# 12 yr old son broke big screen tv- WWYD?



## xmenmommy (Nov 6, 2007)

Our 12 yr old ds broke another family member's 60 in big screen tv at a family gathering. He was playing video games w/ his 6 yr old cousin and he hit the screen w/ a game controller.

He feels horrible about it, and we assured him that we understand it was an accident. However, we (his dad and I) need to replace (or repair, depending upon the extent of the damages) the tv immediately and we'll need to find money from savings to try and do this.

This happened last nite and we said we could talk about it after school today, as it was emotional last night when this happened. I think we should have him do extra jobs around our house to help earn money, and he has about $100 in his savings account that he was saving for a gaming system of the same type! We're also thinking that he should stay away from video games on the computer until he's earned enough to replace or repair this relative's tv.

He can still use the computer for school work and email, just not video games. What experiences/ideas can anyone else share?


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## Dana Hoffman (Nov 2, 2007)

Do you or the other family have home owner's insurance? That covers accidents like this. Then you and your son would only have to cover the deductable...

Dana
unscholing mama to Lauren, 15, Otto, 9.5, and new little one due in May!


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## mamahart (Sep 25, 2007)

Wow. I've never had that happen...and I have a tendency to believe that in those situations we self-correct or punish pretty intensely. I would take his savings to help pay and get him to earn money at home and probably not take away the video games but give strict time limit???? We don't do video games but children are so sensitive and tender when they really screw up accidentally. They usually screw up enough on purpose!! Be compassionate, put yourself in his shoes.....GOOD LUCK!


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## DBZ (Aug 9, 2005)

Did he throw the controller at the TV?

Not to long ago my oldest broke my other childs gameboy in anger. She was also stealing money from me to buy extra food at school. I had her use her allowance ($5/week) to cover the cost of it. If it weren't for the stealing, I wouldn't have had her pay back the entire amount.


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## xmenmommy (Nov 6, 2007)

_Did he throw the controller at the TV?_

He was playing the Wii (??) system with the game controllers in hand and swung at the tv during a tennis game.

He was standing about 18 in from the tv when it happened because my ds had moved all the family room furntiure to make a fort structure. It was poor judgment to stand less than 2 ft from the tv and swing his arms. He said he understood he was too close but he was having fun and didn't think he would hit the tv if he was careful!


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## sun-shine01 (Aug 9, 2002)

We're also thinking that he should stay away from video games on the computer until he's earned enough to replace or repair this relative's tv.

I don't think he should be punished for an accident. He's taking responsibility by helping to pay for the TV.


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## MillingNome (Nov 18, 2005)

Reconsider letting him play video games while he earns the money to pay the replacement cost. It was an accident and he's trying to make it right. Why heap it on? Also, ask the homeowners to look into using homeowners insurance if possible.


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## MillingNome (Nov 18, 2005)

And to add:








to MDC!


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## onlyzombiecat (Aug 15, 2004)

I think having to pay for the TV repair/replacement is enough as it was an accident.
I wouldn't take away video games because of it. He already feels bad and is trying to pay for it. Taking away video games is overkill.


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## Organicavocado (Mar 15, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *xmenmommy* 
_Did he throw the controller at the TV?_

He was playing the Wii (??) system with the game controllers in hand and swung at the tv during a tennis game.

He was standing about 18 in from the tv when it happened because my ds had moved all the family room furntiure to make a fort structure. It was poor judgment to stand less than 2 ft from the tv and swing his arms. He said he understood he was too close but he was having fun and didn't think he would hit the tv if he was careful!

I knew it would be a Wii. LOL, even with the wrist strap on, I have managed to throw the controller at the TV twice, and I whacked the cat a good one on accident once. He was mad at me for a very. long. time.

I wonder about homeowners insurance as well. What a bummer for your DS, and you! Just wanted to offer some sympathy.


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## xmenmommy (Nov 6, 2007)

Thanks for the advice everyone. I'll talk w/ my husband first, then when we sit down as a three-some to talk this evening, I think we'll let him know that as long as he'll willing to take on some extra jobs around the house to help w/ the cost, the video games will still be around as well.

Since we have 4 boys (12, 3 yr old twins and 1 yr) I know this is just the beginning. Oh my....


