# How many afterschool activities does your child do?



## Wild Lupine (Jul 22, 2009)

Just wondering about the range of time kids spend in activities after school/on the weekends. My 1st grader does gymnastics and dance, my kindergartner usually just does gymnastics, but he's doing T-Ball this month, too.


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## Mylie (Mar 15, 2004)

My first grader does T Ball..she has practice one Night a week and a game one Night each week...


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## jmarroq (Jul 2, 2008)

My 5th grader does scouts once a week for about 1.5 hrs, with monthly camping trips, and occasional community service projects. He does a short, non-competitive soccer season once in a while, with one practice a week and one game a week. He sees a tutor once a week. He's done lots of stuff on and off, but not more than two things at a time.

My daughter does gymnastics once a week right now.


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## limabean (Aug 31, 2005)

Usually just one.

Right now my 4th grade DS does baseball (3x per week), and my kindy DD does gymnastics (1x per week). In the summer they add swimming.


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## contactmaya (Feb 21, 2006)

3rd grader does dance, choir, soccer, chess. Kindergarterner does dance, soccer, and art and chess. I will enroll them in karate next semester.


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## quirkylayne (Sep 15, 2005)

My dd is in kinder and does tumbling one night a week. She could do more but I haven't let her yet. My 2nd grader does a "club" at school but more than that is too stressful for him, he needs downtime. I don't really count the club since it is a continuation of the school day.


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## KSLaura (Jan 22, 2007)

Second grader does gymnastics 3 nights a week (plus seasonal weekend meets), dance once a week, girl scouts 1-2 times a month after school, and violin lessons once a week after school (only during school year). She also has after school care one night a week at the school. Not really an activity, but a chance to finish up homework or study.

Soon-to-be kinder does gymnastics 2 nights a week and dance 2 nights a week. She'll add once a month girl scouts in a few weeks.


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## snarfmcgarf (May 9, 2014)

Dd7 does equestrian vaulting for two hours once per week, and takes riding lessons on Saturday mornings. Two days a week is enough for us.


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## USAmma (Nov 29, 2001)

My 13 year old does piano lessons once a week, guitar lessons once a week. She is expected to practice 6 days a week. We have a contract that if she wants lessons I will pay for them but she has to practice. She can back out any time. I don't force the lessons, but neither will I pay for them if she's not doing her part. Next year she will hopefully be in Jazz band and that is 3x a week after school.

My 10 year old does piano once a week and basketball (in season) 2x a week plus games on Saturdays.

I can't imagine doing any more than that-- I'm already very busy with just those activities and normal life.


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## LaughingHyena (May 4, 2004)

My 10 year old is currently doing three, swimming lessons, Woodcraft Folk (similar to scouts) and an after school practice for the school football club.

They are all fairly short, and other than the football club (which is straight after school) her brother does the same. That's probably the key for us, I'm OK taking them both to something but it's much more challenging when the other child is being dragged out on drop off/pick ups or having to sit through their siblings activity.


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## transylvania_mom (Oct 8, 2006)

Two activities during the school year, hockey and an instrument.
But hockey is twice a week, and so is the instrument (individual and group lesson). This doesn't include tournaments and concerts.
Two activities is plenty for us.


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## missnoodlesmom (Oct 22, 2007)

1st grader - soccer, piano, art class

Kindergartener - soccer, piano

They will both be joining scouts next year.


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## meowmix (Jul 14, 2005)

DD1- just horseback riding, though she does run her own business with a friend and that takes up time.

DD2- field hockey once a week (a clinic before the season starts), lacrosse, girl scouts.

DS is homeschooled but he does lacrosse, DJ lessons and a homeschool history class.


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## Skippy918 (Jul 15, 2008)

My kindergartner has been doing gymnastics for awhile and we just started a summer swim team. The swim team is sucking up a lot of my evenings and Saturday mornings, but he's loving it so far.


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## JudiAU (Jun 29, 2008)

One or nothing. School and homework for school are enough. He likes a lot of down time for his interests (drawing/reading/fantasy play/etc.). I can't even imagine how kids handle the schedules I I hear about. My kids are even tv-free and still never have enough free time.


