# 45 lb 19-month-old (they say she's too big!)



## onelittlesleep

I have a big, happy 18-month-old who is very healthy and developmentally normal. But lately, a lot of people in my life, people I even have trusted in the past for parenting advice, are starting to look at her and question if she's overweight! And if I should do 'something about it'.

My husband and I are both stunned by this reaction to our healthy, lovely girl. Like there is something wrong with her natural size! To be perfectly clear, she eats a lot of fruit, some veges, chicken, yogurt, cereals...mostly, she's still breastfeeding a lot and grazes on solids off and on during the day. This is how I raised my son, with self-guided weaning and a slow intro to solid foods. That went just fine! And it seems to be going just fine for my baby girl, other than the fact that other people seem hyper-aware of her weight "problem".

SIGH. I guess I just came on here for moral support. Please tell me that I'm not crazy! That my daughter IS fine and that these other people don't know what they're talking about.

To be honest, I don't even know how I'd slow her weight gain if I had to! She's just breastfeeding, primarily! All that chunk is from breastmilk!


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## LadyCatherine185

How active is she? I only ask because 45 lbs at 19 months is quite big.. I weighed 45 lbs when I was 7 years old. I would probably talk it over with your ped, but as long as she seems healthy, active, and is developing normally, she is probably fine. Does she have any issues that could be related to thyroid? That can sometimes cause excessive weight gain.... I am not a doctor, so this is just my 2 cents.


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## carliec76

45 lbs is very large. My 6 year old is 45 lbs and he is in the 50-70 percentile. I don't know what to tell you. My 19 month old is 23 lbs and is a good healthy size. How tall is she? Your friends are right to be concerned. She could develop hip bone problems with that extra weight. Hopefully she will grow into it. I would have her thyroid checked just to be on the safe side.


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## AllyRae

Quote:


Originally Posted by *LadyCatherine185* 
How active is she? I only ask because 45 lbs at 19 months is quite big.. I weighed 45 lbs when I was 7 years old. I would probably talk it over with your ped, but as long as she seems healthy, active, and is developing normally, she is probably fine. Does she have any issues that could be related to thyroid? That can sometimes cause excessive weight gain.... I am not a doctor, so this is just my 2 cents.

I agree. 45 lbs is bigger than my almost 7 year old son and seems very large for a 19 month old (my 18 1/2 month old is 22 lbs, so that's my point of comparison). What does her pediatrician say? Thyroid problems and diabetes can both cause excessive weight gain (you say she eats mainly fruit, and some vegetables...fruits are pretty high in sugar, and although it's natural sugar, you *can* get too much of it...and if she has diabetic tendencies, it could be a problem). In addition, yogurt & cheese are pretty high in calories too (and the yogurt is high in sugar). And depending on the cereal, it may or may not be healthy cereal (are we talking about froot loops, or are we talking about homemade granola, for example)

Honestly, 45 lbs for an 18/19 month old *is* overweight. Now, whether overweight is normal for her, well, that's something you and her pediatrician know best. But yes, there are weight charts and yes, 45 lbs for an under 2 year old does indicate that she is over what is typically considered an appropriate weight.

How are her milestones? Is she sitting, standing, walking, running ok?

I'd get her thorougly checked out to make sure there is nothing wrong, and if all comes back clean, I'd just tell people that she was checked out, is fine, and that's her normal size.


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## EzzysMom

Yes I think you should do 'something' in bringing it up with your doc. You don't mention how tall she is, so she'd have to be really tall for this not to be drastically out of proportion. Even my DD's best friend was huge and still only 32 or so lbs at that age while being off the charts for height.


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## MoonStarFalling

I would have her fully checked out if she hasn't been recently already and talk to a nutritionist or holistic doctor specializing in nutrition etc. My DS was and is really big (over the charts for weight and classified obese) but still he wasn't 40 pounds until he was 3.


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## ellemenope

Wow, I am on the other end of the spectrum. I have a 23 pound 2-year-old.

In my opinion, at that age, I would not worry about being overweight. whenever I see big toddlers I think 'healthy'. I think they must just be getting everything they need. But, maybe that is because I worry so much about by little girl who eats like a bird.

You sound like you are feeding her healthy foods. I would imagine as she gets older she would slim out with that diet. The only thing I would reccomend would be more activity.

Your daughter sounds perfect to me. If you have any concerns about a thyroid issue or metabolic whatever, that is something you need to being up with her docotor.


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## Darlingricki74

That would be concerning to me, my son is almost 7 and weighs 42 lbs.


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## AllyRae

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ellemenope* 
Wow, I am on the other end of the spectrum. I have a 23 pound 2-year-old.

In my opinion, at that age, I would not worry about being overweight. whenever I see big toddlers I think 'healthy'. I think they must just be getting everything they need. But, maybe that is because I worry so much about by little girl who eats like a bird..


This is kind of sad. Toddlers *can* be obese, and in fact, there are a lot of obese toddlers. They become obese preschoolers and diabetic kindergartners. There are a lot of really young children being diagnosed with type 2 diabetes (which formerly was the "adult diabetes"). So yes, you can have an obese toddler.

And I say that as the mother of a FTT child (well, he was formerly FTT...now he's just a 42 lb almost 7 year old), and the mother of a child who is only 22 lbs at 19 months old. A child who is off the charts large and is twice the size as the average 19 month old most likely is not "healthy"...even if there is no medical reason for the large size, there is likely some chronic issues that will creep up. I mean, there may be the rare healthy 45 lb 1 year old, and maybe the OP's daughter is one, but if you see 100 45 lb 1 year olds, I would wager to bet at least 95 of those have medical issues either causing it or as a result of it.

In a nation where the majority of our children are now overweight and/or obese, it's probably about time to change the mentality that toddlers can't be obese. They can be. Some are. I'm not about asking a toddler to diet--I think that can be dangerous. But when something is so far over the average, it puts up red flags to me...that is one case where some metabolic, thyroid, and blood sugar testing is in order, for sure.

And it's fairly odd to look at a large child and think they are healthy and getting what they need....my small child is healthy and gets everything she needs as well. It's not like small or average sized children are being starved and large toddlers are being given what they need... A lot of larger children are being given far more than they need, or being given things that are not particularly good or needed for them (even if it's healthy for the average person, an intolerance can cause the child to swell/gain a lot of weight...)


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## journeymom

Are you sure she's 45 pounds?

There are all kinds of healthy for all kinds of kids. And I'm sure any other chart might give you a different answer, but this one indicates that your daughter is literally off the charts.

http://www.kidsgrowth.com/stages/vie...s.cfm?id=GW036

50th percentile for a 19 month old is 25 pounds. 97th percentile is 31 pounds.

You might want to make an appointment with her ped just for some guidance.

Best of luck!


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## AllyRae

I will say that it does depend on height too--are her height and head circumference proportional (meaning, is she somehow about 40", which would be phenominally tall for a 1 year old, but stranger things could happen?) If she's very very tall, then her weight would be proportional. But if she's only 32-33" or so, then 45 lbs can be an immense strain on her growing bones and joints.


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## onelittlesleep

My daughter is a very active girl! She keeps up with her active 7-year-old brother. She swims every day and runs around in the yard and in the house, plays with her dollies, climbs EVERYTHING. She started walking and talking very early, and hasn't stopped since.

Her body is very proportional. She has a big noggin! She looks solid, but not overweight. Mostly she just looks older than 19 months. She's between 40-45 lbs.

She eats mostly these things: breast milk, light soy milk (she seems to have problems with regular milk), cheeses, yogurt, cereals like unsweetened oatmeal and cheerios, rice, black beans, chicken, broccoli, eggs, melon, peaches, apples, unsweetened apple sauce.

I'm a very picky mom about what I feed her! We don't eat fast foods EVER or junk foods. She rarely has a few bites of homemade, fresh peach pie when I make it, but even then it's not more than a bite or two off my plate. She is not overfed, she eats when she's hungry. Often, I am paranoid I'm UNDERFEEDING her, because she'll go a whole day with a few bites of cheerios in soymilk and that's it!

Also, her daddy was a BIG baby. He was about her size at 18 months, a bit taller (her height is in the upper percentile, but not as high as her weight), but now he's 6'2" and very lean.

SIGH. I just think that, by all outward signs (other than her weight), she's very healthy, active, normal! Don't all babies-children develop at different rates, in different ways?

I'm sorry, but I am a bit disappointed that so many people seem to find my daughter abnormal.


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## EarthMamaToBe

Well Mama I don't mean to offend you but a 45 lb 19 months old IS abnormal. Does that mean she is unhealthy? Not necessarily. Has her pedi ever expressed concern about her weight?


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## AllyRae

I'm not sure why you'd be surprised that anyone would see that was abnormal though. I really don't mean any offense, but honestly, anywhere between 18 and 30ish pounds is what's considered normal for an 18 month old...your child is almost double the weight of an average 18 month old. So yes, that is abnormal. And you didn't mention her height or head size in your OP, nor your DH's size in infancy or her milestones, so all we had to go on was weight. And if you're looking at 45 lbs on an average height 18 month old, you're looking at a morbidly obese toddler. That's why other information, such as height and head circumference are important. Because a 45 lb 18 month old who is of average height for an 18 month old could not walk, most likely. And that would be a huge strain on an 18 month old's joints. But a 45 lb 18 month old who is the height of an average 3 year old due to family history of very tall individuals is a different story...


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## earthmama369

With that diet and the fact that she's still breastfeeding, I certainly wouldn't worry about my ability to feed her appropriately. It sounds like you're doing a great job. But 45 pounds at 19 months would have me bringing her in for an evaluation with the doctor. There is definitely a wide range of normal in height and weight, especially that early in life, but her weight is statistically far enough off the charts that I would want to just get it checked out and make sure nothing else was going on. For reference, my oldest tends to be smack dab in the 50th percentile and she's only just hit 40 pounds at 5 years old. She has a tendency not to gain weight for long periods of time (up to a year), and so I brought her in for an evaluation around 18 months of age just to make sure everything was ok. It turned out to be fine, but I felt very reassured knowing that she was absorbing nutrients appropriately and nothing was going on in terms of her endocrine system, pituitary gland, etc.


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## Amanda L

As long as she is growing in height and head circumference to match (or close to) her weight, I wouldn't worry about it. Yes, we live in an obese society. But there have always been perfectly healthy but overall larger than average individuals. There have to be children at the top and bottom of the charts to have an average that's considered "normal"!

By the way, I am typing this as I nurse my 17 month old 33+ pound extremely healthy son.


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## onelittlesleep

I should have provided better information, but I just assumed that people in this forum would think of me as a fellow Mothering-forum-type mom, who supports healthy eating, breastfeeding, attachment parenting, etc. I can get it when outsiders from my family think my daughter is abnormal, but when other mothers on this forum, who, on average, support and understand MANY seemingly 'abnormal' parenting and child-related ideas and experiences (breastfeeding past 6 months, cosleeping, child-led weaning), aren't any more open-minded to my experience and my daughter's experience, I'm frustrated.