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## UnschoolnMa (Jun 14, 2004)

Him offering to help pay for repairs is a very thoughtful option if you are all comfy with that.

Quote:

We're also thinking that he should stay away from video games on the computer until he's earned enough to replace or repair this relative's tv.

He can still use the computer for school work and email, just not video games.
I don't see any value in that at all. What purpose would it serve?


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## UnschoolnMa (Jun 14, 2004)

And that's what I get for not reading all the way before posting LOL

Glad to see you found a resolution that works for you all.


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## Arduinna (May 30, 2002)

You know that system has caused a decent amount of damage due to it's design, stories like this are pretty common. I personally wouldn't blame him for it. It was an accident. If he had intentionally thrown the controller in a fit of anger that would be different.


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## mommyof3andcountin (Mar 11, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Arduinna* 
You know that system has caused a decent amount of damage due to it's design, stories like this are pretty common. I personally wouldn't blame him for it. It was an accident. If he had intentionally thrown the controller in a fit of anger that would be different.

ITA, but I don't really think OP is blaming, but helping her child take responsibility for his actions.

I vote for help pay for the TV, but not take away his video games or whatever since it wasn't a deliberate act.


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## hanno (Oct 4, 2006)

Totally an accident brought on by a stupid game design. Maybe have him pay half and don't let him buy a Wii. Him feeling bad is more than punishment enough.


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## Stinkerbell (Aug 11, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *onlyzombiecat* 
I think having to pay for the TV repair/replacement is enough as it was an accident.
I wouldn't take away video games because of it. He already feels bad and is trying to pay for it. Taking away video games is overkill.

ITA.


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## enkmom (Aug 30, 2004)

I would never punish anyone for an accident, and I like your solution. It never seems to end - we just helped buy a new Nintendo DS for my dd's boyfriend. DD is away at college, and accidentally swept it down off a lofted bed when she grabbed her coat. She didn't have a spare $130 around, so we funded her to replace it immediately. I can only imagine how your son must feel breaking a TV! Poor guy.


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## JillChristina (May 24, 2004)

And if you want to make your son feel better (let him know he's not alone in his accidental distruction), check out this site:

http://www.wiihaveaproblem.com/

Good luck!







Jill


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## Bellejar (Oct 2, 2005)

Dana Hoffman said:


> Do you or the other family have home owner's insurance? That covers accidents like this. Then you and your son would only have to cover the deductable...
> 
> Their insurance premiums would go up if they filed a claim. I would feel bad asking.


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## menudo (May 21, 2002)

I am hearing about so many tv's broken due to Wii's..and my Mom got DS one for Christmas... Uh oh.


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## sporty (Nov 2, 2005)

Bellejar said:


> Quote:
> 
> 
> Originally Posted by *Dana Hoffman*
> ...


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## Marsupialmom (Sep 28, 2003)

I would make him pay for it but that is it. I would also help him understand a few adults have made the same mistake. Did these Wii remotes have the strap on them. If not then it is partially their fault.


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## PancakeGoddess (Oct 8, 2004)

The strap has to be adjusted snugly around the wrist to work at all. Personally I think they should have a velcro wrist strap. OP, I think having him help pay it off but not removing the games is good, as others have mentioned.

Fellow mom of 4 boys and wii owner,
Amy


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## mommy68 (Mar 13, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mamahart* 
I would take his savings to help pay and get him to earn money at home and probably not take away the video games but give strict time limit????

I agree.

Video games aren't played in our house often at all, maybe 1-2x per year. But when they are they aren't played for long, always a time limit.

Did your son throw the controller at the t.v. on purpose? If not, then how one earth did a small controller damage a t.v. that big without any force being put behind it? That seems odd to me. I have a 12 yr old and at that age they are usually a little more responsible than that. I could see my 5 yr old causing damage like that but not my almost teen son.


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## UnschoolnMa (Jun 14, 2004)

The wii games are very interactive and require big sweeping player gestures for game play. The controller has gone flying in many cases with players young and old from what I hear.


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## Mama Dragon (Dec 5, 2005)

Those Wiis are dangerous







I wouldn't punish him at all, just have him help pay, extra chores for a couple weeks to pay you back or something.


