# 14 mo old on verge of "failure to thrive" diagnosis



## lkmiscnet (Jan 12, 2009)

This despite BFing on demand since birth. He nurses about 8 times a day on average and still wakes up around 3 times at night to nurse (we co-sleep).

He was born a month premature. He is technically 15 mo old, but his "corrected age" is 14 mo.

He just had a ped appt today and the dr is concerned that his weight keeps falling off. His height is in the 50th percentile, but wt is not keeping up and he hasn't been on the charts since about 6 mo of age. He only gained 1 lb 4 oz in 3 mo and is only just over 18 lbs. She said at the 50th percentile, he should weight 25 lbs! She would like to see a 2-3 lb wt gain by his next appt in 3 mo or he will need to be deemed a failure to thrive.

I started him on solids at 7 mo, but he has never developed a ravenous appetite and I'm usually hard pressed to get him to eat much. He is very picky and I find I have to trick him to eat more. He loves avocado though (which is great) and I have to pretend to be scooping from the avocado, even though it's a different food on the spoon, just to get some other stuff in him.

I try to give him whole milk yogurt daily for breakfast. It usually takes him lunch and dinner to finish it up. It's maybe 1/4 c of it or less. I mix in applesauce usually. Then, I still have the challenge of getting him to eat what I've made for lunch and dinner. I make his baby food, so most is frozen purees of various beans, fruits and veggies, supplemented by some store bought baby food for variety. he gets chunks of fruit and cut up green beans too.

I just bought whole milk to give him in a sippy cup which his ped suggested.

Ironically, I previously posted about my concerns about his lack of eating as I was totally stressed out reading about what other kiddos his age were eating and the majority seemed to think that I shouldn't stress about it and that BM was sufficient for his needs. Well, unfortunately, that may not be my particular case because I would presume he would otherwise still be thriving. Of course, we can only surmise it's because he is not getting adequate nutrition and it's not some other underlying issue. His ped suspects it's simply food.

I am a vegetarian and probably don't get as much protein as I should be getting, though I do supplement with whey protein powder and protein bars. Now that I think about it, I probably do get a decent amount of protein. I also eat lots of nuts. However, I've always had a low fat diet, aside from all the nuts. In fact, I was just planning on cutting the nuts out because I was gaining weight from snacking on them too much. Everything else I eat is fat free.

His ped also said that all the brain growth takes place in the first 2 years of life, and that it was a concern if he wasn't getting adequate nutrition, but that there was still time to make up for it up until he turns 2. She assured me that no permanent damage has been done. But still, it worries me that his brain may not have developed as it could have if it were well fed essentially, and no one can know for sure whether it's full potential has been hampered.

His ped also said that his milestones accomplishments are the equivalent of about a 9 mo old based on my answers to some standard questions. He is not walking yet. Can't point out any body parts when prompted despite us pointing out his nose, eyes, ears, etc for months now. He apparently should have a vocabulary of 3-5 words by now, but only says mama and dada and doesn't know what they mean, which doesn't count apparently. He doesn't make an effort to walk when I try to hold him up and walk him, whereas most kids his age will put weight on their feet, something like marching in place.

He had done 3 mo of weekly physical therapy between 4-6 mo of age, but it was worthless because he would cry hysterically the whole time. We pulled him out and he eventually caught up.

I also just had an Early Intervention rep here last month and she deemed him normal and not needing any assistance.

His issues could be due to him not getting the proper nutrition, as I googled and read that lack of vital nutrients could cause developmental delays. However, he has not been around other babies (just joined a play group), so that could be a major part of the developmental delays as well.

In any event, I feel like a failure as a mom. I research like crazy about baby stuff, but yet, he's still going through this because of me. And, being a stay at home mom, where I interact with him every day, how could this happen right before my eyes?

Just wanted to see if anyone else has experienced this, what may have caused it, and what you did to resolve it.


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## batsister (Jul 21, 2009)

I'm sorry; that sounds really rough. I don't have any direct advice but was wondering if some sort of developmental delay could be causing the lack of interest in eating/low weight? Or if some underlying issue might be causing the eating/weight problem and the perceived delays? Perhaps your pediatrician could recommend a specialist to see? (Or I could be totally off-base, but it's just a thought... in any case, I hope things get better for your family soon).


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## Prairiemother (Feb 4, 2005)

I am sorry you are going through this. It sounds like you are such a caring mom, and I am sure you doing well by your LO.

However, you may be right that your baby (and you, since you are breastfeeding) need a lot more fat in your diet. I know it can be tough to get on a vegetarian diet (speaking from experience). Do you eat eggs? If so, perhaps you can get some eggs from chickens raised outside in the fresh air where they can eat bugs and run around in the grass - the fat from such eggs is supposed to be very high quality and good for brain development. I don't worry about fat making me or my children fat. Good fat (that is, real fat, not stuff made up in a lab somewhere) is healthy, and children need a lot of it. We eat fairly good doses of organic butter, coconut oil and eggs. It is expensive, but if only the kids eat it the cost isn't bad.

Keep up the good mothering!


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## Tjej (Jan 22, 2009)

Is it possible that the delays may have to do with prematurity?

You didn't list many fatty foods in what you described. I'd think about how to get more fat in - will he eat nuts?

The World Health Organization has different growth charts that are more based on BFing than the regular charts (although it isn't exclusively BF babies). You can find them online and see how they compare to his growth curve for another source.

Tjej


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## quietmim (Jul 24, 2010)

DD was almost eight pounds at birth and since six months has been running 5-10 percentile for weight and 65th for height. She bf's on demand and eats a wide variety of solids, but not much. She eats organic roasted chicken, eggs, whole milk yougurt, peas, watermelon.. We have done some extra weight checks, but the ped has mostly been reassuring that my little lady is just little.
The developmental delays are something else. My friend has 14 month old twins born at 30 wks and they seem to be similar to your son in terms of development. These delays have been attributed to prematurity and they are involved in an early intervention program that includes therapy in their home.
I just wonder if the developmental stuff can be comepletely explained by nutrition. If it were me I would want to explore other causes for it and I would look into the possiblity of having someone work with your baby on the walking and talking, ect...
E.


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## 7thDaughter (Jan 8, 2006)

My full term daughter wouldn't gain weight. Born at 10th percentile, she dropped to 5th. She nursed constantly and was always restless. She wouldn't touch solids until 11 months, and ate like a bird thereafter. We did a variety of medical tests, all negative. Unlike your child, she didn't drop off the 5% line, so in the end I had to stop worrying. She weaned at 2-1/2. She will always be 3" shorter than me, and there are some mild behavioral issues - mainly that she runs a year or two behind her peers in development, a problem that will solve itself. I don't mind having a late bloomer!









I ate mostly low fat and vegetarian, with a meat or fish dish a couple times a week. I was convinced I was doing the right thing. But today I have come to believe she needed better nourishment during pregnancy and nursing than I gave her, and her behavior was signaling that need. If I were to re-live those months, I would eat a diet high in natural fats during pregnancy and nursing: lots of real butter, whole milk, eggs, and yes, animal fat: grass-fed cows, free-range chickens, no hormones or antibiotics. Wild caught fish.

This flies against what so many people say, esp vegetarians. I respect those views. But you are very worried, and I have to offer the idea for you to think about. I wish someone had talked to me this way. The circles I ran in all said a healthy mother's milk was always sufficiently nourishing, and no alternative thought was ever voiced. So, I will never know if I could have helped my daughter by changing my diet.

Perhaps you could experiment, eat a high-fat diet for six weeks and see if he puts on weight. At least you would know. It might make no difference. If it works, he'll be back on track, and you can return to your preferred diet after he is weaned.


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## accountclosed2 (May 28, 2007)

A baby doesn't have to be in the same percentile for weight and height - if that was the case all babies would be the same shape! DD has always been much higher for height than weight, for most of her first year she was between 25th and 50th for height, but below 3rd for weight. That's ok, as long as they keep gaining.

I checked the WHO chart, and if I read it right, your son is above the 3rd percentile for weight, so definitely on the chart. If I were you I'd chart him on the WHO chart, perhaps the drop hasn't been so much there, a lot of babies don't gain much when they get closer to a year. Maybe he's just tall and lean?

And with the developmental delays, for several years I nannied for a little boy who had been born prematurely. While he was and is a wonderful little boy, and is now doing great in school, he was very delayed. 15 months isn't actually late for not yet walking, it is on the scope of normal, the little boy I cared for walked around 18 months, I think (for what it's worth, so did my SIL, who wasn't premature or delayed at all). He didn't talk at all until he was over 2, and for the first 6 months only rarely, and about six words or so (Moon, Saw, Hammer, Cat, Mamma, Daddy). Then, just as his appointment with EI came up, he exploded with 50-100 words in a week. He was still difficult to understand for a long time, as there was pronunciation issues, but he was constantly, if slowly, getting better. By 5 he was like every other 5 yo.

He also had huge food issues, he was very little, and his parents had been very pushed to make him eat and gain from an early age, so by the time I met him, at nearly 2, all the issues had compounded to make him a little boy who hardly ate at all, who had huge texture issues and was almost frightened of food and mess. Food issues, however, are apparently common with preemies. We worked on it, played with food, cooked together, with no pressure (and I made him vegetable juices for a while, which he loved), and over the next year he came so far, and by 3 1/2 his favourite lunch was a creamy (milk and buttery) vegetable soup (of his own choice from ice cube frozen vegies), usually pumpkin, sweet potato, courgette or broccoli, with some beans, cooked and frozen for protein, in which he'd dip slices of bread!

Is he strong? Is he happy? Does he seem healthy in other respects?

Oh, and as a mother of a baby who WAS really underweight for a bit, how is his head circumference? Is it growing appropriately (following whichever line, as long as it is increasing properly)? We learnt that THAT is a true sign of when a child may not be getting enough nutrients.


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## babygirlie (Jun 4, 2009)

I actually had to scroll up to make sure I didn't write this. All of the responses I am finding very comforting.

My baby is also 15 months old, 6 weeks early and has all the same issues though she gets formula (sadly). So I guess she is getting decent vitamins and fats from the formula but still the same as yours. Isn't avocado pure good fat? Mine refuses it. Anyway, she's not walking, pointing nor talking, Though mine despises eye contact (I avoid eye contact too). She is just now eating though it's a very slow process and i have to supplement with puree and formula.