I'm only a mother of two, but from what I've seen, there is no real 'normal' when it comes to baby development. My friend's child didn't start talking until he was almost 2, but now he's one of the smartest kids in his class, it just happened late for him.

And my son has always been the tallest kid in his class, and when he was 2-4, people always thought he was a year older than he actually was.

All babies are different. I don't think my daughter is abnormal. All outward signs say she's really healthy, and just different. I am with her all the time and a very attentive mother. I feel like I would recognize if this was a health issue.


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## nextcommercial

I'm also wondering how you are weighing her. Has her dr weighed her on their scale?

If she is indeed 45lbs, that is very big. I know kids do slim down as they become more active. That whole year between walking and around age 2 is a great time to thin out. So, I would imagine that will happen. But, very often, this can turn into a heavy pre-schooler.

My daughter was 40lbs in first grade, and she was an average size 6 yr old.

I think the people who love you most are actually concerned for your daughter. We love other people's kids, and aren't always being judgmental... but, are truly concerned. My sister in law would just come out and say "Something's wrong, you need to talk to your doctor". I'd be all offended, and sometimes I'd check with the dr, but sometimes I'd know it wasn't wrong.... my kid was just sorta weird. But, she said those things out of love and real concern.


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## VillageMom6

Quote:


Originally Posted by *onelittlesleep* 
I don't think my daughter is abnormal.

But she _is_... and you do not seem willing even to _consider_ the idea that there might be an underlying health issue that you are not trained to recognize.

Everyone around you is telling you that your daughter is exhibiting a visual sign that something might be wrong... she is twice the size of a typical toddler.

Okay, that might be perfectly normal for her. I hope that it is. You seem _convinced_ that it is. But you haven't addressed anyone's question about what a doctor's evaluation has indicated.

If a doctor sees her and runs bloodwork and confirms your beliefs that your daughter is totally healthy... awesome!!

But it would be a tragedy if she is actually diabetic and it gets ignored because you so desperately want to believe that there is nothing wrong.

As an aside, just because people aren't responding with the words you want to hear does not mean that they are being unsupportive. Everyone here wants your dear daughter to be healthy and wants the best for you.


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## MissNo

My oldest is 50 pounds, and four feet tall. She's 4 and a half. My youngest is 37 pounds, 3 feet tall, and 35 months old. My ped told me both of them were 'off the charts' and obese, and I know that to be untrue. Anyone can read a chart, see a number, and call her obese, or you can look at the child and see the entirety of her lifestyle to see that she isn't.

All babies are different, but to be not even two and the weight of a seven year old would concern me. Is she meeting milestones, or is she unable to meet them because of her weight? That would be the larger factor for me.


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## sapphire_chan

I would get her checked out. Since she's normally active and eating healthily, being so extraordinarily large could be an indication of a medical condition.

Now, if you or your husband are professional basketball players or otherwise huge and healthy and your kids are totally proportional for your family, I wouldn't worry. If that's the case, just point out that you guys aren't likely to produce tiny kids.









Ah, just read down to the update where you shared that your dh had the same growth pattern as a toddler as did your son. If it's a stranger, tell them to MYOB, if it's a friend or relation, point out that she's just part of the family.


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## AllyRae

Quote:


Originally Posted by *VillageMom6* 

If a doctor sees her and runs bloodwork and confirms your beliefs that your daughter is totally healthy... awesome!!

But it would be a tragedy if she is actually diabetic and it gets ignored because you so desperately want to believe that there is nothing wrong.

As an aside, just because people aren't responding with the words you want to hear does not mean that they are being unsupportive. Everyone here wants your dear daughter to be healthy and wants the best for you.

YES YES YES, to all of this!!!

We all want to believe our children are perfect. But what concerns me is that you don't even seem open to the idea that maybe there *is* something wrong that you can't see. For example, if I would have just accepted "that's just the way she is...yes, she projectile vomits all of the time, but babies spit up", I would never have taken the steps to find out that yes, my 18 month old actually has an immune deficiency that could be life threatening if ignored. If I would have accepted "boys and girls develop differently and every child develops at their own pace", I would not have been able to find out that my 6 year old is autistic...but because I was open to that possibility and he got intervention at 2 years old (and continues to), he is now functioning as a near-typical school aged child in many settings.

So, we all hope your daughter *is* healthy. But everyone around you is saying that something might not be right and it's really concerning that you're closing your ears and acting as if everyone's wrong. If we are wrong, then we'll happily be wrong, for sure. But if everyone's saying the same thing, it might be prudent to have it checked out. The best case scenario is that you proved everyone in your life wrong about it.


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## elus0814

I agree with most of the other posts. Her weight warrants a medical evaluation. She is about the same weight as my almost six year old, has several pounds on my 4.5 year old, and is nearly double what my 16 month old weighs; all of my kids are at least 70th percentile for height and are therefore a few pounds over what their peers weigh.

I don't think that your daughter is 'abnormal' but she does have at least one symptom (high weight) that could indicate a health problem.


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## onelittlesleep

My daughter was early with all her developmental stages. She walked much earlier than my son (at 10 months), she started talking right after a year...

I am sorry I spoke angrily, but it is offensive to me that someone would think I wouldn't notice if my daughter had bone problems. She's spry! She squats all the time, climbs everything without trouble, runs pretty fast, walks up and downstairs without holding onto anything (or tries to, until I catch her and make her hold my hand). I have NEVER seen her winded, though me and her brother get winded chasing her around.

She doesn't seem to exhibit any of the outward signs of a diabetic child, which I think I'd recognize, because my cousin's 5-year-old is a type 1 diabetic. I just...from the perspective of me (and so far, the doctors in our lives), she is healthy. She's not abnormally sickly or incapable of movement or weak or sleepy. She doesn't eat a whole lot, but she eats healthily. She still breastfeeds when she likes, so if anything, I might encourage less of that (which already isn't a lot!) and more running around with her brother (which she already does).


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## honeybunmom

Quote:


Originally Posted by *onelittlesleep* 
My daughter was early with all her developmental stages. She walked much earlier than my son (at 10 months), she started talking right after a year...

I am sorry I spoke angrily, but it is offensive to me that someone would think I wouldn't notice if my daughter had bone problems. She's spry! She squats all the time, climbs everything without trouble, runs pretty fast, walks up and downstairs without holding onto anything (or tries to, until I catch her and make her hold my hand). I have NEVER seen her winded, though me and her brother get winded chasing her around.

She doesn't seem to exhibit any of the outward signs of a diabetic child, which I think I'd recognize, because my cousin's 5-year-old is a type 1 diabetic. I just...from the perspective of me (and so far, the doctors in our lives), she is healthy. She's not abnormally sickly or incapable of movement or weak or sleepy. She doesn't eat a whole lot, but she eats healthily. She still breastfeeds when she likes, so if anything, I might encourage less of that (which already isn't a lot!) and more running around with her brother (which she already does).

None of us has seen your child. None of us can really play doctor to your child. What does her pediatrician say? If you say you haven't taken her, then, in addition to being on the bandwagon that something is quite possibly not right, I'll be jumping up and down asking why you would ask an online community who cannot see or evaluate your child about whether she is healthy or "normal" without asking her pediatrician first? I apologize if I missed it, but, have you stated in any of your posts that her pediatrician has advised that for her height and age that, although clearly not within the range of "normal", that your daughter is, despite her size, perfectly healthy?


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## CrunchyChristianMama

Quote:


Originally Posted by *VillageMom6* 
But she _is_... and you do not seem willing even to _consider_ the idea that there might be an underlying health issue that you are not trained to recognize.

Everyone around you is telling you that your daughter is exhibiting a visual sign that something might be wrong... she is twice the size of a typical toddler.

Okay, that might be perfectly normal for her. I hope that it is. You seem _convinced_ that it is. But you haven't addressed anyone's question about what a doctor's evaluation has indicated.

If a doctor sees her and runs bloodwork and confirms your beliefs that your daughter is totally healthy... awesome!!

But it would be a tragedy if she is actually diabetic and it gets ignored because you so desperately want to believe that there is nothing wrong.

As an aside, just because people aren't responding with the words you want to hear does not mean that they are being unsupportive. Everyone here wants your dear daughter to be healthy and wants the best for you.









Wise words.

It sounds like it very well may be just normal for her to be that weight. My DD is on the other end of the spectrum and just to be certain we ran some tests to make sure it was just normal for her. I thought it was, but I wanted to be certain because it was my child's health at stake. It may be worth it to take her to the ped, have him/her look her over, see if any tests should be run, and go from there. If they come back normal, then you will be able to tell anyone who feels the need to bring her weight up with you that you have looked into it, and that she's healthy! If they come back abnormal, then you can handle the situation however you see fit.


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## eclipse

My daughter was about 40 lbs at 2 years old (so older and lighter that your dd, but still out of "normal" range), but was also the height of a tall 4 year old. Her BMI also put ehr in the "overweight" catagory at that time (please don't get me started on how ridiculous BMI charts are for kids, especially ones that are tall for their age. A two year old is going to have more fat than a 4 year old of the same height, because they still have a toddler body type). Anyhow, she was my healthiest eater out of my three kids - "sneaking" raw veggies from the fridge between meals (she didn't have to sneak, she just thought it was fun), rejecting sugary foods in favor of healthier ones, etc. Anyhow, she eventually slimmed way down and after gaining some more weight eventually lost some as she got even taller, and until a couple of months ago was only around 43 lbs at 7 years old (she's recently gained about 10 lbs very quickly, which brings her to a more average weight for her height). Anyhow, my point is that if she's eating healthfully and she's active, there's probably nothing wrong and it will resolve itself as she gets older. I've known plenty of chubby and even "obese" toddlers that lived healthy lifestyles and eventually settled into a more normal weight. If your dd had a different kind of diet, I'd probably have a different opinion and advice to offer.

However, and this is a big however, because her weight is so far off the charts (and you said she's tall, but didn't say how tall - so if she's the size of a five year old, you can probably ignore this!), I think getting a complete check up and possibly blood work could be in order. It wouldn't hurt anything, and it could possibly catch something important that needs to be dealt with. It's just like if an adult had a high weight and was eating a healthy, calorically sound diet and excercising, but still maintaining a weight too big for their frame - there could be something hormonal going on that needs treatment. If a toddler were super tiny and way underweight, way outside the norm, the same sort of evaluation might be in order. If nothing else, if you get your daughter checked out, you can tell any concerned family members that she's been checked out by medical professionals and deemed healthy.


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## bronxmom

It seems pretty obvious that there are no lifestyle factors that are causing her to weigh so much - and based on family history it seems like it could be just the genetic pattern and things will even out. However, I'm having a hard time picturing a child that age (my son is that age) who weighs that much. It's 20lbs more than my big and tall baby boy so I have a hard time picturing it. I would allow the possibility that there is something else going on and just take her to the pediatrician to be checked out. I don't really buy into all the hysteria about weight in kids but I do think she's so far off the charts that it's worth checking into. Doesn't mean she isn't healthy but worth checking out. Also, I really wouldn't respond by limiting breastfeeding or worrying about her activity - her eating and activity patterns sound right on the money. If there's anything going on it sounds like it's purely medical and has nothing to do with your parenting. I think realizing that might make it easier to deal with the comments and realize that there's something worth checking out.


