# We finally have answers!!!



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

I did not go to the dr. But yesterday I took a hpt and it came back negative!!







The nausea has been gine for about 24 hours as well. So, 33 days of nausea are over!

I am not going to say that I am happy about my m/c. I'm still sad







I wonder if we would have had another boy or maybe a girl this time. I wonder what they would have looked like and what their little laugh would sound like and even what their little pooping face was









But I did learn from it and that is what matters. I learned that I love my baby more than I could have ever realized before... and I knew that was a whole lot!!
And I learned more than that but I have to go feed Tracy!....what a little piggy!!

I'm just glad it is over and now we can move on with life


----------



## XM (Apr 16, 2002)

I am glad you finally have some closure on this. And I am glad that you are feeling back to normal.

Have you read the article a few months back in Mothering about miscarriage? It had a piece called "Spirit Baby"... about the idea that a baby who was lost early will just keep coming back until it is finally born. I have actually heard this sentiment before from several ladies who suffered first trimester losses. So you may just get to see that 'poopy face' yet...

XM


----------



## Ms. Mom (Nov 18, 2001)

Closure is helpful. Now you can begin healing.

It sounds like the miscarriage was complete because you don't have any signs of complication. For that I'm glad.

Now, to your greif. Many people find it helpful to write a note to the baby that couldn't stay. You can say goodbye, talk about your dreams for him/her and tell baby how much you love him/her and wish he/she could be a living part of your life.

Your feelings of wondering who this baby would have been are so normal. I still wonder if all my babies were here today how my life would be?

Hold Tracey close tonight and enjoy the baby smells. Have a good cry if you need to.

Take the time you need to get through this. When you lose someone close you lose your past, when you lose a child, you lose your future with him.

Take care of yourself - you're in my thoughts. Please keep us updated on how you're doing.

Gently,

Jacque


----------



## JessicaS (Nov 18, 2001)

I am so sorry you have had to go through this. It must have been incredibly difficult to not understand what you were going through and have so many things be weird. WHile I know the answers were sad and heartbreaking, like others said it is good to have closure and finally know what is going on. The grief process is long and painful and it seems like this only delayed it for you.

I am so sorry.


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

You know.....I'm not sure I'm greiving or if I have or if I am. I think I did. I was so incredibly heartbroken the day and a couple after. But since then I've been looking for the positives and for anything that I could pull from the experience. I think what helped is that I talk about it. There are some I told because I would have told them I was pg....so why couldn't I tell them I'm not now.

My mom acts like I want to keep it a secret, and others act like I'm a basket case. I'm not either of those.....I think I have so much stress with everything else going on in my life that I don't have time to think about it.....


----------



## Ms. Mom (Nov 18, 2001)

You do have a lot going on now. This pregnancy/miscarriage came at a very difficult time.

Being in a state of numbness is normal after a loss. Remember, everyone deals with greif in their own way. As long as you're talking about it and accepting what's happend - your greiving just fine.

Emotions are a funny thing. They can come out of nowhere at times. They can also pass just as quickly.

Sending my heart and thoughts to you and your family.

Gently,

Jacque


----------

