# I just want



## locksmama (Jun 7, 2007)

to sleep.






















is it so wrong? I dread sleep every night and hate the nightwaking sleep bed time routine.
I am losing my mind here and near the breaking point.


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## Valkyrie9 (Sep 29, 2006)

I'm sorry you're having a rough go, mama. It's really hard and I sympathize so much for you. It'll get better--I know that's not a lot of reassurance right now, but there's also the aspect that you're helping your child create a healthy attitude toward sleep.


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## DreamsInDigital (Sep 18, 2003)

Just







Nighttime parenting can be so hard. I've got a cold, baby's got a cold and is getting 4 teeth and I have three other children, so I totally know what you mean. I just want to sleep too.


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## locksmama (Jun 7, 2007)

I bought the no-cry sleep solution..i hope it works. I'm really going to snap..I can feel it. My dh had to take Viv because I was so mad that she kept waking herself up tonight and just wouldn't sleep...gotta go she's screaming with him I can hear her..








there's no end is there?


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## D_McG (Jun 12, 2006)

if you tell us more, maybe we can help.

let's think about wake/sleep times. nap times. sleeping environments (alone or not).

Allergies, milestones.

I know it's a lot and 9/10 the answer is "it's a baby" but sometimes we can modify things to make everyone happier.

eta: 6 mos was really bad for us and was my turning point!


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## locksmama (Jun 7, 2007)

We wake up at about 8am everyday unless the night was really long. We read, potty, and play all morning. She usually then gets tired and takes a nap at about 10:30 only for about a half hour. Later she'll take another nap either at 12:30 or 1 for maybe an hour--usually 30 to 45 mins though. Then at about 2:30 or 3 she will take a mega nap for two maybe three hours.
My dh gets home around 6 and we feed her a solid at about that time. At about 8 she wants a boob and then takes a mini nap for about 20 mins or so.
We quiet everything and dh gives her a bath around 9 or 9:30. We then dim the lights and put lullabies on the computer and he hangs with her while I get ready for bed.
Then we bring her to bed and she gets excited for a booby which she gets. I turn out the light she nurses and then..(she used to go to sleep and I'd go upstairs)...she wakes herself up and I get up and turn on the soft light. Then we read her bedtime books (softly) while she is on her potty (we ec). She then either goes into her crib to wind down or I lay there with her until she cries and gets tired wherein she will finally nurse down and go to sleep. If I get up she wakes up often and so I end up staying with her and falling asleep. Then she wakes up about 5 times or more (I haven't kept track yet) a night needing to nurse to go back to sleep.
It's not even the nightwakings that kill me though they do, its the never spending time with my husband at night and the whole starting at 9:30 and not sleeping until 11 routine and not being able to sleep without me that bothers me. I'll start to get tired and she wakes up and I get really mad. Its irrational anger but it is there nonetheless. This really didn't start until 4 months when we got rid of the nipple shield and I started nursing her in bed to go to sleep. I used to nurse her on the boppy until she was asleep and then lay her down and go upstairs....that ended.
As far as allergies, I have avoided eggs and dairy as they bother her. She has no other symptoms. I'm a near vegan anyway because I can't process meat or dairy myself....
I'm going to start keeping the nap logs, the pre bedtime routine logs and the nightwaking log today.


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## Julian's Momma (Oct 25, 2006)

Hugs!!! I remember feeling the same way when my DS was that age. He was the worst sleeper. BFing all night for what seemed like months on end. Just hang in there. Feel good knowing that you are doing what is best for your baby who is just trying to develop a sleep pattern and figuring things out.

My DS was the worst sleeper and I never would have believed that it would pass, but it does! Hugs!


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## babymaggie (Nov 11, 2007)

I totally understand. DS is the same way. He is almost 11 months old and things are just starting to improve (God only knows for how long, lol). Anyway, what strikes me about your post is the late bedtime of your baby. Have you tried putting your LO down earlier? I have found that 6:30-7pm works best for DS. Any later and he ends up sleeping worse and waking more. We start bedtime routine at 5pm with supper, then a bath, then a story, prayers, nursing and bedtime. We also recently started to put him in his crib for the first part of the night since he moves around too much to be safe in our bed and also because he seemed to be too restless in our bed. It is going very well so far. Also, I know that you EC, but it is possible to have a last potty time before the beginning of your nighttime routine? I don't EC myself, but it seems to me that interrupting the cuddly routine to get up and go potty would disrupt sleep and waken your LO even more.
Sorry I can't be of more help. But don't worry -- it will get better over time.


