# marital pet peeve ... vent



## mommysarah5 (Jun 22, 2009)

Since we have been married I have told my husband he needs to turn his shirts in inside right before putting them in the hamper. Over the years I fixed his shirts for him as he continued not to do so. Not anymore. It grates my nerves. I should be glad he no longer leaves things in his pockets at least I guess.

I just do not see turning shirts the "right way" as part of doing the laundry. And since I am the only one who does the laundry (and the only one who cleans the house, and the only one who changes diapers, gets up with the baby at night, does activities with the kids, goes grocery shopping... you get the picture.) I feel I can make the rules about how the laundry is done. And to further the effect, He goes through more clothes in a week then me and all our kids put together.

So, that's it. I'm folding them inside out from now on. It would take him an extra 5 seconds of his day to do it before he puts it in the hamper. But not only does it take me that long for each shirt when I do the laundry, it also interrupts my laundry folding grove. And the reality is, I already have a lot more to do in a day then he does. He sits behind a computer at work all day, usually surfing the web because the phone barely rings, then comes home and watches TV on his computer. So one way or another, he is going to turn his shirts inside right whether its before I wash them or after they've already been washed and folded, that is up to him.

Along the same lines he will not put the whites and colors in separate baskets, another task that would take 2 seconds more out of his day, but makes doing the laundry take entirely longer then it has to for me, but I guess I'll save that battle for another day









So I'm no suzy homemaker, but I do enough in a day as it is, and I draw the line and shirt turning. I feel better now lol


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## JamieCatheryn (Dec 31, 2005)

Hehe I can not picture myself trying to get my husband to remember to do something like that, turning everything right side out is just part of folding I thought.

I've got one though, my DH gets up in the middle of the night for a snack- cereal, yogurt, ice cream, popsicle, whatever. Often, he finishes off a container, and puts it back/leaves it in the fridge or pantry! I see it and think we still have some, plan to have it, don't buy more, then go to get it out and find nothing is left!


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## monkeybars (Jul 3, 2004)

My husband does this too (and leaves stuff in his pockets). It's totally annoying, and long ago I stopped turning them inside out. I just fold or hang inside out and he can deal with it when he's dressing. To his credit, he's never complained about this


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## fromtheheart (Jun 16, 2008)

I just finally after 4.5 years got my DH to hang his used, dirty towels up the right way so they can dry before sitting in the hamper for days! He did it







It's awsome! Good Luck with your pet peeve!

EDIT: I was wrong! He just did the squished up wet hanging towel again. If I leave it there it will be stinky and mildewy, so of course I am compelled to spread it out. WHY can't a grown person hang up a towel the right way!!!!


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## mistymama (Oct 12, 2004)

Well I know my hubby would NEVER remember to do that! So don't feel too bad!

But I will tell you what I do - I wash laundry, fold and put away mine and ds's (and maybe dh's socks, undies and undershirts if I'm feeling generous) and then I leave the rest of dh's stuff laid out flat (inside out or not) for him to put away!


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## onelilguysmommy (May 11, 2005)

Why bother turning them? I mean you, not him.


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## choli (Jun 20, 2002)

I was taught to wash clothes inside out as it is easier on the fabric.


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## My3guys (May 27, 2009)

Your husband puts his shirts in the hamper?


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## moondiapers (Apr 14, 2002)

we wash inside out on purpose so that the right side stays new looking longer.


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## ElliesMomma (Sep 21, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *choli* 
I was taught to wash clothes inside out as it is easier on the fabric.

well, there's easier on the fabric, and then there's easier on the housekeeper.

i vote easier on the housekeeper.

and ps: i feel the same way about loading the dish washer to full capacity. if i hold off on running it until it is "completely full" in order to save energy, i always wind up with a sink full of more dishes waiting to be washed after the "full load" is complete. this is psychologically damaging to my sense of getting things done around the house, and i decided that there is "saving energy" from the power company, and then there is "saving *my* energy" -- and i'm going with the latter.


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## mommysarah5 (Jun 22, 2009)

Glad im not the only one in this boat!!

I really don't care about clothes staying new-looking. We just wear them to cover our bodies. I am all about whats practical, and turning his shirts the right way is not! LOL

in other news, my husband forgot (again!) to put the lid on properly on the cookie container. (he forget this every time he takes a cookie) and now no one can have cookies because ants got to them


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## Honey693 (May 5, 2008)

DH leaves a lot of his stuff inside out too. Now I just fold them inside out and if he says anything I tell him he's just lucky I washed and folded them at all


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## mommysarah5 (Jun 22, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ElliesMomma* 
well, there's easier on the fabric, and then there's easier on the housekeeper.

i vote easier on the housekeeper.

and ps: i feel the same way about loading the dish washer to full capacity. if i hold off on running it until it is "completely full" in order to save energy, i always wind up with a sink full of more dishes waiting to be washed after the "full load" is complete. this is psychologically damaging to my sense of getting things done around the house, and i decided that there is "saving energy" from the power company, and then there is "saving *my* energy" -- and i'm going with the latter.

I like the way you think


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## Liquesce (Nov 4, 2006)

Who complains about wrong-side-out folded laundry? We always just wash and fold however things land in the hamper ... it's not like there is some hardship in turning them the other way before putting them on.


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## Laggie (Nov 2, 2005)

I don't turn my shirts right side out either... I put them on the hangers inside out half the time too... t-shirts that is. Most of my t-shirts have prints on them so it's better to wash them inside out anyway.

And then I'm just lazy when I hang them up.

Socks in a ball, though, that irritates me because then they aren't dry when they come out of the dryer.


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## mommysarah5 (Jun 22, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Crystal_R* 
DH leaves a lot of his stuff inside out too. Now I just fold them inside out and if he says anything I tell him he's just lucky I washed and folded them at all









exactly!!!

And maybe its just me, but I'll wear jeans a few times before washing them. I don't understand washing clean clothes, and I find when it comes to his I am doing this frequently! lol


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## mommysarah5 (Jun 22, 2009)

I should add, when it comes to his graphic tees, if it's folded inside out I then have to find the shirt he is looking for, because he thinks its lost because it looks like a plain shirt and he can't tell which shirt is which LOL


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## Krisis (May 29, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *CottontailKate* 
Your husband puts his shirts in the hamper?











My DH is pretty good about laundry related things, but other stuff... like, putting things away in the kitchen...

Well, I don't let him "clean up" in the kitchen anymore because then it takes me days to figure out where he put everything.


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## amynbebes (Aug 28, 2008)

You can see where dh takes his clothes off. I get home from night at work and inevitably his shirt is draped over the back of the couch, his shoes are in the floor of the family room and his socks are somewhere nearby. As far as the shirts I turn them right side out while folding because I'm anal about it but his socks, well he's lucky if I bother to find a match. He can play the match game with his socks.


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## MusicianDad (Jun 24, 2008)

Far as I know, turning clothes from inside out to inside in is part of doing laundry, it doesn't exactly take a whole lot of time either.


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## ~PurityLake~ (Jul 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *JamieCatheryn* 
I've got one though, my DH gets up in the middle of the night for a snack- cereal, yogurt, ice cream, popsicle, whatever. Often, he finishes off a container, and puts it back/leaves it in the fridge or pantry! I see it and think we still have some, plan to have it, don't buy more, then go to get it out and find nothing is left!

That's weird. Maybe you could do it, too.







Then he might think of using a trash can in the future.


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## sunnmama (Jul 3, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mommysarah5* 
So I'm no suzy homemaker, but I do enough in a day as it is, and I draw the line and shirt turning. I feel better now lol

I'm glad you feel better









I wonder why you stressed so much over this in the first place? Maybe I'm just laid back (or lazy







), but I often fold shirts inside-out and put them away. I just don't think it's a big deal, and my family can "right" them before they wear them. They've never complained







I do the same for my shirts, lol!

Othertimes, I "right" them. It depends on my mood.

eta to add....dh does laundry, too. He is better than my about "righting" them, but he doesn't always. No biggie!


