# NEW: at & over 40 with little ones Tribe UPDATED



## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Hey Everyone - This is such a great thread it just seems like it's getting super long. It started in 2004 WOW!! So I thought I'd see if there's any interest in a new thread







Hope that's ok with everyone.








:







:







:

Let's share a little about ourselves (name/age) and our LO's and I'll keep us all updated







: with info here...sound ok? I also checked out the other earlier thread for discussion topics. Education and difficulties/successes with being an older parent were two I saw, also older moms wanting to TTC again in their 40's. So we'll see how it goes and hopefully this thread will last a few years too









*AT & OVER 40 with LO's TRIBE MEMBERS*

*lovbeingamommy* *Kate* - *44* DS 3 yo and two babies in heaven. TTC #2 in April '09 (hoping Apr. 25th is a miraculous day with a BFP)

*mammal mama* -*44* Lover of Jesus, Wife to Dude, SAH Unschoolin' Momma to Roo 4-25-00, Boo 3-10-05, and at least one precious Soul in Heaven.

*chattie67* *Julieanne* - *40* SAHM and have a DS that's 20 and a DS that is 10 months

*mamasgroovin* - *40* I have 4 kiddos...ds1 is 16, ds2 is 12, ds3 is 7 and dd is 3.5...so I do not have any SUPER little ones, but quite the spread. I have been a SAHM for 16 years now.

*yankeeterrier* - *45* DS almost 9M, WAHM with a website for maternity, infant and childrens resale items and a hyena cart store for cloth diapering items. I am cloth addicted!

*Kira's mom* - *Hali* - *47* Dd 5 1/2

*salt_phoenix* - *Julie*

*PassionateWriter* - *40* Due in October # children ages 17, 10, & 2.5

*2goingon2* - *Janet* - *40* Mother of 3; expecting 2/09

*ricemom3* - *Muriel* - *43* married with 3 kids - ds 17yo, dd 14yo, and ds 1yo

*Jezzy* - *Sharun* - *40* I have 1 ds 15, 2 dds #1 is 13 and #2 is 7 mo

*MCR* - *Pauline* - *46* Mom to three ages 20, 14, and 3.

*BethNC* - *Beth* - *40* I'm mom to a four-year-old son and foster mom to a 18-month-old bundle of energy.

*SaneMarguerite* - *40* - Mom to a six moth old son

*claras mom* - *44* - Dd is 3y8m. She's scary smart and very high energy. It's a wild ride.

*mamazee* - *40* - I have a 6-year-old and I'm expecting another in early Feb.

*ssh* - *48* - I have a 22 year old DD and a 33 month old DD

*avivaelona* - *41* - *Erica* - currently pregnant. I have a 3.5 year old too.

*mbbinsc* - *47* - with 10yo DS and 34month DD. She still nurses.

*AkRotts* - *41* - proud mother of a 23 yo, 2 yo twins and a 16 month old I am also guardian for my 12 yo neice.

*lara1828* - *40* - *Lara* - I'll be 41 in November. I currently have a 2.5 yo and a 4.5 yo

*Materfamilias* - *44* - I'm 44 (just turned) with a 15 yo stepdaughter, a 5 yo adopted son, and a 9 week old baby girl.

*MaxMommy* - *43* - ds 4.5

*ewink* - *41* - 4.5 yo DD and 3.5 yo DS

*hrsmom* - *40*

*Anglyn* - *almost 40*







four kiddos 17,5,3 and 1

*noordinaryspider* - *43* - Three DC 19, 16 and 1

*Treasuremapper* - *48* - DD's 5 and 7

*Verygoddess* - *Jennifer - 41* - due in May with #5. We have an almost 14yo, almost 12yo, 9yo and almost 2yo.

*athansor* - *Sue - 41* - birthmom of a dd who is 21 (she was placed for adoption as an infant) and have two ds's at home, one just turned 4 (on the 4th) and the other one is 6 months old today.

*kbhlmh* - *Karen - 47* - DH Larry (51), DD Lorraine is 20, DS Winston is 18, DS Kevin is 2y10m, DSS Chris is 23 and DSD Michelle is 20. We are currently TTC a younger brother or sister for Kevin.

*being* - *Be - 44* I have one dd 3.7 yo. I miscarried last year at almost same time I conceived again naturally this October . I'm dueJune 30 ish/early July and am soooo excited

*libba* - *45* - 8 year old DD and one angel baby

*Barab* - *46* - I'm going to be 46 soon and I have 20 y/o, 17 y/o and a 2 1/2 y/o.

*Shahbazin* - *41* - with 2 DDs - almost 1 1/2, & a little over 2 1/2 years old.

*uptowngirl* - *Jillian - 46* - I have a 4 year old daughter and a 6 year old son. My dh is 60 and these are our first (only) children.

*Close2Me* - *42 in Jan.* - with a 3 mo. old and a 7 yo.

*intentionalmama*- *Lesley 46* - with a 5 1/2 yo ds and looking to adopt another child.

*ElliesMomma*- *40* - DD 2.75 and newly pregnant with #2 EDD Sept. '09

*BelovedK*- *42* -TTC #3 13yo and 9yo

*SkyMomma* -*39.5* 5yo and 3mo

*Kidzaplenty*- *Jenny - 39* Helpmeet + MOMYS = #1 ~ '90 + #2 ~ '94 + #3 ~ '96 + #4 ~ '97 + #5 ~ '00 + #6 ~ '02 to '06~ + #7 ~ '04 + #8 ~ '06 to '06~ + #9 ~ '08 ----> My Blog . . . Josh24:15 . . .

*THANKFULFORFIVE* - *Billie - 41* My gang....kid-luvin' Dh-42, ds-20, ds-15, dd-14, dd-11, dd-14mos, hoping for #6 next year

*CathMac* - *Cath - 43 1/2* - 4 1/2 yo DD and 2 1/2 yo DD

*ZanZansMommy* - *41* - 3 yo DS and 5 yo DD

*allgirls* - *42* - my youngest is 3 and my oldest is 18 and expecting her first in September...so I will be a grandma soon

*jrabbit* - *42* - 3 girls ... 9, 4y11mo, and 10 days

*smibbo* - *42* - I have 4 kids. Three boys: 18, 16, 13 and an awesome little girl (18mos)

*Pookietooth* - *Jen* - *43* - and I have a five year old (who will be six soon). I'm also TTC, and hoping for #2.

*ktmama* - *Kate* - *43* with two dds (3.5 and 11.5) and one baby on the way. I'll be 44 when s/he is born in June.

*Miracle and Wonder* - *Candida* - *45* I had a miscarriage in February of 1983 (at 19) and I have two living babies, Isobel (who will be one at the end of the month) and Ianto (who was born 21 December). Ianto also had a twin, annalisa, who passed away at the beginning of this month.

*contactmaya* - *Maya* - *42* I have a 10 month old and a 3 1/2 year old. Both boys.

*SuzymomofLaura Suzy* - *42* - mother of two: my sweet Laura, now 4,5 yrs old already, and Lucie, our 20 month old (and not yet STTN at all), gluten/lactose intolerant VBAC miracle. And there's DH, aged 50, plus one cat, 11 months old, in our household. We BF, co-sleep and I recently summoned up the courage to pull out my CD stash again

Let me know if there's any corrections or updates that you'd like


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## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

Count me in!


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## chattie67 (Feb 17, 2008)

Looks like a great time to be joining!

I am Julieanne, I am 40yo SAHM and have a DS that's 20 and a DS that is 10 months.


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## mamasgroovin (Nov 27, 2006)

Hello, I am now officially 40...as of July 24th!








I have 4 kiddos...ds1 is 16, ds2 is 12, ds3 is 7 and dd is 3.5...so I do not have any SUPER little ones, but quite the spread. I have been a SAHM for 16 years now.

I'd like to add that I find it difficult finding older moms to hang out with. We've recently moved and the moms that I generally meet are MUCH younger. It is hard to find moms with preschool aged kids who aren't in their 20's, YK? I also think I am bit lazier as a parent this time around.







:

But for the most part, it rocks! I do have a lot of fun dragging my little clone around with me!!!









So...can I hang here now?


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## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

Sure! I guess I'll share my bio again. Well, wait a minute -- I guess it's all in my siggy!







Except that I'm 44.


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## yankeeterrier (Jan 22, 2008)

I'm 45 with DS almost 9M







:, WAHM with a website for maternity, infant and childrens resale items and a hyena cart store for cloth diapering items. I am cloth addicted!









I have become proficiant at one handed typing and have grown the mysterious 'eyes in the back of my head'.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

to all the new mamas! I've updated everything through 7/27 @6pm.

Would anyone like to propose a discussion question? Or, we can talk and encourage each other on this wonderful journey as "mature" mamas. I'm just so thankful that there are other 40+ ers here and active. I'm on another forum and when I started a 40+TTC thread - the only people that responded were 20&30 somethings







that sure made me feel OLD.


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## Kira's mom (Nov 30, 2004)

Hi I'm Hali and have been posting at 40plus for a while. This is the 3rd revision of this thread as far as I know. Dd was not even one when I found this thread! She is now 5 1/2. I just turned 47. We nursed for almost 4 yrs.(CLW) In the past 6 mos she has decided she madw a mistake and often tries to latch on!!


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## salt_phoenix (May 10, 2007)

I'm here!!! My 47 y.o. sister just recently commented that I was both the first and last of the siblings to have a baby... My answer?

SO FAR!!!


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## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovbeingamommy* 







ould anyone like to propose a discussion question?

Well, when I was pregnant with my second baby at 40, I encountered some negativity from relatives -- and I felt the negativity was mainly because I was so happy and this clearly wasn't an "accident." I think that because I already had one healthy child, people felt like I was crazy to intentionally have another at my advanced age.

And when some people realized that I'd decided to sidestep the medical route (unless I felt strong indication that I needed to see a doctor), and was just going to an independent midwife (which I didn't even start 'til the 3rd trimester) and planning on homebirth (which worked out wonderfully) -- well, I realize that's a choice society frowns on for women of any age ...

But I felt like with me, there was somewhat of an attitude that, "If you're dumb enough to intentionally get pregnant at 40, then you should at least have the sense to treat yourself as 'high risk,' and you should at least be 'socially responsible' enough to submit to all the risky testing to make as sure as you can that you're not bringing a handicapped child into the world," and so on.

I'm not criticizing any mama who decides *for herself* that she wants to treat her pregnancy as high-risk, or who decides *for herself* that she wants to get certain testing done. But I wondered if we could open a discussion about dealing with others who'd like for us to treat our pregnancies as high-risk, regardless of our feelings on the subject?

I'm 44, and I recently miscarried, so I'm not sure at this point if I'll be able to carry a baby to term. But if it does work out, I'm thinking I'd like to do things similar to how we did with our second. Except, of course, that I'd seek medical attention if I sensed that something wasn't right, as I would have before.

For those of you who've had babies at my age, how well does it work with the medical system, if you want to pick and choose your interventions, and don't want to be labeled 'high risk' just because of your age?


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

ive never seen the tribe before.

i have 3 children, am 40 and due sometime in October. (kiddos are 17, 10 and 2.5).

mammal_mama, you sound exactly like me. everyone thinks im insane.


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## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *PassionateWriter* 
i have 3 children, am 40 and due sometime in October. (kiddos are 17, 10 and 2.5).

Congratulations!







:

Quote:

mammal_mama, you sound exactly like me. everyone thinks im insane.








Then I'm glad we've found one another!


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Hali, Julie and PassionateWriter. Glad you joined us all







:

Quote:

I'm here!!! My 47 y.o. sister just recently commented that I was both the first and last of the siblings to have a baby... My answer?

SO FAR!!!
So *Julie*, I'm curious, are you TTC? Right now, I'm in the TWW phase







:

Quote:

For those of you who've had babies at my age, how well does it work with the medical system, if you want to pick and choose your interventions, and don't want to be labeled 'high risk' just because of your age?
Well I was 40 when I had my DS. I did everything (during the pregnancy) the conventional route







because I didn't know any better. I remember being offered additional tests because of my age and just turning them down. Never had any pressure or negativeness from anyone, I think part of that was because of our families anti-abortion stance. Other than testing I don't remember anything else that I needed to do because of my age. However, when #2 comes along I will probably have some difficulties since I do plan to use a midwife for homebirth.


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## 2goingon2 (Feb 8, 2007)

Hello all. I'm Janet, 40 year old mother of 3 with a surprise little one on the way and due in February. Looking forward to getting to know every one. I'm not the best at posting a lot but will try to keep up!


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## ricemom3 (Jan 29, 2008)

Can I join?

I am 43, married and have 3 kiddos. ds#1 is 17 and a high school senior. dd is 14, going into high school. and ds#2 is 1(7/02). We got some grief from family about that when I was pregnant, but they all seem to be fine now. Now the talk is if we are going to have another one so he diesn't grow up alone.


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## salt_phoenix (May 10, 2007)

Not currently TTC. Not preventing. I have an EBF lo & little time & energy for dtd for anything but occasional recreation. Just coasting ATM. We will see what happens.


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ricemom3* 
Can I join?

I am 43, married and have 3 kiddos. ds#1 is 17 and a high school senior. dd is 14, going into high school. and ds#2 is 1(7/02). We got some grief from family about that when I was pregnant, but they all seem to be fine now. Now the talk is if we are going to have another one so he diesn't grow up alone.

my ds3 was a complete surprise and its funny b/c we are prego w/ #4 for this reason..however, my 10 yo and 2 yo are very close so there is nothing that says the youngest will be "alone"....but it is fun (and interesting) to have a 17 (almost 18 yo) and 2 and baby. lol!


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

*Janet* and *Muriel*








congrats to all the expecting mamas...

I'm crossing my fingers as I'm officially in the TWW. I'm nervous because this is the first time TTC since my m/c in Apr. Has anyone taken progesterone while pregnant? My OB/GYN suggested it but never even did any test to see if I needed it. I guess he's just trying to be extra cautious...but is it because of my age or the fact I had a m/c earlier







??


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## ricemom3 (Jan 29, 2008)

Thank you for the welcome.

My older kids are having so much fun with the lo. In fact, my ds#1 has joked that when he goes to college next year ds#2 will have to go with him, b/c he can't leave him. (awww)
I am the one leaning towards having another (kinda) b/c I was 16 yrs younger than the youngest on my siblings and I hated growing up "alone".

to lovbeingamommy: Prayers and good baby thoughts going your way. Keep us posted.


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## salt_phoenix (May 10, 2007)

Yeah, good luck on the TTC!!!







: I know when I was TTC for Ember, it was the longest 9 mos. of my life!!! I had one m/c, and the next month, BAM... baby Ember.







:

My kids are all across the spectrum: old, middle and baby... I love it. They have each had their OWN time being "the baby". I hate to mess up my pattern, but I'd not be upset if we were graced with another lo sometime in the next 2-3 years.









I had progesterone with Ember for the first trimester. I hated the gooey mess (suppositories) but after the m/c, I was willing to try it. Dunno if that was the trick, but here she is! (I've had 4 m/c's total... Ember was the first time I tried with progesterone.)


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ricemom3* 
Thank you for the welcome.

My older kids are having so much fun with the lo. In fact, my ds#1 has joked that when he goes to college next year ds#2 will have to go with him, b/c he can't leave him. (awww)
I am the one leaning towards having another (kinda) b/c I was 16 yrs younger than the youngest on my siblings and I hated growing up "alone".

to lovbeingamommy: Prayers and good baby thoughts going your way. Keep us posted.

What a blessing that DS1 and DS2 are so close









Thank you for the good thoughts. I'm really feeling hopeful...


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *salt_phoenix* 
Yeah, good luck on the TTC!!!







: I know when I was TTC for Ember, it was the longest 9 mos. of my life!!! I had one m/c, and the next month, BAM... baby Ember.







:

My kids are all across the spectrum: old, middle and baby... I love it. They have each had their OWN time being "the baby". I hate to mess up my pattern, but I'd not be upset if we were graced with another lo sometime in the next 2-3 years.









I had progesterone with Ember for the first trimester. I hated the gooey mess (suppositories) but after the m/c, I was willing to try it. Dunno if that was the trick, but here she is! (I've had 4 m/c's total... Ember was the first time I tried with progesterone.)

Thank you!! Wow you got pregnant one month after m/c...that's great!! I wish I would have TTC after my first cycle, but I listened to my OB when he said it takes two or three months for the lining to build up







:

What dosage progesterone did you take with Ember...I love her name by the way
















babydust coming your way


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## salt_phoenix (May 10, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovbeingamommy* 
Thank you!! Wow you got pregnant one month after m/c...that's great!! I wish I would have TTC after my first cycle, but I listened to my OB when he said it takes two or three months for the lining to build up







:

What dosage progesterone did you take with Ember?


I did get pg. the very next month, and glad to have her... However, I often wonder if that is why I ended up with a retained placenta. (retained placenta=hemmorage & manual removal=ouch & ick) I had a midwife that was concerned when I told her I got pg. immediately that it might be the case. I ended up on hosp. bedrest anyway when my water broke at 31 weeks, so when she did come at almost 35 weeks, I was already in the hospital.





















My other babies were homebirths, so this was NO BUENO for me. It all turned out, obviously, but if it happens again, I won't TRY the next month... I really will wait at least one cycle.







I don't want another hospital birth if I have more and will do ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING in my power to prevent it. I was just so darned determined to get pg. I didn't want to wait even ONE MORE MONTH









I don't remember what dosage, they were pre-filled suppositories, if that's helpful.


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## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

I didn't "try" not to conceive after my miscarriage in late March -- it just doesn't seem to be happening.

Are any of you ladies coffee drinkers, like me? I don't completely give up caffeine during pregnancy -- I just keep my intake down. But I guess after the miscarriage, I've started wondering if there's anything I might have done to cause it.

But I also think my fertility's significantly affected by full-term breastfeeding. And I have no regrets about that.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Thanks for the info, *Julie*. It does help very much







:

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mammal_mama* 
Are any of you ladies coffee drinkers, like me? I don't completely give up caffeine during pregnancy -- I just keep my intake down. But I guess after the miscarriage, I've started wondering if there's anything I might have done to cause it.

Yes, I'm a coffee drinker. When I had my first LO in Nov. 2005, I specifically remember my doc telling me that one or two cups of coffee a day was fine. And that's what I drank. Then when I became pregnant with my second this year in Feb., I thought I'd stick to that same advice. However, when I went to my OB in Mar (at 7wks-the 1st visit) he told me to cut out all coffee







: Really, I wondered, why the different advice from 2005. He told me that there was a recent study (published in 2008) that linked coffee drinking with increased m/c rate. Oh great, so now I wonder if that caused my m/c. After some intense searching I found that study on the internet - I'll see if I can locate again and post. Sure enough, that's what it said, but if I remember right it was a slight increase and I think the amount was more on the moderate range of consumption. Really, only God knows why this happened and I can only speculate; I'm at peace with it now though.


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## 2goingon2 (Feb 8, 2007)

Hey everyone. I thought I had subscribed to this thread. Guess I need to take a look and see what I did suscribe to!

I took progesterone with the last two pregnancies. I took 200 mg once a day orally and both times it was only until my first lab work came back and looked good so I was told to stop. My little sister took it vaginally for her last two pregnancies but I dont' recall how long she had to take it.

Re coffee - yes, I still drink it. I typically drink about 8 ounces each morning during the week and that or maybe 10 on the weekends. I don't think there's that much caffeine in it to worry me but I understand your being concerned and wanting to do what feels right to you. I also drink a nice cold coke from time to time too.

It is hot here - wicked hot. I'm already so tired from being in the first trimester and having a little one who doesn't sleep well and this heat is really zapping me. I feel so worthless sometimes. I need to clean my house, there's always laundry and yard work and on and on and on. I work outside the home full time too so I just feel drained. I remember my last pregnancy I did get a wonderful energy boost during the 2nd trimester and I hope it happens again.

Guess I'm feeling a little chatty...
We weren't trying to conceive...but weren't trying to prevent either. I had one post-partum period as I was breast feeding too. My milk production took a complete and total nose dive and now my little guy is on formula. I hate it. He even had his first ear infection last week. He doesn't seem bothered in the least not to nurse and I've had no engorgement or leaking...just incredible sadness coupled with pregnancy hormones. I envy the mammas who can maintain their supply.

I believe that's it for now...hope everyone is feeling well and staying cool!


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Hello Everyone -

GOOD NEWS







:







:







: I'm pregnant again...for the third time after 40! I sure hope this baby sticks, the second one didn't







I just barely found out yesterday and good thing I did because I needed to have a mammo done that same day. Luckily, I found out and did an u/s instead. So I'm one month today. My naturopath is going to put me on natural progesterone cream sometime soon and is having me get my hcg and progest. checked at the lab.

I hope this post finds everyone well and staying cool in the hot month of Aug. KATE


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

congrats!!!!!

ive been feeling kind of drained lately. im 33 weeks this week. i definitely had much more energy having a baby at 22! lol!


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## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

Congratulations, lovbeingamommy!


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Ok, this thread hasn't seen any action for two weeks. It seems like there's a flurry of 40+ threads now on here so I guess I can blame it on the competition









Oh well, good luck to all the mamas with little ones and hope to see you posting somewhere soon.


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

compeititon? where?

i have been sooo drained lately.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=891679

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=930694

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=896399

Here's some...These few seem to be frequented fairly regularly. This thread just seems to be drying up which is sad because I needed it especially now since I'm newly pregnant. It's a whole different world being over 40 and pregnant - everybody's perception about it is different and it's nice to be able to talk candidly with older mamas. I lack that IRL. In my profession, education, most of the mamas are in their 20's or early 30's and can't be expected to understand what it's like to be pregnant one or two decades older than they are.

PassionateWriter - I hope you starting to feel a little better. You're so close only a few more weeks to go...







I just hope and pray I can be where you are in 30 more weeks or so









I subscribe to this thread so it's easy to check if it's had posts, so I guess I'll try and keep high hopes...


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

i know what you mean. i get so tired of hearing "oh i bet they are monitoring you so much closer b/c you are so much older" and i cant stand that. its hard to explain natural child birth to the younger crowds who are so mainstream. im lucky in that i dont have anyone in my close circle that is skeptical (at lesat i dont hang out w/ them during my pregnancy! lol!).

35.5 weeks now....it is close. baby is posterior now but im trying not to worry about it too much...all my other 3 were posterior so i guess its just what my babies do.


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## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovbeingamommy* 
It's a whole different world being over 40 and pregnant - everybody's perception about it is different and it's nice to be able to talk candidly with older mamas.

I was hoping to hear more about that too ... I actually tried to get a discussion like that going ...


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

Hi there! In the interest of limiting FYT to subjects not hosted elsewhere on the board, we have moved your tribe here. You're still a tribe, which means you're still support-only. If you have any questions about the move, please do not discuss it on the boards. Rather, contact an administrator or start a thread in Questions and Suggestions. Thanks, and happy posting!


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

good luck to all you mamas! see you around!


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Hi! Can I jump in?

My name is Sharun I am 40 yo I have 1 ds 15, 2 dds #1 is 13 and #2 is 7 mo.
I am an American living in Germany and have been here for 16 years raising Bi-lingual kids with duel citizenships!

I am not sure if we will be ttc'ing again. My dh is gone so much that I am practically raising my baby alone









Congratulations on your pregnancy *lovbeingamommy*!!!

Hi Julie!


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## MCR (Nov 20, 2001)

I think I should join too (if you'll have me)
I'm Pauline age 46
Mom to three ages 20, 14, and 3.
As my siggy says, I'm done, I'm now having fun clearing out the baby stuff. Theres so much of it it's taking me a while.
My new worry is, I'll be the old lady with a kid in K and the other moms won't invite Dd to play dates (I seem to be making up worrys lately)


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## Polliwog (Oct 29, 2006)

Me too, if it's ok.

