# Can I implement Dr Jay Gordon night weaning when my baby is 8mo?



## sora (Oct 7, 2006)

I read Dr Jay gordon recommends night weaning for older babies like 1yr old and up. But somehow can I modify it and implement it even if my baby is only 8mo old? I desperately need sleep and mine wakes up so often like every half an hour to two hours throughout the night. Can I not feed him between 11pm to 3 or 4 instead of his method of not feeding from 11 to 6. I have started solids and he eats really well. What do you think of his reason of objecting to night weaning younger babies? It's because babies younger than one year old can get hungry during the night? If I try not to feed him during certain hours at night such as 12-4am, will he get confused about why he gets fed before and after but not during that time. Can my baby go without breastmilk for 4 hours at night? Thank you.


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## allisonrose (Oct 22, 2004)

I don't know all the answers to your questions but wanted to mention that perhaps The No Cry Sleep Solution is something to look into (it's a book - author is Pantley).

Also for some reason, I'm thinking 8 months is a classic time for a sleep regression....


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## dogretro (Jun 17, 2008)

My daughter just turned 8 mos old yesterday & because she is biting me all the time, I have switched her to bottles of pumped milk & she is now basically nightweaning herself. My older daughter, I nightweaned her at 10 mos old. Both slept in our bed at during and after the weaning. I do not believe that older babies need food during the night. I do believe that they may get thirsty & that they like to eat during the night, but not that they truly need to eat multiple times. With dd1, I would offer her a bottle of water. If she was thirsty, she would drink some & go back to sleep. Eventually, she stopped waking up & would only do so rarely if thirsty. DD2 is being offered a bottle of pumped milk just in case she is hungry b/c she is younger. At one of the feedings last night, she chose to take her pacifier instead of the bottle & went back to sleep. As you wean, they learn to eat more during the day in order to get thru the night. I see nothing wrong w/ one or two feedings per night at 8 mos, but every 1-2 hours is way more than necessary, imo.


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## dogretro (Jun 17, 2008)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *allisonrose*
> 
> Also for some reason, I'm thinking 8 months is a classic time for a sleep regression....


You are correct, it is.


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## mamazee (Jan 5, 2003)

I would not nightwean a baby that age. At such a young age, a baby might be nursing so often at night to try to increase your milk supply. Or, if you're away during the day, he might be reverse cycling (nursing a lot at night because you aren't available during the day).


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## sosurreal09 (Nov 20, 2009)

babies can not comprehend sleep training at that age...which essentially night weaning is. I would never attempt to nightwean before 18 m/o personally. Then they can comprehend it and you can explain it better.

If you want to do the hole milk in a bottle instead of nursing thing you could...I don't think its about food...well maybe, she is still young. Either way babies have needs besides just food. She needs to connect to you and feel comforted at night too you know.

i think i spelled whole wrong i mean it like the hole milk in the bottle thing...but that's not right either right? o man i hate spelling I did not mean cows milk! o man IDK what the heck spelling of hole it is but i mean it like the whole night she was up screaming KWIM?


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## mamazee (Jan 5, 2003)

Whole milk like cow's milk? If babies that age aren't having breast milk, they should be having formula, not cow's milk.


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## PatioGardener (Aug 11, 2007)

Quote:
Originally Posted by *allisonrose* 


> Also for some reason, I'm thinking 8 months is a classic time for a sleep regression....


Oh my, yes! We are in the middle of it right now. Thank goodness MDC is here to remind me that it is normal! Longing for some







!


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## sosurreal09 (Nov 20, 2009)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *mamazee*
> 
> Whole milk like cow's milk? If babies that age aren't having breast milk, they should be having formula, not cow's milk.


sorry thought it was common sense, to clarify: expressed breast milk


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## sapphire_chan (May 2, 2005)

My experience was that from about 8 months to a year, my dd did almost all of her nursing at night. I would not night wean any infant in that age range unless I was prepared to wean completely and accept anything that might result from no longer having the option to nurse when it came to the picky toddler years, through any illness, or even just when my kid had a bump or was sad.

Nursing would have to be pretty horrible and several solutions would've had to fail before I'd risk it.


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## Eeyore35 (Aug 2, 2009)

Yeah..8 months is right about hwen sleep regression happens...my daughter had been sleeping htru hte night since 3 motnhs, and suddney, she was up having a bottle several times a night. Her doctor told me she didnt' need it for nutrition, so i did cut back. I'd get up, give her her pacifier, and hse'd usually go back to sleep. She still got one or 2 bottles at night, becasue I knew she was hungry...they are so busy crawling & pl\uiling up, trying new things all day, they do'nt eat as much. I tred ot py attention to how many bottles she had during hte day, so I had some idea whether she should be hungry at night,. I also knew her hungry cry, of course, but had just been getting up, and giving her a bottle without thinking about it.

now, I wasn't able to nurse, so can't really advise on that, but one concern mught be if you cut back to much at night, and she's too busy too nurse as much during the day, could that effect your suply? Others can prolly tell you if that would be a concern.