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## mamalisa (Sep 24, 2002)

When dd was learning how to walk she got hit in the head with the stupid Wii controller more times than I care to admit. I think you've come up with a fair solution, helping to pay for it.


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## GooeyRN (Apr 24, 2006)

It was obviously an accident. He did not mean to break the tv. I would have him do extra jobs around the house to help pay for it, and I would take his money from savings. That would teach accountability, even if it was an accident. If we run a red light and cause an accident, we have to pay the damages to any other car(s) involved, even if we didn't mean it. However, I would NOT restrict his gaming since it was an accident, and not intentional. If we purposly threw the controller at the tv, that would be a totally different story. We generally do not loose our drivers licenses for first infractions that were not intentional (intentional being a dui or severe speeding) or whatever.


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## Sage_SS (Jun 1, 2007)

I agree with him paying for the repair. And most of whats been said so far.
Its for this exact reason that we hooked our Wii up to our old TV, set up in the play room. Its a system that was designed to get people off the couch.. why would it make sense to put this in a livingroom? Would you put a ping pong table in your livingroom?
It think because it is a video game system, most people don't think much about it, but its a different kind of gaming system, therefore requires a different kind of area to be played in.
Accidents happen all the time, no one is to blame, but lessons are to be learned.


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## Blu Razzberri (Sep 27, 2006)

I second the insurance coverage idea.

I'm a little upset at your original post and how you didn't mention it was an accident.







: If I hadn't read more of the thread, I wouldn't have known that. _Suggesting solutions for an accident is far different than suggesting solutions for something he did purposely_.

The Wii is a known disaster (I don't have a Wii, OR cable TV, and I know about it!!). The odds are pretty good that your relatives (the one with the broken TV) already knew about that. Did their remote have a strap? If not, why havn't they followed through with the recall (issued by Nintendo) and gotten one? If it did have a strap, you need to write to Nintendo about it still being a problem.

The other thing is -- half the cost of a broken big screen TV is overwhelming for ME; I can't imagine you making your 12 year old cover half of that!! Maybe $100/$200...but you're talkin' like $500, maybe more!! That's going to take him a very long time to come up with!!!


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## ediesmom (Nov 19, 2001)

hate to be a bugger, but where is the homeowners responsibility? To not have them claim it because their premiums will go up is outrageous. That is why they have insurance, so when teenegers come over and play games with a known history of just this type of accident in front of their oversized television and the accident DOES happen, then they can get their money back. Split the deductable. Sorry, but your relative knew the risk. I think its HIS lesson to learn.

Your son sounds like a wonderful, stand-up young person who doesn't deserve to be screwed because of a premium increase.

sorry, but its a bit disturbing that the relative is so, well.................


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## gassadi (Dec 22, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ediesmom* 
hate to be a bugger, but where is the homeowners responsibility? To not have them claim it because their premiums will go up is outrageous. That is why they have insurance, so when teenegers come over and play games with a known history of just this type of accident in front of their oversized television and the accident DOES happen, then they can get their money back. Split the deductable. Sorry, but your relative knew the risk. I think its HIS lesson to learn.

Your son sounds like a wonderful, stand-up young person who doesn't deserve to be screwed because of a premium increase.

sorry, but its a bit disturbing that the relative is so, well.................









:


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## onelilguysmommy (May 11, 2005)

didnt read all of the replies...but did they have the replacement strap for the controller? they had this happening and had a replacement thing.. i was going to say maybe it wasnt his fault at all. not that i think it was, but i mean so maybe he wouldnt ne thinking "if i hadnt swung it as hard" or something, kwim?

i dont know what i would do, though because wow, a 60" tv is expensive!! yikes!


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## Oonah (Jul 28, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ediesmom* 
hate to be a bugger, but where is the homeowners responsibility? To not have them claim it because their premiums will go up is outrageous. That is why they have insurance, so when teenegers come over and play games with a known history of just this type of accident in front of their oversized television and the accident DOES happen, then they can get their money back. Split the deductable. Sorry, but your relative knew the risk. I think its HIS lesson to learn.

Your son sounds like a wonderful, stand-up young person who doesn't deserve to be screwed because of a premium increase.

sorry, but its a bit disturbing that the relative is so, well.................

