# How old were you when you got your first period? How old was your daughter?



## journeymom (Apr 2, 2002)

Some of the comments here made me wonder if it's true what "they" say, that girls are getting their periods earlier than they used to. If so, that's kind of sad and scary!

So how old were you when you got first menarch?

(If you have a daughter old enough) How old was your daughter?


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## Bladestar5 (Jan 5, 2003)

My mom and sister were 15 and I was 14. My older sister was jealous that I was younger than she was, but was happy that I got to endure the torture too. So we were all late bloomers...
I remember in health class I got some of the questions wrong about how many days till the next period if girl x got it on this day... and my (male) health teacher was really understanding when I told him I hadn't gotten it yet. He was also the gym teacher, so when I got it the first time, he was sympathetic about me constantly running to the locker room in paranoya that the pad was leaking!! He had a daughter, so he was REALLY COOL!!


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## mirlee (Jul 30, 2002)

I was nearly 16. My baby sister, 11 years younger than me, had hers when she was about 12.

I think girls do get them earlier these dys. I heard once that it had some relation to the way our food is processed, but that was just somethung heard. I can't back that up.


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## *~*SewHappyNow*~* (Sep 25, 2002)

I was 12 I think. And didn't have another for about a year after that.

I have heard that when a girl's body reaches a certain percentage of body fat this is what triggers the beginning of menses. When you consider we are becoming more and more overweight at younger and younger an age, it makes sense that girls are starting to menstruate earlier.

I too have also heard the link to hormones used in raising animals for consumption link.


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## peggy (Nov 19, 2001)

I was 13 and my DD was also 13


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## MamaOui (Aug 9, 2002)

I was 11 and I think my sister was 11 or 12. I don't have any daughters though.


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## latinmom (Nov 20, 2001)

I was 12 and dd was 13.


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## barbara (Feb 13, 2002)

I was 11, my sister was 12. I have 3 dds one started at 11 like me, another at 12 and the other one at 14. Go figure!









-b


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## EnviroBecca (Jun 5, 2002)

I was 12, whereas my mom had started at 14. BUT she lost a lot of weight right after getting all the other signs of puberty, so probably she was about to get her period when her body fat got so much lower. (Not only is there a threshhold amount of body fat for adequate estrogen production, but a rapid weight loss can stop estrogen production temporarily, even in women who were previously menstruating. My mom went from overweight to normal weight.)

In addition to the increase in overweight children, I've heard some other factors for the drop in menarcheal age:

*improved nutrition. This was in the first half of the 20th century, when the average age dropped from 17 to 13 or something like that. The decline has been slower since then.

*hormones in meat and milk.

*xenoestrogens in the environment. These are byproducts of industrial processes and are also blamed for lowered sperm counts in men and genital deformities in male animals such as frogs.

*chemicals in hair treatments, particularly straighteners used by African-Americans, which are absorbed thru the skin. I'm sorry I don't remember the details about this--I heard it on NPR, I think--but said treatments were still on the market as of last fall.

*lack of dietary fiber. Studies since the 1960s had shown that vegetarian girls menstruate later; a recent study looked at diet in more detail and linked the difference to fiber.


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## Arduinna (May 30, 2002)

personally I don't buy the story that girls are getting them earlier. I was 13, dd is 13 and hasn't gotten hers yet. My mom was 10 I think?? I remember her telling me that she got it really early.


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## Greenfrogs (Jan 18, 2002)

I agree with you arduinna. I think we just talk about it more. My mom was 10, I was 14 and my sister was 14/15. Some girls in my neighborhood were earlier others were latter.


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## DaryLLL (Aug 12, 2002)

Me: 12. My sis: 12. Dd#1: 12. Dd#2: 12.

Juliet was not yet 14 and already marriage material, and that play was written in the mid 17th century. Her mother was already a mother at that age, she told her.


