# Third Labors and Births: Discuss!



## Jaimee (Jun 7, 2007)

I would like to build on this previous thread about how long third labors compared to the first two. I'm interested in more details as I know that third labors/births seem to be a bit of a wild card. For some, they continue the trend of getting shorter and easier. But, it seems for many they are longer and more difficult, sometimes even more so than their first.

I'd love to hear details about your third labors and births and how they were different or the same as either of your first two. But since a lot of different things affect the course of a labor (induction, augmentation, environment, stressors, physical health, emotional well being, care providers, preparedness, early/late timing, rupture of membranes, baby's position, previous c-section, etc., etc.) I especially want to hear *WHY* you think your third labor progressed the way it did.

I'm curious if there is a trend toward more difficult third labors because of expectations that it will be easier than the second when in fact it is a unique labor, following it's own course, which causes frustration. Or if perhaps there tends to be a physical component the third time around like the uterus is less toned, looser such that babies get malpositioned easier. Or if there is a connection between how close the second and third pregnancies are such that mothers are less rested (a little one still nursing and waking up at night) and less recovered from their last pregnancy (weaker abs and pelvic floor), etc.. If you suspect any of these things (or others), I would really appreciate any ideas you might have to help the third labor be more successful/enjoyable/easier.

Thoughts I have had so far are drinking red raspberry leaf tea, preparing myself mentally for a different birth, getting preemptive acupuncture/moxibustion for better positioning toward the end of the pregnancy, making use of www.spinningbabies.com for other positioning ideas, working at being as rested as I can be in those last weeks, etc.

Your comments, suggestions and experiences are much appreciated!!

ETA: Midwives and doulas, please feel free to add your observations as well!


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## Jenni1894 (Apr 1, 2011)

My 3rd was the hardest and seemingly most painful...but also the shortest.

When i was preggo we moved...DH works lots and long hours and I pretty much moved myself. All he had to do was furniture. Our whole family bailed on us, so it was me and him moving all our stuff. Plus I had my other 2 to care for. I think my pg was stressful, I lost a lot of weight and didn't take care of myself the way I should have. I was induced at 37 weeks ish. I wasn't even finished packing. I was unprepared totally. I also had a nervous break down while in labor. This was my first labor without my mom...and I was crying and hyperventalating and missing my kids and feeling guilty about my SIL having my other 2. It seemed more painful. But it was much quicker than the other 2.


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## sharita (Dec 18, 2009)

My third followed my 2nd pitocin induction where I didn't have the epidural. It was 3 hours total. I felt amazing afterwards and actually thought, "Man, I could do this once a month, no biggie". So when it came to the third, I refused the induction though I was two weeks late again and rescheduled it to buy some time for 5 days later. The very next day I awoke early hours of the morning in labor on my own. However, I don't know why, maybe it's because I slept though the early part or natural labor just surprised me, but it was way more intense and painful than my previous pitocin induction. I got the shakes before I could even get DH up. I could barely make it to the car and was already unable to speak through them before we got the the hospital. It was so intense. I had no expectations really but thought somehow it would be easier. I still managed with no epidural, got a shot of something in the IV though.

It was only 4 hours from when I awoke until she delivered. However, my immediate after thoughts after that labor were much different. Instead of "I can do that every month" I seriously thought "I will never have another child again."

They say the pain of childbirth is so easily forgotten. Indeed it was with my 2nd, even first, but after my third, I was still shuddering at the memories of the intensity of the pain months later.

I did go on to have more though but none as intense as her.

I often try and figure out what was different about that labor. Was it really more painful or was it just psychological, my first time going into labor naturally, not knowing what to expect. Maybe, a pitocin induction doesn't have the same physical effects as natural labor since it just starts stimulating contractions where natural labor begins with surges of hormones and your whole body goes through chemical changes. Maybe it was just the whole body experience and I just percieved it as pain as it was so new and unknown to me.

Maybe it was also missing the slow build up of labor having slept through it and waking up dilated to 4-5 already with contractions 3 mins apart just overwhelmed and even frightened me. We all know fear=pain.

