# 3 year old, buying pants weekly, refuses to wear jeans, need help



## Caneel (Jun 13, 2007)

Here is my situation.

DS is 3 years old. For reasons we can't identify, he refuses to wear jeans.

Now, I don't really care what he wears. If he wants to pick out his own clothes, fine with us.

The problem is wear and tear on the pants he will wear. These pants include khakis, sweatpants, corduroys, and wind pants (the lined nylon kind). Basically any pants but jeans.

Between the carpet and playgrounds a day care and the brick floor in our kitchen, he is shredding pants weekly.

Sometimes, I only get one or two wearing out of his pants. I can't even patch the knees as it is like someone took a belt sander to the knees, the fabric wears so thin, it sort of disappears rather than rips.

His reasons are that he "doesn't like jeans" It doesn't matter if daddy or I are wearing them or Big Bird has jeans on. (I have tried dressing his favorite characters in his jeans, no luck.)

He has 4 pairs of jeans. All appear to fit just fine and there are no hidden scratchy tags or other unpleasant issues.

DH and I have looked really hard at this issue. DS is allowed to make his own choices (within reason) in nearly all areas of his life so I don't think he is picking the jeans as the only battle he thinks he can win.

Every day since mid-September, I have tried to get him in jeans. I don't make a big deal out of it but I gently keep offering/suggesting that jeans would be a good choice.

Is this a phase?

I am sort of at wits end. I had to buy five more pairs of pants today. Since mid-September, I bought at least 15 pairs. This has to stop.

Help! How do I get my DS to wear jeans?

Or does anyone have a recommendation on semi-indistructable pants?


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## _betsy_ (Jun 29, 2004)

You can get those iron-on patches to reinforce the knees from the inside. Is it primarily the knees he's tearing apart?

Where are you buying pants? If it's the target or KMart house brand or whatever, you may want to try something pricier with thicker fabric. DD's never worn through a pair of Children's Place pants, but the Target stuff doesn't last forever. Sears still sells OshKosh and Toughskins, I believe, and those come with some sort of guarantee.


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## goodcents (Dec 19, 2002)

It is totally a phase. I know it is extremely frustrating but it does get better. My DD was very specific about her clothes b/t 3-5. The seams had to be almost non existent. She never ever wore jeans. But she is 5.5 now and she loves jeans.

One thing I have to say is that I really notice a difference if I spend a few dollars more at a better store for clothes. Bathing suits are a great example....I can get 1 at Target for $12 but if I spend $18 at another store the suit lasts and lasts (and we swim all the time). Have you thought about patching the knees before there are holes present? Can you put down a play rug in the kitchen?


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## mamabeca (Oct 3, 2004)

My ds is also jeans averse (3yr10mos). He just likes soft pants, I can get him into jeans very rarely (like maybe 2x in 2 yrs). My ds doesn't seem to be ripping through pants as quickly as yours, some wear faster than others. My and his faves are fleece pants, they seem to be warm and thick enough to protect his knees during school or play on the playground or at home/friends houses. Next fave are sweatpants. I do not put him into kakhis much, they don't fit him super well. He also has a variety of 'other' pants, like velvety ones and cords that he will wear. I prefer the lined cords, which we've found at 2nd hand stores irregularly, and I think Rugged Bear or Children's Place may carry them. I *may* be a phase, or he may just be sensitive to textures. My neighbors (twin boys) will wear jeans once in a while, now, but mostly they wear sweats and fleece (10yo). He surely is who he is, so maybe finding a way to reinforce the knees w/denim would be one solution? I mean before he wears them, sew the knee patches on.

Good luck, mama!


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## chaoticzenmom (May 21, 2005)

You might try a thriftstore. As someone who hates, hates, hates jeans, I'm siding with your son on this one.LOL Is he highly sensitive? Does he need his tags taken out, can't sleep well in polyester pj's and needs comfortable shoes or no shoes at all?

I have a friend who's son eats his shirts, so she has to get all of his shirts anywhere she can find them for 99 cents, which is usually at a thrift store. Also, once your son stops playing as much on the floor, his pants will last longer. My daughter is 6, also hates jeans and has just stopped putting holes into all of her pants.


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## lovemyfamily6 (Dec 27, 2006)

I have a friend with 5 year old twins and neither of them like jeans at all. All of my kids love jeans and even choose them to sleep in instead of jammies.









My twins go through jeans like crazy. I buy at Children's Place because they fit best, but I buy them a pair a month usually. I love shorts weather!

