# Baby gagging at the breast- help!



## trancechylde (Apr 14, 2008)

My son (9.5 months) has recently started doing this (maybe 4 or 5 days ago) and for the life of me I cannot figure out why?

He is breastfed on demand when I am with him, and DH feeds him bottles with EBM while I am at work. This has been the arrangement since he was 4mo.

Our b-feeding relationship has become more and more "strained" over the last few months. I feel he is gradually drifting away, losing interest.
The only way I can get him to feed these days is to go into a dark room- no lamp, no tv, nothing, close the door and sing/make eye contact so he doesn't get distracted by anything (pattern on pillow, birds tweeting outside, AIR MOLLECULES moving hehe







)

IF i can get him latched on, it's maybe 3 out of 5 times he will STAY latched on until I have let down and actually finish a meal.
Often he will nurse until *just* as I let down, and then totally lose interest, leaving me full, dripping and frustrated. No amount of cajoling will get him to "finish" the job. This is wreaking havoc with my supply and my previously warm/fuzzy feelings towards nursing









It used to be that I could sneak in a few good feeds at night. We co-sleep and if I shove a boob into his mouth when he sleep-stirs, he would normally make a good go of it. Now this isn't working any more. He will take the nipple in his mouth and just comfort suck for a minute then fall asleep again.

Over the last few days, when I put him in the cradle-hold and bring him towards my breast, he actually starts GAGGING and retching!!! He has even vomited a few times. Small amounts.
I don't force the issue, give him a few moments to collect himself and try again. This works sometimes, sometimes not.

The only thing that has changed in our routine/daily lives lately is that he's just recently got over a bout of Roseola.
The fever has passed and the rash is almost gone, but he IS coughing when he wakes up and it sounds quite wet/phlegmy...

Breastfeeding is slowly becoming a daily battle for me. There are hardly any moments of tender closeness and baby suckling.
I have had a few moments of *anger* towards him lately and I hate myself for it...it's not his fault!!!
It's lots of wrestling, hot and sweaty baby and Mama, pleading for him to drink, him trying to squirm away from me
















I am feeling so sad and frustrated today...has anybody else's baby acted this way?

What do I do???

TIA


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## trancechylde (Apr 14, 2008)

wow- nobody???


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## H & J's Mom (Jun 1, 2008)

I was just in here to reply to a post I noticed about baby refusing bottle.

I had the same thing after my DS decided he finally liked a bottle. He stopped feeding from me almost completely for over a month. I tried and tried to get him to eat, just no interest. He even started waking once through the night again (I'm sure because he was starving since he hadn't eaten all day), even then he'd feed for maybe 5 mins and then go back to bed. My cycle came back, supply nearly dried up, etc.

It was a lot of work to get him interested again and he still prefered the bottle.

I really think it was the fact that he was very mobile and could get his meals a lots quicker from a bottle and then get back to play time.

Not sure what to tell you other than keep trying ....


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## Jaysfamily (Jun 5, 2008)

What about cutting out a bottle while you're gone? Maybe he's starting to get too full when you're not there and just isn't hungry enough to do anything more than comfort nursing when you get back. Is he still having breastmilk exclusively, or is he eating solids too?


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## _betsy_ (Jun 29, 2004)

Is he stuffy-nosed? DD started doing that a little bit when we both had seasonal allergies in the spring - poor thing couldn't breathe!

I'd try a nurse in. 2-3 days of nothing but boob, nothing but nursing.

Cutting down on bottles while you're at work may be a good idea, too.

Also, 10 months or so is a classic time for a nursing strike, if baby is going to have one it seems to be around 10 months.


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## annekka (Nov 19, 2001)

Hugs to you -- I know how difficult and emotional it can be when your babe starts refusing to nurse







. I've heard from a lot of mothers who had to deal with a nursing strike about that same age (8-9 months) and I went through something similar with DS. I've heard that something about their new mobility and awareness of the world at that age makes them uninterested in spending time at the breast.

I was working FT when DS was 9 months and he was getting a lot of bottles of EBM while I was gone, no solid foods at all due to sensitivity/vomiting. All of the sudden he wouldn't nurse except at night, then for a couple of days not at all. I remember crying after spending nearly an hour trying to get him to nurse, then finally gave him a bottle which he sucked dry







. He never went so far as gagging but he would push my breast away and even claw me with his fingernails. I felt so rejected and disheartened at the idea of either pumping more than I already was or weaning to formula. Friends and family told me he must be ready to wean but I didn't believe it. So I kept trying, took a few sick days from work to get him off bottles while I tried to get him interested in nursing again. After a day or two he was nursing again, no problem. We went through another nursing strike at 14 months, that one was even worse no nursing for 5 days before he started asking for "boom-boom" again.

So my advice is to keep trying and try not to take it personally or think it's a reflection on you, I know that can be difficult. Really it isn't unusual for babies this age but it doesn't mean they're ready for weaning. If you can take some time off work to be with your babe, find a quiet place to spend time together, and avoid bottles as much as possible, I would recommend it. Another thing I tried was starting a feed with a bottle then switching to the breast once he had eaten some and was more relaxed -- sometimes this would work. It's a pain but I'm guessing that if you're persistent this too shall pass. Good luck hope that helps some!


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## trancechylde (Apr 14, 2008)

Oh!

Thanks so much for the replies Mamas.







:

The gagging seems to have decreased a bit, but the's still not nursing anywhere NEAR as much as he should be.

He is eating solids about twice a day. Sometimes alot, sometimes a little. I did wonder if this was affecting things, but even when he was sick and not eating any solids, he still wasn't nursing very much.

He has a bit of a wet cough, but his nose isn't stuffy. I was wondering if maybe the gagging was some kind of post-nasal drip?

I worry about taking the bottles away- he needs to get milk SOMEHOW during the day when I'm away from him, especially if he's not nursing at night much...I suppose I could try putting EBM in a sippy? I just worry about wastage of my hard-earned milk.(we use a straw sippy and he hasn't perfected it yet) sigh.

This is so hard. I hear about all these babes that are attached to the boob 24/7 and I must admit I get a little jealous









I was also kind of hoping I could starting tapering the pumping sessions DOWN after 12 months, but now it looks like I'll have to ADD some sessions in on the weekends.

BUT- I will NOT give up. There is NO WAY our nursing relationship is ending anytime soon. I will just keep trying and perservering until he comes back I suppose.

I can't really take time off work, but this weekend it's gonna be me and him, naked cuddling in bed and hopefully lots of (some? ANY?)boob.

Thanks again for the support. It gives me hope and determination to just hang in there.


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