# My baby won't sleep with me!



## splash (Aug 30, 2005)

Okay, not a big deal, but my feelings are hurt!

Charlie used to sleep with me, and I would hand him to Jean when he woke up to nurse, and then when he was asleep, she would give him back. Then when he was able, he would roll over to her, nurse for awhile, and roll back. Occasionally he would nurse off of me as well but not often anymore.

Well, now he starts sleeping with me, then rolls to her to eat, and never comes back! If she hands him back to me, he cries!

She doesn't really like sleeping with him all night (she likes him in the bed, just not pressed up against her. He doesn't even nurse all night, just wants to be WITH HER) and I want him back!

Is there any way I can get him to realize I'm fun to cuddle with as well? Or should I just ignore it and let him sleep where he wants to sleep?

The whole cosleeping thing was MY idea! He's only there because of me, and now he only wants to sleep with her! Little meanie.


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## momtoTnT (Dec 15, 2004)

I'm sorry!







I have no advice to give....

Hopefully/maybe it's just a phase! I know my ds was/is like that from time to time too - only wanting one of us for everything. It's hard when you're not the 'favorite'!


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## twins10705 (Feb 10, 2006)

awww..that sucks...maybe it could be because he recognizes her scent as his sole milk source? I don't know if Jean expresses any extra milk for a freezer stash or anything -- but if she does, you might try nursing him before bed using an SNS. I bought the "short term use" one that I have for $5 new on ebay -- it can be reused just fine as long as it's washed well after of course. Maybe then he would come to recognize your scent as his milk mama too and seek out more cuddles from you at night. HTH

--Amanda


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## Astoria (May 27, 2004)

My first ds preferred my husband from day 1 and still does at almost 5 and *I* nursed him for 2 years! Has never once woken up at night and called "mommy" -- its "daddy" every time. There's no reasoning with um, these little ones, but as long as their getting lots of love and comfort, they'll flourish. And us, well we'll get over it too.









Seriously, sometimes its a phase, sometimes its not. Attachment is a mysterious thing. But we *know* the attachment for us is there, even if the expressed preference is for the other parent.

Astoria


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## Diane B (Mar 15, 2004)

We currently have a situation where my partner is more the nighttime preferred parent, I'm more the daytime preferred parent. We joke about it, and try not to lay any additional meaning on top of it. We have no idea why my daughter prefers to sleep with one mama and not the other, but there it is. She loves us both, and one thing I'm learning - everything changes! Next month, she might want to sleep with the cat, for all we know.


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## Slabobbin (Jan 29, 2004)

I like the idea of pumped milk and a SNS system. How would you and/or your partner feel about that? I would imagine that if he has nursed off of you before that it woudln't be an issue.







Just getting her to pump the milk is all.


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## 2Sweeties1Angel (Jan 30, 2006)

DD used to only want me, but now she only wants DH at night when he's home. Maybe it's just a phase.

I used to know these two women who each had a child--not at the same time but a few years apart. Each of the girl's only wanted her biological mom at night as a baby, but they outgrew it by around 10 mos or so and started wanting both moms.


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## splash (Aug 30, 2005)

I don't think it's the milk. They have both spent a bit of time in the hospital recently (her for four days, then home for 4 days before he went in for five days, when I spent the night with him and her the day) and it seems that it started about the time he got home from the hospital last time (she has previously spent the nights when he was hospitalized, but this time she was getting over being sick herself and needed the rest) so maybe he is just making up for lost time or making sure she's really not gonna disappear again.


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## InDaPhunk (Jun 24, 2005)

Thou whom dost hold the nee nee milkith, doth hold the keys to the Kingdom.

Heh.


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## pjlioness (Nov 29, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *splash*
...so maybe he is just making up for lost time or making sure she's really not gonna disappear again.

That may well be it.

Oh, and congrats on the SKIN!!!! Yippee!


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## Vicitoria (Dec 17, 2004)

It could be a phase. DS was very daddy oriented but when we moved we were together all the time going through a stressful time so ds clug right to me. DH was devistated! It varies from night to night now though. After 19 months it's like me and ds FINALLY bonded but he and dh just took off from the start. We've formula fed since day 4 so I don't think milk has a lot to do with it. One issue I have found is when ds really misses dh because he's been working a lot he will cling right on to him for dear life all night long.


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