# Parents of late-talkers - let's talk!



## mamandedeux (Jan 15, 2010)

I keep seeing threads pop up about toddlers not talking, so I was hoping we could ''consolidate'' some info in this thread here. It was actually a thread here that made me question my own child's speech, and we recently got an evaluation. He was tested at 20 months, and scored at the 12-month level in expressive, and 30-month level in receptive. The SLP didn't feel there was anything ''wrong'' with him, but he still hasn't gained any new words in the last two months. I thought maybe we could share what others are doing to help speech along, and what the results have been.

Here's what the SLP suggested doing:

-repeat every word many times over, and focus only on one word at a time (e.g.: You want to go DOWN? Down? Down. Down. Go down. Let's go DOWN.) until he repeats it, then offer praise.

-encourage gestures and signs, but don't allow child to communicate solely with them. For eg., if DS signs more, I'm supposed to get him to attempt to say it before I accept it.

-withold some things until DS makes an attempt at vocalizing. So even though he signs truck, makes a driving gesture, pushes me to the shelf, I'm not supposed to let him have it until he attempts to vocalize.

None of the above is really working. Because he understands so much, he looks at me like I'm dumb when I repeat myself and he just says yes (Me: Down? DS: Yes. Me: Down, Down, we go down. DS: yes, Yeeeeessssss!!!!!!).

He has about 20 signs, and will NOT attempt to say words at all when signing. He gets mad if I try to push him, like he knows I understand, so I should comply.

I am very uncomfortable withholding things, so I haven't pursued that very much. The SLP said to not do it with food or cuddles (thank goodness!), but still...

Anyway, any thoughts would be welcome.

DS is 22 months today and has about 15 words. He's also very social and babbles constantly, just not coherently. He also has some inner ear fluid (failed tympanogram - type B), but passed the hearing test. He has no other issues that could suggest apraxia or autism, although I don't want to rule those out solely based on one SLP's assessment.

TIA!


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## fizgig (Aug 3, 2007)

Our son is a late talker though he also has a receptive delay which makes therapy very different. We've been trying to understand what is going on with him forever now (he is 30 months and at about 14 months receptive and expressive). Like you son, we are pretty certain our DS isn't on the spectrum which has actually made it a challenge to get good info since so much of the therapy out there is geared towards kids on the spectrum.

I will say that I've done about a million tons of research and the kind of "withholding" therapy that calls for ignoring other forms of communication from your child can hurt more than help in some cases. My own gut reaction to the Speech Therapist that suggested withholding was like yours. I was suspicious and so I looked further into it. According to my research, what you are talking about can work for kids who don't have the "will" to communicate (very withdrawn or those on the spectrum who don't make the effort). However (!!!) it can actually hurt kids who are already trying to communicate - especially if you can clearly understand what he is signing, etc.

The theory being that what you are teaching him is that his attempts to communicate are not being heeded which might actually just cause him to communicate less in general. The opposite of what you want! I highly recommend a book called Play To Talk by Jim McDonald - it has opened up a whole new level of communication with our son. It is all about recasting, talking at their level, fostering a sense of back and forth interaction. We found a new therapist who works with me and doesn't believe in withholding (she is actually training me in what is called the Hanen method which helps ME become the main therapist for our DS.)

There aren't very many resources for late talkers who are not on the spectrum but there is a group (Natural Late Talkers) that has been really helpful for us as we try to work help our DS talk more. Hope that helps! I would love to hear more from other late-talker parents


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## APToddlerMama (Oct 5, 2009)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *mamandedeux*
> 
> DS is 22 months today and has about 15 words. He's also very social and babbles constantly, just not coherently. He also has some inner ear fluid (failed tympanogram - type B), but passed the hearing test. He has no other issues that could suggest apraxia or autism, although I don't want to rule those out solely based on one SLP's assessment.


My son has a speech delay as well and I used to work in EI too. There is no way in a million years I would do what your SLP is suggesting in terms of withholding things. I think that sounds super old school and cruel. I would listen to your gut and do what you feel comfortable with. If you feel like you can encourage him to vocalize without ignoring him or putting too much pressure on him and frustrating him, I might try that a bit, but not refusing him things if he won't vocalize.

Have you seen an ENT? Fluid in the inner ear is a really common cause of speech delays. Several kids I had on my caseload had tubes placed in their ears and their speech really took off. The fluid can make things sound like the kids are listening to speech under water which will obviously impact what they learn to say. If you haven't yet seen an ENT, I would do that for sure. It can be such an easy solution. Good luck mama!