I'm Beth, age 40. My sister referred to it as 20/20 so I'll use that for a while. I'm mom to a four-year-old son and foster mom to a 18-month-old bundle of energy.

I never planned on adopting a child. I was foster only. But then Chris moved into my home and my heart. Becoming his forever mom the most important thing I've ever done.

Today was my kids' first day of Pre-K for my big one and child care for my toddler. It's very quiet. Much too quiet.


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## SaneMarguerite (Jun 13, 2005)

ooh me! me!

I'm 40 and have a six month old son.

I totally dig it. I didn't like being seen as a medical curiosity by everyone in the universe while I was pregnant, but all's well that ends well.

however, no one told me that motherhood would be this hard on the knees. has anyone had good luck with not-so-medical interventions for creaky crunchy joints and achy muscles?


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## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MCR* 
My new worry is, I'll be the old lady with a kid in K and the other moms won't invite Dd to play dates (I seem to be making up worrys lately)

Actually, as kids get older they pick their own friends, and playdates have less and less to do with whether the mamas hang out ...

But, also, mamas tend to get less cliquish as they get closer to 30, so I think age gets to be less and less of a barrier as time goes on.

Sane Margeurite -- steering clear of the medical community during my pregnancy at 40 helped me avoid being treated as too much of a curiosity.







But I wonder what it might be like if I'm blessed to conceive again, now that I'm 44.

I'd still want to do a homebirth like I did last time. Last time I went unassisted for the first 2 trimesters, then started seeing a midwife in the last trimester. If there's a next time, I might go unassisted all the way. I love Laura Shanley's Freebirth site!

http://www.unassistedchildbirth.com/-19k -

Edited to add: I keep messing up the link somehow!


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

SaneMarguerite I am having problems with my joints too. My mw said that I am probably not drinking enough. I have started drinking more and it hasn't helped







:


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Hi, All -

I've been a *very* occasional contributor to the other threads. Time gets away from me. I'm 44. Dd is 3y8m. She's scary smart and very high energy. It's a wild ride.









Quote:


Originally Posted by *salt_phoenix* 
Not currently TTC. Not preventing. I have an EBF lo & little time & energy for dtd for anything but occasional recreation. Just coasting ATM. We will see what happens.









Well, I'm here to tell you that the method works....for getting pregnant. My first appointment is today. If all goes well, the babe will arrive in April.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mammal_mama* 
Sane Margeurite -- steering clear of the medical community during my pregnancy at 40 helped me avoid being treated as too much of a curiosity.







But I wonder what it might be like if I'm blessed to conceive again, now that I'm 44.

I'm curious about that too. I was pregnant with dd just before 40 and had her at 40-1/2; didn't seem to be a big deal at all to the medical profession. Now...we'll see.


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## mamazee (Jan 5, 2003)

I'm 40, and I have a 6-year-old and I'm expecting another in early Feb. I don't know if the 6-year-old counts as a "little one" yet, but she sure seems little to me. And the new baby will certainly be little.


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## salt_phoenix (May 10, 2007)

HI JEZZY!









Finally saw the elusive PPAF. Almost 2 weeks to the date after starting solids with Ember at 6 mos. It will be interesting to see what my cycle starts doing.

I sure am loving this baby tho... I feel so fortunate to have her. :-D


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## ssh (Aug 12, 2007)

I have a 22 year old DD and a 33 month old DD and I'm 48, so count me in too. I was so excited while I was pregnant I didn't notice if people thought it was weird.
Jezzy and SaneMarguerite I've had some problems with my joints too. I think some of the causes are falling asleep while nursing, not moving while I'm asleep (cause we cosleep), spending more time sitting on the floor, and extra nutritional needs from nursing. For the first two issues I use pillows to relieve pressure on my hips and knees while nursing laying down and make a point to move to a comfortable position before going back to sleep. Walking seems to help for stiffness. And for extra nutritional needs while nursing I eat foods that are higher in nutrients, and take a supplement.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Jezzy* 
Congratulations on your pregnancy *lovbeingamommy*!!!


Thank you!!

I guess _Parenting_ is where this thread really needed to be to survive...


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

*Jezzy
MCR
BethNC
SaneMarguerite
claras mom
mamazee
ssh*


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## avivaelona (Jun 24, 2005)

Me too, I'm on the "competitor" thread in pregnancy...since I'll be 41 in 10 days and am pregnant. I have a 3.5 year old too though so I think I belong here as well







I think moving to parenting is a good choice, because I never thought to check FYT and well, most of my issues with my age are really in reference to parenting.

Mostly this pregnancy I actually feel younger than my last pregnancy at 38 but there are some things about age that are a problem. I am on bedrest and I worry if I am going to bounce back from that as well as I did at 38.

I'm less worried about the other parents than I used to be, for a while I just kept meeting other moms in their early thirties or younger, but at my son's preschool there are a lot of moms who are my age or close, yeah for some of them their little one is their youngest and not their oldest, but it just doesn't feel like as much of a difference. Its nice not to stick out with being the only one whose grey shows


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## mbbinsc (May 8, 2008)

I have been looking for y'all. I am 47 with 10yo DS and 34month DD. She still nurses. Anyone dealing with perimenopause and breastfeeding? My DD has severe food allergies so I am hoping to nurse for awhile. Just don't know if I can deal with hot flashes while nursing!


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## AkRotts (Sep 2, 2007)

Hi everyone









I am 41 and the proud mother of a 23 yo, 2 yo twins and a 16 month old







:







I am also guardian for my 12 yo neice.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *avivaelona* 
Me too, I'm on the "competitor" thread in pregnancy...since I'll be 41 in 10 days and am pregnant. I have a 3.5 year old too though so I think I belong here as well







I think moving to parenting is a good choice, because I never thought to check FYT and well, most of my issues with my age are really in reference to parenting.


Are you on the, Over 40 thread in the Jan. DDC? I'm also pregnant (6wks) and started the May DDC and I'm older than EVERYONE!! I thought there would be at least 1 or 2 others


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Sorry about the bedrest *avivaelona*!


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## salt_phoenix (May 10, 2007)

I had bedrest for a month before Ember was born. I can tell you it sucked and I felt VERY weak and out of shape from so little activity after that time.








Hopefully you will do your bed-bound exercises better/more than I did.


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovbeingamommy* 
Are you on the, Over 40 thread in the Jan. DDC? I'm also pregnant (6wks) and started the May DDC and I'm older than EVERYONE!! I thought there would be at least 1 or 2 others









It's early yet. there's a couple of us in the April DDC. I've noticed quite a number of women who've officially "joined" after lurking for some time.

Had my OB appointment. The *only* reference made to my age (other than all the boilerplate offers of screening and tests, which start, you know, at 35) was he said he hadn't expected to see me again, because of the difficulties of conceiving after 40. We agreed that it was a good sign overall that I did conceive, at 44, without intervention.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *claras_mom* 
It's early yet. there's a couple of us in the April DDC. I've noticed quite a number of women who've officially "joined" after lurking for some time.

Had my OB appointment. The *only* reference made to my age (other than all the boilerplate offers of screening and tests, which start, you know, at 35) was he said he hadn't expected to see me again, because of the difficulties of conceiving after 40. We agreed that it was a good sign overall that I did conceive, at 44, without intervention.









Well if no one minds, I might pop on over to the Apr. DDC now and then. I think that's great that you conceived at 44 naturally! I did also at 43. I'll be 44 though when the baby comes in May.


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## salt_phoenix (May 10, 2007)

I wouldn't complain if I found a BFP during my 43rd year.








Well, I wouldn't complain EVER, but I wouldn't mind waiting until then either.









Congrats to you expectant moms!!!


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## lara1828 (Aug 11, 2005)

Hi everyone,

I'll be 41 in November. I currently have a 2.5 yo and a 4.5 yo and am struggling to decide if I want to TTC #3. I KNOW if I were younger, I'd be having a third, but I feel really unsure about the idea of having another baby now that I've hit the big 4 - 0.

Lara


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## avivaelona (Jun 24, 2005)

No I'm not on the January DDC one, I'm due in December, but there is a general one that I started in the main "I'm pregnant" section just for pregnant and over forty folks. Its not linked to DDC, there are five of us that are over forty in the December DDC but we haven't started a seperate thread there.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

*Updated*

Welcome







:

*Erica
mbbinsc
AkRotts
Lara*


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *salt_phoenix* 
I wouldn't complain if I found a BFP during my 43rd year.








Well, I wouldn't complain EVER, but I wouldn't mind waiting until then either.









Congrats to you expectant moms!!!

Thanks!!

I'm so thankful and happy to be pregnant. It's just hard to be fully happy at 7wks since I had the earlier m/c. I find myself always wondering "what if" and hoping I'm doing everything right that I possibly can with diet and other things. I never had this problem with my DS at 40. But then, I didn't know very much about the reality of m/c


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## Shahbazin (Aug 3, 2006)

Wow! Lots of expectant mammas on this thread








I'm turning 41 this month, & have a 1 year old & a 2 year old (14 month spacing







& I had a m/c just before conceiving DD#1)
I think that I'm in a better, more patient place for raising my kids, but that my stamina (like dealing w/not sleeping...) isn't as good as it was when I was younger... DH is 53, & he often complains that he's too old for this!








I'm having a lot more trouble getting back into shape after baby #2, & I don't know if it's a multiple child thing, or an age thing. We aren't planning to have any more kids - otherwise, we'd be outnumbered!
Anyone else dealing w/raising small children AND helping take care of elderly parents? We moved in w/DH's parents last fall after we lost our home in the wildfires, & they're in their 80s & not in very good shape - DH had been driving out to their house weekly to do yardwork, housecleaning & cooking for them for a long time, but frankly, the're at the point now where they couldn't live here by themselves if we weren't living w/them.


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovbeingamommy* 
Well if no one minds, I might pop on over to the Apr. DDC now and then. I think that's great that you conceived at 44 naturally! I did also at 43. I'll be 44 though when the baby comes in May.

Come on over anytime, though there's no separate thread. There aren't that many of us in our 40s, but quite a number 35 and over.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Shahbazin* 
We moved in w/DH's parents last fall after we lost our home in the wildfires...

Wow. Will you rebuild, or eventually find a new place? We were about a mile from areas under mandatory evacuation during the Gap Fire this summer, which was plenty close for me.

In answer to your question, dh's parents are both deceased, and mine (divorced) live halfway across the country. If it ever came to it, and one of them were to move out here, we'd probably try to find a house that would work for dual living, since I can't imagine anything else working. (Right now, I tease them about the possibility of sheet-rocking the pergola, or pitching a tent). But we're fortunate in that my mom is in decent health and is very "on top" of things. Dad...not so decent health, but seems to be keeping up with it.


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## Shahbazin (Aug 3, 2006)

Our old place was rented, & isn't being rebuilt, so we'll be moving on eventually... while the housing market is getting better, we don't have much in the way of savings, & DH doesn't want to commit to something when his job doesn't have long-term stability (start-up biotech - gets funding 6-12 months at a time), we're saving money by living w/family (all 6 of us in a 1200 sq ft house








), & his folks do need the live-in help (MIL has Alzheimers, is incontinent, mostly deaf, doesn't see well, & has mobility problems - FIL is sharp, but going in for cataract surgery soon, & doesn't walk very steady).

Sometimes I wish we'd started our family earlier, as I feel that wider spacing might have been easier to deal with - how do those of you with babies now, plus older kids, feel about that? Is it easier, or like so much about parenting, "it depends"?


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

I'll let you know about the spacing thing. There's going to be a 4-1/2 year difference between dd and her upcoming sibling. I hope that she gets through the worst of the "terrible fours"







by then. I sometimes think that being her age must be like being a pre-teen, except without the hormones--I mean experientially. Either that or she's extra stressed because we've gotten really, really serious about potty learning. Oh and her best friend(s) all decamped from the home daycare to pre-school. As you imagine, the two sentences are related. Can't even think of moving her to a different place unless she's potty trained.

We're lucky in that dh got into the housing market many, many years ago. We've devoted part of the summer to getting small improvements/repairs done around the house so that if we *do* decide to try to move, the house would be ready. But it also makes it nicer for us. Six people in 1200 square feet does put a different spin on it, though. Maybe I just need to get rid of half my stuff.


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## deadheadmomma (Feb 22, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *salt_phoenix* 
Yeah, good luck on the TTC!!!







: I know when I was TTC for Ember, it was the longest 9 mos. of my life!!! I had one m/c, and the next month, BAM... baby Ember.







:

My kids are all across the spectrum: old, middle and baby... I love it. They have each had their OWN time being "the baby". I hate to mess up my pattern, but I'd not be upset if we were graced with another lo sometime in the next 2-3 years.









I had progesterone with Ember for the first trimester. I hated the gooey mess (suppositories) but after the m/c, I was willing to try it. Dunno if that was the trick, but here she is! (I've had 4 m/c's total... Ember was the first time I tried with progesterone.)

My 24 year old daughter's name is Ember also







. I got the name from Elfquest comics and was wondering if you did too







.


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## salt_phoenix (May 10, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *deadheadmomma* 
My 24 year old daughter's name is Ember also







. I got the name from Elfquest comics and was wondering if you did too







.

That is SO COOL! I never knew an Ember before my own. Then suddenly, they seem to be everywhere! Isn't that the way?
Nope, not from Elfquest. We are burners... she is our little Ember.







:
(she is also the only thing that keeps the fire burning when we are ready to give up on each other.)


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Oh well, back to the TTC over 40 thread. I looked at my past post and I guess I never posted on this thread that I've had m/c #2







The baby passed at 6wk3d (exactly the same time as baby #2) I didn't find out until the u/s at around 8wks and another confirmation one at 9wks. Now one week later I finally m.c'd naturally. However, Sunday morning a trip to the er was in order since I had an extreme, I mean extreme, amount of blood loss. I'll probably post my story in the birth loss forum sometime next week.

It's been hard, but we're not going to give up TTC. I keep saying there has to be some good eggs still left in me.


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## salt_phoenix (May 10, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovbeingamommy* 
I've had m/c #2









It's been hard, but we're not going to give up TTC. I keep saying there has to be some good eggs still left in me.










It's never easy... I've had 4. The good news is, both my last two girls were "third times a charm" babies.







I am SURE you have some good eggs left!


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## Materfamilias (Feb 22, 2008)

Lovbeingamommy









Can I join?
I'm 44 (just turned) with a 15 yo stepdaughter, a 5 yo adopted son, and a 9 week old baby girl. I had a m/c before Odette was conceived, and both of those pregnancies were perimenopausal "accidents". Couldn't be happier to have the little one, though


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Materfamilias* 
Lovbeingamommy









Can I join?
I'm 44 (just turned) with a 15 yo stepdaughter, a 5 yo adopted son, and a 9 week old baby girl. I had a m/c before Odette was conceived, and both of those pregnancies were perimenopausal "accidents". Couldn't be happier to have the little one, though









Hi and Welcome *Materfamilias* - You are now an official member, mama!!







:







:


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

lovbeingamommy









You know, I'm 13 weeks today and still don't feel out of the woods. And I know that part of the feeling is a keen awareness of my age. I'm sorry for your loss and hope that you have good fortune in ttc again.


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

lovbeingamommy I am sorry


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Jezzy - I love your slideshow!!

Bumping this thread to get some ACTION going here...









How's everyone doing with your LO's...any new milestones? Let's share stories.

My DS (almost 3) is starting to spell and read simple words and is always on the lookout for letters when we go driving...he's always sure to yell out, "Mama I see letters S T O P (his favorite) it's on a red okagon shape!" he gets so excited. I think it good though that he's so aware and always on the lookout. Honestly, he's learned so much from the PBSKids series on tv. That's one thing I don't mind him watching, but the yellow sponge aka SpongeBob that's another. DH lets me watch when I'm not around









Have a wonderful Friday mamas, and let's get this thread going again


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Thank you *lovbeingamommy*!









I am going through a lot with my ds (15) he is being a complete a$$ and I don't know how to get through to him. He is totally self centered ( gets this from his dad ) He parties WAY to much ( yep it is legal here in Germany







) Isn't doing his homework







He locks himself in his room all afternoon and listens to music and only comes out if he wants to eat something.

Dd1 is just got her period and is very b!tchy. When I ask her (them) to do something for me it is only with huffing and puffing.

our Lo is doing great. I am glad that she can't talk back to us yet or be sassy. She will be walking soon she walks around things already and stands alone. She is on tour all day long, crawling from one place to another. It is fun to watch her to discover new things. She is facinating!


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## Kira's mom (Nov 30, 2004)

Hi Mamas- I haven't posted here in a while. Dd is 5 1/2. I'm 47. She gets more independant every day. It's an amazing journey for all of us. Best, Hali


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## yankeeterrier (Jan 22, 2008)

Boogie is about to turn 1 and I am about to turn 46. He has 4 teeth and is crawling and cruising like a maniac. He loves his dog, Rebel, and Grandpa is spoiling him rotten.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

: Woohoo posts!! I'm not hanging by a "thread" any longer hoping to see if this makes it. Ok, I know, bad joke









*Jezzy* - I hope things settle down soon with your teenagers. I can't believe the drinking age is so young in a lot of Europeon countries!! I've taught in Hungary and Latvia and I remember my students taking me to a disco for the first time (they were between 18-21) and how shocked I was when I got there. At 35 I was the geriatric partygoer! We also saw some 14 year olds that were obviously drunk on our way back to the university. I think they were from Poland. The teenage years are turbulent times - I'll be thinking of you







Glad to hear everything is going well with your LO, enjoy each and every precious moment









*Hali* - is you Dd in Kinder this yr? Or do you hs? I'm still trying to figure out what to do with my DS.

*yankeeterrier*







Grandpas are the BEST!!







I'm so thankful my DS has two great grandpas so close by...they're great babysitters









just a general question - I've been trying to figure out why this thread has its ups and downs and wondering if you all think everyone here knows about subscribing. I just figured it out after about 9 mo on MDC and it's great because I can instantly see which of my important threads have new posts. I love it because it helps me to keep things organized and save time. Well, I guess if you didn't know about it already you do now


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## MaxMommy (Feb 16, 2007)

Hey Mamas! Can I join too?
I'm 43, with ds 4.5 and we are ttc for almost 1 year. We had a mc 1 year ago have had no luck since. I'm ready to give up, feeling too lold for the trying, but reading this thread has given me hope. Thanks.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

*MaxMommy*







to our tribe







:







:

I'm 43 too with two m/c in the past five months, but it's NOT going to deter me in meeting my goal. I'll be 44 in Feb. and we'll start TTC then. I'm working with my midwife now to try and do everything possible to prepare my body once again.

There's always hope if you're still having AF!! I'm sending you some positive vibes


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

*lovbeingamommy* i forgot to add that you child sounds amazing!









Welcome *MaxMommy* !!

So, I think that I o'ed for the first time last week, I thought that it was Af comming on for the first time pp. Well dh and I dtd on that day and the more I thought about it I think that I was O'ing. What are the chances of catching the first egg if I acutally O'ed? Please tell me slim and none


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Jezzy* 
So, I think that I o'ed for the first time last week, I thought that it was Af comming on for the first time pp. Well dh and I dtd on that day and the more I thought about it I think that I was O'ing. What are the chances of catching the first egg if I acutally O'ed? Please tell me slim and none









So it may not be slim to none, but it's probably pretty low. I mean statistically they say that by the time we're 40 our chances in any one month are < 5%. BUT...that's for the general population of women. What I know from my experience, I've been pregnant THREE times on the first month of TTC over 40. However, two didn't make it







, but still I was successful getting pregnant. Did you get pregnant easily, quickly with your other children? That might be a good indictator for you personally. Statistics drive me nuts and I'm trying not to listen to the grim over 40 stories anymore.

Whatever happens, I hope it's what you want, mama!!


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

bump


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## ewink (May 23, 2005)

I just found this thread, and I belong here too. I am 41 (will be 42 in January) and have an almost 4.5 yo DD and a 3.5 yo DS. I think having LO's keeps us young. Heck, I still get carded sometimes when I buy wine or beer. LOL
I think the one thing that makes me realize my age is the fact that we won't have any more kids. My DH is 48 and had vasectomy not too long aftr DS was born, he was more done that I was. But, even at 37-38, I had a very difficult pg with DS, and had many miscarriages before that. So the thought of being pg now would scare me. Part of me is a little sad at the thought of no more babies, but I treasure my 2 precious kids!
I am a SAHM, hoping to start my business of playing music at weddings and other events up again soon. I also compose new age music so I'm hoping to get a website up for that soon too. It's hard with 2 LO's at home though.


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Hi Ewink! Welcome!


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

New stuff.....dd is finally getting potty learning. At almost 4, it's time. It's been a weird thing for a long time; she's a kid who knows her body's cues but just hasn't cared about peeing in the potty (and yeah, pooping is going to take longer). We--dh and I--are pretty ecstatic but trying not to make too big a deal of it.

It's rough for her right now. I hadn't thought about pre-school until she's four or so, but other parents at her daycare, including her best friend's parents, had other thoughts. There was a mass exodus from the home-based daycare into preschools in September--3 or 4 kids close to her age. She desperately misses her best friend--and yes, we are lucky enough to live next door to each other, but it's not that easy for the girls to spend a lot of time together. And if they have a day when they're not getting along, it hurts more.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ewink* 
I just found this thread, and I belong here too. I am 41 (will be 42 in January) and have an almost 4.5 yo DD and a 3.5 yo DS. I think having LO's keeps us young. Heck, I still get carded sometimes when I buy wine or beer. LOL
I think the one thing that makes me realize my age is the fact that we won't have any more kids. My DH is 48 and had vasectomy not too long aftr DS was born, he was more done that I was. But, even at 37-38, I had a very difficult pg with DS, and had many miscarriages before that. So the thought of being pg now would scare me. Part of me is a little sad at the thought of no more babies, but I treasure my 2 precious kids!
I am a SAHM, hoping to start my business of playing music at weddings and other events up again soon. I also compose new age music so I'm hoping to get a website up for that soon too. It's hard with 2 LO's at home though.









ewink!!


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

Hi- can I be part of this group?- I will be 40 in January! Just had my first babe at 39. I specifically chose my midwife because she didn't consider my age to be a risk factor! (I've just read the beginning posts so far.)


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## Anglyn (Oct 25, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovbeingamommy* 
So it may not be slim to none, but it's probably pretty low. I mean statistically they say that by the time we're 40 our chances in any one month are < 5%. BUT...that's for the general population of women. What I know from my experience, I've been pregnant THREE times on the first month of TTC over 40. However, two didn't make it







, but still I was successful getting pregnant. Did you get pregnant easily, quickly with your other children? That might be a good indictator for you personally. Statistics drive me nuts and I'm trying not to listen to the grim over 40 stories anymore.

Whatever happens, I hope it's what you want, mama!!










My grandmother got pregnant at 42 quite by accident, her two kids were 19and 17 and she was done! Or so she thought. That accident was my momma. So Im guessing getting pg after 40 isnt out of the question for me. I was 38 when I had my youngest.

Oh, btw, can I join or do I have to wait until April when I turn 40? Im just about *at* 40 and I have four kiddos, ages 17, 5, 3 and 1!


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

*hrsmom*

*Anglyn*








:


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## Mel*APMomma (Oct 23, 2008)

Hey I'm not 40, I'm actually 23 but I wanted to add that my mom is 43 and her and my dad have a daughter (my sister) who is 5 weeks younger then my oldest son. She will be 2 on November 20th


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## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovbeingamommy* 









*hrsmom*

*Anglyn*








:

I second that emotion!







