# I've Been Robbed



## HippieWannaBe (Mar 27, 2008)

Hello Mothers! I'm mostly venting, but also hoping to get some input. I have a four and half month old son who is in daycare. He's been there since he was three months old. He is exclusively breastfeed and gets four bottles of my expressed milk while he's there M-F. Today when I picked him up, the young girl (18) who cares for him in the afternoon said to me, "Austin had a popsicle today!" I was in such shock that I didn't even respond. I just looked at him in the exersaucer and asked, "Did you have your first food ever?" I think she realized what I meant.

He has NEVER had solids and I was hoping to wait till he was between 6-9 months old to even attempt to introduce them. I feel like one of the biggest and most exciting moments (my sons first experience with solids) has been robbed from me. I like the ladies that care for him, but of all things a f'n popsicle? I was so upset that I didn't even ask what kind. So he got sugar and dye and crap as his first solid! I called and talked to the supervisor and she said, "I'll tell them on Monday that they need to not do that, and need to be especially careful with first-time mom's." Like it would be okay if this were my 5th kid? NO!

Anyway, I just wanted to see if anyone else has had a similar experience. I just feel sick to my stomach about it.


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## Awaken (Oct 10, 2004)

I'd be really upset, too







Hopefully this will be a point of education for them. And the "first time mom" comment







: they should be careful with ALL babies esp. when it comes to something like this!


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## robertandenith (Apr 1, 2008)

wow, first time moms? WTF? I don't want ANYONE to give my first, second now my third child a freaking popsicle, specially as a first food. What did you say after she said that? That was SO inappropriate!!!

anyways,


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## April422 (Nov 28, 2007)

I hope you ask for a refund of your money and find a new daycare.

I'd be beyond livid if a caregiver introduced ANY food to my child that I did not provide.

How can they be sure that you don't have a family history of allergy to something in the popscicle?


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## Stephenie (Oct 11, 2007)

I would be pissed if the daycare had given any food at all to a child that young, let alone a popsicle! And even an older child shouldn't be given crap food without running it by the parents. I would look for a new daycare too.


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## New_Natural_Mom (Dec 21, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *April422* 
I hope you ask for a refund of your money and find a new daycare.

I'd be beyond livid if a caregiver introduced ANY food to my child that I did not provide.

How can they be sure that you don't have a family history of allergy to something in the popscicle?











I would be out of my mind mad!!!







I would report them to the state regulating agency. No one in the world should give a child something to eat without EXPRESS parental persmission. With allergies, sensitivities, and personal/philosophical/religious beliefs as well as health problems (diabetes anyone?) they would have been completely responsible if something happened to your son. I would most definitely demand my money back and make a HUGE stink. There is no way this is ok. Ever.










I am so sorry this happened mama. I would be mad/crushed as well. I would make sure you remind the director about aforementioned reasons why it is NEVER ok to do things like this. And as far as the first time mom comment...


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## AlmostAPpropriate (Oct 23, 2004)

kill me but, it wouldnt be a deal breaker for me. Now, if a pattern develops that's something else.


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## littlemizflava (Oct 8, 2006)

got a plain shirt? permement marker? write on it "breastmilk only...NO FOOD"
things should be fine. by the time he has real interest in food he will be grabing for it hope he will not remember it. wonder how many moms have had things put in their children without their knowledge. who still ended up giving them their first foods with out batting a eye. i dont think that counts pretend it didnt happen


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## amandaleigh37 (Jul 13, 2006)

wow..... i'd be furious!

surely the caregivers should have some basic knowledge about what 4 month old babies eat?!


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## ollineeba (Apr 12, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *amandaleigh37* 
wow..... i'd be furious!

surely the caregivers should have some basic knowledge about what 4 month old babies eat?!

Yeah.. that's scary that they wouldn't know that!


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## rmzbm (Jul 8, 2005)

And wow was that superviser condesending!







:


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## spedteacher30 (Nov 20, 2005)

we had something similar happen to us, though it was with a cupcake, not a popsicle, and M was more like 7 months old. And, he had food allergies. And had not yet trialled wheat. and had never had sugar. they told us he didn't eat it, but we were still PISSED.

We kept him there for a couple more weeks, and then pulled him to send him to a place that respected parents' rights to make decisions for their children, and understood the seriousness of food allergies.

I am so sorry that happened to you.


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## westcoastma (Jan 10, 2008)

Ya, that really sucks. I'd be livid.


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## Cassiopeia (Sep 27, 2006)

That first time moms comment is terrible, very condescending. I'd be ticked too.


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## bellymama (Apr 15, 2007)

i would be really annoyed, but it's really not the worst thing that could happen. your son will be fine. he's not tainted or anything. just be really clear that that is unacceptable for the future without your permission.


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## Viola (Feb 1, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *HippieWannaBe* 
I called and talked to the supervisor and she said, "I'll tell them on Monday that they need to not do that, and need to be especially careful with first-time mom's." Like it would be okay if this were my 5th kid? NO!

That's really dismissive, passive-aggressive and unacceptable. They aren't acknowledging the true problem, and were making it your problem. What were they thinking to feed a popsicle to a 4 month old infant, for heaven's sake?


