# Silly things you've been told about breastfeeding



## Katielady (Nov 3, 2006)

I thought it might be fun to share some of the silly, outrageous, and just plain WRONG things people have told us about breastfeeding over the years. 

I went in with my second for the 6 month well visit. I was already unhappy with this doctor but hadn't decided whether to look for a new one yet. She asked how DD was sleeping, and I said lightly, "She sleeps great!" She pressed further, "Does she wake up at all?" I answered, "She wakes up a few times to nurse, but we both go right back to sleep." She then gravely told me that I should stop the night-nursing and that she didn't need it any more. I just sort of nodded and smiled, eager for the subject to be closed so we could talk about actual medical issues.  She sensed that I wasn't really agreeing with her, and went on to say, "You know, studies have shown that getting up in the middle of the night to eat is linked with obesity."

So basically she equated my 6-month-old baby's night-nursing with an adult getting up at 3AM to eat fried chicken.














I was sitting there thinking, "Either she thinks I'm an idiot, or she's one- either way this is just not working out." hahaha.

Share yours!


----------



## dakotablue (Jun 21, 2009)

I was told that nursing my toddler while pregnant would make my baby not grow and it would come out tiny. 8lbs isn't too tiny









Oh and nursing my baby past 6 months would make him into a sex crazy pervert...yeah


----------



## akind1 (Jul 16, 2009)

My sister asked (when I became pregnant with #2 when DS was about 15 months) if DS was still nursing, and I said, actually, no, because the milk is gone, but otherwise we still would be. She wondered if nursing (past a year) would make him perverted or something. And she's got a degree in early childhood development!!!

I said noooo, many places actually recommend bf'ing until age 2.

Also, got asked (though in a nice curious, non-obnoxious way) if your milk goes "bad" after baby is 1.

I am also fascinated by what other people call it when baby eats/nurses. DH's grandma calls it "ninnies" - though this appears to be what she calls it regardless of whether it is formula or breastmilk. I've heard it called "num-nums" too and I think "ne-ne"

DS never called it anything, just pointed to the boobs.


----------



## contactmaya (Feb 21, 2006)

With my first baby, i was advised to wash my nipples with soap and water after every feeding. I didnt follow that advice, because it seemed really stupid to me, even though i didnt know much about breastfeeding then. For a start, that much soap and water on sensitive nipples is going to cause thrush in no time.

Later, when my almost 2yo was still nursing, his pediatrician advised me to wean, saying that it ''infantilized' him. Seriously?

Another time, a speech therapist advised me to wean my 6month old, because it caused mouth deformities that effected speech.

There are some real idiots out there, that call themselves professionals.


----------



## contactmaya (Feb 21, 2006)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *dakotablue*
> 
> I was told that nursing my toddler while pregnant would make my baby not grow and it would come out tiny. 8lbs isn't too tiny


I nursed ds1 throughout my 2nd pregnancy. Ds2 was born 9lbs 4.


----------



## cat13 (Dec 8, 2010)

I was told to "rough up" my nipples while I was pregnant to get them used to being nursed on. I guess that kind of advice was pretty common in my mother's generation.


----------



## tooraloora (Oct 15, 2010)

When I was in transistional housing and DS was a newborn, the lady that ran the program told me that breastfeeding was irresponsible, because no one eats healthy enough to produce good milk. Even if her argument had an ounce of truth to it, it was a terrible argument to use on me since I'm borderline obsessive about healthy eating, and I'd done my research on breastfeeding anyways. She quizzed me constantly about my diet trying to find proof that I wasn't healthy enough to breastfeed. She was full of bizarre "facts" and advice.


----------



## girlspn (Apr 14, 2011)

Relatives and friends looked pointedly at my chest and said, "You won't have enough milk. Chinese women rarely have enough milk."


----------



## sere234 (Feb 7, 2009)

Oh my gosh, this is hilarious!!!

Mine: You can nurse him? But your breasts are so small!!!

I THOUGHT: Wow, thanks! Openly I laughed and said that yep, they still work


----------



## WittyNameHere (Dec 21, 2011)

These are hysterical. I had a real doozy from my DS's former pediatrician. I never felt quite comfortable with her, which should have been a sign that the relationship wasn't the best for us, but she was close by. At his one year well-baby visit she asked what he ate and I told her he was exclusively breastfed. She looked completely aghast and said, "But how do you even know if it's good after a year?!" Those were her exact words. "... How do you even know if it's good after a year?" A pediatrician said that. Wow.

Needless to say, I found a new pediatrician the very next day.


----------



## dakotablue (Jun 21, 2009)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *WittyNameHere*
> 
> These are hysterical. I had a real doozy from my DS's former pediatrician. I never felt quite comfortable with her, which should have been a sign that the relationship wasn't the best for us, but she was close by. At his one year well-baby visit she asked what he ate and I told her he was exclusively breastfed. She looked completely aghast and said, "But how do you even know if it's good after a year?!" Those were her exact words. "... How do you even know if it's good after a year?" A pediatrician said that. Wow.
> 
> Needless to say, I found a new pediatrician the very next day.


hehe didn't you know breast milk has an expiration date


----------



## strawberryprincess (Apr 30, 2005)

When my first was born, my mother was adamant that new mothers needed to drink plenty of milk so that they could make milk. At first I thought this was logical, but as I thought about it, I've never seen a lactating cow drink milk, and they make lots!


----------



## cat13 (Dec 8, 2010)

This morning I went to the doctor's office and the nurse (who is an OB nurse) was asking me intake questions. I told her my 5mo is EBF and is a big chunky guy at almost 20lbs. She looked shocked and asked how a baby that big could survive on just milk alone!


----------



## onetwoten (Aug 13, 2007)

DD is 6 weeks and experiencing some decent reflux issues. While we were trying to troubleshoot still, my mother continually told me that I should go to my doctor and get my milk tested, because with all four of us, she was only able to breastfeed until 3 months... and then her milk went sour.

How do you politely tell your own mother that she's been duped big time and has no opportunity to go back and correct it?


----------



## Katielady (Nov 3, 2006)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *jeninejessica*
> 
> DD is 6 weeks and experiencing some decent reflux issues. While we were trying to troubleshoot still, my mother continually told me that I should go to my doctor and get my milk tested, because with all four of us, she was only able to breastfeed until 3 months... and then her milk went sour.
> 
> How do you politely tell your own mother that she's been duped big time and has no opportunity to go back and correct it?


Oh man. Well no need to tell her, it'll just hurt her and as you said, there's nothing she can do now. Just focus on your own situation, and tell white lies if you have to- tell her your doctor said there's no reason to worry about the quality of your milk.

As a tangent, my first had horrible reflux and went on meds for it and I was told by his pediatric gastro that I shouldn't bother cutting dairy or anything else from my diet. He was later (after I'd weaned) diagnosed with a dairy intolerance. With DD, as soon as she showed signs of reflux I cut out dairy. It took a week but was like turning off a faucet. I didn't even need to carry a bupr cloth any more. Then I started to doubt it and on mother's day had a massive dairy binge at a brunch buffet- strawberries and cream etc. Three days of constant puking from her.  Anyway, point is, might be worth checking out your diet if you haven't already. It takes some time for the allergens to clear out but it can make a difference. And if you're already tried that I apologize for the unsolicited advice.