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## pastamama (Sep 12, 2008)

2nd grader: scouts and piano. He did 3 last year, he was in a boys choir as well, but 3 was just too much.

kindergartener: 1, dance. She will start piano this summer and is doing gymnastics for summer instead of dance, but we will keep it to 2 for her in the fall.


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## leahr (May 15, 2005)

DD9 Has been doing gymnastics and horseback riding for about 4 years. Only once a week for each. she just started the clarinet which is once a week lessons but practice everyday. This spring she did Softball and is starting soccer here in a couple of weeks. Softball was a lot 2 practices a week and 2 games that schedule had her doing something every night of the week. Soccer is only one practice and one game which should be easier. I know this is alot and more than most people would do but DD is good at all of it and likes to do it all I don't put any pressure on her except when she makes a commitment to some one else. If you join a team sport you have to finish the season but you don't have to sign up again next year.


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## Tella (Jul 31, 2014)

just guitar classes after school


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## meowmix (Jul 14, 2005)

Wow.. I came back to this thread because we are crazy and got busier. This fall:
DD1 is in horseback riding still, she will play soccer (2 practices and 1 game a week) and still has her business. She will also be in Odyssey of the Mind, I'm sure, because we love the program. And she plays viola at school.
DD2 will be in field hockey (2 practices and 1 game a week), girl scouts and also Odyssey of the Mind. 
My homeschooled son will continue DJing (which takes up most of his free time), play soccer (2 practices and one game a week), he'e also in a homeschool book club this year and his studies will be more rigorous since he plans on going to high school at this time, so we want to keep up with the high school schedule. 
My husband will be assistant coach for DD2 so that saves me some driving to practices since he will be there. 
I plan on training my dog and taking her through agility so that will take up some of my time. And I'm hoping to pick up a class again to work on my degree at some point.

I don't know how we're going to juggle all these sports practices. I love kids' sports, though and am looking forward to our busy, crazy fall.


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## Melinda1980 (Apr 24, 2014)

A hectic life is not something I am comfortable with. Ive told my kids they can each choose one activity. So far only my DD (9) was playing soccer, which is practice one night a week then a game on Saturday. The new season starts in a few weeks and my DS (7) has decided to play also and will have the same schedule, tho his practices might be a different night. In the Spring I let DD do Glee also but it was only one day a week right after school for an hour so it really didnt impact our schedule at all.


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## NiteNicole (May 19, 2003)

I don't know how people manage after school activities. By the time my daughter gets off the bus, does her homework, eats, and showers, there is very little time for anything else like_ playing_ and kids need to just play sometimes. Every single moment of the day does not have to be productive. It sounds exhausting. Last year she broke down sobbing the second week of school because she said she felt like her brain never got to rest at all, all day long, so we moved her bedtime back by half an hour to get her ONE free HALF hour on week days. It's not even like she has tons of homework.

She does Scouts every other weekend and takes violin at school. She has to practice on weekends and "light" homework nights, and she does chorus before school one day a week. I thought about adding cheer on Friday nights and gymnastics during the week because she's been asking and I'm so glad I didn't. She is SO tired by 8.30 every night, I don't know how we'd fit in another hour (hour and a half including drive time) anywhere in the week. She'd hate it.

I'm not criticizing, its great that other people can manage all that, I just can't imagine how.


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## limabean (Aug 31, 2005)

NiteNicole, what time does your DD get home from school? My kids get out at 2:30 (and 1:00 on Wednesdays), so although our sports nights are busy, they're not unmanageable. 

DD's gymnastics is easy -- one hour every Saturday morning and that's it. 

Now that DS is getting older, his baseball takes up more time -- usually 2 midweek practices and a Saturday game. The practices typically start at 5:00, so DH comes home a bit early from work and takes him. So between 2:30 and 5, DS does his homework, has a snack, plays, and then has a light dinner or another big snack right before practice. Practice goes until about 6:30, then he still has 2 hours before bed to shower, eat if he's hungry, and do whatever he wants.


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## Wild Lupine (Jul 22, 2009)

NiteNicole, how much homework do your kids get? Do you feel it is an age-appropriate amount? Mine get a packet for the week, which allows them to do it when it suits their schedules. They do their HW on afternoons they don't have activities.


