# 11 month old refuses to go to sleep any time before nine



## vermontgirl (Aug 15, 2006)

harvest has been energetic until nine to nine thirty at night and it doesn't matter what his nap schedule has been. he just refuses to fall asleep and it is discouraging to me because i would like him to be asleep around eight. is this an abnormal bed time for a baby? if so what are some tips for me to get him to fall asleep earlier.

ps
please don't suggest bath time, lavender oil, or soothing lullabyes.


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## Marlet (Sep 9, 2004)

I don't think it's an abnormal bedtime at all. That said, my 2 year old has always gone to bed when we do: 10-10:30. Granted when she was younger she was asleep maybe a tad before but she's never had a different bedtime than us.Some babies are just night owls.









Hope you find something that works for you!

ETA: She has started going to bed earlier around 9:30. If she needs the extra sleep (like growth spurt or illness related) she'll go to bed earlier on her own accord. She doesn't nap either.


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## Snowdrift (Oct 15, 2005)

I gave up. Ellie is a night owl. Now that she doesn't nap in the afternoon regularly she'll often have a late nap around 6-8 but is always up between 8-10. It's just her most awake/alert time of day. We just learned to fit our schedules to be in sync with hers.


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## scheelimama (Aug 2, 2003)

When my kids were that age, I don't remember them going to bed much sooner than that. I think it's pretty normal. For the past year or so (since they were 1.5 and 3 yrs old) we've been pretty consistently putting them to bed around 8 p.m., but it was always 9 or 10 before that. That's just what worked best for their bodies.

Is he still taking 2 naps a day? Perhaps when he cuts back to just one nap a day, he'll start going to bed a bit earlier. And perhaps, he won't.


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## delphiniumpansy (Mar 1, 2007)

What matters is how much sleep he gets a day and the quality of it. So what if he is a night owl? You can get him on an earlier bedtime when he is older.


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## Marlet (Sep 9, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *yellowpansy* 
What matters is how much sleep he gets a day and the quality of it. So what if he is a night owl? You can get him on an earlier bedtime when he is older.

Very true! DD doesn't nap (and hasn't for some time) but you know what? She sleeps for 12 hours (more if she goes down sooner) so I'm not worried about it.


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## omniavincitamor (Jun 6, 2007)

Nine isn't awful. Embrace it!


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## Herausgeber (Apr 29, 2006)

Ummm, my DD doesn't go to bed before 10 or 11.


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## alegna (Jan 14, 2003)

My dd never goes to sleep before midnight, so 9 sounds fabulous









-Angela


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## ElliesMomma (Sep 21, 2006)

my 13 month old usually goes around 8:30 pm or 9:00 pm. last night i tried to get her to bed early, but she wouldn't go until 10:00 pm. consequent to the later bedtime, this morning, she wanted to sleep past 8:00 am (but we have to get up because DH needs a ride to the train). usually she's up around 7:00 am.

long and short: if you want or need an earlier bedtime, i would suggest waking her up a little earlier in the morning than she would ordinarily on her own. i know our neighbors, who get their baby up at 6:00 am or earlier for daycare/work, they have their baby to sleep by 7:00 p.m.!


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## mama in the forest (Apr 17, 2006)

My 11 month old doesn't go to sleep till sometime between 10 - 11:30PM. I love my little night owl!


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## Jenlaana (Oct 28, 2005)

I really think 9pm is average. My DD, at 20 mos, goes to bed between 7pm and 9:30pm depending on our day. If you're against CIO, which I will assume since you're here, then you have to read your babe's cues. You can try adjusting wake/nap times, but thats about all I can imagine.


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## BetsyS (Nov 8, 2004)

I am usually in bed by 9:30 or 10:00. I'm praying that I don't ever get a baby that stays up until midnight.







: I think I would go insane.

My 9.5 month old goes to bed by 7, so I don't think an 8:00 bedtime is out of line. Of course, 6 am is sleeping late (really late...he's usually up at 5:15), so that's your trade-off.

edited to add: this is what time he's gone to bed since like 8 weeks old. It's just him. We didn't do anything special to get an early sleeper. We do wake him at 5:45 if he's not already awake, though, (even though that's rare), cause he deserves to be able to spend time with his daddy in the morning.


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## beana's mommy (Feb 16, 2006)

I don't know if it's normal or not, nor do I care! LOL My dd has been going to bed between 10-11 since she started having a somewhat schedule she followed. We love it. Daddy gets all that extra time after work with her, and she sleeps in more which makes me happy in the morning!

Sorry, I don't have any advice to make it earlier!


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## alegna (Jan 14, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *BetsyS* 
I am usually in bed by 9:30 or 10:00. I'm praying that I don't ever get a baby that stays up until midnight.







: I think I would go insane.

My 9.5 month old goes to bed by 7, so I don't think an 8:00 bedtime is out of line. Of course, 6 am is sleeping late (really late...he's usually up at 5:15), so that's your trade-off.

edited to add: this is what time he's gone to bed since like 8 weeks old. It's just him. We didn't do anything special to get an early sleeper. We do wake him at 5:45 if he's not already awake, though, (even though that's rare), cause he deserves to be able to spend time with his daddy in the morning.









and I'd jump off a cliff if she got up at 5:45, never MIND 5:15. Ack.

