *sweet, innocent and magical* part of life. The christmas season can be about many things and for many people (even some christians) it is a focus on FAMILY and TRADITION which include Santa and the reindeer and whatnot.

It's such a huge part of my life and our winter season....I cannot imagine NOT giving my kids that gift.

I'm glad you enjoy your tradition, but to say that others are depriving their children because they don't do things how you do? That's just outright wrong and rude. Nor do I believe it's sweet, innocent, or magical. I knew I was being lied to as a child and I hated it.

We don't do santa. We give each other gifts and have fun doing that. There's no reason for us to bring in a mythical characture to bring gifts as well. We give gifts to each other on Christmas because we love each other and we want to do it for each other. We have fun that way just fine. We celebrate the season, the beauty, and the close family.


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## Peony (Nov 27, 2003)

Absolutely not. We celebrate some holidays, we give each other gifts on X-Mas, but to lie to my children and tell them that some large dude is going to come into our house in the middle of the night and leave gifts for them? I'm just not interested. Both Dh and I were were very upset when we found out SC wasn't real as children, over and beyond the being sad about it. The holidays are magical enough at our house without him.


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## Momma Aimee (Jul 8, 2003)

Quote:

What's reindeer food?
in our house, family, it is magic reindeer food









it is actually -- i guess -- a candy ? it is red hots, and popcorn and stuff mixed up and drizzed with white cholate to make ti stick together (like puppy chow or popcorn balls) -- you pour it out of trays, pour the white choloate over it and let it harder, then break it apart.

i can get the actual recipe if you want









My Aunt does it with all the kids, and she tells a story of what each of the foods is importnat for and so on .. really cute. Grandpa did it with me when i was little.

then you leave some outside for the deer, but the recipe always makes enough for the humans to eat a lot of too (i looove it).


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## LavenderMae (Sep 20, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Momma Aimee* 
in our house, family, it is magic reindeer food









it is actually -- i guess -- a candy ? it is red hots, and popcorn and stuff mixed up and drizzed with white cholate to make ti stick together (like puppy chow or popcorn balls) -- you pour it out of trays, pour the white choloate over it and let it harder, then break it apart.

i can get the actual recipe if you want









YUM, I would love the recipe. Thank you!


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## Kathryn (Oct 19, 2004)

Is that actually safe for real deer/other animals to eat or do you put it in a spot where they cannot get to it?


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## jenangelcat (Apr 17, 2004)

Deleted by user.


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## NiteNicole (May 19, 2003)

I LOVED the whole Santa thing before and after I believed. It was so much fun and even before I had kids, it was fun participating with the younger cousins and then when we were all too old and there were no little ones, it was still fun. You know, drunk 20-somethings cattering hay on the lawn and hiding presents.

I never felt tricked. My parents never tried to fool me into believing after I figured it out, they just gave me a Santa job like helping the younger kids put out cookies and hay and later filling stockings or whatever. FUN. I can't wait for my dd to be old enough to really get it, esp when there will be more kids and cousins to share it with.


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## alaskaberry (Dec 29, 2006)

I'm not going to tell my kid that Santa, Easter Bunny, etc are *real*, but I won't tell him they're imaginary either. Let him decide for himself.


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## Momma Aimee (Jul 8, 2003)

Quote:

YUM, I would love the recipe. Thank you!
i just e-mailed my AUnt to ask for the recipe -- she is still keeper of all the candy recipes and offical "adult" int eh Cadny kitchen -- it was her and Grandpa before me, and since Grandpa is gone, she has carried on -- soon my kids will join her.

Quote:

Is that actually safe for real deer/other animals to eat or do you put it in a spot where they cannot get to it?
As far as I know it is safe for all animals, dogs, i guess not, but there is so little choloate i we don't worry. it is mainly like popcorn, i think last year it has pretze bits too. you can change it. We have removed the nuts i seem to remember from when i was little.....

we do live on 33 acres in the middle of no where and see deer in the yard all the time.... but we put it right out in the front yard, near the house, so the kids can "watch fromt he windows" to see the reindeer eat it.







so i kinda doubt any animlas would come that close and get into it -- but i think it would be ok. but Santa and the deer park pretty close to the house, you know?









after the kids are asleep -- we go out and pick up most of it, and step on some of it so it looks trampled and eaten. So again, i doubt any wild animal would get into it.......

