# What books, characters, themes do you avoid for your toddler?



## JudiAU (Jun 29, 2008)

If so, what are they?

I like natural wooden toys for DS and we read a lot of books. I am a librarian (but not in a children's setting) and really enjoyed the classes I took in children's literature.

But we recently received two children's books that I really dislike. It got me to thinking about books and characters that other MDC families might have experienced. Thoughts?

We received Nobunny's Perfect. It is all about "bad bunnies." The second is "Llama Llama Misses Momma" and it includes language about llama "hates that book."

Why on earth use language like that for a small child!


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## amandaleigh37 (Jul 13, 2006)

I've been surprised at some books that look cute & harmless but include things like you mentioned. One board book we had - I think it was called something like "How do I love you", and one page said something like "I even love you when you're bad." I did not like that at all...

We generally try to avoid characters. But my son loves Thomas the train... but even some of those books drive me crazy with all teh teasing & competition!


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## Chamsia (Jan 19, 2007)

It's mighty hard with a girl (she'll be 3 in a few weeks), but OH how I try to avoid princesses!!! I'm sure once she starts preschool she'll become princess obsessed. And I will not thwart it, I promise. Princesses can be fine, sure. They just sort of gross me out. I am trying to embrace pink, since we get so many free pink hand-me-downs, but it's not coming easy to me. It just seems so loaded...though I do think all the truck/sport/dinosoar clothes for boys are even worse.

Anyway, the previous paragraph is all about ME.

For my tot's benefit, I have weeded out books with words like hate, stupid, and dumb. Some of the books I actually like, but trying to skip those words just doesn't work. Too often I'm on autopilot and read it aloud before I remember to omit a word. We read some Lyle the Crocodile book MONTHS ago wherein a girl doesn't like Lyle. We have not read this book in many moons but everyday I still hear my daughter say "I don't like you more than I didn't like you yesterday!" For some reason she loves that phrase.

In general I just try to stay away from characters that are going to be marketed like crazy--Disney etc. But it's not a hard and fast rule. We have a few Disney and Elmo books/videos that we really like. It helps that we don't have television (just videos) so she never sees commercials. And I don't go to stores, so she doesn't see all the plastic crap except at friend's houses. When we're in a big grocery store (rare) and she sees Elmo baloons and what not, she usually just smiles and points at it. I don't think she's ever asked me to buy that stuff. I'm enjoying it while it lasts!

What gets me is that a book or a video can be really great, but nonetheless my daughter will find the one negative phrase therein and repeat it so much that I throw out the baby with the bathwater.

I guess the reason author's use language like "hate" is because they are writing for kids. Emotions are SO STRONG for little ones, and these books do express that. But , of course, we want books that will show how to feel and express that in an appropriate way.


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## SparklingGemini (Jan 3, 2008)

Awww.

I love the Llama Llama books. Although I haven't read the newest one.

Anyway, we're avoiding Barbie. And the idea of girls needing to be rescued. You know the whole Princess saved by the Prince? Its sort of hard because I value the romance, charm and magic of fairy tales but don't want my DD growing up thinking that girls and women need to rescued.


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## Dea (Sep 26, 2006)

I detest Elmo... ick ick ick. And my DH's aunt gave DD one for Christmas, it's currently hidden away.
I'm not too big on the princess thing, but the way I see if, if I had a son and he was into princesses I would encourage it, so I should encourage my daughter too.
Regarding books. I haven't really encountered any yet with words that I don't like. She's only 14 mos, so we're not into vocab heavy books yet.


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## Liquesce (Nov 4, 2006)

None, really. That may make me the odd one out around here, but I have yet to personally encounter a children's book/theme/character that I thought was going to negatively impact my children. I suppose if there were Bratz board books or something I might redirect my kids away from them. Bunny books and such don't offend me though.


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## Sparks* (Feb 3, 2008)

I try to avoid anything that follows social gender stereotypes where all of the females are in caring/nurturing/passive roles, and the males are in agressive/competitive/active roles. That drives me nuts!

I've also found a lot of books to be pretty racist in their illustrations of people of color. Over emphasized lips and noses, extremely slanted eyes, etc. For me, the illustrations are just as important, if not more than the actual text.

I guess my main goal is to not perpetuate stereotypes.


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## stlmomof2 (Mar 30, 2006)

I avoid Eric Carle books. I just hate the pictures. They just look like child drawings. They don't look like whatever the thing is supposed to be. That's got to be confusing for kids who are just starting to develop a concept of something like a caterpillar. I don't like Elmo for a similar reason. There is no counterpart in reality.

I don't think the word "hate" is so bad but I definitely don't like "stupid." My DD says, "I hate these," about green beans and how can I argue? She really doesn't like the taste of them.


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## Cujobunny (Aug 16, 2006)

Well let me say "A Fly Went By" found it's way to Goodwill...

I try not to censor. I would not tell my dc "you can't have that b/c it's Disney" or whatever. If they have a favourite character, or want to play with certain toys, I have no issue. I also don't tell people not to buy my kids certain things, there's no use. They'll probably end up with Princesses, Cars, whatever. Anything is ok in moderation IMO and anything can be a teaching/learning opportunity.

I started reading my ds some chapter books and we picked one up from the library, the series was "My Weird School". The book we got started off with how much the boy HATED school and he just went on and on about that. Fortunately my ds didn't like it, and I didn't hesitate to tell him that I didn't enjoy reading it, but I would have continued had he wanted me to.

I just hope dd isn't going to want Bratz







they creep me out. But I played with Barbies, and I don't have any body issues. My brothers played with guns and they're not violent.


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## mommariffic (Mar 18, 2009)

Princess things - especially oversexed, pink fluffy lame princess stuff. I do have one book "The Princess in the Forest" and we DO love that, but it's far from the Disney crap so I am okay with it.

I don't like Elmo things, but my mother in law doesn't seem to get that, and she bought my daughter an Elmo chair and talking Elmo doll. I hate to waste them, and she paid good money for them, so I just cringe and try to avoid them as much as possible..

..I think that's it? I don't like Disney stuff, but we ARE going to Disney World in a few weeks, so that's going out the window.


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## *Erin* (Mar 18, 2002)

we try and avoid all disney, especially the princesses. ugh ugh ugh. no dora either. and caillou is also banned. i dont like eric carle either, but ds LOVES the one, i can do it, can you? anything with negativity in it-calling someone "bad" or "naughty" is out, and anything with stereotypes of gender that are extreme are out, too. i edit the violent peter rabbit stories, and reword some nursery rhymes, too.


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## lach (Apr 17, 2009)

We do not do ANYTHING that is a branded, licensed character. The development of the 0-3 market as the largest, most profitable demographic makes me spittingly angry, and we do not watch those shows, buy those toys (cups, diapers, stickers, bottles of bubbles, clothes, food, etc). Period. When my DD receives those things, they go away. This is my hard and fast rule until age 2 (due to the fact that before age 2 the only thing they get out of such shows is character, and thus brand, loyalty... not any concept of plot) and preferably until 3. I'm not opposed to these things for what they purport to be (princesses, etc), but for what they are: cradle to grave marketing designed to create lifelong consumers with an innate sense of brand loyalty.

Ooh, want to know what makes me really angry? White Corduroy. That's what I call him. The spinoff books, based on the 2 original books. The original books were about a black girl living in the city: in the first one, her family does not have much money, lives in a 4th floor walkup, she saves her pennies. In the second book, they are at an incredibly diverse urban laundromat, owned by a Hispanic man and populated by a wide array of people. But nothing is really made of the diversity or the kind of grittiness: it's all realistic and presented as background information not important to the plot except still kind of there. "This is normal life," KWIM? The spinoffs leave such an incredibly poor taste in my mouth: no humans, just a bunch of cutesie stuffed animals (and I'm sorry, but you can totally tell that they're all white) living in suburbia with actual white picket fences. I actually find it really upsetting that they felt the need to whitewash Corderoy and transport him from a realistic urban environment to Stepford.

