# Someone tell me the secret..



## Frazzled Mama (Nov 12, 2003)

Please tell me the secret to keeping a 2 year old in his bed! He's obviously overtired but just won't stay put. I have a 6 month old that has the same bedtime and has his nightly meltdowns for about an hour. The 2 year old and has mini tantrums and wants me to lay in his bed until he falls asleep. Not easy to do with a baby who's fussing and nursing. The 2 year old also wakes up 4x per night, comes into my room and wants me to come into his bed. I usually do this but of course my infant who wakes every hour ends up crying and I have to make my way back into my own bed to nurse him back to sleep, then of course both children are up and crying.

Help..I need him to stay in his bed. Is there a gentle way to soothe him back to sleep? It seems that the older he gets, the worse our bedtime and nap routine gets. I don't want to resort to putting up a gate in front of his door (which I assume he can climb over too).


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## Dragonfly (Nov 27, 2001)

It sounds like he just really needs you at night. Maybe some of it is adjustment to the new sibling and even jealousy that the baby is sleeping with you and he is not?

Could you move his bed into your room, next to yours, for the time being?


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## sunnmama (Jul 3, 2003)

I agree he needs you.
My dd has a full sized bed in her room, so that I can sleep with her there when she needs me. When we have another, I plan to bring baby with me when dd calls (dh has never slept well in the same bed as dd--so this is what works for us).

So maybe a little bed for ds1 in your room, or a big bed for mom and kids in ds1's room?


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## Evergreen (Nov 6, 2002)

I was going to suggest the same thing. Since both kids go to bed at the sam time, have the toddle lie down quietly next to you while you nurse the baby to sleep.

I don't have a baby, but I do have an almost two year old. We bought a very cheap toddler bed and butted it up against our bed once she decided she needed more space at night. The arrangemant works great, it is easy for her to climb up into my bed at night if she needs hugs or to nurse.


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## Frazzled Mama (Nov 12, 2003)

Actually my son has a queen sized bed on the floor. I have always loved sleeping with him but he moves around alot! I have gotten a bloody nose, kicked in the face and stomach, wacked in the head. I hate to subject my baby to all that as well as myself. I try to sneak out when he's asleep to work my home business downstairs. When I move the baby into my bed, the baby cries and wakes up his big brother and then we start all over again. I am thinking that I should just give up and go to bed at 7pm with both of them


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## Mommy To Baby Roni (Mar 21, 2003)

What about putting a nap pallet on the floor in your room, since his bed is so big, with a special sleeping bag just for him?


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## Mom_on_the_move (Sep 30, 2004)

I would also suggest moving your 2 year old to your room somehow. I also have 2, a 2 year old and a 9 month old. I do sometimes have difficulty putting them both down together. If it is really hectic, I will nurse my 9 month old to sleep and then hand her off to dad until she is totally out and can be put down (yes, my girls get held a lot, and this has caused some problems at bed time). Then I can put my 2 year old down. We still cosleep with both of the girls, so that alleviates any nighttime waking problems. My 2 year old has gotten use to her sister's crys and now sleeps through the night (most of the time). Most nights, however, we all just lay down together and my 2 year old tosses and turns herself to sleep. I should add, we have a cosleeper attached to our bed, so I can move one or the other into it if they are being disturbed. We are not strict about bedtimes, and I'm sure if we were it would make it a lot more difficult. We do try to keep a routine about it, though, and that seems to help as well.

Hope this helps.







I know it is a struggle sometime! Hang in there!


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## camprunner (Oct 31, 2003)

I have a two year old. What has helped us the most is a flexible routine. As in what we do always starts the same way and she dictates most of the rest. We start out with a bath. Then she gets dressed in her pajamas and we brush her teeth. I then read her a story (she sometimes chooses to jump or run around during this but that's ok I just keep reading. sometimes she also sits and listens.) We keep the door shut during the story. Then her dad either comes in her room or we go out to him and we all say our prayer together. She kisses and hugs us both goodnight. We put her babies in her bed with her and she says "night night" and we turn out the lights and leave.

We had to start the things leading up to bedtime so she was prepared and knew what was coming. Sometimes she gets upset while we are putting her pajamas on and we hold her for a little while. Sometimes she tries to run out the door and trick us and we have to hold onto her a little longer. Sometimes she whimpers as I shut the door. If the whimpers don't last long I leave it. If the whimpers develope into a high pitched squeal I go get her. We had many high pitched squeal nights for the first two weeks or so.


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## sparklemom (Dec 11, 2001)

*Cosleep!!* At least you, the baby and the toddler should be in the same room all night (your dh elsewhere if he prefers...). I don't see how you can compassionately parent them both at night any other way.
My dds are similar ages apart as your dc. When they were that age we all slept together (actually we still all often sleep together...we like it







). I cannot imagine trying to get through the night otherwise. They're 5 and almost 4 now and still sleep together. It's just much more peaceful.
And even with the cosleeping arrangements your nights will still be long. Afterall, you essentially have two babies right now. It does get much easier.


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