# do you let your toddler watch television?



## Wholewheat Buns (Aug 14, 2004)

yes? no?
if yes, what kinds of things do they watch?
what things do you restrict?
and how much do they watch a day?

my son loves television and i find it very useful when i need to prepare meals or do something like get dressed in the morning.
but
i have major anxiety about it.
i dont want him to love it the way he does.
if i allowed it he would turn it on first thing in the morning and probably not shut it off.
of course that never happens but i still get anxiety about him watching it.


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## meco (Mar 1, 2004)

We watch it sometimes. Usually when sickness strikes or else when I really need it. My son loves to cook so he helps me. But if I have to get somewhere asap I might turn it on. I am on the path to being TV free for my son.

My son does not watches TV. He has seen Zoom a few times on PBS when I was sick. And some animal show that was on on the weekend. I try to not let him watch any other TV shows. I do not have cable so it makes it easy. As for videos--Only Spanish song videos, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang & Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. Oh and we watch a learn Chinese video sometimes. And not every day. Just when we really need it.

I restrict everything with licensed characters. I restrict things with violence. Pretty much anything on TV.

He does not love it though, and he could take it or leave it. He would much rather crank up the music and dance. I try to use that first. Or books. Then TV as the last resort. He would rather go outside.









I have been getting ready to read "The Plug In Drug," and I have been told once I do I will banish it forever. I am afraid! :LOL


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## AppleOrangePear (Apr 17, 2004)

HI Wholewheat if you really want to try and get rid of having the tv on or at least limit it more you could attempt during National tv free week ( its the last week of april)
Kai is almost 18 months and we dont have cable however we do have tvs ( for late night dvds movies DH and I rent..

We got rid of cable when Kai was a few months old cause it was a waste of money for us ( however before Kai we loooooved our tv we always tease and say since Friends is over we hate tv lol..we could watch 3 reruns a day in the evening)

Anyways, I really dont even know how we would fine time for it especially Kai. He likes to help with whatever Im doing and we play outside etc etc.. I see a difference already in the way he plays compared to other toddlers that watch tons of tv .........

Everyone has their personal preferences however even more then the millions of commercials i dont agree with how fast paced the images are ......

We really believe our lives are so much more fulfilled and fun without tv.. thats our joke we say even if we wanted Kai to watch tv where could we fit the time in? LOL

Now when we are somewhere and the tv is on we cant believe how silly the NEWS and all the reality shows sound.. who really cares what this famous person did or what ya neighboor did ! I read my news online lol

Michele


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## 2boys4us (Mar 26, 2005)

yeah he watches tv. Mostly disney channel and he loves thomas the tank engine and veggie tales. It's hard to say how much he watches cuz i leave the tv on most of the day ( i like it for background noise it is so quite w/o it on) but actual time is probably an hour or so that he sits and vegges


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## loveharps (Mar 16, 2005)

I let my ds watch videos, but I very rarely just let him sit in front of the tv and watch whatever is on. He has only a few videos he watches - Bob the Builder, Thomas the Tank Engine, a video about baby animals and the Wiggles. He usually only watches for about 15mins then goes and plays with his toys.


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## asherah (Nov 25, 2001)

No TV.
Some DVDs.. and he will sit and watch a whole movie in rapt attention.. then cry wanting another.

So in our house we reserve videos for when we are sick or it is raining.
And then I let him watch however many he wants.

We have Thomas the Tank Engine also, some Winnie the Pooh, a couple of Disney movies (even though I hate Disney)

He also gets to watch movies at grandparents' homes.


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## Sasha_girl (Feb 19, 2003)

We only have the TV on in the mornings. The kids are allowed to watch some PBS while I veg on the computer for a minute, drink my coffee, etc. He "watches" (which means he pays attention sometimes) to Sesame Street and Mr. Rogers.


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## matts_mamamama (Mar 19, 2004)

My son watches tv. In the morning while we're getting ready, it's immensely helpful to have Sesame Street on - he loves elmo. I cringe when he asks for it - not because it's tv, but because I can't stand elmo!! Most times if the tv is on, it's on Disney or PBS or its a dvd. He generally doesn't sit still and just watch - he is always playing or doing other things while it's on. I would feel guilty about that I bet, but he's actually learned a lot of things that I didn't think of, so I'm fine with it.

He would totally rather be outside - I think he would live out there if he could - so I actually sometimes have to use elmo to get him IN!!


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## MsMoMpls (Oct 22, 2002)

We watch a fair amount of TV... especially in winter when I just can't find enough to do all day. But mainly it is in the morning to give me a chance to get going and at night to wind down. I think like most things it is about how much and what they watch. I tend to believe in moderation.


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## miasmommy (Feb 4, 2005)

Yes, my 13 mo old DD watches a bit of tv here & there... some Sesame Street or Pooh or her Baby Einstein videos... maybe 1/2- an hour a day...

Mostly in the morning while I am getting myself together ( coffee, dressing, etc.)!!!

melanie


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## Naturalady (Apr 14, 2005)

My daughter is 10 1/2 mo. old. she loves TV. I let her watch TV as much as she wants. She watches educational and stimulating TV. KERA during the day is great. I believe that watching certain TV is very good for children. MY daughter constantly mocs the TV. Singing, dancing, ABC's, 123's, it's all great for her. I can understand with regular TV could be a disadvantage. MY husband works all day so I dont mind leaving it on a channel for her to enjoy all day. Sometimes she sits and watches TV, sometimes she's playing. When my husband is home, we eat dinner together, then she has a bath and a book at bedtime, and then we watch whatever we want. On the weekends, we go places and do thing, dont do to much TV watching then.
Hope I cold help!!
Tia


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## Vermillion (Mar 12, 2005)

We don't watch any TV at all during the day anymore. Things have been much better since I turned the TV off. He used to have some shows he enjoyed but he really doesn't seem to miss it at all.

We watch one of his Thomas DVDs together a few nights a week.


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## Tine (Jan 12, 2005)

DS never watches TV at home. No videos either. Once a week or so DS and DH play alphabet games on the computer for 20 mins. or so. We keep both the TV and computer upstairs, out of the main living area.

DS is exposed to a small amount of TV (the Wiggles and Sesame Street) at daycare, while DCP is fixing meals. However, DCP says he mostly ignores the TV and uses that time, while the 2 other kids are mesmerized, to get his paws on all his favorite toys. :LOL


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## Kristine (Sep 26, 2003)

Our household is all about moderation and the TV and computer are both tools and entertainment for us.

We watch DVDs or put things on TV onto DVD for our son to watch so he's not bombarded with commercials. That said, he WILL grow up savvy and we'll explain to him how commercials work and how to be very critical of them so that when he's older he won't be dumbfounded and taken in easily.

My son loves watching Muzzy in both french and english. Loves the old Looney Tunes cartoons on DVD, Speed Racer, Johnny Quest, lots of old cartoons that we watched growing up. Pee Wee's Big Adventure he adores (which is great for me since I've got it memorized!) and things along those lines. He spends over an hour each day intensely painting, spends lots of time reading on his own and being read to, and playing at the playground, so I don't worry at all about TV since he's not in front of it all day. Which means that I have no problem sticking in anything in that I would watch in front of him whether it's Curb Your Enthusiasm or Arrested Development, or Monty Python or The Young Ones sketches, etc.


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## Alkenny (May 4, 2004)

My little guy watches here and there. I find that if I put Noggin on, he's not interested in the shows...but when Lori and her music comes on in between, he's dancing and right there at attention with her!


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## CountryMom2e (Apr 1, 2005)

Ethan is 14 mo, and watches a smidge of TV/videos. He loves the baby einstein videos, is mildly interested in Barney or Sesame Street. I don't watch much TV with him -- the occasional Dr. Phil or Judge Judy but I try to wait for when he's napping or asleep.

I try to keep videos in reserve for when I REALLY need them. Like if he's having a clingy or fussy day and I need to make dinner. Or it's raining/snowing out and he's cooped up all day. Or if we've got a long car trip. He probably watches 1-2 videos a week.

One of the things I found that helped A LOT in cutting back was we got rid of extended and digital cable. We have basic... just the networks, PBS, and a few other channels. I save about $40 a month and the temptation to watch is just not there when you don't get much. I was so disgusted for paying all of this money and there was never anything decent on.

My brother eliminated cable all together so his kids only watch videos when they want to watch TV. I would miss Survivor, ER, and Desperate Housewives so this is a better solution for us. The only downside is we no longer get ESPN and we are huge UConn Husky basketball fans, so sometimes we have to go to a friend's house to watch a game, or listen to it on the radio.


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## Marisol (Apr 6, 2005)

We're a TV-free household -- don't even own one. I've found it to be a much easier approach than trying to monitor the content or amount of time it was being watched. My main problem with TV is that it's so passive. At this age, I want my DS to be engaged with the world around him, exploring how things work, actively observing, using his own creativity instead of being just being a fan of someone else's imaginary world.

I'm not a stick-in-the-mud about it, though. We did a transatlantic move last year and I plunked DS in front of the hotel TV tuned to PBS for about a week straight because it was the only way we could all survive the stress. I also have a couple kid-friendly movies on DVD and put DS in front of the computer to watch them during the rare times that I'm too sick to care for him properly (the stomach flu incident last year comes to mind). He is also allowed to play toddler-level educational computer games as much as he wants because I see them as being interactive and engaging a completely different part of the brain than passively watching TV.


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## Sasha_girl (Feb 19, 2003)

Quote:

I believe that watching certain TV is very good for children.
Do you have any links to back this? I've always heard the opposite.


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## ~Nikki~ (Aug 4, 2004)

No TV here, because we don't watch TV. And I'm not about to subscribe to cable just so that my toddler can watch Dora.









She does have a few DVD's and video's that she will occasionally request to watch. Mostly Baby Einstein (which she doesn't like anymore), and a couple of Thomas the Train/Teletubbies/Barney videos that were given to us (ugh).


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## AppleOrangePear (Apr 17, 2004)

{I believe that watching certain TV is very good for children.}

Dont really wanna debate and I shouldnt even post this however VERY GOOD for children?









Of course Im sure a lil tv is gonna outright kill achild or deform them









however I have noticed more and more and especially when I was working as a therapist with children>> Kids these days tend to not have much of their own imagination. they are to busy copying images and people they see on tv... everyone has different choices however for us:

We are allowing our DC the opportunity to create and build his OWN imagination









Michele


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## TanyaMT (Dec 17, 2003)

I took the question at first to mean the actual television until I read some responses so I'll break it down .... no broadcast TV but he is allowed to watch videos in the afternoon after his and before dinner. It is usually about 3:30 or 4 p.m. until 5 p.m. or so so about 1 to 1-1/2 hours most days during the week. None on the weekends as we are usually out and about.

He has Thomas the Tank Engine, Veggie Tales, one Little People video that came with his set, Baby Einstein tapes, etc. He also has a home video of a trip to the zoo with the whole family that he likes to watch, both to see the animals and all the family (grandma, grandpa, auntie, cousin, etc).


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## AppleOrangePear (Apr 17, 2004)

{I took the question at first to mean the actual television}

I think thats what the OP was looking for however all our posts should answer her questions anyway









Michele


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## captain optimism (Jan 2, 2003)

We don't have a TV, because I can't use it moderately.

When we are visiting other people, like my parents for example, if ds wants to turn on the TV, and it's not the sabbath, I let him. He likes to change the channels and make the special menus come up on the screen. So far it hasn't been a problem for me.

At one point some months ago he woke up while we were watching a DVD on our computer during his nap, but he found the images too overwhelming so we shut it off. He likes the animations that you get on the internet quite a lot though. We have used them to pacify him for a few minutes at a time. But it's not that great to get him interested in the computer, because then he's all into pressing all the buttons to see what happens! Hard to protect documents and stuff that way. Oh yeah, he also likes me to put on my yoga video on the computer and get out the yoga mats so we can do yoga.

I am satisfied that he's not a drooling cartoon or movie junkie at 26 months. He's better than I am!


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## artgoddess (Jun 29, 2004)

> Quote:
> 
> 
> Originally Posted by *Wholewheat Buns*
> ...


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## kamilla626 (Mar 18, 2004)

Dd watches a fair amount of TV; almost exclusively commercial free toddler-friendly shows (Noggin, PBS, videos).

I don't disagree that TV _can_ be harmful for some kids, depending on the content, and the amount of time they're spending watching. But I think dd has learned a lot from TV.

She knows the ABC's, can count to 13 (skipping numbers sometimes), knows the difference between a lemur, a monkey, and a sloth; knows how a lobster swims and how a bird hatches from an egg.

She is also a real bookworm, so I'm sure she's learned a lot from books too, but I don't feel that the TV she watches is doing any damage.


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## Beansmom (May 26, 2004)

Well DH likes to have the TV on all day as background noise. This time of year it is usually on a baseball game. DD never really pays any attention to it. Occasionally, like first thing in the morning while we are still waking up, I will turn it to Noggin or Disney or something and watch a little with dd. I like the Wiggles







: DD seems to like Seseme Street. It's weird because when I turn on a childrens program she will watch it but when dh has it on ESPN or something she pays no attention to it. So, the tv is on a lot but I'd say she actually pays attention to maybe a half hour total. When I do watch something for her I will hold her on my lap and talk about the show with her. I wish the TV would be off more, but







If I notice her getting entranced by it or wanting to watch it instead of do other things I will definitely limit it, but right now she seems like she could care less about it anyway.


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## AppleOrangePear (Apr 17, 2004)

Heck more then the commercials and the content its how fast the tv images move whether it is cable or dvds and such.. JMO...

Michele


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## sagira (Mar 8, 2003)

We've been living at our in-laws' house but we're going to move in a month or so























In laws LOVE (I repeat, LOVE) TV and have it constantly on. They would never understand what all the fuss is about. Dh loves to unwind in front of the TV after a long day at work (as a child, TV was his babysitter, he tells me







).

I used to watch little TV. Here's what I do now to counteract all that. I don't turn on the TV at all during the day and at night it's mostly on a baseball or basketball game (ds loves basketball).