Wow, I never knew I was such an angry person, until I reread this post









I loved Llama Llama Red Pajama: one of my favorite kids books. I was fairly horrified at Mad at Mama though. Did not like the attitude at all (and thought some of the rhymes were a bit awkward).

Oh, and I didn't like any of the Five Little Monkey books. I thought the illustrations were ugly, and they didn't scan. The two based on songs added in random words which broke the rhythm, and the other two were just weird (firemen? WTF?). They don't make me angry, though.







Just mildly annoyed. They went to the library book sale because I really hated reading them to DD. There are so many wonderful kids books out there, I feel that life is too short to waste on books I don't like.


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## Livviesmom0207 (Mar 21, 2007)

I think I'm partially a hypocrite when it comes to this.

I can't stand Dora. I will not buy anything with Dora on it...but I do let her watch Dora sometimes because she LOVES it. My SIL got her into it when she was my DCP for a few months









I don't like anything branded or licensed AT ALL...but I have and will continue to allow my daughter to have Tinkerbell or Hello Kitty stuff because I love them.









I don't like Bratz. I'm on the fence on Barbie, because I played with them and don't have negative body image. In fact, for the last 12+ years, it's been a Christmas tradition that my mom buys my sister and I each a Barbie Hallmark Keepsake Ornament. It seems sort of silly that I would say NO BARBIE to DD and then hang 12+ on the Christmas tree, ykwim?

See? Total hypocrite. haha.


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## Pernillep (Jan 2, 2007)

WE may watch the shows like Dora and Diego. DS loves both. They get to watch 30 min while having breakfast at DCP. He is old enough now so I am ok with that. But I will not buy the marketed crap to go with it. He does not have any diego clothing or books or anything.

I have found a few childrens books I didn't like as I was reading through them and we try to remove anything that has negative messages. HOnestly, I have already forgotten which ones cause they get into a closet after the first read.

That and I do not like Where the wild things are. Just bugs me. Thank god DS doesn't care for it so it went into the hide pile.


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## mamadelbosque (Feb 6, 2007)

The only branded stuff I've allowed thus far has been Winnie the Pooh, Sesame Street & Curious George. Nothing else. I avoid most other shows that have been marketed like mad to kids. But we like curious george, and sesame street. And we like to read winnie the pooh stories (though we've never seen the show). But, we don't have *any* of the toys, and I plan on keeping it that way. Most all of DS' toys are wooden from europe (Haba, Selecta, Bajo, Holtztiger, etc), with a few american plastic toy companie, little tike, etc toys thrown in for outside play.


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## Paeta16 (Jul 24, 2007)

At first I tried to avoid everything...well that didn't work. As soon as she saw Elmo she was IN LOVE! So he's become a part of our lives. At the gym daycare she started playing with a Uniqua doll (Backyardigans) and I don't mind that much. My sister gave her a Barbie and it is still in the box but she'll look at it occasionally and the same sister gave her Disney Princess stroller and high chair - she calls them "Barbies" and counts them.

Thus far we have avoided any knowledge of princesses and girls needing rescuing. This crap is everywhere.

As far as books go, I read one book about babies crying and doing normal baby things and the Mom in the story was constantly saying "No baby No!" ...I never read that again...how annoying. I read books b/f reading them to her and avoid anything out of line with our parenting philosophy in general.


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## Aubergine68 (Jan 25, 2008)

I try to avoid anything that is not quality kids lit. I cringe when I see a beautiful-looking children's book that has really poor quality language/story in it

So that lets out most licensed character spinoffs, though I'd have no prejudice against the original Thomas, Winnie the Pooh or Peter Pan books.

My middle child is right in the middle of his Captain Underpants potty humor phase, and his little brother cannot be prevented from wanting to like what his older brother likes, so I'm a bit more relaxed on the language than I was with my older children.


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## angelamariebee (Jun 20, 2008)

I can't really think of any kind of books I avoid. I figure anything we're reading that I don't agree with can be explained in a way she can understand. I let her pick out pretty much whatever books she wants when we go to the book store (she's not quite responsible enough for library books yet) and I pick out chapter books to read to her at night. Those have some content in them that WILL need to be explained but they are issues we'll have to deal with sooner or later. But for the most part, those books are read a few pages at a time while she's falling asleep so I don't think she absorbs quite as much as when we sit down to read a picture book together. Except her Ramona books, she will fight sleep to hear those stories.


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## stlmomof2 (Mar 30, 2006)

I want to mention that some young children seem to be more focussed on content (e.g. dinosaurs, trains, Dora, Elmo, cats, etc.) and others seem more focussed on activities (e.g. drawing, legos, puzzles, riding bikes, etc.). During her toddlerhood and now, my 3.5 yo seems to be more of the activity type. She does not get obsessed with certain characters or types of information. She's more likely to bug me to buy her every kind of art supply rather than everything with a certain character on it. So I really don't worry about brands and never think to ban anything. But if DS ends up being a child who is more obsessed with content, I might be quick to start cracking down on all the offending stuff.

I forgot about Dora. She annoys me but I'm not really against her, I guess.


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## anabellee (Jul 3, 2005)

Barney is on the top of my annoying list. we tend to stay away from too much brand/label type things. we do watch the Pixar movies so the boys like Cars, Wall-E, and Nemo. they also enjoy Thomas. we just don't go overboard and buy all the plastic crap that goes along with it. ds1's bedroom is Car's theme but just sheets and some wall hangings. I don't like buying the toys that go along with the shows because, for the most part, they're all plastic crap that the boys will just destroy anyway. as for Thomas, we have the toys but I don't think they realize that it's a TV show


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## MPsSweetie (Jan 29, 2006)

When it comes to books I don't worry about too much. Wait... I HATE Rugrats books. It is written in baby talk and feel so silly reading it. Other than that I just go with what feels comfortable for me to read aloud, which is sometimes different than what my DD likes to read. I usually just skip the words stupid, hate, dumb, etc... My DD doesn't like those words either, lol.
We have TONS of books, and I can't think of one that was bought new by me (I goodwill), so I'm not worried about buying into characters too much. Clothes are a different story.


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## Keeper at Home (Oct 8, 2007)

We've come across a few really bad books given to us as gifts. The worst one that I can remember was about a little boy who couldn't read, talk, write, etc., and his dad was disappointed, wondering "what was wrong with him." So he ignored his son and watched TV until one day, POOF, the boy could suddenly do all those things and the dad paid attention to him again.







That book went right in the trash.

We're also starting to realize how sensitive our 23 mo DD is and are having to censor stories dealing with "good vs. evil" because the bad characters are very frightening to her. We were given a book with pictures of various Disney characters and she saw the illustration of the scary looking hag giving Snow White an apple -- once she saw that she got very upset and refused to go near the book again. She's also scared of the troll in the story Three Billy Goats Gruff.

We haven't come across anything like this yet because our children are so young, but we will not have any books around that have themes of children being disrespectful, selfish, mean, etc. and there are no consequences and/or moral lesson.

And I hate the Baby Einstein materials.


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## Chamsia (Jan 19, 2007)

Quote:

_Ooh, want to know what makes me really angry? White Corduroy. That's what I call him. The spinoff books, based on the 2 original books. The original books were about a black girl living in the city: in the first one, her family does not have much money, lives in a 4th floor walkup, she saves her pennies. In the second book, they are at an incredibly diverse urban laundromat, owned by a Hispanic man and populated by a wide array of people. But nothing is really made of the diversity or the kind of grittiness: it's all realistic and presented as background information not important to the plot except still kind of there. "This is normal life," KWIM? The spinoffs leave such an incredibly poor taste in my mouth: no humans, just a bunch of cutesie stuffed animals (and I'm sorry, but you can totally tell that they're all white) living in suburbia with actual white picket fences. I actually find it really upsetting that they felt the need to whitewash Corderoy and transport him from a realistic urban environment to Stepford._

Oh, I agree completely!!! I HATE those spinoff books. My mom tried to tell me they're swell as they raise money for some charity in the original Corduroy author's name. But he must be rolling in his grave. Where is Lisa? I miss her! I miss her apartment and the laundromat and her tired mother! Bring back Lisa!!!