When she was born she was not on the charts.. she slowly came up and was right in there at like 25 percentile. At 12 months she just stopped growing it seemed and only gained 2 pounds in the next 3 months which kind of worried me but she has a belly so not really. She had dropped to like 10th percentile. So reading this is helpful.

My dr said there was absolutely nothing wrong with her weight. I can't be sure on her height b/c she flipped out when being measured for that. But he said as long as she's on the chart things were great. Btw she is 20 pounds at 15 months.

Actually I have her last growth chart here taken at just barely shy of 15 months. These are estimates as the chart just shows lines and dots

20 pounds - 15th percentile
30 inches - 40th percentile
44.5 cm head - 15th percentile
weight versus girth 25th percentile

Though I am not the person to reassure you since I am a worrier and I haven't been getting much hope relayed to me on here. We're going to see a neuro and get her evaluated by a special autism center.


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## allaiter (Apr 11, 2008)

My daughter was "diagnosed" with FTT at 15 months when her steady growth stopped. She then went off the charts. She had gained a total of 1.5lbs in a 10 month span. At 15 monhts she weighed 15lbs. She was 8.6 when born. BF on demand and ate avacado like it was the best thing ever.
We even went to the growth clinic at the childrens Hosp., and they said to give her butter??? after I told them dairy gives her the runs...
I sarted to give her Iron supplments, Iron if it is low can affect weight gain..and brain development. She started to slowing gain weight after the iron. Since you are a Veg. and do not eat a ton of protien your Iron-you sons Iron could be low. This also affects sleep. I found my DD sleeps better since the Iron as well.
All along her development was where it needed to be so I was not to worried.
IF they do diagnose you or you just want some support this webistt/community is for growth issues and they are awesome! they will even connect you with a member who's child is where you child is so you can talk with someone in your spot.
http://www.magicfoundation.org/www
I hope it helps.
mariah


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## LadyCatherine185 (Aug 12, 2008)

Mama, I am so sorry you are having such a rough time. I also wonder if his developmental delays were not somehow caused by his prematurity? Have you had him evaluated for any type of sensory disorders, or neurological issues?

My nephew was very similar to your DS at that age. At 14 months he wasn't even crawling (just army crawling), not talking, and weighed about 15 lbs. He was not BF'ing, but drank cow's milk and ate solids. His issue _was_ partly because he was not getting enough calories, but more because they were not being offered to him enough. Once they started feeding him more often (he didn't refuse the solids and would self-feed, unlike your DS) and he fattened up, he started walking and talking some, etc. He still is delayed though at 27 months.

I would suggest concentrating on getting fats in him. Straight avocado and yogurt, add coconut oil to everything, you can even give him coconut milk to drink. It has a lot of the good fats in it. Peanut/nut butters, beans. If he doesn't like to eat food, you could mix up a smoothie for him with yogurt, fruit, avocado, coconut oil, etc in it.

It really rubs me the wrong way that your ped would suggest that you may have caused him brain damage by BF'ing and not forcing solids on him. She should look into the issues more. It seems to me there is more going on than just him not getting enough fat. An underlying issue seems to be causing a lot of this, IMO.


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## OdinsMommy0409 (May 1, 2010)

My DS is 15 months and weighs 19 pounds even. We just hit that mark yesterday. He is listed as FTT by his GI, but we know he will be small looking at his daddy and myself. At 12 months, he was under 17 pounds and hadn't grown in 5 months. In the past three months, I've been very diligent with his fat and calorie intake.

He gets eggs cooked in coconut oil every morning, a morning snack, lunch (meat of some kind and veggie), afternoon snack, and dinner (meat, fruit/veggie). We also have him on DHA:EHA supplement for brain development and Floradix iron & herb supplement (anemia and weight problems can go hand in hand). Now, he doesn't always eat all his food, but DS is a snacker. He bfs at least 12x a day so he still loves the ta-ta milk. We don't do cow's milk, but I do make him smoothies with fruit and hemp milk. (DS is casein, soy, gluten, and nut free).

We've had a great improvement with his weight gain and growth the past three months. While he's still not on the CDC growth charts for weight, he is no longer falling further down and is slowly getting closer to the chart.

Anyways, I just wanted to offer encourgement that the weight gain can happen. It likely won't happen at the pace your pedi wants, but you can do little things that might help. Plus, you might check with EI for an evaluation as it can't hurt and might provide some more tools for you. Remember all our babies develop and grow within a wide range of normal.


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## 2boyzmama (Jun 4, 2007)

I'm glad your ped is being watchful but not alarmist yet, that's good to see!

A few questions...did you ped say what the next step would be if you can't get some weight gain in the next 3 months?

Have any labs been drawn? Iron, lead, that sort of thing?

What are his genetics? Your height/weight, his dad's height/weight, your siblings, aunts, uncles, grandparents, etc? And not just as adults, but as children (if known)?

Your Ped gave you a simplified explanation of how nutrition effects development. Here's a little more detail on it. Calories and nutrients first go to cognitive development, then physical growth, then other areas of development (gross motor, fine motor, etc), then fat stores. My son has been labeled FTT since he was 4 weeks old (he's now 3.5) so I've been down this road unfortunately.

Given that order above, a dr gets concerned when they see a baby with little fat stores and developmental delays, because that suggests that cognitive development could be at risk. Unfortunately it's not always easy to identify cognitive development impacts, sometimes the symptoms don't show up for years (perhaps not until school age).

BUT...that doesn't mean that there IS cognitive impairment!!! Only that there are signs that the dr should be watchful.

In my son's case, at 11 months old we finally found a reason for his growth issues, he has a chromosomal deletion, a syndrome called Velocardiofacial Syndrome or DiGeorge Syndrome. He also has numerous medical conditions and birth defects that are impacting his ability to grow normally. (he was 17lbs at 1, 20lbs at 2, 24lbs at 3)

My son's case is rare, I'm not saying your son has a genetic syndrome. But there are lots of underlying issues that could cause growth and development issues that might not have as many outward signs. Just recently a little boy was diagnosed with a form of dwarfism over on the Special Needs Parenting section, and two others have been diagnosed as having constitutional growth delays, and one other has a growth hormone deficiency. That's just here, on MDC, in the last few months.

I would focus on healthy fatty foods without being forceful at all. I'd also contact your area's Early Intervention Services (called Birth to Three or something along those lines...ask your Ped) They will do a free developmental assessment on your son and will get him therapies if he qualifies (and often they are free, my son got physical therapy, occupational therapy, speech therapy, and feeding therapy for free until his 3rd birthday. He also got into a special needs preschool for kids with developmental delays when he was 2 where he got more intensive therapy 4 mornings a week).

Good luck!


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## JBaxter (May 1, 2005)

Mine slimmed down about that time too. How active is he? How is his BM's ( formed or runny)

"if" it were me I would try to put some fats in his diet Make some full fat yogurt smoothies ( you can add ALOT to a fruit smoothie like olive oil , flax seed oil etc). Like the others said I would get some blood work done but some kids just arnt big. My DH was barely at the 3 %


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## lkmiscnet (Jan 12, 2009)

To answer all the individual questions posed&#8230;

He eats, but won't eat much or he turns his head away and is just plain picky. I've tried to hold off on BFing until he eats, but sometimes that is all he wants and he starts to cry if I don't nurse him.

I do eat eggs (and cheese). I have two a day actually. I also tried feeding him eggs, but he just spits them out. This morning, I scrambled an egg, and the pieces just ended up on the floor. I tried to mix in tiny bites with his avocado and he detected the texture and spit it out.

He did end up having about 4 oz of a broccoli/zucchini medley from Earth's Best. I added a tsp of olive oil to that as well.

For fats, I had been adding a ½ tsp of ground flaxseed to his breakfast of yogurt, but inevitably, it took him the whole day to finish it. And I probably need to increase the amount. An adult serving is supposed to be 1 tablespoon a day, so I calculated that a ½ tsp is what he would need. I thought ground would be better than the oil for the added fiber and texture. I guess I need to try for maybe a teaspoon.

Yes, his delays are likely tied to his prematurity. He had been lagging behind by about 2 months in terms of head control, sitting unassisted, and crawling, several months ago, but did learn those skills eventually.

I haven't tried feeding him nuts, per se. His dad has a peanut allergy (not life threatening though) and a slight allergy to almonds, so I was trying to avoid all nuts for a while. The science is conflicting on whether to withhold nuts or feed them when an allergic parent is in the mix. I think I will try almond, cashew and walnut butters. Isn't it unsafe to feed whole nuts due to choking at this age? Plus, he doesn't have molars yet. Only 6 teeth in front.

I'll have to compare the WHO charts to the CDC charts. I did print them out, but haven't charted his growth on them yet. Where does the time go each day??

My son was doing weekly PT (Oct-Dec), but he had sensory issues and stranger anxiety (still does) and it just was a waste of time and money, as he would cry the whole hour. He just doesn't have the temperament for it. I had an EI person at our home last month and according to her questions, he doesn't lag behind. Odd. They don't offer any feeding therapy through their program either.

He has had food issues (textures) due to his prematurity. I hear that is quite common as they end up with oral/sensory issues due to what they went through in the NICU (he was on a ventilator for a couple of days, oxygen canula the rest of his 3 week stay).

I just kick myself that my nutrition really fell off after he was born. I wasn't taking in as much protein and fats. I eat only organic veggies, fruits, eggs, bread, etc&#8230;and have always been very health oriented.

I was eating a ton of nuts I thought the past few months. I was going through probably 4 oz of pistachios a day (I think 1 oz is the recommended daily limit) and that didn't impact his weight gain, and prior to that a couple of handfuls of walnuts or almonds a day. It impacted my weight though so I stopped buying them. I didn't know about his weight concerns then though. I just bought some walnuts and almonds yesterday, along with cashew butter. I suppose the trick is to now give them to him directly rather than try to get fats into him through BM.

I also take a handful of vitamins a day, including a high potency fish oil, so I presumed that would get to him via BFing.

He also takes polyvisol with iron daily and has since he was 3 wks old. I'm not sure why he hasn't been tested for his iron levels. I thought that was part of their 12 mo check up. I just put a call into his ped this morning to inquire about that as it hasn't been done. He hasn't had any blood work at this point in time. I suspect that would be at his 18th mo appt if this continues.

