# When did you night wean?



## gottecat (Mar 14, 2008)

I am wondering when you night weaned if you did.


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## Chloe'sMama (Oct 14, 2008)

DD is 18 months and going strong. I don't think I will force it.


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## Mrsboyko (Nov 13, 2007)

We sort of pushed her to wean around 17 months, but it didn't fully happen till 18+ months. Basically I offered her a sippy of water if/when she woke. She was very angry the first few days and i did usually end up BF'ing her. Eventually she would take a few sipps of water and fall asleep. The only reson I did this is becasue I was newly pregnant and really exhausted.


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## gottecat (Mar 14, 2008)

I am really torn. I dont want to push him in any way.... But my husband is being deployed for a year in july. I would really like to get pregnant before he leaves. I am on my first cycle PP and i am on day 71.... So I am hoping it will help my fertility... but I hate feeling at all like I am neglecting my son in any way to have another baby...


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## tinuviel_k (Apr 29, 2004)

We night-weaned at 15 months, but continued breastfeeding until four years.

My daughter was waking up every 2-3 hours to breastfeed even at 14 months. I was literally losing my mind from lack of sleep. I couldn't breastfeed while sleeping, it took me 1/2 hour to get back to sleep each time we woke... I was not in a good place mentally after over a year of 5-6 hours of sleep a night.

I hung on until Denali was very established on solid foods, then gently night weaned over the course of a month. It was amazing: she went from waking four times a night to waking only once around 5am. I did breastfeed her to sleep and then when she woke up early in the morning if it was getting light. Usually she'd fall asleep again until 8am or so.

Night-weaning did not adversely effect our daytime breastfeeding relationship at all. My daughter loved to nurse until we weaned at four years old.


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## canadian Jess (Jan 17, 2009)

oh, I have to know something, you said that you gently night weaned your daughter over the course of a month. That sounds amazing to me. My DS wakes up 8 times a night and if there was a way I could break him of that gently I would love to. I'm about to wean him for good, in one shot cuz I don't think I can take it anymore, I really feel like I'm loosing it. My marriage is falling apart, my house is falling apart....I'm sure you remember how it all felt. Anyhow, if you have any tips I would so love to hear them. I don't want to put him through all the turmoil but I'm at my wits end, 8 times a night for the last two years!!! Okay, well, maybe not fully two years, when he was younger he did better, twice a night was his best but now at 22 months it's a record breaker with no signs of getting any better. ahhhhh.

oh, by the way he is BF and co sleeping, always has, but my own bed sounds so good. now when he wakes I nurse to sleep, he doesn't wake for long and can ususally pantly pull him off but it doesn't diminish his wakings.

thanks.


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## gottecat (Mar 14, 2008)

this is a good gentle way
http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/ap/sleep.asp


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## NicaG (Jun 16, 2006)

Dd is 14 months and still nursing 1-2 times a night. I am starting to think of nightweaning her, mostly because I am totally exhausted from interrupted sleep. I'll see how much longer I can hold out.


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## MummaLitt (Feb 21, 2008)

We actually weaned during the day first and then weaned completely. For about 2wks, i would only let him nurse when he first woke up in the morning. Then we cut that out too. But i think he was ready for it cause if we weren't at home, he had no interest in nursing during the day. And the night nursing was more for comfort then nurishment.


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## funkymamajoy (May 25, 2008)

Baby will be 1 on Jan 7 and we're starting to night wean now. Last week we moved him into the big kids' room and his night wakings went from constant to once (and on two blessed nights, none). I'm hoping he follows DD's pattern and starts to consistently STTN now that he's in another room.


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## fruitfulmomma (Jun 8, 2002)

I voted 'Don't'. Whenever they are ready to stop is when we stop. My 3yo doesn't night-nurse anymore but my 1yo does.


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## Lizafava (Nov 28, 2004)

We tried to night-wean my first at 16 months but that was way too early for him. We tried again at 18 months and had a slightly easier time. He was a horrific sleeper and after nightweaning was just a bad sleeper







He went on to nurse for over three years.

