# King-size bed vs. co-sleeper bassinet?



## MariaSangria (Aug 19, 2009)

We are expecting our first in a couple of months. Not sure whether to spend the $$ (and space) on a king-size bed and sleep Baby with us or get a co-sleeper bassinet to use next to our current double bed (although now that I'm 7 mo. PG, the double feels super tiny).

Questions about using a big bed for parents & baby: how do you arrange the bedding? Do you need to get rails for one side once baby is mobile? Dr. Sears says not to put the baby in the middle ... is this realistic? I would feel strange having the baby on my side and then turning my back to him/her if I needed to change positions.

Anyone used a co-sleeper like the "Arm's Reach"? Did it work/not work for you?

Your input is much appreciated!! Thank you!


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## jmo (Mar 18, 2006)

I would definitely say a king size bed. We have an arm's reach co sleeper and neither of my kids ever slept in it. I know they do work for some people but both of mine would always wake up if I tried to move them after nursing them to sleep. I found it much easier to just keep them laying next to me. We had a queen when my first was born and upgraded to a king when we realized she would be sleeping with us for quite some time. Plenty of space. I do keep the baby in the middle and I feel perfectly comfortable with that. It's a big bed and dh stays on his side. If the baby is in the bed without us I just put pillows all around the edge of the bed and listen carefully for any movement.


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## Drummer's Wife (Jun 5, 2005)

Get the king size bed! It will last you a lot longer than a co-sleeper thing.

Dr. Sears may not say to have baby in the middle, but that's always how we've done it (with four kids).


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## justKate (Jun 10, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jmo* 
I would definitely say a king size bed. ... I found it much easier to just keep them laying next to me. ... I do keep the baby in the middle and I feel perfectly comfortable with that. It's a big bed and dh stays on his side.









:

Don't waste the money if you're comfortable with the idea of co-sleeping. I wasn't, so I ended up with a crib, then a pack'n'play. DD never sleeps in either of them. Plus when you're BFing, it's easier for you to change sides of your LO, rather than moving him/her. Your huz/partner will be so afraid of rolling on to the baby that he'll stay waaay over on his side. You can always get a $20 safety rail if you really think your LO might roll off.


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## spirit4ever (Nov 4, 2004)

Get the king!!!
I used side rails from the very beginning, well on one side, the other side was up against the wall. And I tried not to put baby in the middle, dh just sleeps too soundly, but I did put my back to the babe, wasn't an issue


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## etsdtm99 (Jun 19, 2009)

Get the king.









We have a king size bed, with DD, she slept in the middle, but we had one of those nest-box thingys .. she didn't sleep in it, but it was between her and DH so he couldn't roll on her.. with DS, we had a rail and DH was very good at staying way over on his side - DH & I each have our own blanket and one pillow each. when DS turned 9 months he fell off the bed (while napping.. oops) at that point we moved our mattress to the floor until he learned to climb off the bed.. then we moved it back up and now we also have his crib converted to a toddler bed and pushed up against our bed - kind of like a co-sleeper it is so nice having an extension of our already huge bed







though with the king size bed that is really not necessary.. also though, once they are pulling up to stand teh railings are kind of hazardous.. moving the bed to the floor and/or against a wall is usually safer..


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## Loralz (Feb 20, 2009)

Well, I'll be the odd one out and say get both if you can. Not all babies like to co-sleep all the time. Wee One didn't really want to from 3 weeks old to 4 months old, then she wanted to until she was 8 months or so. Now she's 11 months old and does about 50/50. AP is about following your child's lead, not fitting into an ideal.









She's now almost a year old and I nurse her to sleep on the bed for naps and bedtime, or dh puts her to sleep after I nurse her. When she falls asleep during the day (and she's quite particular about sleeping with the light on and the fans going during the day! at night we can drop the light, but must have fans), she falls asleep on our bed, surrounded by pillows. When she wakes up, she rolls into the co-sleeper and plays there and on the bed--she loves crawling back and forth.

At night, she falls asleep on the bed and rolls into the co-sleeper almost as soon as she falls asleep. When she nurses at night, she will pull off and roll into the co-sleeper and sleep away. I keep her in bed with us from about 4 on. Unless she's teething or sick, she wants to be able to sprawl in her own space at night.

So we've used the co-sleeper off and on for almost a year now and it was a great investment for us. We got it used, so woo hoo!

You can also side-car a crib http://www.freewebs.com/sidecarcrib/index.htm and get almost the same use out of it. Some people don't like the fact that the AR has a lip, so it's not level with the mattress. I like that feature.