----------



## tooraloora (Oct 15, 2010)

I got a new one today. I was talking to an old friend on the phone, and upon learning that DS is still breastfeeding at 17 months, she asked "Now don't you think it's time to wean?". I said he would stop breastfeeding when he's ready, but that I hope to continue until at least 2. After a dramatic bout of choking and sputtering, she informed me that if I let him nurse that long, he will grow up to be obsessed with breasts. I cracked up. Yes, I must wean him now else he is doomed to be a boob man.


----------



## dakotablue (Jun 21, 2009)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *jeninejessica*
> 
> DD is 6 weeks and experiencing some decent reflux issues. While we were trying to troubleshoot still, my mother continually told me that I should go to my doctor and get my milk tested, because with all four of us, she was only able to breastfeed until 3 months... and then her milk went sour.
> 
> How do you politely tell your own mother that she's been duped big time and has no opportunity to go back and correct it?


I'm sorry,

But Yeah don't tell her. White lie, doctor said I'm good. My grandmother didn't breastfeed after her 1st because one day her milk dryed up and she was told she just couldn't breastfeed so the next two were condensed milk/ corn syrup babies. A little prodding...Yeah her milk did dry up but because of pregnancy with my uncle. There's no point in telling her now, it would just make her feel bad.

But BOY it makes me mad at those stupid doctors.


----------



## PatioGardener (Aug 11, 2007)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *tooraloora*
> 
> I got a new one today. I was talking to an old friend on the phone, and upon learning that DS is still breastfeeding at 17 months, she asked "Now don't you think it's time to wean?". I said he would stop breastfeeding when he's ready, but that I hope to continue until at least 2. After a dramatic bout of choking and sputtering, she informed me that if I let him nurse that long, he will grow up to be obsessed with breasts. I cracked up. Yes, I must wean him now else he is doomed to be a boob man.


----------



## akind1 (Jul 16, 2009)

I have no doubt my son is and will be a boob man. (Now, whether that's due to breastfeeding or not, I can't say)

What will it do to your daughters? Just curious.

On a related, but not, note, DH's grandma told us DS's sucking his thumb would give him big lips. LOL

I have gotten alot of comments to the effect that "doesn't your milk go bad after a year?" like it's got an expiration date.


----------



## onetwoten (Aug 13, 2007)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *dakotablue*
> 
> I'm sorry,
> 
> But Yeah don't tell her. White lie, doctor said I'm good. My grandmother didn't breastfeed after her 1st because one day her milk dryed up and she was told she just couldn't breastfeed so the next two were condensed milk/ corn syrup babies. A little prodding...Yeah her milk did dry up but because of pregnancy with my uncle. There's no point in telling her now, it would just make her feel bad.


Oh no, I mean I wouldn't actually tell her, you guys are right, no good could come of it, but it makes me so frustrated, especially because now she thinks it really is a valid concern, and brings it up almost every time we talk.

I was at a LLL meeting last night, and one of the girls who has a 14 month old was told by her dentist that her son needs to nightwean, because he's getting spots on his teeth from the milk. And if she doesn't wean, then she has to get up and brush his teeth after every nursing session.


----------



## monkeyscience (Feb 5, 2008)

Quote:



> Originally Posted by *akind1*
> 
> I have no doubt my son is and will be a boob man. (Now, whether that's due to breastfeeding or not, I can't say)
> 
> What will it do to your daughters? Just curious.


Clearly, it will make them lesbians. Which is why there are so many more now than "back in the old days", because more babies are EBF'd now... oh, wait. No, no they're not. Myth BUSTED!

Also, I'm virtually certain dh was not BF'd past a year, and he's DEFINITELY a boob man... must have come from watching his mom BF his younger sisters, I guess.









No one has personally told me anything dumb about BF'ing yet, but I'm sure it will happen once I actually start doing it.


----------



## livacreature (Feb 8, 2011)

I'm lucky to be surrounded by pro-breastfeeding folks...but on the bus, a lady was going on about her daughter planning on breastfeeding and her fears that her grandchild would be MORE INCLINED TO BE A CANNIBAL!

I found very important papers to look through. Not touching that crazy with a ten foot poll.


----------



## dakotablue (Jun 21, 2009)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *livacreature*
> 
> I'm lucky to be surrounded by pro-breastfeeding folks...but on the bus, a lady was going on about her daughter planning on breastfeeding and her fears that her grandchild would be MORE INCLINED TO BE A CANNIBAL!
> 
> I found very important papers to look through. Not touching that crazy with a ten foot poll.










she figured out our evil plan!!!!


----------



## KristyDi (Jun 5, 2007)

Another one of those things where there no point in telling an older woman that her dr. was either flat wrong or lying to her. My DH's grandmother warned me several times when DD was an infant to watch her growth because when her 2nd was 5 months old her milk suddenly "turned to water" and she had to wean. This was what her dr. told her when her 5 month old apparently wasn't gaining as much weight as expected.


----------



## GoddessKristie (Oct 31, 2006)

These are hilarious! It's amazing the things people think up!

When I was pregnant my (childless) sister INSISTED on getting me bottles. She was adamant that if I wanted to breastfeed that I needed to pump and give it in a bottle because she knew about foremilk and hindmilk and was very concerned that the baby wouldn't get the proper ratio. The milk has to be mixed up to make sure that happens. How else will you know the baby is getting proper nutrition!?

I still have those bottles...in a closet somewhere...still in the original packaging...


----------



## mommy212 (Mar 2, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *azhie*
> 
> Relatives and friends looked pointedly at my chest and said, "You won't have enough milk. Chinese women rarely have enough milk."


bahaha, yes, that explains why there are so many chinese people in the world, because their mothers can hardly ever feed them...


----------



## blackbird2 (Apr 14, 2008)

A pediatrician I was interviewing while pregnant recommended against co-sleeping because with all the extra nursing I would get no sleep. She said, "It's like if somebody offered you a milkshake every hour, you'd take it, right?"

Um, no, I actually don't think I would. As an adult I could drink shakes all day, but I don't. And what if we're not talking dessert, but an actual healthy meal - like breastmilk is for a baby. Would you eat an egg salad sandwich every hour? Would we all eat constantly if given the chance??


----------



## Hymanroth (Jul 6, 2011)

My husbands grandmother kept telling me and urging me to not breastfeed past 6 months and that my milk is no longer good ... :O I was even a little worried. I don't know why I let her get to me b/c I read everything that says bm is the best.

My son is 6 months (and 20 perfect chunky monkey lbs) in a couple days and EBF - besides playing with some solids (like raw veggies) here and there ....

My FIL once said that I should give him food b/c he is too hungry to be satisfied by BM ... ok.

and my husbands sister and mother pleaded with me to pump my milk instead of breastfeed b/c I would have no life and I need to get away. Umm.. I love being with my son  lol


----------



## Hymanroth (Jul 6, 2011)

blackbird, that's really funny







... every mom I know is so desperately exhausted and getting no sleep and their babies do not sleep .... but my son sleeps with my husband and I in bed and has since birth and we've all had the best sleep! Yeah, I have exhausted days, but that's just how I am even before pregnancy and baby.


----------



## bookwise (Jan 14, 2011)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *cat13*
> 
> I was told to "rough up" my nipples while I was pregnant to get them used to being nursed on. I guess that kind of advice was pretty common in my mother's generation.


same here! my ob said it right in the middle of examining me during one of monthly pregnancy visits - she grabbed one of my nipples and, i don't know any other words, kinda *plucked* at it and then *kneaded* it, like bread.. and then did it again. i was shocked and embarrassed. the next month, i asked her not to do that, a bit shyly, but still please don't do that. she did it again, laughing me off.

i switched obs that week, had my homebirth baby a few months later, and besides the normal adjustments one makes when first breastfeeding (yeah, it hurt a little! but i'm sure that had nothing to do with my non-roughed-up nipples), we were breastfeeding without problems by week 9. still going strong at 10 months tomorrow! so there, doc! pffffffffft!