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## LadyCatherine185

I don't think anyone here is trying to say that it is anything _you_ are doing to contribute to her weight. She sounds like she is eating very healthy, etc. And if she is eating like you say she is, there may be some sort of disorder going on that only a doctor and some bloodwork can recognize.. because to be eating those things and be at 45 lbs at 19 months old.. something is probably not quite right.

Maybe it is your scale? I don't know. But my DS is almost 2, and weighs 31 lbs and is very chunky and always has been bigger than all of his "friends".. I couldn't imagine him 15 lbs heavier..

Please have her checked out by a doctor, a simple blood test can find thyroid issues, etc.


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## 2boyzmama

I'm going to agree that a thorough check by a Pediatrician is probably warranted, then you can definitely say that she's just following in her daddy's patterns. But, there's still information that hasn't been shared yet:

What is YOUR body build? Height/weight/childhood growth patterns?

What was her birth weight?

What has been her *pattern* of growth...steady, any major jumps? When did she double and triple birth weight?

What are her other habits...how often does she eat/drink/poop/pee/sleep? Those facts could clue in to anything underlying. If she drinks an inordinate amount and/or pees an inordinate amount, then that could be concerning. If she doesn't eat or drink much but is still this big, then that could be another clue.

There are plenty of "hidden" things that could cause excessive weight in a toddler, thyroid, diabetes, metabolic disorders, just to name a few. There are also kidney and digestive disorders that can contribute (my 5 year old lost about 4 pounds when we discovered his gluten intolerance and removed gluten from his diet. He wasn't overweight at all, he only weighed 44lbs, but within two weeks of removing gluten, he lost 4 pounds. It was fluid retainage in his digestive tract)

You haven't yet mentioned her actual height and/or head circumference. You also haven't yet said whether she sees a regular dr. I think that is all important information.

Most likely, she is a normal little girl, following her genetic growth patterns. But because of the seriousness of some of the issues that *could* be causing excessive weight, it is definitely worth checking into just to put everyone at ease. A few blood tests won't hurt her.

And I'm speaking from the "other end" of the spectrum, as a mom of a 3yr old who only weighs 25lbs, was 20lbs at his 2nd birthday. He has had every medical workup known to mankind because abnormal weight--on either end of the spectrum--can cause serious issues.

Oh, and the bone issues that were mentioned are not always obvious right away! It may take a few years of excessive stress on her developing joints before problems arise. A dr may be able to see subtle signs of it now (overly flat feet, hips or knees that turn in or out, joints that hyper extend, etc) or those signs may not show for another year.

Take her in, mama, everyone will feel better knowing that she really is healthy.


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## AllyRae

Quote:


Originally Posted by *LadyCatherine185* 
I don't think anyone here is trying to say that it is anything _you_ are doing to contribute to her weight. She sounds like she is eating very healthy, etc. And if she is eating like you say she is, there may be some sort of disorder going on that only a doctor and some bloodwork can recognize.. because to be eating those things and be at 45 lbs at 19 months old.. something is probably not quite right.

Maybe it is your scale? I don't know. But my DS is almost 2, and weighs 31 lbs and is very chunky and always has been bigger than all of his "friends".. I couldn't imagine him 15 lbs heavier..

Please have her checked out by a doctor, a simple blood test can find thyroid issues, etc.

ITA. You said she's not eating many solids. You said she's not nursing a lot. Even if your child was meant to be a 45 lb 1 year old, it takes calories to get to that point. If she's not eating that much, not nursing that much, and weighs that much, a doctor's visit is not unwarranted.

You can know your child as much as you want, but you can't always see what's hidden in blood. And type 1 diabetes presents differently than type 2. There are also other illnesses like Prader-Willi and Cushings Syndrome that can cause excessive weight gain, and you can't necessarily tell from the outside aside from weight gain.

You seem really resistent to have your daughter checked out. I get not being an alarmist. But I don't get not checking something out when it's clearly out of the ordinary. Especially if everyone around you sees the same thing.

Did she gain a bunch of weight suddenly, or has she always been far above the 97th percentile? Aside from birth-3 months, was she ever on the charts?

Does your MIL/FIL think your child's growth is abnormal? They would have seen something similar in your DH.


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## MPsSweetie

My ds will be 4 in a few months and he is a BIG boy! At 37 lbs. He looks about a year or two older than he is, and is very tall, but not chunky at all.

Can we see a pic of her?


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## laohaire

Well, maybe I'm a little cynical but I don't see the OP taking her DD in to see the physician as the magic bullet that a lot of people think. If her child is 45 pounds at 19 months, 99 out of 100 physicians will look at their chart and then tell the OP to put her on a diet. Period.

We're on the other side of it. My DD is almost 5 and she's about 32-34 pounds. That's around the 3rd-5th percentile. Every doctor who ever looks at her tells us to feed her ice cream, as much as she'll eat. Uh, yeah, converting her diet to sugar is a good way to feed a growing body. Apparently every calorie is equal, a calorie of ice cream will build her muscles and eyesight and organ functions and brain and immune system exactly the same as a calorie of steak or brown rice or whatever. And raising her on ice cream will lead to excellent dietary habits and health down the road. Sorry, I don't buy it, and I don't put a huge amount of trust in the average pediatrician's nutritional advice.

Now, am I saying that there's nothing amiss with the OP's daughter? No, I have no idea. Sounds like she could have a problem, sounds like she could be fine. OP, I'd encourage you to do the legwork yourself. Look at the WHO charts, especially weight for height (NOT weight for age): http://www.who.int/childgrowth/standards/en/

Are you familiar with symptoms of juvenile diabetes? I am not, but if I were you I'd have a look. Google conditions that might be related to unusual size in small children.

If anything rings a bell, go to the doctor and express the specific concern. "Could she have diabetes? Can we get a test?" (Or whatever).

But honestly, if you've done her legwork and she seems perfectly healthy than I would just keep on keeping on. Her diet sounds excellent (I'm frankly jealous, as the mother of a non-eater), her energy sounds excellent, and she has a family history of similar growth curves (we do too - both me and DH grew the same way that DD is growing, so we're taking a chill pill on it).

Oh, and I don't put much store by anecdotes but here's one for you anyway. My mother's best friend's daughter was 40 pounds by 18 months. Today she is 24 years old and the most gorgeous, athletic person I have ever seen in real life. Her being gorgeous is irrelevant but my point is that far from being obese or unhealthy, she is strong and active - so much that she has attracted the attention of some TV producers. She, too, was never "fat" looking, just a really "big" baby.


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## Grace and Granola

My first baby was a BIG baby who leaned out right after he started to walk. My second baby was a BIG baby who stayed a BIG baby for a long time! He was a big eater and moved more slowly than his older brother. Even though he ate a fantastic diet, I could SEE why he was heavier. He ate more and moved less. I was worried because at age 2 he was over 30 pounds. He weighed more than his 3yo brother. Now at age 3, he is about 45 pounds, still heavier than his older brother, and I still think he's quite heavy for his age, but I can see him leaning out.

The reason that I would want a medical evaluation for your daughter is that there is no apparent reason for her to be the weight she is. If she is eating healthy, whole foods, and physically keeping up with her brother, it seems that she shouldn't be that heavy. There is nothing wrong with what you're doing, but if all of these like-minded, supportive MDC mamas are seeing reason for concern, then perhaps you should think about getting her checked out....for her sake.


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## widemouthedfrog

I am tall, grew quickly, and had a 35-lb toddler who remained that weight until age 4, at which point she gradually gained 10 lbs. I also have a friend whose daughter sounds similar to yours - the child is built like a football player, as is her father.

However, if my child was growing in a way that many people deemed to be abnormal, I'd get her checked out, just to be sure. In my daughter's case, I grew exactly how she is growing and I am not at all concerned.

I also have type 1 diabetes and hypothyroid, which is why I am chiming in.
Hypothyroid is really, really easy to diagnose and is a cause of weight gain. I'd ask for the test.

As for diabetes, people have been throwing around the juvenile/type 2 terminology. Children with type 1 are usually too SKINNY since their bodies are burning fat and protein (muscles) instead of using carbohydrates, since they don't make enough insulin to use the carbohydrates as fuel. People with type 2 diabetes may or may not be skinny, but sometimes high body weight is a precursor to type 2, especially if it is combined with a poor diet, lack of exercise, and bad genes.

Anyway, all of that is likely irrevelant to your particular case, and I will get off the diabetes soapbox now!


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## EdnaMarie

I think you need to look at this from a medical, non-weight-issue perspective.

45 lbs is huge. I have no idea how tall she is, but that is enormous for her age, so either she is more or less proportional, in which case, she needs to have her growth hormones checked, or disproportionate (weight for height, we shall assume that she's not four feet tall!) in which case you need to look at why.

You mention that she has a big head... are you aware that there are certain syndromes associated with having a very, very large head (your daughter is like, 20 lbs over the norm, right? So we are talking even five lbs of extra head, that is... just a really large head).

I do not feed my kids the perfect diet and they are much smaller than your child. It's not merely a question of eating habits. There are many disorders that do need to be treated that can result in unusual size of children and adults, and this is not about "obesity" or "fat" or "weight issues". It's a growth issue and yes, if I were you I'd get it checked.


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## EdnaMarie

Quote:


Originally Posted by *AllyRae* 
ITA. You said she's not eating many solids. You said she's not nursing a lot. Even if your child was meant to be a 45 lb 1 year old, it takes calories to get to that point. If she's not eating that much, not nursing that much, and weighs that much, a doctor's visit is not unwarranted.

You can know your child as much as you want, but you can't always see what's hidden in blood. And type 1 diabetes presents differently than type 2. There are also other illnesses like Prader-Willi and Cushings Syndrome that can cause excessive weight gain, and you can't necessarily tell from the outside aside from weight gain.

You seem really resistent to have your daughter checked out. I get not being an alarmist. But I don't get not checking something out when it's clearly out of the ordinary. Especially if everyone around you sees the same thing.

Did she gain a bunch of weight suddenly, or has she always been far above the 97th percentile? Aside from birth-3 months, was she ever on the charts?

Does your MIL/FIL think your child's growth is abnormal? They would have seen something similar in your DH.

I agree with this, as well, especially asking your MIL/FIL about her growth and their family history, as well as your own parents.

And frankly, _if the doctor suggests a diet, get a different doctor._

Demand to see someone who will look at her growth hormones, her pituitary glands, her thyroid, and confirm that this is normal for her. If you're not worried, then don't worry, just do it in your own time.

But also don't get caught up in the weight-obesity-diet thing because not all growth is about that.

I am sorry if this is not what you wanted to hear.







But she is way, way off the charts and there is a lot you can do for children who are growing too fast to help their bodies develop in a more normal way that results in stronger bones, stronger organs, etc. etc.


