# What music does your preteen listen to?



## Lilac (Jul 5, 2003)

: Just became very unpopular with preteen son tonight. He talked me into buying him a Good Charlotte CD. I'd never heard of this band and there was no rating on the case. After we got it home, I read the lyrics. Such lovely songs about robbing and killing people, suicide, alcoholic fathers that walk out on their families... We sat down and I explained why I had to do it, then I took the CD away. He was mad, of course, but I think on some level he didn't want to admit to, he understood. Anyway, I promised him I'd replace it, but I honestly don't know what to replace it with. I feel like such a relic - I haven't even heard of most of the bands he and his friends talk about. He's outgrown all the little kids music and he's not really interested in any of my Zeppelin or Beatles. The only thing we've been able to agree on lately is Creed. What are your preteens listening to? Any suggestions for us?


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## AnnMarie (May 21, 2002)

As long as there isn't too much swearing, killing, and/or raping in the music I let my kids listen to it. I listen to the same type of music they do, always have, and I'm fine.







<---See.









Walmart only sells censored music. Maybe that would be an option?


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## Irishmommy (Nov 19, 2001)

Shania Twain, Shania Twain and Shania Twain. And some classical.

She is almost 10, and hates Britney Spears. But Shania is the be all and end all here. But I don't have a problem with her lyrics.


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## lab (Jun 11, 2003)

My son is 10. I monitor all of his TV and music.

Now I do like Good Charlotte. Well, I should say I like the one song they have, The Anthem. I haven't heard the entire CD.

My son started having a pretty hard time at around 7. I do give in on some things, just because I feel like I need to pick my battles for when it really counts.

My son only hears music that I have already listened to. I make Cd's for him so he isn't coming to me with stuff he's already heard.

An example was Jak and Daxter. He really wanted the Jak II playstation game. I let my brother give it to him for Christmas. Oh man, the look on his face was priceless! I knew it was rated T, but I wanted him to feel like he fit, ykwim? Anyway, it started off ok, but the more he played, the more violent it got, so after about 2 weeks, I took it. He was disappointed, but that was about it.

My parents freaked about the music I listened to (ozzy, megadeath, priest, maiden etc) but it wasn't about raping people







: It was certainly angry but I do believe it is more than just teenagers needing their own identity.

I know for sure that at 16 years old he will listen to whatever he wants to listen to. And I absolutely will not try to control that. I would be crazy to do that (JMHO!). But for now, at 10, I'm going to protect him as long as I can. Just because society as a whole is growing kids up sooner doesn't mean they have the skills to deal with it....... I don't want my 10 year old listening to angry music.

Good for you mom! As long as you guys are talking about it and he knows you love him and have his best interests at heart, that's all you can do....

Good Luck

Lisa


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## lab (Jun 11, 2003)

Sheesh, I'm goofy. I didn't answer your post!

My kids listen to linkin park (edited - well anything I list would be listened to edited), rob thomas (can't think of the band now!), really all top 40. If your son wants to hear fast, teen angst type music, I would suggest getting music from the mid to late 90's. It's a little cleaner and maybe your son could start something new?

My kids love select Rob Zombie music. It's loud with an awesome sound! How about old nirvana.

I can't think tonight...... My dd loves Red Hot chili peppers and the doors. Ok let's see, Bare naked ladies......

My husband loves eminem and nelly, but I won't let the kids listen to that. You can't even edit that out!







:


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## barjem (Nov 30, 2001)

We as parents need to know our childrens intrests... But I have always told my children to "make good choices" (i know it sounds corney but they now repeat it to their friends, and it tickles me to hear that) and the media and music industry worries me the most, and it is a hard call.
I make sure they share their cd's with us and make sure they know the "deeper meaning" of the song.
Good Charlote would NOT be on me list because the content of the lyrics.(beside my kids hate punk-rock).
As ,much as i hate Wal-Mart i can apprceite their stand on selling only censored music.
Bands my kids listen to are: Nirvana, Queen, Ra, Coldplay, and classical music (WE LOVE YO-YO MA!)
Please do not discourage listening to music... it is a beautiful thing!
Make good choices!