If you don't buy from thrift stores, I'd recommend Sears because of the Kidvantage program. If they wear out before they're outgrown, Sears will replace them in the same size for free.


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## Mamato3wild ponnie (Jan 6, 2007)

How about kaiki's that are different colors...Gymboree has them with enforced knee's. Or different colored jeans? What about dressing him in his sleep and see what he does when he wakes up and dont say anything about it.


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## llamalluv (Aug 24, 2007)

Yikes.

Could you get him to wear knee pads?


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## Ruthla (Jun 2, 2004)

Land's End makes "school uniform pants" that look like khakis (but come in navy and black too) but wear like jeans. Some styles come in toddler sizes and the rest start in a 4 (depending on the size of your 3yo, he may need toddler sizes or he may fit into a size 4.)

He may tolerate these pants even if he doesnt' like jeans...or, if it's a sensitivity issue, these may cause the same problems. Have you been able to identify what it is about jeans he doesn't like?


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## AbiSolsticebaby (Jan 16, 2006)

I just wanted to chime in because I was a kid that could not stand jeans until I was about 10 or 12. I think it is important to respect your child's wishes on this one. It's his body. That sucks about the holes though.
Great idea about Sears its awesome that they will replace clothing.
Good luck to you and your boys pants.


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## Evan&Anna's_Mom (Jun 12, 2003)

Neither of my children likes jeans either. For DS we mostly did shorts once he was past crawlying age, but then we live in San Diego where its almost always warm enough for shorts. For those rare days when he needed more he was good in sweat pants. He wouldn't tolerate chino type things or cords either, so you are ahead there. I know that Lands End makes a variety of pants with reinforced knees, including some of their boys sweat pants. They would be pricier, but might last longer. Try their overstocks option, especially if he isn't picky about colors.


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## mama2cal&darby (Jun 13, 2008)

I would also respect your son't wishes. My DS1 won't wear jeans either, as he is highly sensitive. I don't push it, though he doesn't go through pants like yours does. I know that the Gap will (or used to anyway) replace adult clothing if it got damaged. I don't know if they do the same for kids clothes>


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## nextcommercial (Nov 8, 2005)

I hate pants. I will wear shorts til it's just beyond cold.

My dd hated anything that "choked her knees". So she had to try pants on and do a few weird moves to see if they were "chokey". ALL dresses had to "twirl up". Heaven forbid a dress not twirl up.

I suggest trying to find a few pairs of second hand lands end sweat pants and see if those hold up any better. Some places sell pants with the reinforced knees already in them.

OR, just get the super cheap-os at Walmart and buy them in bulk.

I remember when my daughter was in grade school, and she wore through the knees of all her pants after just a few wearings too. I made me crazy. And she was way too old for that too.


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## UUMom (Nov 14, 2002)

My little kids don't like jeans, so I don't see that as an issue at all However, we never had the shredding problem, and they were/are super-active. It seems rather excessive to be wearing out pants weekly. Maybe have 7 pairs he likes and rotate them so none of them get massive wear all at once. Try Savers or Goodwill for cheap pants. I can get my nephew- age 3 and wants soft sweatpants only- for about 1.99-2.99. I've gotten great brands for cheapola.

I would find a cheap source of clothing before I made him wear clothing that bothered him. The Wear Jeans hill is not one I would die on.

Btw, my ds come by the jean ick-factor thing honestly as I am a thick cotton tights kind of person in winter and a skirt/capri person in warm weather. I just don't care for the texture. If I wear regular jeans out for a day, I come home and peel them off like cheap panty hose.


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## reader18 (Jun 14, 2007)

http://www.sears.com/shc/s/nb_10153_...00100383&aff=Y

maybe this would help. i belong and have gotten the 15% off coupons before, i've never had to use their wear out warranty, so i don't know how easy it is to use, but it seems like it could be a great deal if your kid is rough on clothes.

sorry, i'm nak and trying to type with my left hand.


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## LynnS6 (Mar 30, 2005)

Somewhere around age 3, I gave up. Ds wore pants with holes in them for 2 years. I just couldn't afford to buy him enough sweatpants (which is all that he would wear) to have him have pants without holes. I think it must be genetic, as we found a picture of my late FIL recently where HE had holes in the knees of his pants too!

We had one pair for church/good that he wore only on special occasions and took off as soon as we got home. It didn't bother ds to have holes in his pants, it bothered me. So, in the interests of fiscal solvency, I had to let it quit bothering me.

Reasons ds didn't like jeans:
1. He didn't like the rough fabric. He's got sensory processing disorder and at age 3 was EXTREMELY hypersensitive to touch/texture. He started occupational therapy at age 5 and after about a year was able to wear jeans. (I'm not saying your son has SPD, just that's why my son couldn't wear jeans.)

