# Very Angry 3 1/2 year old... Please help



## talktomenow

I need some serious help with my almost 3 1/2 yr old. I feel like I just can't do it anymore. I feel like she just has so much rage and I don't know what to do about it or where it came from. It's been a lot worse the past few weeks. She hits, kicks, bites, head butts, twists and pulls my nipples, etc... she calls me a bitch, bad... pretty much any "bad" word she can think of; attacks her baby sister, destroys things, etc. If I put her in her room when I feel like she is just out of control (ie, won't stop trying to come at me or dd2 to hurt us), she pees or poops in her room (on purpose) or destroys something in there. I don't know what to do with her anymore.

I try not to loose my temper, but I do sometimes. I try to tell her that we don't use those words, we don't hit in this family... I try to hug her and comfort her and remind her it's okay to feel that way. I try to listen actively and encourage her to tell me how she feels. I tell her it's okay to want to hit your sister, it's okay to wish she was gone, etc, but we don't actually hit her. I give her ideas for redirecting her anger: hitting her pillow, yelling, etc. We have special breathes that we do together to let out the anger and breathe in the calm. None of it works!!!

Dh and I are not perfect, but I don't think we are so bad as to cause this... We do yell sometimes, and I know I push her off me too roughly sometimes when she is "attacking"... We never hit. We don't call her names or shame her. We try not to even do time out. But I feel like GD is not working at all. I'm losing it more and more with her. Is there anything I can do??









Btw, when I "lose it", for me that means grabbing her by the arms and saying, "What is wrong with you?!" Or something like that. I've also found myself more and more telling her that the way she treats us does not make us want to play games with her, read books to her, etc, because we feel sad that she hurts us. We don't want to play with people who treat us that way. (This is right after she gets really upset and then wants to change immediately and play). I feel like this is manipulative and inappropriate, but I'm just so lost...


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## delighted.mama

OMG! You took the words right out of my mouth!! I was just about to post a similar reply. I am losing it with my 3 1/2 year old too. GD has worked so well for us, but lately I find myself starting to use harsher methods, such as yelling, making her sit in time out and yanking her. She makes me so mad with her antics. All day today she has been saying "stupid" this and "stupid" that. We talked about it and decided to set up a reward chart for not saying the word. Well, it lasted about 1 hour. Just a little while ago, we were outside and she was swinging DD2 (10 1/2 months old) and DD2 was getting scared. I asked her several times NOT to do it. I told her I needed her help with something. She was so determined. I guess that's what really bugs me. When she decides she's going to do something, she'll just plow ahead until things get ugly. Anyway, without getting mad, I took dd2 out of the swing and told her I was taking her in the house. DD1 called me stupid and ran after me and hit me!!







:







I grabbed her hand and started to take her in the house but then released her as she started freaking out. I made her sit in the "quiet chair" for 5 minutes and then I talked to her.

For the last several months I have been so frustrated with her. Half the time I am amused by her and the other half she drives me crazy. Everything has the potential of turning into a battle. Even if I diffuse it, she has now gotten to the point of being sassy and talking back to me. IT makes me SOOOO mad!







What's with this age!!

ARGHGHGH! It just happened again. As I was writing this message, she got into the dd2's playpen and was making her cry. Now she is screaming and me and telling me that I am acting "stupid" What to do....What to do...what to do.....

Libby


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## delighted.mama

mabelsmama, sorry, I didn't mean to hijack your thread. It's just that the emotions are running really high right now and I felt relieved that someone else is going through similar things. I hope someone who has more experience can let us know, WHAT DO WE DO NOW? **Hugs** to you for now......Hopefully it won't last too long.....


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## mamazee

I have a 3-1/2 year old too. I'd heard it was possibly the hardest age. It's as far as I've gotten so far but it does have challenges.

What do I do? I tell her, "I don't talk to you like that. Please don't talk to me like that." Of course, if I get short with her she says, "Mommy, I don't talk to you like that . . ." but I guess that's preferable. When she hits I say, "I don't hit you and please don't hit me." If I need to, I move away where she can't get at me to protect myself. I don't know what else to do. It might just be a stage they go through and we have to live through.

Oh, I also say stuff like, "It's OK to be angry but it isn't OK to hit." That kind of thing. I'm not sure where I read that phrase but I got it from a book.