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## rainbowfairymomma (Mar 31, 2004)

Actually TV shows, no
Movies and DVD's occasionally yes.
In all honesty the commercials scare me, I can sensor what he watches when its a movie and really limit the amount that he watches. (i.e. when this movie is over that's all for today etc...)
However, the more pregnant I get the more I find myself letting him







: Hopefully that will change a bit more when the baby comes :LOL


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## kathipaul (Sep 24, 2004)

We watch tv in our house. We don't watch violent stuff with dd in the room, like news or law n order. DD usually pays no attention to what we are watching. Dh likes to watch ball games and they talka little about what is happening. I like to watch hgtv. Dd like to watch wiggles, sesame street, thomas the train and tv shows with music. She loves to dance. She doesn't like to watch alone. The only shows she will watch alone are boobah and teletubbies, which she sits and stares at, so I don't let her watch that.

I think that because we don't make a big deal out of tv and we don't restrict it, she does not want to watch it that much. She is more active and prefers to play. She does loves music, however, and loves dvd's or shows with lots of that. We sing and dance along.


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## kathipaul (Sep 24, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ArlyShellandKai*
Heck more then the commercials and the content its how fast the tv images move whether it is cable or dvds and such..

I agree.


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## Rainbowbird (Jul 26, 2004)

Yes, we let DS watch TV. However we monitor it closely. I try to limit it to one hour a day. He watches PBS (Sesame St., Zaboomafu, sometimes Dragon Tales) but no regular network TV. I don't want him exposed to commercials (even though there are some on PBS now, they are not as bad as the others) and even movie trailers that are on in the morning on the networks are quite inappropriate for children.

He also has several Thomas DVDs. He was addicted to these for awhile and he still likes them, but generally he will only watch for about 15 min. and then starts playing.

I used to worry as you are, but then when I saw that he wasn't just sitting there and begging for it all the time I relaxed. Also, in the nice weather he would much rather be outside. The one thing he really does hate to miss is Elmo, but if we have somewhere to go or he is given a chance to go outside, he will happily skip it.

The one time I do let him watch a lot of TV is when he is sick or I am sick!


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## bobica (May 31, 2004)

yes, every day









_if yes, what kinds of things do they watch?_ sesame street & signing time. sometimes blues clues. Noggin & PBS

_what things do you restrict?_ most everything else :LOL i'm creeped out by Oobi & stuff like that. dora yells. barney is cult-y. (JMHO







) yep, sesame street & signing time are the 2 maistays!

_and how much do they watch a day?_ On an average day, sesame street is on for 1 hour but she's in & out of the room. then usually a 1/2 hour of something during her veg out time in the afternoon or when i'm needing to make dinner. if she's sick or i'm desperate & we can't get out of the house, she can watch some sesame street or muppet dvd's randomly. if she's with my mom, she watches more.


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## swngrrl (Nov 24, 2002)

Yes, we're a TV family. 2.5 year old DS watches Dora every day. I like the program for the most part because it is *interactive* which I do not see in other children's programs. When Dora tells him to "Jump!" he jumps up! He answers her questions, and gets involved in the "choices". I also like that it uses alot of Spanish.

We occasionally watch Blues Clues, Sesame Street, Dragontales, Ms. Spider, and 64 Zoo Lane. We typically watch an episode of something in the morning while everyone's getting ready to leave for school/work, and occasionally another episode in the evening, while dinner is being prepared.

Every Saturday we have a family movie night, and watch an age appropriate DVD as a family, complete with popcorn and "special juice".

I think the biggest problem with TV and children is the commercialization. Kids don't understand it. I am shocked when I'm exposed to commercials myself these days. All our TVs have Replay (Tivo) units, and the commercials are auto-skipped when we watch a program. We very, very rarely watch a show live. I think if we didn't have the replay I'd be alot less likely to let ds watch as much TV as he does (which really is around 1 hour or less a day).


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## melaniewb (Mar 14, 2003)

My son is a big Wiggles fan! He watches them once a day, everyday. I'm okay with that.


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## AppleOrangePear (Apr 17, 2004)

just curious arent cartoons part of commercialism?
(thomas the tank, blues clues, dora etc)?

Michele


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## Rox5266 (Nov 26, 2004)

I don't think Dora etc. is a part of commercialism. Not the way the network kids shows are - no commercials. :LOL

My ds watches Noggin and PBS. My Mom who is my DCP started him on TV, I probably would not have got him watching before age 2.







:

But, so far, no harm done. He is not mesmerized, captivated or otherwise addicted to TV. He runs around and plays, and would rather be outside (but it is too cold in the NE USA in the winter so he doesn't get out alot then).

He is learning a lot from these shows, like how to count etc. So for now, I will let him watch as much TV as he likes, but really he could take it or leave it, it is not that important to him.

Roxanne
Daniel 8/9/03


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## octobersweethearts (Feb 27, 2004)

Our 26mth old twin girls are media free - no tv, no videos.

I have done a lot of reading on the subject and feel pretty strongly about it. So without getting up on my soapbox, I would highly recommend the book, Endangered Minds: Why Our Children Don't Think and What We Can Do About It by Jane Healy, PhD


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## melaniewb (Mar 14, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *octobersweethearts*
Our 26mth old twin girls are media free - no tv, no videos.

I have done a lot of reading on the subject and feel pretty strongly about it. So without getting up on my soapbox, I would highly recommend the book, Endangered Minds: Why Our Children Don't Think and What We Can Do About It by Jane Healy, PhD









Yes, but we all know that "reseach" can be skewed to fit either side of an issue- with every issue.

I personally think TV in moderation is fine for a child, especially those over age 2. 20 minutes a day is not *that* bad, and well, I need my sanity sometimes.


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## wednesday (Apr 26, 2004)

I was going to say "no" but then I realized DS does have some exposure to TV. We live with my MIL & FIL and sometimes DS's cousins come over and turn on cartoons. DS doesn't seem to pay any attention. I don't ban TV in his presence but we never turn it on just for him, and don't have any videos for him. DH and I aren't big TV-watchers ourselves so we just don't think of it







. When he is older if it seems like he is getting drawn into the cartoons I will probably try to limit his exposure--suggest another activity, I guess, or just make it clear we don't find it acceptable--but for now I just let it go. Sometimes my MIL will have the golf channel on all day but the only risk there is a person might get bored to death :LOL .

My reasons for wanting to limit TV are several: (1) the research linking TV-viewing in children under 2 to a higher incidence of ADD by elementary age; (2) the intense, manipulative marketing that is designed to make a child feel like they can not live without a particular product (I don't think it is good for their self-esteem OR for the parent-child relationship for a child to be continuously primed to want things the parent is going to refuse to buy); (3) the "displacement" concept, that is the idea that time spent watching TV is time taken away from physical play, creative play, and so on, thereby stunting a child's physical and intellectual development; (4) the "attitude" and coarseness displayed by typical characters in children's cartoons/programming, and the way parent/teacher figures are shown as stupid and it is cool to be sneaky and get away with stuff; (5) the link between TV-watching and obesity. There's more but those are the highlights. The only even moderately persuasive counter-argument I've ever heard is how some quality programming can be educational because it shows things children wouldn't otherwise have the opportunity to see, like nature or travel programs. That may be so, but I don't find that compelling enough in light of the various negatives.


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## meco (Mar 1, 2004)

Roxy, I respectfully disagree. Dora, Thomas, et al. are *definitely* part of commercialism.

Notice when you go to your local store all the Dora & Thomas tie ins? I can buy a lunchox, a t shirt, a beach towel, an outfit, shoes, a sheet set, many accessories, hats, socks? Heck, I could do a whole room in either motif.

Quote:

com·mer·cial·ism
n.
1. The practices, methods, aims, and spirit of commerce or business.
2. An attitude that emphasizes tangible profit or success.
I think Dora and Thomas definitely emphasize tangible profits no? Commercials are not necessary to commercialism.

Also, I dislike the "no harm done" statement. Perhaps everyone should revisit that after a decade rather than a year kwim? Not really long enough of a time to make such a judgement IMO. Who knows how TV will affect your child in the long term.

My thought is: _There is no harm in *not* letting your child watch TV._
We has one tiny TV to 8 people growing up so my TV time was non-existent. I have fond memories of being outdoors, interacting with my siblings, pretend and imaginary play, family time, etc. I want my son to have those memories. And I can out unscathed from not watching TV. I survived.

Octobersweethearts, I am going to check out that book and see what it says. *The Plug In Drug* comes highly recommended too so I am going to read them both. I am on my way and incentives to get it done are great









I do think TV causes problems in society, and I strive to be TV free for my child's benefit. And I definitely think there is a benefit to it. Is there a benefit to TV? Well that is to be determinded. My thoughts are not as many as not watching TV.

sohj also posts great thoughts on being TV free. Worth checking out


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## melaniewb (Mar 14, 2003)

Ah, well, just lump me in with all the other "bad" moms out there because we do allow some tv. Heck, when DS is sick, or I'm sick, he gets even MORE tv. *gasp*.

But you know what, I really, really don't believe he is being harmed. He doesn't sit in front of the TV all day, and there are days it isn't on. This is anecdotal evidence, but still proves my point to an extent. I grew up with unlimited TV, as did my sisters. Yet, all of us have post-graduate degrees and are intelligent. I even received a scholarship to law school. I can think on my own and much perfer books to TV. I grew up watching mainstream America shows and yet I still turned out to be a fairly crunchy mom who questions everything. Again, I can think for myself.

And, really, I think forbidding kids from watching tv at all will backfire when they are older. I've seen it happen with youth that I work with.


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## meco (Mar 1, 2004)

Melanie, no one called you a "bad" mom. Any feelings of guilt or otherwise are not here. No one called you anything as far as I can see.

I for one do not equate degrees and intelligence with TV one way or the other. I never saw anyone say a person would be unsuccessful or stupid if they watch TV. Did I miss a post?









Quote:


Originally Posted by *wednesday*
(1) the research linking TV-viewing in children under 2 to a higher incidence of ADD by elementary age;
(2) the intense, manipulative marketing that is designed to make a child feel like they can not live without a particular product (I don't think it is good for their self-esteem OR for the parent-child relationship for a child to be continuously primed to want things the parent is going to refuse to buy);
(3) the "displacement" concept, that is the idea that time spent watching TV is time taken away from physical play, creative play, and so on, thereby stunting a child's physical and intellectual development;
(4) the "attitude" and coarseness displayed by typical characters in children's cartoons/programming, and the way parent/teacher figures are shown as stupid and it is cool to be sneaky and get away with stuff;
(5) the link between TV-watching and obesity.

These are all valid concerns. None of which have to do with what degree you obtain. They do have to do with physical, emotional and mental well being. Plenty of people with physical, emotional and mental problem obtain degrees. One is not because of the other. Plenty of non TV watchers have post-graduate degrees. I also not think childhood TV watching necessarily makes for crunchy either way. I do not see a correlation between the two.

I am curious as to evidence showing TV is good for you or does not harm you. Does such a study exist?

And as for me (I cannot speak for everyone else) I do not forbid anything. My son prefers to do other things







He could watch if it he wants, but he would rather go to the park. I am curious as to how it backfires though.

I _personally_ did not watch a lot of TV, and I think my imagination and creativity stems from that. I would love for my son to be imaginative and creative. If I think mine stemmed in part from not watching TV, well, it might work for him. Again my thought is: There is no harm in *not* letting your child watch TV. I would like to see evidence that shows me my son needs to watch TV.


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## AppleOrangePear (Apr 17, 2004)

I will just say:
BIG HUGE PASSIVE, Babysitting OBJECT is NOT for us..
Use it how you may .. no need to use excuses to justify.. I believe the OP rightfully asked do you or dont you watch tv and if so how much?.....

Even leaving out all the research against it for toddlers especially 0-3yrs Our family doesnt have time for it

I personally am not for toddlers learning to 'decode' letters and numbers just by hearing or seeing something on tv.. there is a certain time when children are truly ready to learn to read and write.. I laugh when moms i know brag that their DC can count and such at such a young age...

It starting to make sense children are pushed to read earlier however when it comes to reading comprehension there isnt much of it........ WHole other topic though.. oops










Michele


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## melaniewb (Mar 14, 2003)

Meco- sorry, I'm on edge today because DS has been a little pill. Sorry. I'm really not defensive about this thread, but others that run the gamut on MDC about how "bad" TV is.

Sorry.


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## melaniewb (Mar 14, 2003)

Quote:


I am curious as to evidence showing TV is good for you or does not harm you. Does such a study exist?
I have read a book on this and it did support that minimal TV can be good for the brain, depending on the type of show, etc. Again, it was MINIMAL tv- as in no more than one 20-30 minute show a day, but not necessarily that much. This goes for videos as well as TV. I will try to find the name of the book.

My point though is that you can "research" anything you want and have results skewed to fit your idea. I'm not denying that TV/videos can be harmful, and I do think that many american families watch way too much. However, I don't think that it is all that harmful in small doses, and I do think it can be a learning tool in some situations.

For example, in my counseling program, we often watch videos of various counselor's rechniques. There is no other way to really get a feel for a real session unless you see one. You can read about it all you want, but you can't see the facial expressions and body language nuances in a book. These both play a huge role in counseling. Obviously, this example is more extreme than your kids watching Baby Einstein or something, but I am just illustrating the point that not all TV is bad.


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## edamommy (Apr 6, 2004)

yep. He never was interested in tv until about 19 months. Then he LOVED it and it was like a little vacation for me! As he was/is a high needs infant/baby and I was so exhausted for his first 1+yrs of life. It was truly a dream the first time dora came on and he just stood there mesmorized. But, at 2yrs exactly the fun was over and he has no interest in it anymore.


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## meco (Mar 1, 2004)

Well, I do not think you are anything because of TV. I am sorry you are having a run with your son. Oddly enough my son has been a pill as of late too :LOL Must be in the air







I hope it gets better.

And in my OP I said my son watched TV from time to time especially when he is or I am sick so I feel you. No one is perfect all the time, least of all me







I would never judge you for anything especially watching TV or parenting as you see fit. The judgement does suck sometimes. Ok, all the time :LOL

Thanks for the response. I had never heard that. I appreciate the info. I can see how it might benefit adults. I was curious about children too. Interesting though.