His ped didn't say I may have caused brain damage. That was misunderstood from my posting. I googled failure to thrive and found this info on a Merck site:

http://www.merck.com/mmhe/sec23/ch267/ch267j.html

"Prognosis
Because the first year of life is important for brain development, children who become undernourished during this time may fall permanently behind their peers, even if their physical growth improves. In about half of these children, mental development, especially verbal skills, remains below normal, and these children often have social and emotional problems in adulthood".

THAT freaked me out. His ped was very reassuring in trying to convince me that there was no irreparable damage and there was still time (up to 2 yrs of age for brain growth) to get him up to speed. I just have my doubts that at least some damage wasn't done.

His dad is 6'2" (but the anomaly in his family) and slender. He's has always exercised daily. My DH has a brother who is 5'2", so that is a possible factor in this puzzle. I'm 5'4" and 128 lbs.

I had an amnio done at 5 mo, so not sure if that rules out ALL genetic abnormalities.

He has 1-2 BMs per day, which are formed like patties typically. If he hasn't had enough solids, they are more runny.

So, my plan is this:
Buy flaxseed oil, a DHA/EPA children's fish oil and feed lots of avocados. I will also buy tahini (ground sesame seeds) and other nut butters. I will have to thin them out somehow though so he doesn't choke on the chunkiness. I will also attempt to get more high fat dairy (milk, cheese, yogurt) in him, though I have been struggling with the yogurt daily. I also worry about doctoring up his food to the point where they taste disgusting and he won't eat them. The polyvisol with iron is awful, but I can only get it in him in his food. I can't imagine just squirting it in his mouth straight. He would gag and spit it up.

The one thing I can't control is his pickiness and seeming lack of appetite, though I really think he's just being picky. He always has room for avocado it seems even when I think he just won't eat anymore of what I'm feeding him. I am trying to work in the timing of BFing and feeding, which seems to be a factor as well. I have already given him cow's milk as of yesterday, but he hasn't drank much of it.

I'm also signing him up for playdates, as his ped said that would help with his development and social skills as he is around more toddlers and sees them walking, etc. So, I've checking out some of the local franchises (e.g. Gymboree, etc).

His ped said one next step would be to consult a dietician possibly. We didn't discuss beyond that.


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## babydanielsmom (Jan 18, 2008)

Ok first off this is what has worked for ME and MY son and I know some people on here won't agree but.... My VERY high energy son eats much better when he is distracted. At meals times we put together puzzes, color, play with flash cards, and all the while I am feeding him. He simply has too much energy to sit still just for food (kwim) but if he has something fun in front of him (like the puzzle) he will usually eat. Oh, also my Ds loves his bedtime snack while he is playing in the bathtub. I've found he will eat pretty much anything in there. Yes, I know that my not work for everyone but hey ... at least he eats







I don't want to see food become a battle ground and if this is what we have to do for now so be it.

It does sound like he needs more fat in his diet. Imo, there is nothing wrong with whole milk. You can also try to add butter, eggs, cheese, or nut butters to his diet. Is your LO on any supplements/vitamins? If not maybe you can check into some good quality ones.

Lastly, know this is NOT due to something you are doing wrong. As a Mama of a picky eater I know just how you feel. Please PM me if you want to talk more


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## babydanielsmom (Jan 18, 2008)

One more thing, those Poly Vi Sol Vitamins ARE gross> My Ds liked these much better

http://www.amazon.com/Natures-Plus-A.../dp/B000MBUJUI


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## lkmiscnet (Jan 12, 2009)

I guess we can only speculate whether or not my Bmilk is lacking in any nutrients. I'm still a bit skeptical on that somewhat, though I can't explain why he is not putting on much weight despite nursing on demand. I'm not happy with my belly fat presumably from all the nuts I've eaten either...

It would be interesting to test my BM for nutrients. Wonder if that can be done?

I think it's more that since he is so high energy, he can't be on a predominantly liquid diet.

It's dinner time now, and thus far, he has had maybe 5 oz of food today and a few chunks of cantaloupe. He just won't eat much of what I'm giving him. He turns his face away, purses his lips, and puts his hands up to block. Guess I have to haul out another avocado if that's the only thing I can get him to eat.

I use the polyvisol because it has iron, which he needs, especially given that I'm a vegetarian and I plan on raising him as one too (including fish and dairy though--just no meat). I had looked at the health food store for alternatives, but I could not find a children's forumula which includes iron.


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## Jilian (Jun 16, 2003)

I have a FTT little guy who recently turned 3. His growth sounds very much like your LO's. He was off the charts around 6 mos (we even use the BF infant charts) and hasn't been back on the charts since. We've tried all the fatty foods we could find: canned coconut milk, sweet potatoes with olive oil, avacado, nuts, nut butters, cheeses, whole milk, etc. He is finally just a hair away from the 1%, he is 24 lbs now @ 3 yrs. We reluctantly tried pediasure when he was 18ish mos and it did make a difference, but that stuff is expensive and really sugary! He was drinking 2-3 per day. I made the switch over to whole milk with carnation instant breakfast added in and he still drinks that at least once a day.

I don't think BM is to blame. My first and 3rd children were both chubby babies/toddlers. DS2 is just itty bitty. He does have a heart defect and was born pretty small (6lbs 4ozs and he was overdue). But his heart is fully repaired and his FTT stays. It is interesting that iron was mentioned because he dis have low iron for a while. We tried iron-rich foods and a cast iron pan and it stayed low so we supplement with an iron multi-vitamin and around the time we started with that is when he finally started gaining.

Also, our ped isn't super worried because DS seems to have stayed on his own curve all along. There were periods of plateaus but for the most part he's maintained his small curve.


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## OdinsMommy0409 (May 1, 2010)

I just wanted to add something that also helps get calories into my DS, especially in these busy toddler days. I keep a drawer of PlumTots and Revolution Foods organic pouch foods for DS. He will sometimes open the drawer and get one for me to open, but I also frequently hand them to him when he's running around the house or in his carseat. He loves these, and he can suck the food out the packet, which doesn't require him to sit down to eat or find the plate of food. Of course, my DS loves his purées (doesn't like most whole food bites), and the purées are actually quite tasty with no added sugar and organic produce.


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## lkmiscnet (Jan 12, 2009)

I'm just struggling to get him to eat much solids. Yesterday, he had about 4 oz of a jarred broccoli/zucchini puree, a few chunks of cantaloupe and banana, and maybe 3 Tbl of fresh avocado. He wouldn't eat lunch (nursed him to sleep). For dinner, he had about 4 oz of yogurt and again maybe 3 Tbl of avocado. I bought fish oil and added that to his yogurt as well. I also gave him maybe 2 Tbl of hummus, which he tried for the first time.

It just is not enough in the way of calories to support his activity level apparently.

I am also hard pressed to get him to drink much whole milk from a sippy cup. I have a straw sippy cup that he uses, but he takes a couple of sucks and that's it.

I don't know how I'm going to get any weight on him.

He has never shown any interest in what we eat. Never tried to pull food off our plates, etc.

This morning, he had just 2-3 tablespoons of full fat yogurt, to which I added 1 tsp ground flaxseed, 1 tsp of fish oil, 1/2 tsp of wheat germ, and his polyvisol with iron, and about 1 Tbl of avocado. He ended up crying because he was ready for his nap so he ended up filling up with BM again. So, I'll have to wait and try again at lunch time.

My DH thinks I shouldn't stress over this and he thinks our DS is fine. The dr. was not an alarmist, but she was concerned about his weight and mentioned her concern about a possible FTT diagnosis if he didn't put on more wt and that was all I needed to hear to turn into a worrier about this situation. I feel so helpless when he just won't eat much.

I guess that combined with how she said he is lagging behind and would be categorized at the 9 mo old level with where he is at now developmentally are all I needed to hear to make this sound serious enough to warrant concern. I just don't want to over react, but if the dr is concerned enough...

So, I don't know what to think. Either he is right where he needs to be and he will catch up or we need to intervene.

I went through a lot of stress when he was lagging behind in his motor skills back in the fall and he eventually caught up within a couple of months, so not sure if this will be a similar situation.

I'll have to check into those food pouches too. It's worth a shot.


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## klk197 (Apr 24, 2009)

My son was diagnosed with FTT. I now see it as a blessing. I exclusively BF at the time and had the extraordinary fortune of consulting with a lactation consultant/nutritionist. Because he had the FFT diagnosis, this 10 month-long consultation was fully covered by our insurance. Unlike our ped (who admitted to having little expertise in nutrition specifically--and I appreciate her candor), she could see his "big picture" of BF and make specific recommendations to supplement my own diet and to introduce solids to him that were unconventional, to say the least, yet supported by research. Her guidance took so much pressure off of me--I, too, experienced all of those thoughts of failure you mention--and I could refocus on putting her recommendations into practice and getting my son on the growing path. He was way off of the WHO chart, and now sits comfortably at the 10th percentile for weight. Like your son, my son seemed fine to most people--he's a ball of energy and charisma. Yet I suspected something was wrong but couldn't put my finger on it. I fed him on demand and his latch was examined and determined to be fine, so "obviously" he must be getting enough. With the LC/nutritionist we were able to pinpoint the problem and propose a solution. She was able to test my BM if necessary, but after the first 90 minute visit, she knew that wasn't the problem. Sometime along he stopped doing the nutritive suck and only did the comfort suck and therefore wasn't triggering a letdown and my supply had dropped dramatically. Its rare, but I wasn't the first case she has seen.

I write all this to say that you can drive yourself nuts trying a million pieces of advice--I know I did. I was extremely lucky to find the right expert with enough time to sit with the two of us and understand our situation and properly diagnose the problem and then create a plan of action. A LC/nutritionist could be exactly what you are looking for (IF one is near you!).


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## junipermoon (Nov 19, 2008)

did the ped give you a percentile for his head circumference? you might want to check that. if his head is in the normal range I wouldn't worry at all.

generally I think that if you are offering lots of fats, and your kid is old enough to eat solids but isn't into them, it's unlikely he is malnourished?

go luck hon. try not to get too crazed about it. I thought your approach of stirring olive oil into the veggies was a good idea. I had one off the charts baby who was only into green veggies, and that's what I did too-- I olive oil in the veggies, and he still accepted them.

hugs. it will be ok.