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## Peony (Nov 27, 2003)

I seem to be in the minority, we do a lot of activities. There are many reasons for this. I was never allowed to do any sports, clubs, hobbies, etc... after school or on weekends as a child and always desperately wanted to do something, anything, besides sitting around the house. And my children thrive and even need their activities. We fell into this rather innocently. Signing up for one class here, one class there, it just snowballed after multiple interests, multiple children. 

DD1 has had many interests over the years but now as a middle schooler has firmly decided on only two interests. She is both a competitive gymnast and a competitive snowboarder. We not only allow it obviously, but encourage it. She is severely dyslexic with an anxiety disorder. School is torture for her everyday, but sports is where she thrives. She throws her entire heart and soul into them. She trains many, many hours a week, has little free time, but refuses to give up anything. 

As I've had more children, they have wanted to do their own thing. DD2 is 7 and in 2nd grade. She takes a tumbling class once a week, and then we drop into karate 2-4 nights a week as our schedule allows. She is starting to show her own signs of a struggle with anxiety but becomes so confident in karate. She is working on her purple belt and was asked to be part of a karate demonstration team over the summer. The training for that has been minimal. She is heavily into dance. I'm almost scared to say how many classes she is signed up for this fall, I'm not really sure anymore. It is a lot. She is on a little mini dance team for the first time this year as well. Her favorite is hip hop and break dancing but she loves her musical theater classes as well. 

My only other child that is old enough to have his own after school schedule also has ASD and other issues. We use some activities like therapy. Ballet is amazing for his low tone legs. Gymnastics helps with his balance. Karate helps with his motor coordination and vocalization. 

I guess in a nutshell, we don't just do sports just to keep busy. Sometimes they are therapy or better then some therapies for some kids. Gymnastics has helped DD1 so much that our local city called last week and asked to do a story on her and how far she has come.


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## Nightwish (Sep 9, 2008)

I limit my kids' activities to two during school year and one in summer. Most of them take place on Saturdays - so evenings are relaxed, but our weekends are crazy.
NiteNicole, I'd rather my kids do arts or sports than homework. They study 6+ hours in school, no need for them to bring work at home. I don't bring work home, why should they?


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## P.J. (May 18, 2010)

My son is now four. When he was three I signed us up for a (pre-) swimming class (that we went to together). He really didn't like it and refused to participate in most of the games, songs and activities. So I decided from now on these extra-curricular activities have to be his idea and not mine. I can present him with ideas but I'm not signing him up unless he's into it. We don't have the money to throw away on courses he's not interested in. I do want him to learn to swim as soon as he's ready, which the instructor reckoned would be at five, so I'll encourage him to try again next year. But besides that I don't mind if he's not in after-preschool courses. He's at preschool from 9-3:30, 5 days/week which is more than enough activity and interaction for a four year old IMO. I think kids are too busy these days and I'm in no hurry to get mine on a tight schedule.


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## KSLaura (Jan 22, 2007)

So... does anyone notice a correlation between introverts/limiting activities and extroverts/lots of activities?

Some people (both here and IRL) can't seem to imagine why anyone would want a hectic lifestyle with lots going on.

My family THRIVES on this. All of us. We love being around people and being involved in lots of things. I can't imagine taking my kids home after school every night and just sitting at home. For some reason, that just doesn't seem appealing to me. I can see how introverts might appreciate it, though.

My third grader does 9 hours of gymnastics a week, the kinder does 3 hours a week. Older DD does 1 hour a week of ballet, 1 after school violin lesson per week, once a month girl scout meeting, and will likely perform in the Nutcracker again this year (1 hour a week practice till the show). Younger DD does 2 dance classes per week, and once a month girl scouts. 

So, we go straight from school to gymnastics most afternoons. The kids start their homework at school, as soon as the bell rings. They usually have a good 10-15 minutes to work on it before I pick them up. They normally finish homework on the car ride to gymnastics. The kids play/chat with their friends before/after class and during breaks. I chat with the other adults while I watch my kiddos. Its usually my favorite part of the day.  I take younger DD home after her class ends, and DH picks up older DD on his way home from work. We usually eat dinner at 7:30 or 8. Honestly, the biggest problem we have is coming up with quick/easy dinners and healthy, non-perishable afternoon snacks. We do a lot of crock pot meals.


