# Making friends



## Vivalamojo (Oct 29, 2017)

I?m mom to an active 3 year old and adorable 3 month old. My husband is in his early 40s and I?m in my mid 30s. I?m fortunate enough to stay at home to raise my boys and will return to my career when they are in school down the road. A couple months ago we moved (about an hour away) to a new community and bought a house. We love it here.. safe, good schools, family oriented, lots of younger families with lots of activities but I?m finding it hard to make friends for me and the boys. Any suggestions? I?ve actually always struggled in this department and wish for a ?tribe? as this forum is called or even a single close friend would be fantastic! Here?s stuff I?ve tried so far.. introducing myself to neighbors, inviting those families over for play dates, attending mom group social mixers on meetup, story time at the library, toddler just finished a soccer class, attend toddler times at the community center, try chatting it up at the playgrounds.. it?s hard work! Especially with a newborn and new house to unpack etc. The neighbors have gotten together a few times and exchanged phone numbers which is nice but so far I get the feeling that they are pretty busy. I?m trying to be patient and give things time. Anyone have experience with this? Thanks for your time in reading and responding if you feel so inclined, Samantha


----------



## Nazsmum (Aug 5, 2006)

being a mom and making friends in like dating. I really don't know why. But it is true.

I will be your friend. :flowersforyou


----------



## mumto1 (Feb 17, 2016)

Yep. It can be hard, between finding someone you relate to, and kids your own children enjoy. It sure does make it easier when both align, but that doesn't always happen. Don't you have a local park? Going there consistently can help you feel a part of a community. Sometimes volunteering can be a good way to meet like minded people, you can learn a lot about people when you are working together. It's difficult too, if you are the only SAHM around. Where I used to live nannies were nearly 1/2 or 1/3 of the adults out in the community with kids in tow, and a lot of those ladies were Phillipino and hung out together, naturally. Some of the SAH parents were dads and it was honestly awkward to form friendships with them. I happened to find a friend at the library.


----------



## Sachewli (Sep 5, 2013)

I don't really have any great suggestions for you because I am in almost the same boat. My partner and I are so frustrated with this situation, not so much for ourselves, but for our 4yo who really longs for meaningful connection with similarly-aged peers. It is so hard to meet people that want to connect and re-connect (as in for playdates). Like the other commenter said, it is really like dating! 

I am in Upstate NY and am curious where you are and are finding this challenging. I have begun to wonder whether it's the subculture of our region or the overall culture of broader society, and if we should move for a better community. But your story of having just moved and finding this amongst so much good concerns me! Best to you!!


----------

