# It's Apparent You're A Parent When...



## AFWife (Aug 30, 2008)

- Your children are cleaner than you are.

- You don't realize you haven't eaten until hours after you've fed everyone else.

- Being peed on, puked on, or even pooped on doesn't faze you because it happens daily.

Add yours!


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## faerierose (Jul 9, 2006)

You think it's normal to say things like "Cats are not for licking" and "Please don't put the raisins up your nose"


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## HappilyEvrAfter (Apr 1, 2009)

When you can't find your lipstick because your purse if full of crayons, toy cars, snotty tissues, the lovey, a juice box, etc....


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## tessie (Dec 6, 2006)

When you'll sleep in baby vomit rather than change the sheet, just to grab an extra five minutes of sleep.


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## emamum (Dec 4, 2008)

you cheer when the baby poo's







:


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## AFWife (Aug 30, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *tessie* 
When you'll sleep in baby vomit rather than change the sheet, just to grab an extra five minutes of sleep.

The baby vomits on you and you think "I should change shirts." It's the very end of the day before you realize you never actually did so...


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## NiteNicole (May 19, 2003)

Your really exciting night at the theater involves cookies, milk, and dinosaurs.


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## mamarootoo (Sep 16, 2008)

you listen to your college-age brother talking about finals week (and the grueling all night study sessions) and wish you could trade places with him... so that you could get more sleep!


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## Snuzzmom (Feb 6, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *faerierose* 
You think it's normal to say things like "Cats are not for licking" and "Please don't put the raisins up your nose"









"We don't vacuum the dog."









* A 10PM bedtime is a late night
* Getting a sitter two nights in a row seems like a luxury bordering on gross extravagance
* You enthusiastically ask your DH about his "poops" when potty-learning ears are in listening distance-- and esnthusiastically discuss your own
* Waking up at 9AM is sleeping late
* You can no longer watch TV shows or movies where children are hurt (like L&O:SVU... I used to love that show. There's no way I can watch it now).


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## AFWife (Aug 30, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Snuzzmom* 
* You can no longer watch TV shows or movies where children are hurt (like L&O:SVU... I used to love that show. There's no way I can watch it now).

When I first found out I was pregnant I was watching an episode of CSI that involved a child being molested and killed...I had to watch it in short pieces because it was so disturbing.


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## kirstenb (Oct 4, 2007)

You don't remember the last time you went to the bathroom with the door shut.

You exclaim "A bike!" every time you see one because DS is so infatuated with them, even when you are by yourself.


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## MusicianDad (Jun 24, 2008)

You start wondering if sex-ed teachers and instructed to talk about how much having a child can "ruin your life" because your life is better now that you have kids then it ever was before.

You start singing you LO's favourite kids song on the bus on your way home from the store because it's stuck in your head now.

You turn down a night out with a friend because you have other plans that you don't want to miss... that include popcorn, pillows and blankets in the living room and a G rated movie.


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## Ellen Griswold (Feb 27, 2008)

...when you have caught vomit in your hands without flinching.

...when you have nursed a child in a forward facing carseat while still being buckled in yourself.

...when you have to ask that underwear be worn at the dinnertable.


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## jenners26 (Mar 16, 2008)

*When your entire life is affected by if the baby has pooped yet or not.
*When you can whip up four different dinners for four different people in less than 20 minutes.
*When you spend more on diapers in a month than you do on clothes for yourself in a year.
*When you can clean up just about anything with nothing but baby wipes.
*When you find yourself looking forward to Jack Black being on Yo Gabba Gabba!
*When you find yourself watching iCarly and actually liking it long after the children are in bed. (Don't judge me...Spencer is hilarious!)


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## DaughterOfKali (Jul 15, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *kirstenb* 

You exclaim "A bike!" every time you see one because DS is so infatuated with them, even when you are by yourself.









My son fixates on things and I had definitely found myself doing that sort of thing.


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## MusicianDad (Jun 24, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *DaughterOfKali* 







My son fixates on things and I had definitely found myself doing that sort of thing.

Dh and I have definitely said over the years things like "Cat!" "Look a horse!" and "There's Orlando Bloom!"


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## angelamariebee (Jun 20, 2008)

When you can sucessfully snappi a prefold on a sleeping baby without waking them.









When you know what the terms "snappi" and "prefold" even mean.


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## AnnaNova (Nov 2, 2008)

when you find yourself flipping through 'good housekeeping' in the store looking for quick family friendly recipes instead of 'cosmopolitan'


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## Smokering (Sep 5, 2007)

When your baby is dressed immaculately in hand-sewn matching clothes, but you routinely wear the three-years-old top that's breastfeeding-friendly and has rusk smeared on the sleeves.

When your mother saves jam lids for you, because the baby likes to chew on them.


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## MamaJenese (Aug 14, 2006)

When the most dancing you have done in ages is in front of the potty, and invovles a song about learning to poop there. When you look at eveything you put down in the house and think, wll someone try to put this in thier ear, mouth, nose, etc!


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## Theoretica (Feb 2, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *HappilyEvrAfter* 
When you can't find your lipstick because your purse if full of crayons, toy cars, snotty tissues, the lovey, a juice box, etc....

Umm....when you don't even HAVE lipstick!!!


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## pixiekisses (Oct 14, 2008)

When you grab your (very grown, older than you) friends arm while attempting to cross the street and point out the car coming.

And later that same night push his drink longer in on the table, away from the edge.

And when you go to the bathroom a little later (same night) you announce that you "just have to go pee, be right back hon".

And you don't realize until reading this thread that that might have been weird to your friend and that you really haven't spent time out w/o kids in so many years.


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## OkiMom (Nov 21, 2007)

These are great.. I needed a chuckle.

When you say "its ok, mommy will get it" and realize that you weren't talking to your child or a child at all
When your bookcase that use to be full with classics is now full with Dr. Suess
When an intellectual conversation comes down to how fall the baby has crawled across the floor that day.


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## Breeder (May 28, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *OkiMom* 
When your bookcase that use to be full with classics is now full with Dr. Suess

I consider Dr. Suess to be a classic.









My additions:

*when you find yourself offering a "boo-boo kiss" to your husband who has stubbed his toe.


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## ChocolateNummies (Apr 9, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *tessie* 
When you'll sleep in baby vomit rather than change the sheet, just to grab an extra five minutes of sleep.

Or urine.







:

Quote:


Originally Posted by *kirstenb* 
You exclaim "A bike!" every time you see one because DS is so infatuated with them, even when you are by yourself.









We point out big trucks and heavy machinery.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Ellen Griswold* 
...when you have caught vomit in your hands without flinching.

I have done this soooo many times.









