# Siblings Sharing Room Due to Necessity



## Ruthla (Jun 2, 2004)

I've seen a lot of threads lately about siblings sleeping together as a natural outgrowth of co-sleeping, but that's not my situation.

I have my 9 and 10yo dds sharing a room because we live in a 2 bedroom apt and are moving into a smaller 2 bdrm apt. I'll be sharing a room with my son indefinetely- although there is the possibility of giving him his own room and me sleeping in the living room at some point in the future.

Both girls have expressed interest in having their own rooms. There are constant squabbles about having to share space- 'It's not fair that my sister messes up my area" and "My sister is nagging me about my mess". If I could afford a 4 bedroom house, the girls would each have their own rooms right now, and Jack would have his own room set up but would be allowed to sleep with me for as long as he needed. That isn't an option right now.

Every single family in this area can afford separate rooms for their children. They don't know ANYBODY, besides themselves, who has to share a room with a sibling.

Anybody else dealing with something like this? How do you handle it? How do you teach the children to get along better?


----------



## anjelika (May 16, 2004)

Hi Ruth,

My sister and I had to share a room due to circumstance from 1990 until 2002 (when I married and moved out permanently). Since we had different personalities, likes and dislikes, sleeping schedules it was challenging! The only thing that will help is time and parental involvment when settling disputes.

My parents put down some ground rules. Since I was the night owl, I was to be courteous when preparing for bed (not turn the main light on, use a small table lamp, etc.). We were to give each other creative space (no putting a poster over the sibling's poster) and not take the sibling's stuff without receiving permission. And concerning messes? Make them both accountable. Obviously, this didn't work all the time, but it gave my parents something to work with.

But seriously - time will help. The preteen stage had the most fighting for my sister and I. It will get better! (And if not, somebody will move out at some point! :LOL )


----------



## PoppyMama (Jul 1, 2004)

Good question. I also struggle with this but I have a twist. I have an 8/dd and 6/ds, they share a room because I can't get a 3 bedroom. Here is the kicker, I would be willing to give up my room so they could each have a room but they won't sleep in their room if they are alone so we would all be in the living room. I worry because I know there is coming a time when it is actually illegal for opposite sex children to share a room. I wouldn't worry about the legality but I am a single mom and I always have to keep these things in mind since they can be used against me.


----------



## ~*max*~ (Dec 23, 2002)

Illegal? Really?


----------



## PancakeGoddess (Oct 8, 2004)

my two kids share a bedroom, but my oldest especially benefits from private space. we installed curtain on a wire that's mounted easily at the ceiling with hardware like this from ikea and it works great. it was very easy. I wish I could show you a picture of how it works...

we don't even use a curtain - just buy the clips and put up a cool sheet


----------



## Ruthla (Jun 2, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *benjalo*
my two kids share a bedroom, but my oldest especially benefits from private space. we installed curtain on a wire that's mounted easily at the ceiling with hardware http://perth.ikea.com.au/prod_template4.asp?product_id=21990&se_id=37&page_ id=40300300251009&Cat=16&Scat=68 from ikea and it works great. it was very easy. I wish I could show you a picture of how it works...

we don't even use a curtain - just buy the clips and put up a cool sheet

The link isn't working


----------



## PancakeGoddess (Oct 8, 2004)

does this one work?

http://tinyurl.com/bg5fp


----------



## UUMom (Nov 14, 2002)

It's against the foster care laws, but there is no US law about sibs sharing a room.

My children (6 & 12, 16 & 11) share rooms and it's not been a problem at all.

I like the idea of separating with a curtain. If that becomes an issue here, I will def use that idea!


----------



## Ruthla (Jun 2, 2004)

Thanks, its working now.

They key, of course, is to find a logical place to PUT the curtain, so that they can each get to their own beds, clothing, etc with the curtain closed.


----------



## Ravin (Mar 19, 2002)

Definitely providing each their own part of the room, w/ a central "shared" area can be a good way of dealing w/ it. To maximize space, have you considered getting them loft beds? Then they'd each have their own private space underneath their beds for a desk or just to hang a "keep out" sign and close a curtain. Curtains to go around the beds can be another way to give them each a private space.


----------



## PoppyMama (Jul 1, 2004)

Thanks all. That is a load off. When they get a little older I will do the curtain thing or I have always liked the idea of copying ship type bunks.


----------



## applejuice (Oct 8, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *~*max*~*
Illegal? Really?

As far as public housing, HUD, section 8 after a certain age are concerned, yes, it is illegal.

