# Would you let your 12 y.o. go to play paintball?



## Maracita (Nov 28, 2001)

Hi everyone,
do you have a son or someone you know who has done this? What are your thoughts? This concerns my 12 y.o. stepson, and I have been looking at websites and we have been discussing it all afternoon. One idea I had was to maybe let him go, but also do something live-affirming and 'good' as a counteraction.
He does play some mildly violent videogames already etc. but he is an intelligent and smart boy and not at all violent. He just lookes at it as a fun game and his best friend (13) has permission. What would you do, or what more questions would you ask?
Thanks.
Mara


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## Lilac (Jul 5, 2003)

As long as he sees it for what it is supposed to be - just a fun game - I don't really see a problem with letting him go. You say he's an intelligent boy and non-violent. He probably just wants to go and have a good time with his friends. I doubt that an afternoon of paintball will turn your son into a violent killer in real life. At his age, he knows the difference between a game and reality. Let him try it, but I'd observe his behavior afterward. If you notice his behavior becomes more aggressive or violent after playing, I wouldn't let him go again.


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## ja mama (Sep 6, 2003)

Let him go play


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## Maracita (Nov 28, 2001)

We did let him go, he had fun, but he did become sick afterwards, probably just a coincidence though.
thanks!


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## Yamilla (Oct 8, 2003)

What a cool mom to let him go though. I agree -- boys need somewhere for their energy to go. Bet my ds would be so jeleous if he knew what paint-ball was!


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## birthpartner (Dec 8, 2003)

My son now 16 played since he was 12. He has some expensive gear, the last pb gun was over 500. He had a good time, it provided lots of exercise and socialization. Just don't look at his back when he gets home! He recently got a licence and wanted to put his investment into a car--sold the gun he had worked for and gave up the paintball. His friends all gave it up too. Now he's addicted to the computer game tribes. Boys will be boys, let him play.


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## MaryKate (Dec 6, 2003)

We have some friends that have two boys ages 8 and 11 and both have been playing paintball for the last month or so . Their dad invited some other families over and they all play together in the woods by thier house. As long as your son plays by the rules and doesn't get too wild I am sure he will have alot of fun!I have been wanting to join them . I think it sounds like alot of fun!


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## the sunshine (Jul 31, 2003)

My 13-yr old wanted to. I asked around and did a little research, and decided against it. A LOT of people said they got hurt. It's pretty painful if you get hit, so they tell me.

Plus it's very expensive.


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## phathui5 (Jan 8, 2002)

I just wanted to add that laser tag might be a good alternative for people who don't want their kids to get hurt. My brother plays it.


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## applejuice (Oct 8, 2002)

My youngest DS plays paintball: he earned part of the gear from working around the house.

He enjoys the game.


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## Meiri (Aug 31, 2002)

Our municipal recreation department just had a paintball outing today for Middle School aged kids. We let DS go and he had fun.

I don't see this game as having to be non-life affirming. Some kids do grow up to be good police officers whose only goal in life is to protect the community. If the child has those talents and inclinations, those deserve nurturing just as much as music and art talents and inclinations.







Other times boys want to emulate those they see as heros. DS is very into learning about WWII. When he was younger much of his pretend play was as a firefighter. Acting out the work of such courageous heroes, even as he also learns about the horror that is war or fire, is part of growing up to be a Whole man IMO.

A wonderful poster I've seen in a couple of catalogs shows boys dressed for football gathered around another who is playing his violin. The caption "Nurture the Whole boy." just says it all for me.


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## PancakeGoddess (Oct 8, 2004)

ooold thread, but we're considering paintball. Anyone care to chime in with more detail?

also, meiri, I'd like to know more about the catalogs you saw that poster in.


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## smillerhouse (Aug 5, 2006)

Paintball is actually postive in a number of ways. My son, 16 is more into cars,etc. now but it is interactive and lots of running and being outside. It is like a real live strategy game. The field taht he goes to enforces ceratin standards so it is less crazy tahn soem of the soccer teams he was on. He loves mechanical things. My daughter has played a few times too. The chaallenge is what he likes. He has done speedball,scenario games,etc. Sallie


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## Yoshua (Jan 5, 2006)

Not a problem so long as it's supervised by an adult.


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## enkmom (Aug 30, 2004)

I did not allow my son to play. The idea of going out and "hunting" your friends with guns does not sit right with me.


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## momuveight2B (Mar 17, 2006)

Absolutely! My sons and husband play paintball and it is well supervised. One of my daughters also plays. They need to wear goggles, long pants and shirts and usually hats. It does hurt if you get hit but the kids consider those to be their war wounds. In a well supervised game no one should be hit at close range or in the face. I think they are supposed to aim for legs and arms; they are tagging to get the other team out. Once you are hit you surrender. My younger sons have never been hit by a paintball at all cause they move too fast.