It's good to see you over here!


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

Thanks for the welcome! I look forward to getting caught up on reading this thread!









One of my first thoughts after becoming pregnant at 38 1/2 was "ok, now I can turn 40!" I'd love to have one or two more babies, we'll see. I'm a single mama, so just focusing on this one right now! Since becoming pregnant, I've learned so much, and I'm happy to know that my childbearing years are definitely not over!


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## Anglyn (Oct 25, 2004)

You know, it's funny, my reason for having my three little ones so close was to have them and be done because I "dont wanna be having babies when Im forty". But here I am nearly forty with my youngest under two. I would think that, more than age, having had four healthy children, would be an indicator of my ability to have another one, wouldnt it? With my youngest, I did the level two u/s because I was "high risk". It showed a white spot on his brain,they didnt know what it was, so I went over for a fetal mri (didnt even know they did those) which, a mere week later, showed nothing. So I had to do another u/s which showed...nothing. But the amount of stress it put me through? Even after follow up was normal, I was still holding my breath, ya know?


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## Anglyn (Oct 25, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mammal_mama* 
I second that emotion!







It's good to see you over here!

Thank you! Im staying out of that other thread for a day or two.....


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

Hi, I thought I'd already posted on this thread but apparently not.

Terran was born three weeks before my 43rd birthday, UC/UP all the way to avoid all that "high risk" stuff. I have two older children (19 and 16) and used to say that when i was 35 i was DONE because I did not want to be an older parent.

Well, that didn't work out.

I think what i was actually afraid of was raising a very young child while dealing with health/fitness issues. I'm active and strong and have an unusually "easy" nine month old, so that hasn't been a problem.

I wish I had enough time left to have another little one (and haven't completely ruled out that possibility yet) because I am enjoying parenthood so much more this time around.


----------



## Anglyn (Oct 25, 2004)

I know! I use to joke about how I'd be done at 40, as my oldest will be 18 the year I turn 40. And now, that same year, I'll also have kids that are 6, 4 and 2!


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## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *noordinaryspider* 
Terran was born three weeks before my 43rd birthday, UC/UP all the way to avoid all that "high risk" stuff.

Oh, that's wonderful! I hope to go that route if we're blessed to have another (I'm 44). I was 40 when I had dd2, and I was UP until I started seeing a midwife in the third trimester, then dd2 was born at home a few minutes before our midwife arrived (but I had friends there, one of them a trained doula -- so it still wasn't exactly a UC).

Dh and I felt very empowered by this whole experience, so it's pretty likely we'll be aiming for UP/UC if I do get pregnant again.


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

You know, it's funny....with both pregnancies, I expected some reference to "high risk" because of my age--40 the first time, 44 now--and it just hasn't happened. In fact, the only time my age has come up this time was when my OB said he hadn't expected to see me again, after all this time, but only because conceiving without intervention at my age is a lot harder. So we agreed it was a good thing and nothing more's been said.


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## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *claras_mom* 
You know, it's funny....with both pregnancies, I expected some reference to "high risk" because of my age--40 the first time, 44 now--and it just hasn't happened. In fact, the only time my age has come up this time was when my OB said he hadn't expected to see me again, after all this time, but only because conceiving without intervention at my age is a lot harder. So we agreed it was a good thing and nothing more's been said.

That's great! So, maybe all the "high risk" treatment is centered around 40+ women who needed help conceiving? Are pregnancies more high-risk if you need intervention to get pregnant in the first place?

I'm 44, I'll be 45 this May -- so maybe, if I get pregnant and stay pregnant, I'll actually be seen as super-healthy by the medical establishment (even though I'm obese) -- simply because I got pregnant, "at my age," without any help.

Still, I don't know if my curiosity is worth the risk of seeing a doctor just to find out how they'd treat me!


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

I'm actually inclined to think that it varies from practice to practice. Though I did read in a magazine, ahem, for expectant women over 40--Plum?--that "45 is the new 35."


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## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *claras_mom* 
I'm actually inclined to think that it varies from practice to practice. Though I did read in a magazine, ahem, for expectant women over 40--Plum?--that "45 is the new 35."









I love it!


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## Treasuremapper (Jul 4, 2004)

You can add me, too. I will turn 48 in a few weeks. We have two daughters ages 5 and 7.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

*noordinaryspider* Your birth story is amazing







:

*Treasuremapper*

I updated everyone on the first thread post just now


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *claras_mom* 
I'm actually inclined to think that it varies from practice to practice. Though I did read in a magazine, ahem, for expectant women over 40--Plum?--that "45 is the new 35."









Woohoo, this means I'm 33.


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## Verygoddess (Jun 18, 2006)

I am 41 and due in May with #5. We have an almost 14yo, almost 12yo, 9yo and almost 2yo.
Jennifer


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## athansor (Feb 9, 2005)

Hi
I just found this thread (well, the new one), so I want to join in!
I'm 41, and am the birthmom of a dd who is 21 (she was placed for adoption as an infant) and have two ds's at home, one just turned 4 (on the 4th) and the other one is 6 months old today.
Yesterday ds 1 asked if he could have a little sister, but I'm not sure we're ready to deal with that!
eta (My real name is Sue...and I'm a university prof. I'm also interested in a variety of sports, playing violin, veg*n cooking and belly dance!)


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*May I join? My info is in my siggy but I'll include it here: My name is Karen (47), DH Larry (51), DD Lorraine is 20, DS Winston is 18, DS Kevin is 2y10m, DSS Chris is 23 and DSD Michelle is 20. We are currently TTC a younger brother or sister for Kevin. I conceived Kevin naturally, our second cycle trying, and he was born about 2 months after my 44th birthday. I have had two early losses since he was born but we're still trying!!







*


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

*Jennifer

Sue

Karen*

Jennifer







congratulations on your pregnancy!! Are you in the May DDC? I was there for about 8 wks,







I'm hoping to be a long-standing member of the Feb. 09 DDC


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *kbhlmh* 
*May I join? My info is in my siggy but I'll include it here: My name is Karen (47), DH Larry (51), DD Lorraine is 20, DS Winston is 18, DS Kevin is 2y10m, DSS Chris is 23 and DSD Michelle is 20. We are currently TTC a younger brother or sister for Kevin. I conceived Kevin naturally, our second cycle trying, and he was born about 2 months after my 44th birthday. I have had two early losses since he was born but we're still trying!!







*

That's great you conceived naturally at 43!! I've also been pregnant three times (first month trying) over 40, although two ended in m/c. I'm not giving up though and definitely don't listen to the grim statistics about over 40 fertility rates. Right now there are 3 or 4 47yo's at my OB's office that conceived naturally.

Karen, here's some positive baby vibes comin' your way...







:


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*Thanks! I was talking to my OB the other day and he told me that his partner just delivered a healthy baby girl whose Mom was 52! I KNOW I have some good eggs left somewhere in me!







*


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *kbhlmh* 
*I KNOW I have some good eggs left somewhere in me!







*









:

EXACTLY that's just what I think too


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## Verygoddess (Jun 18, 2006)

Yes I've also been lurking in the May DDC. I kept meaning to post somewhere but seems like everytime I get both hands free I can't think of anything to say. I was happy to find this group though since this time round I do feel tired and old







Im hoping it was just first trimester stuff and Im still nursing. We were quite suprised by this pregnancy and are finally feeling like its going to stick around.

Jennifer


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*Jennifer - How far along are you?*


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## being (Jul 31, 2005)

Hi!
So glad I found this thread! I'm Be-I'm 44 yo.have one dd 3.7 yo.I miscarried last year at almost same time I conceived again naturally this October .I'm dueJune 30 ish/early July and am soooo excited.I'll be taking natural progesterone likely through first trimester to help sustain progesterone levels hoping this may help prevent early m/c-after 1st tri -placenta will take over the role of maintaining progesterone production.I'm looking forward to participating more /sharing more but dd beckons me.


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*







: Welcome and congratulations!!!*


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *being* 
Hi!
So glad I found this thread! I'm Be-I'm 44 yo.have one dd 3.7 yo.I miscarried last year at almost same time I conceived again naturally this October .I'm dueJune 30 ish/early July and am soooo excited.I'll be taking natural progesterone likely through first trimester to help sustain progesterone levels hoping this may help prevent early m/c-after 1st tri -placenta will take over the role of maintaining progesterone production.I'm looking forward to participating more /sharing more but dd beckons me.









Be and congratulations









I took natural trouche progesterone this last time, it worked too. I had the Hcg and prog test every week starting at 4wks and it increased from 11 - 20-something before I had a m/c. I'm pretty sure the m/c was chromosomal though nothing to do with prog. I've read so many positive stories about older women taking prog. during the first tri. So good for you







Are you seeing a midwife or OB?

Here's some good baby vibes for a sticky bean...







:


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Wow! welcome being, athansor, Verygoddess, kbhlmh and Treasuremapper!


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## being (Jul 31, 2005)

Thanks for such a warm welcome!This is the first pregnancy I've taken progesterone -originally prescribed by midwife for"luteal phase defect" The data is mixed /veiwpoints controvertial w respect to prescibing to" older "moms who have had one or more early miscarriages...but I had good results taking it to alleviate severe pms due to fibroids in my 20's.I am currently seeing an o.b at an all women's type practice ...She's aware and supportive of my birth plan =natural w/ minimal med. intervention & my doula on board....
I am concerned and sad .I started spotting =light last night -light -some cramping =menstral like w/ some back pain not identical to amount of bleeding & pain as last m/c...
light spot now only when I wipe .spoke w/ Dr. on call who said I could come in for U/s blood test yada yada -thing is u/s wouldn't tell me much no heartbeat at 5.6 wks etc..I am opting to wait for scheduled u/s on Nov. 24.unless I miscarry b4 that.I'm going to put myself on restricted duty-hopefully dd will be obliging her father is working.
"sticky dust" donations welcome.what will be will be and I will try to accept and be at peace with what is.
Be


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## mbbinsc (May 8, 2008)

This group is growing! Anyone deal with hot flashes and menopause while still nursing. I am 47 and still nurse my 3yoDD. She has food allergies so I am letting her wean when ready. My sister is an OB and has searched for info on breastfeeding through menopause, but can't find any!


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

*Be*, you are now an official member







: I updated you to the front page mama









Oh and here's some ....















































































So some sticky bean dust for each month







and one extra in case you go over


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

double post


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## Materfamilias (Feb 22, 2008)

: to all the pregnant mommas!!! Being, I hope all is OK.


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*Be - Tons of sticky vibes heading your way!!!

mbbinsc - I tend to get nighttime hot/warm flashes in my FP but I take EPO prior to O (for CM purposes) so that keeps it them check.*


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

i havent been to this thread in awhile (sorry...baby is only 3 weeks old right now and between him and 2 1/2 yo, things are a bit hectic).

we had our hba2cs. for anyone interested, the birth story is here: http://www.mothering.com/discussions...57&postcount=1

i dont think i could have done this in my 20's (the 2 young kiddos). i had too much going on then (college, etc. etc.). I needed to wait until i was older i think! lol!


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*







:














: Congratulations!! What's his name? We need pics!!*


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## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *PassionateWriter* 
i havent been to this thread in awhile (sorry...baby is only 3 weeks old right now and between him and 2 1/2 yo, things are a bit hectic).

we had our hba2cs. for anyone interested, the birth story is here: http://www.mothering.com/discussions...57&postcount=1

i dont think i could have done this in my 20's (the 2 young kiddos). i had too much going on then (college, etc. etc.). I needed to wait until i was older i think! lol!

Yay! Congratulations!







:


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Hi Everyone -

I just placed an age specific (over 40) poll question in the TTC sub-forum and need your input.

Here's the link ----

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=996259

TIA - Kate


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *kbhlmh* 
*







:














: Congratulations!! What's his name? We need pics!!*

we call him Zen but his full name is Valentine Zenson Lazarus (last name).

only 1 hand right now but here are a few:

http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...r/MVC04785.jpg

http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...r/MVC04797.jpg

http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...r/MVC04776.jpg


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovbeingamommy* 
Hi Everyone -

I just placed an age specific (over 40) poll question in the TTC sub-forum and need your input.

Here's the link ----

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=996259

TIA - Kate

it didnt work for me


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

Passionate - DUH! You put his name in your birth story post. What a wingnut I am!







He's GORGEOUS! I LOVE big babies!!


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## mbbinsc (May 8, 2008)

Love Zen's cheeks. I am impressed that you found time to write.

Interesting comment about EPO. I take it due to my DDs eczema (seems to help her skin through my milk). Glad to know I am getting benefit, too.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *PassionateWriter* 
it didnt work for me









Oh I'm sorry, it should be working now though.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *PassionateWriter* 
we call him Zen but his full name is Valentine Zenson Lazarus (last name).

only 1 hand right now but here are a few:

http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...r/MVC04785.jpg

http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...r/MVC04797.jpg

http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...r/MVC04776.jpg























those pics. He is a beautiful baby! I am soooo very happy for you and hope everything is going really well and you and your family.


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## Kira's mom (Nov 30, 2004)

Wow! 2004? I was here when this thread was started? It may have even been a continuation of a previous thread if I'm not mistaken. I was almost 42 when dd was born and so grateful to know there were other mommy's over 40. MOTHERING.com has been a great support for me.Time flies when you're alive!







:


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## Shahbazin (Aug 3, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *PassionateWriter* 
we call him Zen but his full name is Valentine Zenson Lazarus (last name). ...

Congratulations- what a sweet little guy!


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## Shahbazin (Aug 3, 2006)

Just marked the poll - honestly, I'm done now, at 41 w/2 DDs under 3 years old - but sometimes I think I'd have liked 1 or 2 more if DH was more helpful at parenting babies. I'm coming to the conclusion that it's the close spacing, more than my age, that's been wearing me out!


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Congratulations *PassionateWriter* What a cutie!!


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*mbbinsc - If you are TCC you should not take EPO in the TWW.*


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## being (Jul 31, 2005)

Hi everyone !! Thanks for the support and extra sticky dust.!!
What a lively and supportive group this is ! I'm glad to be a member!

I've been on bedrest w no laptop ugh! It's looking more like I'm having a M/c based on color & extent of bleeding although cramps have subsided greatly.I have an appointment tommorow for exam and bloodtest.I'll update tommorow.

Passionate Writer-
Thanks for sharing your birth story -it was beautiful !!! Congratulations !!

"Zen" is so precious .Is that his adoring older bro in pics? Take good care ! -Be


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*being - Hoping it is nothing and you have a sticky bean in there! Good luck tomorrow!*


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## libba (May 23, 2004)

New to this thread. I am 45 with an 8 year old DD and one angel baby. Secondary infertility made DD my only but we are proud as can be of our special girl. Scary smart and quite the little softball player. DH and I have been together going on 16 years ( 10 years married). I work 4 days a week as a RN in ambulatory surgery.


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*Welcome!*


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## mbbinsc (May 8, 2008)

kbhlmh, thanks for the info but my DH would have a MI if we had another. He 51 like your DH.

being, hope all is well


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *being* 
Hi everyone !! Thanks for the support and extra sticky dust.!!
What a lively and supportive group this is ! I'm glad to be a member!

I've been on bedrest w no laptop ugh! It's looking more like I'm having a M/c based on color & extent of bleeding although cramps have subsided greatly.I have an appointment tommorow for exam and bloodtest.I'll update tommorow.

Passionate Writer-
Thanks for sharing your birth story -it was beautiful !!! Congratulations !!

"Zen" is so precious .Is that his adoring older bro in pics? Take good care ! -Be









*Be*, I will be keeping you in my thoughts tonight and tomorrow until your appt.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *libba* 
New to this thread. I am 45 with an 8 year old DD and one angel baby. Secondary infertility made DD my only but we are proud as can be of our special girl. Scary smart and quite the little softball player. DH and I have been together going on 16 years ( 10 years married). I work 4 days a week as a RN in ambulatory surgery.









to our wonderful tribe!!







:


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*mbbinsc -







at the MI comment about your DH!

Happy Tuesday ladies! Kevin woke up with a







: in the middle of the night last night. Conveniently, DH has the day off so he is able to stay with DS today.*


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## being (Jul 31, 2005)

Thanks to all of you for your support.I am miscarrying this babe.So sad I held out hope until u/s....
The up side of this is that the staff was amazing-attentive,professional ,caring and most of all OPTOMISTIC and encouraging of my ttc again .I have no problem conceiving -all five of my sister's conceived in late 30-mid 40's.My mom had 16 pregnancies -10 healthy children after she was told that w/ less than 1 working ovary in her 20's. She had her last child at 43 at which point she decided ten little indian's was enough !!!I didn't even share this hx. w/ Dr. until she said on my inquiry @ age etc...there is no reason you shouldn't try as soon as you feel your body is ready-I would try again if I were you.
It was so refreshing to not have medical professionals -these women at this practice know little @ me ..I am a new patient at the practice...not make an issue of my age for any reason..
Now just waiting for hcg & progesterone levels...I will now continue honoring this loss.

Hopefully my experience /story can prove helpful to someone else.

Thanks Again.
-Be


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Oh Be, I am so very sorry


----------



## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovbeingamommy* 







Oh Be, I am so very sorry

















Yeah, me too!


----------



## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

I am so sorry Being


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*







Be - I am SO very sorry for your loss.







*


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## being (Jul 31, 2005)

I want to thank you all so much for your support.It's been a painful and busy week.
Dd started attending a different preschool this past Mon.It's a Montessori School -she's
appears to be adjusting and allready flourishing in new environment.

I love her so much and I realise that I am blessed to have her.She really wants a sibling and it is difficult for me to handle I may not be able to provide her one...

With this last pregnancy I was talking to my babe to be & massaging my womb every night in bed....So painful to have felt pregnant & ripe w/ life to viceral difference of no longer carrying life...

I hope others will continue to share /broach other topics...I think this group is awesome !

-Be


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## mbbinsc (May 8, 2008)

Being, I am so sorry for your loss.

My DS prayed for 2 years for a little sister. We were walking to school one day, when he patted my belly and said that there was a baby in there. I told him mommy was too old (I was 43) only to realize a couple months later that he was right! We have come to realize he is a very intuitive kid.


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## being (Jul 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mbbinsc* 
Being, I am so sorry for your loss.

My DS prayed for 2 years for a little sister. We were walking to school one day, when he patted my belly and said that there was a baby in there. I told him mommy was too old (I was 43) only to realize a couple months later that he was right! We have come to realize he is a very intuitive kid.


That is sooo beautiful!!!!


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

Be, i am so sorry.


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

mbb - That is VERY cool!


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Hello Mamas -

(*x-posted in TTC over 40 thread)*I

I know a lot of you are currently TTC on this thread and am wondering what your opinions are on taking 5-HTP or SSRI's while TTC? I know when I was pregnant at the beginning of this yr. I was taking Prozac - it ended it m/c. But then when I m/c in Sept. I wasn't taking anything. So I'm thinking is it better to be medicated or non-medicated and under stress







Oh, this is so frustrating because I'll be 44 in Jan. and feel like my fertility years are 7 more at most since my mom went through meno at 50.







Any advice mamas


----------



## being (Jul 31, 2005)

lovbeingamommy-
I was on prozac @ 5 years ago when ttc dd. I was advised by psychiatrist to minimize use of SSRI's particularly prozac at least during first trimester when organs are forming etc...Prozac has been reportedly linked w/ heart defects I guess more associated w/ 1 trimester use my depression heightened @ 3rd trimester when I resumed taking it w/ medical recommendation w/ hx. of Major Deppression and w/ hopes of thwarting PPD etc..Lower risk was acceptable/warrented vs. having my physiology & psychological capacity compromised ...which could have been worse outcome for babe.

Medication use during pregnancy is a hot button issue to be sure...

There are many other modalities others may use w/ benefit -just telling my experience..

With many meds. and indiv. circumstances level of risk & how they are weighed etc.. will vary .

Not trying to be vague -not wanting to provoke either ...

Web sites worth purusing w/ Dr. or solo =www.motherrisk.org ,www.Medscape.com
Sorry I can't give direct links right now...If you have trouble accessing sites let me know...Also Kellymom I believe has some data prob relevent.

Feel free to pm w/ specifics..? .I'll continue to post sources when I can

hth
-Be


----------



## Anglyn (Oct 25, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Shahbazin* 
Just marked the poll - honestly, I'm done now, at 41 w/2 DDs under 3 years old - but sometimes I think I'd have liked 1 or 2 more if DH was more helpful at parenting babies. I'm coming to the conclusion that it's the close spacing, more than my age, that's been wearing me out!

Ive come to that conclusion too! I really was thinking we were done after this last one. But as they all get older im thinking, maybe when the little guy is about three. I had three in three years plus two months. Thats close.


----------



## being (Jul 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovbeingamommy* 
Hello Mamas -

(*x-posted in TTC over 40 thread)*I

I know a lot of you are currently TTC on this thread and am wondering what your opinions are on taking 5-HTP or SSRI's while TTC? I know when I was pregnant at the beginning of this yr. I was taking Prozac - it ended it m/c. But then when I m/c in Sept. I wasn't taking anything. So I'm thinking is it better to be medicated or non-medicated and under stress







Oh, this is so frustrating because I'll be 44 in Jan. and feel like my fertility years are 7 more at most since my mom went through meno at 50.







Any advice mamas









http:Motherrisk.org. that's the correct addie not sure why no link

-Be


----------



## Barab (Nov 17, 2008)

I'm new here and it's my first post and I'm happy to find a place with Mom's over 40.







:

I'm going to be 46 soon and I have 20 y/o, 17 y/o and a 2 1/2 y/o.


----------



## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*Welcome Barab!*


----------



## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Welcome Barb!!


----------



## being (Jul 31, 2005)

Barab !


----------



## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*Hi ladies! How has everyone been?







showed late last night after my longest LP ever.







On top of that we had a cold front blow through and we had a low of 39 degrees last night!







: That might not seem bad to some of you but I live in SW Florida and we usually don't get that cold until January, if at all. But it's all good! Onto a new cycle with renewed hope!







*


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

*Barab* - I added you to the front page









*kbhlmh* - I forgot if you said you were TTC naturally or not. Oh, and freezing to me is 73 degrees







I live in AZ!!


----------



## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

Quote:

kbhlmh - I forgot if you said you were TTC naturally or not. Oh, and freezing to me is 73 degrees I live in AZ!!
*Yes, I am currently TTC naturally although I may try a couple more rounds of clomid. And I agree, anything below 73 IS freezing!







:*


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*What are everyone's T'giving plans?*


----------



## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Nothing







T'giving is not celebrated here


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## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *kbhlmh* 
*What are everyone's T'giving plans?*

We're having a turkey dinner at home. I think I'd like to read a Thanksgiving story, too.


----------



## being (Jul 31, 2005)

We are going to my sister's house -first Thanksgiving We've spent together in years.DD gets to play w/ her cousins too!

Mammal Mama -I think I'll read A Thanksgiving story too -thanks for the idea ...


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

We've been going to parents house forever. My mom's a great cook. I'm NOT. I wouldn't even know the first thing to do in cooking a turkey - I guess being a vegatarian is part of that









It's usually stressful bacause in my family my DS is the only toddler and gets all the attention from the adults. I think it's a little much, but what can I do. I just really wish he even had ONE cousin that was within afew years of his age. His nearest first cousins are over 23 yrs older. I guess that's one of the pitfalls of having children in your 40's







One reason I hope, hope, hope I can have at lease one more so my sweetie can have at least one sibling.