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## KimPossible129 (Mar 9, 2007)

KSLaura said:


> So... does anyone notice a correlation between introverts/limiting activities and extroverts/lots of activities?
> 
> Some people (both here and IRL) can't seem to imagine why anyone would want a hectic lifestyle with lots going on.


Actually, the correlation I've seen in real life is that the kids who are introverts are being thrown into multiple activities by their parents. But by and large, most people I know (introverts and extroverts) are over-scheduling their kids. Since I don't know any of you in real life, I can't agree or disagree with what's best for your children and families. I just know what I see in the real and "Facebook" world. It's really overkill for so many people I know.

I agree with the parent who stated that their child really needs to want to do it in order for her to say yes to it. I know at a young age, most kids cannot fully express what they want, and many of them just say yes as mommy says "sweetie, you want to go to dancing AND gymnastics, don't you?" And the kid just nods her head.

I was witness to a child have a full-on panic attack this summer. As the camp nurse, I ruled out anything physiological when she came in gasping for breath. After talking to her for great lengths (in an effort to distract her and calm her done), she basically told me what her life is like. You name the activity, she does it. And she is the best in everything she does. The amazing thing about it is, that she did not see a thing wrong with her lifestyle. But this was the night before she was going home for her session... Back to her wonderful, over-scheduled life.

As a mom of a child with anxiety (and recently added on depression), I'm learning the importance of the balance between structure and down-time. When my dd14 isn't doing anything, she is mopey, unmotivated and anxious about the things that are upcoming. When she's in her activity (musical theatre- drama and singing), she is happy. This is all she wants to do. It's hard to juggle more than one of these activities at a time (with money, my job, hw) so there are times when she has more downtime than she should. Since she's 14, she doesn't "play"; playing is internet/phone, and will eventually become 'hanging out' with HS coming.

I may think it, but I would never tell anyone how many or few things they should have their kids doing. I would just encourage them to listen and closely observe their children's level of comfort and interest in the activities. Don't do it for you (because it's what you always wanted to do as a kid), or for Facebook brag rights, or to keep up with the joneses. You may be putting so much pressure on your child. And they have no idea how to tell you, because they either cannot express it, or are afraid of disappointing you.


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## NiteNicole (May 19, 2003)

The reality is there is just no time in our evenings for extra activities and my daughter has been pretty clear that she already feels almost too busy. She is in violin at school, but practices at home. She does chorus before school. She's in gifted so the academics are challenging, and she has Girl Scouts every other Saturday. That's enough for me and she has been clear it's enough for her. I'm not going to drag her to gymnastics or softball when she doesn't even want to go. She makes every effort to get an hour swimming or otherwise playing outside every evening. It sounds like so little but she is very protective of that "turn my brain off and be silly" time.

I know so many over-scheduled kids and they seem miserable. I am sure some kids thrive in five activities but I don't actually KNOW any. I can understand being pretty devoted to one activity he or she loves or is especially good at, but I don't see the need for extra activities every single day after school as well as Saturdays. I do not understand cutting into sleep or homework for the sake of making sure he or she doesn't "miss out" on anything. 

She does try different camps in the summer so if there were anything she LOVED, we might give it a try but so far she has been happy to do dance, karate, etc.


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## KSLaura (Jan 22, 2007)

KimPossible129 said:


> and many of them just say yes as mommy says "sweetie, you want to go to dancing AND gymnastics, don't you?" And the kid just nods her head.


And conversly, there are children who have been asked to drop an activity or 2 and child begs to continue.

Each family must find the balance that works best for them. Kiddos having panic attacks probably indicates something needs to change.

I haven't heard any anecdotal stories of kids who are left home alone every afternoon with tv as their only activity. That was my childhood.  The kids across the street is left to her own devices most days. She's expressed interest in other activities, but her mother won't take her, isn't home, and has no interest in kid activities.

One more point- overscheduling to one person may be underschduling to another. Individual perspective and personality play a pretty big role.