I have this feeling that the less angry I get with her, the less it will escalate, but I'm not sure if that's helping. I do try to stay as calm as I can, but I don't pretend that it's peachy-keen either. Sometimes I just disengage and let daddy deal with it. He isn't with her all day so in the evening sometimes his patience isn't stretched like mine is. Then I take a nice long soak in the tub and let him work with her for a while.

I just have the one so I'm able to focus on her more than you might be able to with yours.


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## talktomenow

double post!


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## talktomenow

Quote:


Originally Posted by *delighted.mama*
For the last several months I have been so frustrated with her. Half the time I am amused by her and the other half she drives me crazy. Everything has the potential of turning into a battle. Even if I diffuse it, she has now gotten to the point of being sassy and talking back to me. IT makes me SOOOO mad!







What's with this age!!

Oh the sassiness and back talking! That's my favorite part.







She has an answer to everything and I end up bickering with a 3 yr old! Ex: She has a wipe box she likes to "make wipes" in with some of our cloth wipes. Only, she doesn't wring them out or drain the box, so she drips water every where. Today, she brings them in the bedroom and drips/ pours water on my laptop and my nice new hardback book, somehow managing to peel off part of the label and drench half the pages. So, I'm calm, I say, " From now on, let's keep the wipe box in the bathroom when you play with it, okay?" Her:" I will not!" Me, "then I will have to take it away so your don't mess up anymore of mommy's things with the water." Her,(very angry) "Then I will get it down and play with it!!!" Me, "It won't be where you can get it down." Her, "Then I will hit you!!" Me, "Then you will have to go to your room." Her, "Then I will come out of my room, and go up to you, and bite you!!!!!!!!" You get the idea. It usually escalates into her grabbing, in this example, the wipe box, running out of the room and purposefully dripping it on stuff. Then I'd ask for it to go back in the bathroom or I'd have to take it. I'd end up taking it, she'd "attack" and so on. Agh!! :LOL

I know they feel oppressed and just want some freedom, but man, are we really being that demanding? Glad to hear I'm not in the same boat.

Delighted Mama, our babies are the same age, and I don't know about your's, but mine is starting not to like her big sister so much anymore. She pretty much expects something not so nice to come from their interactions. Sigh...


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## Meli65

Re: bickering as you've described it -- I try really hard not to get into arguments with my 3.5 year old ds. It never leads anywhere good.

Maybe you could try saying instead, "It makes me really sad and angry when my things get ruined with your wet wipes. From now on, you can either play with them only in the bathroom, or play with the wipes without water."

No, "okay?" on the end -- I think that's an invitation to sass! She gets a choice, this way. And if the situation continues, I would just put up the wipes box without a comment when she's not around.

Good luck! We have lots of challenges with our boy and I'm always looking for ideas, too.


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## Live~Laugh~Love

I have a 4 yo DS. I feel like sometimes, he listens so well, "okay mommy" and just a little gentleman, but others I feel so "short" with him as well.
Dont laugh, But I refuse to spank my son. Am I in the right place. I like to express feelings with words, or art work etc. Is this good? I will not hit him for not listening, but how else can I get him to listen?








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## colbysmama

Hi everyone. Unfortunately I do not have a solution. I am in the same place with my son at this time. Sometimes I just sit there in a daze wondering what happened? I do realize that from reading the posts it is funny to read but definatley not funny when you are going through it.
I have started doing"mommy needs quiet time" approach. I also notice that with my son it is much worst when he has an "audience".My son has been "spirited since day 1 and I try to think about him being such a strong adult that it sometimes helps my frustration.
I would love to hear a specific approach if anyone has any exact advice.


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## EmMomof6

A few thoughts from a mom who has been there. My son is now 4 1/2, but he was a child much like you've described. He was AP'd from the beginning, but I have tried other non-AP methods to discipline him once he was over age 3. Let me say that I thought I had a clue about parenting until this child came along...he is my 4th child (my oldest is 12). I don't believe AP has anything to do with it. My other children were AP'd and did not have these problems. Some children are just more challenging. While we can say "it's just a phase", we need to teach the child how to act in an acceptable manner, or it really can get MUCH worse. They can be tough at 3, but if they don't learn how to act appropriately, imagine what they will be like at 15. I am speaking specifically about the anger and destructive behavior. That kind of behavior is not normal, is not just a phase, and should not be ignored.