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## ~PurityLake~ (Jul 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mommysarah5* 
in other news, my husband forgot (again!) to put the lid on properly on the cookie container. (he forget this every time he takes a cookie) and now no one can have cookies because ants got to them









When I bake cookies, I leave a few out on a plate on the counter. The rest go in a ziploc bag in the freezer. I learned this from my dad. He loved/loves baking and would do so on weekends. He'd bake enough for a couple weeks or for a month, so he'd freeze the extra. I actually began to prefer frozen chocolate chip cookies over hot gooey ones (because I didn't want to wait for them to thaw).


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## ~PurityLake~ (Jul 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mommysarah5* 
I really don't care about clothes staying new-looking.
We just wear them to cover our bodies.
I am all about whats practical, and turning his shirts the right way is not!

Me, too.


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## Mountaingirl79 (Jul 12, 2008)

Sorry to laugh. My dh does the same thing.....it's not one of the things that bothers *me* but I understand. I say, pick your battles...this isn't one I would try to battle! ( The clothes seem just as clean to me, inside out or not.







)


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## ~PurityLake~ (Jul 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *amynbebes* 
...but his socks, well he's lucky if I bother to find a match. He can play the match game with his socks.

Oh yeah. The socks. I won't even touch his when they're dirty. Yuck! Sweaty, stinky, fungal yeasty smelling things they are. He** no. If he doesn't put them directly into the washing machine, they normally won't be washed. He occasionally leaves them on the living room floor when he removes them shortly after getting home from work. They may stay there a couple days, or I will grab the broom and use it to pick them up and toss in the washing machine when I'm tired of looking at them. But I will not touch them when they're unwashed. I haven't sorted/folded socks in ages, I can't even remember when I used to. I know I did because my mom was so anal about these things. My husband has a sock drawer. All his clean socks are tossed in there. In the morning, he sits on the edge of the bed, opens the drawer and tries to find a couple that are similar. All his socks are either white or black and mostly the same brand, so it really doesn't matter anyway.


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## ~PurityLake~ (Jul 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MusicianDad* 
Far as I know, turning clothes from inside out to inside in is part of doing laundry, it doesn't exactly take a whole lot of time either.

I think it's fairly normal, too. But I don't do it before the clothes are washed. Ew. I don't like getting dirty clothes all over my skin. I wait until they are fresh and clean from the dryer before flipping them.

Oh, it's just my husband's clothes I have this aversion to, not mine or my daughters. It's because his job is not one of the cleanest so his clothes are quite nasty after a day at work.


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## cyncyn (Nov 19, 2004)

This thread made me laugh because dh asked ME to please turn my clothes right side out when I put them in the hamper so he didn't have to turn them when doing laundry. This was a few years ago when he did more laundry and I did more cooking. I tend to wash whichever way items end up, but I do flip things right side out when folding. Dh is a much neater folder than I am too.


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## RebeccaWo (Apr 1, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MusicianDad* 
Far as I know, turning clothes from inside out to inside in is part of doing laundry, it doesn't exactly take a whole lot of time either.









:

I turn everything inside-out when I wash anyways. It's a great way to prevent wash wear. I also zip, snap, and button everything up, but that might be part of my laundry-induced OCD.

What squicks me out is fishing the rolled together sock balls from DH's gym bag. So gross.


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## mistymama (Oct 12, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *~Purity♥Lake~* 
I think it's fairly normal, too. But I don't do it before the clothes are washed. Ew. I don't like getting dirty clothes all over my skin. I wait until they are fresh and clean from the dryer before flipping them.

Oh, it's just my husband's clothes I have this aversion to, not mine or my daughters. It's because his job is not one of the cleanest so his clothes are quite nasty after a day at work.

My husband's work clothes stink, esp in the summer. He sweats a ton and they are damp and GROSS. I actually don't touch them - he puts them in the hamper and I will grab them with a dirty towel or something to put them in the wash.







No way in h*ll I'm going to turn them right side out before washing!!!!


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## ~PurityLake~ (Jul 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mistymama* 
My husband's work clothes stink, esp in the summer. He sweats a ton and they are damp and GROSS. I actually don't touch them - he puts them in the hamper and I will grab them with a dirty towel or something to put them in the wash.







No way in h*ll I'm going to turn them right side out before washing!!!!

Ah, it's nice to know I'm not the only one. The only difference is that we don't us laundry hampers and I don't sort colors. Dirty clothes go in the machine and when it's full, I wash a load. I like keeping things simple. None of us own any fancy clothes that require special treatment. Well, I misspoke. My daughters have a couple fancy dresses Grandma just 'had' to buy them. The only special treatment those dresses get are they are removed sooner from the dryer than the other clothes.


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## Dandelionkid (Mar 6, 2007)

ooo,oo,ooo I'll go! Doing a small load when there is a mountain of dirty laundry sitting right beside the machine- a big pet peeve of mine.


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## mistymama (Oct 12, 2004)

Purity you do keep it simple! My dh used to do laundry that way, but I have to seperate. I hate how my white tees get dingy when washed with darks.







:

I'm also glad I'm not the only one who hates dh's stinky work clothing. I only wish I could hide it away in the washer until ready to go.


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## ~PurityLake~ (Jul 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Dandelionkid* 
ooo,oo,ooo I'll go! Doing a small load when there is a mountain of dirty laundry sitting right beside the machine- a big pet peeve of mine.

Oh, gosh, this just reminded me. Once in a while, my husband will wash a small load of clothes if he's run out of his few black shirts and black jeans for work. He will remove all dirty clothes from the washing machine to toss in his set of clothes because he thinks it will be faster than washing a larger load.


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## ~PurityLake~ (Jul 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mistymama* 
Purity you do keep it simple! My dh used to do laundry that way, but I have to separate. I hate how my white tees get dingy when washed with darks.







:


See, that's why it doesn't bother me. I don't own any white tees.







I don't wear anything white other than my socks. And I don't care how sparkly my socks are. I rarely ever wear socks, anyway.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mistymama* 
I'm also glad I'm not the only one who hates dh's stinky work clothing. I only wish I could hide it away in the washer until ready to go.









It really makes my life less stinky being able to hide all dirty clothing in the washer. Although, I will add, I do not ever close my washer lid unless it is in the process of washing. If I do, it begins to smell a bit moldy. I sometimes run bleach in there with no clothes to freshen it up a bit.


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## Dandelionkid (Mar 6, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *~Purity♥Lake~* 
Oh, gosh, this just reminded me. Once in a while, my husband will wash a small load of clothes if he's run out of his few black shirts and black jeans for work. He will remove all dirty clothes from the washing machine to toss in his set of clothes because he thinks it will be faster than washing a larger load.









Yes- it never fails







We once had a pet peeve discussion. We each took a few minutes and back-and-forth listed all our pet peeves about each other. It was pretty light-hearted but very nice to get it all out!


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## seaheroine (Dec 24, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *CottontailKate* 
Your husband puts his shirts in the hamper?











I also fold shirts inside out.

DH always throws his clothes on the bathroom floor.

As such, I'll usually have a dark load waiting in the washer ready to go. When he gets home, I'll tell him to put his work clothes in and start it. If he forgets, well...he wears dirty clothes the next day. If he starts the washer, I'll put everything in the dryer before bed.

He doesn't help with the laundry at all, so I don't think walking his clothes twenty feet to the laundry room is too much to ask. Sounds harsh...but after so many years I am tired of picking up laundry on the floor.


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## seaheroine (Dec 24, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *~Purity♥Lake~* 
OThey may stay there a couple days, or I will grab the broom and use it to pick them up and toss in the washing machine when I'm tired of looking at them. But I will not touch them when they're unwashed.









:

Pretty much!


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## mbhf (Jan 8, 2005)

this used to drive me insane (along with the non-sorting and putting clean clothes in the hamper) for years. Eventually I just moved my hampers to the laundry room and put a basket in the bedroom. DH and the kids all toss their clothes in there and I sort them every morning, including righting the inside out shirts. It only takes a minute and usually inspires me to start a load of laundry right away.


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## DianeMarie (Jul 7, 2009)

Can I contribute the peeves of my ex-husband? Maybe then it will be clear why I got divorced......

