# learning to nap unswaddled



## indigosky (Sep 4, 2007)

DD is 6 months old and has been one of those babies who sleeps really well swaddled (until 8 days ago, she took 3 naps each day of 1-2 hours each). When we tried swaddling from time to time with her one arm free, just as an experiment, she wouldn't fall asleep. So we were prepared to keep swaddling her as long as she "needed" it to sleep well, figuring she'd let us know when she didn't need it anymore.

Well, as she's gotten really enthusiastic about rolling over we've been forced to give up the swaddle prematurely (for her). She was breaking out of it almost instantly, and if we swaddled her REALLY tightly she'd still roll over, and then end up on her stomach without use of her arms. That doesn't feel safe -- I've read that a swaddled baby should never be on her front. So we figured she needed to learn how to sleep without the swaddle cold turkey.

It's not going well, especially not at naptime. It's been 8 days of swaddle-free living so far. She manages to fall asleep without the swaddle now (sometimes more easily than others), but after 35 minutes of sleeping (almost to the dot) she wakes up. So a baby who, 8 days ago, used to nap about 4 hours a day total is now napping about 1 1/2 hours total, and she's a cranky, miserable, overtired thing. She's getting up a bit more at night, but overall she's doing OK at night -- it's naptime that's a mess. She's not sleeping any longer at night to compensate for her lost daytime sleep.

Here's what we've tried so far:

We've tried doing nothing, figuring she'd naturally find her way back to the sleep she needs, but with 3 naps a day she's now had about 24 naps, and we're not seeing progress. In fact, I'd say she's the accumulated sleep deprivation is just making her more miserable.

We've tried soothing her back to sleep at the 35 minute point when she wakes up, but it doesn't seem to work at all -- she acts wide awake at that point.

I've tried nursing her to sleep sidelying -- she falls off the breast when she falls asleep, and then wakes up 35 minutes later, even if I lay next to her the whole time. When she wakes up, she acts wide awake and doesn't want to nurse anymore.

She's never slept well while being worn, even when she was a newborn -- she's one of these babies who was like, "Put me down and leave me alone so I can sleep!" So that doesn't help. I could probably take her out for long walks in the stroller and hope she'd sleep that way, but going out for 4 hours of strollertime per day isn't realistic.

Has anyone else survived this? Ideas on how to help the poor kid get the naps she needs?


----------



## Baby Makes 4 (Feb 18, 2005)

My son did this too. He slept swaddled until he was 8 months old but then he was so strong that it didn't work anymore. He went from sleeping 2-3 hours to 45 minutes on the dot.

It sounds like your daughters natural sleep cycle is 35 minutes. What we did was go in 10 minutes or so before the 45 minute mark and give him a little jiggle. Not quite waking him up all the way but disturbing his sleep just a little bit and then soothing him back to sleep. This restarted his sleep cycle over again so we'd get another 45 minutes.

I can't remember where I read this, I think it was the Baby Whisperer. We did a very modified Baby Whisperer with no CIO.


----------



## indigosky (Sep 4, 2007)

Fascinating! What was your method of soothing him back to sleep that worked? Did he eventually learn to sleep longer on his own? Do you remember when/how long that took to happen?


----------



## Mere (Oct 1, 2002)

When ds2 outgrew his Miracle Blanket, I started swaddling him in a larger blanket and then, um, "securing" it with a scarf. It looked a little questionable, but it worked and was the only way he could sleep. Oh and FYI, ds2 is a tummy sleeper, and we would put him down on his tummy swaddled like that. He was totally fine, as he could flip over (swaddled) in an instant if he wanted to.

Around 9 months he started not liking the tight swaddle (he started to cry and struggle at bedtime). At that point I started just tightly swaddling him in the larger blanket, and then putting him down asleep and calling it good. He could of course bust out of the swaddle immediately if he wanted to, but at that point he only seemed to need it to go to sleep.

Now he's 11 months, and a loose swaddle still seems to help him get to sleep. At night though, that's it - he's swaddled for the initial go-to-sleep session and then he's out for the night.

