# Ugh - tell me how you got your baby to stop pinching you while nursing?



## akat (Jun 30, 2009)

Ouch, it really hurts and it's also *very* irritating! He pinches anywhere he can reach.

I don't really want to do a nursing necklace because I don't like to wear jewelry, and don't want to have to wear jewelry 24/7, and I don't want my neck yanked on either.


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## Snapdragon (Aug 30, 2007)

Right from the start I give him my hands to play with. when he is really pinching I often put my hands over my breast so that he just pinches my hand. He also likes to stroke, or clutch or grab- and all of this I meet the need my using my hands- and he is totally happy with that. I have never- right from the start- let him tweak the other nipple or anything that makes me feel bad! I just know that he can't help moving his hands around and pinching while he is nursing- so I just give him my hands to do that to!


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## Knitting Mama (Jan 24, 2010)

I give Cecilia her lovey to hold while she nurses if she's unswaddled.


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## lifeguard (May 12, 2008)

I used to just remove his hand. If he was really persistent I would hold his hand still in mine.

I must say though it took a LONG time for him to really get it. He's 23 months now & still has to be reminded occassionally.


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## SilverFish (Jan 14, 2010)

do you get the under the boob sneak attack? i hate that.

anyway, it's a combination of wanting to feel textures (i notice her making the same hand motions when she's sitting on a plushy blanket or being held by someone in an interesting shirt) and a sort of over-stimulation, over-tired release, because it's worse when she is trying to fall asleep (or should be falling asleep).

i try to wear a tank under my shirt, shirt comes up, tank goes down, and she can clutch, pinch etc the fabric, not me. when i sense a certain amount of 'franticness' to the pinching and grabbing, it's a sign she's overstimulated, so i tend to straighten her bottom arm and clamp it under my elbow, hold down her legs with my other arm and hold her top hand with mine. generally the little fingers relax and stop moving and she usually falls asleep or at least calms down.

when i'm in the mood, (and her nails have been recently trimmed!) i don't mind it so much... we even play games, but yeah, i almost always try to redirect to holding the fabric of my shirt, or holding my hand.


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## The4OfUs (May 23, 2005)

I always trapped (gently) the underside arm extended out under my armpit on the side she was nursing, and then would hold the other hand if she tried any shenanigans with it. I would tell her gently, but firmly that it hurt when she did that and I wouldn't allow her to keep doing it. And believe me, she was not a demure, easygoing gal even as an infant so she was often not impressed with my thwarting her....but even though she was an infant, I was just not OK with being tweaked or pinched so I was OK with her being mad about it. She nursed 21 months so apparently I didn't dissuade her or damage the nursing bond in any way.









My son never did any tweaking or pulling that I recall having to address.


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## marinak1977 (Feb 24, 2009)

DS is into tweaking and while I try to wear a momma necklace I also give him my hand to play with. It usually distracts him from the other nipple.


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## toughcookie (Aug 25, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *SilverFish* 
i tend to straighten her bottom arm and clamp it under my elbow, hold down her legs with my other arm and hold her top hand with mine. generally the little fingers relax and stop moving and she usually falls asleep or at least calms down.


Quote:


Originally Posted by *The4OfUs* 
I always trapped (gently) the underside arm extended out under my armpit on the side she was nursing, and then would hold the other hand if she tried any shenanigans with it. I would tell her gently, but firmly that it hurt when she did that and I wouldn't allow her to keep doing it.

these. except i don't talk to my son when he's nursing or he will detach, look at me for a few minutes, then zoom back into boobdom, which gets annoying when one wants to either get the job done quickly or get a baby with a full tummy.

OP, are you holding in a football hold though? if so it's much harder to control that other arm....


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## snoopy5386 (May 6, 2005)

I gave mine a silky blanket when she got grabby.


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## Terrilein (Jan 9, 2007)

My DS is very grabby at the moment and a burp cloth keeps his hands busy.


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## mom2happy (Sep 19, 2009)

Oh my gosh! I was going to post this just to vent!
I know theres nothing I can do.
My DD is 5 months and she pinches and twists and it HURTS!
She has these diggy little strong fingers.
WHEn I try to hold her hand she gets MAD! She likes to grab the breast she is nursing on with one hand and pinch while grabbing the back of my arm with the other hand. No matter how short I clip her nails it still hurts.
To top it off, she does this with a rythmic pinching motion while she sucks!


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## Peace+Hope (Jul 6, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mom2happy* 
Oh my gosh! I was going to post this just to vent!
I know theres nothing I can do.
My DD is 5 months and she pinches and twists and it HURTS!
She has these diggy little strong fingers.
WHEn I try to hold her hand she gets MAD! She likes to grab the breast she is nursing on with one hand and pinch while grabbing the back of my arm with the other hand. No matter how short I clip her nails it still hurts.
To top it off, she does this with a rythmic pinching motion while she sucks!

haha, my LO sounds similar, but it works for me if i actually massage his hand, not just hold it!