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## locksmama (Jun 7, 2007)

I know that the bedtime is late but my dh doesn't get home from work until 6pm and we are just wanting to give her some time with him. She says in the no cry book that 9+ pm is too late and that they wake up more and so on as you say and I really believe it. I just can't get my dh on the same page with the earlier bedtime yet....
As for pottying, she wakes herself up to read after that initial nurse and cuddle, so I just take the opp to put her on as about 25% of the time she poops after she nurses at that time anyway. I think she'd wait though if the chance were not there cause she is good about that.
The other factors hitting me now are that we are buying a house and will most likely move in Feb, AND, I'm having a myomectomy in April...so someone other than me has to be able to put her to sleep at night and for naps for at least a minimum of two nights ya know? We just have to break the nurse to sleep association so she'll go down for other people in other ways. I don't mind nursing her before sleep, just not so that is the only way she will sleep! My dh isn't comfortable having her next to him because he sleeps so deep...so he wants to start to move her into her crib when we move into the new house so she'll be ready for when I have surgery...he wants to sidecar it to the bed and slowly move her out....sheesh it's a lot to consider on no sleep








I don't even know where to begin. I'm just trying to survive right now. I want my dh to read the section of the book on sleep solutions so we can formulate a plan together instead of it just being me doing it.....I'm way overwhelmed and its just one baby!


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## locksmama (Jun 7, 2007)

oh yeahand did I mention that my parents came in this weekend and so the sleep logs have been pointless to try and keep? She has been sleeping a wee better at night but the whole nap scene has gotten way worse as in no naps but maybe one for an hour or so....arghh!
And of course my mom thinks I should let her cio because that's what they did with me and look I turned out fine. I asked her how long it took and she said only a month..a month!!! she said I would cry and then wait to see if she would come in, then I would cry again hard and once I figured out she wasn't coming I'd go to sleep...a hour or so of crying like that every night. I told her we weren't doing that with Vivian and that we'd figure all of this out without her crying. My parents just don't think a baby crying it out is a big deal..they think it's ridiculous what we are doing...of course I was also bottlefed....anyway that was real not fun dealing with this weekend on top of the sleep issues themselves...


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## misseks (Jan 12, 2005)

Yah me too.









I'm spent.


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## marzanmama (Oct 10, 2007)

I agree that the bedtime is too late. When she has that fourth little power nap at 8pm--I think maybe she would benefit from that turning into naptime.

Maybe you could highlight the part from NCSS where she talks about that? If you had an 8pm naptime, dh would still get two hours with her.

Perhaps you could convince him to try an earlier bedtime by sharing this pearl of wisdom: Happy wife=happy life. Lol.


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## Magali (Jun 8, 2007)

It will get better! I know how you must feel about dreading the night time. I was there a couple of months ago. But Ds has stopped waking up as frequently now.


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## babymaggie (Nov 11, 2007)

I totally understand about you and DH wanting him to spend time with her. My DH works a lot -- he is gone from 7:30am to 10:30pm three days a week and from 7:30am to 6pm the other two, home on weekends. When DS was a newborn and I really didn't know what I was doing, he would go to bed with us around 11pm. I thought it was important for him to spend time with his daddy as well. Believe me, seeing how that turned out, I quickly saw that it was a better idea for him to sleep better so we changed his bedtime. I discovered through trial and error that approximately 6:30pm was his best bedtime which was later confirmed by NCSS. More sleep=happier baby=happier mommy=happier daddy. DH is now on paternity leave (heaven!) and can spend more time with DS. But that's beside the point. I think you should sit down and have a serious conversation with your DH about what is best for your LO. Being totally sleep deprived is not what is best! They can spend time together on the weekend.
As for having someone else be able to put your DD down, I can't help there as DS refuses anyone but me at bedtime.







: But I have heard that making daddy a part of the routine in a slow way helps. Maybe you can try that? If he comes home at 6pm, maybe he can give her a bath or be with you when you read and then slowly transition so that he is the one who holds her and reads to her after you have nursed her. I don't know... In any case, hang in there. I was told many times that only time would improve things and that it would eventually get better. It was the last thing I wanted to hear -- I wanted a magic solution as all of us do -- but really, I am finally starting to see tiny little improvements. You will too.









