# Toddler too excited to sleep? HELP!



## NoliMum (Jan 18, 2007)

<----- This is my daughter at bedtime. She's driving me nuts. Right now she's sitting on my lap, talking to the computer as I type, at 11 pm!

We have implemented a bedtime routine- bath at 8, change, lotion, story, nurse to sleep by 9. But each night she's gotten it pushed later and later because when we go to nurse she isn't sleepy at all. She just ends up biting me and laughing, then sitting up to play.

Her mornings aren't late, and her naps don't seem to make a difference.

I've tried lavender incense and teething tablets and massage and ignoring her and playing with her and rocking and bouncing.... Every time I offer the breast, she takes a few sucks and then bites. nothing is getting her to calm down!!

Help me! I want to go to bed.


----------



## BellinghamCrunchie (Sep 7, 2005)

DD went through phases like that, especially when she was moving from two naps to one nap. Once she settled into one nap her bedtime went back to 8:30-9pm. Right now she is getting close to giving up the last nap, so bedtime is back to 10:30pm - 11pm, which I hate, but I don't think there is anything I can really do until she drops the nap. She's just not sleepy at 9pm any more.

How much sleep is your DD getting daily and is she taking one nap or two?


----------



## NoliMum (Jan 18, 2007)

Oh no, I need her to take two naps! How will I ever get anything done?!









She normally sleeps 10-12 hours a night (with nursings throughout) and has a morning and an afternoon nap, between 30-60 minutes each.

Today she only took the afternoon nap, and was grumpy all day until then.

Do tots usually transition to just having one at a year old? She'll be a year next Friday.


----------



## BellinghamCrunchie (Sep 7, 2005)

DD was around 14 mths when she went to one nap.

It sounds like your DD is getting enough sleep at night but her naps seem short. I wonder if she is napping just enough to take the edge off and its pushing the bedtime back. DD's one nap lasts for 2-3 hours, which is more than your DD's combined. I wonder if there is anyway to encourage her to take a longer nap? It might seem backwards, but good naps actually lead to better nighttime sleep.


----------



## katybeth (Sep 2, 2004)

I agree with the previous poster about having your daughter take one longer nap. If she doesn't seem ready for one nap, try to lengthen her current naps by catching her before she's fully awake and nursing her back to sleep. My DS will still wake up mid-nap, generally after about an hour, but sometimes after as little as a half hour, but I'll nurse him back down as soon as he wakes and he will often finish the nap. I'll even hold him occasionally for the second half of the nap if he won't allow me to lay him back down without waking--it's that important. The nap really does help with nighttime sleep.

The other thing is--and my DH totally doesn't believe me about this--I think there's a window in the evening during which my DS will fall asleep fairly easily. If I miss the window, he's too worked up to sleep and stays awake until 10:00ish. (And the window always seems to be a little earlier than I'm prepared for.) They say that 7:30 is the ideal bedtime. My DS seems to prefer about 8:15. If you watch your daughter carefully starting around 7:00 for signs of tiredness like yawning, looking glazed, or just slowing down, you can start her bedtime routine--you have to make it quick once she's exhibiting signs of tiredness--and get her down before she gets her second wind, so to speak. The other thing you can do to determine when her ideal bedtime is is count about 11 hours backwards from the time she wakes up, and start to attempt to put her to sleep at that time. Hope this helps a bit.


----------



## NoliMum (Jan 18, 2007)

Those suggestions really do make sense, and help! I didn't know her naps were "short" in comparison with other kids- I always thought an hour long nap was nice and long!

If I nap with her, she'll sleep for 2 or more hours, sometimes without even nursing. I wonder if she just inherently _knows_ I'm next to her in her sleep. But I need her naptimes to be productive; I can't just sleep the day away with her.

Last night she didn't get to sleep until around 12-12:30. Then she awoke at 3:45 with what seemed to be a stomach ache. Nursing, icies for teething, and food all failed at consoling her. I bicycled her legs a little bit and walked and rocked her with the sling, and she finally fell off into a sensitive sleep. I think it was the garlicky pizza I had at dinner.

It seems like each day brings a new hinderance to her sleep! When will we ever have a smooth routine?







:


----------



## katybeth (Sep 2, 2004)

This page includes a chart with the approximate length and quantity of naps babies need based on age. I kind of just try to aim in that range, like I said, putting him back to sleep immediately if he wakes up too early.

As for getting stuff done while your little one is napping, I just try to pack everything in the beginning of the nap, when DS will almost always stay asleep for at least 30 minutes. The second half of the nap is sometimes restless, so if you plan your chores or whatever for the first half of the nap and expect to lay down or hold your babe for the second half of her nap, it'll just be a bonus when you don't have to lay down with her.