Quote:

I never felt tricked. My parents never tried to fool me into believing after I figured it out, they just gave me a Santa job like helping the younger kids put out cookies and hay and later filling stockings or whatever. FUN. I can't wait for my dd to be old enough to really get it, esp when there will be more kids and cousins to share it with.
This is how i feel. I was never lied to. When i'd ask I'd get a cryptic, but honest answer. As i grew i got more and more of the real history -- of St Nick, or the stories and so on .... and eventually i grew into helping set the stage for the little ones ....

I still believe ...

Santa doesn't have to be about gifts and getting stuff ... I really think the gifts under teh tree from him are the minor part ... the big part is the decorating, adn the thinking about what to leave him to eat, and the getting ready ..... it makes things fun all the getting ready for Santa... the getting ready for Christmas, but it isn't getting ready to get gifts.

oh and our family writes thank you notes to Santa just like to Grandma and Aunt and so on ....

Aimee


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## Brigianna (Mar 13, 2006)

*No, no, no, no, no, no, NO!!!!!*

I mean, no, we don't do santa, but *NO NO NO* it is not time to talk about this yet!!!!!! It's September!! Give us a couple more months before talking about christmas stuff!

Okay, I'm just going to have to start hiding now







: to keep the Christmas from getting me. If the season gets any longer, I'll be spending half the year hiding from Christmas.

If I see a santa decoration in a store, I'm going to throw a tantrum that would make my 2 yr old blush.


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## Momma Aimee (Jul 8, 2003)

i have my fall decorations out

I am plotting my halloween decorations -- so excited DS will actually notice this year

but I am due the first week of Nov, sooooooooooooooooooooooo I have been working on Christmas since July























I want it done -- shopped and shipped, or wrapped and hidden -- BEFORE the baby.


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## goodheartedmama (Feb 1, 2007)

wow...I got like 6 pages!







I'm very impressed

Thanks for the great replies...it's interesting to see different views on the subject.


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## LavenderMae (Sep 20, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Momma Aimee* 
i just e-mailed my AUnt to ask for the recipe -- she is still keeper of all the candy recipes and offical "adult" int eh Cadny kitchen -- it was her and Grandpa before me, and since Grandpa is gone, she has carried on -- soon my kids will join her.

Thank you! I think my sister and I are going to make candy ect this year and reindeer food sounds soooo good. What a lovely tradtion your family has (Oh and a yummy one too)!


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## emdeecee_sierra (Oct 16, 2005)

Yes.
Because magic is good.


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## milagras (Aug 30, 2004)

I love holiday traditions like decorating and baking cookies and making candy. I love the songs and stories though I'm no longer Christian. We don't have kids yet, but we've decided we will not do Santa. I want to teach my children about the generosity and caring spirit of our fellow beings in a more real sense. Like what can we do for one another to brighten our lives etc. Not that I don't love the magic of wishes and dreams. It's a tough issue. My family thinks we're crazy and they do Santa, so it will be tricky if any nieces/nephews are still young enough by the time I have kids (hopefully sooner than later!).

Santa is one of those issues that stick with me. Learning the truth about Santa was one of the first big letdowns in my life. I could not believe my parents would lie to me like that year after year. They enjoyed the game so much that I didn't tell them the jig was up for a few years. There has to be a way to capture the magic of living without lying. And I know that may be harsh so I say to each their own about this kind of thing.


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## philomom (Sep 12, 2004)

First of all, we are not xtian. Second of all, it's lying.

I have every bad memories of the discovery of being lied to as a kid. It still leaves me feeling bitter.


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## UnschoolnMa (Jun 14, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *emdeecee_sierra* 
Yes.
Because magic is good.

As a Pagan I agree wholeheartedly that magic is good stuff! I just think that lying is not good. And telling my kid a guy actually delivers gifts to our house when he does not is a lie.