Now mine:
When dressing up to go out involves wearing a matching macaroni necklace and bracelet with homemade glitter glue/paper jewels strung on it becuz it was a special gift from your dc and seeing it on you makes his/her eyes light up.


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## Jojo F. (Apr 7, 2007)

These are great!!

When you get puked on and you don't even consider changing, just rub it in!!

When YOU smell like baby puke because it's still in your hair.

When you are bouncing/rocking your whole body when you aren't wearing your baby.


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## AFWife (Aug 30, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ChocolateNummies* 
Or urine.







:


This made me realize there's a huge urine spot on the side he sleeps on...and it's been there for DAYS (I had forgotten)


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## SkyMomma (Jul 13, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Jojo F.* 
When you are bouncing/rocking your whole body when you aren't wearing your baby.









My DH found himself doing this last week at work!

Here's mine:

When you find yourself spelling out words to your DP, no kids in sight.


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## Kim Allen (Jun 28, 2008)

Haha My Dh ask for booboo kisses sometimes








Ah I can totally relate to the whole sleeping in the pee. Altough we usually throw a towel over it until morning.
boogers dont fase me now.
While driving DS sees "COOOOWWSS" and you run off the road looking for the cow.


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## filiadeluna (Oct 2, 2007)

When you make up songs to sing during diaper changes, i.e. "Isobel pooped and Mommy changed the diaper.......Isobel pooped and Mommy changed the diaper!!!"









When you can't plan a time to sleep, and three hours in a row sound refreshing.

When you finally have "free time", you have to choose sleep vs. eating, vs. chores, vs. spending time with your s.o.

When you spend all day on MDC b/c you are nursing anyway, so you might as well be NAKing.









When leaving the house to go anywhere is a major ordeal, and you long for the days when you could leave on a whim & stay out as long as you wanted.


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## chipper26 (Sep 4, 2008)

When you've eaten food that has been gnawed on or even soggy.







It gives a whole new meaning to sharing food.


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## mamatoablessing (Oct 17, 2005)

...when you're not sure if the brown spot on your arm is chocolate or poop and then you lick it to find out.


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## Mama2Bug (Feb 18, 2005)

When you stay up until the wee hours just to get some time ALONE, rather than to hang out with others.
When your kid has dirt on her face and you instinctively lick your thumb. (Which you SWORE you would never do!)
When you wonder, in all seriousness, how much play dough is TOO much.
When you offer to "pee race" just to get your kid to try before you leave the house.


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## femalephish (Feb 3, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *faerierose* 
You think it's normal to say things like "Cats are not for licking" and "Please don't put the raisins up your nose"

















:

This thread is GREAT! It's the antidote to the scary once-you're-a-mom-the-fun-stops things that I have been hearing!


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## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

These are fun! I've been there with the messes on the shirt and not changing. (I got peed on- through a diaper- four times in one day and I think I changed after the fourth one)

I keep forgetting what I want to add! That's part of the fun, too! Oh, when you realize that you don't REALLY have to take a shower every day. (And get to take baths with your babe!)

When you realize how much time you wasted before you had your baby!

When you get crappy sleep, no time to yourself, have a stiff back from nursing, can't pee without it being an ordeal.... and you frequently fantasize about having another one!! Yes!


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## filiadeluna (Oct 2, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *hrsmom* 
When you realize how much time you wasted before you had your baby









:

Quote:

When you get crappy sleep, no time to yourself, have a stiff back from nursing, can't pee without it being an ordeal.... _and you frequently fantasize about having another one_!! Yes!


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## Peppermint Poppies (Jan 7, 2007)

.... you walk into someone's house and immediately start mentally 'babyproofing' before you've even sat down.

... you pack a 3-course meal for your LO whenever you leave the house, but don't eat anything yourself between breakfast and dinner

... your laundry is 2/3 nappies, 1/3 clothes, and very, very, very occasionally .... sheets


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## geiamama (Feb 3, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MusicianDad* 
Dh and I have definitely said over the years things like "Cat!" "Look a horse!" and "There's Orlando Bloom!"

To be fair though, you don't have to be a parent to obsess over Orlando Bloom!

Quote:


Originally Posted by *pixiekisses* 
When you grab your (very grown, older than you) friends arm while attempting to cross the street and point out the car coming.

LOL. I do that all the time!
My mother has even been known to lean over and cut up DH's meat for him before she or DH realises what she's doing!

Now mine:

You know you're a parent when your hot drink is always stone cold by the time you drink it and you eat biscuits (cookies) _really quietly_ in teh kitchen so that you don't have to share!







:


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## Mama2Jesse (Jan 5, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kim Allen* 
While driving DS sees "COOOOWWSS" and you run off the road looking for the cow.

Lol!


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## emamum (Dec 4, 2008)

you can say things like.. "no, i dont want to see your penis" "please stop wiggling your penis at me" without blinking

i make up songs as well, her favourite is

"pooper trooper, gunna change your nappy, cos you stink of poo (pa pa poo pa pa) yes you really do (pa pa poo pa pa) its a good job i love you" (to the tune of super trooper lol)


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## kblackstone444 (Jun 17, 2007)

When you find yourself pulling the blankets up over your Hubby... out of habit of recovering up your children in the middle of the night.

When you ask everyone, including your Hubby, if they're gone potty before leaving the house.

These were several years ago. My Hubby still has not let me live them down.


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## heidirk (Oct 19, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *emamum* 
you can say things like.. "no, i dont want to see your penis" "please stop wiggling your penis at me" without blinking









: This has been a frequent comment heard in our house recently!

you find yourself saying, 'no, you just peed two seconds ago, even if you pee right now, you can NOT have another jellybean!'









and, 'no, honey, the baby can't eat jellybeans, he doesn't have any teeth!'









you realise that your older ds licked diaper cream off his little brother's penis when you weren't looking!







:


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## Lynn08 (Dec 2, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *heidirk* 
you realise that your older ds licked diaper cream off his little brother's penis when you weren't looking!







:

laughup
Diaper cream! Why would anyone want to lick diaper cream?!!?!?







:














:


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## CallMeMommy (Jun 15, 2005)

When you stick your hand into your coat pocket to fish for your keys and instead pull out a bunch of Link-A-Doos.

I also slept in both vomit AND urine last night instead of changing the sheets. 5:30 comes too early to be messing with that, just throw a towel over it...


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## heidirk (Oct 19, 2007)

well, he says it tastes good. . .









he likes to eat lotion in general, though. . . and I don't know why.


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## ~savah~ (Aug 24, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mamatoablessing* 
...when you're not sure if the brown spot on your arm is chocolate or poop and then you lick it to find out.

I have so done this







: luckily it was chocolate lol.