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## an_aurora

Well, it seems "normal" to me, since her dad was similar in size at that age. Yeah, that's big, but not everyone can be 50th percentile









My son is also "abnormal" and tips the scale at 16 pound 3.5 ounces at one year old. And that's "normal" for him, and for us, since DH and DD2 were exactly the same way. We went through hell with DD2's pediatrician who gave us horrible advice about her size and even threatened to report us to CPS. Thankfully we have a new pediatrician who is wonderful, and we've gotten their allergies figured out so we can modify their diets and encourage them to grow, but we've never done the "high fat" or "pediasure" diet that has been recommended.

Honestly, the first thing I thought when I read the title was "ZOMG I hope they have a high-weight harnessing car seat"









ETA: My nephew was a similar size at 18 months (I think he was 42-43 pounds) and by 6 was 125 pounds. I remember being shocked that my first-grader nephew outweighed me, but his parents said the pediatrician said he's doing just fine. They do have very unhealthy eating habits, but it sounds like your DD's diet is just fine.

Our nutritionist uses the weight-for-height charts and says they are more helpful than the regular percentile charts. For example, DS is under the 3rd percentile for height, and under the 3rd percentile for weight, but more concerning is that he's under the 3rd percentile for weght-for-length--he's so tiny that even at his height (28") he "should" weigh more.

http://www.who.int/childgrowth/stand.../en/index.html


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## dakotablue

I think the term abnormal gets to use as parents. It in truth is not a terrible word...against the norm, but it sounds like we've done something wrong.

Your DD may be perfectly fine. You have mentioned a LOT of great reasons to not have any concern about her. What would the harm be to talk to a Ped jsut to do some checking?

Do you have access to your DH's childhood charts? I'd bring those with you if I could to show Doc.

Big head...My sisters Dh has a big head, her girls have big heads, it was expected...

Personally I would be a little concerned about the possibility of a metabolic disorder, as you've said she doesn't eat a lot and is mostly bf. It may be nothing, but I think what's the harm in checking?

Checking doesn't make you an alarmist. Putting a child on a diet without checking...That's just stupid.

Also, I agree with checking the Who height-weight charts. Age is not always the best indicator. Family history tends to be a better one.








it sounds like you are being a GREAT mama. I hope when DS is older I can do as good of a diet with him.


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## Latte Mama

I think what is most concerning is that according to the OP, there seems to be no dietary reason for the weight. Genetics alone should not get one to 45 lbs at that age. My DH is almost 6' 4" and has a big family and I'm not a small person either. My DS at 23 months is approx. 35 inches and 31 lbs. STILL not anywhere near the level of the OP's child and I have a boy who is older.

Yes, I'd get a full workup for the toddler. Hopefully everything is fine but what would be the reason to wait?


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## LadyCatherine185

Quote:


Originally Posted by *an_aurora* 
Well, it seems "normal" to me, since her dad was similar in size at that age. Yeah, that's big, but not everyone can be 50th percentile









http://www.who.int/childgrowth/standards/weight_for_length/en/index.html[/url]

But this isn't an issue of 50th vs 100th percentile. 45 lbs is WAY off the charts for a 19 month old.


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## an_aurora

Quote:


Originally Posted by *LadyCatherine185* 
But this isn't an issue of 50th vs 100th percentile. 45 lbs is WAY off the charts for a 19 month old.

Yes it is, but having two kids that are nowhere near "the chart", the charts don't mean so much anymore









Absolutely get bloodwork done "just in case", but not being on the chart isn't automatically panic-inducing


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## treeoflife3

I think that the best thing you can do to be SURE she is truly her own healthiest is talk to her doctor about having some tests done to be sure there isn't an underlying issue that might be silent or only whispering so you haven't noticed.

If her daddy was similar, and if she seems very healthy and her diet is great and so forth, then she could be at the very very outlying percentage of children, but that doesn't mean something isn't going on that is concerning.

I think talking to a doctor and keeping an open mind is a good idea. I wouldn't trust a doctor who just says to put her on a diet or wants to give her something to treat it without some strong testing, but a doctor who is willing to look at it from all angles and make some testing decisions before making any suggestions on how to deal with it is a good idea.

I'd do some research on different medical issues that could cause a child who is considerably larger than average. I don't know much about that, but I'm sure there are things that have to do with hormones that can create extra growth.

It really doesn't hurt to just make sure she is truly a normal healthy kid. Either you'll find out you are right or you'll find out that she needs a bit of extra help to even out and be healthier than she already sounds like she is. She sounds very healthy and very happy but finding out there is something underlying doesn't make you a bad mama for missing it before... it just means sometimes we don't know everything.


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## confustication

My 24 month old is off the charts for height, and has not yet hit 40 lbs. He's a big, stocky, solid little boy.

Trying to imagine him 6 months ago with an extra 10 lbs- even having been very tall would have just been an enormous strain on his still developing body. I would absolutely take her in for an assessment, and if the docsays anything about a 'diet' flee to someone who would instead suggest a food diary (keep one in advance of the appointment so there is something clear to look at together) and some blood work to see why your child is so large.

After everything is cleared- sure, it's a non-issue and you can fluff it off, but I think it's worth some testing and evaluation.


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## journeymom

This might seem like nit picking but it is not, it's an important distinction:

No one said _your daughter_ is abnormal. Many people concluded that her weight might be above the norm. This isn't personal, so don't take it that way.

Quote:

SIGH. I guess I just came on here for moral support. Please tell me that I'm not crazy! That my daughter IS fine and that these other people don't know what they're talking about.
You absolutely have a lot of support here! I don't know you, but most likely you're not crazy!!







But when even the uber-crunchy, free-thinking lot here at MDC says you should investigate your daughter's weight, then you might want to take note.

I don't think going to the doctor is a 'magic bullet' but it is ONE way to check up on your child's health. I guess you can categorically dismiss anything a doctor says, but it might help to have the opinion of a professional who has specialized in pediatric health.

And as far as putting stock in percentiles and charts, they are simply averages, which are numbers you really can't argue with. Yes, there _is_ a reasonable weight range for the average 19 month old. No, not every child falls within the range of average. When that happens it's a good idea to investigate _why._


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## babygirlie

Soy damages the thyroid and slows it down. If she has a thyroid issue that is not helping. I would see a doctor and at the very least if the doctor gives you the ok then you can tell people she has been seen by a doctor and he says she's fine.

My 15month old is 20 pounds and has a big belly. I can't imagine where she would stick another 20 pounds. Sorry I know you are doing good but it might be TOO good. A baby is not an adult and doesn't really need that much food especially on that super awesome breast milk.

I know how about you add up all the calories in the day. That might give you a more realistic idea of what's going into that tummy







Or write it all out exactly and someone here can do the calorie math.

Even vegetarians can be obese







Cereal isn't particularily healthy and soy is not. So that healthy grazing could definately be adding up.


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## blessedwithboys

my friend has a 21 mo who is probably about 40 lbs, but thats bc he was raised on formula with cereal in the bottle and now gets mcdonalds several times a week. he's abnormally large, in fact, he's so large he falls down a lot and has been in the ER with head trauma more than once.

it doesnt sound like your dd is in the same boat, bc you are nursing (PLEASE dont slow down deliberately before age 2. right now, bm is still the perfect food for her and the only one you can be sure is balanced perfectly for her needs at her age)

however, i will second the concern over soy milk. its really terrible stuff, even organic. i just had a very long menstrual cycle, which is not normal for me (i've been a 28 day girl for 20 yrs). i have been celibate for many years, so i wasnt worried about pg. i brought on my period by drinking a half gallon of chocolate soy milk. potent stuff, that phytoestrogen, and totally inappropriate in the diet of a baby.


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## Megan73

OP, if your little one is barely eating healthful solids on top of nursing, I'd wonder - unless you are making gallons and gallons of milk a day - where she's getting the CALORIES to weigh 45 pounds.
I would keep a food diary for a few days and bring it to your family doctor. "Diet" is the wrong response but it seems like it could be an endocrine or other problem


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## mamadelbosque

My boys are smallish I know (DS1 is nearly 3.5 and ~29#s, 37/38"; ds2 is nearly 1 yr and ~19#s, not sure on height...), but I still can *not* even imagine a 45# 19 month old. Thats just crazy big... and I'd get her checked out. There are various syndromes which make kids/people grow abnormaly via hormones/genetics. And it'd be worth checking into just to be sure. You don't want to get 5 or 6 or 10 yrs down the road and find out that theres a problem you could have started working on years ago.


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## Latte Mama

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Megan73* 
OP, if your little one is barely eating healthful solids on top of nursing, I'd wonder - unless you are making gallons and gallons of milk a day - where she's getting the CALORIES to weigh 45 pounds.
I would keep a food diary for a few days and bring it to your family doctor. "Diet" is the wrong response but it seems like it could be an endocrine or other problem

This is basically what I said. And NOT to offend the OP because I want to state my experience in years of nursing (the RN kind). I have had many overweight patients tell me how wonderful their diets are and that they don't eat much at all. I then ask them to keep a food diary for just one week, to please write down every single thing that they eat and drink, even nibbles. I'd say about 10% actually do it and most of them are shocked at the results.

It is well known that we a s a society understimate how much we eat and overestimate the exercise we get.

Again, if this little girl is truly not eating a lot then that should be even MORE worrisome. And did I miss a height? Was that given? OP, I think it would be really helpful to show a pic and you could get truly unbiased opinions, even blank out her face if you feel uncomfortable. MDC is full of caring mamas that want to help!


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## SubliminalDarkness

OP, I agree a lot with what everyone else has said.

I also wanted to offer the possibility that your in-laws' recollection of your DH's size may be off. There's quite a lot of things about my infancy/toddlerhood that my mom "remembers" one way and my dad "remembers" another. So it's hard to say which of them is truly right, though I usually err on the side of my dad.

Just a thought.


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## fairejour

Unless your 19 month old is about...say....40 inches tall, I would guess this is an issue that should be discussed with a doctor.

Here's a concern that hasn't been brought up, what are you doing about a car seat??? At 19 months she should still be rear-facing but clearly that isn't an option. Many forward facing harnasses top out around 45, right? How is this child traveling in a car safely?


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## sapphire_chan

Quote:


Originally Posted by *fairejour* 
Unless your 19 month old is about...say....40 inches tall,

If she were 43in tall (110cm), she'd be in the 85% for weight to height. Sorry, I was just looking at the chart cause I was curious where my dd was.

ETA: forward facing harnesses generally go to 50lbs or more. There's some question about whether forward facing harnesses are a good thing though, but that's a topic for another forum.


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## an_aurora

Quote:


Originally Posted by *sapphire_chan* 
If she were 43in tall (110cm), she'd be in the 85% for weight to height. Sorry, I was just looking at the chart cause I was curious where my dd was.

ETA: forward facing harnesses generally go to 50lbs or more. There's some question about whether forward facing harnesses are a good thing though, but that's a topic for another forum.

Of course a 19 month old should be harnessed! Nobody is going to argue with that. Here's a perfect kid for a Regent!


