# Do your kids, 6 yr old range, ask really obvious questions that they know the answer to?



## LeftField (Aug 2, 2002)

My 6.5 year old is driving me a little nuts with this. I'm just trying to get a gauge on whether it's "normal" or not. He's always been somewhat literal. But lately, the questions are killing me. Like today, at a field trip, we signed a card to thank the company for the nice things they did for us. "What nice things?", he asked, baffled. Uh....the field trip. It was nice of them to let us have a field trip here.

Walking through an area, one small group at a time, I said something about waiting for the rest of the crowd. "What crowd?", he asked. Uh, the 50 million people in the rest of our field trip group that are behind us.

Recently, we tried to drop a book off, but the office was closed. About 15 minutes down the road, my 6.5 year old asked, "Why didn't we drop the book off?" At that point, my 4 year old turned to him and said, "Because it's *closed*."

I'm really not having a good day so I'm not feeling incredibly patient today. My 4 year old woke me up at 5 am to use the bathroom and then kicked his legs in bed until I finally gave up on going back to sleep. So I'm really tired and grouchy.

But these obvious questions...sigh. I swear if I said the sky was blue, he'd ask, "What sky?" And he's not being a wise-guy. He's genuinely asking. And if I say, "Why do you think?" or "Well, what nice things did they do for us?", he says, "I don't know." And then a few minutes later, he can be pressed to give the answer. I am so tired of constantly answering really obvious questions that I know he knows the answer to. And I really really need a nap.

Anyway, is this normal??? Do your kids do this? I don't mean little kids, like 2 and 3 year olds. I only want to hear from parents of 6 year olds and older, honestly. I'm trying to get a gauge on what's typical for his age. Thank you.


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## Magella (Apr 5, 2004)

Yep, my 6 year old son does the same. All the time.

Son, looking directly at eggs cooking on the griddle: "what's for breakfast?"

Son, gazing out the window at falling snow: "is it snowing?"

Son asks if he can have a snack, I say "yes," he turns around, walks 3 feet, turns back and asks: "can I have a snack?" (and, uh, he can *always* have a snack. The answer is never "no.")








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I've started asking questions right back at him: what does it look like I'm cooking for breakfast? What did I just say? What do you think? Where did we just go? What did we just do? What nice things do you think I might mean?

I think that at least some of the time, it's due to just not paying attention fully--he's so often lost in his thoughts and imagination.


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## LeftField (Aug 2, 2002)

Ok, you made me laugh out loud and you made me feel so much better too! Thank you!









Yeah, what you said about getting lost in his thoughts...my son is like that. He's introverted and kind of thoughtful and I think maybe he does kind of go off into daydream-land.

Thank you for making me feel better and making me feel like I'm not alone.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *sledg* 
Yep, my 6 year old son does the same. All the time.

Son, looking directly at eggs cooking on the griddle: "what's for breakfast?"

Son, gazing out the window at falling snow: "is it snowing?"

Son asks if he can have a snack, I say "yes," he turns around, walks 3 feet, turns back and asks: "can I have a snack?" (and, uh, he can *always* have a snack. The answer is never "no.")








:
















I've started asking questions right back at him: what does it look like I'm cooking for breakfast? What did I just say? What do you think? Where did we just go? What did we just do? What nice things do you think I might mean?

I think that at least some of the time, it's due to just not paying attention fully--he's so often lost in his thoughts and imagination.


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## theatermom (Jun 5, 2006)

I honestly don't know if it's normal or not, but my 7 year old has done this occasionally since he was 6.5 or so. It's pretty aggravating to me, but I think that it's partly him being lost in thought, and partly just a reorganization of his brain as he grows and matures.


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## LeftField (Aug 2, 2002)

duplicate post, sorry


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## LynnS6 (Mar 30, 2005)

Yes, it's like he's programmed to ask a question before he actually considers its content!

"Mom, can I change into my jeans so I can play school?"
"Yes. You don't have to ask. They're your clothes and your body, you can decide to change when you want."

the next day:
"Mom, can I change into my jeans so I can play school?"

What gets me most though is the random why questions.
"T, your scooter is in the way. Please pick it up so someone doesn't stumble on it when they come down the stairs."
"Why?"









My only ray of hope is that his teachers claim he's on task and listening at school!


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## abi&ben'smom (Oct 28, 2007)

My 8 year old ds does this. Last year I had mentioned this to his 2nd grade teacher, and a couple of weeks later she told me that she had noticed that there was something about him that she couldn't put her finger on; but when I mentioned to her the repeated questions, she finally realized what it may be. Audio processing disorder. (I cannot do it justice trying to explain it, there are many nice websites that explain it really well.) I'm not saying that's what your son has, but I just thought I'd let you know about it. His teacher this year doesn't think he has this, but she said she makes sure that she always answers his questions. I'm just worried that he may have a teacher in the future who isn't as patient with his repeated questions.