Oh yeah, I also wanted to say that it seems to me that you are wanting to make an awful lot of changes at once -- moving, going to a crib, changing the nighttime routine... If possible, I would make as few changes as possible. My experience is that they tend to do better with fewer changes at once. Good luck!

Emily


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## Pandme (Jan 31, 2007)

I just have to laugh at Pantley's blanket no-bedtime-past-nine rule. She clearly hasn't met my kid. We tried to put him down early a few times....when we get him down by eight, he's up at ten, twelve, so on and so on. So one night, we tried seven-thirty. He got up five times....before midnight. Twelve times total the whole night.

Contrast that with what happens when he goes to sleep at nine or ten...he will sleep three or four hours and be up maybe only three times a night, nursing back to sleep pretty quickly.

For us, earlier bedtime just means waking up earlier. I have no idea why it's supposed to make kids sleep longer and better because we have seen NO results with it.


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## SublimeBirthGirl (Sep 9, 2005)

I feel your pain. Almost as soon as my 1st started sleeping well (19 months) I had another (well, she started sleeping well early in my 2nd pregnancy). My 2nd is 16 months and doesn't sleep worth a crap. Nothing works.


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## Mom2Joseph (May 31, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Pandme* 
I just have to laugh at Pantley's blanket no-bedtime-past-nine rule. She clearly hasn't met my kid.

oh my yes. I have heard this for months from a dear friend of mine who swears by it. However, a 7 or 8pm bedtime means a 1 or 2 am wakup time - FOR THE DAY!

The only thing that has helped us is no more TV (DH uses this) and eliminating food allergies.

Do whatever you can to get some sleep. I know the resentful feeling and it's not fun. Once you get some rest you can deal better.

Hugs mama...


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## Meems (Jan 8, 2007)

mine either. if she goes to bed b/f 9pm she's up at 4-4:30a WIDE awake. that doesn't work for me. my rockstar parties till 10-10:30 and then sleeps till 8 or 8:30 w/ a few (or five!) nursings!









all i can say is listen to your baby. i really tried the early bedtime thing and my babe just doesn't go for it. we wait until she's tired and put her to bed.


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## readytobedone (Apr 6, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Pandme* 
I just have to laugh at Pantley's blanket no-bedtime-past-nine rule. She clearly hasn't met my kid. We tried to put him down early a few times....when we get him down by eight, he's up at ten, twelve, so on and so on. So one night, we tried seven-thirty. He got up five times....before midnight. Twelve times total the whole night.

Contrast that with what happens when he goes to sleep at nine or ten...he will sleep three or four hours and be up maybe only three times a night, nursing back to sleep pretty quickly.

For us, earlier bedtime just means waking up earlier. I have no idea why it's supposed to make kids sleep longer and better because we have seen NO results with it.

yeah. if DD goes to bed before 8 (and i mean even 1 minute before 8:00), she treats it as a nap, wakes up an hour or so later and stays up for HOURS. as long as she goes to bed after 8:00, she still wakes, sure, but goes right back to sleep with nursing or settling. so we do everything possible never to put her down before 8:00.

maybe pantley's thing is usually right, but it's not always right.


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## locksmama (Jun 7, 2007)

the whole not taking naps thing is out of control too. I think it's because she is six months and there is just too much to see and do now to sleep...at any rate I know she gets tired between 6:30 and 8 so we are probably going to shoot for a bedtime around there if she is tired.....we can try it right? it can't get worse...or can it? I think we will move the pottying and books to before we go in to bed as was suggested above.
Once the plan is formulated I think it will be eat, bath, relax with lullabies and walking around, and then nurse down and ppo (if it works). If this fails it fails but trying is important I think.
I've been nursing her to sleep and coming upstairs again the last few days which has been relieving things a bit. She stays asleep about an hour or so before she needs me to nurse her back down . She has also been nursing less time and rolling away by herself so there is a bright spot here...also last night my dh finally came downstairs and helped me get her to sleep without the boob..I had nursed her three times and she was restless still so I let her play until she was tired as usual only this time we pated her and said nighttime shhh until she finally went to sleep. It took every bit of resolve not to just grab her and nurse her down again (I knew she'd sleep that time..the biological urge was overwhelming...) it was really tough to watch her root and roll and fuss a bit while we patted her and talked her to sleep--yikes it was so so so hard!! but it was way easier with dh there to help for a change so we are definately going to work him into the routine more.
I also agree that too many changes will be too much but again my dh just doesn't get it.








