# Would it be bad to start babywearing at three months?



## judeslittlemom (Dec 31, 2013)

My little is a month old today, but we won't have money for the wrap I want realistically for a few more weeks at least plus shipping time. (We have money, but it's all set aside for things we NEED since we're catching up from Christmas, of course, but I want the Boba Baby Wrap!) Would it be bad for me to start him around three months? I really don't know much about it at all and I could use some help. Could you guys link me to some information? What do I really need to know? The help is much appreciated!


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## crayfishgirl (May 26, 2009)

It would be fine, but have you tried the Boba? I didn't have the BobaWrap, but did have a Moby, and I had moved onto the Ergo by the time he was around 4 months because he had gotten too heavy to keep the wrap tight and wanted a bit more room to move. If you haven't test driven it with your little one, I would suggest that in the interim you find a store that carries a bunch of different carriers/wraps and try them....you might find that the Boba doesn't work for you/your baby. Another avenue (and potential source to borrow carriers) is a local LaLeche League. Our group frequently had "baby wearing nights" in which mamas brought in their various carriers. Good luck.


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## FTMom (Sep 16, 2013)

Just an added note-I purchased my ergo and maya ring sling used off craigslist. I paid $30.00 for the ring sling and $45.00 for an organic ergo used twice. I bought two for less then the new price of one! Just a thought.


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## Alexsandra (Apr 25, 2013)

IMO, the most important thing for your infant and family is for him to be carried now. i would do ANY THING possible to get a sling and make carrying your infant #1 priority. The benefits show up in a few short months. Breast feeding and carrying an infant from birth to creeping or crawling is the most powerful way to bond with your baby and makes them super secure and content.

You can make a sling with 2 yards of fabric from the fabric store. Or, cut a sheet to size from the thrift store. Tie the opposite corners together and put at a diagonal over one shoulder and make a pouch on the opposite hip for the baby to be in. You can adjust the knot to make the sling fit your body. My friend, a doctor who could afford any sling, chose to make her own like this using colorful fabric. She carried all 3 children from birth until they chose to crawl away from her to explore the world. The idea of carrying your infant from birth to crawling is ancient for the human species could not have survived if we left our offspring unprotected and open to prey. These same biological needs remain in us, as Jean Liedloff describes in the only parenting book a parent will ever need, THe Continum Concept.

All the Best to you and your family!


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## DandDmommy (May 30, 2011)

You know, it is possible to just hold your baby all the time even if you don't have a carrier. My kids are 17 months apart and I found it hard to care for my oldest if I had the baby in a carrier. It was annoying to have to take him in and out when I needed to pick up my oldest or bend over to change her. I actually found it more convenient to have him in the crook of my arm all the time. We both liked it. So a carrier doesn't have to be essential for keeping your baby on you.


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## fruitfulmomma (Jun 8, 2002)

No, you do not need a carrier now. Plenty of babies survive and thrive just fine without them. You can carry baby in arms when you are up and moving around, but at one month old you are going to be spending a lot of time nursing anyway. I never did good with wraps and always preferred to carry them in-arms when they were that tiny. Around 4 months or so when they are starting to move around more we start getting a lot more use out of the carrier, primarily an Ergo.


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## researchparent (Oct 14, 2013)

I really like the Moby Wrap for under 4 months, but if you're saving up for a Boba, how about spending around $10 for a piece of jersey cotton so you can make your own homemade stretchy wrap. There are lots of instructions online. Just google "homemade Moby". I'm pretty sure you don't even have to sew, just cut.


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## katelove (Apr 28, 2009)

Ok, so it looks like the Boba wrap is a stretchy is that right? I would strong recommend that you do not get a stretchy wrap for a 3mo baby if money is tight. You will get very little wear out of it. If you are keen to use a wrap then I would suggest a woven, otherwise a soft-structured carrier like an ergo or Beco which will last you for as long as you want to Babywear.


