# Top o' the year to you, May (04) Mamas!



## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

link to old thread


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## Jacqueline (Jun 11, 2003)

Happy New Year, y'all!

The kids actually slept/are sleeping late today! Woo hoo!

We went to a partay last night at a friend's house. They have a kindergartener and then other couple friends came and brought their kids. G was the tag-alonger with the other kids, but he had fun. Although, there was a minor injury with about each child...kind of common when a bunch of 3-6 year olds gather, I guess. G fell down a couple stairs while trying to be under a giant Thomas the Train (sounds worse than it is. He's okay). This is the first time dh and I actually went "out" on NY Eve in forever. It was a little tough for A, though, as she is such an extrovert and wanted to engage with everyone but she was so tired. I had to wear her around their house in the sling so she'd sleep at all and no NIP for her; I had to nurse her in a quiet bedroom as she was totally distracted in the living room. Totally different than G.

It's cooooooold here today. It was 2 degrees (F) when we came home last night around 10:30. The main highway between here and Denver was closed for about 24 hours due to avalanche threat, so our grocery stores were pretty thin yesterday! I'm so not used to how cut off from things we can be out here in the winter!

Dh is making biscuits and eggs, so I best go.


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## Jacqueline (Jun 11, 2003)

oh, and danile, loved your birth story. Your doula should look into midwifery! Can't wait to see pics, too.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

*pokes head out from under rock*







YO DUDE, HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!









Okay, so before anyone chokes on their tea/coffee in utter shock, just know that I may not be very prolific in the thread, but I need my May Mamas in more regular supply! I have MISSED you all and have been weathering being a mama to my May babe alone for FAR too long!









Most of you know some of what's up, but let me do a quick rundown; I'm a nanny 3 days a week to a 5-month-old; Rowan comes with me two out of the three days, the other one he stays home with my friend M., the mama of the 2-year-old that I do a swap with; I also watch her son for pay once a week in addition to the regular swap.

Rowan is awesome; well, right now, in the midst of all the holiday madness he's been kind of, well, _INSANE_







but we're dealing. In general he is a joy, and I love that he is a KID, now, and we can have conversations and play games and stuff. I think he's starting to READ, too!







: Amazing. I also need to peruse this forum again to remind me that yes, all the crazy little things these kiddos do is NORMAL, the neuroses will pass, the fact that he seems to grow deaf when I try to talk to him in anything resembling a "gentle" voice and I resort to yelling







: is something that will pass...yeah. Some reminders that I am not a terrible mama would be nice!









DH and I are amazing, not much else to say about that.









And I of course am getting cut short by the child asking for a cookie at 11am!
Oh yeah, it's good to be back.

Here's to an amazing 2008 for everyone!


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

kk--get back here with more words than that!









jacquie--yay for a night out!

renae!!!!

















































happy almost!! hope you are showered with love and cool gifts!

cookies at a 11am are nothing. my girls get m&ms (3) with breakfast after they chew their fish oil caps.







:

hj slept from 7-3!! last night.

still way tired from the cumulative lack of sleep.

DH went into work today even though the office is closed.







:

off to see what the girls want to do today!


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

Allison informed me this morning, in all seriousness, that she would like a chocolate sundae for breakfast.


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

Mmmmmm... chocolate.

NYE festivities were unusually non existent last night. I didn't even stay up until midnight. I think I fell asleep around 10:30 or so - a first for me. I normally at least stay up. And it's a good thing I went to sleep, because Mia woke up around 1:30 and had to go potty (with Jett in tow ) and she ended up pooping a big ol poop and then after I got them all back in bed, she whispered to me, "Mommy, I pooped again. I had an accident." So it was up again, lights on, changing clothes, the whole bit. It must have been 2:30 before we all got back to sleep. If i had stayed up until midnight or later I would have been um, not as patient as I was. And this morning I feel jut fine. Refreshed even.

Yay for going out and having fun, though.









MF, good to "see" you and Happy Big Day tomorrow.









Kids are watching the Rose Parade. Oh wait, they are starting to fight. What else is new?

Happy 2008 EveryBuggy!


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Happy 2008 to you all!









NYE was spent at my SIL's family's house. We had a good time, and got home around 1030. Katie fell asleep in the car, and I fell asleep around 1130 or so. I had planned on at least staying up, but dh was watching football and I was bored, so I fell asleep.

Going to take the kids sledding today, so I'll check in later.


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

Happy New Year!!!







:







:







:

i stayed up til 1. thankfully ebin slept from then until 6:30! and then back down again until 9:20. that was amazing. it may be a 'family nap' day though









ebin's 2nd top toofer broke through. i had given him motrin last night so maybe that helped the good sleep

there were lots of fireworks here last night. oregonians LOVE their explosives. i'm still not used to it, coming from CA where they're prohibited in a lot of places. (well and everyone sets off illegal fireworks here....up in the sky bright lights types and lots of mortars.) amazingly enough the sky was clear of clouds for what seems like the first time in 2 months and we could see the fireworks.

yeah. the candy/cookie/sugar begging begins right after breakfast here. 'but i ate my breakfast!!!!'







but then i make it worse by buying things like TWO boxes of popscicles. the skinny cow fudge bars...omg. i ate my breakfast so i might just have to have one myself soon


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Happy 2008 everybuggy!

I was SO gonna be the first to make this thread. I fergot.
Baby all over me and this keyboard is making mommy really pissy.

I was well asleep last night after starting the night in party mode. Viet was really tired, so it took the wind right outta my sails, usually it's vice versa...
So I got a little tipsy on mezcal and then went to bed.

Yesterday though Sol and I had the best day, really fun, I took her with me on all my errands plus a surprise visit to the park. Then I had a meal with her at my fave restaurant, owned by a friend of mine preg with #2 who wanted a sling==trade==nice meal for sling. So Sol and I had "drinks", I had the salmon (luxury), dessert, coffee, and we had about a 2 hr meal if you can imagine. We had crayons and paper and scissors for her, and all in all a totally nice mama n sol time.

Then this morning I woke up to a gift under the tree for me!!! Viet had written a cute letter from "melchor" of the 3 kings, that he heard sancho claus didn't bring the mami of this family any presents, so here's one, plus a little giftie for the girls, and I got a french press! num num! Now my coffee rocks even harder. I really am happy with it.

My girls were just naked in the patio taking baths outdoors. Now they need towels, gotta run, but am so happy soooo happy renae you are back.


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Okay, today must be Z's day:

At 5:30 am, he and T climb into bed with us. Z had awakened T (I don't know how, he sleeps so soundly), and they're both there saying they're hungry, demanding "treats", etc. Dh exhorts them not to wake L. Oops, too late ("Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!"). Dh leaves bed with the 2 little ones (for Z to finish his dinner from last night, hmm, is that why he's hungry?), and T and I sleep another hour or so.

Coupla hours later, finally pry T out of our bed, try to shovel healthy filling breakfast down him so we're prepared to go to the New Year's potluck brunch we always go to (where there is often a serious imbalance in the goodies:sustaining food ratio). Ask Z to get dressed. Minutes later, find him upstairs, naked, doing "penis push-ups" (spread-eagled on the floor, lowers himself till his penis touches the floor).









Z's resolution for the new year, by the way, is to go on more hikes.









Oop. Gotta go.


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

I think that is the funniest thing I've heard in a long time.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Sorry- It's been crazy around here. We had planned New Years with friends thinking we would have a couple week old baby and be well rested. I didn't have the heart to cancel- so I've been completely overtaken by that. They came up with their three kids and it was INSANITY!!! But we're doing well... Jasmine is a little angel (though she seems to have her days and nights mixed up)







:







But who can resist such beautifulness even if it IS three in the morning?







I will try to post some pics soon... I've just been distracted with the visitors...

Much love to my MMF who I read- but don't always get to reply to!

Wish me luck... I start full time online courses next week!


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

omig&d, kk, that is frickin' fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh-neeeeeeeeee...







:

aloha, yet again, from kauai. my sis and her partner leave late, late tonight, none too soon, it seems, as they are not only driving me crazy, but my mom too. communication issues. arrrrgh.

just 'scribin', more when we get back to p-town saturday.

and just an fyi, kauai is experiencing one of its rainiest winters in a long, long time. beauitful, but rainy and a little colder than a tropical vacation.

aloha,
~claudia


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## fiddlefern (Nov 9, 2003)

Ducette- mama, you need to put your feet up! You DESERVE to put your feet up. You just had a baby! I really hope you get to recoup and curl up with your lil nursling.









HF- that's funny. L gets exactly 3 M&M's every morning for breakfast, too. For eating his chewable vitamin. Since his diet is attrocious (thanks, feeding team), the vitamin is really important. He also gets a babyspoonful of chocolate ice cream every morning, in which his reflux med is mixed. Yah, his life is rough.

Hi Renae!









Nightweaning. Hah, ha, ha.







:. W is almost 11 months old, and I have made it a policy basically since birth not to nurse him more often than every 2 or 3 hrs at night. If he gets up between then, he gets ME, with NO BOOB. So you'd think, since he has other sleep associations with me, that it would be easy to push the envelope to nursing every 4 hours. Heck, maybe a 5 hour stint. Sigh.







head. As jstar said, things get busy during the day, so I worry that he needs those night-time feedings. I've been _intending_ (but not following through) to work on fewer nursings, as I thought I was getting transferred to a new group home soon, where I couldn't take the babe, and so DH was going to be on night duty.

However, I just learned tonight that the higher ups are thinking about keeping me in my current position till I have enough work as a trainer that I don't need a direct care position.







:







:







. That would be so cool. In addition to the red cross stuff, which isn't that many hours, I may be teaching OIS (Oregon Intervention System- now a national program for dealing with violent behavior in clients- please don't laugh to hard after recent events), and perhaps also teaching Bloodborne pathogens. Wow, my old teaching job without all those math papers to correct. Sounds good to me.

Jacqu- I hear you on diff kids being so diff to take out in public!

Isn't it funny how New Years changes after you're a parent? Suddenly that good ol routine feels more important than gettin' down or gettin' toasted.

I don't think I've seen the new year in as a parent until this year. We had a GREAT time. We went over to the main house of our spiritual community, put the kids to bed in one of the bedrooms at 8pm, (there are like 10 bedrooms in this house or something), and then hung out and played board games and shared stories and played guitar and stuff till midnight. I heard about the time the pastor pulled his kids out of school for 4 months and headed the family down to Mexico. They were sick of the US, and gonna leave the country for good until their VW bus broke down and they couldn't afford to go on. tee hee. I love radicals. We're the most boring non-radical people in our church.

Blech. Full day tomorrow at work, kids in tow. Do I hafta?


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

First of all, penis push-ups?!?!








Wow, that is some funny funny stuff!
And secondly, KAUAI! I knew you were gonna be in Hawaii, Claudia but I somehow missed that you're in KAUAI! That's amazing! We will have to compare notes when you get back! Definitely a highlight of 2007 for me!









Glad to know the begging for treats isn't just because WE have a TON of treats in this house and have been a little lax with the treat-giving this holiday season.







: I KNOW there have been several accounts of "cookies for breakfast" this past month...now we're trying to get out of the whole holiday mode...but it's hard! I also don't really count the holidays as being "over" until AFTER my birthday! And that's...today!

That's right, me=OLD!







I'm 32 today. Growing older isn't really freaking me out. Maybe it's the fact that I still have acne, and drama, like a teenager.








Seriously, I actually feel good about the coming year, and I feel good about the year behind me (dude, I had the BEST year musically! I went to so many shows and got into so much music...and I started going clubbing again! Yeah, good times) and I kinda like that my birthday is so close to the beginning of a New Year.

Anyhow, more later I'm sure. I'm pretty tickled to be back myself!







Sesame Street just ended and Rowan turned off the TV, and went into the other room to play with the balloons DH left on his changing table this morning...for ME! Haha.

Oh yeah, I meant to add: No birthday plans today, just work.







It's all good. DH promised we could go to my favorite restaurant for brunch Saturday morning; this awesome place called Julian's, where I actually went for the first time for my 30th birthday! It's expensive, punk-hipster-rich-kids-whose-parents-sent-them-to-art-school-in-the-city







, but I love it. And it's totally kid-friendly. And so many vegan-vegetarian choices that I am always overwhelmed and not sure what to get!









Have a great day mamas. It's so awesome to be able to catch up on whate everyone is up to. I've missed you.


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

:







:







:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY RENAE!























It's so very good to see you!! May the coming year be even better than you anticipate







:

Got our first real snowfall here last night, so my main goal for the day is to get all three kids outfitted in their snow gear and go outside to play. Honestly, that sounds so totally daunting, I may have to get myself a second cup of coffee before I really contemplate that. And of course Ethan is still sleeping, after being up for a nice party between 2:30 and 5:00 this morning. Nightweaning is on the horizon, but probably not for a couple more months. We'll see how it goes.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Our babes need to coordinate their partying...HJ was rockin' it from 10p-1215am and back for more at 3am. Nightweaning is obviously a looooong way off for us, but yes, totally dreaming about the sleep I will get one day in the future. For now, 5 hours cobbled together will have to do.

Mister man lounging in the boppy and E entranced by super why! C at school...

For now I'll just dream of coffee. Pondering getting one of those pod type machine thingies. HJ doesn't nap during the day anyway so not like a little caffeine would make a difference!


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Hi friends!

I have both girls dripping off of me at the moment, nak too, every morning/day is like this. kk, please tell me again how you do it sans tv.

Amara just fell for the second t ime in two days from a dining room chair onto a tile floor. Should I take her to the chiro?

Renae, I am sooooo happy for you that you've had a good 2007, musically and otherwise. I am sending you great wonderful birthday wishes. Thanks for re-joining us, it wasn't the same without you. I love knowing my posts would sometimes make you laugh.

can't. handle. this. mamaneedmamaneedmamaneedmama much longer.


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Happy Birthday Renae!!


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Hope you get a break, soon, Els! Its hard to be so touched out with no end in sight.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

thanks Sherri for the empathy. After reading Heather's post again I had a thought:

icoffeepod!

What would it be like?

what bells n whistles?


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Happy Birthday Renae! Welcome back! We've missed you, girlfriend.

I meant to respond to the treats thing in my last post. Lily has had so much sugar in the past 3 weeks. I can't even blame it in my parents - I got her all the chocolate for her stocking.







: Oh well, it's back to sanity when we get home.

Ducette, mama, you're amazing. Be sure to take care of yourself too, hon.

Fiddle - the new teaching gigs and job sitch sound great. I'm thinking good thoughts for you.

Elsanne - I would take her to the chiro, if it were me. Icoffeepod: you could program it to wake you up with a certain song. You could download special recipes for frothy mocha drinks from [email protected]

Today I'm getting a massage (gift certificate from my parents). Soooo looking forward to it. We leave here tomorrow and home Friday. It's been good but I'm ready to head back.

S.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

NAK and trying to verbally referee between two wwf pro wrestling toddlers...









Just wanted to quickly say

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RENAE!
Hope you have some fun before you go Claudia!
Els- hope you get a delicious break soon!
Heath- Jas lays propped in the boppy while swaddled when we watch our nightly movie/play cards together after the boys go to bed. That just made me picture the similar things parents sometimes need to do to breathe...









Gotta run... they're fighting with their little playset chairs...







:


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Els, I just had to come commisserate with you for a second (while Rowan has allowed me to go!







) about the mamaneedmamaneedmamaMAMAMAMAMAMAMA!!!!








Yeah, and I only have one. Sometimes it feels like a lot more. Haha.

I hope you get some time to yourself soon, dear Mama!









And getting three kids outfitted for snow? Now *I* need a second cup of coffee!







Good luck!

Okay, MAMAMAMAMAMAMA is back on. Talk to you later.

It's GOOD to be back.


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

Hmm, did I say earlier that I felt daunted by the prospect of gearing up three kids and going outside? I think next time I'll give myself license to listen to that little voice







: The problem with trying to get three kids ready is that any time *one* of them cooperates, the other two are off creating chaos somewhere else. I couldn't find Ethan's snowpants at all







but we persevered and made it outside, where all were happy for at least the first 30 seconds. Ethan thought it was the best thing ever, but kept running for the street. He's so dang cute, though! Allison started out thrilled, but I think she got tired quickly and had snow in her boots and mittens, so she didn't last long.

So in less than an hour we were all exhausted and ready for some hot cocoa. And though it was a lot of work, it was a lot of fun and even though I say I won't undertake that again without reinforcements, I'll probably be moved by the magic of it all again.

Now I need a nap.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

juice---you have me awwing out loud here. Visions of what our winter will look like next year! Is it me, our are your kiddos tall? They looks so much older than their actual ages!

Elsanne--I would take her to the chiro. E is a daredevil+clumsy...not a good combo and could probably stand to get adjusted every week at the rate she falls/tumbles.

FF--yay for saner job prospects! Teaching rocks!

Claudia-- hope the rain, rain goes away and comes again like Sunday!

Renae--*mwah* just makes me happy to see your purple!

Sarah--I think we need some pics oy! when you get back!

my iCoffeePod would most definitely download starbucks recipes and be remotely operable from upstairs...hmmm....would probably also grind/blend beans to suit my whim...playing soothing wake up music would be a bonus.

Girlies are enjoying playing together quietly! nicely! sharingly! in the attic playroom. Our house may be a little fixer upper, but I totally love that we have an attic playspace and sewing area.

I fear that HJ has much of C's same temperment wrt sleep. Desperately trying to find a sling/wrap/carrier solution to keep him content. gah.

onward!


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

juice-

those pics are heavenly! you seem to have a talent for catching the magic of the moment, myself- not so much.


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Those pictures rock, Juice! I especially liked the pouty Allison picture! And the last one of Ethan was magical for sure! Remind me again how old Caitlyn is? Five? Six?


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Juice--your post was inspired. I loved the pics and the one of Allison's misery made me guffaw aloud. Don't tell her I laughed at her misery.

Heath--"sharingly" made me smile. I can relate.

ff--yaaaay at the job prospect! At being recognized by the higher-ups! Your NYE sounds really lovely.

icoffeepod: would also line up the day's tasks, communicating to coffee maker and to computer to a) make coffee, and b) get my email up on screen.
Hell, then it would make breakfast.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Chiro dilemma #2: After being convinced that chiro for kids = good, I broached the subject to the chiro, who said that basically for them to treat anyone, they need xrays.
a) radiation on my baby's bodies!
b) $$$$$$!
c) $$!
d) $!

*sigh* complicated!

would you do it? ($ notwithstanding?)


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Els--xrays?? standard? ick! Our chiro has no such 'clause', but only inquired about them when C had her nasty fall and seizure last summer. That said, both girls have had xrays and I know the amount of them is miniscule, but then again the $$ factor. I guess there are different schools of chiro, but ours seems well able to use her blessed hands to ascertain what she needs to know. hmmm...

I'm really just babbling and procrastinating the laundry folding. Which needs to be done before the kiddos wake up lest it get unlaundered all over the living room. crud...squeaking baby. so much for that!


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Hmmm. I've never had to have xrays for chiro work. Juice??

P.S. Your pics were amazing! What cuties.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

An x-ray to do chiro work on a child? I haven't heard of that....









Could be wrong...

So mamas of three... did your mmf baby adjust well to a new sibling and then have a hard time with behavior after another sibling was added as well?

Be back to explain ? later... babe is crying.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

C was fine after both kiddos, but that's just her quirkiness working in our favor for a change! She did get out of sorts with other people caring for her (read: messing with her schedule) in the early days. That still throws her off, baby or no.


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

Thanks for all the props on the pics! It's very, very rare that I actually get them from the camera to the computer, and then to get them uploaded and posted on the very same day?? Practically unheard of. And Danile - that was an unusually good group of pics. I have a whole folder of attempts to get a good pic of the kids for a holiday card, it's titled "16 reasons people hire professional photographers". No holiday card was made this year.

And yes, my kids are tall. Caitlyn will be six in 10 days *eek!* and she comes up halfway between my elbow and my shoulder, and I'm 5'10. (Nope, I don't have a tape measure nearby







)

Elsanne, I think X-rays for a kid that age is NUTS. I don't even do them on big people. I think chiropractic care for kids is fantastic, obviously, but I've never even HEARD of requiring X-rays for them. $$ aside, it just isn't necessary.

danile, I can't help as my maybaby is my #2, so she's only had to adjust once. I did find that my first had a hard time with the arrival of #3.

Well, my adventures in the snow paid off in terms of the girlies taking themselves upstairs and reading quietly to each other for an hour, and Ethan being down for over 2.5 hours right now. Wahoo!


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

Happy Birthday Renae!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Julian's sounds yummy







: i hope you have a faboo day even though you have to work. and a great year!

juice - AWESOME photo-story. oh the fun! we haven't had snow and i was telling doug we need to go up to mt. hood and snowshoe. he thinks ebin will die and getting all the gear and blah blah is too much effort for what may end up being 20 mins of fun. but i want the experience...however brief







so we'll see if i talk him into that one

fiddle - that's great about the work possibilities!

i haven't even been feigning to make decaf lately.







i like the icoffepod idea









i'm in the middle of tearing out allllllll our clothes in our bedroom and organizing them. it is like moving in again. but ebin just went down for a nap so i'm taking a break. i realllllly want to put the christmas stuff away too. i'm ready for the 'fresh new year' look not the 'christmas is over but dusty' look.

we had ebin's wbv this morning (7mo). i was guessing 25 lbs but he was 24 lbs 11 oz. can't remember how tall. 30.5"? he flattened a bit on his curves. she said that he could (theoretically) sleep through the night now if i wanted to nightwean and breastfeed him a lot more during the day. that sounds tempting....but not likely yet. but i may contemplate it after our upcoming vacations. i feel like kind of a harda$$ but he was such a good sleeper before i do know he's capable. and he's mr. busy during the day now so i think a lot of it is convenience for him. this is likely the talk of a sleep deprived lady. i should at LEAST go to 3-4 hr blocks instead of nursing him when he wakes after only an hour or so. i've created a milk monstah!

i need a snack







:


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

I GOT MY SOCKS!!!!

tHEY ARE purple, beautiful, soft as anything. I love them to bits.

Only a month, Jstar!!! A month it took them to get here!

YAAAAY and what a great thing at kind of a crappy juncture in the day.

RE: chiro/xrays. The woman I saw today is a student of the main chiro I see, so I'm going to ask him personally about Amara's care. She said it's important, just in case some vertebras are not fused or something like that, which she wouldn't know by feeling.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

els--still not sure about that explanation. HJ's been getting adjusted since a week and E from about 8 weeks on.... fu$ed schmu$ed ....just my two cents...

And all this chiro talk made E want to go. oy! no really oy! not that oy! She fell off her bed yesterday and seemed fine, but was complaining that her back was 'ouching' when she got up from nap. So off we went!

I think I *finally* have the moby thing figured out to HJ's liking thanks to a kind mdc'er. phew! pics on the blog in a bit...

btw...you all need to give sherri some love on her bloggity blog and get on her protected list. she promises semi-regular porch pics there if you sign up for xanga and message her. okay, not really, but I







reading her blog and you should too!