2. His fine motor skills suck (it's related to his sensory issues). He couldn't button or snap them to get to the toilet in time. Once he was potty trained, he HATED the thought of having an accident and so it was crucial for him to be able to get his own pants down in a hurry.

If I'd known about the Sears replacement program at the time, we would have been there weekly!

Lands' End also sells double kneed pants that wear really well. Alas, I didn't want to pay $25 a pair for those!

Ds is 7 now. Only 2 of his pairs of pants have holes in them (he just put a hole in his church pants last week







: because he forgot to change out of them when we got home).


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## mamazee (Jan 5, 2003)

I don't have time to read everything, so sorry if someone already suggested this, but put patches on BEFORE the knees get worn rather than after. And get good big patches. The patches will probably hold up better than the knees would have.

Good luck!


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## crunchymomofmany (May 24, 2007)

I truly hate to say this - but as the mom of four boys I have to say that even the jeans never made it in my house for longer than a week before those little holes started to appear! There were times when the boys went out with full holes from seam to seam because I simply had not gotten to a store yet. And thrift stores - while great - are terrible for finding boys' pants because all the boys in town have worn out the knees in their pants too!

If your kid is hard on the knees, it doesn't matter what pants he wears - except Carhartts - they last a long time - but also are not infallible (sp?). And they're expensive.

I always reinforced the boys pants with patches on the inside of the pants (so they didn't rip them off), and rolled my eyes a lot! On the upside, we had a lot of cutoffs in the summer!

Evil Walmart (I know, I'm sorry) has those Garanimals pants that are jersey knit athletic pants really cheap! Like $4.50 a pair. I buy those by the gross for my almost 4 year old.

Hope that helps - and doesn't bum you out too much!


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## tbone_kneegrabber (Oct 16, 2007)

trendyblanks.com sells american appareal clothes cheap and they have pants that are not jeans

thrift stores

let him wear pants with holes in them







: i wear them and so does ds


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## oiseau (Mar 30, 2008)

I'm gonna 2nd or 3rd checking out Sears and the KidVantage program. I don't have kids yet, but my mom got almost all of me & my brothers clothes there and remember her getting tons of stuff replaced when my brother wore it out.
Good luck!


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## mamaduck (Mar 6, 2002)

Last year, DS tore out the knees in every pair of pants he owned. I replaced them, and he ripped out the knees of all the new pants in the first week. So I just sent him to school in kneeless pants everyday. When the holes got so large that he began to feel a draft, he started wearing them backwards. Somehow, in his 7 yo. mind, this was a sensible solution. Then he ripped out the back side too. FTR, this year he has started tolerating jeans for the first time in his life, but he ripped the knees out of them too. We buy from Children's Place, btw, and the knees still ripped.


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## pauletoy (Aug 26, 2007)

My 4yo DS hates jeans and will throw a fit if I even look like I want him to wear them.

He has ezema and his skin is extremely sensitive. A tag in a shirt can send him off the deep end. He says that jeans are just too scratchy. For now, I have given up on the jean battle.

Maybe just give up on the jeans and try cargo pants.


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## Otterella (Oct 13, 2007)

How would he be with something like this?
http://knitty.com/ISSUEwinter05/PATTblu.html

To make it even more durable, you could make it a larger size and felt it.


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## ASusan (Jun 6, 2006)

If it's the waistband on the jeans, have you tried denim overalls?

I don't like a tight waistband.


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## Limabean1975 (Jan 4, 2008)

If he's wearing through all those other pants so quickly, I don't think jeans are going to last much longer. The brick floor stood out to me though - have you thought about a nice area rug?


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## Caneel (Jun 13, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Ruthla* 
Land's End makes "school uniform pants" that look like khakis (but come in navy and black too) but wear like jeans. Some styles come in toddler sizes and the rest start in a 4 (depending on the size of your 3yo, he may need toddler sizes or he may fit into a size 4.)

He may tolerate these pants even if he doesnt' like jeans...or, if it's a sensitivity issue, these may cause the same problems. Have you been able to identify what it is about jeans he doesn't like?

I buy his pants primarily from Lands End, sometimes from LLBean, Gymboree and Baby Gap.

We don't have a tag or "itch-y" problem with his clothing. He wears khakis and twill cargo pants all the time. I think I will try the uniform pants and put patches in prior to wearing.