I nightweaned our second a little earlier that I think he was ready for. But I was getting ready to do an internship where would be away from him for 48 hours at a time and I felt like he needed to be ready. It went okay. He has times where he sleeps through the night now - hes 17 months. And other nights - like last night - where he sleeps like poop.

A major downside of all this with him is that *I* actually can't get him to sleep anymore even if I tried. But I think that has more to do with the internship.


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## Aries1985 (Feb 29, 2008)

I've been thinking about night weaning my 17 month old, but I don't think she's ready quite yet. She does not eat very many solids. However, I am SO ready to sleep more than 2 hours at a time! I'd really like to let her lead the way.


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## InMediasRes (May 18, 2009)

I nightweaned at 19 mo, although we started the process at about 16 mo. I was pregnant with terrible pregnancy insomnia and a nursing toddler who wouldn't take anything else but nu nus....ever. hour. He woke, nursed, went back to sleep. I took another 45 min to fall back asleep, and he woke 15 min later. I didn't feel like I had any other choice. It took a long time, and I did it as gently as I could, but I still wish I hadn't had to do it.


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## gottecat (Mar 14, 2008)

Bumping to top for more votes.


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## Lilly Milly (Nov 19, 2009)

I wish this poll included an option prior to 8 months so if there were other people who have had a similar experience to mine.

My LO is mostly nightweaned already and she's almost 5 months. I know it is unusual for an infant to NIGHT CLW this early, but she is doing that. Perhaps it is just a phase (for almost a month now). I liked bedsharing and cosleeping both and procrastinated moving my daughter out of the bed because I wanted to be close to her. If we had any room at all in our tiny bedroom she would be in the same room or sidecarred crib (she prefers it, honestly, we never CIO). We still do cosleep after her first morning wakeup.

She prefers her crib to cosleeping and literally cried every couple hours when bedsharing and when in her bassinet (too small, I think) and we never CIO or anything. At first I would just offer the breast but it became very clear that she wanted was her own space. We moved her to the crib and BAM she slept through the night and didn't need (or even want) to nurse from 10pm to at least 5. She still occassionally will want/need to and I feed her, but don't think that all babies HAVE to nurse at night up to 18 months. My 5 mo old usually doesn't and it is HER choice.

We did have her on a routine and did various things to get her used to her crib from 2 months to when we moved her at 4 months.


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## ChinaDoll (Jul 27, 2003)

DD stopped night-nursing on her own at 15 months, but I was pregnant

DS stopped sometime after 2.5 years, I think; we never 'night-weaned' though.


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## almadianna (Jul 22, 2006)

Nightweaning before a year is not a good idea IMO. Babies tummies are not really meant to not eat for 8 hours straight until they are older than a year. I dont nightwean until they are ready to, my oldest nightweaned at 2 or so, dont remember. My 16 month old is still going strong. I will not push it but I also refuse to nightwean before 12-15 months.


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## Ks Mama (Aug 22, 2006)

I voted 24 - 28.

With both my children, I very gradually introduced alternative methods of comforting in the middle of the night, after they turned two. We didn't officialy "nightwean" with any specific method or timeline - just let them mostly lead the way with my gentle guidance & suggestion.

For my daughter, it took about a month to go from waking every hour or two to waking once or twice per night. With my son, about a week to go from waking every few hours for milk to waking once. No crying.

Waiting until your child has a say in the matter always makes things go more smoothly. I was able to communicate my plan, what was making me uncomfortable, and ask their opinion & offer alternatives that I knew they could grasp & understand.

Also, you definitely don't want to nightwean prior to 1 year - its just not healthy. I still wake thirsty in the middle of the night, and I'm 34.


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## MommaCrystal (May 25, 2006)

I can't vote. Both my boys stopped night nursing around 8ish weeks old. At that point they just seemed to go back to sleep without it. So I went with it. No crying, co-slept. We'd just get the diaper changed and snuggle a bit a poof! Asleep!