I have no problem with others doing Santa however they wish...but the "we do because we believe in magic" or "it's magical!" comment always comes up for the pro santa folks. You can have magic without him too.







Just saying...


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## BookGoddess (Nov 6, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *orangebird* 
We are a Jewish atheist house and we do santa









It is a totally American secular thing and the kids think it's fun.

I agree. We're not Christian either but we celebrate Christmas in a secular way. Santa is a part of that. Santa was a big part of the magic of my childhood and I won't deny that wonderful experience to my DD. I also will do the Tooth fairy, fairies in general, trolls, gnomes, unicorns...I don't see anything "wrong" with it.


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## oceanbaby (Nov 19, 2001)

I wonder why some kids felt so betrayed when they found out there was no Santa, and others weren't bothered at all. I was one who wasn't bothered at all. My parents were very honest with us, very respectful, and at a certain age when I asked my dad if Santa was real he told me the truth. I think I was probably 7 or so. But I went along with it for my younger sister, and when she found out (the same way) it didn't bother her either.

My parents never used it in a manipulative way - we never had to "be good" or any of that crap. The didn't play it up, but they definitely did it.

It was such a strange evolution for us. I had never really thought about not doing Santa. Then the Christmas when ds1 was 2.5yo, I started to say the words, and I literally couldn't make them come out. Telling my son that a guy was flying through the air, coming down our chimney and leaving gifts was just too outrageous for me. So I let it drop and ds1 was ignorant about the whole thing.

Next year he was in preschool. I hadn't yet decided what to do, when one day he came home telling me about Santa. He stated definitively that Santa was real, and my only options were to go along with it or burst his bubble. And I went along with it.

So here we are 2 years later, doing Santa. I don't play it up, we most certainly do not do the whole good/bad thing. I think it's just fine to do Christmas without Santa, but I have such beautiful memories of peeking around the corner and seeing the presents, and remembering the thrill of the magic.

But I still think it's a lie, and hopefully it's the only one I'll ever tell my kids.


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## Stinkerbell (Aug 11, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ColoradoMama* 
*ahem* not all of us choose to forego telling our children that santa is real because of religious convictions. I can see that this is a "hot button" for you, but good grief - that came across REALLY judgmental. So what if some people focus on the religious part? For some people it is a very religious holiday. FWIW - I remember Christmas as a very magical time of year - putting up the tree, the snow over the Christmas lights, making fudge with my mom, coming home from school to smell the most wonderful holiday smells, putting cloves in oranges and hanging them all over the house, the candles, the carols. Actually, the only part I remember as annoying and lacking in magic was the santa part. I loved the santa part so much more once I could stop pretending that I thought it was real. The family time, the beautiful decorations, the songs, etc. - these are all magical parts of Christmas. Nobody has to "do" santa to have a magical Christmas.

p.s. Those of us who don't "do" santa get just as sick of hearing about how it's _taking away the magic_.

I'm sorry it sounds judgmental....I really am. But I also meant what I said. I didn't say focusing on religion is wrong, I said it bothered me that people used that as a reason to not "do santa". And it DOES bother me!! I also said I dont care whatsoever what you do at your house with your family. You can believe in the great flying ghost of christmas past if you want. Doesnt effect me. But it DOES make me sad to think that kids are missing out on something that was so special to my life. It IS the magic part of christmas for me, so I am sad to think kids wont have that? KWIM? Not that its the "right" thing...just that I would love to share that happy, giddy feeling I get from the magic of santa and I cant. Introspective emotional sharing.

Thats all! Just to be clear. I am entitled to my opinion surely as you are entitled to yours and it is NOT judgement....you might be the one person here who could be my best friend (for all I know) and not doing santa wouldnt change that. Im answering the poll honestly









Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kathryn* 
I'm glad you enjoy your tradition, but to say that others are depriving their children because they don't do things how you do? That's just outright wrong and rude. Nor do I believe it's sweet, innocent, or magical. I knew I was being lied to as a child and I hated it.

We don't do santa. We give each other gifts and have fun doing that. There's no reason for us to bring in a mythical characture to bring gifts as well. We give gifts to each other on Christmas because we love each other and we want to do it for each other. We have fun that way just fine. We celebrate the season, the beauty, and the close family.

