# Help! My baby refuses to be worn in a carrier.



## magnoliasmama (Sep 8, 2008)

Our high maintenance three month old will not be worn. She's hated the sling since we first put her in it at two weeks old. I've tried a Maya, The New Native, and a Baby Bjorn. We are thinking about buying an Ergo, but I'm hesitant considering our track record (and the higher price of Ergos). We have had the best luck with the Baby Bjorn. She tolerates it for about a half an hour or so. Our baby is super grumpy all the time and I've read about the benefits of wearing high maintenance babies. I just can't seem to get mine used to being worn.

I get so jealous when I see mamas with their peacefully sleeping babes in a sling.

Has anyone out there overcome this problem?


----------



## Devaskyla (Oct 5, 2003)

Have you tried a wrap? You could buy a long piece of cheapish fabric and try it to see if that would work. Or an Ergo might. Lots of babies don't like being in a cradle hold...maybe a carrier where she can be more upright would make her happier?

In addition to a different position, some babies just need to be worn for a little bit to get used to it. Have you tried going out for a walk with her, even if she's grumpy? (I know, you probably have, just wanted to throw that out as a suggestion jic)


----------



## hrsmom (Jul 4, 2008)

My LO was ok in the Moby wrap (great in the Moby wrap, actually!) for doing things like taking the dogs for a walk (moving around in other words) and while grocery shopping, but otherwise she didn't like being in a wrap or carrier that much until she was about 4 months old. I had the Ergo from when she was newborn, but it didn't work that well for us again until she was about 4 months old. She was ok if I put her in the wrap when she was fed, rested, and clean and dry. (A moving target for a small baby, for sure!) Also, when she became hungry or needed to pee or poop, she wanted out. She did fall asleep in it, but for everything else wanted out. She liked the Ergo once she was big enough to not be in it sideways. (She didn't like it sideways with the infant insert.) I'd look into a wrap of some kind, as previously suggested. And I do really really like our Ergo now, but not when she was 3 month old.


----------



## lilylove (Apr 10, 2003)

I agree with trying a do it yourself wrap. You have alot of versatility and don't have to worry about investing a ton of money. Some babies seem to like one type of carrier (or carry) only and it's a matter of finding what works for you both.
Another option is buying a used carrier like a Mei Tai.


----------



## Reg1123 (May 19, 2008)

My son was the same way at first. We have had a LOT of luck with the Moby. But when he wants out, he WANTS out. And he's not afraid to let us know about it!


----------



## Walkup25 (Jan 8, 2006)

Go for a wrap, sling, etc. that is made for DD based on how she is most comfortable when you hold her. I know 3 months was a hard time for me to sling my DS because he wanted to see what all was going on, but couldn't quite hold his head up yet.

Good luck!


----------



## lovemybabies924 (Aug 8, 2008)

my son was the same way but i just kept putting him in it untill finally he liked it lol


----------



## nigellas (Jun 18, 2006)

I think it might be the carrier. The Bjorn can be uncomfortable for some babies, so I'm guessing that is what the issue is with that one. And the Maya and NN - Are you putting you baby in the traditional cradle hold? Many babies HATE this position.
I second (third?) the Moby wrap suggestion. It's very affordable and you will be able to hold your baby in an upright position.

Also, when you get her in walk, walk and walk. You can't just pop her in and stand still. You definitely need motion to get them settled.


----------



## cotopaxi (Sep 17, 2007)

Three months can be a hard time - they want to be able to see everything but they don't have enough head control for certain positions.

Sounds like she likes being upright and being able to see out, so I'd look at carriers that will allow that position. One carry to consider is a back carry, so she can see everything that's happening.

An SSC like Ergo is an option, or a mei tai like Babyhawk, or a wrap, like pp mentioned, which you can just DIY with some cloth while you're still experimenting. Wraps take a little more patience and practice at first, so it depends how much time you are willing to play with it.

Consider buying used since you're not sure what will work - the fsot at thebabywearer often has great deals on nearly new carriers.


----------



## kohlby (Dec 5, 2005)

I had to teach my son to like a sling. For the wrap, I taught him by putting him in it and then breastfeeding him, then I took him out. I did this several days in a row and he soon was comfortable in it. He was younger than 3 months though. At 3 months, we did a kangaroo pouch type hold in the Maya. But I had him looking toward me despite good neck control since he wanted to see me 24/7.


----------



## _betsy_ (Jun 29, 2004)

3 months is such a hard time for most babies - growth spurt, sleep changes, all sorts of developmental things going on even if you can't see it as easily as when they learn to roll, crawl, sit, walk, etc.

My High Needs baby LOVED the sling - we had a simple pouch and it would instantly make her happy. I almost always used the upright position, tummy to tummy, until she was big enough to ride facing outward - then she REALLY loved it! I used a Kangaroo Korner Adjustable Fleece Pouch and a really pretty stretch pink floral from www.slinglings.com - loved it so much DH got a pouch and so did my friend with a baby the same age!


----------



## pixiepunk (Mar 11, 2003)

what carries have you tried with your Maya Wrap? if you're only doing the cradle hold, you should experiment with other carries that she might like better. www.zolowear.com has awesome videos and picture tutorials of a million and one different ways to use a ring sling. very very helpful. at that age most of my kids like facing out sitting with their legs crossed or tummy-to-tummy in a ring sling.

regarding the Ergo, how big is your baby? mine was fine in a SSC at 3 months, but she's gigantic. most babies at that age are probably too small. what about a mei tai? you can usually get a kozy or babyhawk for easily half or more of what a new ergo would cost. and since they are constructed very similarly (just with tied straps instead of buckles, and a no waist padding in the MT) you will know if she's going to enjoy that style of carrier before springing for the ergo.


----------



## magnoliasmama (Sep 8, 2008)

Thank you everyone for all the wonderful advice. I traded my New Native for a Moby and the baby really likes it. She can look outwards without any pressure on her gassy tummy and she feels more secure than in a ring sling. For now I think we are both happy. I can't wait til she is old enough to strap on my back.







:


----------