And then a couple of weeks later they both started sleeping straight through for 8 or more hours.

But THEN, when they started walking... oye! They started getting up all hours of the night. That didn't really resolve until over 2 years old.

I wonder what baby #3 will do! Probably something TOTALLY different!


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## rzberrymom (Feb 10, 2005)

I nightweaned my DD at about 18 months. It took 2 nights, was incredibly easy, and so I knew she could handle it. If she had resisted, I would have waited another month or two and tried again.

I mainly waited until her molars and incisors came in all the way--they were so incredibly painful for her that I didn't think it was fair to try to nightwean her while they were coming in. At 18 months, she was also able to understand pretty well that mama just needed some more sleep at night. She was starting to develop some empathy by that age and could begin to understand why I felt I needed to nightwean her (something I don't think she could have done at a younger age).


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## echoecho1528 (Jul 29, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Lilly Milly* 
The thing is we never really DID anything but move her to a crib (she prefers it to cosleeping, honest, and we never CIO or anything). We moved her to the crib and BAM she slept through the night and didn't need (or even want) to nurse from 10pm to at least 5. She still occassionally will want/need to and I let her, but don't think that all babies HAVE to nurse at night up to 18 months. My 5 mo old usually doesn't and it is HER choice. FWIW.

I think the recent trends in parenting sometimes underestimate childrens capacity to learn. Why is it considered detrimental for a child to learn to eat more during the day and less at night? As long as you aren't using any harmful methods? They learn other things and it's a good thing. Maybe it's not right for a lot of babies, but I think it is for plenty.

HA! If only my child would LEARN to just eat more during the day and sleep at night. No offense, but it is hard to hear this from a woman who is lucky enough to have a child who basically STTN at 5 months. Do you have any other children? A baby who STTN at 5 months on their own accord, without being forced to CIO, is very rare. A child who STTN at 5 months on their own accord probably has a very easy-going temperament. I may just be very sensitive to the subject because my 22 mo is up every 1-3 hours at night to nurse, but just like you didn't do anything to HELP your child STTN at or before 5 months, there are many of us out there with toddlers who feel like we didn't do anything INHIBIT their sleep in any way. I think in this case it is personality, and until you have a child with a more "spirited" temperament, you won't understand the flip-side of the coin.







- stepping down.


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## AlishaB (Dec 15, 2009)

I nightweaned my first at 18 mos, or should I say "started" to nightwean, he finished nursing at night by 20 mos. (I used the Jay Gordon approach), as for this one I night weaned at 20 mos pretty much in 3 days because I am preggo, and the nursing feels like he is ripping me to bits... I am unsure if he is fully weaned, we may start up again.


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## MelW (Jan 13, 2005)

With my oldest I tried nightweaning at 20ish months during a bad bout of thrush and cracked nipples. I didn't nurse at night for two weeks, managed to get my postpartum period back and rarely slept at night the entire time!! As soon as it was morning, she would nurse and pass out and we would all go back to bed. Clearly she wasn't ready to sleep without night-nursing, and we went back to nursing 3-12x a night after that.

Shortly after she turned two, I bought her "magic pajamas" that would help her sleep through the night without nursing. The next night we nursed, brushed teeth, put on the pajamas and I rocked her to sleep. When she woke up and asked to nurse, I reminded her of the magic pajamas, she asked for a sip of water and some rocking and went back to sleep!! We woke up and rocked a few times a night for several tiring weeks, and after than usually just hugs or back rubs were enough to get her back to sleep. She was obviously ready and it only took a small "nudge" to nightwean, whereas my previous attempt was very frustrating for all of us.

I think that different kids are "ready" to sleep without nursing at different ages, and that when they are ready it can take very little effort to night-wean.


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## funkymamajoy (May 25, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *almadianna* 
Nightweaning before a year is not a good idea IMO. Babies tummies are not really meant to not eat for 8 hours straight until they are older than a year. I dont nightwean until they are ready to, my oldest nightweaned at 2 or so, dont remember. My 16 month old is still going strong. I will not push it but I also refuse to nightwean before 12-15 months.