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## mommy212 (Mar 2, 2010)

Subbing- 22 months DS has 10-15 words, but is very good at understanding . He has never been evaluated or anything. He mimics words a lot lately but doesn't remember them or use them later.


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## petriescz (Jul 15, 2011)

Great idea for a thread! My son is 33 months currently. He is receiving speech and OT once a week from early intervention and speech twice a week from a private speech therapist. His diagnosis is motor speech disorder, dysarthria(weakness) and possibly apraxia. His receptive language is above average, his exspresive. Is right about average but his intelligibility is the 3 rd percentile. He talks in sentences and has a good vocab but is extremely difficult to understand.

At 15 months he had 3 words. He nevere babbled. At 18 months he had about 10 words and a few 2 word phrases like, "i did it". At 24 months he had about 30 words and some 2 word phrases. He started speech at 27 months against the advice of our pediatrician. I decided why should we wait when i knew something was wrong. He is now talkling up a storm and therapy has been very good.

On the other hand my 4.5 year old son had the exact same development until 22 months. No babbling, little words etc... Bt then started talking in clear sentences and never stopped.

It's so hard to know if they are just late tallkers or if something else is going on. It can't hurt at all to get an evaluation from early intervention or a private slp.


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## Peony (Nov 27, 2003)

So glad to see some others. DS1 is 2y4m, has been in weekly speech therapy through EI since 19 months. At this point he still only has 25 words or so, 3 signs, he does try to mimic others at times. He has some other things that make me wonder about him, he tends to live in his own world, we don't always know how much he understands but yet when he wants to, he will fully engage strangers and be this friendly little boy. Other days, he will wander around the house not making a sound for 5 hours.







EI doesn't say much other then he is making great progress.

We just today got into a private SLP for her to do an eval. Perfect timing because our EI therapist was injured this week and is unable to work for a while, they have no back up therapist and have no idea when his services will be able to resume.


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## mamandedeux (Jan 15, 2010)

Thanks for sharing, mamas. It is good to hear that progress does come. Although I don't feel his lack of speech is holding my DS back at all, my biggest fear is that he'll realize at some point that he's not being understood by others. So far, he doesn't seem frustrated by his lack of words, and seems to communicate very well through signs, grunts, head shakes, pointing... etc. Have any of you dealt with frustration? How did you handle it?

I'm glad that I followed my gut on the withholding approach. I suspect it wouldn't work, anyway.

Another question: do you tell strangers that your child has a speech delay, or do you just act as thought nothing's wrong? I ask because sometimes people will ask him things like ''what's your name?'' or other silly questions (that honestly, I don't think too many 22-month-olds could verbally answer). I usually just answer for him without saying anything else.

Thanks!


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## fizgig (Aug 3, 2007)

Our DS is just starting to experience real frustration so I'm not sure how we will best handle it. He is verbalizing a lot and we sometimes just can't figure out what he is saying and he looks at us like we are kind of slow 

I generally don't mention his delay unless there is a reason (they are asking him questions and getting insistent, etc). I've realized that most of the time no one even notices and I'm making a real effort to not make it a big deal for anyone (especially him!). There have been a few times at the park where I've explained to get someone to leave him alone since people sometimes take it personally when kids don't respond to them. Right now we are actually starting to have to deal with other kids talking to him and they don't seem to understand. I'd be curious to hear if anyone else is dealing with that issue.


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## Peony (Nov 27, 2003)

DS1 rarely exhibits frustration, maybe it just hasn't appeared yet. I never know with him. When people ask him questions, I just respond for him and sometimes say he is quiet boy or can be difficult to understand or say nothing at all about him not responding.


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## chel (Jul 24, 2004)

My dd is 20m and just put two words together, "no mama".







. Not my ideal phrase, but she only has a handful of words so not much to work with. So far we're in a wait and see.


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## voca (Jul 28, 2010)

At 22 months I am pretty sure my daughter had less than 15 spoken words, though she probably had upward of 30 ASL signs at that point. Now at 25 months I have lost count of both words and signs, and we get lots of two-three word phrases. She can do more than three words but it seems to take a lot of effort, signed sentences are more common. She had no words at all at 16 months, though she started signing a little around 14-15 months. Neither my sister or I talked beyond Mama and Dada until about 2.5, similarly for my cousins, so my family actually consider her an early talker!