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## AnnieA (Nov 26, 2007)

Yes, I think it may be the age. DSS 7 has been doing stuff like this for a while and he also claims to not hear me although his hearing has been tested. It can get rather annoying but it seems to me that it happens more when he feels like he is not getting enough attention so I try to pour it on a bit more and he will stop for a while.


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## Jessy1019 (Aug 6, 2006)

My daughter is five and does this a LOT. She is exceptionally bright but just likes to talk. I think that's a big part of the problem.

I will tell her to think about the answer and see if she knows it before asking again, and she generally does.


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## hipumpkins (Jul 25, 2003)

Quote:

What gets me most though is the random why questions.
"T, your scooter is in the way. Please pick it up so someone doesn't stumble on it when they come down the stairs."
"Why?"
Oh that is my DD...(ok she's 5 so I snuck in your thread)

sometimes she will ask the same question after I've jsut answered it and sometimes I remind her that if she asks a question it is her job to listen for the answer and if she doesn't understand the answer she can say that but not to ask the same question and then tell me she wasn't listenning when I gave the answer. (Please pas me the run on sentence crown..thank you)


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## koru (Sep 7, 2006)

I was JUST thinking about this yesterday! My dd is only 4.5 but asks these kinds of questions all the time. Yesterday I was emailing one of my doula clients & she asked her name. It just so happens that she has the same name as dds grandmother. As soon as I told her my client's name she asks, "What's grandma's name?" She has known her grandmother's name for at least 2 yrs!? I could probably think of 10 more examples but I won't bore you.

Does anyone know why children do this?


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## jdedmom (Jul 11, 2006)

I haven't experienced this but my son (7yo) will ask me a question then tell me I'm wrong when I answer.







I always ask why he asks me if he knows the answer.


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## A&A (Apr 5, 2004)

Sounds normal.


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## guestmama9904 (Jul 6, 2002)

my step son is 5.5 years old and has recently been doing this like every day, multiple times. we'll have just dropped off my son ari at kindergarden, both of us having walked in the school and he'll say "where's Ari?". so I will respond with a question as well "where do you think ari is?" and he'll answer correctly that he thinks he's at school. ummm, ok then why ask? lol. i dont get it. sometimes ill say something, being directly next to him and he'll say "what did you say?". i do wonder if maybe he has a hearing problem or "audio process disorder' whatever that may be, but reading all the other posts here i guess maybe it normal. i hope. but annoying non- the less.


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## RadUnschooler (Jan 23, 2008)

Yup, My son does it alot too! I think they still want validation for their words,thoughts?


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## MommytoTwo (Jun 20, 2004)

I think its normal. Or maybe my son isnt normal. LOL He asks stuff all the time, and if I am distracted I keep answering and get annoyed. I finally clued in to the fact that he was trying to get me irritated and now when he does it I just look at him and he starts laughing.


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## Jess A (May 26, 2006)

Quote:

"Mom, can I change into my jeans so I can play school?"
"Yes. You don't have to ask. They're your clothes and your body, you can decide to change when you want."

the next day:
"Mom, can I change into my jeans so I can play school?"
Oh, my. This is my son.

"Can I have a snack?"
"Sure."
"Can I?"
"Jake, I said yes."
two minutes later . . . "Can I have a snack?"

And every single day after school . . . "Are my clothes dirty?" when he knows to put his uniform in the wash and has done so every day for the past two and a half years.

Sometimes, I think he wants attention. Other times, I really think he's in his own world because he seems to genuinely surprised by our answer. Now that I think about it . . . he's rarely in our world







.

Quote:

I've started asking questions right back at him: what does it look like I'm cooking for breakfast? What did I just say? What do you think? Where did we just go? What did we just do? What nice things do you think I might mean?
I do this too.


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## loudmama (Mar 12, 2005)

My DD will be 7 in March & does this. I told her yesterday when she asked my why my car is an automatic for the billionth time that I wasn't going to explain it AGAIN.

Ugh.