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## lkmiscnet (Jan 12, 2009)

I'm confused. I just charted his wt, ht and head circumference percentiles on the WHO charts and he is not off the charts and has no declines. Just a slow trend up.

I know that his ped used to mention corrected age and actual age and I think they were tracking both. I don't know what they are tracking now. I forgot to ask.

My general understanding is that you use corrected age for milestones, etc up until age 2.

I did use corrected age in my charting, so I subtracted a month from his actual age so it's comparing apples to full term babies, so to speak.

Length shows him in the 50th.
Wt is in the 3rd.
Head is in the 15th.

So, I'm now confused as to why his ped thinks he is on the verge of FTT. He is still on the charts, at least per my charting.

I guess it can't hurt to add more fat to his diet (I know it's recommended for the first 2 yrs), though I don't want to throw anything off kilter by doing so. Moderation is the key I suppose.

But, I just contacted the feeding clinic that the ped had written an Rx for 3 months ago (I wanted to take a wait and see approach knowing how poorly he did with PT) and now I'm wondering if I should even pursue that. I know my son will probably not eat on command in front of others. Then again, I just don't know. We just had the horrible PT experience, so I don't know what his temperment will be. He's a very sensitive boy.


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## pianojazzgirl (Apr 6, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lkmiscnet* 
I had looked at the health food store for alternatives, but I could not find a children's forumula which includes iron.

I'm pretty sure the kids version of Floradix has iron in it.


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## Tjej (Jan 22, 2009)

That's GREAT that he is on the chart and that he keeps growing. Maybe your doctor is using different charts. Bring yours in.

I do think that if your doctor is considering a FTT diagnosis you should go to the feeding clinic. It might help, it might not, but it can be a child safety issue (CPS type thing) for FTT, so I'd think it would be prudent to show that you are willing to do things to try to make a difference.

Also, if he's at the 3rd percentile for weight it is good that he is on the charts, but I don't think you have to worry about being "moderate". I mean, don't feed him a bunch of junk food, but good fat is good for you and for a little kid it is NOT bad for him AT ALL.

JMO.

Tjej


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## Devaskyla (Oct 5, 2003)

I can't say I'm surprised at all. Weight gain slows down a lot after they get mobile. I'm more surprised they'd consider a FTT diagnosis for a child who is gaining weight. It's not like he's not gaining or is losing. I'd get a second opinion personally. Just take him to a different dr, bring the growth charts with his weight/height/head circumference since birth, don't mention the FTT thing & see what's said. Your dr sounds like she is under the mistaken belief that height & weight need to be in a similar/same percentile.


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## RiverSky (Jun 26, 2005)

Can you try nursing him 2 more times a day, offering before he has asked or when he hasn't even asked?

I have read that nursing on demand (and only on demand) is actually a weaning technique. That is actually how I got my 2 year old to wean back before I knew as much as I knew now, by only nursing her when she asked to. Bit by bit, she asked less and less, and we stopped, before she was really, truly ready.

Anyway, I imagine that would be a good way to get more calories into your child and make you feel much better.


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## accountclosed2 (May 28, 2007)

But that's great! If he is following his curve (more or less), he certainly isn't failure to thrive!

Maybe it is just that his ped is using the old charts that are based on formula fed babies, and on which a lot of babies seem to drop percentiles in the second half year an onwards?

Just offer him healthy food (which includes lots of fats for a little one!), and relax. If you are relaxed and make food fun, it is more likely he will enjoy eating.

I would probably find another doctor and ask for a second opinion, bringing the charts, and do mention his prematurity!


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## tangledblue (Apr 5, 2008)

Agree with PP who said that height/weight don't need to be the same percentile--my child is always about 50% height and 5% weight. The developmental stuff might be a little more concerning, but I didn't walk until almost 18 mo. myself! If you're worried, though, trust your gut and revisit the early intervention idea.

Just wanted to throw in a few more food suggestions. My ped. advice was to concentrate on high value foods (like the avocado that your child likes), so I have been there! Also, I give her the polyvisol with iron because she was borderline anemic and also low iron can decrease appetite. I usually put the does in about 1/3 c. orange juice.
Other things she likes:
Pesto, with cheese and nuts
beans (often in form of salsa)
quesadilla with guacamole
tuna salad
salmon (also smoked salmon)
Ham, hamburger, grilled chicken
Tofu (marinated, curried)
String cheese (Haven't found a full fat one but you could try)
Eggs--I scramble them in a generous amount of butter
yogurt smoothies
(also various fruits/vegs, but I always give her at least one of the above at every meal--and serve it first when she's hungry)


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## tangledblue (Apr 5, 2008)

Also, agree with double checking head circ to make sure it's the same percentile.
Also, bread in olive oil is a favorite.


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## spmamma (Sep 2, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lkmiscnet* 
This morning, he had just 2-3 tablespoons of full fat yogurt, to which I added 1 tsp ground flaxseed, 1 tsp of fish oil, 1/2 tsp of wheat germ, and his polyvisol with iron, and about 1 Tbl of avocado. He ended up crying because he was ready for his nap so he ended up filling up with BM again. So, I'll have to wait and try again at lunch time.

Is it possible that his meals are timed too close to his naps? If he's tired, then he'll be far more reluctant to eat or try anything than if he's well rested. Also, have you tried doing less structured meals and instead doing more of a grazing approach where you offer snacks/small meals many times a day? Maybe he'd be more receptive to that? Are you only feeding him 3 meals or does he eat lots of small meals?

Have you tried mixing his supplemental stuff into the avocado then putting it back into the skin so you can scoop it out the way he likes it?

As to the pickiness, my DD was incredibly picky at that age too. I think teething had a lot to do with it, plus she's a sensitive kid and texture may have played a role as well.

Honestly, I just fed her the four or five healthy foods that she'd eat and kept offering (and gazillion times) the other stuff. Eventually, after she weaned at around 25 months, I started cutting back on her favorites and offering other stuff with them. Now at 3 I don't stress so much about what she's eating. Her tastes have expanded quite a bit... it's been a _very_ long road, though.

As to some of the other concerns you mentioned... DD didn't walk until she was 16 months and only had 2 words by her first birthday. She didn't start putting two words together until she was close to 25 months. It's always good to get things checked out if you're worried - you sound like a wonderful mama for looking into this stuff! I hope you get it resolved soon!


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## katmann (Oct 15, 2008)

I don't know if you eat fish, but you might try supplementing your diet or his with cod liver oil (sorry if someone's already suggested this, but I didn't see it in the other responses).

It has really healthy fat, and vitamin A and D. I think it also is a good source of iron. If he won't eat it, you could supplement with capsules, and it would at least give a little boost to your breastmilk. I take Nordic Naturals and I've found the cheapest prices on drugstore.com.

My LO likes beans, which have lots of nonheme iron (versus heme iron, found in meat). At first he wouldn't eat any other food but beans, and only black beans. They're a great protein source, too.

Good news on your charting - definitely worth taking to your doc. And for what it's worth, my LO, full term, now 19 mos, didn't walk till 16 mos.


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## lkmiscnet (Jan 12, 2009)

I don't think his ped feels that ht and wt need to be in the same percentile. She's just concerned about his lack of wt gain and how skinny he looks. Also, she commented on how you can see his ribs on his back. He happened to be standing in his diaper holding onto the stroller, so his arms were out in front. Not sure if that position made his ribs more obvious or not. He looks fine to me and my DH. We think he looks healthy, albeit he's just super skinny. He seems quite "sturdy". He does look small to me (I sometimes joke about his shrunken head), but we don't know yet if that's a genetic thing or if that has to do with not eating enough. He does look a lot smaller than other babies his age.

His ped breastfed 5 kids, so she's a big believer in that. She's a D.O. and not an M.D. so has a more holistic/whole body bent.

Coincidentally, on the mothering.com home page, in the ask an expert section, there is a question on BFing past the first year and it deals with a similar situation concerning low wt percentile...

I typically end up BFing every 3 hours. I've tried only doing one side and then trying to feed him. He never seems hungry, though he has always been a fussy baby. Generally, I do try to sit him down for 3 meals a day. He typically cries when I put him in his high chair and I have to give him a toy to distract him, which stops the crying. If one meal doesn't go so well, I wait maybe an hour and try again. So, I try to feed him more than 3 times a day.

Breakfast is always a challenge because he BFs first thing in the am (when I am not sure if he is up for the day or will go back to sleep) and he gets tired about 2-3 hrs after waking, and he's not hungry yet, so I usually strike out with solids. He gets fussy so I BF him and he usually gets his second wind and will stay up another couple of hours. Then, it is time for a nap, and I BF him to sleep. So, then I have to wait until early afternoon before I can attempt a meal. Most likely, he either didn't eat b-fast or what he didn't eat is leftover.

Today, he ate made maybe 3 oz of food total. He took maybe a bite or two and then would turn his head away and start to cry. He would not drink any milk and the avocado he loved was not welcomed today so much either, though I think I got about 3 Tbs in him in the afternoon. I can't imagine he took in enough calories today. He is SO active. And, just yesterday, he learned to walk with a push toy and wants to do that repeatedly. He tires US out!

He has regular BMs, though the consistency changes from day to day depending on what he has eaten.

I did buy a fish oil supplement which I add to his food, but again, he ate barely anything, so didn't get the full dosage. I also added some olive oil to his dinner of pureed garbanzo beans mixed with pureed sweet potato. He ate maybe 1-2 oz.

He has been teething for what seems like months now. The last tooth that came in was April. He has his hands in his mouth a lot and is drooling a lot, but he has been doing that for at least 3 months and nothing is coming through. The things he likes to chew on don't reach far enough back in his mouth to help. presuming its molars. The ped gave us some flavored plastic tongue depressor things earlier this year, but he generally won't chomp much on those.

So, not sure if this is a teething issue. Is he just being picky with foods he used to like (further confusing us) or is there some underlying issue?

It's just frustrating because I don't know what to think. Either this is just a phase and there is nothing to worry or it could be a major concern.

Aargh!


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## Tjej (Jan 22, 2009)

For the breakfast - you CAN start your day at the same time every day. Then you will KNOW how to space nursing with meals. It can be hard to implement, but it might really help you know how to attack the meal issue and your child could benefit from the regularity of the routine.