Getting a proper evaluation wouldn't hurt at all and appropriate therapy might be a good idea. I just wanted to reassure you that plenty of kids start "late" without there being anything wrong per se.

I certainly wouldn't deny him when he signs. Communication is communication. Speech is just a handy medium. If he signs already, why not try to teach him more ASL signs, build on the language development he has? Keep in mind that ASL is just another language, so from the point of view of brain development it is stimulating the same capacities.


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## mamandedeux (Jan 15, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *APToddlerMama*
> 
> Have you seen an ENT? Fluid in the inner ear is a really common cause of speech delays. Several kids I had on my caseload had tubes placed in their ears and their speech really took off. The fluid can make things sound like the kids are listening to speech under water which will obviously impact what they learn to say. If you haven't yet seen an ENT, I would do that for sure. It can be such an easy solution. Good luck mama!


Quick update: we are finally seeing an ENT next month, and will look at getting tubes put in. He still has fluid that doesn't seem to be draining.

Speech-wise, he's gained about 20 words in the last month, but still prefers to communicate in non-verbal ways. I'm super frustrated with speech therapy, but I don't want to vent right now, so I'll wait to cool off a bit.

I'm really worried about my little guy.


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## Xavismom (Dec 22, 2009)

My DS is 23 months, and he pretty much just says Mom and Dad.

He has said many words, and even some phrases before, but its like he says something once or twice, and then never says it again. When he does say something it is easily understandable.

DH & I are sort of wait and see right now. DS is very advanced in other ways, and he does not seem frustrated about communication at all. He is pretty adept at letting us know exactly what he wants with gestures, and he clearly understands what we say to him. My DH is much, much more laid back about it than I am though. I will admit, there are some days it really really bothers/worries me. DH says its obvious he COULD talk, he just chooses not to at this point in time, and to let him do things at his own pace.

Also, I have no idea if this really means anything, but my DH is high-functioning. He cant remember when he really started talking, but he thinks it was pretty late. DS seems to be showing the same affinity for mathematics/mechanical interests as DH.

I am really excited for DS to start talking to me. I cant wait to hear what he has to say.


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## APToddlerMama (Oct 5, 2009)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *mamandedeux*
> 
> Quick update: we are finally seeing an ENT next month, and will look at getting tubes put in. He still has fluid that doesn't seem to be draining.
> 
> ...


Sending you hugs OP. It is hard not to worry about our kids. Twenty words in a month is fantastic though! That is truly reason to celebrate. Honestly the fact that he still has fluid in his ears means there is a very, very good chance that tubes will solve all his communication issues. Trust me, I'd take that over years of speech therapy. Good luck!


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## graciegal (Jun 2, 2009)

You know, I didnt talk until I was 24 months old and now I have three PhDs. Seriously, dont worry too much.


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## tropicana (Sep 11, 2011)

i am a sucker for these threads b/c my daughter was a late talker. precious few words all the way till 2.5 yo. and then...

... language explosion that didn't quit.

she is and always was highly social.

just started talking at 2.5 in full sentences.

is now 5.5 and *highly articulate* uses advanced vocabulary and never.shuts.up.for.anything.

if your son is advanced in receptive language and highly social, watch out -- he is probably going to follow my daughter's pattern.

by contrast, the neighbor girl talked up a storm super early. by the time she turned 5 she was so full of anxiety she had selective mutism by my observation.

my daughter loves talking with anybody and everybody. you can send her up to the counter at stores to ask questions, she will make phone calls happily, etc., etc.

i just have to chime in on these threads since ours was such a come-from-behind success story.

realizing of course that not all late talkers are simply late talkers. for some, talking late is a sign of a more significant problem.

but i do believe that the parent "knows" if everything else is on track, and thus, it is simply talking late.

in reading the OP, that's what it sounded like to me.


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## tropicana (Sep 11, 2011)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *mamandedeux*
> 
> Thanks for sharing, mamas. It is good to hear that progress does come. Although I don't feel his lack of speech is holding my DS back at all, my biggest fear is that he'll realize at some point that he's not being understood by others. So far, he doesn't seem frustrated by his lack of words, and seems to communicate very well through signs, grunts, head shakes, pointing... etc. Have any of you dealt with frustration? How did you handle it?
> 
> ...


i wouldn't. plenty of kids who DO talk turn shy when questioned by strangers. my son, who is a lot more typical in developing his speech, talks up a storm in the privacy of our home, but as soon as someone talks to him in public, he hides between my legs. his chatterbox sister (the late talker) is more than happy to step in and answer any questions, and then start another conversation with the inquirer.