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## Lynn08 (Dec 2, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *heidirk* 
well, he says it tastes good. . .









he likes to eat lotion in general, though. . . and I don't know why.









It's too funny! I can't stop laughing - lotion and diaper cream!


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## jojojojojo (Feb 4, 2009)

* When you don't care anymore that the back seat of your car is covered in milk splatters from your child repeatedly throwing bottles/sippy cups from the carseat.

* When you find yourself listening to or singing kids' songs even when there's nobody else around.

* When you give the best parts of your dinner away to your kids


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## artgoddess (Jun 29, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *kirstenb* 
You don't remember the last time you went to the bathroom with the door shut.

You exclaim "A bike!" every time you see one because DS is so infatuated with them, even when you are by yourself.

Once when out with a group of adult friends waiting on the outside patio for our table to be ready at a nicer restaurant I pointed up and said, "ooh lookie a helicopter!" when one went overhead. There were no children around to be amazed.


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## journeymom (Apr 2, 2002)

You know you are a parent when you plan ahead and give yourself small portions of dinner because you know the kids will leave plenty on their plates and you can finish theirs.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *geiamama* 
You know you're a parent when your hot drink is always stone cold by the time you drink it and you eat biscuits (cookies) _really quietly_ in teh kitchen so that you don't have to share!







:

Or if you hide a chocolate bar from the kids and eat it after they've gone to bed...









Quote:


Originally Posted by *emamum* 
"pooper troopee, gunna change your nappy, cos you stink of poo (pa pa poo pa pa) yes you really do (pa pa poo pa pa) its a good job i love you" (to the tune of mama mia lol)









That's too cute!


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## EnviroBecca (Jun 5, 2002)

...an open box of cookies or candy lasts two months in your household because if you eat one in front of your child, he'll want one, and you don't want to argue about how he didn't eat the nutritious dinner and you did, and then when he does eat a reasonable meal he is full and doesn't think to ask for a cookie, and you have hidden the box to avoid hearing him whine about wanting some, so you never have an opportunity to eat them and forget that they exist!

...your walls are covered in signs that say things like,
"GRANDDAD AND TRAINS"
"I AM A BUNNY YOU ARE A ROBOT"
"POLICE PLEASE POLICE PLEASE FLEECE FLEECE FLEECE"
"MY SHOULDER IS HURTING"
"STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE!"
"FLOATING ALIEN JELLYFISH"
"THOMAS WAS WORKING IN THE QUARRY"
"STEELERS ARE WINNING"
"BARACK OBAMA IS WINNING"
because your child is learning to write and keeps asking you to spell words for him to write and wanting to hang up his signs, and of course you want to encourage him, and it's only as you write this picturing the signs that you realize the events during which he wrote those last two signs were 3 and 5 months ago respectively.

...you take down the piece of aluminum foil with a Bandaid stuck on it that was taped to the wall above your bed for several weeks after your child was "decorating", and you carefully put it aside so that if he notices its absence and throws a fit, you can show him you did NOT throw it away.

...you respond to a friend's pessimism with, "You sound like Toad."


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## HappilyEvrAfter (Apr 1, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jenners26* 
*When you find yourself watching iCarly and actually liking it long after the children are in bed. (Don't judge me...Spencer is hilarious!)

















: i like iCarly more than my son does....i have to *ask* to watch it.

Lol. I watched 15 mins of SpongeBob the other day when I was home by myself before I even wondered why I was watching it.


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## CrunchyChristianMama (Dec 5, 2008)

The newest catch phrase at our house is "no no honey, we don't chew on electrical cords."


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## heidirk (Oct 19, 2007)

your ds walks up to you with a big grin, and a suspiciously gritty mustache and announces, "I eating SUGAR!" "I make a big mess!"


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## CallMeMommy (Jun 15, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jenners26* 
*When you find yourself watching iCarly and actually liking it long after the children are in bed. (Don't judge me...Spencer is hilarious!)









I have my DVR set to record new episodes of iCarly







And Spencer IS hilarious, he's the main reason I started watching in the first place!


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## gossamer (Feb 28, 2002)

You are trying to figure out how to explain to a three year old "why is my penis longer?"


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## 2pinks (Dec 20, 2007)

bathing is optional, not mandatory
a wild and crazy night is staying up past 10pm
sex? what's that?
pee and spit-up are the perfect accessory to any outfit
you trade your "adult" shows for noggin/sprout, etc and know all the songs by heart


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## mermaidmama (Sep 17, 2008)

When you find yourself bouncing/rocking/shushing your dog or cat while holding them at the vet's.


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## Ellen Griswold (Feb 27, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *heidirk* 
well, he says it tastes good. . .









he likes to eat lotion in general, though. . . and I don't know why.









My cat likes to eat lotion. Maybe they should get together?


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## Smokering (Sep 5, 2007)

Quote:

When you realize how much time you wasted before you had your baby!
Oh, yes. Goodness, yes. The worst part is, I was a stay-at-home non-mother for four months before I had the baby... I had no excuse for not doing, like, everything under the sun.







If only I could go back in time and give myself a kick in the pants...

And on a related note: you know you're a parent when you seriously consider polyphasic sleep in an effort to get more hours out of the day.


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## JJ'sMom (Mar 11, 2005)

when in laws share their "..so I licked it and it was poo" stories, you say "I haven't YET." but totally understand how it happens now.

"please put you penis away" and "stop wiping your penis on the couch." are often uttered without raising an eyebrow.









and a stroller walk means that both you and dc push your own stroller....no dc in the stroller.


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## TwinsTwicePlusTwo (Dec 7, 2008)

*When you're in the habit of pulling your skirt up to your knees and looking down before you start walking, to make sure there's no-one hiding under it

*When glitter has become contraband that will not enter your house on pain of death

*When you spend five minutes looking for your kids in the mall, only to remember that you're actually shopping alone, for once (except I was shopping for maternity clothes!







)

*When you're kneeling in the driveway scrubbing melted chocolate out of the Mercedes' beige carpet, only to have someone come up behind you and squirt you in the butt with the garden hose


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## Jojo F. (Apr 7, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *geiamama* 
You know you're a parent when your hot drink is always stone cold by the time you drink it and you eat biscuits (cookies) _really quietly_ in teh kitchen so that you don't have to share!







:


Yup!!

Or when you get peed on and you think, it's OK, it will dry


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## MaxMommy (Feb 16, 2007)

OOHHHH I can so relate, great thread









Catching vomit....check
sleeping in pee............check
sniffing, not licking to check for chocolate or poo.......check
eating spit food (gnawed donuts, bagels, etc).......check
covering everyong all night long...............check
booboo kisses to all..............check
singing kid songs all day.......check
washing faces with thumb and spit........check
more penis talk than I could ever imagine............check
feeling cheeky for staying up past ten...........check
sex????????............check
helping grown up friends cross the road..........check

and to add........getting a reputation at work for ensuring collegues have nutritious snacks.

doing up DH's jacket zipper without noticing till he informs me he's a big boy and can do it himself.


