# No urge to push during unmedicated labor: experiences? Causes?



## Jaimee (Jun 7, 2007)

With my first I had no urge to push whatsoever during my unmedicated labor. Sufficient to say the pushing stage was really difficult as I had to use shear will power to push with each contraction. It felt very unnatural and I experienced a lot of frustration that I'm sure also did not help things along. My daughter came out with a large scratch on her head. During my pregnancy, my tailbone dislocated twice and I had it pull back out by a MPT. My midwife hypothesized that my errant tailbone was probably not aligned properly during the birth. She said the urge to push is stimulated by the baby's head pressing on the muscle that is by the tailbone. If this is all true, it stands to reason that perhaps my dd's head was not able to push on this muscle if it was pulled off to the side and the scratch on her head could have been from the tailbone itself.

I'm due with my second in just a couple months and I'm starting to have some apprehension about pushing. Who else out there did not experience the urge to push during an unmedicated labor? Were you given any reason by your doctor/midwife, if so, what? Anyone not have the urge at first, but switch positions or do something else that caused the urge to be stimulated? Anyone not have the urge with one labor, but have it with another? If so, any idea what the difference was?

Thanks for your experiences!


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## blessed2bmommy (Apr 16, 2009)

I did not have the urge to push with DD. She was in the wrong position (is it posterior??). It was a very long, almost 3 hours, and pretty difficult. I'm guessing the reason is her position.

Sorry not much help!


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## CageFreeFamily (May 13, 2009)

My body definitely started pushing by itself with #2 and I helped a lot in the last few minutes. She came out with 3 pushes.
That being said... I plan to allow my body to do it by itself this time.

Check out: Don't Push the River, It Flows by Itself

I have several friends who didn't push because they didn't feel the urge, and a couple more who felt like pushing, but allowed their bodies to do it anyhow and feel grateful that they did.


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## sweet.p (Jul 31, 2009)

Read

http://www.spinningbabies.com/

I too think the baby could have been misaligned.


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## lunita1 (May 12, 2008)

No urge to push when? Just because you are fully dilated doesn't necessarily mean you have to push immediately. I've heard of births where the urge to push comes hours after the mom reaches full dilation. Maybe yours would have been one of those?

FWIW, my urge to push with my posterior baby maybe wasn't a physical urge to push as much as an absolute emotional need to end things and GET HER OUT. That was good enough for me. LOL. The back pain was excruciating.

Also, some women feel inhibited about pushing because the sensation can be so close to pooping, and they're self conscious about doing that in the presence of other people. I don't know if that could have played a role in what you felt/didn't feel?


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## Jaimee (Jun 7, 2007)

I think I pushed for about 45 minutes before dd came out because I was instructed to do so by my midwife. Basically it was like, oh you're 10 cm, time to push! I didn't really question it- I guess I thought that maybe the urge would come as I started to push. But it didn't. There was one glorious moment where I felt the urge and my body just bore down and it felt sooooo good. That happened only once and never again. I thought afterward how amazing it would have been if I had felt that way the whole time. I wonder what caused it that once right in the middle of everything, but nothing before it or after it.

Now that I'm once again thinking about birth, I am wondering if my midwife had let me wait if it would have come. I guess I'm questioning if she just wanted the baby out instead of letting my body do its thing. I definitely was not thinking about pooping (I had emptied myself all day long and I don't think anything was left). I was literally screaming as I pushed because of the intense, all out exertion. I couldn't hold my breath- I had to do something with my air, so it came out in a scream and my midwife encouraged it because it allowed me to keep pushing.

I read the link above about letting your body push the baby out with minimal interference. I thought it was interesting that Ina May was quoted because I'm reading her _Guide to Childbirth_ right now and there was a birth story in there that talked about a woman that had read about not pushing and didn't want to push. Ina May had to instruct her to push or her baby wasn't coming out. So I wonder, too, if the whole not pushing at all thing works for everyone? The idea is certainly appealing. I emailed the link to my midwife to see what she thought of it and/or if she has attended any births where no pushing was needed. And, perhaps this time around my midwife will allow me to wait and see if the urge arises (if it isn't already there).