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## APToddlerMama (Oct 5, 2009)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *tropicana*
> 
> but i do believe that the parent "knows" if everything else is on track, and thus, it is simply talking late.


I'm not trying to be a pain in the butt, but from my own experience as a parent as well as having worked in the Early Intervention program, I do not find this to be true at all for at least 50% of parents and probably way more like 80%. My husband for one was in total denial about my son's needs for a very long time despite speech evaluations, etc. confirming my suspicions. Working in EI, I had the opportunity to follow kids for a long period of time starting with the pediatrician's referral where the ped had concerns and the parents totally disagreed but were just going through the motions and "knew" their kids were fine, up to the point where it became very obvious that there was something very seriously atypical about the child's development that could not be argued with. Lots and lots of parents are in denial. We don't want to hear that our child is struggling or having challenges. It can be a very difficult and heartbreaking thing to admit to ourselves and the worry about the future is overwhelming. It is no wonder parents struggle with whether or not to even accept the possibility that our children may not just be simply talking late.

Also, there is absolutely no harm in seeking an evaluation and doing therapy. It is a no-lose situation. The alternative of standing by and doing nothing when there is an problem is a big time losing situation. There is a reason Early Intervention is so important and it is because it does makie a big impact on how a child does long term. It is truly impossible to know with any late talker if they are just a late talker, or if they are likely to have more significant developmental issues long term. There is no crystal ball that will tell us that. Given that is what parents have to work with, I really think being proactive is a much better route than the watch and wait game. Just my opinion...


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## Mosaic (Jun 20, 2005)

Well, put me on the list of "I think everything is A-OK" but I may be a total idiot!

DD2 is 19months old and has been seeing a SLP since birth for feeding issues. In one of our many (fruitless) attempts to get to the bottom of her feeding issues, we did a developmental eval via EI that showed her quite delayed in communication skills as well (NOT related to the feeding issues, though I understand they frequently come together). We had a second speech evaluation done about a month later to see if she really, really tests as delayed because DD is bilingual. In that month she gained a lot of ground and tested out at about 12 months expressive and 15 months receptive. We have not started speech therapy because the services coordinator thinks that she'll catch up, especially given how much she gained in the month it took for the second evaluation. She did, however, flunk her hearing test (both ears, all frequencies), so I need to follow up on that even though I think that was a fluke (fluid from a cold or something). We just moved last month and are looking for a new ped, hence the delay.

I definitely don't talk to people about her speech delay. At this age, a kiddo not answering could be anything from a speech delay to a cranky kid!


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## APToddlerMama (Oct 5, 2009)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Mosaic*
> 
> Well, put me on the list of "I think everything is A-OK" but I may be a total idiot!


Just have to say that I am guessing OP's son is totally going to be fine too. Especially with the recent gains as well as the fluid in the ears. My big post earlier was really just to say that there is no harm in doing early intervention no matter what boat someone is in and I see a lot of parents on here sharing their kiddos success stories when there are serious red flags in the original posters (not *this* OP, but others) narrative. I see a lot of MDC mamas trying to settle the worries of other mamas and I see the point for those who have had good outcomes, but it is a massive problem when a child really does have a developmental delay and is not just a late talker. Just trying to balance that I guess. A parent can never go back and capture those months or years when they did nothing and it turns out the child really could have used some assistance. EI makes a big difference for kids long term.


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## ~cassie (Aug 31, 2009)

My son has been n speech for nearly 4 years and he is only 4 and a few months 

-The best thing you can really do is to just narrate everything you do. "we are putting your shoes on. We are now putting your jacket on. Now let's open the door" etc. It really becomes second nature and I did it with my youngest unconsciously and that really helped him advance in language. Lots of books-you don't necessarily have to read the book-but look at it and point out what is happening on the page. Let him find the dog or the bird or whatever it is. This really helped my son wth comprehension and building vocabulary.

I encouraged talking as much as possible. At first he wanted to sign for everything and I tried 3x at each instance to get him to verbalize a response before I would give him something. So if he came to me and signed "milk" then I would say to him "milk" and really enunciate it. And I would do that 3x in hopes to get him to say it. He would still get it if he didn't verbalize and I would help him expand his sentences as he got each word. I usually had him say the main word "milk" then we progressed to "want milk" for a week or 2 and then "I want milk" or "want milk me"(how his was) until he really got it.