Back to Thianksgiving...we usually talk and talk and eat and eat til we can't eat anymore. then take home loads of leftovers to use for the next week. I tried to get my dad to put up the Christmas tree so we could decorate as a family on Thanksgiving night, but he seems to think it would be too dry by the time Christmas gets here







: My DH said that most of the trees are cut already anyhow so it wouldn't make a difference, but who knows.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING everyone!!!


----------



## uptowngirl (Jun 9, 2008)

New to this thread! I'm 46 years old and I have a 4 year old daughter and a 6 year old son. My dh is 60 and these are our first (only) children.


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

Hi! I haven't posted in a little while. Our new thing is a two hour nap in the evening on my front in the Ergo. Time to catch up on posts, I guess! (I have a hard time getting things done with her on my front. On the back, that's a different story, that is totally hands and arms free!)

Passionatewriter- awesome story! I would love an HBAC or even a VBAC! I need to find me a partner, though, one is my limit as a single mama. For now, anyway! When she's a little older I might go for it again, though!

Be- I'm so sorry for your loss!

Thanksgiving plans- I think we're going to spend two nights at my mom's house. (My mom is only 58 so she's a young nana and I'm an older mama!) We like to stay the night once in awhile, but with all the packing involved for one night, I thought we might stay for two. She only lives about 40 minutes away. We'll play games and eat yummy food and I'll probably reminisce about how last year at this time I was pregnant. We gave thanks for Hannah then and this year we definitely give thanks for her!


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## mbbinsc (May 8, 2008)

My 3yoDD has severe food allergies. Last year I cooked for 17 so that I could be sure to have dairy, egg, peanut and shellfish free foods. This year the family that usually visits will be coming over Christmas. The generation above my DH and me is almost gone. We will end up taking a trip to a cabin in the mountains for a little retreat.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *uptowngirl* 
New to this thread! I'm 46 years old and I have a 4 year old daughter and a 6 year old son. My dh is 60 and these are our first (only) children.









*Jillian* Glad you found the thread.







: I updated your info on the first page. I also send a friend request to new members so we can stay updated if the thread gets a little slow -


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Welcome Jillian!


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*Welcome to our group Jillian!

mbb - I couldn't imagine cooking for that many people! Hell, I have a hard time cooking for 6 people!
















hrsmom - I miss those "on the chest" naps!*


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

adjusting to life with 2 younger kids. ive never done this before so its definitely a learning experience...who says you cant teach old dogs new tricks?









Zen was 5 weeks old yesterday and I have to say, I think it took me 5 weeks to catch up. He is such a mellow baby at night though...has a really good sleeping pattern which none of my other kids ever had...but he nurses constantly during the day to make up for it. Lets just say that I am soo thankful to be a SAHM right now. I dont know how he would deal w/ being bottle fed...i woudl be pumping a zillion ounces a day.

this week was DP's first week back to work after paternity leave and it went well. I just made such we stayed out of the house for the most part. DP has this next week off too and im so excited. its just easier having him home.









TDay will be a 2 hour trip up north...to even colder air.







We rent cabins b/c the family is so large (6 siblings, 13 neices/nephews; gp's, etc. etc.). im excited but worried....Zen HATES the car.









Quote:


Originally Posted by *hrsmom* 

Passionatewriter- awesome story! I would love an HBAC or even a VBAC! I need to find me a partner, though, one is my limit as a single mama. For now, anyway! When she's a little older I might go for it again, though!

thanks.







i was single for a long time too. i was D'd when ds1 was 2 (well separated/ D'd when he was 3 i guess)...i swore that was my only one also. lol! Zen is baby #4! Life Happens! lol!

Welcome Jillian!


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*5 weeks already?! Wow!! Do you have any new pics of that gorgeous baby? Good luck on your road trip. Hope it goes smoother than expected!!*


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## mbbinsc (May 8, 2008)

PassionateWriter: It took me much longer than 5 weeks to have energy. I am in awe of your ability to travel!


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

ill try to find some links to some pix of him. i wish i could take better pix.

hanging in his hammock (no pun intended! lol!)

http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...r/DSCN4485.jpg

this is the pix we used for his birth announcement.
http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...DSC_0232-1.jpg

http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...YEBALLBW_1.jpg

http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...r/DSCN4420.jpg

http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...r/email3-1.jpg

and OMG can i just say that as of yesterday this 5 week old was 14.11 lbs. WOW!!!

getting out of the house is not an option w/ the toddler..he HAS to get out every day in order to have a decent night and thats more important than anything in this house right now. lol!


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*Great pics! What a cutie!







*


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Nice pics!!


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Oh, those pics are just beautiful







:







: gorgeous baby!!


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Ok, time for me to brag a little too. Here are some recent pics of my dd









Brushing her teeth

Is this ok mommy? I love the look in here eyes on this one.


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*Great pics!







the second one!!*


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## being (Jul 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *PassionateWriter* 
ill try to find some links to some pix of him. i wish i could take better pix.

hanging in his hammock (no pun intended! lol!)

http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...r/DSCN4485.jpg

this is the pix we used for his birth announcement.
http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...DSC_0232-1.jpg

http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...YEBALLBW_1.jpg

http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...r/DSCN4420.jpg

http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...r/email3-1.jpg

and OMG can i just say that as of yesterday this 5 week old was 14.11 lbs. WOW!!!

getting out of the house is not an option w/ the toddler..he HAS to get out every day in order to have a decent night and thats more important than anything in this house right now. lol!

Passionate Writer,

I LOVE 3rd pic=black & white =soooo Precious.

BTW - my nephew weighs 22 pounds at 4 mo mark -big baby boy like yours!!!
-Be


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## being (Jul 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Jezzy* 
Ok, time for me to brag a little too. Here are some recent pics of my dd









Brushing her teeth

Is this ok mommy? I love the look in here eyes on this one.

Your dd is adorable!!!
Some mischeif detected in pic two -mini jester like....
-Be


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Jezzy* 
Ok, time for me to brag a little too. Here are some recent pics of my dd









Brushing her teeth

Is this ok mommy? I love the look in here eyes on this one.

Adorable - pics


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Any advice for a family friendly way to suggest - without hurting feelings - that I don't want DS to have all kinds of cheap, plastic toys MIC. I was appalled two nights ago when my MIL suggested that me having OCD was somehow connected to not wanting my child to have toys MIC. I'm so very frustrated being about 90% AP and having family members attribute those beliefs to, oh, it's just her OCD problem







that's why she's that way









NO IT'S NOT!!!! Having OCD is totally irrelevant for me not wanting my child to have plastic toys or toys MIC, unorganic food, or too much sugary foods. Oh, and hs'ing, non-vaxxing, and the list goes on...

Why is it so hard for people just to accept that what you're doing for your child is your choice and stop judging. OMG, I love my child so much and research the majority of decisions I make from many different perspectives before I give the go ahead. So many people believe this is just plain wrong...that I should just go with the flow and accept what is normal,WDYT?


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Jezzy* 
Ok, time for me to brag a little too. Here are some recent pics of my dd









Brushing her teeth

Is this ok mommy? I love the look in here eyes on this one.


what an adorable little girl. and yeh, dishwashers are toddler [email protected]


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## Materfamilias (Feb 22, 2008)

Lovbeingamommy, I have no advice but feel exactly the same way. I know dd is going to be given lots of gifts and many of those will be plastic or MIC if I don't find some way to tactfully suggest other things... I'm already looked at as the oddball of the family for my views.








If anyone has good ideas on this I'd love to hear 'em. I have thought of sending family the recent Mothering article on this, but I'm not sure how it would look... I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings.


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## MCR (Nov 20, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *PassionateWriter* 
ill try to find some links to some pix of him. i wish i could take better pix.

hanging in his hammock (no pun intended! lol!)

http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...r/DSCN4485.jpg

this is the pix we used for his birth announcement.
http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...DSC_0232-1.jpg

http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...YEBALLBW_1.jpg

http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...r/DSCN4420.jpg

http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/m...r/email3-1.jpg

and OMG can i just say that as of yesterday this 5 week old was 14.11 lbs. WOW!!!

getting out of the house is not an option w/ the toddler..he HAS to get out every day in order to have a decent night and thats more important than anything in this house right now. lol!

Adorable.
and Jezzt your little one has quite the twinkle in her eye, I suspect she's a little monkey.
Heres the latest of my little monkey. She was Wonderwoman for halloween.http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f2...USA2008020.jpg


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovbeingamommy* 
Any advice for a family friendly way to suggest - without hurting feelings - that I don't want DS to have all kinds of cheap, plastic toys MIC. I was appalled two nights ago when my MIL suggested that me having OCD was somehow connected to not wanting my child to have toys MIC. I'm so very frustrated being about 90% AP and having family members attribute those beliefs to, oh, it's just her OCD problem







that's why she's that way









NO IT'S NOT!!!! Having OCD is totally irrelevant for me not wanting my child to have plastic toys or toys MIC, unorganic food, or too much sugary foods. Oh, and hs'ing, non-vaxxing, and the list goes on...

Why is it so hard for people just to accept that what you're doing for your child is your choice and stop judging. OMG, I love my child so much and research the majority of decisions I make from many different perspectives before I give the go ahead. So many people believe this is just plain wrong...that I should just go with the flow and accept what is normal,WDYT?

Is there any way to let your dh run interference with his mom (and other relatives)?


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *claras_mom* 
Is there any way to let your dh run interference with his mom (and other relatives)?

Well yes, I've actually being doing that but I may need to shut it down a bit.







I just took him to the ER this morning because he's so anxious and depressed that his left side of his body's been numb for the past five days and getting worse. So now he's off to a neurologist on Wed. So now I'm sure everyone's going to be blaming me for his problem and causing him too much stress when I ask him to speak to our families.

Honestly, I think what I'm going to end up doing is keeping a tub where I can keep these toys and then if a grandparent comes over let him just go ahead and play with them (so they can see it and enjoy it) but after they leave it goes back in the box in the closet.

I absolutely hate having to do this but I've heard far too many stories of dangerous toys, clothes, formula, food, etc. coming from China that's not in good condition. I even saw a program it was on Nova or Frontline that showed how there are two factory lines in China - one for products going to Europe (apparently they have higher standards) and the other for the US (with lax or no standards)







:

I'm just one mother trying to do the very best for my child by researching and keeping updated with alerts and so for and it hurts when others undermine my efforts


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*I would just tell them straight out that you do not want those kinds of toys, period. If you don't want your kids to have them then you should just donate them if your family/inlaws insist on giving the gifts anyway. I hate when people try to impose THEIR rules in YOUR house. GRRRR!!!!

I am sorry to hear about hubby. I hope he'll be OK. It's not your fault and forget about what everyone else thinks. You just worry about taking care of you and your immediate family.







*


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Under these circumstances--the gift thing; and I admit it's not a problem with my family--I'd probably make a list on Amazon and try to include some carefully vetted "mainstream" kinds of things along with all the really cool natural stuff. I'd "justify" the list by wanting to make sure that your kid wouldn't receive duplicates. And then I'd let it go. I wouldn't lecture or nag; just sweetly say thank you. Toys in a bin is a goods strategy for the first little bit; then they could disappear.

I've never gotten how people can look at the gorgeous (safe!) wooden toys available and not want to buy them, purely on aesthetic grounds. But that's just me.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *claras_mom* 
I've never gotten how people can look at the gorgeous (safe!) wooden toys available and not want to buy them, purely on aesthetic grounds. But that's just me.

















:


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Giving us a gentle little bump























Anyone...anything....?

I just don't want our tribe to get lost in the holiday rush


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

We are getting ready to go on vacation to Florida







My whole family will be there! This is the first time in 15 years that I have celebrated Christmas with MY family









Hope everyone is doing great!


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

*Have a good trip Jezzi I live in Florida!









AFM, I've just been busy with the holidays and stuff. Kevin's 3rd birthday is on Sunday so I am trying to get the party (lunch at our favorite restaurant) arranged. Other than that, now much is new. I am on day 4 of a 5 day clomid stint. Hopefully that will help get me pregnant for Christmas!*


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Been a mad rush here, but it's to a point where I can start really thinking about the holidays. Finals are over, so I just need to finish up and turn in grades for the quarter (due tomorrow; most of the work is done). And so is the Children's Christmas pageant at church, for which I selected music, made a rehearsal tape, and accompanied. Every year, I swear I'll stay out of it, then the result is so magical that I know I'll do it again next year.









Clara's birthday is Friday, so that's the next thing. We're not doing a big party--just cake and presents after dinner with her best friend + family, a couple we're all close to, and (as of last night) my bil, sil, and dh's aunt. If they make it--dh's aunt is elderly and if she's having a bad day, they may not want to make the trip, about 4 hours by car; less if the weather is good enough for flying. But even the prospect of it means that we have to unearth all the guest beds.









Today, dd (hypothetically) and I will wrap and ship presents, for those family members who live in distant places. You know....all of them, except for the ones coming on Friday, who are, coincidentally, the hardest of all to shop for and therefore not gifted yet.


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

Enjoy your trip, Jezzy! I wish I was closer to Florida so we could meet up IRL.

this is shaping up to be a good, albeit strange, Christmas for all of us. The three of us "adults" (ds1 is technically still a minor, but just barely) have been very honest about what works, what doesn't work, what to keep, and what to let go of.

Santa never stopped coming to our house, he just evolved, and i think he can continue evolving instead of shrinking back down into the embryo he was when dd was ds2's age.

good luck, kbhlmh. still no news from me on the ttc front, which is just as well; my 44th birthday is coming up in February, my first conceived grandchild earned his/her wings last month, and i feel myself shifting gears in preparation for being the mom of a toddler and an appropriate (and not obtrusive) gramma for firstborn dgc in the not too distant future.

ds1 is partnered to a girl i like MUCH better than the young lady i was shopping for this time last year, who is now married.

that was a bit to wrap my mind around; ds isn't even seventeen yet! i'm so glad somebodty ELSE is the lucky groom and i feel much better about the new girlfriend.


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Not a lot to say today; winding down from the holidays. Dd had a wicked bad cold w/ fever for about a week; still isn't completely over it. Christmas Day was OK, though--her energy was coming back and she loved the presents.

Tomorrow, she starts a three day mini-camp--mornings only. I'd thought to use that time to deep clean the house--not!--but she announced yesterday that she wants me to stick around...we'll see how that goes.


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## Close2Me (Dec 9, 2008)

41 and turning 42 in January here with a 3mos old and 7yr old!!!!


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Close2Me* 
41 and turning 42 in January here with a 3mos old and 7yr old!!!!

Welcome to MDC and congratulations!!







:

I updated you to our front page post #1 of tribe members


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

I've had all three (four last night, counting dd's bf) kids under my roof for most of Christmas break and I'm in absolute heaven!

I didn't know they could make me this happy.

dd and I had a lot of heart-to-hearts this week about relatrionship issues (she's going through a few) and parts of her childhood th`at she understands now but didn't understand then.

ds1 is growing up nicely and introduced me to his new gf, who is a gem.

ds2 is morphing from infant to toddler.

I must be growing up too, because I don't want to change the world or show everybody who saidf I'd never amount to anything, i just want to keep living and watching these children grow and bloom and grow wings.

I also need to connect to other members of this tribe who have BOTH teens/adult kids and babies. I'll try to be better about following and post other updates than "How do I..." and "How did you solve this problem" type questions.


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

this is the first holiday season ds1 has been away from home. its sooo hard to cope with that. he's growing up and doing great though, so i cant ask for more...but man, i wish he was still little. lol!

the baby's first xmas was really low key. since we got hit with a huge ice storm and had no power for 9 days it took the fizzle out of the holidays at all. luckily we had a generator and all we couldnt do was cook on the oven or dry laundry..other than that we were all good and warm. still sucked though.

ds3 will be 3 on Thurs. oh where oh where does the time go??


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## Verygoddess (Jun 18, 2006)

The last part of the year is always busy for us with most of the kids birthdays falling in that time frame plus holidays. Now I am mom to a 14 yo boy, 12yo b oy ,9yo boy, 2yo girl and currently 5 months pregnant. We will hopefully find out the sex tuesday afternoon and final confirmation that everything is okay.
I never thought age would make a difference but I guess it does...well that and having alot of kids and homeschooling and having teens and preteens and toddlers and babies. Seems like I wear alot of different hats these days.


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## athansor (Feb 9, 2005)

Hi everyone
Haven't been keeping up with this thread much, but I'll try to read through it all today.
We had a great holiday here, and we're getting ready to travel to see my parents on Tuesday. However, we're holding our breath a bit, because my father in law is very ill and not likely to make it home from the hospital. I'm hoping he can recover, and it would be great if he got to see our new little ds.


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)




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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

*athansor* - I hope your FIL got to come home from the hospital and that everything is ok with him. Keep us updated as I am keeping him in my thoughts and prayers.

*Verygoddess* - OK, so will babe be a boy or girl?







: When is your EDD?

*PassionateWriter* - I hope the ice storm has passed and things are getting back to normal. Glad you were able to keep warm and cozy. Sometimes I wish I knew what an ice or snow storm was even like for that matter, but sadly I only know sunny days and summers as high as 116 degrees.









*noordinaryspider* - It sounds like you had an excellent Christmas. I'm so jealous...ours was cancelled because too many family members were horribly ill with the flu. Oh yeah, even the ones that apparently GOT the flu shot.

*claras_mom* - sorry to hear Dd was not feeling well on Christmas. : ( I'm glad she enjoyed her presents and by now she's probably back to her old self.







What type of camp was it - a daycare camp? just curious









*Jezzy* - How was your FL trip? Didn't know if you posted since then. I'm sure the weather was nice and how wonderful to be with family during the holidays









*kbhlmh* - Wondering how did the Clomid work?







: Do you know anything yet? I know you might have posted on the other over 40 TTC thread, but I just don't go there too much. I kinda feel out of place because I'm not doing any type of fertility stuff or temping and honestly don't even know that much about all of it.







: just hoping for the natural route







:

we'll be TTC again in mid-Mar. hopefully that'll give my DH enough time to at least cut back or get off his blood pressure meds. I've read that it can lower sperm count







Since his stroke right after Thanksgiving he's already lost about 25 lbs and is eating much better, cutting out sodium and bad fats. We really all need to start a regular exercise program since this is beneficial for just about eveything









*Happy New Year to Everyone!!!*


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## intentionalmama (Aug 23, 2008)

Hi, I would love to join in on the thread - it is so exciting to see the title. I am 46 and have a 5 1/2 year old ds. I have had 4 miscarriages since his birth. We are contemplating adopting a slightly older but younger than our boy. We will see. I am loving this mothering journey - the fun and the difficulties. Well, in hindsight (the difficulties). I have a couple of friends around my age with little ones -and I sure appreciate them. Look forward to joining in with you all. Lesley


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## athansor (Feb 9, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovbeingamommy* 
*athansor* - I hope your FIL got to come home from the hospital and that everything is ok with him. Keep us updated as I am keeping him in my thoughts and prayers.


Good news to report! FIL has been doing exceptionally well. He regained consciousness, has been sitting up, eating solid food, and recognizing people. He just left the hospital and is back at a senior home in his hometown. Thanks for all the thoughts and prayers!


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *athansor* 
Good news to report! FIL has been doing exceptionally well. He regained consciousness, has been sitting up, eating solid food, and recognizing people. He just left the hospital and is back at a senior home in his hometown. Thanks for all the thoughts and prayers!









:







:







:

That is especially wonderful news!!


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## ElliesMomma (Sep 21, 2006)

hi, i saw this thread and would like to join in if i may. i'm 40 and mom to a DD who is 2.75 years old. also DH and i are very newly pregnant with baby #2 EDD september 2009. i'll try to catch up on however many pages of posts here, but wanted to join now so i save the page. thanks!


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *intentionalmama* 
Hi, I would love to join in on the thread - it is so exciting to see the title. I am 46 and have a 5 1/2 year old ds. I have had 4 miscarriages since his birth. We are contemplating adopting a slightly older but younger than our boy. We will see. I am loving this mothering journey - the fun and the difficulties. Well, in hindsight (the difficulties). I have a couple of friends around my age with little ones -and I sure appreciate them. Look forward to joining in with you all. Lesley









to our tribe *Lesley*

I added you to the front page of members and will send out a friend request to you now. So glad that you found us...







:


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ElliesMomma* 
hi, i saw this thread and would like to join in if i may. i'm 40 and mom to a DD who is 2.75 years old. also DH and i are very newly pregnant with baby #2 EDD september 2009. i'll try to catch up on however many pages of posts here, but wanted to join now so i save the page. thanks!









*ElliesMomma* and Congratulations!








:







:







:

I've also updated you on the front page







and will send out a friend request soon. Are you already part of the Sept DDC?


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

:


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

im still around adn this has NOTHING to do w/ the fact that im 40 but man, having 2 little ones and tandem nursing is HARD. seriously. what was i thinking?


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## BelovedK (Jun 7, 2005)

Hi all







I want to join too !!! I am 42, and trying to conceive my 3rd DC I have been trying for 3 months and nothing yet







I do have a 13 yo and a 9yo.


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Welcome to all the new mamas!!!









*lovbeingamommy* We ot back home on thursday. the trip was long 28 hours frome door to door







:

It was very warm. Ash had a great time playing on the beach in the sand. She LOVED it! I had fun with my family. I just couldn't make my mother understand why I wouldn't be more comfortable nursing in the bathroom or under a cover.







That caused some problems. She kept saying "but I can see your browns"







I told her to quit looking then. She just doesn't get bfin'g. Oh well I am home now and I can bf as I please without feeling stared at by her. I love her I just can't be around her for to long


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## SkyMomma (Jul 13, 2006)

Hi Y'all, can I join? I'm 39.5 with 2 magical boys - 5yr old who is right now wearing a mask & bells & dancing wildly about the house singing his self-made song: "I am a circus perfoooormer". 3 month old mildly fussing & squirming in my lap as I write. Teething already, I think. Anyway, I was just feeling all sad & mournful this morning thinking that DS2 may be my last (getting too old, yk?), looked at MDC & found you all. Yay, MDC saves my day again, bringing hope for the future. So I know I don't officially meet the criteria, but will soon...can I come play too? Please?


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## Verygoddess (Jun 18, 2006)

*lovbeingamommy*- Its another healthy girl







: Thanks for asking









Now that that is over (and the holidays and birthdays) I guess its time to concentrate on the new arrival. My dh was very worried about AMA and birth defects and is now breathing easier.

*PassionateWriter*- Can you elaborate more on the tandem nursing. I am still nursing our 2yo and she doesn't show any signs of weaning so I expect I will be doing this soon. I can't figure out how Im going to nurse both at night. I will be 42 in june and still suprised we are pregnant again!


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

beloved K, hang in there. hope its soon..sending you sticky vibes.









jezzy, thats too bad.







oh well....glad you are home and dont have to deal with that again.

skymomma, of course and welcome!









very goddess, well, its a bit tough right now, is all. its certainly a HUGE commitment that i never realized before. ds3 is 3 yo now and nurses MORE than the newborn at times. i dont have issues at night b/c ds3 STTN now but daytime is a bit tough. i normally dont recommend weaning to anyone but im wondering, in my case, if it wouldnt have been better to have weaned ds3 before ds4 got here. i dont know though and dont have a crystal ball...maybe things woudl have been just as hard and i wouldnt have had nursing, who knows?? im just having a hard week! lol!

AMA - i cant stand that term. they always are making it lower and lower. used to be 40, then 35, some dr's want to say 30. whatever! lol!


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

Hi mamas! I'll be official in 2 days! (officially 40, that is!!!)







