# birth- more or less painful than expected?



## octobermoon (Nov 22, 2007)

This is in addition to the great thread i just read about *transition and pushing* just to get a better picture of your experiences thanks!


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## ledzepplon (Jun 28, 2004)

I voted "more painful"--what I meant was, birth was more painful the first time than I thought it would be.


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## LianneM (May 26, 2004)

It was intense, and easily the hardest thing I've ever done, but less painful than the media led me to believe.


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## nighten (Oct 18, 2005)

Just the pushing/birthing part? Not bad at all. The slight tearing/ring of fire? Very bad -- but that lasted seconds only.

I didn't vote because it was actually about as painful as I'd expected it to be.


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## barefootpoetry (Jul 19, 2007)

I voted more, but I hesitate to quantify it as "painful." Yes, it hurt. A LOT. But it was not "pain" in the sense of being like a broken leg or a punch in the face. It was more like the most intense sensations ever. Okay, I know this sounds fruity, but bear with me. I was definitely unprepared for how INTENSE it was going to be, and how HARD I would have to work. Does that make sense? And I'm not trying to rephrase it to make it sound all hippy-dippy and cutesy. That's honestly how it felt.

I knew in advance that the best way to deal with it would be to just surrender myself over to it, but I didn't know just how much I would have to do that. Labor is like being strapped to a rocket and getting shot into space at a thousand miles an hour.The weight of the atmosphere is crushing you, nd the wind is blowing so hard against you, but there's nothing you can do about it because you're strapped to that rocket. You just go along for the ride and wait till you land. There's no point in fighting it.

Now when the baby actually came out, I had no pain at all because I was in the pool. I didn't feel comfortable in it during labor, so I probably would have hurt a lot less had I been in the water more. But I had no ring of fire, no nothing. I didn't feel myself tear. I broke my tailbone and didn't even feel THAT until afterwards. Hell, I even stood up in the pool with the baby half hanging out of me because his shoulders got stuck, and I didn't feel that either. I guess it might have been because I was so thrilled to be in that moment that the last thing on my mind was how much it hurt.

Looking back, the feeling of a natural birth was so incredible and amazing, but for a few days afterwards I was just utterly flabbergasted at how overwhelming it had been. I couldn't believe I'd survived something that intense. So yes, for me, it was much more "painful" than I'd anticipated. But it was totally worth it, and I'll gladly do it again next time.


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## MrsAprilMay (Jul 7, 2007)

The first one was very painful, because I was very scared. The second one was virtually painless.


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## Gladiolus (Jun 3, 2008)

I didn't know what to vote.
With my 1st, it was more painful and intense than I had imagined. But with my 2nd, I kept saying "no, it gets worse than this... this isn't anything yet!" but it just wasn't as painful and intense as my 1st.


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## lunamegn (Nov 30, 2004)

I don't know how to vote either because while it was painful near transition, it wasn't all that bad during most of labor. But I don't want to vote "less painful than expected" because it was about as painful has I was expecting. Kinda in the middle of this one.


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## aramat (May 19, 2007)

I voted both! My first birth was LESS painful than I expected (overall). I was not well-prepared and expected to need drugs, and ended up not taking the drugs until I was 9cm -- and had I known better, maybe I would have waited and not taken the drugs.

My second birth, six years later and after reading a ton of natural birth stories, was MORE painful than I expected. By the second birth, I thought I was an expert and well-read and would relax and it wouldn't hurt. But it still hurt, so it was actually "more" painful than I expected.

Birth is simply not predictable! Every woman, every birth, is different!

Editing to add -- Also, before the first birth, I used to have horrible menstrual cramps. Horrible. Sometimes medications just flat-out wouldn't work. At all. I'd be in bed tapping my forehead against the wall for hours, to distract myself from waiting out the pain. Then, after the baby, my cramps were bearable! So perhaps part of the second birth being "more" painful was that I wasn't as accustomed to dealing with pain anymore.