at any rate I'm surviving


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## locksmama (Jun 7, 2007)

well I really think she is tying to kill me or force a mental breakdown. I'm actually beginning to not feel bad sometimes when she cries when she gets tired because its her own damn fault for not staying asleep for her nap!!!!!!!!! I actually get mad and consider cio just because I simply need SOMETHING to work.
God help us both today as its really rough.


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## MartysMommy (Dec 29, 2005)

Hang in there locksmama! I hear your pain! I have had a few days like that too lately! When ds#2 won't nap- i go insane! And when ds#1 won't nap- I am a crazy woman! I get so angry at them! I shout "you have no idea what a luxury it is to be napping in the middle of the day! Some day you'll wish for naps during the day!" But they jsut stare at me blankly- or cry! Ugh!
ds#2 is 8 months and the days he won't nap I feel like letting him CIO too because he had every oportunity to nap!

It will get better some day...

I always feel a good guilt trip makes me realize how lucky I am to have 2 healthy boys and that soem day this will all be forgotten!


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## locksmama (Jun 7, 2007)

I could easily put her in Ergo on my back and she'd take a nap but that's just it...I need some away time with her napping and me either cleaning or napping or on here or I don't know what! I've been thinking of just letting her play and then from now on most of the day just strapping her on and going about my business. At leas she would nap in the ergo....I'm wondering if she's teething or something as she is really shoving eerything in her mouth and massaging her gums a lot with her fingers. there's no sign of teeth or swelling gums though....well, must go back and lose my mind again!


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## PPK (Feb 15, 2007)

Ugh, I'm in the same position as you. As far as naps are concerned try to swaddle her..I know she's a bit old to start this, but you may want to give it a shot. I posted some pics a while back on how to swaddle an older babe:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/[email protected]/

scroll to the bottom and work your way up...I loaded them backwards. hth. If ds isn't swaddled he sleeps half the time he would if he was swaddled, he's 4.5 months


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## Narn (Nov 7, 2007)

My girl is three months old. She doesn't nap very much during the day. Her bedtime is 9 or 10, the same time my husband and I go to bed. She usually can't sleep without me. So... why not try less naps during the day, and a later bedtime if the reverse isn't working? I have found that letting my baby sleep whenever she feels like it, and not sleeping when she doesn't works best for her. But I am lucky that she sleeps at night. I nurse her before she has a chance to wake up (we co-sleep) so she stays asleep for a long stretch. During the day, though, she might sleep for 15 mins or a half hour at a time, but only two or three times throughout the day. Why should she nap more than that if she doesn't want to?


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## locksmama (Jun 7, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Narn* 
My girl is three months old. She doesn't nap very much during the day. Her bedtime is 9 or 10, the same time my husband and I go to bed. She usually can't sleep without me. So... why not try less naps during the day, and a later bedtime if the reverse isn't working? I have found that letting my baby sleep whenever she feels like it, and not sleeping when she doesn't works best for her. But I am lucky that she sleeps at night. I nurse her before she has a chance to wake up (we co-sleep) so she stays asleep for a long stretch. During the day, though, she might sleep for 15 mins or a half hour at a time, but only two or three times throughout the day. Why should she nap more than that if she doesn't want to?

because mommy needs the time to regain sanity that's why! and because she can get pretty nasty if she doesn't nap. it's not like I'm trying to force something here, she tarts the nap and when I move her from the booby to the swing, all of sudden now she just wakes up. She didn't used to do that! also, with the general sleep deprivation I have I would like to nap at the same time on the couch nearby...
You know I was a ok with our routine 3 months ago too--it sounded much like yours. Then I started seeing my dh less and less cause she needed me downstairs to be able to sleep, then came 4 months and the sleep bump. On top of that came ditching the nipple shield at the same time and the time change on top of it all. My lc got us into nursing her down in bed and now she can't sleep without the boob. Throw it all together and you have our current situation.
You might experience the same crap so just be careful the systems and habits you are setting up for yourself....at any rate thanks for the advice all the same as I appreciate you and everyone else taking the time to respond to my insanity.