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## EnviroBecca (Jun 5, 2002)

Remember, the average across a population says absolutely nothing about the value of one data point. One girl born in 1980 may have started at an older age than one girl born in 1960, but the AVERAGE age for girls born in 1980 may still be younger than the average for girls born in 1960; the two individuals are just at different points on the curve for their cohort. (Can you tell I am a data analyst?







)

Another thing to remember is that half of your daughter's genes come from her dad's family, who may have a different puberty timetable than yours, and she might "take after" anyone in the family, due to recessive genes and so on.








T One thing that puzzles me (being interested in puberty and how it influences people's life experiences, and thus tending to start conversations about it w/friends) is that almost all women remember their first period vividly and often recall the exact date, whereas about half of men have no particular recollection of their first ejaculation, whether it was via wet dream or masturbation. I can understand why the date is so memorable for menstruation: because of the emphasis on tracking your cycle. But it seems like ejaculation, the "now I'm a man!" event, would be memorable as an experience.







: They seem to be better able to remember when their voices changed or they started shaving or other more "public" (one hopes!) aspects of puberty, whereas for women menarche seems to be the most memorable step. Any idea why that is?


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## *~*SewHappyNow*~* (Sep 25, 2002)

Quote:

almost all women remember their first period vividly and often recall the exact date, whereas about half of men have no particular recollection of their first ejaculation, whether it was via wet dream or masturbation
My guess is that this event for boys may have some feelings of guilt or shame associated with it since it is a more of a sexual response. Of course its natural, but society has its taboos that cause these inappropriate feelings. I know my mother believes masturbation is a horrible, sinful thing. She was offended by that Sinfeld episode about masturbation.

Also, I'm not male, but I am going to guess that it isn't the sort of thing you talk to the guys at school about, unlike the way young girls may share the milestone of menstruation more openly with their girlfriends.

Also, I am not sure if fathers or mothers prepare young boys for this event in the same way mothers do with their daughters.

The other reason may just be that men are horrible with dates anyhow









I actually do not recall how old I was exactly, or the date or anything. I think I was in 7th grade and it was fall maybe, but I coulln't say for sure. So whats that say about me? hmmm


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## Arduinna (May 30, 2002)

half of all women remember the date?? That's amazing to me. I had to think back and remember how old I was. I have no idea of the date, or season for that matter.


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## lilyka (Nov 20, 2001)

I was 11. My girls aren't old enough yet. my friend who has teenage dd swears that she can already see the hormones shifting in my oldest. or as she puts it "the 2-3 years of PMS before the storm". lovely!


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## DaryLLL (Aug 12, 2002)

Quote:

_Originally posted by Lea_
*. I know my mother believes masturbation is a horrible, sinful thing. She was offended by that Sinfeld episode about masturbation.
*
Woah, now that was a Freudian slip, or did you do it on purpose?









I don't remember my first period either. I do remember my best friend's tho. She got hers in 6th grade and I went to the nurse with her. I was soooo jealous. I was ridiculously obsessed about getting mine. I used to write in my diary about it. My sister is only 15 months younger than me and I was so anxious she would get hers first! My girls did not get obsessed about getting theirs. They are homeschooled tho, and maybe didn't have all the peer pressure?


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## lilyka (Nov 20, 2001)

Was I the only person who didn't want thier period. i was so embarrassed about the whole thing. Of course mine started heavy and lasting for 7 or more days. I still dohn't want those.
I didn't tell a soul I had gotten it and made every attempt to not let anyone know. I was still in elementry school.


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## *~*SewHappyNow*~* (Sep 25, 2002)

I was addressing EnviroBecca's question about male's and nocturnal emmissions/masturbation etc..

Quote:

whereas about half of men have no particular recollection of their first ejaculation, whether it was via wet dream or masturbation
I did mean to type masturbation, not menstruation.. they do look strangely similar, though don't they?