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## Daphneduck (Jan 22, 2009)

I don't like any books with the word "stupid." Thats about it. I don't ban princesses, Dora, Thomas, Elmo, etc.. I don't ban anything that she has an interest in, as far as book or characters go. I do hate Bratz, thats my exception. There will be no Bratz in my house. I loved my Barbies though, still have most of them, and can't wait until DD is interested.


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## nolonger (Jan 18, 2006)

I'm fairly particular about what I read to this baby because he is so very young, enjoys books so much, and our reading time is limited. I have decided that, for now, I want to avoid anthropomorphized animal stories and spend our time reading books that portray nature realistically or portray human situations happening to human characters.

I also don't like reading toys-come-to-life stories to him because they kind of scared me as an itsy-bitsy and might have contributed to my becoming overly attached to inanimate objects rather than devoting those energies towards real friendships with real people.

Yes, I know that means that I'm passing up some wonderful children's literature right now, but it's only until he gets a bit more maturity and has a better grasp of how the world works and the difference between reality and fantasy.


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## Miasmamma (Sep 20, 2006)

I will say that Dh and I don't buy character/licensed stuff, but if my family/friends buy it, I just censor what it is before DD wants it. It's a little harder now that she's older and has friends her age who LOVE the princess crap! But the most I hear from her is that she wants to wear a dress b/c she wants to be a princess. If that's all I hear, then she can wear the dress. She's pretty good about realizing that I'm not going to let her wear a good dress outside to play in her sandbox though!









I am VERY picky about what we read. I can and do change the phrasing in certain stories. She likes the books that I pick out at the library for her. She looks at the kids magazines while I get the books right now. I will say that I can't stand the Clifford books. We have rented the movies, and while they are annoying, the books are awful! We had one about Clifford and his friends going to a construction site to play; it was horrible! One of the dogs looks like he/she is drunk and there are none of the same character's from the cartoons. So we avoid them now!

We are currently reading Ginger Jumps and What Elephant?. Ginger Jumps is a cute book about a circus dog looking for a family of her own, and What Elephant is a book about an elephant that moves in with George, but none of his friends believe him! DD likes it and will "read" it to her babies before she lets me read it to her!


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## bohmproof (Dec 17, 2008)

I personally think Thomas characters are super creepy.. i think it's the eyes and the messages are terrible in the few that I have watched.. but DS LOVES trains.. we have the brio train track and the thomas trains.. but I bought them off a friend that her boys had out grown it.. I would have never paid store price for that stuff.

I don't care for sponge bob either, but DH thinks its funny.







: and I don't actively seek out licened toys or characters new, but if I find a good deal on craigslist for a game or toy that I know my son would enjoy I will pick it up..(usually toy story just because they are so hard to find)

As far as books go, when my son finds interest in something around him, I find a little golden book at the goodwill for 50C that can relate.. .some are movies like dumbo and cars, some about rabbits (we raised and butchered as an experiment), trains, ect.


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## MPsSweetie (Jan 29, 2006)

We also don't like Dick and Jane books.


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## shanniesue2 (Jul 4, 2007)

Oooh! A perfect thread to rant about this awful book that our school librarian read to my kindergarten kids the other day... It was a Froggy book... and I normally like the froggy books... I think the one about Froggy getting dressed is hysterical, and I had a preschool class rename it "Froggy Forgets his underwear" Anyway, I digress...

This one was about Froggy getting a new baby sister (or brother I can't remember... it doesn't really matter). Anyway, mom has this big preggo belly and froggy keeps asking her if it's the day for her to have the baby, and she says "maybe" so then she and daddy frog decide to go off to the hospital (no labor, so I'm assuming she was induced?). Froggy waits and worries until mom comes home with the new baby tadpole. The next page talks about mom giving the baby a bottle with creamed flies (bottle feeding AND adding cereal to the bottle). The problem with the bottle feeding the baby tadpole is that 1. it normalizes bottle feeding (and I avoid all text/picture that do this) and 2. you can't even fix it by saying something about how mommy could nurse the baby frog because how on earth does a breastfeeding FROG make sense.... for that matter, how on earth do a frog with a pregnant belly giving birth to a LIVE baby tadpole make any kind of sense?????? FROGS are NOT mammals... humph! Anyway, the baby tadpole sleeps all by herself in a little bassinet/rocker thing and when she cries Froggy has to go comfort her because apparently mommy is nowhere to be found (the book doesn't say that mommy isn't around, but I can't figure out why mommy wouldn't show up when her baby is crying). And all through the book, Froggy wants to take care of his new baby sister, but can't until she has legs and then the moment she does have legs, mommy decides to just send her off to the pond with Froggy.... doesn't go with them to supervise or anything... Froggy even has to teach her how to eat solids (catch flies), but then it's all "okay" in the end because they come home from the pond and mommy feeds her some mashed up cereal.

It was THE MOST HORRIBLE BOOK I've ever read. I'd rather read a book that has disney princesses calling dora and her cousin diego stupid because at least I could give some sort of explanation or teaching about that.


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## catina (Nov 12, 2008)

Very likely real frog babies are unsupervised.
I also dislike commerical books, spin offs, etc. But I don't forbid them. I don't buy them, but if she wants them from the library, I don't mind. She has hundreds of books at home (no exagerration, as I have a professional interest--I teach children's lit), and almost all of those are high quality. By seeing the contrast, hopefully she will see that some books are "richer" than others. She does admit that some books are "lame."
The need to have morals in children's literature is something that dates back hundreds of years. . . . but no child is going to really care about a moral if it isn't written in an interesting, imaginative way. This is the time to develop imagination, silliness, fun, enchantment, etc. For me, the quality of the author's and illustrator's imaginations is the most important thing. After all, I can teach my child morals. But I cannot come up with anything as marvellous as Dr. Suess.
Btw, for multicultural themes, I recommend Patricia Polacco's books.


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## KJoslyn78 (Jun 3, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mommariffic* 
Princess things - especially oversexed, pink fluffy lame princess stuff. *I do have one book "The Princess in the Forest"* and we DO love that, but it's far from the Disney crap so I am okay with it.

I don't like Elmo things, but my mother in law doesn't seem to get that, and she bought my daughter an Elmo chair and talking Elmo doll. I hate to waste them, and she paid good money for them, so I just cringe and try to avoid them as much as possible..

..I think that's it? I don't like Disney stuff, but we ARE going to Disney World in a few weeks, so that's going out the window.

We love the _Princess in the Forest_ also! We also like _The Very Hungry Caterpillar_, _Chicka Chicka Boom Boom_, and a couple others - but i cant think of titles - just know the covers when they are passed my way!

We try to avoid most commercialized stuff - thought having my oldest as a 4th grader in PS bring in a lot of "wanting this" and "needing that"... bah. I in particular dislike Barbie, Bratz and Diney Princesses, but my girls do have a few of these toys (family from holidays, birthdays), but i really try to avoid the books - the whole "needing to be save" idea and such. Thankfully they make up their own wild stories with their toys, or i'd be more likely to give them the heave ho too


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## stlmomof2 (Mar 30, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *shanniesue2* 
It was THE MOST HORRIBLE BOOK I've ever read. I'd rather read a book that has disney princesses calling dora and her cousin diego stupid because at least I could give some sort of explanation or teaching about that.

hahah.... That would be a somewhat subversive children's book. Potty mouthed princesses.
That frog book does sound horrible. Reminds me somewhat of Richard Scarry books with their incredibly ridiculous depictions of animals.


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## alekslasce (May 6, 2009)

Dora, Barney, Thomas the Train, Bratz, Barbie. UGH almost every characters. DD LOVES Elmo and Rugrats stuff though.

I hate Barbies, they scare me







Thanks to my cousin, I'm afriad of them and any doll for that matter. So I barely get DD dolls becuase of my phobia, yeah silly I know.
My mum gave DD a porcelain doll for her birthday, becuase she said it looked like her. I "forgot" to bring it here. It's just terrifying.