I have to disagree. Like Lilly Milly, we recently stopped co-sleeping and the baby stopped waking at night. If his tummy wasn't ready to go all night, then he would wake up and I would feed him. But, most of the time, he doesn't. And we all have that one friend whose 6-week old sleeps all night.

Some babies don't need to nurse all night and sometimes night nursing is just a habit.


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## almadianna (Jul 22, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *funkymamajoy* 
I have to disagree. Like Lilly Milly, we recently stopped co-sleeping and the baby stopped waking at night. If his tummy wasn't ready to go all night, then he would wake up and I would feed him. But, most of the time, he doesn't. And we all have that one friend whose 6-week old sleeps all night.

Some babies don't need to nurse all night and sometimes night nursing is just a habit.

Yes we all do have that friend, this is usually the same friend (at least in my case) who ends up having issues with their supply with their baby needing to be supplemented for some reason...

So no, not all babies wake up to nurse when they are hungry. Mine did not. I had to wake her up to nurse or she would just sleep. While many children wake up when hungry many others do not. Currently I am helping a mama who thought the same thing until her daughter started falling off of the charts. Her supply was low and I am pumping her for child as well as mine while I am at work. I do not believe that weaning a child before a year is a good idea.


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## almadianna (Jul 22, 2006)

Putting my mod hat on here









The Family Bed and Nighttime parenting is a forum where we support each other during what is sometimes the most difficult part of parenting.

Please keep in mind the purpose of the forum:

Quote:

When a parent posts here to discuss struggles with co-sleeping and asks for advice *members should post with suggestions to ease problems and encouragement to support co-sleeping, not to advise against it*. Posts of that nature are not appropriate. If parents come to a decision that their child sleeps better in his or her own space, discussions here can be in support of how to best parent such a child at night in a nurturing way.
I also wanted to add that if you have any specific issues with the way that someone has posted in a thread that made you feel uncomfortable please report them to a moderator. While we do not strive to make anyone feel bad or to alienate anyone; our mission at MDC is to support parents in a way that is not against their ideals as attached parents while staying gentle to the children involved.

Please remember:

Quote:

Mothering.com is the website of natural family living and advocates natural solutions to parenting challenges. We host discussion of nighttime parenting, loving discipline, gentle weaning, natural birth, homebirth, successful breastfeeding, alternative and complementary home remedies, informed consent and many other topics from a natural point of view. We are not interested, however, in hosting discussions on the merits of *crying it out, harsh sleep training,* physical punishment, formula feeding, elective cesarean section, routine infant medical circumcision, or mandatory vaccinations.
Please let me know if you have any questions.

-Alma


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## LadyCatherine185 (Aug 12, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Lilly Milly* 
The PP gave me the courage to post. So, Thanks! My LO is mostly nightweaned already and she's almost 5 months. The thing is we never really DID anything but move her to a crib (she prefers it to cosleeping, honest, and we never CIO or anything). We moved her to the crib and BAM she slept through the night and didn't need (or even want) to nurse from 10pm to at least 5. She still occassionally will want/need to and I let her, but don't think that all babies HAVE to nurse at night up to 18 months. My 5 mo old usually doesn't and it is HER choice. FWIW.

I think the recent trends in parenting sometimes underestimate childrens capacity to learn. Why is it considered detrimental for a child to learn to eat more during the day and less at night? As long as you aren't using any harmful methods? They learn other things and it's a good thing. Maybe it's not right for a lot of babies, but I think it is for plenty.


Sounds to me like you just lucked out with a good sleeper.









I have many friends whose babies STTN from early on. They were just good sleepers. Nothing Mom or Dad did, like you. Just remember, _you are lucky that your child is a good sleeper_.. and your next child (if you are planning to have more) may not be such a good sleeper.

