# 12 year old diagnosed with phimosis, please help.



## Goddess3_2005 (Oct 20, 2004)

I am at a loss as to what to do. My 12 year old was diagnosed with phimosis. He said his forskin ballons when he urinates and is very painful. The urologist gave him a steroid cream that has had minimal effect and now we are looking at having a circ.







I am really sad for my son and he dosen't want surgery, could someone please help?


----------



## Yulia_R (Jan 7, 2006)

Ballooning is 100% normal. Urinating can be painful during separation since the ballooning can create small tears in adhesions (while the boy urinates). Not retracting until much later is 100% NORMAL. Steroid scream should NOT be used on kids, it's for ADULTS who failed to retract. I think the only problem with your son is his DOCTOR (if I were you I'd fire him right away and found a foreskin friendly ped who will NOT manipulate his foreskin in any way).


----------



## MyBoysBlue (Apr 27, 2007)

Isn't there a different type of operation that can be done for adults with this problem. A diagnosis of Phimosis isn't an automatic circ. There is some sort of cut that can be done to widen the opening. For an ADULT. A child of 12 has a few more years of letting nature take it's course before anything needs to be done if it doesn't resolve itself. Like Yulia said the pain can be from separation.


----------



## Goddess3_2005 (Oct 20, 2004)

So I screwed up? Oh no. Dose anyone know a good peidiatric urologist in the Phoenix area?


----------



## dancindoula (Jun 20, 2005)

Check out the Doctors Opposing Circumcision website for lots of information about this. Also you can contact them personally and they can either give you some help online or direct you to foreskin knowledgeable doctors in your area.

Don't beat yourself up! You were just following directions. It's your ped who ought to be ashamed of himself for being so ignorant about such an important subject. Just leave it alone now that you know and tell your son to rinse it with warm water in the shower and leave it alone too.

Look at the links listed at the very top portion of this forum too - there are some really good articles on phimosas and appropriate care.


----------



## Yulia_R (Jan 7, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Christine_T* 
It is odd to hear that it hurts - the foreskin is supposed to balloon.

It's not always the case, some boys do and some do not (both are normal). Some can balloon only for a short period of time, usually due to a forceful retraction or internal tears caused by smegma build up working its way out (this was the case with my son, he ballooning for a month or so afterwards until foreskin reattached back to the glans). In this case, if left alone (as it should) foreskin will most likely reattach back to the glans and ballooning will disappear.

My son had a very visible (even through his foreskin) smegma build up. One morning he woke up with very swollen penis and he wouldn't pee because it was hurting badly. I made him a warm bath, he sat in it for some time then eventually I told him to pee in the water which he did (evidently it was less painful peeing in warm water) and when he did I saw that his urine came out together with lots of white clots of smegma. Right after that he started ballooning badly (which of course was normal; any time he peed his penis would become like a ball lol). It was obvious that the smegma build up tore some adhesions under the foreskin in order to make its way out and this was causing ballooning.
I made him warm baths three times that day and each time he peed you could see some smegma coming out together with urine.

The ballooning slowly got less and less visible (as foreskin was reattaching to the glans) and soon it was completely gone. My son is almost 4 now, with no signs of ballooning or retracting. Which is fine with me







he will retract when it's HIS time.


----------



## Mama2Jesse (Jan 5, 2009)

It's beginning to separate... can be a bit painful for a time.
Warm water rinses, maybe even try urinating with his penis submerged if it's that unpleasant.
Kudos to you, mom, for not blindly following an ignorant doc!







:


----------



## tutucrazy (Dec 30, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Goddess3_2005* 







So I screwed up? Oh no. Dose anyone know a good peidiatric urologist in the Phoenix area?

You don't need a urologist. Nothing is wrong with your son's penis. Only 50% of boys are retractable by age 10. It is normal for a boy to not become retractable until after puberty. Phimosis CAN NOT be diagnosed on a child!