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## ebbybaby (Nov 30, 2008)

Fifi the Flowertot and the Backyardigan's both have scary scary themes on treehouse, I NEVER let her watch these 2 shows. Scary theatrical singing, its too intense for some lil kids I think.


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## EdnaMarie (Sep 9, 2006)

We avoid:

-Franchises, including Sesame Street although we watch it;
-Advertisements (e.g. Gummy Bears, Cabbage Patch Dolls, etc.);
-Anything with rude children/characters unless the action is clearly described as such ("So-and-so was rude...") and even then, not so much... I can only think of one book, A Fierce Bad Rabbit, that is of that type that we have.

Baby Einstein is out just because the books suck. Sorry, but they are SO BORING. Plot is terrible, they don't scan, they "tear and strain to rhyme" like so many kids' books. Einstein should sue, really, over the abuse of his name. I mean, if he were not dead, obviously.

I just try to get quality books. I think quality has gone downhill. I don't require realistic drawings but it's HARD nowadays, it seems, to find well-drawn characters and plot. Eric Carle has a beautiful feel for color and though the caterpillar is an impressionistic one, it's not bad. My child does not seem at all confused by it.

I had never heard of the so-called "white" Courduroy but that makes me sad.


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## Aubergine68 (Jan 25, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *EdnaMarie* 
W I can only think of one book, A Fierce Bad Rabbit, that is of that type that we have.
(

We love that book here, though I'm not entirely comfortable with the hunting theme and the good-bad theme. Definitely one the children enjoy reading, and acting out, though. Very dramatic, and it gets them interested in the rest of Beatrix Potter!


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## Picard (May 10, 2009)

Between us two parents, the list of books and themes that we avoid is pretty long:
-no disney and the like except for Miffy.
-no overarching discourse of violence (and, I am truly amazed at how many children's books have this theme. These types of books that are given to us are put in the recycling bin).
-no crazy cartoon-type characters. I'm not up on these, because I really dislike cartoons.
-rather no anthropomorphized creatures, like Dinosaurs that go to the gym.

Our one year old has been obsessed with a book about photography that has lots of pictures. We read reference books with pictures about the ocean, cooking, etc. I have been buying these for years in case we were going to have a child one day. We like stories that have to do with everyday life. No moral lessons yet (good-bad; poor-rich; etc.). In practice this means that I am reading him the stories that I grew up with. They are in a different language, so he learns that too as we read. My sisters are great in sending book supplies from my home country. We use wooden and fabric toys as much as we can, but his proves difficult.


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## Brownie~ (Jan 6, 2009)

Here's what we do in our house for our 2 yr old DS.

No commercials or watching TV with us.
No crazy shows with loud music, lots of cutting and editing, etc. (For instance Bob the Builder) He watches "old school" sesame street clips on you tube (he likes Elmo), some Miffy that we record and that's about it.
No Thomas the Tank Engine shows. The engines are so mean to each other! He does have some Thomas trains and a flap book, though.
No characters on his clothes, shoes, etc.
No "Cars." My husband has a particular aversion to this movie (not sure why), so "Cars" is altogether banned in our house.
He has some Winnie the Pooh books, Elmo and other Sesame Street books, and a Dora book. It's kind of hard to totally avoid these things, but I do think we're doing OK curbing their influence in our house.


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## mama_daba (Dec 7, 2004)

we edit stuff that we feel sends a bad message like somehow we got the book _guess how much i love you_ and i completely change the words when i read it to make it not about competing for who loves who more but into something where everyone loves everyone and you get to hug. soon that book will go to the freebox though i just need to remember to take it. no obnoxious books that i can't stand reading. one of the grandmas gave us a book called the magic slippers and it was so poorly written it was painful to read it came with some cute slippers though so we kept those. we don't own a television and i don't see any benefit to screen time for toddlers so no telivision and very very rarly like maybe once every few months my son might watch a short video on youtube if i happen to see one he would like a lot which is pretty much always kitty related. mostly we read books to him that we enjoy or that have stuff he is interested in so lots of books about cats cuz he loves cats and anything cat related and lots of winnie the pooh cuz we like winnie the pooh (old chapter books not the shortened picture books) i have paddington bear on hold at the library and am excited to read that soon. we go to the library several times a week and get anything that looks fun and if it turns out to be well written we keep it out for the full 3 weeks.


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## Ravishing (Mar 19, 2008)

We avoid licensed stuff but also sports - football in particular. We really REALLY can't stand stuff with "Daddy's Little All Star" written all over it. DH wants to burn a shirt our nephew wears that says "I watch ESPN with daddy".

My BIL actually tells his 2 year old son that he has to grow to a specific height and weight so that he will be the perfect quarterback size. It makes us sad.

With that said, should our son come to like a sport later in life we won't discourage him in any way but we won't push him into it either.


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## momtomine (May 7, 2009)

have any of you mamas read an Eloise book? they are horrible. Eloise is a horrible behaved little girl, who gets away with everything because she is rich. that was banned after book one. i usually just try to avoid things that have inappropriate themes, or promote bad behavior. im also not thrilled with the "if you give a mouse a cookie" books. that mouse is so rude.


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## Whistler (Jan 30, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Liquesce* 
None, really. That may make me the odd one out around here, but I have yet to personally encounter a children's book/theme/character that I thought was going to negatively impact my children. I suppose if there were Bratz board books or something I might redirect my kids away from them. Bunny books and such don't offend me though.

This is me too. When I took an online parenting quiz I came up "zen mama" which made me laugh. So far I can't really think of something that's so bad it's going to scar my kids.

For a while I guess I did try to shoo DD away from Caillou because she was imitating his whiny voice and it got under my skin. But I didn't ban him or never let her watch him. I find him annoying but I don't see my dislike of him as a reason to not let DD watch a show she likes.

I use the negatives as teaching tools rather than censoring. For instance, DD lied to us the other day, trying to sneak a toy in somewhere where she wasn't supposed to. In talking it through, she mentioned that Super Why had lied to his mom (that was the plot of the show, solving that and apologizing to mom) so DD thought she'd "try it out" on us. Well, she learned that it wasn't a very good idea to lie to Mom and Dad but we also talked about the difference between fiction and reality and the idea of a story versus real life. I think she learned a lot and she still watches Super Why, which is fine with me.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *momtomine* 
im also not thrilled with the "if you give a mouse a cookie" books. that mouse is so rude.

I love that book! I think it's hilarious.


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## AndVeeGeeMakes3 (Mar 16, 2007)

I didn't read the responses, but I can't stand Caillou (because he's so naughty and not "gentle and kind" - our family mantra) or Max and Ruby (pretty much for the same reason - I hate the way Ruby talks to Max!!!! And where the heck are their parents????!!!)

I'm hoping to avoid potty humor stuff, though I'm not all that optimistic about that. I just have never (even as a child myself) liked that stuff.


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## BeanyMama (Jul 25, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Chamsia* 
It's mighty hard with a girl (she'll be 3 in a few weeks), but OH how I try to avoid princesses!!! I'm sure once she starts preschool she'll become princess obsessed. And I will not thwart it, I promise. Princesses can be fine, sure. They just sort of gross me out. I am trying to embrace pink, since we get so many free pink hand-me-downs, but it's not coming easy to me.

this exactly.

my kids will check out books with popular characters but i detest reading them. licensed characters gives me the *****.


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## lanamommyphd07 (Feb 14, 2007)

I edit out any books that have poor wording, are in the first person, have terrible drawings/artwork, are cartoonish, or commercial. One nursery rhyme book I have from being a kid myself has two rhymes about spanking kids. I usually skip those if she picks that one to read.
dd's favorite books are "everyone poops" and "no david". At first I was squeamish about "no david", but it didn't encourage naughtiness for her, more of a maternal stance "no dabid, no cookies on the counter" she will say


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## Magali (Jun 8, 2007)

We avoid Barney. But that's the only character i can think of. Other than that, we avoid ideas/themes that we don't agree with. Like the book we took out from the library about the little mouse who gets put in her bed for a nap and cries and cries until her tears fill up the room







.