----------



## modestmothering (Dec 15, 2011)

These are startling and insightful!

I haven't nursed before but I am looking forward to nursing with my first child once s/he is born. I plan on nursing for 2 years, or when the child weans naturally. Some of these comments are enlightening. Wow. Thanks for sharing!


----------



## chel (Jul 24, 2004)

My father, that grew up near dairy farms, told me that I needed to wean as the cows needed humans to drink their milk or they will explode!


----------



## Katielady (Nov 3, 2006)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *chel*
> 
> My father, that grew up near dairy farms, told me that I needed to wean as the cows needed humans to drink their milk or they will explode!


























awesome.


----------



## nstewart (Nov 6, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *cat13*
> 
> I was told to "rough up" my nipples while I was pregnant to get them used to being nursed on. I guess that kind of advice was pretty common in my mother's generation.


My mom told me this one as well. Luckily, my Doula had told me it was an old wive's tale (and I had read "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding"). I was fortunate to that DS had a good latch from day 1, and I never had any pain with BFing. When I told some friends (who had had babies within a month of DS) that it never hurt to nurse, one of them looked at me and said "What kinky things was your husband *doing* to your nipples before you had D"?


----------



## cat13 (Dec 8, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *bookwise*
> 
> same here! my ob said it right in the middle of examining me during one of monthly pregnancy visits - she grabbed one of my nipples and, i don't know any other words, kinda *plucked* at it and then *kneaded* it, like bread.. and then did it again. i was shocked and embarrassed. the next month, i asked her not to do that, a bit shyly, but still please don't do that. she did it again, laughing me off.
> 
> i switched obs that week, had my homebirth baby a few months later, and besides the normal adjustments one makes when first breastfeeding (yeah, it hurt a little! but i'm sure that had nothing to do with my non-roughed-up nipples), we were breastfeeding without problems by week 9. still going strong at 10 months tomorrow! so there, doc! pffffffffft!


*shivers* Even after you asked her not to touch you like that, she laughed and continued... yuck! I'm so glad you found a new care provider, and congrats on 10 months and counting!


----------



## Alphaghetti (May 26, 2005)

Yipes! I was also told to rough up my nipples.

My kids are all older now, but in conversation the other day, my sister in law told me that her ex's son was gay now, and no wonder. His mother breastfed him until he was four. I assured her that one had nothing to do with the other. She balked, and another of our friends chimed in, saying that it was well known that breastfeeding boys causes homosexuality.

Oh boy.


----------



## monkeyscience (Feb 5, 2008)

Wow... SIL will be upset to find out my brother is gay because he was BF'd. Especially since she's BFing their twin boys!


----------



## GoddessKristie (Oct 31, 2006)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Alphaghetti*
> 
> Yipes! I was also told to rough up my nipples.
> 
> ...


HA!









How did our species reproduce before we invented bottles!? Every man on earth must have been gay! How horrible that they were all forced to reproduce with women just to continue the species...


----------



## mareseatoats (Mar 4, 2011)

My little guy was 10 lbs 4 oz at birth and by day three was back at his birth weight (thank you placenta smoothie!) and at 5.5 months he's a healthy 25lbs. When people find out he's EBF I sometimes get "Are you sure he's getting enough?". My biceps say yes.


----------



## baileyb (Dec 22, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *cat13*
> 
> I was told to "rough up" my nipples while I was pregnant to get them used to being nursed on. I guess that kind of advice was pretty common in my mother's generation.


My husband's customer told him to tell that "advice" too. I was like, "I-don't-think-so..."


----------



## baileyb (Dec 22, 2010)

I had a baby shower when DD was *8 weeks* old and I went into another room with an arm chair to nurse and my husband's aunt looked at me and said, "you are *still* nursing her?"










Ummmm.....*YES!!!!!*


----------



## nstewart (Nov 6, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *mareseatoats*
> 
> My little guy was 10 lbs 4 oz at birth and by day three was back at his birth weight (thank you placenta smoothie!) and at 5.5 months he's a healthy 25lbs. When people find out he's EBF I sometimes get "Are you sure he's getting enough?". My biceps say yes.


So funny that with big babies people are always concerned that they aren't getting enough with EBF...If you didn't have enough milk, he wouldn't have gotten to that size in the first place!

Mamma, you must be making cream!







My DS is 19 mos and weighs 24lbs! lol.


----------



## mt_gooseberry (Jun 25, 2010)

Just last night DH "informed" me that breastmilk was very nutritious...for the first year. But after that it somehow looses it's nutritious value?
















DD's pediatrician told me it was critical that I stop bfing when I let her know I was pg...and I listened.







I weaned her at 12mo, 2wks.

SIL stopped bfing at 1wk because she said her son "didn't like her milk."


----------



## pickle18 (Jan 27, 2012)

Katielady and blackbird2 - your stories cracked me up!!! I was also told to cut the middle of the night feedings because "he doesn't need it" - wonder if the ped would appreciate me coming in and taking half his lunch away because he really doesn't "need" it! I think I'll let my babe be the judge of that, thanks









It was also hilarious because starting at 4 months they started giving us the list of solids to start...and every two months, still hadn't started a single one! Now, at 10 months, he dabbles in a few bites here and there but that's it. DS was always a super chunk so there was little to argue about - actually, a couple ladies at church said he must be breastfed because he was so big!









I can completely relate to the sadness over misinformation...my own mother only breastfed my sister and I for 3 months - she said I was "colicky" and spitting up alot - the doctors told her to switch me to formula, then to soy, etc. When DS was a few months old, he was having trouble with reflux, diarrhea, intestinal issues of all sorts and even breathing problems at night - the doctors advised propping up his bassinet mattress, gave him nasty liquid Zantac and nothing helped. I almost gave up and switched to formula, just like my mom.

Turns out, after a little research, I had foremilk/hindmilk imbalance and overactive let down issues. I was producing so much milk that switching breasts as often as they told me to (every 15 min.) was still only filling his tiny tummy with foremilk - all the sugar, but none of the substance. He would nurse more because he was in pain, contributing to more oversupply. Block feeding (one breast for hours, if needed, until empty) and co-sleeping COMPLETELY solved our problems!

So that was a long story to say, my mom realized she likely had the same issues and gave up due to bad advice.







Meanwhile, DS and I are going strong @ 10 months!


----------



## amautik (Nov 23, 2011)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *azhie*
> 
> Relatives and friends looked pointedly at my chest and said, "You won't have enough milk. Chinese women rarely have enough milk."


I heard the opposite! People would look at my breasts when I was pregnant and joke "well, you're going to make lots and lots of milk, aren't you?" I swear, suddenly my boobs were a big point of conversation (and I wasn't even breastfeeding yet, so it's not like they saw me feeding a baby and made that comment).

Quote:



> Originally Posted by *dakotablue*
> 
> I'm sorry,
> 
> ...