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## luckiest (Apr 29, 2009)

We don't have to decide this yet with our family (DS is not yet 4), but I think about it a lot because I was over-scheduled as a child (with only one activity!) and I can already tell that DS is going to want to do more than I'll be comfortable letting him do. 

I did competitive gymnastics as a kid. I was good at it, I liked it, and unfortunately the competitive track is really all that's available (then, at least). You do it for fun when you're three, then by the time you're five you pretty much either are good enough to prepare to compete by seven or you quit. So by default, doing gymnastics meant two hours after school four weekdays and three hours Saturday mornings, plus here-and-there private lessons when advised by coaches, and weekend meets during the season. 

In school all day already means lots of time away from family, and adding gym meant family dinners didn't happen. Maybe once a week. My siblings all had their own stuff going on, we rarely crossed paths. I did enjoy gymnastics, but by the time I was a pre-teen I burned out. I was even homeschooled when I quit! 

I know that's a more extreme scenario, but that's not what I want our family dynamic to be like. I don't want to be a chauffeur, I don't want to sacrifice the feeling of togetherness that comes from actually being together as a family. 

That said, DS is crazy active (people have been telling us he'll be an athlete since he was 15 months old) and crazy extroverted, so I know we'll be navigating these waters soon enough. What I'm thinking right now is that the bottom line is family dinners, every night, will be sacrosanct (within reason - meaning, nothing will be scheduled that we know will interfere with it or make it stressful; here and there exceptions, obviously). I will also probably limit it to one sport per season and one art at a time. I know most activities aren't as insane as my gym schedule, so two "normal" things seem doable. 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## KimPossible129 (Mar 9, 2007)

KSLaura said:


> Each family must find the balance that works best for them...
> 
> One more point- overscheduling to one person may be underschduling to another. Individual perspective and personality play a pretty big role.


I couldn't agree more. That's why I said that it's not my place to judge. Just sharing the experience I encountered, where I was the one who had to manage the child. It was frightening. If this were my kid and knew this had happened, I would have been very frightened.



> I haven't heard any anecdotal stories of kids who are left home alone every afternoon with tv as their only activity. That was my childhood.


Me neither. But I know plenty of kids who I grew up with that did. It's a different world today, especially in the child-rearing sense.


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## meemee (Mar 30, 2005)

When dd was younger she wanted more freeplay.

But as she grew older that changed.

We do a LOT of actives because dd is homeschooled now.

When she was in school we kinda worked her activities around school. These days we work school around dd's activities. She is involved in ten activities - one of which is community service too. All of them are once a week with one of them once or twice a month.

Looking back I could never have imagined dd in so many activities - but these are her Passion and it keeps depression away. They have completely changed her and brought out her best.

Until we first started our homeschool journey I did not realize how important other activities would be for her. 

And that it could be something she wants to get a degree in.


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## IdentityCrisisMama (May 12, 2003)

I totally agree - "different strokes for different folks". Scattered, hectic families seem to be that way no matter the number of activities, IME. And, yea, listening to the child is the key here - not how many activities a family chooses. 

I voted 3. DC does soccer in the fall (this time with school so it's just an extension of the day), she does a free theater program once/week that's a privilege that I'm happy to schlep her across town for, and last year she did a ceramics club through school. At the point in the year where all three overlap it can feel a little stretched, but, really, not much. DC and our family still have plenty of down-time and flexibility to be spontaneous. In fact, I'm thinking of asking DC if she wants to take music lessons in the winter if we can squeeze it in the budget. 

We are a family who needs a delicate balance between stuff going on and time to be in the moment. DH and I function more equally as parents/partners when there's lots to do. Our kids seem to thrive on the extra routine that is required when there is school and activities to do. We like our down time on weekends and in the summer but look forward to a fall and spring with a relatively full schedule.


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## AAK (Aug 12, 2004)

In regards to my 8 yr old, I marked two. I goofed though--it should be 3 or 4 depending on how you count things. She does soccer (spring/fall) which practices twice a week and has games on Saturdays. She does dance--this year will be twice a week. Last year it was once/week. She does piano, but it is in the morning once/week. She also does Sunday school (but on Wednesdays). We homeschool though so we don't have to juggle homework with afterschool activities. My older daughters also have activities. Dinner as a family is pretty rare, but lunch as a family is more common. 