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## Awaken (Oct 10, 2004)

Also voted both. First time- much less painful than I thought. More like abdominal tightening and then intense pressure, and it was over so fast I never really had a chance to worry about it. All in all a very pleasant and do-able experience. 2nd time not very pleasantly surprised that it was quite excruciating, continual knifelike pains in my cervix. Thankfully over very quickly. Both were natural, no-intervention, out of hosp. births.


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## wrzos (Jan 15, 2005)

I voted less, b/c I really feel like it isn't that bad. I've had a temp crown fall off a tooth with a nerve and felt that was MUCH worse than childbirth.

That said - pushing sucks for me. Transition is just shaky and intense, not painful per se. Pushing SUCKS. You know it will hurt worse to push rather than to blow off the force of the contraction, but you know you have to do it to birth the babe. I did coached pushing with my first, and was bound and determined to let it all just flow out with my 2nd. Hell no! After 1 attempt to just ease it out - I had someone count out loud for me and pushed that babe completely down and out on the next contrax.









Much better for me to just push quickly, efficiently, and FAST.


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## Full Heart (Apr 27, 2004)

#1 was what I expected it to be. #2 was worse than I expected it to be (I didn't expect it to get easier I just didn't think it could ever be that bad). So after #2 and knowing how bad it could be I always knew it could be that bad again. Thankfully I have only ever experienced that kind of pain once again but I always expect it to be terrible like those 2 times, just so I am not unprepared for the possibility. So I guess both lol.


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## grniys (Aug 22, 2006)

It was much worse than I expected.


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## Peony (Nov 27, 2003)

About what I expected, just a little more painful with #1 cause pushing sucked.


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## bellee (Feb 26, 2003)

I had two hospital births with an epidural and one natural, at home birth. I expected the home birth (the last one) to be more painful, contraction wise, but it wasn't, I got in the tub and I was fine. I did feel that "ring of fire" for about 10 seconds that I never felt before, so that sorta blew me the eff away. I voted "more painful". But, I don;t mean to scare anyone. It only lasted a few seconds while my daughter's head passed through, from there, she was out and the burn was gone almost before I could recognize what I was feeling


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## leila1213 (Sep 15, 2006)

I don't like the word pain either. I agree with "intense", "uncomfortable/discomfort", "hard/hard work", and even "hurts", but pain just doesn't fit with my experience. I voted less painful than I expected because I didn't feel pain. But I didn't really expect to, either. I was prepared for and believed in the possibility of a pain-free birth.









ETA: Afterpains and sore nipples...that's another story!


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## kalirush (Jun 14, 2005)

Neither... I had a pretty accurate preconception.


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## pumpkinhead (Sep 15, 2003)

The actual birth part was less painful then I'd expected. The labour was more painful than I'd imagined.


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## Emily's Mama (Apr 22, 2007)

voted "more" but didn't know how to vote.

I found early labor more painful than I exepected, mainly since I was trying to use Hypnobabies and was aiming for a painless birth, which it wasn't

BUT I found transition very manageable and was almost in a trance-like state and I could feel the "ring of fire" very mildly and had a 2nd degree tear, but it was painless and quick. I was very surprised by that, as I imagined pushing the baby out would be the worst part, and it definitely was not (it was painful in the hours/days/weeks after though!)


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## lafemmedesfemmes (Nov 16, 2003)

i've given birth three times and each time i've been surprised at how painful it is. one would think that after the first time, i'd be prepared for the experience, but so far i've ended up whiningly indignant at how much pain i'm in.









(eta: for the record, it didn't stop me from birthing unassisted the last two times. the first time was a hospital birth with morphine at 4cm and demerol at 7cm.)

christina


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## stik (Dec 3, 2003)

I didn't vote because both answers are true for me.

With my first dd, real contractions began shortly after SROM and I labored for about 7 hours. It was intense and uncomfortable, but I wouldn't describe it as painful.