But really. All the tricks in the book-narrating my life/his life is what worked. My son is 4 yrs old and is still about 6-9 months delayed. He is deaf but his speech is so good for the amount of time he has been hearing. You can't force your child to talk and it can easily become a power struggle. Language may not come easy to him or there may be another reason that he is having trouble or most likely he will be just fine. But don't push it. Just expose him to language as often as you can and it will come.


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## liberal_chick (May 22, 2005)

I'm another with a pretty speech delayed kiddo. My ds is just over 2.5 and says fewer than 20 words. We started speech therapy a few weeks ago and he is still being evaluated to try to identify the problem, if there is one. If you'd have asked me a month ago, I would have sworn my ds was somewhere on the spectrum. But once we went to the ped for a speech referral she screened him for autism and said she didn't think that was the culprit. The speech therapist did an even more in depth screening and said the same thing. Ds is a wonderful communicator, but his expressive language is so poor (more than 2 standard deviations, said the therapist) that we were told on his first visit that he absolutely would qualify for therapy and insurance would foot the bill.


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## Peony (Nov 27, 2003)

OP, maybe a different SLP? I really liked our EI one, and so did DS1. We saw her for 10 months, he made some progress but it certainly wasn't amazing and then we had to go to private therapy. OMG. The new SLP had all sorts of tricks up her sleeve and his progress with her has been amazing. We also recently enrolled him in a local speech playgroup with other speech delayed children run by a SLP for 1-2 mornings a week and he loves it.


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## tillymonster (May 12, 2011)

I am glad I found this thread! Mine is 23mo and she has about 5-10 vocal words and 10-30 ASL signs plus more I know I am forgetting! She's babbling like CRAZY so I know more language is coming. She seems to get frustrated and whiney prettyoften these days-- I just don't understand her at all sometimes!

I am constantly annoyed with family/friends telling me she may be autistic because she's SUPER smart, shy and basically knows what she wants, doesn't let people hold her or touch her. Doesn't speak or sign on command.

I really don't feel like I need to get her evaluated but reading about this inner ear fluid is making me wonder. Should I ask her doc about it? They have never said anything about things to check on if her speech is delayed because I never mentioned it being an issue. Again glad I read this...


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## mamandedeux (Jan 15, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Peony*
> 
> OP, maybe a different SLP? I really liked our EI one, and so did DS1. We saw her for 10 months, he made some progress but it certainly wasn't amazing and then we had to go to private therapy. OMG. The new SLP had all sorts of tricks up her sleeve and his progress with her has been amazing. We also recently enrolled him in a local speech playgroup with other speech delayed children run by a SLP for 1-2 mornings a week and he loves it.


I would love a speech playgroup. I'll ask about that.

I've been thinking about switching to a different SLP. I probably should just to see whether it's just me, or if she really isn't doing it for us. I can't understand why 30 mins. of guided play counts as speech therapy, when I do the EXACT same thing with him for hours every week. For example, she had him pull out different coloured poker chips from a bag and stack them on the matching colour shape on the table. He was supposed to say ''more'' before she allowed him to take one from the bag, and then attempt to say the colour after she said it. He would kinda oblige her (say ''mmmmmo'' then wait for her to open the bag), but that's it. Half an hour, $50 later, and no progre ss. I do the exact same thing at home with similar tools. Why am I paying for this? She doesn't offer any info on how this is supposed to be helping either.

OK, rant over.

I made a list of all his new words. He can now say (or approximate) 50 words. The problem, and why I remain concerned, is that while I can get him to tell me what the names for different objects are, he rarely does so without prompting. For example, he can say water, but if he wants to drink he'll stand in front of the sink screaming mommy, then point at the tap, and start signing water, cup, and do the drinking gesture. Why not just say ''water''? He said a word (mommy), pointed numerous times (sink, me, himself), signed 3 different signs, and even acted it out. If I tell him to say water, he'll look at me and say water. But if I ask him right away what he wants, same theatrics. This happens with just about everything (wanting to go out, looking for a toy...).

Also, although he can clearly say car, train, and name a whole bunch of animals, he prefers to use the sounds instead (broummm, choo-choo, meow, woof...). My DS1 also did this for a long time, despite being very verbal at a young age, so I don't know...