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 
YAAAAY and what a great thing at kind of a crappy juncture in the day.

And yet again, the socks pull through as much more than socks! BEST exchange idea EVER. (Who thoughta that? I think elsanne but I can't remember for sure.) So glad you got them and so glad they are perfect. (Yes, I realize I didn't send them. But I'm just that happy for you!)

HF - that was two $, not two cents







:

And I'm sorry, but I still think X-rays on a little one are not necessary. While spina bifida is comparatively common (but not what I'd call "common"),it's almost never diagnosed unless it's visible from the outside, and it rarely causes problems. A good chiro shouldn't be using so much force that it's an issue - certainly less than the fall that produced the concern in the first place, yes?


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *heatherfeather* 
btw...you all need to give sherri some love on her bloggity blog and get on her protected list. she promises semi-regular porch pics there if you sign up for xanga and message her. okay, not really, but I







reading her blog and you should too!

OH. MY. GOODNESS. I am laughing out loud here, Heather! You just totally made my day! I'm not sure reading my musings and moanings is so enjoyable, but I'm touched that you read. FTR, Heather is my one and only blog reader, so come one come all!


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Okay, then, that settles it. Survey Says, No Xrays on Amara. Let's see what mr. doc says.

Heather thanks SO MUCH for the link, Sherri, we got your number babe. You are the opposite of me in the attention-calling department. May I say how beautiful you are holding your babies! I looove how K is cradling your face. Great photos and








about the rudeness.


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Awww, shucks, els. I just came back to ask if you could see my blog. I saw your "footprint" and wanted to make sure you could see. I double checked to make sure you are on my protected list. You are too sweet! I love my May Mamas! May Mamas Forever I say!!!


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Hear hear! MMF!









I wish I had time to blog. Someday, maybe. There's an awesome blog by a new midwife who started it when she was a CNM student. How she found the time, I'll never know...oh right, nevermind, she doesn't have a kid. Hah. But anyway, it's a really good blog if anyone's interested: http://www.bellytales.com

Sarah


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

I added tropicana to my protected list-is that you Sarah? If it's not let me know, I'm a bit of a novice with the site and might need to confer with the expert heather.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

mcsb... I added you to my list, you just have to be logged in to your xanga to see when you visit.

HJ finally settled this evening so hopefully the oversupply is calming down after the last growth spurt. He has a check-up in the morning. Curious how long he is because he seems to grow longer by the day. He almost fits into his Canucks soft leather shoes (dh's fave hockey team or one of them....)

C is so thrilled with the new year, new calendars, new months, etc. She almost can't wait for E's birthday next month and keeps telling her that she's going to get her a big surprise.







This sister/sibling thing is dang cute.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

nah, Sherri, that's our Juice! As in OJ! Don't worry, it took me a few minutes to figure that out. I'm a little slow at this hour!


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Sarah'sMama* 
I added tropicana to my protected list-is that you Sarah? If it's not let me know, I'm a bit of a novice with the site and might need to confer with the expert heather.

Me, me! Tropicana is me. (get it?) Sorry, thought I signed it Juice or something good like that. Lots going on here tonight.

ETA: By "lots going on here" I mean " trying to post with toddler in Downward-facing-dog pose on couch using free leg to kick keyboard."


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

I shoulda known that! I kept thinking that Sarah was in Florida, so maybe that was her....Ok, juice, you're added! Yay! I'm getting readership!!! Sarah do you have a xanga acct?


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Got it - got in to both you and Heather's. Yay! Thanks.

I am tired. And not looking forward to a 5+-hour car trip tomorrow to the airport (great airport to fly into for party at relatives...not so great to leave from 5 hours away from parents' house). TG we are staying in a hotel tomorrow and actually flying out on Friday, so it's not long car trip + 9-hour plane trip in one day.







:

Anybody else's maybaby into dinosaurs in a big way? Lily is all about them. I will have to post a pic of her in her new TRex costume. Tonight my mom was reading to her and Lily was correcting her pronounciation of the dino names.









S.


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

YAY SOCKS!!!!!!!!!!

i am SO glad! i was feeling so bad i had not rallied myself to get out and get some new ones in the mail. in hindsight i mailed a few other things at the same time and they ask you 'priority or first class?' and all that. and with yours they just printed a stamp and it was done. and so i must have paid SLOW BOAT price!!! but i am glad they made it









you guys are going to force me to sign up for xanga







but it is almost bedtime for boys around here. i started a blog recently but it is just for crafty stuff and it is so paltry right now i'm too embarassed to share









happy travels home, sarah. the trip home from my parents' cabin was kinda like that. it is a 5 hour drive from any airport. on the way home last summer we did drive + flight and it took allllllll day. luckily it isn't an east to west flight though.

i think lily's dinosaur love is so cute









time for bedtime snack!


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Yes, we're fully into dinos here too. Correcting pronunciation, WOW.

Seriously big central theme in Sol's play is people/animals being STUCK, NO PUEDE SALIR. Anything will eventually get "stuck" no matter what the play scenario. And she LOVES it if I suggest the "stuckness".

Another theme: Monsters.

Another thought about Sol: we've come to realize that every day, my beloved Laura brings her a treat of some kind. Since we as first time parents were REALLY strict that her babysitters not give her sweets (Amara is loving the relaxed, second-kid aspect of this) I'm not sure how it started, but I have to admit: I think it's cute, sweet, and loving.

When I was a kid, I wasn't allowed any sweets, to the point that it became a mild obsession for me which I would hide from my mom. She wasn't ridiculous about it, we did have things on occasions, but I was a budding eating disorder regardless. So much so that in fantasy play with my friend, we created a character called Fat Mom. She was the one who gave you all kinds of goodies, treats, said yes to your desires and basically spoiled you rotten. Everything my jazzercising mother was not, at the time, amplified by my being 11 years old.

Today Sol picked up a bushy cattail on her outing with Daddy, and when she brought it home she started sweeping, and pronounced to me that She was Laura, and I was Solie. "Solie? I got somfin for youuuu! *rummages in bag* Here. It's a lollipop." was the first thing she said. Then she swept with great dedication, all the christmas garland she had cut from the tree with scissors, for about a half hour, occasionally calling out to me to give me something from her bag--a pink cat, yo tengo muchos, several more pink cats...


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 
Today Sol picked up a bushy cattail on her outing with Daddy, and when she brought it home she started sweeping, and pronounced to me that She was Laura, and I was Solie. "Solie? I got somfin for youuuu! *rummages in bag* Here. It's a lollipop." was the first thing she said. Then she swept with great dedication, all the christmas garland she had cut from the tree with scissors, for about a half hour, occasionally calling out to me to give me something from her bag--a pink cat, yo tengo muchos, several more pink cats...











Sending peaceful vibes for safe smooth travels ahead sarah!

I'm so feeling the MMF love! I went from one friend on my blog to about five in a matter of minutes!!!









KK, you've been a bit quiet-how's it going??


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 
Today Sol picked up a bushy cattail on her outing with Daddy, and when she brought it home she started sweeping, and pronounced to me that She was Laura, and I was Solie. "Solie? I got somfin for youuuu! *rummages in bag* Here. It's a lollipop." was the first thing she said. Then she swept with great dedication, all the christmas garland she had cut from the tree with scissors, for about a half hour, occasionally calling out to me to give me something from her bag--a pink cat, yo tengo muchos, several more pink cats...











Sending peaceful vibes for safe smooth travels ahead sarah!

I'm so feeling the MMF love! I went from one friend on my blog to about five in a matter of minutes!!!









KK, you've been a bit quiet-how's it going??


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 
Today Sol picked up a bushy cattail on her outing with Daddy, and when she brought it home she started sweeping, and pronounced to me that She was Laura, and I was Solie. "Solie? I got somfin for youuuu! *rummages in bag* Here. It's a lollipop." was the first thing she said. Then she swept with great dedication, all the christmas garland she had cut from the tree with scissors, for about a half hour, occasionally calling out to me to give me something from her bag--a pink cat, yo tengo muchos, several more pink cats...











Sending peaceful vibes for safe smooth travels ahead sarah!

I'm so feeling the MMF love! I went from one friend on my blog to about five in a matter of minutes!!!









KK, you've been a bit quiet-how's it going??


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

there's somethin kooky going on around here. it shows elsanne as the last poster. but sherri was. hmm

i think i'm developing mastitis







those top teeth gnawed up my nipple and now it is painful down the whole side of my boob. dangit.


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Sorry 'bout the triple post earlier, mamas. MDC was all wonky on me this morning. Those posts didn't show up until much after I initially posted them.








: This is our weather right now! Whenever it gets cold my stoooopid garage door opener decides to go on the fritz, and I had to manually open and shut it this morning before/after taking Katie to skool.







:

Hope you can nip the mastitis in the bud. (really bad pun intended


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

Popping in to say how much I can't stand this smilie ---->







What is up with that??? Who claps at what someone says online???

Okay, sorry, had to get that out.

Away with you, Mastitis!!!!

Hosting playgroup at my house today and I better get moving. This place is a sty and I really need to pick up all the carp that's all over the floor.


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

it is feeling a lot better today thankfully

i had grand plans of taking both kids to the gym this morning to the playroom. remember the last time i posted about the gym sooooooo long ago? yep - that's the last time i went







i have the babysitter coming today though since i didn't get any work done earlier in the week. so maybe i'll still fit it in today. i have a bunch of end of year cleanup carp to do for doug's company though. boooring

ebin only woke 2 times last night. woo woo. he didn't go to sleep until 11 (!) but at least then he zonked out.

where is everybuggy?? it's quiet around here. must be the







:







:







:

that smilie bugs me too. but i just love this one







:


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

I love that smilie...







:

I use it mostly in News and Current Events... or in breastfeeding, and the case against circumcision. So.. basically- when there's a debatable topic. But some people have said things that just took the words right out of my mouth and got the point across so well- I HAD to use it.

Go away Mastitis!!!







:







:







:







:


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Here! Heading out to the GI for HJ in a bit. I think I figured out part of the problem. The boy had 5!! HUGE diapers in a row today. I wouldn't want to eat if I was that backed up either. Strange though because he has been going every day, but kaboom! So there goes his small weight gain. Who knows. DH is picking up a rental babyweigh scale for a month so I can do weekly checks at home and not worry.

C is soooo excited to be back in school. She came positively unglued w/ the lack of routine around the holiday.

Okay...must pack diaper bag.

jstar--woo! indeed for only 2 wakies. Hope work gets done. Maybe you need to run out for a coffee? (okay, I'm not helping, am i?)

meg--I don't like that smilie either or lots of them actually!

danile...that one is funny!! How is your sweetie pie doing with the jaundice?

okay...really gotta go and do the snacks/coats/shoes thing. blah.


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

I was feeling under the weather, and then... I guess the kids got it. T is in bed with a fever. L is clingy/needy. That's all.







I know you're all insanely jealous of the glamourousness of my life right now.







Keep your fingers crossed on no barfies from the kids. It's mostly the other end (plus lots of intestinal crampiness)... T also seems to have a bit of a rash on his chest and back. We went swimming yesterday, though, and the pool was mostly bleach with a little water mixed in for good measure







:. I can't tell if it's his eczema acting up or what.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

is it me or is mdc eating posts??







:







:


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

.... and now dh is sick. He, T, and L are all in bed together (it would be cute if they weren't so miserable). I have to wear Z out and put him to bed. He's singing VERY LOUDLY and doing puzzles.

A lot of the new smilies are weird. Like







:...







Tjere should be an anti-mastitis smiley. Maybe a circle/slash/boob...







:


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Yeah, I wasn't getting updates there for a spell, fell off the mdc radar...dunno. The clapping smilie is for use when you walk into a thread, and nobody is paying any attention to you, why then you just Clap and say "Hup Hup! People! Listen up!". It's what I do, and it gets me many friends.










kk, the glamorousness of your life actually makes me feel bettah because I'm always sure you (and everyone else I know) have, overall, a much better life than me, glamorous or no. Which is ridiculous, I know, but actually hearing you kvetch makes me go Ah! I am NOT a total loser! This mothering bit is hard for her, too!

Jstar does it seem to be any better now? Hot baths, loooots of nursing, massage. I'll never forget when mastitis took me in the night like no one else has, it was unforgettable.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Elsanne-- you are not allowed to make me LOL at 4am when I've just rocked the babe into a semi-reliable slumber!









post #61 has mysterious;y reappeared???









happy weekend! I need to clean and craft. C has a bday party on Sunday. Can't believe her little friends are turning 4!!! Our babes will be 4!!! Where does time go?? Makes me want to go dig up that pic from when I first met Sherri and girls and Sarah was the age that our kiddos are now and K and C were 1.

That's enough 4am nostalgia for ya! Just got a sleep laugh from HJ so maybe it's safe to try and lay him down....


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Awwww 4 am wakies....long since a part of my past....









Today we celebrate Three Kings' Day, which is Santa part 2 in Sol's mind. Bunch more prezzies under the tree (Viet did all this, including earning $, shopping, wrapping) and it's fun. I'm camped out under a throw blanket w/laptop and coffee because BRRRRR it's cold.







: Any little dip in the thermometer is noticed when one doesn't have any heater! It was 43, indoors, a few days ago.

Heather I read somewhere recently that those eyes like your children have, are *aristocratic* eyes, one on either side of head vis a vis Jackie O... so now we know what sets the Feathers apart. They are, simply, born for greatness.

I did see post #61 last night, the 5 diapers, it was a memorable one. Even aristocrats have to carp, y'know.







:


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

So now, officially, no one in MMF is pregnant?

p.s. I have an appt coming up for IUD insertion! Yeeeaaah needed to do it long ago! So I can assure all I am among the non-preg mmf-ers.


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Egad, everyone cross your legs.














: (I'll admit part of me wants the baby, but without the pregnancy... and possibly even without the diapers, nursing, helplessness...







: just want a random 4th *child* every now and then.)

Dh seems to have the worst case of whatever it is (he got up and barfed in the middle of the night). [Part of me feels terrible for him, since I had way too much experience with the barfing with my pregnancies, but also, part of me feels like, "Well, barfing *once* in the last 20 years or so isn't that bad."







:] L is all backed up, and I'm a little fed up with just being walking oral rehydration fluid.

I finally have the kids working on thank you notes (boy,








: indeed). Total assembly-line/sweat shop: Z is stamping out "thank you", T is writing his notes, L is a scribble (and I have to write), then they get to add stickers (stickers are the carrot). We also should dismantle the tree, pack away the ornaments today. Or sometime.

Does anyone else enter the Dream House sweepstakes? I figure if I win, I can sell it and keep working on making our current house our dream house







.


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## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

KK - no, you do not have the right to do the







: for thank you notes! Alison and I made the decision that writing a generic thank you note in our Christmas cards was totally OKAY when we started writing our Christmas cards _yesterday_. We might make it an annual tradition to wait until we have recieved all gifts to write our cards and thus kill two birds, one stone, etc. Sad, really.

More later...I am doing all sorts of mental tricks and rewards to keep myself on task at work. I get to post again after another work milestone is reached.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

How did I know that Elsanne would find a much better use for that smiley than me?









Jaundice is doing okay... we had bellybutton/cord drama though... my midwife's assistant forgot the nail file to take the clamp off so she's had the clamp still attached as the cord is drying out... Well... it was hanging by a thread and so ready to come off but looking REALLY icky and starting bleeding. I started crying and freaking out... called the doctor and they tell me it's normal... I just need to get it to dry out. So we've been using the hairdryer (per midwife's suggestion) and the clamp fell off... but still spotting from the little stumpy bit that's left. Nothing like that to freak a new mom out. I am a hormonal spaz about my newborn for a while anyways. I panick about EVERYTHING that pertains to them. I lecture TJ on how to change her, be careful holding her, etc.. and this is our THIRD.







Anyhow... jaundice and bellybuttons are doing okay... Dom seems to be totally in love with Jas, but he's angry at me all the time... *sigh*

Crossing my legs indeed.


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

i'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!

after my sis and her partner left, i was FINALLY feeling like i was on vacation. my mom said she felt the same. too many different expectations of this trip, apparently. my sis is definitely of the po' mentality, like she's never gonna get back to hawaii ever again in her life until maybe she's like, old, and schtuff, so she's gotta cram stuff in while she's there. i had more fun in the 3 days we had after she left than i did the whole first 1.5 weeks.

anyway, started catching up, but realized i should just post that i'm back and then catch up as i can. may be now, may be later.

love to all,
claudia


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

MORNING!

whoops caps lock was on but i'll just go ahead and leave it. in case anyone wasn't awake yet









it was a nice sleepy-in morning today.

don't even







: about the thank you cards. i'm planning to do ours today (with similar stamping and decorating tactics courtesy of isaac). AND take down the near spontaneous-combustible tree too.

last night was wakey so i'm drinking my BIG cup of coffee.

i'm about to look online for an office to rent. doug and E are being poops about me using theirs. fine ok. i finally got a "real" check in the mail for work. can i just say





















?????? YAY. i think they'll miss me but they claim not. ha

also on my agenda: buying snow pants and rain boots or snow boots for isaac. he hasn't wanted to wear his rain boots at ALL at school and duh..they're too small! why did it take me too long to figure that out?

little HJ and ebin can compete for giant poops







ebin's solids intake is messing with him. he's finally into "consuming"

i'm really glad viet took on the magic of 3 kings day -- nice for you els









i hope the sickies get better at the KK house.

there's a giant blizzard in the sierras. we're going down there in a week and a half and i am SO GLAD said blizzard is not happening during our trip. i hope all our bay area mamas didn't get blown away yesterday!! we know lisa is accounted for







my sister said the blowing dust in bakersfield was terrible.


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

welcome home claudia







that's a drag about your sister - i'm glad you got a FEW days of relaxation. i'm having sister drama with our trip to the cabin in a couple weeks. she is very 'center of the universe' about what freakin bed she gets to sleep in at the cabin. i don't really give a carp and am giving up the NICE room and probably taking the bottom bunk below isaac. i was thinking i would take the bunk so my GRANDMA could get the nice room....but well there's that center of the universe complex to deal with







ahhhh family vacations


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Welcome back, TC!!! That's exactly why I don't invite mine for our summer vacation. Visits are good, but I think our personalities/needs are just too opposite.

Sherri! Mark your calendar July19-26 for Maine. The owner just called to see if we would switch weeks this year. Open invite! Better yet, you need to corral your family to get a place this year for the whole week! You know you miss the beach!

jess--good luck w/ the office search! yay for real check!

danile--I'm the sameway in the early days. Glad miss jas is doing okay. Hope Dom mellows towards you before long. How is Isaac w/ the whole new baby thing?

kk--I'm the same way when DH gets sick because he hardly ever does. Ditto his current foot dragging on making an appt about the big V. No sympathy from me on that one!


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

whew, all caught up. everyone except marek and me are sleeping right now: bill, my mom and dad and stefan. marek was catching up on his pbs shows on the tivo while i was catching up here.







:







:

*juice:* awesome pics!

*sherri:* sent you email ox for bloggity access.









*mcsb, fiddle & jstar:* since you all three have b-days in the end of feb/mar timeframe, i suggest an evening of only mamas going out for something slightly fancy. perhaps while mcsb is on her spring break? let's plan now so she gets it on her calendar...

*kk:* carp on the carp sickies.







:

*meg:* aloooooooooooooooooooooooooha! i've missed you 'round these parts.

*renae:* and another aloooooooooooooooooooooooooha to you! been missing you, too, and glad you are glad to be back. mmf, indeed. and yes, kauai. poipu area, just like where you sent your postcard from.

icoffeepod: sounds brilliant. definitely preprogrammed with frothy $tarbuck$ drinks (hey, that's funny that the middle of that word is "tarbuck"... hee hee), including the fancy seasonal ones like the pumpkin spice and the gingerbread spice. although one of my new faves is the chai with a shot of vanilla and some added whip. mmm... also would need to be a "smart" music system, where it would have a thumbs up/thumbs down system like tivo and make suggestions of new music based on your likes/dislikes. i'm so boring with the new music because i never get to listen to the radio anymore because the kiddos only like their familiar music. my new music discoveries recently have been courtesy of so you think you can dance on the tv...







: and









hey, the sun is coming out here! cool! well, it's coming out for a few minutes, anyway... oh, oregon, how i love thy greenery!

*mwah* and love to all the mmf...

aloha...

and haouli hakeniki hou! (that's happy new year in hawaiian.)

~claudia


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## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *TurboClaudia* 
also would need to be a "smart" music system, where it would have a thumbs up/thumbs down system like tivo and make suggestions of new music based on your likes/dislikes. i'm so boring with the new music because i never get to listen to the radio anymore because the kiddos only like their familiar music. my new music discoveries recently have been courtesy of so you think you can dance on the tv...







: and









Cheating on the work goal thing to say to claudia, Pandora! If you weren't already clued into this you will totally love it.


----------



## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

What's been up with MDC lately? It ate my post yesterday. Seems better so far today...

KK, hoping this is just a 24 hour thang for all of your sakes. My two girls had a stomach bug around Christmas, but luckily it was only a 24 hour thing. It was the worst for 6-8 hours, then gradually got better.

Heather! Must check with dh, he *just* put in for time off in July, so I need to find out when! Because we were thinking of doing the beach thang in Maine, so let me find out from him...would be awesome if we could meet up again like the good ol' days! And I could meet HJ! Need to stop getting too excited before I find out his week off....








Viet! Enjoy, els!

Welcome back, TC, you were missed! And Sarah should be checking in with us soon, I hope!

Lisa, glad to see you! Keep on trucking at work, mama!

jstar-good luck finding office space!

Took down our Christmas decs today, and deep cleaned and boy does it look good! Nice to get back to normal. And as I sit here typing I have a box of Thank You cards for the girls to write in, too! I've been procrastinating, but you've inspired me to pull out their stamps, too! Then we're off to go bowling this afternoon, Sarah's been asking for awhile, so we're going to go today.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

kk- hoping it is short lived also. Dom had a stomach flu a couple days ago and was puking all over everything. I was thankful that it was only at times tj was home..







:

how isaac is dealing... sometimes he is very loving and wants to give kisses, hugs, etc. Other times he ignores the fact that anything has changed. And yet again on other days he throws tantrums, screams and acts like a definite dethroned middle child... it all depends on the moment. Dom has also started picking on Isaac until Isaac literally clobbers him. Sometimes I feel like I am in a zoo....









Welcome back TC! Glad u got to enjoy at least PART of your vacay.

I say thankyou verbally for x-mas stuff. I suck at card sending this last year being in school. I will be sending out thank yous for baby stuff because I feel obligated...


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Pandora wouldn't let me in since I's in Mexico. Sheesh.

tc, i am bummed that your sis so dampened some of your vacation. There is a book I'm dying to read, called "I only say this because I love you" by Deborah Tannen (I LOVED her other book, "You just don't understand"), she is all about how the way we talk and the things we say affect our relationships--"I only say this" is about family relationships, and the other about romantic relationships. If you get a chance, might be a good read.
Doesn't "haouli" mean white person, ala ******? I once dated a hawaiian.
And a belgian. and a brazilian. a colombian. several mexicans, an ecuadorean, and several white americans.