Quote:

My point though is that you can "research" anything you want and have results skewed to fit your idea.
I agree with this one hundred percent.


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## Wholewheat Buns (Aug 14, 2004)

ArlyShellandKai said:


> I will just say:
> BIG HUGE PASSIVE, Babysitting OBJECT is NOT for us..
> Use it how you may .. no need to use excuses to justify.. I believe the OP rightfully asked do you or dont you watch tv and if so how much?.....
> 
> ...


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## AppleOrangePear (Apr 17, 2004)

WHole wheat buns ( love the name )









Dh was a big tv fan and so was I to a point ... However when kai was a few months old we realized we didnt want to spend 50 something dollars a month when we were busy with Kai. We had it disconnected and was planning on having it back on in a few months. WIth in that time I began doing some reading and also realized I wasnt gonna have time for TV. When we were first without it it felt really strange since we seemed to have it on for background noise. After the first few weeks I began to feel like I had way more time in our day. Im not trying to talk you into TV FREE however if you wanna try it maybe do it during National Turn your tv off wk ( last week of April). From the time we awaken in the morning to the time Kai goes to sleep I honestly couldnt even fine time to have it on and more so I dont see how Kai would have time to watch it..
We arent an overscheduled family by no means however we have a pretty good rhythm in our home of how our days go ( rain or shine) Kai appreciates this as he knows what to expect and toddlers love that.

If you truly are questioning yourself I would do some more reading and really feel what you want say outta your day and such. Maybe start a rhythm of some sort. If you would like ideas and such I would love to help









We also do lots of crafts, nature Table and such































What i find funny is all of you who do allow your toddlers to watch tv IM the one that feels i get beaten up for NOT having tv on ( not here but my side of the family LOL)

Michele


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## Wholewheat Buns (Aug 14, 2004)

question for all you notvmoms.
you dont even let your little1s watch movies like alice in wonderland or aladin or anything?
what is the the biggest concern for you about television and children?
the main reason you choose no tv?
what about music?

my son loves music.
he also loves reading. Often sitting through 5 or 6 of his books. (lately he doesnt seem so interested though and im worried that its because of the tv. Could it be? oh no!)

also fyi i dont use the tv as a "babysitting object" like the other poster calls it.
ahhh i was gonna go on but yeah i guess shes right i dont need to justify or "make excuses"







:


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## MsMoMpls (Oct 22, 2002)

All my childhood my mother told me that all that TV was going to rot my mind. Funny thing I figured out in adulthood, she hated TV because she has always been really hyperactive and just couldn't sit still. I turned out ok. I know that sounds lame, but I just don't think it is that big of an influence for good or for bad, there are so many more powerful influences than TV in our house. It is a tool, sometimes used poorly but just a tool. I watch a lot of TV. It is on a lot. I have decided that this isn't even on my list of things I would like to change about my life. There are other things that matter more than TV.


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## AppleOrangePear (Apr 17, 2004)

{question for all you notvmoms.
you dont even let your little1s watch movies like alice in wonderland or aladin or anything?

Not at this age Kai is only 18 months. It may be different when he is much older . He will then have a choice of the matter. HOwever at this age and through his younger yrs there is much more better things for him to be enjoying.

what is the the biggest concern for you about television and children?
the main reason you choose no tv?

Neurologically speaking the rapid images> Some beleive older children are having more difficulties sitting still reading a book because their brains seem to be wired to except fast images such as TV. ( not saying this is the case everytime of course)

I dont fear tv >> right now it just doesnt fit into OUR lives.

I dont see so much of a problem with adults and such watching however I believe some elders get so tied into knowing what others are doing and getting sucked into the media that it is detramental to their health.

what about music?

We dont have any CDs and such with children singing ( well actually his Music Together CDs do have some childrens voices.. I tend to listen to some and then sing them to him.. ( BTW I love the Naturally You Can Sing Cds)
He typically has a variety of all types of music and he loves Folk .. I believe it is most important to feel free and sing to your child.

Michele


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## Dechen (Apr 3, 2004)

My dd watches dvds - Baby Einstein, The Wiggles, and Signing Times. Once in a blue moon the Teletubbies or Once Upon a Potty (yes, the dvd of the book. For shame







).

I am not a tv person, nor is my dh. We don't have cable. We don't watch tv. I have found that for dd, dvds help calm her down. In an ideal world I'd prefer she not watch tv at all, but I find it works for us and I don't feel badly about it. Dd is high energy and spirited. Her natural state is on the move. She does not veg out to tv, but it helps calm her down. Like nursing does. She loves the Wiggles' music - she dances along and sings and I dance with her. Other times she plays with her toys while the show is on in the background.

I am not worried about her growing up abusing tv. Dh and I are readers. We read with her, she sees us reading all the freaking time. I have a lot of physical energy (she gets it from me) so she and I play outside and run and jump and keep active. Its all balance.


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## Kristine (Sep 26, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ArlyShellandKai*
I will just say:
BIG HUGE PASSIVE, Babysitting OBJECT is NOT for us..
Use it how you may .. no need to use excuses to justify.. I believe the OP rightfully asked do you or dont you watch tv and if so how much?.....

I personally am not for toddlers learning to 'decode' letters and numbers just by hearing or seeing something on tv.. there is a certain time when children are truly ready to learn to read and write.. I laugh when moms i know brag that their DC can count and such at such a young age.


Yes, heaven forbid they can count at a young age! One can only imagine the horrors that lay in store for these children armed with an understanding of letters and numbers. Gasp...

Since you say there is a "certain time" when children are ready to learn to read and write, could you please elaborate a little further and tell us exactly when this is? It sounds like from the ages of 0-3 this is verboten. Do they magically start learning things on the day after their third birthday? And if a child DOES learn something from TV, or a computer, or a book, or a sign on the road on their own, please explain how you know that they AREN'T ready to do these things if they are denied certain things to begin with because they don't fit into your personal worldview?

These threads always start out fine and then get to the point where logic takes a backseat. The posts about the link the TV and obesity, etc. are hilarious beyond belief. Let's look at some other things that cause obesity: lack of exercise, a poor diet, and bad genes. The first of these two can be taken care of provided there is a parent around to set a good example. What study could link TV alone to obesity?? It simply couldn't! It's what you do or don't do whether in front of the TV or not that is the problem. Sitting in front of the TV eating potato chips and drinking pop will reap different results than a child eating a healthy meal and spending hours outdoors before watching TV, or after for that matter.

I understand that this is a hot button topic, but when children are denied things all it means is they'll be even more curious to try it when they're older and then they'll have no guidance and truly be at the mercy of advertisers. There is this thing called moderation, yet I wonder if people have problems with this in their life.


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## melaniewb (Mar 14, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kristine*
Yes, heaven forbid they can count at a young age! One can only imagine the horrors that lay in store for these children armed with an understanding of letters and numbers. Gasp...

Since you say there is a "certain time" when children are ready to learn to read and write, could you please elaborate a little further and tell us exactly when this is? It sounds like from the ages of 0-3 this is verboten. Do they magically start learning things on the day after their third birthday? And if a child DOES learn something from TV, or a computer, or a book, or a sign on the road on their own, please explain how you know that they AREN'T ready to do these things if they are denied certain things to begin with because they don't fit into your personal worldview?

These threads always start out fine and then get to the point where logic takes a backseat. The posts about the link the TV and obesity, etc. are hilarious beyond belief. Let's look at some other things that cause obesity: lack of exercise, a poor diet, and bad genes. The first of these two can be taken care of provided there is a parent around to set a good example. What study could link TV alone to obesity?? It simply couldn't! It's what you do or don't do whether in front of the TV or not that is the problem. Sitting in front of the TV eating potato chips and drinking pop will reap different results than a child eating a healthy meal and spending hours outdoors before watching TV, or after for that matter.

I understand that this is a hot button topic, but when children are denied things all it means is they'll be even more curious to try it when they're older and then they'll have no guidance and truly be at the mercy of advertisers. There is this thing called moderation, yet I wonder if people have problems with this in their life.
































I especially love your first part about letters and numbers. My son learned all of his letters and numbers by 20 months and could count actual objects by 2. He learned it from BOOKS and from just being out and doing things/seeing things. Should I have hindered him perhaps? Discourage him from learning naturally even though it was early?


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## asherah (Nov 25, 2001)

My ds watched NO TV at all until he was 2 1/2.
We have gradually introduced movies and dvds since then.

I am comfortable with the small amount he watches.
So, I am not going to make any excuses at all.

I will say that I don't always think for-profit equals evil. People have to make a living. I personally like to profit from my labor.
My issue with commercialization comes from using beloved characters to sell unhealthy, unrelated things.
For example, I don't have problems with the existance of Dora or Thomas T-shirts.
I would have HUGE problems with Dora being used to sell fast food hamburgers.
There is a vast difference to me. I don't object in a knee-jerk fashion to the whole CONCEPT of merchandising. I make mindful decisions about merchandising.
We don't have Dora stuff, but I have no issues with the Thomas stuff we have.
If Thomas is used to sell vaccinations.. well, then I will have issues.


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## Tanibani (Nov 8, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Wholewheat Buns*
question for all you notvmoms.
you dont even let your little1s watch movies like alice in wonderland or aladin or anything?
what is the the biggest concern for you about television and children?
the main reason you choose no tv?

I like this article:
Passive Brains Retain Sensations, not Information








I'm a "no TV mom" but DH







doesn't agree with me and takes him to the movies







and watches TV with him "on occassion." More of a treat rather than a daily thing.

Since we disagree SO strongly, I am willing to live with this compromise.









Out of sheer desperation/exhaustion during pg, I let him watch a few Disney movies here and there. I am not perfect.







I do my best.

I would LOVE to be able to plop him down for 1 hour a day to watch something, _but I know better._ I always had a nagging little voice inside me say it wasn't a good idea.

I remember reading an awesome cautionary Baby Magazine article (in 2000) about TV watching and young children. I knew the AAP was anti-TV for the first 2 years.









At age 2, I put Sesame Street on, thinking it was "educational." I was shocked
1) it was 1 hour long
2) he was totally addicted

Then I picked up Endangered Minds: Why Children Don't Think and What we Can Do About it by Jane Healy.

She wrote this for the AAP.

Basically, her thesis is that all experience shapes the brain... and TV viewing maybe be shaping the brain in ways that is NOT condusive to problem-solving, rational thought. She said, across the board, all the educators she spoke to across the country report the same thing... kids today are not as bright as they were a generation ago. Apparently, curriculums are dumbed-down.









She devotes a whole chapter to how BAD Sesame Street is (fast moving images, short vignettes...) for the developing brain.







Makes ya wonder.

Anyway, I bought the book on the spot and turned it off for good. DS had a hard time at first, but then he was OK with it.

DS has a WONDERFUL attention span (for books and live theater) and I credit that to No TV.

When and if we do watch stuff, we do it together so we can talk about it, evaluate it, process it.

WholeWheatBuns... nobody on MDC is perfect! I'm not judging you (or anybody else.) We are all doing our best... if you don't like the way you experienced your childhood (neither do I!) then think about what * you * would have liked.

I too, spent way too much time watching TV alone. I grew up in NYC, a rich cultural city... and I didn't see a Broadway play or visit a museum till I was in JH & HS.









I don't want my son to be passive. We take him out for adventures (the zoo, the pet shop, whatever...) I want him to have more of what I didn't have - experiences.

Riding a real snow sled is way better than watching Elmo or Dora do it on TV.

Playing with a real train set (or riding a real train) is way better than watching Thomas the Tank Engine.

(I would personally prefer the same thing myself... the real thing, vs. the fake thing on TV.)

My son learned colors, numbers, letters, from - gasp - me. Nobody * needs * Baby Einstein DVDs for that... but that's not what marketers tell young parents.

It's hard being a parent these days... marketing a is huge problem. Nobody is going to market "natural family living" because there is no money to be made there.

*Music*
My son also loved music around age 2-3... great... encourage that... take him to local, live area children's concerts if you can, or free adult shows... buy kid CDs or adult music... encourage dancing/movement.


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## bluey (Apr 28, 2004)

Hmmmm this is something I have been thinking about a lot recently. They watch a 1/2 "toon" in the morning and then nothing else. Mostly gives me a chance to shower/dress/make breakfast and what have you. :LOL They've got better things to do than watch tv all day. I don't make an issue out of it though, I figure that would just make it more desirable.

Now when I was a kid, we didn't watch tv ever. We had one, dad would watch the news when he got home and then nothing else until after we went to bed. Sometimes they would rent a vcr (dating myself here lol) and we could watch a movie. When I moved in with my dh (then bf) the tv was on 24/7 - it's what he grew up with. ( His mom was a "dcp" of sorts who used the tv to entertain the kids. I honestly don't think the tv ever gets turned off at her house







Very.Annoying.) So I quickly got used to the constant noise but once the kids started arriving, it really started bothering me. So now it's off. There are still movies on occasion though. We have a huge collection







: So she (the oldest) asks for a movie every once in awhile.


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## meco (Mar 1, 2004)

The defensiveness makes me think there are other issues. Why get so bothered if you are content with your decisions?

I assume most have read studies and theories from both sides before you made your decision. You balanced the good and bad on both sides to come to your conclusions? Just like any other important decision in your child's life, I assume people have researched it thoroughly and knows why they are chose what they did.

The studies I read today while reading about this thread make a TV watching (not in moderation like the average child who watched 4 hours a day)---->sedentary lifestyle connection. Which as a PP mentioned is attributed to obesity. So while not an A to B connection, it is an A leads to B which causes C. A causal relationship.

Imagine everyone's shock when my son learned his ABCs and to count in Spanish and English not from some cartoon but from his me







And he is learning Spanish, not from Dora, but from his family.

So Kristine, I ask you since you ridiculed everyone was is not pro-TV, what benefits do you see TV providing for your children?

I have no issue with TV every once in awhile. I am working on this now, and I hope to be TV free though. As a single mom it can be difficult but I have decided it to be the best for me. I am not forbidding my son from anything, just providing many alternatives. As I mentioned earlier, when my son was sick and wanted nothing but me a bit of a movie was beneficial to my sanity. I do not think it was critical to his emotional, physical or mental well being. But I find it odd that people are so bothered by people choosing not to watch TV. Why is it an issue?