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## bobandjess99 (Aug 1, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lunita1* 
No urge to push when? Just because you are fully dilated doesn't necessarily mean you have to push immediately. I've heard of births where the urge to push comes hours after the mom reaches full dilation. Maybe yours would have been one of those?

?

Yes, this. i would ask of any mother who says she "did not feel the urge to push" exactly what that means? You were laboring and laboring ...and then what? Did you get an internal to check for "dilation"? And you were told you were 10 cms and therefore could push? How long did you wait for the urge? 10 minutes? 30? 2 hours? 4?
With my first, I did not get the "urge" to push until about 6 HOURS after i was "fully dilated". I assume that had I tried to push right after I hit "10", I too would have had some serious issues with pushing.
That being said, once the urge hit...it HIT. The freight train analogy was apt, in about 5-6 contractions, literally right on top of each other, double-peaked, about 5-10 minutes total, dd just SHOT right out of me.
With ds, I believe we had some malpositioning, and it took a little bit longer move his head down to crowning...I made several tentative "pushing" tries during contractions, even though there was no "urge", (which was AWFUL, by the way, lol,) and then again, once his head came down, it was freight train time again...3-4 really awful pushes with the "urge" and he exploded out.


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## _betsy_ (Jun 29, 2004)

With my first, I had been induced (at 100% and 4 cms for 2-3 weeks leading up to being a whopping 3 days over due date, was bullied into being induced for no real reason) with Pitocin. I blamed lacking the urge to push on the Pit. DD1 was born 1 hour and 48 minutes after Pitocin was started/water was broken.

With my second, I was completely unmedicated. I had no real urge to push, but the nurse wanted me to change positions so they could better monitor the baby's heart rate and I told her to F off, I had to push. I never had the feeling I *thought* I would feel when I was getting "pushy," but that's what I said, and what I needed to do at that point, although it was NOT some overwhelming need to push like I'd read about. 2 pushing contractions later and DD2 was born - 1 hour and 8 minutes after my water broke, with the cord wrapped loosely around her neck twice. Midwife missed her birth altogether, and she was a whopping 4 minutes away.

Anyways, what I'm saying is, I didn't really feel what I thought I'd feel at that point, but it was still the urge to push. It just wasn't huge and knock-you-out, no way to stop yourself need to push NOW, at least for me.


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## camprunner (Oct 31, 2003)

I didn't feel the urge to push with my last child. The midwife didn't do an internal check (that I remember) but said she could tell by my noises that I was ready. I think I pushed for 10 minutes? I think she was ready to come out but my water never broke the whole time and I think this is why I never felt the urge. The bag was bulging and until it was broken, I was not able to push her out at all.


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## crunchy_mama (Oct 11, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *bobandjess99* 
Yes, this. i would ask of any mother who says she "did not feel the urge to push" exactly what that means? You were laboring and laboring ...and then what? Did you get an internal to check for "dilation"? And you were told you were 10 cms and therefore could push? How long did you wait for the urge? 10 minutes? 30? 2 hours? 4?
With my first, I did not get the "urge" to push until about 6 HOURS after i was "fully dilated". I assume that had I tried to push right after I hit "10", I too would have had some serious issues with pushing.
That being said, once the urge hit...it HIT. The freight train analogy was apt, in about 5-6 contractions, literally right on top of each other, double-peaked, about 5-10 minutes total, dd just SHOT right out of me.
With ds, I believe we had some malpositioning, and it took a little bit longer move his head down to crowning...I made several tentative "pushing" tries during contractions, even though there was no "urge", (which was AWFUL, by the way, lol,) and then again, once his head came down, it was freight train time again...3-4 really awful pushes with the "urge" and he exploded out.

That is my thought as well. I think the body sometimes needs to wait for whatever reason. My first I started pushing right at 10 because I thought I was supposed to, not because I had the urge(and i was certainly unmedicated). I wish in hindsight I would have used that time to just try to rest and let my body and baby get ready- I think I would have been a lot less wore out and had a lot less hemorrhoids!


