# Babysitting at night - won't go to sleep - Cries



## J2 (Aug 12, 2006)

DS (now 5mos) used to be able to go to sleep at night with a bottle (at that time it was really hard to nurse him enough at night for him to sleep, so I would pump at night for the next night's bottle). Then I could finally nurse him enough to go to sleep at night so we've been doing that the past few months. So now he is really used to nursing to sleep so now it is difficult to put him to bed with just a bottle if Grandma is watching him. He'll drink the bottle and then cry for like 15mins while in Grandma's arms before he finally falls asleep.

This is so heartbreaking to me. I don't want him to cry like that. So we have been trying to practice with a bottle at home so that if grandma is babysitting he can easily go to sleep. But its not working too well, even though it used to work great. I still end up nursing him to sleep after the bottle. He obviously loves the warmth and comfort of mommy (I'm so glad he does!) but how do I help him be able to go to sleep at night without me there? Even while practicing at home he cried for DH and for me too.


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## CalBearMama (Sep 23, 2005)

I've only left DS with someone else at bedtime a few times in his life (he's now 22 months), so I can't say that I've found anything great that works, but I did have a few thoughts when I read your post:

1. Maybe you could practice putting him to sleep some other way, such as wearing him around the house in a sling or other carrier, and see if he will just fall asleep. Then, when Grandma babysits, she could do the same thing and maybe it would feel familiar enough to him to enable him to fall sleep without crying.

2. The only ways my DS will go to sleep are: (1) lying next to me during or after nursing; (2) in his car seat when he's really tired; or (3) sitting next to his nanny on the couch with the television on (not something I'm thrilled about, but she says it's the only way he will fall asleep easily with her). So, maybe Grandma could try lying next to him after he has his bottle (or while he's drinking it, if that's possible), or taking him for a little drive, or just relaxing with some soft music on for background noise.

Whether or not any of these ideas work may depend on how often he sees Grandma or how much time he spends with her. Some of his crying may be due to separation/stranger anxiety. Babies change so quickly - one minute, they're happy to be held by anyone and everyone, but the next minute they want mom and only mom (and even dad won't do). Hope you find something to make this easier on everyone.


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