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## hahamommy (Dec 18, 2001)

My mom doesn't remember when she got hers







I was 14, MIL was 14 and I'm hoping DD will be around that age, too... I appreciate the homeschooling comment ~ I'm glad she'll be with me when it happens and if she really doesn't feel like being out and about, she doesn't have to! Hannah at 6.5 and even Hayden at 4.5, have been fully educated about *bleeding time* and I think they mourn the loss of my *eggs that come out every month because they didn't become babies* I've also given Hannah the speil I so wish I had recieved ~ you've got all of your *potential* babies in your body already, you need to be responsible for them your whole life long, not just when you're a grown up and ready to have a real baby.

~diana


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## BinahYeteirah (Oct 15, 2002)

bs"d

I *think* I was 14 when I got my period...ummm...maybe I was 13... DD isn't going to be getting her periods anytime soon. I don't know what I'd do with a PMSing/teething 7 mo!

I can't remember anything about my first period.

OT:

I do remeber that I used to bleed for three weeks straight, then start again in a week after it stopped. Also had horrible cramps, same as my mother (she had a hysterectomy due to fibroids). I think I have alot of internal negative associations about my period due to this. I went to the my ob/gyn, he just said it was normal. Then he put me on birth control at 14 yo. He said I would out grow it. I went off bc at 21; my periods were much less annoying and only came every couple months. Maybe I did outgrow it?

Now I can't wait for my period. Haven't had it since I got pregnant with dd.


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## Momalea (Dec 29, 2002)

I was 11 when mine started, my dd is waaaay too young (2 yo). I don't know about my mother or sister but I know I was younger than both of them. My mom was pretty shocked that mine started (because hers had started much later in her teens).

Another menarche fact for trivial persuit-living at high elevations increases the age of menarche. For instance, in Colorado (the Mile High State) the average age of menarche is higher than all the other states.


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## Marg of Arabia (Nov 19, 2001)

13 when I got mine and my dd was 14.......


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## journeymom (Apr 2, 2002)

whoa, Momalea, that's pretty interesting. I wonder why that is.

I was 13 y.o. It was March 13! And for the longest time my periods came on the 13th or 14th of every month.

Ds was born on the 21st and my periods have been coming on the 20th or 21st since I started up again. I think that's pretty cool.

Dd is 8 y.o. I do wonder what's going on in her body right now. She seems pretty emotionally stable and reasonable these days. And she's still such a little girl! I do NOT want these days to go by too quick! Maybe because my teenage years were so tumultuous with my mother.

Anyway, dd has had one tiny little black head right in the middle of her cheeck for almost a year now... (Irishmommy's post "Is she too young for this?" got me thinking about this whole issue.)


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## midnight mom (Feb 4, 2003)

I was 11 years old and my dd was 10!! We had just read a book about periods and puberty the week before it happened, so she knew exactly what was going on, plus I've always been open about mine with her since she was little.

Ten years is quite young, and I wish she could have gotten later, but what can you do? NOTHING.


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## Mommasgirls (Nov 5, 2002)

My DH and I were discussing this this past weekend. I was 10,my mom was 11 and his sister was 12. That means that my oldest could have her's as early as 10







. That's way too soon for this mommy-she's 5.


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## sixkids35 (Jan 22, 2002)

I was 11, a month and a half shy of 12th birthday. My daughter who is now 10 (10/92) started in July when she was 9. It is so sad. She is developed like a 12-13 yo but still immature about certain things. I often am confused on how to "treat" her. Her periods are painful. She doesn't swallow pills very good. I recently bought Orange eseential oils and it seems to help some. Anyone else have any ideas on natural remedies to help her with her painful periods that hurt her the first two-three days. First couple days before she starts she has headaches. I had painful periods but was much older than her. I tolerated them as best as I could. She is weepy and very emotional too before and during.


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## journeymom (Apr 2, 2002)

Oh, that's just not fair! I'm sorry she has to go through that. That's just exactly what I'm concerned about.