My grandmother was a public health nurse and a BIG advocate of breastfeeding when it wasn't popular (and she still is a huge advocate...I'm lucky to have so many men and women in my family who are strong breastfeeding supporters), but when my dad (her youngest) was born, she was told not to breastfeed him because of an infection she had and the doctor told her that she couldn't feed him. She didn't, and STILL talks about how bad she feels about it. Now, I don't know exactly what the issue was, but I'm betting she probably could have still breastfed my dad. But she really had it drilled into her head that the doctor knows best, and you can't contradict the doctor, must follow his orders, and did exactly what she was told to do. So I know how you feel! And yeah, your grandmother probably would feel bad. Mine does, 50 years later!

And like a few other people on this thread, I got the "You're still making enough milk?!" comment, probably at about four weeks or so. DD is off the charts for her weight, and has been pretty much as soon as she started gaining weight...I think she's getting enough.


----------



## kiramadera (Jun 17, 2009)

If he can ask for it, you need to wean.

Like he hasn't been asking for the boob since day 1??


----------



## babymamaround1 (Oct 18, 2011)

my baby girl is 6 weeks old and very refluxy. was told by a woman in a cafe that its cuz my nipple must be too big for the baby's mouth so she s not latching on properly.







ummm seriously? she must be imagining one monster of a nipple.


----------



## moonheart (Feb 23, 2011)

My husbands grandmother ( who formula fed all 7of her kids) got into an argument with me when my daughter was 3 months about how inappropriate it was to nurse her in public. I defended my right to feed my newborn where ever and when ever ( I usually just closed my mouth when she told me something stupid, trying to be respectful) and I didn't back down, no matter how many times or different ways she tried to say it. She finally ended up banging her fists on the table, screaming "it's just like having sex in public!".







I really had no response, I just shook my head and continued nursing my baby.


----------



## amymccabe (Oct 31, 2010)

When my son was 5 months old, I had a number of people inform me that I would "dry up" at six months and to enjoy that last month while I can. It is impossible to breastfeed past 6 months. My son still nurses now, at 17 months. Not sure what though since my milk dried up 11 months ago, right? 

My parents are bitterly divorced and one day my father critisized my mother for nursing me a little over a year. I told him I planned on nursing my son for at least two years. He kind of sputtered, then told me I can't because it would make my son too attached to me! Funny thing about my father is that he also took issue with my son sleeping in the same room, but he's raising my nephew and, at two years old, he still sleeps in their room. (My stepmom is awesomely supportive of these things and trumps him on such issues...you'd think after raising 8 children by two women that share attachment-style parenting that he'd know better at this point.)

My son's initial ped didn't understand at first that he was solely breastfeed. At around 2 months we were in for a wellness visit and my son was very fuss. The ped kept asking that I give him a pacifier or a bottle. I kept telling him I didn't have any, he was only breastfed. He left the room to get something and when he came back, I was nursing. He excused himself and gave us a little time to finish. When he returned, he was shocked and delighted. He had finially got it that we weren't using bottles or pacifiers! He was utterly delighted and supportive, but it was really sad that he have never in his years of practice came across a baby that solely nursed at 2 months.


----------



## celeste kp (Aug 11, 2011)

I haven't gotten too many,but the few I've had were trying ti tell me that my less than 1 month old should be on a 3 hour schedule. I asked-who is going to explain this to my son,that he will have to wait 3 hours to "eat" again? Also,the nurse,on the last visit to our home (I live in Denmark where we have a nurse who visits to check on the baby every few weeks),she tried to explain that to -bf whenever my son wanted it was hard on his system-that for him to be digesting my milk constantly all day was too difficult for him. She said that it would be like if she drank whole milk all day long and had to digest it. So weird, especially since I'm thinking most people are digesting some kind of food all day long-I mean,I certainly don't let myself go hungry because digesting is too hard on my system. Also,to compare a baby drinking mother's milk to an adult drinking cow's milk is so messed up! I thought,how could a medical person think this? But then I read some of your responses and understand more.

Separate comment made to me by that same nurse- she told me I shouldn't let my son sleep in our bed because,in a year,we'll have to fight to get him out of our bed and into his own. I thought,w that argument, then I shouldn't be breastfeeding since I'll have wean him off of that! I'm just so glad I did a lot of research into how I want to raise my son,before he was born,or some of these comments could really mess w me.


----------



## SuzyQ-ME (Mar 15, 2011)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Hymanroth*
> 
> and my husbands sister and mother pleaded with me to pump my milk instead of breastfeed b/c I would have no life and I need to get away. Umm.. I love being with my son  lol


I get subtle versions of this - "I'll give him a bottle while you (sleep, go out, etc)." I work full time. My "life" is when I am with my son.


----------



## celeste kp (Aug 11, 2011)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Alphaghetti*
> 
> Yipes! I was also told to rough up my nipples.
> 
> ...


If this were true,then I would be the proud mother of a wonderful gay boy! haha!

Seeing that, once upon a time, everyone had to be EBF since there were no grocery stores stocked w formula,(AND BFed longer than a few months-most of the time for a number of years,actually) and the human race is still going strong,I'm thinking that BFing does not make boys gay,or else no one would have been getting pregnant all these centuries!


----------



## Carriebird (Feb 16, 2012)

I love this thread! So funny and at the same time very sad.

When pregnant I was asked by my mother how long I planned to BF. I thought she would be shocked if I told her the truth - possibly as long as six years! - so, I simply said I was hoping that it would be at least 12 months. She was still incredulous and exclaimed "but Carrie, you do realize that 12 months is a whole year!!".

When my DD was 4 months old I was stopped, at Costco, by a busybody who felt it her duty to tell me that I should be ashamed of myself for overfeeding my baby and that I should take her immediately to the doctor to see about getting her formula changed. The look on her face was quite gratifying when I informed her that she had never had formula... her roundness was all breastmilk and that she was exactly the size nature intended her to be. It turned into a real feel good moment for me as a man in the same aisle gave me a small cheer and said "you tell her!". The woman took off in a huff.

I've also had lots of comments from my parents about the feeding on demand. Mum was big on the 2 hour schedule and not wanting me to nurse whenever the baby looked for it for fear of spoiling her. I had to insist, on more than one occasion, that she hand me back the baby so I could nurse her!

And because she often spit up after feeding and was so chubby (20lbs at 4mths) they kept pleading with me to feed her less, as she was obviously in pain. I couldn't believe they would say that when this baby very rarely cried or fussed in anyway and was constantly laughing and cooing.


----------



## GoddessKristie (Oct 31, 2006)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *kiramadera*
> 
> If he can ask for it, you need to wean.
> 
> Like he hasn't been asking for the boob since day 1??


YES! I got this A LOT from my mom and sisters. They thought it was ridiculous that my DS could ask for milk and I would still BF him. I always asked what the difference was between crying for it and asking for it and they never really had an answer for that.

I'm hoping that having stuck to my guns the first time, I wont have as many stupid comments and questions the second time around...we'll see.

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Carriebird*
> 
> I love this thread! So funny and at the same time very sad.
> 
> ...


Your baby sounds like an absolute delight! Chubby, round, always laughing and cooing and hardly ever fussing or crying! I don't know how anyone could find anything to complain about!


----------



## AllisonR (May 5, 2006)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *amymccabe*
> 
> My son's initial ped didn't understand at first that he was solely breastfeed. At around 2 months we were in for a wellness visit and my son was very fuss. The ped kept asking that I give him a pacifier or a bottle. I kept telling him I didn't have any, he was only breastfed. He left the room to get something and when he came back, I was nursing. He excused himself and gave us a little time to finish. When he returned, he was shocked and delighted. He had finially got it that we weren't using bottles or pacifiers! He was utterly delighted and supportive, but it was really sad that he have never in his years of practice came across a baby that solely nursed at 2 months.