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## April422 (Nov 28, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *bellymama* 
i would be really annoyed, but it's really not the worst thing that could happen. your son will be fine. he's not tainted or anything. just be really clear that that is unacceptable for the future without your permission.

While tainted may not be a word I'd use, if it were my kid I'd be outraged that they changed the flora of my child's gut without my permission.

Breastmilk only, means breastmilk only.


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## paquerette (Oct 16, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *April422* 
While tainted may not be a word I'd use, if it were my kid I'd be outraged that they changed the flora of my child's gut without my permission.









:

Some babies guts close at 4 months, so perhaps it isn't all that bad. But how do we know? Some babies guts close at 7 months. That's the whole point behind delayed solids, we just don't know.


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## Jacksmum8 (Mar 7, 2006)

Oh hugs mama! That sucks, I'd be freak'n LIVID. What a thing to introduce. A popsicle of all things.

On a side note, popsicles are really just sugar water, albeit they have a tonne of crap in them. You babes first solid, (most likely fruit or veggies) is still to come so you haven't missed out. You still have another first to look forward to.


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## becoming (Apr 11, 2003)

I would be absolutely livid and would make sure to send written notice to be posted on the wall that your child is not to have any solids until further notice.


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## natural_momma (Apr 13, 2006)

wow, that was completely out of line and ignorant. Who gives popsicles to a 4.5mo????? And the supervisor's response was completely condescending and unacceptable. From someone who was a childcare administrator, and also pulled my own child from a center when she was ostracized b/c she was not allowed to have Hawaiian (sp???







) Punch and Sprite at 14months, I would be looking for major policy changes in writing, or for other care arrangements. I would be livid. But I know how hard it is to find good childcare, so if you decide to stay, maybe the silver lining is that you can use this opportunity to educate the staff about nutrition so that they do a better job w/your LO and the others in care. Just sorry yours had to be the guinea pig. Good luck mama!


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## NiteNicole (May 19, 2003)

I totally understand and I would be SO disappointed!

Quote:

"I'll tell them on Monday that they need to not do that, and need to be especially careful with first-time mom's."
Is it at all possible that she misspoke and was trying to say something about things that would BE a first and saving them FOR mom?


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## dachshundqueen (Dec 17, 2004)

Oh I would be so angry and I totally feel for you.

I just found out, and my kid is 3, that my mother was letting my (dairy, gluten, soy, egg, and corn intolerant) kid lick oreos when she was 8 months old.

WTH?

I am so sorry that this happened. The supervisor saying to be more careful with the first time moms???? What?









Liz


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## ThreeBeans (Dec 2, 2006)

I hope you report them to the state. That's disgusting.


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## princessgrace (Jan 8, 2008)

I'd pull your baby out of that daycare. Not because its the end of the world that he had a taste of food, but because they hire people so terribly dumb and/or inexperienced that they think its okay to give a popsicle to a freaking four month old.

This is the whole reason I just don't like daycare centers. I don't feel like most of the people working there are qualified at all. I feel much more comfortable with our home daycare provider who really knows her stuff, and because its her livelihood takes all this very seriously. She won't give my dd anything not on the approved list without calling me.


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## tallulahma (Jun 16, 2006)

i would soooo not be okay with this!

and the first time mom comment???

im even more psychotic this second time!


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## HippieWannaBe (Mar 27, 2008)

I have started typing up a letter with all our requirements for our boy. I'm going to take it in on Monday. I also want to talk to the head woman in charge and tell her about the "first-time mom" comment and how that affected me. It was not a good thing to say to me. One of the main reasons we chose this facility is because they advertise how educated their staff is. And they have video cameras in his room, so I can log on and watch him during the day, which has been a double edged sword.

I didn't say anything to the young girl, because she said it was the older, grandma lady who gave it to him. I really like this woman. But was shocked that she did this. Maybe because he has two teeth already she assumed we were feeding him. I have to make it perfectly clear that we have not fed him food, and we will not be feeding him "junk" food. The rest of the kids in his room were given cupcakes. I logged on when I got home, after seeing his orange stained onesie. I watched her sit him on her lap and let him eat the popsicle for 7-minutes and completely cried my eyes out. He seems to be doing fine, although it is 3:30 a.m. and he is wide awake, which is unusual for him. Thank God it's Saturday.

My mom and sister both told me it wasn't a big deal and not to over react. I have two friends who have started their 4-month olds on cereal, and that's their choice, but it's just not something I want to do right now. I also hope that his gut has closed up and that he doesn't have any problems. We have allergy issues on both sides of his family. I am really paranoid about him being in daycare, I HATE it, but right now it's just something that we have to do.

Thank you ladies for all the support and advice.


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## wednesday (Apr 26, 2004)

I would be livid too. A similar thing happened to us, although DS was older. He was about 11 months and had just started daycare. We were sending all his (homemade) baby food and had been very clear that he should only be given food we sent. He was very very slow to take to solids of any kind and even at that point he'd only had a few fruits and veggies. Then I learned they were giving him "snacks" like cookies/pudding etc and I was just crushed. I was never that obsessed with seeing "firsts" and totally don't get that as a compelling reason to SAH but DH and I both had really been looking forward to giving him his first treat. I mean even long discussions about what it would be -- a carrot cake cupcake with cream cheese icing on his first birthday. I was very very sad about it.