You need to leave him alone. Steroidal creams should not be used on children as children don't have the hormone level to keep a foreskin widened. Hormones are what aids in widening the opening of your son's foreskin. Puberty should resolve the issue as his hormone levels will increase.

The pain he is experiencing is probably normal separation. As adhesions break there can be some raw areas on the glans that sting for a few days. No one should be trying to retract him. This causes micro-tearing and results in more pain as the urine will sting the tears. Forcible retraction is a direct cause of acquired phimosis in adult men as it causes scar tissue.

As others have said, ballooning is NORMAL. This just indicates that the foreskin is separating from the glans however the opening has not widened. If you leave him alone the opening will widen with sexual maturity.

Please read these:

Development of a retractable foreskin in a child/adolescent:
http://www.doctorsopposingcircumcisi...kinleaflet.pdf

How to protect your intact son from foreskin-ignorant doctors:
http://www.mothering.com/articles/ne...uncircson.html

Avoiding Circ after the Neonatal Period:
http://www.nocirc.org/publish/pamphlet7.html
(THE ONLY MEDICAL REASON TO CIRC IS FOR FROSTBITE, MALIGNANCY, GANGRENE, OR SERIOUS TRAUMA)

Normal Separation:
http://www.mothering.com/discussions....php?t=764732?

Care of the Intact child:
http://www.mothering.com/discussions....php?t=1071893

Bottom line, stop seeing that doctor and let him develop naturally. If after puberty he is not retractable you can investigate a solution such as stretching or steroidal creams. Keep in mind that a small percentage of men never become retractable and as long as it doesn't interfere with intercourse there is not need to do anything. A non-retractable foreskin can be normal for some men.

btw, peeing in a cup of water is a good way to take the sting off as separation is happening.


----------



## Dave2GA (Jul 31, 2005)

There is a lengthy discussion of normal separation at www.cirp.org in the library section. Kayaba's study, published in the Journal of Urology in 1996 show that your son is not abnormal. There are still a lot of boys who aren't retractable at 12.

If you can get to DC I can give you the name of a prominent pediatric urologist who knows what he's doing. PM me if you want further info.


----------



## Fellow Traveler (Jan 8, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MyBoysBlue* 
Isn't there a different type of operation that can be done for adults with this problem. A diagnosis of Phimosis isn't an automatic circ. There is some sort of cut that can be done to widen the opening. For an ADULT. A child of 12 has a few more years of letting nature take it's course before anything needs to be done if it doesn't resolve itself. Like Yulia said the pain can be from separation.

The less invasive surgical option is sutureless prepuceplasty documented here: http://www.biomedcentral.com/1471-2490/8/6

Basically a few small incisions and it doesn't change the look or function of the foreskin. But I agree he may just not be ready yet.


----------



## Yulia_R (Jan 7, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *tutucrazy* 
You don't need a urologist. Nothing is wrong with your son's penis. Only 50% of boys are retractable by age 10. It is normal for a boy to not become retractable until after puberty. Phimosis CAN NOT be diagnosed on a child!

You need to leave him alone. Steroidal creams should not be used on children as children don't have the hormone level to keep a foreskin widened. Hormones are what aids in widening the opening of your son's foreskin. Puberty should resolve the issue as his hormone levels will increase.

The pain he is experiencing is probably normal separation. As adhesions break there can be some raw areas on the glans that sting for a few days. No one should be trying to retract him. This causes micro-tearing and results in more pain as the urine will sting the tears. Forcible retraction is a direct cause of acquired phimosis in adult men as it causes scar tissue.

As others have said, ballooning is NORMAL. This just indicates that the foreskin is separating from the glans however the opening has not widened. If you leave him alone the opening will widen with sexual maturity.

I 100% agree! Your son does NOT need a urologist; just get a foreskin friendly ped who will not make up problems where they don't exist. Your son is just fine.