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## pixiekisses (Oct 14, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MaxMommy* 
doing up DH's jacket zipper without noticing till he informs me he's a big boy and can do it himself.

Oh yeah! Or buttoning his shirt.


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## BarnMomma (Dec 12, 2008)

love these!

Some of our favorites phrases
"(insert object name here) don't go on penises!"
"Paint goes on paper, not on (mommy, cat, walls, shoes, or any other nearby surface)"

YOu know you're a parent when
-when you shower, if you shower, you do so with a toddler, a plastic lobster, a ball, three cups, measuring spoons, and a train at your feet.
-date night often consists of a 10 minute conversation with DH at the kitchen table while DS plays in the den
-you think that people who sleep in all the way until 7AM are just plain lazy
-10PM is unreasonably late for any human being to be awake
-your once stylish home is now barren of decorations becasue they are "unsafe"
-you get excited over backhoes, skid steers, and john deere tractors because DS likes them
-you have no clue what's going on in pop culture "Jonas who? He has a brother? whatever."
-you listen to kid music even when no kids are in the car
-Sex is something you read about once in a magazine


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## Frootloop (Aug 10, 2007)

My LOs aren't exactly LOs anymore.. they're almost 12 (in two days) and 15 yrs of age, but *OMG*, this thread has had me absolutely ROLLING in laughter this morning.. and because of that, I've had tons of memories coming back. Thanks for posting this thread!


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## darien (Nov 15, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Ellen Griswold* 
...when you have caught vomit in your hands without flinching.

...when you have nursed a child in a forward facing carseat while still being buckled in yourself.

...when you have to ask that underwear be worn at the dinnertable.

Done these-- more than once!









I really felt like a parent when I nursed a toddler, rocked an infant to sleep, and helped my 9 year old with math, all at the same time.


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## heidirk (Oct 19, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mermaidmama* 
When you find yourself bouncing/rocking/shushing your dog or cat while holding them at the vet's.











Quote:


Originally Posted by *Ellen Griswold* 
My cat likes to eat lotion. Maybe they should get together?









:

And from this morning. . .

I was reading a story to DS1 that happened to include a Water Buffalo, and he pulled out his penis. I told him that one day, his foreskin would roll back, and he'd be able to see the head underneath. He said, "The buffalo have a head, and my foreskin will roll back and there is a bufffalo head inside!"







:


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## Theoretica (Feb 2, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *heidirk* 
He said, "The buffalo have a head, and my foreskin will roll back and there is a bufffalo head inside!"







:

Might want to mention that to his girlfriend in a few years


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## heidirk (Oct 19, 2007)

definate blackmail material!


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## AFWife (Aug 30, 2008)

This morning I cleaned up baby puke at 5am and didn't bat an eyelash... It had even soaked into the sheet where he was sleeping so I just got him something dry to sleep on, rocked him a bit, and went right back to sleep. When we woke up later I realized that the bed still had that faint "puke scent" and I'd slept right through it; a year ago I would have changed the sheets because I'd have been sick.


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## EnviroBecca (Jun 5, 2002)

...when you listen to the Sesame Street Christmas album twice on Easter Sunday (and every day after that, for nearly two weeks so far).


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## Jojo F. (Apr 7, 2007)

Speaking of wiping things









...."Don't wipe your boogers on (your sister, the dog, the cat, the walls, the counter, me!!)"

And when you can ask "Where did this poop come from?!" (it was smeared on the wall next to the toilet AND on the seat) and know very well who it came from. DS "found" it smeared on his leg one day and could not figure out how it got there!














:

Oh, and when your DVD player freezes because you have watched the same Spongebob movie over, and over, and over again. We had to take the DVD player apart to get the beloved movie out


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## CrunchyChristianMama (Dec 5, 2008)

"The buffalo have a head, and my foreskin will roll back and there is a bufffalo head inside!"

Ok that is the funniest thing I've heard in a long time.


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## claddaghmom (May 30, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *AFWife* 
When I first found out I was pregnant I was watching an episode of CSI that involved a child being molested and killed...I had to watch it in short pieces because it was so disturbing.


Oh yeah, DH and I watched the one where the baby was abducted (turned out to be the Mom's lover).

The whole scene was very disturbing (mom was held back while they ran off w/ her child).


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## VBMama (Jan 6, 2004)

...when you it feels weird to type with two hands because you're usually NAKing or holding someone and typing with the other.


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## lemurik (Jul 26, 2007)

...when any phone conversation is interrupted constantly with phrases like: Don't eat the pen, you are not a dinosaur (our favorite), please put the garbage back into the bin, as well as answering the question "who are you talking to?" about 10 times in 2 minutes


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## tjjazzy (Jan 18, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *VBMama* 
...when you it feels weird to type with two hands because you're usually NAKing or holding someone and typing with the other.

*nods* i get really excited when i get to type with 2 hands!!

*when you barely notice the baby smears across your glasses anymore; just peer around them to type


----------



## Breeder (May 28, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *EnviroBecca* 

...your walls are covered in signs that say things like,
"GRANDDAD AND TRAINS"
"I AM A BUNNY YOU ARE A ROBOT"
"POLICE PLEASE POLICE PLEASE FLEECE FLEECE FLEECE"
"MY SHOULDER IS HURTING"
"STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE!"
"FLOATING ALIEN JELLYFISH"
"THOMAS WAS WORKING IN THE QUARRY"
"STEELERS ARE WINNING"
"BARACK OBAMA IS WINNING"

because your child is learning to write and keeps asking you to spell words for him to write and wanting to hang up his signs, and of course you want to encourage him, and it's only as you write this picturing the signs that you realize the events during which he wrote those last two signs were 3 and 5 months ago respectively.


Our kids should hang out! My six year old could spell words for your 4 year old and then they could both hang a million signs and pictures all over the walls together (the easter bunny brought J a roll of scotch tape, and he was delighted







)

Right now our walls say:

BONEVILLE AVENUE CAFE - YES WE ARE OPEN COME IN!!!!!
Cardinals - 53 Dragons - 80 Dragons WIN!
NO PARKING, Parking for the Football Game ONLY
Daddy thinks J is awesome, yes he does, of course he does, YES.
I'm Gonna Eat you FOR REAL!!!!! (accompanying a picture of a dragon)

and my personal favorite, hanging on his door:
No Babies Allowed


----------



## maddycakes (Apr 14, 2008)

- When you find yourself agreeing with your LO that, of course, looking out the front door is a perfect place to put the potty (certainly better scenery)

- When your LO eats a day old dried pea from under her high chair and you think, "well, at least it was a vegetable instead of fuzz this time"

- You purposely leave the house each morning at exactly 8:19AM so that we'll see the #245 bus on the way to daycare, just so you can hear that excited voice in the backseat yelling "bus!"