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## YesandNo (Mar 16, 2008)

I'm so sorry that you cried while watching the video. Honestly, I wouldn't be too upset about the popsicle. It's not a "solid", it's just sugar water really. You're right to be mad about it, of course, but in the long run I'm sure it's harmless.

The first-time mom comment though ........ damn. Is she saying be more gentle with first time mom's kids? Or is she saying be careful what you SAY to first time mom's kids? Either way, that is so utterly unacceptable. I am angry on your behalf. In talking to the daycare I would definitely ask for clarification on what the HELL that was supposed to mean.


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## ThreeBeans (Dec 2, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *YesandNo* 









I'm so sorry that you cried while watching the video. Honestly, I wouldn't be too upset about the popsicle. It's not a "solid", it's just sugar water really. You're right to be mad about it, of course, but in the long run I'm sure it's harmless.


It's not just sugar water. It's high fructose corn syrup, red dye forty, yellow dye 5, and a variety of toxic preservatives. Please don't minimize what they did to this baby. It was very disgusting and unhealthy.


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## Breeder (May 28, 2006)

I'm pretty taken back that people who are in the business of taking care of children would think that 4 mo.s old was the right time to give a popsicle. The AAP says nothing but BM or formula until 6 mo. - it's just common knowledge!


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## Awaken (Oct 10, 2004)

When you write up your letter to them, I would definitely include some info on how medical science backs up what you're saying- refer to and/or include the AAP statement or other guidelines about starting solids, so they don't just think it's a paranoid first-time mom's list of do's and don't's (not that I think it is, at all, of course- just don't know what their reaction to it will be!)


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## Equuskia (Dec 16, 2006)

I fear to think what else they are doing if they think it is ok to give a popsicle to a *4 month old*.







:


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## krystyn33 (May 30, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Breeder* 
The AAP says nothing but BM or formula until 6 mo. - it's just common knowledge!

I wish this was common knowledge, but I think among many, starting rice cereal at 4 mos is still the norm & my sister's ped advised introducing cereal in the bottle at maybe 2 mos?







I'm sure there are plenty of doctors out there who don't get it, as well as day care workers.

To the OP, hope you get a favorable response to your letter! Sorry that happened.


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## hipmummy (May 25, 2007)

Get a new daycare. That is totally unacceptable. If you cannot switch tell them they under no circumstances are allowed to put anything but breastmilk into your dc's mouth until they are one yera old. If you have to print ou stickers on the computer and stick one on each day. When you do start with solids only give them at home or send them with clear instructions. I would also go as far as having your healthcare provider call them. I cannot believe what fools they were. I would have lost my mind.


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## flapjack (Mar 15, 2005)

Well, no, you haven't been robbed. Giving your child a first taste of solids isn't a right and really, it's not a big deal. BUT I am outraged at their response.
As a PP mentioned, I'd take it to whoever licences daycares in your area, and to the CEO if it's part of a chain. The supervisors attitude is as unacceptable as the person who did it, to me at least. I would also do whatever it takes to get compassionate leave from work and go and find a new daycare.
You do realise that some of the chemicals a PP mentioned as ingredients aren't even legal over here, they're considered so dangerous? That's a whole other issue, but I'm pretty shocked.


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## Synchro246 (Aug 8, 2005)

I'd be totally mad too. And I would have felt talked down to with the "first time moms" comment. Even though I agree with the quote below. She probably did mean that they need to be careful not to do firsts that should be reserved for the family if at all possible. No matter what it's NOT ok to give a 4 month old a popsicle as a first food.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *NiteNicole* 
Is it at all possible that she misspoke and was trying to say something about things that would BE a first and saving them FOR mom?


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## LeighB (Jan 17, 2008)

Go to a new daycare for sure. If they don't know enough not to give a 4 months old a Popsicle, they can't be too bright.

Sorry!


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## IlluminatedAttic (Aug 25, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *HippieWannaBe* 
The rest of the kids in his room were given cupcakes.

I'm assuming that this daycare follows the common trend of splitting kids into classrooms by age, which means the "rest of the kids" in question are all under 18 months, or possibly under a year? If so then it seems their education level of what babies and toddlers should be eating for snacks does not improve with the age of the child. I'm sure I have a jaded view of things after working in the early childhood ed. field for so long, but I highly doubt you will do much more than make the workers gossip about you and pity your 'poor deprived' child (although they will follow your rules for fear of a lawsuit). As he gets older they may single your child out in class and at worse say things like, "I know you want a cupcake, Johnny, but your Mommy told teacher not to give you any. You tell her tonight at home that everyone else got to have a cupcake but you only got a yucky carrot."

I would pull him and look for a place that more closely follows your philosophy. There are more and more places now that have fruit and veggie only policies for snacks (although many seem to think the Costco size bottles of ranch dressing are an acceptable accompaniment) and no sugar policies for all foods, even holiday and birthday celebrations. Meanwhile, I would check with your state and county licensing boards to find out if they have any regulations in place concerning foods in daycares. Some places have stricter rules about what facilities are allowed to serve the children.