With my second dd, my water broke at midnight, contractions were few and far between until 7:30 am, and dd was born at 10 on the dot. It felt a little like being hit by a truck. I had a wonderful and supportive doula, and she helped a ton, but the only thing that kept me from screaming a lot of profanities and demanding drugs was my desire not to hurt her feelings. I'm pretty sure I was going through transition when I felt that way, so I'm glad now that she inhibited that urge (and since she was EXTREMELY helpful with comfort measures, I don't feel like I was unduly constrained.)


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## Murihiku (Oct 2, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *stik* 
I didn't vote because both answers are true for me.









: Less painful the first time, more painful the second.


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## chic2chic (Jan 10, 2007)

i was shocked at how fast & easy labor was, both times. and the pushing, too.


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## SheepNumber97245 (Apr 20, 2007)

I just voted less painful, and it tied the vote! haha.

I wasn't expecting to have pain to begin with because i planned on using a hypnotherapist. My dad was my mother's hypnotherapist when i was born and she didn't have any pain, but i did expect to have to fight it more.

After it was all over i thought, that was it?? It wasn't that hard to keep my mind focused on relaxing. It was also much faster (7 hours of labor) than i expected it to be so i think that had something to do with it. When it came time to push i thought, oh... already? Great! lol


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## LokiPuck (Jan 11, 2003)

I voted less. The mainstream media wants us to believe that death would almost be a preferable option to pain of giving birth.

I agree with PPs who said it was very intense. It hurt, but the second I laid hands on my baby, any pain I had was gone. In fact, I ended up on such an emotional high afterwards, that I had a hard time getting to sleep. Any discomfort afterward was minimal as a result.

I had a much tougher time with the roller coaster of post-partum emotions/baby blues/raging hormones that kicked in several days later.


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## Belle (Feb 6, 2005)

I voted less, but it was about what I expected. It wasn't as bad as the media makes it out to be.


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## luckymamato2 (Jun 3, 2006)

It was about as painful as I expected, but no one can really prepare you for the ring of fire. I was fighting it every step of the way, though. LOL Maybe if they had let me stay in the water I would have coped better, or if it had been a wee bit slower. I went from 5cm to done in 3 hours. I didn't know I would be so swollen! And sore, as if I had run a marathon or had a personal trainer kick my butt. I would totally recommend being in good shape - walking alot, doing cardio, lunges, squats, strength training all over, etc.

I had no pain after she came out. The afterpains/them pressing on my abdomen to slow my bleeding wasn't fun, and neither were the stitches (I felt every one even though she used a local), but nothing compared to the birth. I wasn't tired/sleepy - just sore, and physically drained.


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## Collinsky (Jul 7, 2004)

I chose both! My first birth was less painful than I had expected. (More exhausting, though!) My second birth was more painful than I had expected... I thought it would be like my first, only easier.


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## groovynaturemama (Mar 8, 2007)

i didn't vote, b/c my answer is neither. i didn't have any expectations about labor other than it would be a lot of work, intense and it would be big. i never speculated how big or intense, though. it was big and a lot of work, but i loved pretty much every minute of labor, and i think not placing any expectations on it helped me to accept and release more to it.


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## emaye_to_2 (Jan 16, 2008)

Well, with my first, it was more painful than I could have imagined for quite a long time. However, I never once thought like "give me pain meds" or even "I can't do this anymore".. I went completely silent and pushed through and it was amazing.


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## Ruthla (Jun 2, 2004)

My first birth was more painful and more intense than I'd expected. My 2nd birth was exactly as I'd expected. My 3rd birth was less painful than expected (as I'd expected it to be the same as my first two births but I actually experienced a couple of pain-free contractions.)


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## mamallama (Nov 22, 2001)

I voted less, because my most recent experiences have been less painful.

My first birth (pitocin induction) was far more painful than I'd ever imagined. I loved that epidural!!

My second (homebirth) was painless, until crowning. That really hurt, but it was over in a moment.

My third (uc) was totally pain free.


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## angelpie545 (Feb 23, 2005)

For me, the labor part was about as much pain as I could handle physically. I honestly don't think my body could have taken much more, especially with my first baby. With my second I only had a little bit of very painful contractions in which I simply remained in my birthing pool holding extremely still. With my first, I got laid down in a position which resulted in my baby being stuck, so it was probably more painful than normal due to that. At one point I had a nearly four and a half minute long contraction-but thankfully only one of those. Once I got up and marched around for a bit her head dropped down and I was able to start pushing.

