# She's having TWINS!



## ecstaticmama24 (Sep 20, 2006)

Kill me now... okay don't, I was being a little sarcastic. Today an aquantince (spelling?) of mine told me she is expecting in Feburary (when I was due), and with TWINS (I was supposed to have twins). I told her that I was supposed to have twins in February too, and then I absolutely lost it. I didn't mean to, it just happened.

I was at a baby show for business, so there were babies and pregnant mamas EVERYWHERE. I really held it together great until my "friend" came up inquiring about babywearing with twins. I thought I was going to just die. I still feel like that.

I started sobbing uncontrollably and had to hide behind my booth for a while.

I feel so horrible right now, I can't stop crying. I also feel a little bad for totally losing it on her today.

Will this ever ease? I can't even think of twins without feeling like this.


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## MI_Dawn (Jun 30, 2005)

Ohhhhhhhhh damn!









I'm so sorry!

I don't know why it's so unfair... I hate it, too!


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## jess_paez (Jul 5, 2008)

ughh it makes me feel odd at the thought that she asked you about twins and baby wearing. He-LLOOOOO?! wth? people do. not. think.
i'm so sorry, but i understand how you could break down, it's expected.


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## ecstaticmama24 (Sep 20, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jess_paez* 
ughh it makes me feel odd at the thought that she asked you about twins and baby wearing. He-LLOOOOO?! wth? people do. not. think.
i'm so sorry, but i understand how you could break down, it's expected.









I know, at first I assumed that she didn't know I lost twins and that was why I told her and also why she had inquired, but then she said that she did hear about it. She told me she didn't want to tell me either, but I think someone else told her I'd be fine. I LOVE spreading the babywearing love, but I just don't know if I can this time. I sent her a link to an informative site.


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## ladyjools (May 25, 2009)

((((hugs)))))) that must have been so hard.


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## Jules09 (Feb 11, 2009)

It's hard not to lose it. I lose it whenever I talk about Lachlan. I cried in front of everyone on the train the other day. I wish I could hold it together, but sometimes it's just too hard. I would have lost it in that situation too. I'm sorry she brought up something so emotional for you.


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## InstinctiveMom (Jul 12, 2004)

It's so unfair


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## jess_paez (Jul 5, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ecstaticmama24* 
I know, at first I assumed that she didn't know I lost twins and that was why I told her and also why she had inquired, but then she said that she did hear about it. She told me she didn't want to tell me either, but I think someone else told her I'd be fine. I LOVE spreading the babywearing love, but I just don't know if I can this time. I sent her a link to an informative site.










it's just not okay on any level to ask you about babywearing for twins! the ONLY exception is if you asked her about babywearing for twins and what she is planning on using or if she wanted any ideas.
but no. maybe i'm more cynical than most baby loss mamas







, but i've had my share of people doing/saying the wrong things. and instead of getting used to it, i get more and more mad.








i'm sorry that some people suck.


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## ecstaticmama24 (Sep 20, 2006)

Thanks everyone. Have I told you lately how much I appreciate you. Alot.

Thanks


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## Emerging butterfly (May 7, 2009)

I agree....there is nothing more insensitive than to ask a woman who has lost twins and will never get to enjoy all that it is about the excitement of ANYTHING regarding them. It just sucks.

So sorry your "friend" is such a dim wit.

from one twin loss mama to another...I hear your pain. ((HUGGING)) from afar...


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## momz3 (May 1, 2006)




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## hippy mum (Aug 12, 2006)

Ouch, I'm so sorry. I can't believe she didn't at least offer her sympathy first, especially since she knew. I don't know how you do it. Maybe take a break for awhile from the business part of things? I would find it too hard to be around all those babies and preg moms.


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## jess_paez (Jul 5, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Emerging butterfly* 
I agree....there is nothing more insensitive than to ask a woman who has lost twins and will never get to enjoy all that it is about the excitement of ANYTHING regarding them. It just sucks.

So sorry your "friend" is such a dim wit.

from one twin loss mama to another...I hear your pain. ((HUGGING)) from afar...

i've never been pregnant with twins, but i can definitely understand this. being pregnant with twins i can only imagine is pretty darn special. having one baby in your belly is amazing, but twins must be extra amazing. two babies, two loves and it's kind of in it's own special package. i'm so sorry both of you have had to endure the pain of not being able to see that through like you wished. it just sucks.


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## ecstaticmama24 (Sep 20, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *bbrandonsmom* 
Ouch, I'm so sorry. I can't believe she didn't at least offer her sympathy first, especially since she knew. I don't know how you do it. Maybe take a break for awhile from the business part of things? I would find it too hard to be around all those babies and preg moms.









I'm thinking I might have to, but really though, I am managing pretty well with mamas of singletons, because I know that that is not what I was going to have, know what I mean? But twins on the other hand, I can't even look at them, because that is what I was supposed to have.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jess_paez* 
i've never been pregnant with twins, but i can definitely understand this. being pregnant with twins i can only imagine is pretty darn special. having one baby in your belly is amazing, but twins must be extra amazing. two babies, two loves and it's kind of in it's own special package. i'm so sorry both of you have had to endure the pain of not being able to see that through like you wished. it just sucks.









That's the thing, it's so rare to even naturally have twins period. There's no way I'll ever experience that again, even if I do have more babies. I've never said I wanted twins, but now I want them so bad. And my dim wit of a friend gets them. grrrrrr.

Thank you too Sara, I'm sending you hugs too.









Thanks everyone for your support, seriously, I don't know what I would do without this board.


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## Amy&4girls (Oct 30, 2006)

How horribly difficult-I'm so sorry.


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## jess_paez (Jul 5, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ecstaticmama24* 

That's the thing, it's so rare to even naturally have twins period. There's no way I'll ever experience that again, even if I do have more babies. I've never said I wanted twins, but now I want them so bad. And my dim wit of a friend gets them. grrrrrr.

yeah..............







for me it is different because i get to try for my rainbow baby, and have a real good chance of everything working out and holding my real live baby in the end. it just doesn't work like that with you.......rainbow twins naturally just isn't thought of. and i am so sorry for that. i wish you could try again for the idea of twins that you fell in love with. life just isn't fair.







but then again, i guess you never know. i've learned that everything and nothing is impossible.


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## ecstaticmama24 (Sep 20, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jess_paez* 
yeah..............







for me it is different because i get to try for my rainbow baby, and have a real good chance of everything working out and holding my real live baby in the end. it just doesn't work like that with you.......rainbow twins naturally just isn't thought of. and i am so sorry for that. i wish you could try again for the idea of twins that you fell in love with. life just isn't fair.







but then again, i guess you never know. i've learned that everything and nothing is impossible.









My exact feelings.... I would love rainbow twins (naturally), but the reality is... not likely. But ya never know, stranger things have happened.

Thanks for totally "getting" it... you ladies rock.


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## jess_paez (Jul 5, 2008)




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