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## barefootpoetry (Jul 19, 2007)

WHAT?!?! What kind of daycare feeds 4 month old babies POPSICLES?!? I didn't read most of this thread but I hope you're seriously considering switching daycares. The "first time mom" comment was way out of line too. First time moms aren't the only ones who don't want their 4 month old babies sucking on a stick of dyed frozen sugar! What if he'd had a bad reaction to the dyes (not to mention other chemicals) in it? Makes me wonder what else they consider "okay" at this place.







:


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## RoadWorkAhead (Sep 8, 2005)

I work in the church nursery, and we can't feed a child snack under 12 months, and the first question for over 1 years is about snack and food allergies. Course my own is severely food allergic so that mgiht influence us but still.....We can only feed under 12 months what we are provided to feed them, if we are asked to. Thats it. I can't imagine taking it on my self to feed a popsicle. I honestly don't think I could continue to use the care provider myself, but we have a serious issue with foods.


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## trancechylde (Apr 14, 2008)

Quote:

I also hope that his gut has closed up and that he doesn't have any problems.

Quote:

Some babies guts close at 4 months, so perhaps it isn't all that bad. But how do we know? Some babies guts close at 7 months. That's the whole point behind delayed solids, we just don't know.










Uuuum, am I really badly informed or something? Because I have never heard of babies guts' "closing"..
What exactly are you referring to here?


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## SophieAnn (Jun 26, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *trancechylde* 









Uuuum, am I really badly informed or something? Because I have never heard of babies guts' "closing"..
What exactly are you referring to here?

(My own lay-man's explaination) Basically, when a baby's gut is immature, the cells are more open - to absorb as much as possible from breastmilk. But, this means that whole proteins are absorbed through the gut so until the cells become more closed, (i.e. until the gut matures) it is really only ready to handle breastmilk.

Science/the medical community seems to have concluded that babies guts mature around 6 months (on average?), so that is why the recommendation by the WHO, AAP, CPS (Canadian Pediatric Society, not Child Protective Services - ha!) is breastmilk or formula ONLY for at least 6 months. Many people, especially here on MDC choose to wait longer to introduce solids to make sure that the gut is mature first.

Here's a kellymom article explaining it (much better than I did):
http://www.kellymom.com/nutrition/so...ay-solids.html

"From birth until somewhere between four and six months of age, babies possess whatis often referred to as an "open gut." This means that the spaces between the cells of the small intestines will readily allow intact macromolecules, including whole proteins and pathogens, to pass directly into the bloodstream.This is great for your breastfed baby as it allows beneficial antibodies in breastmilk to pass more directly into baby's bloodstream, but it also means that large proteins from other foods (which may predispose baby to allergies) and disease-causing pathogens can pass right through, too."

---> Now, to the OP I agree with the PP's who said they would pull their child out of that daycare. The care providers seem to know nothing about when it is appropriate to feed a baby anything other than breastmilk or formula and that's scary. Plus, the idea that they think a cupcake or popsicle is appropriate for a baby, and the fact that it was fed without permission.... yeah. Hugely inappropriate and worth switching daycares over - especially since the supervisor you spoke with didn't seem to take it very seriously.


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## veryerin (Jul 29, 2007)

Wow, I would be so angry. I would bring them some lit from the AAP about not starting ANY solids till after six months, and I would also bring them some info about food dyes and hfcs. Frick that ticks me off.


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## go0ber (May 26, 2008)

new day care. stat. also i would chew out this young woman in person until she was in tears.

not okay.

eta: i doubt the popsicle was even sugar. sugar has a bad rap and isn't as evil as everyone says it is. but i bet the popsicle was that HFCS crap that they stick in everything now. you actually can't really find much "food" with real sugar in it nowadays.


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## mytwogirls (Jan 3, 2008)

!!!!! I would be highly pissed off! Although my kids don't go to daycare occasionally they go to my MIL house. I love her to death but she is always on me about not giving them fast food (my two have never had fast food in their life...EVER!) and one day when I came to pick up my oldest (she just turned two) she had a HUGE Snickers in her hand. I almost passed out. So yeah you did the right thing. I would write the daycare a letter with a list of stuff NOT to give him and then have them SIGN IT! Photocopy it and keep a copy for yourself. Seriously I would. That is wrong and the comment about the first time mom thing is really wrong and rude. I am sorry you had to go through that.


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## lunamegn (Nov 30, 2004)

I would have been livid as well.


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## Artichokie (Jun 19, 2007)

I am not particularly sue-happy, but I would press charges.


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## Cekimon (Feb 3, 2008)

wow i had a similar experience but it happened right in front of me. someone gave my son some melted ice cream via their finger! and this was a relative who i regard as a "good parent." it wasn't as bad as a whole popsicle or bowl of ice cream ... it was just the melted creamy stuff but i was still livid. i think my son was between 3-4 months old and had no solids at that point.

i hate it the way people try to downplay stuff like this - as if you are extra sensitive b/c you're a first time mom. that's just wrong.


