# question about Dr James Dobson



## Attached Mama (Dec 4, 2005)

I have heard that he espouses a doctrine of earthly perfection, meaning that it is possible to go thru life never doing anything wrong - no bad attitudes, words, mistakes etc.

Anyone know anythign about this? It would be good ammo to get my sister to rethink her love of him, as it is not a popularly held Christian doctrine.

Also, she says 2 of Dr Sears kid's (she thought he only had 2) both committed suicide.


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## Momma Aimee (Jul 8, 2003)

Quote:

Also, she says 2 of Dr Sears kid's (she thought he only had 2) both committed suicide.
I know little about Dobbson.

however

i have NEVER heard this about Dr Sears (who has 8, one adopted, and one with Downs)........i have so many of his books and so on -- they talk a great deal about family expereince, i doubt this would be "hidden" -- but i am not sure.

They also have a large number of grandkids now --

AImee


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## heartmama (Nov 27, 2001)

Dr. William Sears has 8 children. One of them, a son, is also an ap physician advocate. To my knowledge all of his children are alive.

http://iparenting.com/sears/bio.htm

I'm not familiar with that part of Dobson's doctrine. I'd do a google search and see if you can find a bibliography of his work, and go from there.


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## Andiad (Nov 6, 2006)

I'm not sure about Dr. Dobson but I do know that Dr. Sears has 8 children and unless something has happened recently, they are all still alive. Also, if you're looking for Christian references. Dr. Sears has a book on Christian Parenting. Hope that helps in talking to your sister.

https://www.askdrsears.com/store/detail.asp?pid=16


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## 2kids-mommy (Nov 6, 2006)

I think the rumor about Dr. Sears sons is being confused with the urban legend that the son of famous pediatrician Benjamin Spock committed suicide, which is also false. It was actually Spock's grandson.
http://www.snopes.com/medical/doctor/drspock.asp


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## PreggieUBA2C (Mar 20, 2007)

I don't know Dr Dobson's views, but can comment on the particular philosophical bent you've described. You are correct that it is not a normative christian doctrine; it is a Pelagian theory that you can quickly read about here:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pelagianism

Also, some christians believe that once salvation is received by an individual, he cannot sin anymore; again, not a normative christian doctrine, although I'm not sure of it's origin (dh would be; he's been studying theology for 12 years now).

Our family, while christian, rejects the notion of total depravity (from Calvin's T.U.L.I.P.) since as we live and walk in faith in Christ, we are continually sanctified (set apart and purified through the testing and transformative work of the Holy Spirit) and so it becomes less and less difficult to resist sin, which is sort of like a disease and not a description or definition of who we are, although while scriptural, this is not a widely-held belief either. It is possible that Dr. Dobson believes _this_, and if so, he has not strayed from the scriptures.

You would need more context to what you wrote in order to determine if his teachings are christian or not. I would reserve judgement until and unless I was sure.


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## ThreeBeans (Dec 2, 2006)

Dr. Dobson is a baby-beating, gay-hating, anti-AP









Dr. Sears has 8 children. The eldest two are also physicians and have entered into family practice with him and his wife, Martha, who is a nurse. None of them have committed suicide. Gawsh.


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## L&IsMama (Jan 24, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Attached Mama* 
I have heard that he espouses a doctrine of earthly perfection, meaning that it is possible to go thru life never doing anything wrong - no bad attitudes, words, mistakes etc.

Um,I think the only one who was able to achieve this was Jesus himself.


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## Attached Mama (Dec 4, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *L&IsMama* 
Um,I think the only one who was able to achieve this was Jesus himself.

I agree, but there is a fringe christian element that does not...


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## L&IsMama (Jan 24, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Attached Mama* 
I agree, but there is a fringe christian element that does not...

Ahh,I see. Hmm,well,I would just tell her to listen to the Bible,and not Dobson then.







: Sorry,I wish I had more in depth advice.


