# OK, shared bath water.... is that gross?



## jes h (Jan 25, 2011)

So, maybe this is icky... what are your thoughts?

We had 2 new kidos move in; a 5 year old girl and 3 year old boy - siblings. (We have one 3 year old boy of our own, so we are very new to having multiple kids in the house.)

On bath night, I asked the 5 year old how they 'normally' do baths; I want to keep what they are used to as much as possible, and she said they always took baths together. During their bath, it is obvious that the 5 year old is ready to have her own bath; she wants to stretch and play and that leaves no room for 3 year old. I also have a 3 year old son. So, our routine the first bath night was to run 2 baths; one for the siblings and one for DS.

So, 5 year old wants to have her own bath; which I think is totally acceptable, but I am not that keen on the idea of running 3 baths, both for the time it adds, and for the water and heat it uses.

SO; here's the question; is it acceptable for the 5 year old to bath, then for her to jump out and let little brother in? I mean, they were sharing bath water when taking a bath together, so theoretically, this isn't all that different. I wouldn't question it, but for some reason I get an icky feeling about having my son share the same water and would want to run fresh water for him, so I worry that either the idea is icky, or I am setting separate standards for my FC than my son, which I don't want to do, either. How do houses with multiple kids handle baths????

Now, my son does have a immunity disorder which we just discovered, and I'd like to say that my icky feeling has to do with protecting him from germs... but...

So,

what do you think?????


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## StephandOwen (Jun 22, 2004)

Before I got done reading the whole post I was thinking to myself "would you let your ds bathe in the same water one of the other kids bathed in?" and then you answered it. So, I think you have your answer. If you wouldn't do it for your son, don't do it for the other kids either. While they are *just* 3 right now I think at some point the other boy would question why he gets "dirty" bath water every time but your son gets clean bath water.

I say suck it up and run a 3rd bath so all the kids get their own. The tub doesn't have to be full for kids that young, ya know?


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## purslaine (Feb 20, 2006)

I would run three separate baths.

Honestly, though, I do not think most kids need a bath nightly, so I would just alternate nights so it cut down on water usage and was not an overwhelming amount of work for you.


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## jes h (Jan 25, 2011)

Don't know why I didn't think of alternating bath nights - we only do baths 2 days a week... though our evenings get busy toward the end of the week...

Think I'll just do 3 fresh baths; the new little guy doesn't seem to relish his bath the way his sister and my son do, so he doesn't need a deep/long bath.

At the moment, I can't say I am a big fan of the idea of an hour and a half of baths (between getting in, out, draining, filling, etc.) but I am sure we'll get used to it. Its not like the extra drain/fill adds that much; the bulk is just the extra time of the extra bath.

DS needs a very set routine, so we are pretty ridged; I guess I am just as bad as he is about changing my routine!

I know some people do baths as part of their nightly bedtime routine; I wouldn't be able to stand that with just my one (hence our twice a week schedule).

How do really large families do baths??? I guess as first kids get older they can handle themselves even with other little ones...


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## APToddlerMama (Oct 5, 2009)

I don't think there is anything wrong with siblings sharing bath water and I would change bath water for non-siblings. I was bathed with cousins and very close friends as a kid and think that is gross. I wouldn't do that with my kids but I was fine bathing with siblings and am ok bathing my kids together.


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## jes h (Jan 25, 2011)

Yea, funny you said that, because I just sat down and signed on again to add that I would not let my son share a bath with FCs, or have FC's who weren't siblings bath together, and would not consider this at all in that situation either. I don't think I would feel as icky if my son were bathing or sharing bath water with his sibling, so it is more a question of siblings sharing baths/bath water, than a biological/foster kid issue.


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## 34me (Oct 2, 2006)

If little FC doesn't care about the baths, why can't he shower? So on One day FC#1 bathes and FC#2 showers. The next night (on his usual night so it doesn't change his routine) ds#1 bathes. Then the same thing happens on the other 2 nights. My middle guy always took a shower to get clean. the only time he took a bath was for fun.


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## akat (Jun 30, 2009)

My kids love bubble baths and like to play with fun soaps, so our habit is to rinse them quickly in the shower at the end of most baths, to rinse the soap away. I think it would be reasonable for any or all of the kids to share bath water if you quickly soaped and rinsed them with the shower at the end.


