# good napper, bad sleeper. Why?



## k_fw (Dec 30, 2005)

I read, with great interest, the thread about nightweaning a 5.5 month old. I am in a very similar situation with my daughter.

She has just turned 5 months and has also just switched to long naps during the day with longer awake times in between. It was a rocky couple of weeks, but the daytime results are tremendous. The nighttimes, however, have become horrible!

She falls asleep on her own around 7 each night. No crying, a little fussing, then sweet, sweet sleep. And just as I am about to turn in myself, she wakes up and the crying starts. The only thing that will soothe her is the breast, which of course means I get no rest at all.

She will go on and off the breast all night long, crying as soon as she realizes she isn't latched on. I have to admit, her cry is impressive. If my husband and I weren't so tired we would actually be impressed. She must summon up all the forces within her for the gutteral howl she lets loose.

The ridiculous thing is that she is crying like that when we are right next to her. She isn't abandonded, she isn't cold, she isn't starving...she just wants my nipple in her mouth.

Now, I am prepared to go on with this because there isn't any choice. But it would be a lot easier if I understood WHY she screams that way. Again, she can sleep on her own for naps and she even wakes up cooing and happy. Why the banshee howl at night?

I've considered the possibility of teething, but wouldn't that affect her during the day too? I would think it was a wet diaper, but sometimes the diaper is dry. (Though it is hard to keep a dry diaper on an all-night nurser.) I thought it was hunger too, but we've started her on cereal with minimal effect.

Any other ideas?

Thanks all.


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## RootBeerFloat (Nov 22, 2005)

She might just be a poor sleeper. Some kids just are. My Ally is the same way, it's exhausting but so worth it to do a good job taking care of her. It sounds like you are bedsharing, which I think is a fabulous idea. So gentle, loving, and will get you the most rest of all.

Something that I've recently become aware of is how intense the baby's internal connection is to mom. At 5 mo, your dd really doesn't know that you are a separate person, the two of you are one big babyloving blob. I think that connection to the breast is an outgrowth of that.

There is a very common sleep bump at 4 mo, maybe your dd is experiencing it late? For us it was very ugly and lasted a few weeks and then got better.

For us, dealing with sleep ills is about consistency, patience, and time. And figuring out what you can do to help yourself in between. A consistent nighttime routine and approach to nighttime parenting are really important; it sounds like you have that. Have faith that as long as you keep yourself consistent, things will improve in time. You are gently and lovingly guiding dd to good nighttime sleep.

I know this is an old hat, but are you laying down during her naps? There is very, very little more important than making sure that you are getting adequate rest, and napping when she naps is key during bad nightwaking spells.

I don't know what you're doing for diapers, but we love Fuzzi Bunz for overnight. The fleece layer helps Ally feel dry and they are very absorbent when stuffed with good hemp inserts.

Hang in there, mamma!


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## IncaMama (Jun 23, 2004)

nak

would you consider trying a pacifier so she can suck but your boobs get a break?


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## k_fw (Dec 30, 2005)

Thanks to those who responded. Just wanted to update anyone reading this that my hungry little daughter has nearly stopped the obsessive night feeding all on her own. It has taken a couple weeks, but each night she seems to be sleeping more and more. She still wakes, but fortunately not every hour.

I wish offering a pacifier would have soothed her. Unfortunately she just isn't into it and is quite aware of the difference between the breast and the rubber nipple.

Perhaps it was a growth spurt, perhaps it was the holiday blues. I'm just glad its over!


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