# My DD screams when I wipe her :(



## kands (Aug 17, 2005)

Anyone else's daughter do this? Like all little girls, sometimes when she poops, some of it gets in her vaginal area and I have to clean it out. She absolutely screams when I do this. She tries to squeeze her legs together and twists all around and tries to get away. It is probably as traumatizing for me as it is for her--I hate doing it and it makes me very upset to think that I am hurting her. but I have to get it out because I don't want her to get some sort of infection. What do you all do about this? Is there a reason for it? Anything I could be doing differently? It is SO upsetting that it makes me want to cry!

ps. She's 17 months old and has only been babysat a few times and with people I trust explicitly (only with people to whom she is willed to if, God forbid, her other mother and I both die, actually). She was a preemie, but was only in the hospital for three and a half weeks and never had any invasive procedures or catheterization to contend with.


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## KMK_Mama (Jan 29, 2006)

What kind of wipes are you using?

If you are using disposable, I would try a baby wash cloth with just plain water. If I try and wipe my son with disposable wipes if he is a bit rashy he screams in pain and I remember my girls doing the same thing with their girly parts. I don't know what it is in those disposable wipes that makes them sting, but I tried wiping off a small cut I had once and it HURT.


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## angelcat (Feb 23, 2006)

Hmm, maybe she has or had a a bit of a rash there so it hurts, or she thinks it will?

One thing that might help is a diaper rash spray. I use one called "Little one for Baby Bums". I got it at Walmart. It's zinc, alcohol & fragrance free. It's for rash, but also can be used for cleaning. When Rachel has a bad rash, I spray it on before I use start to clean her, and it makes it easier & faster for me, and thus more comfortable for her.

If you use baby wipes, maybe try ones with penaten, or just a different brand than usual, li9ke a name brand instead of a store brand. (Might be slightly softer.)

For cloth, I guess just use the softest cloths you can find. You're probably already doing that, though, if you use washlcoths or something.


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## angelcat (Feb 23, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *KMK_Mama* 
What kind of wipes are you using?

If you are using disposable, I would try a baby wash cloth with just plain water. If I try and wipe my son with disposable wipes if he is a bit rashy he screams in pain and I remember my girls doing the same thing with their girly parts. I don't know what it is in those disposable wipes that makes them sting, but I tried wiping off a small cut I had once and it HURT.


Some wipes have alcohol in them. I forgot about that, but for sure, check for that & change wipes if you are using commercial wipes.

Actually, the plain water & washcloth is probably the best. I had to do that for awhile.


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## Ambyrkatt (May 27, 2005)

MY DS would do that when we fed him dairy. It gave him a little bit of a red rash which must have hurt pretty badly because he would scream and hold his legs together and clench his butt cheeks.







We stopped feeding him dairy and diaper changes have gotten a lot easier. He still tries to roll over and run away, but that's just the toddler in him.


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## mothragirl (Sep 10, 2005)

could you just rinse her in the sink instead?


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## kands (Aug 17, 2005)

I hadn't thought about rinsing her in the sink. That might be a possibility. As far as wipes go, we use Cotton Babies cloth wipes with plain water. She doesn't have a rash and is not prone to diaper rashes at all. And it's definitely not her bum--she doesn't care if I wipe her there, it's only when I try to wipe her vaginal area that she screams. It is so odd... and a little scary. If I weren't 100% positive that she has never been abused, I would be seriously frightened.


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## Demeter9 (Nov 14, 2006)

She could just be sensitive. I know I was. Anything but water or tp bothered me.

She could also have a yeast infection.


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## Dreaming (Feb 8, 2004)

my dd has always been that way and she's never had anyone dh or i change her dipe.
i have used both cloth and disposable wipes with the same results.
we bought a wipes warmer thinking it would help.

what has helped is distraction.
i have no qualms about changing her diaper in front of the t.v. with a dvd playing.
she gets involved with the show and i can clean her without all the freakouts.
fwiw, i just think my dd is really sensitive.
i only go near her vulva if she has pooped.


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## Mama Poot (Jun 12, 2006)

She might just be sensitive. I apologize for this TMI but my clit is horribly, uncomfortably sensitive- I avoid the damned thing most of the time to this day and I'm 22. No abuse or anything like that, its just how I am. Could be your little girl is the same way. Just be extra extra careful.


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## northcountrymamma (Feb 24, 2006)

my dd was the same way...I just couldn't figure it out - tried new wipes, the softest home made flannel wipes with just water, with special essential oils, everything. Then I treated her for yeast and now she's fine with it.
Basically my np told me that the first sign of canadida is pain is just this problem. While I was treating her I just used a spray bottle with water and a drop of lavender to sooth the pain and if she got poop in her labia I would plop her in the sink to clean it out.

HTH, it's hard knowing that you have to do something when it seems to be causing your little one pain.


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## ladybugchild77 (Jun 18, 2004)

My dd goes through periods where she is like this too...it is not when she has a rash either. This may sound nuts, but I notice she does it more when she is teething or not feeling well...she starts screaming at diaper changes and - BAM! - the next day or two a tooth appears, she goes through a terrible cold, or another developmental milestone...just a thought...I know, I sound wierd but it's a pattern I have noticed...


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## northcountrymamma (Feb 24, 2006)

:
same with dd when she was teething


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## kands (Aug 17, 2005)

Thank you all so much for your help! It makes me feel better knowing that my little one isn't the only one.

I wouldn't be surprised if she is just ultra-sensitive. Her other mother (to whom she is genetically related) is uber-sensitive in all areas (similar to Mama Poot!), so it would make sense.

And, LBC77, she just happens to be getting a huge molar right now and the diaper changes have recently gotten even worse, so perhaps that is a pattern for us, too.

In the meantime, I am avoiding wiping her when possible which seems to help. I will ask our ped about yeast, but I haven't noticed any discharge of any sort and she doesn't appear to have any rashes either. But you never know--we did have thrush for six months!

Thank you all so much for easing my mind!


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