- You don't think twice when eating something that has already been halfway in someone's mouth...and it's not even your own kid!

- You realize how a mere 5 minutes can seem like an eternity when you're trying to explain to your 19 month old DD that we have to wait our turn for the swings at the park, (you of course try to pass the time by saying it in a loud enough voice so that the other parent who is unreasonably monopolizing the swing with THEIR LO for a whole 5 minutes can hear you







)


----------



## AFWife (Aug 30, 2008)

- You've ever tried to reason with a newborn "There's no way you're hungry. Mommy just fed you 10mins ago."


----------



## Jojo F. (Apr 7, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *AFWife* 
- You've ever tried to reason with a newborn "There's no way you're hungry. Mommy just fed you 10mins ago."

I did the same thing toda with my 3 month old!!

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Breeder* 
(the easter bunny brought J a roll of scotch tape, and he was delighted







)


Tape is a great gift for the creative child. Every year I get DS a BUNCH of tape and envelopes. He gets so psyched


----------



## St. Margaret (May 19, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *emamum* 
you can say things like.. "no, i dont want to see your penis" "please stop wiggling your penis at me" without blinking

i make up songs as well, her favourite is

"pooper trooper, gunna change your nappy, cos you stink of poo (pa pa poo pa pa) yes you really do (pa pa poo pa pa) its a good job i love you" (to the tune of super trooper lol)

My DD really likes ABBA, and so I sang this to my DD a few times the last two days, and she's been going about singing the first bit over and over. My whole family is cracking up. I came back just to check what you had made up for the rest so I can sing it all to her. Thanks for the fun!







:


----------



## GoGoGirl (Oct 13, 2008)

When you have to do the dishes in order of priority in case the baby wakes up...and you still can't decide which should be first priority--the coffee pot or the breast pump parts!


----------



## fireweed (Nov 27, 2007)

you know you're a co-sleeping mom to a toddler because you know exactly what it feels like to have your nipples stepped on.


----------



## artgoddess (Jun 29, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *GoGoGirl* 
When you have to do the dishes in order of priority in case the baby wakes up...and you still can't decide which should be first priority--the coffee pot or the breast pump parts!

When your child is a little older you can do the coffee pot with confidence. My DD can sit on the counter and nurse while I wash the rest of the dishes.


----------



## momasana (Aug 24, 2007)

When you are riding in a car full of adults and pass a train and shout out "Choo-choo! Choo-choo!"


----------



## Kim Allen (Jun 28, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *fireweed* 
you know you're a co-sleeping mom to a toddler because you know exactly what it feels like to have your nipples stepped on.

omg this happens every day and I was too embarrased to say anything because I thought I was alone on this one. It makes it so much worse when your have the pg sensitive nipple thing going on and your half alseep and BAM! they get squished.


----------



## Super~Single~Mama (Sep 23, 2008)

When trying to nurse lying down you wonder what that thing is between your shoulder blades and its a toy. Then you get up and realize that the whole bed is covered in toys....


----------



## proudmomof4 (Aug 29, 2006)

- you like to wear t-shirts in off-white because milk spit-ups don't show like they used to on your navy blue ones!

- empty jelly jars are campsites for tadpoles

- you have a hard time falling asleep after your youngest one has left the family bed


----------



## TEAK's Mom (Apr 25, 2003)

You feel a sense of camaraderie with your children's imaginary friends and have occasionally talked to them when the children in question are not around.


----------



## Mama2Jesse (Jan 5, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kim Allen* 
omg this happens every day and I was too embarrased to say anything because I thought I was alone on this one. It makes it so much worse when your have the pg sensitive nipple thing going on and your half alseep and BAM! they get squished.

My seven month old does this during his nightly yoga nursing. OUCH. Holy crud. *shudder*


----------



## demottm (Nov 15, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *emamum* 
you can say things like.. "no, i dont want to see your penis" "please stop wiggling your penis at me" without blinking

i make up songs as well, her favourite is

"pooper trooper, gunna change your nappy, cos you stink of poo (pa pa poo pa pa) yes you really do (pa pa poo pa pa) its a good job i love you" (to the tune of super trooper lol)

That is soooooo awesome!
Mine are: You have to put pants on to go outside.
And I respond to "Mama Dinosaurs" just as easily as I do mom.


----------



## eewieew (Jul 25, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *AFWife* 
- You've ever tried to reason with a newborn "There's no way you're hungry. Mommy just fed you 10mins ago."

i do this.
all. the. time.

i also provide a constant, running narrative to keep eden entertained....even even when i'm not w her apparently.


----------



## AFWife (Aug 30, 2008)

You have to force yourself to use "I" when in the company of others...you're so used to replacing it with "Mommy"


----------



## Agatha_Ann (Apr 5, 2009)

-when you refer to each other as Mommy and Daddy when there are no children around

-when the cashier at the store hands you a receipt and says "sign this" and you reply "please"

-you haven't seen alcohol or left home past 9 PM in years and years and yet your breasts are flashed around town at least once a day

-you have been awake for over 48 hours and the baby starts crying for the 18th time this night... you make eye contact, catch a glimpse of that smile, and realize you have never felt a love as overwhelming as this


----------



## mamakaikai (Apr 17, 2009)

When you realize that you are *those people* who you would never be like, and are completely ok with it (ie. think your baby's messy eating face pictures are adorable and you want to show them off, you talk about poo with friends at dinner...tried EC and stuck to it because it actually makes sense)

Dog treats in your pockets have been replaced by cheerios

your drama over what to wear out now consist of what will be best for breastfeeding

have loved more deeply than you ever knew was possible


----------



## AFWife (Aug 30, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Agatha_Ann* 
-you haven't seen alcohol or left home past 9 PM in years and years and yet your breasts are flashed around town at least once a day

laughup


----------



## gromero (Apr 14, 2008)

*When you worry about taking your ds to a park with a fire hydrant...he just might use it to go pee on instead of the bathroom (ds has been doing this lately and it is driving.me.nuts)

*When one of your boys gets all excited and screams for you to come to the restroom...to show you his "biggest poop EVER!"

*When your husband starts to kiss you on your neck and pulls back suddenly and asks if the baby has thrown up on your recently....and if you remembered to wipe it off....