For the actual birth part, it wasn't as bad as I was expecting. The "ring of fire" hurt like nothing else, but pushing through it wasn't nearly as painful as I was expecting. I did tear, but thankfully didn't feel it because of the pressure of the baby's head. It felt more like a bowling ball coming out of my vagina, if that makes any sense. I think because of all the pain I had just gone through it made the birthing seem like the easy part.


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## Belia (Dec 22, 2007)

I voted more painful. I also had pitocin due to PROM, so I'm hoping that's why. After 11 hours of pit and only making it to 4 cm, I gladly accepted the epidural.

What made labor so difficult for me was the uncertainty of it all--- I didn't know whether I'd be in that pain for an hour or a day. That made it so much tougher to cope.


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## Devaskyla (Oct 5, 2003)

I voted more, but ds2 was very badly positioned, stuck for several hours (I was basically in transition for many hours, got a break, then got to hit transition again) & eventually came out not anterior, not posterior, but transverse. So yeah, it was excruciating & I hope every day the labour for this baby isn't nearly as bad.


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## lovbeingamommy (Jun 17, 2007)

DS's birth was virtually painLESS. So mnay people told me how painful it would be and I hate pain so I put off having a baby for 11 YEARS. Guess I learned my lesson NEVER to listen to people again. Each experience is different for different people. I will not tell people, oh birth is painfree, it's easy, rather I will tell them that IME it's not too bad.


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## desertpenguin (Apr 15, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *barefootpoetry* 
I voted more, but I hesitate to quantify it as "painful." Yes, it hurt. A LOT. But it was not "pain" in the sense of being like a broken leg or a punch in the face. It was more like the most intense sensations ever. Okay, I know this sounds fruity, but bear with me. I was definitely unprepared for how INTENSE it was going to be, and how HARD I would have to work. Does that make sense? And I'm not trying to rephrase it to make it sound all hippy-dippy and cutesy. That's honestly how it felt.

I knew in advance that the best way to deal with it would be to just surrender myself over to it, but I didn't know just how much I would have to do that. Labor is like being strapped to a rocket and getting shot into space at a thousand miles an hour.The weight of the atmosphere is crushing you, nd the wind is blowing so hard against you, but there's nothing you can do about it because you're strapped to that rocket. You just go along for the ride and wait till you land. There's no point in fighting it.

Looking back, the feeling of a natural birth was so incredible and amazing, but for a few days afterwards I was just utterly flabbergasted at how overwhelming it had been. I couldn't believe I'd survived something that intense. So yes, for me, it was much more "painful" than I'd anticipated. But it was totally worth it, and I'll gladly do it again next time.

wow, i think that is the best description ever! the first time for me was crazy intense contractions for only an hour. pushing felt good and the ring of fire was not all that bad. second time it was intense for 3.5 hours (which is how long it lasted from beginning to end)...pushing didn't feel good. the ring of fire was scary intense, i thought for sure i must've torn from my clitoris all the way down and every which way possible. but i only had two very small skid marks. i think all that was due to ds2 being born facing my thigh rather than my bum. and i did hurt immediately after the second time. my tail bone hurt something fierce, and it didn't help that i was sitting wet and cold in an empty bathtub. but it was awesome and after all the afterpains subsided i wanted to do it again.


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## UrbanCrunchyMama (Aug 7, 2007)

I voted "less painful". I was waiting for it to get REALLY bad, and it never did. I was ready to push at home, but went to the hospital anyway. Lesson learned...I'm staying at home next time.


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## mikayla's mama (May 22, 2005)

Both.

First labor I was confident. Then I had complications and a very long, very malpositioned baby and pitocin.... much more painful than I imagined.

Second time around, I found it so much less painful than I thought it would be because I was measuring pain level in comparison to my first birth. I then realized how easy labor could be when you don't have the medical establishment messing around with a natural process.