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## CuddleBug'sMama (Jan 29, 2008)

I agree with Katelove. Your money would be much better spent on a carrier that would last longer. But if you want to try a stretchy wrap now (they're great for newborns), I'd check out thrift shops or Craigslist. I've seen them used for as low as $20. Or like researchparent said you can easily make one. There may be a local babywearing group near you where you could try out different carriers. Check Facebook


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## rktrump (Jan 18, 2013)

Agreed that the stretchy wrap wouldn't be the best investment after the first few months. My little guy lived in our Boba when he was a newborn but we were firmly moved into the Ergo by 6 months and could have done that sooner, I'm sure. I say look into a different kind of carrier if now isn't an option - the stretchy wraps tend to stretch too much once the babe gets bigger.


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## rainbownurse (Dec 19, 2012)

agree with above, stretchy wasn't great for us past 2 months, but my guy is a monster baby. Woven wraps take some getting used to, but the Ergo/Beco/Boba are pretty user friendly. You can try Craigslist or check out the FB page babywearing on a budget, all the wraps/carriers are less than $100.


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## emilysmama (Jun 22, 2005)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Alexsandra*
> 
> IMO, the most important thing for your infant and family is for him to be carried now. i would do ANY THING possible to get a sling and make carrying your infant #1 priority. The benefits show up in a few short months. Breast feeding and carrying an infant from birth to creeping or crawling is the most powerful way to bond with your baby and makes them super secure and content.
> 
> ...


Congratulations to the OP on your baby!

I would be last person to say that I didn't wish that I had started wearing my baby earlier. Yes, it is important to wear your baby and starting earlier is better. But I think I would stop short of saying that I would "do ANY THING possible to get a sling and make carrying your infant #1 priority." That is unnecessarily alarmist, in my opinion.

Yes, there are lots of easy cheap ways to start babywearing. Yes, babywearing makes life unimaginably easier. But no, I don't think it is necessary to be alarmist and lay on a guilt trip. If for whatever reason you don't start wearing your baby until three months, everything will still be fine.

I would have liked to start wearing my baby earlier, but I was majorly sleep deprived, and the silliest reasons that kept me from starting earlier seemed like huge immovable obstacles at the time. So I didn't start wearing my dd until 3 or 4 months, and I went on to wear my dd until she was 5 years old. My dd is almost 10 years old now and she didn't care that I didn't start babywearing just a few months earlier.

However, I can tell you that I wish for my own sake that I had started babywearing earlier because there are many aspects of my life in those early months that would have been a lot easier and more convenient for ME. (For example, the tendonitis that I developed might have vanished sooner. I would have been able to multitask household chores more efficiently.)

So I say that if, after reading about the many cheap and easy ways to start babywearing, you still can't get to it until 3 months, everything will still be fine.

Like the pps, I agree that if you wait until 3 months, skip the stretchy ones, and skip the ring sling. I started with the mei-tai, which was a good choice, and eventually evolved into the Ergo, which is great. At 3 months, I'd suggest going straight to the Ergo, if you can afford it by then. (Again, I didn't get around to buying the Ergo until 1 year old, but I wish I'd purchased it much earlier. Still, I got four years of good use out of it.)


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## rainbownurse (Dec 19, 2012)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *emilysmama*
> 
> Congratulations to the OP on your baby!
> 
> ...


I totally agree with this. I did not like the idea of making my own sling/carrier because I don't trust my own sewing skills. I will say that I LOVE our ring sling, and my guy is 18lbs. Another thing to think about is that some babies just do not like being in a carrier/sling/wrap. Just the way we don't always want to wear a certain pair of pants,or shoes. You can still form a very secure bond and attachment with your child even if you don't wear them 24/7.


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## camerahappymom (Dec 25, 2013)

I understand the benefits of baby wearing....but please don't let anyone tell you that you can't or won't bond with your baby unless you wear them. I have an almost 15 year old, and an 11 year old, and a 2 year old, and one on the way. Baby wearing was not the 'in thing' in 1999 that I was aware of and my daughter and I bonded just fine and she was/is very well adjusted. It really ticks me off for people think that if you don't' baby wear you are jeopardizing the bonding with your little one. You have 2 wonderful God given arms, and I used mine all the time. That is exactly what they are for. But I do like the idea of going to the fabric store and buying your own fabric .. that sounds like a GREAT idea!