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## GooeyRN (Apr 24, 2006)

Why on earth would they give a baby a popcicle anyway? I understand why they give rice cereal and other stuff, but an ice pop?

My ds's first food was also a popcicle, at 5 months old.







Never leave a toddler and baby alone even for a second if the toddler has food. I only knew he had some by seeing the blue ring around his mouth. I seemed to forget that today. DD gave ds a blueberry while I was peeing today. sigh.

At least I can say my 2 year old truly doesn't know better and thinks its nice to share. So I cant be mad at anyone but myself. Your day care provider isnt 2 and should know better.


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## NYCVeg (Jan 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *YesandNo* 









I'm so sorry that you cried while watching the video. Honestly, I wouldn't be too upset about the popsicle. It's not a "solid", it's just sugar water really. You're right to be mad about it, of course, but in the long run I'm sure it's harmless.

It's not necessarily harmless. I have child with very extensive food allergies. We did not know about her allergies until she was a year old, but, because allergies run in our family, we did everything possibly to prevent them--including delaying solids until she showed all signs of developmental readiness (which, for her, was at around 6.5 months). If my child had had a popsicle at 4 months, her allergies might be significantly worse, because she likely still had an open gut at that point. A cupcake at that age, if she had eaten it, could have killed her.

More than that, like other posters, I would be EXTREMELY worried about what else they were doing if they thought popsicles were an okay snack for a 4 month old. I have some friends/family members who parent in the most mainstream way humanly possible--and the food that I've heard people giving before 6 months are rice cereal, bananas, avocado, and sweet potato--given one at a time.

And I would definitely make some hay about the first-time mom comment which is incredibly offensive and demonstrates that they don't get it AT ALL.


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## milkybean (Mar 19, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *go0ber* 

eta: i doubt the popsicle was even sugar. sugar has a bad rap and isn't as evil as everyone says it is. but i bet the popsicle was that HFCS crap that they stick in everything now. you actually can't really find much "food" with real sugar in it nowadays.


Quote:


Originally Posted by *ThreeBeans* 
It's not just sugar water. It's high fructose corn syrup, red dye forty, yellow dye 5, and a variety of toxic preservatives. Please don't minimize what they did to this baby. It was very disgusting and unhealthy.


Exactly. My son has drastic reactions to anything involving corn syrup, and since many/most foods that have that also have food dyes, it might be a food dye issue as well. We delayed solids until he was almost a year, and we didn't feel him junk for at least a year after that, so it was only after he turned 3 when we figured it out.

I can't imagine what I would have done if someone fed him those chemical ingredients at 4 months!

Quote:


Originally Posted by *YesandNo* 
It's not a "solid", it's just sugar water really.

And that right there is why the OP is going to have to be incredibly specific in her instructions if she keeps her baby there.

"oh it's not a solid, it's just ice, I didn't think it counted!"


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## bellacymom (Apr 3, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Cassiopeia* 
That first time moms comment is terrible, very condescending. I'd be ticked too.

OMG I agree! Not only did they do something that bothered you (for good reason) but they insulted you on top of it! If it were me I would find a new daycare. When you told them they shouldn't have said anything but "OK I am so sorry and I will handle the situation". Nothing else. How infuriating!


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## MoonStarFalling (Nov 4, 2004)

A popscicle of all things. Geez. And the comment about first time moms was the kicker. If they hire people that ignorant I don't think I'd trust them with my child.


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## TefferTWH (May 13, 2008)

That's just ignorant. And food allergies aren't the only thing to worry about, My son has reflux and food with heavy dyes and lots of sugar come right back up with a nice helping of acid to torment him.


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## MacKinnon (Jun 15, 2004)

At least here in Michigan that is against licensing. Infants under a year can only eat food or bottles prepared for them at home. They can't even mix dry formula. Everything has to come from home in labeled containers, with their name and the date. They don't share anything, even cherrios from one child to another. And they don't, CAN'T, provide anything to them. I would be ticked, especially at the directors comment. My DS is my second, and I can promise you I was just as interested in delaying solids and seeing him eat his first foods as I was with DD!


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## ellymay (Aug 4, 2005)

That would PISS me off, I have 5 kids and that would p me off w/ my youngest! I don't want ANYONE giving him ANYTHING period. (((((((BIG HUGS))))))))))


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## mamatoElias (Aug 2, 2006)

So sorry that happened. It does sound like it was an honest mistake and not something they were trying to hide from you. Hopefully, you can talk to them so this doesn't happen again.


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## trancechylde (Apr 14, 2008)

Quote:

(My own lay-man's explaination) Basically, when a baby's gut is immature, the cells are more open - to absorb as much as possible from breastmilk. But, this means that whole proteins are absorbed through the gut so until the cells become more closed, (i.e. until the gut matures) it is really only ready to handle breastmilk.

Science/the medical community seems to have concluded that babies guts mature around 6 months (on average?), so that is why the recommendation by the WHO, AAP, CPS (Canadian Pediatric Society, not Child Protective Services - ha!) is breastmilk or formula ONLY for at least 6 months. Many people, especially here on MDC choose to wait longer to introduce solids to make sure that the gut is mature first.

