# Dd does not like to be rocked to sleep anymore



## nylecoj (Apr 24, 2007)

Dd is 6 mos old as of today.









Lately, when I rock her for naps or night time she gets very angry/fussy and cries and arches her back. After several minutes of crying in my arms and wrestling me, she will calm down and go to sleep, however I'm looking for some alternatives that will help her drift off without the fight.

She's *very* easily stimulated. Me laying with her does not work at all - she just plays with her feet and flails around.

Thoughts?


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## alegna (Jan 14, 2003)

Will she nurse to sleep?

-Angela


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## LynnS6 (Mar 30, 2005)

Ds was like this. He also wouldn't nurse to sleep after about 4 months. Or more accurately, he'd start to nurse, nurse until the milk came down and then scream in frustration. It took me 2 weeks of this to get a pacifier. He wanted to suck, but it was too stimulating to have to deal with the milk. He preferred to sleep in his crib, with his pacifier, with his blanket pulled over his head. I felt like an AP failure.

I would recommend the book "The Highly Sensitive Child". If I'd had this book when ds was little, I would have created a little 'tent' over his bed to reduce the stimulation (and my worry - I never liked the blanket over the head. I worried obsessively about SIDS).

So no, it's not you, it's her. It's OK. It's not personal. Ds is very loving and attached. Just not cuddly. (His idea of 'cuddling' on the bed is to lie down on dh's pillow a good 2 feet away from me. Dd's idea is to lay on top of me!)


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## nylecoj (Apr 24, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *alegna* 
Will she nurse to sleep?

-Angela

Rarely these days. Sometimes she gets very frantic and grabby and wants to nurse (even if she's just eaten) so I feed her anyway and she'll suck a few minutes and then want to bounce around/play some more.

Other times she will nurse until she's drowsy and then pull off and snuggle to sleep, but that's becoming more and more infrequent.


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## lolar2 (Nov 8, 2005)

Our postpartum doula joked that DS needs a straitjacket and blindfold to take naps. She's right, but she forgot the earplugs.

Last night he was very overtired, so I held him so tightly my arms ached and sort of facing towards me, held his arms down, sat on the edge of the bed, and bounced WAY up and down on the bed. Turns out he does still want to be rocked to sleep, but it has to be much more vigorous than usual.

Then this morning after his 6 am feeding, I put him down wide awake in his cradle while I went to the bathroom, intending to come back and either pick him up or rock him in his cradle to help him get back to sleep. But when I came back he had put himself back to sleep. Whatever!

Sorry this was rambly and not too helpful.


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## Manfa (May 27, 2007)

One of my nephews was like this. Do you rock her cradle style (as if going to nurse) or over your shoulder? The health visitor suggested shoulder as oppsed to cradle style for my nephew because the other way was akin to leaving a bowl of food just out of reach of a dog.... even if the dog wasn;t particularly hungry. The smell of it or just knowing it was there would drive him crazy. Over the shoulder worked and rocking back and to with him swaddled. This also helps if they're a bit overstimulated. I think that sometimes the soothing and rocking we do serves only to stimulate them MORE when all they wantr to do is shut out all sight and sound.... it dsnt make u a faiklure"!!!!


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## nylecoj (Apr 24, 2007)

I do tend to do cradle style because she startles so easily when I transfer her to a laying down position, but I can try to modify again and see what happens.

I wonder if I should just put her in her crib for a few minutes and give her some alone time? Obviously I won't let her cry it out or anything, but maybe she needs some space to decompress?


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## nylecoj (Apr 24, 2007)

So I tried:

Rocking her over the shoulder
Reading to her quietly in her crib, in a dark room, with a white noise maker
Singing to her

Everything stimulated her more.

I ended up rocking her to sleep but she sleeps with her eyes open sometimes and everytime I put her down she woke up crying.

Begin off topic rant:

I am so frustrated today. It's hot here in Sac and my dh is annoying me about "getting a job".

/End rant.


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## twopinknoblue (Feb 22, 2007)

I don't have any advice about your original post, DD1 loved to be rocked until she was nearly 2, DD2 has hated being rocked from day 1, so I say, just do what works for you.

As for "getting a job", you can politely remind DH that you have a "job", you may not be earning an income, but you most certainly have "a job". Unless there are serious financial burdens, I say, stay home if it's what makes you happy. Your DD needs you.


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## PlayaMama (Apr 1, 2007)

boy, sounds tough!

one time, i was bouncing my ds and it wasn't working, finally i was so frustrated i started doing these exaggerated-big-deep-knee-bend kind of bounces and he fell right to sleep. i so hate it when they wake up right when you are laying them down.

what about a stroller? i used the sling for about two years and then we got a jogging stroller, it's nice because if he goes to sleep i can just pull it in the house and he naps in there. she's a lot younger but it might work?


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## Charming Opal (Jan 15, 2007)

My DD did the exact same thing at that age! I worked out two solutions, nursing her to sleep, and wearing her down to sleep in a sling. The baby carrier works as a swaddling mechanism which calms DD down and prevents her from flailing/arching her back. Good luck mama!


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## kulam123 (May 30, 2006)

Ds is 6 months as well and does the exact same thing.

One thing that has been working for us recently is patting him on the back while he is on his stomach. If he isn't nursed to sleep, and is still groggy when I put him down, he immediately flips over to his tummy. Usually he will start to fuss and that's when I would pick him up and rock him. I've been starting to pat him on the back, quick at first, and then slowing it down gradually. He goes right to sleep...with much less fuss. Well, not RIGHT to sleep, sometimes I have to pat for a good 5 minutes.

Good luck mama.


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## Jane Plane (Jan 30, 2007)

We walked E to sleep for about 8 months, and it got increasingly difficult for him to give in to sleep. We ended up laying him in his crib with a sleepytime cd playing, and keeping our hand lightly on his tummy. He struggled with it the first night, (cried







but we were right there with him) but fell asleep really quickly and had far fewer wakings.

He wouldn't nurse to sleep after age 6 weeks or so.


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## Manfa (May 27, 2007)

Have you tried putting him down to sleep earlier? Maybe he's just too tired and too cranky and thats part of the reason he's fighting it?


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## mightymoo (Dec 6, 2003)

DS has always fought sleep. We used to rock him until that stopped working, laying down didn't work, nursing didn't work. Honestly, we went through a long phase where there was no way to get him to sleep without him screaming.

One technique that seemed to work was to make the room pitch black. Remove ALL stimulation and have some white noise in the background. I would lay down with him in the bed and usually I could get him to sleep without him screaming too much.


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