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## emilysmama (Jun 22, 2005)

Sorry camerahappymom,

I didn't mean to imply that the only way to bond with your baby is by wearing the baby. I am completely in agreement with you about carrying the baby in your own arms is just fine. In fact, for the first three months of my dd's life, I didn't have a carrier and carry in my arms is exactly what i did, and I did that a lot. It was only when I developed pain in my arms as a result that I searched for a less painful alternative, and baby wearing is what I came up with. And thank goodness for that! But yes, if a mother's arms are strong enough, then carrying in the arms are great. After all, that's what they're there for!


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## camerahappymom (Dec 25, 2013)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *emilysmama*
> 
> Sorry camerahappymom,
> 
> I didn't mean to imply that the only way to bond with your baby is by wearing the baby. I am completely in agreement with you about carrying the baby in your own arms is just fine. In fact, for the first three months of my dd's life, I didn't have a carrier and carry in my arms is exactly what i did, and I did that a lot. It was only when I developed pain in my arms as a result that I searched for a less painful alternative, and baby wearing is what I came up with. And thank goodness for that! But yes, if a mother's arms are strong enough, then carrying in the arms are great. After all, that's what they're there for!


I get it.. I just get so tired of being around these crunchy granola mom's that think they are better than you because they are baby wearing, breastfeeding, etc.. I am a avid breastfeeder, I just choose to keep mine covered out of respect for myself.. I wasnt' fond of baby wearing because I was so afraid the baby was gonna fall right through the Moby  My husband wore our baby LOL..and he loved it. I just have not found one that does not hurt my back. I tried the over the shoulder baby holder, and loved it. did not realized it came in sizes..and I bought one too big  so there again I struck out. Sorry I sounded so offensive.. i do love the idea about making my own. I don't' understand why they charge so much for them..it's just fabric..


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## greenkri (Jun 10, 2013)

Fabric IS expensive, especially fabric that you need to be strong enough to carry a baby. I priced out what it would cost, in just fabric alone, to make a Mei Tai for someone I know and it was on par with some of the less expensive manufactured carriers you can buy. This was just factoring in fabric costs and not getting any money for my labor. Of course large manufacturers get wholesale priced fabric so they can still actually make money above and beyond materials costs.

I echo others comments about trying to find something second hand now if you can. I've found great deals on carriers in consignment shops (under $20). Of course this only helps if your area has a good babywearing population to provide those pre-owned carriers. The sooner you can get a carrier, the easier you will probably find it is to function with a teeny baby. However, you can start at any age really.


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## rainbownurse (Dec 19, 2012)

https://www.facebook.com/groups/156002947911287/
this is the babywearing on a budget fb page, all carriers under $100!!


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## heyitskalista (Feb 14, 2012)

I didn't start wearing my eldest until she was about 3 months. Everyone survived just fine. I may have even gained some arm muscles from carrying around my chubby girl! Lol

Like others said, I would skip the stretchy wrap at that point. They aren't great for heavier babies. I started with a mei tai (babyhawk) and loved it. Now we mostly use woven wraps. They've got a higher learning curve but are totally worth it, in my opinion!


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## TheMushyMommy (Aug 21, 2013)

I started my Boba around 2-3 months and I loved it. I wore her in it until she was six months and the only reason why I haven't worn her lately is because I haven't really had a place to wear her. I loved it and she transitioned just fine. Boba usually always has free shipping


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## IdentityCrisisMama (May 12, 2003)

Echoing that baby wearing CAN be very expensive -- I wore my "baby" for YEARS with exactly ONE sling that I got second hand. The thing is in tatters.







Many years later I had my second and the selection of slings is amazing now! Global import economy and industrious babywearers, made for quite a change.

My advice is that YES you can absolutely start babywearing at 3 months. I agree with a PP who said that a pair of arms are probably the best for the first couple of months anyway.

As far as what type... well, I don't even know what a Boomba Baby wrap is.







Oh, I looked it up and it is a knit type wrap. Gosh, check Craigslist (if you're in the states), consignment, or those big swaps. Because those knit carriers are relatively affordable, user friendly, and can only be used for a short period, they are ALWAYS being sold second hand. Of, better -- post on Facebook (or have a friend do it for you) and just ask around if anyone has one in storage. There's nothing that eases parent guilt over all the stuff we got for our baby that we didn't use it's lending some of it out to new parents!