This stage isn't forever...the worst was over by about 10 months.


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## Maluhia (Jun 24, 2007)

No, I would never do such a thing as their appetite increases at this age (hence the sleep regression), they are under a year old (way too young to wean), introducing formula or cows milk could both cause great gastrointestinal unrest (less sleep) adn this classic sleep regression age passes eventually. If you need a few particular hours a night you can have your DH comfort the waking child but be prepared for MORE nursing after the big break.


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## Shaki (Mar 15, 2006)

18 months is a better age for night weaning. If it's any comfort I have vague memories of rough nights around that time (8 months) and disagreements with my DH about whether we should "DO SOMETHING" (sleep training, nightweaning) ultimately we did nothing and all those nights of interrupted sleep seem to have gone by in the blink of an eye. When you think about the life of a child it's really only a short time that the night waking is a part of parenting (I know it doesn't feel that way when you are right in the thick if it!). I found that for me if I could change my perception from "This is a problem I need to solve" to "This is a normal part of babyhood, it doesn't need to be fixed" I was able to be more relaxed and although it didn't get me more sleep it relieved some stress--does that make sense?


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## Hannah32 (Dec 23, 2009)

I'll be the one to say something different. If you really need the sleep, as in to preserve your sanity, have your hubby take the baby and give him some solids during one night awakening. That's what we do and we're doing fine with the nursing. It's not perfect breastfeeding protocol, but it's good enough. I'm becoming more and more a fan of "good enough" every day I parent.


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## sosurreal09 (Nov 20, 2009)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Hannah32*
> 
> I'll be the one to say something different. If you really need the sleep, as in to preserve your sanity, have your hubby take the baby and give him some solids during one night awakening. That's what we do and we're doing fine with the nursing. It's not perfect breastfeeding protocol, but it's good enough. I'm becoming more and more a fan of "good enough" every day I parent.


I dont advise this really b/c shes so young...like what do you even do? here's some puree apples, now go to sleep. I don't get it. My DD didnt even "start solids" until she was 9.5 m/o. I don't think replacing breast milk at that age is a good thing, sorry....

like someone else said if you want 5hrs straight sleep maybe DH can handle a wake up and she will hopefully sleep another couple hours or w/e. There is not too much you can do at that age. some babies just STTN earlier than others and some don't STTN until they are 3. a lot depends on the child.

Also with all the added mobility the calories at night are most likely required. I would never night wean at least before a year. Even kelly mom and LLL will tell you some babies really need to nurse at night until 1 y/o.


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## EmTheWife (May 28, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *sora*
> 
> I read Dr Jay gordon recommends night weaning for older babies like 1yr old and up. But somehow can I modify it and implement it even if my baby is only 8mo old? I desperately need sleep and mine wakes up so often like every half an hour to two hours throughout the night. Can I not feed him between 11pm to 3 or 4 instead of his method of not feeding from 11 to 6....Can my baby go without breastmilk for 4 hours at night? Thank you.


hugs mama.

I too will be a different voice and say go for it. You are not describing true night weaning, just limited feeds, which should not be a problem for an 8 mo old baby. He CAN go 4 hrs between feeds and probably even does during the daytime sometimes - it's no different for him nutritionally to go 4 hrs at night. Yes, nursing is comforting, and he may need comfort, but Daddy comforting is good for him too, though he might protest the change at first. Additionally, it is important for you to be somewhat rested so that you can be a healthy mother for you child, so that you can think rationally, so that you can act correctly in case of emergency, so you can be emotionally present the other 20 hours of the day.

To quote the "father" of AP, "If it's not working for everyone in the family, it's not working" (paraphrased from the Sears' Baby Book).

I hope you get some sleep soon!


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## Hannah32 (Dec 23, 2009)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *sosurreal09*
> 
> Quote:
> 
> ...


Yeah, my hubby gives him some pureed food, maybe avocado, and then he goes back to sleep. Works for us. I usually still nurse once in the middle of the night.

It's fine if you don't think it's a good idea, you don't have to do it if it's not going to work for you. But the OP said that she desperately needed sleep. And sometimes, "oh you just have to put up with it," isn't the most helpful advice.

Hope you get some sleep, OP! Remember, sometimes good enough is enough.


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## sapphire_chan (May 2, 2005)

Just to make sure, your LO is in the same bed as you, right? You aren't having to get up everytime she wants to eat?