I don't want to go into my son's behavior problems. I will share a few things that have helped to improve his behavior (though he still has his moments of screaming and negative behaviors, he is no longer violent/destructive). He has made huge improvements and continues to do so because of the following:

Diet: we removed all artifical food colors/additives, white flours/sugars, processed foods, sugars. Many parents do not realize the effect that these foods have on our child's (and our own) moods and behavior. We added fresh fruits and veggies, whole foods, homemade whole grain or storebought Ezekiel/sprouted grain breads. Look for food sensitivities/allergies which can also cause behavior problems. Also consider yeast/candida overgrowth (a huge problem in children and adults these days). We used an herbal formula for children to get rid of yeast overgrowth, and also added a chewable or powdered probiotic. You can do an internet search on these topics to learn more.

Vitamin/Mineral Deficiencies: We use a product called KidCalm. It is a magnesium/zinc/vit. C supplement for children. Learn everything you can about boosting your child's immune system through diet and supplements. Deficiencies in the diet can cause mild to extreme behavior problems.

Look at your daily life. Is there a lot of chaos or disorganization in the home? Are the parents in agreement on how to discipline the child? My dh and I were not on the same page when it came to how to raise our children, and our disagreements were causing problems in our children's behavior. Anger is especially exhibited in situations like this. The same holds true for a mother who has been depressed (this was the case for me too). We also had a negative relationship with some extended family members that was causing stress in our marriage and playing a part in our daily life as a family. We decided to limit our time with those family members and work on our immediate family relationships (marriage and children). My husband and I are now in agreement on how to raise our children, but if something comes up that we disagree on, we no longer discuss/argue in front of the children.

Discipline: we found that spanking only made the anger worse (I hate to admit that I have spanked my children, having tried so many ways to deal with this child's extreme behavior I felt hopeless







). I really wanted to help my child, but at times I have been misguided and I admit it. Time out works if done consistently, but we sit there with the child while he is sitting there. It's not so much of a punishment, but more of a way to help him regain control over his emotions so he doesn't lash out and hit someone or destroy something. After time out is over (5 minutes of sitting quietly with mom or dad), he apologizes for whatever was done and we discuss appropriate behavior. Now that he is 4 1/2, he responds well to discussion and humor.

Consistency: children like this thrive on consistent routines and consistency in how you deal with their behavior BEFORE it becomes out of control.

I hope something I said is helpful to someone. I am by no means a perfect parent...I am still learning everyday.


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## Ruthla

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Foxxymama*
Dont laugh, But I refuse to spank my son. Am I in the right place. I like to express feelings with words, or art work etc. Is this good? I will not hit him for not listening, but how else can I get him to listen?







:

You're absolutley in the right place! MDC is set up to encourage gentle discipline and NOT promote corporal punishment!

My son is almost 4, and we still have some days like this, mostly when he's overtired. I found that the biggest changes came from taking care of ME so that I could react calmly to his behavior. It wasn't a matter of "not knowing what else to do" but not having the energy or patience to actually do it!


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## talktomenow

Thanks for sharing your experience, Em. I really appreciate it.

Meli, I try not to argue with her, but sometimes I get sucked in. :LOL

Ruthla, you are so right about having the energy or patience to do it! Sometimes, I actually think, "I could turn this into a game and she'd be fine." But at the same time, I'm in a rush and tired and it'd be so great if she would just do whatever it is the first time I ask, kwim? I made time today to do some yoga, and it really helped my dealings with her.

I think I just needed to vent, like a lot of other moms going through this it seems.







Thanks for the replies.


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## mainstreetmama

I don't know how to show a quote in my post, but I wanted to thank EmMOM for telling her story. I will try some of your ideas...it's just so hard to find a good solution when you're always in the middle of an outburst, or scared to think about the next one coming.

I've got 4 and the youngest is now -- you guessed it -- 3 and a half. He's so different from the others (not that I didn't have rough spots with the others) but the violence is so hard to deal with. He started from the very beginning, scratching, biting, hitting...well before one year. The weird thing is that he is very good at saying sorry and would sit time-out well before he was even one-year-old. But he just doesn't seem to get that he is hurting others. It's hard just to protect the other siblings.

Actually, my first son was angry a lot as a toddler too, but never had the kind of physical reaction as my youngest. It's just so hard to cope with.

On my bad days, I wonder if it is just the only way he can be heard in this chaotic household (yeah, I know, structure. I'm working on it. People laugh when they come into my house and see all the labels, charts, systems. The problem is that we are just -- tyring to look at it positively -- inherently creative, spontaneous, and tragically cerebral types and I can't seem to be consistent about anything).