I find this really sad. My DD never had pacifiers or bottles, luckily most people didn't think we were aliens because of it.

Amazing that the human species has survived the last 4 million years without pacifiers, bottles, even grocery stores. It's only in the last hundred that these things became the "normal" and breastfeeding became the "abnormal" abboration. Scary how fast that happened, isn't it?

I'm really shocked about the woman who said BF in public is the same as sex in public. This is so warped that if she said it to me I'd just stand there in shock with my mouth hanging to the floor.

Also, the gay comment seems to be popular, but makes no sense. Do they mean that breastfeeding is so grotesque that it turns boy babies off to breasts, and therefore women? What about girl babies, would it make them not become lesbian? I mean it is so insane, but I'm really trying to follow this crazy logic, but just can't seem to make the leap. I hope next time someone says that to them, they can ask, because I'd really like to know.


----------



## sere234 (Feb 7, 2009)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *moonheart*
> 
> My husbands grandmother ( who formula fed all 7of her kids) got into an argument with me when my daughter was 3 months about how inappropriate it was to nurse her in public. I defended my right to feed my newborn where ever and when ever ( I usually just closed my mouth when she told me something stupid, trying to be respectful) and I didn't back down, no matter how many times or different ways she tried to say it. She finally ended up banging her fists on the table, screaming "it's just like having sex in public!".
> 
> ...


Oh. My.







I feel for you having such an "interesting" MIL.

And holy crap, what is with so many people out there having crazy opinons on breastfeeding!?! And thinking it is perfectly fine to voice them?!?

I'm thinking a good response for the crazies would be to give them unwanted advice on their eating habits, health, or appearance. Or perhaps just stick with the peaceful approach I've adopted: "Why do you say that?" I've just started giving my public crazies a simple question, asking them to really explain their reasons. Yeah, most can't! But when it comes to healthcare professionals giving rotten advice? No idea. That's just sad!


----------



## nstewart (Nov 6, 2010)

I had to chuckle at the PPs mom who said that baby "didn't like her BM". My mom weaned me at 3 months because "I didn't like nursing". I can see why she thought that. My DS also went through a very distractable stage at about 4 months, which is probably what I was going through, and it was a lot of work to get him to nurse because he was so interested in everything else. We had to lay on the bed or floor in a quiet, dark room every time he had to eat. But we got through that and at 19 months are still going strong.

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *sere234*
> 
> But when it comes to healthcare professionals giving rotten advice? No idea. That's just sad!


Seems like they are often the worst because they feel most entitled to give their opinion and also because as a mom, you feel you should be able to trust what your doctor says! It makes me angry that so many doctors and nurses are so mis-informed.

I realized my doctor didn't know what she was talking about when she discouraged me from BFing DS at night at 3 months because he "needed to consolidate his sleep" and it was bad for him to wake to nurse. She confirmed it for me when we went in for his 6 month check up and she commented that I must have weaned because DS had teeth and obviously







would be biting me if we were still nursing. (I did get niped a few times, but I think that she though you couldn't nurse once baby had teeth!) She was also shocked when I refused to start DS on whole milk at 12 months because he was still nursing. She was worried he "wouldn't get enough fat" from my milk.


----------



## cat13 (Dec 8, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *sere234*
> 
> Oh. My.
> 
> ...


Thank you, this is my new response!


----------



## cristinnicole (Jan 13, 2007)

in the ER with my baby who was probably under one. middle of the night. he was in the Ergo and i was pacing back and forth while nursing him, trying to get him to sleep while in the waiting room. a woman who was in there with her kid said nice and loudly: "breastfeeding in public should be illegal". then she gave me a nice glare. now, here is what she was wearing: shorts that were short enough to be defined as boy-cut underwear and a VERY low-cut shirt with LOTS of cleavage showing. i could see more of her breasts than what she could see of mine! and i at least had the excuse of them being functional!


----------



## pickle18 (Jan 27, 2012)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Hymanroth*
> 
> My FIL once said that I should give him food b/c he is too hungry to be satisfied by BM ... ok.
> 
> and my husbands sister and mother pleaded with me to pump my milk instead of breastfeed b/c I would have no life and I need to get away. Umm.. I love being with my son  lol


I have gotten these alot!! People react as if EBFing is akin to starvation.







But, conversely, feeding on demand is also terrible somehow??? Riddle me that...

AND, like you, everyone is constantly on my case about leaving the baby, friends and family think I am so weird - that because I nurse and don't pump (SAHM) I am some kind of crazy martyr mother - but I don't WANT to 'get away'! I wouldn't have planned him if I wanted to escape him! Anywhere I go better welcome my baby kid, too.







We take him everywhere, in a sling or carrier - I've discreetly breastfed him in his Ergo while giving a talk in front of our church, haha (this especially cracked DH up, as he was the only one who knew). This phase will go by so quickly - I'll take my independence back as he establishes his - naturally.

I've learned to just politely stand my ground - they've tried to put him in the nursery at church with a bottle or pacifier and sent many people to talk to me about it. Now, this is not because he creates any disturbance (if he makes a peep I take him to a back room) - he mostly sleeps or nurses (which nobody even knows he's doing - they always assume he's asleep and want to peek, haha). They just think I'm crazy!!!







After many conversations I've realized they just can't see why I don't want to unload him somewhere...


----------



## mommy212 (Mar 2, 2010)

I haven't gotten the 'it will make your boy ay one.' Instead, I got 'It will make your son and boob man!' I laughed at this... too funny. And really, who cares?







I was also told "Well, you won't be able to do that with a girl or you'll really screw her up!" Implying, it seemed, that she would be a lesbian.


----------



## colorclash (Jul 14, 2009)

I overhead my MIL (who has been supportive of my nursing even at 18 months) tell my uncle that dd is still drinking mothers milk when she was 14 months old. He balked and said, "Still??!????!? It's time to wean her and start giving her the good stuff." I thought I WAS giving her the good stuff.


----------



## Katielady (Nov 3, 2006)

Re the "it's like having sex in public" comment (OMG)...I had someone imply this, if not say it outright. I was at a museum with my son, about 8 months. I sat on a bench with him, intending to nurse as we were about to leave. A woman in her 60s or so sat next to me to rest and struck up a conversation. My son sat on my lap, not nursing yet, just hanging out. She asked if he was breastfed and I said he was, and she immediately set in talking about how her daughter didn't nurse her two kids and felt bad about it and that she kept telling her, "It's a personal choice! It doesn't matter!" I'm sitting there listening, nodding, thinking "I really don't care whether your daughter nursed and why!" I hate it when my breastfeeding is seen, in itself, as some kind of criticism of those who don't. I'm doing my thing, I haven't said a word about you, so leave me be! Anyway, after a while I needed to get that nursing session in before we needed to go so I started to nurse and she got all freaked out, saying, "I'll just go over here while you have your INTIMATE TIME." I gently said not to worry, it was fine, etc. and she got up and walked away, repeating stuff about not wanting to interrupt our PRIVATE INTIMATE TIME." It was so creepy, like she was implying I was doing something sexual with my own kid. Yech!