I can't say still after several more births and experience if it was just luck, how it was percieved, or if some labors really just hurt more than others even though nothing else is different (same size babies by a few oz., vaginal delivery, almost same laboring time, etc) Everything based on research and supporting natural childbirth says my 3rd should have been LESS painful such as going into labor on my own, no pitocin like before, not allowing them to break my water but letting it break during transition where they broke it early before, yet somehow, it was so much less painful and intense the time before even with all the interventions. Perhaps its a little of both. State of mind (this was new territory for me where the time before, I had already been through 1 induction so it was familiar and I had awesome nurses that were so gentle and accomodating with me. 3rd time, they were busier and didn't get a lot of one on one attention so I labored alone.

I have always heard too that 1st labors are long, 2nd are short, and 3rd are unpredictable.


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## Jaimee (Jun 7, 2007)

Where are all the mamas with 3+ kiddos? Please share your thoughts; I really appreciate it!!


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## msmiranda (Apr 22, 2009)

Definitely interested since I started the previous thread you referenced -- I will have something to report in a few weeks!


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## L&K'smommie (Aug 23, 2007)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Jaimee*
> 
> I would like to build on this previous thread about how long third labors compared to the first two. I'm interested in more details as I know that third labors/births seem to be a bit of a wild card. For some, they continue the trend of getting shorter and easier. But, it seems for many they are longer and more difficult, sometimes even more so than their first.
> 
> ...


My third birth continued my pattern...it was not longer than previous labors and while it felt a bit harder than my 2nd birth it wasn't by much.

For history:

#1: Born at 39w3d, 7lbs 4oz, from first contraction to baby labor was 12 hours...transition was an hour(I went from 5-8cm in a hour and then 8-10cm the next hour), pushing was 1/2 hour. CNM broke my water when I was 8cm. I had been dilated to 3cm and 80% effaced 3 days before going into labor.

#2: Born at 40w, 7lbs, 12oz, from first contraction to baby, labor was just under 4 hours...was dilated to 5cm for 5 days before he was born(had been dilated to 3cm at 36weeks)...active labor was under 2 hours, arrived at the hospital around 5:45am(we think), was checked around 6 by the nurse and was 8-9cm, he was born at 6:23am), pushing was 4 pushes through 2 contractions. CNM broke my water when she arrived and I was all ready 10cm(he was born less than 10 minutes after she got to the hospital). His birth felt incredibly easy.

#3: Born at 39w 6d, 8lbs, 4oz, from first real contraction to baby, labor was 2 hours...was dilated to 3cm 2 days prior to his birth. Was in active labor the entire time...pushing was I think just 2 or 3 pushes. His birth was a waterbirth at home. my water broke while pushing. It wasn't hard, but felt harder than birth #2. With #3 I did take more supplements and took a few tinctures at the end of my pregnancy(red raspberry buds and another mixture), I also took iron.

The age gap between the first 2 kids is 2 days shy of 2 years, the age gap between #2 and #3 is 2 years and 3 months. #2 was sleeping through the night most nights when I had #3. I know I was in worse physical shape for #3(and now even more so for #4...I can compare this labor hopefully in the next few days







). With #3 I saw a chiro and never did with my first 2, I continue to see the chiro but a different one than I saw with my last pregnancy. Also with #3 I did a lot of reading, Ina May and Henci Goer and good, positive birth stories. I'm not a high stress person(I'm pretty relaxed about everything) so I didn't think or stress much about what labor would be like(I think I've done this more with this pregnancy).

So I don't know if that helps, but mine definitely continued in an easy pattern.


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## Peony (Nov 27, 2003)

The only thing that stayed the same with my 3rd labor is that it started the same time of day and was shorter then the previous ones. It was much, much harder though. My first two were girls that came naturally at 28 weeks. Labor with both was fine, nothing that I couldn't handle. #1 was around 19 labors of labor and #2 was 8. With my 3rd baby, he was a boy (unknown to me, we never find out) and 2 lbs bigger then my girls. He also decided to stay in longer, 41 weeks. I have always woke up with contractions early in the morning, same thing happened with #3, but labor was very intense right away. I ended up with a 4 hour labor and he was posterior which the previous babies had not been. For me, I think his positioning was the big reason why labor was so painful.