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## sparkysgirl (Feb 29, 2008)

i had an hbac, no urge here either. the last hour of pushing it got better, but i had to push for several seconds before my body would take over, i wouldn't call it overwhelming either. your experience sounds so much like mine! My babe had a scratch too right where her little hand was! yup she had her hand by her face, and was born that way. this is why pushing was so hard for me and actually i have read that this is associated with a lack of pushing urge.


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## lifeguard (May 12, 2008)

I never had the urge to push with ds until I delivered the placenta & then I was shocked 'cause it literally could not have stopped it. I do believe I started pushing too soon - I just didn't realize that it takes some women some time before they are ready to push after 10cm. Next time I fully intend to wait until the urge comes over me 'cause wow was pushing horrible - like op said it was sheer willpower.


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## Marlet (Sep 9, 2004)

I've never had the urge to push. My MIL birthed 9 babies and never had an urge to push. I also don't feel the placenta detaching/coming down.

Some women don't feel the urge to push. I think it's doing us a disservice to think that every woman has that oh so undeniable urge that just overtakes you (note my sarcasm there). I waited for it with DD2 and I honestly believe that my labour was longer than need be as a result. I just don't feel that urge. Definitely wasn't an issue of starting to push too soon or being directed or a misaligned baby etc.


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## Sudonk (Nov 29, 2005)

With my second, I was fully dilated for at least 3 hours (could have been longer, since my only check was at 10 cm so who knows how long I had been there) and still had no urge to push. My membranes were intact and my baby was floating very high. It wasn't until my water finally broke and he came down that I think I felt my body do some pushing. But his heartrate dropped significantly when the water broke, so I just pushed him right out and don't really remember if there was an urge beyond me thinking, "That baby needs to be out now." He did have his hand next to his head, but thanks to my Hypnobabies relaxation skills, it only took me 6 minutes of pushing to get him out and he and I were completely unscathed (no bruising or scratches/tears on either of us.)


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## sweeetpea (Jun 14, 2006)

With my 2nd (hospital) birth, I dilated rapidly, and DS came barreling down my vagina all by himself, with no help from me at all. One or two "pushes" and he was out. Freaked out the nurses, who really wanted me to wait for the OB. HA!

With my 3rd (homebirth), I was probably completely dilated for two hours (no vaginal exams), and did not feel any urge to push at all. The contractions spaced out a bit, and I was just walking around the house, waiting for whatever happened next. When my body finally did start pushing, it was VERY intense, but I did not have to consciously do anything until he crowned.

Perhaps your body just needed that break between completing dilation and pushing out the baby?


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## Jaimee (Jun 7, 2007)

It seems like quite a few of your experiences have to do with the bag of waters. I guess it now warrants mentioning that my midwife artificially ruptured my membranes when I was at 8cm. Dd's heart rate was a bit elevated and I had the choice between breaking my water or transferring to the hospital for fetal monitoring. Of course, I chose to have my water broken. Dd's heart rate dropped into the normal range and no meconium was present. But those contractions came on hard and strong after that. I also did a hypnosis program (HypBirth), which had been working beautifully for me up until that point. After my water was broken I lost focus and things just started to HURT! I wonder if perhaps dd got a bit misaligned because of the early rupture of membranes- leading to no urge to push. My midwife this time (we are in a different state and have a different midwife!) said she rarely sees a reason to break a woman's water and sees benefits in pushing the baby out still in the sac. So maybe this philosophy will help as well!

I would still love to hear more experiences, but I'm so grateful for all the stories posters have shared so far. I'm really excited to talk to my midwife about all this and hopefully get some reassurance that at least I will be more in control of my labor than last time.


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## AirMiami (Feb 3, 2009)

I did not have the urge to push at first and I believe this was due to my daughter's head being sideways and not face down. Once my midwife took her by the ear and turned her face down, I started feeling the urge to push. I too pushed for 3 hours, and it was very scary because by the time I felt the urge to push, I was extremely exhausted from my futile hour and a half of pushing with her head in the wrong position.

Huh, going back over everything, my water didn't break until after my midwife turned her head and I didn't feel the urge until after all of that happening. I think I'll just try to wait and see what happens next time, instead of trying to get the baby out just because I was at 10 cm. I was a little impatient and excited to meet my baby I guess.


