# 1-year old biting when hugging/kissing



## beckington (Mar 1, 2004)

Hi everyone

Not sure what to do about this - my son (1 year last week!) has just started biting us when he is giving us hugs and 'kisses' (big yummie sloppy ones







). He's bit my stomach, my neck, my shoulder, my cheek , and it hurts! He isn't doing it in a mean way - it just seems he gets carried away with the cuddles. What do I do? A few times when he's done it I've yelped OUCH (because it really hurts!) and he's looked a bit shocked, but then he'll do it again if given the chance. Of course when he's biten I don't put him back where he can do it again, but it's getting that when he starts giving me cuddles I get on edge waiting for the bite














'No' really doesn't work with him - he just thinks it is funny. Do I just assume it's a phase and he'll grow out of it? Or is this something I need to 'sort' now? (If he was doing it in a 'mean' way I'd be approaching it differently.)

Thanks for any advice

CHarmaine


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## kchoffmann (Aug 16, 2004)

I've known two other babies who bit when they "kissed." They were so overtaken with feeling, they couldn't help themselves. It doesn't sound fun, and I haven't had to deal with it personally, but I just want to take a moment to say, How cute is that when babies show so much passion?

I get, though, that you'd like it to stop. You might try showing him each time he's about to do it how to press hard with his kisses rather than bite. Model it for him, saying "gentle kisses." If he continues to bite, redirect the biting to something that won't hurt, like a stuffed animal or pillow. It seems like something you wouldn't want to punish -- he's just showing how passionately he's feeling.

Also want to note, him thinking 'no' is funny in this situation isn't necessarily the worst thing since you don't want to punish him, and you might be able to use it to your advantage. My DS used to put out his finger to touch the nipple after nursing, and I said, "No touching" before covering the nipple. He thought that was funny, but he also got that I only said it as he moved his finger toward the nipple. Eventually, he came to associate "no touching" with putting his finger in the air near the nipple, and he lost all interest in actually touching it. He'll still sometimes put his finger near my nipple just to hear me say "no touching." Maybe there's something similar you can do with that.


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## mamalex (Mar 2, 2004)

My 11mth ds is biting me too! I've noticed he does it most when he's very tired. He bites and laughs. I've tried "no," "ouch," "that hurts,"...he still thinks it's funny and I have to move him away. My left shoulder has little bruises on it! Earlier he was biting, so I nursed him and put him to bed. Interesting enough, he doesn't bite much when nursing (unless he's done.)


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## MamaE (May 1, 2004)

We went through biting around that age, and "no" didn't work at all in our case, though it sometimes does now. I think it works much better to tell them what you want them to do - I still struggle with remembering that, though! So, each time our dd bit us, we would say "kisses" and sometimes throw in a "biting hurts mommy". I know anytime we've been dramatic about something, it only encouraged the behavior we were trying to stop.







So, from our experience, easy on the drama, heavy on the positive discipline!


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## beckington (Mar 1, 2004)

Kerry said:

Quote:

but I just want to take a moment to say, How cute is that when babies show so much passion?
Yes, you are very right - it is very cute. Thanks - I needed to be reminded of that! What a sweet thing to say!

I haven't actually tried 'no' with him in this situation - I just know from other things that it just doesn't work and it turns it into a game for him. Cheeky little boy! :LOL

I'll try gentle kisses - we are working on gentle touch with the cats so hopefully he'll start to get the idea!

Hmmm, haven't noticed if he does it more when he's tired - I'll have to watch. He also doesn't bite when nursing - though he sometimes chews, youch







But I guess I should be thankful for no biting!!

Thanks everyone for the replies. It's good to know there's others out there with 'vampire' babies!









Charmaine


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## Ilovelife (Jun 6, 2004)

Dd has done that too, although maybe not as consistently as your little guy. At 19 months, she still does it occassionally. Like others, I've used "gentle kisses" and also say "Ouch! No biting. That's hurts mama!" Usually she stops when I say Ouch because it startles her (I say it is a high pitched voice). I don't say this sternly though, because I am *flattered* at how she gets carried away with kisses! HTH!


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## Alkenny (May 4, 2004)

Has he gotten new teeth recently? DS was biting everytime he came near me, but especially when he was "lovey". It only lasted a couple of weeks, but it was when some new teeth were coming in too.


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## lnitti (Jun 14, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Alkenny*
Has he gotten new teeth recently? DS was biting everytime he came near me, but especially when he was "lovey". It only lasted a couple of weeks, but it was when some new teeth were coming in too.

Exactly what I was gonna say. My dd is only 11 months, but when she is teething badly, she will bite me when we snuggle (she doesn't kiss yet).
I think she just snuggles in to get comfy and when she is comfy she suddenly bites me. She doesn't do it until she is snuggled into my body.


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## beckington (Mar 1, 2004)

Ah, new teeth - yes, we have those. Possibly that has something to do with it. Oh, that would be great - because then I'm thinking when he gets used to his new teeth he'll get over the biting and stick with the kissing (I loooooooooooove kisses







)! Of course, it could just mean everytime he gets new teeth he'll want to investigate their use by biting...

Cheers!!

Charmaine


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## Alison (Feb 11, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MamaE*
So, each time our dd bit us, we would say "kisses" and sometimes throw in a "biting hurts mommy". I know anytime we've been dramatic about something, it only encouraged the behavior we were trying to stop.







So, from our experience, easy on the drama, heavy on the positive discipline!

This is exactly what we had to do. DS did this at just about the same age. He has outgrown it, for the most part, but we still sometimes remind him, if he looks like he's getting carried away or overexcited, that "kisses, not bites, kisses". He would bite the cats too, so we also talk about being gentle, "gentle kisses, no biting, just gentle". Like others have said, there was no malice in the biting, just getting carried away with the kissing and cuddling.

You know, all the talk of gentle must have stayed with him. I woke up in the middle of the night last night with DS stroking my arm and saying "gentle, gentle, gentle".

Alison


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