I don't have any advice to give except continue to be sympathetic and understanding. Sixkids, did your periods get any less painful as you got older?


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## sixkids35 (Jan 22, 2002)

Journeymom, yes my periods did get less painful as I got older.


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## EnviroBecca (Jun 5, 2002)

Sixkids, encourage exercise during PMS; getting the blood moving helps "decongest" the pelvic area and prevent cramping later. Exercise will help during the period too, but if she doesn't feel like it, another helpful treatment is lying flat on the back with legs raised. Eating more fiber and less salt and meat is supposed to help cramps, too. And have you tried Red Raspberry Leaf tea?

The headaches probably are caused by plummeting estrogen. Eating more soy foods might help with that. In general, with headaches it can be very helpful to pay attention to whether your body is craving a particular food or drink. My headaches often are alleviated by spaghetti, for instance; I don't know why, but I assume it's fulfilling some unmet need of my brain chemistry. Be careful how you talk to your daughter about food cravings, tho, because she needs to understand the distinction between "what my body needs to feel better" and "what I would like to eat"!


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## CincoDeMama (Dec 9, 2001)

I was 11- & in the 6th grade. My dd is 10- & in the 4th and she doesn't have hers yet. But we're ready for the magical day


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## indiegirl (Apr 15, 2002)

Christmas Eve, 7th Grade...I was 13. Didn't tell anyone for about six months. I used to take the bus to get pads by myself. I left a pad wrapper out one day and my step mom (monster at the time), asked if I started. I said yes. She said "oh. Congratulations."

I am gonna do something really speacial for my girls when they start.

Jesse


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## Zeppy3 (Mar 3, 2003)

I remember when I got my first period in the summer before 6th grade. I was only 10-1/2! I was so glad my mom told me what to expect before I started!

I don't have any daughters, but ds#1 was about 12 when his voice started changing big time. Now he's 13 and sounds like his dad!

Zeppy3


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## TigerTail (Dec 22, 2002)

i was 13, and the latest of everyone i knew- i thought i was a freak! (one friend got hers at 9!) my dd was 12, her dad's side 'matured' faster.

suse


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## Spookygirl (Sep 14, 2002)

I was 9







Precocious Development they called it, Hell I called it. Half my friends didn't even know what a period was...


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## Moooommy (Nov 20, 2001)

I was 12, have no idea when my mother started (we don't talk about such personal things). It was preceeded by my very first migraine.

From the start I was regular at 28 1/3 days, and I still regulate other women I am close to. I also had horrid cramps until I had my first child--at 34 (I'm 40 now). That's a lot of years bent over in pain.

Sixkids, I've found that homeopathic Mag Phos can help with crampiness. My heavy cramps still get ibupofen (Advil), which comes in a liquid if your daughter has problems swallowing pills. Cramps are caused by excess prostaglandin, which causes smooth muscles (uterus, stomach, intestines: all the involuntary muscles) to contract (which is why a period feels different if you use a pad, which allows the blood to come into contact with vulva, legs, etc.) The family of antiprostaglandin meds include aspirin, naproxen, and ibuprofen.

I'm kind of looking forward to menopause...


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## apmomto4 (Apr 3, 2002)

I was 14 when I got my first period.

And my oldest daughter will be 12 on the 18th of this month -- and nothing yet!! She's started most of the expected body changes, so I know it's not far away.

She's anxiously waiting for it, though!!


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## Golden (Mar 15, 2002)

I was an early bloomer. I was wearing a bra and got my first period when I was 10. Wayyyyyy too early. Young 10 too. I remember it was October and I had just turned 10 because I was in Washington DC for my birthday. That trip was not fun to say the least.

G.


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## ChelleRie (Apr 5, 2003)

I think I was almost 14. My oldest was 13, and my other DD was 12. It all starts so much sooner now.....