On my good days, I think how wonderful it is that he has all this energy, and he is open to so many more new things than my other "sensitive" children. I think he'll actually make a great adult and do well in the outside world (friendly kid -- just dangerous).

Just one anecdote here, with a lesson it in that I'm still trying to figure out. Earlier this year, my older 3 stayed home with dad, while my 3-yr old and a babysitter and I went on a 3 day business trip (he was still nursing and I just couldn't bear to leave him...though I also couldn't bear to consider how awful a plane flight was bound to be...) Remarkably, my son was like a different child the whole time. Both his sitter-friend and I were amazed at how calm, non-violent, flexible and just plain nice he was to be with. So I know that child is in there somewhere, which kind of makes it worse that he is often so worked up. The only thing I could conclude was that having all the other kids around and the busyness of the household was just a bad environment for him. Now, how can I solve that?

I know he is really sensitive to sound. And he picks up on when there is tension with one of the other kids. I just can't seem to provide the kind of environment he really needs! And, of course, if I get the blues at all it makes everything so much worse. Sigh.

These past few days I've been on here on the mothering discussions late in the evening because dh has been lying down with ds without me (usually, ds rolls around between us till he falls asleep, which can take an hour or more, and often involves bruises on us). I can hear they've gone to sleep for real now...it's just so nice to have a little peace before it all starts over tomorrow!

-mainstreetmama


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## luckylady

I have a book called "your three year old - friend or enemy" and while I disagree with many of the premise in this book, it has been very helpful in understanding my DD's mind - especially at 3-1/2. THe basic psychology of the 3-1/2 YO is insecurity, fear, clumsiness, anxiety, fearful - and how do they express these confusing and conflicint emotions? by acting out! and to whom do they present this aggression - mom (or whoever they are closest to.)

Knowing this has made me WAY more patient with my DD. I also make sure and get her out to the park a few times a day to expend her energy and also build back up her self confidence.

I give her lots of hugs and kisses, especially in the moments I just want to scream because I know she doesn't know how to express herself.

Another solution is time away from one another - we do play swaps, she has daddy time and it helps. Both of us.

Actually they say every 1/2 until 5 is called a period of disequilibrium - things get tough. Seems to be true for us.


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## UrbanPlanter

subscribing to this thread bc I am having the same problems with my ds and posted about it here: http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=349678 in the allergies forum bc I thought it was a food thing, but maybe not...

I'll be back in a bit to read the whole thread and give a better response (naptime is about to end!)


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## mommyoftwo

I don't have a lot of advice but 3 1/2 or so was a really difficult age for us. Funny because we didn't have the "terrible twos" with her. I think that they are just learning so much that they get overloaded and overstimulated a lot.

My dd is now 4 1/2 and much more easy going. I was seriously starting to question her mental health but it just stopped. I guess she just learned how to better deal with her feelings. She can still be a typical child but those tremendous outbursts of anger have stopped.

A friend of mine says that the 1/2 years are the worst for some reason.


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## talktomenow

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mommyoftwo*
My dd is now 4 1/2 and much more easy going. I was seriously starting to question her mental health but it just stopped. I guess she just learned how to better deal with her feelings. She can still be a typical child but those tremendous outbursts of anger have stopped.

I am so glad to hear you say that!! I find myself questiong her mental health sometimes. This thread has given me some hope.







Have to remember, "This too shall pass."


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## UrbanPlanter

ok now having read this thread I am feeling much better! This is a great thread with great info and advice!

Now I am thinking that for us it is a combo of his age/environment/food/sleep

I should get some sleep now...


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## Chanley

Have you read, "Is This Your Child" By Doris Rapp

Some behavior problems can definitely be diet related. I used to think a mama here was making things up when she said her kids never threw tantrums. Well she had them on a pretty incredible diet and did her homework. (we all know this kiwi mama for her research







). Anyway, our big discipline issues surface when we have food that is on the NO NO list.

Otherwise, I have a pretty darn great little girl


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## UrbanPlanter

I would love to see that "No No" list!


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## megincl

urbanplanter, i was just about to post the same thing!








megin


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## Crystal_clear

Hi! I don't usually hang out in this forum, but I saw this thread on the MDC forum homepage and wandered in. My ds won't be 3 until New Year's, but I've seen some of this behavior. I have found that increasing physical contact with him has an amazing effect. It is *SO* hard to hug & cuddle with them when you are struggling to keep yourself calm while they are acting out but it does work for me. Then I have to make a point of initiating the physical contact frequently. I think they are so independent that they forget (and we do too) to get the contact that they need. With my ds, if he's having a meltdown my mental checklist is: hungry? tired? needs to sit on my lap? Anyways, just wanted to throw that out there as another possibility to try!