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## wombatclay (Sep 4, 2005)

moving to breastfeeding so the "nursing manners" experts can chime in!









~~~~~~~
Personally I try not to let any "twiddling" become a habit... I redirect the other hand, wear tanks or nursing tops that keep the other side covered, "trap" the free hand under my arm or in my own hand, give the kiddo a toy of some sort (SOFT toy... I got a black eye once when dd2 slammed me with a wooden teether while nursing!), etc. Kellymom has a nice article on nursing manners here.


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## sunsetdancer (Jun 25, 2010)

I would hold his hand so that his fingers are wrapped around one of my fingers. As he got older, I would often give him one of those plastic rings/links to hold onto. It was firm enough for him to grip but not large or hard enough to hurt me if he started flailing it around.


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## mom2happy (Sep 19, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Peace+Hope* 
haha, my LO sounds similar, but it works for me if i actually massage his hand, not just hold it!

If I monkey around with her hand she settles down a bit, but I need my other hand so often to help my other 2 kids or do things that I have no choice but to be pinched. It's kind of funny, but man, when she really gets a grip it can be crazy. My other two did some annoying things when nursing, but not this!


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## Parker'smommy (Sep 12, 2002)

When younger babies, I always redirect the hands and/or hold them. With older babies, I will delatch them, say "no" firmly- not loud or yelling, actually very softly...but firmly and turn them away from me on my lap. I would wait a few seconds and then return to nursing. If it happened again...lather, rinse, repeat. It gets the message across that the behavior is undesirable and that nursing will not happen if the behavior continues. It's what I do for biting too.


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## Beppie (Oct 24, 2005)

I cannot tolerate pinching! I always just firmly remove the hand that is hurting me. Right now I have a baby who will be 11 months coming up. She pinches me quite often, I just remove her hand. I certainly don't tolerate it simply because it hurts! With my other girls, they just eventually learned and I don't remember them ever pinching me once they got a little older than one year. It was mainly a baby action when they didn't know any better. With a little re-direction early on, my kids all seemed to get the hint that it hurts and that I don't like it!


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## ElliesMomma (Sep 21, 2006)

for me, this problem happens only when lying down, sidelying nursing. (i.e., every night when i nurse him to sleep).

he does not give up. and i am pretty sure that it must be a primative method for babies to get more milk flow by stimulating the other breast. so i feel ever so slightly guilty that i absolutely cannot stand it. can't take it even long enough to -- like so many others have posted -- simply remove his hand each time he starts in. i can't handle him starting in.

i take the other tact and simply protect my other breast with my own hand. i cover the nipple. if he wants to tweak or stroke the rest of the breast, he can go for it. but it's the hard nipple he wants, and i don't want him to have it, so sorry.

sometimes i can get away with pulling my nightshirt tight over the breast to make the hard nipple flat. or pulling the covers up over my breast. usually though, it's just my hand protecting it.

he's 12 months. i don't foresee "reasoning" with him for some time to come. can't remember when my daughter "got it" to not do this to me.


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## Quinalla (May 23, 2005)

I've always kept one arm pinned and then when needed distract/redirect her other hand to either a soft toy or using my hand and occasionally to my clothes. I would keep that hand pinned too, but she really hates that, so we compromise that she can't pinch/grab/etc. me, but I offer her an alternative. I've just always been firm and no nonsense about it and she knows that is how it is and rarely tries to get at me. Now she also is fond of kicking and flailing with her legs, so the same rule applies, she can kick and flail all she wants, but not on/at me and she has to keep from pulling at her latch, but luckily she is good about that. Sometimes if she seems overtired and trying to keep herself awake with the kicking, I will pin her legs. If she settles down, I keep them pinned to help her relax, if not I'll generally let the top one go


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## blake201 (May 20, 2010)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mom2happy* 
Oh my gosh! I was going to post this just to vent!
I know theres nothing I can do.
My DD is 5 months and she pinches and twists and it HURTS!
She has these diggy little strong fingers.
WHEn I try to hold her hand she gets MAD! She likes to grab the breast she is nursing on with one hand and pinch while grabbing the back of my arm with the other hand. No matter how short I clip her nails it still hurts.
To top it off, she does this with a rythmic pinching motion while she sucks!

My 3 1/2 month old does the exact same thing! She pinches and scratches my arms, boobs, everything, and no amount of nail trimming helps. It looks like I've been attacked by breastfeeding cats! And she sometimes rhythmically punches my breasts while eating, like she's trying to help the milk flow...

Pretty much the only thing I can do when she's feeling really pinchy is either hold both of her hands (she likes to hold my hands) or to nurse her sidelying, which seems to put her in a less pinchy mood.


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## AirMiami (Feb 3, 2009)

My kid just kind of grew out of it. I know, not the answer you're looking for.


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