# UNbelievable!



## calmom (Aug 11, 2002)

i'm just dumbfounded right now. i do children and family portrait photography and in january, i did pictures for a family that included a really cute 2 year old. the mom was REALLY excited about me using her daughter's pictures on my website. i don't guarantee any client that i will use their pictures but generally, i do.

to make it brief, we had some financial troubles and were selling two properties and trying to find a new place to rent so i never did get around to putting her dd's pictures on my website. she would email me occasionally, asking me about it. her emails were always really weird, almost obsessive.

she knew i was pregnant and in late june, she started sending me emails again: did you have your baby? did you ever put my dd's pictures on your website? i've been waiting. over and over. this was just weeks after Matthew's death and i couldn't bear to write it out to her and she was really pissing me off.

finally last week, she sent another one: did you ever have your baby??? so i briefly wrote back that my baby was stillborn just a few weeks ago and i'm not sure if i'll be doing photography anymore.

this was her exact response, this was IT!: if you do not do your pictures any more would you consuidered maybe selling you tutu skirts ? If so how much ?

how could she say this to me? no telling me she was sorry for my loss before asking if she could buy my inventory of skirts???? WTF? i know i should just tell her no, i won't be selling anything but i'm so MAD right now. i know that she's a client but i just don't care. i don't think i should have to be polite to someone like this. i've always been SO professional and polite to everyone, no matter how rude they are to me but i can't do it this time.







:


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## alternamama82 (May 28, 2009)

Oh Christie!!! That is HORRIBLE of her! How uncaring and inconsiderate. She definately sounds really strange... I wouldn't even answer her emails anymore if I were you. You don't need people like that in your life. I'm so sorry there are such cold people out there. I've dealt with a few over the past months, too. One being somebody who I worked with. It really, really hurt to think that people might expect me to "just get over" my daughter's death and move on with life. It's not that easy. ((huge hugs))


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## ShineliketheSon (Aug 20, 2008)

. I am so sorry people can be so cruel. I just can't understand how another mom could not have compassion for a mom who has lost their child. I just don't get it







: Some people just can't look past their own agenda to see someone elses heart. I hate this world some days.







again.


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## _betsy_ (Jun 29, 2004)

Wow, that's just flat-out rude.

So sorry for your loss, and for the way she treated you. It seems her social skills are quite lacking, from the previous bombardment of emails and odd feeling you got about her beforehand.


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## MI_Dawn (Jun 30, 2005)

OMG are you







kidding me!?!?!??!

Wow. I would have been livid. Just... wow. Wow.

You have every right to be







.

I wouldn't even respond to that. No way.

UNbelievable is right!


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## WaitingForKiddos (Nov 30, 2006)

I can hope that this woman was simply too scared to say that she was sorry you lost Matthew. Or maybe she is just rude and thoughtless. Either way, I am so very sorry you lost Matthew and I'm sorry you had to deal with someone so hurtful.


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## MFuglei (Nov 7, 2002)

Whoa.

There's a part of me that just has to believe she misread your e-mail or didn't read the whole thing or something.


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## LizaBear (Feb 1, 2003)

That is just UNreal !!


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## claireb (Apr 7, 2009)

That isn't rude. Not even in the same BALLPARK as rude.

That is *FLAT OUT COLD. Heartless.*

I am not usually a vindictive person, but if this woman _did_ read your whole email, and STILL responded like that, she does not deserve the blessing she has in her darling sweet little girl.

I am blown away. Holy









I am so sorry this happened to you. I would either not respond, or reply by saying "I am not even sure how to respond to such a strange and completely inappropriate request in the wake of my son's death. I hope, for your sake, you misread my response or somehow missed the piece of information that said that my baby was STILLBORN. Regardless, no, I will not be selling you my things."

God, I am just furious.









Claire


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## calmom (Aug 11, 2002)

yeah, i'm pretty sure she read the whole email. strangely enough, she's the same client that i had to postpone for weeks because of weeks of bleeding early in my pg with Matthew and she was really inappropriate then too.

ok, i have given myself permission to ignore her email. i thought about using claire's reply, because that's really good, but then i will live in fear of checking my email. lol


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## Jules09 (Feb 11, 2009)

Wow! I'm so sorry Christie, I don't understand how people like that can even exist. It really is unbelievable.









I would tend to just ignore her. She sounds crazy, and it's not like you'll be able to cure her craziness and convert her to a more normal, sensitive person. You don't owe her anything, and she's not worth your stress!


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## Vespertina (Sep 30, 2006)

Holy sh*t. She's insane. Wow. I'm so sorry, Christie. Unbelievable. I'm just shaking my head.

Good call on ignoring her. Uh. How annoying and cold of her.

Somewhat off topic, and I'm sorry if it's too early or sensitive for you right now. Have you considered donating your services to NILMDTS? I was asked about it months back. I think down the road it would be something I would consider.


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## Amy&4girls (Oct 30, 2006)

How very inappropriate!! I am so sorry you have been dealing w/this.


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## Vermillion (Mar 12, 2005)

Ugh... ew.

I'm sorry









I can relate though, to getting responses like this. Sounds like something my MIL would say.


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## lisa_nc (Jul 25, 2008)

Tell her "For you? One million dollars!" What a thoughtless person!


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## rsummer (Oct 27, 2006)

OMG... What a freakish, unexcusable example of poor mental craftsmanship. I would write back: never contact me again.


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## calmom (Aug 11, 2002)

thanks ladies. i have GOT to stop letting people get to me like this. let it go, i'm going to let it go. and lol, you guys are making me laugh too. 'poor mental craftsmanship' is right.

Britt, you're a photographer too? i have already decided to volunteer with NILMDTS for sure. i used to look at galleries that other photographers did for stillborn babies and wonder if i could do that. then after i lost Matthew, i KNEW that i had to do it. it's so strange to be on the other side now. i used to look at NILMDTS in a professional capacity and now it's so personal.


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## MandyB (Oct 9, 2006)

I couldn't read this and NOT respond. I cannot believe that lady! I agree that you shouldn't even give her the time of day with a response, but if you do decide to respond, Claire's repsonse seemed pretty perfect. Who cares if you piss her off at this point, right? I doubt you'll ever feel like doing a photo shoot of her family again after that email anyway.

Sorry she was so insensitive! She was definitely way out of line.


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## MI_Dawn (Jun 30, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *calmom* 
Britt, you're a photographer too? i have already decided to volunteer with NILMDTS for sure. i used to look at galleries that other photographers did for stillborn babies and wonder if i could do that. then after i lost Matthew, i KNEW that i had to do it. it's so strange to be on the other side now. i used to look at NILMDTS in a professional capacity and now it's so personal.

Me, too... once I can think about doing it without breaking down into 100 million little pieces...


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## Vespertina (Sep 30, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MI_Dawn* 
Me, too... once I can think about doing it without breaking down into 100 million little pieces...









Same here. I had heard about them awhile back and after having Duncan I thought I should really consider it in the future. I'm not a portrait photographer. My thing is emotive and people fine art, especially candid people photography. Now that I'm in ATL I thought I can start doing street photography. I love it.







I adore 35mm B&W, but I think for NILMDTS digital would be best.


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## SMR (Dec 21, 2004)

WOW.. that's all I can say.. are people THAT insane?!


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