# Suddenly very clingy 17 month old



## susanmary (Nov 28, 2012)

Hi all,

I'm hoping for some reassurance here. My son turned 17months a few days ago. For approximately the past 2 weeks he has become very very clingy to me, old fears have also re-emerged (e.g. the sound of the vacuum cleaner), and he is requesting to nurse almost constantly throughout the day unless he is very distracted. It was only 3 weeks ago when I was commenting to my husband about how independent he was becoming. Just wondering if anyone else has experienced this and whether it is (hopefully) a phase?
Thanks, SM


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## Asiago (Jul 1, 2009)

It could be a growth spurt. Clinging, irritability, needing more food and sleep than usual are signs.


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## susanmary (Nov 28, 2012)

Possibly Aslago. Thanks. Hopefully!!


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## LLQ1011 (Mar 28, 2012)

My son is doing the same thing and just turned 17 months. I even told my dh a few weeks ago how independant he was.


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## susanmary (Nov 28, 2012)

Really!! Wow! I wonder if it's a developmental thing ... a "wonder week" or weeks where they are making a mental leap? Or a growth spurt like the PP mentioned. It's a bit disconcerting to say the least!

How are you responding there? So far I'm going with it as calmly as i can, but it is very intense and I'm certainly not finding it easy. I try to keep him distracted when possible. So far my only rule is no nursing when mummy's eating. This rule caused a huge meltdown 2 evenings ago, but he's accepted it without tears since.

Oh I do hope it's a phase :-D


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## LLQ1011 (Mar 28, 2012)

I am just following him. Its mostly nursing a million times at night. I also trybto confine him to his high chair ifnhe is eating and god forbid let him watch baby einstien so ibcan maybe wash dishes that are becoming a biohazard.


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## skycheattraffic (Apr 16, 2012)

My DD went through a huge clingy/separation anxiety phase around 18 months. Then as suddenly as it started, it was over. She's 25 months now and gladly stays with my MIL while I go to my prenatal appointments. At 18 months, she would barely tolerate staying with daddy while I ran to the pharmacy.


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## susanmary (Nov 28, 2012)

Thanks so much for sharing Skycheattraffic... Hope! :-D


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## sassyfirechick (Jan 21, 2012)

We're there/hopefully on the tail end. Started around 16.5 mos, the week before we started in ISR lessons, so she has been lesss than thrilled to be in a pool with a stranger (even though she loves her teacher and talks happily about her all the time outside of lessons!) and now at 18mos is still slightly more reserved than in the past but is getting better about going to DH and not pitching a fit for me and throughout had never changed her attitude around people she knows well - friends and family - just not happy about new people and always asking for mommy!


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## susanmary (Nov 28, 2012)

Soooo interesting. 16.5m was our changing point too. Delighted for you PP that your DS has passed through the most intense part.

I don't think any of my friends with same aged kids are experiencing the same behaviours as us, but I've heard other behaviours mentioned around this age. I wonder if our experience of "the clingy-ness" is related to our kids particular temperment. My son is definitely a sensitive soul and has been very high need particularly in terms of sleep since the very beginning.... Just a thought..,


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## wendizbaby (Jul 22, 2005)

Just wanted to add that we are going through this too and my ds turns 18mo tomorrow. It started about 3 weeks ago and is just as you ladies are describing. It's got a tiny bit better the past few days, but is still difficult. What an exhausting phase!!


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## susanmary (Nov 28, 2012)

It certainly is! I really look forward to being on the other side of this phase! Any time alone for longer than 3mins seems absolutely impossible / not worth the distress right now. It is reassuring to know we are not alone though! Hugs!!


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## sassyfirechick (Jan 21, 2012)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *susanmary*
> 
> I wonder if our experience of "the clingy-ness" is related to our kids particular temperment. My son is definitely a sensitive soul and had been very high need particularly in terms of sleep since the very beginning.... Just a thought..,


I do think that comes into play. As tough as my daughter is physically, she's very sensitive and emotional and was a SUPER needy/fussy baby. She's absolutely horrible with teething too. She can fall down and get a black eye (did this twice already), cry for less than 30seconds and go about her business, but get her cutting some teeth and she is just an absolute hot mess! So when the clingy phase started I wasn't incredibly surprised and we're working through it. Last night we both cried in bed from about 3am to just after 5 when she finally fell back asleep - the plus side of that is she finally cut a damn tooth and has 3 left to have a full mouth and we're done for a while!!


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## LLQ1011 (Mar 28, 2012)

Thank god for this thread, i am touched out, nursed out, exhausted, my house is a mess. Rough phase. He is also really teething. I am right there with you sassyfirechick.


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## susanmary (Nov 28, 2012)

We are teething on top of it all as well! My brain seems to be shutting down ... Earlier today I was on the phone to a shop sales assistant and said "love you" as I said goodbye!!! There are numerous other examples. I can't trust what comes out of my mouth! Hehe :-D I've become soooooo dizzy!


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## susanmary (Nov 28, 2012)

Tough night SFC! So glad the tooth has come through! No joy here yet and he only has 8 so far.

Hi LLQ...strength in numbers!