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kristine*
I understand that this is a hot button topic, but when children are denied things all it means is they'll be even more curious to try it when they're older and then they'll have no guidance and truly be at the mercy of advertisers. There is this thing called moderation, yet I wonder if people have problems with this in their life.

Well I was "denied" many things, but they are nothing I am curious or interested in. Racism was forbidden in my house, but I am not curious about it. Same with violence and hate. So your blanket statement is a generalization and does not apply to everyone. I was never forbidden from watching TV. I was taught there are more interesting things in life than to waste hours each day watching the box. I would have rather done other things. It just did not appeal to me. I found it to be a bit of a bore most of the time.

And I never was nor am I now at the mercy of advertisers. Care to elaborate? My son and I went to ride the ferris wheel in Times Square today, and while in the toy store he did not cry for one thing. He is satisfied looking. I was able to go in and out without his begging for one silly licensed or otherwise toy.

And implying any of us have issues with moderation is "hilarious beyond belief." How would you know what me (or my sibling or any of us) have trouble with? None of us (my siblings) suffer from any traditional addictions, minor or serious. None of us overindulge--except for the occasional meal or in travel (if there is such a thing). I am pretty much your poster girl for moderation. So how is it that I/we escaped unscathed?


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## meco (Mar 1, 2004)

The OP asked people their toddler's TV habits and the decisions behind them. All posters are doing is answering this question. Sometimes a poster is asked to clarify or elaborate. And ridiculing people's opinions is not the purpose. There are many threads to debate TV. Sorry, Wholewheat for threadjacking.









Tanibani, great post.

I live in Manhattan now, and we love nothing more than to explore the riches of the city. I take my son all over to see it all. And he has a great time. The city is an amazing playground and classroom.

Wholewheat: Music is very important to us. My son's father is a musician, and my son is as well. We play a lot of music on our intruments as well as listen to CDs. My son could recognize the Beatles by ear out and about. When PLing at 25 months, my son asked for dancing and music as a reward (rather than sweets, stickers, a toy, etc).







And every day we do a lot of dancing, movement and singing--part of our routine.









I chose to eliminate the little TV we watched because I do not think there are any benefits. TV is just not important to me. Nothing I have seen or read makes me think it is critical to my son's childhood.


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## wednesday (Apr 26, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kristine*
These threads always start out fine and then get to the point where logic takes a backseat. The posts about the link the TV and obesity, etc. are hilarious beyond belief.

Excuse me? The research is out there on this, it's not like I made it up. There is a direct correlation between time spent viewing TV and the likelihood/degree that a person is overweight/obese--as you seem to be agreeing even within your post. It's not as though I said that watching 5 seconds of TV makes 100 pounds of fat suddenly appear on your body. I was very careful to explain that this is one among several reasons for my family and to not be rude about it.

Quote:

Question for all you notvmoms.
you dont even let your little1s watch movies like alice in wonderland or aladin or anything?
It's not a matter of "let" or "forbid", as so many seem to think...we just don't have those kinds of materials in the house. This question always kind of baffles me. I mean do you "forbid" your young child to, say, drive your car?

FWIW, I could see taking DS to see a movie in a theater as a special treat when he is quite a bit older. I just don't see any need to have videos at home.


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## Marisol (Apr 6, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Wholewheat Buns*
question for all you notvmoms.

_you dont even let your little1s watch movies like alice in wonderland or aladin or anything?_
Occasionally, DH will go to Blockbuster and get something "kid-friendly" on DVD and we'll all gather around the computer and watch it. This is very rare -- a treat -- once every month or two maybe. We don't buy the movie and let him watch it over and over again on demand. We do own "Finding Nemo," but it is my emergency movie for those one or two times a year when I'm so sick I can't lift my head to care for DS properly.

_what is the the biggest concern for you about television and children?
the main reason you choose no tv?_
As I explained in a previous post on this thread, the passivity the TV seems to create (both physically and mentally) is the greatest concern for me. It's quite possible TV doesn't hurt the majority of children. The evidence is mixed. But there's no evidence to say that it helps, beyond the anecdotal "my child learned his numbers off Sesame Street at 18 months." That's great, but that supposedly incredible feat can be easily duplicated through parental teaching, books and educational toys and games -- all of which have a long, long history of being positive things. I want my kid exposed to all the best things in life. TV is mediocrity in a box.

_what about music?_
We have no problem with music. Music is art. Music is wonderful. MTV and music are not the same thing. We have a very large collection of music -- "tunes" my DS calls them. He dances and grooves to them. We also listen to the radio when we are in the car.


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## Marisol (Apr 6, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kristine*
I understand that this is a hot button topic, but when children are denied things all it means is they'll be even more curious to try it when they're older and then they'll have no guidance and truly be at the mercy of advertisers. There is this thing called moderation, yet I wonder if people have problems with this in their life.

I'm an adult example of someone who grew up without a TV in the home. My father was an education professor who believed that children who don't have a TV in the home achieve a higher reading level at a faster rate than TV-watching children. I was his "experiment."

I'll admit I did go through a period of time in my late teens when my college roommate's TV was a draw for me, but by that time I was old enough to analyze and change my own behavior and I soon realized that TV was really quite shallow. Sometimes I would laugh at the commercials -- ladies prancing around selling shampoo with their shiny hair blowing in the breeze. How silly! This sort of thing actually persuades people to buy things? :LOL I was at no one's "mercy," needed no "guidance." I was not an innocent babe in the woods, but it seemed to me like the rest of the world might have turned into one while I was busy reading books.


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## AppleOrangePear (Apr 17, 2004)

Kristine let me try to explain myself a little better









There is a difference when a child is naturally ready to learn to read/count then them learning it from a TV.
"Clearly, there is more to reading than meets the eye! Besides the superficial process of decoding words on a page, there is a corresponding inner activity that must be cultivated for true reading to occur.Its called "living into the story/reading comprehension." When a child is living into a story, she forms imaginative inner pictures in response to the words. Having the ability to form mental images, to understand, gives meaning to the process of reading. Without this ability, a child may well be able to decode the words on a page, but he will remain functionally illiterate. "

Of course I dont wanna start an off topic thread on this however i was trying to get my point across by all means i was nt impliing there is an EXACT Age it more has to do with the individual child 'natural' readiness and curiousity from the world around him/her.

As for the tv aspect I would be more happy to exclaim that my DC learned these type of things from Real World situations, his parents and so on not from watching Dora, Blues things of that Nature

Once again everyone does as they wish and we are all writing our opinions however some do show research. I havent seen an research FOR TV however ( someone did ask a few)?

EX: Child at DC ( 17 months) storytime loves watching some tv show ( not sure of the name) and boy do you hear about it from the mom. For example He comes to ST rambling off numbers and such however of course NO comprehnesion whats so ever of it. While he was so called 'mezmorized by the TV i guess he 'memorized'

Over course everything in moderation however we cant watch tv in moderation if we dont have one or most importantly the TIME!

Michele


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## wednesday (Apr 26, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kristine*
I understand that this is a hot button topic, but when children are denied things all it means is they'll be even more curious to try it when they're older and then they'll have no guidance and truly be at the mercy of advertisers. There is this thing called moderation, yet I wonder if people have problems with this in their life.

Would you say this to a vegetarian mama who did not feed her child meat? That she is unwisely setting up her child to have a craving for meat when he is older?

Different families have different values. I don't know why that is so offensive to you.


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## sphinx (Mar 13, 2003)

NO WAY! We have no TV, have not had since I left my parents house, where the frequent buzz drove me insane and sucked me in sometimes to waste hours... There is nothing on TV that could possibly surpass spending time outdoors, doing creative things, playing music, dancing, work around the house, or being with one another. What I also found is without TV my child has always been able to entertain herself just fine even during those stressful times when everyone says it's helpful - after breakfast, before dinner, before bed. Of course there were some struggles when she was a toddler, but I never would have replaced one set of problems with the other set caused by the TV.

Yes, much of the research is biased. And much of it is also indisputable. The research doesn't sway me as much as my own childrens' reactions and those of other children I see around me, to wit,

Dd is 5 now and I still see the same response in her whenever she watches, which she does sparingly [like a carefully selected, original DVD with us twice a month, (rarely disney or "franchised" stuff), a tv show maybe twice a month at someone's house] - she imitates the play for days or weeks, suppressing her own creative voice inside, she pines for things resembling those the actors have or wants to be like them, have their clothing, etc, and in general gets confused about why life isn't like it is in TV Land. (Especially when someone is severely hurt or dies and then comes back.) Most of all, she gets totally hyperactive and jumpy and violent, right after, no matter if it's a nature program or a cartoon. This is without commercials. It makes me feel very uncomfortable.

Frankly, I don't care if TV teaches things. Those things can be learned by LIVING. Please don't take this as judgment of parents or parenting styles if yours includes TV. I don't sit around spouting this POV to everyone (unless they ask!) But the truth is, I am frightened on a more global scale for the future of a TV-possessed culture.

I think I have such a strong feeling about this because I am American and have lived and traveled extensively in other cultures. This whole TV issue, to me, begs a deeper question. From a cultural perspective I have watched the US get sucked deeper and deeper into a vortex of out-of-control, unethical marketing and consumerism aimed at tiny people, idolatry, greed, significant "dumbing down" and loss of creative spark in children and young adults, obesity, depression, more environmental illnesses than you can shake a stick at, a truly disturbing jump in violence, and "social life" has become watching TV or movies together! Remember pajama parties? [My pre-teen niece has "movie parties" because she & her friends don't know what to do together if it doesn't involve a telephone, computer or TV - and she was raised with "moderate" exposure.] I think TV is a major culprit in this.

The concept of "moderation" is somewhat spurious to me. Just because something exists, does it mean we should even accept it into our life-view as a potential actor? Just because coca cola exists, should I let my toddler drink it even sometimes when I know it has no nutritional value? Because fast food places exist, should I consider them part f the restaurant choices I have when it has been proven how unhealthy they are? I know I can get a handgun, should that be part of my range of things to even consider buying? IIt's not against the law to spank my kids, so should it be part of my cache of ideas for how to raise them? I hope this makes sense. I'm certainly not judging anyone, but I am just horrified at what I have seen on a grand scale when I've been in countries where TV does not have the enormous role that it does in the US.

I won't even go into my feelings about its use as a political propaganda tool (and a tool to help divert public attention from things that govt doesn't want you to know) because I've already written too much.

Now, I will seek shelter under my desk.


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## sphinx (Mar 13, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *sphinx*
I'm certainly not judging anyone, but I am just horrified at what I have seen on a grand scale when I've been in countries where TV does not have the enormous role that it does in the US.

What i mean is i am horrified by the US in comparison to these other places which do not have the same rates of violence & other social problems, etc.) !


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## AppleOrangePear (Apr 17, 2004)

SPHINX SPHINX COME OUT from under your desk so I can


















Quote:

There is nothing on TV that could possibly surpass spending time outdoors, doing creative things, playing music, dancing, work around the house, or being with one another










Michele


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## brijenn (Feb 12, 2005)

Yes, I do allow my kids to watch TV. My almost 3 year old quite enjoys it but my 15 month old isn't interested yet. We have a channel where I live called Treehouse that is all pre-school shows. Similiar to PBS but runs 24-7. She watches a bit in the morning and late afternoon. She is also a big Disney fan and watches Disney DVD's. We don't watch "adult" TV with them - she wouldn't let us anyway. If the TV is on she wants to watch her shows!

I too think that in moderation TV is fine. My 3 year old has an excellent imaginiation and I think TV has helped, not hinderd that. She is constantly role playing her favorite Disney princess or whomever. I couldn't imagine her life without TV - she gets very excited about certain characters and loves to interact with them. I don't see a problem with that at all. The channel she watches doesn't have commericals but I am not sure if I would have a problem if they did. Commercialism is part of our society - she will be exposed to it her whole life whether she watches TV or not.

Yes she read books too, but isn't as interested in them as she is in the TV. Quite frankly, either am I and I don't have a problem with that.

Oops, I forgot to add that just because a child watches TV, does not mean they don't play outside, do crafts, read, etc. It's ok for kids to sit and relax and have a bit of "downtime" too.


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## Sasha_girl (Feb 19, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *wednesday*
Would you say this to a vegetarian mama who did not feed her child meat? That she is unwisely setting up her child to have a craving for meat when he is older?

Different families have different values. I don't know why that is so offensive to you.

Well said!


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## kathipaul (Sep 24, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kristine*
What study could link TV alone to obesity?? It simply couldn't! It's what you do or don't do whether in front of the TV or not that is the problem. Sitting in front of the TV eating potato chips and drinking pop will reap different results than a child eating a healthy meal and spending hours outdoors before watching TV, or after for that matter.

I understand that this is a hot button topic, but when children are denied things all it means is they'll be even more curious to try it when they're older and then they'll have no guidance and truly be at the mercy of advertisers. There is this thing called moderation, yet I wonder if people have problems with this in their life.

Kristine is right. TV alone does not cause obesity. Eating too much of the wrong foods and not getting enough exercise causes obesity. I believe that there is nothing wrong with a little tv in one's life as long as it is balanced with arts and crafts, music, literature, nature, good food, exercise, exploration, etc. Moderation is the key. Blaming all the ills of the world on tv is missing the boat.

Let's stop picking on each other for having different points of view in this thread and just concentrate on answering the op's original question. Leave the politics for another forum.


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## AppleOrangePear (Apr 17, 2004)

Imitation is different from pure imagination









Michele


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## Rainbowbird (Jul 26, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *asherah*
If Thomas is used to sell vaccinations.. well, then I will have issues.

:LOL

I agree that some characters promote commercialization/profits. But Thomas doesn't bother me that way. For one thing, he started out as an actual character in a book. And the trains are sooooo much fun for my son to play with. The videos are in real time and very pleasant. I've always been kind of an anglophile anyway...

I think we all just have to pick and choose what feels right for us. Some of us are more moderate about things than others. I don't think no tv vs. some tv makes for a good or bad mother. I think that a child who sat around all day eating chips and getting no attention or exercise, as one PP mentioned, would definitely not be receiving good parenting. But I don't think anyone here is doing that!