----------



## RobynHeud (Aug 25, 2011)

My favorite was at my DS 7 month checkup. I was still EBF and the doctor told me I needed to start him on vitamins, especially vitamin D. I replied that he got at least 15 minutes of sum ever day (we live in San Diego. How do you avoid it?) And didn't need a supplement. He then continued to say it was vital since breast milk doesn't have any vitamins. We got out of there as quick as we could and made sure to let the nurses know exactly why we wouldn't be coming back.


----------



## Thing1Thing2 (Apr 30, 2008)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *cat13*
> 
> I was told to "rough up" my nipples while I was pregnant to get them used to being nursed on. I guess that kind of advice was pretty common in my mother's generation.


LOL I was told to brush them with a toothbrush for the same reason!


----------



## cat13 (Dec 8, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Thing1Thing2*
> 
> LOL I was told to brush them with a toothbrush for the same reason!


Plus, it keeps cavities away!


----------



## redheather (Aug 20, 2011)

I was told by a sleep "specialist" (ugh!) that my DD's digestive system would become "over-burdened" and "out-of-whack" by night-nursing, "just like an adult who gets up in the middle of the night to snack!"

She's just about to turn 3, we're still nursing (yes, sometimes at night!!!!!) and the only thing that's really ever made her system go out of whack is stomach flu and cow's milk.

And really, all (or 99%?) of humans were breastfed until the twentieth century....So all those weird arguments are complete hooey.


----------



## ashleyt (Jul 26, 2010)

My very supportive MIL recommended the practice of cutting nipple holes in my bra to let them rub against my shirt or to put small pieces of sandpaper in my bra to rough up my nipples before DS was born. Lol still makes me laugh 2.5 yrs later.


----------



## crystal_buffaloe (Apr 30, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *ashleyt*
> 
> My very supportive MIL recommended the practice of cutting nipple holes in my bra to let them rub against my shirt or to put small pieces of sandpaper in my bra to rough up my nipples before DS was born.


OUCH! I'm glad you can laugh about it! ... Seriously, YYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOWCH!


----------



## youngspiritmom (Mar 5, 2010)

This thread is absolutely hilarious!!! Where do they get these ideas??? My faves:

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *livacreature*
> 
> on the bus, a lady was going on about her daughter planning on breastfeeding and her fears that her grandchild would be MORE INCLINED TO BE A CANNIBAL!


Quote:


> Originally Posted by *chel*
> 
> My father, that grew up near dairy farms, told me that I needed to wean as the cows needed humans to drink their milk or they will explode!












I was told all the classic ones...that breastfeeding after age one will give my son perverted sexual issues, that the art of breastfeeding should have "come naturally," and that I should stop breastfeeding simply because I had trouble with it and had sore nipples.


----------



## Redmom (Jul 26, 2011)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *redheather*
> 
> I was told by a sleep "specialist" (ugh!) that my DD's digestive system would become "over-burdened" and "out-of-whack" by night-nursing, "just like an adult who gets up in the middle of the night to snack!"


"sleep specialist" - double ugh!


----------



## baileyb (Dec 22, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *youngspiritmom*


Hey! I have that statue in your profile pic on my kitchen table!!


----------



## lunarlady (Jan 4, 2010)

My grandmother recently found out I'm still nursing DD2 (18 months). Our conversation went like this:
Her: "You're still nursing her?"
Me: "Yes."
Her: "But doesn't she have teeth?"
Me: "Yes, she is actually cutting her molars now."
Her: "Honey, you have to stop before she bites your nipples clean off!"

She was so very shocked and concerned for my well being. I didn't tell her that I nursed DD1 till age 4 and my nips are still firmly attached.


----------



## Carriebird (Feb 16, 2012)

Quote:


> She asked if he was breastfed and I said he was, and she immediately set in talking about how her daughter didn't nurse her two kids and felt bad about it and that she kept telling her, "It's a personal choice! It doesn't matter!" I'm sitting there listening, nodding, thinking "I really don't care whether your daughter nursed and why!" I hate it when my breastfeeding is seen, in itself, as some kind of criticism of those who don't. I'm doing my thing, I haven't said a word about you, so leave me be! Anyway, after a while I needed to get that nursing session in before we needed to go so I started to nurse and she got all freaked out, saying, "I'll just go over here while you have your INTIMATE TIME."


It's no wonder her daughter decided not to nurse either of hers!


----------



## Thing1Thing2 (Apr 30, 2008)

"Anyway, after a while I needed to get that nursing session in before we needed to go so I started to nurse and she got all freaked out, saying, "I'll just go over here while you have your INTIMATE TIME"

uhhhhmmmm... LOL!!!


----------



## ~Nikki~ (Aug 4, 2004)

After I was having a mild freak-out about how much daycare is going to cost us when I go back to work, my spouse advised me not to let myself get stressed out, because he had heard that stress makes your milk curdle. I kind of laughed at the visual of curdled chunky milk and the logistics of it all.....gross!


----------



## Katielady (Nov 3, 2006)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *~Nikki~*
> 
> After I was having a mild freak-out about how much daycare is going to cost us when I go back to work, my spouse advised me not to let myself get stressed out, because he had heard that stress makes your milk curdle. I kind of laughed at the visual of curdled chunky milk and the logistics of it all.....gross!


Ha! It's fascinating how our consumption of cow milk has affected people's people's perception of how breastfeeding works. People are way more familiar with dairy than with breastfeeding and so they project dairy concepts onto nursing. Our boobs are not little refrigerators holding pints of milk that can spoil- they are PRODUCING the milk, fresh every time.

I had a pediatrician, who I chose because she was a trained LC (not an IBCLC mind you), tell me to stop nursing when my son had rotavirus at 8 months. She was lumping breastfeeding in with the no dairy rule for stomach virus. I trusted her so I pumped for half a day and gave him droppers of pedialyte as she'd suggested. But it felt wrong to me and I started nursing again, and he kept that down WAY better than the sugary artificial crap I'd been advised to give him. Even trained professionals often don't realize the vast, vast difference between cows' milk and human milk. So much education is needed!


----------



## ~Nikki~ (Aug 4, 2004)

That's nuts! I've been told that breastmilk is considered a "clear fluid" and can/should be offered to them when they're sick. Anytime I've had a sick baby, breastmilk has made them feel better. Heck, I remember after my son had weaned, about a week later he came down with a nasty flu bug. I offered the breast and within hours he was feeling better. That was the very last time he nursed.


----------



## awritermom (Feb 27, 2012)

When my ds1 was five months old, I was visiting my parents. My step dad asked me "when are you going to stop nursing him?" (I planned on going for at least a year and then for as long after as it felt right.) I said, "I'm not sure. We'll see." He said, "Well, you're going to have to let him grow up sometime!" Okay, yeah, he's five months old...I better worry that he's too immature and start making sure he "grows up!" LOL!

Stepdad also objected to carseats ("I never used one and I am fine.") and booster seats ("Why don't you just make him live in a bubble!").

I ended up nursing ds1 until he was four. Still nursing ds2 (21 months) and no comments from stepdad yet. Guess over the years some of my comments must have sunk in a bit. Or maybe my homeschooling takes up all the worry-space in his mind now. ;-)


----------



## baileyb (Dec 22, 2010)

lol on the homeschooling comment, awritermom! My IL don't know we are going to homeschool and made some comment about another family and the whole typical "socialize" thing...oh well he'll find out eventually.


----------



## Mama Ana (Jun 12, 2011)

omg some of these are just too funny!

