# hysterical pregnancy???? after miscarriage????



## mom2tatum (Mar 14, 2007)

I just had a tough, strange, confusing, and very sad conversation with a good friend of mine. I don't really know what to think about any of it, so maybe I can get some help here with perspective in addition to any information.

Her sister was pregnant and due in May. They are an extremely close family, and her sister is like her very best friend in the world. The whole pregnancy my friend kept saying she was barely looking pregnant, and she just looked fatter in the belly a little bit - I only saw her around 3 months, so I had no idea. I kept telling her, don't worry I didn't get very big either and things like "oh everyone looks different, she'll get bigger." Well, her sister never gave a whole lot of information throughout the pregnancy, but no one thought it odd. They had a huge baby shower in March and she seems so excited according to my friend. She called my friend two weeks ago and told her she was in labor and going to the hospital. The doctors kept came in to the family soon after most of them arrived and told them the baby was stillborn and would not give any information and told them they could not see the baby. My friend was devestated. They even started to plan a funeral.

Her sister eventually told her the next day that the doctor explained to her that she had a "hysterical pregnancy". She told my friend (her sister) that the doctor told her that she miscarried the baby a long time ago, probably as early as 3 or 4 months yet her body never rid the pregnancy or the hormones so she continued to believe she was pregnant. Just from that info, I had a million questions. I have heard of women imagining being pregnant and actually having some symptoms, but this? This woman is NORMAL, I thought. She is young, only 24 and unmarried, but she has only seemed mentally and emotionally stable to me. I am so confused. Does anyone have experience with this?

My friend does not know what to think or do for her sister. Everyone in their family thinks she was lying the whole time. Her sister just keeps saying, "I was pregnant. I didn't get my period for 9 months, my belly grew, etc." She is asking my friend to believe her over and over. She keeps saying that no one understands. My friend thinks she must've miscarried normally and knew it but cleared it from her memory immediately and went on like it never happened, because she couldn't handle the loss. But, she told her (my friend) that she would schedule OB appointments and just tell herself she couldn't make it at the last second, never consciously thinking this, but because she probably didn't want the doctor to tell her she wasn't pregnant.

She also told my friend that the doctor told her it happens all the time, and women commonly make this same mistake. WHAT?!? I never heard of that being a common thing. And I never heard of it happening after a miscarriage either.

My poor friend. She said to me tonight crying, "Do you think she is crazy? Do you think C lost her mind, do you think C's going to be ok?"


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## kaylee18 (Dec 25, 2005)

It's called pseudocyesis. Citizenfong on this board had a full pseudocyesis gestation as well. It does happen, and used to be a lot more common before ultrasound was commonly used (allowing women to come to terms with their actual condition much earlier). She will be fine as long as people stop calling her a liar, or crazy, and extend some compassion and understanding. The experience may have been especially traumatic for her if she was told her baby was stillborn, and since she is not being given "permission" to grieve by her family and friends. I am surprised that her physician left her only with the outdated term ("hysterical" indeed!) and not with resources to deal with the psychological consequences.


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## mom2tatum (Mar 14, 2007)

Oh my. But, she apparently didn't actually pass the pregnancy until 9 months gestation, even though it had been dead many months ago. Thats what she is telling my friend, and thats why she thought she was really in labor...I had no idea that was even possible. I am in total shock, it is the most bizarre thing I have heard in a long time. I am thinking about forwarding on some information I gather from here and online and then passing it to my friend to give to her sister since no one seems to be helping her understand it too much. I am not sure, but I feel worried for her. Her boyfriend broke up with her over it because he thinks she lied about the whole thing...so that is messing her up as well. And she feels like her friends think she is nuts, so she is feeling like she ruined all her relationships in addition to the emotions she must be feeling from losing the baby in this way. My friend is worried, but thinks she'll be fine by talking to a therapist. I don't know, it sounds pretty deep to me. I really want to get some information her way, but maybe its not my place....


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## TayTaysMama (Oct 16, 2007)

I really don't have any information. This is a heartbreaking story. How sad that she had to lose her baby and now the people she needs most to support her are calling her a liar. That poor girl. I would definitely get her as much info on this as you can and also encourage your friend to support her sister. Sad. I will be keeping her in my thoughts.....


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## mynetname (Mar 17, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *TayTaysMama* 
That poor girl. I would definitely get her as much info on this as you can and also encourage your friend to support her sister.


Same! Really, really important for your friend to support her sister!
Especially if everyone else is not only not supporting her but being downright mean to her about everything. How awful and what a mean doctor and awful medical term.
The fact is she lost her baby: those surrounding her should try to comprehend that. How it happened is really terrible and would require A LOT of support I think from those around her. Why do people judge everybody so much?
Good for you for supporting your friend and trying to find out how to help further. Maybe counseling could help her as an objective place to discuss her feelings.


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## greenmamato2 (Jun 15, 2008)

Not all miscarriages pass naturally. Its possible that the tissue & baby stayed in and didn't pass naturally and it kept her body fooled that it was pregnant. Its a real condition - it happens far more than people realize. It sounds like not only did she experience one of the most horrific experiences a woman could imagine, but she isn't having any support. My heart is breaking for her.


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## kaylee18 (Dec 25, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *greenmamato2* 
Not all miscarriages pass naturally. Its possible that the tissue & baby stayed in and didn't pass naturally and it kept her body fooled that it was pregnant. Its a real condition - it happens far more than people realize.