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## ann_of_loxley (Sep 21, 2007)

Violent books of course I try to avoid (it seems all about power rangers etc with boys these days - no thank you.) - and emotional abuse. (though many people may think im pushing it a bit with that) - DS got this book from the library about a kangaroo who was 'grumpy' and wouldn't 'smile' and the book was all about his mother trying to get him to smile by saying 'its nice when you smile'... sweet?...or telling our children its 'bad' to do anything but be happy and smile and why was he grumpy? - Why not talk about our feelings and let us have them and all feelings are okay? lol I didn't like the book or think it was sweet. There was another book and tbh I just can not for the life of me remember except I thought it was so horrible I told dh to take it back to the library and that it was not being read to our son.
TBH - I dont tend to 'sheild' DS. If he shows an interest in something, sure why not?...but by the time they actually start showing a genuine interest in things, they are also usually old enough to talk about them too - so I deff will be sharing my opinion and talking with him about something if I don't like it or disagree with it, etc. (hes not at this stage yet though - DH is the one that still picks out the library books - its their Saturday thing hehe)


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## BaBaBa (Jun 30, 2007)

I avoid licensed or commercial characters unless they are originals (eg., Winnie the Pooh, Peter Rabbit)

I avoid what Charlotte Mason calls 'twaddle' which are books that speak down to children, don't engage their imagination or don't have a developed story line. We've received a few Sandra Boynton books. Ugh! Prime offender!


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## Snuzzmom (Feb 6, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *BaBaBa* 
I avoid licensed or commercial characters unless they are originals (eg., Winnie the Pooh, Peter Rabbit)

So, what is the difference between those and something like Thomas the Train or Dora? Those are original. Or are you meaning the classics?


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## BaBaBa (Jun 30, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Snuzzmom* 
So, what is the difference between those and something like Thomas the Train or Dora? Those are original. Or are you meaning the classics?

Just because Disney got their hands on A A Milne's Pooh and dumbed it down doesn't mean I'll avoid the original books. I avoid commercial characters because I feel they prey on children's emotions and love of the characters to sell merchandise. It's unfortunate that the Beatrix Potter stuff has been licensed but it's not ubiquitous and the quality of the literature is so high I won't give it up.


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## St. Margaret (May 19, 2006)

Some characters are CREATED to develop a marketing "net," to be easy to make into dolls, clothes, lunch boxes, etc. Some are just picked up years later by corporations, and not everyone is going to hold it against the original literature. I kind of feel that way about Sesame Street stuff; the early shows mean so much to DH and me, and DD loves them... although we typically avoid anything that's used to market stuff, because it just makes it difficult when a kid wants something b/c Elmo is on it.

Lana, why do you avoid first person books?

We avoid commercial characters, and princesses. We choose things that convey good messages (which can inlcude being angry, being crazy, working through stuff, dreaming... not just classic virtues







). DH is very picky about the messages and attitudes buried in books for DD, too. He's the anti-princess enforcer in the house







. We DO however play queens and goddesses.


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## spmamma (Sep 2, 2007)

We try to avoid licensed characters as much as possible, with a few exceptions. We have lots of Curious George books around the house, as well as a few hand-me-down Curious George monkeys. Also, DH and I love going to Disneyland (we go at least twice a year), so I've accepted that DD will know who the classic Disney characters are.

With that being said, I don't buy her clothes with characters on them or books. She doesn't watch TV or play games on the computer. She still somehow figured out who Elmo is, though, and she loves him. Thankfully, not to the point of obsession.

At this point, I'm trying to steer her toward more opened ended toys like dolls, play dough, crayons and play food/play kitchens. She's almost 2 YO, so I know I've got a long way to go.

I hate the idea of licensed characters being created to market to children... and encourage them to bug their parents into buying lots of junk. That's why we avoid TV. Plus, I don't want her to grow up too fast.


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## oregonmama79 (May 26, 2008)

Our list is pretty long too:
No Disney-except Baby Einstein --I was so mad when I found out Disney owned them!! UGH! We do have the BE books and some videos -which is the only TV DS can watch -oh and _some_ sesame street
No spiderman, batman etc
No princessess
NO DORA!!
NO Winnie the pooh (i htink that's Disney-right?)
Absolutely NO clothing with commerical characters on it--even if it's free and 2nd hand.
No Disneyland for us.
I wish no Elmo, but he just loves Elmo and Sesame Street in general.
We also do Curious George and Dr. Seuss.
Luckily he's really not into any commericial stuff yet-but he is not exposed all that much. No TV unless it is a video that we watch with him.
That's it for us


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## ChampagneBlossom (Feb 5, 2009)

We don't do characters, not because of any moral objection to them, but because I think they kind of look tacky.







: We don't have a lot of money but I'd rather have a few wooden toys than plastic stuff with Dora plastered on them.

DS does have a sheet set with Cars on them, which he loves and asks for by name, but I hid that in the closet. I didn't have the heart to totally give it away because he does like it so much, but I'm saving it for a sick day or something, because it totally clashes with his room and it isn't even quality material so I'm sure the elastic will snap after a few washes.

I'm not against IMAGES, mind. We shop at the thrift store for most of his clothing and I try to stick to solid shirts or ones with cute logos on them. One of my favorites is a green shirt with a frog on it. And we have several doggy shirts (although I *think* one is a 101 dalmatian shirt, but he knows it as "puppy shirt") and a gorilla shirt and a truck shirt and fireman jammies. But they're not characters. The only exception is that he's in love with trains, and he saw a collection of shirts with Thomas on them that were just his size... So we got them... Now he has a meltdown in the morning if he doesn't get to wear his "train shirts." But the Thomas thing surprised me too. We saw a few episodes where it was, I guess the old version? The British one with slow animation and whatnot. It's pretty calm, even if it's a bit mean. I saw a set of DVD's sold on Craigslist, all Thomas, so I went and got it, and it had an American narrator and was fast paced and computer animated and I just got so confused, isn't Thomas Thomas? Oh well, whatever!

ETA: I love Disney, classic Disney. I wouldn't mind either of them watchings classic Disney, but the newer stuff or the computer animated films, or the sequels bug me. (I'll watch the original Winnie the Pooh but definitely not the new stuff they come out with for every holiday.) We have most of the classic feature length movies and will probably watch them when the kids have the attention span for them. Right now they get about 20 mins of TV a day, usually Thomas, and that's that. We're not really big on TV. We're DEFINITELY going to Dineyland one day though!


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## EdnaMarie (Sep 9, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ChampagneBlossom* 
We don't do characters, not because of any moral objection to them, but because I think they kind of look tacky.

I have to say that that is certainly part of why we don't go for a lot of serials as well. It's an aesthetic. But there are only so many books we can buy and read so filtering those out is not really depriving my daughter.

I have found she has really tacky taste so I'm sure she'll get to them as soon as she starts picking out more of her own books.

Quote:

It's unfortunate that the Beatrix Potter stuff has been licensed
Oh, SOB! Really? I didn't know. That's awful.









Aubergine- my daughter likes it. We don't mind hunting (we aren't vegetarians) and on the contrary I like that she will know where meat comes from. I have issues with the moral of the story- if you are rude, karma will come back to bite you in the booty- which is not really true in my experience, but she likes it.

She likes Miss Moppet best, though.


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## Aubergine68 (Jan 25, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *EdnaMarie* 
I

Aubergine- my daughter likes it. We don't mind hunting (we aren't vegetarians) and on the contrary I like that she will know where meat comes from. I have issues with the moral of the story- if you are rude, karma will come back to bite you in the booty- which is not really true in my experience, but she likes it.

She likes Miss Moppet best, though.

Dh comes from a family of hunters and competetive trap shooters and I from a family of farmers who all had their "gopher guns" locked up in the garage. It is not the hunting in the story so much as the irresponsible hunting. I mean, the man with the gun is clearly myopic -- mistaking a rabbit on a bench for a funny sort of bird....shouldn't be allowed to carry anything loaded









Working my way through Beatrix Potter right now with a couple of preschoolers and a couple of toddlers enjoying it...biggest surprise was how the two-year-olds took to the Tailor of Gloucester, which I consider a longish and rather dated book for little ones.