I attempted to have 3 different hampers--one for darks, one for whites and one for colors. He ignored them, and would either leave his clothes all over the floor, or just take them off and put everything he had on in whatever hamper he felt like lifting the top off of.

He used to take off his socks, inside out, then put them in a ball and put them in the hamper. I got sick of unballing them and turning them the right way, so I started just putting them in the washing machine in the backwards ball----but get this, he got made at me for NOT unballing them and turning them right side in!!!

He used to take a shower and leave the wet towel on top of the just-made bed............despite me asking him time and time again not to do that because it made the bed all wet.

He would make a peanut butter sandwich, and leave the knife with peanut butter (and sometimes jelly) all over it in the sink. The peanut butter would get hard and get onto the sink----and guess who had to take a scrubbie pad and get it off??

He smoked, and if there was no ash tray within his arm's reach so he could squash the butt out, he would balance the filter on it's head on any flat surface. That used to drive me NUTS!! I'd be walking around the house, finding cig butts on his nightstand, on the desk where the computer was, in the coffee table in front of the couch.

He was just a total slob, seriously. Those are just a couple of the things he used to do---there are a ton more, believe me. He was just totally inept to do anything for himself----like a child that never advanced from age 4. But, he was a lawyer, so go figure. If it weren't for me, he would have showed up in court with holes in his pants.


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## BroodyWoodsgal (Jan 30, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MusicianDad* 
Far as I know, turning clothes from inside out to inside in is part of doing laundry, it doesn't exactly take a whole lot of time either.

laughup


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## BroodyWoodsgal (Jan 30, 2008)

I think I'm much more laid back..it never even occurred to me to get mad about something like this!









See, I am not a heathan, so my clothing is properly sorted, checked and turned outside out (if it even IS outside in, I don't leave things lying about like that) and ready to go with the appropriate load. His is laying in small heaps around the bathroom and ocassionally his study.

I do all the laundry, MY preference. I'm, ahem, picky. He will sometimes do a load for himself, but it falls under housekeeping, and that is my business around here...but, if you are a grown person, I think you are capable of making sure your laundry is in the proper state for washing when it is put wherever you expect that it will be retrieved for load time and as such, I wash 'em how I get 'em. No skin off my rear if he likes his clothes washed unbottoned and inside out. But to tell you the truth, I don't think he's ever thought about it either!


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## cristeen (Jan 20, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *amynbebes* 
his socks, well he's lucky if I bother to find a match. He can play the match game with his socks.

I don't match. I buy about a dozen of a style, in a solid color (black or white), and I got him a laundry basket. All the socks get dumped in the basket, and he can fish a pair out each morning. I wear socks maybe 6 times a year, so it's not my problem.









Quote:


Originally Posted by *mistymama* 
Purity you do keep it simple! My dh used to do laundry that way, but I have to seperate. I hate how my white tees get dingy when washed with darks.







:

What are white tees?







DH owns a couple graphics ones that are white, but we actually have very little white anything in our house... so I'm with Purity - I wash everything together. I do all the sheets/towels/cleaning clothes/family cloth together and I do all the clothes together. It really cuts down on the number of times I have to trek up and down the stairs with laundry.

As for the flipping of the shirts - I don't. I fold them however they ended up in my basket.


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## mommysarah5 (Jun 22, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mistymama* 
Purity you do keep it simple! My dh used to do laundry that way, but I have to seperate. I hate how my white tees get dingy when washed with darks.







:

I'm also glad I'm not the only one who hates dh's stinky work clothing. I only wish I could hide it away in the washer until ready to go.









I didn't use to separate whites or colors either. I still don't do lights and darks, but DH said it was important to him I wash whites and colors separate. And I think its important he turns his clothes around himself - whether it be before or after I was them lol.


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## mommysarah5 (Jun 22, 2009)

on a funny note - DH mentioned he appreciates me today LOL don't hear that often, maybe he just now noticed I've spent the last few years turning his clothes around after I'd already asked him to do it himself. Perhaps he will remember now that he is turning them himself lol


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## kirstenb (Oct 4, 2007)

My DH can't seem to remember to take anything out of his pockets. W're not talking about a random scrap here or there either. His cammi pants have about 6 different pockets and they are loaded with crap- little notebooks, random scraps of important paper, snack wrappers, coins, dirty ear plugs from the range, pens, an occasional cigarette butt... I got tired of sorting the important stuff from the trash so I starting tossing it all in a little plastic bin. If he's looking for something, he can check there. I keep the money though.


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## ~PurityLake~ (Jul 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *cristeen* 

so I'm with Purity - I wash everything together. I do all the sheets/towels/cleaning clothes/family cloth together and I do all the clothes together. It really cuts down on the number of times I have to trek up and down the stairs with laundry.

As for the flipping of the shirts - I don't. I fold them however they ended up in my basket.

I'm lucky that our washing machine and dryer are inside our bathroom.
I can't imagine a better place for them.

I don't fold any clothes.
I hang up shirts and pants in the closet. I toss socks and underwear in drawers. Okay, I fold towels, washcloths, sheets, blankets and my shorts so they'll fit in my drawer, but I don't fold most clothes.


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## fork (Feb 7, 2007)

At least you get him to put them in the hamper. I told DP that I'm not washing anything unless it's in the hamper, so before laundry day he goes around and collects everything and puts it in the hamper. He likes to fold dirty clothes and set them aside in case he wants to wear them again before laundry day. I don't get it, the man has 3x as many clothes as I do (and I have a lot of clothes), so it's not like he can't just pick something else to wear in the week between laundry days. The inside out doesn't bother me, I just shake it out before I hang it up or iron it.


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## sapphire_chan (May 2, 2005)

If you have a washing machine where there's a noticeable difference from a shirt rightside out and a shirt inside out, you need a new washer.

Mommysarah5,







: for folding them inside out. Best choice!


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## sapphire_chan (May 2, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *fork* 
He likes to fold dirty clothes and set them aside in case he wants to wear them again before laundry day. I don't get it, the man has 3x as many clothes as I do (and I have a lot of clothes), so it's not like he can't just pick something else to wear in the week between laundry days.

And have you noticed that there's still 4x as much of his laundry as yours, even with rewearing?

As for all the extra clothes, I've found that changing clothes out twice a year to switch seasons has actually encouraged dh to get rid of tons of clothes. It took like 5 years, but this last time he was saying things like "I didn't wear this shirt since the last time we did this, do we have a place for give aways?"


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## mamatoablessing (Oct 17, 2005)

I just want to say to the OP, I am right there with you!!! I told DH years ago that if he didn't turn his clothes right side out before putting them in the laundry, that they'd stay that way. And I still do it and he doesn't even care. I know some people think it's not a big deal but I HATE when I'm folding laundry and have to keep flipping clothes right side out. I can get the laundry folded so much faster if I don't have to stop and fiddle with every shirt, pant, sock and boxer. Forget it.

Oh, and my DH also goes through triple the amount of clothes the rest of us do. I swear he changes like 3 times a day and puts everything he wore (even if it was only for an hour) in the dirty laundry. If he pulls a shirt off the hanger and it has weird wrinkle in it or something, instead of ironing it or wetting it with some water, he just throws it back into the laundry basket. So sometimes, I'm washing perfectly clean clothes!!!

Sorry, but he's perfectly capable of flipping his own clothes.


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## 2cutiekitties (Dec 3, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *choli* 
I was taught to wash clothes inside out as it is easier on the fabric.


same here. It is a must for jeans.


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## mamatoablessing (Oct 17, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *sapphire_chan* 
And have you noticed that there's still 4x as much of his laundry as yours, even with rewearing?

As for all the extra clothes, I've found that changing clothes out twice a year to switch seasons has actually encouraged dh to get rid of tons of clothes. It took like 5 years, but this last time he was saying things like "I didn't wear this shirt since the last time we did this, do we have a place for give aways?"

You know- DH always does this. Takes something he wore, folds it up and totally intends to wear it again. But he never does!!! What happens is he'll run out of shorts or whatever and like once a week will go around and gather up all of the piles of folded, slightly worn clothes, and throw them all in the laundry basket. Drives me totally batty.