----------



## emmalizz (Apr 14, 2009)

.


----------



## heidirk (Oct 19, 2007)

when your stomach growls in church, and everyone thinks it was the baby filling his diaper. . .


----------



## kirstenb (Oct 4, 2007)

When you go to work on Monday and when asked what exciting things you did this weekend, your answer is you went grocery shopping by yourself.


----------



## AFWife (Aug 30, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *heidirk* 
when your stomach growls in church, and everyone thinks it was the baby filling his diaper. . .









Funny side story...I took my DS to church for the first time today. We were doing communion and when the choir paused between songs he let out the biggest, nastiest sounding fart ever. I could have died!!


----------



## FLPanther (Jun 16, 2008)

when your (childless) company picks up a nugget of chocolate off the floor and realizes it's not ..... chocolate


----------



## heidirk (Oct 19, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *AFWife* 
Funny side story...I took my DS to church for the first time today. We were doing communion and when the choir paused between songs he let out the biggest, nastiest sounding fart ever. I could have died!!

just wait till he's three, and can announce after said fart. . ."Mommy, I pass GAAASSSSS!!!"


----------



## atlambert (Apr 22, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Jojo F.* 
These are great!!

When you get puked on and you don't even consider changing, just rub it in!!

When YOU smell like baby puke because it's still in your hair.

When you are bouncing/rocking your whole body when you aren't wearing your baby.

I rub it in, too!

Tonight, while DS started crying while DH was holding him, I started rocking/bouncing the bowl of lunch I was holding!


----------



## atlambert (Apr 22, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *AFWife* 
Funny side story...I took my DS to church for the first time today. We were doing communion and when the choir paused between songs he let out the biggest, nastiest sounding fart ever. I could have died!!

My DS did this our second time to church!

Mine:

...When you clip your nails shorter so your LO can chew on them without hurting his mouth.


----------



## crabbyowl (May 6, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *kirstenb* 
When you go to work on Monday and when asked what exciting things you did this weekend, your answer is you went grocery shopping by yourself.

Or when your husband asks what you did today you can't think of a single thing, and so answer lamely, "Well... I did the dishes...."














:

When you're holding an armful of laundry and have to stop for a moment to take care of something else, you start rocking it and even kiss it because the only other thing you hold like that is your baby.


----------



## heidirk (Oct 19, 2007)

I have actually kissed my own shoulder!


----------



## AmandaClare (Aug 22, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *kirstenb* 
When you go to work on Monday and when asked what exciting things you did this weekend, your answer is you went grocery shopping by yourself.

Yes. Grocery shopping alone is a rare treat for me.


----------



## Magali (Jun 8, 2007)

...when there is a little child on his hands and knees drinking out of the dog-cat water dish.


----------



## Mimi (Oct 8, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *kirstenb* 
You don't remember the last time you went to the bathroom with the door shut.

You exclaim "A bike!" every time you see one because DS is so infatuated with them, even when you are by yourself.

YES! both of these!
I don't remember the last time I peed without an audience!!
&

A DOG! look! It's a DOG! WOOF! WOOF!


----------



## Agatha_Ann (Apr 5, 2009)

-when you hand the baby to your DH so you can use the restroom and he has to come retrieve you because you have fallen asleep on the toilet


----------



## nerdymom (Mar 20, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *AFWife* 
- You've ever tried to reason with a newborn "There's no way you're hungry. Mommy just fed you 10mins ago."

! all the time with my 6 month old!

When you have dinner with two other couples, one who also has a newborn on their laps, the other couple is newly engaged. The parents talk about poop the whole meal, then your LO (who has been nursing this whole time) spits up all down your back (which also lands on the floor with an audible SPAT), and the un-parents get up and politely exit. Later on, clearing the dishes, you realize that the un-parents didn't finish half their food. And they aren't interested in coming to dinner the next week.


----------



## KJoslyn78 (Jun 3, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Jojo F.* 
When you are bouncing/rocking your whole body when you aren't wearing your baby.

I rock anything - i could be standing in line at the store, without kids, not holding anything, and still be swaying back and forth







:

Quote:


Originally Posted by *SkyMomma* 
When you find yourself spelling out words to your DP, no kids in sight.

If it wasnt for kids - my spelling would still stink! Thanks to kids - i can spell anything now (no - i'm not kidding - my spelling is terrible, and it actually has improved since having kids!)









Quote:


Originally Posted by *mamatoablessing* 
...when you're not sure if the brown spot on your arm is chocolate or poop and then you lick it to find out.

Sniff it first - that's what i do!









Quote:


Originally Posted by *heidirk* 
well, he says it tastes good. . .








he likes to eat lotion in general, though. . . and I don't know why.









My middle child ate stick deodorant when she was 2 1/2 - LOL - apparently that taste good too (or maybe it was the scent of it?). Poison control assured me, 3 times i called in, that she'd have to eat more then 1 stick to be poisoned (good to know!

which adds: You have Poison control on speed dial!!

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jojojojojo* 
* When you find yourself listening to or singing kids' songs even when there's nobody else around.

Doesn't ever grown adult love Laurie Berkner?







:


----------



## Amys1st (Mar 18, 2003)

When you and DP are driving in the car with no children but there is a CD playing singing "the wheel on the bus go...." and you dont realize for at least a mile, YOU DONT HAVE TO PLAY THIS!!!!

When most of the DVR recordings are of kid shows

you have picked up vomit. A lot.

When both of you are so tired and DH mixes breastmilk into his coffee without even realizing it. Yes, done this.

When you can have a serious discussion regarding peeing and pooping. Enough said.

You plan your day around the poop schedule and nap time.

When you use the term potty without children around.

When you make sure everyone including your DP has gone potty before leaving. and it is potty btw!!

Sleeping late is 7am. Going to bed late is 11pm

Going to a restrnt without menus that come with crayons is heaven.

You spend your extra money on webkinz.

You indoor/backyard decor is done by Little Tyke and Rainbow systems.

You can go into any room in your house and play.

You have Good Night Moon memorized. "and the quiet old lady whispering..."

You can now spell things quickly and to another adult and understand when they spell it out to you. Sadly, when you child is about 6, they can now understand too....

You have been kicked in the boobs, belly, crotch, leg, any other place by a 6 mo old cosleeper at your side. And so has DP. My DH has had his chest hair pulled etc.

You finally get a date night out and all you guys talk about is your L/O!

I could go on and on....


----------



## meemee (Mar 30, 2005)

... when you no longer carry a purse coz it keeps getting full of rocks, stilcks and leaves.

instead you carry a wallet that has feathers adn little treasures like beads, confetti falling out of it.

my dd is 6 1/2. i am back in school full time so i have a heavy back pack. and i find myself still... STILL swaying if i hold the backpack in front if i had to take something out.