FWIW, we tried everything to get DS to sleep better-- in a crib, a bed alone, etc and what works is him sleeping in bed with us. He still wakes frequently at 16 months, but we are starting to see improvements, and at least I don't have to get up out of bed when he does wake!


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## funkymamajoy (May 25, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *almadianna* 
So no, not all babies wake up to nurse when they are hungry. Mine did not. I had to wake her up to nurse or she would just sleep. While many children wake up when hungry many others do not.

I never said all babies wake up when hungry. I said some babies don't need to eat at night. I also never said that my baby CIO or that I implemented harsh sleep training. I said we stopped co-sleeping and as a result he stopped nursing constantly at night.

If you want the details: we moved his bed, where he always started out the night, into his sibilings' room. Our routine of nursing/rocking to sleep is still the same, he just goes into another room once he's asleep. I never CIO and I never refused to nurse him at night. Since he usually wakes up around 3 am to nurse (about 6 hour stretch), I feel like I can assume that he wakes when hungry (he comes back to our bed at this point). He used to wake as soon as I went to bed, then stayed latched on until morning.

I've tried the Gordon night weaning method with another child and hated rocking and comforting a baby but refusing to nurse her. For us, it works better to start the night separately since it the problem was sleep, not nursing.


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## mrskingred (Aug 3, 2006)

Night weaned at 18 months due to a child in living circumstances. DS coslept with Dad (in his old childhood room) while I slept on sofa. DS is still nursing at almost 3.5 y and starts his day with mummy milk at 6am. (He usually wakes and comes through to us before then, but for the sake of my sleep he doesn't get milk until then).


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## SparklingGemini (Jan 3, 2008)

I didn't nightwean but DD stopped waking up to nurse(for the most part) right around her second birthday.

There are still times when she will wake one or two times a night. But they are few and far between now.

I truly believe it'll happen for ALL kids when they are ready. Of course, some might need some gentle persuasion, and some mamas might NEED them to sleep instead of nurse. Goodness knows I had my moments of irritation and exhaustion!


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## Monkey Keeper (Nov 20, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *tinuviel_k* 
We night-weaned at 15 months [snip]

My daughter was waking up every 2-3 hours to breastfeed even at 14 months. I was literally losing my mind from lack of sleep.

This. In our case, however, nightweaning led to complete weaning within a month or 6 weeks. She was reverse cycling and pretty much only nursing at night, with about 2 nursings during the day. Those were short to begin with, and she just lost interest.


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## InstinctiveMom (Jul 12, 2004)

With my first, I gently night weaned at 14 months old over the course of a month or so because was pregnant with my second.
He nursed again for 2 months without restrictions after my second son was born, and then we night-weaned again (nursing 2 at night was VERY tiresome).
He eventually weaned at 37 months, and I continued to nurse my second until he was almost 3. I didn't purposefully night wean my second, but he cut back on his night nursing when he was a little over 2 or so, I think.

Night weaning hadn't been my "plan", but getting pregnant unexpectedly kinda forced the situation. In the end, it worked out very well for us.


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## chiara (Apr 6, 2005)

she had just turned 4.







she still gets a little nursy in the morning when we are both awake, though.


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## MommaShark (Oct 23, 2007)

self night weaned at 38 mo.


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## lonegirl (Oct 31, 2008)

I didn't night wean until he was weaned. I day weaned first so I could get on with my day...and also to stop listening to people comment that I was still nursing a 2+y/o.
He weaned fully at 2.5 years (child led) (when we moved to a new house)


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## JorgieGirl (May 13, 2006)

Around 11-12mo. Didn't take long. We used the Jay Gordon and DD took to it right away. I don't feel like it did her any injustice as she still nurses during the day and barely made a peep of complaint during the process.


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## anotherpeanut (Oct 22, 2009)

13 months. I couldn't take it anymore, I was exhausted and starting to get resentful and it was impacting his sleep...he was waking just to nurse and didn't need to be. We sent my husband in for less than 5 days and he was fine, very few tears. I have zero regrets about night weaning him then!


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