He also just this week started combining some words (he says ''snow brrrr'' - meaning cold snow, and ''mommy car'', ''daddy car'' pointing at our respective cars.) I guess that's good progress.

Thanks for being there.


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## Peony (Nov 27, 2003)

Definitely seek out other SLPS then. Our EI one is back as of today (she was severely injured and unable to work for months) and when I was sitting here watching the session, I was reminded again that it isn't anything that I don't do with him already. Just like you were describing, we name toys, talk very simply, slowly, try to get him to repeat, and that is exactly what she does. Our private SLP has a slightly different approach, and while it is similar, it just works so much better for him. She has phrase cards/pictures that she uses often and is quite strict about how he can and can not play with her. He is probably up to 50 words now with her and I would say he was at 20 3 months ago with the other one. I would never play with him they way that she does because it is quite calculated, but he is responding. Just a different approach can make a difference.


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## mamandedeux (Jan 15, 2010)

A few updates:

We saw the ENT last month. His opinion is that his ears are super gunked up with fluid and thickened wax. We agreed to have tubes put in. Surgery should be in Feb. or March. The ENT also said I was probably wasting my money on speech therapy, and that I should just give it another 3 months and see after the tubes. Which led me to contact our local EI people and ask for a speech assessment. I figured if we qualified for services, then perhaps I wouldn't be wasting my money since, well... it's free.

We met with the speech pathologist and she did a very thorough assessment (almost 2 hours, at least an hour one-on-one with DS) and her conclusion is that he is NOT really speech delayed. She agrees that he does have some pronunciation difficulties, but based on her findings, he is somewhere between the 24-30 month milestone scale (DS is 25 months). However, I think that if she would have met him last month, her findings would have been totally different. His vocabulary has exploded in the last few weeks, and he now probably has a few hundred words (he had about 50 at the end of Nov.), and he's combining 2-3 words all the time. He's very hard to understand, though, but I guess that's normal since he literally had no words until a few months ago.

We're happy!


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## Spring Lily (Sep 26, 2006)

Mamandedeux, that is great news.







I just popped into this thread because two of my kids were late talkers, and my DS sounded so much like yours. He only had maybe a dozen words at 25 months, wasn't putting words together, and we did the speech evalutation through EI. He had a 6 month delay (not enough to get services in our area). I was so upset at the time. The speech therapist was impressed with his comprehension though and said that is a really good sign.

About 2 weeks later he suddenly started saying more words, and by 26 months he had about 60 words and was using 3 word sentences! It was quite a shock how fast it happened. A year later, he's totally on track and tells long, long stories all the time, is able to fully express himself with peers and adults, it's really amazing. I was so worried about him going to preschool if he couldn't express himself or other adults couldn't understand him, but that's not the case at all. We do try to work on clarity with him, but there are plenty of other kids in his class I can't understand at all, so I'm not too worried. Of course, my DS didn't have the ear issues you're dealing with, so it's different, but I thought you might like to hear a positive story from the other side. I bet after the tubes you are going to see some real progress with him.


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## SeattleRain (Mar 15, 2009)

My son is 18 months and we've been in EI for speech delay for 6 months now. He has 1 sign (all done) and sometimes will say "mo" if he wants more. That's it. Oh, and sometimes he'll say "vroom" if I coach him while he's playing with trucks and cars. I'm not super pleased with the progress he's making, I had expected that he would have more language by now. When we went for our 18 month visit, it was obvious that she felt like that as well and seemed to be concern. His ears are fine, we had a hearing test done at the deafness center. We've had two speech therapists come and look at him, one works with him once a week, and a whole team of therapists to come and do a total eval and all of them essentially ruled out autism because of how social and interactive he is with others. I get a sense that's not really his problem either. I can't pinpoint it, but I still feel like there might be something going on with his hearing or his ears. Sometimes I feel like he doesn't hear me and doesn't seem to know what I'm saying, even if it's a song I've sung a million times or a phrase I say all the time. He doesn't seem to have much reference to the phrase "mama" or "daddy" which is really frustrating. Actually, that might not be totally true because sometimes when he's frustrated he'll say "mamamama" which very well could be his way of "alerting" me to something being amiss. But if he's in his crib and wakes up and wants me to come get him, he doesn't yell for me.