Again, sorry if it came off rude. I DO think its sweet, innocent and magical and I DO feel like kids are being deprived of that (isnt that the meaning of deprived? to have something withheld?). So what? I can think that and you can think Im totally wrong and life goes on and nothing is worse for it.

See above. Im only answering the thread honestly. I have no intention of self righteousness...just sharing my feelings.


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## ColoradoMama (Nov 22, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Stinkerbell* 
Thats all! Just to be clear. I am entitled to my opinion surely as you are entitled to yours and it is NOT judgement....you might be the one person here who could be my best friend (for all I know) and not doing santa wouldnt change that. Im answering the poll honestly









Never said you WERE being judgmental. I said your posted came across very judgmental. It is hard to convey tone in writing! You are absolutely entitled to your opinion. I'd never try to take that away from you. BTW - no need to feel sorry for my children. They're incredibly happy kids who love to experience that magic that is in the world. They're not missing out on anything.


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## ColoradoMama (Nov 22, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *oceanbaby* 
I wonder why some kids felt so betrayed when they found out there was no Santa, and others weren't bothered at all. I was one who wasn't bothered at all. My parents were very honest with us, very respectful, and at a certain age when I asked my dad if Santa was real he told me the truth. I think I was probably 7 or so. But I went along with it for my younger sister, and when she found out (the same way) it didn't bother her either.

Just to be clear - I never felt betrayed. I knew they were trying to do something nice for me. I just thought it was kind of dumb, and I felt like an idiot pretending!


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## Romana (Mar 3, 2006)

Yes, but I have heard too many stories about kids being horribly scarred by the Santa myth to make it a "real" pretend thing. Instead we'll handle it in the same way we handle other myths, legends, and religions - as something interesting, fun, and historical, but with more active participation than some other myths (for example, we won't be re-enacting any Greek myths every year). We'll instruct our kids to be sensitive to other children and not tell them Santa isn't real, since some kids do believe it.

I would have thought the Santa trauma wasn't real if my dh hadn't told me he cried when he found out, and did feel betrayed. I was really surprised. I figured it out because my mom's handwriting was the same as Santa's, and so I finally asked her one year. I wasn't embarrassed or hurt or traumatized, and I didn't feel like my parents had been lying to me or betrayed me. I still get presents from my mom from Santa.









But I don't want any of my kids to have the same issue dh had, so we won't do Santa as real. Hopefully then we get all the fun without any of the trauma, and the kid can still make-believe and pretend and dream and imagine about Santa without having an issue down the road.


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## Stinkerbell (Aug 11, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ColoradoMama* 
Never said you WERE being judgmental. I said your posted came across very judgmental. It is hard to convey tone in writing! You are absolutely entitled to your opinion. I'd never try to take that away from you. BTW - no need to feel sorry for my children. They're incredibly happy kids who love to experience that magic that is in the world. They're not missing out on anything.

I dont know if I feel sorry for them...I think I feel sorry for myself for not being able to share it







: A good visual of me: skipping across the country in a boho dress sprinkling magic-happy-fairy dust on the world. I'm naturally giddy.


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## ColoradoMama (Nov 22, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Stinkerbell* 
I dont know if I feel sorry for them...I think I feel sorry for myself for not being able to share it







: A good visual of me: skipping across the country in a boho dress sprinkling magic-happy-fairy dust on the world. I'm naturally giddy.

That is quite a visual you portray! You're free to share it with my kiddos. We actually do a lot of santa stuff - pictures, etc., we just tell them up front that it is all for fun and not real - we're playing pretend. So, maybe I didn't answer the poll entirely correctly.


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## Potty Diva (Jun 18, 2003)

So without santa there is no magic?

Oh vomit.

We have so much magic in our Christmas it isn't even funny.

Even as atheists we had fun and magic in our christmas. It's called FAMILY. We decorate cookies, buy and wrap gifts to and from each other. We look forward to christmas eve dinner and christmas breakfast. Phone calls from friends and family, special packages in the mail. And hopefully- snow.

The magic isn't in Santa it's inside US.