Oh, forgot. She also does girl scouts (twice a month).

Amy


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## marsupial-mom (Feb 3, 2010)

My pre-k little one does three activities after school right now. He goes to school all day (not half day) but still has energy to do more. He does some art and music at school already as well as a second language so those don't need much extra after school IMO yet. In addition to the three weekly activities (swimming, soccer, and yoga) we do special camps and mini classes to try out other things (gymnastics, karate, dance, music). In the past it was four or five weekly activities but we realized that schedule was just a bit too much for all of us. We like what we've got now because it leaves weekends free. 

My theory is that he should try lots of things now when he's young to see what he likes and what he has natural talent for. And then as we figure that out, we'll cut it back to just one or two activities that he really shows strong interest or talent for. 

If I had many children, we would not be doing so many activities. We would pick one or two and all the children would do the same thing. But since I only have the one I feel fine doing more with him.

ETA:
We took a little break over the holidays and have stopped all scheduled after school activities. We're planning to start up again with one or two 'classes' (tennis and basketball probably) and then family activities like swimming and bike riding.


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## colsxjack (Dec 9, 2009)

Our 5 yr old DD is in all day kindergarten. 
She will be doing one activity per week over the fall. A 45min ballet class on Saturday mornings. 
Plus swimming with a parent once a week. 

In the winter session we will put her in two activities. 
Swimming lessons and skating lessons. Just because we want to reinforce swimming before summer comes up again. Plus we want her to know how to ice skate. We live in a place where ice skating is a common social activity for a kid. 

In te summer she didn't do any extra activities. Just play at the park for 5-6 hours per day.

We plan to keep it to 1-2 activities at a time throughout her childhood.


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## IdentityCrisisMama (May 12, 2003)

marsupial-mom said:


> My theory is that he should try lots of things now when he's young to see what he likes and what he has natural talent for. And then as we figure that out, we'll cut it back to just one or two activities that he really shows strong interest or talent for.


I think this is a good way to go but want to mention that not all kids figure this out in early childhood. I have a bit of personal envy for people who managed to find somethings to focus and specialize in because I still haven't found that for myself. I'm observing my child and she has similar tendencies - a dabbler. Now, I am softer on myself because I understand its value through my child. <3 Dabblers are cool too.


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## contactmaya (Feb 21, 2006)

I dont know if i mentioned this upthread or not, i posted a very long time ago, and this thread keeps popping up.

I am finding that its all in the timing. You can do alot more provided the timing is right. For eg, we try to limit afterschool to two days a week, and for those classes to be no earlier than 530. That way, my kids can come home, eat, relax briefly, then go to an after school that may be in itself relaxing (for eg, my 2 boys are doing a cooking class), followed by a swimming lesson. Then home to bed.
The next day, there is art, and dancing. 

The rest of the week, nothing...time for homework/playdates, or plain old nothing. I often find i have the need to catch up on doing nothing at all.

Its very important in my book, that the kids eat a good meal before launching into afterschool activities. This gives them renewed energy, fuelled by good nutrition and calories. Activities done on a quasi empty stomach after a full school day is a very bad idea., but the norm for most. 

So no activities at 4 for us, nothing earlier than 530, a 6pm start is even better.

I dont really care if they specialize or not. I like the idea of general exposure, but more importantly, i like the idea that the child is enjoying him/herself, and being enriched. I dont have their career propsects in mind.
(lucky for them, because they arent the best dancers in the world ;-)


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## contactmaya (Feb 21, 2006)

meemee said:


> When dd was younger she wanted more freeplay.
> 
> But as she grew older that changed.
> 
> ...


This is so great. I love that you work school around her activities rather than vice versa. That would ghave the be one of the main benefits of homeschooling.


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## meemee (Mar 30, 2005)

contactmaya said:


> This is so great. I love that you work school around her activities rather than vice versa. That would ghave the be one of the main benefits of homeschooling.


gosh. until we started hsing i had no idea how much school was 'killing' her. how much she needs the arts to balance out her interest in academics.

today all her studies are based around infectious diseases. her history project for middle ages is what were the diseases during that time and what did the rich people die of then (fascinating subject, and rich because they would have access to the best 'medical' care). her science project is researching why we dont hear of cancer of the heart. can the heart develop cancer?

however hsing IS a struggle. just to stay on task. and not enough social interaction - for the kind dd wants.