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## LogansMama1979 (Nov 8, 2007)

I know what you mean. My son is 4.5 months old, and he sleeps a good half hour and then wakes screaming. We rock him back to sleep, and if we are lucky, he stays down. He has stopped taking the full 6 ounce feedings (I couldn't breastfeed.. long story) and so he is up every three to four hours. I shouldn't whine- if we can't get him to sleep we end up taking a drive. I feel right on the edge too- it is so frustrating and I don't know what to do anymore myself. I know we will get through it though!!!







All in good time...


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## DaytonsMom (Aug 25, 2007)

i feel your pain. ds won't sleep without me in bed with him(we co sleep) and most of the time he has to be attached to my nipple or lying on my chest. i finally just decided that it was more importnant for me to stay with him than try to get stuff done. now he takes a morning nap in the ergo while i do dishes and vacuum and etc and then his afternoon nap we lay in bed. if he starts to wake up which he wakes up at least 8 to ten times a night then he can just nurse back to sleep for a second. it was hard at first to not feel bad about doing other things that needed to be done but as always he comes first and if i want to sleep i can sleep with him at nap time if not than i'm on the laptop online. usually here. can you try cosleeping during naps since you wouldn't have to worry about your dh then? Have you talked about cosleeping and night and just keeping her on your side of the bed. then he wouldn't have to worry about sleeping too deeply. someone once told me that you are still aware even in your sleep. they said think about it how often do you roll off the bed, you still know where the edge is even while your asleep. this really helped my dh with that fear. anyway this turned into a long post, but that's what worked for me. i finally just brought him to bed because i was so sleep deprived, and it worked! if only i had those first months back!


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## Narn (Nov 7, 2007)

.


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## Narn (Nov 7, 2007)

Yeah, can you nap with her in the bed? I wouldn't have gotten any sleep from day one if I hadn't done that.

And please don't think I am criticizing. I have been through sleep deprivation, and it's no joke. And I don't get much done during the day, either. Sometimes I can't eat or even make dinner (because I won't cook with her in a carrier.) I just assumed not getting anything done was part of being a mom. I'm just making suggestions. Co-sleeping really helps.


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## Narn (Nov 7, 2007)

.


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## Narn (Nov 7, 2007)

.


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## Narn (Nov 7, 2007)

.


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## Narn (Nov 7, 2007)

:.


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## locksmama (Jun 7, 2007)

since I do that all night I just really want some time not with her for my own sanity. I know we are doing the attachment parenting, but it is not wrong to want to detach sometime is it?
and I wasn't offended or anything Narn don't worry..








at any rate we are slowly moving bedtime earlier and she is responding well!! that is once she is down anyway! my dh is finally coming in and helping with the sleeping process at the beginning of the night and now for the past two nights she has pulled herself off the boob, fussed a little, checked to make sure daddy and mommy were there, fussed some more, and then went to sleep. I had to slowly work my way out each night but at least she has gone down!!!!!!!!!!!she seems to nighwake less too and she seems to be trying to put herself back to sleep w/out the boob which is unbelievably encouraging to me. All because my dh got involved and helps her go to sleep...the naps are still trouble though as in maybe three and each one only 30 mins usually on me only....it is exasperating! I have wondered if the swing is distracting her and maybe its time to switch to the pack and play for naps....
well thats the news...


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## galincognito (Nov 23, 2007)

i feel for you locksmama. my dd is 6.5 months and also barely naps (2-3 naps of 15-30 minutes each in a twelve hour period). most days i don't know how we make it through as i am also on the brink of insanity; she becomes cranky and whiny and i have yet to figure out what will console her. i wish i had some helpful suggestions but i'm hoping that knowing that you're not alone will provide at least a tiny bit of encouragement. one thing that has helped my sanity a little bit is when dh is home and dd has been fed, dh can take care of dd so i will run an errand; even just getting out of the house for a few minutes by myself can clear my head (at least for a couple of hours). take care.


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## nylecoj (Apr 24, 2007)

Locksmama,

I just wanted to add that months 4-9 were horrendous in our house. Dd was awake every 45 minutes to 1.5 hours for four months solid with the exception of a handful of nights.