My personal philosophy is not to rely on expert opinion totally to make my judgements...and there was some debate over that tv study that questioned whether ADD was more common in kids who watched tv b/c the parents needed to plunk them down and get a break. Chicken vs. egg thing. In other words, was it just an assocation rather than a proven outcome.

Anyway, I feel comfortable with my own decisions regarding this (limited tv exposure, etc.) and I think everyone else is justified in drawing their own conclusions and making their own decisions. The OP wanted feedback from all of us, but that doesn't mean we have to attack each other...


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## Rainbowbird (Jul 26, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ArlyShellandKai*
SPHINX SPHINX COME OUT from under your desk so I can



























Michele

I agree with this. TV is never as important or satisfying as real life, and interacting with TV characters is not a substitute for interacting with real people.

I still feel there is no harm in moderation. It really depends on each child and family. Some kids are perhaps more influenced by having the t.v. on than others. My son, being very active and curious, really doesn't want to sit still that long. He would much rather go chase our poor cat or run and play outside. His wagon, which he can fill with rocks or other treasures, holds far more interest than the tv.

If someone else sees that tv. is causing their child to be more passive, or aggressive, or whatever, why then of course one could see why they were so anti-tv. If you think it is doing something bad to your child, then you have to do what you think is best. But that doesn't mean it is affecting everyone else's children the same way.

Incidentally, I watched a fair amount of tv as a child, learned to read before kindergarten, and was always at the top of my class in reading and language arts.

BUT that is probably because I had parents who also read to me A LOT, and valued books and education, and provided a balance of activities for me and my siblings....


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## TortelliniMama (Mar 11, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ArlyShellandKai*
Imitation is different from pure imagination









That's certainly true, but I would have to offer my experience, as someone who grew up with a lot of TV. I did do a lot of imaginative play around TV shows, but they were just a jumping off point. I played a lot of Dukes of Hazzard, He-Man, and Batman inspired scenarios. I was definitely not just replaying the shows, though. I did the same thing with books. I would create scenarios that used the characters, but they ended up acting in very different ways from the shows/books. And the aspects of the shows/books that resonated with me were generally not the ones that were emphasized on TV or in print. I tended to go for the "what they're doing when they're at home, not out having adventures" aspects. If they had made episodes based on my play, I'm sure the shows would have been cancelled. I just don't think that watching people wash dishes and shop for food is what the target demographic was looking for. :LOL

I'm not sure why I liked using the already created characters. They didn't really bear much resemblance to the originals when I was done with them, but somehow it was what I liked. I also enjoyed the shows, but they never quite measured up to my play.

Just another point of view. I'm definitely not suggesting anyone should have their child watch TV for this reason, just pointing out that you can have true imaginative play based on a TV show. (And, BTW, I didn't *only* play these games. I did a lot of play not based on TV, too. I was a very imaginative kid.)

One more thought: I didn't have a lot of kids in my neighborhood to play with, so I was often playing by myself. Maybe groups of kids are more likely to play something that's more in line with the TV show, since each of them might have particular aspects that they want to be true to, and when you add all those aspects together, it could equal the entire show. Since I was playing alone, I could change or keep whatever I wanted. (I still would have preferred more neighborhood friends, though!







)


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## OTMomma (Aug 12, 2003)

We let our dd watch tv. I limit it to PBS and a few shows from Nick Jr. She gets one show a day, most days. Usually while I'm in the shower (last time I didn't put a show on, she locked herself in the other bathroom!) DD and I have also recently started making fridays movie day. We get a kids video from the library and watch it Friday afternoon as a treat for us both.

That said, I have abused TV with dd at times. There was a period a few weeks ago where dd and I were both eating too much junk and watching too much TV (hours a day). Dd became a very irritable dissagreeable child, and I was very depressed feeling. I then took us both off sugar and TV for a week. We're all doing much better now. And even though I've returned to the above TV schedule, its not an issue.

I think this is something that everyone has to figure out what they are comfortable with. I don't think TV is evil, but I also can respect that some people don't want one.


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## rgarlough (Jul 18, 2002)

Mason can watch a bit of Jo Jo's Circus or the Wiggles in the morning while we get ready for the day. He will passively absorb what's on for about 5-10 minutes and then get up and leave the room.

I've Tivod a few older SS episodes for emergency use as well as a few Wiggles episodes. I do not like new SS and I am DYING for some of the really old, like 25 YO episodes to be available on DVD.

I also saved a few Mr Rogers episodes. He is my FAVORITE and if Mason wanted to, I would let him watch him for HOURS.

The TV is not on at daycare so I don't have to worry about him rotting his brain there.

My youngest sister was basically raised by the TV and movies. She has rotted her mind. She had an imagination as a child that was strictly based on characters she watched on TV and from movies. To this day, she cannot survive without her TV. Its sad. I do not want my son to grow up that way.

We do believe in moderation. We have family movie nights on the Fridays we have dh's kids. We do moderate what the older kids watch (their mom does not...) We all go outside whenever possible. TV doesn't rule our lives. Dh has a TV issue since he's the type that NEEDS to relax by it every night. I don't. And so far, neither does our ds. We'd rather play first than watch TV. That said, we play in the family room which has a TV... So yes ds is absorbing whatever crap dh has on...









Thankfully my rule still stands NO TVS IN THE BEDROOMS.


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## Kristine (Sep 26, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *wednesday*
Would you say this to a vegetarian mama who did not feed her child meat? That she is unwisely setting up her child to have a craving for meat when he is older?

Speaking as a vegetarian mother, that logic is a bit flawed. The reason why I say this is because while we don't feed our child meat, we also don't pretend it doesn't exist. As time progresses, our son will learn where meat comes from, how it is raised in factory-farmed conditions, what is put into the meat, and everything it takes to bring the meat to market. When he is older and is aware of these facts, he may then decide on his own if he wants to partake of it. If he does, that is fine. I will have done my part in teaching him to be aware of his surroundings and to have tools to make decisions. That is my job as his mother.

My point about the television was simply this: most of the posts I see or an either/or type. TV is simply a tool to be used. Demonizing it or excluding it from your home is as irrational as banning hammers because the hammers could potentially be used to break something instead of its appropriate use.


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## Kristine (Sep 26, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *kathipaul*
Kristine is right. TV alone does not cause obesity. Eating too much of the wrong foods and not getting enough exercise causes obesity. I believe that there is nothing wrong with a little tv in one's life as long as it is balanced with arts and crafts, music, literature, nature, good food, exercise, exploration, etc. Moderation is the key. Blaming all the ills of the world on tv is missing the boat.

Let's stop picking on each other for having different points of view in this thread and just concentrate on answering the op's original question. Leave the politics for another forum.

I agree. I'm sorry if I offended anybody and I agree with this post that moderation to all things in life is the key and that is the point I was trying to make.


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## UrbanPlanter (Nov 14, 2003)

No TV here - thanks to The Plug-In Drug.

This includes videos, too, which fall under the same category as "TV" bc they involve staring at the screen. Also no computer time.


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## Ellien C (Aug 19, 2004)

we don't watch much TV - about 2 shows a week. But DD watches them with us if she's up. We don't make a big deal about it. Neither one of us are into childrens videos so we don't watch much children's TV. We watch The Amazing Race and Lost. The occasional Law and Order.

Even though we both work full-time we don't watch it in the morning or evening when making dinner. I find it's much more fun for DD to be right there with me - helping to make the meal, or sitting on my dresser getting into all of my make-up and earrings. Or standing next to the ironing board hissing back at the iron. DH will take her in the shower or take her downstairs and get her breakfast and she helps pack her lunch. She starts the dishwasher, too. When we watch TV it's usually something we do together. Once when we were both sick we popped in the Spiderman movie we had just bought. "I 'piderman!" she kept saying.

To get back to the OP - I'd feel wrong if I plugged her in to the TV so I could get something done. But not because it was TV, but because as a CC mother, I aim to do things WITH my child, not FOR my child. I have an expectation that my DD will help out with the household things - like making dinner and getting herself dressed. She's 2 now and it definitely makes it harder for us in the morning and evening, but you'd be surprised what you can do with a kid. And since I'm away from her all day, I want to spend as much time at home WITH her, not doing things around the house. Since the household stuff still needs doing, she's with us.

PS. My 2 yo has never actually asked for the TV to be turned on. Maybe we watch boring shows to her. But when the shows go to commercial she does ask for the chacters to come back. DH and I are usually discussing some aspect of the show during the commercials. We're a FAMILY of talkers LOL!


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## sphinx (Mar 13, 2003)

I would like to clarify what I meant about "moderation". I too strive for moderation in most areas of my life (except chocolate!). But none can deny that TV is omnipresent in US culture - the centripetal force is such that you CANNOT escape its influence to one degree or another. To me, having to buy my kid socks with Dora on them and underwear with Power Puff Girls on it because I can't find any in the shop that are unadorned (yes this has happened to me), well, that is enough TV already in our lives!

Or for instance when we were living in the States 2 years ago, dd wanted to be a mermaid for Halloween. We set about making a gorgeous outfit. One day she comes home saying "I want to be The Little Mermaid" which she saw on several backpacks around town & her cousin told her about the movie. Suddenly my original colorful creation for my dd, which she had conceptualized, was no longer a "proper" mermaid for her because she was so influenced by the sheer quantity and marketability of this other mermaid image that was everywhere. Someone gave her the image and it blocked out her own original concept. So for me, again, that's enough TV. We don't even have to see the movie for the characters to invade our lives! Simply stepping into the culture guarantees being exposed to TV. So only going that far is my way of manifesting TV moderation for my family.

I think it's okay once in a while to borrow a character, but the child's imagination is so rich (as one PP said) that in my mind there is just no need - why bother with extra stimulation by the TV, when kids come up with their own fantastic ideas from life?

I also watched a modicum of TV growing up, but in those days it wasn't what it is now, with dozens of channels with all-day programming geared toward marketing to little children from birth. Here in Czechy there is one kids' TV show per day. It runs from 7:00-7:10pm, yes, TEN minutes! The story is creative and unique, not syndicated characters but new ones for each week, and after that the host comes on and tells all the children goodnight. They might have another show on Sunday morning and a special once a week. This represents to me a reasonable "moderation" in TV for children. They are well thought out, age-appropriate and have no commercialism attached to them. We still don't have a TV, but dd watches the evening show when she sleeps at her grandma's.

I certainly didn't mean any offense with my post, I just have a real concern about TV's cultural impact, and it's not a judgment of other mamas but a worry about our children. Obviously, I believe late exposure is far preferable to starting kids early on TV.

Choosing not to have a TV in our family's life feels neither extremist nor irrational, just as we are effortlessly vegetarian or I don't own any high heels. Just the way things work for us.

I also am enjoying reading this debate, I didn't catch any overt nastiness or anything and the OP did ask for reasons why, so she's getting plenty pro and con and in between!

Peace all.


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## Marisol (Apr 6, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kristine*
Speaking as a vegetarian mother, that logic is a bit flawed. The reason why I say this is because while we don't feed our child meat, we also don't pretend it doesn't exist.

I don't recall anyone saying that they completely hide the existance of TV from their children. If a TV was blaring in a public place like an airport or doctor's office, I wouldn't cover my DS's eyes or walk out of the room with him. That's just silly. A couple minutes of TV-watching while we wait isn't going to warp my child for life. But that doesn't mean I need to allow one into my home, or that I am any less firm in my belief that it is the modern opiate of the masses.

There's a lot of things parents choose not to allow into their homes because they think the negatives outweigh the positives. I grew up in an alcohol-free home, for example, but no one tried to deny it existed and I didn't turn out to be a drunk just because I hadn't been hardened to it at a tender age. Toy guns are another issue that comes up here at MDC a lot. Many parents simply refuse to allow them in their homes, and I don't see how not having a TV in the home is any different of a choice than that.


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## SpiralChrissy (Apr 5, 2004)

My DS watches some t.v. He's 20months. He rarely sits and watches. He's always puttering around. We watch NOggin sometimes but mostly he sees videos like Bob the Builder, BAby E., etc. I try to screen shows/videos first. If there's a message or some redeeming value, I'm o.k. with that. We keep our t.v.s out of the main areas of our house. If DS sees a t.v., he'll probably want to watch it so this helps us a lot.
If I'm sick or having a really rough day, we might hand with the t.v. a bit more. And that's far better than me losing it in frustration








When DS is watching, I'm usually e-mailing so it's a nice break for me too.
We don't use t.v. too much, though. It's more a little here and there.
I don't watch much t.v. myself. I'm down to 1 show a week. DH watches a lot of Comedy Central and the History Channel, but he does that on his own out of DS's way.
I'll have to read The Plug in Drug and get rid of t.v. all together, huh?


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## Sasha_girl (Feb 19, 2003)

This thread finally prompted me to order _The Plug-In Drug_ from Amazon.com. I've wanted to read it for awhile now anyway. While my book-buying budget is used up for the month I was able to buy a used copy of the original version for $.75.


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## AppleOrangePear (Apr 17, 2004)

Sasha our local library has the 2002 vs you may want to check yours too.

Michele


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## outnumbered (Apr 17, 2005)

I have two older kids (ages 3 and 5) so when they watch, my 1-year-old watches. But she isn't terribly interested in it either and will only watch for a minute or two and then go off and do something else. I think some TV is OK but it's just so easy to get out of hand with it. I'm glad the weather is warming up so that the kids can spend more time outside instead. It can be hard (at least, it is for me) to be vigilant about turning the TV off.