His receptive language has definitely improved since we started EI, though its hard to say if its the EI or just time. His spoken language has not improved really at all. I'm starting to wonder whether I should get him re-evaluated, both his speech and his hearing just to get a second opinion. Do you think this is a good idea?


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## mamandedeux (Jan 15, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *SeattleRain*
> 
> My son is 18 months and we've been in EI for speech delay for 6 months now. He has 1 sign (all done) and sometimes will say "mo" if he wants more. That's it.


That's more than what DS2 had at 18 months. I think he sometimes said mama, but I'm not sure he meant it in context. Words began appearing at 20 months (I think the SLP counted 3 words as real words when he was assessed at 20 months: mama, dada and there). By 22 months he had 15 or so, and then really started gaining 1-2 words a week. The last few weeks, he's had 2-3 new words A DAY!!!!!!!!

It's clear that he doesn't acquire speech in a typical manner, though, so who knows how quickly he'll catch up. I'm surrounded by 2 year olds all day long, and it's very obvious that DS2 is not talking as much as they are. My DS1 had 4-word sentences at 18 months, so I know I shouldn't compare, but still.

I'm really of two minds: although it may be best to wait and see and really just appreciate the fact that kids develop at different rates, what if there is an underlying cause that you (as the parent) are missing? One month ago, I was so sure that my DS2 would never talk because he didn't, but now that he'll actually say``oh, hi mommy'' when I walk into a room makes me think that we'll get there.


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## beebalmmama (Jul 21, 2005)

We're currently in the process of trying to get ds (25 months) evaluated with EI. Hopefully we'll have some sort of meeting this week. I was more of the 'don't worry and wait approach', but I don't want to wait any longer considering his slow progress. Also we had the experience with our older ds (now 6yrs) that getting speech help once in public school was much more difficult (funding). His teacher couldn't understand him in kindergarten but he wasn't "bad enough" to receive help. So I want to make sure we see if we can get help for ds 2 while he still qualifies for EI.

His language is really taking off in the last few weeks, however most words are still only the first two sounds "mo", do (dog), doe (door), "wa" (water). He has around 10 words and 20-25 signs. I think he's coming along with more and babbles a lot more, which he never to rarely did before 18 months. His receptive has always been very good, so I have no concerns there. He just often still grunts with inflections in his voice, instead of trying to voice words.

We do a lot of repeating words and sounds and we do a lot of letter sounds, kind of like you would with phonics for reading. He's always loved letters and so we figured at least we can encourage him to vocalize the sounds he needs and he will repeat letter sounds much more often than words. He will actually come get us to write down letters and he tells us the sound and we write the letter down. He loves it! Dh and I have joked that he'll be reading before he speaks!


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## anjsmama (Apr 6, 2011)

To you mamas in the midst of it: My DS is now 3.5 y/o. He didn't babble beyond "baba" until 18 months. At this time last year (2.5 y/o) when my DD was born, my DS said less than 20 words. Mom, dad, water, ball, please, thank you, night night, no... It was very, very limited. But he was not on the spectrum & his receptive language skills were evaluated at 40 months (when he was 28 months) and that turned out to be all that mattered. When he was 30 months (last February), he woke up one day speaking in sentences. Literally.

At 3.5 y/o, he has an immense vocabulary, an insane ability to understand and retain things and talk about them later, and he NEVER ever ever ever shuts up. I mean I adore him, but he never stops talking. His SLP and many others around MDC recommended the narrative style version of life - "Mama changing your diaper. Now you're fresh and clean. Are you comfy now?" which I did pretty much from the time he was a year on... and while it worked (was that what did it?) - it also came back to bite me in a rather obnoxious way! "Mom, let's put on our coats. Okay - can you open the door now so we can go outside? Then we'll go downstairs and get in the van so we can drive to the park. Let's go to the blue park. We'll drive to the blue park, but not til you buckle me in." Yikes! Not saying you shouldn't do it, just a fair warning.


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## wishin'&hopin' (Jun 2, 2008)

Thanks Anjsmama, I'm to the point where I want to cry every time someone else decides to list to me all the words their child is saying. This morning a parent of a 14 month old (my DS is 21 months) did this and I wanted to weep. DS says, "blue" (boo); "stars" (sta); "mama"; "mommom"; "water" (wawawa); and makes many animal noises. But, that's it...apart from the constant singing to himself with vowel sounds and lispy sounding Ls.