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## tireesix (Apr 27, 2006)

Third birth was the easiest by far!!!!!!! 7 lb 6 oz baby, labour of around 5 hours (previous 2 were 12 hours), really short pushing stage (10 mins, ok, so it was short for me, previous were between 1-3 hours ish). Baby wasn't B2B for a change when I went into labour, I wasn't overdue (first one I wasn't overdue but the docs decided I was overdue according to last period even though I have a cycle of 6 - 8 weeks and second babe I was nearly 3 weeks over) In fact, I gave birth on the due date worked out by conception date. I had no pain relief what so ever (first baby I had epi, spinal, pethi etc due to a horrible birth, second babe I had G+A). Really, it was just perfect!!!!!!!!!!

It HURT but at the same time no where near like the other 2 and it felt right!!!!!

I had the usual after birth issues, I always get a 2nd degree tear, always have issues with either bleeding or retained placenta but MW managed it at home this time.

What do I believe made this birth so much better?

The fact that I was totally alone while labouring and birthing. DH was either asleep or in the bath, MW was about 10 mins late, so it was just me and the tv or online mahjong. I wasn't poked, distracted etc, I didn't feel worried about people staring at me, I didn't have to worry about people looking concerned due to my being in pain, I didn't have to listen to people worrying about long pushing stages and mentioning hospital etc. It was just nice and peaceful.

Had I not got my self sterilised etc, I would have quite happily done another UC but planned. It was the most amazing experience.


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## CrazyCatLady (Aug 17, 2004)

Here is a summary of my third labor and birth story. Hopefully it can help you out some.

My third birth was probably my "easiest". During that pregnancy I suffered from extreme hyperemesis. I only gained six pounds and by the time I was 41+ weeks, it didn't seem like the baby had grown in a month or two either. An ultrasound even estimated him to be around 4 pounds. So I was going to accept an induction at 42 weeks just to get the pregnancy over with.

About a week before the induction, I had a couple of days that were extra bad. Couldn't eat, drink, do anything. I was on my own for that pregnancy and I feared for myself and the baby. So on Veterans Day morning I drove the 40 minutes to the nearest county hospital with a NICU (I had been previously instructed to go there for anything). I showed up wanting them to check on the baby and re-hydrate me, etc. Well they offered an induction same day and I took it. My second birth was an induction too, so I knew what I was getting into. But the thought of ending the pregnancy was just too tempting to pass up. I was terrified about being in labor while so tired and weak though, but I still decided to go for it.

By the time they got the pitocin hooked up, it was maybe 11 or 12? They kept trying to make me walk, but I was too tired. So I spent most of the day in bed watching the fox channel because I didn't care enough to change it. I had no stuff with me, so not much to do. Every friend and family member I have, had an excuse to bail on me that day, so I went through the labor and birth alone. The doctors and nurses also kept trying to get me to eat and drink, but I just felt too yucky. I was impressed with how crunchy they seemed to be at that hospital though, even if it was all mostly due to the hospital being so poor.

I never was offered pain relief and I never asked for it, the contractions had been very tolerable. I was undecided about if I would go for an epidural or not during that labor. I had done it both ways before and wasn't convinced about what my preference was (especially with an induction). Around 10pm I was still in bed doing nothing. I was texting my sister and telling her that things were beginning to get uncomfy, so I may not be able to text for much longer. About the same time a nurse came in and checked me. I was 9 something and my water broke on her during the check. Instantly...labor started to hurt! I kept standing by the bed and refusing to get back into it, being on my back hurt too much. The poor nurse was alone with me and kept trying to rub my back and help me and I just kept snapping at her. I was alone, in pain, scared, and taking it out on her. Finally things were serious and she stuffed me in the bed and rolled me into the delivery room.

Things went pretty quick there. I was on my hands and knees on the bed and refused to turn over. It hurt. I was yelling at everybody because I wanted drugs and they wouldn't give them to me lol. I didn't want to throw up, I didn't want to lay on my back, I didn't want to be in labor anymore. This was my first time being "difficult" in labor...and boy was I difficult. Everybody was so calm and nice about it though, they really tried to make me feel better. Nobody got mean or offended by me or anything. I pushed on my hands and knees for a bit. Finally close to crowning, I got tired and said ok to laying on my back. Maybe three pushes later and I birthed my almost 9 pound baby boy!

Later on the birth certificate I saw that he was born at exactly 10:30. So I had gone from not even noticing the contractions to holding my baby in about 30 minutes time. During the ordeal it felt like hours though lol. My other two births had taken much longer than that. He and I were both fine and I recovered from the hyperemesis very quickly.