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

OK, I started reading all the responses and realized this is turning into the whole "us verses them" thing. So... I am just posting my answers. My kids don't watch TV or videos with any sort of regularity. We try to do family movie night every few weeks- usually a short kid flick- and the older two have been to the movies once. If we are somewhere with a TV on, we don't rush out, though, unless it is something I feel is inappropriate. No Disney movies here yet (Michael watched The Lion King with me as a treat when he was 5), no trademarked 1/2 hour long commercials (Thomas, Dora, etc), no supposedly educational shows- there is nothing they can learn from television that they cannot learn "better" in real life. As far as TV giving them experiences they can't have in real life- so what- they are 1,3, and 6. They are still trying to figure out the immediate world around them. The whole moderation arguement could be made for anything- you have to let them drink a little booze while they are young, or they will rebel and binge. If I deny them crack, they may go out and seek it when they are older. I know these are ridiculous examples, but, frankly, the argument itself seems a little crazy.
My personal issues with TV are
1. Passivity. With obesity running rampant, the last thing kids need is to be sitting around for more hours every day
2. Lack of imagination. Even if it is "interactive" TV, the child is still playing what the little furry character on TV says to play.
3. Commercialism. If you can buy a toy that goes with the show, it's commercial.
4. Developmentally inappropriate. Children learn by actively exploring their environments.
5. Values. There is very little on TV that reflects the values I want to pass on to my children.
6. Brain waves and TV pictures. I know research can be skewed, but I believe the research that says TV is bad for little ones' brains.
7. Time Waster. There's too much in life for toddler's to do without spending time in front of a TV.
8. Not really relaxing. I want my children to learn relaxation skills that will take them through life, not how to escape into television.
9. Breaks. I just find other ways of getting breaks.


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## AppleOrangePear (Apr 17, 2004)

Annette Thanks for that Post! I don' t think any of us could have said it better!









Michele


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## Storm Bride (Mar 2, 2005)

My daughter watches Saturday morning cartoons with her big brother. But, that's very intermittent. She'll eat breakfast, go watch TV with Kelly for a while, come ask us to read her Madeline 10 times, go watch TV for a while, etc., etc. I've checked in on them, and she's usually more involved with interacting with her brother than actually watching the programs.

My parents (we're staying with them while waiting for our immigration papers to clear) watch Wheel of Fortuen (UGH - I can't stand it), Jeopardy and Law & Order almost every weeknight. Emma likes to hang out in the den with them while they watch their shows. She dances to the intro music to Law & Order, but doesn't really pay attention to the show. (She'll snuggle up on the couch and play with her dolls or whatever). I think she just likes to spend time with grandma & grandpa - they both work right to supper time every day.

Other than that, she watches very little tv. Every month or so the family will watch a DVD on Friday night, but she's usually in bed for most of that. And, she'll sometimes turn on the tv - if it's a kid show (she loves Dora and likes Sesame Street), she'll sometimes watch it for a few minutes. But, tv doesn't generally hold her attention. I think she mostly enjoys seeing something happen when she pushes the button - she also loves light switches.









My dh and I almost never watch tv (well...I'm a sci-fi junkie, and if I'm really tired or not feeling well, I'll sometimes watch several hours of "Space"). It's just not a big part of our lives around here. My ex was a tv addict, and I just got tired of having the noise all the time. I don't think I'd ever go back to watching a lot of tv...it just sucks up too much of my time.


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## puddleduck (Jan 3, 2005)

We have been TV free for about 6 months now - mainly because i was spending too much time watching rubbish and not paying attention to my son. It feels liberating not to get sucked in.

My ds has seen tv, round friends houses but he doesn't watch it.
I was brought up with unlimited tv, i sat with my nose pressed up to the tv screen for many hours of the day. I don't know if its linked but i have a really short attention span and i'm the only member of my family to need glasses.

But, dh & myself do watch dvd's in the evening & when ds is 2+ i guess i wouldn't mind him watching a little - like 1, 1/2 hour dvd a week.

thats my 2 pence worth


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## witchbaby (Apr 17, 2003)

k gets to watch t.v. i don't limit it, but it's not on all the time, either. she loves sesame street (so do i!) and barney (ugh) and those come right after one another in the morning. then, usually, the t.v. is off, if we're even home. i enjoy the ellen degeneres show in the afternoon and k likes the music: she dances with ellen, then wanders off to play while i fold laundry or something on the couch. in the evening, once the boy is home, the simpsons and such is on, but she pays little attention. she rarely sits and vegges in front of the television: she watches what interests her, then moves on. she loves to read and color and build, and her room is chock full of objects to do just that. our apartment is very small, so i can see her from virtually any room. we spend hours a day with books (our whole family are book junkies) and she loves to be read to and pretend to read herself.
on the subject of learning, i do believe she learns a certain amount from the television, but it's usually just a jumping off point to us talking about it and discovering more or telling stories. she'll see an animal she's never seen before on sesame street, for example, ask me what it is and i'll tell her, make its noise and what it does. she recently learned to count to 10 because of a game we've made of snapping up her pajamas. she knows well over 200 words and learns more every day, simply from being around a family who just doens't shut up!
i enjoy television, but i don't let it rule my life or my daughter's.


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## Cian'sMama (Jan 28, 2005)

I must agree with what others have said about commercials. They can be SCARY even for me!!! I can't imagine how horror film trailers, or a CSI/AMW/Cops commercial would appear to a young child. I don't want to imagine it, actually.
So, (ds is 1) we limit TV to only pbs and dvd's-but no more than ONE hour a WEEK. I think that "regular" tv should not be seen by children under age 2. Then, some cartoons are fine.


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## meco (Mar 1, 2004)

If people cannot find clothes without characters, talk to me







I have an entire no character wardrobe for my son!! Under the Nile makes plain underwear. So does Petit Bateau. Luxe Baby is a WAHM and she does beautiful hand painted t shirts, so does Cotton Pickin' Creations. And the prices cannot be beat.

I get my son's socks in Canada actually :LOL They are much softer and he loves them. Best yet they are all solid colors or stripes. I do have a few sets with monkeys and flowers as well. I think they are Winkies brand. I could be way off. They also sell solid training underpants. I also find solids at TJ Maxx and Marshall's.

Of course we do not have a Target or Wal Mart so those are not an option, and I find most other places do not sell commercialized character clothing. Also eBay for Under the Nile and Petit Bateau.









Hope this helps!


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## streetkitty (Feb 6, 2005)

dd is 20 months and has the tv on in the morning although really only watches "Dora" which she loves! We only let her watch NOGGIN- no commercials and she doesn't pay much attention to any other show but Dora. She does love certain DVDs- Signing Time, Baby Einstein (World Animals, Neighborhood Animals, Water) but still tends to watch for a minute and continues playing with her toys. (With the exception of Signing Time since she knows every DVD by memory).

I am on the fence- good/bad? I think everything in moderation. I do make sure that she isn't watching a ton of TV but some days she watches 3 signing time DVDs and 3 Dora episodes (spaced throughout the day) and other days she doesn't watch TV at all. She has learned 100's of signs from Signing Time and loves to play with her Dora figures like she sees on the show so I cannot buy into the idea that watching some tv is bad for her.


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## AppleOrangePear (Apr 17, 2004)

WOW! Meco i didnt even think about that once DS is in underwear it will probably be difficult to find ones with out characters on them..... Hmmm thanks for the links too.

DS is character free clothes and actually character free toys. I love that he is able to just plain ole pretend with his basic toys and not imitate/copy what he would have seen on tv..however i looove when he imitates DH and I cooking and cleaning... Hes so full of energy now i cant imagine how much energy he would have if he were to watch tv









I looooove the plug in drug however im not even finished. I checked out the 2002 Copy..

Michele


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## UrbanPlanter (Nov 14, 2003)

meco we have Kmart and they sell plain tightie-whities (Hanes or FotL) for toddlers as well as cotton training pants that just have little blue dogs on them (not Blues Clues or whatever - just cute, anonymous







:s







)


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## treemom2 (Oct 1, 2003)

We don't have cable, but we do have a tv. DD watches some videos (mainly with DH). I have had the TV for sale in a local paper for a while now, but I guess most people want to buy a new one. I've talked to DH about donating it to his school (he's a teacher) and he said he would discuss it with the school secretary. I, honestly, would much rather listen to the radio or DH play guitar and dance with my children or read a book than have the tv on!! I'm also going to go and check out that book on Amazon--thanks for recommending it.


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## meco (Mar 1, 2004)

You should know by now I have animal issues







: :LOL And issues with prints. I need solids or small central designs in general.

Actually my son does not like the elastic band on his waist. I have never been able to use fold over elastic or elastic of any sort. Under the Nile and Petit Bateau ones do not have exposed elastic.

Not to mention, I am afraid of K Mart







: :LOL

I have issues ok


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

Do I have issues if I think your issues make you sound like a pretty cool person?


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## hipumpkins (Jul 25, 2003)

Here's a strage twist. We don't do TV. Videoes on a very rare (Like maybe once a month The samewinnie the pooh video). However, we do do characters...commercialzed and Disneyfied. I love mostof the Disney characters...Winnie the pooh and stuff. DD doesn't have too many outfits with them on b/c I think they look more like costumes than clothes.She does however have tons of Disney stuffed animlas (my dad works at the park) and loves them. We read some boks that have Disney characters. Her imagiangion is great. Why just the other day Donald Duck was "Wisey the OWl" from a book we read. Also funny is that bc she never saw any of the movies she doesn't know who is a "bad" guy and when we went to Disney world she wanted a "Scar" doll most of all. So there was my sweet toe head with evil Scar in her hand. :LOL

We stopped TV almost as soon as we started it b/c DD got really crazy about Ernie from Sesame street. So I stopped that almost almost a year ago and she hasn't watched since.
I also read "The plugin drug" which has kept me viligant even through the rougher winter months.


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## UrbanPlanter (Nov 14, 2003)

meco, how is kmart different from target or walmart?







(which you mentioned in your pp so I thought you would be ok with kmart, which does scare me, too







: )

I forgot about your issues, sorry









as for undies, ds likes to wear what his papa wears: hanes t-shirt and briefs. they are so cute when they are both bouncing around in the apt. in their tighty-whities: papa and mini-me(papa) :LOL


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## OnTheFence (Feb 15, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Wholewheat Buns*
yes? no?
if yes, what kinds of things do they watch?
what things do you restrict?
and how much do they watch a day?

my son loves television and i find it very useful when i need to prepare meals or do something like get dressed in the morning.
but
i have major anxiety about it.
i dont want him to love it the way he does.
if i allowed it he would turn it on first thing in the morning and probably not shut it off.
of course that never happens but i still get anxiety about him watching it.

Yes, I do let my toddler watch TV. I also have a preschooler. TV is pretty limited in this house for kiddos unless we are sick or it rains. I let them watch stuff on PBS, Blues Clues, Bear In The Big Blue House, Wiggles, and some Disney movies. It just depends on the day what my kids like. Right now they are both into Blues Clues. My daughter likes to watch Disney Movies (she is 8) but really doesnt watch a lot of TV.


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## mightymoo (Dec 6, 2003)

My toddler as a rule does not watch television. Our general rule is that the TV is off while she is awake. This is great for limiting ourselves as well - and I can tell you when you step back and look at it - it really affects your own relationships / time, etc significantly. Not to say I don't like it and don't want to give it up entirely.









She does see a little television though - Daddy watches some sports and so she'll watch that with Daddy. Right now she thinks that's pretty much what the tv shows 'the game'. When Grandparents are around they sometimes turn it on, but I think they are trying to be more respectful of our wishes and keep it off, though we've never said anything. (They live far away and visit very rarely so its not worth making a big deal about). When we are over others houses I also don't make a big deal.

Eventually I'm sure we will find a balance, I don't intend to be hardline no television, but I do intend to restrict it. I like the rules like no tv on weekdays and for every 5 minutes of tv you need to spend 5 minutes outside - naturally you don't remind them when the 5 minutes outside or playing, etc are up and they get caught up in that.


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## ladylee (Nov 20, 2001)

My 19th mo doesn't watch television. My five year old watches sometimes-but the youngest isn't interested enough to stop playing and watch. Although the Backyardigans has been catching her attention briefly. My older daughter didn't start really watching television until she was three. And very limited things-Wiggles on video, Kipper, Teletubbies, and the Baby Einstein videos before Disney purchased Baby Einstein.


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## hottmama (Dec 27, 2004)

My son is 27 mos. and I planned to follow the AAP guideline of no tv (including videos, which I consider TV) for the first 2 years. When he turned 2 I experimented with about 3 minutes of Dora and he was totally sucked in, passive, wouldn't even answer when I called his name. So I turned it off and vowed to wait until he was more ready. We don't even own a TV, we were at my mom's that day. We watch dvds occasionally on my laptop (by me I mean us grownups!) Two days ago I let him watch TV for the first time. I had a migraine and felt like crap (pregnant) and my partner and a friend and I were watching Star Wars. It was past Jules' bedtime so I figured once we turned the light off, he would just nurse to sleep, but after nursing for a few minutes he sat up and watched 10-15 minutes of the movie (before falling asleep on the boob). He loved the "airplanes" (spaceships) and the "big fishy eating airplane". He also made a lot of "boom" "crash" etc. sound effects along with the movie. So I think he is a lot more ready than he was 3 months ago. I think 15 minutes a day is plenty for a 2 year old, and every day seems like too much. I am always going to be strongly opposed to children under two watching any TV at all.

I don't understand the everything in moderation argument either. I'm not gonna give my kid junk food or candy (he's a vegan, who rarely eats anything with added sugar), beer, cigarettes, let him hit me occasionally, or watch horror movies as a treat. Some things are not for 2 year olds. He knows that. TV is one such thing, and it's not going to back fire, hopefully, and he won't be a couch potato as soon as he's old enough to make his own choices. Nor will he be a heroin addict, because I don't let him do that, either. (Not that I am comparing TV moms to people who would give a 2 yr old heroin, of course).


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## mightymoo (Dec 6, 2003)

I posted earlier about how we don't let our 2 year old watch tv, just an occaisional sports game with daddy.

Well, the other day I was totally exhausted (I'm 8 months pregnant) and I thought I'll see if one of the nature shows is on the HD channel and DD and I can watch it together for a few minutes so I can have a break. I turned it on and the IMAX film about beavers was on - so I thought perfect she loves animals and beavers aren't viscous carnivores or anything scary like that - besides I had seen it before.

Well, she loved watching the beavers for a couple minutes, then they started gnawing down trees - she got really agitated about the trees falling and told me she was scared. It really opened my eyes as to what could be considered scary/violent on TV and that she just isn't ready to understand these things - we turned it off immediately!


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## edamommy (Apr 6, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mightymoo*
I posted earlier about how we don't let our 2 year old watch tv, just an occaisional sports game with daddy.