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## Belia (Dec 22, 2007)

Am I the only one who doesn't do DH's laundry??









I haven't in 10 years. He has never done mine, either, except when I was so sick when pg.

When we got married, we figured that we are both grown-ups who had been doing our laundry for years, so why change??? He does his.... I do mine (and now the boy's)... so I could care less what he does with his dirty clothes.

Now I can't imagine doing it any other way.


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## number572 (Aug 25, 2004)

Never bugged me, if it bugs you... simply wash&fold the shirt inside out, then the inside/outside switching is on him when he dresses, the folding lines will still be the same... unless he wants to wear his shit inside out, that is. Let go of the struggle, yk? And don't take on his laziness as your own problem.

editing to add - read more of the thread & its clear that some pp's entire families are being disrespectful on a consistent basis.


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## Fuamami (Mar 16, 2005)

I have to turn the clothes right side out so I can put Spray N Wash on them! Doesn't everyone else stain every article of clothing they own?

That's why I hate doing the kids clothes. It takes so long to turn them right side out and stain treat them. And, of course, 72 items of children's clothing fit in my washer, and then all need to be hung on the line, and then all folded. Maybe I should train my kids to stain treat their own clothes! I have had no luck training MY husband, so I think you're doing good MommySarah


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## Just1More (Jun 19, 2008)

Hehehe...I'm a ocd with laundry, too, so whatever extra work I get serves me right. I don't mind. I'm terribly strict about what gets washed with what, and I'm very careful with our clothes. I very much dislike when everything turns grey.

But...the WORST is fishing out USED earplugs from damp, greasy jean pockets, which are also filled with sawdust. I had to plead about that. (Shiver.)

And then there was the time when I washed his uniform, and when I put it in the dryer my hand began to burn and sting really bad. Ah yes, that was "gas chamber" day at work. It hurt for hours. That was fun.


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## *Erin* (Mar 18, 2002)

oh op. i feel your pain. i do.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *CottontailKate* 
Your husband puts his shirts in the hamper?

yea, really! how'd you get him to do that?

mine leaves his halfway inside out-somehow always only one arm is inside out. he also leaves his belt in his pants. and he leaves the whole mess on the floor. leaving it on the floor and not washing it is not an option. i've tried that. he will let it pile up until he literally has to CLIMB over it to reach the bathtub. it's insane.


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## kcstar (Mar 20, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mommysarah5* 
I didn't use to separate whites or colors either. I still don't do lights and darks, but DH said it was important to him I wash whites and colors separate. And I think its important he turns his clothes around himself - whether it be before or after I was them lol.

We do lights and darks. Whites go in the light load. For ten years it was just the two of us, and even with regular wearing we simply didn't have enough white clothing to be worth a load without adding in some of our gray t-shirts or work khaki's.

With DH as SAHD, we've kinda swapped traditions. He cooks, does laundry and dishes. I do the garden, drilling, and general fix-up. We try to share the cleaning.


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## number572 (Aug 25, 2004)

Wow, reading thru this thread... I seriously think that the "offenders" have learned somehow, that its okay or at the least, worth the verbal assault, in order to continue to act childish when putting their laundry into the cycle. I mean, really, a grown adult or a child past the age of recognizing the terms inside/outside should, out of respect... be fully able and willing (b'c they respect what you are doing for them by washing/drying./folding their clothes) enough to turn their laundry! Its really disrespecting for anyone, maybe reteach that lesson. If its your spouse, just don't turn it!

Its very insulting at the least! I understand why alot of you are mad. It really is inexcusable. I see this as a completely disrespectful action.


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## Amandamarie (May 2, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *kirstenb* 
My DH can't seem to remember to take anything out of his pockets. W're not talking about a random scrap here or there either. His cammi pants have about 6 different pockets and they are loaded with crap- little notebooks, random scraps of important paper, snack wrappers, coins, dirty ear plugs from the range, pens, an occasional cigarette butt... I got tired of sorting the important stuff from the trash so I starting tossing it all in a little plastic bin. If he's looking for something, he can check there. I keep the money though.









My dh forgets to take stuff out of his pockets too. I throw out the trash and put the receipts on his desk. Coins go in dd's piggy bank and I keep any money I find. I consider it my tip. Some laundry days I get big tips


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## Just1More (Jun 19, 2008)

Lol. I started a "daddy dump". Anything that was his lying around went into an easily accessible basket in the closet. It works great! (for me, anyway). Well, for him, too. He knows where all his stuff is!

The basket grew and grew until it was this huge box, though. He recently went through it and discovered a lot of long-lost stuff. It was like Christmas!


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## purplemoon (Sep 24, 2008)

Count me in the peeps that fold inside out if that is how I found it. I do it to my own and it takes me a second to turn again. Laundry is my enemy and so my laundy skills are not great. All clothes are washed together but the only thing I do is sort kids from mine so that each load has a room to go to. My clothes look like crap because of this, but at least my kids outgrow theirs and with me? Eh. I'll live.


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## Fuamami (Mar 16, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Just1More* 
But...the WORST is fishing out USED earplugs from damp, greasy jean pockets, which are also filled with sawdust. I had to plead about that. (Shiver.)

Oh yeah! I hate that too! I'm glad he's wearing them, since he's already as deaf as a post, but yuck, yuck, yuck!


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## pomplemoose (Dec 28, 2008)

i dont sort very well either. DP and i both work full time but he also does school so lots and lots of the house stuff falls on me... to my anger and disappointment. i wash it how i found it. and ill fold it. he can put it away (although i did laundry a week ago and he still didnt put it away) but i dont match socks. yuck we have a huge basket of socks in the hall way and everyone just picks them out of there in the mornings haha.


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## confustication (Mar 18, 2006)

Wait, you mean some of you actually get time to fold?! I'm lucky if I find time to toss things in the washer and hope they make it to the dryer. If they're clean, I'm happy- no matter which way they're turned.

Actually, I'd be happy to actually see the top of my washer and dryer on a regular basis, the clothes often land there before being sorted.

For the most part, in our family, anyone old enough to reach the washer is responsible for washing their own laundry. I try to carve out time to run linens and so on when I can, but it's often a matter of my throwing them in the machine and asking DH to put them in the dryer when they are done. Most of the time he does put them in the dryer, but he doesn't always actually START the dryer....

*sigh*

The idea of having time enough to turn a shirt inside out- even if I resented it- sounds lovely.


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## kirstenb (Oct 4, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *confustication* 
Actually, I'd be happy to actually see the top of my washer and dryer on a regular basis, the clothes often land there before being sorted.











Sounds a lot like mine- there are usually a mountain of clean clothes on top of both of them. If I realize there is a shirt I haven't seen in a few weeks, it's the first place I look.


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## TinkerBelle (Jun 29, 2005)

I realize, that, to some, it is no big deal, but to me, it is the little things that add up and cause the most trouble.

I don't understand why grown people expect others to pick up after them? I mean, I don't expect my husband to clean up after me, pick up my dirty underwear. Or anyone else, for that matter.

Why is it such a hardship for people to unwad their filthy socks and turn their dirty clothes right side out? I mean, I love when my husband does laundry, so I try to make it as easy on him as possible.

To me, it is a sign of entitlement-minded behavior and disrespect. As in, "Oh well, my MAID will do it, so I won't."


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## GuildJenn (Jan 10, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *TinkerBelle* 
I realize, that, to some, it is no big deal, but to me, it is the little things that add up and cause the most trouble.

I don't understand why grown people expect others to pick up after them? I mean, I don't expect my husband to clean up after me, pick up my dirty underwear. Or anyone else, for that matter.

Why is it such a hardship for people to unwad their filthy socks and turn their dirty clothes right side out? I mean, I love when my husband does laundry, so I try to make it as easy on him as possible.

To me, it is a sign of entitlement-minded behavior and disrespect. As in, "Oh well, my MAID will do it, so I won't."