I can't compare my third birth to my first two because all of the circumstances were so different. I went into the labor with zero expectations. I was very malnourished and underweight for the entire pregnancy. It was a different "father", I was under a lot of stress during the pregnancy including being homeless. I had no real plan for the birth and no labor support. I say it went miraculously well considering everything though. Not sure I would have been so lucky if it was my first or second birth. I think it being my third birth is what helped things go so quickly despite my being unable to walk or do anything to help the process along. I could be wrong though, it could have just been dumb luck. I am about to give birth to my fourth...so we'll see.

Good luck on your upcoming birth OP.


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## indignantgirl (Jul 24, 2005)

My second and third births were exactly the same, except that my third baby flew out of me all at once and with my second, there was a pause between the emergence of head and body. I went into labor at the same time of night, they both lasted ~3 hours (slightly less), the babies were born almost at the same time, and to my knowledge I wasn't dilated beyond a fingertip before I went into actual labor. Both of these births were unassisted. They were every bit as painful (but more intense) than my first, but it felt different in that it felt manageable.

I remember going into labor with my second: me and DH took the opportunity to have a DTD-fest with a few "big O's" for each of us. I just had to make him stop completely during contractions. I was CERTAIN that this was what made the labor so fast and intense, until my third birth when we didn't DTD during labor and it was just as intense.

I can't compare my second and third births with my first birth too much because I was induced a week early (on my doc appointed EDD) with my first and it was therefore longer (and just *different*) than it might have been otherwise. I was not dilated, effaced, the baby hadn't dropped, etc. For all I know, my first might have been like my other two if left alone.


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## Jaimee (Jun 7, 2007)

Thank you so much for sharing ladies! Anyone else?


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## jodi5 (Mar 6, 2006)

My third was by far my best labour. My first was 32 hours, my 2nd 15 hours, my 3rd 3 hours. With my first 2 labours, I was never able to use any pain meds since I laboured very slowly for many hours and then jumped super fast. I went from 2-10 in about 45 minutes with my second. Although I dilate slowly in the early part of my labour, it still always felt very instense. A nurse told me that my body spends a lot of time softening etc. and does not dilate and then when it decides to go, it just goes fast. Due to this, I decided with my third that I wanted to try a water birth at home and I used hypnobabies.

My third birth was definitely a wild card. I had never had a braxton hicks that I was aware of in my life the first two times through. With my third, I kept trying to go into labour but it just wouldn't happen. I think this happened though because the midwives kept trying sweeps etc. to try to push me into labour and although it started contractions, I just could not stay in labour. We suspected that perhaps I couldn't labour with my kids around as well, so we ended up sending them to my mom's house to see if that helped. Still nothing happened. My sister had been calling me once per week to see if I was in labour yet since she wanted to come visit me but only if the baby had arrived or I was in labour. Well, each week, nothing had happened. So, went I was about 11 days over, I got my weekly call from my sister and yet again, nothing. I talked to her that about the fact that she had 5 days off and that it was likely I would have the baby sometime during that period so I suggested she come anyways. She had been at my first birth and I thought this way perhaps she would get to attend my third. So, after some humming and hawing she decided to come. She arrived at my mom's house that night. The next day, my dh went to work in the afternoon. My mom sent my sister over to keep me company. When she arrived we started to chat and I relaxed on the couch. Suddenly she looked at me and said, "You are having contractions aren't you". I said that I was but didn't think much of them. She thought they were closer than I thought so went to time them. We realized they were 3-4 minutes apart and almost a minute long. We decided to call the midwife but couldn't get a hold of them. The pager was not working for some reason. I had her just keep calling about every 10 minutes. I called my dh and told him he should come home from work. I was very relaxed chatting with my sister and sitting on the yoga ball. After a few minutes it was getting more intense so I decided to go sit in the computer room where I could listen to the hypnobabies. I was very relaxed. I did feel pain unlike what hypnobabies suggests but I was very relaxed and in control so I think the program was very good. I kept chanting through each wave "open open open". When the midwives arrived, she saw me and thought we should check me. We weren't thinking well since we decided to do this downstairs in the spare bedroom. When they checked me I was 5 cm. They new this meant I was likly starting my big jump. I asked my sister and dh if the tub was ready so my dh hurried to get that done. I had one more contraction and suddenly felt like pushing. This whole time, I could really feel my cervix dilating. The hypnobabies did this for me. I felt everything that was happening and was able to displace a lot concentrating on that. My midwife had gone upstairs to get her equipment ready. I couldn't figure out how I was going to get up the stairs. This was the only time I felt out of control. I went to the washroom and my sister and dh came downstairs and told me they would help me up the stairs, that although the tub was 1/2 way full, the midwife had told them that if I wanted to use it, I had better get in. I was not getting any break at all and coulnd't figure out how to do this. Finally I realized I was going to have to do a real push, so I did. Once I did one push, my dh and sister ran me up the stairs, as I was crossing the floor, the next wave came, I practically lunged into the tub and pushed again. When I hit the water, all my control was back. I don't really remember any pain after that, just a ton of pressure. For the first time in all my births, I welcome all my contractions. I felt inside me and could feel Reid's little head, it was so neat. I always new exactly where he was inside me and felt very powerful. I got into a better position for pushing and within 10 minutes he was out. I was so amazed.