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## beanandpumpkin (Jan 2, 2005)

Yes, but.....

When the kids ask questions, I always say "what do YOU think?" So far, they both think that Santa lives at the North Pole, and can't really see and hear them, but does somehow know what they want for Christmas. I'm kind of hoping that my older one figures it out this year or next, and that my younger one figures out soon thereafter. I don't like the whole concept, but I also don't want to spoil the fun.... oh yeah, and DH would be livid if I told them the truth about it. He feels more strongly pro-Santa than I do anti-Santa, so for now, we're doing the Santa thing.


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## mamabadger (Apr 21, 2006)

No, never have, for several reasons.

1) We don't want to lie to the kids. I was not traumatized by finding out about SC, but still felt uncomfortable lying. DH and I told the children, when they asked, that Santa was just pretend, but that if their friends' families wanted to do Santa Claus, it would be rude to tell them he wasn't real. We saw no reason to spoil things for pro-Santa families.

2) Because of religious issues. SC is derived from St. Nicholas, whom we have a great deal of reverence for, and including Santa in our celebration seemed disrespectful. Associating St. Nicholas with magic is also, in our view, bad.

4) Since we celebrate Christmas on January 7, the usual cultural associations of the Nativity of Christ with things like Santa Claus, elves, reindeer, etc. are even more removed from the actual holiday. On Dec. 25, we are fasting for Advent. It allows us to maintain Christmas as a religious holiday rather than a purely secular one, and makes Santa rather irrelevant to the occasion.


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## DaughterOfKali (Jul 15, 2007)

My child associated Santa with xmas only because dc saw santa in malls, etc. Dc heard from people that santa brings presents but I never really told dc that. I said "you'll get presents for Christmas/Solstice".

Months ago, when dc was 4 1/2, the question finally came out.
Dc asked "Is Santa real?". I said no. I said it's a person in a costume.
And that was that.

There's lots of magic in the season for us...It just takes different form.


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## miss_sonja (Jun 15, 2003)

Love Santa!! The spirit of sharing, goodness, giving to others...it's great! We go light on the commercialism, heavy on the 'do good to others' theme. Santa is part of the pantheon of Tooth Fairy, Easter Bunny, Car Fairy, Leprachauns, etc.


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## BookGoddess (Nov 6, 2005)

What's the Car Fairy? I haven't heard of it.


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## neetling (Jan 24, 2006)

other - We're Christians and focus on celebrating Christ. We tell them the story of Santa Claus, but don't tell them he's real.


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## SamuraiEarthMama (Dec 3, 2002)

We celebrate the Santa Spirit. When you give purely for the joy of giving, with no expectation of acknowledgement or reciprocation, then you are filled with the Santa Spirit!

Anyone can help the Santa Spirit... Mom and Dad, the guys dressed up on the corner ringing bells, grandparents, Christmas carolers, people who donate to food banks... everyone!

A few years back, my youngest asked if he could help Santa, too. On his own initiative, he got things to put in each person's stocking. He giggled when people opened them, but I don't think anyone besides me ever knew.

So Santa things are always wonderful surprises in our house, and everyone who wants to gets to share in creating the magic.


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## Momma Aimee (Jul 8, 2003)

here is the recipe for magic reindeer food -- note it is written to be printed up FOR THE CHILD --









Quote:

Magic Reindeer Food

Make this simple recipe a few days ahead so that it is ready for Christmas Eve. Remember that reindeer have very small appetites and many homes to visit, so you only need to put about a cup out on the front lawn for them to eat. Share the remainder of the recipe with your family and friends.

In a very large bowl and with very clean hands, stir together
2 big handfuls of mini-pretzels, 1 cup of cocktail peanuts, 2 cups of toasted
oat O-shaped cereal, 2 cups of crisp rice cereal squares, and 1 cup of red
cinnamon candies. Your Mom or Dad can help with the measuring.

In a glass bowl, place 1 package of white chocolate candy coating
(usually 8 squares). Can you count to eight all by yourself?
With Mom or Dad helping, heat the chocolate in the microwave
for 90 seconds. Stir until it is smooth.