Furthermore, when calculating legitimate occupancy, the agencies figure that no more than two people to a bedroom should occupy the unit. So if you are renting out a three bedroom apartment, you should have no more than six people on the lease, including babies; although, some jurisdictions have made exceptions to this rule since housing is short.

- landlord of twenty years experience.


----------



## applejuice (Oct 8, 2002)

My own personal experience:

I grew up in a family of nine children, two boys, seven girls, two parents= eleven.

By the time I was seventeen, there were four bedrooms:

my parents had one bedroom with the baby,----3
I shared a bedroom with two other sisters, ---- 3
My brothers shared a bedroom,------------------2
The other bedroom had the younger girls,-----+3

Grand Total----------------------------------------11

Not bad!

When I was younger there were three bedrooms, which changed as the family grew; when we moved into this house, there were three girls and one on the way.


----------



## applejuice (Oct 8, 2002)

Ruthla, most single parents I know in your position do what you are doing, use the living room as their bedroom and let the kiddies have the two bedrooms.


----------



## Ravin (Mar 19, 2002)

Only single mama I know is my sister, who has a one bedroom which she shares w/ her 5 yo dd (they do separate beds now but niece still crawls in w/ her some).

As long as they don't mind, there's nothing wrong (or illegal) w/ opp sex kids sharing a room, although there are, as someone mentioned, HUD guidelines that are relevant if you're recieving assistance (in which case it's on them to put you in a house/apt big enough to meet the guidelines for your family and enable you to afford it).

In tight circumstances, I could totally see having a family bedroom (w/ whatever arrangements of beds seemed best), that is used for sleeping, and use the second bedroom for playroom or whatever else, and to enable each person to have some corner of the house (a desk, a play space, whatever) that's theirs alone, not necessarily a bedroom/sleep space.


----------



## USAmma (Nov 29, 2001)

My two girls will share a room for quite awhile. We have a 3br home but one room is an office with no closet. We are using it as an office for dh's work. They are still very young so I can't give any advice about how to work it out.

My mom's side had many cousins, large families, and almost everyone I knew shared a room until they left home. My dh and his sister also shared a room until he left home. It worked out just fine. They locked the door if they were getting dressed and needed privacy. They had matching furniture and each stayed out of the other's dresser.


----------



## Alkenny (May 4, 2004)

As far as I know, foster care is the only thing that governs opposite sexes sharing the same room. Just being on assistance doesn't (if you know differently, prove me wrong...links, please!) The only thing "assistance" demands is that they each have their own bed.

As for Ruthla, my oldest two share a room and complain about each other all the time...but they complain about each other no matter if it's their room/space or ANYTHING/EVERYTHING.

I remember being the same with my younger sister too. It's just the "sibling thing".


----------



## ~*max*~ (Dec 23, 2002)

Thanks for the info about the opposite sex "laws". I honestly never knew such a thing existed. We have a three bedroom house right now - one room for dh, baby & me, one room for our 17 year old dn, and one room for 3 year old dd and 5 year old ds. Dd & ds really like sharing a room. In fact, if we moved to a bigger house, I think they would still want to be in the same room, even if they could have their own. In fact, they look forward to the baby moving in w/them. (I'll enjoy it while it lasts.







)


----------



## Momtwice (Nov 21, 2001)

Quote:

Every single family in this area can afford separate rooms for their children. They don't know ANYBODY, besides themselves, who has to share a room with a sibling.
How frustrating for you. What helps me at times like this are to remember that:
*in my opinion, only a small percentage of the world population is wealthy enough to have their own room
*in my opinion, sharing a room is good for most kids, and is fantastic practice for adult life, negotiating skills etc
*I know a very very wealthy family who encourages their kids to share rooms even though they could easily afford cavernous, spacious rooms for each kid and I admire them for that choice
*I know two situations of people using the living room as a third bedroom

I am very glad I shared a room as a kid, and very glad my kids share a room.


----------



## DebraBaker (Jan 9, 2002)

My 10 and 13 yo sons share their bedroom because I have a five bedroom house and five kids still at home. For the most part they do well getting along but the 13yo is add and a pain in the ass. He's sloppy and disorganized and drives his brother to distraction but when its time for bed both are glad the other is with them (for the most part).

I have a media room in between the two boys rooms that could easily be converted into another bedroom if the boys became truely incompatible and Jon (oldest son) will be going to college in two years but so far so good.