... when your grammar dramatically improves.


----------



## gabysmom617 (Nov 26, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *tjjazzy* 

*when you barely notice the baby smears across your glasses anymore; just peer around them to type









Oh god yes. The grabby six month old and his giant, usually slobbery, Hulk strengthed hands and my glasses. good times.

You know you are a parent of a grabby infant when you've just put away the dangly earrings for the time being and went with studs, or none.


----------



## gabysmom617 (Nov 26, 2005)

When you find yourself making a round of calls to all the important people in your life, (i.e., daddy at work, grandma on her cell, grandad at work, and best friend who is also a mother) to allow the little one to make the all-grand announcment of:..

a successful poop on the potty.








:


----------



## BekahMomToOliver (Oct 31, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *fireweed* 
you know you're a co-sleeping mom to a toddler because you know exactly what it feels like to have your nipples stepped on.









That was me this morning!

*You catch yourself clarifying that "Teeth are for _food_, not friends."

*You regularly find yourself going to the bathroom while someone is sitting on your lap.

*You've noticed that most injuries and illnesses occur outside of your family doctor's office hours.


----------



## heidirk (Oct 19, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Amys1st* 

When both of you are so tired and DH mixes breastmilk into his coffee without even realizing it. Yes, done this.

You plan your day around the poop schedule and nap time.

You have Good Night Moon memorized. "and the quiet old lady whispering..."


well, I've never mixed breastmilk into coffee, but I have been so tired that I've done the following. . .

poured water into my coffee, poured powdered creamer into my cereal, and I actually salted my coffee once, by mistake. The sad part is, I was so sleep deprived, I didn't notice until halfway through the cup!









and I thought everyone's day revolved around the poop schedule. . . right?









at our house it was 'Hippos Go Berserk' !


----------



## gabysmom617 (Nov 26, 2005)

I just found myself having a straightfaced conversation with hubby over who does Funkytown better, Kid Bopz or Alvin and the Chipmunks...

eta: Definitely the Chipmunks. Twas unanimously decided.


----------



## darcytrue (Jan 23, 2009)

They never leave and no one else can do anything for them unless you approve of it first. Oh and being the mother of a teenager right now makes me feel a lot like a parent. It's odd to have my child talk to me about things that only a child can say to a parent and make me feel so old. I didn't feel so old until he became a teen and now I suddenly feel like I felt about my mother when I was a teen.


----------



## steelmagnolia9 (May 4, 2009)

-You find that you no longer care what's happening on "Grey's Anatomy" because your LO is so much more entertaining.

-You don't even mind being up at 2:00am because it's LO's favorite time to "talk".

-Even when you get the chance, you just can't bear taking a bath alone because you know how much LO loves to take one with you.

-You now speak to everyone in a high pitched voice.

-You can make dinner, hang/fold laundry, clean house, type, etc. all with one hand (and sometimes find yourself only using one hand even when NOT holding the baby).


----------



## ians_mommy (Apr 5, 2008)

**You* get really excited when you find out Elmo is comming to the local concert venue and do not bat an eye at dropping $30/ticket.

*You firmly tell DH not to check the mail again because DS loves to do it

*Every decision is agonizing (vax, work, day care, food etc)

*You could kiss a slobbery mouth a thousand times a day and still yern for more

*Everything that used to seem so important no longer is...and everything that was neglected now means the world.

*You realiize that you really are someones *whole world*...and it is scary and wonderful all at once


----------



## HarperRose (Feb 22, 2007)

I relate to SO MANY of these!!!









Quote:


Originally Posted by *Agatha_Ann* 

-you haven't seen alcohol or left home past 9 PM in years and years and yet your breasts are flashed around town at least once a day

THIS takes the cake. Truly.







:


----------



## HarperRose (Feb 22, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *BekahMomToOliver* 
*You regularly find yourself going to the bathroom while someone is sitting on your lap.

Or in your chosen baby carrier, front or back.


----------



## hippiemommaof4 (Mar 31, 2008)

you realize that your kids are little anarchists always trying to overthrow the parental government ROFL!! I'm pretty convinced this is true with my oldest at least lol.


----------



## hippiemommaof4 (Mar 31, 2008)

thomas the tank engine is some kind of god and you go out of your way and budget to get the ones your kids dont have lol


----------



## Ellen Griswold (Feb 27, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *hippiemommaof4* 
thomas the tank engine is some kind of god and you go out of your way and budget to get the ones your kids dont have lol

Yes, yes and YES!!!!

You also know everywhere in town that they are sold so that these places can be avoided when the budget is empty. You might also drive out of the way so these same places aren't passed.


----------



## gabysmom617 (Nov 26, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Ellen Griswold* 
Yes, yes and YES!!!!

You also know everywhere in town that they are sold so that these places can be avoided when the budget is empty. You might also drive out of the way so these same places aren't passed.

OR! Or, maybe it's Lightning McQueen. And you know where they are sold and you know how much they cost at each location down to the tax, and which store has different new ones, and you know which store has the same old classic ones, and know exactly where to go to get the brand new, just out, much coveted pooped-in-the-potty blue dinoco Lightning Mcqueen, which is a different store that you would go to to get one to replace the old loved-till-the-paint-is-chipped-off, or lost plain old Doc Hudson that you've been begged and pleaded with to find or fix for the past 2 weeks.


----------



## SamI'mNot (Mar 29, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Agatha_Ann* 
-when the cashier at the store hands you a receipt and says "sign this" and you reply "please"


Quote:


Originally Posted by *fireweed* 
you know you're a co-sleeping mom to a toddler because you know exactly what it feels like to have your nipples stepped on.


Quote:


Originally Posted by *Jojo F.* 
Or when you get peed on and you think, it's OK, it will dry










Quote:


Originally Posted by *EnviroBecca* 
...an open box of cookies or candy lasts two months in your household because if you eat one in front of your child, he'll want one, and you don't want to argue about how he didn't eat the nutritious dinner and you did, and then when he does eat a reasonable meal he is full and doesn't think to ask for a cookie, and you have hidden the box to avoid hearing him whine about wanting some, so you never have an opportunity to eat them and forget that they exist!
...you take down the piece of aluminum foil with a Bandaid stuck on it that was taped to the wall above your bed for several weeks after your child was "decorating", and you carefully put it aside so that if he notices its absence and throws a fit, you can show him you did NOT throw it away.

HHAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!!!!














: I thought I was so alone on all of these! I've never laughed so hard in my life! The "catching vomit" thing?







That hit so close to home I may just cry!