Well, the other day I was totally exhausted (I'm 8 months pregnant) and I thought I'll see if one of the nature shows is on the HD channel and DD and I can watch it together for a few minutes so I can have a break. I turned it on and the IMAX film about beavers was on - so I thought perfect she loves animals and beavers aren't viscous carnivores or anything scary like that - besides I had seen it before.

Well, she loved watching the beavers for a couple minutes, then they started gnawing down trees - she got really agitated about the trees falling and told me she was scared. It really opened my eyes as to what could be considered scary/violent on TV and that she just isn't ready to understand these things - we turned it off immediately!

hmmm I would have just explained to my ds (who is also 2) what the beavers were doing. Maybe done a little "beaver play" for laughs... and called it "lesson learned"! A beaver chewing down a tree shouldn't be thought of as "violence"...







:


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## Mizelenius (Mar 22, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mightymoo*
Well, the other day I was totally exhausted (I'm 8 months pregnant) and I thought I'll see if one of the nature shows is on the HD channel and DD and I can watch it together for a few minutes so I can have a break. I turned it on and the IMAX film about beavers was on - so I thought perfect she loves animals and beavers aren't viscous carnivores or anything scary like that - besides I had seen it before.

My DD LOVES the Beavers documentary, as do I!

Anyway, my DD is (IMO) very sensitive to scary things, which I think is really good. To me, it means she isn't desensitized. DH worries that we've just been sheltering her, and our family tells us we should let her watch scary things so that she isn't afraid.







However, I think it's amazing that DD is in touch with her feelings to know that she's scared and is able to express it. Plus, I always say, "What's the rush? Those shows/movies will be around forever. She's THREE."


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## Still_Snarky (Dec 23, 2004)

The only show Parker can/will watch for more than a minute is American Idol. She'd much prefer we have the stereo on so she can dance dance dance (which is why she likes AI-plus she likes to clap with the audience). We try to reserve TV for when she's napping.


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## mommyofshmoo (Oct 25, 2004)

I haven't read all the replies, but just thought I'd throw in my vote.

Tv? Yes.

How much? Usually too much, but some days not much at all.

What? Dora the Explorer, Blues Clues regularly. Various DVD's and movies at random intervals or when travelling.

Limits? South Park.

Guilt level- pretty low.


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## bec (Dec 13, 2002)

I won't get into the drama, but want to remind everyone that there are many, many great ways to raise kids. Some of those ways include tv. Let's be a little gentler with each other.









To answer the OP:

We used to do broadcast (and satellite) tv. And a lot of it. I was pregnant with my second and exhausted. Then, I had a new baby, and was exhausted. Then I was exclusively pumping, and exhausted. Around midsummer last year, I was fed up with it. This happened when there was a constant tantrum to watch tv, instead of going outside to play with friends. I had enough. I turned it off. We didn't watch anything for 3 months. We cancelled our satellite because we weren't watching it at all, and it was a waste of $40 a month. We do have the occasional video. Usually either the Wiggles, Hans Christian Anderson, Mary Poppins, or a few Disney movies. This is a rare thing. Like, maybe once a month or so. I did relent when she was very sick and let her have a couple of videos in a row.

Immediately, I noticed an improvement in my older daughter's eating, sleeping, imagination, language, etc. It was remarkable. It's been good for me too. I'm less likely to plop down and watch something stupid in the evening, just because I can't think of anything better to do.

My 16 month old could really care less about tv, and usually doesn't pay attention on the rare occasions that DD1 is watching a video.

The funny thing is, I thought I would get less done, because I didn't have tv to use as a distraction. That was true in the beginning, but, I actually get more done now, because they become more engrossed in their imaginative play then they ever did with the tv.

We do have music on most of the day. Sometimes it's children's music, and sometimes not. There's only so much Wiggles, Laurie Berkner, etc. that I can take! :LOL But I usually have a wide variety on. There's usually some jazz, some classical, some rock, etc. I love watching them dance, move and sing to the songs!

Anyway, that's my experience.

Bec


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## kater07 (Jan 6, 2002)

Yes, my DS (2.5yrs) watches TV every day. He adores Dora, Blues Clues and Thomas the Tank. There are also some movies he loves.

He watches 3 or 4 episodes a day spread out between playing outside, playing with trains, eating. It's his cool down period, and quite frankly I need it! Reading books with him is NOT relaxing. I need to be able to tend to baby, go pee, eat my own lunch, work on my business stuff, etc without him bouncing off the walls. I turn on an episode get stuff done in that 15-20 mins and then we start playing again.

I am picky about what he watches, but I couldn't tell you what he's not allowed to watch b/c we TIVO everything he's allowed to watch, so I don't know what else is really on.

HTH


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## Arien (Sep 20, 2004)

We purposely don't have cable. So all TV programs are out unless they're on video.

I let my son watch the animated Beatrix POtter cartoons which are very charming. Also I have the wind in the willows stop motion animated series on video, pingu, some bob the builder, some barney, unfortunately I have an episode of angelina ballerina (which I loathe because she is such a nasty, ornery little character.), I ususally let him pick and limit his time in front of the tv to be after he's had a very busy & active day.

But honestly, I'd love to just throw out the television altogether, to reduce his interaction with it completely. But I myself like to watch movies when he's asleep..so I'm kind of in a bind.

The Tv is in our bedroom and not in the livingroom or dining areas of the house which I like as well.


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## FireWithin (Apr 29, 2004)

My DS watches about 3-4 hours of tv (PBS) a week (unless we are having a bad week). oops if you don't include Friday night RedSox.
Oh I forgot to add that we often watch Nature on Sunday nights together also.

Ihave seen no negative effects with watching tv. He plays amazing well for his age ( something I really notices when seeing him at a 2 year old b-day party today). The play does not appear to be influenced by tv characters. He is very social, appropriate, intelligent and a joy.

When we are having what I call a bad week, I tend to use it when I feel like I'm at the end of my rope. I would rather distract him with Sesame street than yell at him. This is has to do with my problems and not him.

I saw one research study referenced in pp which came about approx a year ago, from what I can remember is that it was debunked. It was the one about toddlers watching tv and seeing a correlation to ADD in older kids. Let's see if I can remember why. . .shoot I can't I will do some research and try to post more.


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## Arien (Sep 20, 2004)

I think TV is okay. I usually watch it with him and talk about it as we watch. The problem arises when they do nothing but watch TV, no physical activity, no other kinds of playing. My son is a very active little boy and we spend lots of time playing outdoors....also using the TV as a babysitter isn;t great either, but sometimes it's the only time I can do dishes.

It's a tough one.


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## RedWine (Sep 26, 2003)

I'm another mama who is reading "The Plug-In Drug" by Marie Winn and as a consequence would like to throw our TV out the window.

Dd (28 months) may watch one half-hour Signing Time video every other day. That's it. When she's older, we will revisit the issue, perhaps allowing 30 minutes of TV a day or every other day. I don't watch TV at all, my husband catches CNN every morning before going to work.


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## dlchris (Feb 28, 2005)

I don't turn on the TV at all when my 17 month DS is around (which is...always). My husband once in a while watches the news/sports when he's in the room, but DS really doesn't pay much attention to it. He's never seen any children's programming or anything that might grab his attention more, like a cartoon. DS is active but temperamentally pretty easy (so far) so I haven't felt a desparate need to distract him. I can't promise what I would do when/if I'm pregnant or have another child and I needed a few minutes peace. I think a thoughtful parent can use TV/videos thoughtfully.

For myself, after so long with so little TV, I am sort of appalled now when I see it.... We don't have cable but DH and I can and do watch occasional movies.

I agree with pp about not having the TV in the common areas (let alone the kid's bedroom). I also agree with having no hardline about it, but hope that my son will learn by example that we do other things most of the time.


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## Sofiesmom (Apr 17, 2005)

I let Sofie watch it whenever she wants to. Its mostly like Blues Clues, Scooby Doo, Barney, shows like that. In the summer, we are out a lot so she doesnt watch it as much then. But it is useful if I need to get something done and I need to distract her. She colors a lot too.


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

Your two-year-old has unlimited access to the television? How much does she watch in a day?


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## Sofiesmom (Apr 17, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *annettemarie*
Your two-year-old has unlimited access to the television? How much does she watch in a day?

I assuming you are asking me this and if I am wrong, I apologize. Sofia is in daycare 5 days a week. I work full time. I dont think she watches much tv at her babysitters house. I would say she watches maybe 2 hours a day on weekends. She would rather be outside, so that is why I am glad it is getting nicer out. I try and play with her here but its so hard because I am in an apartment and dont have a lot of room. She has got a zillion toys and she gets bored with them so easiley.


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

Got it- thanks.


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## Sofiesmom (Apr 17, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *annettemarie*
Got it- thanks.

If you have any suggestions on how I could entertain her so she isnt bored, I would love to hear them! I am always open to that.


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## Rainbowbird (Jul 26, 2004)

I am one of those all things in moderation people, hoping we cut back on the tv even more this summer when it's nice, but this past week when my poor DS was hospitalized on iv fluids, that tv in the room was a Godsend...of course i read to him, and cuddled him, etc. but there were times when seeing something like Dragon Tales made him so happy...this poor child was flat on his back for 3 days, no energy to even try to climb out of his hospital bed. He couldn't play, he couldn't even sit up to do a puzzle until Sat. I loved it when he smiled and it was very hard to get him to do so. So I have to say, I was glad there was a tv there!

I agree with all the comments about how inappropriate some tv can be. Even commericials during the day! It's crazy. I screen carefully (no pun intended!)


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## amj1 (Jul 8, 2003)

In our family we consider a little T.V. okay. We will watch shows with our dd and as long as there are NO commercials. I don't feel that the content of some educational shows is a problem, its the commercials that cause significant brainwashing to occur. We watch treehouse tv which does not show commercials. I know that the fews minutes when she is feeling tired o rcranky and catching a bit of t.v. while I fix a quick meal has not been damaging in anyway. It is about moderation and not letting a t.v. become a replacement for parental interaction. She still prefers books and trips to the library anyday


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## mariamaroo (Aug 15, 2004)

We don't have tv. I have a small set which is covered by a cloth in the living room in case I can ever stay awake long enough to watch a movie after dd is asleep, but that rarely happens. I believe tv is addictive and harmful, and I believe that mostly because I know how I react when I have it... I watch a little, then more, then I'm spending hours in front of it without knowing where the time went.

I'm a single mom and my only child care person is a big tv addict, and has started to watch tv with my dd. They've watched Dora and Lassie, and I think some other cartoons. I think she doesn't tell me everything they watch because she knows I don't approve of it. (She would also be giving my 18 month old sugar all day if I wasn't adamant about it.)

I've been having lots of anxiety lately about what to do about this problem. I don't have any other child care options at this point, and this person is a friend, and takes care of dd for free, and they really love each other. So it's a pretty nice situation except that my friend does NOT support my parenting choices and makes me feel like a nut and a fanatic about them. Rather than cause friction I've been keeping my mouth shut, but I'm not comfortable with what happens when dd is there, so I'm going to have to do something soon. Argh!


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## FireWithin (Apr 29, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *annettemarie*
Your two-year-old has unlimited access to the television? How much does she watch in a day?


I know this question wasn't directed at me, but my 2 year old mostly has unlimited access to tv, although I turn it off on occassion after a program is over. If he fusses when I turn it off (which is very rare) I usually say something like "oh I thought you were done, do you really want to watch this?"

He watches around 3-4 hours of tv a week (not including 1 baseball game on Friday nights and Nature a couple times a month)

He self-regulates fairly well.


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## tragenmama (Apr 26, 2005)

Hi all,

We don't have a television in the house so none of us actually watch any tv at all. We haven't had a tv for many years, probably over 10 yrs so we don't really miss it.

Our daughter (18 month old) enjoys spending time with us and we read lots of books to her, sing and dance with her. Both my husband and I play musical instruments (we are NOT professional musicians) so on some nights, we give her a little concerts.

When my spouse and I are in the kitchen preparing meals or cleaning up, she either plays with her toys or she "helps' us. We don't think that it is necessary to have a tv to use as a distraction because there are planty of things around the house that attracts a toddler!

As for keeping up with the news, well, we read the news on the internet and the newspaper.

Don't get me wrong, we are not anti-television or anything. We made the decision to be a television-free house and we are happy with our decision. (It probably helps that my husband is not really a sports fan either!)

Just my 2 cents,

hy


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## tinaq (Aug 26, 2002)

subscribing


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## AppleOrangePear (Apr 17, 2004)

```
She has got a zillion toys and she gets bored with them so easiley.
```
Sofia's mom: One suggestion I would like to share is you could go through ALL her toys and organize:

donate ones she is not interested in and put some away so you can rotate them so she doesnt get bored and most of all she could be Overstimulated by all of them. Hope that helps.
Michele


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## cks321 (Apr 26, 2005)

My daughter doesn't watch tv unless i need a break or me and her daddy need some much needed "alone" time. And then she only watches what I say she can depending on how much time I need. Usually some type of educational show like Sesame Street. But she is really into the Secret of Nimh which was one of my favs growing up and Rainbow Brite (which also makes me smile) Sometimes she'll go days without watching anything, especially since it's getting warmer and she plays outside all day. But when she's sick or I'm sick I usually break the rules and have a snuggle day on the couch with her.


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## chefkath (Jan 24, 2003)

Our kids don't watch any TV. When DD was really little I watched Sesame Street with her a couple of times - but I thought it was lame, and she was completely bored by it after about 5 minutes, so that was that. We do have a TV stashed away in case of "emergency" (whatever that might be! I think we're just too lazy to get rid of it) - but we haven't turned it on in over 2 years. I can't imagine ever wanting to watch TV with the kids - there are a million more fun and interesting things we could be doing instead.


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## katallen (Jan 4, 2005)

My dd's grandparents gave her a tv a little while back and I let her watch 15 to 30 minutes a week of either Thomas or Elmo DVD. Her mood gets really negative if she watches anymore than that. If she is being watched by her other set of grandparents she may watch a little more with them. I have tried letting her watch some other DVDs, but she is used to books and doesn't understand the concept of the people moving around and her not being able to see her favorite characters the whole time. She has huge melt downs because of this so I don't let her watch anything else.