It really, really, really depends on the person. My husband generally cleans up after himself (no hairs in the sink, rings in the bath, socks in the living room), but he's not great at chores or being totally consistent. It truly is not a lack of respect thing with him.

One of the reasons our relationship works for us is that we don't sweat the small stuff. I refuse to give the laundry that much power either way. It is possible to love someone and still not turn the shirts a particular direction at any stage in the process.

That is not saying that it's not important for other people! But for us, it really is not.


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## mistymama (Oct 12, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *TinkerBelle* 
I realize, that, to some, it is no big deal, but to me, it is the little things that add up and cause the most trouble.

I don't understand why grown people expect others to pick up after them? I mean, I don't expect my husband to clean up after me, pick up my dirty underwear. Or anyone else, for that matter.

Why is it such a hardship for people to unwad their filthy socks and turn their dirty clothes right side out? I mean, I love when my husband does laundry, so I try to make it as easy on him as possible.

To me, it is a sign of entitlement-minded behavior and disrespect. As in, "Oh well, my MAID will do it, so I won't."

I can see how you feel that way, but I'm willing to bet your husband does not think about it like that. Some people are just forgetful - I can promise you I would have a hard time remembering to turn my shirts a certain way before putting them in the laundry. In fact, I'd rather just tell my hubby to fold them as-is or make a pile of my stuff and let me put it away before he made me remember to turn dirty laundry a certain way.









I grew up with a Mom who did stuff like this - and would get really upset over petty, small things. I swore a long, long time ago to NEVER EVER do a chore around the house if I was going to resent it. If I do it, it's because I want to - a gift of sorts. If I'm going to resent it, I'd rather leave it undone or ask for dh's help.

Seriously, life is way too short to be upset over something so small, with so many easy fixes.

Sorry if that sounds harsh, but I think you need to see the bigger picture here.


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## Megan73 (May 16, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Belia* 
Am I the only one who doesn't do DH's laundry??








I haven't in 10 years. He has never done mine, either, except when I was so sick when pg.
When we got married, we figured that we are both grown-ups who had been doing our laundry for years, so why change??? He does his.... I do mine (and now the boy's)... so I could care less what he does with his dirty clothes.
Now I can't imagine doing it any other way.

You're not the only one. We each do our own. We take turns doing the baby's - although my lovely DH folds diapers which I hate, hate, hate doing.


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## mouthcave (Oct 9, 2008)

I gave up on the inside-out laundry thing after, like, a week, haha. My husband sometimes wears his shirts inside-out anyway. Also, balled up socks? Stayed balled up unless I am feeling generous. His socks are disgusting and usually wet from sweat. I don't want to stick my fingers in there!
Most other things that fell under "oh well, my MOM will do it!" territory have stopped since I pointed them out. I think he is usually just in a hurry to undress or something, heh. Also, here's hoping my sons do not get the "my mom will do it!" problem to such a degree. I don't think I have it in me to not pass off chores when I have the chance to so it probably won't be a huge deal. Maybe.


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## SweetPotato (Apr 29, 2006)

I totally wash my dh's shirts (and sometimes my own!) inside out- fold/hang/etc. inside out- socks, too. My dh commented on it once, and I told him that he can always do his own laundry if he doesn't like the way I do it- not meanly, just matter-of-fact. We also wash darks and lights together (only seperate brand-new darks- and have never had any colors run). I never knew that these things made us such laundry slobs! I certainly have my nit-picky complaints about my dh as well, but if I were you I would totally leave his stuff inside out and decide not to spend your energy being bothered about it anymore-- if this is the worst of your problems, then I'd say you guys have it great!


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## mommysarah5 (Jun 22, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *GuildJenn* 
It really, really, really depends on the person. My husband generally cleans up after himself (no hairs in the sink, rings in the bath, socks in the living room), but he's not great at chores or being totally consistent. It truly is not a lack of respect thing with him.

One of the reasons our relationship works for us is that we don't sweat the small stuff. I refuse to give the laundry that much power either way. It is possible to love someone and still not turn the shirts a particular direction at any stage in the process.

That is not saying that it's not important for other people! But for us, it really is not.

we don't sweat the small stuff either. To me this isn't a small thing. I see how it sounds like that, its JUST inside out clothes after all, but when you do EVERYTHING and I mean EVERYTHING around the house, sometimes what is a little thing to someone else is a big thing to someone else. He does NOTHING around the house. I don't mind, because he works and takes good care of us. BUT the one thing I ask is him to turn his clothes the right way. But, no big deal - he still wont do it and im not going to fight with him over it. At the same time, im not going to turn his clothes the right way before folding them. Additionally, he didn't seem to mind, probably because to him its a small thing, and we don't sweat the small stuff


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## mommysarah5 (Jun 22, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *SweetPotato* 
I totally wash my dh's shirts (and sometimes my own!) inside out- fold/hang/etc. inside out- socks, too. My dh commented on it once, and I told him that he can always do his own laundry if he doesn't like the way I do it- not meanly, just matter-of-fact. We also wash darks and lights together (only seperate brand-new darks- and have never had any colors run). I never knew that these things made us such laundry slobs! I certainly have my nit-picky complaints about my dh as well, but if I were you I would totally leave his stuff inside out and decide not to spend your energy being bothered about it anymore-- if this is the worst of your problems, then I'd say you guys have it great!

thanks. I realized that the turning them the right way for him was what was making this a big deal. Just folding them as is has been liberating! lol. Turning them inside out is not "not sweating the small stuff". Not sweating the small stuff is me just folding them the way they are







I don't know why I continued to do this for so long?? I guess I just felt some kind of wifely obligation or something, like you know, Martha Stuart would turn the clothes the right way before folding them. but heck, I go a lot. My responsibilities include all the cleaning, cookings, and child care. In fact, I also "fix" everything in the house that gets broken. I think he has it pretty good, even if I don't turn his shirts around for him after washing him. I take a lot of responsibility for everyone in this house, but that is one responsibility that I am starting to feel needs to be given proper ownership at this point. I want my husband to have clean clothes to wear, and I am doing the laundry anyway, so washing his is no problem. But turning the shirts the right way? Well, obviously he doesn't care if they are the right way, so why should I turn them for him? They are his clothes, if he wants them the right way then I'm sure he'll turn them that way himself.


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## erinsmama (May 13, 2009)

It's funny, the laundry inside out thing would not bother me, probably because I'm guilty of this too. Other things bother me that others would probably think I was crazy for being bothered by.

I get the coffee pot ready every night to auto brew in the am. I think my husband thinks there is a coffee fairy that comes & makes coffee for him. He does actually call me the "sugar fairy." One time he said to me "You're doing my job-I'm supposed to make coffee", I said, "Since when is this your job? I've been making coffee for years." I have to take coffee to go & rush out the door in the morning after getting dd all ready to go (breakfast, dressed teeth, hair combing) to take to daycare (I pick her up & make dinner so he just comes home & eats!). He just showers, drinks coffee & hangs out with dd until it's time for him to go! Lucky man.


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## sunny*pa*mom (Mar 28, 2008)

This used to bug me too. So I started folding inside out. A few months later I mentioned it to dh and he never even noticed. lol

And his running clothes go directly into a laundry basket next to the washer. Those are too gross to touch.

My sweet 5 year old is the only one that thanks me for doing his laundry though.


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## GuildJenn (Jan 10, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mommysarah5* 
we don't sweat the small stuff either. To me this isn't a small thing. I see how it sounds like that, its JUST inside out clothes after all, but when you do EVERYTHING and I mean EVERYTHING around the house, sometimes what is a little thing to someone else is a big thing to someone else. He does NOTHING around the house. I don't mind, because he works and takes good care of us. BUT the one thing I ask is him to turn his clothes the right way. But, no big deal - he still wont do it and im not going to fight with him over it. At the same time, im not going to turn his clothes the right way before folding them. Additionally, he didn't seem to mind, probably because to him its a small thing, and we don't sweat the small stuff









I think you found a brilliant solution - truly.


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## mommysarah5 (Jun 22, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *GuildJenn* 
I think you found a brilliant solution - truly.