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## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 
I once dated a hawaiian.
And a belgian. and a brazilian. a colombian. several mexicans, an ecuadorean, and several white americans.

This struck me as a good poll of sorts - who have you dated?

Me: Several american males (and the occational female) in high school, a scottish man (to whom I lost my virginity), a texan woman, several other normal american women, and a born-in-the-US-to-British-parents woman. Not nearly as interesting as Els, of course, but alas...


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Oh, your response, Danile, reminds me that I never answered about how my May Baby responded to the birth of a sib... like Juice, my May Baby is the middle child... he was not quite 2 when L was born. He was pretty okay with it... he is still needy sometimes, and I really try to give him extra attention. (Everyone likes to feel that they are the baby every now and again, no? Like dh...) T was 3 when Z was born, and while he never took anything out on Z, he definitely needed his routine to be the highest priority or he'd get totally out of whack. Dunno if that's helpful.

I was thinking that a haouli was a white person, too...

If I can just park a child on dh's motionless carcass, I can do some decluttering... (I'm sure my lack of sympathy is going to get me...) I'm not sure what to do with the unused condoms from pre-IUD... I'd like to Freecycle them, but I feel a little







...


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 
tc, i am bummed that your sis so dampened some of your vacation. There is a book I'm dying to read, called "I only say this because I love you" by Deborah Tannen (I LOVED her other book, "You just don't understand"), she is all about how the way we talk and the things we say affect our relationships--"I only say this" is about family relationships, and the other about romantic relationships. If you get a chance, might be a good read.

now requested from library. thanks, els. i think i have perused that book (the just don't understand one) before. requested both.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 
Doesn't "haouli" mean white person, ala ******? I once dated a hawaiian.
And a belgian. and a brazilian. a colombian. several mexicans, an ecuadorean, and several white americans.

_"haole"_ means "white person." _"haouli"_ means "happy."

Quote:


Originally Posted by *A&L+1* 
This struck me as a good poll of sorts - who have you dated?

Me: Several american males (and the occational female) in high school, a scottish man (to whom I lost my virginity), a texan woman, several other normal american women, and a born-in-the-US-to-British-parents woman. Not nearly as interesting as Els, of course, but alas...

dated/been intimate with: interesting... serial, long-term dated 3 italian-american men, one right after the other, 2 of which (the first and last) were extremely arrogant, which for some reason i find very attractive. various rebound dated/intimacy experiences with a few middle-class white boys of the not-fraternity type, a conservative jew, a very girly black guy (of the very light skinned variety -- not intended to be racist, just he was light skinned and had white person hair, not nappy black person hair), a slightly not quite right in his skin artsy, musicky boy, a red-headed irish-american fraternity guy, a glaswegian bloke (seriously, from *******, scotland) who was the only smoker i've ever kissed, a swiss computer engineer who is now a water shiatsu guru, a too high on himself and too skinny australian guy, an australian librarian who took me for rides on his motorcycle, a fella from manchester, england, another fraternity guy that was too short and too skinny for me. maybe one or two more i can't remember enough about...







:

oh and weird revelation i had on new year's eve this year: sometime this coming year will come the day where i will have been having s3x for more than half my life. (happened on new year's eve the very first time, that's why it was a weird revelation)

i'm so glad to be back from vacation and in touch with you all regularly (and maybe obsessively) again.







:

~claudia


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *TurboClaudia* 
now requested from library. thanks, els. i think i have perused that book (the just don't understand one) before. requested both.

_"haole"_ means "white person." _"haouli"_ means "happy."

dated/been intimate with: interesting... serial, long-term dated 3 italian-american men, one right after the other, 2 of which (the first and last) were extremely arrogant, which for some reason i find very attractive. various rebound dated/intimacy experiences with a few middle-class white boys of the not-fraternity type, a conservative jew, a very girly black guy (of the very light skinned variety -- not intended to be racist, just he was light skinned and had white person hair, not nappy black person hair), a slightly not quite right in his skin artsy, musicky boy, a red-headed irish-american fraternity guy, a glaswegian bloke (seriously, from *******, scotland) who was the only smoker i've ever kissed, a swiss computer engineer who is now a water shiatsu guru, a too high on himself and too skinny australian guy, an australian librarian who took me for rides on his motorcycle, a fella from manchester, england, another fraternity guy that was too short and too skinny for me. maybe one or two more i can't remember enough about...







:

oh and weird revelation i had on new year's eve this year: sometime this coming year will come the day where i will have been having s3x for more than half my life. (happened on new year's eve the very first time, that's why it was a weird revelation)


a) Yay for books from library!

b) ah!

c) Fascinating!!!

d) You are weird. But funny.


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

TC, let me know what your xanga username is, and I'll be happy to add you to my list!









I'm way way way more boring than y'all so I won't even list my past loves. 'Twould be a short list. :yawn

KK, heres to hoping your dh is on the mend!

Danile, just giving you some love and hope you are enjoying the babymoon. Katie lost her cord stump early and it bled, and actually looked open at one point, and my normally-level-headed-medical-degree-holding-dh sent us to the ER to have it checked out.

going to go watch some boob toob!

Oh, and Heather, I think dh's week off is the week before your trip to ME. Bummah. But he has to check something at work, so it may be subject to change, he may have a work obligation the week he already took off, so I'll see...


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Don't fret, Sherri....I'll just have to come for an extra week! ;-) Actually we talked about extending to two weeks at some point when the kiddies are older. I hope you guys can get a nice week vacay as a family whatever week it is! We'll have to trade notes on our fave places.

I'm wading through pics and uploading to winkflash. Note to self: do not not upload any pics for a year or more and then leave it to do all at once to take advantage of 6 cent sale. Printing pics is my very worst procrastinating problem.

okay...back to work...


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Alrighty MMF's-

Pics of Jasmine are now up on the blog.....


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Hi Mamas!

We got in latelatelate last night (veryearlythismorning, actually). The trip was not bad. Lily slept on the plane for the last 3 hours and was only mildly PO'ed to be woken up for 1.5 hours and then put back to bed at 1 am.







: Oh, and the airline sent her carseat to Cincinnati but they gave us a (crappy) loaner for the ride home. They are delivering ours to our doorstep tomorrow morning. Not as bad as it sounds, actually. Could have been worse - like all our luggage or something.

Love all your stories about past loves. My list is pretty short, too. Although I must add that one of my first loves was a death metal drummer with a mohawk. This was in high school, before DH.









KK, hope your family is on the mend. My DH has a horrible cold, but the pukies are much worse, I know.

So we got home at midnight last night, right, and this morning my DH went to Home Depot, rented a pneumatic floor nailer, and he and a friend put in the bamboo flooring in the office. He wanted to get it done before my quarter started. What a guy. Which left me to do the huge job of unpacking, but I'm not complaining. Lily was happy to be home amongst her long lost toys so I got a lot done. The entire contents of the office are in our kitchen and dining room, however, so it doesn't really feel like things are in order yet.

OK, more to respond to, but DH is dragging me away. Love to all!

S.


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## Jacqueline (Jun 11, 2003)

danile-sweet, sweet pics of Jasmine! I already kinda miss that little infant phase! It goes by soooo quickly. Thanks for sharing.

KK-yes, we're entering to win the Dream House, too, though I haven't done it for a couple days. We'd probably sell it and then get our real dream house. Though I'd like to take one vacation there first!

mcsarahb-glad you got back okay and that lily was such a good traveler. bet you are glad to be back! bamboo floor sounds awesome.

elsanne-yay for presents! That's cool.

re: former partners: my list is soooo boring, no need to share, either. You all just about know the whole story.

heather, I also procrastinate about getting prints made. But not as much as actually putting them in a scrapbook. I haven't done one since shortly after dh and I got married! That's 15 years, ladies. YIKES!

Also, dh hasn't had the big "v" done yet, either. Mostly, it's because our insurance has a very high deductible ($1000) if it will even cover it, which I doubt. With the $3000 worth of car repairs we've had in the last month, we're wiped out. We also sense a bit of a job change might be underfoot in the next year. So. We're going to use another method until we can have the surgery. I don't think I'm even o'ing yet, since we're bfing pretty much exclusively (though she can go for longer stretches at night). But, I really don't want to get pregnant again, so I'm a little skittish about this whole deal. I like NFP, but don't know how reliable it is while bfing....maybe I should consult the book.

I enjoyed hearing about the IUD from everyone, but I don't think that's the best solution for us. We're wanting to be way final.









Lots of snow last night, but dh had to drive to church. We're not braving it...plus, more snow is on the way! Time to take down the tree...today Christmas is officially over (good for procrastinators like me).

Oh, and dh and I got a baby sitter for our anniversary on Wednesday! It's only for two hours from 4-6 p.m., but is the first.time.ever. for us to use a sitter. It's an older lady from church who watched G the day A was born. Don't know what we're going to do; not enough time for a movie, really. Maybe just an early dinner. We haven't had any kind of date in over a year when my mom watched G and we saw a movie. I'm excited!

Better go eat some breakfast.


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Danile, I can't remember my info so I could log in and comment, just wanted to say that Jasmine is awfully darned cute!!

Dh says he's tired of lying down. Well, good. I really want to do some decluttering today (and finish the TYs and putting away the tree etc).

I watched both of the debates last night. I thought they were kind of interesting (also interesting how different the Republican one was from the Democratic). Haven't necessarily decided who I do like, but very convinced about who I don't like. (And I can't belieeeeve that this whole thing is set up to take so long... it's ridiculous, and a tremendous waste of time and money.)

My romantic history is similarly boring (when it's all basically about one person...).

Jacquie, A's not *that* old yet! Eek! (And are we duking it out for the Dream House? I'm not even sure I'd want a vacay in it first... I kind of feel like luxurious touches are kind of wasted on me...) What are you going to do for your DATE? (And curious and worried--what are thinking when you say job change might be afoot?)

Re BC talk and baby talk.... Is everyone done? Is anyone *not* done? (I'm sort of sitting on the fence for maybe one more, don't think dh is, though.) Anyone else thinking about the V? (So far so good here with the IUD, though I've had more crampiness than I would like.)


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

dream house sweepstakes? where? who? apparently, i feel the need to pay more stupid taxes somewhere other than powerball every now and again...









i am on the fence about one more child... very wistful about pregnancy, especially after this trip to hawaii, where it seemed there were a lot of people with tiny babies (well, tinier than stefan, who is almost 16 months old, so that's a lot of small babies) and a lot of pregnant mamas in bikinis... but definitely not right now, it's too soon, even shooed bill away one night a week ago when i was near ovulation time because just the idea of the possibility of getting pregnant right now freaks me out too much. so, basically i'm undecided...

okay, children are stinky and need a shower, so that must mean i need one, too.

~claudia


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## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

oh, I forgot a summer fling with an Australian lifegaurd. Damn, she was not so bright but that was hardly the point.









We are not going to have any more kids although I would love to be pregnant and have another birth. BC is not an issue obviously. When people ask us if we are having more kids we always respond, "not unless one of us accidently orders $1000 worth of frozen sperm in a drunken stupor!"

We're both a little weirded out by our all-girl family recently. We miss our best friends (the gay couple that refer to themselves as the girls' fairy godfathers) and we want more male energy in our lives. How exactly to achieve that is a little mind boggling.

Good to see our happy travelers Sarah and Claudia, and happy to see you back too, Renae.

Jasmine is TOO cute. Thanks for sharing pics!

Jacqueline - enjoy your date! Alison and I had a daytime date this week while my mom watched the girls. Totally nice (we went to see P.S. I Love You which was so-so).

High-ho, high-ho, it's back to work I go...


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

sweet jasmine pics







i love newborns. just love em!!

isaac and i just finished paying the bills and decorating the cards. he put all the stamps and address labels on the bills by himself. what a helper! he told me 'i'm doing work. my work is paying bills'









my most interesting love interest was a nepali prince. i dated a lot of asian guys in pakistan. a sharp skinhead in bakersfield. his best friend when i went to college. a couple of other boring white boys in college. i had one convergent best sex ever summer fling with a hot blond guy who was dumb as a rock. (i never dated blond guys.) and then i married the tall, dark and handsome mail boy









YES - on the night out idea, claudia









lisa - i'm weirded out by my all-male family









no more kids are wanted here but i had a dream last night that i was pregnant. and i keep thinking i am FEELING a baby. mega paranoia!

well, baby is napping and isaac wants to ride his big wheel in the basement while i sew.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Okay, so one of the things that I have to let go of if I am to return to MDC is the fact that if I miss PAGES and PAGES of posts and it takes me days, if ever, to catch up, then THAT IS OKAY!!! I always get all overwhelmed and then drop off the planet. I am not going to do that this time! I skimmed just now and if I can, I'll go back and read more in-depth later.







: Haha.
Claudia, welcome back! Glad you had a good time! I was only in the Poipu area for like, a day. We saw the Spouting Horn, played on the beach, and ate at Brenneke's (sp?) this great seafront restaurant. I am a vegetarian again (after I weaned Rowan my taste for meat just....went away.







So yeah) but I ate fish while I was there once or twice.







We were staying over by Lihue. Oh wow, I am all feeling nostalgic for it now! *sigh*

Anyway, and PANDORA! I have heard so many awesome things about it, and I think I have to just go get on there.
And get a Xanga account while I'm at it!







Heehee.

I am fighting a cold or cough or something, I have been since like NYE, but hey, I got through today without getting really sick, so I am thankful: today I gave the Winter Celebration service at our UU church, and our choir sang for the service, so I was a busy mama/lay-minister this morning/early afternoon! It went really well but I am also relieved it is over. Haha.

I think I am going dancing tonight, but I'm not sure. Probably not, since I KNOW I am going to karaoke tomorrow night! But I need the dancing exercise.
We'll see.

Rowan also got a haircut today! It's still long, but now it's not all in his face. I should REALLY post some pictures soon. Yes.

There I go getting all overwhelmed again!







Have a great night, mamas!









And oh man, the dating/intimate poll; I wanna chime in but maybe later! There are jerks, supermodel-beautiful women, dominatrixes and frigid b*tches, mexicans, puerto ricans, italians, and hot white boys who used to play football. To start.









Okay, later y'all.


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

my sewing excursion was brief.

i'm still massively in cleanup and organize mode around here but i had to take a break today. our bedroom is annoyingly out of control though so i want to finish it tomorrow. i need to go back to ikea to get some big boxes to label PURSES and HATS. i have about a million and i can't let go









paying the bills was depressing. and i *need* a haircut. i have blond streaks which are looking gnast now and i want to die them a deep cherry. my MIL told me they'd turn out green if i just did the supermarket dye. so i think i have to go to bishops and have them do it. but if anyone has experience and thinks i can just go feria.....let me know







it would save me about $40 or 50 to do it at home.

i want to see rowan pics!!!!


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Oh sheesh, I dye at home all the time. I just use the crappy bleach kit and then dye red over. I do usually use the semi-permanent, though, but I don't really think it's matters. Hasn't come out green yet.

My 3.5 year old just asked me put her to bed early because she was tired. What is going on here?







:


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Lisa-- hm. on the boy energy thing. Just, hm.







Maybe plan a rendezvous with their fairy godfathers for this coming year? *kind of scary, but possible* a male babysitter? Are there any family members near that you like, an uncle, cousin?

'Nae 'Nae, you are so totally overanalyzing your participation in this thread = overwhelm. Just, write whatever you feel like! Don't worry!

sarah, omg, ASKED TO GO TO BED? Whoa dude.


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

j - your mil is trippin. it won't turn out green. the stuff that makes blonde hair turn green is ASH - they use it in salons to make yellow bleached hair look more whitish, and if you leave it on to long, it will go to a greenish tint. you are good to go with red at home.
















mia JUST told me she was tired and wanted to go to bed, too. did i mention she has started napping again? at her own request! love it!

i spent the day at the SPA today! woo hoo for me! wrap, massage, yummy lunch, facial. sooooooooo nicey nice. thanks dh and kids for a great christmas gift!

bedtime for bonzos. gotta run.


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

i want spa. facial, pedi, massage, mmm... think i will request that for valentine's day... or maybe martin luther king day? think that would fly? gifts for mlk day? hmmm...







:

marek asked to go to bed while we were in hawaii. just once. it was weird. i was like, um... whose child are you? oh, and today, stefan was fussy, and i was wanting to check on my parents plane (they left today) and so i was bouncing him on my hip while i checked the 'puter and then he laid his head down on my shoulder and stopped fussing and ... (duh duh duh) fell asleep (wahoooooooooo) ... whose child is that? and then i laid him down on the bed and he STAYED asleep for just about an hour. weird and totally unlike him.

now i am looking at yoga classes, and i really feel like my core strength is going to sh*z and i want to do yoga again. i think i found one. i hope i like the teacher. they are both iyengar (like mcsb), which i like, although i have nothing to compare it to as that is all i have taken. will report after first class wednesday evening.

okay, must return to family life now.

~claudia


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## fiddlefern (Nov 9, 2003)

I was at the beginning of p. 2 today- got lots of catch-up reading to do.

Had to pause and say- JSTAR! Remember how we had talked about carpooling down to Cali? Well, I totally forgot about it, and I'm flying in, and I'll be there THE SAME TIME AS YOU! Isn't that weird? Leaving the 12th, returning the 17th. My pops gave me the ticket as a Christmas present. Gonna bring W on my lap, and leave dh and ds to fend for themselves for a week. I'm visiting my bestest friend since 5th grade and her newish babe.

Els- we celebrated 3 Kings Day (aka Epiphany) today too. Opened prezzies, talked to L about the wise men giving baby Jesus presents. Incidentally, in the past week L has developed a fear of not only monsters, but of WISE MEN. Isn't that wierd? He says, "the wise men will not get me?" He keeps talking about wise men in elevators. ??? My explanation that the wise men lived a long time ago and that they were kind and gentle and that there are no more wise men around has made little impact. ???









My mom was here a few days ago (to watch the kids during the big family meeting, which, by the way, went pretty well), and I told her that L was "into wise men." After which, L repeated about 1000000000 times, "we get into the wise men?" He didn't understand the expression, I think. I tried to explain that when we're "into" the wise men, we're interested in them, but he just kept saying, "we get into the wise men?" every few minutes.

About the job sitch- I'm not quite as excited as I was at first. I like the predictability of a regular schedule, I like getting paid to sleep, and I like the fact that basically I'm a grunt during my block shift with little need to think complex thoughts. I'm trading that for fewer hours at a higher pay, but a lot more stress. Though being recognized as having skilz is cool, and I DO like teaching. So I'm probably gonna do as they ask, but with some regrets.

OK, done with my all-about-me-post. (that's whatcha get when I don't post in forever, sorry).


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

Hi ladies!







I've been reading this thread on and off for a while and thought I'd introduce myself. I have a dd that was supposed to be born in May '04, but ended up coming at the end of April. She tried coming out bum first and ended up coming out via c/s. I just had another lo in May of this year.


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## fiddlefern (Nov 9, 2003)

ok, read a little farther- Claudia, welcome back! And yes, count me in to the pdx mama b-day bash, definitely.


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## fiddlefern (Nov 9, 2003)

Ok, one more green post. Gotta get off the net soon as my dh is doin all the cleaning again (have I mentioned before how much he rocks in the partnership dept.?)

meesa143- Welcome!







. If you've been reading along for awhile, you know what you're in for. We're a pretty friendly bunch (if I do say so myself, she said ever-so-humbly), but we talk a ton. Jump on in!









While I'm on an all-about-me kick, I'll let ya'll know that W had a fever in the 100's for 3 days. He's just about over the end of the virus now. I am SO GLAD W is generally healthy and that I am through the desperately sick kiddo phase. When L was FTT he would get sick like 3 times a month, and he was always getting these tummy viruses where he would not take in ANYTHING for several days. Whereas W just kept nursing right through the worst of it. I never really had to worry about him. Makes me appreciate just how hard things were in the early days before/after the tube with L.

THANK GODDESS for healthy kids!




























.

My dating history:
1. Went out for pizza once with a guy FRIEND in high school. He was from India.
2. Went to one movie with a music major frosh year in college.
3. Dated a GI for 2 weeks the 2nd summer I lived in Hawaii after frosh year. Learned how to kiss. (please don't be too shocked).
4. Had a mutual desperate yearning friendship with another music major for the next 3 years of college. He dated others on and off. I did not ever date him (or anyone else), unless you count the endless hours we spent writing each other poetry, dancing, and composing music together. But technically, we never dated.
5. Dated dh for 3 years. Married him. Did the deed for the first time. Yup.

So, no May Mama is allowed to dispariage their dating history! Ya can't get much more minimal than that.







Signing off for the night.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

I'm another in the very boring and short dating history. But maybe I'm the only one who met her DH on a blind date??

Welcome, Meesa!! Took a quick peek at your blog--what a beautiful family! Jump on in! :-D

Okay...must get going and get the two littlest dressed and ready to go grocery shopping while C is in school. I swear she couldn't get out the door fast enough this morning. She loves her little friends, teachers and the school routine. She has changed so much in the past year and it makes me want to







: or something.

ff---sorry the job change isn't more totally positive, but we can never know all the changes that might arise when we change one thing. Hoping it brings some unexpected perqs!

okay...must. quit. dawdling! love starting my morning/week off with my mmf!


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Welcome, Meesa







: I too checked out your blog and you are all beautiful!

Yesterday I had my monthly class for out-of-towners and 15 people came! Wahoootie! I had a great time, gave a good class, and afterward went out with several of them and we talked for HOURS. From 2.30 - 7 pm, and Viet was cool with childcare virtually alllll day. he has an easier time of it in general, the girls are not so needy with him or anyone else as they are with me. Of course, I came home and the house was amazingly trashed, but that bothers me not a bit.

gotta run but have more to say....


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Welcome Meesa! Glad you decided to jump in! I checked out your blog too and you have a super family! We let the girls open one present on Christmas eve and it's always new pajamas. It's a fun tradition. I have two girls, Sarah is five and katie is three. She was due in April but had to be evicted in May.









Els, yay for a great class! Sounds supahdupah fun!

TC, what's your xanga username? so I can add you to my list!

KK, how's the plague at your house?

fiddle, have a great trip to visit your friend! Sounds like so much fun! and you are going to rock your new job, I just know it!









I use the drug-store hair color kits all the time and have never turned green! Maybe you could do the semi-permanent one that washes out in 28 shampoos or something?

Happy Monday to all. Need to get motivated to do something...


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

Motivated. Hmm, concept









My dating history isn't that interesting, but it's more interesting than I wish it was IYKWIM. My first (not love) was a Bolivian lifeguard, also my boss, and also (it came to light later) doin' one of my best friends at the time. Then there was my big high school crush, who ended up... doin' one of my best friends at the time. First real boyfriend came along my freshman year of college - we dated for two years and he graduated, which was a blessing, since we were both to codependent to end the darn thing. I left that relationship saying, "Never again will I let things go unsaid" and that's probably why DH and I are together after 13+ years. I can't say I have any regrets, but if I had to do it again I'd do it differently, and I hope I'm able to share that in a positive way with my girls (and boy, I suppose?) when the time comes.

