# Will only nurse while sleeping



## Averys_mom (Sep 27, 2004)

This is a very frustrating problem. Most people have babies who will only sleep if nursed... Well, my baby will only nurse if already sleeping.

DS hates being put in the nursing position and will screetch and stiffen up if I try to feed him (even when he's really hungry). I've tried everything -- every position, when he's not hungry, slightly hungry, very hungry, a dark quiet room. And in those rare times I do get him to feed, he kicks frantically and will only have just enough to quench his thirst.

He'll fall asleep starving and I'll feed him. He then gladly opens his mouth wide and nurses beautifully.

He's a really happy baby otherwise, but doesn't seem to like to be bothered to feed (he's four months old) while he's awake. He likes to bf while sleeping, though, and did some reverse cycling until I figured out that I need to feed him every time he takes a cat nap during the day.

Has this happened to anyone out there?


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## ashleylesh (May 20, 2005)

i know exactly what you are going through! my son is also four months and is doing the same thing. i think these silly little babies don't want to give up their precious time for nursing!
ds will arch his back, squeal, and be so angry when i know know know he is hungry and try to latch him on, sometimes i bend him into position and then he will usually latch on for a moment and get a big drink, but surely not a meal.
we have tried tons of wild positions. the one that helps most is simply laying down. even that doesnt work sometimes.
he nurses wonderful when he is sleepy or sleeping. just before his nap this morning, he didnt want to to nurse, just fuss and look around. finally i got him hooked on, cozied up in a blanket and he nursed. but of course, i could not hold his head, i had to support it with my leg. he also likes me to use a pillow for his head. he just craves freedom! if he had his way, he would probably be out riding a bike right now!








the good thing is this, i weighed him yesterday and he is a whopping 18lbs, the babe is surely well-fed.
i just keep telling myself, 'this too shall pass' and 'someday he won't even need to nurse, so just bear with it now'








as we approach the day of his starting solids, i get sad because that is the first day of his eventual weaning.
yes, i want him to grow up. yes, i want him to be my lil nursling forever.
we will get through it and as long as they stay healthy and trust that they will nurse when hungry, we will just come to eachother for support and know that this too shall pass.
then we will be onto another obstacle


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## caligirl (Jul 2, 2004)

I posted with this problem a few days ago. I couldn't figure out what her problem was.
My Dd is only 10 weeks but is doing this exact thing. She will nurse only for like 3 mins then stiffen up and pull away screaming. I've ruled out everything that could be causing this, tried different positions, tried to nurse when she's hungry, not hungry, you name it. I also thought I might have a milk supply issue and she was getting frustrated about the flow, or lack thereof, but I don't think it's any of those things.
Seriosly she went from nursing about every 1.5hrs to 3-4 hour stretches during the day, and was oh so crabby. Nursing was a nightmare.
I finally called a lactation specialist who I am seeing on Monday to try to figure this out even though today it seems better. Her diapers are wet and dirty at pretty much the same frequency as before but probably only because she would/will nurse beautifully in her sleep, and I was doing it every 1.5-2 hours at night.
What it is I have no idea...
we'll see what the lactation lady says on Monday!
Glad to see I'm not alone!


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## ashleylesh (May 20, 2005)

is she **** gaining good weight? you should try to find an LLL leader in your area. i dont want to diss on lac. consultants, but i have heard of a few bad experiences with them. on the other hand, i know some who have had great ones. just an idea, try LLL. i love my LLL leader, she has turned into a really great friend actually. she is a breastfeeding goddess.


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## wannabe (Jul 4, 2005)

yes yes yes this was us!!! (posted 'brainstorm this crying at the breast please')

(nak, sorry if terse)

For two months - from 11 weeks to about 41/2 months, only eat when asleep - got very quick at putting nipple in at first strirring. lots of eating at night too. Felt like the only SAHM whose baby reverse cycled (and felt very rejected) Slimmed down a LOT - to 10% percentile weight for height. Paed said was weirdest nursing strike he'd ever heard of







She went from eating every hour to hour and a half to as long as four or five hours!