I recently read, and I don't know if it is true, I have never heard anything about it. But I was recently looking up cold medications that are okay to take while nursing. One comment I came across said that if YOU, the mother, have flu like symptoms to stop breastfeeding til you feel better. That can't be right can it? I know nursing while sick is a huge PITA because all you wanna do is sleep but too stop all together?

Anyway, my other story is similar to a lot of you. When my daughter was born my MIL and I were talking about nursing. She nursed my DH til he was 14 months and she said that was enough as it got "weird". She said that nursing into toddler who was weird in general and shouldn't be done. Me, being on a hormone high and in a persnickety mood said, "Well I'm going to nurse until Chloe (DD) self-weans, be it one year or three years." That shut her up for a few days.


----------



## ShyingViolet (Oct 23, 2011)

NO! It's so completely not true that you have to stop breastfeeding if you get sick! AHHHH I'm so sick of people being told this! Breastmilk has awesome white blood cells and antibodies to whatever you're sick with that will pass to your baby and help protect them from getting sick too. Guhhh. Sorry, that's just like the fifth time in a month when I've heard someone mention being told this. So wrong.

Plus, can you imagine having the flu and also having painful milky boobs? Sheesh. I had a doctor tell me this once and it just made me so mad.

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Mama Ana*
> 
> omg some of these are just too funny!
> 
> ...


----------



## lovepickles (Nov 16, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *bookwise*
> 
> same here! my ob said it right in the middle of examining me during one of monthly pregnancy visits - she grabbed one of my nipples and, i don't know any other words, kinda *plucked* at it and then *kneaded* it, like bread.. and then did it again. i was shocked and embarrassed. the next month, i asked her not to do that, a bit shyly, but still please don't do that. she did it again, laughing me off.
> 
> i switched obs that week, had my homebirth baby a few months later, and besides the normal adjustments one makes when first breastfeeding (yeah, it hurt a little! but i'm sure that had nothing to do with my non-roughed-up nipples), we were breastfeeding without problems by week 9. still going strong at 10 months tomorrow! so there, doc! pffffffffft!


This is highly inappropriate behavior. Even if you asked "shyly" your request not to be touched in this way should have been respected. This OB should be reported for misconduct. I had a similar experience with my ob that I won't go into here but if you ask a doc not to touch you and they do it is wrong, very wrong.


----------



## Mama Ana (Jun 12, 2011)

That's what I thought! The hassle of pumping for me would be a bigger PITA than nursing a squirmy 7 month old right now! And if I even *talk about plugged ducts I get them so to stop nursing would a recipe for disaster.

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *ShyingViolet*
> 
> NO! It's so completely not true that you have to stop breastfeeding if you get sick! AHHHH I'm so sick of people being told this! Breastmilk has awesome white blood cells and antibodies to whatever you're sick with that will pass to your baby and help protect them from getting sick too. Guhhh. Sorry, that's just like the fifth time in a month when I've heard someone mention being told this. So wrong.
> 
> Plus, can you imagine having the flu and also having painful milky boobs? Sheesh. I had a doctor tell me this once and it just made me so mad.


----------



## ~adorkable~ (Nov 7, 2007)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *bookwise*
> same here! my ob said it right in the middle of examining me during one of monthly pregnancy visits - she grabbed one of my nipples and, i don't know any other words, kinda *plucked* at it and then *kneaded* it, like bread.. and then did it again. i was shocked and embarrassed. the next month, i asked her not to do that, a bit shyly, but still please don't do that. she did it again, laughing me off.


i would have straight up smacked her the second time she did this, or better yet just grabbed her boob! thats what i did when i was preggo to anyone that touched my belly, i grabbed theirs.

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *nstewart*
> When I told some friends (who had had babies within a month of DS) that it never hurt to nurse, one of them looked at me and said "What kinky things was your husband *doing* to your nipples before you had D"?


its so interesting that folks think it has to hurt and other think it is ever hurts something is terribly wrong when the truth it is always a huge range. mine never hurt past the first day shock of how strong the suck was. and when i told another mom that once she asked " then are you sure you are making any milk?" this was in front of my two EBF twins that had somehow survived to about 5 months at that point!

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *mareseatoats*
> 
> My little guy was 10 lbs 4 oz at birth and by day three was back at his birth weight (thank you placenta smoothie!) and at 5.5 months he's a healthy 25lbs. When people find out he's EBF I sometimes get "Are you sure he's getting enough?". My biceps say yes.


yeah how is it that when babies drink so much milk that they grow huge that folks immediately think that milk is not enough for them????? how did they get that big in the first place??!

i had 2 differnect super pro breastfeeding midwives tell me that my milk lost a lot of its nutritional value after one year or so and became more like water. thankfully i looked it up and the science disproves that big time


----------



## nstewart (Nov 6, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *~Adorkable~*
> 
> i had 2 differnect super pro breastfeeding midwives tell me that my milk lost a lot of its nutritional value after one year or so and became more like water. thankfully i looked it up and the science disproves that big time


Thanks for this link! I knew this (thanks to MDC!!) but didn't ever have the actual data to back it up! Think I'll provide a copy to my doctor, since she clearly needs some info on BFing given that she tried to convince me to switch DS to cows milk at 9 mos and then again at a year.


----------



## Gavodir (Jun 26, 2012)

Sorry for what may be a rude first post and I actually registered just to say this but I had what I found to be a humorous notion in relevance to the "roughing up" your nipples suggestion...

Should you also start fisting in preparation to give birth?


----------



## Quinalla (May 23, 2005)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *strawberryprincess*
> 
> When my first was born, my mother was adamant that new mothers needed to drink plenty of milk so that they could make milk. At first I thought this was logical, but as I thought about it, I've never seen a lactating cow drink milk, and they make lots!


My Mom made some offhand comment when she visited if I was drinking plenty of milk since I was breastfeeding. I think I made some kind of "Huh?" response as I was pretty sleep deprived and she covered like she meant that the calcium and what not was good for me. So I think she knew once she thought about it that it didn't really make sense, but it was amusing.

And not a comment, but when I explained to my DH that the milk comes out of a bunch of different holes on the nipple, not just one as a lot of non-saavy BFing folks think (me included once upon a time) his face was priceless









I never got the comment said to me, but around me that "Babies should stop nursing when they can ask for it." which I always quip back with now that crying is how infants ask for it, some learn signs very early, etc. etc. so when is the proper time to stop nursing again?

Luckily strange comments were rare and everyone around me was so supportive. Even of pumping at work which can really weird some folks out, honestly it was weird to me at first!


----------



## motherhendoula (Feb 13, 2009)

My mother told me the same thing when i was pregnant! "You have to drink milk to make milk!" i dutifully obeyed...although i detest milk and always have - i chugged a glass of skim down once a day for about two weeks when it suddenly dawned on me...i grew up around dairy farms.....i dont remember ever seeing the cows drinking from one another!


----------



## pek64 (Apr 8, 2012)

I saw this under Recent Discussions and had to respond, even though my son is 16 and weaned many years ago!

My parents once took me aside when we were visiting them, and my son was just a baby. They wanted to talk about how I was feeding him. They wanted me to give him formula because "This thing you do; it's just not natural!".

I was so surprised, I burst out laughing! Bad move, since my father was very sensitive to being laughed at, but that's another story.