Renae, I also get overwhelmed, but more because I read several times a day but can't always post. So I'm never 'behind' on reading, but I have a list a mile long of things I want to reply to, and that leads to the same place - overwhelm!

So lemme just say I *love* the AllAboutMe posts!








: meesa! I'm a latecomer too, and my maybaby was born in the middle of June. (She's my middle, I have an almost-6 year old girl and a 17-month boy.)


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

Els, your use of the hand clapping smilie had me cracking up. You are SUCH a dance teacher!!!!







(I've been meaning to post that for days now!)

Welcome Meesa!









You guys don't even want me to go down my list of lovers. It's embarrassingly long. (Okay, so maybe it's ME that doesn't want to go down the list!







) But I can tell you it's been comprised of white boy jocks (high school - the main one was my one again off again bf who was the STAR basketball player and therefore everyone thought he could do no wrong







), wealthy "Sociales" mexican boys (high school), older guys in college who should have been done graduated long before i got there, a loooooooooong, self imposed dry stint, followed by a few black guys, a smattering of various women, one who I still think about to this day and wonder where she is, what she's doing (where's the wistful smilie?), and then DH (for the newcomers sake, I will point out what most of you know - he's black). We've been together for almost 12 years now. A few very rough years in there, but we've turned the corner and things are looking UP and feeling GOOD around here.









Even the condensed version was mortifyingly too long.







:

And to wrap up the AM post..... school starts today! WaaaaaaaaHoooooooooie!!!!!!!!!!


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

I have a very short dating history too.

The first was just before high school. We dated on and off for 3 years. That was a bad time in my life and it was a bad relationship. Anyway, he ended up joining the airforce our senior year and I used that as a reason to leave him.

Two was on one of those off times with number one. We dated for a couple months and I got really bored so I called it off. We stayed friends and he came to my wedding and cried







:

There were a few dates before I went out with DH that aren't worth mentioning, but that's it.


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mcsarahb* 
Oh sheesh, I dye at home all the time. I just use the crappy bleach kit and then dye red over. I do usually use the semi-permanent, though, but I don't really think it's matters. Hasn't come out green yet.

ok - i'll just get the cut and do a home jobby....like tomorrow! i seriously need sprucing up

Quote:


Originally Posted by *fiddlefern* 

Had to pause and say- JSTAR! Remember how we had talked about carpooling down to Cali? Well, I totally forgot about it, and I'm flying in, and I'll be there THE SAME TIME AS YOU! Isn't that weird? Leaving the 12th, returning the 17th. My pops gave me the ticket as a Christmas present. Gonna bring W on my lap, and leave dh and ds to fend for themselves for a week. I'm visiting my bestest friend since 5th grade and her newish babe.


hey that's wild







(and cool) are you going to LA? we're flying to burbank on the 16th. my first solo plane trip with both boys. i'm skeeered!!!!!! mostly because ebin is so wriggly now. hopefully isaac will be well-behaved

(how were the boys on the plane claudia?)

if we ever make it to thailand (which we dream of) we'll probably see my thai ex-bf. he was my first love. i think doug will be somewhat....wierd about it. but they have this great and wonderful family and i am friends with his sister (well both of his sisters but one lives in new york and one in bangkok).

meg - your spa day sounds lovely! doug got me a spa massage and foot treatment for christmas. i need to figure out when to do it. i'm definitely looking forward to it.

today is a grocery and cleaning day around here. and now taking the cat to the vet has been added to the list. she has an abcess and big bald spot on her side where i think she licked herself bald. and this is our cat who is wild and extremely difficult to get into a crate. she rolls up in a ball and bunny kicks. i have scars.

hi meesa!









i suppose i should do something around here..........







:







:







:


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

sherri: xanga username same as here.







:

and let me clarify, that history of people (who all happen to be men, hmmm... yet my visions of growing old are with a woman???) is mostly the ubiquitous one-night stands.

and omig8sh, i just remembered the almost relationship that never was because the dang former australian rugby player/rock climber/ architect decides to kiss me the NIGHT BEFORE i left australia for good instead of 2 months before! he and the swiss guy were the long sinewy type which i am usually not attracted to at all, hence my hotties for jack black types.










whiny babe must be done with his







:

welcome meesa!

~claudia


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

my vision of growing old has changed. i was reading birth charts for ebin, doug and i this weekend and doug's and mine were freakishly accurate. AND mine said i would die overseas at an old age. wierd huh? maybe i will make it back to pakistan some day!! (i would love to).

ebin is apparently going to be a flaky guy who can't focus on any one thing and constantly needs something new (including lovers). i haven't read isaac's yet. i think i'll check it out right now. my 'doing something' consisted of putting babe down for nap and eating a bowl of cereal and well....still sitting on my duff here







:


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

jstar: where are you reading these birth charts at?


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

http://astro.cafeastrology.com/cgi-bin/astro/natal

hmm. isaac's was very contradictory. but both my boys are gemini with a saggitarius rising. wierd.

kinda fun to read.

ok. now. really off to get some stuff done around here


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Meesa, came to your wedding and cried? *sigh* How effing sweet. Are you with the right guy? (jk! jk! jk! I don't know you so I can't be too obnoxious yet)

I swear I need more than one. One to protect, provide, etc., and one for good lovin and perfect presence at all times.


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Happy Monday Mamas!







(Where's that false-happiness-too-shrill-trying-not-to-cry smilie when you need it?) Not feeling so thrilled about being back in the school daze myself. Already feeling overwhelmed and school starts tomorrow. Arrgh. Deep breath. Must organize. Organization can conquer all, right? RIGHT?

Hello to Meesa! Jump on in.

Loving the all-about-Fiddle posts.









I am jealous of your spa day, Meg. I want one, too.

Elsanne, yay for your good class. Feels good to have people like your stuff, I know.

Already did some errands, went grocery shopping, and have dinner in the slow cooker. Hey, it's still morning on the West Coast.







Now off to empty out my backpack from last quarter and sharpen my new pencils, so to speak.

Toodles poodles

Sarah


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Definitely not







: here today! It was a coats off at the park day after getting C from school. Need to rouse the girlies from naps and throw a snack at them and go outside! in a t-shirt!

sarah--bummer! I wish you endless refills of your favorite wintry beverage from my iCoffeePod to get you through!

laundry, then girlies... I'm notorious for neglecting/forgetting about laundry in progress! I need a roomba version of a washer/dryer that will scour the house for dirties/wash/dry/fold/PUT AWAY/repeat!


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

I can't identify with the icoffeepod... I am just one of those "I'll listen to whatever everyone else is listening to" people.







: And I took the plunge--I switched back to black tea from coffee.







I can feel a difference... (we'll see how long it lasts...







)

I'm in a big toot about going through ALL of the toys and sorting them (for stuff to donate, recycle, throw away) and organizing them. Dude, it's HARD to do that with kids in the mix.







:

I have to tell you guys about a cool thing I just did: I posted on our Freecycle that I was looking for plant cuttings (I want to get back into having houseplants... (L has been much more civilized toward our one plant than the boys ever were, so I figured it's time) we ditched all the plants when we moved here in winter from CA). I'm about 1/2-way through picking up a *ton* of cuttings, plus someone has given me 5 plants, too. It's so awesome. It makes me feel like *me* again.

I'm in the thick of enrollment at Z's preschool (dunno if I ever mentioned that that is my volunteer job there). Eek, there are some nutty parents out there (and they all want to enroll at *our* school!).

So there's my allaboutme post.







: Welcome, Meesa!


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

As if I post anything but... here is my all about me post...
















I tried to venture out of the house by myself today with all 3 in tow...

I made it halfway into town (we live in the country..) and Dominic started screaming that he had to pee NOW! I start scanning for a spot to pull over and Dom starts screaming at the top of his lungs, "MOMMY! ISAAC IS PUKING!!!! HELP HIM!!" I look in the backseat and Isaac is vomiting everywhere... I whip over to the side of the road, check on isaac, pull Dom out to the field and let him pee.. I go home and stick the kids in the bath and pull them out... Dom's body is covered in hives... (he puked again in his sleep on saturday night btw) Isaac runs around and plays... then pukes all over the couch and floor...

so now I'm ready to cry and am wondering if this was a sign that I am just supposed to stay home...

It's TJ's bday and my trip to town was to get his birthday dinner and stuff to make a cake....







:


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

Oh, honey, I have had those days. Feels like the universe is out to get you!! Curl your kiddos up on a couch with a bowl nearby and make yourself some tea. I'd come make it for you if I could!

I'm so sorry your babes are sick. It's so much to handle







: You're doing awesome and It Will Pass.







:


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

oh man, danile, that stinks! puke bugs are not allowed to interfere with you getting your mama groove on! Reminds me of being up to my ears in it when C had roto 3x when E was teeny tiny. Anyone who can tend to puke solo gets a major award in my book!

kk--yay for cuttings! I see people offer them up now and again on our freecycle, but I haven't asked for any as I wouldn't know what to do with them. I wish I knew more! Our yard is sorely lacking.

nuggets!! where are you? I've been enjoying peeking at your sketches that pop up on your blog in my feed reader now and again.

hehehe....watching tv and the commercial just came on w/ the "I'm into nuggets now....I'm into nuggests now..." song--- mcd's, but hey, it could be our own they were rapping about.









okay...I'm babbling and should be sleeping! crazy busy day tomorrow.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

That nuggets. She needs to poke her head in here more often.

Danile, I groaned aloud for you, that is truly awful. I really hope the sickies go away and I swear, puke and diarrhea are really some of the worst in small children. Or big ones, if they don't make it to the toilet. It does not seem fair to have those days at all, let alone on TJ's birthday!!!! Oh honey.


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## fiddlefern (Nov 9, 2003)

Sarah, it's gonna be ok. You can do it.





















. I don't know about you, but things always seem impossible to me after an exhausting day. Then the next morning, everything seems possible. (The truth probably being somewhere inbetween). This is a very hard thing you're doing, but you're gonna get through it, and in the end you'll get to catch babies for a living! I'm hoping this quarter the babies just pop out like crazy during your hospital shifts, so you can make up your birth-assistance numbers without a ton of hours. More







s

Danile, your dh should give you major points for even attempting to get out of the house with 3 (2 of whom are sick) what, less than 2 weeks after you gave birth? You are an amazing mama. I suppose living in the country you can't just order pizza and call it good. Perhaps you can reschedule his b-day celebration?









Els- cool about the great class, and even cooler about V takin on the girls so you could just be YOU for a bit with some other adults, and get a break from being the mamamamamamamamamama.

Megan- I am really glad things are going well with dh right now.







That does my heart good to hear.

Jstar- yup. L.A. Didya get the kitty to the vet OK?

L starts preschool again tomorrow.








Time to wash the dishes. Fun, fun.


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 
Meesa, came to your wedding and cried? *sigh* How effing sweet. Are you with the right guy? (jk! jk! jk! I don't know you so I can't be too obnoxious yet)

He was crying while telling DH he is a lucky man.









I'm sorry about the sick kids. Maybe it was a 24 hour thing and he'll be better today. Hopefully you all got some sleep!


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Awww, Danile! That totally sux! I hope whatever it is passes quickly.







Hope you and TJ stay healthy through it all. Yesterday was my dh's birthday, too!

Heather, thinking of you on yoru busy busy day!

Need to get moving. Today's my parent helper day at katie's school, so I gotta run! Just wanted to give Danile a big









Hope skool is not too daunting for you today, Sarah.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Either I get overwhelmed when I DON'T come here everyday to read, OR I pretty much read (and ADORE) EVERYTHING everyone posts, then don't want to make the Longest Post in the Universe to reply to it all!







I can't win, so I'll just deal! *grin*
I







you all so much! You all are sunshine I don't even know how I did without when I was absent!









So um...today I am ridiculously hungover.







: The straightedge vegan nuns (or maybe just Davey Havok) are frowning upon me I'm sure. My best friend L. took me out for my birthday last night, and we went to a nice noodle house for dinner, and then to karaoke at our friendly neighborhood gay bar...where she proceeded to pay for my drinks.
The night and subsequent morning went a little something like this:

















































uke







:














:

L. considers my birthday outing a success!







I think I am old enough to KNOW BETTER!







:

But I am recovering and having lots of cuddling on the couch with Rowan so that's really nice.








I feel a little guilty for allowing the PBS binge this morning but it's not like it happens ALL the...time...wait.









Ahem. Anyhow, so I don't have much to say right now







but I wanted to say hi because really, starting the morning by reading up on my favorite MMF really does make the day that much better.

And WELCOME, Meesa!







I'm not a lush, I swear to god.









Have a wonderful day, everyone! Dude, it's supposed to be like 60 degrees here in New England. I am totally weirded out. Heh. Even as bad as I feel, I think we must make a sojourn outdoors sometime today.
Rowan's music class starts up again tonight, and DH is about as excited about it as he is!







It's the last one in the cycle of classes in this series (Music Together) and I am thinking back on the very FIRST one, where Rowan was like 6 months old when we first started going. I need the wistful smilie now!
I was gonna try out a yoga class this evening when they went to class but, um, I may wait till Saturday!







:

Take care, lovely mamas!


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

So cute about the Music Together.

Love the smilie parade, it truly tells the whole story. Glad you had "fun" on your birthday. I am getting so old, I think. It doesn't sound like that much fun anymore (except the first part, minus 1 or 2 of the drinking smilies)....that part, yeaaaah! I'd be rockin out and dancin witcha.


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

Renae, I'm glad you had fun! Big







for the aftereffects. Hooray for PBS!

My younger sister had her first baby last night







I'm such a whirlwind of emotion on her behalf. She pushed for four hours before consenting to forceps. She cried when she told me, and I just wanted to hug her and tell her what an amazing job she did. Baby Boy is nursing well







It's a good thing I'm not having any more because even living vicariously through her her is making me an emotional wreck!!


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Yay for bday celebrations for old ones and new young ones!

I am







. E stuck a sticker up her nose apparently and on hold w/ the peds office. A tiny sticker she got at her PT appt. No more of those! grrr...


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Aw, heath. A sticker! One time my brothers were roughhousing and one bro stuck a tiny piece of orange peel up the other's nose, and we had to go to the emergency room to get it out. It's a funny memory I have, but it wasn't funny at the hospital!


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Heath, if it's still stuck, try this...

Hold closed the empty nostril with your finger. Put your mouth over E's mouth and blow hard. Item should pop out the clogged nostril. This is the maneuver they try in the ER before going and digging it out with long forceps.


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

We used that same method to get a bead out of Saige's nose a few months ago.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

TJ is vomiting and all three boys have diahrrea now.







: What a happy birthday for him. At least I don't have it. And I don't have a sticker up my nose.

So sorry Heath! Hope that it gets out soon. What goes in must come out right? I remember my brother wadding paper up his nose when he was about 2. He tried to hack a lugie at my mom while she was changing his diaper and it came out of his nose covered in mucous and landed right back on his face. Angry two year old boys just don't understand gravity I suppose.









Thanks for all the support mamas... yesterday was just a no good very bad day. I loved your comfort and support.

Welcome Meesa! I too and a secret snoopy blog peeker... and your family IS adorable. I love the vegetarian learning experience too. How cute!

I feel bad whining about my own problems... I just heard that a girl in my DDC that I LOVED talking to.. and was my swap recipient lost her baby in labor.


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

I'm in the midst of another round of job apps. Don't really want to go into it (here or now), but just send me good vibes.









Danile, dude, we had that virus, and it SUCKS. I think the timing is particularly cruel in your case.









Ug on stickers, beads, paper, etc....







:

Woo on babies, long lost MMs, birthdays, etc.









The cuttings are for houseplants (outside is still fairly frozen). I think I'm going to spend my Xmas gift card on orchid pots...








:

With that... we're going to the neighbors' for dinner here in a minute, and then I'm going bowling with my buddies afterward. My hair, for lack of a better word, is totally schifo (anone speak Italian?). Oh well. Time for a hat, I guess... or a







:.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

this feels like my version of a no good very bad day for reasons I'm too bummed to get into. Feeding issues/reflux suck/s.

danile---hugest hugs! next week will be better!

I couldn't even see the pesky thing it was jammed so far up so DH is at the ER now with her. Bet she won't do that again, poor girl. Was sad to see her go off all chipper w/o realizing what was going to happen. She kept telling me she just wanted to go see Dr. S, our chiro.


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Heather and







Danile. No good very bad days go away.


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

heath and danile: bad days go away...
















heath: did you see the LC today with HJ? what was her thinking?


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

LC visit went well; she was very nice and really seemed to get the nature of his issues. She gave me a couple ideas for positioning things that seem to help a bit with him fatiguing with feeds. But the crux of it is that his intake needs to be better and we may be able to get by w/ just half of the difference w/ supplementing pumped milk. le sigh. Talking it through, realistically he doesn't nurse well or consistently enough or for comfort enough to make the sns/lactaid work. GI closed tomorrow, but will call to talk to the NP thurs or friday about the LC visit. So things are very much the same as it all went w/ E, but better and worse at the same time. He *is* still nursing well enough, but supplementing was quite an ordeal this evening. rock me hard place.









exhausting day to say the least.

er visit was a joke. dh said the doc looked up her nose with the thingy you look in ears with, but no camera scope or anything because she wasn't in pain. wtf? so he just guessed that she swallowed it and sent her home. I'll let you know in 24 hrs if that was the case.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Aww, I just wanted to offer







s and love to Heather and Danile. Sorry your days hadn't gone so well.








I have a headache again. But I did redeem my lazy-mama status by taking Rowan to a nearby park this afternoon after rest time and he ran into a neighbor girl he plays with, who goes to the school next to the park, and they played happily for a good hour.








And we walked, and no one needed a jacket!







Weird New England weather!

Anyway, I am going to bed soon so I just wanted to say good night. Hope everyone has a good day tomorrow! I have a long day (LLL thing and then work) so I may not be online much, unlike today when my butt was parked on the couch.
















Good night mamas!

ETA: I sucked it up and started a xanga account, just so I could read those darn protected blogs! :LOL mamafaery's the name, it's probably gonna stay empty, I mean I don't even update my LIveJournal, man! Hahaha. So anyway, yeah. Who had xanga again??


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## fiddlefern (Nov 9, 2003)

Danile, I am sorry about your MDC friend, and sorry that you're having to deal with so much sickness. I really hope you don't get it!

Heatherfeather- Three has got to be so much work, and just the stress of worrying about weight and tracking intake is so much work, and then to have to take time out to pump on top of it all. Well, that's just no fair. I have just (pretty much) come out of the woods myself in terms of all that weight/intake worry, so all I can do is hold up a candle and say, you won't have to do this forever! There is an end in sight! Your babies will get older and eat on their own, and you can do this (because you have to- sigh).









Renae- you totally crack me up. I love ya, mama! Welcome back.

Quote:

I feel a little guilty for allowing the PBS binge this morning but it's not like it happens ALL the...time...wait.
(my attempt at quoting)

Juice- a vicarious congratulations to you









KK- best of fortune with the job apps. May it all turn out as it's supposed to.

KK and Jacqu- this is silly and probably impossible (too lazy to find out how far away each of you lives from Denver), but I'm gonna be in the Denver airport with W Jan 13th from 2:12 pm to 5:12 pm, and then again Jan 17th from 12:34 pm to 1:15 pm. I have a very good friend who goes to school in Denver so she'll probably keep me company, but if either of you are gonna be in the hood on those dates, swing by!









Sherri- do you do a co-op preschool? How do you like the parent days? I kinda wish L's school had parent days, mostly cause I can't get enough of hangin out in classrooms.









Thinkin of Sarah today, and wishing you a good quarter.


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *fiddlefern* 
KK and Jacqu- this is silly and probably impossible (too lazy to find out how far away each of you lives from Denver), but I'm gonna be in the Denver airport with W Jan 13th from 2:12 pm to 5:12 pm, and then again Jan 17th from 12:34 pm to 1:15 pm. I have a very good friend who goes to school in Denver so she'll probably keep me company, but if either of you are gonna be in the hood on those dates, swing by!









I might be able to swing the 13th (much easier than a weekday, longer block of time). I will probably have to sweeten the deal for dh by bringing at least 1 kid with me (I'm thinking T/L, or possibly just Z or T/Z). I'll get back to you.









I think Nuggets does a coop preschool (we do, too). The parent days are awesome (it's like "Queen for a Day"). The way our schedule works, we only coop ~1x/2 mo., so it definitely doesn't feel like a burden (I'd be willing to coop 1x/mo.).

Heath, I can't believe you're having to do through the reflux/feeding/pumping/UG again... I guess the only silver lining I see is for HJ (ie, lucky that he has a mom who's in tune and knows what she's doing). Major kudos to you for not listening to that nurse and pursuing LC help--you're really awesome, IMO.


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

Ugh. Rough morning here. I learned something very hurtful. I'll just copy and paste what I posted in Blended Families forum.

Quote:

*Stepson admits to lying about me to his mom... I am so hurt*

This morning has been a huge lesson for me: Do Not Ask Question You Don't Want To Know the Answer To

DSS is 15 and lives with us. He has lived here for almost 4 years, due to his mom basically begging us to take him because his behavior was so out of control with her. He is developmentally delayed and has lots of special needs and he needs constant supervisions (can not be left at home alone, etc). Because I am a SAHM and my DH works a lot and has a long commute, I do the majority of his caretaking. I provide all meals, help with homework, ask him to do his chores, etc.

This morning I noticed DSS had a new folder. Okay, no big deal. I asked him where he got it. He said his mom bought it for him. I asked him if he had told her he needed it, because he already had a folder that he does not use (he is in special ed and has no need for a folder - they don't send homework home that way). He told me, "I told her I needed one. Because I wanted one." Then I asked the question I wish I had never asked. "Did you tell her you need one but that I won't buy one for you?" "Yes." "Why did you do that? That's not true." "I dunno... I do that all the time so I can get what I want." "You tell her lies about me often?" "Yes."

I am so hurt. Crushed. But it all makes perfect sense now. His mom and I have never been buddy buddy, but we have always made an effort to be civil. But in the past year or so, she has become increasingly icy towards me I didn't really understand why. I know DSS gets upset because we hold him accountable for his actions here (mom doesn't) and we expect him to help out around the house (mom doesn't). Of course, I would expect him to talk to him mom about this, but I would expect his mom to talk to him as a parent and let him know we are doing these things to help him become a responsible adult, not turn icy towards me like she has been. But now it all makes sense. Goddess only knows what he has said about me to her. And she's clearly believing whatever he says, despite the fact that we have a HUGE issue with DSS lying and she knows it.

I don't what to do, or if there is anything to do. I don't even want to mention it to DH because he will most likely want to address it with her, but they have such a bad relationship, I think it will only cause more problems. I guess I jsut wanted to vent about it here to people who might sort of understand.