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## contactmaya (Feb 21, 2006)

Actually, i enrolled both boys in art because i felt it would be relaxing and enriching for them. Last night, my ds1 said that doing art at the end of the day was the best part of his day. He was on a high after it, and couldnt stop talking!

I hear you on the challenges of homeschooling, im still in the thinking stages. I think we might try it for my older son when he gets to middle school...or possibly next year. He's 9 now.


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## mommy68 (Mar 13, 2006)

ZERO

I want to see my children at some point during every day of the week. Throughout the years I have either home schooled or chosen private school but my children will not do anything that keeps them away from home and being around family. My 12 yr old did gymnastics for about six months last year for one hour per week and that was hard enough. I have a life too and I want to see my children in the evenings and not spend that time driving them around to events and practices and such. They can still grow up just fine not getting involved in all of that.


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## KellsMcG (Dec 30, 2014)

So long as our kids are staying active before sunset, it doesn't matter to us what official activities they're taking part in. For example, our daughter does gymnastics Mon/Wed/Fri, so Tues/Thurs she's at daycare. At daycare, they have kinetic motion toys that keep the kids on their feet and high energy until we come to pick them up. Gymnastics she does individually, daycare she does socially.


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## squimp (Nov 7, 2005)

My 5th grader tends to like lots of activities, but she can reach her limits. She works hard in school and takes schoolwork and associated school stuff like student council or academic activities seriously so she will let me know if she's overwhelmed. She does piano once a week (plus practicing), choir once a week, swimming twice a week, and soccer once a week (this will shift in the spring when she drops swimming for running). She also takes a class on Saturdays and is practicing for an academic competition once or twice a week as well. She has been happy to drop things that she didn't like or that stopped working for her (horse riding, GS). We constantly edit and adjust based on her homework load because school is the priority.


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## Viola (Feb 1, 2002)

I'm not really sure, honestly. My 5th grader has 0 and my 10th grader has 1, but it's not really that simple. My 10th grader is in a performing arts program at a high school that is not that close to us. Unlike our zoned high school, this school only offers 6 classes in a regular period, plus a mandatory study hall. She is required to take 4 core classes, and she has 2 electives as long as she can get her mandatory things in, like health, computer literacy and PE. Usually the electives are used for the performing arts program, but foreign language is also an elective even though she has to take 2 years. She wants to actually learn Spanish, so she wants to keep taking it, but then there is no room for PE within the school day.

The good thing is that they do offer two extra periods, one before the regular classes, and one after, but just for the performing arts classes, so she takes drama after school. She is taking PE as an extracurricular activity in this upcoming semester, and so she'll have to do a class at least 3 hours a week to get the semester credit. And then she also sings in a community children's choir. Then there is church related stuff, like youth group and handbells.

But if she tries out for the school musical and makes it, then she becomes enrolled in a Theater Performance class that meets for an hour and a half every other day, which alternates with her Advanced Drama class. She she goes to school until 4:10 every day, and it can go until 6 pm on tech weeks. Then there is her school choir, and if she does stuff like County Honor Choir and All State Choir, there are rehearsals and performances for that for a couple months of the year.


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## sazza-w (Jan 14, 2015)

both my son and daughter do one activity each at the moment, my son does tennis after school and my daughter does gymnastics.

I would be happy for them to do 2-3 activities per week however they dont seem to want to do other ones and/or there isnt much opportunity in the area for them to do it.


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## Turquesa (May 30, 2007)

While DD was still in school, she did a weekly ballet class on Saturdays and nothing more. Now that we're HS'ing, we're part of a co-op where she can take ballet. So both of the older sibs are in mid-day ballet classes, and then both do late-afternoon swimming lessons twice a week.

I'm extremely possessive of our free time. I don't think that children get enough of it, even though creative play and unstructured play and social interactions are vital to their development. Children's days are pretty micromanaged between school, homework, extra-curriculars, and limited recess times. While we can't do the traditional "family dinner" with DH's work schedule, I look for ways that we can spend time together in the evenings, if even just over hot cocoa at the table before bed. 