----------



## ShyingViolet (Oct 23, 2011)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *pek64*
> 
> I saw this under Recent Discussions and had to respond, even though my son is 16 and weaned many years ago!
> My parents once took me aside when we were visiting them, and my son was just a baby. They wanted to talk about how I was feeding him. They wanted me to give him formula because "This thing you do; it's just not natural!".
> I was so surprised, I burst out laughing! Bad move, since my father was very sensitive to being laughed at, but that's another story.


Good for you for being able to laugh it off! I'm super sensitive, so if my parents had said something like that to me when my baby was small I probably would have burst into tears.


----------



## ZoeStarshine (May 9, 2012)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *awritermom*
> 
> I ended up nursing ds1 until he was four. Still nursing ds2 (21 months) and no comments from stepdad yet. Guess over the years some of my comments must have sunk in a bit. Or maybe my homeschooling takes up all the worry-space in his mind now. ;-)


UGH, that's one of my issues with my dad right now. He made some comment the other day about "I guess that'll never happen [some bad thing on the television] to her, since you won't be letting her out of your sight." Like, uhhh...dad, seriously? I already explained that's not how homeschooling works (for us).

On our most recent visit, I was trying to nurse discreetly in the living room (despite the fact that my stepmom kept unsubtly hinting that I was making my dad and husband uncomfortable) and she suddenly asked, "Why don't you give her some water?" I explained in the friendliest way possible that breastfed babies don't need water, even in the desert, isn't that cool? Not two hours later, as I was nursing babygirl again, relegated to their bedroom, she said, "Can't you just give her some juice?" My daughter is 3 *weeks old*. Then again, she fed my youngest brother (10 years old now) solids at 3 months because she believes he is a "super baby" and she started spanking my middle brother at 8 months.


----------



## CheriK (Mar 18, 2003)

I heard the must toughen your nipples advice, too, when pregnant 11 years ago. Also heard lots of "you can't breastfeed twins."

The ones that make me most upset are the completely inaccurate comments from doctors.

DD had anesthesia at 16 months to open a blocked tear duct and I was told by the ophthamologist that she had to fast for 12 hours prior, including breastmilk. This for a child who hadn't gone more than 2 hours without nursing since birth. To his credit, when I presented him with lots of research contraindicating the need to fast from breastfeeding, he readily agreed. At least he was willing to learn.

When my twins were 2, eating some solids but still getting the majority of their calories from nursing, our doctor told me that my milk didn't "count" any more and that they needed at least 24 oz of cow's milk a day for calcium. WOW. 24 oz?!?! I never calculated the calories out, but I'm fairly certain that would be more than the total calories they consumed (besides my milk) in a day. That same day she insisted on testing their iron because they "must" be anemic. She didn't even have the courtesy to come back into the room and tell me herself that their levels were fine, she sent her assistant. That was the last straw w/ this doctor.

As my twins approached a year and beyond & were still nursing, I also got lots of "Oh, I could never keep doing THAT for SOO long" types of comments, like I was some sort of martyr sacrificing myself to breastfeed. No, actually, breastfeeding makes my life easier. They fall asleep quickly, they don't have tantrums, I never have to worry about not having a snack available. . .

My mom, who is a wonderful Grandma and has always supported my non-mainstream choices (she told me when I planned on having my 3rd at home that she didn't blame me because hospitals are horrible places . . . this from a woman who was a nurse), one time made some offhand comment that if I was still nursing when my twins were over a year, she wouldn't go out in public with me any more. I was so shocked to hear that from her and immediately called her on it. She now claims she never said that.

I'm so lucky to be surrounded by mom friends who also believe that breastfeeding until a child weans on their own, bedsharing for years, babywearing, etc. is just normal that it is now shocking to me when someone asks if my 3-year old (4 in Nov) is still nursing.


----------



## tm0sweet (Sep 28, 2012)

I know this is an old thread, but I'm still fuming about this so I had to contribute. I was just told at my sons 1 month appt that he is over weight because he's gained 4 pounds since birth and I need to nurse him less. "stretch it out to every 3 hours" he's 97th percentile in height AND weight. He was born on the larger side and I nurse on demand! I wanted to tell the doctor "ok but when he's screaming cuz he's hungry before your 3 hours are up, I'm dropping him off with you!"

Oh, and when I was pregnant with my first and my grandma found out I wasn't planning on pumping she told me I was selfish because DH needed a chance to feed his baby too. To her credit, she has since confessed she is guilty that she listened to docs at the time and didn't nurse her 5 kids, and she is incredibly supportive of breast feeding.


----------



## monkeyscience (Feb 5, 2008)

Oh wow... I would be finding a new doctor if they told me a 1-month-old was overweight - even if he was formula fed! I just don't think it's possible for a baby that age to overeat, especially with such tiny and relatively inelastic tummies!


----------



## pek64 (Apr 8, 2012)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *tm0sweet*
> 
> I know this is an old thread, but I'm still fuming about this so I had to contribute. I was just told at my sons 1 month appt that he is over weight because he's gained 4 pounds since birth and I need to nurse him less. "stretch it out to every 3 hours" he's 97th percentile in height AND weight. He was born on the larger side and I nurse on demand! I wanted to tell the doctor "ok but when he's screaming cuz he's hungry before your 3 hours are up, I'm dropping him off with you!"
> 
> Oh, and when I was pregnant with my first and my grandma found out I wasn't planning on pumping she told me I was selfish because DH needed a chance to feed his baby too. To her credit, she has since confessed she is guilty that she listened to docs at the time and didn't nurse her 5 kids, and she is incredibly supportive of breast feeding.


Sorry you were told that, but good for you for telling him off silently!! You know the truth, and he's a fool (at least where breastfeeding is concerned).


----------



## motherhendoula (Feb 13, 2009)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *tm0sweet*
> 
> I know this is an old thread, but I'm still fuming about this so I had to contribute. I was just told at my sons 1 month appt that he is over weight because he's gained 4 pounds since birth and I need to nurse him less. "stretch it out to every 3 hours" he's 97th percentile in height AND weight. He was born on the larger side and I nurse on demand! I wanted to tell the doctor "ok but when he's screaming cuz he's hungry before your 3 hours are up, I'm dropping him off with you!"
> 
> Oh, and when I was pregnant with my first and my grandma found out I wasn't planning on pumping she told me I was selfish because DH needed a chance to feed his baby too. To her credit, she has since confessed she is guilty that she listened to docs at the time and didn't nurse her 5 kids, and she is incredibly supportive of breast feeding.


now you have me fuming! MOST pediatricians...most people in general would give you a pat on the back and say "GOOD JOB!!" - not all EBF babies gain much weight at all in their first month - it takes time to get the nursing relationship working well.....4 lbs is a great accomplishment!.


----------



## RobynHeud (Aug 25, 2011)

Oh, can we please do away with the growth charts? My first went from 6 lbs at birth to 18 lbs at 4 months, just on breast milk, and the docs were freaking out that he was gaining too fast and he was too tall. Then, when his weight gain tapered, and he only gained 5 lbs over the next eight months they were still freaking out. Now with my second, who is shorter and a little stockier than the first, my husband was told at his one-year appt that he was too short. Short of malnutrition, there's not much that parents can do to affect how tall a child grows. And if the docs can't handle not having growth charts, can we at least get updated ones that reflect normal growth of an EBF infant?


----------



## EchoSoul (Jan 24, 2011)

I was told by my mother in law that I had to essentially "sterilize" my breasts as one would bottle nipples. That I had to use soap to wash my breasts off after every feeding, because she saw our son developing acne on his face, flipped out, and said it was from not washing my breasts off after every time he fed.


----------