Michelle


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## LizaBear (Feb 1, 2003)

Winter of 4th grade - just before my 10th birthday.

Not a single friend got thiers until well into 6th grade - I felt like such a freak.

I kept my period a secret from my mom for almost 2 years though - to this day she doesn't know I started SO early.

Mom started at 16 - but wasn't regular until she was 19.


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## mimie (Mar 7, 2003)

I had just turned 12. I hated it. Up through 8th grade, I begged my mom to let me stay home from school when I had it. I was mortified to change my pad in the bathroom stall, because the other girls could hear the crinkling and would comment (rudely) on it.


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## sadean (Nov 20, 2001)

Summer of 1985 betwwen 7th and 8th grade







I was 13 1/2 and had been waiting axiously for it to start. It took about 6 months to become regular. I don't know how old my sisters were, but I believe my mother was 14. I have no daughters, so I have no current info on the "next generation".


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## Mutherluv (Apr 19, 2003)

I was 12, 2 months after my birthday. My oldest dd was 12, and I am still waiting to see when my younger dd will start. Its funny, it doesn't seem strange for older dd, but I can't imagine my younger one starting. She seems like such a baby to me. Oh well, you can't stop them from growing up


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## bloodrayne (Mar 5, 2003)

My mom thinks she was about 16. I was around 10, can't remember exactly. Don't really want to either.
:LOL


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## Mutherluv (Apr 19, 2003)

Hi, I just wanted to wish you all the best with your home birth! Are you using a tub? Have fun


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## Greaseball (Feb 1, 2002)

I don't have a daughter old enough, but I didn't start till I was 13.5, the summer before 8th grade. Most of my friends started between the ages of 9 and 12, and my mom was 12.

I also did not tell anyone. Finally by the time I was 14 my mom just assumed I had started. Today though, I can say I actually like the whole menstruation process! I'm so glad mine came back after only 6 months of bf and have been regular despite continued bf. I went to this retreat about gender issues and the men were given an assignment to list what they like most about being male and the women were to list what they like about being female, and most of the men said they were glad they didn't have to put up with "that time of the month."

Well, I listed "that time" as my absolute favorite thing about being a woman! I hope dd grows up to love her body and its processes.


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## somemama (Sep 25, 2002)

Growth-hormones in milk trigger early menses. That's why we buy milk from a local dairy that doesn't use bovine-growth-hormones.


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## neveryoumindthere (Mar 21, 2003)

i was 11 when i got it...my mom was 16! i think my sisters got it at 13 or 14

one of my friends from elementary school got hers in the 3rd grade! so she was like 9!!









when i was taking a 'family' course in university last year we looked at studies that show that each year the age of the first menstrual period is decreasing by an average of 4 months..
(ie. one year it's age 12yrs and 9 months, the next year 12yrs and 5 months is the avg age...make sense the way i explained?)

the theories talked about nutrition...supposedly that nutrition is 'better' now...hmm, i dont know about that...







:


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## journeymom (Apr 2, 2002)

Greaseball, that is such a healthy point of view! I hope I can encourage that in my dd.


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## applejuice (Oct 8, 2002)

My mom was 13.

I was 12 and 10 months.

DD was 11 and 2 months.

We are not obese, and I have tried to keep meat and dairy to a minimum, but still...

Someone told me that insecticides have hormones in them to cause a kind of "birth control" for insects.

Has anyone ever heard of this?

Yet,. . .I rarely used insecticides either.


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## LunaMom (Aug 8, 2002)

I was 15, my mom was 16. Both of us were very petite and thin at that age, so the body-fat-percentage thing probably had a lot to do with it.

My mom always had heavy, crampy periods, and I have very little discomfort with mine. I've never realy had cramps, just a sort of heavy, achy feeling for the first day.

My daughter is only four (I like to visit this forum though!), but she is already taking after dh's family in body type, and dh's sister and mom both started very early, nine or ten or so. I plan to celebrate dd's first period in a special way so it can be a positive experience for her.