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## camracrazy

I think I can understand a little of what you are feeling, OP. The other day my dh looked at our youngest and commented, "She's getting a double chin. Looks like she's been eating too many snacks." I immediately felt defensive and I have to admit I've been stewing about it since. She's 33 months and weighs 30 pounds, so not quite the range you are talking about, but it really just jabbed at me that someone would sit there and make a snap judgement about the way I was feeding her. I think dh is comparing her unfairly to our middle dd, who is 5 and only weighs 37 pounds because of medical issues and FTT.

That being said, I think any extremes one way or the other (underweight, overweight, gaining excessive height, not gaining any height, etc) are worth looking at. There might be nothing there, but it's good to know for sure. I recently had a friend tell me about some problems her son was having and how if they had caught the issue earlier they may have been able to take a route that would have fixed the issue but now there's not a lot they can do about it. I felt bad for her because I know she's a good mom and if she had known she would have done everything she could have to fix it. Knowledge can be power in these situations.


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## fairejour

Quote:


Originally Posted by *an_aurora* 
Of course a 19 month old should be harnessed! Nobody is going to argue with that. Here's a perfect kid for a Regent!

I'll argue! A 19 month old should be REAR facing!!!


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## mammal_mama

My 5yo is very well-rounded and solid. I honestly am not one for doing weigh-ins or measurements, so I can't remember how much she weighed or how tall she was at 18 months -- I can only say that both my girls are very tall, and while dd1 is slender, dd2 has always been much more filled out.

When we were getting WIC, at one point the nurse said we needed to see the nutritionist at dd's next appointment because her weight was off the chart. But by that next appointment, she'd grown a bit taller so was no longer "overweight."

I honestly didn't think she was overweight before ... I just think there's a lot of paranoia due to the increase in childhood type 2 diabetes.

I'm like you, looking at my children's high level of energy and alertness, and knowing they must be healthy. Still, a blood workup wouldn't hurt anything and could set your mind at rest. I agree with those who've said to steer clear of any doctor who advocates putting her on a diet or limiting breastfeeding.

And please keep us updated!


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## an_aurora

Quote:


Originally Posted by *fairejour* 
I'll argue! A 19 month old should be REAR facing!!!

Of course she should be, but not in any US seat she can't, since the Radian XTSL has the highest weight limit of 45 lbs


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## accountclosed2

Quote:


Originally Posted by *journeymom* 
And as far as putting stock in percentiles and charts, they are simply averages, which are numbers you really can't argue with. Yes, there _is_ a reasonable weight range for the average 19 month old. No, not every child falls within the range of average. When that happens it's a good idea to investigate _why._

This. Really, as the mother of a teeny tiny who was off the charts the other direction, I say see a paediatrician - get a referral to a specialist of some sort.

I say this because we were pushed around by nurses and medical people who just based on DD's weight insisted we had to formula-feed her. I get so sick of the assumption being that if a child is off the charts, it must be because the parents are over- or under-feeding the child.

But look, I have found no evidence that a low weight or slow weight gain actually causes anything down the line (so much for all the threats of brain damage!). And, I think there is one reason that charting babies is important, and that is because it can be an indication that something else is wrong (with the child, some sort of condition, that is).

And what should be done, in my opinion, the only sensible thing, is to test the child! However, I think that is seen as a bit of a hassle - it is so much easier to tell the parents to monitor/limit/increase the child's intake. And if that worked - well, at least you know nothing is wrong







(but the exclusively breastfed infant is now formula-fed...).

In your shoes, I'd see a specialist. For us, everything got better after we saw the specialist ped (the man who happily prescribed Domp. - and believed it would work, and therefore told us to slowly wean off the donated breast milk. He was the first one who didn't stress about her weight). And once the tests are done (unless the doctor deem them un-neccessary and fine your child fine!), you can relax, knowing this is just the way your child is meant to be!


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## sapphire_chan

Quote:


Originally Posted by *an_aurora* 
Of course a 19 month old should be harnessed! Nobody is going to argue with that. Here's a perfect kid for a Regent!

Could've sworn I'd seen debates about head excursion, but I guess that was for older kids who could sit up well? Whereas with a 19 month old, it'd be full spine excursion without harnessing.

It really is too stupid for words that we don't have higher RF limits here. Obviously, not generally for 19 month olds, but there are thousands of 3 year olds who could be RF if they bumped the limits up 20lbs or so.


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## physmom

Quote:


Originally Posted by *sapphire_chan* 
Could've sworn I'd seen debates about head excursion, but I guess that was for older kids who could sit up well? Whereas with a 19 month old, it'd be full spine excursion without harnessing.

It really is too stupid for words that we don't have higher RF limits here. Obviously, not generally for 19 month olds, but there are thousands of 3 year olds who could be RF if they bumped the limits up 20lbs or so.

It's not just the weight, though. The height limits are quite... limiting too. I checked our carseat and it's 35 inches for height, which DD is already at, at 1.5 years old. We don't have a car and she's rarely, rarely ever in our carseat but still, it is annoying.


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## physmom

As to the OP. I'd just reiterate what others have said. It doens't hurt to get this checked out for piece of mind. FWIW, DD is at the very top of the weight AND height charts (since birth she's consistently stayed in the 92-97th percentiles). I don't have her 18 month stats because we haven't been to the pediatrician yet but she's probably 30-34lbs (we've weighed her on a homescale on occasion). She also is in the 97th+ for head circumference. So even being at the very top of height/head circumference she's still much less than 10lbs under your daughter. Also, both DH and I come from families where very, very few of the guys are under 6 feet (DH himself is 6 feet 2 inches). Honestly, I couldn't imagine another 10 lbs on her. She's already got a belly. We don't feed her any junk food (although she asks for it a lot and I know they give her some stuff at daycare but we bring healthy snacks with to limit that) and she's still nursing a ton. I'd say the vast majority of her weight is in her head, though.

The fact that you are still nursing and it sounds like she's eating healthy has to make you wonder what's going on. I think someone else made a very good point about making a food diary and really looking into blood tests. That doesn't make you a bad mom for not knowing exactly what's going on from just looking at your kid. That's the reason pediatricians are there in the first place is to help you figure these things out.


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## Jennajbug

I have read through most of these replies. As the mama of 3... One thing I haven't heard back in response from OP was had she taken baby to the Pediatrician?
It's simple, other's have questioned maybe baby is too big. and obviously you deeply question it as well or you wouldn't have posted here. No one on here is saying you are doing anything wrong, however sometimes as parents we are blinded by the beauty of our children and don't want to notice things.

I ask you again OP, have you taken baby to Pedi? and what did they say? if they said he's healthy perfect for size then no problems...

are you and or DH obese? I don't mean this in any insulting way, but these things are genetic.... good luck!


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## bronxmom

My partner who is a pediatric nurse said first that obviously you can't diagnose without knowing the child. But he did say it was highly unusual and that she should get checked out. He mentioned right off the bat that it could be that she has growth hormone, which makes kids grow unusually big. Whether that's a problem or not, and whether there's something to do to address it, both depend on the individual kid. But it's worth getting checked out.

I know the OP came on hoping for a resounding "they're crazy - trust your instincts" response and didn't get it so that must be frustrating. But I'm hoping you check back in and consider getting some specialized help. It's nothing about your parenting or lifestyle that's at issue - it's something biologically inherent it seems and is worth checking out.


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## sapphire_chan

Quote:


Originally Posted by *physmom* 
It's not just the weight, though. The height limits are quite... limiting too. I checked our carseat and it's 35 inches for height, which DD is already at, at 1.5 years old. We don't have a car and she's rarely, rarely ever in our carseat but still, it is annoying.

The overall height limits are BS since leg length doesn't matter at all. An_Aurora has a great tutorial about how to actually check that your child fits properly RF--i.e. with 1" of hard shell above their head. Ask in the safety forum.


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## Violet2

Some kids are just big. I have one of them. 50lbs at almost 3. 41". Hopefully she'll grow up some more before she grows out.









We offer a healthy diet, DD eats it or not but doesn't appear to eat more than any other kid.

It never hurts to check to be sure all systems are go and I would go to the ped. Beyond that keep doing what you're doing and if she doesn't seem to thin out, start trying to get her more active. That is what we are doing, focusing on activity and not worrying about the food. She can diet when she's done growing.

V


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## Sharlla

is she really tall? my 5 year old is 35 lbs
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## crunchy_mommy

I have to say that while I lean heavily toward 'trust your instincts' this is something I would want checked out. My DS has a minor birth defect that didn't become apparent until he was closer to a year. I thought he was perfect & seemed so healthy, so even bringing it up to the doctor was... tough. I didn't want to even CONSIDER that he might not be 100% 'normal'... But we ended up getting it checked out (just needed some bloodword & an xray) and now we are fully confident that it's not 'something to worry about' (and when someone comments on it we are able to calmly say, "It's just a birth defect, he's totally healthy, he can have surgery to correct it when he's older if he chooses.") I'm not clear from your posts whether you've had your DD checked out already. If you have, then just say, "The doctor says she's fine," or whatever -- that tends to shut people up.







Otherwise, I would strongly encourage you to have her evaluated -- for possible hormonal or metabolic issues, or maybe a thyroid issue... She is not at the very bottom or very top of the charts -- she's OFF the charts, and it doesn't hurt to just make sure there's nothing more serious underlying her size.


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## c'est moi

i wish the original poster would come back and update.

my only question at this point is why you seem hesitant, reluctant, perhaps even unwilling to consider a doctor visit when many like-minded mamas have suggested. perhaps i'm reading your most recent post wrong, but it doesn't seem like it's something you want to do. your daughter could be just fine. she also may need some kind of attention. a visit couldn't hurt, right?


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## journeymom

Onelittlesleep I hope we didn't scare you away.


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## beanma

I think it might be perfectly normal and healthy for her, but it does sound like her weight is clearly out of the realm of normal for most 18 mo olds. I have known some super big and super pudge babes, but I haven't met one quite that big yet, so it's surprising to me and probably to others as well.

It's kinda like a 8 yr old boy I know who is about as tall as I am (5'5"). He's gonna be really really tall. He has the genetics. Both his parents were over 6 ft and his dad was close to 7 ft. He's healthy and happy and his height is really not normal at all. It's not pathological or a cause for concern, but it's not normal.

Maybe y'all just grow 'em big and there maybe something to people being more concerned about it on a girl than on a boy, but it is pretty different. Was your son also in this weight range at this age?

If she nurses a lot you may just make some super premium milk. I knew a little guy one time who was the hugest roly poly baby I had ever seen. He was so cute with rolls and rolls of baby fat like the Michelin man. He was breastfed exclusively (mom's a LLL leader). Now, at about 5 yrs he's tall and slim and not a bit pudgy.

I can't really judge if she's healthy or not, but if your doctor and you and your DH both think she is then you're obviously going to be a better judge of her heakth than a buncha folks on teh interwebz.


----------



## ellemenope

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Violet2* 
Some kids are just big. I have one of them. 50lbs at almost 3. 41". Hopefully she'll grow up some more before she grows out.