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## AimeeandBrian (Jul 23, 2006)

I don't think that Dobson teaches that. (My mom pretty much worshipped him and she would not have liked him saying that) However, I do believe that is part of the Pearls' theology.


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## Parker'smommy (Sep 12, 2002)

My friend is IN the Sears practice in San Clemente, Ca. and he is practicing with now THREE of his sons - Jim, Bob, and Peter just started practicing pediatrics this last year. My friend loves all of them. None of his children have committed suicide.

I agree with Aimee that it's the Pearls' who teach that theology.


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## my3peanuts (Nov 25, 2006)

I was raised in a "Dobson loving" household. My MIL worship him.









I have read most all his books.







: He does not believe what you described.

Thankfully I've come to see the light and no longer listen to Dobson.


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## Attached Mama (Dec 4, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Parker'smommy* 
My friend is IN the Sears practice in San Clemente, Ca. and he is practicing with now THREE of his sons - Jim, Bob, and Peter just started practicing pediatrics this last year. My friend loves all of them. None of his children have committed suicide.

I agree with Aimee that it's the Pearls' who teach that theology.

thanks for the recent update/clarification. now i can give my sister a definitive answr -not just tell her i couln't find anything on google.


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## GuildJenn (Jan 10, 2007)

This site is not about James Dobson but it is about the Ezzo stuff which may be similar.

http://ezzo.info/

Most of this is about the breastfeeding misinformation, but some of it talks about slapping hands, etc., which I know Dobson espouses. I think it's a useful read.

P.S. the "Voices of Experience" area is heart wrenching. But it has some interesting perspectives from parents who were spanking etc. and turned to AP.


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## marie1080 (Aug 5, 2006)

This may be slightly off topic, but since it is the GD forum...

I read a column by Dobson in my local paper this week in which he advocated corporal punishment. If I recall correctly, he was supporting it's use in school!







:







:


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## Roar (May 30, 2006)

This site has a good collection of quotes from Dobson. http://www.stoptherod.net/dobson.html


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## Trinitty (Jul 15, 2004)

Those quotes make me sick.

Thank you for posting them.

I guess I won't be buying "Bringing up Boys" afterall.


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## ThreeBeans (Dec 2, 2006)

If you want to read more about Dobson's 'parenting' techniques (which include whipping a FIFTEEN MONTH OLD BABY) read the Focus on the Family website. Be sure you have a strong somach.


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## L&IsMama (Jan 24, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ThreeBeans* 
If you want to read more about Dobson's 'parenting' techniques (which include whipping a FIFTEEN MONTH OLD BABY) read the Focus on the Family website. Be sure you have a strong somach.









What did you expect from a guy who said being whipped by his mother's girdle,with it's multitude of straps and buckles made him feel loved? uke


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## Evan&Anna's_Mom (Jun 12, 2003)

OK, I'm confused. I thought it was the Pearls that were into strong physical discipline of infants/toddlers. While I dislike Dobson for many, many reasons and I know he supports spanking, I didn't think he went to the same extremes in terms of age of children being punished or moving from spanking to beat/whipping. It doesn't help to exagerate the truth.


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## L&IsMama (Jan 24, 2006)

Did you read the link here about Dobson. I'm personally not exaggerating anything. The man said it made him feel loved to be hit with his mother's girdle.







:

[p.23-24 Dobson's mother once whipped him with a girdle that had "a multitude of straps and buckles." "Believe it or not, it made me feel loved." (!!) ] - from above link,and quoted right out of his book,no less.


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## PreggieUBA2C (Mar 20, 2007)

Okay, so I know about the Pearls and the Ezzos and had only heard of Dobson, until a littl while ago, but then forgot that I was reading his advice on child-raising- the stuff that made me literally feel sick so that I had to stop reading.

I was only commenting on the theological question OP asked, but now remembering Dobson, I'd not have even addressed it since I find his other views so dispicable. Ugh, disgusting.