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## pjs (Mar 30, 2005)

With my first 3 I undeniably had the urge to push. With #4 (1 week old) I didn't have the physical urge to push, but emotionally I needed to get him out and have the birth be over! In hindsight, I wish I had waited a bit. And interestingly enough #4 was born in the caul (bag of waters intact) so perhaps water breaking does have something to do with the urge.


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## Gena 22 (Jul 3, 2008)

No urge to push for me either!

Here's why: twin pregnancy (my first), I induced with castor oil after a couple of days of pre-labor that didn't seem to be going anywhere. Not much caster oil, and I stopped when I broke Baby A's water with a castor oil spasm. Labor did start, but not well. Lots of puking, little progress. I got dehydrated, my midwife went on vacation (as planned, one reason I induced.)

Her backup MW came in and gave me an IV. I went straight from 5cm to fully dialated. But almost no contractions left at this point. Back-up MW, with LOTS of twin homebirth experience took what I told her about the twin's position and came up with a theory. She thought the girls were facing each other, like they were hugging (that was the case in the u/s two weeks earlier.) The chin of one baby was blocking the shoulder of the baby trying to descend. She had an assistant hold one side of my belly up (it was as if the twins were shrink wrapped inside).

That change in position made ALL the difference. I pushed for a short amount of time, maybe 20 minutes. It was all easy, all directed by the MW, and I had a perfect baby and no tears! Second baby came out after I rested for an hour. Again, no pushing urge, but easy pushing.

OK, so this is different from your situation, but the summary is positioning makes a huge difference!


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## CallMeMommy (Jun 15, 2005)

I never had an urge to push, and I actually never actively pushed - the fetal ejection reflex did it all. I never had an internal so I don't know how long I was sitting at 10 cm or anything like that.


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## BanditaMamacita (Aug 17, 2009)

With my first, the urge to push didn't feel much like I had imagined. I guess it was an urge to push, bc I had been breathing through my last few contractions to avoid holding my breath and bearing down. It felt natural to bear down with the contractions, but it just didn't feel like the undeniable urge to push that I had envisioned. As dd got lower, it become more a crystal clear urge to push. Maybe there's a difference? I don't know.

With my second, I went through a wildly rapid transition and suddenly there was a head in my vagina and it would have been impossible to resist the urge to push... He was coming whether I pushed or not, but resisting it felt TERRIBLE. I assume that was more of a FER type experience tho... He came out in just one push once I stopped resisting.


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## Teensy (Feb 22, 2002)

I never felt the urge to push with DS #1. I had been in labor (the kind with painful, you can't sleep through them, contractions) for over 36 hours. I pushed for over 2 1/2 hours before he was finally born, but never felt the urge to push (definitely wanted to be done with that hell called labor at that point though!).

Now DD, on the other hand, I felt the urge to push, the nurse told me to wait while she ran down the hall to get my OB, but there is NO WAY I could have not pushed. I definitely understood at that point what an "urge to push" felt like. DD was born in just a few pushes.


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## Devaskyla (Oct 5, 2003)

My "urge to push" is that it hurts less than not pushing. That's the closest I've ever come to an "urge"


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## rozziemama (May 8, 2008)

*Jaime*: I haven't posted in a while and I was actually looking for something else on the site but saw your question and had to reply. I gave birth to DS (my first) one year ago (11-3-09) and with it being his birthday was flooded with memories of my labor with him.
It was all natural, as I'd planned.
I got to the hospital and was 8 cm dilated and thought "wow - this is going to be fast!" but then ended up pushing for (NO JOKE) 5 HOURS.

As I reflect on my experience now, I really do not recall ANY urge to push. He was head down and i had no back labor or anything so I think he was in the correct position, according to my midwife at least - but I really didn't feel the urge to push. I think that's why it ended up lasting so long.
I know I was so lucky that the hospital allowed me to push as long as I did. The reason for it was that his heartbeat never faltered - strong the whole time, and it looked like I was making "progress" - but I really wish that I'd felt empowered enough to say that I wanted to wait.
I never EVER felt the urge to push.
Next time, if there is one, I will insist on waiting.