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## Chanley

We have food intolerances/allergies that trigger bad behavior. I have figured this out through years of elimination diets. Here she goes:

Corn especially corn syrup
artificial food colors (they are in everything, even cake mixes)
gluten
dairy
soy

This is alot of foods but as long as we stick with our diet we have really well behaved kids. They are a joy to be around. We still have some issues with sharing and normal stuff but the freak outs are gone.


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## EmMomof6

Adding to Chanley's list of No No's:

I noticed my son reacts to peanut butter in a bad way (even Natural pnut butter). Also, I agree w/Chanley that food coloring is in almost everything, so you really have to read labels (we shop at Whole Foods for a lot of our food now, because I've never come across food coloring in their foods). We have found artificial food colors in Salad dressings, pickles and relish, vegetarian bacon and sausage (Morningstar Farms brand), and so many foods that you'd never guess unless you read the labels carefully....even in dry fruit that I thought was healthy.

It's a good idea to keep a food diary of everything your child eats for a week or 2 and see if you notice a pattern of negative behavior after certain foods are eaten (especially anger, tantrums, destructive/violent behaviors, or hyperactivity). That's how we discovered our son's food reactions. We still suspect some foods and are working on improving the diet even more.


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## Treasuremapper

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Meli65*
No, "okay?" on the end -- I think that's an invitation to sass!

:LOL

For some reason, that quote just made me laugh out loud. I guess because I am always saying "OK?" or prefacing things with "I'm sorry, but...." just tiresome word habits that are totally working the wrong way.

I have a three and a half year old dd, too. I have no advice to offer, but I am reading yours eagerly. Hmmm... kidcalm... where do you buy it? Whole Foods?


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## Britishmum

OMG, you could be describing my 3 yo.

She has this habit recently of growling everything at me, rather than speaking. Everything has to be a demand, and an invitation to me to say no and have a verbal fight. Even things that I'm saying yes about. I refuse to fight with her, but she wants it sooooo badly!

Like, I ask her if she wants some ice cream. Her answer, roared at me, is "Yes, but only if you give me three scoops of strawberry and two scoops of vanilla in a pink bowl with the Pooh bear spoon. If you don't, I'll hate you and I'll never play with you again."







It's as if when she's in that sort of mood, she could never climb down and say "Oh, yes, thank you Mummy." Sigh.

I notice that a lot of you have a younger baby. Mine is 10 months too, and I think that has a lot to do with it. She really doesn't like him, and has even bitten him this week, several times.







She then tells me that she likes biting, and even then bit herself on the arm, hard, and told me "there, see, it doesnt hurt me."

I do notice that when I have time and energy to just give her one to one attention, and spontaneous cuddles and attention, things ease up a little. I also have started trying to create one game a day for her to play with me and the baby, so that she gets to see that he can be fun. She likes building towers for him to knock down, although she roars at him too if he does it 'wrong'









I'm so glad to hear that others are going through this. Dh was out today all day and when he came home I told him I was getting worried that I was doing something terribly wrong to have a child sooooooo challenging over every little thing. Now at least I know I"m not the only one!


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## EmMomof6

Quote:


Originally Posted by *inezyv*
:LOL

For some reason, that quote just made me laugh out loud. I guess because I am always saying "OK?" or prefacing things with "I'm sorry, but...." just tiresome word habits that are totally working the wrong way.

I have a three and a half year old dd, too. I have no advice to offer, but I am reading yours eagerly. Hmmm... kidcalm... where do you buy it? Whole Foods?

I haven't seen KidCalm at WholeFoods, but here is where I order it from:
http://www.absolutelythepurest.com/s...calm-kids.html

I also use the MamaCalm formula and I do notice a difference in how I feel (mellow, yet energetic, if that makes sense).









I agree with all of you who mentioned giving the child extra hugs & spending a lot of time with your child. I think I forgot to mention that very important point in my first post...but I am sure all of the mamas here already knew that since you're all so attached to your children. That is a big help (for ALL children, but especially for the challenging ones!). My son was always a challenge even before his younger brother was born, so I can't say it had much to do with having a baby. He loves his brother so much, they are inseparable. It is easy for us grown-ups to get so busy (or tired) with life that we forget to stop and really BE with our children. This is something I've really had to work on. Even my older children really need that special time w/mom or dad on a regular basis, and I notice that they are so happy when they get it. Same goes for the littles.