As for other options -- a woven wrap is more versatile because you can wear your child in one for WAY longer. But, they are very expensive. They do have a very good re-sale rate though so it's not a bad "investment", however that also means it's difficult to find a good deal second hand. You can also make a wrap out of gauze, which is more affordable than most woven fabric.

I am a big fan of the open tailed ring sling in a nice woven fabric. My favorite is the Maya Wrap (specifically the older, more traditional fabrics). That was what I used for my first back in '01 when that, Didymos, New Native and OTSBH were the only game in town. With my second I rented a Girasol woven wrap, made a gauze wrap, owned an Ergo, and tried a whole bunch of other slings and still preferred the Maya, which I bought on Ebay for like $20. If you go the used Maya route, they have updated their shoulder design and it is much better but there are online tutorials for how to do it yourself. If you have a sewing machine it's like a 30 minute project.

The only truly inferior sling that I've tried was a modern machine woven fabric ring sling. These fabrics (like the ones you get from a typical fabric store) need to be doubled to make a sling and they are very inferior in terms of how they slide in the rings. So, yea, fabric really does matter. Watch out for that.

Otherwise it's just a matter of finding was try a few things. See if your city has a babywearing group. And, good luck!


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## Ireadtomuch (Jul 12, 2013)

Or if you can get a little cash together several wrap sites sell second quality wraps with small flaws that don't affect structure or safety and they come in at under a hundred dollars.


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## filamentary (Aug 15, 2013)

i saw a lot of suggestions and useful feedback about wrap-carriers in here that i'll have to refer back to, so i'm subscribing to this thread. still a smidgen early for me, but the world of wraps seems overwhelming at this point b/c i haven't delved in yet... while i'm at it, lemme just ask if anyone has experience with this one?: http://www.risaroo.com/woven-wraps/girasol/amitola-azarafan-diamond-weave (i'm just absolutely in love with this fabric)


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## IdentityCrisisMama (May 12, 2003)

Yes, I think that is the fabric I rented. I think I am just not a wrap type girl. For one, I am in the states and even though I am in the city, I am still in and out of the car quite often. I need a sling that you can pop the baby in and out of with ease. Woven wraps do not fit this description, IMO. Also, it's A LOT of fabric. I always felt smothered and a little conspicuous. And, I don't think breasfeeding is as comfortable in the wrap compared to a ring sling - but my kids have always been sort of cluster/comfort nursers. I like to be able to just pop the kid on the boob for a quick second if need be. That is easier to do in a ring sling.


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## filamentary (Aug 15, 2013)

ok, good to know. =) they offer conversion of those fabrics into a ring sling for $90, but i bet i could get the rings and do it myself for far less. i am guessing that the rings make it faster to take on & off, like a buckle, as opposed to tying knots? again, i know so very little about wraps/slings/carriers yet, so i'm just guessing based on pictures i've seen. honestly i imagine that much of the time i'll be doing half the work with my arms, like, even if i do have the baby's weight supported by fabric, i'll keep the baby from leaning out with some arm support? i am definitely looking at the fabric as being helpful, as opposed to cumbersome, unless we're on a hike and i need baby really securely strapped in (and then, maybe a structured backpack style one would be a good choice). i assume having just one baby will make all such decisions loads easier, since i will never be in desperate quick need of two free hands, like stopping a toddler running in the street while trying to situate an infant. if the things frustrate me when i am in a hurry, i can always go all-arms at that moment... (sorry, i think i'm rambling at this point!)


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## rainbownurse (Dec 19, 2012)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *IdentityCrisisMama*
> 
> Yes, I think that is the fabric I rented. I think I am just not a wrap type girl. For one, I am in the states and even though I am in the city, I am still in and out of the car quite often. I need a sling that you can pop the baby in and out of with ease. Woven wraps do not fit this description, IMO. Also, it's A LOT of fabric. I always felt smothered and a little conspicuous. And, I don't think breasfeeding is as comfortable in the wrap compared to a ring sling - but my kids have always been sort of cluster/comfort nursers. I like to be able to just pop the kid on the boob for a quick second if need be. That is easier to do in a ring sling.


depending on the type of carrier you do you can pop in and out. FCC and poppins hip carry come to mind first.