The hardest part for me was feeling like my parenting style was creating bad habits or making her incapable of self soothing to sleep, and from your posts it sounds like this might be bothering you too. (i.e. nursing down, etc.)

We still co-sleep and nurse all night and sometimes she sleeps great (5+ hours in one stretch!) and sometimes, like recently, she's up 12 times a night and is completely inconsolable.

My point here is that given the many changes in her sleep patterns I can neither take credit for a great night, nor blame myself and my choices when she has what seems like infinite difficult nights. (Despite what most of my friends/family think)


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## locksmama (Jun 7, 2007)

what makes no sense is at night after she has nursed like 3 times and is exhausted but won't go to sleep and then commenses to cry even though I am right there. Tonight, my dh isn't here and she is just crying right next to me no matter what! So what is the difference if it is alone or right next to me? Nothing is consoling her! Why is it so hard to go to sleep? Why all the crying???????


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## heidirk (Oct 19, 2007)

Honestly BTDT and have three t-shirts! SO hugs to you and do not give up!

I know it seems like you are losing ground, but you've made huge progress!

Why all the crying? She's trying to figure it out right along with you. She knows you need her help, and it sounds like she's trying, and probably very frustrated too.

DS is 18 mos! I can't beleive we survived this long! We've been so sleep deprived we were both hallucinating, and I am not exagerating in any way. I'd look out my kitchen door and see people walking around on my porch and then I'd look again and they were gone! It was so scary!

But things have improved so much over how it was when he was 5-9 or so months. Don't give up!


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## michellis (Jan 7, 2007)

I've never posted in this forum before, so hope you don't mind me jumping in here--my firstborn was very much like your daughter. I was so sleep-deprived for the first 8 months, it was unbelievable. But now having had 2 more boys and experiencing the difference with them, I think I would have tried a few things differently with my first.

#1 I would have taken him for craniosacral and/or chiropractic treatments as early as possible. I think that alone would have helped him sleep better. I did do this with my 2nd. His first chiropractic adjustment (very gentle, just looked like touching his spine with intent) was at 4 weeks, after which he slept for about 3 hours--in the middle of the day. He was much calmer in general than his elder brother and slept soooo much better both at night and during the day throughout babyhood. Did the same with my 3rd. He slept great at night and during the day also. (by great at night, i mean he only woke up 3-5 times/night to nurse instead of every 30 min. to an hour like my oldest did)

#2, I wouldn't have been so quick to nurse my first whenever he was unhappy. I know this doesn't sound very AP, but my personal experience is that when my 2nd and especially my 3rd came along, I didn't always have the luxury of nursing them when they got tired and became fussy. Maybe one of the olders was on the toilet, or wanted something to eat, or the 2 olders were fighting--you know? And what I discovered, to my amazement, was that the baby would fall asleep by himself after a few minutes of crying (in his co-sleeper), while I was dealing with whatever the current crisis was in the other room and stressing about hurrying back to take care of baby. Now, I have a sling, and an Ergo baby carrier, and co-sleep with each baby until a new one takes his place (so far, a little after each turns 2 yrs old). I'm no advocate of Ferberizing, or cry-it-out. But I do think there is a difference between a baby's need to release some pent-up energy by crying for a few minutes before sleeping and the crying of abandonment, pain, etc. When I was a new mom, I was always second-guessing myself--what does that cry mean? And in my misplaced love for my son, I think I stuck the boob in his mouth often when he just needed to cry for a few minutes before crashing.

I noticed that with each of my boys, somewhere between 9 and 12 months, whether they had been sleeping well or not up to that time, they would begin to cry at night and at naptime when left alone--and this was a different cry, the "I'm all alone and I really really need you cry." So I would change our pattern until they were comfortable going to sleep by themselves, by lying down with them. For example, my eldest was ready to go to sleep by himself, without us even in the room, by the time he was 3. My 2nd is 4.5 and still needs someone to lie down with him or he freaks. But he knows that we leave the room after he falls asleep and is okay with that.