I just feel so hurt. I have taken over a huge amount of responsibility for this child and this is the thanks I get. Lies told about me and she just accepts them as truth and treats me coldly when she sees me. I feel so taken advantage of. She often just assumes I will be here to care for him if she is running late to pick him up on her visitation days. I am a SAHM and for the most part, I am around, but I hate the assumption that I have no where else to be, especially now that I know there are lies being told about me and she's apparently believing them, but still having no problem expecting me to pick up her slack.

Thanks for listening. If you disagree with me or have a dissenting opinion, that's fine, but I really came here for support, so please be kind.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Oh Meg. I can't even imagine.
















If I had any sort of good advice I'd give it. Let me stew a little bit and maybe I can come up with an idea. That is, if you want one. If you just want my support and sympathy- you know you already have it.


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

megan: major kudos to you for parenting him the way you should and huge hugs for feeling burned by his sheer meanness and manipulative actions. he may be 15, but he is still acting like a smaller child and i know that would be hard for me to stomach. i'm so sad for you. i can't remember if you drink coffee, but i wish icoffeepod was real and could whip you up some frothy $tarbuck$ concoction to make you feel all warm and cozy and then play you some mournful music followed by something hopeful and uplifting.


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

aw meg that sucks







how frustrating. i think i would leave your dh out of it and address it with her directly. call her or if possible have a talk with her out of dss' earshot when she comes to pick him up. just say 'so i had a talk with __ the other day that really concerned me. <insert convo> i'm worried that he may be telling you various different things that aren't true. i would really appreciate it if you have any concerns about what he is asking for that you just call and ask me.

that way you don't sound overly accusatory about his behavior (because she will be defensive about that). and you open an avenue for communication between you two. also by making your concern about the 'things' he is asking for (ie. for her to buy him) you don't make it sound like you think he's lying about things that you 'do'. but you'll raise her consciousness that he is capable of manipulating his situation.

danile - i hope everyone is on the mend at your house. what a bummer of a birthday for tj! and that is so sad for your mdc friend.

beth - you're a travelling woman









heath - (heath and beth sound good together). so sorry you're on the same rollercoaster with HJ and feeding stress. i hope he can groove on bottle and boob together.

renae - your weather sounds freaky!

sarah - more baby-catching stars aligning wishes from me







:

juice - congrats on the new nephew









we picked jasmine up at the vet yesterday and she has the most gnarly HOLE in her side. bigger than a quarter and it is just flesh. where is the puke smiley. i was under the impression that he would be stitching it closed. but no. she's up in our room and actually using the litterbox and purring a lot. she's happy to be inside. poor thing! i have no idea how long it is going to take to heal up. he didnt' really tell me anything.

i have started looking on craigslist for an office. i feel displaced and am working more than i expected. and i don't have a functional office here. there's a breakfast nook off the kitchen but no door. and no plugs or heat in the basement so that isn't an option. my boss told me she had looked at an old mill they just converted into offices/loft workspaces. so i went by there and OMG I WANT ONE. of course all the smallest ones i could afford are leased already. and i do not need to pay 800/mo. but boy are they cool! giant windows, concrete floors. i'm going to call and see if i can get on some waiting list or something. and keep looking. i think they're turning every warehouse into lofts at this point. le sigh

ta ta mamas


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Geez, meg, you have every right to be upset! I've so often admired you for your tenacity and commitment to your relationship with J. That in and of itself is very admirable to me, without you having to deal with all this excess responsibilities on top of it all. You are so strong, most parters would be like, "he's not my problem, you deal with it" or something of the sort. Anyway, back to the matter at hand, I think Jstar gave you some good advice. I think that would be a great place to start. If you need to involve your dh at some point, you can, but I think it would be most helpful to start working it out without him. It's especially irritating that she doesn't want the responsibility of helping him through his special needs, and she depends on you to do that for her, yet she's willing to just listen and believe everything he says? Obviously she knows how challenging it is to parent him, or else she wouldn't beg you to take him. I'm just so infuriated for you, mama. I don't know anything helpful to say, other than you have my utmost support and love.

Danile, how's everyone feeling today? I hope today dawned a little brighter for the Ducettes.

A little mini-smilie parade for Juice's new nephew. I reserve the best smilie parades for our own may mamas, but this is most certainly smilie-parade-worthy!








:







:







:







:







:




























:







:







:







:







:


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Meg, that is heartbreaking. I agree that you are amazing and strong. It must hurt to have this happen after you've taken such awesome responsibility for this child. I am sorry to hear your DH's relationship with his ex is not good enough for him to be involved in this - IMO it's his problem just as much as yours (i.e., it's his child and you are taking on more than your standard responsibility for him). I do agree that you should talk to his mom, however, and hope that she gets at least a glimmer of the truth. Hugs, mama.

Jstar, I know the office thing is a PITA. When DH was looking he lucked into a basement in NW for $200, but it wasn't exactly a beauty. Great location, though. Do you need something that clients will visit, or just for you and a desk?

Danile, hope the sickies are gone.

Juice - new nephew! That is so fun. I know the feeling - I have a good friend in CA due any day planning an HBAC - I'm so on pins and needles for her! Just waiting for the good news.

Heather - hugs, mama, just hugs. You have been through so much. I haven't been there myself but feel so much for you!

School yesterday was so-so. Not too bad, but not great. I'm just getting tired of school in general after 25+ years, ya know??









We have a bite on our nanny share offer - someone finally responded to the craigslist ad we've been posting and reposting for months! Hopefully they will work out. It's been hard footing the entire bill ourselves for so long.

OK, must go work. Lots to do and I promised myself I would not procrastinate this quarter!!
















S.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Meg, first off, a big hug. You deserve so much credit for raising her son, loving him, educating him, and all the other things you do to make his youth a good one.

Second: I think this is being taken a little too personally. It has, really, nothing to do with you. There is truth, and your dss knows it, and he's being manipulative. Nothing new there! His mom has guilt which is probably bottomless, and she feeds off of providing for him what she is led to believe you are not, which makes her feel better. Mother and Son bond over perceived neglect by you, although both are well aware of your work and sacrifice. Keep on keepin' on, mama, hold your candle of truth and maybe, in a sweet moment, bring it up with your dss. Your hurt is valid, and maybe he can see your perspective if you bring it up at a good time, in a good way where both parties can be respectful.

Something like this:
You: "dss, I have to admit, that although I'm really happy you told me the truth when I asked you about the folder, I felt hurt that you tell your mom things about me that are not true. I feel hurt because I work so very hard to be a good mom to this family, and while I may not be perfect I do try hard. I am also happy that you have a relationship with your mom that works for you, but I feel disrespected by you and that hurts."

Dss: "Oh, Meg, I am so sorry, you absolutely are the most amazing woman my dad could have ever married and every day I give thanks for you...."
(okay, it's my fantasy, okay?)

Just an idea sweetie. Much love to you.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Els said it so much more eloquently than I ever could. I agree with all the girls that have suggested having a calm talk about things when the time is appropriate. *HUGS to you*

Things are a little brighter today. Less puking. TJ went back to work because we can't afford the time off.







Jasmine is VERY fussy today. I think we'll be living in the Mei Tai today. That's the only thing that seems to soothe her when she gets like this. I've done amazing things with this mei tai. I should take pictures of "oh all the places I've been"


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Holy moly, Meg. I would be both







: and crumpled into a small ball at the same time. I think his behavior probably has a lot to do with his age, his development, and his crappy mom. She *does* need to know about his behavior, but man, I have no idea how you'd communicate it effectively. Major







s for you.

Just here uh...







: saying howdy to my MMs while I doctor my resume...


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## fiddlefern (Nov 9, 2003)

Meg- ooooh! My first reaction was, "how can she be bitter towards the person who is raising her son for her?" but then I saw what others are saying about her guilt causing her to resent you. So not fair, but so human. She should be thanking you all the time for all that you do, but like her son, she is not in a place to see that. I would be angry and hurt, too.

Maybe maybe maybe if a conversation between the two of you went right, you'd end up bonding as the adults who are helping each other not to have the wool pulled over your eyes. What a tough situation!

Sarah- is this your last quarter, or second to last? Oh, and I hope the nanny share thing works out! Too bad jstar and I have the crazy double-boy-and-baby thing, since both of us are working and need childcare. Alas, I think three of those ages would be a bit much for one nanny.









Jstar- do you need a place to store a computer and files, or just a quiet place? I'm having this wild idea that the back room in our group home is never used except when I teach classes back there, and maybe our company would rent you shared use of the space for super-cheap. But it's just a crazy idea, off the top of my head.

Sooo sleep deprived- must get off the computer!


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## Jacqueline (Jun 11, 2003)

Hey fiddle-I hope KK can come see you on the 13th! Denver is about 3 hours away from us...and over 2 mountain passes. So, not really an option to me. But, I hope you have a good trip.

Meg-just a







from me. Others have said some wonderful things and I agree.

danile-I hope everyone is feeling better.







to you, too.

hf-geesh, sorry you have to go through this again.









We must have all needed some good hugs!

KK-I'll prob. update on dh's job sitch at some point oy. It's kinda complicated...

We got loads of snow yesterday. It was our anniversary, and, if you recall, we'd gotten a babysitter. Well, we had to cancel cause we really didn't want to go out in the snow. We will reschedule. It's kind of appropriate that we got all the snow, though, as on our wedding day 15 years ago a 100-year-old snowfall record was broken and prevented a lot of people from attending (we were married in Topeka, Kansas).

G has Lunch Bunch today, so I get a couple free hours with Annie---gonna get the oil changed....fun!


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Oh Meg.







I wish I had sweet eloquent words like Els to give you, but I can give you my ear--er, eyes, and you know we support you. What a crappy thing to have to deal with. I have another friend with stepdaughters who is dealing with much the same situations, and it's just a shame.







You're not alone, and you are doing an awesome job.









Aww, I wish I was able to be the nanny for those of you who are looking for one!







I am a nanny for a five-month-old, as I'm sure I mentioned. I think I'm pretty darn good at it.







I'm not sure I could deal with more than one other kid besides Rowan at a time though!














Maybe two others. I believe the limit for a day care teacher is 4 kiddos at once? Not sure. Haha. I used to be left alone with 5 or more kids REGULARLY when I was a teacher.









Danile, glad the pukies are on their way out.







Hang in there, mama.

Well, today DH took my car to get the oil changed, so I am stuck with his car, which I hate driving, so I guess we're not going anywhere.







I am doing laundry and Rowan is watching Superwhy







: He knows what time the darn show is ON, man. We vacuumed earlier. Since it's a much colder day out, but sunny, I'm not really sure whether we'll go out or not. Maybe we'll walk to the library and drop off the books that are um, late.







:

I guess I ought to get off the computer if I'm to do that soon!







Okay, here I go.

Have a great day, everyone!
I'm really glad my return has amused so many of you.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Don't worry... no shame. I'm a habitual library overdue offender. I've learned that my fines are really helping to keep the library going...
















Doing a little better today. I'm late on my anthropology work... Jasmine was extremely fussy yesterday. I'm wondering if she caught a touch of what the boys had because it involved stomach cramping too. So combined with the pukiness she typically does anyhow and then the fussiness... that was my guess. I'm not concerned- she certainly nurses enough.

She's two weeks old today and already a totally different baby than when we first met her. She's so alert and focuses on us and she's gotten SO strong when it comes to holding her head up. Her features are also changing into what she's going to look like... I LOVE IT! How does it go that fast though? Wow. Her appt. is tonight.. I'll let y'all know what she weighs now..

Gonna try and fight for my financial aid today... we'll see how it goes.


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

ahh so many wise perspectives from you mamas







i love it

can i express how horrible bedtimes have become around here?? ebin has entered a new stage where he has to stop nursing and sit up every.time.he.hears.a.noise. the ol rock and nurse to sleep has stopped working in any reasonable timeframe. of course there is tons of noise here. both kids have been up until 10:30 or 11pm more often than not lately







:

office space. i need a place for my computer and files and a worktable. i will inevitably have a client come by at some point i think but it doesn't need to be fancy. i don't plan on big meetings or whatever. but i do work with other people (subbing to them or them subbing to me) so i need a little space to sit and spread out. preferably i want a place with free wi-fi because paying for my own will probably be $100+ a month on top of whatever rent i pay. they stick it to you if you have a business account. i saw one place a month ago i should have jumped on. it was a small office for $245 in a building with free wi-fi. i think they even had a communal conference room and it was in the SE industrial area which is where i want to be. doug's office is in milwaukie so i want to be conveniently located for running down there.

i'm doing the debate though between getting something for $200 where i can only fit a desk or going for something for $500 where i could stay for 5 years. i'm on a 5-year plan i think. i also need 24/7 access because of working wierd hours around deadlines. i plan on a playspace too for the kids. (plenty of cube-share buildings out there but i need a door so my chitlins do not disturb the rest of the world). i got a lead to call a bike planning co who just bought a building and may have extra room so i'm going to try that today. the good thing is that i don't really have a deadline so i can look for a while. i've been using doug's office and he is giving me a hard time - mostly in jest. but i do need something. it's a pain

i had traffic school last night







: but it was really interesting. i learned a lot about pedestrian laws.

ok. must shower after blabbing on too long about my office


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

Meg~What a crappy situation. I wish I had wise advice for you, but I agree with what was already said. He is very lucky to have you, even if he doesn't realize it now, he will later on.

Saige loves superwhy!

Danile~I'm glad the kids are feeling better. Sending you *no puking* vibes

jstar~Kade does that a lot. It seems like there is so many things going on that are more interesting than eating







It gets annoying.

We had a minor crisis this morning. DH forgot S's show-and-tell. He called me at work and I could hear her crying in the background. I called my sil that lives just down the street from the preschool and had her bring something winnie the pooh(it's W week). It's times like this I feel like supermom


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Meesa- Thanks for the vibes. Revel in your supermomness... we all need days like that. It's great to be the hero.


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

I think I mentally replied about Katie's school, but not physically. Sorry 'bout that. Her school is not technically a co-op, but there are parent helpers assigned for each school day. The parent generally just helps around the classroom, like helping wash the kids' hands, passing out snacks/drinks, cleaning up, reading stories to the kids, playing along with the free-play time. It's a lot of fun, and so neat to see Katie in that environment. There are about 15 kids in her class, so only going twice a week, I am only assigned to be the helper three or four times this year. But I enjoy it when I do go. There is one teacher, one assistant teacher, one parent helper, and usually a college intern, so its a pretty good kid to adult ratio. She came home with the cutest little penguin today. It's her footprint for the body, and eyes and a nose, and a pasted on white oval belly.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Very cute! I love footprint/handprint work.


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

i love the handprint/footprint work too. i have so many from isaac's babyhood (even including a 'pumpkin-butt' print from halloween). and none for ebin because he's a home-baby. i guess that means i need to do some prints myself!! actually at the hospital the nurse showed me where they keep the footprint supplies and said 'take as many as you want' so i took a bunch and did his newborn hand and footprints several times for his scrapbook. but nothing since then.

ebin is getting into separation anxiety mode now too. (7 months now). i took him to the gym yesterday and got 3 1/2 minutes on the elliptical trainer before they called me. he was totally melting down like he was scared. i'm so glad he's been watched by andrea so long he's happy as a clam with her. he has been such an easy-going baby that this is a new turn

my friend came over yesterday who has the new unexpected pregnancy. she's keeping it and i am sooooo glad. her little guy is only a month older than ebin but he's pulling up and crawling everywhere. it is such a huge difference at this age!


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Dh is running off to the UPS store to fax in application materials for me for a job I'm pretty much perfectly qualified for (and it has to be received in, oh, 20 minutes, and I found the job announcment, oh, 45 minutes ago). Downside is that I'd have an hour commute (each way).

I'll say more stuff later, when I feel my time is more my own...







:


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

kk-wow! What kind of job? Tell us more when you can.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

The UPS Store? I loved working there! Crossing my fingers for ya!


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

: for you KK. I'm already planning a great smilie parade for when you get the job. And it includes lots of hand clapping smilies for certain MMF members.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Sarah'sMama* 







: for you KK. I'm already planning a great smilie parade for when you get the job. And it includes lots of hand clapping smilies for certain MMF members.


















Good luck, KK!

I am having a carptastical night. It's one of those days where I just want to disappear for like, a WEEK and be left the heck alone.







:
But I am about to go to bed so I will talk to you mamas later.


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Hope tomorrow is better, mama.


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## fiddlefern (Nov 9, 2003)

KK- oooooh let us know more when you can about the job. Is it research or teaching? Is it specifically microbial ecology? Also, it would be very cool if you could swing by and see us in the airport,







, but please only come if the fun of it would outweigh the stress and incovenience of it.









Jacq- waiting to read oy about dh's job too. My dumb computer keeps kickin me off the net today, so I haven't checked.

Renae- hopin the craptastical eve has been followed by a peaceful day!

Meesa- way to think on your feet.







Mama to the rescue!

OK, it's taken me an hour to do this check. Some day I'll figure out why my computer is so finicky! Gotta call CPR students now and remind them to show up.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

I aced my chem exam!!! I'm so excited!!! I suck at science- so this is a major accomplishment for me!! WOOOOHOOO!

Here's me being healthy happy scientific earthlovin girl!







:


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Danile! GO YOU!














:
Part of my icky night was cominghome late after a rough childcare night (I watch some kids from a local political group while their parents meet), then being VERY aware that FRIDAY is the busiest & most stressful of our week. Most people bemoan Mondays, I am not fond of Fridays.







:
Lots of running around, taking care of other people's kids, with poor Rowan tagging along not getting enough of his mama's attention.







Sucks.
But oh well, we work how we can, you know?
And we have pretty much no plans this weekend. And I start yoga again tomorrow morning, for the first time in over a year. That'll be nice.

Later, mamas! Have a good day.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

shaping up to be a crazy day. hj not eating after two days of doing very well. not able to pump that well for some reason. stress maybe?







carpity carp carp carp. send all your







: vibes his way.


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Ooh, Heath, sending lots of calm, flowy, eaty vibes your way. C'mon, HJ...
Ferny, I'll send you a PM.

T is sick in bed with a fever. This will be the first day of school he's ever missed, poor guy.

It's a soil conservationist position for the Natural Resources Conservation Service (govt job). It aligns really well with my (academic) background... the only downside is that there'd be a killer commute. If I got it, I think I'd try to negotiate for a compressed workweek and/or some telecommuting. (In general, I've felt pretty crappy about things I've applied to; I feel like my big almost 7 year mama gap is glaring up at them. I wonder what kind of impact it will have on *this* application. And yes, now that things are settling down again, I need to get back at my dissertation.) Anyway, if I got it, I think I'd do it for a year (to get over my mama gap hump) and then look for something closer to home. I don't know if my pessimism, lack of confidence, and all-around negativity is coming through strongly enough.


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

Thanks for all the support regarding the lying thing. It weighed on me all day until I talked to John about it. I'm going to be lazy and copy and paste my response from the other thread.







But the short version of resolution is pretty close to what Elsanne said. It's not about me. It's about DSS and his mom and their issues. I can not and will not ever be able to change that, so let's keep it movin'!









Quote:

My DH, otoh, is from divorced parents. I did speak with him about this and he reminded me that most kids do this. If their parents are split up, the kids is most likely going to try to work both the parents for what they want. And I think he's right, to an extent. I can remember growing up, my friends with divorced parents did stuff like this all the time. It doesn't make it okay, but it makes is waaaaaaay less about ME, and more circumstantial.

So yeah, DH was really great when I talked to him about it. He reminded me that HE appreciates everything I do (he really does and is very good about letting me know all the time ) and that I should let go of expecting any appreciation from my DSS or his mom. DSS, well, he's just a kid and kids don't usually appreciate their parents, birth or step, until much later in life. And as for his exwife, she can not appreciate me because it's just too hard for her. She can't handle caring for her son, and I can and do, and that's difficult for her. I can understand that. And it makes me feel a bit more empathetic towards her.

As for letting mom know she is being manipulated.... well, she already knows she is. She is well aware of DSS's lying (it's well documented in his IEP at school as a major area of concern) and there's nothing to report to her, really. She has actually said she thinks it's "cool to see his brain work" when he is lying, as there was a time in his life (due to medical issues) they did not know what sort of cognitive abilities he would have at all. She takes a certain pride in knowing he is capable of manipulating, because it was once questionable that he would walk, talk, or live any kind of normal life. So basically, she already knows he lies and she is choosing to believe him under certain circumstances. We can not change what she chooses to believe, especially since in this case, she is emotionally invested in believing I am doing a sub-par job. She knows deep down that's not true, but it makes her feel better to believe it on the surface. These are her issues, not mine. And to be honest, I don't want to get involved in that conversation with her.

That day, when DSS got home from school, I very calmly told him that I appreciated his honesty with me earlier about lying about me to his mom. I said I feel very sad and disrespected by him when he does this, and I would never do that to him, because I care about him and would never want people to think poorly of him. I also told him that he is free to talk to his mother however he chooses, there is nothing I can do to control that. But I would hope he would choose differently in the future. He was a little stunned that I was so calm (this is my new tactic ) and I think he was mostly embarrassed. I didn't shame him, but I did let him know how I felt about his actions. I don't know if he got it or not, but I can only assume a little bit sunk in and move forward.
KK, good luck with the job! Sounds right up your ally.

Heather, hugs on the feeding issues. Blech. Can't a sister get a break????


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Oh my goodness... my sleep deprived new mamaness is totally a moron.







I just reread KK's post and realized she meant that she was using the UPS store to fax something... not applying there...









Forgive me KK... Crossing my fingers now for a job that SOUNDS much better since I've had a little sleep now...


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

Danile, great job on the chem exam!

Sherri,







at your clapping hand smilie threat.

Mia does not go to a co-op preschool, and I must say, I'm glad. They don't even allow parents in the classroom. They are pretty strict Montessori and parents are too distracting of the children's work. Fine by me.


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

fingers crossed on the application, KK

and congrats on the great chem test danile! and such a short time after giving birth...you're amazing!


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

:









So much I wanna say, so just not able to do it right now.

HJ,







:

Sherri, your smilie art actually brought tears to my eyes. Thanks!


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

: about the chem exam! I saw your thought about kk applying at the ups store and I have to admit, it made me giggle. kk, why don't you just apply for a position there so that the commute is much shorter?







: I totally gave you credit for new-mama-in-school brain, Danile.

Meg, so glad it came to the resolution it did.

I'm just biding time until viet comes home while amara screams on me. Get. These. Kids. Away!

I am hoping for a couple hours to myself tonight...


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

i forgot to say







: to HJ

i'm hoping for a few hours of sewing time to myself this weekend. i have deadline pressure to get a baby pressie done! arrrgghh. last night was luckily better on the bedtime front. isaac has been sleeping in my bed ever since jasmine came home from the vet. he said he likes to sleep with her and i have her confined to our bedroom to recover. last night i left him up there and this morning he told me 'jasmine won't share the bed with me!!' (read: jasmine was not into a cuddle with a 3yo boy). funny

i love the bat for lashes song what's a girl to do


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

:Happy Birthday Caitlin!!







:


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

Thanks







: I can't believe my first babe is SIX years old today! So far we've had a blast - six girls painting toenails, making bracelets, generally running amok. The guests have gone home and now it's quiet time...