What I'm sort of saying with all of this is that it's sad that schooling, homework, and activities have sucked the life out of our communities and minimized family interactions. None of the neighborhood kids can play with my homeschooled kids in the afternoons because they have homework and structured activities. (Now we just go to daytime social events with other hs'ers). 

I'm in no way suggesting that the 1950s, 60s, and 70s were overall "better" than today; nothing is that black and white. I'm also not slamming anyone whose kids are in lots of activities because there are more fun and enriching options these days than ever before. But I wonder if children were socially healthier when running outside to play with neighborhood kids after school was the norm. I also consider it important for families to "connect" with each other a little each day. That's why personally, I've been extremely judicious with extra-curriculars. But the hectic lifestyle does have a way of creeping up on us!


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## Turquesa (May 30, 2007)

meemee said:


> gosh. until we started hsing i had no idea how much school was 'killing' her. how much she needs the arts to balance out her interest in academics.
> 
> today all her studies are based around infectious diseases. her history project for middle ages is what were the diseases during that time and what did the rich people die of then (fascinating subject, and rich because they would have access to the best 'medical' care). her science project is researching why we dont hear of cancer of the heart. can the heart develop cancer?
> 
> however hsing IS a struggle. just to stay on task. and not enough social interaction - for the kind dd wants.


We're going through these struggles, too. I'm not sure how long you've been at it, but supposedly the first year is hardest. I'm in my first year, and it's been rough. We have our good days, and it does help that my kids feel strongly about wanting to be hs'ed. We were lagging in the social area, but that's sort of a matter of trial and error. We're fortunate to live in an urban area and have finally found a co-op that meets our needs with field trips and unstructured get-togethers.


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## pazatron (Jan 16, 2015)

we have a 1st & 3rd grader who both play soccer and attend a weekly yoga class. they're also girl scouts, but that's only a once a month meeting. two events a week are plenty for me, but my little social butterflies would gladly take on more!:dizzy


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## Serafina33 (Jan 24, 2013)

My 9 & 11 year olds have two sports each and then pursue an instrument in addition. That's 4-6 times per week they have an activity going on and the driving and picking up us exhausting! Thank goodness in the country we live in, school is over about 1pm so that helps not feel as over scheduled as it could. It's still too much.


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## bonnietulip (Jan 25, 2015)

My DS is 7. He has large group therapy and small group therapy (he's autistic). He will also soon be in soccer. 

If he were not autistic, he would likely only have the one activity (soccer).


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## fullofhope08 (Feb 16, 2008)

our 4 year old son started preschool this year - 8-2:00. He started going 2 days a week and we upped it to 3 days a week after the holidays. After spending his first 4 years of life with us or grand-parents, we decided on no activities for this year and next as he adjusts to preschool and kindergarten next year. He loves going and is doing well. I feel for him, that's all he needs at this point as his brain is absorbing plenty of new experiences and thankfully they get lots of time to play outside or in the gym. We will enroll him in soccer in the summer months as he loves it and it's a great opportunity to let off some steam. Once he's in first grade, not sure what his interests may be for activities, but we may look at introducing one.
As others have said, I also feel kids need time to run and play, time as a family. We are thankfully able to make sure nightly supper together happens and we make this a priority. We spend evenings and weekends together for the most part - lots of outside play and time at family camps in the summer with cousins, swimming and campfires. We are fortunate to have family around and opoortunities to spend time together so we take advantage of it. I know this is going to change as the kids get older, but my intention is never to become a taxi driver to my kids. I know thisis the reality for some and a positive lifestyle for some. But it's just not what we are looking for.
interesting topic and to see the different perspectives. There is not one right way for sure.


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## Sam24 (Jun 1, 2016)

*My nephew does martial arts*

My nephew does martial arts thrice a week. Martial arts actually help teach self-discipline and socialization skills. That's why my nephew started to learn self-control and concentration. He kept on doing this even if he's in our house. After a warm-up, he practice the art's particular skills, which may include kicks, punches and blocks. Each requires concentration and strict attention.


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## nathancrowley (Apr 11, 2017)

just piano lessons


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