Yes, actually that's happening to me right now. If this pregnancy had been normal, I would be 16 weeks along. Instead, I'm stiiiiiiiiiiill waiting for it to pass (with close monitoring by a physician who wanted to use Cytotec weeks ago...). The hCG has just recently dropped enough that I get a negative pregnancy test (finally!). Development ceased at 4-5 weeks, so it's been 10 weeks of waiting for the gestational sac to pass. The ultrasound last week found it still in there. I didn't make an immediate connection with this friend's case since I know I'm not still pregnant (except in some technical medical sense of having retained tissue, I guess).

If tissue was passed that the physician saw, it should have been sent to pathology since it could be something much more dangerous such as a molar pregnancy (which I've also had, strangely enough), and the woman should have been told she was mistaken about the baby's developmental stage and had a miscarriage. Not that she had psudocyesis, which typically does not involve a pregnancy at all.

The important point, though, is that whether pregnant or not, she really did believe she was. Whatever you want to call it, she has suffered a loss, and people should lay off. I'd send her a sympathy card or note and pass any information you think might be important to her through your friend so she can give it to her sister if she thinks it would help.


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## Fyrestorm (Feb 14, 2006)

It's totally possible! I'm so sorry for your friend and her sister! I hope your friend can find it in her to support her sister and allow her to grieve. She did loose a baby.

As the PP stated, sometimes you don't pass a m/c naturally. I had light bleeding at 12 weeks with my first pregnancy. I went in and there was no HB, I had about a 10 week gestational sac. I refused a D&C and waited for it to pass. I went for blood work every week for 3 weeks and then had some cramping and more bleeding. It thought that was it. 4 months later, I started hemorrhaging. I had never passed it all. My blood would have still shown me being pregnant. So I can understand where your friends sister would still think she was pregnant!


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## mom2tatum (Mar 14, 2007)

She must have KNOWN, though, because she happened to miss every single appt at the OB office, yk? She knew, maybe subconsciously, but didn't want a doctor to actually tell her. She wanted it to continue instead of facing it...

Question? What is a molar pregnancy and how is it dangerous? I want to know everything before I send over info and talk with her sister...

Thanks


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## kaylee18 (Dec 25, 2005)

A molar pregnancy is a genetic anomaly that occurs when the egg is fertilized by 2 sperm, or by one sperm that doubles, making 2 sets of sperm DNA when there should only be one set. It's also called a hydatidiform mole.

The two sets of sperm DNA make the development incompatible with life. There are two kinds: complete and partial. A complete mole (the kind I had) involves no fetal development. A tumor grows in the uterus in the shape of a bunch of grapes. A partial mole involves a baby with complete trisomy (3 copies of every chromosome). The placenta of a partial mole also becomes a tumor the shape of a bunch of grapes. A molar pregnancy is genetically different from its host and produces all the usual pregnancy hormones, including hCG (which causes a positive pregnancy test). One-third of molar gestations are smaller than would be expected for gestational age (as mine was), and the other two-thirds are larger, some much larger.

Molar pregnancies occur randomly about once per 1,000 pregnancies. They are dangerous because 5% of partial moles and 20% of complete moles regrow as malignancies after the initial pregnancy is over.


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## mom2tatum (Mar 14, 2007)

Wow. That is something I never heard of. I will pass that on as well. THanks.


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## greenmamato2 (Jun 15, 2008)

Quote:

She must have KNOWN, though, because she happened to miss every single appt at the OB office, yk? She knew, maybe subconsciously, but didn't want a doctor to actually tell her. She wanted it to continue instead of facing it...
She may have feared it, and went to her family members and friends for support (you mentioned that she talked about concerns of not showing much, etc)... but if her body still had the tissue and was reacting as though it was pregnant, she would have gotten a positive pregnancy test every time.

Imagine for a moment what it would be like to be so afraid that there is something critically wrong with your pregnancy and everyone is telling you you're worrying too much, and then all pregnancy tests are coming back positive (because let me tell you - when i am afraid something is wrong i rush to pee on a stick having lost 2 babies. It either makes you look insane for questioning a pregnancy that in all other respects looks normal, or it makes you look crazy for "believing" you're pregnant and not being pregnant.

You said she missed every single appointment... its possible that its the case that she didn't go because she didn't want to hear that something was wrong, but why would she keep making appointments??

And again - i have to really give her sympathy here because NO ONE wants to hear that something is wrong, and we all want to trust our bodies to tell us when its not right (and hers wasnt!!).

MANY MANY women self-care because they're tired of the hype and fear that comes from looking at pregnancy as a clinical matter, but when a woman doesn't seek care she must have subconsciously been trying to fool herself and her family?

What about the women who choose not to get amniocentisis, or have blood tests to rule out genetic abnormalities? Many women dont because they feel such an intense love for their baby (whom they've never met face to face) that they dont CARE if their baby is going to be disabled in that it won't change the fact that their pregnancy & baby are real and loved so so desperately.

HOWEVER long her pregnancy lasted, it was her BODY that fooled HER - not her that pulled the wool over everyone elses eyes. SHE is the one who lost a child. SHE is the one who should be gaining support right now. - ESPECIALLY because her SO left her.

This falls under that umbrella of what unconditional love & friendship means. She needs a break, a hug, and a friend.


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