It was such a different birth than I had ever had. I was so relaxed for most of it. I highly recommend hypnobabies. I did feel pain,, but I was relaxed and in control for most of it. I was able to mentally displace the pain most of the time as I concentrated on feeling myself dilate and for the first time, I felt powerful. I never did in my hospital births. I knew when his head was close to coming out and I could feel him sliding down me. Such a wonderful experience. I felt really good after birth and was walking around quite quickly. I had injured my tailbone in my previous birth being on my back so much but not the case this time. I just got to enjoy my little one. For me, my third birth was a bit redeeming for me, to have an exprience that I will treasure.

Jodi


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## Aka mommy (Feb 25, 2005)

DD#1 - 39 hours of labor, intense back labor the entire time. Around the 30th hour of labor they artificially ruptured my membranes and put me on a Pitt drip at the highest dosage due to failure to progress. 4 hours later I had enough and was ready to rip the IV out of my arm and hurt anyone that came near me. An hour later I received an epidural that i didnt want after the OB said i had to get the epi regardless because I was on my way into a Csection since dd wasn't tolerating labor well. DH became my knight in shining armor and reminded her my waters had not been ruptured for 24 hours yet and dd's heart decels were minimal. She gave us a few more hours with constant monitoring after I received my epi and insisted if baby continued to have issues she'd perform the csection. 3 hours later I was still at a 1 and the OB gave us 30 minutes to come to terms with a csection, 30 minutes later I explained to the nurse that i needed to poop and she laughed at me and said it was too quick for the baby to have descended. 28 minutes later my dd was born posterior. Pretty rough labor painwise

DD#2 was a gentle, homebirth. She was born after 12 hours of labor with a nuchal hand in the posterior position. I stayed around a 2 most of the labor, hit transition and went from a 2 to a 10 in about an hour, she was born with 1 push and it was an ecstatic birth, though I did have pretty intense back labor again. I believe this was due to ARM at around the 10th hour of labor.

Birth #3 was for a surrogacy. Was the most painful day of my life (ironically on my own birthday). But again my body followed it's own pattern. Not much progression for most of the labor and then as transition hit I went from a 3 to a 10 in about 20 minutes. Water broke at about 9 am with blood in it. She was born about 6 hours later. Such intense pain I wanted to literally either step in front of a truck or perform my own csection. Due to it being a surrogacy we'd agreed on a hospital birth, but my mw's who were acting as my doulas and dh refused to transfer me because i wasn't even barely a 3 (had to be stretched to be that even) and we all knew it was too early. But at that point i didn't care and was in so much pain i wanted an epidural and the baby OUT. Ironically she was not posterior, despite the AWFUL back labor.