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Happy Birthday Juice!!!!!!!!!


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

And while I do revel in the day, I just want to clarify that it's Caitlyn's birthday, not mine


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Happy Birthday, Caitlyn!









HJ,







:!!

Danile - way to go on the test! You are amazing.

Sarah


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## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

Somehow I dropped my log in and stopped getting updates! Grr...

Here's a brief update on me:
My mom went home on Monday. It was so hard to see her go and I am so thankful that we had the time together that we have had.

Annie is doing well. She has a pukey stomach thing going right now. Frankly, I think we caught it from the MMF crowd. Her CT scan is scheduled for Monday. Until that is over and, pray it's true, we get the positive results, I won't feel relaxed about her health.

Ellie is great. I love this age with her. She is obsessed with bones. And ballet. I am telling her all about careers in sports medicine. We're going to a women's basketball game this afternoon (Stanford vs. Oregon - I am cheering for Oregon).

Meg- I seem to have caught up after you came to a resolution about your DSS. It sounds like you handled the situation with maturity and grace - which I totally give you big credit for. It sounds like an endlessly frustrating situation.

KK- I hope the application is well received!

I dislike this smilie. laughup: I just feel that it is weird to have a disembodied head and hand and then do _that_ with the mouth.

I don't know how to use, but really really like







: and









All right, I am going to clean off my desk now. Sadly, I had so much work piling up that there are files on the shelf outside my office because the administrative staff couldn't fit it on my desk.







:


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

That's 2 for me.







Sorry Juice- I'm still learning all this stuff. I suppose I could find out oy huh? I just never go over there... Happy birthday to Caitlin!!


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Danile, no worries sweetheart. It would appear that it was Jus's birthday but nope...

girls are running amok and I am fried like an egg, like huevos rancheros, and must go play puzzles.

Lisa, Sol is also obsessed with bones, who has them (Reina, our dog), who doesn't (bugs), why mommy's bones "moved" and she has to go to a bone doctor (chiro)...


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Just a note to FF, in case my PM doesn't work... T is running a high fever, and I feel like I'm having the initial symptoms (his started with a sore throat, I've got a sore throat, I slept in his bed last night...). Between wanting to be around to hover over him and not wanting to expose you (and Will), I don't think I should meet up with you tomorrow. I'll give you a call if you don't respond within a few hours. Sorry!


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

D'oh! Sorry Caitlin! I read OY but must ahve just skimmed and saw Juice. Sorry! I'm going to edit my original post! Hope your year is fantastical!!!


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

random question: anyone else dealing with selective listening w/ their may babe? I'm sure this isn't the last of it, but







. ftr, I know she's hearing me because at the same volume, I asked if she wanted to go in the kitchen to get some chocolate and she hopped right up.









kk---sorry that you and T are down w/ fevers and sickies! bummer!

I'm in a grumpy mood so I'll end it there.....


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Heather, ask Juice allllll about this topic. Frustrating!!!!


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

I'm sorry Heather... did you say something?






















:

Sorry, couldn't resist. MAJOR selective listening here. An. Noy. Ing.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

*ignores until someone starts yelling*
Oh um, ahem. YEP. Selective listening like WHOAH. It's SO annoying. Especially when I say "did you even HEAR ME?!?!" And he says, "yeah"








When I've asked him why he acts like he doesn't hear me he doesn't really answer me. Of course.
So anyway, yep.










More later, just checking in. I have to get to bed soon. Taking a 3 1/2 year old to a movie (The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything!







It was great fun) is hard! Hah.


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

Sherri, I have to say your original post made me really happy, because after all, it was MY first birthing day. I'm all sappy and emotional (Cancer woman here) but when I read it, I just felt applauded, and that was really nice







:

And now, for something completely different:

OMG OMG OMG THE SELECTIVE HEARING!! It's maddening! My only saving grace is that Allison is not my first, and I remember *distinctly* when I had Caitlyn to her 3 year well check (albeit at least six months late), and I asked him to check her for an ear infection even though she had no symptoms. He did, but said she was fine, and why was I concerned? I told him she didn't respond when I was talking to her. He almost laughed out loud, and said, "That is very common at this age, but I promise she can hear you." I went home, and did a little experiment - I was talking to her and she was ignoring me, and without changing my tone I just inserted the phrase, "Would you like some ice cream?" and she spun around and said "YES!"

I have a whole file in my brain, it's labeled "Developmentally Appropriate But Highly Irritating."

Allison is killing me right now. She doesn't really *ignore*, she just pulls this fantastic civil disobedience thing. Ask her to do something, she says she doesn't want to. Explain that she'll need to do it anyway, and she just turns and looks at you. Stares blankly into your face, no drama, no antics, no nothing. The other day I decided to stare her down, and I swear, she didn't blink for so long I wondered if she was having a seizure of some kind







: She just stands there and looks at you with the slightest pout. It's both maddening and hilarious at the same time.


----------



## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

selective hearing and EXTREMELY selective responding here, too. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggggggg ggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! but when i resort to asking either/or situations with something that might just be the teensiest bit interesting to do, he magically responds! for example, "do you want to put your shoes on so we can go to Trader Joe's or do you just want to stay home by yourself while Stefan and I go to Trader Joe's?" (he LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVES trader joe's, it's so funny...) response: "no, no, no, i want to go, i want to go, i need to get my shoes, i neeeeeeeeeeed to get my shoes..." runs off to front door area to put on shoes.







:

bill went skiing today. i thought i was being nice giving him a day to himself. ha, not doing THAT again. short person meltdown occurred shortly after 430, bill was unreachable by cell (no coverage up on the mountain...???) and they stayed until the last possible moment of skiing. ummm, no. when i asked you to please consider leaving around 3-330ish because it takes close to 2 hours to get home, which would have put you at home around 530, instead of me finally resorting to calling your friend's cell phone and talking to you while child are screaming in the background and then that phone loses reception, and then you call me back 10 minutes later from still 1.5 hours away and it's 530 and both of them have been FUH-REAK-ING out for an hour already for no particular reason (marek's may have been needing to poop related, however), i'm not happy. i have an afternoon to myself to go to a friend's mama blessing tomorrow, but dang that's not enough. i'm making a massage appointment for next weekend at the coast.

and now for my chocolate cake that i'm NOT sharing.

~claudia


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

our developmental trick du jour is picking up on phrases and putting them into use.

'will you please come downstairs and put your pirates away?'
'i can't; i'm too busy'








:

i'm dying to go skiing but not dying enough to pay for it (+ babysitting). i'm secretly glad doug has not tried to go without me







:

ok. gee all is quiet and i have some time alone and it is 11:30 and i should just go to bed!

they're talking about pulque on tv right now


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

pulque sounds good right about now. par-tay at our house replete with cooing not eating babe.

claudia...I had one of those kinda moments earlier. *hugs* hope tomorrow afternoon replenishes you a bit.

come on boy







:







:







:







: so I can sleep already!


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Was HJ up partyin' in the wee hours? Wait! Now I know why they're called "wee" hours, because "wee" people cause you to be awake during them.

TC your afternoon sounds awful. I sure hope you get a break today.

Viet and I are trying a new morning technique here, which so far, works for me! Amara wakes at the pre-dawn, wanting to nurse nurse nurse, about 2x each breast, but still can't get back to sleep, waking Sol up, and then all 3 of us are grouchy because everyone needs to have slept more, then I am launched into a day of small people's needs without so much as a cup of coffee, until I get it amidst cries and more needs...
So today at the 3rd of 4 breast-switches,

*pause to hang out with Sol while she wakes up*

As I was saying, I took Amara up to Daddy at the request for "otro" (her first time using the word!) and then went about my coffee business. Sol woke up shortly thereafter, and I can hear Amara playing upstairs, so it didn't work extremely well to get both girls to sleep more. But, I had about 20 min to myself, which is important.

The saddest thing is though, that I dropped my brand new french press from christmas, it's all of about 2 weeks old, and it's history. wah! Back to cone filter drip method, cup by stinkin cup.

So now Sol and I are snuggling on the couch while I attend to my mmf..


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 
The saddest thing is though, that I dropped my brand new french press from christmas, it's all of about 2 weeks old, and it's history. wah! Back to cone filter drip method, cup by stinkin cup.

This is truly sad. Ug. (I could never have one of those myself, because I'm so breaky.)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *heatherfeather* 
come on boy







:







:







:







: so I can sleep already!









:Eat, HJ, eat!!!!







: Sorry you're going through this yet again, Heather.

TC, I think that the worst period in the day is from ~4-6 (give or take an hour or so), so I feel for you wrt Bill's outing.

Selective deafness has been going on here for quite a while. Yes, if you whisper, "Raisin?" they hear you, but otherwise, no. It sounds like Z and Allison do the same things. I'm a little scared, because while he generally behaves far better than T did at 3, he's *much* harder to disclipline (ie, bend to my will) than T was. I think I've shared that I've really trained them on "I'm asking you nicely" (code for, "Dude, I'm about to YELL because I've asked you too many times!").

Have to say, Meg, I was majorly impressed with the way you handled things.

Nothing exciting here. The advice line nurse says T most likely has strep. He's had a fever over 103 (with higher spikes) for 3 days, sore throat. Yeah, I guess strep is probably it. I have a sore throat, no fever (thank goodness). I'm going to just keep pushing the liquids and probably take him to the dr. tomorrow morning. I want to keep him *away* from the little ones... I don't want this to go through our family like the last thing. (Poor kid wet his bed last night when he was incoherent from fever and took off his pull-up then didn't make it out of the bed... I went to check on him and found him naked, shivering under a wet blanket... nice.) Dh is all freaked out about the (fruit) sugar in apple juice and giving that to him when he's sick...







I've tried pointing out that he needs to stay hydrated in whatever form we can manage it, but dh is a bit of a nut. (This is part of the reason I'm ditching Ferny... I don't trust dh to take care of him properly in my absence.)


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Wee hours for sure. So he eventually gave in to sleep w/o eating much.









I broke my friend's french press once. Wish they were more durable! New morning routine sounds good!

kk--poor T! I'm with you on not trusting my other half's judgement especially after the girls came back from the park yesterday frozen w/ only light jackets, no hats and one pair of mittens between them!









Glad to know C is developmentally on target in the listening dept!


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

Juice~your post seriously made me lol. I have to make sure Saige is looking me in the eye when I talk to her if it's anything important.

She has just started telling me "not right now" when I ask her to do something.

KK~We've been dealing with a sore throat/fever thing around here too. Now K has a cough I'm worried about-He was premature and spent a week in the nicu.
I hope your lo feels better!


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

I am about to crack a new book that a friend loaned to me: Scream Free Parenting: the Revolutionary Approach to Raising Your Kids by Keeping Your Cool. She said it was a quick read and really resonated with her. The premise is (stealing from the back cover), "Our biggest enemy is our own emotional reactivity". Ya think??????









Els,







on the broken french press sitch. That sucks.









Nightweaning update: We're all good! For a couple of weeks, he was down to one waking around 2 AM, DH would go in and he would just go right back to sleep, easy peasy. For the past 2-3 nights, no wakings at all, until about 5:30 or so, at which point I go in and pray he will nurse/sleep a little longer. So as long as I go to bed at a decent hour, I am getting SLEEP. And not n a twin bed with a toddler - in my own bed!









OW! Jett just bit me.







: Gotta go.


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

I posted a little something oy last night about a friend who is very sick and in need of lots of







and







.

HF, huge, massive hugs to you, girl.

KK, hope T feels better soon and that no one else gets it.

I agree with Meesa - eye contact is key!

TC, sorry you had a crappy evening. Sometimes I feel glad that I am so used to flying solo for dinner/bed time. If I were used to having help, it would make the alone times much worse. But I am pretty used to doing it all myself. If they are both melting down, obviously that's a lot worse than just handling a regular day. Anyway, book that massage and take some time this afternoon, even if it's just out for a coffee and browsing a book store.

I feel like Old Mother Hubbard. My cupboards are bare. I have already arranged for my mom to watch Jett while Mia is in school so I can do a Monster Shopping Trip this week. We are so out of everything. Serious restocking of pantry is in order.

OH! OOOOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!!!! Did I ever mention to you all that John got his promotion????? Oh yes, my man is now the Director of Quality for Rhapsody online music service. He is still negotiating his raise, but no matter the specifics of that, there will be more money coming in to our house as of the 15th! YAY!


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

meg: rhapsody? cool. bill likes that software/web service. he even worked on a project with them up in seattle with intel. and if john ever wants some security/testing feedback on it, bill said he's happy to give some.


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

mornin!

i stayed up way too late dinking on the computer. and then ebin woke 4zillion times. doug got him at 8 but i only stayed in bed until 8:30 because i could hear him fussing. he's yawning and rubbing his eyes







gee why so tired????

we have both voted on mcD's drivethorugh because we have no REAL coffee in the house







i think babe must go down for his nap first.


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

babe did not go down yet but i'm hoping he will soon so i can run a couple of SOLO errands

just wanted to add that i hope T feels better. strep is SO painful.

and that is such a bummer about the french press









it is all football all the time around here







we need to remove the door we put in and cut into the header to install it correctly. and then that might not even be enough and if we have to expand width-ways it will be a major pita. and it looks like it really isn't going to happen today. procrastination station. i really wanted to get it installed and locked before we leave town. i thought we were going to board our dog though and now our friend is going to take care of him (and the wounded cat). so at least that is better on the safety front.

meg - that is awesome about john's promotion!! i'm reading the positive discipline book you recommended and it is great. i just realized it is the first and only 'parenting' book i've ever read







: that's pretty lame considering i've been a parent for 3 1/2 years now!! gah. of course i've read plenty of developmental stuff and dr. sears has a bit of discipline in his books.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Miss Juice* 

I have a whole file in my brain, it's labeled "Developmentally Appropriate But Highly Irritating."

Allison is killing me right now. She doesn't really *ignore*, she just pulls this fantastic civil disobedience thing. Ask her to do something, she says she doesn't want to. Explain that she'll need to do it anyway, and she just turns and looks at you. Stares blankly into your face, no drama, no antics, no nothing. The other day I decided to stare her down, and I swear, she didn't blink for so long I wondered if she was having a seizure of some kind







: She just stands there and looks at you with the slightest pout. It's both maddening and hilarious at the same time.


Oh Juice... thank you so much for the laugh. I know I shouldn't, but it was so funny!







If it saves me any face for laughing at your misfortune... we are very much going through the same *so not listening when i don't want to* phase. Very selective listening.. and selective focusing. Does anyone's may baby have issues staying at the table for an entire meal? I don't mean until the adults are done.. just until THEY are done... *sigh*

Els- Sorry about your french press.









KK- Sending some serious healing vibes for your fam!

TC- I would be LIVID. But then... in those moments DH always likes to remind me that he does many more supportive and active parenting things than most of the people we know. I then remind him that I do many more healthy parenting things for our children than most of the people in our county. (We live in a VERY mainstream area... I'm one of the hippie kind of chicks...







) Definitely take some time to yourself. Breathe and relax. You deserve it.

And where is Lisa? I haven't heard from her in while.

Meg- Congrats to your DH!

That's all my babybrain can remember... LOve to you all and sorry if I forgot to respond!


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Also wondering where our dear Emmalola has gone to! Hope life w/ the legumes is going okay and that you'll let us know if it's not. Thinking of you!


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

yes yes! EL too! And HJ- i forgot eating vibes to your lo!


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

alright.. since i skipped the previous chiro discussion... do any of u ladies have any experience with reflux/chiro care being helpful? Jasmine is puking and cring so much.. and since her weight isn't back up we're feeling pretty confident it is reflux since Dom has it and I have it and it runs in my family...


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

I do think chiro helps reflux, but my take on it is that for certain kinds of reflux it needs to be in concert with allopathic medicine. HJ has been adjusted every two weeks so far and it seems to counteract a lot of the terrible arching he does. Arching/extension= trouble feeding ....ex. try lifting your chin and swallowing...and then tuck your chin and swallow...huge difference. He always has some tight spots in his neck/mid-thoracic and is always a much happier babe after an adjustment. That said, we also do meds because he was in pain from the spitting up and that impacted his eating and consequently my supply. Sorry she's not such a happy camper!


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Danile, I'm sorry to hear about pukey, unhappy Jasmine! I sure hope you are able to get her some help soon. That is so miserable for everyone!

Cute pic with your son in the boppy, btw, on your blog.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

is there anything nutritionally that i could do? like would me taking in dairy be aggravating it?


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Danile, I'm so sorry you have to watch her feel so miserable.







Some of the other MMF are far more knowledgeable about reflux than I so I will defer to them. Also, have you checked out kellymom? I do know dairy can be quite offensive to some babies, so cutting it out of your diet may help. I just wanted to offer my support.

Juice, I forgot to tell you how much your post about your 3yo had me in stitches!

KK, I hope you and T are feeling better. LEt us know how the doc's appt goes.

I'm stoked for john's promo! That's incredible and so well deserved! Way to go!









els, sorry to hear bout the french press. I have no idea what one is but it's heartbreaking nonetheless. I'm getting hooked on coffee. I'm all about the flavored creamers....







:

TC, sorry to hear about your no good very bad day.







Hope you got to recharge a bit yesterday.

Selective hearing here at my house as well.









Got to run to stock up o some essentials at target. love their method cleaning products. have a good week everymama!


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

I wish I could just "run to target". Our closest target is 30 min away. Boo hoo.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

I don't have tons of time (whee, going to work in the SNOW!














, but I wanted to share an article I read in Brain, Child Magazine with you all...can I do that? Well, whatever. Here it is.
The most telling quote is something I will have post over yonder.

But anyway, I hope you enjoy it. I thought you might. I love Brain, Child.









I have to go, but I hope you all have a great day!










ETA: The thing that made me think of this article was the talk of favorite/least favorite smilies we've touched upon. One of my least favorite smilies is this one:








Oh wait, these pi$$ me off too, when used in a "chiding the mama" context:














:
Grr.

But this one, which I think is new since I returned, is SO RAD:







:
Heeheehee.
Now that is all! I gotta go to work! MMF!


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

After 2 hrs at the dr's office (wait, appt, wait at pharmacy, etc), we're home. T *does* have strep. "Good eye, Mom!" the dr. said (uh, how hard is it to think, "Hmm, should I schedule an appt, since he's been really sick for going on 4 days?"). It's more of a good nose (IMO, strep has a certain smell...). I have to shoo him back to bed. When his fever dips below 101, he wants to play, but I'd rather he pace himself a bit more (he's more of the crash and burn model). I feel a little guilty... I definitely do motrin or tylenol when they seem to need it (high fever, really achy, bad teething, etc), but I've been pacing him with it, because I don't think it does him any good to feel "too good" and to be up racing around (like yesterday). That generally stops within ~45 min (of breathing on his sibs), and then he falls apart in tears and is back in bed. Okay, enough whining on my part.

Ug, way too much reflux in our little group! So sorry, Danile. It just seems like such a nasty thing for a tiny person to go through.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

great article- and i agree with the icons thing... but to be honest- i really NEED mothering... i don't have very many people who make similar parenting choices as me in my community... i rely on this as my sounding board and advice board. So while I can hang out with mamas here all the time.. it gets kind of lonely being the hippie girl all the time. and can i just say you mamas (MMF!) y absolute favorite group to chat with about anything, anytime.







Sorry- couldn't resist the smiley.


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Renae, that is an interesting article. Thanks for the link.

KK, so sorry about the strep.

Meg, thinking about your friend. Yay for your DH!

My first day of primary care clinical today. So far, so good. Certainly can't complain about the 2-hour lunch today during which I can come home!

Sarah


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Hi everybuggy. Renae, that was indeed an interesting article. Gives me pause and makes me appreciate those annoying members of my real life village.

I seldom venture forth and definitely never into the debate rooms of mdc, because it just wastes time and creates negative energy. As is, I spend WAY too much time online.


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

I will agree with Danile that there is a degree to which I need Mothering/MDC. Even though I live in what most people regard as a crunchy place, most of my friends IRL are not as crunchy as I am (or as crunchy as the MMs). I tried, but I just did not find my place in the "normal" places you'd find crunchy moms around here (our LLL chapter is nice but *very* bland, very infant-oriented; our API group I found extremely dogmatic, and I have a hard time "taking parenting advice" from people who are so much younger than me/whose kids are so much younger than mine; very little crunch at church or even at our co-op preschool). What's good about y'all (and my real life friends) is feeling accepted for *whereever* I am on the crunch-o-meter. I'm just not a person who like argument, though. I think there's a certain element, though, that is too quick to jump into that mode, and I don't think it necessary wins a lot of friends. I'm much more likely to learn something from one of you guys about something I don't necessarily partake in than I am from a dogmatic stranger.

(Danile, I think it's kind of funny that you refer to yourself as a hippie. I am still surprised when people refer to me that way, even though I guess I fit the mold...)

MCSB, aren't you going to miss some babies on your long lunch?








: (Seriously, though, I hope the semester goes well, you enjoy your lunch "hour", and that you catch a lot of babies.)


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

OMG, can it be true?! I have a moment to type this out while BOTH kids are occupied! (hey man, not used to the "two children" thing!







)
PLEASE don't think I am bashing MDC...much.







I agree, I NEED this place too...I am definitely in the minority here "IRL" and having this sounding board and support (even if I only come to the MMF thread!







) is invaluable to me. MDC was the first parenting forum I EVER visited, and it will be a constant in my life for many years to come.









But I thought it was an interesting article and addressed many thoughts I've had about online forums.

Okay, there's my three seconds to have both hands free. I gotta go.










Oh, and most of the smilies rock my world.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

: <--Is this Sarah studying?








: was my day. uncle!


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Ha! I wish my glasses were that cool.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Ha! That smilie is SO SarahBee.


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## nuggetsmom (Aug 7, 2002)

Well, I had to come over here to check out the new smilies.







:







:







:
WOW.
And HF found me elsewhere in cyberspace. I don't know how, but it was cool to get a comment on my blog from someone I know.
Oh, and Elsanne... Does this mean you can have no coffee???? I am so so sorry. I would just expire. I love coffee. So I hope you can get coffee elsewhere. French press coffee is so good too. Mmmm I wish I could have some right now.
I have been super busy and feeling very out of sorts with other mothers IRL. I know you guys would make me feel better, but with all the other stuff going on I didn't feel like dumpng here.
My most exciting project... Teaching Nature drawing in first grade. It is so cool! The kids are so awesome, but N is feeling a serious need to be special right now. Like she is upset if I am not paying 100% attention to her and her alone. So I am having to fit that into the rest of my day but of course I have my sidekick J with me all the time. J thinks she is in first grade BTW.
:LOL
Here is my 2 minute update.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Jacqueline! I am SOOO glad to see you around here! Please do keep on posting here, no need for attending to every single personal post, so as not to overwhelm you and drive you back to from whence you came. Just checked out your blog. You are busy!! Great sketches.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Man, I'm tired. :yawning:
(I totally guessed at that smiley and I was right! Haha)
Jacqueline!







Yeah, actually, Els helped me get over my worries about not being as "caught up" here as I'd like, and to just keep typing away!