Now five months will eat lying down in quiet room, back to eating every two hours and has two chins and belly fat again!

Was developmental, too much exciting stuff happenning for her (and fast letdown never made eating fun). Really really hard while it was hapenning, but now we are a dream feeding couple (well, so long as we can lie down in the dark for her to eat







)

Hang in there, it will pass with time.

ETA try dangle feeding position - they lie flat on back and you lean over them.


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## Averys_mom (Sep 27, 2004)

His weight did plateau until I figured out that I needed to quickly feed him every time he fell asleep. Now he's gaining great, but he'll still go about 4 hours between feeds during the day.

I have talked to my LLL leader (I go to the meeting every month) . She just said it's normal 4-month old behavior and to just bring him in a dark, quiet room to nurse, which doesn't always work. I understand it's common for babies to be highly distractable at this time -- But will it ever end?


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## wannabe (Jul 4, 2005)

Snap! we posted at the same time!

I can totally relate to PP who said don't want to start solids. We've just gotten comfy with nursing at five months - I don't want to give up our exclusivity in a month's time (or even two or three months - we're delaying because I'm not ready)


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## ashleylesh (May 20, 2005)

maybe once the babes realize that the world will not go away just because they are focused on nursing, it will stop.


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## earthmama369 (Jul 29, 2005)

Oh, I second the most-embarassing-position-in-the-world recommendation. I actually made my husband leave the room the first few times I did that with our dd to get her to nurse, I felt so awkward, but it really worked. Her arms and legs were free, and she could turn her head a little to see what was going on (I'd just move with her to keep her from pulling on my nipple). Lie baby flat on his back and position yourself above him on your hands and knees -- every baby's different, but that's the age when my dd wanted to see everything and it was one of the only ways she would nurse comfortably.


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## wannabe (Jul 4, 2005)

LOL @ sarah - I did it in my husband's office last week, with her lying on his desk.

Luckily the office mate cam in AFTER she was done.


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## carrietorgc (Sep 16, 2003)

we are having this issue too. it is a weird nursing strike, that's for sure. in our case, it started at 8 wks with thrush and now we think silent reflux. he is on zantac and finally sleeping better at night and we are trying prevacid as well. he was such a good nurser but has always done the back/neck arch after nursing. as the reflux diminishes his fussiness at the breast does to. for now we are just nursing while he is sleeping - thank god for catnaps!

craniosacral therapy helped a little, we will prob do more.


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## carrietorgc (Sep 16, 2003)

i should add - it started at 6 wks with ds wanting to nurse when waking up.

some things to try if your baby is overstimulated easily: swaddling, swaying/rocking, white noise, bouncing, baby massage.

some possible medical reasons for a nursing aversion: overactive letdown, reflux, thrush. lol, we had a bit of them all.

caligirl - our cst is awesome, and she is right there in ashburn. oh, and the LC at Loudoun Hospital is really wonderful.


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## caligirl (Jul 2, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *carrietorgc*

caligirl - our cst is awesome, and she is right there in ashburn. oh, and the LC at Loudoun Hospital is really wonderful.


Can you pm me their info??


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## carrietorgc (Sep 16, 2003)

done!

good luck. and fyi, my ds only had a few sxs of silent reflux - but is already alot better with the zantac, and i have high hopes for the prevacid since it cuts off all acid production.

he would arch his back after eating, fuss after eating, eventually not want to eat as long when awake, and then want to eat when asleep. also would eventually not sleep for long (esp. daytime) as the acid woke him up.

even now the poor guy is swaddled, sleeping on his side with his neck arched way back to relieve his throat.

i had to push his dr to try the meds, but it is just NOT normal IMO for an 8 or 10 wk infant to go from being a good nurser to a reluctant one.


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