I know you only asked about the 3rd birth, but ihave to continue this story. My 4th birth was the most amazing gift i've ever received. I had PTSD after the third birth and actually lost all faith in natural childbirth and home birth. To the point that it was previously my passion and calling in life to eventually become a midwife and i turned my back on it. I went through a LOT of therapy and knew that the pain from that birth was partially due to the emotional issues i had with the intended parents and their crappy treatment of me. It was a really hard pregnancy emotionally due to issues with them and teh agency and so i believe a lot of my fears played out during the birth. I was fearful for the decisions i'd made to become a surrogate, i was fearful of failure in my mW's eyes if i could not acheive a normal and pain free birth, I walked away from the birth feeling as if my doula's had emotionally and physically raped me. It took a lot of therapy to get through. I had decided to never become pregnant ever again and ironically I somehow double ovulated and conceived my son 3 months after the birth as a surrogate. From the start i said i was going to have a planned section and didn't bat my eyes at it as i lived in denial from the fear and pain of the last birth. Anyways, i'm going on and on but basically through the pregnancy i found an amazing homebirth care provider who let me call the shots in regards to how the birth would go and who supported my trauma as being real. I also read Painless Childbirth as well as another book called Broken Open. Between those 2 births I learned to trust in myself and be willing to accept and own any pain that came to me, because the longer i tried to fight it off i knew the longer it would progress it. My son was born after 3 hours of labor that i had NO clue i was in. My mw's arrived about 30 minutes before he was born, i agreed to them checking me but didn't want to know what i was at and i was at an 8. He was born with about 3 good pushes, weighing 9 lbs, in my arms at my home with no pain. It was the greatest blessing of my life!

And i write all of that to explain that i believe in the power of the mind and our ability to accept our births as they each are different and carry their own emotional journey. And i highly recommend that book for anyone who is fearful of birth. I learned that while i may not believe in pain free birth, i did believe in the power of my body and the ability to walk through the fire so to speak. My son's birth was my phoenix process and i just so happened to be blessed by an amazing birth. Also, another thing, my mw as I hit transition reminded me that it wasn't pain. It was energy. My son's energy was going through my body and it's something that we only get to experience once in a lifetime with that particular child.


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## 4C-mom (Jul 1, 2007)

My 3rd one was my easiest. It was my fourth that was the hardest, by far!!

1st baby-- 41w2d, 15 hours labor, 8#2oz baby. Pushed about 45 mins

2nd baby-- 41w0d. 11 hours labor, 8#8oz baby. Pushed??? I wanted to go natural for this one, but it was so long and slow (5cm to 7cm took 8 hours--all overnight) i was so tired, i finally got the epidural, then went from 7cm to baby in arms in less than 2 hours

3rd baby--40w2d. 8 hour labor, 8#11oz baby. pushed 9 mins. This was my easiest. I was 7cm by the time I got to the hospital, and my biggest complaint at that time was how nauseated I was. The contractions hurt, but the nausea was nasty. I did throw up, too.I was uncomfortable at home, but only realized it might be labor when I couldn't focus on watching my favorite TV show. I got an epidural because I was so disappointed by my failed NCB attempt with #2. The pregnancy was my shortest, labor was my shortest, pushing was short. Intact perineum. I delivered at 4am and went home at 5pm next day. None of my labors were induced

4th baby -- 41w2d. 13 hour labor. 10#7oz baby. Pushed 10 mins. For comparison, I had such an easy 3rd labor that I was hoping my fourth would follow the same path. NO. my first three gestations had been getting shorter, so I hoped this one would too. Nope. I was re-dedicated to NCB. I again got to the hospital at 7cm. I did well unmedicated, and quickly progressed to 9.5cm, where I got stalled.(exact time unsure, but prob 4-6 hours total) No urge to push. Tried to push, but had no urge and it hurt too bad. I asked for AROM thinking the baby would come down adn out. Nope. It hurt like holy hell, and I'm sure that was made worse by my anxiety attack during labor. I had poor support, and ended up with an epidural that i still regret, and a huge baby with a shoulder dystocia and fractured clavicle. He also came out bluish, and ended up with a one min apgar of 2, so i didnt get to have him placed on my stomach immediately. He's 3 now, cute, adorable, adn had no lasting effects from his fractured clavicle.

So, yes, my third was my shortest pregnancy, shortest labor, and easiest delivery!


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## Lilibiscus (May 19, 2011)

My third was my shortest birth... my labors were 8 hours (induced), 4 hours and 2 hours. My 2nd labor (at home) was 4 hours and very manageable compared to pitocin labor, I had some prodromal labor that time. With my third, I had weeks of prodromal labor and went past my EDD for the first time... finally a stretch and sweep pushed me over the edge into labor which was just over 2 hours from the time I said "this is real labor". It was really painful because she had her hand up her face and I had back labor for the first time.

So in my case, my 2nd labor/birth was my easiest though not shortest.


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## Jaimee (Jun 7, 2007)

So it sounds like for several of you there were some serious stressors (emotionally and/or physically) making your third labors harder and for others some malpositioning. Glad to hear the why's behind these stories! And happy to hear for some the third was the best!