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## AlpineMama (Aug 16, 2007)

Er... different. Not more or less. Different.

Though I wasn't prepared for the pain of my second. First was back labor, baby had a nuchal hand, ceaseless contrax, and water broken from the start. Second STILL hurt more although it was much more straightforward. Transition sucked with DD!


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## JennTheMomma (Jun 19, 2008)

It was less painful than I had thought. The way some people talked about it was it was going to be so extreme etc. It wasn't. I had a egg sized blood clot a few hours after birth and that was extreme pain, 10 times more painful than giving birth.


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## eurobin (Aug 20, 2006)

My unmedicated portion of my labor was more. Much more.

I had planned to labor in the tub. My water broke to start labor, though, so I was not allowed in the tub. I didn't really have a back-up plan. By the time I was 5 cm, my contractions were right on top of each other with no break. I'd expected a few breaths or even minute between them to refocus but no... they came fast and furious. My mom and the nurses were shocked that I wasn't 7 or 8+ and in transition (though I wasn't "failing to progress" or anything either...). Basically, I had what observors describe as a typical "transition" period of labor for 8 hours straight. I was prepared to make it an hour or two, but after two hours of that and still being only 6 cm, I caved and got an epi.

That said, the medicated portion of my labor was much easier than I'd expected. My epi had worn off by the time I started pushing but pushing and crowning was nothing compared to strong contractions.


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## violets8 (Mar 9, 2008)

My birth was more painful than I expected. I had a 3 day induction with back labor and had an epidural for 7 hours to help cope with the pitocin. The epidural wore off and I went from 3.5 centimeters to 10 centimeters in less than an hour. The pitocin was awful. My bones hurt and I shook all over. I had no break between contractions and couldn't move due to all the tubes and wires. I do have to say that I was amazed. My little son was out in 12 pushes and as soon as he was out the pain was gone and I was filled with complete peace. I did not tear and my baby was healthy even though he had IUGR and was SGA. My grandmother was really funny as soon as he came out she said get that boob out and feed him he has been starving for over a month. It was sooo funny. Now my little son is 6 pounds and over a month old. He is nursing like a champ and we can't wait to see his first social smile.


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## Avecilla (Jan 24, 2008)

I voted "less painful" because my first birth was less painful than I expected it to be.


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## AutumnAir (Jun 10, 2008)

I voted more painful because I had really bad back labour. Got stuck at 10 cm with a lip for hours - basically in transition for about 6-7 hours. NO fun! I was rather shocked because I have a very high pain threshold normally. But that's back labour. I'm just hoping that if I ever have another it won't be a posterior babe and so won't be anywhere near as painful.


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## Honey693 (May 5, 2008)

I voted less painful. I was expecting it to be awful, completely awful (I tend to expect the worst though). It was more intense than anything. I was in the tub most of it and I just kind of zoned out (plus I was in denial that I was in labor, even at 7cm dilated). Pushing hurt, but again not nearly as bad as I had imagined. I've had cramps that were worse.


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## CanidFL (Jul 30, 2007)

So much worse than I thought and I thought I was very well prepared. I read 100's of birth stories, tons of books, etc. Took Bradley classes. I guess nothing can really prepare you.

I was also drilling into my brain during pregnancy that labor starts slow with contractions 10 min apart and easy to continue on with your day. Well my labor hit HARD. I started off at contractions lasting a minute every 2 min apart.

Now, I truly believe my next birth will be way less painful because I will know what to expect.

ETA: The ring of fire was not as bad as I thought so that is a plus


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## durafemina (Feb 11, 2004)

Quote:

I knew in advance that the best way to deal with it would be to just surrender myself over to it, but I didn't know just how much I would have to do that. Labor is like being strapped to a rocket and getting shot into space at a thousand miles an hour.The weight of the atmosphere is crushing you, nd the wind is blowing so hard against you, but there's nothing you can do about it because you're strapped to that rocket. You just go along for the ride and wait till you land. There's no point in fighting it.

Awesome description!!

