# Can I be Angry for a bit??



## Spookygirl (Sep 14, 2002)

I haven't posted here a lot, but I have been reading here a lot lately. I am suffering from a missed miscarriage. Unlike some of the women here, I made the decision to go ahead with a D&C.

So, we found out on Wednesday of last week about all of this, so does my Dr. see me, talk to me, or anything, no. He has the u/s technician tell me what is going on. And if she would have mentioned god's plan one more time I would have had to punch her. I am angry that she assumed that everyone is Xtian, and even if I was, did she think that would comfort me?? So, I go in on Thursday to my Dr's office, only to be told that it's best if I wait to miscarry naturally. I am sure this is correct, if I were showing any signs of miscarriage, but I am not. No spotting, no cramping, and my damn HCG levels are still rather high. They don't seem to realize my body doesn't get that I am not pg. Can I be angry that they would just force this decision on me, without discussion, because I am in too much shock to argue? So I call on Friday to demand a D&C I can't wait weeks, and weeks with this in me, I just can't. The nurse says Dr is planning on scheduling me for surgery on Tuesday. Ummm, okay, no one told me that! Can I be angry that they don't feel the need to keep me informed of decisions they are making about my body? Today is Monday, a nurse called me today to tell me my Medi-cal isn't active yet, and the temporary eligibility won't cover this procedure. The earliest now, if I can get ahold of my worker and get this straightened out, is Wednesday. Can I be angry that I now have to wait longer, and duke it out with Medi-cal to have this taken care of???

All of this anger, forced on top of the grief of losing this potential little life. It's just too much, I am done now. But I can't rest, because I have to get my daughter to the doctor, she has a sinus infection, and is soo miserable, and I can't even do anything for her.

Thanks for listening, I feel a tiny bit better just writing it down.


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## TappinMamma (Dec 24, 2002)

Mamma I am so sad you have to go through this. I suffered a missed miscarriage, or at least thats what they called it. My baby died at 15 weeks and at 20 weeks I still had no idea. My body still thought I was pregnant too. Because I was so far along I still had deliver my sweet Elijah. And they sent me home that night instead of just letting me go to the hospital then. Like I got any sleep that night









I hope you get your Medi-cal straightened out so you can go on with your grieving. Sending all positive thoughts your way.


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## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

I'm sorry. This is hard enough without those kinda problems on top of it.


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## Still_Snarky (Dec 23, 2004)

Wow mama, you've been through the mill. I'm so sorry.


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## Slackermom (Jul 23, 2003)

I'm so sorry. You shouldn't have to deal with all that nonsense. A m/c is difficult enough without all these complications!

Hugs to you.


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## Aurora (May 1, 2002)

I am so very sorry!


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## Kerrie (Jul 23, 2003)

I am so sorry that you are going through all this. Of course, you can be angry. I hope all gets worked out asap.







s


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## babycarrier (Apr 2, 2004)

I am so sorry you are going through this. My miscarriage was missed also and the waiting is horrible. Best wishes on getting this sorted out quickly and getting the care you deserve.


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## kama'aina mama (Nov 19, 2001)

Hell yes you can be angry. I'm angry and it isn't even happening to me! It's hard to pick out which specific aspect of your situation is the most bullshittiest.... possibly any onething would be bearable... but all of them together? And you still riding the pregnancy hormone rollercoaster? How much this all sucks is off the chart.

Hell yes be angry.


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## HaveWool~Will Felt (Apr 26, 2004)

Waiting to hear an update from you mama. I hope all is as best as it can be right now for you.

love and peace to you....

~J


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## Spookygirl (Sep 14, 2002)

Well, I am now safely on the otherside of my D&C. I had it done on Wednesday morning, and physically am doing well. Some light bleeding, but honestly I have had menstrual cycles that were worse then this.

Thank you all for your kind words, I really appreciate the support. I will continue lurking around here, as I am sure the emotional baggage that goes along with this still hasn't been checked to it's final destination, and I appreciate being able to learn from all of your experiences.


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## JessicaS (Nov 18, 2001)

Lurk or post all you want, it can take awhile to start to cope with such a loss.







(no one here will ask you about getting over it.)

I do have to say, that Dr is utter shit. Fire him and never see him again. It is completely and utterly inappropiate for him to have a TECH tell you about your loss.

That is complete BULLCRAP. Techs are not trained to explain a medical problem or devastating loss nor are they qualified to diagnose and I would send him the nastiest note EVER to explain how utterly inappropiate, unprofessional, rude, heartless and not to mention what a WORTHLESS Dr he is to have someone UNTRAINED to do HIS JOB.

Then because he has someone UNTRAINED to do HIS JOB they don't even know what to explain to you or to even explain about a D&C being scheduled. BULLCRAP! I would complain to the hospital about the care you received, as that is some of the WORST I have ever heard!!!

HECK YA be angry! That is horrid!!


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## HaveWool~Will Felt (Apr 26, 2004)

Spookygirl said:


> Well, I am now safely on the otherside of my D&C. I had it done on Wednesday morning, and physically am doing well. Some light bleeding, but honestly I have had menstrual cycles that were worse then this. QUOTE]
> 
> I am pleased to hear that the d&c went ok. Take care of you and be gentle with yourself. SLEEP, REST, take it easy...


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## darsmama (Jul 23, 2004)

Beckie, I'm glad you were able to get the d&c as you needed.







's to you, and many warm thoughts being sent your way.

love
Katie


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