:

I wanted to share that I have "decided" (with deference to the fact that real life sometimes goes differently than what I decide) that I want to try to have another baby in a couple of years. I'm a single mama, and I was thinking I wouldn't want to do another solo, but I've changed my mind on that! Ever since I brought my daughter home from the hospital I've wanted to do it again! (When I was in the hosp., though, recovering from the c-section, my thoughts were something like "I'm never having sex again") Anyway, I was thinking of trying again when my daughter is about 3-ish, or when I have a feeling that I could take care of her and be pregnant again. I'd be 43 then. I just wanted to share these thoughts with you all, thanks for listening!!!!

Man, I love my little girl! Even if she did steal the show at my birthday party!


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kidzaplenty* 







:

Alright, no lurking allowed







Come and join us







: it's more fun that way


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Jezzy* 
Welcome to all the new mamas!!!









*lovbeingamommy* We ot back home on thursday. the trip was long 28 hours frome door to door







:

It was very warm. Ash had a great time playing on the beach in the sand. She LOVED it! I had fun with my family. I just couldn't make my mother understand why I wouldn't be more comfortable nursing in the bathroom or under a cover.







That caused some problems. She kept saying "but I can see your browns"







I told her to quit looking then. She just doesn't get bfin'g. Oh well I am home now and I can bf as I please without feeling stared at by her. I love her I just can't be around her for to long









WOW!! That's a long trip...glad everything worked out, well, except for the bf'ing issue. I know what you mean though my mom and dad were the same way...like I should be ashamed or something. Even my sister acted so embarressed because I bf.







:


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *SkyMomma* 
Hi Y'all, can I join? I'm 39.5 with 2 magical boys - 5yr old who is right now wearing a mask & bells & dancing wildly about the house singing his self-made song: "I am a circus perfoooormer". 3 month old mildly fussing & squirming in my lap as I write. Teething already, I think. Anyway, I was just feeling all sad & mournful this morning thinking that DS2 may be my last (getting too old, yk?), looked at MDC & found you all. Yay, MDC saves my day again, bringing hope for the future. So I know I don't officially meet the criteria, but will soon...can I come play too? Please?

















to our tribe. We're glad you found us







: As far as getting too old, heck no, my first DS was born when I was 40, then 2m/c's last yr







, but I'm going to keep on trying until meno hits, probably around 50 at least that's when my mom had hers. So just eat healthy food, exercise, take prenatals, and keep on trying.

I'm being really proactive now so when we start TTC again in mid-Mar (waiting because DH had a stroke in Nov.'08) my body will be in optimal shape. I currently go to a ND/midwife that has a lot of knowledge about things you can do increase your chances and have a sticky babe.









Sending some good baby







:


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *BelovedK* 
Hi all







I want to join too !!! I am 42, and trying to conceive my 3rd DC I have been trying for 3 months and nothing yet







I do have a 13 yo and a 9yo.









to our tribe.







: Glad you're here. Don't get discouraged...keep up the hope. Here's some sticky baby vibes for ya'







:

Also, I think you are also on the other over 40 thread that is uber active with TTC. I'm sure they would have lots of tips to help out with TTC. Good Luck!


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *hrsmom* 
Hi mamas! I'll be official in 2 days! (officially 40, that is!!!)







:

I wanted to share that I have "decided" (with deference to the fact that real life sometimes goes differently than what I decide) that I want to try to have another baby in a couple of years. I'm a single mama, and I was thinking I wouldn't want to do another solo, but I've changed my mind on that! Ever since I brought my daughter home from the hospital I've wanted to do it again! (When I was in the hosp., though, recovering from the c-section, my thoughts were something like "I'm never having sex again") Anyway, I was thinking of trying again when my daughter is about 3-ish, or when I have a feeling that I could take care of her and be pregnant again. I'd be 43 then. I just wanted to share these thoughts with you all, thanks for listening!!!!

Man, I love my little girl! Even if she did steal the show at my birthday party!









:














:














:









Great!!! You should definitely try again...maybe even before 43.







I wish you could talk with my sister, she just turned 40 and is single. She desperately wants a baby, but feels it's only achievable if she's married







I try to tell her that there's all sorts of options, but she doesn't seem interested. I just hope that when she's over 50 or so she doesn't look back with regret.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

ok nuf late night posts for me. I don't think I'll ever get that







done.


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovbeingamommy* 
Alright, no lurking allowed







Come and join us







: it's more fun that way









Didn't want to intrude, since I am ONLY 39 this year.









But wanted to hang out a bit since I am a GMPofAMA! Seems like I don't really fit anywhere else. You know the old, too old for here, too young for there, too many children for here, not enough for there!









This looks like a fun thread.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kidzaplenty* 
Didn't want to intrude, since I am ONLY 39 this year.









But wanted to hang out a bit since I am a GMPofAMA! Seems like I don't really fit anywhere else. You know the old, too old for here, too young for there, too many children for here, not enough for there!









This looks like a fun thread.

















already added you to the front page, Jenny!

Are you planning to TTC again soon? You are my hero, you know. If I could change just one thing in life it would of been to start having kids right when I was married. Yeah, it was 29, but geez I could've had about 7 or 8 already. So now that I'll be 44 in a few weeks I guess I'll settle for three more







. Of course, that's MY plan...but someone higher up, He may have a different plan...we'll see







But I really want write that book titled, Four in my Forties







:


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovbeingamommy* 







already added you to the front page, Jenny!

Are you planning to TTC again soon? You are my hero, you know. If I could change just one thing in life it would of been to start having kids right when I was married. Yeah, it was 29, but geez I could've had about 7 or 8 already. So now that I'll be 44 in a few weeks I guess I'll settle for three more







. Of course, that's MY plan...but someone higher up, He may have a different plan...we'll see







But I really want write that book titled, Four in my Forties







:

Thanks for the nice welcome!







It is great to have a place to call your own.









Funny you should ask about TTC. My DH just asked me today if I wanted any more after our very early mc for new years. (Since we are QF, we don't TTC, but we also don't TnTC.) And of course, I can't think of never having another baby. So, he just said to wait until after vacation (in April)!







(Last time we went of vacation I was 7 months pg, and not much fun!) Besides, we can't leave it at 9, can we? I really like even numbers, especially "10's" (a possible OCD thing).


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

lovebeingamommy, thanks for the birthday wishes and the encouragement! I did the math again, and I'll be 42 when my LO is 3, so that's what I was thinking, then I'd be 43 when I had my second. Maybe I could have TWO more babies!!! I just want to make sure I can take care of my dd. If I were to get pregnant right now, for example, it wouldn't be fair to her. (Unless our family suddenly expanded and there were people to help with things.) I'd be happy to talk to your sister if she wants to talk to someone! I was going to adopt about five years ago, and I specifically didn't want to be pregnant and unmarried (by myself, that is.) The adoption idea got put on the back burner, and I ended up single and pregnant anyway! We broke up when I was about two months pregnant, and we were only together for two months. It was fine! I should have just gotten pregnant way back when! But I'm so glad things turned out the way they did because I know Hannah and I were meant for each other!

I wish I had started sooner, too!


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Hrsmom,

sorry that I missed your birthday! A very happy belated birthday to you!







:


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## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

I'm glad you're here, Jenny! But what do these letters stand for? --

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kidzaplenty* 
But wanted to hang out a bit since I am a GMPofAMA!


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## THANKFULFORFIVE (Jan 8, 2009)

OOhh, please add me to this tribe! I've been looking for you all!
~Billie 41


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *THANKFULFORFIVE* 
OOhh, please add me to this tribe! I've been looking for you all!
~Billie 41









Billie!! WoW FIVE, you're a lucky mama







:







:

adding you to the front page now. Glad you're here

-Kate


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mammal_mama* 
I'm glad you're here, Jenny! But what do these letters stand for? --

I believe she means "Grand Multipara of Advanced Maternal Age."

Jenny, I'm another one of your "fans" as you know; I'm glad to see you here even though you are a little kid of 39.









I'm less than a month away from 44; that seems so much older than 43 and TTCing to birth after 45 seems like.....well, a crazy fantasy!

I am so, so glad I went ahead and had my little boy when I did even though my circumstances weren't perfect. The thought of a world without him in it makes me shuidder.


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *noordinaryspider* 
I believe she means "Grand Multipara of Advanced Maternal Age."

This is it!







I have been called that for my last two babies, and I have not even passed the 40 year mark.

I shutter to think what they will call me in a couple of years when I get pg.

Really Grand Multipara of Very Advanced Maternal Age.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kidzaplenty* 
This is it!







I have been called that for my last two babies, and I have not even passed the 40 year mark.

I shutter to think what they will call me in a couple of years when I get pg.

Really Grand Multipara of Very Advanced Maternal Age.


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Welcome THANKFULFORFIVE


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## CathMac (Jan 10, 2006)

Hello,
Please add me to the list.

To use a mixed metaphor, DD1 was the buzzer beater that put me into overtime.

I am 43. I had 4 1/2 yo DD1 when I was 39. The ObGyn kept reminding me of the risk factors for my age and when I said I was only 38 he pointed out --in a very solemn tone-- that I would be 39 when I had her.

The advanced maternal age was even more of an issue with DD2. She is 2 1/2 (22 months younger than her sister) and I had her a couple of months before my 41st birthday. When going in for the ever more frequent non-stress test towards the end they would ask the routine question, "why are you here" and I would simply say "because I'm ancient".

If I had more time energy and money I wouldn't mind a third but at the ripe old age of 43 1/2 I think I'm done, but very grateful for the two that I have.

~Cath


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *CathMac* 
they would ask the routine question, "why are you here" and I would simply say "because I'm ancient".









I will have to remember this one!


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

*CathMac* - Glad you're here!

I updated you to the front page.

And...I'll be 44 this month and I know I'm not done







: I keep telling myself...there's great eggs left, there's great eggs left, and clicking my heels three times each day







Has to work, right?


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

Just wondering. Where does everyone see themselves as their last child "finally" grows up?









Me? I just told #1 that I expect to be 69 and pg!







Wouldn't that be a sight?

But really, I know my Mom did not hit minipause until around age 55. So that means I could have another 15 YEARS of having babies!







:

And if I follow my "every other year" that means seven more? Sounds really fun!









But, one day, I want to be "Gramma", and I want my children's children to beg to come to my place to sit and watch me bake pies and cakes, and sit on my lap as I read them stories. I want to give them the whole "Grandmother" package that I never got.

And with my oldest being 18, It could be much closer than I think!


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

i'm looking forward to being "Gramma" too. It's a different kind of "baby hunger" and Terran's birth didn't make it go away. One problem is that I don't have very many kids so I only have one dd. I'll be thrilled to have grandbabies by my sons and hope that they are involved fathers, but that's not the same as a matrilinear grandbaby, kwim?

I was a SAHM/homeschooling parent until ds was fifteen (her's now seventeen) so I already know how the mainstream world will judge me. I'm sure I'll be firmly planted outside the mainstream by then and, with the threat of CPS removed, will undoubtedly kick up my heels a bit: go back to volunteering with Food not Bombs, buy some land and live in an alternative shelter (travel trailer, cabin, , etc.) that I'd be skeered to live in with a minor child, travel, get arrested for civil disobedience, heck, follow the Grateful Dead's grandbabies if I want to or hitchhike to Wisconsin and Hawaii since I already thumbed my way around the other 48 in my teens and 20s.

I also want to write and sell some sort of craft/artwork, even if I only make enough to buy the materials for my next project.

I'd like to sort out my sexuality, even if it requires some sort of psychotherapy, and experience a completely self-indulgent love affair that doesn't have to last and doesn't have to be in my kids' best interest.

I want to build a desktop PC from scratch and learn a bit of programming (Linux, not windoze).

I'll be pretty close to 65, even if Terran is my last, so I'd just as soon wait until then to go back to school so i won't have to pay tuition.

I'm sure I'll find plenty of trouble to get into and adventures to have, I'm just so not ready for it NOW and thank the heavens every day for this brief reprieve. I didn't like "not having children" when my younger teen was living on the streets and adult dd and I were too busy working multiple crappy part time minimum wage jobs to interact with each other much.

It's an interesting perspective. I still WOH with Terran along in a carrier and still volunteer and really don't feel deprived of the things I can't do with a baby in tow. Now that I have a "busy busy toddler" and am entering those years where mamas almost never sit down, I still can't think of anything In really want to do that i can't that i don't mind waiting for.

There are people in my life who i haven't told about Terran because they would not be supportive. The life they think I live sounds so sad: that of an overworked, self-loathing "crazy cat lady" in a navy polyester pantsuit and "little old lady poodle-doo" with a pocket ful of regrets who resembles me far less than she does Eleanor Rigby in the Beatles song by the same name.

So I guess what i'm trying to say is that I've seen the grass with my own two eyes and it really isn't greener.


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovbeingamommy* 
*claras_mom* - sorry to hear Dd was not feeling well on Christmas. : ( I'm glad she enjoyed her presents and by now she's probably back to her old self.







What type of camp was it - a daycare camp? just curious









It was a combination of art, music, and dance--masterminded, I think, by a KidzArt and a Kindermusik franchise here in town, probably to help promote a combination class starting after the holidays.







But both have studios in an art center that also has dance (one of the local independent studios) so there was also that. Dd liked it, but not the dance part--go figure! she loves the dance teacher who comes to her daycare each week--and really didn't want me to be gone the whole time. Soooo, I ended up running errands, then hanging out in the (very cold) hallway for the rest of the time. And she's once again declined to be enrolled in any kindermusik class, even though I offered the art/music thing. It's really hard to consider forcing the issue on something that can be such a big ongoing expense.









I had the idea that after more than a week at home with dh and I, away from her normal routine and friends, she'd enjoy a change--and I'd enjoy the time to myself--but basically it was a draw. I think that three hours (total), with lots of movement in the music portion, and then a hip-hop sort of thing for an hour at the end, was just too much. Too loud, too tiring, too much, especially since she was still kind of getting over the cold (or flu) she'd had the week before.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *PassionateWriter* 
im still around adn this has NOTHING to do w/ the fact that im 40 but man, having 2 little ones and tandem nursing is HARD. seriously. what was i thinking?

Dd is slowing down, but I've a feeling I'll be doing some tandem nursing, something I _never even imagined_ four years ago. My second is due in April (I'm 44, by the way; 45 in July), and we've had some long talks about who gets first dibs and why....I just hope I can survive it.


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## ZanZansMommy (Nov 8, 2003)

Hi everyone,

I think I need to be here. I'm 41 & just entering peri-menopause & it sucks. I feel like I'm 91. DS3 just stopped nursing, at my insistance & I feel like I've gotten worse since weaning. Anyone else?

DH & I are very happy with our 2, DD is 5 yrs old, but since hitting the change, I can't quite get over the fact that my days of *possibly* being pregnant are closing in...UGH

Anyhow, just looking for a common group. Thanks.


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## mbbinsc (May 8, 2008)

ZanZansmommy, I understand. I had DD when I was 44, I'll be 48 next month. She is still nursing (though I believe my supply is very low). She has severe food allergies, so I have not pushed the weaning. I started having hot flashes this summer and periods are all but gone. There have been some recent discussion on health and healing forum. I do take Evening primrose oil (took for her skin and got added benefit for me). I added Magnesium and have had fewer and less intense hot flashes. At least, this phase of my life will be over before my 10 yo DS starts hitting puberty.


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## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

I keep hoping I'll have periods a while longer so my dd's and me can experience them together.









But if they start at 12 like I did, that'll make me 48 when dd1 starts and 53 when dd2 starts. I guess it's not impossible.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Oh no, don't scare me with menopause







:. I know it's different for everyone, but doesn't it generally come around the time that your mom experienced hers? I have no signs of anything yet a almost 44 and still regular 28-30 day cycles. I hope that's a good sign.









*Kidzaplenty* - Remember, I'm hoping fo three more, but we'll see what happens







So even if I have my last one at 49 that leaves me at 67 when they're ready to leave for college. So retirement will probably be in full swing, and hoping to travel the world with kids and small grandkids. I think it's doable (is that a word?) considering my mom and grandma are still living (grandma just turned 90) and my great-grandma lived til 92 and great-great was 80 something before she fell in a well and died







so who knows how long she would have lived.

*ZanZansMommy* Glad you found us


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## THANKFULFORFIVE (Jan 8, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kidzaplenty* 
Just wondering. Where does everyone see themselves as their last child "finally" grows up?









Me? I just told #1 that I expect to be 69 and pg!







Wouldn't that be a sight?

But really, I know my Mom did not hit minipause until around age 55. So that means I could have another 15 YEARS of having babies!







:

And if I follow my "every other year" that means seven more? Sounds really fun!









But, one day, I want to be "Gramma", and I want my children's children to beg to come to my place to sit and watch me bake pies and cakes, and sit on my lap as I read them stories. I want to give them the whole "Grandmother" package that I never got.

And with my oldest being 18, It could be much closer than I think!

Just like you...probably pregnant again. Having babes the same time my kids are!! How cool would it be for them to grow up together?


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## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovbeingamommy* 
Oh no, don't scare me with menopause







:. I know it's different for everyone, but doesn't it generally come around the time that your mom experienced hers?

My mom had her uterus taken out when she was 41, shortly after she gave birth to my brother, because the doctor said it had dropped, and that that was what was causing her some problems with frequent urination.

My dad also recalled him saying that he'd just dealt with a tubal pregnancy on another older women, and he didn't want any more of his patients having babies in their forties. Which makes me wonder about his true motives.

Anyhow, it also means I have no idea when I'll go through menopause. I did start menstruating a few years earlier than my mom did. I was 12 1/2; she was 17.


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## allgirls (Apr 16, 2004)

Hi! I've been meaning to subscribe to this thread for a while but I've had computer problems but I'm back(I think the problems are fixed).

So I will be 43 in April, my youngest is 3 and my oldest is 18 and expecting her first in September...so I will be a grandma soon







:

I'm working on my health...I need a lot of energy to keep up with 3 kids still at home and a grandchild. I'm hoping for a grandson and so is my dh but we love little girls so much that it's gonna be great no matter what.

So hi everybody


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## mammal_mama (Aug 27, 2006)

Hi, allgirls!







Congratulations on becoming a grandma!


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kidzaplenty* 
Just wondering. Where does everyone see themselves as their last child "finally" grows up?









Considering I'll have a couple years before social security kicks in (though only a couple), I may still be working. Or maybe I'll take early retirement and spend my days gardening, quilting, and writing music.

Then again, that consideration is based on the youngest turning 18 when I'm 63, so we'll still have university to get through and possibly even grad school. I know there are big debates/differences of opinion about parents paying for college and especially for grad school, but my parents helped me all the way through (not the whole cost, but at least some support at all times) and I can't imagine not doing the same for my kids.

We won't wait until then to travel. Dh's business takes him on international trips every 2-3 years; I've gone whenever I can and we take dd. It will be a little more complicated with two, but I think we can manage. And we do a lot of traveling in the states to visit family; be nice to start camping on some of the road trips.


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

Hi everyone! allgirls, congratulations on becoming a grandma! Such a special relationship!

I like the question where do we see ourselves when our kids grow up. Are we talking 18? I'll be in my late 50's/early 60's, and hoping that my child/children start having babies at a young age!!







Otherwise, no idea at all! I've really done all the things I want to do, with the exception of viewing a total solar eclipse and spending several weeks or months in Mexico. I'd like to do those things with my daughter, though.

I love coming here for perspective!

p.s. clara's mom, where are you? I'm in SLO county, one of the places that considers itself the central coast of CA!


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

I alway picture "grown up" as "on their own" and at least semi-self supportive, usually 18-24. I figure I will be 60 or so when my youngest is grown up, that is, unless I have more!









I might like to travel a bit when I get there. Although I would just as soon take the children with me as we travel (in different rooms, of course!).

I want to go to Ireland and Australia.

Then, I want to own a house in the mountains and one on the ocean front somewhere, maybe Maine (with big glass windows facing the water). That is where my grandchildren can come and play with me.


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## jrabbit (May 10, 2008)

I'd like to join in ... I'm presently 42 with 3 girls ... 9, 4y11mo, and 10 days.

I've been on bed rest, recovering from a traumatic birth, but today, I decided to explore MDC a little, and I found this thread. I don't know many moms my age, and it's complicated by the fact that I am in a mid-life crux - not knowing where we're going from here, wanting to travel, maybe wanting another baby, thinking about a new direction of my own after owning a resale shop for 6 years. But for now, I have to be content to "sit" and "exist" - because my health depends on it. And that is extremely hard for me, as I'm a serious workaholic. (ask anyone in the Dec DDC ... I was crazy busy til 40 weeks pregnant)

Where will I be when my youngest is grown? I hope that I'm as healthy and full-of-life as my mother, who is 20 years older than me. She went to medical school when she turned 40, and she's in the prime of her life now. I can envision her still having the energy to deal with kids & college - but other women in their 60s? Not so full of life. I do worry sometimes that I waited too long to be a mom, but I think I'm a better mom because of it.

Well, it's bed-time for mama, so I'll just end this now.
--janis


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

*allgirls*

*jrabbit*

Glad you found our thread...sometimes it gets buried a little and one of us needs to give it a gentle







, but it keeps on going.


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *hrsmom* 
p.s. clara's mom, where are you? I'm in SLO county, one of the places that considers itself the central coast of CA!

Santa Barbara.







I sometimes think about saying "South Coast"....since that narrows things down considerably.

I'm having a hard time getting motivated today. If I want to find parking near my office, I need to leave within the next 2.5 minutes (more or less







), but really, I'd just like to stay home, watch the inauguration, and have a day to do exactly as I wish. Dh will be out of town this Saturday through next Thursday, so I'm sort of dreading that. Dd and I will be fine--but there will be no respite.


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

I really do not feel old at all. But I was wondering, What is the hardest thing about being "older" and having babies?

Is it the lack of energy?
The lack of physical flexibility?
The idea of being "old enough to be a grandma"?
The worry of becoming incompacitated or dying before you children are old enough to remember you or take care of themselves?
Or is just knowing you are giving up your "ripe old age" to chase after children, a time when others are retiring, and you are adding more responsibility?


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kidzaplenty* 
I really do not feel old at all. But I was wondering, What is the hardest thing about being "older" and having babies?

Is it the lack of energy?
The lack of physical flexibility?
The idea of being "old enough to be a grandma"?
The worry of becoming incompacitated or dying before you children are old enough to remember you or take care of themselves?
Or is just knowing you are giving up your "ripe old age" to chase after children, a time when others are retiring, and you are adding more responsibility?

No lack of energy or physical flexibility because of daily meditation and exercise. I don't know...I kind of feel proud to be an older mama. When I was pregnant at 40 I would always say, 'Yeah, I'm pregnant AND I'm 40!" Same thing at 43, although didn't get to be pregnant too long







. When we TTC in March







: I hope I'll be saying the same thing with even more emphasis on the "44" part. And who knows what will happen to anyone in the future, I try not to worry too much about that. I'll be eligible for retirement at 56 being a teacher and DH owns a company so he can do what he wants about retiring. What I'd like to do in about 12 yrs (mid 50's) is travel North America in an RV with our DC while unschooling. That's the ultimate for me. I know that there's a few lucky mamas on MDC that do this now and I'm so envious.


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## THANKFULFORFIVE (Jan 8, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kidzaplenty* 
I really do not feel old at all. But I was wondering, What is the hardest thing about being "older" and having babies?

Is it the lack of energy?
The lack of physical flexibility?
The idea of being "old enough to be a grandma"?
The worry of becoming incompacitated or dying before you children are old enough to remember you or take care of themselves?
Or is just knowing you are giving up your "ripe old age" to chase after children, a time when others are retiring, and you are adding more responsibility?

I don't feel any older "in my head", but I really feel physically older. For me it's definitely a worry that I'm not as energetic as I felt in my 20's and 30's. I was disappointed in how my body reacted to being pregnant at 40 and wonder if maybe that is the reason fewer women have babies at our age and it was something I was in denial about? I really don't want to think that I'm too "old" to have more babies.