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## Nova0929 (Jan 13, 2009)

I will be another voice to say that you are doing a wonderful job, mama, and imho -- and in the professional wisdom of our naturopath, homebirthing, natural parenting, holistic pediatrician -- babies can definitely go 4 hours or more at this age without food. Snuggling with daddy/other mommy, a pacifier, a finger in the mouth should be fine. If baby really resists and you think she is truly hungry, a bottle of pumped breast milk, some bit of pureed food, even (gasp!) a bottle of formula is fine. Baby will certainly protest at first, but give it a few days. Babies are so flexible and resilient if we allow them to be.

My son is now 27 months old and we are expecting another baby in March, and I am already planning that things will be different from the first time (we nightweaned a la Jay Gordon at 16 months). If we cut down on the number of times we nurse during the night, I don't think the new baby will receive any less of our love and bonding and connection .... we will be offering nighttime love and bonding and connection, just without breastfeeding every 1-2 hours. And maybe baby will stay asleep if not receiving any breastfeeding at that time, just like my son did when I nightweaned him at 16 months.

Hugs, mama. Taking care of yourself is taking care of your baby.


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## LittleBirdy (Apr 28, 2008)

Quote:



> Originally Posted by *Nova0929*
> 
> Hugs, mama. Taking care of yourself is taking care of your baby.


DS is only 5 months old so I can't contribute from a BTDT perspective, but as to this, yeah! My midwives are really big on self care - the health (and sanity!) of the mother has a big impact on the health of the baby. And it doesn't hurt to try, you know? If the baby does not respond well after a few nights you can always go back to the way it was.

Good old Dr. Sears talks a lot about honoring your partner with his share of nighttime parenting specifically to avoid burnout by a nursing mother. And his mantra is, if you resent it, change it. Do what is right for yourself and your family. You are doing a great job!


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## Kiwiontheloose (Dec 17, 2009)

I think that putting a time frame on it, at night, just gets confusing for the baby, and you might end up with an awake baby for a good 2-3hrs at night while you try and get him back to sleep..(we tried the same thing at 10mths and it didn't work).

What did work for us was trying to work on different ways of getting DD to fall asleep. Lying next to her rubbing her back, walking with Daddy, patting her bottom (tummy sleeper), rocking, cuddling, stroking forhead, singing....etc etc.

Then I would usually glance at the clock the next waking after a nursing and if it was less than about 1,5-2hrs ago I would *try* one of our other methods (usually the easier ones - cuddle, backrub, saying shhh, shhh) eg - if she woke at 2.30am and I last nursed her at 1am I'd try something other than nursing.... If that didn't work I'd go ahead and nurse, but sometimes it did work. And the amount of times it worked started increasing. It didn't really buy me any extra sleep in the short term, but after a few months my Hubby was able to do some of the cuddling etc and this meant I could start sleeping in 2-3hr chucks. At around 13/14mths we changed the family bed so DD slept next to hubby. He would try and soothe her with every waking and only pass her over to me for milk if she wouldn't settle (and took her back once she was done - it was bliss - I got so much sleep!). This reduced the night nursing down to about 2x a night.

She is now 19mths and weaned completely - she went off the taste of my milk when I was in 2nd trimester of preg, and still wakes up about 2x a night for a quick cuddle or a drink of water. So night-weaning doesn't neccessarily mean sleeping through the night.

Hope that helps/


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## JamieB (Apr 1, 2008)

Here is my story. I was nursing my nine month old DS1 throughout the night every night and then one night he slept all night. That kinda made me think he might not need to eat at night. The next night when he woke up I rocked him instead of nursing him and he was asleep within minutes without one single tear. He slept the rest of the night and within a week he was STTN. No tears and it did not affect our nursing relationship. I decided to do the same thing with DS2 around the same age. Started rocking him at night instead of nursing. He didn't sttn for a while after that but all he needed was to be tucked back in during the night. He sleeps through the night now though, at 14 months. I consider this pretty good for some of the stories I read on here. Probably just luck I realize.

OP there is no rule that says you have to nurse your baby every time she wakes at night. Actually, I really believe that just makes things harder in the long run. Your baby is probably just going through natural sleep cycles and might not necessarily be hungry. I wouldn't put a time limit on nursing or anything like that. Just try rocking baby back to sleep or patting or walking with her. If she is truly hungry, she will let it be known and you then you can feed her. This might actually be a lot less gentle than actually nightweaning an older baby that is set in their ways.


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## karen1968 (Oct 2, 2006)

If you are side-lying nursing or sleep nursing, you might consider that your little one is just snacking, and not getting a good feed. Consider getting up, or at least sitting up, and making sure s/he is getting a good feed - listen to the swallow pattern, use breast compression, facial stroking, etc., to keep him eating until he seems actually full. By doing tis, you will fill his tummy and he might sleep longer between wakings.

I personally got less sleep with side-lie nursing because of the way I'd need to be positioned (large breasts, small baby). When I got up and gave DS a good feed, I'd be awake for ~30 minutes, but then we'd both sleep 3+ hours before the next feed. During a "sleep regression", though, all bets are off!

HTH!


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