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## Sylith (Apr 15, 2002)

My son, about 2.5 years old, watches between 20 minutes to an hour of a video or television most days. DH is gone 12 hours a day, M-F, and I have no backup childcare or anything like that -- it's basically all me, all the time. Added to this, DS only sleeps about 9-10 hours at night, usually waking at least twice to nurse, and takes about a half hour nap. I *need* some time, yk?

Sure, it's a rationalization, but I do think a half-hour of screen times is likely to be less damaging for him than a frazzled, short-tempered mommy.


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## janerose (May 9, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Sylith*
My son, about 2.5 years old, watches between 20 minutes to an hour of a video or television most days. DH is gone 12 hours a day, M-F, and I have no backup childcare or anything like that -- it's basically all me, all the time. Added to this, DS only sleeps about 9-10 hours at night, usually waking at least twice to nurse, and takes about a half hour nap. I *need* some time, yk?

Sure, it's a rationalization, but I do think a half-hour of screen times is likely to be less damaging for him than a frazzled, short-tempered mommy.









:


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## kyartz (Jun 17, 2004)

Nope. The most TV DD (now 17 months) watches is if she catches a bit of DH's dirtbike racing while he irons (without sound, thanks to his handy-dandy earphone headset that DD knows is "Daddy's").

I truly believe that no TV is better for DD's development - mind, imagination, soul, whatever. Thus far we've been able to manage without it and I hope that it continues.

Kristen


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## allbrightmama (Aug 8, 2004)

I am one of those freaks who thinks her child is better off without TV. My 2 yr old is the only one I know IRL who doesn't watch. He has seen some TV in his little lifetime but it probably adds up to about 60 seconds a week. I was given some videos that I kept "just in case" but I have promised them to a friend because I realized the day I will "need" them will never come. Some days I don't get a shower. Some days we have yogurt for dinner because cooking just isn't an option. I can live with that. What I can't live with is using something I believe to have very real and negative effects as a babysitter.

I worked with young children for years before I became a mother. All of them were TV watchers. Some of them experienced small amounts of age appropriate TV with very minor ill effects. Others experienced small amounts of age appropriate TV with pretty major ill effects. Their watching patterns all started out pretty much the same but for some kids watching TV, videos or DVDs gradually became problematic. I don't know how my son will handle TV viewing. I am not about to find out the hard way.

We all must make decisions about what is best for our children in our individual circumstances. We won't know the effects of many of those decisions for many years to come. Am I "denying" my child needlessly? Maybe. That is the decision I have made. It is a decision I can live with.


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## laralou (Nov 27, 2001)

Ours have watched but right now we are doing our best to eliminate as much watching as possible. Which means no children's tv shows at all and as few adult shows as I can negotiate with dh.


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## PuppyFluffer (Mar 18, 2002)

We don't own a tv so dd sees no television.

I have never owned a tv in my adult life!


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## Kira's mom (Nov 30, 2004)

My dd loves to watch movies. She likes to pick from a variety of sesame street,Barney, Wiggles...SHREK and has recently asked for her Baby Einstein again(now watching with a million "What's That?"s) She can watch Shrek from start to finish. She also loves books (and often 'reads' while watching) Normally it's in the morning while I get it together or with daddy at night.We are always running to the zoo,park.mommy and me yoga etc,so it's not all day or even every day.I only watch tv after she's asleep. She's 25 months and was attracted to the screen very young. I spent alot of time bf'ing in front of the tube.I still spend alot of time bf'ing BTW. Am I a bad mom? Is this going to haunt me later?


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## irinam (Oct 27, 2004)

We canceled our subscription to (what was it Cable or Dish? don't even remember now) about a year ago, just cuz there was nothing good on! and we did not have time to watch it. and we had to watch our finances.

Anyway, DD never really saw any broadcast TV, for even when we had subscription we would watch it at night when she was asleep.

Now, just cartoons on DVD or tape, but - she does not care for them!!! Sometimes I would LOVE a cartoon to "babysit" for me :LOL while I do something around the house

No-o-o, her highness would choose to play "party" or "hide-and-seek" or "teacher" over cartoon any time :LOL


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## muttix2 (Apr 24, 2005)

Ds watches TV. Mostly its PBS and dvds. He actually likes some of the PBS learning shows better than the cartoons I let him watch on PBS!







We have "no TV" days 3 days a week, always. Sometimes I'll throw in an extra day when I feel like it. This works for us.


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## allgirls (Apr 16, 2004)

I haven't read all the threads but just wanted to post a different reason...

I was very strict about tv with my first 2 children...it was incredibly limited...a movie on their birthday or maybe if they were sick...that was it.

My second daughter has now been diagnosed with a reading disability...and because she wasn't able to get a lot of knowledge out of books, television would have been very helpful to her. Not fluff tv but educational television. Now there are a lot of concepts/information she does not get/have because her exposure to those things was so limited.

So now she watches oodles of tv...she particularly likes Discovery channel...she has always had a great interest in animals so we do a lot of that. We also rent animal movies and such...they still get some "fun" movies but I am still strict on that.

Anyway, now with my new daughter(22mos) I allow limited television...The Big Comfy Couch, Sesame Street, a couple cartoons that I find acceptable and occasionally Barney. (she doesn't watch all these every day btw, just maybe one or two)

So I guess what I am trying to say is that it's not necessarily a bad thing and can be a great tool...it just shouldn't probably be the only tool and should be closely moderated by the parent.


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## jillene (Apr 8, 2005)

We have it on sometimes. He loves the Wiggles and Rolie Polie Olie and JoJo's Circus but doesn't pay attention to any of the other shows if I leave it on for background noise. We live in a crappy neighborhood at the moment with people who blast their pretty inappropriate and explicit rap music and I'd rather he hear whatever's on Disney Channel than that crap. But most of the time we're in his bedroom reading or playing cars or something. He likes to dance to the Wiggles, they're definitely his favorite. It's useful when I'm trying to get housecleaning done. Otherwise he wants to "help" and that makes it impossible to do anything. lol


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## jillene (Apr 8, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kira's mom*
My dd loves to watch movies. She likes to pick from a variety of sesame street,Barney, Wiggles...SHREK and has recently asked for her Baby Einstein again(now watching with a million "What's That?"s) She can watch Shrek from start to finish. She also loves books (and often 'reads' while watching) Normally it's in the morning while I get it together or with daddy at night.We are always running to the zoo,park.mommy and me yoga etc,so it's not all day or even every day.I only watch tv after she's asleep. She's 25 months and was attracted to the screen very young. I spent alot of time bf'ing in front of the tube.I still spend alot of time bf'ing BTW. Am I a bad mom? Is this going to haunt me later?


I don't think you're a bad mom at all. It sounds like it's all in moderation. My son also loves Shrek and Shrek 2 (he asks for donkey) and Finding Nemo. He generally just gets to watch them in the car for long trips (like the 6 hour drive to see family) because it keeps him entertained and allows us to get there faster if we don't have to stop to calm his screaming every hour or so when he gets bored. I don't think that makes us bad parents. *shrug*

I also did a lot of BFing in front of the tv, or in front of my computer. What else do you do while breastfeeding a newborn? It kept me from getting too stir crazy during growth spurts (which we had a lot of because DS was a preemie). Aidan's doing just fine though. He loves to read more than anything or play with his cars or blocks or play doh or stickers. He's just started getting into the Baby Einstein stuff (he loves Baby Beethoven and names everything he sees and dances and such) and he loves the Wiggles. But we also sit and talk about them while he watches or we dance and sing together so it's helped build his vocabulary and motor skills. TV isn't the devil when used appropriately, imo.


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## wednesday (Apr 26, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jillene*
I also did a lot of BFing in front of the tv, or in front of my computer. What else do you do while breastfeeding a newborn?

Isn't that the truth? I'm just about as anti-TV as they come but thank god we had cable right after DS was born. I could not master nursing him lying down for weeks. And I was so exhausted from round-the-clock feedings that I'm sure I would have dropped the poor child numerous times if I hadn't had Crank Yankers and Punk'd to keep me (barely) awake as DS fed.


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## jillene (Apr 8, 2005)

I don't even remember what I watched now. I think I watched The View a lot and I know I watched Ellen in the afternoons. Hmmm. It was mostly mindless blather to give me something to think about other than how long I'd been sitting there and what else needed doing (like dishes, laundry, sweeping, etc).


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## TortelliniMama (Mar 11, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *wednesday*
And I was so exhausted from round-the-clock feedings that I'm sure I would have dropped the poor child numerous times if I hadn't had Crank Yankers and Punk'd to keep me (barely) awake as DS fed.

For me, it was a lot of Law and Order. The funny thing was, I kept the sound turned down and the closed captioning on, because I couldn't bear the thought of this innocent little baby hearing about these horrible crimes. (even though he wouldn't have had the vocabulary to understand it). Maybe he'll be allowed to watch it when he's about 45. You know, right after he starts dating...


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## AppleOrangePear (Apr 17, 2004)

Quote:

My second daughter has now been diagnosed with a reading disability...and because she wasn't able to get a lot of knowledge out of books, television would have been very helpful to her. Not fluff tv but educational television. Now there are a lot of conc
SO you are saying that your daughter has LD because she was kept from watching Television?









(Learning disabilities can NOT be triggered by lack of TV.. However , learning disabilities can be triggered by tv)

Real Life is a great 'tool' to learning...

Michele


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## fugeeo (Apr 23, 2005)

Halo,
Well, I am waiting to be a parent, but I want to reflect on my life as going into adulthood.

I grew up watching a lot of TV. Probably not as a toddler, and indeed I think I was a smart child because we didn't watch TV as toddlers. But towards later years, I really grew a habit with the tv. Partly as not being a son of a single mom, my after school activities were pretty much revolved around the TV.

I developed a bad habit, and reruns or not, I would watch it all, and I knew the schedule backwards and forwards. And growing up into adulthood, I really did lack my own imagination, and knew hardly anything about spirit.

For me, TV became a single world, and everything outside really didn't matter.

It made a difference, however, that my mother was often a topic in the news, as a Chicana activist, but otherwise I think I would have been lost.

Finishing my undergraduate years, I developed schizophrenia !

Well, this was partially fortunate, and partially unfortunate, but overtime, I learned to see more clearly. Within my fortune, I learned meditation from a Native American friend. And it opened a gateway in my brain. Meditation makes ordinary life like a movie. Because indeed it triggers the same brain waves. Movies trigger alpha waves, as does meditation. Well, using the imagination to extremes also triggers these waves, I believe.

So, entering these waves, gives people a means to communication. Within meditation (and probably childhood imagination), we create our own realm (a body centric phenomenon) that helps form our patterns around us. However, with TV, the centricity is around an entity that is not near our selves, it is very distanced, and it removes our focuses from self/local importance.

See, in this world, we really need to focus on what we can do individually, and see how each person can contribute. Unfortunately TV, becomes peoples modes of understanding one another, which really devastates intercommunication at a local level.

Currently, I live on a small island in the Caribbean, and it has been very fortunate for me to see how a small community can live with very little fear. Every day, many people hitch hike to work, and usually people are very friendly, and giving. However, we see in the US, that people will never give another person a ride, unless, they are truckers or someone that others have some fear from. See, people are so self focussed, or even focussed on these TV events that are so far from our real lives. It is also unfortunate, that kids in this small island also watch US tv, because we see how it is changing the way people think, on a fast life. Videos are very harmful. We can see just by a few generation changes, how TV is changing life in a bad way.

Getting back to alpha waves, well, I find that the TV is like a magnet of these waves. Once you get in the zone of these electromagnetic waves, it also rearranges who you are. Even when a TV is plugged in near me, I can sense the changes in me. And then there are so many subliminal messages, that one has to be careful about the ideas it gives to children.

Anyway, I've been without medicine for schizophrenia for over 3 years now, and I can honestly say that not watching TV is part of my health track.

Like a previous person said, nowadays when I see a tv on, I don't understand the draw, there is no real humour, and so much is really just meant to draw people to patriotic, sexual, violent material, that it really is not healthy.

I do however, enjoy seeing a movie that is a documentary that details a real persons life, or shows me part of the world that I do not know, because it is mind opening.

But be very careful that one's mind is not limited to the small expanse of tV. There is much more to life that TV and the beliefs that can be found within it, and within even the whole realm of generations that has grown up with it as their past time.

Sincerely,
Refugio Rochin, Papa in waiting.







:

PS. and another side of TV, one also needs to be aware when it replaces the love and companionship of family and friends. Best to seek the families that work there hardest to always be in activity with each other learning to create, and knowing how to trust their own creative abilities. And then when one sees these families, one can see the difference.


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## momto1QT (Apr 19, 2005)

DD will be 22 months soon. Especially since she is under the age of 2, we do not allow her to watch any TV, movies, or anything. IMO, at this age I feel she needs to be active in her environment---seeing, touching, tasting, smelling, etc. Personally, I think it helps her focus and concentrate better. It's just what works for OUR family right now. I'm not making a judgement on whether TV is good OR bad, in general.


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## mosky22 (Jan 4, 2004)

Just going to add my $0.02.

We let dd 30m, watch t.v. , exclusively PBS or Noggin, or DVD. No commercials. She watches, Dragon Tales, Dora and Zoobomafo. She used to watch Baby Einstien and Elmo, but she has kind of grown out of them. Although occasionally she will ask specifically for them. I like these shows, she gets up and dances and sings with Dragon Tales, she answers Dora and Zoobomafa, is just fun and informative. As far as the whole commercailism thing. I have gone to great lengths to avoid any books or toys whith t.v. characters on them. In otherwords no Dora books or toys or clothes. I don't mind her enjoyinbg these characters, but I don't want her becoming obsessed with them. Just my way of trying to balence things out.

As far as how much no more than 1 hour a day, and not everyday.


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## Icequeen_in_ak (Mar 6, 2004)

Yes, I let my daughter watch TV.... as I usually have it on in the background, I guess just for noise. I'm usually on network tv or music channels (satelite music, NOT mtv) they only time she ever pays attention to it is if Baby Einstein is on. If BE isn't on... she could care less.


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