I don't see where anyone is getting screwed here.....
if it were my tv accidentally broken in this situation I would not ask the child and his family to foot the entire repair bill
BUT
no way would I submit a claim for that and risk increased rates and possible non renewal if I had a more serious claim (sorry I don't consider a broken tv serious). My neighbor was dropped after two relatively small claims....and being dropped is the kiss of death....no way would I risk it or ask anyone else to. Claims stay on your record for 5-7 years I think....just like a credit report and it follows you...other insurance companies will know your claims.


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## ediesmom (Nov 19, 2001)

I am standing by the 'known risk' statement, however unpopular. If the owner of the ginormous tv doesn't want it to fall under his insurance, he should reduce the risk involved.

Knowing he has insurance, if I were the OP, I would ask his deductible and offer to have my son pay for his half (?) of the responsibility. Whether the relative claims it or not.

I do want to say again how impressed I am with the maturity of this young person. OP, you have obviously raised a wonderful person.


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## Novella (Nov 8, 2006)

Bellejar said:


> Quote:
> 
> 
> Originally Posted by *Dana Hoffman*
> ...


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## Meg Murry. (Sep 3, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *xmenmommy* 
Our 12 yr old ds broke another family member's 60 in big screen tv at a family gathering. He was playing video games w/ his 6 yr old cousin and he hit the screen w/ a game controller.

He feels horrible about it, and we assured him that we understand it was an accident. However, we (his dad and I) need to replace (or repair, depending upon the extent of the damages) the tv immediately and we'll need to find money from savings to try and do this.

This happened last nite and we said we could talk about it after school today, as it was emotional last night when this happened. I think we should have him do extra jobs around our house to help earn money, and he has about $100 in his savings account that he was saving for a gaming system of the same type! We're also thinking that he should stay away from video games on the computer until he's earned enough to replace or repair this relative's tv.

He can still use the computer for school work and email, just not video games. What experiences/ideas can anyone else share?

I think your plan makes sense. You're having the consequence fit the offense as well as possible given that he's 12. I'm glad you're doing that. I don't really have much to add beyond that.


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## Bellejar (Oct 2, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Oonah* 
I don't see where anyone is getting screwed here.....
if it were my tv accidentally broken in this situation I would not ask the child and his family to foot the entire repair bill
BUT
no way would I submit a claim for that and risk increased rates and possible non renewal if I had a more serious claim (sorry I don't consider a broken tv serious). My neighbor was dropped after two relatively small claims....and being dropped is the kiss of death....no way would I risk it or ask anyone else to. Claims stay on your record for 5-7 years I think....just like a credit report and it follows you...other insurance companies will know your claims.

I had an accident this week, where I put my car in neutral instead of park and it rolled into our garage door. I am not reporting this to my homeowners. It will be about $1300 out of pocket - because I am worried about nonrenewal. Insurance companies suck. No doubt about it.


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## Blu Razzberri (Sep 27, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Meg Murry.* 
I think your plan makes sense. You're having the consequence fit the offense as well as possible given that he's 12. I'm glad you're doing that. I don't really have much to add beyond that.









:







:







:

But it was an ACCIDENT....that's why I said it needed to be specified in the original post that it wasn't on purpose. Why punish for something he didn't do on purpose?? He needs to help repair the damage (because accidents happen and it's best for him to be prepared for that possibility in life and figure out what he's going to do about it); but on the same token, the owner of the TV needs to bear more responsability. I think your family is responsible for half the cost; and they're responsible for the rest. Like I said, they had to know about the 'dangers' of the Wii; and they should have acted accordingly.

If he threw something at the TV on purpose; it would be different.


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## ediesmom (Nov 19, 2001)

and since there IS insurance.......half the cost should equate to half the deductible! A child should not have to pay half the price of such a luxury that holds insurance.

Really, if his premiums go up maybe he will learn a lesson.......maybe a board game would be more fun for all?


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## mamazee (Jan 5, 2003)

I think his responsibility is the amount of the deductible. If they choose not to claim it because it's not in their best interest, that's their choice, but I don't think it's fair to make him pay it all because they don't want to use an available means of paying the rest.


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