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## talktomenow

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Britishmum*
OMG, you could be describing my 3 yo.

She has this habit recently of growling everything at me, rather than speaking. Everything has to be a demand, and an invitation to me to say no and have a verbal fight. Even things that I'm saying yes about. I refuse to fight with her, but she wants it sooooo badly!

Like, I ask her if she wants some ice cream. Her answer, roared at me, is "Yes, but only if you give me three scoops of strawberry and two scoops of vanilla in a pink bowl with the Pooh bear spoon. If you don't, I'll hate you and I'll never play with you again."







It's as if when she's in that sort of mood, she could never climb down and say "Oh, yes, thank you Mummy." Sigh.

I notice that a lot of you have a younger baby. Mine is 10 months too, and I think that has a lot to do with it. She really doesn't like him, and has even bitten him this week, several times.







She then tells me that she likes biting, and even then bit herself on the arm, hard, and told me "there, see, it doesnt hurt me."

I do notice that when I have time and energy to just give her one to one attention, and spontaneous cuddles and attention, things ease up a little. I also have started trying to create one game a day for her to play with me and the baby, so that she gets to see that he can be fun. She likes building towers for him to knock down, although she roars at him too if he does it 'wrong'









I'm so glad to hear that others are going through this. Dh was out today all day and when he came home I told him I was getting worried that I was doing something terribly wrong to have a child sooooooo challenging over every little thing. Now at least I know I"m not the only one!

Hey, mama. We we're in the Nov due date club together.

Sounds, like my dd... She really doens't seem to like her little sister. It makes me so sad... and so angry when she hurts her! I get so mad! I think, "How could you do that to MY baby?!?!" And then I remember, "Wait, you are my baby, too." It's so confusing. You see this innocent, perfect little baby, and they see a huge annoyance and threat. I had no idea sibling rivarly began so young... And I keep getting the advice to hug and cuddle the older child who just hurt the baby, which is so hard for me at the time. Especially when the baby seems to take so long to calm down from the pain and the shock of being hurt by someone she looks up to. So hard.

On another note, I started a food diary today. I'm thinking part of the problem might be the "treats" that dh sneaks her, even when I tell him not to. Today he gave her pumpkin pie with a ton of whipped cream and then some chocolate pudding, which I didn't even want him to buy in the first place and then specifically told him not to take it out until dd1 was asleep.







:


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## Britishmum

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MabelsMama*
Hey, mama. We we're in the Nov due date club together.

Sounds, like my dd... She really doens't seem to like her little sister. It makes me so sad... and so angry when she hurts her! I get so mad! I think, "How could you do that to MY baby?!?!" And then I remember, "Wait, you are my baby, too." It's so confusing. You see this innocent, perfect little baby, and they see a huge annoyance and threat. I had no idea sibling rivarly began so young... And I keep getting the advice to hug and cuddle the older child who just hurt the baby, which is so hard for me at the time. Especially when the baby seems to take so long to calm down from the pain and the shock of being hurt by someone she looks up to. So hard.

On another note, I started a food diary today. I'm thinking part of the problem might be the "treats" that dh sneaks her, even when I tell him not to. Today he gave her pumpkin pie with a ton of whipped cream and then some chocolate pudding, which I didn't even want him to buy in the first place and then specifically told him not to take it out until dd1 was asleep.







:









Can you believe the babes are almost one????!!

Yeah, I was just talking to dh about the need to be gentle with dd even after she's hurt the baby. I'm going to try extra hard this week to intervene fast when the baby approaches dd, to try to help her respond appropriately. I also need to find a way to give her some individual time but I dont know how to do that right now.


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## mamazee

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Britishmum*
OMG, you could be describing my 3 yo.

Like, I ask her if she wants some ice cream. Her answer, roared at me, is "Yes, but only if you give me three scoops of strawberry and two scoops of vanilla in a pink bowl with the Pooh bear spoon. If you don't, I'll hate you and I'll never play with you again."







It's as if when she's in that sort of mood, she could never climb down and say "Oh, yes, thank you Mummy." Sigh.

:LOL

Yep mine's like that too. She only wants toast if it's cut in four triangles and they're set on the plate in a certain way and it's just the right plate. Cut the toast in rectangles or squares and a tantrum follows. But then, just to spice things up, the next day she'll insist her toast be cut in rectangles.


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