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## Peony (Nov 27, 2003)

My kids share bath water and I have 4 kids. Baths are staggered over days. It is rare that everyone needs a bath on the same day because I work hard to avoid that! We do every other day baths or showers for the big kids and the ones 3 and under get baths about twice a week. There is no way I'd run 3 baths in the same night. I will pop a kid in the shower though, run one bath for 2 kids and then run another shower for another older kid later on. When we do nights like that is feels like I spend an hour bathing kids so I try to get it so 1-2 get a bath every night, spread it out a little.


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## nstewart (Nov 6, 2010)

Just out of curiousity, do those who wouldn't allow non-siblings to share a bath allow their children to swim with other children in little splash pools? This is the same as sharing a bath IMO and not something I'd have a problem with. Is it the nudity that is icky (which I think depends on age) or is it the sharing the water? I let DS bath with his cousin and I he had a bath with a friend's boy of the same age (19mos) last time we were visiting (because it was fun for them and convenient for us). It isn't icky, IMO, it's just water and soap.


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## purslaine (Feb 20, 2006)

Pools are pretty large and chlorinated Bathtubs are small and the child is grungy. To me there is a difference - the dirt to water ratio.


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## nstewart (Nov 6, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *kathymuggle*
> 
> Pools are pretty large and chlorinated Bathtubs are small and the child is grungy. To me there is a difference - the dirt to water ratio.


I see what you're getting at. I meant those little splash pools that you can pick up at Toys R Us or Canadian Tire and that you fill with a garden hose. Country girl here, so maybe that's partly why it doesn't bug me. I've swam in dug outs and bathed in the lake with all the fish poo, etc. so 2 (likely relatively "clean") children just doesn't seem "dirty" to me. Open cuts or sores, or if there is an issue with the immune system as in OPs DC case would be different, mind you.


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## Friday13th (Jun 13, 2006)

Hm, I'll be the voice of dissent and say I'd bathe the two little boys togther and probably not think twice. But I let my kids bathe with their cousins and wouldn't have an issue with him bathing with a close friend either. Of course there are no health issues so that might change my opinion.


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## Mandy613 (Mar 11, 2012)

both my kids share the same tub water every night. We have a 2 year old boy and an almost 6 month old girl. Once our daughter is old enough to sit up on her own Id like to get both kids done at the same time... BUT once my son gets a bit older I do NOT want them sharing a tub. I dont need the kids to be checking each others parts out... it creeps me out. lol

I say let the older girl have her tub time alone (15 mins) Then have both boys of the same age have their bath together.. All the kids are now on your hygiene schedule, so no kid is dirtier then the other. Besides back in the day entire families shared the same bath water, they just kept adding more hot water from the stove to keep it warm.

Regardless of immune issues, soap in the tub kills germs, and if kids get sick in the house most of the time regardless how much you try ALL the kids are going to be sick lol.

So theres my thought. you could even just re heat up the bath water for all... OR just empty half and refill with fresh for the boys.... who needs a killer water/heater bill anyways lol the kids dont care. i figure if they can share a back yard kiddie pool, whats the issue? 

best of luck!


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## jes h (Jan 25, 2011)

Thanks for all the replies!

Practically, for now, this ends up being a mute point; the siblings are on their way to their auntie's house tomorrow!

I have lost that 'icky' feeling... I mean, having them share the water is the same as bathing together. Probably, I would switch them around, having had more time to know them; the 3 year old doesn't really do much to get dirty, whereas the 5 year old and my son played in dirt pile for a half hour yesterday, so it would probably be more practical to let the 3 year old bath, then add hot water and let his sister go to town.

On the pool note; this is EXACTLY why I don't do hot tubs with friends. It feels way to much like taking a bath with a bunch of other, sweaty adults. There is a natural hot springs about 60 miles away from our house where people camp, then go to the hot springs. It isn't like a spring where the water is flowing, but a pool where the hot spring has been diverted. To me, it is just taking a bath with 30 other adults who have been camping for who-knows-how-long and I have no idea if they have used the pay showers... ewe.


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## flightgoddess (Mar 4, 2009)

Yes. TOtally fine. When I slept over at one friend's house, us (the girls) would get dibs on the bath first, then her little brothers would get their turn. You don't need to change water unless there is mud, or somebody pees.


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## Alphaghetti (May 26, 2005)

My kids use the same bath water all the time, unless they're really dirty!


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## BrascosPrincess (Jul 14, 2011)

i put my three kids in the bath at the same time, but my girls are 2 1/2, 1 1/2 and my son is 5 months so they fit better than yours would, i wish i could be of more help


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