I had been to lots of births, and was, on some levels, expecting it to be as painful as the nice, calm homebirths had 'seemed'. I knew my mother had been in labour 24h with me and that babe was not in the greatest position (despite my efforts!) so I was also kind of expecting it to be long and hard.
In the end it was length and the intensity and the sheer effort I had to put in that surprised me the most - but it was also more painful than I had been able to fathom (though I had expected this - if that makes any sense?
















I also thought pushing would feel good, but instead it felt like throwing up (down) a really painful bowling ball








The ring of fire - barely even noticed - happened so fast


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## Greenmama2AJ (Jan 10, 2008)

Have you ever had a kick ass leg cramp? In pregnancy I had some doozy's.
Leg cramps make you cry out in pain, tears run down your face, you swear, you make grandious statements, you think its never going to end etc etc.
But then you get up and you walk around, you stretch your toes. And the cramp subsides and its all good.

For me, birth was like that. The cramps hurt like a mutha. But I rode the wave and got over the hill. I had NO2 gas at the hospital I chose and actually laughed during contractions. They turned off the gas (doh!) so that I was only breathing air and I still survived







(Note to self: dont laugh infront of labor nurses next time ;P).

I looooved pushing. Very intense. But not wall crawling painful like a contraction. Just like a ginormous bear hug taking away my breath. I was on all fours curled over. DS got a shoulder stuck (I should have stood up, I got the urge but stayed on all fours) and had a 3rd degree tear. I didn't feel anything because it was all numb.

A great book for me was "Natural Childbirth: the Bradley Method" by Sarah McCutcheon. This book really gave a great description of what I could expect during labour, no fairy dust. In the end, I think birth was more painful during contractions but less painful during pushing and crowning than I expected. So I vote a draw, lol


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## Teresa221 (Feb 3, 2004)

I'm in the "both" camp too. I think your level of pain and discomfort depends on so many things.

With my first, I was just nervous and unsure and EXHAUSTED (28 hours of labor and 2 days with no sleep). I had a failed epidural at 9cm. It hurt because I was tense. It probably would have been manageable had I been more prepared (i.e. known about Mothering








)

The second, well he was really big (just shy of 9lbs) and had a REALLY big head







Plus he came out at a funny angle and it took me 2 hours to push him out. That was certainly a push through the pain moment!

The third was almost born in a toilet







I was very prepared and let go of all control of the situation. I was uncomfortable, but I would hesitate to call it "pain"


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## octobermoon (Nov 22, 2007)

it's close...we need more votes!


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## MistyAngel (Jul 1, 2008)

Good thread. For me, it was without a doubt the worst pain I've ever experienced in my life. Each time. So I voted "more painful".


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## Pyrodjm (Jan 9, 2007)

It was definitely painful, but not as horrible as I thought it would be.


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## not now (Mar 12, 2007)

Not as bad as I thought it would be.

I had a really fast first labor (two hours) so when I was in transition I thought I was in early labor. At that point I was thinking "If this is early labor I'm screwed!" After that all I could feel was his head in my pelvis. I had no abdominal or back pain, just pelvic pain.


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## nalo (Oct 25, 2005)

WAAAAY more painful. However, this is because DD was born with BOTH FISTS on the sides of her head/face, the little bugger. Of course, time has faded the memory but the way I described it was something like "it was indescribable. there truly are no words for that amount and type of pain. it was horrific." Again - fists. If her hands had been at her sides it would have been a whole different story and she would have popped out a few hours earlier too.


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## akwifeandmomma (Aug 13, 2005)

Way less with DC#3. Which is why we didn't make it to the birth center.


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## fairejour (Apr 15, 2004)

I voted more painful, but I had an induction and my uterus was overstimulated by Cytotec. I also had an epidural that was suddenly turned off during pushing. It was horrible.


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## Emilie (Dec 23, 2003)

My first birth in a hospital was MUCH more painful than I expected- tho I was STRAPPED TO A BED_ surrounded by crabby nurses- blah blah blah
My daughter- born at home- was WAY less painful than I expected- the whole thing-onset of labor to delivery was less scary and painful than going for 3 cm until an epidural with my son!