A few of my own:

-I sneak my MDC posts because if DD catches me I'll have to play with the smilies for an hour or she'll make "the face". You know the face...







with a little







. Ugh!
-Every time I hear a toilet flush I yell "Did you wash those hands?". EVERY time. No matter where I am.








-When I fix a plate of food, I automatically grab 2 forks.
-I check every day before work to be sure that the 10 Monkeys haven't decided to relocate from their Barrel to my purse.


----------



## JD5351 (Sep 13, 2008)

Still waiting for my kiddo to be born..(15 days..yay!)

But yesterday at dinner, my friends 2 year old sat next to me, and he was eating a piece of fried mozzerella...He took too big of a bite, so he started gagging on it. So I held out my hand and he spit the slobbery piece of half chewed fried mozzerella out. I didn't even flinch. LOL


----------



## lemurik (Jul 26, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *gabysmom617* 
When you find yourself making a round of calls to all the important people in your life, (i.e., daddy at work, grandma on her cell, grandad at work, and best friend who is also a mother) to allow the little one to make the all-grand announcment of:..

a successful poop on the potty.








:


----------



## lil_miss_understood (Jul 19, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *fireweed* 
you know you're a co-sleeping mom to a toddler because you know exactly what it feels like to have your nipples stepped on.


Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kim Allen* 
omg this happens every day and I was too embarrased to say anything because I thought I was alone on this one. It makes it so much worse when your have the pg sensitive nipple thing going on and your half alseep and BAM! they get squished.

Oh heck yeah.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Magali* 
...when there is a little child on his hands and knees drinking out of the dog-cat water dish.









:
We caught DS2 slurping rice milk off the floor trying to entice the cat to come lap it up with him.


----------



## LuckyTrish (Dec 29, 2008)

"Sorry! Sippy cups are not hammers!"


----------



## AFWife (Aug 30, 2008)

I'm packing to move back in with in-laws...As I'm talking through it while on the phone with DH I said, "...and that has pee on it..." and then stopped because it came out so casually


----------



## heidirk (Oct 19, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *JacquelineR* 
Oh heck yeah.








:
We caught DS2 slurping rice milk off the floor trying to entice the cat to come lap it up with him.


----------



## Peppermint Poppies (Jan 7, 2007)

You find yourself saying "please don't lick the dishwasher"


----------



## MrsAprilMay (Jul 7, 2007)

You're in the middle of the grocery store when you notice that you haven't latched your nursing bra back into place.

And when you've caught vomit in your hands.


----------



## ericswifey27 (Feb 12, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *emamum* 
you cheer when the baby poo's







:

or when you go.

or when Daddy goes.

or when Big Brother goes.

LOL.

In our house there is an elaborate, never-the-same-twice dance/song that occurs.


----------



## Mrs.Burke (May 14, 2009)

You only comb your hair once (that was only after bathing)


----------



## heidirk (Oct 19, 2007)

or you are out in public when you realise everyone's hair got combed that day except yours!


----------



## Emily's Mama (Apr 22, 2007)

You talk to your child's favourite stuffed animals, even when you are alone with them!

We couldn't find DD's very loved green stuffed froggy. When I found him out on the street in front of the house, I picked him up and dusted him off and kind of cuddled him and said something like, "Oh, there you are. We were very worried about you", before even realising I was talking to a toy like he was my son!!


----------



## dachshund mom (Dec 28, 2007)

You cry at the thought of having another one as your overtired baby screams and won't fall asleep, then moments later she's peacefully sleeping in your arms and you cry at the thought of never getting to do this again.

You consider duct taping your dogs' ears to his head (because he keeps standing right next to the finally asleep baby and shaking them and the flapping wakes her up).

You wonder why the ceiling fan is so much more interesting than you are.


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## AFWife (Aug 30, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *dachshund mom* 
You wonder why the ceiling fan is so much more interesting than you are.

Or the window..

Or the beam in the ceiling...

Or the wall...


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## lil_miss_understood (Jul 19, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *heidirk* 
or you are out in public when you realise everyone's hair got combed that day except yours!









Or when you get home and THEN realize you forgot to comb your hair that day.


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## PatienceAndLove (Jan 5, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *heidirk* 
at our house it was 'Hippos Go Berserk' !









One hippo all alone
Calls two hippos on the phone
Three hippos at the door
Bring along another four
Five hippos come over dressed
And give hippos show up with a guest!
Seven hippos arrive in a sack
And eight hippos sneak in the back
Nine hippos come to work
and ALL THE HIPPOS GO BESERK!
All through the hippo night
Hippos play with great delight
But at the hippo break of day
All the hippos go away
Nine hippos and a beast join
Eight hippos riding east
While seven hippos going west
Leave six hippos quite distressed
Five hippos then set forth
With four hippos headed north
Three hippos says "good day"
And the last two hippos go their way
One hippo, alone once more
Misses the other fourty-four

Wow... I cannot believe I just remembered that without help!


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## pixiekisses (Oct 14, 2008)

When your stick blender suddenly gets dropped out of the 7th floor window, and for some _strange_ reason doesn't work anymore.


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## bonnie risser (May 15, 2009)

you know when your a parent when you have a break from the kids you still find yourself watching the cartoons.


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## heidirk (Oct 19, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *PatienceAndLove* 
One hippo all alone
Calls two hippos on the phone
Three hippos at the door
Bring along another four
Five hippos come over dressed
And give hippos show up with a guest!
Seven hippos arrive in a sack
And eight hippos sneak in the back
Nine hippos come to work
and ALL THE HIPPOS GO BESERK!
All through the hippo night
Hippos play with great delight
But at the hippo break of day
All the hippos go away
Nine hippos and a beast join
Eight hippos riding east
While seven hippos going west
Leave six hippos quite distressed
Five hippos then set forth
With four hippos headed north
Three hippos says "good day"
And the last two hippos go their way
One hippo, alone once more
Misses the other fourty-four

Wow... I cannot believe I just remembered that without help!









:







:







: Yay! I'm not weird!


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## lifeguard (May 12, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MrsAprilMay* 
You're in the middle of the grocery store when you notice that you haven't latched your nursing bra back into place.

OMG - I cannot even count how many times this has happened to me!!!


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## preshpb (Aug 21, 2013)

I so love love this thread! I have laughed so much and so hard my ribs hurt! GOODNESS.
· you go to a friends house and see a knife, toothpick, breakable item on the counter and you move them out of the way even when your friend has no kids and yours are at home.


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## preshpb (Aug 21, 2013)

Having to explain to a 3 old how baby ended up in your tummy. Having to say " no honey, I didn't swallow the baby" when they wonder how it's got in your tummy if you didn't get it in through your mouth.


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