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## mamandedeux (Jan 15, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *wishin'&hopin'*
> 
> Thanks Anjsmama, I'm to the point where I want to cry every time someone else decides to list to me all the words their child is saying. This morning a parent of a 14 month old (my DS is 21 months) did this and I wanted to weep. DS says, "blue" (boo); "stars" (sta); "mama"; "mommom"; "water" (wawawa); and makes many animal noises. But, that's it...apart from the constant singing to himself with vowel sounds and lispy sounding Ls.


What is it with people? A family friend that we hadn't seen in a long time mentioned last weekend that we really should have someone look at DS2 (she doesn't know he's already in ST) because her DS was talking wayyyyy more (her DS is 15 months!!!!!! - ouch!). She told us all the words he could say and then tried to get our DS to repeat them. She actually laughed when (of course) he was unable to, saying it was ''cute'' that he was at least trying.

Wishin', if both our DSs got together, we would have a clear ''star' since my DS says ''ar'' for star. Hang in there!


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## fizgig (Aug 3, 2007)

Posting an update as well since I didn't know what was up with DS the first time I posted here. We have since seen a developmental ped and she diagnosed our son with Mixed Expressive Receptive Language Disorder which has been a relief since it helps us understand what is up. This dx is basically a fancy word for a late talker and many kids with this just catch up (though some don't and continue to have language processing issues). DS is almost 3 now and his language is taking off in just the last month. We began signing with him more consistently and it was like magic. I don't know why but him starting to sign more also encouraged more spoken vocab. I'd say we are up to 50 words now and his receptive is also booming.

My advice at this point to other mom's of late talkers is to get them checked BUT make sure you go to an expert that you trust. When DS was 2.5 and his receptive language was really lagging he was very social in general but also didn't respond well to his name, didn't make good eye contact with strangers, etc. We went to an SLP who immediately decided he was autistic and pushed for intensive intervention (I mean 30-40 hours a week!). It didn't seem right to me and so I sought out an expert and she confirmed my suspicions that his red flags were all tied to language issues (and are all basically gone at this point). Since then his dx has been confirmed by a dev psychologist as well as a number of SLPs. Only reason I share is that getting the RIGHT help does matter. An accurate dx is really important when they get closer to 2.5 or 3 I think. Though basic language stuff (recasting, narrating their actions, talking to them at their level, focusing on give and take interaction) can't ever hurt in my opinion.

Things with our DS are going really well now so don't worry too much about your little ones and make sure you enjoy their toddler-hood!


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## BusyDaddy (Oct 1, 2015)

*Late talkers*

Hello
Is this thread still active?
I was wondering if there are parents of late talkers around. 
My son is in that category, and it would sure help to hear from others that went through this...


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## slackjames (Oct 13, 2015)

Hi everyone. My apologies for reviving what appears to be a dead thread. I'm new here but am reaching out to other parents for the first time. 

My son is 25 months and is in the 12 month range for speech and communication. He also ranges about 18 months in motor skills. They tell me he has a developmental delay. I have worked with him on sign language and he's a pretty good signer but his vocabulary is very small.

Recently we have began developmental therapy. Our first real session is in two weeks. I'm wondering if anyone can give me a brief overview of what to expect and maybe some tips on how I can better help my son. Thanks.


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## albanianmama (Oct 16, 2015)

My daughter has an expressive/receptive delay. EI is coming to my house in two weeks. I can't wait to get the process started. My daughter was initially misdiagnosed as being on the lower end of the spectrum but I used my contacts in the special needs world and got her reevaluated at two other centers and seen by a developmental specialist. She is not on the spectrum but does have the speech delay. 

Don't despair. I did at first because I had enjoyed being on the outside. I had enjoyed being the one to advocate but suddenly I had to take on a new role. I took my mom hat off and took a rational approach. Late talking happens in 1 in 5 children. Moms have a tendency to brag about the things their children can do or say. The best thing you can do for your own sanity is to observe but not compare. Always keep checking the checklists doctors provide about the normal development of a child. These are rough estimates of when your child should be doing or saying things and how. If you feel concerned EVER, see your childs doctor and if they blow that off, go ahead and get a second opinion. No one needs to know and you will put your mind at east.

NEVER ever wait. Early intervention works. I have seen kids move out of being considered on the spectrum and shedding speech delays after intense early intervention. Its the best thing you can do.


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## bpicc4 (5 mo ago)

Is there still people active in this thread?


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## ramsimens (4 mo ago)

Thinks yes.


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