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kidzaplenty* 
I really do not feel old at all. But I was wondering, What is the hardest thing about being "older" and having babies?

Is it the lack of energy?
The lack of physical flexibility?
The idea of being "old enough to be a grandma"?
The worry of becoming incompacitated or dying before you children are old enough to remember you or take care of themselves?
Or is just knowing you are giving up your "ripe old age" to chase after children, a time when others are retiring, and you are adding more responsibility?

but....but...but....It's NOT harder, at least not so far! I'm the one with the 16 year age gap between my two youngest. I never wanted to be an "older mom" because most of my friends were at least ten years older than me and they just didn't seem up to the physical challenges of playing with they're children or the intellectual challenge of remembering their own childhoods well enough to see things from their kids' points of view.

The first problem is a fitness issue, not an age issue. i parked my car and rode my bike during my pregnancy and also took a dance class for fun. i don't work out, but i do appreciate the fact that my body needs exercise and try to work that exercise into my daily life. i'm also reaping the benefits of my "weird" vegetarian/whole foods diet, living with a dd who is a dance major and has completed the coursework to become a personal trainer, and some of it is just plain dumb luck, but my body works fine, probably better than it did in the days when i worried about whether or not it was a fashionable shape and weight. i wear ds several hours a day in a woven wrap, walk acrioss town twice a week, carry my own groceries home from the store, and greatly look forward to "rassling" with my little boy!

My second trepidation also doesn't seem like it will come to pass. i think i remember my own childhood just fine, but many incidents and issues have been seen friom the role of parent as well as child. i have had time to process experiences and put them in perspective, i.e., i not only remember what it was like to be a naughty little girl who misbehaved during martini hour and gave her father headaches, i also know what it's like to be an adult child of alcoholics in such a heavy state of denial that i'd rather blame myself than deal with reality.

i know how fast childhood goes and how deep childhood wounds can cut so i'm more inclined not to worry about the dirty house and disapproving strangers when my kids need me. i know that the bad times won't last, but neither will the good times. i know i'll never sing on stage again or change the world, but that i will get more pleasure out of sitting in a beam of sunlight or eating an apricot or looking at my baby smile than my 23 year old self could have imagined.

Sure, my parents and certain acquaintances probably wish they could force me to trade my purple patchwork for a navy blue polyester pantsuit and my salt and pepper pigtails for a little old lady poodle-doo in Miss Clairol #1678950780 but ther years haven't made me any less me and tghe criticisms have lost their sting as I look at their source and thank the heavens that I don't have to live the lonely lives those people have chosen for themselves.

I'm okay with being "old enough to be a grandma" and love reassuring people who mistake me for ds's gramma that it is an honest mistake, I am not offended, and that there is nothing to apologize for. I hope he does have a neice or nephew to play with when he gets a bit older.

I'm thrilled to find "children my own age" who have kids ds's age, buyt I also find that I enjoy the company of parents in their 20s and 30s almost as much as they enjoy me. I'm still open to learning from them so I do and it feels so good when they learn from my mistakes and avoid making mistakes of their own.

I can't get over how much easier the year of infancy is without all the undermining and disrespect that younger parents have to deal with. When dd was born, a friend knocked on my door, walked in with a television set in her arms, and started rearranging my bedroom furniture to fibnd an electrical outlet. When i told her that I didn't watch TV, she said, "You do now. Your favourite show is Oprah."

When ds was born and a friend asked if she could throw me a baby shower, I said I already made all the clothes he needed and I was very picky about toys. She replied that i was a wonderful, creative, and dedicated mom, told me to sleep well, and said she was looking forward to seeing ds when I was ready to go back to my office job.

I don't really think I parent ds that differently from the way i wanted to parent dd and ds1 and I don't really think that 23 is a "young mom", but it has been so much easier this time around that I want to laugh and then i want to go do some sort of volunteer work to help teen moms.

I was a SAHM with my older kids; I WOH and volunteer with ds in the wrap. I was married to my older kids' father; I am a single mami by choice with ds2. I am in a much lower income tax bracket now. It's still easier.

One concern you raised that is real and does make me wistful is my own mortality. It's a selfish worry, because I do know that people die at all stages of life and I'm sure that dd or ds1 would make a far better substitute parent than my mother would have if i had died in my 30s. The thing is that I want to live to see my children grow up and my definition of "grown up" has changed. I wanted to live to see dd at 23, and I'm pretty sure I will. I want to live to see ds2 at 45, which I may since I have had relatives survive into their 90s.

I'm sure he'll be an amazing man whether I live to see it or not.

Apologies for typos; I need to get off the computer now.


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## jrabbit (May 10, 2008)

I am 42, and I think I'm actually healthier and more active now than ever before. I battled severe depression for 2 years, right about 40yo. At that time, I came really close to giving up a few times, but we worked through it (obviously). One thing that kept me optimistic at the worst of it was the dream of having another baby. I talked about it quite a lot with my psychiatrist, who encouraged me to focus on that as a goal. Well, when I was finally feeling better at the beginning of last year, I sort of mis-counted the dates one month ... and here we are.







Anyway, my point is that this was absolutely the best pregnancy I could have ever imagined. (Toward the end, I began imagining doing it again, it was so great!) Pregnancy photos: http://philhyde.smugmug.com/gallery/...42795395_CCsZU

I was all upbeat about this email ... until I looked at my pregnancy photos. I had an emergency c-s, which has left me severely depressed. I lost something huge. I hadn't been able to look at my pregnancy photos, and I guess I wasn't really ready to look at them today ... this is me "this week" watching my older daughters chasing butterflies: http://philhyde.smugmug.com/gallery/...57270638_wWrJ5

I don't know how long it will take to regain my sense of well-being, but I am optimistic. I was in such a good place a few weeks ago. I have to get back there somehow. I look at my daughters, and they remind me of who I am and what is important. I've been writing about my experience, trying to get to a point where I can accept it. lostmother.blogspot.com

But, back to my original point. Here I am at 42 - I don't feel too old for my life. Some days, I can really see the age difference between myself and my peers, but it's usually blurry. I'm very energetic and active. I see women 10 years younger than me who are not nearly as healthy as I am. I think I owe it somewhat to good genes, but more to a healthy lifestyle. And I'm even contemplating having another baby!

Zoe might be waking up now ... I guess that's enough self-analysis for today.

--janis


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kidzaplenty* 
I really do not feel old at all. But I was wondering, What is the hardest thing about being "older" and having babies?

Is it the lack of energy?
The lack of physical flexibility?
The idea of being "old enough to be a grandma"?
The worry of becoming incompacitated or dying before you children are old enough to remember you or take care of themselves?
Or is just knowing you are giving up your "ripe old age" to chase after children, a time when others are retiring, and you are adding more responsibility?

Sometimes I'm sad about lost time--meaning....wanting to have all the time in the world with my kids; watching them grow into adults; enjoying that. But you know? I didn't meet someone I was willing to share my life with and have kids with until my late thirties. And I wouldn't change that for anything (even on the days when dh annoys the crap out of me







), so there you are. Life happens.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jrabbit* 
I am 42, and I think I'm actually healthier and more active now than ever before. I battled severe depression for 2 years, right about 40yo. At that time, I came really close to giving up a few times, but we worked through it (obviously). One thing that kept me optimistic at the worst of it was the dream of having another baby. I talked about it quite a lot with my psychiatrist, who encouraged me to focus on that as a goal. Well, when I was finally feeling better at the beginning of last year, I sort of mis-counted the dates one month ... and here we are.







Anyway, my point is that this was absolutely the best pregnancy I could have ever imagined. (Toward the end, I began imagining doing it again, it was so great!) Pregnancy photos: http://philhyde.smugmug.com/gallery/...42795395_CCsZU

I was all upbeat about this email ... until I looked at my pregnancy photos. I had an emergency c-s, which has left me severely depressed. I lost something huge. I hadn't been able to look at my pregnancy photos, and I guess I wasn't really ready to look at them today ... this is me "this week" watching my older daughters chasing butterflies: http://philhyde.smugmug.com/gallery/...57270638_wWrJ5

I don't know how long it will take to regain my sense of well-being, but I am optimistic. I was in such a good place a few weeks ago. I have to get back there somehow. I look at my daughters, and they remind me of who I am and what is important. I've been writing about my experience, trying to get to a point where I can accept it. lostmother.blogspot.com

--janis

Janis...







:

I've been there (recovering emotionally from a c/s). It gets better. Just let yourself grieve. And if it--the depression--seems to move from the natural process of grief into something different, then you know what to do--it sounds as if you've a good psychiatrist to work with.

I've dealt with depression off and on for years. One thing that's always stuck in my mind is my doctor telling me that people who suffer from clinical depression can be more succeptible to the kinds of lows that come from everyday stress. And an emergency c/s is far from everyday stress.


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## kbhlmh (Nov 6, 2008)

Quote:

I really do not feel old at all. But I was wondering, What is the hardest thing about being "older" and having babies?

Is it the lack of energy?
The lack of physical flexibility?
The idea of being "old enough to be a grandma"?
The worry of becoming incompacitated or dying before you children are old enough to remember you or take care of themselves?
Or is just knowing you are giving up your "ripe old age" to chase after children, a time when others are retiring, and you are adding more responsibility?
Without a doubt, for me my biggest concern is "The worry of becoming incompacitated or dying before you children are old enough to remember you or take care of themselves? "


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## juneau (May 20, 2005)

Hello everyone. I found this thread by following *noordinaryspider* (hi spider!). I wanted to tell her about my dd's birth just over a week ago!

Anyhow, I'm juneau, age 45, and I just had my second child. I was never pregnant at all in my 30s, despite trying desperately for about five years, but my 40s have been fecund, if also filled with loss (five pregnancies, three losses).

*Clara'smom*, our children have a very similar age gap and you and I are also about the same age. Dd1 is still nursing, and so far, has been very respectful of my limits in tandem nursing. She's actually very helpful when I'm engorged.

My second dd was born January 12, and she is perfect in every way. I'm loving snuggling with her, and nursing is going really well. She's teeny tiny (6 lb, 13, oz at birth), which is how I like 'em.







Like *Janis*, I'm also recovering from a C-section, although mine wasn't traumatic emotionally. Just hard physically, since I was feeling so great at the end of my pregnancy and now I have to struggle to move around.

I feel trapped in the house because of cold







: and ice and snow. I am afraid of falling outside and also not very keen to subject dd2 to the temps. So we are hunkered down inside until spring, I guess. Or at least until my next dr's appointment.









No warming trend in sight, and I can measure the icicles hanging from my roof in feet, not inches. This is one time when I do envy you southern Californians!

As far as what's hard about being an older mom? For me, none of the things suggested. The only thing that's hard for me is my neighbors and friends who are the same age as I am have kids in high school and college. There's just not that much I have in common with them.


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Welcome Juneau! Congratulations on your baby


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *juneau* 
*Clara'smom*, our children have a very similar age gap and you and I are also about the same age. Dd1 is still nursing, and so far, has been very respectful of my limits in tandem nursing. She's actually very helpful when I'm engorged.

I think dd will be okay with it--it occurred to me one day that she's going to love the surge in milk supply, because no matter what she says, I can't imagine she's getting much milk. She's just turned 4 and right now seems dedicated to pushing all of our buttons all the time--testing those limits, right on schedule!--but is also showing sure signs of empathy and budding cooperation.







She's a good kid....

Quote:

As far as what's hard about being an older mom? For me, none of the things suggested. The only thing that's hard for me is my neighbors and friends who are the same age as I am have kids in high school and college. There's just not that much I have in common with them.
I forgot about this one. But yes, I definitely experience it. Fortunately, we usually manage to find other things to talk about.


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

*Juneau*, congratulations! I was actually "stalking" you on the TTC forum so i knew that dd2 had been born, but i've kind of lost my "cool, thoughtful internet friend" status now that ds is a busy busy toddler so i haven't read your birth story yet.

I'm so thrilled for you! 45 is looming on the horizon for me and i still don't have ppaf back yet.

i haven't really made a decision about whether to ttc again yet even though i sometimes think i have.

i hear you about the friends with older kids thing; the 16 year age gap makes things so crazy for me. Some of the "toddler parents" i mentored when they first started homeschooling have become my mentors at 21st century parenting and other people who i thought would be significant have moved on to the new adventures of mothering their preteens and i just don't have anything in common with them any more.

I think i've made some good friends on my mdc ddc, but since some of them are closer to dd's age than my own, i need to be careful not to come off like a know-it-all busybody.

I was insulted, ridiculed, and unanimously "voted off the island" by one group of mainstream parents with children ds2's age. good riddance.

*Clara'smom* i tandemed my older kids and was pretty much dried up at the end too. iirc dd loved the milk surge and it really helped her to have positive associations with her brother. it was overwhelming at times, but so, so worth it.


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## jrabbit (May 10, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *noordinaryspider* 
i need to be careful not to come off like a know-it-all busybody.

there's a flamefest thread on my mainstream ddc where i was unanimously "voted off the island" and asked not to post any more. good riddance.

my goodness, that sounds childish!

I also have issues with feeling like I'm in a different generation than most similar-stage moms It makes me contemplate my life. Each different stage, I've been slightly older than my peers, getting progressively older along the way: I was an exchange student after high school, so I went to a Finnish high school with kids 1-4 years younger than me, then started college one year after "normal", then spent 2 years traveling around the world, so I started grad school 5 years after "normal", then became involved in animal-welfare, a good 5+ years older than most everyone else (or 20 years younger), then got married at 31, and so on ... now, I've got a newborn, and I don't know anyone my age anymore. I owned a children's resale shop for 6 years, and most of the customers were 10-20 years younger than me, and my employees were, too. To further complicate things, I don't look my age! (not complaining) nor, do I act my age, I guess!

My mother went to medical school when she was 40, so I was influenced by a woman who was ambitious and wouldn't listen to her peers. I remember how frustrated she was when well-meaning people told her that it wouldn't be difficult getting into med school until she was over 35. Not a whole lot different than people who whine to me about being too old to have babies ... and they are 10 years younger than me ...

I am not sure what my point is anymore. My oldest DD is throwing a temper tantrum because I won't stop what I'm doing to help her do something. Middle DD is mocking her. DH is irritated. DD3 is nursing. No brain function is left!

There is talk of a local group of "over-40" AP moms getting together. I can't decide if I think that segregating myself from younger moms is a good thing. Their motivation was that they wanted to be with women who may be in the same peri-menopausal category. But do I want to admit that menopause is my next stage?

--janis


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## SkyMomma (Jul 13, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kidzaplenty* 
I really do not feel old at all. But I was wondering, What is the hardest thing about being "older" and having babies?

Is it the lack of energy?
The lack of physical flexibility?
The idea of being "old enough to be a grandma"?
The worry of becoming incompacitated or dying before you children are old enough to remember you or take care of themselves?
Or is just knowing you are giving up your "ripe old age" to chase after children, a time when others are retiring, and you are adding more responsibility?

nak

I was going to post a similiar question







I don't feel older on the inside--in fact most of my mom friends are 10 years younger than I...this has to do with parenting choices & class/$$ differences, I've found. Most of the moms my age, in my area at least, seem to have more $$, be more settled & more conventoinal than I am (present company excepted, of course







). I do find the physical energy thing hard -- yes when I take care of myself my energy improves, but there was a major difference between my pregnancy & post-partum with DS1 @ 34-5 & my pregnancy & post-partum with DS2 @ 38-9. THose 5 years really seemed to make a difference.

But really the hardest thing for me is knowing that the clock is ticking on any future children I might wish to have







- I think if I had the time, $$, space & energy I'd have at least 4 more more kids. (and this after being up from 1:00AM on with 2 different fussy kids. And a baby who will not sleep today unless being walked in the sling. Mamas, my poor body is TIRED today!)


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

Yea, I've got the $$$/classism issues big time. I was a SAHM/homeschooler with my big kids and just barely getting my "career" as as home health care worker started (it's still going, just fewer clients and ds comes to work with me) so I know that I will always be poor, probably have a stint of homelessness/nomadism in my future and the vast majority of my 40+ online friendships would flop dismally if i ever tried to take them offline so I just enjoy them for what they are and appreciate in a "That's so sweet of you" way any irrelevant advice on career, grad school, retirement planning, home ownership etc.

i like the way the internet can break down class barriers.

Having Terran and selling my "grandfather's good solid blue chip stocks" to keep him out of day care as long as i can marked my complete departure from the superficial suburban upbringing of my childhood. I donated my "middle class" costumes to the thrift store and started wearing things I LIKE and even sewing a bit. I'm a full time barefooter now and I'm even back to wearing my hair in twin braids.

There are lots of women my age who look like me where I live (Humboldt County, CA) but my parents would be HORRIFIED and probably try to have me commited to an insane asylum.

I don't care. I'm tired of wearing a mask all the time.

I also refuse to pretend to be ashamed of what I jhave done with my adult life so far. I worked my tail off homeschooling these kids under extremely adverse conditions. I'm darned proud of dd and still have hope for ds1.

Why am i supposed to be ashamed of not abandoning them to chase after a stupid paycheck anyway?


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## juneau (May 20, 2005)

*Noordinaryspider*, I didn't really post a birth story because there's not much to tell. I had a scheduled C-section at 39w5d because of extensive surgery during dd1's birth. I'm a little sad that I'll never experience a vaginal birth, or even labor, but I've made peace with it. The recovery sucks, though.

I did get a lot of the things that I wanted during delivery and in the hospital. Number one was a very good friend as first assistant, two was not letting dd2 out of my sight, three was not letting anyone tell me the sex and discovering it for myself.

I ended up getting out of the house today rather sooner than I expected because my incision was very obviously infected.







So dh drove me and dd2 to the doctor, and then we stayed in the area and had lunch. Dd2 was the star attraction at the restaurant. It makes me nervous to have had her out in public at 10 days old, but my mom took me on a cross-country plane flight (by herself!) when I was this age. I still can't believe it.

In re looking or not looking one's age: I, too, look much younger than I am. My dh is almost five years younger than me and easily looks five years older, so I suppose I look about 10 years younger than my age. I come by it honestly; a neighbor came by the other day and thought my dad (who looks about 25 years younger than his 72 years) was my older brother!

*Janis*, I am having a hard time with my older dd. I just have no patience for her right now.


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

Hi- Wow, some amazing posts since the last time I was here! I love reading about the introspection and hearing some stories similar to mine.

jrabbit- I read your blog. I had a planned homebirth turn into a c-section. I felt like I lost a lot, too. Definitely a time of grief. It gets better, for sure! I hated hearing "c-section babies always come out so pretty"- for some reason that really bugged me. Like the only reason my daughter was beautiful was because she wasn't born vaginally. I'm so glad I don't hear that anymore! I also had someone poo-poo the idea of grieving after a c-section. I just told them, "it's real." and that was that. For so long I grieved the loss of my dream for my baby's first hour of life, but now it's ok. I guess because we've had so many hours together since then!

clara's mom- ah, Santa Barbara! Nice! I used to go roller skating on the beach there when I was younger. Oh, something fun to do with my daughter when she gets a little older!

noordinaryspider, I love reading about the choices you've made. I'm a "professional" (and have even served as president of my professional association) but now none of that seems real or relevant to me! I have also donated some of my costumes to thrift stores (not all, but a lot!) and wear what is comfortable and feels right. Even when I'm working.

As for the question about being an older mom, I sure hope I get to enjoy my daughter as an adult. I have a patient/client who is 82 and had her son at 40, and she inspires me! Another aspect is knowing I won't be able to have five or six kids!!! I am so happy to have made the realization, though, that just because I am 40 and single doesn't mean I can't think about another baby!


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## jrabbit (May 10, 2008)

ohno - all this self speculation has made me realize something ... if my dd's wait til they are 40 to have babies, i may never know them. now that makes me sad. i would never want to pressure them to have babies on my schedule, tho. so, i have to make some changes to my life to insure longevity!


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## ElliesMomma (Sep 21, 2006)

hi ladies, i think i introduced myself earlier but it's been awhile since i posted here. i'm 40, mom to an almost 3 year old, and about 6 weeks pg with #2. my husband is 58. he has adult children from his previous marriage and absolutely *no qualms* about starting over again. he does not feel old (well maybe his back gets a little sore from time to time, but he is fully engaged with playing with our daughter, teaching her to hit a baseball, all the things that a "younger" dad does). in fact, in many ways, he is a better dad now than he was when he was younger (he was much younger, like in his 20's).

as for me, i have no basis for comparison b/c i was previously married but childless. i do think it worked out well for me to have been married at 23, divorced at 30 without kids. many of my friends married for the first time around 30, and many of them got their own divorces some 5-7 years later, and are now raising children as single moms and/or continuing to battle their ex's in costly divorce court.

i count my blessings on that. as for worrying that something could happen to us, we have appointed my brother and his wife (they have three school age kids) to be our child/ren's guardians and feel confident they would be good parents to them if need be. hopefully it won't come to that.

i have some longevity in my family, one gma lived to 98 (although "lost it" around 90) and on the other side, gma lived to 86 and was mentally sharp till the end. barring an accident of some kind (which could happen to anyone of any age), i'm reasonably confident that i will live to see DD finish college, start her career, marry and have children. my husband may (or may not) have quite as long but in any case, i pray he will be around to see her through to adulthood.

i do believe that *everything happens for a reason* and while there are pros and cons to every situation, we have nothing to do but deal with the hand we've got.

there are so many joys to being a later in life mom. think of how flighty and superficial i was as a 20 something year old. how much angst i felt in my early 30s. (heck, even my late 30s). things are starting to settle down a bit now that i'm 40. i'm less compelled to waste time on things that don't matter. maybe it's part of the feeling that time is limited, that you start to limit the time you give to things that don't matter.

like, raising your children is something that really does matter. and we know it.

my mom had her four children from age 19, 20, 23 and 26. she waited a good long while to see me have a grandchild, and i'm sure she feared i never would. but alas she is about to become grandma to number 9 this year (my brothers all waited awhile too-- this year there will be 4 grandchildren born, god willing).

which is just to say that you never know, our children may not want to wait until they are 40 to have a child. you might wind up with a grandchild by the time you're 60.

40 year old grandmas are not exactly common where i live. i'm finding so many many 40 or close to 40 preggers or new moms. seriously everywhere i look.

i guess long story short: i feel pretty positive about it all.


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *noordinaryspider* 

there's a flamefest thread on my mainstream ddc where i was unanimously "voted off the island" and asked not to post any more. good riddance.









NOS No way was it unanimous! I would have NEVER voted you off! Not you!







I guess I must have missed something







:


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Jezzy* 







NOS No way was it unanimous! I would have NEVER voted you off! Not you!







I guess I must have missed something







:

no, no, no, no, no! mdc mamas have been WONDERFUL and I gave never felt unwelcome here.

I have, however, had several posts about my problems with mainstream boards pulled even though I am aware of the UA and thought that I had used oblique enough terms not to violate this:

Quote:

Do not post to invite MDC members to other boards for adversarial purposes or post inflammatory information about MDC discussions at other boards, or about communities and discussions elsewhere, regardless of whether or not you link to that discussion or community. This is to maintain and respect the integrity of our own and other communities.
so i'd rather not go into any more detail about the incident than i already have.

Mods, if that was too much would a simple "I sometimes have trouble making friends online" be a better way for me to phrase this?


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jrabbit* 
ohno - all this self speculation has made me realize something ... if my dd's wait til they are 40 to have babies, i may never know them. now that makes me sad. i would never want to pressure them to have babies on my schedule, tho. so, i have to make some changes to my life to insure longevity!