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## flapjack (Mar 15, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Jaimee* 
It seems like quite a few of your experiences have to do with the bag of waters. I guess it now warrants mentioning that my midwife artificially ruptured my membranes when I was at 8cm. Dd's heart rate was a bit elevated and I had the choice between breaking my water or transferring to the hospital for fetal monitoring. Of course, I chose to have my water broken. Dd's heart rate dropped into the normal range and no meconium was present. But those contractions came on hard and strong after that. I also did a hypnosis program (HypBirth), which had been working beautifully for me up until that point. After my water was broken I lost focus and things just started to HURT! I wonder if perhaps dd got a bit misaligned because of the early rupture of membranes- leading to no urge to push. My midwife this time (we are in a different state and have a different midwife!) said she rarely sees a reason to break a woman's water and sees benefits in pushing the baby out still in the sac. So maybe this philosophy will help as well!

I would still love to hear more experiences, but I'm so grateful for all the stories posters have shared so far. I'm really excited to talk to my midwife about all this and hopefully get some reassurance that at least I will be more in control of my labor than last time.

In retrospect, would you still say "of course" you chose to have your waters broken? If you're in that situation again, would you make the same choice?

My DS2's waters were broken during an internal when I was roughly 8cm dilated. Labour stalled, and within 2 hours I was getting strong encouragement to get mobile, to sit on the toilet, think about pushing (I had the same midwives as with my first birth, where I sat on the toilet thinking about poo for 2 hours then had a baby. Neither of us had forgotten.) I do not know why or where the timeline came in, but I felt that there was one, and I wish that I had identified her concerns and transferred to hospital. As things turned out, he was born in military position, presenting with both shoulders at once, got stuck for just under two minutes with a turtling head, and then after birth I haemorrhaged. Continual monitoring would have given us the peace of mind to wait things out, and I do believe that if we'd waited, he'd have changed position just enough to get his shoulders through more easily.

All my others have been homebirths, but there are occasions when I've second-guessed the decision not to transfer with DS2.


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## tessie (Dec 6, 2006)

I felt a bit pushy at around five cm (I think) but not at 10cm. I said I couldn't go on, the midwife had a quick look and told me she could see the head. I only consciously pushed a couple of times but had no urge to do so. Something must have been happening though as she was out in 8 mins.


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## Serenyd (Jan 6, 2008)

No urge to push w/ my first, but had an epidural. 2nd baby, no urge to push, baby's head was buldging at my perineum, tried pushing but felt like he was stuck, got on hands and knees at the suggestion of my doula, and easily pushed him out with a single push/contraction, but never felt "the urge." This baby, felt like I had to have a BM, went and sat on the toilet, and tried to go, and baby moved down and I continued to feel pushy and pushed her down and out easily. I think #2 may have been malpositioned, possibly. Also had primarily back labor w/ him.

eta: This last baby is the closest I have had to having an "urge" but nothing overwhelming - I was still choosing to push, it wasn't my body forcing it.


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## StrawberryFields (Apr 6, 2005)

Well, I sort of did not have an urge to push with my ds. My midwife told me that I was ready to push and since it was my first I was like, ok, well, I guess... I didn't have anything to base it on. So I pushed and pushed but it felt weird, I felt like it was really a lot of work and I was kind of confused. I ended up transferring to the hospital. In the car on the way there the real urge to push hit and then it was a completely different experience!! So in hindsight I realized that I was coached into pushing before I was ready.


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## emaye_to_2 (Jan 16, 2008)

I did not have any urge to push with my first DS. I was in labor eight hours when my water broke. We went to the birth center and then I spent another five hours in the tub with incredibly painful contractions and back labor. No one ever checked me. Finally someone checked me and said it was time to push. I pushed on a birth stool very awkwardly for 2.5 hours. I didn't feel like I was making progress. My son was born in the water and ended up having complications.

My second birth was very different (3 hours total!) but I still didn't have the "urge" to push. This time, when we made it to the birth center, midwife checked and said I was complete and to try pushing. I thought OK I'll just give pushing a little try to see what happens. And baby flew out!


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