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## sunnygir1 (Oct 8, 2007)

I voted less painful. I always thought I'd do fine during birth. I have had my teeth drilled without anesthetic, which verged on a spiritual experience. People always told me it was nothing like that and much worse. Well, at least for my first birth, I was right. It felt intense, yes, but okay and natural. My daughter's birth was pretty easy though, and no back labor. I hope my next one is as good.


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## USAmma (Nov 29, 2001)

I didn't make it to the end without epidurals for either birth. I was open to the idea of getting them before I went into labor and I'm sure that affected my lack of will power. But what I did feel was WAY more painful that I expected. This coming from a former college long distance runner who knows how to mentally deal with pain. Labor pain is so much different from any other pain that I had thought until then was bad. With dd1 I think I hit transition or very close to it very quickly and did not have time to work up to labor. It was short and powerful.

I attended the birth of a friend's dd who is very strongly natural childbirth minded. I remember in the middle of transition she shouted to me something like, "And you envy me for having natural childbirth WHY??"







Of course after the baby was born she kinda forgot all that and enjoyed the baby and was glad she didn't use pain meds.


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## lovebug (Nov 2, 2004)

80 of you give me hope







that i will have less pain then i exspect. becuase man i am exspecting to have a lot of pain


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## leerypolyp (Feb 22, 2005)

Worse. There was a lot going on: posterior baby, very tired after weeks of prodromal labor and a castor oil induction (42 weeks), other issues that caused me to stay at 7 cm for a long long time. And then hospital bed with hep lock and monitor and oxygen mask to restrict movement.

I did it, and I'm glad I did, and it felt great afterward. But I was as well prepared as a person can possibly be, and it surprised me, the pain.

Don't feel like you've done something wrong if it hurts. You don't get a free pass on labor pain if you're just crunchy enough/relaxed enough/whatever enough.


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## callieollie (Jan 2, 2007)

The first one was more painful and more exhausting than I expected, but it was 30 hours of back labor with double peak contractions and virtually no break in between so it couldn't have gotten much worse!

My second was virtually painless. It was only 3 1/2 hours total with 4 minutes of pushing. I did hypnobabies which kept me fully relaxed except for about 3 contractions. I would'nt have believed I could honestly have a "painless" birth if I hadn't experienced it so it was definitely "less painful" than expected.


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## boigrrrlwonder (Jan 18, 2007)

Far less painful than I imagined. I ended up not making it to the hospital in large part because I was only counting every other contraction for a long time - thinking that I couldn't really be far along since it didn't really hurt. Not that I had a pain-free birth - crowning did really hurt; and during transition I said things like, "I don't think I can do this for ten hours," but I was so prepared for something much worse.


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## Mamja (May 23, 2007)

Hmm, tough question. I was induced and it was WAY more painful than I had expected. But it was probably way more intense than if I had labored naturally. If I had more time to rest in between contractions it would have been better.

The actual pushing part was way LESS painful than I had expected. I mean, it was exhausting and intense, but it wasn't really about pain, rather than pushing my body to its limits. But since that part was so short it doesn't really help my answer.


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## applejuice (Oct 8, 2002)

Extremely painful, but do-able.

I had two posterior births, the second one with a deflexed, asynclitic head. At home.

The other two were easy.


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## cellarstella (Jan 2, 2006)

More painful, both times. First time just totally freaked me out and dragged on and on and I was exhausted to delirium before transition (but still made it! yay!). Second time was not as shocking but I was still screaming from the pain at the end (and was pretty miserable throughout), however hard I tried to relax and breathe and move with the contractions. I think she may have been posterior right up until crowning because the pain was most intense in my lower back/butt. Both babes presented perfect textbook style once they were coming out.