Thanks! Really I just have to laugh at myself that I let myself be bothered about it for this long. Well, not every time I folded the laundry, but every now and then it just cropped up... I dont know why I didn't start doing things this way a long time ago lol


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## alicewyf (Apr 24, 2008)

DH and I have a policy that we don't have an obligation do things for each other if we will end up resenting having to do it. Once in a while, sure, when the other person needs it, but not as a regular chore. We've found that as soon as one of us feels obligated to take care of the other like that on a regular basis, it is relationship-hurting. You should like doing it, and if you don't, there is something wrong.

So I don't do his laundry. The most I'll do is hang up his nice stuff for him if he has a load in the dryer and has to leave the house before it'll be done drying. This system works well for us! Especially since he has like twice the amount of clothing that I do.

I also don't clean up after him. I do pile his stuff up so he can take care of it when he gets home, but there is no maidliness going on in this house!


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## journeymom (Apr 2, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Liquesce* 
Who complains about wrong-side-out folded laundry? We always just wash and fold however things land in the hamper ... it's not like there is some hardship in turning them the other way before putting them on.









No kidding!

Seriously, with how difficult it is for me to get anything done around here, I do not bother turning shirts right side out when I fold them. We're lucky I'm emptying the basket. Anything to cut the resentment down.

Dh either does not notice or does not care whether the clean, folded clothes are right side out.


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## jillmamma (Apr 11, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Amandamarie* 
My dh forgets to take stuff out of his pockets too. I throw out the trash and put the receipts on his desk. Coins go in dd's piggy bank and I keep any money I find. I consider it my tip. Some laundry days I get big tips

















I do the same thing!! My DH is also quite "forgetful" about doing some basic cleaning up after himself...socks under the coffee table, belt on the couch, empty beer bottles on the coffee table, tools on the kitchen counters, etc. I actually keep an extra collapsible clothes hamper in the living room just for him. It DOES help some, if I leave his stuff for a couple of days, he actually will pick up the socks and toss them in there. I think with him, part of the problem is that his mom can't stand any kind of clutter, so always picked up after him, and did not make him do it himself. He is an only child, so she did not have as many people to keep up with. She actually has apologized to me for doing that! (Sweet MIL!)

I also try to put this into perspective...my DH works hard, fixes things around the house, helps out with chores when he can, is a really sweet guy and an all around great husband and father, so if some of his worst faults are leaving socks under the coffee table, I guess I can live with that. Heaven knows he puts up with a lot from me too!


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## cschick (Aug 28, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mommysarah5* 
I didn't use to separate whites or colors either. I still don't do lights and darks, but DH said it was important to him I wash whites and colors separate. And I think its important he turns his clothes around himself - whether it be before or after I was them lol.

I guess I'm just kind of confused as to how people don't end up with big enough loads to separate.

I wash once a week, and I always have enough clothing (with 3 people) for a full load of whites, blues/greens/beiges, and darks. And every two weeks for a full load of reds (and yes, I just let the reds sit in a pile until there's a full load).


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## mommysarah5 (Jun 22, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jillmamma* 

I also try to put this into perspective...my DH works hard, fixes things around the house, helps out with chores when he can, is a really sweet guy and an all around great husband and father, so if some of his worst faults are leaving socks under the coffee table, I guess I can live with that. Heaven knows he puts up with a lot from me too!









Thats a good point. Maybe thats why it wasn't a big deal to me until recently.
Here is what I always do:
Dishes
Laundry
Cleaning
Take out the trash
Change all the kids diapers
give all the kids baths
feed everyone
make my husband's coffee
you name a household chore I do it - including repairs and assemblies.

That same list is the list of things my husband NEVER does. Ever. But he used to, and since he doesn't anymore, I think thats why this little thing started bothering me. I didn't need to let it though, I can just fold it the way it goes into the washer. Should have started doing that a long time ago regardless I think lol. I don't mind doing everything, and I know he works more hours then he used to, so thats not really a problem, it's just there are some things that I am realizing that it's silly I do for him when obviously it doesn't effect him and wont effect me either. Like I don't mind washing his dishes, because I want an empty sink. But turning his shirts before folding them? well, he doesn't care, and they aren't my shirts, so why do I do it if its making my life even a tiny bit harder? It's craziness I tell ya that I even let it bother me to begin with







:


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## itsrtimedownhere (Jul 18, 2008)

i get made at him for the t-shirt thing too. even though i'm guilty of it too.









we tried the each wash our own clothes thing after he asked me to do it a different way and i said "if you want it done differently, you can do it you G D self." he said ok and i stopped washing his clothes. but he never started! it just piled up and piled up. it got to where i had to literally CLIMB over the pile of dirty clothes to get to the bedroom. it was ridiculous. so i just started doing it again because it was driving me crazy.

THEN like 2 weeks later, i told him we had to go shopping (it's an hour drive away and is usually a day long thing) and he says "ok, but can we go tomorrow because i have to do wash."

i asked him "what wash?"
dh- you know, i started doing my own clothes.
me- you did? when was the last time?
dh - i dunno. a little while ago.
me - really?
dh - i dunno
me - where are the clothes you have to wash?
dh - uhh....
me - how do you still have full drawers of clothes?
dh - uhh... are you doing it?
me - i guess the way i wash it isn't too bad, is it?
dh - i guess not..

haha that was the end of that little experiment.


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## limabean (Aug 31, 2005)

I guess this is one of those things I just don't even notice. Some of our clothes are inside-out and some are right-side-out when they go in the wash, and that's how they get washed, folded, and put away.









I guess the logical reasoning for this could be that it only takes a second to flip one shirt right-side-out just before you put it on, but it would take a while to flip all the shirts in the laundry right-side-out before folding. But honestly I don't even give it that much consideration -- having inside-out shirts hanging in my closet doesn't even register on my radar, and my DH has never mentioned it one way or the other. I'm actually surprised to learn that it's an issue for some people!


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## onlyzombiecat (Aug 15, 2004)

I'm glad you feel better.

I don't stress about laundry much. Clothes go in the washer the way they are put in the hamper. I wash all clothes in cold water. I don't check pockets. I don't turn anything inside out or vice versa.

Why are you folding his clothes? Liberate yourself further and hand him his own clothes pile to fold while he is watching TV.


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## TinkerBelle (Jun 29, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mistymama* 
I can see how you feel that way, but I'm willing to bet your husband does not think about it like that. Some people are just forgetful - I can promise you I would have a hard time remembering to turn my shirts a certain way before putting them in the laundry. In fact, I'd rather just tell my hubby to fold them as-is or make a pile of my stuff and let me put it away before he made me remember to turn dirty laundry a certain way.









I grew up with a Mom who did stuff like this - and would get really upset over petty, small things. I swore a long, long time ago to NEVER EVER do a chore around the house if I was going to resent it. If I do it, it's because I want to - a gift of sorts. If I'm going to resent it, I'd rather leave it undone or ask for dh's help.

Seriously, life is way too short to be upset over something so small, with so many easy fixes.

Sorry if that sounds harsh, but I think you need to see the bigger picture here.


Let me clarify: I do see the "Bigger Picture" and I am aware that some people think it is no big deal.

To me, however, it is disrespectful.

Shirts being inside out, I don't mind too much. But picking up someone's underwear and unballing sweaty socks, to me, is just gross.

Thankfully, it has not been much of an issue with us.

I just tend to agree with those who think it could become a bigger deal.


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## Laggie (Nov 2, 2005)

I'm pretty lazy about laundry - and I'm also in the "no white clothing" camp... although I have this one cute little nightie that is white (I bought it as a costume) and there's no way I can wash it with my other clothes because I wear so much orange and red, it would come out pink for sure (I hate pink.)

The washing machine at my apartment is HUGE so I can't bring myself to put this one little white item in by itself - even on the lowest setting it would use a ridiculous amount of water.

Maybe I should bring it to a friend's house... I recently was visiting a friend and, after using a facecloth in the bathroom I asked if there was a hamper to toss it into. They proudly showed me their 7-section laundry sorting system. Wow. I thought my mom was Martha Stewart and she only did light and dark.

