# My 2.5 year old won't stop slamming the microwave door.



## Dillpicklechip (Nov 10, 2006)

My 2.5 year old son really likes and needs a lot of attention from me. I do all I can to spend time with him--reading, taking him to the park, playing, etc., but obviously I have other responsibilities, and when I try to get something done that doesn't have to do with him he very often does something he knows I don't like, just to get attention.

For example, every evening when I am in the kitchen making supper, ds will come in, look at me with a grin, open the microwave door and slam it. I will say "No, please don't touch the microwave," and he'll look right at me and do it again. I'll get down on the floor, look right at him, and say "Please do not touch the microwave door. You can hurt it doing that." Then I'll go back to what I'm doing and he'll giggle and slam it again. I can feel the door getting looser and I know he's going to break it with the constant slamming.

He absolutely knows he shouldn't do it, because sometimes he says "Don't touch the microwave!" before I even get a chance.

Usually I try to show him the natural consequences of his actions--for example, I am a wahm and when I'm working on the computer, he tries to get my attention by hitting me or even biting me--when he does this I will not let him sit on my lap which upsets him. But how can I stop him from doing things (like slamming the microwave door) which don't have clear consequences?

The other thing I try to do with him is simply remove the temptation if he keeps getting into something, but obviously I can't move the microwave and I don't see how I can keep him out of the kitchen when I am in there.

Does anyone have any advice for me? I really feel like I need to get some concrete GD ideas to implement. My dh wants to spank ds when he misbehaves, and I don't want this to happen! I need to get some better ideas.

Thanks.


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## melissel (Jun 30, 2004)

Appliance lock? We have one that's just heavy duty velcro for the fridge, works great.

I know others will have better advice, but that's the first thing that comes to my mind. I avoid all power struggles if possible, and then negotiate the rest


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## lolar2 (Nov 8, 2005)

Is the microwave built in? Are you sure you can't move it?


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## Dillpicklechip (Nov 10, 2006)

An appliance lock is an interesting idea. I didn't know such a thing existed.

No, the microwave is not built it, but there is no where I could put it where it would be out of his reach. Our kitchen is fairly small.


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## Slabobbin (Jan 29, 2004)

Microwaves are bad for you, I would just get rid of it.







But since I know that if you have one you probably agree with them, I'll try to give some more practical advice.









I agree with the appliance lock. Also, what about letting him "help" with supper or having special toys that he only gets to play with when you are in the kitchen?


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## Dillpicklechip (Nov 10, 2006)

LOL, don't worry I don't use the microwave for cooking, I just use it for reheating leftovers, thawing a few slices of frozen bread, and softening butter. But even though I don't use it much I don't want to get rid of it, because there are times when I'm in a rush and it's really handy!









Thank you for the idea of letting him "help" with supper. I think he would love that. I'll have to think of some ways to let him "help." He just wants to be with me and be a part of what I'm doing. Maybe even letting him stand on a stool and watch me prepare the food would work too. He always seems curious about what I'm doing.


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## moondiapers (Apr 14, 2002)

How about physically removing him from the microwave? And setting him up with something else to do?


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## Slabobbin (Jan 29, 2004)

I'll be honest, I don't usually have the patience for "help". But my mom cooks down at my house a lot and she would let my son "help" at that age.

For example, if she was peeling potatoes she would put the peelings in a big bowl for him and he would add water and stir it and he thought he was cooking with her.

Something else he did at that age was to take all of the utensils out of my caddy and "cook like a Japanese" (which was his two year old way of saying that he was cooking like the cooks at the Japanese restaurant that had a Hibachi grill







).

IMO that age is a little young to actually and truely "help" (I think four or five is a more appropriate age for that) but there are lots of pretend things he could do to keep him busy.

He may get messy so I'd just strip him down, give him a big bowl and spoon, throw some scraps in the bowl and let him go at it.


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## huggerwocky (Jun 21, 2004)

Tape the microwave?

At 2.5 they don't really have the impulse control to NOT go and touch it.


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## melissel (Jun 30, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Slabobbin* 
I'll be honest, I don't usually have the patience for "help". But my mom cooks down at my house a lot and she would let my son "help" at that age.

Oh, thank goodness I'm not the only one







I'm terrible about that. My toddler is always so interested in what I'm doing but inevitably starts grabbing at things on the stove or flinging food out of bowls or spilling things. I tried again tonight and it resulted in little bits of canned salmon all over the kitchen and water spilled into the stovetop







:

Depending on your DS, if you're looking for something to keep him busy, my DDs (both of them







) love to play with dry noodles. They have about a box and a half of dry elbow noodles that I keep just for playing. I give them my cake and muffin pans, a play bowl or two, and various scoops/cups/spoons. I only whip the whole shebang out when I'm really desperate, so it retains some novelty. I asked my toddler tonight if she wanted to play with her noodles, and she actually jumped up and down with glee







The rule is the noodles MUST stay in the kitchen. She's pretty careful with them, because she knows that if she's not, she won't get to play with them anymore.

As for appliance locks, you can google appliance locks or appliance latches and you'll get lots of hits. I can't find the velcro ones anymore, I don't know why. They're perfect! But there are lots of other kinds--or, you could just go to a craft store and buy a big section of self-adhesive hook-and-loop and stick it on. Mine's been on my fridge for the past four years


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## ShaggyDaddy (Jul 5, 2006)

In my opinion the microwave is the problem not DS. move it! Toddlers don't really have well developed impulse control, so control the situation not the baby









for what it's worth the only way my 2 year old can shut the microwave is to slam it, and he helps me cook snacks for him by shutting the microwave door and pushing the buttons that I designate after I put the food in.


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## LoveBeads (Jul 8, 2002)

Two words: duct tape.

Around his wrists so he can't touch the microwave...










You know I'm kidding, right?

In all seriousness, I used velcro strips for my DD at that age to close off dresser drawers, etc. It worked very well. So well that sometimes even I couldn't open a drawer!


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## ShadowMom (Jun 25, 2004)

In that situation I would probably just move the microwave somewhere else.

DS would slam the microwave door when he was little. It wasn't intentional. But I like to act as if things are unintentional even if I don't think they are - sort of giving the benefit of the doubt, yk? Also defuses things a bit if it's a power struggle. So when he slammed it, I would say, "Don't forget to shut the door easily, OK?" And then after that it got abbreviated to "Easy, easy!" said with a smile.

I think if you allowed him to open and close the microwave door, and gently reminded him to close it gently/easily, it might lose its appeal.







Your DS might be different from mine, though.

Also, I wanted to mention - my DS had a hard time with slamming the microwave door because you have to slam most of them to get them shut. He was just imitating what he saw, only harder. So that might play into why he is specifically slamming it, too.


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