Debra Baker


----------



## Greaseball (Feb 1, 2002)

My two girls share a room not out of absolute necessity, but rather to maintain a standard of living to which we have become accustomed. They have their room, then there is the master bedroom, and then the computer room with the spare bed. Dh often sleeps in there due to things like snoring, etc.

We just moved from a 4-bedroom place where dh and I had our own rooms and the girls each had their own, but we decided to try having them share as opposed to putting a spare bed in the living room. So far it's working well, but I wouldn't do it that way when they were older.

When I lived with my dad I had to share a tiny bedroom with two siblings. It sucked. We had bunk beds, and I slept on the bottom bunk and I had a curtain I could pull around for privacy. That helped a lot.


----------



## onlyzombiecat (Aug 15, 2004)

I shared a room with my sister most of our growing up because we had to- the worst was when we had to share a bed for awhile. We were 3 years apart in age and didn't always get along. My brother got the odd spaces to sleep (attic, living room, etc.).

On a positive note- I think sharing a room with my sister helped me to learn how to live with someone so when I went to college I got along well with roommates.
We had a bunk bed and 2 desks. We had designated sheves for our books & stuff.

I really like the idea of loft beds to create some personal space in the room. http://www.collegebedlofts.com/youth_lofts.html
You could also get 2 different large rugs to visually divide the floor space in the room.
Also maybe a shelf unit, trunk or locker for each of them- where they can put away things they don't want to share. Maybe color code or label their stuff.

http://www.homemakingcottage.com/cle...g4siblings.htm
http://www.the-n.com/checkit/article...articleID=1042
http://www.uktvstyle.co.uk/index.cfm...aid/1485.shtml

Don't step in all the time with their room issues. They should be able to work it out eventually between them. Maybe have them make a list of rules for their room that they both agree to.
http://www.scholastic.com/schoolage/...keringsibs.htm


----------



## granolamom (Sep 30, 2002)

MY girls( now 18,16 and11) have always shared a room in one equation or another. I believe now they have each shared with the other at least once.

Right now our 16 and 11 are sharing.....WE have never really had any problems. DD1 and DD2 had some tension a few years ago but we told them they had to work it out( now they are best friends)......Heck I don't always enjoy sharing a romm with my DH !!!

THey will be fine...closer for it!!

Peace,
Granolamom


----------



## Aura_Kitten (Aug 13, 2002)

when i was a child, for years i shared a room w/ one of my older sisters... of course there were squabbles but we learned o work through them, and honesly i think it really ended up strengthening the bond between us, and securing our idea of family as a *unit* rather than a collection of individuals...

now, my two kids share a room (although my dd still cosleeps), and my sister's 4 kids all share a room, and it seems to really help develop sibling bonds and their ability to use diplomacy + cooperation, make compromises, etc.

i guess what i'm trying to say is ~ if $ forces them to share space, well -- deal with it. they will learn to live with it.







and, remember: there is absolutely nothing wrong with being different! if nothing else, it builds character.


----------



## snuggly mama (Mar 29, 2004)

My 10yo dd shares a room w/ her 4 yo sister, and it certainly isn't ideal but it works. Ds has his own room, but for a long time (in our old house), he shared a room w/dd. They actually preferred being in the same room while they were both younger. We'll probably be moving dd (4) back downstairs to the family room/playroom for her bedroom for a couple of reasons. She's got some special needs that make her being upstairs problematic, and dd (10) really is starting to need some private space. The downstairs space isn't a bedroom (no closet), but it will work for now. In my personal opinion, you do what works. When dd was on dialysis as a baby, she had to have her own room because of germ issues, etc., so dh and I slept in the living room (when we slept at all!). Maybe it would help to think of the rooms in your house without their "names", kwim? Like, the living room is just space that can be used for multiple things, including sleeping. The bedrooms are for sleeping and playing, or whatever. Would it be nice for everyone who wanted their own room to have one? Sure, but that doesn't mean other arrangements can't work.


----------



## applejuice (Oct 8, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Momtwice*
*in my opinion, only a small percentage of the world population is wealthy enough to have their own room
*in my opinion, sharing a room is good for most kids, and is fantastic practice for adult life, negotiating skills etc
*I know a very very wealthy family who encourages their kids to share rooms even though they could easily afford cavernous, spacious rooms for each kid and I admire them for that choice
*I know two situations of people using the living room as a third bedroom

As a big sister who never had her own room, ITA, however, I have actually read opinions by social workers in high state offices and places in the CPS system that stated emphatically that sharing a room was child abuse, as well as using hand-me-downs as clothing and passing on cosmetic surgery as rhinoplasty.