When I first started living with DH, he got mad at me for washing bright colours in with his blacks. I had *no* idea why that would be a problem... apparently he doesn't like orange lint on his black t-shirts. Oops.

Anyway. I think everyone has their little laundry pet peeves. Mine is using the dryer in the summer...

In some way, though, I guess that I think it's a little bit disrespectful if you tell your partner that something is a "big deal" for you and he continues to ignore it. However I also think it's reasonable for him to tell you that even if he tries, it's going to be difficult to remember that and that you should just leave them inside out. And, well, maybe I would save my "this is a big deal" option for something more important - like DP's habitual lateness.


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## GISDiva (Jul 13, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Belia* 
Am I the only one who doesn't do DH's laundry??









I haven't in 10 years. He has never done mine, either, except when I was so sick when pg.

When we got married, we figured that we are both grown-ups who had been doing our laundry for years, so why change??? He does his.... I do mine (and now the boy's)... so I could care less what he does with his dirty clothes.

Now I can't imagine doing it any other way.

Same here. People we tell think it's insane that I don't do all the laundry for some reason. He does his, I do mine, and we share DS's diaper/clothes laundry duties, when his basket is full, the first one who notices does his laundry. The only thing we don't share is the towels, I'm the only one who seems to notice that the towel bin is overflowing. And the shower curtain liner would walk off on its own volition if I didn't wash it every so often.


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## GISDiva (Jul 13, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *itsrtimedownhere* 
me - i guess the way i wash it isn't too bad, is it?
dh - i guess not..

haha that was the end of that little experiment.









:


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## ~PurityLake~ (Jul 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *cschick* 
I guess I'm just kind of confused as to how people don't end up with big enough loads to separate.

I wash once a week, and I always have enough clothing (with 3 people) for a full load of whites, blues/greens/beiges, and darks. And every two weeks for a full load of reds (and yes, I just let the reds sit in a pile until there's a full load).

I usually wash a load or two of laundry once a day or every other day. This includes washcloths, kitchen towels, blankets the girls have dragged around the living room, pillow case covers, cleaning rags, etc.

On another note, what if you come across a pair of pants that are halfway inside out. One leg in, one leg out. How does one fold or hang those without pulling the one inside out leg the right way 'round?


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## ~PurityLake~ (Jul 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Laggie* 
In some way, though, I guess that I think it's a little bit disrespectful if you tell your partner that something is a "big deal" for you and he continues to ignore it. However I also think it's reasonable for him to tell you that even if he tries, it's going to be difficult to remember that and that you should just leave them inside out. And, well, maybe I would save my "this is a big deal" option for something more important - like DP's habitual lateness.


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## inkslinger (May 29, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *CottontailKate* 
Your husband puts his shirts in the hamper?









ditto!


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## Storm Bride (Mar 2, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *GISDiva* 
Same here. People we tell think it's insane that I don't do all the laundry for some reason. He does his, I do mine, and we share DS's diaper/clothes laundry duties, when his basket is full, the first one who notices does his laundry.

This last is pretty much our total approach to laundry. I do most of it, just because I'm home all day. However, if dh happens to notice that one of our hampers is full, he'll throw a load in. He's better than I am for doing a load all the way through...except for the "putting things away" part. We both dump the clean, dry clothes on our bed. From there, if dh starts putting them away, he'll usually finish. I tend to take a "deal with three things" approach - any time I go into the bedroom, I put away three items. Then, when I go to bed, I take whatever is left and put it all away. (There are occasional times when I'm just too tired or not feeling well or something.) DH, otoh, will go up to bed, and throw any clean laundry on the toddler bed in our room. I find it frustrating, because I forget that there was a load, if it's not on our bed, and then I end up with 2-3 loads piled up.


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## eclipse (Mar 13, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *cschick* 

I wash once a week, and I always have enough clothing (with 3 people) for a full load of whites, blues/greens/beiges, and darks. And every two weeks for a full load of reds (and yes, I just let the reds sit in a pile until there's a full load).


I don't have enough white clothes in my whole house of 5 people to manage a whole load of whites, even if they were all dirty at the same time. I don't buy the kids white clothes, because they end up stained. We have socks (but usually, the kids and I don't wear socks. we're a sandals family. Dh wears them to work and sometimes I wear them to bed in the winter, and that's about it) and dh has a few white undershirts. I also try to wash everyday or every other day. If I have a lot of towels and washcloths, I try to wash them together. That's about the most sorting I do.


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## mommysarah5 (Jun 22, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Laggie* 
In some way, though, I guess that I think it's a little bit disrespectful if you tell your partner that something is a "big deal" for you and he continues to ignore it. However I also think it's reasonable for him to tell you that even if he tries, it's going to be difficult to remember that and that you should just leave them inside out. And, well, maybe I would save my "this is a big deal" option for something more important - like DP's habitual lateness.

I agree, and thats how it ended up working out for us. Lateness would not bother me at all, I think the shirts are more important lol. In fact a lot of things that would be "big deals" for most married folk have no phased me at all. It's those little repetitive things that bug me. Like a leaky faucet that drip, drip, drip, drip, drips in the silence of the night. That would bother me more then the whole sink blowing lol. Strange I know... but that's me for ya


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## mistymama (Oct 12, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *TinkerBelle* 
Let me clarify: I do see the "Bigger Picture" and I am aware that some people think it is no big deal.

To me, however, it is disrespectful.

Shirts being inside out, I don't mind too much. But picking up someone's underwear and unballing sweaty socks, to me, is just gross.

Thankfully, it has not been much of an issue with us.

I just tend to agree with those who think it could become a bigger deal.

To each his own. I choose not to live a milisecond of my life upset about touching dh's underwear. That's what washing hands is for.


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## FreeRangeMama (Nov 22, 2001)

I prefer to do the laundry because I have a system and it works. When dh steps in to do a load it totally messes up the laundry rhythm. My girls share a room and have their own hamper. My boys share a room and have a hamper. Dh and I share one, then one for towels, and one for diapers. (blankets get tossed downstairs to be done on that much anticipated-but rarely occurring- slow wash day). It goes girls, boys, us, towels, diapers, blankets (if we aren't overrun by dirty laundry). Repeat.

If it isn't in the hamper I don't wash it. Period. No exceptions. Even the toddler puts her dirty clothes in the hamper. I don't turn them, sort them, or deal with them at all. They go in the wash as they went in the hamper. I will put them away if I get around to it, but as far as I am concerned people should just be grateful it is clean.









There are 6 people (4 of whom are 8 and under) and a ton of laundry. I don't have the time to be searching for dirty clothes and washing it all separately. Once I started washing according to rooms it was so much easier, no more sorting through clean laundry to divide it up or anything. I also buy each child colour specific socks (one has all white socks, one has all black socks, etc).

It is a finely honed system which has cut my laundry time in half. And after many, many items have missed the wash due to not being put in the hamper even that is a rare occurrence


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## Everrgreen (Feb 27, 2007)

DH usually does his own laundry - but he has a *ton* of clothes, so it builds up. Right now he has 3 laundry baskets overflowing with dirty clothes. I pulled them out of the closet today because I could no longer even get into the closet. I think I may start doing it for him just so it's at least done and not sitting there.

As for the original issue - if I do happen to do a load for dh I don't turn things right side out, I will fold things as they are. Unless I'm in a really good mood, and then I will do it after it's clean while I fold.

Another pet peeve I have is that DH uses the dryer as an iron - it drives me nuts!!


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## Jackpackbaby (Oct 9, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Crystal_R* 
DH leaves a lot of his stuff inside out too. Now I just fold them inside out and if he says anything I tell him he's just lucky I washed and folded them at all










Hear Hear! I say the exact same thing to my DH. It took him 6 years for him to get me to wash his stuff at all (to my credit his clothes were NASTY as he was a lanscaper) so he is pretty good about keeping his mouth shut lol.


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## limabean (Aug 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *~Purity♥Lake~* 
On another note, what if you come across a pair of pants that are halfway inside out. One leg in, one leg out. How does one fold or hang those without pulling the one inside out leg the right way 'round?