I keep telling dh that if we want to be able to keep up with dd (she's so fearless that I joke we'll need to be fit enough to be in her base camp when she attempts Mt. Everest) we'd better take really good care of ourselves. My family's pretty long-lived, so hopefully genetics are on my side (as well as lifestyle). Dh's not so much, but he's very well aware of the need to take really good care of himself, and is actively engaged in making a few lifestyle changes.

And yes, I wouldn't want my daughters to feel pressured, but hope that I'll be able to meet my grandkids someday.


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## jrabbit (May 10, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *claras_mom* 







I keep telling dh that if we want to be able to keep up with dd (she's so fearless that I joke we'll need to be fit enough to be in her base camp when she attempts Mt. Everest) we'd better take really good care of ourselves. My family's pretty long-lived, so hopefully genetics are on my side (as well as lifestyle). Dh's not so much, but he's very well aware of the need to take really good care of himself, and is actively engaged in making a few lifestyle changes..

I think I have rather good genes for health & longevity on my side - and DH is pretty healthy, too. I just need to be sure that the trend continues.







I feel like my life only recently started, so I hope I get to enjoy it forEVER! I'm a little concerned about heart disease and high blood pressure, which are things I need to keep an eye on. And arthritis. I just hope that homeopathy and healthy diet choices continue to work in my favor.

--janis
http://www.pigvig.net/bellygirls.jpg


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Ok Nos!!









OMG *jrabbit* that pic is AMAZING!!!

I got a very nice compliment yeaterday







Someone was saying how cute Ashlee was and I mentioned that I had 2 more at home. She asked how old. I said 16 (almost) and 13. She did a jaw drop and asked me if I started having children in grade school LOL!!! I took it as a huge compliment coming from a woman!


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

this isn't the right time of my life for it, but i do intend to put together a collection of letters for my dgc in case i don't live long enough to know them any other way.

i am so glad that i nagged my grandmother to do this for dd and ds1.

it never would have occured to me to ask my 29 year old sister to do the same. Two weeks after ds1 was born, she became suddenly and mysteriously ill and died. The autopsy says it was an autoimmune problem.

Sis was also a writer and since she lived off the grid and didn't care much for telephones, we were able to collect and share a fair amount of the letters she had written to her friends and family. She cussed like a sailor, had strong opinions, and never shied from controversial subjects, so I decided to wait until dd was 18 to share the "Auntie X notebook" with her.

It did not take the place of the relationship she should have had with her aunt, but I do feel that she knows who Sis was and maybe a bit more about herself, since she takes after her auntie in many ways.


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

I too save letters; as well as email.

I think that storytelling can keep things alive as well, in the intergenerational sense. I come from a family of storytellers, in that we remember and recount things that we've done or that have happened in the family. The trick is getting these things written down. My mom swears she's going to start doing it. With Dad, we'd need a slow afternoon and a voice-activated tape recorder...concealed, probably.







He's not one to dwell on the past. Then again, just this morning, he brought up a motorcycle trip I'd completely forgotten--one where we got caught in a thunderstorm and finally arrived at my grandmother's soaked to the skin and filthy from road dirt. It was...um...dangerous and not very fun. The one I remembered was almost getting caught in a storm at the very beginning of a week-long motorcycle road trip dad and I took a few years later. And that was a great trip.

Dh's family....not so much into stories. The first time I took him home for Christmas, Mom and I were deep into storytelling mode--with each other, really; not so much for his entertainment







--and dh got this funny look and said, "I wonder what stories my parents would tell about me?" And the thing is, as near as I can tell, they didn't--which makes me sad for him, a little. His mom died in '99 and his dad in '04 (before dd was born). And when FIL wrote his "life story" some years back it deliberately barely touched on his 3 kids and the everyday adventures they'd had as a family. (I'd like to think that if FIL had lived longer he might have grown on me, but I found him to be a fairly self-centered person in a way that detracted from any likable qualities. Given time, the likable bits might have become more apparent. OTOH, I think I'd have really liked MIL, but never got the chance to know her, as dh and I started dating early in 2000.) So, in addition to possibly not having a natural bent toward storytelling--he tries sometimes, which makes me happy, but can't convey (remember?) much detail--dh wasn't raised up in it, so to speak.

Dd loves the family stuff, and I love telling it, so hopefully the tradition can continue with her, and we--dh and I--can be real to our grandkids, even if we don't live long enough to have a long (or any) relationship with them.


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

I love to write, too. And have thought about putting letters together for my children to read one day. I just have not done it yet.

I think, for me, the hardest part of being an older mom is the lack of peer support I have IRL.

All the moms my age have older children, the ages of my oldest children, yet they can not remember life with littles around. And all the moms with littles can not relate to life with teens and adult children.

So, I usually end up on the sidelines, not "fitting in" with any group.


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

:







:Happy first birthday Ashlee







:







:


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## THANKFULFORFIVE (Jan 8, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jrabbit* 
ohno - all this self speculation has made me realize something ... if my dd's wait til they are 40 to have babies, i may never know them. now that makes me sad. i would never want to pressure them to have babies on my schedule, tho. so, i have to make some changes to my life to insure longevity!

I hadn't thought about this! I can't imagine NOT seeing my grandbabies from all my kids! Hopefully I'll get to enjoy GGC from the older ones, too.

Congrats Juneau! Our daughters share the same birthday! Mine just turned 14.

NOSpider----you intrigue me. I find your posts quite interesting and thought-provoking. I look forward to hearing more from you!


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Jezzy* 







:







:Happy first birthday Ashlee







:







:

Just had to add








:Happy Birthday Ashlee!







:


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kidzaplenty* 
I really do not feel old at all. But I was wondering, What is the hardest thing about being "older" and having babies?

Is it the lack of energy?
The lack of physical flexibility?
The idea of being "old enough to be a grandma"?
The worry of becoming incompacitated or dying before you children are old enough to remember you or take care of themselves?
Or is just knowing you are giving up your "ripe old age" to chase after children, a time when others are retiring, and you are adding more responsibility?


for me, its really not hard at all. i don't know..maybe i just had a midlife crisis or something and decided to become a SAHM but i have been so much happier since i made that decision. i have as much energy as i did in my 20's and as my physical flexibility (if i could get rid of the extra lbs. from this last pregnancy but with tandem nursing the weight doesnt come off of me quickly).
i dont worry about dying bc we.......that could happen anytime to anyone.

i dont feel like we are giving up our ripe old age b/c well...what else would we do? if i want to travel, i can. i guess i always have the attitude that i will do what i want to do..and if im doing it, i guess thats what i want to do. lol!

i was an attorney in a past life...i do miss it every now and again. i don't know...i don't think ill ever go back to law. but i dont know. for now im enjoying hte 2 younger kids and my 10 yo....my 18 yo is about to begin college and is self sufficient at this point (other than college tuition) and im very very proud of him (cant believe im saying that...we had a few very very hard years).

anyway, compared to when i was 22 (first born) i feel like im a MUCH BETTER mom. i have more patience, more understanding, more wisdom, more research under my belt, more confidence.

i have lots of friends that are not the same age as myself. i find parenting styles to be much much more impt. than someone of the same age. im sure i would find it hard to find many 40 something crunchy moms..there are a few that i know and love but mostly, if someone fits in with my general philosophy of parenting, im grateful. i feel we all learn from each other. and i guess they keep me younger too! my best friend isnt even 30 yet. lol


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## juneau (May 20, 2005)

Hi *Thankful for Five*, I'm in Ohio, too, missing living in Chicago. Snow is falling here, again!







:

Happy birthday, *Ashlee* (and *Terran Sage*, too)! I can't believe it's been a whole year. And now I have a little wonder too -- isn't life amazing!?

I can't believe how much I had been holding my breath for my entire pregnancy. It was as uneventful as could be but given my age and my history, I was waiting the whole time for the other shoe to drop. I just can't believe Eliza Jane is here and perfect and healthy. Now I can breathe again and do things like figure out what she's going to wear and where her stuff is going to go (I just didn't allow myself to get invested in that until she was born).

I was planning our first outing for tomorrow -- a visit to a breastfeeding support group and then taking my mom out to lunch for her birthday. But we're due for up to 14 inches of snow -- on top of the foot or so of snow and ice we already had -- so I think I'll remain trapped inside for yet another day.







:


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Hi juneau - You are such an inspiration to me







: even though it's not IRL it's still so motivating to hear your story. I say this as dh and I will begin trying again for the third time in a year. It's so hard to not be worried, and like you said you're always waiting for the other shoe to drop. I'm sure I'll be the same way. I wish you the best of luck







and hope the extreme temps pass soon. I can't even imagine what it would be like to have so much snow and ice. I've never even seen it actually snow in my life before







living in AZ it's about in the 70's right now.

-Kate-


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## juneau (May 20, 2005)

Hi *lovebeingamommy*, I'm glad my story is an inspiration to you. Good luck TTC! 70s weather -- I've almost forgotten what that feels like... We did get about a foot of snow and the temp will be in the teens when we wake up in the morning.







:







:







:


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## jrabbit (May 10, 2008)

is facebook a mid-life crisis? with this forced bed-rest Hell, I finally caved in and signed up for it. my, my, it's addictive!

I am getting quite adept at on-handed typing ...

now, if I could only figure out how to knit one-handed. or, at least, convince Zoe that it isn't the end of the world to 'not' nurse for an hour ...

--jnis


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

*jrabbit*, I'm glad you said that about Facebook! Because every once in awhile, I think about signing up for it. I'd probably get hooked way quick...

It actually sometimes comes up in faculty meetings...students are using facebook to publicize events and do all kinds of networking and sometimes my colleagues suggest that we should all get on the bandwagon. Keeping up with the times, I suppose.


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

I sighned up not too long ago, but only because I was bored that day and wanted to snag my user ID at any place I could get it.







I have never done anything there though.


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## jrabbit (May 10, 2008)

turns out that it's a lot of fun!!! I think it's less addictive than MDC, though.









--janis
"Janis Abel Hyde" if you wanna be friends


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Not much here, just don't want the thread to die completely.









Dh and I are slowly getting our house ready to sell. Crazy time to be entering the market--not just the economy, but with the baby coming--but on the other hand, we could use a bigger place. Our realtor has told us that houses are selling, if priced right; and we do have a lot of equity.

That said....man! it's a lot of work, and only happens on the weekends.


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

re: facebook, I think it's way fun! It was a total time drain for me at first, but the novely did wear off a tiny bit! It's fun to look at pics and post my pics. I also just launched a new online business, and some of my old friends on facebook are ordering from me, so I like that! I did just join a group of alumni from my elementary school, which is a little crazy. (although a huge group of us went from K-12 together, so not much different from a high school alumni group in a way.)

Jezzy, that is a nice compliment!


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

i'm on facebook too (PM me for my irl name) but having a bit of a problem with the addictive qualities of it since I'm reconnecting with friends from my old school (Miquon Upper, but it's called "Crefeld" now) who i haven't talked to in almost 30 years.

between that and trying to eradicate infectious parasites, i guess i've been pretty busy and quiet lately but Terran is a dear, the 19 year old is "getting it" about who i am and why her childhood was the way it was, and i'm learning to let go of some of the guilt i feel about my 17 year old a little at a time.

he's gone now, but i'm holding on to the thought that he knows i love him and someday he may decide to come home again.

my 21 year old, who i did not raise, was quite touched when i introduced her to my childhood friends as "my daughter" instead of trying to pretend that the whole sad story of the custody battle never happened, and we are definitely talking about getting her out for a visit in the not too distant future.

But not until I'm SURE the bugs are gone, of course.


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jrabbit* 
is facebook a mid-life crisis? with this forced bed-rest Hell, I finally caved in and signed up for it. my, my, it's addictive!

--jnis

im on there. i like it b/c i can add things from my mobile phone. i dont do alot of games or anything so when im sitting waiting for something (like gas yesterday..i swear i was at the slowest gas pump EVER), i can update what im doing and take pix and upload them. i know...reallly really lame! lol!

Quote:


Originally Posted by *claras_mom* 









Not much here, just don't want the thread to die completely.









Dh and I are slowly getting our house ready to sell. Crazy time to be entering the market--not just the economy, but with the baby coming--but on the other hand, we could use a bigger place. Our realtor has told us that houses are selling, if priced right; and we do have a lot of equity.

That said....man! it's a lot of work, and only happens on the weekends.

good luck on selling. we have a house that is just sitting right now b/c im scared to put it on the market.

i keep meaning to come back to this thread.

yesterday i took ds3 (3) to his art class..it was our first time there. i was sooo organized..took ds3 out (who of course wanted to be carried) and then ds4 is in a bucket (i take it inside in the cold weather and then pop him in the sling when i get inside...when it warms up we wont use it anymore)...anyway, im carrying ds3 and the bucket with baby...walk the 500 ft or so to the door and its LOCKED. i just wanted to cry!!!!!! we were early and i was still LATE b/c the art class was in another building.

i couldnt help ask myself why a (used to be professional) 40 year old woman was walking around carrying 2 young kids to the wrong place??? i used to be sooo together! lol!

Quote:


Originally Posted by *hrsmom* 
re: facebook, I think it's way fun! It was a total time drain for me at first, but the novely did wear off a tiny bit! It's fun to look at pics and post my pics. I also just launched a new online business, and some of my old friends on facebook are ordering from me, so I like that! I did just join a group of alumni from my elementary school, which is a little crazy. (although a huge group of us went from K-12 together, so not much different from a high school alumni group in a way.)

Jezzy, that is a nice compliment!









what is your online business? i would love to get a peek!

i have recently joined the "no spend" challenge and am having fun doing that. a total life change for us but im having fun figuring out how i can SAVE money by not spendinng anything but how we can still have fun.


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## smibbo (Jan 14, 2009)

hi! i'm 42. I have 4 kids.

three boys: 18, 16, 13.

I had my tubes tied with my third boy. Then when he was nearly 3 I got divorced. About four years later I got remarried. I got a tubal ligation reversal. We conceived within four months of that and now I have an awesome little girl (18mos)

So I'm experienced AND new.


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Hi Smibbo Welcome


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *PassionateWriter* 
good luck on selling. we have a house that is just sitting right now b/c im scared to put it on the market.

We had an interesting conversation with a realtor at an open house recently. It was a nice house--it had gone on the market during the week before and already had an offer. And I've seen a couple like that--that go from just on the market to "pending" very quickly (in the MLS listings). Her take on it was that many buyers are looking for solid value--in other words competitively priced houses without a lot of work to be done. And that those houses are selling.

We'll probably go the pre-approval route, when it comes to it, so that there are no nasty surprises in the escrow process.

In the meantime, my mantra is that anything we do to the house to get it ready to sell--finally changing out the kitchen hardware, making small repairs, touching up paint, etc.--makes it nicer for us to live in.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

smibbo

I've updated you to our front page









Hope you enjoy the thread.


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## Pookietooth (Jul 1, 2002)

I am over 40, and I have a five year old (who will be six soon). I'm also TTC, and hoping for #2. Can I join? I'm on Facebook, too, PM me if you want to add me.


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

PassionateWriter, thanks for asking. My new business is www.thesoxclub.com it's in my siggy now. I'd love to have you take a look!! I'm working on making it a little prettier (and even getting a logo, what a concept!) but I am pleased with how it is going so far (my computer is doing weird things so some of my punctuation is off!)

nice to meet you, smibbo and Pookietooth! Smibbo, congratulations on your little one, and Pookietooth, all the best with TTC!!! 

I'd love to add you guys on facebook. I'll pm you. I get a kick out of it! I think it's neat when two of my friends who don't know each other have almost the same status update.

It just finished hailing here, that's unusual but exciting! When they are tiny, of course! I'm not even sure if I spelled that right, but I think it's hail and not hale. Hmmm......... I used to be so smart!!!









ETA: PassionateWriter, re: facebook, I don't do all the games, either. Or the requests. I have 103 misc. requests and 1 event invitation! I just do friend requests!







But I do have fun with it!


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

i woudl love to add you guys to FB....pls. pm me your addy.

i dont pay for a pm box here though so i have restricted pm's. i guess i should just delete all the ones that are in my box now. lol!


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## ktmama (Jan 21, 2004)

Can I join? I'm Kate, 43 with two dds (3.5 and 11.5) and one baby on the way. I'll be 44 when s/he is born in June.

I'm on FB too, mostly because I have a HUGE family and my nieces and nephews weren't accessing our family website (myfamily.com), but will communicate on FB. Even my mom uses FB now. Also, I've managed to re-establish some high school connections and that is fun. My whole Aug 05 MDC DDC also moved over to FB and we have a group there.


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Welcome Kate!!


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

Hi, Katie! Congratulations!!!!

Hi to my three new face book buddies, too. One thing about facebook, is it tells you when it's someone's birthday, so noordinaryspider,














:


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

Thanks, Kimberly.







:

I'm glad to have you as a facebook buddy.

KD set up a MyFamily and i love it. Terran's too young to understand, of course, but it's nice having contact with the other moms and sharing pictures of the babies. I'm excited about the kids growing up "together", even if it's just online, and having a strong sense of extended family.


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Happy Birthday NOS!!!







:


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## salt_phoenix (May 10, 2007)

OHHHH! I so missed it! HAPPY BIRTHDAY HEATHER!!!







:

Yes, I still stalk this thread.









I meet all the requirements.







And Facebook makes me







: I didn't really WANT the people I went to h.s. with to find me. I didn't like them THEN, what makes me think I will like them NOW?








Besides, everybody got old but me.


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## jrabbit (May 10, 2008)

yaknow, as the days go by, i really am enjoying facebook more. i wasn't popular in high school, so it hasn't been a problem - "they" haven't "found" me because "they" aren't looking for me!!!! I am amused by how people have changed, though. Some people don't look any different after 20 years, and some are unrecognizable.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

*Jen* and *Kate*

I added you both to the front page. Hope you enjoy the good conversations here.







:


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

WWYD? So we're all 40+, or really close to it, and I know many of us are TTC #2,3 or more or are pregnant right now. We're mid-life, probably have our careers in full swing or are situated confortably with our lives by now. I guess what I'm trying to say is we're more settled, hopefully, than we were in our 20's.









But considering how BAD the economy is RIGHT NOW, does this factor into your decision to TTC again soon? I just turned 44 and am ready to TTC in March, however, now my job is on the line (I'm in education) it's really scary. If I lose the job I have no benefits and I've been in education for so long it's all I have credentails for. I feel like I'm walking a tightrope and having to now do what I did when I started teaching - like networking, resume-updating, interviews, etc. It's so time-comsuming especially when you have a LO.







:

I'm trying to remain positive, but it's hard. Just curious are any of you mamas in a similar situation with the possibility of job loss or cuts and thinking about TTC again? Is it affecting your decision?


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

I hate to say that it's affecting my decision but today it is.. I just turned 44 yesterday and still don't have PPAF back yet, so this is all academic, but I'm less concerned about how I could support another child than I am about all the hostility I see directed towards single mothers and low income people.

That doesn't apply to you and dh, though. Both of my parents were depression babies and neither of them were planned. Both of them were miracles who were thoroughly loved by their families. I am so glad i had Terran before it was too late, economy or no economy. There are many material things I was able to give my older kids that I can't or don't give him, and I've been surprised at how much more pleasant and easy infancy has been with my new, simpler life.


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## Pookietooth (Jul 1, 2002)

Happy birthday, noordinaryspider! I know what you mean about hostility directed towards single moms - yikes! What's up with that? Yeah, and as if low income people are to blame for everything. I prefer to deal with individual, not categories of people.
I like Facebook because I can see what people are doing and play games too. As far as TTC, I have been a SAHM since ds was born in 2003. I'm currently WAHMing, but only very part time. I don't worry too much about the economy -- we were already pretty broke what with my dh not being interested in making a lot of money and me quitting my well-paying job to stay home. We live in an apartment, our car is paid for, and we never go on vacations. No biggie.


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## athansor (Feb 9, 2005)

Hi all!
Sorry I don't post much, but I do enjoy reading everyone's posts. I got on facebook recently, and it's been fun because we have a sort of virtual high school reunion going on. Next year is my 25th HS reunion, although I don't know if they will actually have a reunion or wait until 30. But, it's been nice to re-connect with lots of HS friends.
As far as another child goes, it's hard to say if the economy has any affect on our decision. With one who is only 9 months old, and a 4 year old, I feel like my hands are pretty full. I don't think I would start ttc again for at least 2 years, if at all.


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

I wish I could be a SAHM, but I'm recovering from some psychological/verbal abuse about that and I kind of need my jobs for my own sense of self worth right now. Since I take Terran with me, I think it's good for him in a Continuum Concept-ish way but yea, I echo your lack of concern for the most part.

My grandfather, during the last depression, said that you can always tell a well educated person because they are never bored even when they don't have any money. That was what I tried to give my big kids when I was homeschooling and what I am still trying to give the kids who still live with me.

I, too, drive a car that is paid for, pay off my credit card balance every month, and don't have a mortgage or student loan debt. Reconnecting with my high school buds, many of whom have high-paying jobs and high-pressure debts, makes me realize how truly lucky I am.

I was kind of wondering why you, Pookietooth, didn't want to be my facebook friend until i realized that I mostly know you from stalking the TTC thread and you don't have a clue who I am!

/dork


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

well, now i want to join the FB fun from this tribe but dont know who else is on there. i just cleared out my inbox.









as far as economy, we are certainly tightening our belts just b/c we dont know where things will end up and its best to be prepared. i joined the "no spend" thread this month and i actually enjoy writing down every penny that i spend b/c i havent done that in a long time.

i have been SAHM for almost 4 years now. i HAD a professional job at one point but after this long i doubt i could just go back.


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

I'm not thinking about TTC at the moment, my "plan" is to possibly TTC in about 2 years. As for the economy, I haven't made any money for about 5 years!! Things are about the same for me right now. I have my part time audiology practice, and I'm starting up the socks thing, and just learning that things that represent money are just numbers and not who I am. Same goes for being a single mom- it's just a label! I confess that I had been wanting to get married, and I realized it was because I wanted to be more socially acceptable! Seriously! But as of the last couple of months, I'm learning that it's pointless to wish for someting other than what is! And I'm really enjoying Hannah and my life now.

On facebook I am friends with some people who I played basketball with in H.S. but didn't socialize with, and every so often old pictures get posted and I realize that I really wasn't part of that crowd. It's fun to look at the old pics. Most of my actual high school friends don't seem to be on facebook. They probably are but I haven't found them yet.

passionatewriter, we added each other, right? I'm Kimberly. I'll have to check.


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Ohhh, I may have to give in on the facebook thing!







We'll see. My pattern is to be slow to take on a new technology and then get completely obsessed with it...

Had a fabulous Valentine's Day--one for the record books.

- Started with a trip to the farmer's market for flowers. I do altar flowers for my church about every 5 weeks. This time, they were given in honor of a couple celebrating 62 years of marriage--their kids had given extra money, so I splashed out on orchids, gerbera daisies, and roses. Dd helped choose the flowers and with the arranging--a process not without its stress, but it all worked out.








- Meanwhile, back at the house, the laundry fairy was busy making clean, dryer-warm clothes appear in closets and drawers. And he mowed the lawn and stained a bunch of interior replacement doors, just for good measure. We might even be able to call the door installer soon.
- Dd finally figured out that she really can poop on the potty, not just in a pull-up.







: This is a seriously Big Deal. If your kids potty-trained before their third (or fourth) birthday, you can only guess how frustrating it is to have a kid who knows her body's cues perfectly, but just isn't ready to make it all work. She was proud, I was proud, dh was proud.....she even said, without prompting, that she figured she could do it every time.
- And then we left dd with a sitter, and went out for a romantic meal. The restaurant had clearly lost the reservation, but honored it anyway....