We offer a healthy diet, DD eats it or not but doesn't appear to eat more than any other kid.

It never hurts to check to be sure all systems are go and I would go to the ped. Beyond that keep doing what you're doing and if she doesn't seem to thin out, start trying to get her more active. That is what we are doing, focusing on activity and not worrying about the food. She can diet when she's done growing.

V

I have already told the OP to go to the doctor if she is truly concerned...

but on the subject of big kids, my nephew was just above 30lbs at 18 months and he was solid. He did not look 30lbs. But, when you picked him up he felt like a brick. He wasn't tall. He was only maybe a half a head taller than my shrimp. And, he was not fat. He had no gut. He was just solid. He was dense. healthy.

So, I actually _could_ imagine him with a couple more lbs. Certainly, if he was taller and actually had some fat.

He was also bf and ate only healthy foods. His mom is well educated when it comes to all that. However he ate a lot and darn near everything you put in front of him. So, when I said I think 'healthy' when I see big toddlers (specifically under 2), I guess I was primarily thinking of him.

Also, he has hardly gained any weight in 6 months. He is growing "up" though. My DD has not gained much weight at all either for that matter.

I am hoping that the '45 lbs' is a bit exaggerated or that the scale is broken. I do trust the OP. If the OP says she is perfect, I believe her. My nephew was/is beyond perfect.


----------



## Arduinna

How are you weighing her? On an adult scale at home? Those can be notoriously inaccurate.


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## sapphire_chan

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Arduinna* 
How are you weighing her? On an adult scale at home? Those can be notoriously inaccurate.

Not quite as bad if you do the "hold the kid then subtract the adult's weight" method but definitely if she's standing on the scale herself, scales just aren't calibrated well at the low end.


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## marisa724

My DS2 was 33 lbs. at 18 months. He was consistently at least 2 lines *above* the 95th percentile line on those charts at the dr's office. Luckily our dr. was laid back and did not see anything wrong with his progression -- and once he got the hang of walking and running he slimmed down quickly anyway. Now he's actually ON the charts, LOL!

At 2 1/2 he's still around 34 pounds, and that puts him up at the top still, 90-95th%. 45 pounds is more like what my six-year-old weighs, and he's almost 4 feet tall.

I am guessing the OP hasn't been going in for well baby visits, or someone would've at least said something. I was also thinking that this was a "home" weigh-in -- my own home scale is at least five pounds off the dr's scale, I know this because I weighed myself on both one day last week.


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## mamazee

My dd was 35 pounds at 16 months. I don't remember how bit my older dd was at that age but she must have been about the same. The little one is still a toddler and still pretty solid, though she doesn't look that big. In addition to being a high weight, she's really tall. The older one though is now quite slender despite her chunky toddlerhood. She was still almost completely EBF at 18 months so it wasn't that she was being overfed.

I guess it seems like if she's eating healthy food and choosing for herself how much of it she eats, it's probably the right weight for her at this time. They lose a lot of it as they get older and start running around. But you could check with a dr. to see if there's some health issue that's causing problems. If you don't let her decide when she's hungry and how much to eat and whether to eat at any given time, then I would give her that power. I think we as parents (not specifically you necessarily as I don't know you, but generally parents I've seen) tend to really push eating with toddlers for some reason. Younger children too. "You need a few more bites" kind of thing.


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## carliec76

I don't think anyone is trying to insult you, just show you the truth. 45 lbs is grossly obese in a 1 1/2 year old. Having everyone tell it is all right is unfair to your daughter. No one is saying you are over feeding her or feeding her poorly. Just get it checked it is not healthy for her bones to carry all that weight.
Also you said you give her Soy. Soy is NOT healthy in the form that most Americans eat it. Soy can actually cause you to get fat by increasing the estrogen in your body and other factors. I would discontinue use and do some research on the truths about soy food products.

Here is one article on the matter but there are many more.

http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Myth-A...at?&id=1516579


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## TCMoulton

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ellemenope* 
but on the subject of big kids, my nephew was just above 30lbs at 18 months and he was solid. He did not look 30lbs. But, when you picked him up he felt like a brick. He wasn't tall. He was only maybe a half a head taller than my shrimp. And, he was not fat. He had no gut. He was just solid. He was dense. healthy.

So, I actually _could_ imagine him with a couple more lbs. Certainly, if he was taller and actually had some fat.

There is a big difference between an 18 month old weighing 30 pounds and one weighing 45 pounds - that is a 50% increase and I'm assuming would look dramatically different on a little body.

Regardless, unless we know how tall this little guy is there is no way to know how appropriate his weight may be.


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## Jilian

Quote:


Originally Posted by *onelittlesleep* 
I should have provided better information, but I just assumed that people in this forum would think of me as a fellow Mothering-forum-type mom, who supports healthy eating, breastfeeding, attachment parenting, etc. I can get it when outsiders from my family think my daughter is abnormal, but when other mothers on this forum, who, on average, support and understand MANY seemingly 'abnormal' parenting and child-related ideas and experiences (breastfeeding past 6 months, cosleeping, child-led weaning), aren't any more open-minded to my experience and my daughter's experience, I'm frustrated.

I'm only a mother of two, but from what I've seen, there is no real 'normal' when it comes to baby development. My friend's child didn't start talking until he was almost 2, but now he's one of the smartest kids in his class, it just happened late for him.

And my son has always been the tallest kid in his class, and when he was 2-4, people always thought he was a year older than he actually was.

All babies are different. I don't think my daughter is abnormal. All outward signs say she's really healthy, and just different. I am with her all the time and a very attentive mother. I feel like I would recognize if this was a health issue.

It has nothing to do with you not recognizing a health issue, you are a mom, not a doctor. My own son was born with a CHD and I did not know, that doesn't make me a bad mom it means I'm not a cardiologist. Please don't be offended by the responses, no one has claimed that you are not a good mother or that you don't practice AP. Based on the info you have provided I agree that, yes, 45 lbs at that age is quite high and personally I'd want to bring her in to rule out a few things. Just for a little perspective: my 7.5 yr old son is 50 lbs and he's of average size. The fact that you've posted makes me think that maybe in the back of your mind you worry that something may be off too.


----------



## ellemenope

Quote:


Originally Posted by *TCMoulton* 
There is a big difference between an 18 month old weighing 30 pounds and one weighing 45 pounds - that is a 50% increase and I'm assuming would look dramatically different on a little body.

Regardless, unless we know how tall this little guy is there is no way to know how appropriate his weight may be.

You are right, but that was not my point. My point was that he was so darn heavy for not looking it. He did not look much bigger than my 19 lb 19 month old at the time and was over 10 lbs heavier. I want to say he was 32 lbs or so. So, anyway... He was just dense. That is what I want to stress. Had he been taller and actually looked chubby on top of being dense he could have easily weighed 40lbs.

So, yeah, I actually can imagine a healthy looking 40 lb 19 month old. My other point was that my nephew gained weight like it was his job up until about 19 months and then completely stalled out.


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## Viola

I've known people who have had large babies and toddlers, a baby who weighed 24 lbs at 3 months, another who weighed 33 lbs at a year, and they basically just grew into their weight and are lean now at an older age. So I don't know if 45 pounds at 19 months fits into that or not. Are you taking your child in for regular check-ups, and if so, what does the doctor say?


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## 98741

I am not a doc person, I don't do well childs or things like that. I also believe that, from what you posted, you are feeding her well with breastmilk and healthy foods. It sounds like she is getting good activity and you are doing all the "right" things. It is because of all of that, that I would actually agree with everyone else to have her checked. She is very much out of the range of normal and there is no obvious reason for it. That is why I think it's worth checking the medical side, just to certain/safe. There is no way for you to know if there is a thyroid or adrenal or hormonal problem. That is not poor/neglectful/oblivious parenting, those are unseen things. There would be no way for you to know them. I hope that you are able to sit with the feedback you have been given and recieve it in the spirit it was intended, even though it is certainly not what you were expecting or wanting. I hope that you will have your DD evaluated to rule out any potential issues and you could then deal with them or feel certain in the fact that she is just a large child and this is her normal.

Best wishes OP.


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## LROM

Looks like OP checked out of this thread awhile back (unless I'm missing a post) but it really stands out to me that at no point did OP indicate whether she's had this conversation with her Ped!

OP, just in case you're still reading, you go through great lengths to say you'd know or notice if your DD had medical issues. The bottom line is, you are not a Ped, and while by no means do I think Ped's are all-knowing and always right, they DO have an area of expertise that can be very useful (even necessary) with questions like this.

It troubles me that you don't or won't just take your DD to your Ped and ask their opinion. You don't have to do anything you're horribly uncomfortable with (like some said your ped will say "put her on a diet") - you should simply ask what the medical consequences of following and not following your doc's advice are and then use your best judgement in the best interest of your child.

And that's all IF you even disagree or are concerned with what your Ped says - you may not even feel that way!

But the bottom line is your DD **IS** way off the charts on the weight chart and why would you NOT want to make sure you've gathered all the information that could be relevant about her, for her own health? Again, you can do more research/ask more experts/do whatever follow up you need to if you are concerned about the response. But your daughter is not within what most charts consider the "normal" weight range, and despite the fact that your husband had a similar pattern, why wouldn't you check it out with your Ped?

Last thing, it's certainly a good sign and hopeful that your DH did have that same pattern. Seems very possible nothing is wrong at all, you just have a girl who is much bigger than most her age, end of story.

But what if there's more to her weight than that, and she's got a condition you could be doing something about? It seems more about you than your DD that you would hold so firmly to *your* opinions and feelings about this while refusing to ask someone whose career is supposed to be about helping kids to be ok.


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## JBaxter

I just finished looking through the thread. I have big boys but none have gotten to the size of your dd. I would ask your ped for some testing. There are many things that can cause growth like that. I didnt see where you posted how tall she is. My DS4 is off the chart in height and was about 30lbs at his 18 month check up.
There are some genetic things that can come into play and some way more serious things like tumors on the putitiary gland .... I would be worried sick till I found out for sure that there wasnt some underlying cause in her rapid growth. Hugs to you and your family.


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## mammal_mama

I can understand that if the OP's not doing well child visits and not wanting to go the whole medical route if not absolutely necessary, she may not feel this situation warrants a doctor visit. Remember, she is with her child all the time and she sees how healthy she is. We really don't know her child or even how tall her child is.

Yes, she posted here in order to to get some feedback from other AP mamas. Now she may be stepping back to just watch her child and see, and process all the information she's been taking in.

I remember when I started feeling a growing concern that one of my own children had some special needs. At first I was scared to have her evaluated because I literally thought that if someone felt medication or treatment was warrented, I could be pressured into it or seen as a neglectful parent.

I found out that this doesn't seem to be the case -- at least for kids with sensory issues; the resources for helping special needs kids are so overloaded that they honestly don't hunt you down if you decide that what they have to offer isn't the right thing for your child. It's easy to drop out.

But I'm honestly not sure if it's so easy to drop out of the medical system if the doctor feels that your child is too heavy. I recall some news story several years back about a little girl who was taken, screaming, from her parents and placed in foster care because she was obese and they wouldn't make her diet.