Oh, lastly. #3 I would have used homeopathics much more with the 1st one if I had known about them. My favorites are: chamomilla, boiron's homeopathic teething blend, and boiron's homeopathic colic blend. I now keep these in my nightstand right next to the bed. If a baby/toddler wakes up crying inconsolably, these are my first 'ammunition'. They have worked amazingly well with my boys. I have often wished I could have a video camera rolling--they go from screaming their heads off to deep sleep within a matter of seconds of squeezing a few drops of the homeopathic into their mouths. What a gift to tired mommies...

Well, hopefully some of this rambling can help you some,
Michelle


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## LogansMama1979 (Nov 8, 2007)

I know what you mean! We, too, are nearing the breaking point. Then what? Then you're broken and you're still tired. I truly hope it gets better for you.


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## locksmama (Jun 7, 2007)

The thing of it is, once she's down now with he earlier bedtimes, she has been sleeping longer with less night-wakings. After she zonked last night at 9:30 she slept until 12am! She only woke two more times until she got up for the day. That is actually really amazing for her.
You think that would help my sanity right? for some reason it hasn't. After I posted that last night I snapped and yelled at her. Then of course she was quiet for a second and then yelled louder so I brokedown crying and rocked and walked her and patted her back while we both cried and I went on the worlds worst guilt trip. I couldn't believe I yelled at her. I NEVER yell at anyone...wow it was sooo depressing. it still is...
It's like the witching hour or something that time of night. If she cries a ton and keeps waking up and fusses and all of that I simply can't take it. I think it's because at that point I just really need a break. When my dh is not there it is way worse for both of us. He calms her down and we just tag team her to sleep. He won't be there again tonight so of course I am dreading sleep....not to mention this nap strike is killing me. I JUST DON"T GET IT! She falls asleep and as soon as I try to transfer her she wakes right up.
On a differing note I wanted to thank everyone for their commentsand support as I really appreciate all of it.








Also thanks Michelle that post helped..


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## locksmama (Jun 7, 2007)

week two of the nap strike...all of this is seriously making me not want anymore kids. I'm not joking. if this is how it is going to be then forget it.








Sometimes I wonder if everyone is right. Everyone around me is telling me that I'm spoiling her and now of course she can't sleep
without you or without being walked--see I told you so they will say. I get no sympathy from anyone because not one of my friends is doing co-sleeping or has done it, or is doing the AP thing like us.My best friend said last night "well you'll have to live with your choice since you won't let her learn to sleep by herself and she's getting old enough to know how to get what she wants and that is what she is doing." The advice I get is to leave her in a room with her lovey and music and leave. "after four days or so of crying she'll just go to sleep on her own everyday". The person who said this has 4 kids and they all sleep at night except the one she co-slept with.
Last night my dh wanted me to just leave her in her p&p and "see what happens--just wait 5 mins." I told him I know what will happen, she will start out whimpering and it will get worse until she hyperventilates (sp?)
That's what happened and when he got her she was doing the hard to breath thing and looking everywhere for me. Just doing this once will make her clingier than before and her sleep last night sucked.
I can't go on like this. She has to nap somehow or I'm going to have a breakdown. Her crying actually makes me mad now not sympathetic.







So I end up letting her fuss and cry more than I would which just makes her more clingy.
She only gets a total of 7 hours of sleep nighttime and daytime combined everyday. That's half of what she needs.
I might have to just take her downstairs and start napping her like I put her down at night I guess. I didn't want to do that but desperation may just have to rule here.
I actually emailed E. Pantley to get advice.....
HELP


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## Hesperia (Sep 3, 2007)

I didn't have time to read everything, I got to the end of page one, talking about late bed times. She is power napping at 8pm, which 'should' be bedtime for the night....but it doesn't work for all families of course.

I think that you DH getting less time with baby and more time with you (and helping you find sanity) is more important right now. Also, if you look at your DD cues, she is most likely ready for bed at something to 8, and getting her up longer for time with daddy might be throwing your whole night out of wack. I think keeping her up that late for daddy time, isn't respecting her and giving her a fair chance at sleep.

Weekends, morning, whenever...you can mush in daddy time!

Anyways, I'm sure you've gotten some great ideas and whatnot. Also, if your DD can relax without a bath at night try giving her one in the afternoon, so she can use that extra free 30 mins at night with some one-on-one with daddy, or get him to do the bathing in the evening....etc.

Okay, hope everything works out well. I'm sure it will. You sound liek you are doing great!!


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