I never knew that about Sears! There is a Sears right down the road so I will check that out.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Limabean1975* 
If he's wearing through all those other pants so quickly, I don't think jeans are going to last much longer. The brick floor stood out to me though - have you thought about a nice area rug?

Oh yes, we have tried an area rug. It is actually a very large brick hearth and it is his favorite play area. We have a rug and he takes it off immediately. I think he likes to run his trucks on the rough brick.

I think I will make him change as soon as he gets home and let him wear the knee-less pants at home. DH would never let him go to school with holes (I would) but that is a whole different issue.

I am glad to hear it isn't just my kid.


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## paquerette (Oct 16, 2004)

I worked at Penneys about 10 years ago and we had an extremely loose return policy. If you came in with a receipt within the last month and worn out pants we would certainly have let you exchange them. I have no idea if it's still like that.


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## octobermom (Aug 31, 2005)

Quote:

I think I will make him change as soon as he gets home and let him wear the knee-less pants at home. DH would never let him go to school with holes (I would) but that is a whole different issue.
I agree this is a good idea. Our 6 year old wears a uniform for school and holes in the pants violates dress codes and we invested in some nicer mre priocier uniform pants (they hold up great) but rule is at home we change kids rib they spill and all that so its just a lot less stressfull.
Deanna


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## Red Pajama (Jun 11, 2007)

My twins are three and a half and hate jeans, too. One hates the button, he wants elastic waist pants. And he's right, those are easier for quick bathroom breaks. The other boy is just shaped wrong to fit well in jeans, as he still has a toddler belly. So I sympathize.

We have a lot of sweat-pant style pants, some dressier than others, but still that material. They seem to last.


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## nancy926 (Mar 10, 2003)

LLBean has a 100% guarantee on everything they sell. So start sending back his shredded pants for new ones.









Jiffy Shirts sells sweatpants for about $6 a pair. Or you could find a store that sells used kids' clothing - Once Upon A Child has everything arranged by size and type.

You might see if you can find velour pants for boys. Sounds weird, but my older DD has never liked jeans, and last year she wore the knees out of several pairs of pants. However, her velour ones (which she wore a LOT) just looked a teensy bit worn at the knees.

I would not force him to wear jeans...I am not sure they wear better than other pants, anyway. My DH is always getting holes in the knees of his jeans, and he doesn't romp around on the floor *too* much.


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## La Rune (Sep 19, 2008)

I also wanted to suggest the Sears program.

My other idea was Dickies. They do make little kids' sizes and you can get them with reinforced knees. You'd get more wear out of those if he'll wear them.


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## kriket (Nov 25, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *La Rune* 
I
My other idea was Dickies. They do make little kids' sizes and you can get them with reinforced knees. You'd get more wear out of those if he'll wear them.

I love dickies even as an adult.

I can't believe he's wearing out cords! I have had some pairs that were like wearing kevlar!


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## oliversmum2000 (Oct 10, 2003)

sorry my 8yo is very similar he will only wear tracksuit bottoms, he finds them so comfortable, but i guess it is an improvement on when he was younger where he didnt ever want to wear anything apart from pyjamas - i guess he is branching out!


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## Village Mama (Jul 22, 2004)

I have one son that loves soft clothes. When we could get regular pants on him he would strip the second we got in the door and get into his PJs.

My second son will only wear stiff clothes!!! The more stiff the jeans the better! He will not wear soft clothes at all.... wears jeans to bed! Also a belt ... and his shirt tucked right in. Sigh! Sensory seeking kiddo! If so many kids don't like stiff pants , how come I cant find any at the thrift store!lol


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## sapphire_chan (May 2, 2005)

Will he wear jeans/heavier pants over other pants? Especially now that it's winter, it might be worth asking him to try.

Also, have you tried thriftstores? I know there aren't many 100% clean kids clothes in those places, but if it's for stuff he's playing in, that shouldn't matter as much. (







unless all the boy pants have knee holes.) Okay, so if all you can find is pink and it bugs you, get all the 100% cotton pants and a pack of dark dye and have at it.


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## sapphire_chan (May 2, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *kriket* 
I love dickies even as an adult.

I can't believe he's wearing out cords! I have had some pairs that were like wearing kevlar!

Ooo, there's a thought. A yard or two of Kevlar would make quite a few knee patches.


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## sapphire_chan (May 2, 2005)

Having read more, how about knee pads for playing at home on the brick?


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## GooeyRN (Apr 24, 2006)

I can't wear jeans, either. I don't like the thick and strong feel of the fabric, no matter how many times they have been washed. It gives me the willies! I can only wear super soft stuff.


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