I realize that's an extreme response, so I'm not saying it's even likely, but it doesn't seem exactly far-fetched, to me, for a parent to have concerns about what might get set "in motion" if they seek medical advice but then decide to drop out.


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## ErinYay

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mammal_mama* 
I recall some news story several years back about a little girl who was taken, screaming, from her parents and placed in foster care because she was obese and they wouldn't make her diet.


This story? Long story short, this 3-year old-weighed 130 lbs, and was removed from her parent's custody. Mind you, they'd been seeking answers to her size (not just weight- she was 3x heavier than an average 3-year-old, but also 50% taller, and had a full set of teeth by a year of age,) since she was a few months old, and all doctors were perplexed.

After they were told to cut her down to 500 calories a day (and failed to do so) the child was taken into state custody. After a legal battle, starring many volunteers, they got the child back. 4 years later, she weighs 105 lbs, is on a fairly restrictive diet, and is in a swim club 3 days a week. So, at 7 years, she is still heavier than most kids her age, but is in good health, as was she at the time of her removal.


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## Anandamama

Dear OP, Looks like you've gotten an earful here. I just want to say that my baby girl was a huge 32lb at 10mo, and at that age exclusively breastfed. I got comments frequently about how big she was and friends and family saying, are your sure she's healthy and normal? I knew of big babies, but none even close to ours. Our pediatrician recommended taking her to a pediatric endocrinologist to have her tested. My intuition said that she is totally healthy and going was a waste of time, but for peace of mind we did it, and the tests came out normal. She's now 3.5 yo and tall for her age and just normal/stocky. So I hope the story is the same for you and your girl! Your feeling that she is healthy is probably right on.


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## mammal_mama

Yes, Erin, I think this is the story that I was thinking of. Thank you for the link to that great article! I'm glad to hear that she was reunited with her family two months later, though of course it's awful that she had to spend even two months in foster care.


----------



## Latte Mama

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Anandamama* 
Dear OP, Looks like you've gotten an earful here. I just want to say that my baby girl was a huge 32lb at 10mo, and at that age exclusively breastfed. I got comments frequently about how big she was and friends and family saying, are your sure she's healthy and normal? I knew of big babies, but none even close to ours. Our pediatrician recommended taking her to a pediatric endocrinologist to have her tested. My intuition said that she is totally healthy and going was a waste of time, but for peace of mind we did it, and the tests came out normal. She's now 3.5 yo and tall for her age and just normal/stocky. So I hope the story is the same for you and your girl! Your feeling that she is healthy is probably right on.

The good thing is that you DID get her checked out . That's all everyone is encouraging the OP to do. Just check things out for the same peace of mind that you did


----------



## eclipse

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ErinYay* 
This story? Long story short, this 3-year old-weighed 130 lbs, and was removed from her parent's custody. Mind you, they'd been seeking answers to her size (not just weight- she was 3x heavier than an average 3-year-old, but also 50% taller, and had a full set of teeth by a year of age,) since she was a few months old, and all doctors were perplexed.

After they were told to cut her down to 500 calories a day (and failed to do so) the child was taken into state custody. After a legal battle, starring many volunteers, they got the child back. 4 years later, she weighs 105 lbs, is on a fairly restrictive diet, and is in a swim club 3 days a week. So, at 7 years, she is still heavier than most kids her age, but is in good health, as was she at the time of her removal.

I went looking for an update on this story, because I remembered it, but it seemed like more than 4 years ago. I was right - here's a newer update on her if you're interested http://rdmag.com/News/FeedsAP/2010/0...s-with-weight/ It's been 9 years - she's 12 years old, 5-3, and 300 lbs. She has finally been dx'd as diabetic and put on Metformin which has stopped her weight gain (although she isn't losing). Unless she and her parents are completely lying to everybody, she is eating a majorly calorically restricted diet and excercising frequently andstill not losing any weight. There's obviously something medical going on, but nobody has been able to tell them what (aside from the new diagnosis of diabetes). The details of their case with social services are really horrifying







. Racism and classism played a huge part in her removal from her family







.


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## arihillfarm

Quote:


Originally Posted by *fairejour* 
I'll argue! A 19 month old should be REAR facing!!!

Yes, but if there's not a seat available that she can be in RF because of her weight, FF it must be.

-Astrid


----------



## MrsBone

Quote:


Originally Posted by *VillageMom6* 
But she _is_... and you do not seem willing even to _consider_ the idea that there might be an underlying health issue that you are not trained to recognize.

Everyone around you is telling you that your daughter is exhibiting a visual sign that something might be wrong... she is twice the size of a typical toddler.

Okay, that might be perfectly normal for her. I hope that it is. You seem _convinced_ that it is. But you haven't addressed anyone's question about what a doctor's evaluation has indicated.

If a doctor sees her and runs bloodwork and confirms your beliefs that your daughter is totally healthy... awesome!!

But it would be a tragedy if she is actually diabetic and it gets ignored because you so desperately want to believe that there is nothing wrong.

As an aside, just because people aren't responding with the words you want to hear does not mean that they are being unsupportive. Everyone here wants your dear daughter to be healthy and wants the best for you.


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## paxye

I don't know if you are still reading but my last son was an over weight (obese) baby... so, I have been there, and have gotten all the stares and concerns from others.

He was born at 10lbs, was 20lbs at 10 weeks, 30+ lbs at 6 months and 42-43 lbs at a year. So he was not far off from your dd but 6 months younger.

He was not overfed as he was exclusively breastfed until 10 months. He hit all his milestones at an average age...crawling at 7 months, walking at 11 months... though he could roll over until he was nearly a year because he couldn't get the momentum... but it did come...

We did decide to go get him checked out when he was about 9-10 months old. I had to turn him around in his seat by that time, he wasn't eating yet and was still gaining... We went to the specialists at the Children's Hospital and there was nothing wrong with him... he was just a big boy and this was HIS normal...

His weight stopped climbing at about 14 months and he started growing more in height and even lost a bit of weight... Now he is nearing 4 and is the same weight as when he was 12 months old. He is much taller than his brothers were (he matches their heights a year before they did) and for the first time since he was a few weeks old, his bigger brother is now heavier than him.

I don't regret going to get it checked out because not only was it reassuring but it was a great way to make people stop talking...

BTW... here is the link to my son's photo album... If you start on the last page you can see the chub grow... http://www.flickr.com/photos/paxye/s...7594399388645/

Quote:

Fairejour
I'll argue! A 19 month old should be REAR facing!!!

Quote:


Originally Posted by *arihillfarm* 
Yes, but if there's not a seat available that she can be in RF because of her weight, FF it must be.

-Astrid

I agree... I had to turn my son around at about 9 months though I technically should have done it before.

The highest RF car seat at the time in Canada had a sticker of 30lbs. The radian was still pretty new and I knew it had a sticker weight of 35lbs in the States so I bought so it knowing that I would have 5lbs more (though not legal) and then stretched it out even a bit more until I could no longer justify the risk.


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## 2xy

I agree that a doctor's visit is in order. If the baby is average height and 45 lbs, then the baby is way too heavy. If the baby is proportionately tall, then there may be a growth disorder underneath it all.

Reading all these posts made me go look in my kids' baby books to see their weights. DS1 was over 9 lbs at birth and was a sturdy toddler and preschooler. He weighed 27 lbs at 18 mos, and didn't hit 45 lbs until he was 6yo.

DS2 was a 7 lb newborn and chubby baby, but toddlerhood thinned him out and he has always been a skinny-mini. He was 22 lbs at 18 mos, and I apparently stopped recording his height in that book when he was 8yo....and he was only *42* lbs!







He is now 15yo and only weighs about 110 lbs (and is about 5'6").


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## Abraisme

Quote:


Originally Posted by *VillageMom6* 
But she _is_... and you do not seem willing even to _consider_ the idea that there might be an underlying health issue that you are not trained to recognize.

Everyone around you is telling you that your daughter is exhibiting a visual sign that something might be wrong... she is twice the size of a typical toddler.

Okay, that might be perfectly normal for her. I hope that it is. You seem _convinced_ that it is. But you haven't addressed anyone's question about what a doctor's evaluation has indicated.

If a doctor sees her and runs bloodwork and confirms your beliefs that your daughter is totally healthy... awesome!!

But it would be a tragedy if she is actually diabetic and it gets ignored because you so desperately want to believe that there is nothing wrong.

As an aside, just because people aren't responding with the words you want to hear does not mean that they are being unsupportive. Everyone here wants your dear daughter to be healthy and wants the best for you.











My 6.5yo only weighs 43lbs..


----------



## EdnaMarie

Quote:


Originally Posted by *paxye* 

BTW... here is the link to my son's photo album... If you start on the last page you can see the chub grow... http://www.flickr.com/photos/paxye/s...7594399388645/

.

Off topic, but I envy your photography skills and dang that baby is cute but huge at some points. I am sure the OP's is just as beautiful!


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## weezix

my ds is 28 months old and 36+lbs. He's not overly tall, just stalky. my dd is 4 and she's 45lbs. she's tall though.
i think there is a big difference between 40 and 45 lbs. you mentioned your daughter was within that range. i would think if she was closer to 40 and proportionate and meeting milestones in a normal range, then there wouldn't be anything to be concerned about but might mention it to my dr. on a regular check up just to be on the safe side. i think 45 lbs at that age is really getting up there so again, i wouldn't really be concerned but would make a visit to see the dr. just to check her out.


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## Lilypie32

My son is 44 pounds and will be 6 in November. How tall is your child? Have you had her checked by her pediatrician for growth disorders? Most of them are not visible and testing would need to be done. If she is mostly breastfed I would be worried and would seek out medical advice just in case.


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## sillysmile

I agree that you should really get a doctor's evaluation. Type 2 diabetes is caused by obesity, and is appearing in younger and younger children. Your daughter is at very high risk due to her weight. I realize that this sounds harsh, but if your daughter for some reason eats more than she needs to (underlying medical issue?), it is YOUR job to get the help that you need to figure out what is going on, correct it to the extent possible, and help reduce her risk of diabetes. How will you feel if you do nothing now, and come kindergarten she needs multiple shots of insulin to get through the day? (Note: I am not a doctor yet, but am 8 years into a MD/PhD training program and specialize in diabetes.)


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## Xerxella

Have a doc check her out. ESPECIALLY, if she's eating healthy. My friend's 8 yo didn't seem to be getting any taller. Well, he'll just be short, right? His parents are short. Well after a few years, it was really becoming obvious that he wasn't growing. He had a pituitary tumor. It was removed and he has started growing again. Natural death autopsies reveal that up to 25% of the population has undiagnosed pituitary tumors.

http://www.eje-online.org/cgi/reprint/140/5/378.pdf

These people are usually older and the tumors are usually asymptomatic, but it just shows the frequency of these things.

I was just thinking to myself, "I hope I didn't scare her." But, actually, I hope I did scare you. Go to a doctor and get your child checked out. It's probably just your child's way of growing, but go ahead and make sure.