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## carseatqueen (Apr 14, 2008)

My third was by far the eaisest!

#1- Natural hospital birth. Dr broke my water at 4 cm, baby was born 1.5 hours later. Some tearing. She was 39+4, or 39+1 according to the Dr, but he was wrong.  7 lbs 1 oz.

#2- Freestand birth center with a midwife. Got there at 5ish cm, but not in pain (afraid of not making it in time) Had him 4.5 hours later. Some tearing. Big head and 7 lb 11 oz. 39+2

#3- Homebirth with same midwife group as #2. Called mw at 5 told her not to rush. She arrived at 7 and I was doing laundry. DS arrived at 7:50, 5 minutes after I asked her to please break my water since I was 7.5 cm and ds1 had just been picked up by my friend. 6 lb 7 oz (was breech till 37 weeks) at 39 exactly. No tears, one push. Seriously, it was hard to believe. I had also been to the chiro for the Webester technique, so between that and a smaller baby, and being relaxed at home just made it easy.

I'm thinking if #4 is the same or easier that would be great.


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## lookingforaname (Jun 17, 2007)

Baby #1: within days of the due date, 36 hour natural labor with CNMs who were hospital based. I think they sent me home from the hospital 2 times. The hot tub in the hospital was AMAZING at taking away the edge of pain (although maybe it was also stalling contractions?). Pushing was short and easy on a birthing stool. Despite the length of time, I have good memories of the birth - supportive, CALM midwives and hospital nursing staff.

Baby #2: Because of my LONG first labor, DH and I were totally prepped for another long haul. We were wrong. Hour and a half of labor, accidentally born at home. I did not qualify for the "when to call your midwife" criteria - although I was on the phone with her when I started screaming "I think I'm pushing!!!!" and dear baby boy was born. My fave midwife was ending her hospital call stretch, and came to my home to do all the post-partum checks. Wonderful experience.

Baby #3: So by the third pregnancy, we had moved to an area of the country with hospitals that are much less friendly to natural births - closest midwives are 2 hours away, and because of labor #2 they weren't/aren't an option. I did a lot of research and finally found a family practice doc who has a reputation of "being accused of acting like a midwife." I loved/love her - she is very calm, generally hands off, but I also trust her perspective and experience, based on her answers to my questions. When I toured the hospital, as soon as I mentioned that she was my doc, the nurse giving me a tour TOTALLY switched modes (in a good way), and seemed very accommodating. Same thing happened when I actually went to the hospital in labor - the nurse staff was friendly but hands off, and I didn't even have to get the hep-lock that my doc said they MIGHT insist on - I gave birth within 2 hours of getting to the hospital. Labor was 5 hours total, with most of it being pretty manageable (I'd say another 1 1/2 hours of uncomfortable/active labor), and mostly at home - although during transition I was definitely yelling, "I don't want to ever do this again!" - short pushing time again.

Baby #4 is on it's way. . . I'm still dreading labor for some reason, even though I've had such relatively easy experiences. . .


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## Jaimee (Jun 7, 2007)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *lookingforaname*
> Baby #3: So by the third pregnancy, we had moved to an area of the country with hospitals that are much less friendly to natural births - closest midwives are 2 hours away, and because of labor #2 they weren't/aren't an option.


This is very much our situation too, and I think a big part of why I'm so focused on getting third labor experiences right now. I'm just not sure which direction to go with my care and with the birth. Thank you for sharing!


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## berry987 (Apr 23, 2008)

My third was the hardest physically - longest (16 hrs from start of strong contractions until birth) and most painful (posterior position). It was a home birth, so I didn't use any pain medications and had to get in various positions to get him to descend (and squatting while holding onto my bed frame and pushing during incredibly painful back labor was just...awful).

That said, my first was a hospital induction that lasted about 14 hrs, resulted in a 4th degree tear and a baby in the NICU for a week due to meconium aspiration - so while it was not physically the hardest, it was emotionally very difficult for me. My second was a fast, smooth home birth that lasted 5 hours (and he weighed 11 lbs!).