The Tale of Two Bad Mice and the Flopsy Bunnies are my personal faves to read with the children. Miss Moppet is a sweet one, too.


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## Marylizah (Jun 17, 2005)

My main beef with books are the books that have no plot / are badly written / feature licensed characters. So I won't buy

--Dora
--Any Disney books (he once received a Peter Pan book and the story was so truncated that it basically made absolutely no sense)
--Baby Einstein books (he got one-- from the same person who gave him Peter Pan, lol, and IT MADE NO SENSE)
--Corduroy / Spot / Clifford -- they are soooo boring

My librarian friend once told me that she never buys books from the bottom shelves in the kid's section at bookstores, or books that are pink and have sparkles on them, lol. I should add to that, books that you find at places like Marshall's and Tuesday Morning, that are plotless, with dull illustrations, etc. He got a TON of those for his birthday last year. I kept them, as they were given by a dear friend, but they are so dull. I'll take a little spice ("hate" or "stupid") over mind-numbing boredom any day.

Basically, if it doesn't tell an interesting story through words or pictures, I don't want it in my house, since I'm still the one who has to read them! And sadly, there's a lot of worthless stuff out there.


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## EdnaMarie (Sep 9, 2006)

Quote:

. I mean, the man with the gun is clearly myopic -- mistaking a rabbit on a bench for a funny sort of bird....shouldn't be allowed to carry anything loaded










True enough...


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## ChampagneBlossom (Feb 5, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *EdnaMarie* 
I have found she has really tacky taste so I'm sure she'll get to them as soon as she starts picking out more of her own books.

Our rule for the moment is any book can come home from the library, but the few books we DO buy must meet mommy-standards.








We don't venture into book stores together, period. Books come from the library and the books we own show up at holidays and birthdays and they come from the magical land of Amazon. I'm sure this will change as they grow more independent, but hopefully by then they won't be interested in Dora novels or whatever. If they *are*... well, I'm probably not going to say no outright, but I would try to steer them in a better direction.


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## tbone_kneegrabber (Oct 16, 2007)

sports. no books about sports, no clothes with sports stuff on them etc

licensed characters, no books, clothes etc

transportation, I avoid books specifically about "things that go!" or clothes with "vehicles" on them


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## Areia (Mar 5, 2009)

We try avoid most commercial stuff although she loves Curious George and Arthur (she's allowed a 15 min video every day) so we have a couple of their videos and she has some George books and decals in her room. She's really not into the whole "X has this and I want it too" thing yet (although that might change when she goes into preschool next year). She's really into flap and pop up books so we have lots of those. My favorite to read to her is All I see is part of me and I like Ellen Jackon's Equinox/Solstice books.

I have to say I dislike the Rainbow Fish and got rid of it. I know some people think its a great sharing book, but I felt it sent the message that you can only have friends if you "buy" them. Obviously, I want her to grow into a kind and generous person, but this rubbed me the wrong way. I heard it was originally a German book so maybe something was lost in translation.


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## ChampagneBlossom (Feb 5, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *tbone_kneegrabber* 
sports. no books about sports, no clothes with sports stuff on them etc

licensed characters, no books, clothes etc

transportation, I avoid books specifically about "things that go!" or clothes with "vehicles" on them

I find it interesting that you don't do sports or vehicles. I'm not a big fan of sports images either, but what is your reasoning behind banning them outright? Aesthetic or something more?







Also, vehicles... I would much rather DS was obsessed with, say, horses. (They're transportation too, right?







) But he loves transportation books and images. In fact, if we read a book together, he will mostly ignore everything except for the little car on the background of the page, etc. Why do you outlaw transportation stuff? I'm not a fan of them either, btw.


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## tbone_kneegrabber (Oct 16, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ChampagneBlossom* 
I find it interesting that you don't do sports or vehicles. I'm not a big fan of sports images either, but what is your reasoning behind banning them outright? Aesthetic or something more?







Also, vehicles... I would much rather DS was obsessed with, say, horses. (They're transportation too, right?







) But he loves transportation books and images. In fact, if we read a book together, he will mostly ignore everything except for the little car on the background of the page, etc. Why do you outlaw transportation stuff? I'm not a fan of them either, btw.









I do not like sports, neither does dp. Being uncoordinated and bullied by "jocks" has fueled this dislike







But more importantly I feel that they are HUGELY pushed on boy children. The same with "transportation." Right now ds is not that interested in those things, and I don't want to "spark" that particular interest. From the day they are born children are being indoctrinated with certain images. I try to avoid the major ones. If ds decides to love sports when he is older, fine I can deal with that, but I will not encourage it before he shows an interest.

If we have a book that has "vehicles" in it, I'll read it. I really don't mind so much in books, and he has a wooden plane and some trains toys too, i think playing with something and being an active participant is fine, but just being exposed to images over and over again in a passive way, clothing, some kinds of books, marketing, tv etc . Its the clothes that bug me. Its hard to find a pair of overalls without a truck on them, ya know?

More than books, I am concerned with clothes, almost all of ds clothes come from thrift stores and hand me downs, and we "edit" out certain things. I feel like dressing him in a car shirt from 0-3 months on, might make him interested in cars, where if I avoid the car shirt and he shows an interest later, I don't feel like it was foisted upon him my children's clothing manufacturers.

Now that he has shown an interest in bugs, fish, butterflies and cats I will happily pick him up clothes with those images. But I try to let him find his own interests


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## lanamommyphd07 (Feb 14, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *St. Margaret* 

Lana, why do you avoid first person books?


books "targeted" to a two-year-old, or up to about Kindy really, need to stay away from first person stories (me my I) because frankly most kids can't mind-bend to understand the other perspective. If I saw that kind of writing in a board book or that sort I pretty automatically discount it since no good editor or child development type would let that out. Clifford is typically an offender but only starts out that way--dr. seuss (I do not like green eggs and ham, etc) is okay first person usage since it's actually two guys talking to each other but the quotes are missing.

It really just boils down to bad writing, and if that's in there, what on earth else might be?


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## sparklett (Nov 25, 2006)

This is a REALLY great thread. Within my circles of friends and family IRL I am the most conservative about this, and it's often difficult to defend my choices.

The plan was not to have DS watch any television until age two. We made it to 21 months. DS is now allowed to watch Clifford and Big, Big World- that's it. The rule is no more than 30 minutes every other day. DS also likes to watch the opening credits of Northern Exposure reruns. He loves the moose.









We don't do any other branded characters: no Wiggles, Yo Gabba Gabba, Backyardigans, etc. becuase all of seems to put marketing and consumerism first, before the best interests of the child. I can't help it- those shows make me want to retch. Sitting them in front of this kind of stuff diverts them from time that could be better spent learning how to imagine, draw, discover, etc. My son loves music, and I'd rather turn on a CD and sing dance with him instead of sit him in front of one of these shows.

We also do not purchase *most* licensed merchandise, the principal reason is that Disney, Nickelodeon etc. have yet to give me a check for turning my child into a walking billboard.

The caveat to this is that DH has BEGGED me to let DS have a few Star Wars and superhero t-shirts and action figures. I'm fine with that (I need to choose my battles







), especially becuase DH encourages DS to make up his own names and stories about the characters. But besides that, no other licensed charters are allowed.

Thanks to Elmo, I despise Sesame Street. The SS I watched when I was growing up was great and truly defined PBS. Once Elmo was launched, it becuase just as bad as the rest of the stuff out there.

We do have some Tonka trucks, Fisher Price, etc., but all of that was purchased buy family members. DS hardly plays with the stuff.

I also prohibit Leap Frog, Baby Einstein, any anything that claims to be "educational".









There's a new documentary out there called Consuming Kids. I hope to see it soon.


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## beachcomber (May 11, 2005)

Our house is Dora, Diego and Disney free. And Kai-Lan free.