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

Sounds like a great day, claras mom! Wow, 62 years! My grandparents just celebrated 60 this past year. As for facebook, in my personal experience, it is quite something to obsess about at first! And then the novelty wears off somewhat. I still check it every day, but it doesn't have to be first thing in the morning anymore!


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## Miracle And Wonder (Feb 13, 2009)

I'd like to join, if that's all right? I'm candida, 45. I had a miscarriage in February of 1983 (at 19) and I have two living babies, Isobel (who will be one at the end of the month) and Ianto (who was born 21 December). Ianto also had a twin, annalisa, who passed away at the beginning of this month.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Miracle And Wonder* 
I'd like to join, if that's all right? I'm candida, 45. I had a miscarriage in February of 1983 (at 19) and I have two living babies, Isobel (who will be one at the end of the month) and Ianto (who was born 21 December). Ianto also had a twin, annalisa, who passed away at the beginning of this month.









I am so sorry about your babe that passed







Annalisa









Welcome to MDC and to our tribe. You'll fit right in and we're so glad to have you here, Candida.


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Welcome candida! I am sorry about your baby


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## ktmama (Jan 21, 2004)

Oh, me too, Candida. I'm so sorry to hear about your baby. Welcome to MDC and to our little tribe.


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## contactmaya (Feb 21, 2006)

Hi, i might as well join. I just turned 42 (i cant believe it actually) I have a 10 month old and a 3 1/2 year old. Both boys.







:
Maya


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## juneau (May 20, 2005)

Welcome Maya and Candida. Candida, I'm so very sorry for the loss of your precious daughter. What a beautiful name.







Annalisa


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *contactmaya* 
Hi, i might as well join. I just turned 42 (i cant believe it actually) I have a 10 month old and a 3 1/2 year old. Both boys.







:
Maya









Maya So glad you're here!! I think you'll enjoy our group of mamas. Sending you over a friend request tonight.


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

still plugging away. i just realized today (yes, im slow in my old age) that i will be 41 in 2 months. wow! time flies when you are having fun!

Zen is 4 months today! crazy time! slow down! lol!


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## jrabbit (May 10, 2008)

Well, today is hard. It's my DD2 birthday - she was born at home 5 years ago. All I can think about today is how I was robbed, just a few weeks ago. It's even painful to look at Zoe today, even though looking at her is what got me through those first days. She'll be 6 weeks tomorrow, and I admit that I'm in denial right now about what happened. I haven't looked at my blog in a couple weeks - or done any writing. I can't hear a birth story or talk to a pregnant woman without crying. I think I need a couple more weeks of denial, though. I certainly don't want to think about it 'today.'

Molly's birth: http://www.pigvig.net/birth.html
Zoe's birth: http://lostmother.blogspot.com/

thanks for this forum.
--janis


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## Pookietooth (Jul 1, 2002)

jrabbit. I am sorry your birth did not go as you planned and that you are hurting.


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

Jrabbit,







. Hope you are feeling much better soon.


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Ohhhh Janis I am sorry that you are hurting mama


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## ktmama (Jan 21, 2004)

Janis, I don't really know what to say, except I imagine if I were in the same circumstance, I would feel the exact same way as you. To say "at least you have a healthy baby" (wow, you even wrote this on your blog before your c/s) is to completely dismiss your birth experience. I'm so sorry for the loss of your dream. I'm helping a friend try to process her 28 week emergency c-section and it happened last June. I'm thinking of you. Kate.


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## DaughterOfKali (Jul 15, 2007)

Hope it's ok to drop back in here. I forgot about this thread.


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## Miracle And Wonder (Feb 13, 2009)

Janis, I'm so sorry about your negative birth experience. Although my experience was somewhat different, I have felt cheated and angry about my oldest's birth and can empathise with feeling that way even weeks later. Isobel is coming up on a year and I still can't think about her birth.







mama.

Speaking of Isobel's birthday, it's coming up next Friday and I haven't the faintest idea of what to do. I'm thinking cake and presents. My parents are coming so they might plan something. Blah. I just want to sleep. Poor Isobel.


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

Oh, Janis!







:


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## DaughterOfKali (Jul 15, 2007)

Janis- I was traumatized by a terrible birth (c-section), too. My son is now 6 and I still mourn the fact that I never got to deliver vaginally/naturally.
He's my first and my only so I will never get to know what a natural birth feels like.
I feel for you, mama.


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## Pookietooth (Jul 1, 2002)

I think first birthdays are not really a big deal -- they are more for the older family members' sake anyway (parents, older siblings, grandparents if around). We didn't do much for ds's first birthday. I was cheap and bought him a discounted Valentine's cake (his bday is the day after Valentine's Day). What's really bad is that this year I totally blew it and didn't get it together to have a party for his sixth birthday. He was quite mad. I am belatedly having one for him next month, to give people time to RSVP.


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

s janis


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

Hi Candida and Maya!

Candida, I'm sorry, too, about your loss. I think it's OK if you don't make a big deal out of the first birthday. When Isobel is older you can do things for her birthdays!

athansor, Hi! I just noticed your screen name and recognize you from our book discussion!










Janis, I hope you're feeling better. Hugs and hugs! I would consider myself healed from having had a c-section, but every so often I do wonder what it would be like to hold a baby o mine right after giving birth. Maybe next time. The grief is real and I think you're wise to process your grief as opposed to denying it.

I just realized that one year ago I was having my first baby shower!







: Wow, I had no idea what the next couple of months would bring! A year ago I was an excited pregnant mama washing new baby clothes, with no idea of what it would really mean to have a baby in the house! With only me to provide and care for her, too. Wow. The best life-changing experience I've ever had!


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Welcome Candida and Maya!

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Pookietooth* 
I think first birthdays are not really a big deal -- they are more for the older family members' sake anyway (parents, older siblings, grandparents if around).

I'd say the same even up to 3 or 4. We had family-only birthdays for 1-3 (didn't even really "do" a first, as we were en route to my mom's for the holidays); then invited family and just dd's best friend for her 4th. And it worked well. Took her yesterday to the opposite kind of party for a couple of friends turning 3. It wasn't over-the-top by any means, but there were just a ton of people there, kids and adults, and both birthday girls as well as a good number of the young guests seemed overwhelmed by the whole thing.


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

my kids are so sick. the 3 yo doesnt worry me so much but the 4 month old! jeez! this is the 2nd time he's had a cold..adn this is a bit more than a cold...he's gone from 99, to 101 to 103 and back and forth for 2 days now.

i have rocked wayyyyyy more in teh last 2 days than i have in the last few years! im just hoping they all get better soon. DP has been out of work for 4 days now.


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## jrabbit (May 10, 2008)

We start official birthday parties at age 5. I'm a real scrooge, but besides that, i think that a 'party' should be appreciated by the child, and that doesn't really happen at such a young age. Molly turned 5 last week, and we celebrated with 3 other little girls and their parents (and Nana/Pops) on Saturday. 2 other guests called sick, and it turned out I was glad - there wasn't room! We had a playdo party with a cake. I made koolaid playdo and the kids played with it for 2 hours. That's all. Today, I'm going to bake some of their creations - hope that works.









My oldest DD loves planning parties, so we make a really big deal out of it - she gets to pick a theme, and we create everything around that theme: she makes an invitation (REAL invitation, in the mail); we make decorations, piñata, cake, food, party favors (sometimes). We try really hard not to buy decorations or anything that is 'throwaway'. I also forbid character theme parties - her last party was a "Dance Contest" (age 9), inspired by the movie Grease. It was super silly, and the dance contest didn't work as planned, but it was fun. http://philhyde.smugmug.com/gallery/...31904353_2HLTk

One idea I'd like to implement is a cloth table cloth that guests sign. I think we'll get one before our next party (we plan to have a June water slide party, which Annie likes to call her 'half birthday party').

--janis


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

I agree that really young kids can't appreciate a big party. That said, I was led to do a little more this year because dd had expressed a really clear preference for how her birthday would be celebrated--and this quite a few months in advance. She wanted a cake with balloons on it, and to be at home (because her birthday is so close to Christmas, we are on the road about every other year; last year we celebrated with relatives out-of-state). Simple enough.







I'll just play it by ear as she grows. In my family, most birthdays were family affairs--grandparents optional; I don't remember very many where we invited other kids.


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

We do our birthday parties for every birthday starting at one. We generally only do family birthdays, but then again, with such a large family, it is like a party.









I do a cake and gifts, and most of the time decorations. We like to make each birthday person feel special, it is THEIR day of the year for THEIR preferences, likes and such.

They get to choose the family activity, they get to hand pick the meal, they get to pick the kind of cake if they want (although half the time they just trust me on it), and they don't have to do any chores or work. It makes it a special holiday for them.

The reason we start at one, is because it is a tradition. And the other children really enjoy making it special for the youngest ones. Not to mention, it is a great way to celebrate milestones in a child's life. I take tons of pictures and then I have a yearly record of growth for everyone. And since I have birthday all spread out over the year, I have a constant growth record. It is really cool to go back and see how much they have grown over the year.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *PassionateWriter* 
my kids are so sick. the 3 yo doesnt worry me so much but the 4 month old! jeez! this is the 2nd time he's had a cold..adn this is a bit more than a cold...he's gone from 99, to 101 to 103 and back and forth for 2 days now.

i have rocked wayyyyyy more in teh last 2 days than i have in the last few years! im just hoping they all get better soon. DP has been out of work for 4 days now.

















Hope your LO's are feeling better soon







My DS has been sick with a cough for about the last two weeks. I have been also and it's miserable.

I'm sorry to hear about your DP. I may also be out of a job in a few months -education cuts







: I'm so absolutely disgusted because I remember people telling me in college to be a teacher you can go anywhere and your job is recession proof. yeah right!!


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

lovbeingamommy,
thanks. sorry for not being clear..DP was out of work due to illness (same thing ds3 and ds4 have). im the only one who has been healthy and taking care of everyone. i am sooo wiped!


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *PassionateWriter* 
lovbeingamommy,
thanks. sorry for not being clear..DP was out of work due to illness (same thing ds3 and ds4 have). im the only one who has been healthy and taking care of everyone. i am sooo wiped!

At least you're staying healthy. It's a lot taking care of your family when they're sick so I can imagine how tired out you must feel









Glad to hear it's not the job


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)




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## Verygoddess (Jun 18, 2006)

We have just done the round of ear infections and then the puking flu for the 2yo. Thank god the older kids didn't get that. Weeks like these make me wonder how Im going to cope with a toddler and a newborn and how you moms of many more than me do it!
So now Im 30 weeks pregnant and feel older and more tired than I remember from the last pregnancies.

Jennifer


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

We've been lucky this year--no puking flu and dd was only really sick once, the week before Christmas. I've got a month to go before #2 arrives. I have a little trepidation, but am slowly lining up my support system for the first weeks. My mom will be here for two weeks; a good friend (who dd loves) has offered to come hang out anytime I need her, i.e. on the days when dd isn't in daycare and I need an extra pair of hands; our neighbors have also offered to watch dd when we just need her occupied. Their oldest is dd's best friend; their youngest is about 15 months; so they've been through the transition and know just how to help!









So I'm trying not to freak out too badly. My main problem right now is just feeling completely apathetic with anything having to do with work. I'm literally counting down the days until I can be out of here, and have a little time to myself during the week (I teach; finals and spring break are approaching).


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## SuzymomofLaura (Mar 4, 2006)

Wow, I have some reading to do! What a large thread this is! Glad to have found you all!
My name is Suzy, I'm 42, and mother of two: my sweet Laura, now 4,5 yrs old already, and Lucie, our 20 month old (and not yet STTN at all), gluten/lactose intolerant VBAC miracle.
And there's DH, aged 50, plus one cat, 11 months old, in our household.
We BF, co-sleep and I recently summoned up the courage to pull out my CD stash again (it's been a crazy year for us).
I'd love to join you!







:


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Welcome *SuzymomofLaura*


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

SuzymomofLaura, Welcome to the group!


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## Pookietooth (Jul 1, 2002)

Luckiy for us, knock on wood, ds almost never gets sick -- he probably gets like two colds a year, and has only had the stomach flu once in his life. I think it's because he's older, and we have a pretty clean diet, although lately he's been eating some junk. Generally, we don't eat processed foods or sugar, but he ate cookies today. Sigh. And he got a bloody nose (which he gets often, but mostly if he eats a lot of dried fruit).

I wish I could just relax and enjoy the pregnancy, but given that I had a loss last time, I'm waiting anxiously for my next u/s at 8 weeks. Haven't even tried to find a midwife, afraid I'll jinx it. But maybe not getting one will jinx it?


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## jrabbit (May 10, 2008)

we've had a healthy winter, in spite of there being sicknesses passed around among everyone we know. crazy! but with a newborn in the house, i was a little more conservative with who my kids saw, so we have had very little exposure to others.

dh is having a bad allergy week, with spring in the air and us digging in our dusty garage all weekend. trying to clear out clutter and having a garage sale next weekend - may i say i HATE garage sales? i ran them for charity for 6 years, and i swore i'd never have one again. but we could sure use the cash, and DD9yo has been begging to have one - she sees them on the show Clean House ... sigh

i'm dabbling with EC this week, too - DD5yo was potty trrained at 16 months, and i really loved it compared with big sis who was in dipes til 4yo.

best wishes to Jen & Suzy!
--janis


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

its amazing. we are generally the healthiest ppl around but this flu put everyone on their arses! lol! and it just kept going around and around and around.







we dont eat processed food and try to eat mostly organic..lots of fruits and veggies and my kids have never had antibiotics or vaxed...but THIS bug hit everyone hard (except me..i got major coughs and sniffles but i didnt get the whole "in bed" thing that dh and ds3 did).

w/ ds3, who is 3, we were exposed alot this year. i just could not keep us in the house. i feared for ds4's life! lol!

we are all better now though and hopefully stronger for the kick we got.

i just cant wait for spring!!!


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

SuzymomofLaura.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Since it's been mentioned and I know that the other TTC over 40 group regularly starts a new thread ---Do you think we should too????

I don't mind moving the front page over to a new thread so we remember who the members are...whatuya all think









just PM, public message, or post and I'll keep track for a week or so.


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

I think a new thread would be good. Not for me, but new people sometimes feel intimidated with a long running thread and established members. Not to mention the load time and read times for longer threads.

Unless they just boom, I think long running threads should stay under about 100 post, and when they get there, a new one made.







But that's just me. And I am opinionated.


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

Hi everyone! I am thankful for no sickness here. I am super tired, but at least not sick! I think Hannah maybe working on tooth #7. Or do they stop at six?? Just kidding! It seems like six is enough for right now, though. I went to the chiro yesterday, but it didn't happen. For some reason my babe went a little nuts there. So much for the theory that kids are afraid of doctors because of shots. Hannah hasn't seen a doc (as a patient, that is) since she was a week old, and no shots. But she did not care for my chiro! I bribed my mom with the promise of lunch to go with me tomorrow! I am desperate for an adjustment!

A new thread would be cool!

Welcom Suzymomof Laura


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

Yea, I sometimes wionder if I would be more inclined to post to a fresh thread. My DDC starts a new thread every month and I've noticed that a lot of "lurkers" and folks who don't have a lot of computer time usually show up on the first day or two of a new thread.

ds1 has been bringing hiome some nasty bugs from school. I wouldn't mind so much if I was the only one effected, but what happens is that I hug him and he makes me sick but before I realize it, I've already hugged the other kids and made them sick.

Peh. dd can put together a VERY convincing argument on why I should just stop touching him altogether, but let's face it, 17 year old boys aren't very verbal with their mothers even under the best of circumstances and ds1's and my relationship could hardly be considered the best of circumstances.

So if I can't touch him, I don't think I can communicate with him.

So my 13 month old had the 24 hour stomach flu for almost a week and it's all my fault.


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Sorry for all the sick babies. Ashlee has been fighting a cold for a couple weeks now. Snotty nose, cough and a slight fever. She is in a pretty bad mood too.

We have been having sleep problems. Well she has never slept well it is just getting worse. She can't fall back to sleep without my nipple in her mouth







and she has been waking up A LOT like 8-10 times a night or more. I loose count.

She has also dropped a nap and will only nap once at around 2pm. If I don't lay down with her it is only for 1/2 an hour then she is up till 10 pm at the earliest. If I do take a nap with her she will sleep for 2 hours so I know she needs the sleep right?

Just seems like she should be sleeping more. I know that I could use some more







:

Did anyone else have one this little (13 months) down to only 1 nap already?


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovbeingamommy* 
Since it's been mentioned and I know that the other TTC over 40 group regularly starts a new thread ---Do you think we should too????

I don't mind moving the front page over to a new thread so we remember who the members are...whatuya all think









just PM, public message, or post and I'll keep track for a week or so.

I can go either way on a new thread. Finding a title for a new one could be fun--since this one is both "new" and "updated"


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## jrabbit (May 10, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Jezzy* 
Just seems like she should be sleeping more. I know that I could use some more







:

Did anyone else have one this little (13 months) down to only 1 nap already?

both of my dd's were one-a-day nappers starting before one year old. I don't know what makes that happen. However, dd1 napped til she was 4yo, and dd2 stopped napping about 2yo.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *claras_mom* 
I can go either way on a new thread. Finding a title for a new one could be fun--since this one is both "new" and "updated"
















Ohkedoke - what's your suggestions for titles everyone?























This is good, protective bacteria for all of us and our families. Seems like there's been a lot of sickness lately.







Geez, I haven't been sick for ten years and have had a horrible cough for about two weeks along with DS. It finally subsided on its own. My DH wasn't so lucky and needed abx - El Z Packo!! I think it's pretty powerful.


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

How 'bout the _Brand New and More Updated_ at 40 with little ones tribe.


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kidzaplenty* 
How 'bout the _Brand New and More Updated_ at 40 with little ones tribe.









That leaves room for the _Brand New Improved and Even More Updated_ at 40 with little ones tribe later; I like it!

Oh, and Lovebeingamommy, we've had some birthdays: ds1 is 17, dd2 will be 20 on the 21st, and I don't know what to do about 21 year old dd1; she is part of my life now but I didn't raise her and I don't want to mislead anyone or lie about that.


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## jrabbit (May 10, 2008)

my kids are now 9yo, 5yo & omg almost 2 months!


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

And guess whose birthday I forgot?

Yep, I'm 44 now.

Next year I get to be one of you uber-cool at and over 4*5* with little ones mamas.








:







:







:


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## Pookietooth (Jul 1, 2002)

Ds had a birthday last month -- he's six now! Wow! As far as a new thread, it might be nice - we could just name it after the season (is it spring yet?). Like "New: at & over 40 with little ones tribe hoping for spring" or something.


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

Perhaps a shorter title would be good. Something like:

40+ with Littles Tribe.

40 plus with Little Ones Spring Thead

40+ with Young-un's

Or something like that.


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kidzaplenty* 
Perhaps a shorter title would be good. Something like:

40+ with Littles Tribe.

40 plus with Little Ones Spring Thead

40+ with Young-un's

Or something like that.









I'm liking "40+ with Littles Tribe...Spring 09"


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *noordinaryspider* 
And guess whose birthday I forgot?

Yep, I'm 44 now.

Next year I get to be one of you uber-cool at and over 4*5* with little ones mamas.








:







:







:











So that means that in July, when I turn 45, I _finally_ get to be cool!

Having always been one of the geeky outsiders, its probably good I've a few months to wrap my brain around it.


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## mamazee (Jan 5, 2003)

A new thread would be good because I do have trouble keeping track of such long threads.

Anyway, I posted on here before when I was 40 and pregnant. Now I'm 41 with a baby! Yay!


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

Are we going to do a new one each month? The name of the tribe plus March. I like the "at and over 40" since I wasn't quite yet 40 when I joined in, and I am actually 40 now! (Not 40+ though, unless we're counting days beyond turning 40, then I guess I am!)

My dd turned 11 months old today!!!







: I mention that just for fun! Next month is the big 01!!


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## jrabbit (May 10, 2008)

i nominate "40-ish"


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

40-ish is good. I still like "littles" in reference to the dc.


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

I like 40ish as well. That way I will fit, since I am not quite 40.


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

Is there a tribe for 40ish with littles AND annoying dogs??


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *hrsmom* 
Is there a tribe for 40ish with littles AND annoying dogs??

















:


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

Well we HAVE to have Jenny (Kidzaplenty) and Kimberly or I'm going to throw a temper tantrum so I want 40-ish too.

Do we even need a tribe for ginormous age gaps or are there enough of us here that it doesn't get annoying when I talk about my older kids or ask questions about keeping the baby from chewing on iPods and the best way to keep him from hurting himself on big bro's skateboard and the like?


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## jrabbit (May 10, 2008)

we NEED the age-gap conversations, spider









i'm glad y'all like 40-ish!


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

You guys are fun!!!! OK, I'll keep my eyes peeled for a new thread! (Now that I'm 40ish I talk like that!!)









Thanks for laughing at my dog joke, lovebeingamommy! It was one of those mornings. I'm not bugged by them today. It's amazing what semi-decent sleep does for a body! (And an attitude!!!!)


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## jrabbit (May 10, 2008)

ok - is there a new thread yet?

i have to share this: http://philhyde.smugmug.com/gallery/...89957199_CbeZJ


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

***ok, seriously having a problem here....new thread is on it's way


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jrabbit* 
ok - is there a new thread yet?

i have to share this: http://philhyde.smugmug.com/gallery/...89957199_CbeZJ

That is just WAY too cute!


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## SuzymomofLaura (Mar 4, 2006)

Oh Jrabbit how I adore the photo of your elder dd with the little one in the sling








Isn't it a blessing beyond words to have more than one? If I weren't so exhausted it would make me wish for a third dd too...


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

I love those pictures, jrabbit! I love it when people post pictures! If that were my LO she'd be ALL OVER that computer! (As will yours in due time!)









Kate, when you start the new thread, you can add that I have a little girl born April 08. It just says that I'm 40 right now!

Happy Friday!!!! On the one hand, the day it is doesn't really matter, since we're on baby time for the most part. On the other hand, I do work from home and the weekend means that I don't have to mess with any phone calls, yippeee!!!!







:


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

Janis- I meant to respond before- you mentioned EC, sounds like you already EC'ed with a babe? Very cool. We've done EC as well and it's been good. Sometimes I wonder if I'd sleep more at night if we weren't doing EC, but I think that's my brain making things up, since I have no idea what things would be like if we weren't!

Speaking of sleep, last night (this morning) was not so much fun! Hannah was up from 3:30-5:30, for no particular reason that I could tell. I'm sure she had a reason, but it wasn't a need to go potty (we went a couple of times and she did go) and she nursed a ton, and we were snuggling. She wasn't fussy at all, didn't make a peep, just AWAKE! This was after waking up at 2:30. After she finally fell asleep, I did get 3 hours of sleep, but oh my eyes are stinging today!


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## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

jrabbit....I love those pictures. And it made my new baby (due in three weeks) even more real to me. I can hardly wait!


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Ok.... here are a couple of Ashlee eating her first ice cream cone!!









With a spoon

Without a spoon

She LOVED it!


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Jezzy* 
Ok.... here are a couple of Ashlee eating her first ice cream cone!!









Without a spoon

She LOVED it!

too cute!


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## Jezzy (Sep 20, 2006)

Thanks, for some reasoon the first pic with a spoon didn't show up so I re-added it.


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *claras_mom* 
jrabbit....I love those pictures. And it made my new baby (due in three weeks) even more real to me. I can hardly wait!

three weeks! Yay!!!!!!








:







:


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

http://www.mothering.com/discussions....php?t=1054858

The NEW THREAD TITLED _40-ish with Littles Tribe Mar./Apr. '09_ is here please check us out







:


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