-Angela


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## hipumpkins (Jul 25, 2003)

I definetly prefer the " sleeping in" instead of "going to bed earlier" routine.
Until my DD gave up napping just after turning 2 she was up later in the night..probably well after 9. Once she gave up naps she was asleep by 7:30-8 every night and she slept for 13 hours. It was awesome.


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## vermontgirl (Aug 15, 2006)

Well, I forgot to add that the frustrating thing is that he acts exausted for about 2 hours before actually falling asleep. He rubs his eyes, fusses, clings to me, nurses a lot...ect but doesnt actually go night night. It is SO hard for me. This evening he hemmed and hawed from 7-10. He fell asleep around 10ish. It is really really frustrating.


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## ScarletBegonias (Aug 24, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *vermontgirl* 
Well, I forgot to add that the frustrating thing is that he acts exausted for about 2 hours before actually falling asleep. He rubs his eyes, fusses, clings to me, nurses a lot...ect but doesnt actually go night night. It is SO hard for me. This evening he hemmed and hawed from 7-10. He fell asleep around 10ish. It is really really frustrating.

my dd is almost 17 mo. she is most definitiely a night owl! 11-midnight is her usual bedtime. it's been this way from day 1. she also has a hard hour or two before she finally conks out. what works for us is to put her in the ergo on my BACK a walk around for a little while. sometimes she's asleep in 10 minutes, sometimes 1/2 an hour.


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## VeganMamaRed (Jun 7, 2007)

I really think that all babies and kids have an inner clock that is built into them. You may not ever get him to sleep before 9, he may just be a night owl. Some of my best times have been spent with my two little ones late at night, when the phone isn't ringing and nothing is going on. My advice would be to just enjoy it as best you can and enjoy sleeping in a little in the morning when most of your friends are rolling out of bed with their babies at 5:30.







Mary


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## MAMom (Mar 24, 2005)

At that age my DS went to sleep at 11pm and woke around 10am. Now at 4yo (and DD 16 months), bed is 9 or 9:30, up at 8ish.


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## guestmama9911 (May 24, 2005)

Hahahahaha! My 19 month old has been staying up until 4:00 am the last week because his dad started a paper route and he wants to stay up until Daddy leaves. Oh, boy, do I miss the 12:00 midnight bedtime.

I recommend a book I am reading now called The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers. She's an AP mama, so her ideas are gentle. I'm using it to help wean DS from night-nursing because I'm pregnant and need to get ready for the next child. She has TONS of ideas for helping little ones develop a routine and overcome problems.

Good luck, fellow sleepy mama!


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## daycaremama (Jun 7, 2007)

I have read a lot about sleep thanks to my 2 year old. Most books say that an ideal bedtime is between 7-8. My son is just doing that now. I stressed so much about sleep with my first. Now with my 4 month old, I realized I can only do so much and I'm going with the flow. She appears to be ready for bed at 7 but never goes to bed until 9:30-10. I have a great pediatrician who is supportive of AP. When it comes to sleep he says, "You can lead a horse to water...".

Just when you think you can't stand what they're doing any longer they change.

Good luck!


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## GracesMama (Oct 24, 2006)

My 22 month old DD does the same thing. She seems tired by 7:30 but absolutely refuses to fall asleep until 9:00 or 9:30. The good news is that she doesn't get up until 9:00 in the morning (she still wakes several times a night to nurse though).

I agree, it is frustrating, but I've just adjusted my schedule so that I stay up later to get things done and spend time with DH after she falls asleep and then sleep in later.


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## Charming Opal (Jan 15, 2007)

I have a 10 month old daughter and just recently she has been staying up til 10pm. At first I thought it was due to teething discomfort, but now it seems like a routine pattern. Try to rest as much as you can in the interim, could someone watch over your babe while you nap? I'll have dh watch over mine while I power nap for 20 min. and it really helps to restore me.


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## silverkts (Jan 2, 2007)

Have you tried moving his bedtime up by 10-15mins at a time?
I had success doing that with DD. She was going to bed around 11-12 but was obviously tired. I started nursing her down at 10:45, and when she becamed accustomed to that (a few days) I started at 10:30, then around 10 etc. Within a couple of weeks I had her sleeping between 8-9. It took alot of patience on my end. Often i would take her to bed and she's want to play and jump around but I'd keep the lights dim and the room quiet and keep offering to nurse her and/or pat her back until she slept and it would take forever, but now she's back on her natural rhythm, which is much easier on me. Good luck!


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## vermontgirl (Aug 15, 2006)

He is getting harder and harder to get to sleep for naps AND bedtime. I think it will be fine but it is just frustrating in the meantime. I will just have to let him hang out and do his thing. He will sleep eventually-I just have to try try try to be patient! GOSH it is a lot of work to be a mama. If only people knew...


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## Carma (Feb 10, 2006)

Our 21 month also sleeps at around 9-9:30 pm. However what is interesting when we went to Europe (6 hours time difference), she quickly adjusted to also sleeping at 9-9:30 pm overthere. So not sure how hardwired this sleep time is, if we are also somehow influencing her.

Carma


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## WillyMom (May 1, 2007)

Fellow VTer here









My DS has been staying up a bit later lately (8pm instead of 7pm), and his wake up time has been early. I think it may be due to the seasons and it being light longer.


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