Okay, so speaking of, I'll update more later, I am needed for the completion of a Very Hungry Caterpillar puzzle.









Oh, and let me reiterate that I wasn't dissing MDC really when I posted that article, I just thought it was interesting. For me, finding this online community when I was pregnant and a new mother was INVALUABLE to me. Even the times I didn't exactly get what I needed here, it helped me prove to myself that I carried more strength than I was giving myself credit for. If that makes any sense.

Don't mind me, I'm being insecure. Again.
















you all!


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

renae--totally get what you're saying about the article!

I need to call in sick today and curl up in bed, watch a dvd and complain about my annoying cold. Anyone have the #??


----------



## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *heatherfeather* 
I need to call in sick today and curl up in bed, watch a dvd and complain about my annoying cold. Anyone have the #??

867-5309







Hope you feel better soon Heather!!!

Thanks to all for the positive thoughts about my friend Shannon. She's been moved out of the ICU and has become more conscious and less confused ("holy f&$#, what happened???"). The antibiotics seem to be working, but there is still some concern about the plaque shattering again. BUT, her kidney is functioning better, so they are now saying if things continue like they are, they will NOT have to remove it. Not out of the woods yet, but things are looking up.

Gotta finish cleaning out the fridge. My mom is coming to stay with Jett while Mia is in school so I can do my huge grocery shopping. Is it totally pathetic that I am counting this is "me time"?


----------



## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

It's 1-800-HONEY?

Oh, look at that... not enough digits. Guess it won't work after all.


----------



## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

megan: that is "me" time, but "not really me" time for us, too. but marek loves grocery shopping with me. and that boy loves him some costco, too. just have to avoid the toy and movie and book aisles. oh, and i use the "that's not on our list today" line a lot nowadays.

also, so glad to hear about shannon's positive progress.

kk: hope those sickies clear up soon.

fernie: hope you're having fun in cali!!!

jstar: you, too!

sarah-b: your glasses are too that cool.







:

stefan has just removed his pants. is he trying to tell me something?

~claudia


----------



## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

Today I am shaking my fist at sky yelling: "LEAVE HEATHER ALONE!!!" I hope you feel better soon, feather.

Yesterday was the CT scan and we HOPE to hear the results today. It was actually a pretty easy and straightforward process. The radiology nurse was awesome. She made us feel really relaxed and that totally helped Annabel to relax - well, that and the sedative. She took it fine, conked out, and slept through the scan. She was pretty incapable of coordinated motion for most of the day and was super tired and cranky, but in general was a trooper.
I'll update here when we get the results.

On top of that, we (Annabel and I) have had the stomach flu. She was sick on Friday and I have been sick since Sunday morning. She got over it in 24 hours - why can't I be so lucky? I also think that it has brought back my labyrinthitis which causes vertigo. Totally not a nice feeling. Wah&#8230;I am sorry to list out all my troubles and bore you all to tears.

Meg - I am glad to hear the positive update on your friend.








to those visiting California!

I just read the article and I agree with it most wholeheartedly actually. My problem is that I have not developed a local network like the author has so I have not come to the same solutions. I just can't seem to manage the whole work-out-of-the-house while still mostly being an AP parent thing with IRL people. It is an odd issue that I suspect will go away once the girls are older/in school at which point I will be going to nursing school so then it will be whole 'nother ball of wax.

I am so happy to see Nuggets and Renae back in MMFtown.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mamameg* 
867-5309

















:







:







:


----------



## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Well Howdy Lisa! I hope Annabell is doing fine and the results come back with some positive news for you!

And I'm sure that Sarah's glasses are super cool.

And still sending







:







: to HJ for Heath.


----------



## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

NORMAL. The CT scan results are that she is normal! I am so relieved.

Hi danile







Thanks for thinking of me. I have been wondering, btw, is is Yazz-Meen or Jazz-min? In my head it is Jazz-min but it occurred to me I could be saying it all wrong. I hope she feels more confortable soon. Do you have a Moby wrap type sling to minimize the reflux from laying down?


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Whew! That's super news Lisa! I'm so glad it's over and the news is good. What a relief it is for your family, for sure! I hope you kick the flu's butt and feel better soon.

Heather, hope you're feeling better soon, too. It's so hard to meet everyone else's needs and not be able to meet your own.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Jazzmin.

NAK. No moby... babyhawk mt


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

and major congrats on the results!!!!!


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

i'm leaving tomorrow and feel







: with work and packing

awesome results, lisa


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

YAAAAY LISA!!!!! That is truly wonderful. *phew*

I really love your words of support to others (of which I have been happily the recipient), they are so much more meaningful somehow than the average. Like, shaking the fist at the sky, and saying "leave heather alone"....genius. I wish I was so erudite. Does using that word give me points?

It's like you really take in the story, think on it, and come out with a thoughtful response.

Heather, on a daily basis you are doing an amazing thing with those three. I send you so much coping energy.

Meg: shopping alone is indeed wonderful. Like Marek, Sol is a champ with shopping, so I actually enjoy taking her. That kid, though, Amara? Leave her home! Unless she has something to eat constantly in her hand.

Meesa, it is daunting to come into a group that is chattering away. Just keep posting, 'cause otherwise you'll go away! I know, because I've tried "moving in" with an established thread and while they accepted me, I just never felt truly interested in all their myriad stories (there's no room for any more after mmf and a group of julymamas I hang with too)...and unable to respond, I bagged.


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

i read the article. i feel pretty split on it. i tried to make a big effort to make some 'new mom' friends when i had isaac by doing a playgroup. and it was fun but it is totally over now. no deep, lasting friendships really. and my internet mama friends have become my REAL friends thankfully (claudia, beth and sarah)







so i feel like YAY that is a real bonus to make some real connections through the computer with you ladies who i truly enjoy hanging out with. but as i've participated (sort of here and there) in the bigger portland gatherings i totally feel like i'm on the sidelines and it is hard to "fit in" and connect (which she captures pretty well in her article. that kind of feeling).

and then i have friends who don't have kids and now it is hard for me to even maintain those friendships because i can't go out and hang out at the drop of a hat. and that has been bumming me out lately.

anyhoot. the sorta homeless 19 year old had her baby this morning. and i kept telling C to tell her i have a carseat and clothes and blah blah. she called her from the hospital this morning and said i'm having a baby in an hour or so and i need a carseat! so i sent the seat and a big bag of newborn clothes and dr sears baby book and a note that said i have dipes and a swing etc. apparently she was stoked on the bag and had NO CLOTHES yet for baby boy. so i am feeling happy. she needs a bed of some sort if any of you pdx mamas know of one up for grabs. any type of bed...playard, cosleeper, basket. she can obviously cosleep for free though


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Somehow I missed the day's worth of threads. And damn if the call-in sick hotline is closed for the day.







I will however be calling 1800honey and ordering some for my iTeaPod this evening.

The girls' PT was kind enough to take a look at HJ today and gave me some good feedback and will take another peek next month to make sure he's staying on track. That was the good part re: babe --- a little while ago I hung up on the nurse from the GI's office. Yup. More on the blog for you cool kids who read there. or oy. or something .... I'm just







: at the "advice" I was given.

C was such a cutie today. Naps coincided nicely and we finally got some one on one time and worked on her OT stuff....lacing cards, cutting, beads, etc. Also taught her how to use the microwave and she thought she was supah cool 'cooking' her own lunch. Vegan nun approved morningstar farms mini corn dogs at that!









okay....off to vent freely elsewhere....

lisa---yay!!! for a normal CT!!! what a relief!


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

yay Lisa for normal CT scan!

heath: commented on the blog. good grief, indeed.

i think some of bill's electronics toys that he has left on the floor here in the office are going to die a slow, toddle induced banging death...

and where the eff is my frickin' car phone charger? my cr4p phone whose buttons are not working well anymore is losing charge in less than a day. i need a new phone. i'm trying to justify if i actually neeeeeeeed an iphone or if i should just get another regular ol' cell phone.

destructo children on the move... gotta go...

~c


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Meg, somehow I missed that about your hubby's promotion, and your hurting friend. *Insert appropriate and heartfelt comments about both here*

TC...hope you find that car charger soon. Get a new phone. Get an iphone if you want one.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

You know, I JUST noticed the mood thing like, yesterday.







I like it.
See, I LIKE smilies! Like this one:







: That is SO totally adorable.

Anyway, yeah, Elsanne, I think it is so interesting that you mentioned the lovely Lisa's postings as being so special to you, because whenever YOU post (and this is not to diminish anyone ELSE'S posting, because you're all rad) I am hanging on to every word. For some reason, I want you to like, be my guru or something!







Heehee.

So yeah! I just keep posting till someone tells me to shut up!







And Meesa, yeah, jump on in! I have had the experiences Els has mentioned, it's hard for me to keep up, and that was why I took a break for a while, among other things.

I don't have a lot to say at the moment; I came on the computer to print out our LLL's sign-in sheet for tomorrow's meeting. Yep, we still go, even though Rowan weaned in May. I think I can still offer some sort of input, and these mamas, even though I only see most of them like once a month, are so entwined in my life now (like a certain MMF group here!







) that I can't imagine NOT going. And they are changing their meeting day/time so we ARE going to have to stop going as of next month.







But I am still among the group of women, including leaders, that plans each meeting so I will still go to the meeting-before-the-meeting, so that makes me feel good. And I am still in charge of the sign-in-sheet!







So tomorrow is the last meeting for Rowan and I. Kinda sad...

I think I should take a look at that book Megan mentioned...*sigh* I kinda feel at a loss as to how to deal with so much of Rowan's behavior lately. Apparently he was one crazy kiddo at the music class DH takes him to every Tuesday. Throwing the instruments, running around, leaving the room without DH...he had to be taken out of the room a couple of times, I guess.







And I know I raise my voice way too much, and I don't want to be that type of mama.







:
Part of it, I know, is stir-craziness because we've been in the house a lot lately; I wasn't feeling well this morning so we didn't go out. Yesterday it was super-yucky out and we only went to the house I nanny at in the afternoon.
So anyway, yeah, I need some ideas on how to talk to him in a way that he will listen...and not freak out because I'm telling him something he doesn't want to hear!









Alrighty, I am off, I had a rough evening, I had my yearly physical and um, the gyno part of that seriously messes me up (past trauma, all that) and I am just TIRED. I may head to bed early. Yup.

Have a good night, mamas! I may not be online much tomorrow, what with the LLL and work all day.
Much love to you all though!


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Renee, that makes me feel REALLY GOOD!!! Thanks for the sweetness that is you. And the adulation, thanks for that too *ego beams*.

I have been wifeless for two days now, she's ill, poor dear. And you should SEE THIS HOUSE. Nothing like appreciating the wife when she's not around! Heavens. Oh shit, reminds me that there are towels in the washer from Sol's pukefest two days ago.
I worked all the live long day today and when I got home, truly it was as if a hurricane had taken every toy, shaken it out, and thrown it far from it's place. Any pieces to it scattered like seeds. Almost funny. Almost.

Renae, about Rowan's behavior: it is my policy to not comment on other kids' behavior much because indeed humans are so very different from one another and I cannot say, oh it's because of x, but I will say that when Sol sees a lot of TV she is a little brat. Something about it really does something to her brain and turns her into mutant child. I threaten her with no longer ever seeing tv because look what it does to her, I say, while she's whining and stomping her feet. Just look. We don't have tv here but for example, whenever we go anywhere else.


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## Jacqueline (Jun 11, 2003)

hey all,
i'm not staying too caught up here lately. We're leaving tomorrow morning for Phoenix! So, lots of stuff to do. Big ol' family gathering at my brother's. It should be fun and I'll have computer access at our hotel, so I also hope to get a little caught up with y'all.

Just wanted to say Hi to my great MM!

Renae-I haven't read all the posts today, but I also read Brain, Child and was wondering what y'all would think of that exact article, so I'm glad you posted it. Great magazine.

okay, gotta fix samwiches for the long drive!!!! Wish me luck.


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## nuggetsmom (Aug 7, 2002)

I love Brain Child. I have read it since N was born.


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Oh, Lisa, what amazingly wonderful news! I am so happy for you all! So what is the next step? Do they have any other ideas, or is it all just a moot point now? I am so happy for you guys, though, that that stressor is over.

jstar - hmmm, sorry, I don't have a bed of any type. Where did she deliver? I know Providence has a gr-r-r-r-eat social work department and often people I saw in clinic got huge bags full of baby gear (mostly high-quality, second-hand, donated stuff) and diapers, etc. Good luck with packing!

Hello, Jaqueline and nugget!









Brain, Child was started by a friend of my step-MIL. She got me a subscription my first year of mamahood but it lapsed. It is generally pretty good; I agree.

DH and I finally watched Knocked Up last night. I felt like I had to see it since it spoofs the kind of work I will be doing...holy crap, mostly hilarious, but some crazy-bizarre parts. The gyno scenes were pretty funneh, though, especially from my student perspective.

Must go to sleep - not enough of that in the past 4 days, and gotta get up and get Lily's hair cut. Wheee.

S.


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

breather time from the whirlwind of packing. phew

i thought knocked up was pretty funny














: and that girl delivered at adventist. i guess she'll be going to stay with her boyfriend's mom who is apparently a totally normal woman. so that is nice. i swear i shouldn't be so worried about this whole thing but it kind of boggles my mind. not in a good way

man it is COLD outside tonight







:

i don't know anything about iphones. as in i wouldn't know if i was looking at one or not. but if everyone is raving about them they must be cool







i need a new phone too. my charger is only half-working

i got waaay too little sleep last night and i should head to bed. but doug put a movie on which is kind of sucking me in. last night ebin had a party until midnight and then isaac woke up at 5:30 and wanted in my bed. then at 6:30 he wanted me to go in his bed with him. then he came back in my bed. then the alarm went off. you get the (sleepless) picture.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Here comes an all about me post.

Finished my history essay. Finished two chem exams. Finished anthro work. It was so hard this week playing catch up after all the boys were sick and I had to play doctor to everyone even in their usual sleeping hours (re: my study hours). But I'm just about done. ONe chem paper tomorrow and I'm caught up. Crazy crazy crazy. Next quarter I'm thinking I'm switchin to 3/4 time. That way I know FOR SURE I can handle my grades and kids. Two classes is easy... three is a constant struggle to maintain my gpa. At least with three kids it is.







:

My in laws came to visit tonight.. it was the first time my FIL has seen Jasmine. He bought her a bouncy seat (which she loves- and for the 5 minutes of freedom to scarf some food down, I in turn love). Then he spoiled her with clothes and a special swaddling blanket. THANK YOU FIL! That girl will not sleep at night unless swaddled. And can I admit I cannot swaddle to save my life? TJ has to do it everytime. BTW...

TJ leaves for 3 days tomorrow on a business trip. I don't know what I'm going to do. I feel like I will lose it while he's gone. I'm embaressed to admit how intimidated I am to deal with three kids by myself when other people do it all the time.







:

Sipping some yummy organic blueberry sparkling cider in a cheap flute and pretending I'm in the carribean with my toes in the sand and no homework.. no worries.. no stress...

*sigh*

Okay... back to reality.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Danile, your post makes me absolutely dizzy. I am amazed you are able to even tread water. You amaze me. I would be scared poopless about being home alone with 3, I remember the sensation with home alone with Amara (#2) as newborn...three, and needing to also do classwork...heavens to mercutroid. You do it with grace, lady. Coolness about the swaddling blankie, I swaddled Amara when she was first born for quite a while. So cute to have this packet-of-babe.

It's my 6 am morning post! I am loving this "give can't-sleep girl to daddy and get up and have my own time" . This is in lieu of meditating, which I should do, but would prefer to gawk at the computer screen instead.

Jstar, I feel like I missed something, packing for what? I just scrolled back through your most recent posts and I see you are leaving today. Where are you going? And yeah, one time I had traffic school and I was amazed at how much I learned in, and enjoyed, the obligatory class. The part that stayed with me most was how to set your rearview mirrors. Sorry to hear that Ebin's nighttimes are kind of sucking, as you may recall from Isaac's babyhood, phases come and go pretty quickly, so thistooshallpass...

I really like the idea of Brain, Child and need to check it out more thoroughly.

Jacquie have fun in Phoenix! It is so nice and warm there this time of year compared to where you live. Let us know how the drive goes, I'm sending you good energy for it.

I'm taking bellydance classes from a Tribal Elder woman, and REALLY enjoying being a student. She is a 66 y.o. woman who danced with Bal Anat in the 70s in the Bay Area (for us tribal gals, that is cause to bow and scrape--Bal Anat gave birth to the style of bellydance that is Tribal). She has long, grey hair that is thinning, many many wrinkles, can be crotchety, is an excellent musician and sublime dancer. She is a crone. I love her! She's visiting here in San Miguel for a couple months.

The owner of the house I manage is here in town. We had agreed that my salary ended as of Dec 07 and happily, when I put in my request for Last Paycheck (ack) he said we would talk when he got down here, and to continue working for him for the moment. I go to see the wizard, then, later today.


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

Claudia~get an iphone!

Danile~I would be nervous too. Even if he doesn't help out much, just knowing that dh is around helps me feel better. I'm sure you'll do great though.

Elsanne~I'm so jealous! I took bellydancing lessons for about a year before the kids came along. I miss it. Saige found one of my hip scarves the other day and I showed her how to put it on and shimmy.


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

and here's an "I'm totally overwhelmed because I haven't posted in too many pages" post









Lisa, OH THANK HEAVENS!! I can only imagine your relief. I am so, so glad for you and your family. It sounds like A did really well with it all, too.

Danile, it's a big thing but don't sweat it (ha, easy to say from my side of the screen, rigt?) Remember that the only things you *have* to do are feed the kids and keep them mostly clothed (depending on how warm your house is). Absolutely everything else can wait if need be. It's overwhelming and intimidating, but I think you'll be surprised how you just rise to it - and if things get crazy just come right on over here and fetch yourself a hug and some understanding







: I've also been surprised, when faced with three kids and solo bedtime (or bathtime or dinnertime), how well they respond when I explain that things are a little different today and "mama needs extra help". If it's at all possible, make sure you have everything you need (food etc) on hand before he leaves, so you leaving with all three kids is totally optional.

Elsanne, that is how my house looks every. single. day. With a lot of effort, we manage to keep the common areas pretty safe to walk through







And here's to you and your morning goddesshood!! My goal right now is to be up at 6am on weekdays so I can meditate for 20 minutes or so before the morning melee - so far I'm batting about 50% on the 6am thing, and zero on the meditation but 100 on the quiet coffee internet time. Hopefully one the wakeup routine is established (which would be easier if Ethan wasn't nursing all night long) I'll get the meditation thing happening. Baby steps, man. Baby steps.

Big







for Heath and continued







: :vibes: to HJ! And I can never get the sick hotline to work, I usually just call my MIL and ask, "Excuse me, is this the complaint department?" And she humors me and I maintain my remaining shred of sanity.

Renae, remember that you are an *awesome* mama







:

And SOMEONE needs to get an iphone so I can hear in person how cool it is.


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

Warning: Pre Coffee Post. Anything could happen.

LISA! Soooooooo glad to hear the results were normal. So does that mean any and all issues are ruled out? Is there a next step or did this alleviate concern altogether.









Els.... heavens to mercutroid...









And Danile, I love how you just come in here and casually mention all this school work, caring for sick kids, just had a baby, FIL visiting, the list goes on.... and you seem cool as a cucumber. And don't feel bad about feeling any kind of way about being on your own with three kids. No matter how used to it some of us are (







), it's never easy.

Meesa, good job on the jumping in the thread! But you gotta throw us some bones about yourself, girl. What are YOU doing today?









TC, the iphones are slick, but overpriced, IMO. And John goes on and on about how their security sux and they are easily hackable. Buuuuuuuut..... he's a little paranoid about that kind of thing, and I'm always like, "WHO would want to hack into YOUR phone?"







: But I guess people don't need much reason these days, so I suppose it's a valid point. Something to consider. Not sure it outweighs the cool factor, tho.

Jess, where are you going? I missed that, too. So sweet of you to pass all that stuff on to New Homeless Mom. It is so hard to comprehend how people can live like that. Some people are a product of really bad circumstances, but when I lived in San Francisco, I used to meet young homeless people (I lived right on Haight St for a while and always lived in that district for the 10 yrs I was there) all the time who were more like drifters than anything else. Too much rebel rebel in them to commit to anything or even try to settle down. Glad to hear your quasi-friend is at least somewhere warm and under the care of someone normalish.

John is going to Seattle for the day today, but he'll be home late tonight. My mom is going to come over later and help me with the kids. A friend invited me to go see Juno with her tonight, but I feel a little bad about asking my mom to do that. I mean, there is a bit of a difference between coming over to help me with my kids and coming over to stay with my kids and do it all yourself while I go out.









Coffee's on!


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Miss Juice* 
and zero on the meditation but 100 on the quiet coffee internet time.

Didn't you get the memo Juice? As of Jan 2008, quiet coffee at the computer qualifies as mediation. So you're all good.


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

How could I forget Heather???? DUDE! I read your post oy late last night and I was freaking seething on your behalf. Inexcusable and ridiculous. I'm so, so sorry you are not getting better advice.







But what to do? Anyone else you can seek out for help? Argh!


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

The kids were up at the a$$ crack of dawn, so they got an early lunch and are napping now before PT. Shh...don't tell them it's not even 11.

Thanks for the support on the







: issues. I will not let his rollercoaster eating drive me batty. Going to try to touch base w/ another LC I know.

Meditation? How does one begin other than the obvious of just yk like sitting quietly.









/end allaboume


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mamameg* 
TC, the iphones are slick, but overpriced, IMO. And John goes on and on about how their security sux and they are easily hackable. Buuuuuuuut..... he's a little paranoid about that kind of thing, and I'm always like, "WHO would want to hack into YOUR phone?"







: But I guess people don't need much reason these days, so I suppose it's a valid point. Something to consider. Not sure it outweighs the cool factor, tho.

that's funny that you say that (security sux and easily hackable) because bill is usually like that about stuff, too. must be the prettiness factor and the potential ease of use for the non-technical person (me) and the ever fascinating apple user interface (UI, in geek speak). so, john going to seattle? hmmm... wonder if he and bill should play the name game...??? do you know...??? i will delete this later, but bill works on software security and content protection stuff and has for the past decade or so. holy crap, he's like getting old, too. a decade of such specific geek work.

ok, squeaking toddler must mean done with breakfast but dad's not paying attention to me...

byeeeeeeeeeeee

~c

eta: jstar is headed to cali with the littles to visit fam.


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

I totally thought that about John and Bill when you mentioned he had worked in Seattle on Rhapsody stuff. Is Bill on Facebook?


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

i was coming to edit my post to say they should play the do you know ___ at Real? game, not just seattle in general, since it's huge, and well, umm... we don't live there.

and bill corrected me: he worked on a project with Real, not actually on Rhapsody, but he worked with a bunch of software developers up there, and some marketing guys, too, i think...

and i don't think he's on facebook, but i will confirm.

back to my coffee... back to your coffee...
