L


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## *clementine* (Oct 15, 2004)

When my kids are asking questions that seem obvious, they are usually wanting more information. It's like their world has more depth than the adult world so sometimes my answers are too surface for what they want out of me. They don't know HOW to ask the question, so it comes out like they are asking something obvious.
For instance, with the "Where is Ari thing", its like they'd have the thought about Ari, realize that Ari is outside their world view, and now they are wondering where he disspeared to. They may know the technical answer is "at school" but they are more wondering what that means. Like they want it discribed to them. An answer more like "Ari is in art class right now sitting at a big table with a whole bunch of children, and they are painting." THAT is what they want to know.
With the scooter thing.
You just pointed out that somone may trip and fall if it isn't moved. That creates a visual qustion for the child as well. What would happen if someone tripped and fell.
So an answer like "Since the scooter is on wheels, if someone were to accidently step on it, it would roll across the room, causing somone to fall on their butt and get really hurt."
The snack thing and clothes thing.......again, not specific enough. The world is large, Asking if they can change their clothes or have food leaves them to find clothing and food ideas on their own, which creates a visual picture and gets them wondering in their own imagination, so the question "Can I have a snack" would really be "could you give me a colorful idea as to what I could eat or wear?"- "We have a bunch of huge red strawberries......"
That is why we're all so worn out by these questions lol.
They are meandering and creative and we're hurried and straightforward.


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## freestyler (Jan 28, 2005)

It's often just attention seeking/thinking out loud/etc. I do NOT believe every question requires an answer. Most do, but not all. When I get the sense my kids are just asking questions to fill the air with noise, I generally will say that I'd like to stop playing Q & A for a while. Or I'll just think my own thoughts and not answer. When the questions are "fake," the kids literally do not even notice if I do not answer. Generally, I start wondering, "Is this a legitimate request for information?" If the answer is NO, then I will try not to fill the air with more excess noise, i.e. excessive unnecessary answers.

But then, I'm a linguist, so I analyze words to death!


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## *clementine* (Oct 15, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *freestyler* 
It's often just attention seeking/thinking out loud/etc. I do NOT believe every question requires an answer. Most do, but not all. When I get the sense my kids are just asking questions to fill the air with noise, I generally will say that I'd like to stop playing Q & A for a while. Or I'll just think my own thoughts and not answer. When the questions are "fake," the kids literally do not even notice if I do not answer. Generally, I start wondering, "Is this a legitimate request for information?" If the answer is NO, then I will try not to fill the air with more excess noise, i.e. excessive unnecessary answers.

But then, I'm a linguist, so I analyze words to death!









I think the main thing to remember is that children have a different conciousness than we do. They are very dreamy. Sometimes no answer is fine.
Other times I just reply with "I wonder, I wonder........" and leave them in their cloud.


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## savannah smiles (May 4, 2004)

My 6 yr old is guilty of both asking obvious questions and asking questions over and over and over again. I think part of it is just not knowing how to carry on a conversation yet. She knows asking questions is part of conversing but can't always think of "new" ones so she falls back on the old standbys.


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## LynnS6 (Mar 30, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jillkuster* 
When my kids are asking questions that seem obvious, they are usually wanting more information. It's like their world has more depth than the adult world so sometimes my answers are too surface for what they want out of me. They don't know HOW to ask the question, so it comes out like they are asking something obvious.

Yes, I think this is very true of our son. He wants a deeper understanding than our answers give him, but he can't formulate his thoughts into a question that makes sense to us.

We've had tons of questions that go something like:

"What's that over there?"
"That's a river."
"Why?"
"Um...."

What I think he wants to know is: What makes it a river (and not, say a lake or a puddle)? Or why is there a river there (and not say in our backyard)? Or even "How did it get to be a river?" But "Why?" is his catch-all question.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *freestyler* 
. When the questions are "fake," the kids literally do not even notice if I do not answer. Generally, I start wondering, "Is this a legitimate request for information?" If the answer is NO, then I will try not to fill the air with more excess noise, i.e. excessive unnecessary answers.

You know, our son has done this about 3 times that I can remember. When I don't answer, he will keep badgering me until he gets one. When he was 3-4 and I responded "why do you think?" or something similar, he'd get furious. Now that he's older and can reason his way through problems a bit better, he will sometimes respond that.

I do sometimes call a halt to Q & A sessions if I'm getting weary. But if it's a legitimate request for info, it's hard for me to do that.


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## Teresa Murray (Jul 30, 2013)

I found a solution to this problem. I just answer with something silly like..."because the moon is blue in China." or "because three legged dogs can't dance" or "red pigs like mud too". We both laugh and she realizes that she knows the answer. Now she asks those questions because she wants to hear my responses. Keeps me on my toes trying to think of different things. MOST IMPORTANT....REMEMBER!!!! You can NEVER get these days back! ENJOY THEM!!!!! They will only be little until they grow up!!!


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## Mylie (Mar 15, 2004)

Oh this is my 5 year old to a tee...I am so glad it is normal..I was pulling my hair out there for a bit...I think I will go with the give a silly answer back...


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