I'd love to challenge any of these people to not just (illegitimately and fallaciously) proof-text their views on discipline with the holy scriptures, but to actually DERIVE a perspective from them. Doubtful, if they were honest, they'd have anything to say other than 'please forgive me'.


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## Dillpicklechip (Nov 10, 2006)

Ugh, those quotes from Dare to Discipline made me feel queasy. Especially since the form of discipline Dobson advocates is EXACTLY the way my parents raised me. They belonged to the Focus on the Family ministry and owned several of Dobson's books, in fact I think they did own that one.

I am nearing 30 years old and just now gaining self confidence and getting over my parents' harsh, unloving treatment of me. My husband was abused much worse than I was and at 31 he has not gotten over it.

It makes me so sad to think that this book is still in print and that people out there are following Dobson's advice, bringing up another generation of hurt, confused young people.







:


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## Momtwice (Nov 21, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *2kids-mommy* 
I think the rumor about Dr. Sears sons is being confused with the urban legend that the son of famous pediatrician Benjamin Spock committed suicide, which is also false. It was actually Spock's grandson.
http://www.snopes.com/medical/doctor/drspock.asp

Xposted with the other thread:

This link also mentions a famous parenting expert whose son did kill himself but that expert recommended the opposite style of discipline from Dr. Spock. So the ridiculous and sad implication that non-violent discipline will ruin your children doesn't really hold water, does it.

I'm in my 40's and old enough to remember Spock, but I never heard of Watson. Sometimes we forget how long the history of bossy parenting books is!


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## ThreeBeans (Dec 2, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Evan&Anna's_Mom* 
OK, I'm confused. I thought it was the Pearls that were into strong physical discipline of infants/toddlers. While I dislike Dobson for many, many reasons and I know he supports spanking, I didn't think he went to the same extremes in terms of age of children being punished or moving from spanking to beat/whipping. It doesn't help to exagerate the truth.

I didn't exaggerate a darned thing







:

He actively supports WHIPPING a 15 month old. In black and white.


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## Evan&Anna's_Mom (Jun 12, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ThreeBeans* 
I didn't exaggerate a darned thing







:

He actively supports WHIPPING a 15 month old. In black and white.

No, actually, he doesn't. I think we need to be careful about the language. Less so here where everyone is in basic agreement that Dobson is bad news and not to be emulated. Which I absolutely agree with, before this gets out of hand. I am NOT NOT NOT supporting him in any way and would never advocate for anything he says. But, when speaking with those who are less sure, with those that think maybe he is OK, then representing what he says falsely only hands those who support him a tool. They can say either we don't know what we are talking about or that we are distorting his words for to make our point, and we need to lie to make him look bad. The absolute truth is quite bad enough. We don't, in fact, need to exagerate.

He does advocate spanking toddlers. Not whipping because that actually requires a whip. You could say beating because he does say an implement is OK. And not babies because a 15 mo. old is not a baby, he is a toddler. And he does not advocate physical discipline before about age 1, which is the definition of baby. (The Pearls, however, do so your assertion is valid for them. Shudder.) Note that he cannot possibly be 15 months in his memory of his own mother's beating him with a girdle because it is not possible for people to remember things before we develope more language skills than a 15 mo. old has -- humans don't, by and large, remember anything prior to apporx. age 2. And he is certainly not saying we should beat our children with girdles now because when was the last time you saw a mother wearing a girdle?

And taking isolated quotes from a book to "prove" assertions is just as wrong as others taking isolated badly translated biblical verses to support their assertions. Don't hand "the other side" a victory by misstating facts. Use the truth.


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## ThreeBeans (Dec 2, 2006)

Since he takes a story of his wife whipping his fifteen month old's legs for...I can't remember...following her out on the porch? Going up the stairs? And holds it up as an example of excellent discipline, I'll stick with my original assertion.


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