Here's a kellymom article explaining it (much better than I did):
http://www.kellymom.com/nutrition/so...ay-solids.html

"From birth until somewhere between four and six months of age, babies possess whatis often referred to as an "open gut." This means that the spaces between the cells of the small intestines will readily allow intact macromolecules, including whole proteins and pathogens, to pass directly into the bloodstream.This is great for your breastfed baby as it allows beneficial antibodies in breastmilk to pass more directly into baby's bloodstream, but it also means that large proteins from other foods (which may predispose baby to allergies) and disease-causing pathogens can pass right through, too."
okay, well I guess I *am* pretty badly informed then; I have never heard this theory before







It makes sense actually.

Thanks for your response and for the "enlightenment"


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## Kat_shoshin (Feb 16, 2007)

It's amazing how uninformed everyone is though...

Every bit of literature put out by the province I live in says "NO FOOD until 6 months." and every parent I talk to says that they were advised by their doctor to feed their 4 or 5 months old child. Mine was 3 months and we were advised to start him on cereal because of his 8 month old weight and size. Even at 6 months we were advised to feed him rediculous allergens like fish.

And an aquantance of ours still does the gatorade in the baby bottle when it's hot and has been known to let her 8 month old FTT drink pop.

And the healthy food thing? I provide home daycare through an organization that requires me to provide healthy snacks and lunches, but this same organization, at playgroups gives out snacks like, well yesterday it was a grab bag of random sugared cereal, chocolate chips and marshmallows.

Lovely... I fed my 14 m/o the pretzels out of it and the kids I babysit sugared up and didn't eat their lunches. It was awesome









My mother tried to give my child orange creamsicle at 4 months, but we norrowly averted it.

My entire family almost held an impromptu intervention when I wouldn't let my 5 year old eat birthday cake at my mother's party.

My SIL reached across the table at thanksgiving, while I was saying NO, NO, NO!!! and gave my barely 6 m/o cool whip! That was so nasty on the other end - it wasn't even FOOD. I was mad, but again, it was done.

And finally, after requesting that they not give my son anything but water to drink, no applejuice, which they did anyway, my FIL gave DS a revello chocolate icecream bar at 10 months. "He wanted it and I couldn't get it from him" was the excuse for his chocolate covered clothes.

It happens to a lot of us, don't feel robbed, just consider this the first day of your ever vigilant advocay for your child. Just say never again. I have often said that the way I was treated by NICU staff was deplorable, but it helped me to stand up to any ill treatment of myself or my child since then. Stand up for what you believe in and find someone to care for your child that respects parents wishes.


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## Heavenly (Nov 21, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MoreThanApplesauce* 
I am not particularly sue-happy, but I would press charges.

Good luck on that one! I guarantee you will be laughed out of the precinct.

To the OP - I would also be really pissed and would probably find a new caregiver. This person honestly thought it was okay and didn't realize how upset you'd be so I wouldn't rip them a new one.


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## Heavenly (Nov 21, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kat_shoshin* 

My entire family almost held an impromptu intervention when I wouldn't let my 5 year old eat birthday cake at my mother's party.


You wouldn't let a FIVE year old eat birthday cake. Um..yeah, if I was your family I would think you were off too. Everything in moderation. Denying your child any treats at all, even at special occasions will end up backfiring on you IMO.


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## Datura (Mar 18, 2005)

Well, since it was the older lady that did it I would imagine that she is uninformed. Honestly it's only been fairly recently that we've all become so aware of allergies, open guts, etc. In her mind she was indulging the little person and keeping them from being left out of the fun. Or so I would think. I can remember when I first started babysitting in the church nursery (waaay back in the day) and being told off by the old girl that ran it for laying an 9 week old to sleep on his back. The wisdom of the time was that laying on the tummy kept them from choking on spit up.

It is unfortunate that they aren't familiar with the AAP guidelines and that you were brushed off. However, if they are an otherwise good facility I would stick with them, after having made my wishes explicitly known. I think that this was an act of well meaning ignorance more than something malicious. And honestly, at this point you can't change what happened and you can't prove that there was any harm done (addressing the comment about suing them). Might want to have a frank discussion about nutrition, though. Feeding babies that junk is disgusting. The worst we ever gave babies that age was Cheerios.


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## IlluminatedAttic (Aug 25, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Heavenly* 
You wouldn't let a FIVE year old eat birthday cake. Um..yeah, if I was your family I would think you were off too. Everything in moderation. Denying your child any treats at all, even at special occasions will end up backfiring on you IMO.

I'm guessing from her signature that this was a mistake and she meant to write five MONTH old.

However, as the mama of a child with an allergy to wheat that sets him up for major insomnia, behavioral issues and eczema I have to say that the 'everything in moderation' philosophy just doesn't always apply. I do my best to bring his own wheat-free cakes, pizzas and other treats to occasions where I know these types of foods will be offered, but I can't honestly say that if we weren't prepared for some reason that I wouldn't forbid him from eating them. After you've seen a child literally writhing on the bed for hours, crying from frustration, banging his head against the wall, etc. due to the reaction to a food then you decided that denying the treats until they are old enough to make the conscious decision for themselves is absolutely worth the bad rap you get as a parent from those who think you are just being overprotective.