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## Arduinna (May 30, 2002)

dd isn't a preteen anymore and at that age was still listening to the same music we do. now at 14 she is into anime soundtracks the most.


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## Lilac (Jul 5, 2003)

The Good Charlotte CD I bought was from WalMart. Is that true that they only sell censored music? But censored for what? And for what ages? This CD with songs where the singer calls his father a "D_CK", songs that glorify suicide, songs that advocate robbing people just because they're rich and have more than you (I can go on here...), is NOT OK with me for my 9 and 11 year olds to listen to. I realize that once they're in their teens, they will listen to whatever they want and if they want to listen to music with that kind of content, then I won't be able to stop them. I guess WalMart must be censoring with teen listeners in mind. But what about younger kids that are still very impressionable and look up to these singers and think they're so cool? That kinda scares me. I still want to steer my kids toward some more wholesome music while I still have control over their choices.


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## Dar (Apr 12, 2002)

I don't believe in censorship. Rain listen to whatever she wants in her room... in the car we compromise, because I have to listen too.

She actually listens to a lot of broadway show tunes... of course, they sing about rape in The Fantastiks, and drugs in Hair, so I'm not sure the content is any different but I like the music better.

She knew all of Rocky Horror by the time she was 7, anyway...

I don't think listening to music about drugs and sex makes people go out and do drugs and have sex...

Dar


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## CincoDeMama (Dec 9, 2001)

my oldest (14.5) would love for me to buy him the following artists' cds...(we burn 'clean' versions onto cds for him instead)

nelly
da band
pdid
gunit
etc-you get the picture.

~but i won't. he can buy it when he's 18-because honestly, i have a hard enough time keeping his mouth clean enough to be around my younger children without him running around rapping about smokin' weed & drinkin' gin.

my 11yo listens to the radio mostly, whatever's on the pop station (except christina ag & britney sp-she likes everyone but them, lol). she especially likes jo-lo & beyonce'.

my 9yo likes whatever's on the radio, as does my 2yo.


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## PikkuMyy (Mar 26, 2004)

Hi,

I'm neither a mommy yet, nor a teenager still, but young enough to rememebr (26). My mother listened to nothing but Classical music and as a teenager, I listened to Goth, Industrial, Grunge, New Wave, Punk, and Hardcore. Slightly different from classical. What I did to try to share was have "music nights" where I'd pick out some of my current favorite songs and we'd just sit together and listen to them. She could ask me questions and I'd try to explain why I liked them, etc. I don't know how much it helped but I was trying to bridge the gap between our tastes. (I liked classical as well, and still do, along with a lot of other types of music.)

BTW - although I hate stuff like Eminem and I hope to God my kids won't listen to stuff like that, I listened to a lot of music that talked about drugs, sex, death, etc. I waited until I was 18 to have sex with someone I loved, I've never done anything more than a few puffs of ....a few times, never killed or even hit anyone or thought about suicide even when I was REALLY depressed in HS, and I'm a very healthy happy person. My parents never attempted to censor what I listened to and if they had, I would have gone out of my way to hear those songs/bands, and done things on purpose to let them know.


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## MommaCheesehead (May 4, 2003)

We haven't really crossed that bridge yet. He'll be 12 this week but has never really been into music. He's a gaming freak and I've never done a lot to censor what he plays. He has many T rated games and has for several years.

He's a smart kid (straight A student) with a very good head on his shoulders. What he sees on those video games is no worse than what he sees when we turn on the news or any other television programs these days. He knows right from wrong and the difference between fantasy and reality.

That being said, I don't think I will do much in the way of music censorship when he starts expressing an interest in it.