Just another idea of something that might help.

Tjej


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## flipsforfun (Jan 25, 2009)

To the OP, I read this and feel your pain and fear - it sounds like you have tried to do everything right and did your research. As the mom of a (vegan) 16 month old, I had to do mine too, and get plenty of criticism from well meaning but ignorant family members. I also have a hard time getting mine to eat enough fat, or even eat enough period. This seems to go in spurts. However, he is in the 45th percentile for weight and met all of his milestones just fine, and walked very early.

It does sound like your could use more fat in his diet, and possibly iron. Quinoa is an excellent source for protein and iron - I'll sometimes add a bit of curry and coconut milk to it, as well as broccoli and tofu. I use coconut milk wherever I can in both our foods, as he is still breastfeeding. It is high in healthy fat content (medium chain fatty acids, which don't really add to our hips) and DS needs all the fat he can get. Ditto for avocados, nut butters, coconut oil, . Here are a couple of recipes I'll use when DS goes into a non-eating spell:

Dad's Sneaky Pudding: http://www.navs-online.org/nutrition...lersgrowth.php

And my favorite:

My fat/protein shake recipe:
Chocolate almond milk
Coconut milk
Peanut butter / almond butter
½ avocado
Banana
Soy protein powder
Omega 3 oils (mix of flax, borage, evening primrose, etc)
Ice

Sorry for the no measurements - I just throw some in. Blend and serve - YUM!!! Even when he won't eat anything else, he'll drink this one!

And

Burrito:
Avocado
Mild salsa
Refried beans
Tofu sour cream
Cut up and steamed broccoli
Optional: soy chicken strips


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## junipermoon (Nov 19, 2008)

Great that his head circumference is on the charts! Great that he started walking with a push toy!

Have you tried dumping the high chair and feeding him on your lap? Some babies hate high chairs and that impacts things.

It really sounds like you are trying so hard. hugs to you. Try not to worry too too much!


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## lkmiscnet (Jan 12, 2009)

Actually, quinoa is something I have been feeding him for months now, though he had issues with the texture up until a few months ago.

This morning, I got him to eat an Earth's Best spinach/green pea medley, which he ate about 4 oz of the 6oz jar, along with some bites of avocado, some yogurt, applesauce and cantaloupe. He would not eat the yogurt and some other things I had initially tried until I got him to eat the jarred food then he was more receptive to the other stuff.

I really think this is an issue of him being picky and/or timing of BFing vs feeding solids. But...the mom in me wonders what if there is a problem and I don't do anything about it and how horrible would that be to not catch it early?

Without going into lots of detail (too long to post), from my pregnancy to now, it's been living on one giant roller coaster of things I've been told are concerning by the drs or his ped and I've just never been able to relax. If it's not one thing, it's another... Starting with being induced 5 weeks early when the drs thought he wasn't growing and that turned out to be a big mistake (I had been on bed rest since month 5), etc...Being a first time mom, I have no idea what to think other than to trust what I'm told. During and after his 3 wk NICU stay, I had latching issues, was told he may have reflux, a possible hernia that was being watched, then motor delays which they said needed OT (he progressed in his own time), possible sensory issues, not walking by now, not saying 3-5 words by now, etc...and all of these issues spaced out enough to make me crazy with worry from my pregnancy to now. So, that's why I'm stressed about yet another concern. Yet, he seems normal to my DH and me.

I did make the feeding clinic appt for a couple of weeks from now, but still feel like if we just left him alone, he would develop at his own pace, just like when we wasted our time with OT (just didn't work for his temperment). There is supposed to be a developmental ped, dietician, OT, and speech therapist all there to observe him. I just know (from his sensitive nature and stranger anxiety) that this is likely to not go well and he won't eat on command with all those strangers there looking at him and it's going to be a waste of time and costly too for us all to stand around while he cries with fear. His ped wrote the order for the clinic back in May, but I wanted to see how he progressed. I think I have played a part in his feeding issues because I don't think I gave him enough opportunities to play with finger foods because I would try and he wouldn't act ready, so I would wait (probably too long) to try again (books mentioned waiting a couple weeks). He now eats chunks of fruit, green beans, and teething biscuits with no issues as examples.

So, I don't know. Better to be safe than sorry or regret putting him through all this for stress for nothing...sigh.


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## EdnaMarie (Sep 9, 2006)

I just want to say the speaking thing, the 3 - 5 words, is an average, but if you look on MDC and all over the Internet it is FULL of children who spoke their first words at 18m+. I know my first child had nothing like that many words at 14 months. Maybe mama? She also walked at 13.5 months. NEITHER of my children, both of whom seem normal in every other regard, did the point-at-stuff thing. They wait for me to point. Like it's my job. LOL!

I was going to ask if you let him feed himself. My second won't be fed. She will refuse food and go hungry if offered on a spoon, though she will eat the same foods if I let her sit there with it.

The one thing here that I personally would worry about is that he doesn't support his weight when you hold him up. Sure, he's small, and he could be a late talker, but I thought supporting their weight was something they did quite young? Or is that just my kids?

Good luck, mama. It must be so nerve wracking. You have been, and are, doing everything you can, and that's all you can do. Don't beat yourself up, and "what if" never happened, so please don't let that ruin your state of mind. You're on it, you're a great mom, you are going to do it and he's going to do great!


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## lkmiscnet (Jan 12, 2009)

He does support his weight when I hold him up usually. I just think he didn't do it at the ped's office because he was so upset and just wanted me to hold him, so of course he didn't want to "perform" and even try to walk with my guiding him. He just kind of dragged his feet.

Again, I think that's my fault for not giving him opportunities to try. So many things to remember to do with them! I just can't stay on top of it...

My DH was the one that put him behind the push toy to see if he would walk the other night and who knew that our son would LOVE it. He goes back and forth with it. I thought it would take off in front of him and he would fall forward. I guess I didn't see the signs that he was ready to attempt that, even though he does a lot of cruising.


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## Tjej (Jan 22, 2009)

Are YOU anxious at these appointments? I find my kids have a 6th sense for my moods and will mirror them in an uncanny way at times.

OT didn't work before, can you try it again? Kids change. Needs change.

Can you just read some developmental books about kids on your own to get your own picture for what is truly average/within normal limits, and then you can feel more confident when getting Dr's opinions?

Tjej


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## Sharlla (Jul 14, 2005)

my kids tend to be high birth weight then drop to 5-10 per percentile. some babies are just lean. ds1 is 11 and 75 lbs. ds2 is 5 and 35 lbs and dd is 6 months and 14 lbs. i actually stopped taking ds2 to well baby visis because the dr was wanting me to bring him in weekly due to his low weight and i thought that it was absurd
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## EdnaMarie (Sep 9, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lkmiscnet* 
He does support his weight when I hold him up usually. I just think he didn't do it at the ped's office because he was so upset and just wanted me to hold him, so of course he didn't want to "perform" and even try to walk with my guiding him. He just kind of dragged his feet.

Again, I think that's my fault for not giving him opportunities to try. So many things to remember to do with them! I just can't stay on top of it...

My DH was the one that put him behind the push toy to see if he would walk the other night and who knew that our son would LOVE it. He goes back and forth with it. I thought it would take off in front of him and he would fall forward. I guess I didn't see the signs that he was ready to attempt that, even though he does a lot of cruising.

Oh, he cruises? In that case, frankly, he sounds totally normal to me except the weight. Totally. I know other kids that are very slim (though not under the 5th % to be honest).

The whole milestones thing around one year is hard because averages belie the fact that it is well within normal to walk any time between 9 months and 18 months of age, or start speaking any time between 9 and 24 months!


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## pauletoy (Aug 26, 2007)

I have a 2 yo (23 lbs and below the 10%) born 7 weeks early. He didn't start walking at all until 17 months. He had no words at all by one year. Our ped at about a year old started giving me a hard time about his weight. In our situation, I feel the doctor was pressuring us to keep up with some arbitrary guideline without taking into consideration prematurity and genetics.

We took ds to see a pediatric gastro. He told us there was nothing wrong with ds's weight. We haven't given it a second thought since then. Everytime we see our ped, she mentions ds's weight. I just ignore her.

My point is: I would seek a second opinion.


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## accountclosed2 (May 28, 2007)

Oh mama,

I'm sorry you've had such a rough time. We had a bit of that too, with an induction a week early (concerns with less fetal water and possible kidney or bladder problems in baby), baby was totally fine. Then breastfeeding issues, gaining issues, tiny baby, push for early solids etc.

I think what you really need is to step back. Look at the situation from a distance. Your child is following a curve. He isn't losing weight. He isn't dropping on the curve. He is tiny but fine! (And with the ribs, I've known at least 3 very skinny, but healthy babies, and ribs do show, they have skinny little legs, and DD didn't properly fit in newborn size cloth nappies until she was nearly 9 months old - skinny bottom!) I started calling DD "petite" at one point, as that is more positive.

The more you stress with food, the more he will resist, because meals are stressful to him too. In your shoes I would actually step back on the foods issue, breastfeed as often as possible, and just offer food whenever you eat. Let him join you at the table with no pressure to eat. Allow him to sit in your lap if he wants to, or in his chair, allow him to eat from your plate. Just make food pleasant. Sit down together and enjoy food. Show him that you like it. Let him play with the food.

My concern is, your child is growing now, so he must be eating what he needs (remember, the best thing is for a child to stay on his curve, not suddenly jump two curves down - or up!). But the more you stress around meals, the more problems may be arising in the future. The little boy I looked after, the one who was premature and very small, _lost_ quite a bit of weight soon before I started there when he was nearly two, and by then had severe food issues, aversions, couldn't touch a lot of food, was almost frightened of eating. It took almost a year to get him to enjoy eating - and show hunger even longer, he was over 3 1/2 when he came home from Kindy (pre school) and said "I'm hungry" the first time. He had never shown signs of hunger before that.

Do get a second opinion. I suspect you are right, your child is skinny but fine.