It made me wonder what kind of society we are creating when attitudes like these are spouted off by so-called experts.


----------



## JenniferH (Feb 24, 2005)

I grew up in a family of 6 in a 3BR house. We had my parents, 2 girls, and 2 boys so we had to share bedrooms.

It would have been a lot easier on both of us if we'd had bunk beds or loft beds and had more floor space (we shared a double bed). Loft beds would have been ideal because we could have hung a curtain on each one for privacy. My brothers had bunk beds, but they also had the smaller room.

I never thought it was fair either, but there wasn't much choice in the matter. It was either share a room or sleep in the barn







.

If your kids decide to live in a dorm situation in college, they will most likely be sharing a room with one or more people....may as well get used to having roommates now.


----------



## Myboysmom (Nov 19, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Momtwice*
How frustrating for you. What helps me at times like this are to remember that:
*in my opinion, only a small percentage of the world population is wealthy enough to have their own room
*in my opinion, sharing a room is good for most kids, and is fantastic practice for adult life, negotiating skills etc
*I know a very very wealthy family who encourages their kids to share rooms even though they could easily afford cavernous, spacious rooms for each kid and I admire them for that choice
*I know two situations of people using the living room as a third bedroom

I am very glad I shared a room as a kid, and very glad my kids share a room.

My sister and I shared a room nearly ALL OF OUR LIVES!!! I don't have a problem with it, though I hated it at the time. But my parents weren't "keen" on any of us have privacy!

My two youngest share a room and probably will for a long time. I am trying to formulate a plan to redo their room so that they each have more personal/private space. Drawing a curtain around each bunk is something we had already planned on! thanks for the hardware link!


----------



## Ruthla (Jun 2, 2004)

We're not in a position to buy any more furniture. My parents recently (in the past 2 years) bought them rather expensive twin beds and are not at all open to the idea of replacing them with something more space-efficient. The furniture in their bedroom used to belong to my late great aunt and uncle. I have my parents' old bedroom set.

The new house is about half the size of our current one- we won't be able to take all our furniture with us and I'm not sure which pieces will have to be given away before we move.


----------



## Momtwice (Nov 21, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *applejuice*
I have actually read opinions by social workers in high state offices and places in the CPS system that stated emphatically that sharing a room was child abuse,


There is something messed up when a culture insists that leaving an infant alone crying until they throw up is healthy parenting, but sharing a room is abuse.

I was always terrified of being alone at night.

And grateful for a loving big sister.


----------



## lula (Feb 26, 2003)

My dd will be sharing a room with her sibling, when we have our next child. (when I finally get her into a room







)

I don't care if I have a huge house I think sharing a room is good. Negotiations, space issues, problem solving plus even when there is conflict I think the relationship is enhanced. If there was a severe problem I would obviously reconsider but in general I think it is a good thing.

I know our fighting drove my mother crazy when I was growing up but I still feel closer to my sister because of the amount of time where we HAD to be in the same room.

lula


----------



## flminivanmama (Nov 21, 2001)

Ruth my 3 children share a room right now - we live in a 2 bedroom/ 1 bath, but they don't care (yet! they just aren't old enough LOL)

my sister and I shared a room all our lives - she is 20 months younger than me. we lived in a 3 bedroom an my brother had his own room. plus we went to college and ha room mates and sleepaway camp, etc... LOL

yes we fought! and we hated it! but I think we also liked it! the first time I ever lived alone I think I was about 25!! and I reallly missed having her there! LOL

we used to put tape in the middle of the room. we had bunkbeds and we fought over who slept on the top. oy.

but you know what? if we didn't share a room I'm sure we still would have fought! LOL


----------



## flapjack (Mar 15, 2005)

To answer the OP- do your girls understand why there is no way that they could have their own rooms? Has it actually been spelt out to them "this is how much I earn- these are our bills- this is how much a 2/3/4 bedroom house costs??"
If they do, I'd suggest you try and get some money put aside for fixing their room up- whatever you can spare, but be creative in re-using and recycling as well, describe the problem and ask them how they're going to fix it. At 9 and 10, they probably have VERY strong ideas on how this should work.