I don't think the not-turning-things-right-side-out thing is a stubborn refusal thing -- in the case you describe above, of course most laundry folders would fix the leg of the pants so they could be folded neatly. It would be snide to fold pants with one leg in and one leg out -- the folder would probably be doing it more to make a point than simply because they don't care which way the clothes are turned.

To me, it just doesn't matter whether DH's (or my, or our kids') clothes are inside-out or right-side-out when they get put away, so I just leave them the way they were when they went in the hamper, unless something like you describe above happens (which is extremely rare), or I'm aware of a stain or something that needs to be treated on the outside of the shirt.


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## mommysarah5 (Jun 22, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *limabean* 
I don't think the not-turning-things-right-side-out thing is a stubborn refusal thing -- in the case you describe above, of course most laundry folders would fix the leg of the pants so they could be folded neatly. It would be snide to fold pants with one leg in and one leg out -- the folder would probably be doing it more to make a point than simply because they don't care which way the clothes are turned.

To me, it just doesn't matter whether DH's (or my, or our kids') clothes are inside-out or right-side-out when they get put away, so I just leave them the way they were when they went in the hamper, unless something like you describe above happens (which is extremely rare), or I'm aware of a stain or something that needs to be treated on the outside of the shirt.

yep. and honestly, even if there is a shirt or two inside out I would probably still turn them, but when half or more are inside out i am just not going to do that anymore. He doesn't seem to care, so why should I lol


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## TinkerBelle (Jun 29, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mistymama* 
To each his own. I choose not to live a milisecond of my life upset about touching dh's underwear. That's what washing hands is for.










Oh I have touched *everyone's* underwear in this house. I *will* wash them. I just don't think I should have to pick them up off of the floor when we have a basket and hamper and he is a grown up man.

Even my boys, ages 11, 10, and 4, pick up their own clothing and put it in the hamper. Yes, I do have to remind them, but they are children.

Grown people don't expect others to pick up after them.


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## mommysarah5 (Jun 22, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *TinkerBelle* 
Oh I have touched *everyone's* underwear in this house. I *will* wash them. I just don't think I should have to pick them up off of the floor when we have a basket and hamper and he is a grown up man.

Even my boys, ages 11, 10, and 4, pick up their own clothing and put it in the hamper. Yes, I do have to remind them, but they are children.

Grown people don't expect others to pick up after them.

I agree, at the very least its inconsiderate. If its someone's "job" to do laundry (which is already washing and folding their clothes FOR THEM) that is one thing, but you shouldn't have to go FIND the clothes, and picking up the floor has nothing to do with washing clothes.


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## alicia622 (May 8, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Belia* 
Am I the only one who doesn't do DH's laundry??









I haven't in 10 years. He has never done mine, either, except when I was so sick when pg.

When we got married, we figured that we are both grown-ups who had been doing our laundry for years, so why change??? He does his.... I do mine (and now the boy's)... so I could care less what he does with his dirty clothes.

Now I can't imagine doing it any other way.

We do our own laundry here as well! As soon as DS can learn to do his- he will be taking care of his clothes too


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## mistymama (Oct 12, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *TinkerBelle* 
Oh I have touched *everyone's* underwear in this house. I *will* wash them. I just don't think I should have to pick them up off of the floor when we have a basket and hamper and he is a grown up man.

Even my boys, ages 11, 10, and 4, pick up their own clothing and put it in the hamper. Yes, I do have to remind them, but they are children.

Grown people don't expect others to pick up after them.

I agree. Even my 6 year old puts his clothing in the hamper with reminders. I certainly don't go behind my husband and clean up after him 99% of the time. But if he leaves his boxers on the bathroom floor on accident - I'll pick them up.

In the overall big picture, grown man (or woman - I'm not perfect about always putting my things away either!) It's not something that would cross my radar to get upset about.

If he never put his stuff in the hamper or was really messy, I'm sure I'd feel differently. So maybe that's what you are talking about vs. the occasional pair of boxers or dirty socks left out.


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## mommysarah5 (Jun 22, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mistymama* 
I agree. Even my 6 year old puts his clothing in the hamper with reminders. I certainly don't go behind my husband and clean up after him 99% of the time. But if he leaves his boxers on the bathroom floor on accident - I'll pick them up.

In the overall big picture, grown man (or woman - I'm not perfect about always putting my things away either!) It's not something that would cross my radar to get upset about.

If he never put his stuff in the hamper or was really messy, I'm sure I'd feel differently. So maybe that's what you are talking about vs. the occasional pair of boxers or dirty socks left out.









I agree with this too. I don't nit pick. A pair of boxers here, an empty cup there, or a couple inside out shirts don't bother me. It's only when things are taken to extremes (like when my BIL lived with us, and left empty soda cans EVERYWHERE - even in closets??? and he would leave chokable items on the floor too. finally, after many requests for change cleaning up after him, I started throwing all of his stuff in a bag each day - garbage and "keepable" alike, and he could sort it out on his own later.


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## TinkerBelle (Jun 29, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mommysarah5* 
I agree with this too. I don't nit pick. A pair of boxers here, an empty cup there, or a couple inside out shirts don't bother me. It's only when things are taken to extremes (like when my BIL lived with us, and left empty soda cans EVERYWHERE - even in closets??? and he would leave chokable items on the floor too. finally, after many requests for change cleaning up after him, I started throwing all of his stuff in a bag each day - garbage and "keepable" alike, and he could sort it out on his own later.


Oh heck EVERYONE forgets from time to time. Me included. But, if it were a daily thing, I would not be a happy camper.


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## SuburbanHippie (Aug 29, 2008)

I had to laugh with the OP. I can sympathize. As for DH's white shirts, he keeps them right side out, BUT he also leaves them inside his work shirt (like he takes them off together, like they are one). So annoying! When I pull the white shirt out, the work shirt flips inside out and that makes me want to scream. So I totally feel you!


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## mommysarah5 (Jun 22, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *TinkerBelle* 
Oh heck EVERYONE forgets from time to time. Me included. But, if it were a daily thing, I would not be a happy camper.


You and I are operating on the same wave length thats for sure. Thanks for understanding!


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## Anastasiya (Jun 13, 2006)

I only read the OP but it made me chuckle.

I'm completely the opposite. ALL our shirts go in the laundry inside out, and I'm sometimes nagging at my hubby to make sure they ARE inside out.

(Turning them inside out for the wash keeps the colors looking brighter and nicer longer, and they don't get that worn-down look so fast).


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## orangefoot (Oct 8, 2004)

I haven't read all the replies but wouldn't undressing him yourself ensure your preferred right side outiness of the removed garment?


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## ~PurityLake~ (Jul 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *TinkerBelle* 
Oh I have touched *everyone's* underwear in this house. I *will* wash them. I just don't think I should have to pick them up off of the floor when we have a basket and hamper and he is a grown up man.

Even my boys, ages 11, 10, and 4, pick up their own clothing and put it in the hamper. Yes, I do have to remind them, but they are children.

Grown people don't expect others to pick up after them.


Quote:


Originally Posted by *mommysarah5* 
I agree, at the very least its inconsiderate. If its someone's "job" to do laundry (which is already washing and folding their clothes FOR THEM) that is one thing, but you shouldn't have to go FIND the clothes, and picking up the floor has nothing to do with washing clothes.









Men can grow up, too.


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## VisionaryMom (Feb 20, 2007)

I'm actually the one who doesn't turn my clothes right side out. I made DH demonstrate for me a few weeks ago how we takes his shirts off with them right side out without extra effort. It actually was pretty funny because he is so insistent that the clothes should go into the hamper right side out. He doesn't do all of the laundry. It's just his preference for when he is doing it, but I honestly don't think about it.


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## phathui5 (Jan 8, 2002)

Just wash them, dry them, and put them away. If he doesn't remember to flip them, don't even mention it. Just don't fool with it.


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## EFmom (Mar 16, 2002)

If something like this aggravated me, I'd simply let dh do his own laundry. He's got opposable thumbs and knows where the washing machine is located.


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