I posted many months ago asking what to do about ds outgrowing his miracle blanket...I think the post was titled 'slave to the swaddle' or something like that. You could search for it. People gave me some good swaddling tips for older babies, complete with pictures and links to You Tube videos on swaddling!


----------



## indigosky (Sep 4, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Mere* 
Oh and FYI, ds2 is a tummy sleeper, and we would put him down on his tummy swaddled like that. He was totally fine, as he could flip over (swaddled) in an instant if he wanted to.

Yes, I've read that older thread and saw the photos of swaddled older babies -- I thought we were heading there! But I hadn't thought about the sleeping swaddled on the tummy issue. Do others have babies who sleep swaddled on their tummies? I have to admit it scares me -- she doesn't roll as well from front to back, and it would mean she couldn't push a stuffed animal off her face, etc. Maybe swaddling on the tummy is the solution here, though.


----------



## PPK (Feb 15, 2007)

Mine sleeps swaddled at 9 months and he's been able to flip front to back for a while now. At first I worried when he wasn't so good at turning, but now he flips all over the place using his legs for momentum (I don't swaddle his legs).


----------



## Lit Chick (Aug 15, 2007)

My 6 month old has been sleeping unswaddled for about a month now.
The first thing that helped him was a soft blanket. He loves a rectangle of plush minkee-like material (out of all the hand-made blankets he was gifted, he chose a remnant). He snuggles into it and it helps him sleep. We always check and make sure his face is clear.
For napping, he sleeps longer and better in the swing. We snuggle him up with paci and blankie, and he'll often be out for 2 or more hours.
He also likes white noise (fan) or soft music (his fav is the Coldplay Rockabye baby CD). With those, he'll stay awake but quiet for a bit, then gently fall asleep and stay asleep.


----------



## Baby Makes 4 (Feb 18, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *indigosky* 
Fascinating! What was your method of soothing him back to sleep that worked? Did he eventually learn to sleep longer on his own? Do you remember when/how long that took to happen?

We would go in and just move him around a bit so he stirred and maybe cracked his eyes open a hair. Then I'd put my hand on his chest (the weight feels like swaddling a bit) and jiggle him gently while shushing in his ear. Also, he was tucked in tightly, not swaddled but covered in a blanket that was tucked tightly in the sides of his mattress.

We did this day and night for a week or so (exhausting, awful week for us but no crying from him) and then he started napping longer and sleeping 11-13 hours at night with only one waking to eat.

He's almost 3 now and he still sleeps 2-3 hours in the afternoon and 11-13 hours at night.

FWIW - He hated cosleeping so he was in a crib from 6 months onward.


----------



## momtokev (Jan 15, 2008)

I can't find the slave to the swaddle thread but am very interested.. does anyone have the link? Thanks!


----------



## indigosky (Sep 4, 2007)

Wow, you guys have given me hope! I feel like we have options now -- thank you!

Here's the slave to the swaddle thread: http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=810608

and another on weaning off swaddling (or not):
http://www.mothering.com/discussions...php?p=10596175

A searching tip:
In case this is useful to anybody, I found that using Google to search the MDC forums is MUCH easier. For some reason MDC's own search function doesn't seem all that effective or easy to use. But if you go to google and do any google search, ending with the words "site:mothering.com" then Google searches only this site. So just now I searched "slave to swaddle site:mothering.com" (without the quotes) and it found the thread instantly.

I still welcome more ideas and experiences with this if there are more!


----------



## racie0417 (Mar 22, 2008)

DS only slept swaddled in a Miracle Blanket until about 8 and 1/2 months. He learned to roll at 6 months, so we used a sleep positioner to hold him in place. At 8 months, he learned how to roll while swaddled in the sleep positioner. He slept swaddled on his belly a couple nights, then I stopped swaddling cold turkey. Before we had to rock him to sleep after nursing, but now he is unswaddled he goes down drowsy, flips onto his belly, and falls asleep.

As far as the cat naps, DS took 30 minute naps until about 4 weeks ago, so I cannot help you there.