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## EnviroBecca (Jun 5, 2002)

Quote:

when i was taking a 'family' course in university last year we looked at studies that show that each year the age of the first menstrual period is decreasing by an average of 4 months..
This cannot be true. If in 1983 the average age was 12 years 6 months, by now it would be 5 years 10 months!

Maybe you meant "each decade" instead of "each year"???


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## neveryoumindthere (Mar 21, 2003)

sorry about the misinformation. i dont know why i typed that







:

Quote:

In North America age at menarche decreased by three to four months each decade after 1850; in 1988 the median age at menarche was 12.5 years among US girls (FORREST, J.D. Timing of reproductive life stages. Obstetrics and Gynecology 82(1): 105-111. Jul. 1993.)
i hope i didnt scare anyone into thinking their little girl was gonna have her period at age 5 (although it's 'possible')


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## shari1973 (Apr 18, 2002)

I got mine when I just turned 10 yr right on my Birthday. That sucked. I hope my daughter does not get hers that earlly.


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## Greaseball (Feb 1, 2002)

The youngest pregnancy on record occured in a 5-year-old.

That is just sad.







But apparently it is possible. (Hopefully rare, though.)

I wonder, with girls menstruating earlier and eariler, what is the age we should tell them about it? I wouldn't want it to come as a shock, but a child age 6 or 7 may not fully understand the explanation.

When I was 11 I had a bladder infection where I urinated blood. I thought I had my period because it looked like only blood and not urine. I wore tampons for a few weeks straight (!) and didn't say anything to anyone. I didn't have a working knowledge of menstruation and reproduction until I was 16. It would have been nice to know before then.


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## Alexander (Nov 22, 2001)

Thought you'd find this relevent.

http://www.newscientist.com/news/news.jsp?id=ns99993724

a


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## Pynki (Aug 19, 2002)

My mother got hers at like k18, but she was anorexic, so even after she got it she didn't get it regularly...

I got mine when iwas 14 (3 months away from my 15th bday... )

I don't have any daughters so ican't help you there...

I also don't know about kids starting earlier because back n the day people were married and had kids by the time they were 14, and 16 was an old maid.. Of course life expectancy was like 40 on a good day, but still..

Warm Squishy Feelings...

Dyan


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## Greaseball (Feb 1, 2002)

I read the absent father thing...

You know, it could be that the girls' problems aren't due so much to the father being absent, but maybe to the reason he is absent in the first place.

For example, girls with absent fathers often have high rates of drug abuse, eating disorders, and teen pregnancy. But that is also the case for girls who have been sexually abused, and sexual abuse may be one reason dad is no longer there...I when studying any case of absent fathers and problem daughters, one should try to find out what caused the father to be absent in the first place.

I also read somewhere else that sexual abuse at an extremely young age can trigger early puberty.


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## Pynki (Aug 19, 2002)

about the absent father thing...

My parents got divorced when i was 8... My dad moved to another state when i was 12( ? ) i think... I didn't see him often, or nearly as often as i would like, but neither my sister or I started our periods particularly early.. I think my sister was 13.. Like i said.. I was 14.. I think my 1/2 sister by him.. Who has lived with him her whole life started earlier than either of us.. Of course she developed more quickly than either of us because ot the genetics on her mom's side...

Warm Squishy Feelings...

DYan


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## Mahaylea (May 30, 2003)

I was 13 and so was my first d/d....I have really heavy periods that last for 5days and she has really longish ones, but not so heavy..


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## Valerie.Qc (Nov 19, 2001)

Mine were my 13th birthday gift







My dd is 12 (and 7 months) and just start saturday









I don't know what to think about the body-fat-percentage: dd is 5'3" and weight 75 pounds







: No much fat there!


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## member234098 (Aug 3, 2002)

mom was 13

I was 12 and 10 months

DD was 10 and 1 month


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