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## Kmama2 (Feb 4, 2009)

I didn't read all the posts but I just wanted to add that def you should eat more fat. If you can't stomach organic, grass fed meat. Drink whole milk, butter, coconut oil, oilve oil, fish oil/ fish/ eggs, cheese.
I just read this book and found it really helpful
http://www.ninaplanck.com/books.html
The one of mother and baby talks alot about the role of healthy fat in a childs diet and in a pregnant/ nursing mom's diet.
My son is in the 5% for weight and 2% for height. I add flax seed oil to use whole milk yogurt, butter or olive oil to add the cooked veggies/rice/pasta/beans that he eats. Lots of cheese.
But yes increasing your fat intake can increase the fat intake to your milk.


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## an_aurora (Jun 2, 2006)

I'm sorry, that's scary. I have had two FTT babies--my oldest was perfectly normal percentage-wise, my second DD was 16 pounds 14 oz at 13 months, and my son was 16 pounds 3.5 oz at a year. With my DD, her doctor was panicking and recommending ridiculous things (like weaning, and giving him Pediasure, adding butter & ice cream to everything, etc) but we switched pediatricians and found out she had food allergies. DS was the same way--born at 8lbs1oz, at 12 months he was 16 lbs 3.5 oz. His pedi was great, never panicked at all, just had him tested for food allergies, which he has tons of, and we're dealing with those.

There is no need to add unhealthy fats to his diet, but adding healthy ones is a good idea. Coconut oil/milk, olive oil, peanut or sunflower butter, flax seed oil or meal, avocado, and some whole milk products like cheese, cottage cheese, yogurt, etc are all healthy fats.


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## dividedsky (Jul 24, 2006)

are you offering him only pureed foods or foods with a smooth texture (avocado, banana, etc)? maybe he'd do well with more texture - my sons weren't interested in eating purees at that age. how about nutritious crackers, whole grain toast with butter? will he eat pasta? you can do whole wheat or they make these blends of whole wheat and beans, too - with butter and steamed veggies, or with a little milk and shredded cheese mixed in, or whatever... this is an easy meal that he may like better than the jars. quesadillas are fast and easy too, add chopped veggies or beans. for breakfast i make pancakes a LOT. so easy, 1 1/2 cup whole wheat flour, 1 3/4 cup whole milk, 2 eggs, 1 1/2 tsp baking powder, 1/2 tsp salt, a swig of agave, a dash of flaxseed meal. a smidge of real maple syrup may entice him to eat them - or add a little extra milk and they're thin like blinis - roll w/nut butter for a protein bomb. whole wheat bagel w/cream cheese (mix in chopped spinach if you want)?

just some ideas - treat yourself gently mama - you will get to the bottom of it!


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## julie128 (Jan 9, 2003)

My son wasn't premature, and he gained well the first year, but after one year, he still wasn't eating very much and he only gained 5 oz between 15 and 18 months. He still wouldn't eat a whole lot, but I started making smoothies for him with full fat yogurt, fruits, coconuts, either soy or cow milk, and some other kind of nut butter like peanut or almond butter. His weight went back up. I suggest giving your son lots of high fat foods, including meats and eggs. I was a vegan for 3 years and the diet ruined my health. I think you have to be too careful as a vegetarian/vegan to get the nutrients you need. Protein, iron, B vitamins, zinc, vitamin A are all easier to assimilate when they come from meats. Sorry! Please feel free to ignore if you are offended!

ETA: DS didn't walk unti he was a year and a half. Don't stress over the walking thing.


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## kriket (Nov 25, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *LadyCatherine185* 
It really rubs me the wrong way that your ped would suggest that you may have caused him brain damage by BF'ing and not forcing solids on him.









Forcing solids?! Paleese! Has your ped ever tried to force feed a toddler?
I have a similar approach to feeding as a few other mamas, we call it grazing. I will make DS a meal, which he just over turns on the table. Then while we are watching a movie or cleaning or whatever, I will keep the plate near me so DS can 'graze' when he comes by. If I can get three crackers and a chunk or avocado in him in a day I'm thrilled.

I see where you can be concerned, but you just can't make a person eat! Someone told me once there are two battles you are never going to win, when and what kids eat, and when they potty. You just have to give lots of opportunities with high quality foods!

Good luck! I will be stalking for other mamas ideas, I have a bird like eater too.


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## loraxc (Aug 14, 2003)

FWIW, I have known about 5 moms who had teeny tiny toddlers, and who stressed about it and were pressured like crazy about it by their peds, and all of them are older now and all of them are FINE. Some are still tiny and some are not. One of them did have undiagnosed food allergies, though. I would look into that.

(It seems weird to me that I have had so many good friends with tiny kids, btw. They were all BF babies and all lived in households where they ate a healthy, whole foods diet. I think maybe BF babies sometimes do really differently in terms of weight in toddlerhood.)

ETA that I agree about trying food with texture. Neither of my kids were at all interested in purees at that age. BTW, I did have a very skinny baby for a while and I swear what brought his weight up was Stonyfield Farms full-fat vanilla yogurt.


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## intunement (Jul 23, 2009)

didn't have time to read all the other posts but I feel for you Mama! Don't let a doctor's label make you feel bad as a mom. We all do our best all the time, and you can pull through this with your little one. He has not failed, and neither have you.

I would suggest trying to up his fatty food intake. Some things that helped us through a period of weight loss for my little one were: avocado, coconut milk (not the watered down kind with sugar added - the pure cream with lots of great medium chain fats which are healthy and hard to find elsewhere, great mixed with yogurt too), mixing milled flax powder into anything he would eat or sprinkling it on, drizzling olive oil on veges or pasta, and cashew and almond butter, cream cheese. He didn't really like lots of foods, but we found that he loved puffed wheat cereal (the cheap kind in a bag rather than a box) so we would put a puff on a bite of anything else we wanted him to eat. We basically spent all our time with him trying to get him to eat, and I nursed all night long up until he was about 27 months old (2-5 times per night depending on his interest). I know it is hard, but you can do it! Whenever you are giving him food, think about how you can up the calories with a bit of olive oil, flax powder, cream cheese, coconut milk, etc.


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## Dazedstella (Dec 21, 2008)

I posted a couple of days ago but apparently the computer ate my thoughts... Anyway, quickly, I don't know much to help you with the medical side of things but I had a couple of quick thoughts about the ways that I get healthy fats into my toddler.

She HATED eggs (after loving them as an infant) and I finally realized one day when I was eating a poached egg on toast and she wanted some that she didn't like the eggs fully cooked. I was scrambling them or frying them hard or hard boiling them because I didn't want to give her runny yolks yet but she ate almost my entire piece of toast soaked in egg yolk from my poached egg. She still won't eat very much of the whites but one of her favorite breakfasts is poached egg on buttered toast where you let the bread get all yolk-y and then she gets the benefits of the yolk. It totally depends on your comfort level with soft-cooked eggs.

Also I make oatmeal alot for her and I mix it with butter and cream or whole milk or whole milk yogurt. I should also do things like put ground flax in but I always forget.

Anyway- I don't know if either of these suggestions help I just wanted to throw them out there.







mama.


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## Jen-o (Jun 16, 2009)

My DD is just 20 lbs at 23 months old, and our doctor is still a little worried. She started gaining slower at 6 months and has been under the 3% curve for awhile. We were referred to a ped. and he said that as long as she is gaining and pooping that we shouldn't be worried.
Have you tried many chunkier foods? at 14 months, DD was eating cubes of cheese, cut up soft fruit (like ripe pears, peaches, bananas etc) and soft meats like chicken, tuna. DD refused to eat purees, so she didn't really start to eat anything significant until she had 6 teeth. She didn't get her molars until 20 months. Maybe your child has an aversion to the texture of purees. It's worth a try. IT's really amazing what they can chew/ mash in their mouth with only 6 teeth. well done pasta and soft toast are also good for getting carbs in your LO. We also feed DD cream soups with crackers crushed up in it. Just some ideas.


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## cheryllynn (Feb 20, 2010)

First, I feel for you going through this. Having a nephew that just would not eat, I know how sad/frustrated/worried my sister was trying to get food into her son who just refused.

When I started foods with my now 15 mo old dd, I bought organic butter, organic ghee and organic coconut oil. I make sure she gets some of this on something each day. She won't eat her pureed beets without butter.

My dd is 85% height and 25% weight and only gained 1lb 4 ounces from 12 to 15 months. However, my dd is walking/jogging, so I know she is burning off calories.

There is a Carlson's Children's DHA supplement
http://www.nordicnaturals.com/en/Pro...8/?ProdID=1442
I'd use these and cut them open and put the liquid in the food.


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## EdnaMarie (Sep 9, 2006)

Is it bad that I let my kids just eat butter? Not the three-year-old--it's served on bread--but the baby. I don't think that's bad. They need it!


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## MrsBone (Apr 20, 2004)

What are your reasons for vegetarianism? Is it just the killing of animals in general, or does it have to do with the inhumane ways that animals are killed? I ask because, you could always buy some organic grass fed beef or liver and hide that in stuff. Either that, or you could make bone broths out of cow bones. They are full of minerals and nutrients that your little one needs. I would also really try and get some eggs into him (preferably free range organic). He's going to get some vitamins and minerals from veggies and fruits, but I would really try to focus on getting those good fats into his body. Organic, whole milk, cook with grass fed or organic butter, coconut oil, etc. His brain needs it!


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## lkmiscnet (Jan 12, 2009)

I have been adding coconut oil and/or olive oil to his meals, as well as a fish oil supplement. I also add ground flaxseed to his morning breakfast of full fat yogurt with applesauce.

He does eat soft textured foods like avocado. In fact, I just started cutting the avocado into chunks because he seems to like to self feed them.

I think I misunderstood "pureed" to be smooth foods, like hummus, which I have actually been feeding him as well. So, he is beyond pureed textures, though I still have a frozen stash of purees to finish up.

I have also tried some whole wheat spiral pasta (which he enjoyed feeding to ME)! He did try a few himself.

He still loves cantaloupe chunks and watermelon (though I try to not let him eat too much melon since it's mostly water).

Oh, and dining out recently, I learned that he loves salmon, as I fed him some chunks of mine. So, I need to start making that a couple of times a week.

So, I think with the added fats, he should hopefully add some more weight.

I am still struggling to get him to drink up whole milk from his sippy cup. He drinks water, so I tried to do a 50/50 mix of water and milk. He did seem to take a few more sips, but he's not guzzling it like I had hoped.