Pour the melted chocolate over the other ingredients and stir just to cover. (Mixture will be lightly covered and not coated.) Spread the mixture onto waxed paper. Then sprinkle with red and green sugars.

When completing cool, break the mixture into pieces and store in
an airtight container until you are ready to feed the reindeer!

Note to Mom or Dad: You can use any combination of cereals and nuts for the dry mixture and leave out the candies all together if you wish. The white chocolate coating is also sometimes called almond bark in grocery or discount stores. You can also use white chocolate candy pieces.
have some fun --


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## Sharlla (Jul 14, 2005)

No, no easter bunny or tooth fairy either. Not only do we not celebrate those holidays but we don't lie to our kids.


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## QueenOfTheMeadow (Mar 25, 2005)

We do Santa. My dad used to read to us the Night Before Christmas every Christmas eve, and he reads it to the grandchildren if we're there, or calls and reads it to them. It just makes me feel all warm and nostoligic. (yup, I'm getting teary eyed just thinking of it.







) For me, at least, it is a family tradition that I loved so much growing up, that I wanted to share it with my kids. Though, I have to admit, I'm not very good at it. I often have to correct myself about who gave the kids what. So I usually do the, "What do you think?" when they question me, and we talk about how Santa shows us the spirit of giving.


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

The Magic Reindeer Food (recipe listed above) should be perfectly safe for animals (unless the red hots really cause a problem, I but I would not think so). The 'chocolate' that is used is 'white chocolate' (which is NOT chocolate at all, and therefore not dangerous for dogs).

The question had asked, and I thought I would answer.

It is a cute idea, but since we don't do Santa, we don't do reindeer.

I find it a little sad that so many think my children are losing out on something 'so special'. And that we are doing something so bad by focusing on 'religion' rather than Santa and magic.

We have such wonderful times of Christmas. Such 'magical' memories. And yes, we know that it is not the actual day of Jesus's birth, but it is just a day that we have chosen to celebrate His birth. And I, in turn, find it sad that so many children are deprived of celebrating Christmas with all the spiritual significance that we do. The wonderful times, the wondrous memories, the family, the fun. It is all part of our celebration. We don't need Santa to have the Magic.


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## Storm Bride (Mar 2, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kidzaplenty* 
I find it a little sad that so many think my children are losing out on something 'so special'.


Quote:

And I, in turn, find it sad that so many children are deprived of celebrating Christmas with all the spiritual significance that we do. The wonderful times, the wondrous memories, the family, the fun. It is all part of our celebration. We don't need Santa to have the Magic.
I find these two parts of your quote to be a little...inconsistent.

I don't feel sorry for your kids because you don't do Santa. I think that would be incredibly arrogant. I do Santa with my kids because Santa carries special memories for me. (DS1 figured it out a long time ago, and wasn't mad at all...and he now enjoys playing along with the little ones.) We don't _need_ Santa to have the magic, either - but he's part of my "wonderful times, wondrous memories, the family and the fun".

OTOH, I think it's equally arrogant to feel sorry for my kids because they're "deprived" of the spiritual significance that Christmas holds for you. We're not a Christian family. Christmas, for me and mine, is a cultural and family holiday, which holds all kinds of memories and special significance for _us_. Please don't waste your energy feeling sad for my "deprived" kids, and I'll do you the same courtesy.

If you're going to feel sad that other kids are deprived of your celebration, don't be upset that others feel the same way about your kids. We all come from different backgrounds, have different traditions and carry different memories, and none of us have a lock on the "right" way to celebrate Christmas.


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## Storm Bride (Mar 2, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Romana9+2* 
I still get presents from my mom from Santa.









There are occasional "Santa" gifts under the tree at my mom's place, too. She's got three kids, three kids-in-law, 2 step-kids. The youngest of all of us is 30 and she still does this sometimes.


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

So perhaps my wording was not understood in the manner it was meant.

I am constantly bombarded on so many fronts by people feeling sorry for my children because we don't 'do' Santa. And when they begin pushing the idea that my children are so 'deprived' of tradition and magic of the season, I can not help but to think of how sad it is for their children to be 'deprived' of what my family has found.