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## momuveight2B (Mar 17, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Maracita* 
We did let him go, he had fun, but he did become sick afterwards, probably just a coincidence though.
thanks!

Maybe not, here it is a rite of passage to eat a paintball before the game. They are non-toxic but no way would I put one in my mouth.


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## The4OfUs (May 23, 2005)

I played once in college and had a blast, even though I had welts on my legs from a couple of the hits. I'd let a 12-y-o go, sure, so long as there was goign to be adequate responsible parental supervision at the venue - just be sure he knows he might get some welts if some of the balls hit him a certain way (or maybe they're better made now than they were in the stone ages when I went.







).


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## PajamaMama (Dec 18, 2004)

My daughter is 11 and while she does not play paintball, she does play laser tag in an arena-like setting occasionally. She has a lot of fun and the 'hunting your friends' thing that a pp mentioned...would you let your kids play Hide And Seek?


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## enkmom (Aug 30, 2004)

I said hunting your friends with guns. Hide and seek is a completely different thing. I am all for group games like hide and seek, capture the flag, and scavenger hunts. I just don't think you need to have a gun in your hand to have fun. If paint-ball is for you, have fun. I don't allow it here.


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## UnschoolnMa (Jun 14, 2004)

Sure. My kids would enjoy it I think.


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## SandraS (Jan 18, 2007)

Absolutely. My 13 year old has been going for about three years.


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## orangefoot (Oct 8, 2004)

My 13 yo is small compared to his peers but he went paintballing a couple of months ago and had a great time. He is a very very non physical and non violent boy who is known for defending other kids against bullies and breaking up potential fights with his quick wit and smooth tongue. He has not been transformed into a different or aggresive child after one session of paintball.


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## RBinTEX (Apr 16, 2004)

I have two nice, non-violent boys who love paintball! We live on five wooded acres, so sometimes we have a dozen boys back there shooting each other!







: My biggest rule is always wearing a mask. Those little paint balls can leave a bruise the size of a quarter, and could certainly take out an eye. Nobody plays here without a mask. I've got plenty of padded jackets, but I'm not so strict about making them wear those. They do get hot in the jackets, and a little bruise is not life threatening. DH plays with them too. Sometimes they get a game of dads against sons. That can be pretty funny to watch! (The boys always win! Those old men are too slow!)


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## mommy68 (Mar 13, 2006)

My oldest is 11 and I would let him go. In fact, we've talked about going together with a couple of his friends from school. I would like to do it as well. It sounds like fun to me.







:


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## DvlDg (Sep 4, 2006)

I've been paint-balling before, it's a load of fun. I've been shot and unless you're in point blank range it doesn't really hurt. I have been shot point blank and it hurts for a minute.


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## Susie1 (Mar 3, 2007)

It is quite expensive, but if money is not an issue, then why impose limits? I do not think there is a correlation between those who enjoy paintballing, lasertag or squirtgunning and higher rate of incarceration due to violent crimes. Personally, I think prohibition is a breeding ground for resentment (and sneakiness).


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## MyckelsMommy (Sep 23, 2006)

We used to do paintball as a family activity! Well, when I was younger, with my dad and 2 brothers, and some other cousins and uncles. I think I was the only girl that was playing that I can remember. I was kinda the tom-boy type girl who got along more with the boys. I have 2 of my own paintball guns my dad bought me for Christmas gifts. When DS gets older, I would for sure let him play, I would even join him maybe


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## Jessy1019 (Aug 6, 2006)

I expect both my kids to play at some point. Their dad just got into it and it's a very popular thing among our local friends (farming area lots of acreage, etc). The 13 yr old girl next door and I just decided that we're going to start playing with the guys the summer (her boyfriend and my partner play together). I'm scared of how much it might hurt, but if my kids knew what to expect, I wouldn't think anything of letting them play.


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## Profmom (Feb 13, 2002)

No no no. No way. But my son refused on his own when invited. And I have to say I am shocked to read the 'boys will be boys' line at MDC. My son is a boy and he has no interest.

Guns kill. Our society is already tragically violent. Just read the news. When are we going to wake up???


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## Maggi315 (Aug 31, 2003)

yes, i would definitely let him go and if I could, I would go too. I think paintball is fun!


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## nextcommercial (Nov 8, 2005)

As long as it wasn't in a big open forest, where he might get lost. (one of my unreasonable fears) Then, yes. I would.

BUT, if I noticed behaviors that I didn't like, I might not let him go again.


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## jeanieloz (Sep 30, 2004)

They do play paintball, and airsoft, the boys have a blast, capture the flag is also a favorite of my boys.
Have fun with it. Not all boys will be into this kind of stuff, and some girls have a blast with it. I had my BB gun with me everywhere I went for almsot 4 straight years as a kid.
Donna


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