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## Artichokie (Jun 19, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Heavenly* 
Good luck on that one! I guarantee you will be laughed out of the precinct.

To the OP - I would also be really pissed and would probably find a new caregiver. This person honestly thought it was okay and didn't realize how upset you'd be so I wouldn't rip them a new one.

Out of the precinct? Hummm... My understanding is that it is illegal to give food to a child that young without expressed consent. Maybe that varies from region to region?

I think a nice letter from a lawyer would emphasize the importance of the issue, and get their attention. I'm not stupid-she'd never actually win a settlement. I DO think it is that serious, though.

As for the original "I've been robbed of my child's first tasting experience..." I've been thinking about this more. What if your child had had a fever and you opted to give her children's tylenol? They are all flavored, much like popsicles, but you wouldn't consider it her first food, would you? That how I would view this; she got a cold liquid flavor kind of like the flavor of kids' meds. It isn't food.

Regardless, ((hugs)).


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## Heavenly (Nov 21, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ZFooFoo* 
I'm guessing from her signature that this was a mistake and she meant to write five MONTH old.

However, as the mama of a child with an allergy to wheat that sets him up for major insomnia, behavioral issues and eczema I have to say that the 'everything in moderation' philosophy just doesn't always apply. I do my best to bring his own wheat-free cakes, pizzas and other treats to occasions where I know these types of foods will be offered, but I can't honestly say that if we weren't prepared for some reason that I wouldn't forbid him from eating them. After you've seen a child literally writhing on the bed for hours, crying from frustration, banging his head against the wall, etc. due to the reaction to a food then you decided that denying the treats until they are old enough to make the conscious decision for themselves is absolutely worth the bad rap you get as a parent from those who think you are just being overprotective.

My son and youngest daughter have multiple food sensitivities including wheat. I bring their own special treats. Since the poster didn't mention that it was due to allergies I was assuming it was because it was junk food.


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## ThreeBeans (Dec 2, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MoreThanApplesauce* 
Out of the precinct? Hummm... My understanding is that it is illegal to give food to a child that young without expressed consent. Maybe that varies from region to region?


No, it is insanely stupid and gross, but not illegal.


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## Khourtniey (May 3, 2007)

I havent read all of the responses.. but similar things happened when my son was in daycare. He was only there for a few months while my other son was in the NICU.. As soon as my other son got out of the NICU I pulled him from the daycare.. My son wasnt even a year old and they tried to feed him pizza and corn nuts.. you know those really hard things that will break adults teeth?? And to top it off they dumped the breastmilk that I sent him everyday...


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## janasmama (Feb 8, 2005)

About the filing with courts...I'm not so sure...even the AAP says minimum age to feed is 6 months. If a daycare doesn't follow AAP guidelines, then what do they follow?

This is why daycares are licensed and controlled. You can't just do whatever you want with a baby. Maybe you can at least file a complaint with the state so that it is on record.


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## 1Plus2 (Mar 13, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Cekimon* 
wow i had a similar experience but it happened right in front of me. someone gave my son some melted ice cream via their finger! and this was a relative who i regard as a "good parent." it wasn't as bad as a whole popsicle or bowl of ice cream ... it was just the melted creamy stuff but i was still livid. i think my son was between 3-4 months old and had no solids at that point.

Something very similar happened to my dd also. A family member was holding her at a get together and took some of that spray cool-whip and wiped it on her mouth and lips. My oldest dd - who is 7 1/2 - said "No!!! She can't have that! Only breastmilk!" The person who did it immediately wiped it off but I had a sick feeling for days after.


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## mamahart (Sep 25, 2007)

I am absolutely NOT minimizing the dreadful experience you had, but...I would also definitely not count this as a first food. (I like the tylenol example) And also if you have a daycare you feel good about, kind and attentive caregivers, I would be inclined to stay with stricter guidelines and education for the staff. IMO the treatment of the baby's emotional world is going to be of primary importance.
This is coming from a mama who does 90% organics for the whole family and didn't give my kids solids until they were 6-8 months old. Ick on corn syrup and dyes..


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## hummingmom (Apr 18, 2008)

Along the same lines as the Tylenol comment: While ITA that popsicles are nasty, the ingredients are actually not too different from those in Pedialyte, which is not only permitted but even "doctor recommended" for young infants. (Maybe that's how the staffer got the idea?)

_Pedialyte: Each bottle contains: water, dextrose, potassium citrate, sodium chloride and sodium citrate. Nonmedicinal ingredients: FD&C Blue #1 and Red #40 (grape flavor) and FD&C Red #40 (bubblegum flavor). Bottles of 1 000 mL (unflavored, fruit and bubble-gum flavored).

Pedialyte Freezer Pops: Each freezer pop contains: water, dextrose, citric acid, sodium chloride, potassium citrate, sodium carboxymethylcellulose and aspartame. Nonmedicinal ingredients: FD&C Blue #1 (blue raspberry flavor), FD&C Red #40 (cherry flavor), FD&C Red #40 and Blue #1 (grape flavor), FD&C Yellow #6 and Red #40 (orange flavor)._

(Dextrose is another name for corn-derived glucose, i.e., pretty much the same as corn syrup.)