I do not feel sorry for 'all the children' that are so deprived. If people wound not push their 'sorrow' on me, I would never even think about their children that way. Christmas is a personal time of year for my family. A time of family and a time of fun. But we are generally the 'odd ones out' because we don't 'do' Santa and I get the sympathy for my children EVERY year by nearly EVERYONE we know IRL, even family! UUGGGHHH! It is just frustrating!


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## LavenderMae (Sep 20, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Momma Aimee* 
here is the recipe for magic reindeer food -- note it is written to be printed up FOR THE CHILD --









have some fun --

I am defintely making that, my dd loves white choc. I bet it would taste good with chocolate instead of white choc. too. It might end up looking more like reindeer poo than food though.


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## QueenOfTheMeadow (Mar 25, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Storm Bride* 
I find these two parts of your quote to be a little...inconsistent.

I don't feel sorry for your kids because you don't do Santa. I think that would be incredibly arrogant. I do Santa with my kids because Santa carries special memories for me. (DS1 figured it out a long time ago, and wasn't mad at all...and he now enjoys playing along with the little ones.) We don't _need_ Santa to have the magic, either - but he's part of my "wonderful times, wondrous memories, the family and the fun".

OTOH, I think it's equally arrogant to feel sorry for my kids because they're "deprived" of the spiritual significance that Christmas holds for you. We're not a Christian family. Christmas, for me and mine, is a cultural and family holiday, which holds all kinds of memories and special significance for _us_. Please don't waste your energy feeling sad for my "deprived" kids, and I'll do you the same courtesy.

If you're going to feel sad that other kids are deprived of your celebration, don't be upset that others feel the same way about your kids. We all come from different backgrounds, have different traditions and carry different memories, and none of us have a lock on the "right" way to celebrate Christmas.

I have to admit I picked up on that inconsistency also. But I think that maybe she was feeling attacked and was feeling a bit defensive about it. We celebrate with Santa, but I certainly wouldn't feel that anyone's elses celebrations were any less special if they didn't. We are still adding and changing our family traditions, so who knows what my kids will carry on to their families, but I do hope that they will carry on the love of giving and being with family no matter how they celebrate it.


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## Storm Bride (Mar 2, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kidzaplenty* 
So perhaps my wording was not understood in the manner it was meant.

I am constantly bombarded on so many fronts by people feeling sorry for my children because we don't 'do' Santa. And when they begin pushing the idea that my children are so 'deprived' of tradition and magic of the season, I can not help but to think of how sad it is for their children to be 'deprived' of what my family has found.

I do not feel sorry for 'all the children' that are so deprived.

I think we'll just have to agree to disagree. The fact that you think those children are "so deprived" is telling...whether you state that you feel sorry for them or not. I enjoy the Santa tradition and our family has fun with it. Yours doesn't. That's fine. Feeling that other children are "deprived" because their family has different traditions is arrogant...on either side.

Quote:

If people wound not push their 'sorrow' on me, I would never even think about their children that way. Christmas is a personal time of year for my family. A time of family and a time of fun. But we are generally the 'odd ones out' because we don't 'do' Santa and I get the sympathy for my children EVERY year by nearly EVERYONE we know IRL, even family! UUGGGHHH! It is just frustrating!
Being the odd one out sucks, and I'm sorry you get crap about the Santa thing. I don't understand people like that.


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## Storm Bride (Mar 2, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *race_kelly* 
We are still adding and changing our family traditions, so who knows what my kids will carry on to their families, but I do hope that they will carry on the love of giving and being with family no matter how they celebrate it.









:
I completely agree with this.

Santa or no Santa, religious significance or no religious significance - Christmas is a very special time for my family, and I know we're very fortunate to have each other.


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## Ceinwen (Jul 1, 2004)

We kind of do Santa (voted 'other').

Santa brings one gift (unwrapped) for dd, and fills the stocking.

Other gifts are labelled as to who they're actually from.

We're a bit eclectic in our celebrations: I'm a non-practicing Catholic, current agnostic, dh is pretty much atheist, but we both enjoy pagan rituals.