That all said, as soon as the next check comes in, we're also getting a king-size bed. We've always loved the big beds, but not had the room for one. But our new house has a biiiig master bedroom and now we can get the big bed we want! Dh is looking forward to not being kicked awake as often at 5 a.m.









Oh, and about the bedding in the big bed. Dh and I used separate blankets while she was co-sleeping full-time with us. Now we're back to using one comforter. Since Wee One is almost 1 year-old, no worries here about suffocating. Well, I haven't worried about that since I came in the room when she was 4 months old and she was taking the pillow and putting it over her and lifting it up and giggling, silly girl.


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## Picturesque (May 31, 2007)

For many of the reasons posted above, I'd also go with the king. Having said that, please do your homework on mattress offgassing if you haven't already. If you're not planning to buy an all natural mattress, just before the birth of a baby is the worst time to get a new bed, as the gases will be strongest when your LO is most vulnerable. If you aren't able to get the all natural mattress (they're EXPEN$IVE!), at least consider getting a mattress wrap to try to contain some of the gases.


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## isabchi (Sep 14, 2006)

Get the King!....


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## everything to one (Aug 17, 2009)

we bought a co-sleeper and started out using it but always ended up pulling her into bed with us a)- to nurse and b)- because her temperature and breathing were a lot easier to monitor and regulate when next to me rather than in the co-sleeper (she always had a cold nose and hands! Jan baby- so i spent half the night sitting up checking on her. when she slept beside me every time i checked her she was warm and fine and soon i just slept more and better- we both did!) GO FOR THE KING!!!







i'd love to have one. we bedshared with our baby until she was too big for three of us to be in a queen size (she turns sideways and takes up a lot of space!!) and my husband kept getting booted to the couch or guest bed. so finally i started nursing her to sleep on the guest bed, putting pillows on all edges of the bed, and going back to bed with my hubby for part of the night. she never came close to rolling off until she was over a year and we finally put the mattress on the floor. if we had a king we would all sleep together. when we go to hotels and have a king it is WONDERFUL! we've even contemplated putting the two queens together bc we dont have money for a king! lol. OR you could buy TWO TWINS and get the piece that attaches them making a king. then when your kids (eventually) need twin beds you can go back to using the double and give them the two twins. maybe more cost efficient. that was our other idea. i know ppl that have used the crib beside the bed with the side off and they slide the baby over after nursing and also have friends who built a siderail to their master bed. we always slept with the newborn between me and the co-sleeper- it acted as a barrier plus a rolled blanket for extra barrier. once they are a little older they can definitely sleep between you and hubby but hubby might just not sleep well if he worries too much about rolling. but my advice is think ahead! the co-sleeper wont fit the baby long anyway, so invest in a bigger bed option! good luck!!!


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## dachshund mom (Dec 28, 2007)

King! We have a king with a sidecarred crib and there's lots of room. DD never stays in the crib though, she scoots to me every time I put her there.


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## MamieCole (Jun 1, 2007)

We have both. My DH is a big guy, so even without a babe in bed with us, there isn't a ton of room, even in a king. With DS, he never actually slept in the co-sleeper, try as I may. I borrowed one from a friend at the time. It got no use, other than holding diapers and wipes for nighttime changes. He was definately an in-arms, constant physical touch baby. He has slept with us in the king from day one. I never worried about whether he was in the middle or side, as with nursing I'd end up switching him from side to side many times per night. He's almost 3 now and even though he weaned a couple months ago, he still asks to "flip over to the other side" if he wakes at night. We never used a rail either. But, DS has never really been a tosser-turner kinda sleeper.

Even though DS never went for the sleeping out of my touch thing, I am going to try the Arm's Reach with this new baby anyway. Can't hurt to try. I found one on Craigslist for $65. I'd LOVE to be able to actually sleep with my DH and I having the majority of the bed to ourselves with baby still right there next to me. We shall see.


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## MariaSangria (Aug 19, 2009)

Thanks TONS for everyone's suggestions. I think we will go for the king-size bed (there won't be room to also have the co-sleeper) ... and see how it goes. I'm very glad to know about the off-gassing issue (had never heard of this before). We probably can't afford an organic mattress but will do our best to "air out" a new mattress for a few weeks and then wrap it.

Soooo thankful for this and the other forums on Mothering.com. They are a huge help and remind me of the whole community of moms & families doing our best!


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## Amandamanda (Sep 29, 2007)

we were in the same situation once upon a time and we went with the king size bed. it was such a good investment because it lasts alot longer! we slept with baby in the middle. dh and i use different blankets (im always too hot and he is always too cold haha) and dd would just share my thin blanket. i'd put her higher up than me, so the blanket never came above her chest. it worked for us- dh and i are both really light sleepers and there was never a problem.


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