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## treemom2 (Oct 1, 2003)

Birth was much more painful than I expected. . .everytime! I did expect discomfort based on all my readings, but I didn't expect horrible pain (my mother used to talk about how birth is only painful because of our expectation of pain and our fear of the unknown--she told me she had no pain with any of her 4 childbirths). With DD I thought the pain was caused by being confined to a hospital bed and her being my first babe. With DS I expected less pain since he was a homebirth, but again I had terrible pain because he was posterior and I thought this might have been cause by his being malpositioned when my mw broke my waters. With Naiya I again expected less pain, but again she was posterior/stuck and it was excrutiating. My midwives now attribute all my pain during childbirth to be because of a misshaped pelvis which causes my babes to turn posterior to find a way out--thank goodness most women are built normally and don't have these worries (this is also the main reason I will never, ever plan to have another babe).


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## octobermoon (Nov 22, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *treemom2* 
Birth was much more painful than I expected. . .everytime! I did expect discomfort based on all my readings, but I didn't expect horrible pain (my mother used to talk about how birth is only painful because of our expectation of pain and our fear of the unknown--she told me she had no pain with any of her 4 childbirths). With DD I thought the pain was caused by being confined to a hospital bed and her being my first babe. With DS I expected less pain since he was a homebirth, but again I had terrible pain because he was posterior and I thought this might have been cause by his being malpositioned when my mw broke my waters. With Naiya I again expected less pain, but again she was posterior/stuck and it was excrutiating. My midwives now attribute all my pain during childbirth to be because of a misshaped pelvis which causes my babes to turn posterior to find a way out--thank goodness most women are built normally and don't have these worries (this is also the main reason I will never, ever plan to have another babe).

wow a misshapen pelvis?







your kids are beautiful. how is it misshapen?


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## treemom2 (Oct 1, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *octobermoon* 
wow a misshapen pelvis?







your kids are beautiful. how is it misshapen?

All my kiddos started out LOA when my births began but for some reason had to turn posterior to get thru my birthing canal (which ended in DD being a c-sec, DS having to be turned, and Naiya finally turning herself but getting majorly stressed and passing loads of mec causing her eventual death). They all got majorly stuck while trying to get out (we are talking 5 or more hours at 9cm dilation). I honestly haven't had any "official diagnosis" or special test to check my pelvis, but I am inclined to believe my midwives since my births are so abnormal. However, and I just thought about this in the last couple weeks, when I was a baby/child I was diagnosed with hip malformation and was required to wear special shoes, do hip exercises, and have treatments by my D.O. doc a lot--I'm thinking now this might have something to do with my difficult births.


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## MomOf3boyz (Oct 21, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *pumpkinhead* 
The actual birth part was less painful then I'd expected. The labour was more painful than I'd imagined.

I agree with this! The actual pushing was much easier. Transition was MUCH harder than I expected.

I distinctly remember being in a NCB class and thinking "That will never be me" when the instructor was informing our support partners that we wouldn't be able to understand more than 3 word sentences.

I was quite wrong. The nurse told me to go onto my hands and kneel. I kept saying "I don't know what that means" DH says "Hands and Knees" I popped right over - that I understood.


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## mamagemini (Mar 4, 2008)

It wasn't painful, per se, but just intense. Unfortunately, I had a pitocin-induced labor and the contractions were intense. I was having "productive" contractions in the beginning and was just crusing, but towards the end, all contractions were painful and it seemed like they would not stop for a long time. I ended up with an epidural







that worked 99% of the time, but that 1% still felt like never-ending contractions that I probably could not handle without meds.


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## *MamaJen* (Apr 24, 2007)

Way less painful than I expected. There's this part on the birth video right after we got out the pool where I look up with this dazed grin and say, "that wasn't nearly as bad as I though it was gonna be."


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## liliaceae (May 31, 2007)

Much, much more painful than I expected, but that was probably because I didn't go in with a way to deal with the pain, and I ended up tensing up every time I had a contraction. In case you didn't know, you shouldn't do that.









This time I plan on doing hypnobabies and hopefully that will make a huge difference.


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## UnassistedMomma (Jan 24, 2006)

My 1st, 2nd and 3rd were far less painful than I expected, so after such a good run, my 4th was WAY more painful than expected! lol - every birth is different.


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