So yeah, a bit of everything gets tossed in - mass with my mother, Christmas Eve secular bonanza at the inlaws, Solstice celebrations at our place...

Dp and I intend to answer any questions about Santa/Christmas spirt gently and honestly, along the lines of 'What do you think?' and go from there...

I was eleven or twelve when my parents finally had to break it to me that they were Santa, and boy was that a tough convo! I never once held it against them though, I just remember being in awe that they were so good at what they did!!


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## Storm Bride (Mar 2, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *nursemummy* 
We kind of do Santa (voted 'other').

Santa brings one gift (unwrapped) for dd, and fills the stocking.

Other gifts are labelled as to who they're actually from.

That's us, too, except that the gift from Santa is wrapped.


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## warriorprincess (Nov 19, 2001)

No, because
1) I do not want to ever tell my children something I don't believe to be true.
2)I think it takes away from the Christ child story.
3) I think it's deplorable when people use the Santa card as manipulation.


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## nina_yyc (Nov 5, 2006)

I voted no. We're Jewish.


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## Storm Bride (Mar 2, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *warriorprincess* 
3) I think it's deplorable when people use the Santa card as manipulation.

I'll just add that, as someone who has been doing Santa for 14 years, I completely agree with this. I _hate_ the "be good or Santa won't come" crap and all the rest of it. If you're going to jerk your kid's Christmas out from under them, then at least admit that you're the one doing it. One of the most heartbreaking things I ever saw was when a couple of ds1's friends from school came over, and ds1 was showing them the stuff from his Easter basket...and one of the girls said to the other one, "yeah - he got stuff, but the Bunny didn't come to our house, because you were bad"...







...and the other little girl apologized to her sister.


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## goodheartedmama (Feb 1, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Storm Bride* 







:
I completely agree with this.

Santa or no Santa, religious significance or no religious significance - Christmas is a very special time for my family, and I know we're very fortunate to have each other.

yes, definitely!


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## Ceinwen (Jul 1, 2004)

Quote:

I'll just add that, as someone who has been doing Santa for 14 years, I completely agree with this. I hate the "be good or Santa won't come" crap and all the rest of it.
Agreed!!


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## HipGal (Aug 16, 2006)

Yes and no. We are not actually talking about Santa ourselves, but we do read books that have Santa and Ds has seen some cartoons that have Santa. We may occasionally ask something like "Do you think Santa will come? What do you think Santa might bring you?" I don't want to lie, but I guess I'm trying to slip by on a technicality.









We are going to the IL's for the holidays, so we will have to see what they say. We may float like this for another year before explaining it as using our imaginations.


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## mama_daba (Dec 7, 2004)

we are not Christian and won't be doing santa and have not celebrated xmas in years. my partner is agnostic and i am panthiest. i voted other and not no because we have our own holiday we celebrate every year that we made up called t-rex day and because i like the idea of santa that a magical being brings presents and i like the idea of giving presents anonymously we do those things but not with santa instead my partner and i make something up every year that would be funny to say had snuck into the house and left gifts and thats what cards are signed with when my child is old enough i will ask my child to make up something to bring gifts and to be part of that. the first year it was t-rex who snuck into our home and left gifts which was fun and is why we call it t-rex day. the other big thing about t-rex day is that the gifts are small and are ideally hand made. we also have a "buying holiday" which means we wait for sales that happen after xmas and after new years and get one big fun thing for the whole family or a big thing we all need. i hope that soon we can et a piano for the buying holiday but probably not for a few years this year we will probably get something less expensive and more needed maybe something for the kitchen.


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## aprildawn (Apr 1, 2004)

My kids know Santa isn't real, but Santa is still part of our Christmas celebration. They watch the TV shows about Santa, we have Santa books, the presents in their stocking are "from Santa." They know we're pretending, but it's still fun.

That's what my parents did. Same with DH. So it was a no-brainer for us what we'd do about Santa.

Santa is part of the cultural celebration of Christmas. I see no reason to cut Santa completely out of the picture. But I'm not comfortable with lying to my kids no matter how fun it is. I think we've found a happy medium.

I kinda wish Santa was real.


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