I have also tried scrambling eggs and making them hardboiled and he doesn't seem to like the texture. He puts it in his mouth and then promptly spits it out or throws it on the floor. I took some of the scrambled egg and put tiny pieces into a mash I made of beans and sweet potato and was able to disguise it enough to get him to eat some, but it took a while.

Usually I have to resort to some trickery to get him to finish a meal. For example, he'll eat applesauce, so I take a spoonful of the mash that I want him to eat and then pretend to dip it into the applesauce bowl or I actually have to dip it (yuck, what a conconction!). Then I alternate with a spoonful of all applesauce. Sigh...some meals are taking an hour, but I do get him to finish what I'm serving or close to it. I know not to force it, though I do try to get him to take "one more bite", and if he does, he usually will take a few more, so I keep going and we repeat the cycle until I know he won't take one more bite.

It doesn't help that I'm not much of a cook (I can do it, but it doesn't come naturally to me as it does my own mom). It just takes so much time and I don't want to spend 2 hours in the kitchen prepping, cooking and then cleaning, while my son is wide awake and ready for interaction (not to mention having to keep an eye on him). I struggle daily with what to make for dinner for my DH and son.

I eat only organic foods and don't like to use "convenience" foods like frozen dinners, so most meals have to be made from scratch. I don't know how I'm going to manage when our DS is older. I have no idea how my mom was able to work sometimes double shifts when we were growing up, raise two kids, and get meals on the table (main dish, side and dessert to boot)! Hmm...no wonder Hamburger Helper was popular back then!

I'm all for just one big main dish for dinner with no sides, no dessert. It's just too much to juggle otherwise (at least for me).

My DS is not going to have fond memories of any of my cooking, that's for sure. It's not that it tastes bad, but it's not like my mom used to do. Sigh...


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## JBaxter (May 1, 2005)

Have tried sweet potato fries? you can make them or buy them ( organic) frozen. I also make pancakes w/ pumpkin & a dash of cinnamon. Butter them and add just a little maple syrup. I make batch and freeze some for later.


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## JanineRivera (Dec 13, 2009)

Ok ... I am not sure how much my words are going to resonate but I just have put it out there and you can take it or leave it depending on how you feel. I just can't understand how weighing 18lbs at 14 months is on the verge of FTT!!! My daughter was nowhere near the recommended 25lbs at that age and in fact she just turned two and probably weighs only 22 or 23 lbs.

I just really get the sense that there is not a real threat for FTT here. I think that your son just has his own way of growing and developing. What is your sense as his mother?? Do you get the feeling that there is something wrong? Does he interact with you in his own way? Does he play and get interested in the things and people around him? Does he observe?

I have no professional background so this is all my opinion but I get the feeling that your worrying and stressing out about food may only turn him off further and I wonder if you would be able to relax a little and trust your sons process. I often wonder what we would do if we didn't take our kids to the doctor early on ... would we be doing the same things? worried so much? would our children grow just fine? I believe that modern medicine has its place but I also believe that it can be truly detrimental in undermining our own intuition and relationship with our own bodies as well as our children.

I am writing these things just as a reminder to trust. Sit quietly and listen to your inner voice. I do hope that you find a solution that works for you and your son.

Best of luck,
Janine


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## accountclosed2 (May 28, 2007)

Just to let you know, we just had the Well Child nurse here today, and she weighed DD, who with clothes weighed 11.92 kg (26.2 lbs). She's now halfway between the 15th and 50th percentiles







!

At 15 months, as I've just checked in her baby book, she was 8.53 kg (18.7 lbs) and was just below the 15th percentile. And by then NOBODY was worried about her anymore, she was obviously growing, slowly and consistently at the bottom of her chart.

As a fellow mother of a small child (and one that *WAS* at one point diagnosed as FTT), from your description (and unless you haven't told us that your son used to be 50th percentile and has since *dropped down* to around the 15th or slightly below), I can't see how your child is FTT.

As for him not walking yet or other motor development issues, check out this page at WHO:

http://www.who.int/childgrowth/stand.../en/index.html

Download "Percentile and means in days and months". I find that so useful when people indicate your child is late at something. Only 50% of healthy children walk by 12 months. I think that at least gives some perspective.

For what it is worth, DD ate much less at that age (not counting breastmilk). And she eats great now, only thing the nurse could worry about was that DD's currently refusing beans, but she said not to worry anyway, that it would sort itself out.

I do think, like pp, that your son will know that you are trying to trick him into eating more than he wants, and that you are worried about food. And it is likely to be stressing him to. He may very well react in the only way he can to gain control: By refusing to eat.

Point is, I think your son is probably gaining just as well as he should, and eating what he needs, and what you really need is to stop stressing about it. Try to make mealtimes fun times instead. Model good eating habits, show him you enjoy food, sit down together as a family, talk about pleasant things, listen to classical music or something like it, light candles, set the table together... Make food enjoyable. He might enjoy helping you prepare a meal (in any way he can). If you can get him to think food is great and mealtimes are FUN, most of the battle is won. And it won't be a battle then, anyway.


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## dividedsky (Jul 24, 2006)

regarding the egg thing... how about french toast? that is so easy to make and i bet he'd like it. mix up eggs, milk, a splash of vanilla, a smidge of sweetener (i use agave), soak whole wheat bread in it until soggy and cook on a griddle. try it!!!!!


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## lkmiscnet (Jan 12, 2009)

My mother's instinct is that he is fine. He seems healthy in every way, other than being skinny and being able to see his back ribs when his arms are outstretched, which seems like that would be the case given that he would be pulling his skin taut in that position anyway. It's not like you can see his ribs when he's standing with his arms down.

Now, my big decision is whether to keep his feeding clinic appt on Monday or cancel it. I'm stressed about it and really think it's going to be a waste of everyone's time (and our money to boot), but then there's that little voice that says "What if...". Or perhaps it would be interesting to see what they all say. Sigh...

Thanks for the WHO chart link. That was very helpful!

If not for his ped, I would have been happily going along in life not thinking there was anything to worry about since this is a first time experience for me and I wouldn't have known any better anywya. And, there probably isn't anything to worry about. Still, she's the "expert" and raised 5 kids...

Double sigh...

Thanks for all the food ideas. I'm going to try them.


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## aet.tea (Aug 14, 2009)

Just stumbled on this thread. Sounds like my DD is exactly the same age as your DS (almost 15 mo but was 3.5 wks early so about 14mo adjusted). At last check (about a month ago) she was still just shy of 15 lbs.

We have a very cool pedi who used to run the PICU, so he has seen a lot of very sick kids and is not too concerned with variations of normal. He has not been alarmist at all about our having a very petite daughter. That said, he has definitely encouraged us to fortify her diet with good fats and has kind of playfully charged us with getting her to gain a pound a month (not happening).

We have also had to see the renal specialists (she was born with only one kidney) who are more concerned about the slow weight gain. There does not seem to be any renal cause for it, though, so they have put it back in the pedi's court. Our next appointment is next week.

DD is also a VERY modest and choosy eater and I don't think she is eating any more than your DS. I am not at all confident that she is gaining weight any more rapidly and am a bit apprehensive about next week's appointment.

Developmentally I think she is where your DS is - she just started pulling to a stand in the last few weeks and cruising in the last week or so. We have therapists coming to see her twice a month through Early Intervention, and she's making good progress these days.

Anyway, I think we could probably find a lot in common and a lot to talk about. . . more than I have time to type right now.

What I'm currently doing to get calories into my picky eater:
- goat milk (3 parts) mixed with coconut milk (1 part). She drinks a couple of ounces of this at each meal and a little bit in between. She drinks more of it out of a regular (small) cup than a sippy cup. If I bring it with us on walks she drinks even more.
- pancakes made with coconut milk and almond butter. Makes a great "on the go" snack; sometimes I keep her in the sling so I can just keep pushing bites of these pancakes in her mouth
- scrambled egg yolk with coconut milk - this is what she eats for breakfast almost every day. Separate the yolk from the white for more calories/fat in a smaller serving
- cod liver oil, flax oil, coconut oil, etc.

Good luck with everything! May we both have happy healthy toddlers.


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## Nanasi (Sep 11, 2009)

I read this post a while back and it stuck with me. Then at the library the other day, a book about vitamin B12 deficiency caught my eye. Apparently, in babies B12 deficiency can often result in delayed development and "failure to thrive." Please, read up on this and consider getting both yourself and the baby's levels of B12 tested. I'm also suspecting that my the dementia my father-in-law and grandmother are suffering from could be partly due to low B12.

The book was, "Could it be B12?: An epidemic of misdiagnoses" (http://www.amazon.com/Could-Be-B12-E...4075494&sr=8-1).


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## kdtmom2be (Aug 26, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *dividedsky* 
are you offering him only pureed foods or foods with a smooth texture (avocado, banana, etc)? maybe he'd do well with more texture

Trying to catch up on this thread with interest as we have also been referred to a specialist for FTT. For now they are simply monitoring his weight, he is on track or ahead developmentally, just skinny (and a little short actually).

What I wanted to add regarding food is that my daughter had HUGE texture issues and didn't really eat much solids until about 14 months. That is when I figured out what some of her issues were. She would never eat off a metal spoon but would happily eat off of a plastic spoon. She didn't like soft foods and to this day has eaten 6 bananas in her 3.5yrs and just recently started to occassionally eat mashed potatoes.

What she would eat, and eat a lot of, was crunchy stuff. SO, she ate crackers, banana chips, dry cereals, etc. If it was crunchy she would eat it. She LOVES corn nuts... not exactly my first choice in snack foods for a toddler... just giving the example. The crunchier the better. Might be something to try.

Also, it seems odd to me that one person is telling you that he is delayed by 6 months and another is telling you that he's just fine. I would get a third opinion on the skill development if i were you.


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## mamadelbosque (Feb 6, 2007)

I haven't read the whole thread, so forgive me if I'm repeating what other posters have said... Have you tried just giving bits of food that he can self-feed? Thats how both my boys have always done solids - we never did purees with either one, just let them shove stuff in their mouths.

That said... 3-4 words by a YEAR?!?! Seriously, my DS1 didn't have 3-4 words till he was *TWO*! And, some kids walk late - everybody knows that. DS2 is 13 months and still mostly crawling - he can take a few steps and does so occasionally, but 95% of the time he just crawls. As for the 'point out eyes/ears/mouth/etc' stuff? Meh, I never did that stuff w/ my boys and I don't think ds1 figured it out till closer to 18-24 months. DS2 is 13 months and probably wouldn't have a clue.