----------



## Momtwice (Nov 21, 2001)

Forgot to add...I know more than one person who felt lonely in their own rooms as a child. (Never had my own myself...)


----------



## witchbaby (Apr 17, 2003)

it is highly unlikely that my kids will ever have their own rooms. it will be a number of years before we can afford to buy a house and we simply can't afford anything more than a two bedroom rental (the price jump between two and three bedrooms is astonishing around here). we also do not like the idea of large houses occupying huge amounts of land but housing only 2 or 3 people. thus, we'll most likely have a small house with 2 bedrooms and perhaps a basement (finished or not, doesn't really matter) for a rec room and possible second bedroom when one of them wants it. :LOL even as an only child, i moved into our basement rec room at 15 to get away from my parents!
this is a great thread. for some reason i hadn't even had the thought of loft beds! that really does make a difference in personal space. i'll have to remember all these ideas!


----------



## PoppyMama (Jul 1, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *applejuice*
As a big sister who never had her own room, ITA, however, I have actually read opinions by social workers in high state offices and places in the CPS system that stated emphatically that sharing a room was child abuse, as well as using hand-me-downs as clothing and passing on cosmetic surgery as rhinoplasty.

It made me wonder what kind of society we are creating when attitudes like these are spouted off by so-called experts.

Could you give a short rundown of their reasons. I am really curious, I never thought of room sharing as child abuse. I do know and understand the arguments for not having boy/girl rooms but I never heard anyone say same sex room sharing was abusive.

I couldn't make my kids have their own room, they would never go into them :LOL . I know there will come a day when they will want privacy from each other and I will have to work that out but they still don't like to go to the bathroom alone so...


----------



## flminivanmama (Nov 21, 2001)

Lorrie - that's why we are renting a 2 bedroom also - the price break between a 2 an 3 was really huge and something we could NOT pay.


----------



## KermitMissesJim (Feb 12, 2004)

Alkenny, I do not have a link, but our rent is paid by assistance while we are in school, and it says in our contract that we must provide opposite-sex siblings with their own room when the oldest is 5. Of course, the assistors do not live with me, and cannot be expected to know that 5yo ds and 2yo dd are so happy sharing a room (they have bunk beds).

We DO have a 3rd bedroom, it is the playroom and will likely stay that way, even after the newest bean joins us in the fall.

My first college dorm was a triple with a huge walk-in closet. I shared it with two girls who chose it for the closet--neither of them had ever shared a room and it was a tough adjustment. We always had enough bedrooms growing up but shared anyway, so we could have a playroom. I'm grateful that I learned to share living space.


----------



## Alkenny (May 4, 2004)

Re: Opposite sex siblings sharing a room. I've googled and googled and can't find ANYTHING that says they cannot. I have found that those who get Section 8 housing assistance can get a 3rd bedroom for the opposite sexes over age 5 *but you don't HAVE to separate them, just that you can qualify for a larger apartment this way*.

Again, if anyone can find anything I'm truly interested. When the time comes that mine don't want to share, DH and I will be investing in a sleeper sofa anyways.


----------



## Thursday Girl (Mar 26, 2004)

I was one of 5 kids and my parents growing up. only once (for almost two years) did i have my own room in the 17 years I lived at home. I liked sharing better. In one house two of my sisters and I shared a room. we used duct tape on the floor to sperate the spaces. IN another we had bunk beds. I don't remember us fighting any more or less when we were sharing as opposed to the two years we had our own rooms. siblings fight. and now i am really close with all my sisters. at one time my mom slept in the dining room, and my two sisters and i shared the living room and took turns on the couch. there own space is probably key

edited to add

when new baby is born they will share a room even if they are opposite sex. we have three bedrooms. But the back bedroom is going to be ours after DH puts in a master bath and DH and I agreed we didn't want our child to have a bedroom with so many windows facing the street. maybe we are a little paranoid. but it's ok. the front room will be a playroom for the kids. we also might put a smallish bed of some sorts or a couch in there we're Jewely can nap or rest if unborn baby is nappiong in the bedroom.


----------



## saratchka (May 2, 2005)

My sister and I shared a bedroom until I started high school. I remember hating it and loving it, of course.









One of the things my parents did to make more space for us was to switch us to fold out chairs instead of beds. They were just foam chairs that folded out flat to be used as a bed. (like this: http://www.jcpenney.com/jcp/Products...ItemId=0b168e6) Every morning we'd pull off the sheets, stick them in a drawer, and fold the mattresses into chairs. That left nearly the entire room free for our activities and helped us not to feel too squished. It didn't help much with privacy, but the curtain idea is great for that, and probably not too expensive.