----------



## claras_mom (Apr 25, 2006)

Dh swears by turning off all the lights. When dd is bouncing off the walls at bedtime--basically doing things to keep herself awake; won't settle down to nurse or read etc.--we finish the story and then turn off everything, including shutting the door into the bathroom (which has a dim nightlight). She usually settles pretty quickly when there's no stimulation.

I do remember going through a period with dd when she was about your daughter's age...and a pretty new walker?...when it was harder to get her to go down. I've read that sleep disturbances and changes are common around times of great developmental change.


----------



## DollyX (Jan 29, 2007)

my 16 m-o has been going thru some strange sleeping things, this discussion is very helpful for me to read! from the beginning, she has gone to sleep late (around 10- 10:30pm )and awoken late. Nowadays she wakes up at 9am but she used to wake up at 10 or 10:30am. She sleeps through the entire night 99% of the time. She still takes two naps, one an hour on average, the other usually 2 hours or more. it's not a major problem or anything, but i'm wondering if others experience it too...i feel like a freak when i tell other parents! it's like all babies are supposed to go to bed and wake up at the same time...she's getting enough sleep overall...another mom told me that i was doing things wrong, and that some doctor who wrote some book said so...yeah...thanks. (needless to say we aren't chatting anymore!) Anyone else go through this??? i've NEVER been a morning person, so i think maybe my baby isn't one either??? could this be? (my husband is a morning person, tho!)


----------



## katybeth (Sep 2, 2004)

IMO, ultimately, as long as your toddler is getting the requisite 13ish hours of sleep per day (and it sounds like yours is, Dolly), it doesn't really matter what time the sleeping begins and ends if it works for everyone in your family.


----------



## mraven721 (Mar 10, 2004)

_moving to FBNP_


----------



## NoliMum (Jan 18, 2007)

Ok, now everything's totally screwed up.







:

Last night Noli went to sleep around 8:30 or so, but woke up around 10 and was up until 1:30.

Tonight she went to sleep around 8, and slept until 1:30, and now she's up and playing. She only had one nap today that was less than an hour long.

I am sooooo tired.







Help me!

(I tried putting her in the crib to play so I could sleep on the floor next to it, but she just whined until I let her out, then tried to climb all over me. So now I'm at the computer- the only thing that'll keep me awake and pass the time- while she plays on the floor.)


----------



## StrawberryFields (Apr 6, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *NoliMum* 
Do tots usually transition to just having one at a year old? She'll be a year next Friday.









My ds was grumpy during the transition but he transitioned from 2 30-45 minute naps to one 2 hour nap when he was just shy of a year. Now he reliably sleeps for two solid hours after he's been up for 3, so usually around 10:30 or 11 AM. At the same time, his bedtime started moving up and now it's about 8:30.


----------



## StrawberryFields (Apr 6, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *NoliMum* 
Tonight she went to sleep around 8, and slept until 1:30, and now she's up and playing. She only had one nap today that was less than an hour long.

I am sooooo tired.







Help me!

(I tried putting her in the crib to play so I could sleep on the floor next to it, but she just whined until I let her out, then tried to climb all over me. So now I'm at the computer- the only thing that'll keep me awake and pass the time- while she plays on the floor.)

Personally, if my ds wakes up in the middle of the night he can nurse if he wants but we do not get out of bed, ever, until 6AM. Once or twice I let 5:30 slide but I try not to make that a habit. He may toss and turn and climb on me and protest but I just pick him up, lay him back down, and don't say anything other than "night-night." I'll rub his back and snuggle and pat his bum. I do NOT want him to think that if he gets up in the middle of the night and if he pushes hard enough, we will get up. He is a TOUGH baby to get to sleep (he'll gag himself, poke himself in the eyes, anything it takes when he's falling asleep and wants to stay up!) so we need to be really firm with him that the hours between midnight-ish and 6 are for sleeping.


----------



## NoliMum (Jan 18, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *StrawberryFields* 
Personally, if my ds wakes up in the middle of the night he can nurse if he wants but we do not get out of bed, ever, until 6AM. Once or twice I let 5:30 slide but I try not to make that a habit. He may toss and turn and climb on me and protest but I just pick him up, lay him back down, and don't say anything other than "night-night." I'll rub his back and snuggle and pat his bum. I do NOT want him to think that if he gets up in the middle of the night and if he pushes hard enough, we will get up. He is a TOUGH baby to get to sleep (he'll gag himself, poke himself in the eyes, anything it takes when he's falling asleep and wants to stay up!) so we need to be really firm with him that the hours between midnight-ish and 6 are for sleeping.