So, from a mainstream medical perspective, it doesn't seem as if it would be a huge problem to let a young baby slurp on an occasional popsicle.

Scary but true!


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## NaomiMcC (Mar 22, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Stephenie* 
I would be pissed if the daycare had given any food at all to a child that young, let alone a popsicle! And even an older child shouldn't be given crap food without running it by the parents. I would look for a new daycare too.

this. I would've ripped a strip off...







:


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## NaomiMcC (Mar 22, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Khourtniey* 
I havent read all of the responses.. but similar things happened when my son was in daycare. He was only there for a few months while my other son was in the NICU.. As soon as my other son got out of the NICU I pulled him from the daycare.. My son wasnt even a year old and they tried to feed him pizza and corn nuts.. you know those really hard things that will break adults teeth?? And to top it off they dumped the breastmilk that I sent him everyday...



















































:







:hop mad





















:


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## SkiMama36 (Apr 19, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MoreThanApplesauce* 
I am not particularly sue-happy, but I would press charges.

On what grounds???


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## amyleigh33 (Nov 2, 2006)

I haven't read all the responses but considering my first allergic reaction was to a pink popsicle when I was a baby (though at least quite a bit older than yours); yeah I'd be pretty freaking LIVID if a daycare fed that garbage to my DD.

ETA: Even Pedialyte is sold with a warning not to give it to babies under 1 (I believe?) without consulting their doctor. I bought it for my DD when she had the stomach flu but she wouldn't touch it. (She's so smart














)


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## SheepNumber97245 (Apr 20, 2007)

Damn, i'm sorry to hear that.

That supervisor's response was pretty insulting. I think I would look for another daycare. It sounds like she just wrote it off like it was no big deal. I wouldn't be surprised if it happens again, just out of spite.


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## HippieWannaBe (Mar 27, 2008)

UPDATE~

So we decided to keep our son at the daycare. I looked around for other providers, but there aren't better options where we live. And he gets a TON of affection, love and cuddles where he currently is, and that is a big priority to us. I typed up a long two page letter, but my husband was not comfortable giving it to them if we weren't going to pull him out. It was basically ripping them a new a-hole, and he was very concerned that they would start to treat our son differently. So it got revised three times.

I did give him the option of telling the woman directly when he took Austin in on Monday morning, or they WERE getting a letter about it from me. He did not have the heart to tell the lady, so I took the letter in the afternoon when I picked him up. I'm glad I got to talk to the campus director, because the lady I talked to on the phone on Friday had not told her about it! I mentioned the comment she made, but not in the letter. Apparently she said, "They need to be more aware of firsts with mom's" and not "more aware with first time mom's."

Here is what I gave them.

I just wanted to clarify my discussion with Jane Doe on Friday in regards to Austin being fed a Popsicle. We have chosen to exclusively breastfeed Austin as recommended by the AAP for the first six months, with gradual introduction of solid foods between six months and one year of age. Until further notice we are requesting that Austin not be given food of any kind without our permission. I apologize if we did not make his dietary needs clear beforehand, but we did not see the need to do so, as he is only four months old.

On another note, Jason and I just adore Ms. Teacher and are very pleased with all the women who care for our son. We know that Ms. Teacher did not mean to cause any harm, but nonetheless, it was a bit upsetting to both of us.

My husband said the same thing, it's not really a "solid" and he has had Tylenol and teething pellets. I did want something in his file for the future, in case something else comes up. Thanks for all your support and advice.


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## hipmummy (May 25, 2007)

Thanks for the update The letter sended very tactful,direct and appreciative all at the same time. Let us know how it goes.


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## Twinklefae (Dec 13, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Heavenly* 
You wouldn't let a FIVE year old eat birthday cake. Um..yeah, if I was your family I would think you were off too. Everything in moderation. Denying your child any treats at all, even at special occasions will end up backfiring on you IMO.


I actually know Kat_Shoshin IRL, and yes, she meant 5 months, not 5 years. She doesn't have a 5 yo.

And my LO is allergic to milk at the moment, and may end up with his own treats at special occasions. Luckily, I've managed to scare the pants off of all his family so that they know to ASK ME before feeding him anything. (I rarely say no, they are sensibly offering him things like cucumbers.)

OP, glad to hear that you are feeling more at peace with things.


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## chirp (Feb 9, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ThreeBeans* 
It's not just sugar water. It's high fructose corn syrup, red dye forty, yellow dye 5, and a variety of toxic preservatives. Please don't minimize what they did to this baby. It was very disgusting and unhealthy.

mmmhmmm..







:

i would be crazy mad. and i like the idea of writing a letter...this way it is in writing. plus, when i'm angry about something i tend to not express myself well and leave out important points.

i'm sorry this happened! i don't think i would pull my child though, unless it happened again. plus like some others said, i would demand that my child's diet restriction be placed near or on the refrigerator. I would ask to see it, not just be told that it was/will be done.


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