Oh, and for the weight... ds1 is 29#s. He's 3.5. DS2 is ~19 months. He's 13 months. So, your ds doesn't sound *that* far off!!


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## catters (Nov 20, 2007)

I haven't read the whole thread, but wanted to commiserate. This sounds just like DD, who was a week "late" weighed a good 7.5 lbs, but has continually slipped off the weight chart, despite growing taller and taller. My pediatrician thinks she is just fine as long as she is active, alert, eating (which she DOES A LOT!) and exhibits all other signs of health. She is still nursing as well (15 months old, nowhere near twenty lbs. It has been a source of anxiety for me as well. I hear you. All I can say is, trust your instincts. If you think he's not thriving, then maybe have him seen by a specialist.


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## EdnaMarie (Sep 9, 2006)

Quote:

Still, she's the "expert" and raised 5 kids...
She raised her kids. She hasn't raised yours.


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## honeybee (Mar 12, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lkmiscnet* 
I'm confused. I just charted his wt, ht and head circumference percentiles on the WHO charts and he is not off the charts and has no declines. Just a slow trend up.

I know that his ped used to mention corrected age and actual age and I think they were tracking both. I don't know what they are tracking now. I forgot to ask.

My general understanding is that you use corrected age for milestones, etc up until age 2.

I did use corrected age in my charting, so I subtracted a month from his actual age so it's comparing apples to full term babies, so to speak.

Length shows him in the 50th.
Wt is in the 3rd.
Head is in the 15th.

So, I'm now confused as to why his ped thinks he is on the verge of FTT. He is still on the charts, at least per my charting.

I guess it can't hurt to add more fat to his diet (I know it's recommended for the first 2 yrs), though I don't want to throw anything off kilter by doing so. Moderation is the key I suppose.

But, I just contacted the feeding clinic that the ped had written an Rx for 3 months ago (I wanted to take a wait and see approach knowing how poorly he did with PT) and now I'm wondering if I should even pursue that. I know my son will probably not eat on command in front of others. Then again, I just don't know. We just had the horrible PT experience, so I don't know what his temperment will be. He's a very sensitive boy.

Here is a good link to an article talking about the CDC moving to the WHO charts, and the differences between them. Many fewer children will be diagnosed as FTT when using the charts of normal growth... ie, growth of breastfed babies in good environments, as opposed to charts based on formula fed infants.

http://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/preview/mmwr...cid=rr5909a1_w

But it takes a while for medical practice to catch up to the research and new policies. I would bring this information and the WHO charts with you to your ped's office. My ds2 never ate a single bite of solid food until he was 15 months old. And, yes, he had stopped gaining weight, for about a year. His case was a little different in that he was a large baby... so he slipped from 99th percentile to 50th percentile on the "old" (still currently used) CDC charts. Luckily, I knew enough not to worry too much or try to force solids on him. We did a blood test to check iron/lead, and allergy issues, but other than that, just watched him. He has oral motor issues and was late to speak and had articulation issues. He also later developed several food sensitivities, and I think all those issues were at play as to why he did not like solid foods. But once he was ready, it was like a light switch went off, and he just started eating anything and everything.

I truly believe that if your child is "picky" there is usually a good reason. And if there is a genuine case of FTT, I don't understand why docs don't look at underlying health causes instead of going right to the nutrition/feeding issue in breastfed babies... well, I do know... it's because they get ZERO EDUCATION on normal growth and behavior for breastfed babies and toddlers, so it is easy to blame the breastmilk/nutrition. I have a friend whose baby was constantly borderline FTT and they kept trying to tell her nursing was a culprit. She persisted nursing anyways. Finally, about a year later, her son was diagnosed with a kidney issue. After getting the appropriate medical help, he is now thriving and has completely caught up developmentally and is happily enjoying preschool.

I'm so sorry you've been led to believe that something is wrong with YOUR milk and that by bf your baby you somehow malnourished him because you weren't eating perfectly. Women in impoverished third world countries still usually produce adequate milk for their babies... they just may starve themselves in the process.


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## lkmiscnet (Jan 12, 2009)

I'm still "struggling" with getting him to eat much. Some days, he might have just a few bites from a toddler spoon and that's it and his poop again is the consistency of a breastfed baby. I am flabbergasted at how he can manage his level of activity on how little he eats without losing weight. He hasn't been losing, but he is more active now since his last ped appt, so I don't know what the next weigh in will hold in 2 months. Certainly not the 2-3lb gain I had hoped for...

That said, I am forcing myself to relax as best I can, knowing that he knows his body best and whether he is hungry or not. Can a toddler be hungry and not know the sensation or how to express it? I would think he would cry if he were still hungry.

I will say that he seems to be very picky as just when I am almost ready to give up on a meal, I pull out a back up jar of some green organic veggie baby food (which he loves so long as it's a fresh jar) and he will eat it. Go figure! I usually have about 3-4 things out for him at any one meal.

I am trying to give him food throughout the day. The problem is that some of it can't be out for too long before going bad and I can't add healthy fats to the "finger" foods". He still tosses the small chunks of cheese. He has been eating steamed green peas though and teething biscuits. He loves the organic puffs, though they are lacking in any nutrition.

I am able to add coconut oil or olive oil, ground flax, and fish oil to the purees, if I can get him to eat them. It's just hit or miss.

A friend of mine has a same age child who eats well, but has not been putting on weight and he was not drinking much whole milk. She just decided to wean him a couple of weeks ago, as she felt that whole dairy milk had more fat in it than what she could provide through BM. She said weaning made a huge difference in her son's intake of full fat dairy milk and he drinks it up now.

It is something that I am considering because I do think that breastfeeding is displacing my son's intake of solid foods and he also only takes a few sips of organic whole milk or coconut milk. It's also something that I can't keep out all day because it goes bad. So, after he takes a few sips, I put it in the fridge and try again later.

I do have a frozen stock of 9 months - 1year old BM that would carry him through about 4 months, but have been waiting to thaw it because without him drinking a lot, it goes to waste. It also has excess lipase so has that off smell and soapy taste, though he didn't seem to mind it when I tried it on him a few months ago. I have always been concerned that I didn't have enough fat in my BM from the start because when pumping, there was only a very, very thin layer of cream on top in the storage bag. So, it could be that I just can't give him the necessary fats that he needs.

Just a thought...

I am truly thankful to everyone that has responded. I had no idea that so many would answer.

Thanks!


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## LadyCatherine185 (Aug 12, 2008)

I would absolutely not wean him to cow's milk unless he was eating a wide variety of solids. Right now he is getting the perfect balance of nutrition from your breastmilk. Human milk was made for human babies, cow's milk for baby cows. He may start eating more solids if you cut back on nursing a little bit, but I wouldn't cut back a lot so that your supply stays.

Oh, and about the not much fat on top thing-- I never had much fat on top of my milk either, but my DS has always been in the 75-95% for weight, so I don't think your breastmilk is lacking. Also, I don't think that the milk you have frozen is any good anymore, as from what I have read it only lasts for 3-6 months in the freezer.


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## lkmiscnet (Jan 12, 2009)

I am also worried about BM supply issues as well. I started the weaning process in June and would sometimes go 6-7 hours without BFing during the day and 4-5 hours at night. We had a setback (accident with our DS) and I ended up having to nurse him every 2 hours or so because he regressed and seemed to need it more during that time so I backed off on trying to wean.

He just doesn't seem to be swallowing (less than 5 min duration) a lot when he nurses, so I am worried that my supply may have been impacted when I tried to wean. Then again, he detaches when he wants and doesn't appear to be hungry afterwards.

The BM I have is stashed in a stand alone deep freeze. It supposedly keeps BM for more than 6 mo. I don't know if a year is too long or not. Aside from the taste, I just hope the nutrients have remained. Pumping was a stressful ordeal and I would hope that 9 months of it did not go to waste! I stopped pumping 6 mo ago.


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## Curlyfry7 (Jun 20, 2007)

I have a small DD, who at just over 20 months old weighs 19lbs 15oz, which I don't think is even on the charts (the CDC ones, that is) She is roughly 25% for height and her head is somewhere 50-75%, which is supposed to be the biggest indicator of FTT.

I think she only eats about as much as your DS does, at least some of the time. We still BF on demand in the day, I have nightweaned as we are planning to TTC soon. My ped gives me somewhat of a hard time when we have appointments. I did let them do bloodwork at her 15 month visit, which was....normal! Not a shock to me. My MIL is only about 5 ft tall and probably weighs about 90lbs. I myself have very small bones, am about 5' 6" and weigh 120, and DH is also on the smaller side. DD is meeting/exceeding every milestone.

I try to encourage DD to eat good protein each day-sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. I have found the best way to get her to eat is to ignore her-that may sound bad, but I serve out the food-the same thing everyone else is eating, and then just let her do her thing. Last night she dumped blueberries in her soup and painted it on the table. Tonight she gobbled down whole wheat rotini with butter, salt, pepper and parmesan cheese, some pieces of chicken thighs, and some broccoli slaw tossed with soy sauce, rice vinegar, sesame oil, and garlic. I don't stress over what she eats each day because we're bfing, and I know that she will get what she needs.

Could you maybe try for 1-2 weeks just offering stuff to him and not worrying about what he eats or doesn't? Since you have said he's very sensitive, perhaps he really is picking up on your anxiety. I know anytime I really try to get my DD to eat something, that is a guarantee that she will NOT so much as touch it to her lips, LOL.

Good luck mama!


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## Amila (Apr 4, 2006)

I am sorry to have not read all the posts, but just wanted to add that my DD was 19 pounds from age 1 until age 2, and nobody ever batted an eye! She is just little...in fact now at age 4, she weighs the same as my 2 year old DS! 32 pounds each...


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## BMG580 (Jun 19, 2007)

My good friend has a child with serious food allergies, lack of ability to gain weight and refusal of most foods were the biggest signs at first. Her son just turned five and he graduated from Neocate (prescription formula) and now has some sort of super high calorie, nutrient packed kind of creamy fruit drink that looks packaged like a juice box. Could you see if your son would try and drink something like that once a day? Ask your pedi about it, I think they are prescription like the Neocate formula.

Good luck!


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