I avoid princesses whenever possible but we do have one book I love: The Paper Bag Princess by Robert Munsch. Awesome book.

I also greatly dislike any gender stereotypical stuff like Max & Ruby, where Ruby is always doing really girly stuff. It's so annoying.

We do let her watch Sesame shows and she adores Elmo.

Really, when it comes to characters, books and TV, I look at what the messaging is and go from there. If the message being sent is a positive and healthy one, I'm okay with letting her have access to it. If it's all hype, stereotype or thinly-veiled marketing, then I tend to steer her away from it.


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## EdnaMarie (Sep 9, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ChampagneBlossom* 
Our rule for the moment is any book can come home from the library, but the few books we DO buy must meet mommy-standards.







We don't venture into book stores together, period. Books come from the library and the books we own show up at holidays and birthdays and they come from the magical land of Amazon. I'm sure this will change as they grow more independent, but hopefully by then they won't be interested in Dora novels or whatever. If they *are*... well, I'm probably not going to say no outright, but I would try to steer them in a better direction.

I would just be interested to know how that conversation goes. I certainly would not mind having my child dressed in tasteful clothing and reading well-written, tastefully illustrated books all the time, but I do find it difficult to explain to her why her choices are in poor taste. With really inappropriate clothes, I can tell her "No, you can't have it because it looks like underwear and we are buying regular clothes right now." I do let her have clothes that she picks out as long as they are what we need, though. So far, she has chosen a pink velour track suit with hearts all over it. STELLAR choice, I must say.

But for books- and this hasn't come up yet- how would I explain about, oh, say, the Dragon Tales book my mom brought home from the Goodwill? "Gee, dear, wouldn't you like something a little less commercial?" or "The vocabulary in that book is not as rich," or "That's not a book, that's an advertisement"?

I'm afraid that she would not really understand the implications of purchasing advertising for a few years, if not another decade... I see you don't go book shopping with yours, but if we want affordable books it is the Goodwill (the $5 shipping on e-bay pretty much makes it pointless as a book-buying saving option) and I rarely would get to go there without my children.

Just curious, not trying to suggest you are not doing the right thing, because as I said I will be in that position too and would rather like to have something to say besides "Because I said so" or something that is more or less equivalent to, "I don't like it," or "You may think it's interesting/beautiful/nice, but really it's not."

Quote:

the principal reason is that Disney, Nickelodeon etc. have yet to give me a check for turning my child into a walking billboard.
YESSS... that really sums it up perfectly. Where's my check?


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## missbuns (Oct 16, 2007)

before my child was born i disliked characters. once she got to be around 1.5 i noticed she had her own likes/dislikes. she really, really loves elmo & mickey mouse. if she loves princesses when she's 4 i won't be a problem. not on the list of things i worry about anymore!


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## missbuns (Oct 16, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *sparklett* 
Thanks to Elmo, I despise Sesame Street. The SS I watched when I was growing up was great and truly defined PBS. Once Elmo was launched, it becuase just as bad as the rest of the stuff out there.



why? i agree that chicken dance elmo and all those toys and things are silly and i would never buy them.

but elmo's world (the tv show)is pretty much the same as old school sesame street. to be honest it's even gentler and more appropriate for toddlers. i have the old school DVD sets and while they are awesome they have iffy moments (scary and just weird stuff for kids). i think elmo is more modern and improved. he also has a pretty good sense of humor.

i actually didn't like him either, but my daughter LOVES him. i think she has pretty good taste. she won't watch most kid's shows or cartoons.


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## NinaBruja (Jan 19, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *AndVeeGeeMakes3* 
Max and Ruby (pretty much for the same reason - I hate the way Ruby talks to Max!!!! And where the heck are their parents????!!!)

i dont ban max and ruby but whenever its on i cant help myself from having a running commentary on how ruby is such a fascist and max is just trying to be a little bunny. my oldest thinks my commentary is hilarious and sometimes joins in.

barney is outright banned. my oldest asked why and i told her straight out 'he is so annoying it makes my head explode' they havent been much interested in him after that.

i let them watch disney, they even got me into hannah montana









we watch barbie princess movies together because we both find them interesting. im pretty princess friendly. i wore tutus and tiaras in highschool though so...yeah...the last one we watched was about the faerie mariposa and she saved the prince's mother by going with her twin sisters on a dangerous mission. her sisters learned to not be so shallow and came back to help fight bugs off from the castle.

in books we avoid mentions of being bad, punishment of any kind, mean parents, racism, bottlefeeding(except the book we have about a single dad, we just pretend he is feeding her donated milk in a bottle), eating meat(mostly because my kids will stop mid book and start talking to each other about how gross that is. totally not my doing!) and helpless annoying females. helpless kids in books get annoying too. helpless anyone is banned i guess. oh and hospital/medicalized birth. i also make sure to address all cribs. and point out that you dont need cows milk or eggs to be healthy. ugh so many times that one has come up in cartoons, paid messages within shows no doubt.

calliou creeps me out and my oldest daughter used to watch it until she got offended at calliou being punished.

im also not a big fan of sesame street books or books that are trying to hard to be educational and just end up being boring... who wants a boring book, really?

books about characters are usually out but a few favourite characters are allowed.

the kids watch dora and though she usually annoys me my kids are sloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooowly learning spanish from her. and some episodes are even funny...
diego too, my kids like how he saves animals. animal rescue is absolutely something i want my kids to think is important.
and it has brought up learning questions such as 'do jaguars use echolocation?'


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## sparklett (Nov 25, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *missbuns* 
why? i agree that chicken dance elmo and all those toys and things are silly and i would never buy them.

but elmo's world (the tv show)is pretty much the same as old school sesame street. to be honest it's even gentler and more appropriate for toddlers. i have the old school DVD sets and while they are awesome they have iffy moments (scary and just weird stuff for kids). i think elmo is more modern and improved. he also has a pretty good sense of humor.

i actually didn't like him either, but my daughter LOVES him. i think she has pretty good taste. she won't watch most kid's shows or cartoons.

Every time I hear Elmo refer to himself in the third person (which is all the time), I can't help but grimace. Third-person referral isn't just a cute part of Elmo's "personality"; it's just another way of developing brand recognition in toddlers. If they hear his name often enough, they will eventually ask for him by name. Elmo was (and still is) simply a marketing tool developed for a specific niche audience.


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## Julia'sMom (Mar 12, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lanamommyphd07* 
dd's favorite books are "everyone poops" and "no david".

My dd loves "everyone poops" as well. However, I always have dh read it to her because that book and morning sickness do not get along.









I don't have set ban standards, but basically any book that is poorly written or illustrated only stays in our home shortly. I've actually found that I only like about 1/2 of the books in the library. Of course, part of this is due to some being too young for dd and others being too old.


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## kcstar (Mar 20, 2009)

I avoid most Baby Einstein and related "superbaby" training material.

We do do baby sign, as a communication tool, but for a long time that was us modeling it. We didn't get any videos until last weekend. I've heard good things about "Baby Signing Time" but haven't shelled out the money yet.

My MIL did buy us a couple of the Baby Einstein CD's, and they're on the playlist, but we don't listen to them much. We do regularly play with the Bay Einstein set-of-four foam blocks, he has a lot of blocks the same size.

We made it about 13-14 months without much TV or screentime, but I've started putting a Sesame Street.com playlist in the bedtime routine many days.

One thing to keep in mind is that when I was watching it, Sesame Street was aimed at the 4-6 year old age range. Around the 1990's, they discovered that their audience was more 2-3 years old, so they adjusted their focus accordingly. Hence, more Elmo, and simpler material. I watch it with him, and skip games or videos that seem over his head.

I have a couple of Dora & Diego books with CDs, also for the Spanish-learning, but we haven't gotten into the show. I tried looking them up on Youtube, but most of those were inappropriate mashups. There were a *few* things on the website that we watched once, but the episodes had way more advertising than I wanted. Since DH and I both studied Spanish in high school and college, we're more inclined to just pick up books in Spanish and read them to him ourselves.