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## IdentityCrisisMama (May 12, 2003)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *rainbownurse*
> 
> depending on the type of carrier you do you can pop in and out. FCC and poppins hip carry come to mind first.


Yes, I'm sure there are! I def. think that the versatility of the wrap is appealing but because I didn't personally like them, maybe someone else can sing their praises. For me, the ring sling served all my needs and I found that I was always using the wrap in ways that mimicked the ring sling.


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## greenkri (Jun 10, 2013)

Most carries should be independently secure, so you don't have to hold the baby or keep an eye so they don't pop out. If the carry is done correctly, they won't pop out.


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## researchparent (Oct 14, 2013)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *IdentityCrisisMama*
> 
> Yes, I'm sure there are! I def. think that the versatility of the wrap is appealing but because I didn't personally like them, maybe someone else can sing their praises. For me, the ring sling served all my needs and I found that I was always using the wrap in ways that mimicked the ring sling.


Well I can definitely sing the praises of wraps, especially for at home, because I have a ring sling, but just never really fell in love with it. I liked my Maya wrap (ring sling) a lot when my babies were newborns and their legs were froggied in, but I always felt more conspicuous nursing them than in my woven and moby (stretchy) wraps. I used the tail of the sling to cover their heads, but since the tail wasn't really secure, I couldn't forget about it. In my wraps, I just pulled some fabric over their heads and was able to sit, walk around, do chores, etc.(and they nursed ALL THE TIME in wraps. They considered it a self serve buffet.) I also had problems with the ring sling a couple of times where my babies wobbly heads hit the rings and made them cry, but maybe I had the rings placed wrong, because I've never heard of anyone else having that problem. As they got bigger, there were definitely a few months where I didn't really feel comfortable using the ring sling, because they were starting to want their legs out, but I felt like they were still a little too spastic for me to trust they weren't going to do some sort of plank position leg stretch and slip through. That was never an issue with wraps. However, now if I'm making dinner or something and my two year old wakes up from a nap fussy, I'll use the ring sling because it's quick and easy to get on and off and she's definitely secure as a toddler. However, now she's heavy enough that my shoulder starts to hurt if I wear her for more than like 15-20 minutes, so if I'm going to be wearing her a long time I use my Ergo. As far as going out with an infant, I would typically leave my ring sling in the car for emergencies, but wear my Moby (having put it on at home) and just pop baby in and out at all the stops. For long walks I'd use a woven wrap, again putting it on at home. I never tried putting a wrap on in a parking lot. I'm not that skilled.


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## IdentityCrisisMama (May 12, 2003)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *researchparent*
> 
> However, now she's heavy enough that my shoulder starts to hurt if I wear her for more than like 15-20 minutes, so if I'm going to be wearing her a long time I use my Ergo.


The Ergo wasn't around when my first was young, which I'm a little happy about because I think I would have gravitated towards that and missed out on how much I came to love the ring sling. I've heard A LOT of people say the ring sling doesn't offer enough support. For some reason that cross-body put the weight in all the right places for me. But I think I have a more sensitive center back and abdomen and maybe more strength in the shoulders/posture than elsewhere. I wore my DC for HOURS and hours in a ring sling until she was *very* old. To give a clue -- she was born in 01 and I wore her to President Obama's inauguration. That was pretty extreme but I brought it because I wasn't sure what the crowds would be like. Turns out that I ended up having to wear her for a good chunk of the day. I did retire the sling after that though. I also nursed more easily in the ring sling but do agree that it's less discrete.

I think another personality thing is whether we are the type to use different slings for different needs. In the end, this style wasn't for me either. I'm a huge flake and it was just a lot easier on me to pick one carrier and stick with it.

In some ways, that is the best credit to wraps because they really are the ultimate versatile carrier. When tied correctly I found that the baby was virtually weightless in a woven wrap.


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