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## wendizbaby (Jul 22, 2005)

Teething here too! I think my ds was stuck to my boob the entire night...I was in and out of consciousness and every time I woke up he was latched on. I try not to drink coffee too much, but I've been drinking 2 cups now every morning just to get going!


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## LLQ1011 (Mar 28, 2012)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *wendizbaby*
> 
> Teething here too! I think my ds was stuck to my boob the entire night...I was in and out of consciousness and every time I woke up he was latched on. I try not to drink coffee too much, but I've been drinking 2 cups now every morning just to get going!


I have been eating too much junk trying to stay awake.


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## susanmary (Nov 28, 2012)

Whatever gets us through ladies! We could be ingesting much worse ;-D

Two teeth have appeared on the top right here! Last night was a bit better.

He's still very clingy during the day, but the past 2 days he has requested to nurse slightly less throughout the day (he's pretty much usually an all night nurser).... so that's sort of heading in the desired direction.

Roll on this phase!!


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## Vermillion (Mar 12, 2005)

17mo old here too! Very independent typically, but has been all about Mama for about a week now. Clingy, whiny, all that fun stuff. He's getting molars & canines right now, and having massive developmental stuff going on... speech exploding, etc. I think we're heading into a wonder week, too, gotta check the book









My sympathies, Mama!


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## wendizbaby (Jul 22, 2005)

So today I went back into my old posts and found that I was complaining about the exact same thing at the exact same time with my first son who is now 7! I attributed it at the time to a move we had recently done, but I guess that wasn't the case. It seemed to clear up a bit shortly after 18 mo.


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## susanmary (Nov 28, 2012)

Wonder weeks and teething combo! Our poor little ones really. I'm finding it very helpful to focus on the fact that ..."this too shall pass"! Being outdoors saves my sanity also mamas.


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## sassyfirechick (Jan 21, 2012)

Outdoors IS a sanity saver! DD took a nap the other weekend on the grass/blanket while I washed my car, guess she was lulled by all the neighbors mowing lawns


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## Vermillion (Mar 12, 2005)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *sassyfirechick*
> 
> Outdoors IS a sanity saver! DD took a nap the other weekend on the grass/blanket while I washed my car, guess she was lulled by all the neighbors mowing lawns


Totally. We've been spending most days out of the balcony just hanging out. Those days are much easier!!


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## LLQ1011 (Mar 28, 2012)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Vermillion*
> 
> Totally. We've been spending most days out of the balcony just hanging out. Those days are much easier!!


LMAO! Looks like I am cleaning the balcony tomorrow


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## susanmary (Nov 28, 2012)

:-D


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## DylansMama12 (May 18, 2013)

My son is 16.5 months and we've had these phases on and off for the last few months. It is typically teething with some developmental stuff thrown in and a dash of separation anxiety. I just try to roll with it and survive til bedtime lol.


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## susanmary (Nov 28, 2012)

Other mums in the same boat ... How are you doing? I think we have a tiny bit of improvement here, just tiny really, and he certainly seems to have gone through a mental leap as we've now most certainly joined terrible two territory where he is realising that he is his own person but unfortunately for him he can't always get his own way. Rollercoaster days here!


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## LLQ1011 (Mar 28, 2012)

I agree I think its mental. He now is saying more words and more clearly. Also bed time is getting easier. He is also sitting in his high chair eating happily without me in eyeshot. I think it might be getting better. Also agree on the rampaging. He is decided destruction must occur at least twice an hour. My poor sliding glass door blinds.


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## Momma Michael (Jan 23, 2013)

18.5 month old here taking his momma on a rollercoaster ride too...
I attribute my situation to cutting 4 teeth in 2.5 weeks (2 canine and 2 incisers)! I am also a bit of a hormonal mess so it is a positively challenging time.
Hugs and patience to you all.


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## wendizbaby (Jul 22, 2005)

I thought we were getting better...then yesterday he nursed all day. I kept telling him that there was nothing left...I was completely dry.  Then last night, he wouldn't sleep until 10:30 (bedtime is 7:30) and he just nursed and nursed and nursed! Weirdly enough, today I couldn't get him to nurse!! I was actually engorged this evening and I was around him all day. We've got teeth coming in still, but his mental leaps are obvious. His word comprehension is growing by leaps and bounds the last two weeks. I feel like he understands nearly everything I say to him now.

Hang in there, mommas! I like that we are all in this together.


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## susanmary (Nov 28, 2012)

And you! Hugs and patience!!!

Teething night here again last night... 2 incisors... so he was latched on most of the night and awake from 2:30 to 5am! Teething is pretty unbelievable! It feels so unfair! 

Unlike your LO right now LLQ1011, since this recent leap my DS has started trying to resist bedtime. It's very new for us as he nurses to sleep and was usually lulled to dreamland quite easily this way.

Oh, a nice saying for you all: "Hang in there mama- you can do it. Just remember what is most important to you at the end of the day"- k.m. Berggren

And TG for chocolate!


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## susanmary (Nov 28, 2012)

Hi all, just getting back to you to share that ...in our case...it was a phase. He's still in the wars with teething but the intense clingy-ness during the day has passed. Thank you to all who gave support and advice at the time. Hope you and your LOs are well,  SM


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