No Barney, Backyardigans, etc. He does seem to like trains, so we'll probably get a few Thomas things in time.

I don't ban books, but I might censor them by omission. What he asks us to read are usually the ones we've read to him many times. If I don't read one to him, he doesn't usually ask for it. I think Clifford and Curious George are for an older child than him, so they don't get read much.


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## Liquesce (Nov 4, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *sparklett* 
We also do not purchase *most* licensed merchandise, the principal reason is that Disney, Nickelodeon etc. have yet to give me a check for turning my child into a walking billboard.

"We don't want to get sucked into buying the full line of branded products" I get. "We find them tacky and don't like them and don't like our child to like them" I get. Etc. But "walking billboard" ... my mom didn't get a check for her "yes we can!" t-shirt either, but she liked Obama so she wore it anyway. The Colorado tourist commission doesn't pay me for the Kokopeli Colorado shirt my sister gave me, but I love it and so I wear it. Kwim? Disney isn't paying me for my son's Winnie the Pooh pajamas, but they make him happy ... I don't really feel I'm missing out on compensation for that.


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## NinaBruja (Jan 19, 2004)

my kids have a few shirts tastefully done with a character or two on shirts. i pretty much view them like someone wearing a band shirt or something. my kid likes tinkerbell, she has tinkerbell on a shirt. i have a shirt with sally from nightmare before christmas on it.
i dont think theres anything wrong with wearing something on your shirt youre interested in.


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## peaceful_mama (May 27, 2005)

When DD was a baby I started to notice all the babies sleeping alone and censored our "library" accordingly









When I went looking for "New baby" books for DS and eventually DD, I censored out anything that did not at least show both breast and bottle feeding. We like the Dr. Sears books for kids. I also stuck to stuff this time that focused on the baby at home and avoided the whole "hospital" scene as I was planning NOT to go to the hospital.

Potty training books that just tell kids they should do it to be big are out!

I've gotten rid of a couple that referred to baby being "bad"

my kids as babies have really liked books with real photos of babies.









As far as TV nothing is truly banned. I tried for awhile, it just seemed to make them want it more. Now that I have lifted the Barney ban, he watched it a few times and I have never seen it again.

I simply do not answer requests given in a Callou (or more specifcally his baby sister Rosie) way from the 4 year old. (I used to threaten to ban him entirely until I realzed that would probably lead to a bigger fascination with trying to watch him....)

And I do not watch any sort of medicalized birth shows in front of my children. It started when I was pregnant with DD and thinking that I didn't want DS to think that's what was going to happen to me.
Now that I've had a home waterbirth (well semi-home, I went to a birth house over the border where it is legal--the kids were not there) I really do NOT want them to think "Medicalized"="Normal" birth!
especially DD, but I think it's important for the boys too. I would not have likely had a home waterbirth if DH didn't have a background in thinking out-of-hospital birth was "normal" birth.


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## Marylizah (Jun 17, 2005)

Re: Ruby and Max-- I've never seen the show, but the books are really great.

In fact, Rosemary Wells is one of my favorite children's authors. It sounds like the show is not good, that's such a shame. Max Cleans Up is one of DS' favorite books.


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## Thalia (Apr 9, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *BaBaBa* 
I avoid licensed or commercial characters unless they are originals (eg., Winnie the Pooh, Peter Rabbit)

I avoid what Charlotte Mason calls 'twaddle' which are books that speak down to children, don't engage their imagination or don't have a developed story line. We've received a few Sandra Boynton books. Ugh! Prime offender!

I love many of the Sandra Boynton board books for little ones. Especially the Going to Bed book and Green Hat/Blue Hat. DD adores them.


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## EdnaMarie (Sep 9, 2006)

My daughter loves SB books because she can memorize them and they actually have good rhythm (they remind me of Jazz Chants). They are definitely directed at babies / under-threes but they are fun for learning English.

Quote:

But elmo's world (the tv show)is pretty much the same as old school sesame street. to be honest it's even gentler and more appropriate for toddlers. i have the old school DVD sets and while they are awesome they have iffy moments (scary and just weird stuff for kids). i think elmo is more modern and improved. he also has a pretty good sense of humor.
I buy Sesame Street. It's an international non-profit and I like their work. There is no CEO getting rich off my purchases. I love the indigenous Sesame show movement. I learned Russian in part from Sesame Street Russia. My daughter also picked Elmo out from a hundred or so characters... if we all bought more Public Media merch., maybe they would lose their public sponsorships.

Elmo does not live in a mansion.


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## FoxintheSnow (May 11, 2004)

I really just avoid books that are annoying to read like Guess how much I love you. You can only say Nutbrown Hare so many times before going nuts.


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## missbuns (Oct 16, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *sparklett* 
Every time I hear Elmo refer to himself in the third person (which is all the time), I can't help but grimace. Third-person referral isn't just a cute part of Elmo's "personality"; it's just another way of developing brand recognition in toddlers. If they hear his name often enough, they will eventually ask for him by name. Elmo was (and still is) simply a marketing tool developed for a specific niche audience.

yes, he's a character that was developed for toddlers, and toddlers love him. most toddlers also refer to themselves in third person for a while. that's the reason why elmo does it. he's supposed to be 3 years old. when i see something my daughter enjoys so much it's hard for me to "hate" him.


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## Ammaarah (May 21, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Liquesce* 
None, really. That may make me the odd one out around here, but I have yet to personally encounter a children's book/theme/character that I thought was going to negatively impact my children. I suppose if there were Bratz board books or something I might redirect my kids away from them. Bunny books and such don't offend me though.

I agree! I love about 3/4 of the books people say they hate in this thread. And oh my goodness, Sandra Boynton so does not talk down to young readers! There is a lot of funny subtext in her pictures and kids love to figure out the stories behind the stories. Yeah, the language is not complex but they're books for toddlers.


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## Snuzzmom (Feb 6, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Jokerama* 
You can only say Nutbrown Hare so many times before going nuts.

HA! Yes, actually, I have to say I agree.







NUTBROWN HARE!


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## kmeyrick (Aug 30, 2006)

I get that some characters and brands are really, really annoying. But first memories of books should be gloriously, ridiculously happy. So whatever book a child is enamored with I would check out!

And I love Eric Carle! His paintings are _supposed_ to have the spirit of a child. Not a stiff, school marm illustration of Dick and Jane. Bleh. To a kid his illustrations are magical. And isn't that the point?


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## Liquesce (Nov 4, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *kmeyrick* 
And I love Eric Carle! His paintings are _supposed_ to have the spirit of a child. Not a stiff, school marm illustration of Dick and Jane. Bleh. To a kid his illustrations are magical. And isn't that the point?

My son doesn't yet seem to really care for them, but that's rather the point, isn't it ... they're not _his_ style, regardless of whether or not they are mine. (Which they're not ... welcome to happy coincidence land.)

Honestly, in the coming years if what my kids want is for us all to sit down and read the Sweet Valley Twins or something every night, that's what we'll be doing. They're insipid and irritating and are likely to make my eyes roll up into the back of my head, but if it's what they're into .... a youthful love of books = good, period, you know?


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## ChampagneBlossom (Feb 5, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *missbuns* 
when i see something my daughter enjoys so much it's hard for me to "hate" him.

This, except with Thomas.


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## luv_my_babes (Dec 8, 2008)

Neither of my children watch tv during the week, however we do have a 'movie night' every Friday night. Usually we'll watch something that I have picked out - The Black Stallion, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (the original), Black Beauty just to name a few. Both ds and dd loved these movies.

There are several things that are outright banned from our housing including, Ninja Turtles, Pokemon, Spiderman, Batman. Why does it seem that every child that ds goes to school with is obsessed with these characters?







: I find them so violent and distasteful.

We avoid most Disney movies like the plague, I can't stand character clothing and most of the toys we own are not licenced character toys. We do have a few, but most of those were given to the children as presents and are rarely used.

As for books... hmmm.. most of our books are nature books. I am pretty leniant about books - as long as they are well written and don't portray any violent/aggressive/sexual/gender stereotype undertones then its ok.


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