# Miscarriage Pill???



## ladybugamber (Feb 28, 2006)

A friend of mine called yesterday to say that she had a miscarriage. She was 8 weeks along. I am a little confused on a few things... One, she said that they were giving her a pill to "flush" everything out. When she takes the pill she has to stay in bed for 2 days and then return with the fetus. (sorry so graphic)

I always thought they did a D&C when they learned the baby didn't have a heartbeat? I'm seriously confused... can anyone explain this pill to me?

Also... what do I say to her? I dont know what to say except I'm sorry.. we were both due at the same time and I dont know what to say to her...







:

**I wasn't sure where to post this at... sorry if it's on the wrong board.


----------



## messy mama (Jan 14, 2005)

I'm so sorry to hear about your friend.

They don't always do a D&C. The pill they gave her basically induces her body to let the baby go naturally. I forget the name of the pill.

You could ask her if she needs anything. Maybe make her a meal. Just try to be there for her. Does she have other children? Maybe you could offer to take them for a while, maybe to the park.

When I lost my baby, I didn't get responses from a lot people. But the ones I did get were so heartwarming.

I got a lovely card from my SIL's mother. I know her, but we're not close at all. When my mother had mentioned my loss to her, she said that she sounded genuinely heart-broken for me. I was so touched by her sympathy and thoughtfulness. I'm going to keep that simple card forever.

My sister made me this beautiful basket filled w/ all sorts of lovely things. An organic cotton robe, a scented candle and holder, lot's of organic apples (she knows apples are my favorite







) and some yummy organic, fair-trade chocolate. Oh and some Mad Libs for the boys. She also called occasionally just to say she was thinking about me and to see if I needed anything.

My mom took my boys to the flower shop and had them pick out a beautiful bouquet for me. Of course, she also came over anytime I called. She made dinner for us a few times. She was just there.

Also, some friends of mine that I hadn't seen in months stopped by with a beautiful plant.

I think _anything_ that shows you are thinking about her would be nice.


----------



## widdlelou (Feb 28, 2006)

Well it all just happend for me. But so far, sending a note or an ecard with something nice in it just saying that you are heartbroken for my loss. Acknowlegment of the loss and the saddness that I'm going through. And then dinners or lunches. Coming over and not just talking about the sadness but some simple distraction if she is ready (I'm not ready for friends yet, but it just happend yesterday but family was really nice to have over today). And seriously call and ask if you could do anything. there are little things I never thought about. LIke I compiled a list of poeple who knew I was pregnant and I asked her to call them and tell the the news. I dont' want to make that annocemetn more than I have to. And then food, I don't feel liek eating or cooking or for that matter anything really, and my daughter needs to eat and I do to I guess and my husband does too and he is mourning too so its hard for him, so food is great. And my Aunt brought over a nice bag for me. Its nice, tis nothing to remind me of a baby its just something for me, its cute and fun and it made me feel better. And another friend who I'm not as close to she sent me an ecard bascially as soon as she found out. AND It was a really thoughtful one and I have it actually saved so I can read it for some strength. And I need some time here and there and I dont' want my daughter totally surrounded by this sadness, she's two, she can't understand and so someone over so I can be by myself but they took her to playgroup so it was normalcy for her and then they took her to McDonalds for lunch and that was a blast. She is probably happier this week then ever, she's had playmates this week and early birthday presents since I cancelled her party.


----------



## levar (Jan 28, 2002)

I am still waiting to miscarriage. I am thinking about taking the pill your friend took. I've been waiting 3 weeks now.

The pill is something that begins with a C -- I am bad about names, sorry. The pill is much like a low-dose of petocin that dialates the cervix and begins uterin contractions. I've been told (and read) that as long as your 'healthy' you can wait-n-see. Or try a pill. Or schedule a D&C. (Depending on your own mental state, etc) I've also been told (and read) that your 'odds' of still needing a D&C after natural MC vs pill MC are about the same, FYI.

I was also told (and read) that the reason for returning with the fetus is so that the doctors can do tests to make sure of a bunch of things like: Is the health of the mother ok? If there have been multiple MCs, why? Etc. I was told it was my choice on bringing in the fetus or not and having the tests done or not, etc.

I have received a couple cards. I also made a small box for keepsakes. [Paper mache box that I pasted paper strips and flowers onto. Simple.] Except for that I have mostly received VERY understanding comments (or even just hugs) and offers of help-if-needed, etc. My best friend lost a baby at 20 wks and her MIL gave her an angel figurine. Each year on the anniversary MIL sends a nice card of rememberance too.

The other thing I have gotten is an AMAZING amount of is empathy... I never realized before just HOW many women have had MCs?!?! And even of those who haven't themselves, they know someone who has?! For me, not feeling "alone" has REALLY been the best help to my 'mental-ness' so far.


----------



## Alohamelly (Jul 1, 2005)

It was probably Cytotec. When I had found out my baby was gone, I scheduled a D&C but ended up m/c naturally before the scheduled time. Not everything came out and I ended up getting the pill in my behind. It was painful!

I don't know your friend and everyone is different, but just tell her you're sorry and be there for her if she needs you. When I miscarried, I didn't want to talk to or see anyone for weeks. I wanted to be left alone.


----------



## SamuraiMom (Nov 7, 2006)

It probably it Cytotec, but it is surprising to me that they would send her home with it. It's also called mysoprostol. It's not approved by the FDA and it can have severe side effects. I don't think that they would send her home with out very specific instructions. Look it up on-line. Maybe if you have the time you could go sit with her awhile, while she is going through this. I had my BF and my MW with me for my last one, and the one before that as well. They helped so much. After I passed my baby they got me into bed, covered me in blankets when I was shocky and shaky and brought me some light food, eggs toast and OJ, make sure she gets fluids. As well, if she does have major blood loss, which is possible, it will be good to have someone with her to get her to the hospital. I hope I am not scaring you, but the main point is that someone be with her while she's going through the physical part.


----------