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## calgal007 (Nov 20, 2001)

I bought my ds the Grammy-nominated songs CD. If it's on there, it has to be radio play-friendly.

I think Eminem is brilliant and hilarious, but he's a little over the top for my pre-teen.

Ds won't listen to "hillbilly music". He likes Avril Lavigne, Digimon soundtrack, Clockstoppers soundtrack, Freaky Friday soundtrack, and Eric Clapton, some Neil Young (Mom's choice!) and Fountains of Wayne.


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## calgal007 (Nov 20, 2001)

Quote:

What he sees on those video games is no worse than what he sees when we turn on the news or any other television programs these days.
Not to flame you, but what he sees when you turn on the news or tv programs isn't appropriate in the first place. Also, the tv news doesn't show a car crash, or a shooting death, for example, "caused" by your ds's part in a violent game.


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## lab (Jun 11, 2003)

calgal









ITA!!!!


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## Dar (Apr 12, 2002)

Quote:

_Originally posted by calgal007_
*Not to flame you, but what he sees when you turn on the news or tv programs isn't appropriate in the first place. Also, the tv news doesn't show a car crash, or a shooting death, for example, "caused" by your ds's part in a violent game.*
How can *you* know what's appropriate for *her* kid?

My daughter loves to devise new and better ways to kill off her Sims families - building a house with no doors, no smoke alarms, many rugs, and many fireplaces generally results in big fires, poor with no ladders result in drownings, etc. - but she knows that that's pretend. CSI Miami and Law and Order are pretend, too. Songs about rape and murder are not real rapes and murders. Shakespeare write plays about people killing each other, but it's pretend. On the other hand, the TV news and the newspaper are about real people... sensationalized real people, perhaps, but real people.

Dar


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## calgal007 (Nov 20, 2001)

Maybe my ds is just a pacifistic, mellow guy, but he would never go into a fantasy game purposely killing the characters.

You're right, I guess if that behavior is appropriate in other families, it's not for me to comment on it publically.


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## MommaCheesehead (May 4, 2003)

I don't feel like I'm being flamed. We all choose to parent our children in different ways. I respect your choices to limit the amount of violence your children are exposed to.

I don't have issues with letting him play violent games. He knows they are pretend and it doesn't manifest itself in his behavior at all. He's a very mellow & well-adjusted almost-12-year-old boy.


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## calgal007 (Nov 20, 2001)

Thanks, MommaCheesehead. Are you originally from Wisconsin????


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## calgal007 (Nov 20, 2001)

P.S. Happy Birthday to your DS!!!!!!


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## MommaCheesehead (May 4, 2003)

Nope, not from WI







I've used this name on different boards for years and I get that question quite a bit.

We were in the midst of a Stinky Cheeseman book addiction when I chose it.

This thread really has me thinking. Although I don't regret the way I've raised Damian, I do find myself doing many things differently with my two little ones.

I find I'm sheltering my toddler from many of the programs I had no issues with DS #1 watching. Shows such as The Rugrats and the like. There's a lot of negativity in that show. Parent's not watching their children, Angelica screaming at the babies and calling them names, etc. I've also weaned some old books out of our collection that I never would have deemed as inappropriate for Damian.

I guess I chalk it up to being older, wiser and more of a pacifist than I used to be.


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## calgal007 (Nov 20, 2001)

My ds #2 is eleven years younger than his older bro, ds #1. I do much more screening of #2's movies, tv viewing, etc. than I did for #1.

Like you, I chalk it up to heightened pacifism on my part, and a fierce desire to protect "my baby" from violence in our world.

By the way, I am from Wisconsin!


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## WindyMoments04 (Apr 17, 2004)

We only listen to the radio. We never buy CDs. My husband watches MTV alot, and our 9 yr old watches too. Sometimes DH burns CDs, but we all listen to it. We dont like the Rap music or anything that is too full of hate, so it's not even an issue here.
When he is older and wants to be into his 'own' music, then that will be ok with me!


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