How do you keep him from climbing over you and off the bed? When she wakes in the middle of the night, I'm so afraid I'll doze off and she'll just end up on her head on the floor. A few times I've woken up to her sitting next to me, grinning.

Also, my fiance has to be up for work at 5:30, so having a hyper baby climbing on him in the middle of the night can cause him to lose too much valuable rest.

Today we woke up late, almost at noon! I know this is bad, but I was just so tired... she has napped for 15 minutes at the most all day, and is still up and running at 11:04. :yawning:


----------



## CalebsMama05 (Nov 26, 2005)

lemme know if you can get your dd to sleep earlier.my ds is almost 8m and he goes to bed around 2-3am.


----------



## StrawberryFields (Apr 6, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *NoliMum* 
How do you keep him from climbing over you and off the bed? When she wakes in the middle of the night, I'm so afraid I'll doze off and she'll just end up on her head on the floor. A few times I've woken up to her sitting next to me, grinning.

Also, my fiance has to be up for work at 5:30, so having a hyper baby climbing on him in the middle of the night can cause him to lose too much valuable rest.

Today we woke up late, almost at noon! I know this is bad, but I was just so tired... she has napped for 15 minutes at the most all day, and is still up and running at 11:04. :yawning:

Well a few things. First, does she know how to climb off the bed on her own? I taught ds from early on how to turn around and climb off the bed so I'm not worried about him falling out. If he's awake, he knows how to get down. Second, the bed is against the wall so I can put ds by the wall, then me, then dh, and I don't think that he could climb over both of us without someone noticing. Also, if I lay him between us and I lay by the wall, he's more likely to climb all over me than dh so he'd be crawling toward the wall rather than toward the edge of the bed.

What generally happens is after a few times of me laying him back down he gives up and stays laying down. He tosses and turns while I doze and eventually we all fall asleep.

We've been doing the no-getting-out-of-bed thing since birth and we don't have any middle of the night wakeups where ds wants to get out of bed anymore, really, but we still do this when no amount of rocking or singing or nursing will get him to sleep and we are all exhausted. My dh also gets up at 5:30 am and I get up at 6:15 to watch my niece so 3 AM bedtime with 2 nightwakings doesn't cut it here.


----------



## NoliMum (Jan 18, 2007)

How old was he when you taught him to climb off the bed? How did you do it?

Luckily today we woke up at 10 and at 12:30, she's taking a nap. That was her routine before this whole mess began, so things are looking up!


----------



## WeasleyMum (Feb 27, 2007)

I don't know if this will be any help to you, but have you tried making bed time start earlier? Like maybe getting started at 7 instead of 8? I've heard that helps for some. This book, Sleepless in America, has some interesting information on childhood sleep patterns: there's a thread on it here.


----------



## StrawberryFields (Apr 6, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *NoliMum* 
How old was he when you taught him to climb off the bed? How did you do it?

Luckily today we woke up at 10 and at 12:30, she's taking a nap. That was her routine before this whole mess began, so things are looking up!

I don't remember exactly but it was before he turned 1. By the time he was 1 I know that I was leaving him on the bed/couch/chairs/etc without being afraid he'd fall off.

I would take him on the bed or couch and make it a game. If he crawled to the edge and looked over I would turn him around singing, "Feet first! Feet first!" and I would dangle his feet off the edge and hold on to him as he slid down the side and touched his feet to the floor. One day a lightbulb went off and he realized that was how to get down and he's had no trouble since.


----------



## NoliMum (Jan 18, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *StrawberryFields* 
I don't remember exactly but it was before he turned 1. By the time he was 1 I know that I was leaving him on the bed/couch/chairs/etc without being afraid he'd fall off.

I would take him on the bed or couch and make it a game. If he crawled to the edge and looked over I would turn him around singing, "Feet first! Feet first!" and I would dangle his feet off the edge and hold on to him as he slid down the side and touched his feet to the floor. One day a lightbulb went off and he realized that was how to get down and he's had no trouble since.

Sorry, I didn't sub this thread so I forgot to check it for awhile...

Update: One morning she woke up at 6, took one long nap, and went to sleep around 8, and I think that reset everything. We kept trying to stick with that, and even though it's varied a bit day by day, she has been getting to sleep by 10:30 pm pretty regularly for the past week and a half.

I've been trying to slide her down feet first lately, so I guess I am on the right path. She just turned a year, so hopefully she's at the right developmental stage to catch on.

Thanks for all the advice!


----------