DH and I both like the idea of our kids sharing a room, at least for a while. Granted we're still waiting on our first, but the plan is to have a second and let them share a bedroom. We have three bedrooms, but our families live far away and we often (maybe 25% of the time) have overnight guests, so our guest room isn't something we'll give up lightly!


----------



## choli (Jun 20, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *applejuice*
As a big sister who never had her own room, ITA, however, I have actually read opinions by social workers in high state offices and places in the CPS system that stated emphatically that sharing a room was child abuse, as well as using hand-me-downs as clothing and passing on cosmetic surgery as rhinoplasty.

It made me wonder what kind of society we are creating when attitudes like these are spouted off by so-called experts.

How elitist. When I lived in Ireland as a teenager, my best friend was the 3rd oldest of 12, all of whom still lived at home, as well as both parents.

They had a two bedroom house. The baby slept with the parents in their room. Full size bed.

The girls (16, 13, 3) shared a bedroom with the 3 youngest boys (2, 4, 6). In three twin beds, big girl/little boy, big girl/little girl, little boy/little boy.

The older boys (15, 11, 9, 9, 8) slept in the living room. Full bed and two singles.

The kitchen was big, and as was common there at the time, was used as a combination kitchen/family room.

By the way, this was not at all unusual for the time and place. The average number of children was less, around 6 or 7, but very few houses had more than 3 bedroom, often only two. If you told people there that it was child abuse to hand down clothes or share a room with one other child, they'd laugh you to shame. I slept over at my friends house a few times (!), but she preferred sleeping over at mine. I was the only girl I knew who had her own room. It's not abuse, it's a place to sleep. Ask a homeless family on the street if it would be abuse to share a room.


----------



## magnoliablue (Dec 29, 2002)

This is an interesting thread,as we may be in this predicament soon. We will be going from everyone having their own room, to the boys most likely sharing a room, and my dd still having her own room. My older son is surprisingly ok with it at the moment. I had thought the idea of him sharing his space with a 4 year old brother would not go over well, but so far he is fine with it. Considering they rarely spent time in their rooms right now, save for sleeping, maybe it might actually work.
As to the legal issue, we have the three kids and two of us and have been looking at three bedrooms, and no one has asked or said anything about my dd and sons not being permitted to share a room together..not a word. I do not know if they can technically enforce this, considering the shortage of housing, and houses with more than 3 bedrooms, but I could be wrong. I also never heard of this in real estate school.


----------



## flminivanmama (Nov 21, 2001)

ruth I want to add that even though we hated sharing a room growing up when we came home from college we could have slept seperately (on the couch downstairs or in my brothers room) but we almost always stayed together and that the night before my wedding we slept in the same room too


----------



## calpurnia (Sep 26, 2004)

The legal sitatuation in the UK re room sharing is that there should be enough rooms in a rental property so that no male & female over the age of 10 should have to share a room unless married or cohabitating. If you are housed in council accomodation then they have to move you into a bigger house once you reach that age. These rules don't apply to private occupancy in the same way./end basically irrelevant information that I felt compelled to throw in!


----------



## flapjack (Mar 15, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *calpurnia*
The legal sitatuation in the UK re room sharing is that there should be enough rooms in a rental property so that no male & female over the age of 10 should have to share a room unless married or cohabitating. If you are housed in council accomodation then they have to move you into a bigger house once you reach that age. These rules don't apply to private occupancy in the same way./end basically irrelevant information that I felt compelled to throw in!

Or, to clarify. If you rent your home from the council or a housing association or you are buying your home through a shared ownership scheme, no mixed bedrooms after the eldest child hits 10- also, no more than 2 to a room. Often, individual councils have stricter rulings- for instance, in Colchester a child over 6 shouldn't share with an OS child and more than 2 children shouldn't share a room. (The assumption, interestingly, is that up to the first birthday baby is in with mummy







) If you privately rent or own your home, then you qualify after this point to spend the rest of your life on the council waiting list, waiting for that mythical creature, a 3/4 bedroomed council house. I know someone who knows someone who got one once...
Bitter? Me? Never...


----------



## urklemama (May 4, 2003)

You just as easily could make the case that it's abusive to let children think growing up having so much privacy and space is normal. I sure know a lot of people for whom roommates were a very rude awakening.


----------