----------



## Goddess3_2005 (Oct 20, 2004)

Thank you all. I just panicked when he was crying because it hurt so badly for him to urinate. I didn't know what to do. I will look up a foreskin friendly doc who can help us more.







: Thanks!


----------



## PuppyFluffer (Mar 18, 2002)

Remember too that the hormones of puberty have an influence in the separation process. There are two comonents here, one is the foreskin's attachment to the penis and the other is the stretching of the prepucial sphincter. The ability to fully retract the foreskin depends upon both of these things maturing. It is perfectly normal for one to be ready and not the other.


----------



## Quirky (Jun 18, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jwhispers*
The less invasive surgical option is sutureless prepuceplasty documented here: http://www.biomedcentral.com/1471-2490/8/6

Basically a few small incisions and it doesn't change the look or function of the foreskin. But I agree he may just not be ready yet.

But I wouldn't even think about this for a ten year old. I think the best course of action is just to leave it alone.

If it really continues to bother him, he can do stretching exercise -- just gently pulling the foreskin away from his body, as much as is comfortable. Google Beauge method and it will have instructions.

Don't worry! As PPs have said, "phimosis" is actually NORMAL at this age and completely non-pathological. The mistake is not anything you've already done, it would be going forward thinking something is the matter and looking for something to treat rather than just letting nature take its course.

Urologists in this country are woefully ignorant about the normal penis. Most have no clue about the foreskin's structure and function, or about the normal development of the intact penis. Their training -- and knee-jerk reaction -- is going to be to recommend circumcision, because all they know about the foreskin is how to cut it off.

I wouldn't even bother seeking a second opinion, because you're likely to get more of same.


----------



## tutucrazy (Dec 30, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Goddess3_2005* 
Thank you all. I just panicked when he was crying because it hurt so badly for him to urinate. I didn't know what to do. I will look up a foreskin friendly doc who can help us more.







: Thanks!

When my son's foreskin separated he was in EXTREME pain. Usually if it separates all at once it hurts worse b/c the glans are very raw. Imagine urine passing over a wound. My son took about 4-5 days for his glans to smooth over and the pain to be gone. Now he balloons all the time but there is no more discomfort. The discomfort for your son may come and go until the foreskin is entirely separated from the glans. After that the skin on the glans will smooth over and he won't feel any pain. The ballooning is actually a good thing b/c the urine will keep the foreskin separated until his opening widens and he becomes retractable. The urine also helps rinse out any dead skin cells.


----------



## MCatLvrMom2A&X (Nov 18, 2004)

Sounds like puberty is kicking in and doing its job. To help with the pain have him pee in a glass or bowl of water. If he is able to retract any have him pull back to just past the urenary opening on the glans so that the urine dosnt go back up under the foreskin.

Right now is the time to talk to him about retraction and how his "messing" with things can help the process along. Ballooning happens when the foreskin has released from the glans but the sphincter at the tip has not loosened yet (that will happen as his hormones kick in)

Tell him that stretching will help the process he should gently try to retract but not to the point of pain. Make sure to tell him not to force things because that can cause the foreskin to become trapped behind the glans that is called paraphimosis and can be a difficult fix.

This link has helpful tips about the retraction process and how to sooth any irritation as well as a link on paraphimosis http://www.mothering.com/discussions....php?t=764732?

You are not at fault here at all mama







it is the Dr's who still are not up to date on intact care.

If he is nearing 18 and still having issues with none retractale foreskin then he can use the steroid cream but like others have mentioned it isnt for younger boys.


----------



## Goddess3_2005 (Oct 20, 2004)

Oh Jeez, well he's been using the cream for a month. Well at least he still has his foreskin! I did call the Doc against circ and they are helping me now. Thank you all, you are super mamas!







:


----------



## MCatLvrMom2A&X (Nov 18, 2004)

I am so glad you are getting help from Dr's who actually know about the intact penis.

Dont worry about using the cream it wont harm him it just wont do what the dr meant for it to do.


----------