----------



## KimPM (Nov 18, 2005)

Do you think she would do well with some of those cotton pajamas that are tight-fitting? Perhaps she likes the feeling of tightness against her skin.

She could also be getting cold. Make sure whatever she sleeps in is warm enough, whatever that means for her. If her hands are getting cold, you could try either those extra long sleeve shirts that have the ends that fold over to cover the hands, or you could try sewing little cotton mittens onto the end of a long sleeve shirt (so they won't come off at night).

You could also try a Zaky or two if you think she would like the weight on her:
http://www.pregnancystore.com/zaky.htm


----------



## indigosky (Sep 4, 2007)

Things are going well around here! Once we heard that lots of people let their babies sleep on their tummies swaddled, we put our Miracle Blankets back to use (we only swaddle her arms, so they fit fine). Interestingly, for about 24 hours she still slept horribly, including the worst night of her entire life (more wakeups than when she was a newborn or was sick). Then she seemed to settle back into sleeping swaddled again, and has had 2 great nights and a lot of great naps. As I write this she's been napping for 2 1/4 hours so far -- yeah! Maybe she's catching up from a seriously sleep-deprived 10 days.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *racie0417* 
At 8 months, he learned how to roll while swaddled in the sleep positioner. He slept swaddled on his belly a couple nights, then I stopped swaddling cold turkey. Before we had to rock him to sleep after nursing, but now he is unswaddled he goes down drowsy, flips onto his belly, and falls asleep.

That's intriguing that you were able to stop swaddling cold turkey that way. Maybe in another couple weeks when she's accustomed to sleeping swaddled on her belly, we'll experiment with taking it away (or leaving an arm out).

Zakys (link above) are so cool! I'd never heard of such a thing! I don't think it's what DD needs, but it's a brilliant invention.

I have more questions for Baby Makes 4 -- I'm going to write those in a separate message.


----------



## indigosky (Sep 4, 2007)

Baby Makes 4, I had more questions for you and I was thinking about sending you a private message, but then I figured this might be of interest to others, so I'm asking my questions this way.

Even though we've returned to swaddling for now, I still like the idea of weaning off the swaddle, for a whole variety of reasons, and your situation sounds the most similar to ours. Since we might attempt this again in a few weeks or months:

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Baby Makes 4* 
We would go in and just move him around a bit so he stirred and maybe cracked his eyes open a hair.

I experimented with trying to stand right there at the 35 minute point to soothe DD back to sleep even before she really woke up -- at the first sign of stirring. Didn't work, although I really only got one good try. Did you try that, too, and conclude that you had to wake your son a little rather than wait until he woke up? It's funny: one one think that soothing at the moment they come into light sleep would work as well or better than waking them from deep sleep -- but apparently not.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Baby Makes 4* 
Also, he was tucked in tightly, not swaddled but covered in a blanket that was tucked tightly in the sides of his mattress.

Ah, that's a good tip -- we never tried that.

Did he take a pacifier at all, or do any sucking to fall asleep (nursing, sucking on one of your fingers, sucking on his own thumb/fingers)?

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Baby Makes 4* 
We did this day and night for a week or so (exhausting, awful week for us but no crying from him) and then he started napping longer and sleeping 11-13 hours at night with only one waking to eat.


Wow, that's intense. So at the end of the week, was he sleeping more/better unswaddled than he was a week or two earlier when he was sleeping swaddled? Or did he basically return to doing as well as he'd been doing when he was swaddled?

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Baby Makes 4* 
FWIW - He hated cosleeping so he was in a crib from 6 months onward.

Isn't it funny how babies don't always agree with the approaches we parents thought they and we would love? Co-sleeping was FANTASTIC for us for the first few months, but we've done lots of experimenting, and in the last few months she clearly sleeps longer and more deeply when she's not in our bed (except for last week, when she didn't sleep long or deeply anywhere!). I still bring her into bed at 5 or 6 a.m. -- often she'll nurse side-lying and fall asleep there for another couple hours.


----------