Expectations definitely played a part for me. My best friend had her third 2 months before me and it was very quick and the least painful. My sister had her third several months before that, and again, it was quick and relatively easy. I figured the same for me. After 6 hours of very painful contractions, I found out I was only 3 cm dilated and realized it wasn't going to be easy at all. My midwife was amazing and worked very hard with me....especially when I started to panic about how long it was lasting and why it was hurting so much. My main emotion when I finally pushed him out was relief...and I distinctly remember saying "I am not going to do that EVER again!"

Now I'm pregnant with my fourth...so, yeah, I had a change of heart!

Edited: I just want to add that my third was my smallest baby (8 lbs, 4 oz) and I saw a chiropractor the entire pregnancy, which is supposed to help posterior positioning. I guess it's not a guarantee!


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## Jaimee (Jun 7, 2007)

Any more mamas of three or more feel like sharing? Thank you!!


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## yaboobarb (Mar 23, 2002)

My first home birth- only 5 hours of really hard labor ( sunny side up and hand next to face.) Just a few true pushes and my son was born. Labored in the water and came out to birth on land.

My second home birth, very intense raging labor, 2.5 hours. Two pushes I think. Birthed on floor with a birth ball.

I did it, but this one was INTENSE ( did I say that?)

My third was the easiest. I had contractions,but they were so easy.

In between, I had a looong rest.

I was thinking, " Is this really labor?" When my midwife told me that I could push*, I was surprised. It didn't seem like labor.









My daughter was out in two pushes. Birthed her in the water!

*( I wish she had not. It would have been cool to experience an un-interfered-with birth)


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## Jaimee (Jun 7, 2007)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *yaboobarb*
> " When my midwife told me that I could push*, I was surprised.
> 
> *( I wish she had not. It would have been cool to experience an un-interfered-with birth)


This is how I felt about my first. I had a latent stage, but didn't know that was what was happening so I didn't know to tell the mw's that I didn't want to push yet. With my second I reached that point where I felt like I couldn't take it anymore so I decided to give a little push and that started a chain reaction, which resulted in my son flying out just a few minutes later.


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## Jaimee (Jun 7, 2007)

Bumping this up again for more experiences!


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## Babydoll1285 (Apr 4, 2009)

My 3rd definitely followed the wild card idea I'd heard about. First was 11 hours, second was 4 hours, third was 11ish (longer if you count early labor, not quite active). It was still pain free like my second thanks to Hypnobabies but it was INTENSE! It took me almost 8 hours to get my contractions closer than 5 min apart. Pushing took longer too, even though I was upright, unlike my other two babies. Baby was born with a nuchal hand (waving hello!) in the caul and weighed almost a pound more than my 2nd. My mw told me later that's probably what made things so different. I just really had to embrace that each birth (and baby!) is different!

Interestingly enough, I started pushing at the same time of morning with all three kids, about 6:50am. First was born at 929, second at 657, and third at 714.


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## UnassistedMomma (Jan 24, 2006)

My 3rd was a cake walk. I woke up w/ the mildest twinges of labor somewhere between 4 and 6 am, went to church, came home and had a nap and had a normal day, with mild contractions all day long. Around 5-6 I got into a hot bath and just chilled, and at 845 pm I got out of the tub and told my husband it was time to go to the hospital.

Once we got to the hospital, I got into a rocking chair with a heating pad on my back, and that is right where I stayed until she was born in the wee hours of the night. I just rocked and rocked and rocked, eyes closed and kind of meditating quietly then all of the sudden just got up and crawled on the bed and went to work.

Fortunately, my midwife (who was more like an OB than a midwife I discovered too late - her husband is a perinatologist) was not on call, and I got her back up OB who was fantastic! Now he was a real midwife! He shooed nurses out of my room, kept lights down, told everyone to leave me alone ("She knows what she's doing, just get out") and he just popped in now and again to see how I was doing while hanging out having coffee. I didn't even have a heplock b/c he told them not to worry about it, after I insisted that I wasn't having it!

Once I got up on the bed and started to push, he very casually put down his coffee and popped on some gloves, and just caught. No direction, no orders, no panic, no rush, no anything messing with me - just a very relaxed assist. He was the absolute best, most genuine midwife ever. It was almost like a UC in the hospital!

After we were both cleaned up, I bundled my daughter, put all of my belongings in the wheel chair they brought down for me, and with my daughter in my left arm and pushing the wheel chair with my right, I walked us down to my room.

I checked out and went home about 6 hours later.

It was incredible!


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