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## lach

What a weird resurrection of a very old thread...

(OP, did you ever take your DD to the ped?)


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## MommyKirsten

Hi Honey,

After i read what you wrote I signed up specifically to respond to you. I know exactly what you're going through and I completely sympathize with you!!!!! My daughter is 24 months old and she weighs 44lbs. I get a lot of unwanted and unwarranted advice from almost everyone however if they actually knew how active she is and just little she eats they might think twice about their comments. My munchkin is an extremely picky eater (eating mostly strawberries, blueberries, multi-grain cheerios, eggs, boiled chicken, spinach and she will only drink skim milk). It is definitely not the food she eats or lack of activity!

I started to worry about her weight when she was around 18 months and I talked to my pediatrician about it. Luckily my pediatrician is a very compassionate and caring doctor and she told me that chances are she has a slow metabolism and it might be due to some hormonal issues which run in the family (that we are now currently looking into).

My husband and I are both chubby people and I grew up extremely active (competing nationally in synchronized swimming and then in Ballet) and I have fought my weight my whole life. Even while training 40hours a week and being active I was still gaining weight. They finally determined that I had hypothyroidism and think that my daughter might have the same problem although it is hard to determine in such a young child. So unfortunately my daughter might just have a weight issue due to genetics. I fear for her because I know how hard it is to grow up chubby.

I know what it is like to have people tell me what they think I should be doing, or what they think the problem is when they have no idea what is actually going on. My husband even had a woman stop him in the grocery store to tell him that our daughter was fat. Had it been me who heard the comment I'm pretty sure that woman would be lacking her front teeth but I digress.

People can be cruel, but by the sounds of it you're doing everything right. Just know that there is someone out there who knows what you're going through. I may not have all the answers but in my opinion as long as our kids are healthy and happy don't worry too much about the rest. You sound like a very caring and dedicated mom so keep doing what you're doing!

Sending you big hugs,

Kirsten


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## mammal_mama

Hi Kirsten,

I just wanted to say thank you for joining MDC and sharing your story! I hope the OP will come back and update us!


----------



## Sharlla

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *lach*
> 
> What a weird resurrection of a very old thread...
> 
> (OP, did you ever take your DD to the ped?)


less than a year doesnt constitute as being very old in my book


----------



## hannybanany

I'd love to see the OP post again. A lot can change in 10 months.

My DD1 was 33lbs at a year, 35 at 15 months, topped out at 37 at 17 months and was back down to 28lbs at 24 months. She started eating more than just a bite of solid foods at 17 months, that's the only thing that changed around that time.

We did not have any testing done because we saw her dr for regular well baby visits and he was absolutely not concerned about her weight at all. Now she's 5.5 and in the 90th% for both height and weight. She's just a big kid. If our doctor had been concerned, or we didn't see the dr regularly, we would have requested to have some bloodwork done, just for our peace of mind.

On the other side is DD2. At 12 mos she was 19lbs, 24mos 22lbs. Again, she was hitting milestones on target or early she was (is) just small. That's just her size.


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## genk2009

I'm sure she was fine, right? I'd like to get in touch with you. My one year old is currently in a similar situation. Can't figure out how to private message on here!


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## journeymom

The drop-down box under her name includes private messaging. Unfortunately the OP stopped posting on MDC altogether with this thread, 2 and a half years ago. I think she really didn't come back!


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## op here

Yeah this is the OP here like, years later and I just want to drop a big ******* to all the fatshaming, ridiculous concern trolls on this post who basically assumed I was a shitty parent and my daughter was dying of diabetes because of her size.

She is an incredibly healthy little girl and just stretched out from there, always tall, always healthy, always the biggest, smartest kid in her class. 

You all were completely useless to me and completely ignorant of the fact that healthy children can come in so many different sizes and shapes. Please please stop offering people shitty parenting advice based on NOTHING (there is NO science or here!), it was so harmful to me at a very vulnerable time in my parenting.


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## mammal_mama

I'm glad your daughter's doing well.


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## tinuviel_k

I am glad to hear that your daughter is well, but sorry to hear that you feel that doctor check ups are "shitty parenting advice."


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## Polliwog

Sandy?


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## ashleyanna

I'm years late to thos discussion, yea yea yea I know. I also joined just to post this. My daughter is 18 months and 43 lbs. Healthy as can be. Walkin at 10 months, developmentally ahead, and cute as a button. A few weeks ago she saw an endocronologist (idk if thats spelled right-not the point), they checked her growth hormones, thyroid, and a bunch of other stuff. Fyi to all you idiots suggesting type 2 diabetes, little kids dont get it. Ask a doctor. Anyway, my baby is (as I've always known), perfect. She nurses a lot, and eats some. The doctor suggested I cut back on nursing, which I am doing. My point is, although I'm years late to this poor mom getting slayed by you *****, in the future SHUT YOUR MOUTHS. None of you are doctors, or have any idea what your talking about. Glad I've never had anyone make such disgusting rude comments about my sweet girl before, or I'd probably be in jail. Kids come in all shapes and sizes, and to damn a mother for doing a good job raising a good healthy beautiful kid makes me sick. Puke on you. Our kids would survive the apocolypse.


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## TCMoulton

ashleyanna said:


> I'm years late to thos discussion, yea yea yea I know. I also joined just to post this. My daughter is 18 months and 43 lbs. Healthy as can be. Walkin at 10 months, developmentally ahead, and cute as a button. A few weeks ago she saw an endocronologist (idk if thats spelled right-not the point), they checked her growth hormones, thyroid, and a bunch of other stuff. Fyi to all you idiots suggesting type 2 diabetes, little kids dont get it. Ask a doctor. Anyway, my baby is (as I've always known), perfect. She nurses a lot, and eats some. The doctor suggested I cut back on nursing, which I am doing. My point is, although I'm years late to this poor mom getting slayed by you *****, in the future SHUT YOUR MOUTHS. None of you are doctors, or have any idea what your talking about. Glad I've never had anyone make such disgusting rude comments about my sweet girl before, or I'd probably be in jail. Kids come in all shapes and sizes, and to damn a mother for doing a good job raising a good healthy beautiful kid makes me sick. Puke on you. Our kids would survive the apocolypse.


Actually you are the one giving out bad information - children can and do get Type 2 Diabetes and the number of kids affected yearly is on the rise.

http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/type-2-diabetes-in-children/basics/definition/con-20030124


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## Viola

I would like to remind some users here of the User Agreement, which is something you should be aware of upon joining this community.



> Attacking or Name Calling
> 
> Hate posts and personal attacks will not be tolerated. Treat others as you would want to be treated. Attacking someone to provoke a negative response is not allowed. We ask that you post with a "no namecalling, no attacking, no insulting remarks" understanding. Discuss the topics, not the person or people.
> 
> Trolling and Agenda Posting
> We are all entitled to our opinions, including those that are negative about a topic. But if you are knowingly or purposely posting to incite negativity and anger from the community, you will be removed. If your posting behavior shows an agenda-based motive serving only to argumentativly debate with community members you will be removed.
> 
> Profanity
> Offensive language is unacceptable and your post will be removed.


- See more at: http://www.mothering.com/articles/user-agreement/#sthash.oFEq4TGJ.dpuf


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## Ashley4490

Hi! I know you posted this about your 18 month old daughter back in 2010 and there is a good chance you probably won't even see my reply but it's worth a try. I have a 19 month old baby girl that is 41 lbs and her doctor is starting to get concerned about her weight as well ensive: Just wondering how everything turned out with your daughter? Did she lose weight as she got older? Did they ever test her thyroid or lipids? I hope you see this and can reply and if so thanks in advance! :relaxed:


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## Tiya

Hello mummy 
I have the same issue and am worrie sick my 19 month baby weighs 44 lbs 
She is On a strict diet from the very beginning as I am a fitness freak and totally against junk food my baby has never had packet foods always home made no butter, cheese, sugar, biscuits and certainly not over fed yet she is over weight and as a result she has not started to walk yet just about manages to cruise 
I have had tests done and they all clear sugar, thyroid, metabolism etc 

I was going through the forums and found your case which is very similar to mine so thought to get some idea with the progress of your child and that should give me some idea 

Looking forward to your reply


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## Katieflorez

onelittlesleep said:


> I have a big, happy 18-month-old who is very healthy and developmentally normal. But lately, a lot of people in my life, people I even have trusted in the past for parenting advice, are starting to look at her and question if she's overweight! And if I should do 'something about it'.
> 
> My husband and I are both stunned by this reaction to our healthy, lovely girl. Like there is something wrong with her natural size! To be perfectly clear, she eats a lot of fruit, some veges, chicken, yogurt, cereals...mostly, she's still breastfeeding a lot and grazes on solids off and on during the day. This is how I raised my son, with self-guided weaning and a slow intro to solid foods. That went just fine! And it seems to be going just fine for my baby girl, other than the fact that other people seem hyper-aware of her weight "problem".
> 
> SIGH. I guess I just came on here for moral support. Please tell me that I'm not crazy! That my daughter IS fine and that these other people don't know what they're talking about.
> 
> To be honest, I don't even know how I'd slow her weight gain if I had to! She's just breastfeeding, primarily! All that chunk is from breastmilk!


Did they ever make you do anything different or did she just "thin out" my babygirl turned one in july and shes 35 ish pounds so im just curious


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## MommaOfABigBaby+4more

onelittlesleep said:


> I have a big, happy 18-month-old who is very healthy and developmentally normal. But lately, a lot of people in my life, people I even have trusted in the past for parenting advice, are starting to look at her and question if she's overweight! And if I should do 'something about it'.
> 
> My husband and I are both stunned by this reaction to our healthy, lovely girl. Like there is something wrong with her natural size! To be perfectly clear, she eats a lot of fruit, some veges, chicken, yogurt, cereals...mostly, she's still breastfeeding a lot and grazes on solids off and on during the day. This is how I raised my son, with self-guided weaning and a slow intro to solid foods. That went just fine! And it seems to be going just fine for my baby girl, other than the fact that other people seem hyper-aware of her weight "problem".
> 
> SIGH. I guess I just came on here for moral support. Please tell me that I'm not crazy! That my daughter IS fine and that these other people don't know what they're talking about.
> 
> To be honest, I don't even know how I'd slow her weight gain if I had to! She's just breastfeeding, primarily! All that chunk is from breastmilk!


Wow, just shocked at the lack of support in these comments. I also have a 44lb 21 month old baby boy, he has been at least 42lbs since 18 months old, he got his crazy growth spurt around 7 months old, no change in diet, skipped all the way to 18 month clothing, is now currently wearing 4-5T clothing and same size pullups even tho he isnt potty trained yet. I just want to say you arent alone. I've taken him in to be seen plenty of times, and everyone tells me he is a perfectly healthy baby boy, he is just larger in all aspects, id say he is as tall as an average 3-5 year old. There is nothing wrong with our kids. My second is a teeny guy, 9 months old now, and has the exact same diet. They are perfect the way they are. Hang in there.


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