~c


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

he's not on facebook but he is on linked in ("exclusively a professional network"). that would be bill's lovable arrogance coming through.


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

What am I doing today? Right now I'm in one of the dr's offices pak(pumping at the keyboard). I'm a vet tech, and my boss has decided that he doesn't need to hire someone right away and that I'll be ok by myself on wed mornings. I am using this as an excuse to sit down for a minute. I have picked up my kid's cold and I'm wondering if I have bronchitis. I should have called in, but can't. I'm hoping the kids will nap at the same time when I get home so I can rest. Sorry about the rant...gotta go


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Hope Jacquie's trip is going fantabulous!

TC- You crack me up the way you talk about Bill and his personality. It makes me imagine you guys as a hilarious team to hang out with...

Meesa- I don't want to hear you apologize for ranting... dontcha know that's half my posts?







Until you pass that up... no apologies.. LOL. Sorry to hear you aren't feeling well. Hope the day goes quick for you and you get some rest. And did I tell you I really LOVE the name Kade? Good choice mama.

Thanks to all you fine ladies for your support. *Crossing my fingers that my sanity remains intact*


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## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

iPhone. I don't have one, but really love the one that my coworker and SIL has. Beautiful interface, easy to use, lovely internet and email and calendar. I don't see a downside quite frankly beyond the price and service provider. I have CREDO mobile and don't want to switch. I probably will sometime soonish though since my BIL works for iTunes and gets a discount.

The CT scan is the end of it with regards to Annabel and hydrocephalus. The only symptom she has is big head/little body. As far as we can tell this is just her growth pattern and there is no reason to think that there are other issues. I like her ped even though she is more conservative/allopathic than I would expect to like, if that makes sense. If we have more scares that prove to be nothing though I might want to look for someone less trigger happy, y'know? It is hard to know what to do because it is good to have someone with vigilance and I only feel like the CT scan was unnecessary in hindsight.

Aw, shucks, Elsanne. I feel like I rarely post anything other than grammatically incorrect half formed thoughts. If you like that, you should hear some of the stuff I say to each of you in my mind that never make it to the keyboard. I would be at 5000 posts if I could post with just my mental efforts.

I get up at 5:30a to start the day so the idea of getting up early to meditate is kind of scary. The girls are up at 6:00, we eat breakfast, and then they are at daycare by 7:00 so I can start work at 7:30. Once I am here I try to resist the coffee but by 8 I am downing a cup or two most days.

Alas, I should work. At my job. Which is not MDC.








to all


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Thanks for filling us in, Lisa. There is a fine balance between trigger-happy and vigilant, I agree. I walk the line all the time as a student, and often get it wrong in hindsight. But that's life.

Heather - I read your story oy and I thinking of you. It's hard when you want answers and specific help and the provider does not GET IT. Arrgh. While I am one of those people that does NOT think it absolutely necessary for a midwife to have had children herself, I sure am glad I have because it helps me empathize and really CARE about people when they call with questions about things that I've experienced myself - either about me or my kid. My infant not eating = SCARY! Would I tell someone to just wait for 2 days and see what happens? No. Not sure what I would do, but I'm not a pediatric provider.









Lily hair cut, check. Dishwasher loaded, check. DH working on crock-pot dinner, check. Now off to my real "job" today: gotta write up and send the scheduling midwife the student call schedule, learn and write up 10 Spanish phrases for a class assignment, input all my clinic visits from clinic on Monday into the portfolio program, write a 1-page summary on dysuria, write a few paragraphs on the risks of induction for an ongoing research project, then clean the house. All before 3, when the nanny leaves. A glimpse into the life of Sarah!

S.


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## fiddlefern (Nov 9, 2003)

way behind on mmf during my luxurious L.A. vacation (














, but trying to catch up. pausing mid read to say, I too worry a bit about dh's ability to deal with fevers too. And, wouldn't you know it, L has a fever. I took the only working thermometer with me. Dh truly understands the importance of the hydration (he is just as good as me at getting L to take his 16 oz minimum per day), and dh is truly worried about ending up in the ER on IV fluids like we did before the tube. However, he doesn't have quite as many tricks up his sleeve when L is sick, and he just sucks at checking kiddos frequently for temp and responding with blankets off/ clothes off, etc. (he called worried about the fever, but had put L to bed with a comforter.







)

I called this am and fever seems down. Dh did a good job making and serving jello, and is heading out to the store to get popsickles and a thermometer. Must. trust. dh.

Also, meg awesome and very mature response to step-mom sitch.

HF, milk flows better when one is relaxed, but how can one relax when kid isn't eating well? I have been down this road too, and it sucks.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mcsarahb* 
write a few paragraphs on the risks of induction for an ongoing research project, then clean the house. All before 3, when the nanny leaves. A glimpse into the life of Sarah!

S.

I know it's kinda late... but have you checked out the CIMS report on induction and all it's very techniques and the risks associated with them? VERY interesting.. and could help. If you haven't checked it out already. Coalition to Improve Maternity Services. CIMS. Let me know!


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

YEA! on the scan results. (Whew!)

Heath, I just want you to know I'm sending warm fuzzies *your* way, getting your eatin' butt in gear vibes toward HJ, and a big ol' crusty to any health care providers who are clueless. UG.

Jess, major







for you on coming through for the new mama.

Jacquie, that drive would be fun, except for the doing it with kids part.







: Which route are you going? We went to Chaco Canyon around this time of year with my dad and step-mother when T was 2 (over Wolf Creek Pass, IIRC). It was beautiful...

Danile, I totally bow down to you for your studentness. Having 3 kids (incl. a newborn) is a BIG thing. Being a student is a BIG thing. Doing both? BIG BIG. Sorry you're going to have to deal with TJ being gone. All I can say is: 3 kids = cut yourself some slack.

Jello and popsicles are *GREAT* for fevers ("liquid in a form picky kids will accept"). Big







for Husb of Fern.

Renae, I have to say, I've really enjoyed your return.

Hola to everyone else... I won't mention everyone today.







:

I think I've mentioned that we're in another purge cycle at home. We're about 3/4 of the way through the toys. Ug. What a PITA. But, oh, how *good* it feels....







The







:in me really hates all the virgin plastic that comes our way (thank you, grandparents). I feel better when I can pass it on (donate or whatever), I feel awful when the kids break things, lose parts, whatever and we have a big piece of plastic TRASH. But I *do* feel better when it's gone, trash or otherwise. I'm especially happy about culling a bunch of battery-op stuff for donation. The upside to grandparents being so (overly) generous is that by this point, we have a good (ie too big) collection of toys and we can get rid of a bunch with absolutely no pain. (okay, I'll stop, I'm feeling a little nutty talking about this)


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *KKmama* 
(okay, I'll stop, I'm feeling a little nutty talking about this)









: too funny!

I have done a drive from Prescott, Arizona, where I used to live, to Denver, Colorado, that was really beautiful. Everywhere around there is GORGEOUS. Moab, Grand Canyon, Canyon De Chelly....oh the memories of pre-chillern, when life was easy and road trips fun....


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Wow! I have nothing to say but just wanted to be the Morning Goddess for once - I think this is my first time!







:


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

tee hee, Sarah.









Just back from the vet where I learned how to give our kitty (kidney failure) subcutaneous fluids. She's going to love me! NOT! Just buying her some more time (years we hope) as she isn't all that old (9) for a cat.

Nothing on the agenda today for a change!


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 
I have done a drive from Prescott, Arizona, where I used to live, to Denver, Colorado, that was really beautiful. Everywhere around there is GORGEOUS. Moab, Grand Canyon, Canyon De Chelly....oh the memories of pre-chillern, when life was easy and road trips fun....

Yeah, I like living in this area of the country. Lots of beautiful scenery. I remember lots of road trips in college...

You would not believe the night we had. L went through 3 dipes, and she was just wanting to comfort suck (which drives me CRAZY) all night long (Mama was saying no). (1 top eye tooth broke through, the other is almost there.) Z is going through some sleep disruptions, and he kept waking and waking. Dh went up with him, and I went up to trade at ~3:30 (had enough of L), and dh was so out of it that he hadn't realized that Z had wet the bed. And that he (dh) was laying in the puddle. (Nice.) So I got to change Z's sheets (and his jammies) in the middle of the night, too. (I assume dh changed himself.) I'm on my 2nd cup of coffee... But L was being so cute, so charming this morning when we were grocery shopping. I guess I'll try to catch a nap or go to bed early.

Heath, do you catch *any* breaks?


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

I can answer for Heath: no, she does not. And mostly, she hangs in there even all positive and friendly. She is made of stuff I simply am not.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

picturepalooza on blog...


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Kyooooot! Love the pics.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

thanx!


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

catch a break? um, not lately. Colds=yes breaks=no

danile---I did a doubletake at a couple of those jaz pics as she looks so much like my girls at that age. She is well loved and spoiled! How soon til her chiro appt?

oh and now it's snowing!







:

okay time to make the girls something to







: and maybe go







: while I'm at it.

Do I get vegan nun points for giving them a side of edamame w/ dinner? And can I trade those for a sick day? Pretty please?


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Vegan nun points are for when you harvested the edamame yourself. But: the vegan nuns see just how hard you've been working lately and give you tons of credit.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

You guys crack me up.

Her chiro appt is on Tuesday morning. Cross your fingers for us that that's all we need. She's still just so fussy and puking everywhere. I'm trying to do everything I can to get her to at least partially digest some of it. Sometimes she barely latches off and she starts puking up JUST breastmilk. Like it hasn't even had the time to become spitup.







Poor baby.

I'm surviving with TJ gone! Can I say I'm proud of myself?







It's been interesting.. and you don't even want to know what my house looks like.. but hey- babes are cared for right?


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Good...evening, mamas! I'm usually not even online in the evening, but because the childcare situation changed with my friend M.'s group, I only have to go to the next town over to watch the kids.
And...I DON'T WANNA GO!!! *whines*
I just wanna get into my pajamas and relax and waste time and read a book or watch one of my Netflix and WAH.
Okay, mini-pity-party done. I need the money, so...yeah.







:

I don't have a lot of update, but today was a good day; we saw raisin-mama and her girls for a rare playdate, and it went really well, actually! The kids played, we had some tea and talked about music and the playdate ended before anyone lost their shiznit! Woo! I love it when those things just sort of work out.
Then we went to the Verizon store, because I just got a new phone and I wanted to see if they'd transfer the ringtones that *I* bought over to my new phone...they wouldn't.







That is so uncool. Basically they were like "sorry, you'll have to buy them again..." Um NO.
But my new phone is pretty and shiny, and the camera on it is WAY nicer than my old camera, so new pics ahoy! And I look forward to seeing how it takes pics at a show. Whenever I get to another show.

Elsanne, you're probably right about the TV=beastly child thing.







:
I admit I felt really terrible for a moment, but I realize you're not judging, and you're RIGHT.







So I squash down my knee-jerk defensiveness and admit it.
I mean, seriously. Today was a minimal TV-day, and check it out! My kid is awesome.







Sometimes I just need to be reminded. And I threaten with no more TV, EVER, sometimes too!









We did watch the "Rock Monster" video by the Veggie Tales on the computer twice just now though.









Lisa, so good to hear an update.








Heather, I am going to use the







: smiley to wish you some breaks! A GOOD break, of course!

Talking about travel with kidlets; I have to say, I am BLESSED with a child who, like his mama, LOVES to travel.







Wasn't always that way, but Hawaii was a revelation. Dude, at 4am in Los Angeles, he was like "WHEE! We get to ride a BUS!" when we took the shuttle to the car rental place, while we were like







:

You mamas who are traveling, have fun! and good luck!

Okay, I just thought I would log a quick "all about me" check-in and say hi. I hope you're all having a good evening.

Oh my goodness. Maybe I'm the only one, but these smilies freak me OUT:







:







:







:
I'm not sure why, but they just...do.
(well, the 1st tri one is kinda, freakily cute. Alrighty then.)
It's COLD.







: I have to go get ready to go to work. Again I say, WAH!
Later, mamajamas.


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Danile- just a quick thought: how is your supply? Have you had issues with oversupply with your other babes? It just popped into my head because what you're describing sounds like Lily's first two months with my oversupply issues.

Sigh. Boring class. Yawn.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Hmmm.. hard to say.

My previous to pp time periods I was severely engorged for a while afterwards. My doc caught me nursing in her office and yelled at me that I desperately needed a pump or I would get mastitis (my breasts were purple, red and KILLING me...) This time they were major engorged for the first week.. and now fairly normal. They do burn really bad when she gets my milk to let down.. and sometimes she chokes and pulls off when that happens.. I don't know.. You tell me.. LOL I guess it could be, but it might not be? But wouldn't she be gaining weight better? Isaac was gaining a pound a week. At 7.10 at birth he was at 8.14 at two weeks...


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

sarah---it was your oversupply that helped me figure out mine way back when. the milk would just come up in buckets until I started with the block feedings and serious mondo engorgement in the interim. oh sweet milky memories.









the ped called a little while ago and I was reminded why I







her more than any of the other ones in the practice. She had some actual suggestions that I'm going to pursue.

















stillallaboutme...


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

fast weight gain is a total tipoff w/ oversupply. iirc hers isn't quite that much, but she's also spewing lots. For me it was a week of getting hugely painfully engorged and then it was much, much better. read up at kellymom and see if it fits.


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## eccomama (Oct 6, 2005)

i'm a may 2004 mama. can i play?


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

Heather~I've seen some cats do really well on fluids and live quite a while(6 months to a year). I hope yours does.

Kk~Your night sounds awful







(Here is me sending you lots of sleeping vibes at your house







: ) It sounds an awful lot like mine last night. Kade would NOT fall asleep. I tried everything. Finally, around 11, DH took him downstairs so I could go to sleep. It still didn't help because I coughed all night







I went in late to work so I could sleep in a little bit though.

I went to the doc and he thinks my cough is aggravated(sp?) by all the drainage in my throat. He wants me to take a decongestant, but I'm hesitant. I don't want to cause milk supply issues. My body is very touchy that way, everything affects it. I was going to post something in breastfeeding, but wondered if you wise mamas had any other ideas.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Would a simple saline solution work without affecting your supply? Posing this as a question.. as I don't know. The docs wanted Dom on afrin awhile back... I was not comfortable with that. We used saline just fine.


----------



## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

And certainly a nice warm welcome Ecco!

Jump on in! The MMF (May Moms Forever!) waters are warm if I do say so myself...


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

meesa: i wouldn't do the decongestant, either. it's known to decrease milk supply pretty significantly, and if you already know your body is sensitive and your milk supply is affected, i would do other things first and save the decongestant as a last, last, absolutely last resort and only if it was lingering and causing much discomfort.

other things to try: neti pot? (not sure about this for post nasal drip stuff, though. anyone else?) homeopathics? here's a favorite page of mine for sore throat and here's the same sites main index page. there is also a great article written by dana ullman about common childhood illnesses and homeopthic remedies, but goldurnit if i can't find it right now after using every possible search term i can come up with while two short people explode our already disatrous office...

jump on in, eccomama!

~claudia


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

hI there eccomama! What made you choose your username? I see you are a newbie around here, bwa ha ha ha ha!!!! *rubs hands together gleefully*

Renae, SOOOO NOT JUDGING! Glad you understand that. It is very much not my place to do so. Just sharing my own observances of Sol, yk? You, I love great gonzos.

meesa, you got your answer from missturbo, and as you can see from her title there, there's not much else for us to tell you. She really DOES know everything. SO SORRY to hear about your awful night and your awful cough, I have had those nights and so I hear ya. When I was preg (both times) I got very ill, and I remember distinctly one memorable night where I wore a cloth diaper in between my legs and soaked it. eeeeeewwww


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Wait, aren't there some terribly nosey and invasive questions we all have asked/answered along the way that we could ask of these new gals? I am so happy to have fresh blood!

Something like: how did you pick your username (got that one to ecco in prev. post, see above), how did you pick your spouse and meet him/her, what else? oh, what do you like to do in that fantasy time called "spare time", any interesting tidbits about yourself? What is something about yourself we would never guess? How old are you? etc....


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## fiddlefern (Nov 9, 2003)

back from cali, on p 12 tryin to catch up with the reading, pausing to say,

[email protected]$%^ it's cold in Portland! I got so spoiled with all that warm sunshine and those clear L.A. skies. But it's good to see my two other guys







. Dh and L were waiting at the bus stop across the street from our house this afternoon when W and I got off.







L was smiling from ear to ear. One of those moments when motherhood feels worth it.


----------



## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Welcome, ecco! Jump right in.

Meesa - so sorry to hear you're feeling icky. That is no fun when trying to mama. I would have to agree with the no decongestant, if your supply is touchy. But of course if you are absolutely miserable, it might be worth just one dose so you can get some sleep. No sleep begets supply issues, too...The neti pot with saline works somewhat for my sinus congestion, which is also usually the cause of throat drainage...it's worth a try. You can also use a turkey baster or even a little pitcher (like a gravy boat, with a little spout).

Danile- IME, oversupply does not necessarily = fast weight gain. It can, of course, but that wasn't true in our case. Lily gained normally, not above average. It turned out she was getting tons of foremilk and almost no hindmilk. She pulled off and gagged, spit up undigested milk, and had lots of gas. My problem was oversupply + overactive let-down, which made her gag and sputter and refuse to nurse. We eventually figured it out after a couple of weeks. I had to either express or pump before nursing her for a while, then gradually decrease the volume and force of milk by block feeding (feeding only one side for several feedings). It took us at least 2 months to get to where she actually *liked* to nurse and wouldn't cry and fight at the breast. I have no idea if this is your problem, though. I think kellymom.com has a list of signs/symptoms that might be helpful if you think this might be it.

Sarah


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## afishwithabike (Jun 8, 2005)

You know I always forget this is here. I can't believe they're turning FOUR this year. Crazy isn't it?


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## fiddlefern (Nov 9, 2003)

Ok, all caught up. I'm in a daze of posts. What sticks out?

Welcome, ecco, and yay meesa for jumpin on in. And welcome back, fish-w-a-bike









heatherfeather and danile, I SERIOUSLY don't know how you mamas do it.

Yay for the return to mmf of renae and nuggets, safe travels for jstar and jacqueline (I waved to jacq and KK as I flew over Colorado today!)

hooray for the actually-no-big-deal news from lisa. Oh and lisa, even though you feel the emotional roller-coaster was not worth it, you are right about that being a hindsight observation. No way to know until you got through it all.









sarahbee, I am enjoying your more frequent postage as of late.









Renae, thanks for the article. I agree that real-life meetings with flesh-and-blood, warts-and-all people are super important. I am so thankful to have irl mama friends! (some of whom I met right here in the May Mamas!) It seems like the mama who wrote the article was drifting about both irl and online, till she was able to let down her gaurd and bond. The relationships we have developed here over the past 4 years are a close second to being able to see each other in person, and there's something comforting about being able to get the mmf love 24-7.







I am so thankful for all of you!


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## afishwithabike (Jun 8, 2005)

I just wish I would have been here for the DDC before Lilly was born. I love you ladies.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

alright alright... i'll head on over to kellymom..









sarah- you described my sitch to a t- only- she always wants to nurse and suck... like she's always hungry or has a strong sucking need. I lovingly call her my little piranha...


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Darn it, I have NO TIME for a proper post this morning. Fridays are the s*ckiest!
eccomama, HI!








Welcome welcome!
Fish with a bike! YAY!!







Welcome back!

We love you all, and we rule, so jump on in!









Okay seriously, that's all I have time for. Grr.

Fridays suck because we leave the house at 9:30, and Rowan doesn't return until 6 or so, when DH picks him up from the nanny gig, and then *I* don't get home till closer to 8, specially if I have to stop at the grocery stgore or something on the way home. Loooooong day indeed.







:

Anyway, hope you all have a good day. I'll try to write something with more substance this weekend!







We'll see how that works out.


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

Dang, Renae, that *IS* a long day! I hate days when I get home late - it's such a sprint to get everything done and people fed and changed and storied and bedded...

Well, I'm certain I had something else to say. Maybe the







: has frozen my brain.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

We're







: here today too! And sick coughing kids with snotty noses are plentiful. Thankfully HJ only has minor symptoms atm, but my loud coughing makes him cry!







His







: is eh. Called for a feeding eval per convo w/ our awesome ped. 4-5wk wait seems like forever!

My head is fluff on 4 hrs sleep, I should have just haiku'd it:

cough and snot abounds
little mister man won't eat
phlegm is not your friend


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

a most excellently constructed haiku, heath. fabulous choices of words. wish you weren't all sick and wish HJ would







:







: for feeding eval soon. oh, and btw, your E is hilarious.

in other all about me news, i have an iphone!!! just activated it, like 2 minutes ago, though, so no idea what it's going to do for me yet. but woohoo! new toy! that's only for me! well, and the 3.5 year old obsessed with youtube.

~claudia


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Just here with a little whine. L had the hardest time going to sleep last night. She woke up with a slight fever, and all this crusty stuff around her ear. (Oh, so *that's* why you couldn't sleep.














Z is complaining that his ear hurts, too. And I have a major sore throat and hurty ears, too. I imagine that the 3 of us all have some kind of virusy ear nasty. Never again will I comment on a prolonged period of wellness (as I did NY's Day)... I feel like I've cursed us. Off to the shower to try to decongest. (who was it asking about that? I wouldn't do a decongestant... I'd do lots of steam, the saline nasal stuff, lots of liquids, etc)

Howdy to the new folks.

If phlegm is not my friend, and phlegm is not Heather's friend, who *is* phlegm's friend?

And this is all I have to say to Renae:







:


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

My bff told me about the neti pot and I've looked around and can't find one. I've been laying with my head hanging off the side of the couch and doing saline that way







It seems to help though. I took the kids with me in the bathroom this morning so they could breath the steam. Kade started gagging as soon as we got out and puked everywhere







I guess it worked though...
Last night he was worse than the night before. He cried off and on until 2 am.
He seems fine now, he keeps looking at me, saying "yay" and clapping









I'm 26, DH is 27. I got my username from my hubby. Meesa is his nickname for me and 143 are the number of letters in the words I love you. It started with ebay and now that's my username everywhere.
I met DH our last semester of high school. I used to ditch my last class to watch him play soccer and juggle







The 9th anniversary of our first date is in March.
Things I like to do: crafty stuff I'll do pretty much anything, snowboarding, water skiing, I have a shopping habit, anything outdoors.
DH and I are fire performers(not so much since I got pg with K), we juggle, eat fire, stilt walk, etc.
Ummm...that's enough about me.


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

Saige did her own hair this morning. She put it in a ponytail and put some clips on the sides. She is so proud of herself, it's cute


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *meesa143* 
DH and I are fire performers(not so much since I got pg with K), we juggle, eat fire, stilt walk, etc.

whoa. you are cooler than cool, like elsanne cooler than cool.









and how funny about the 143. bill and my "special" number is 8, for the number of letters in the phrase i love you. there is a cheesy story about that, but toddler is preventing me from typing it out now.

and i am very much liking my new iphone, yes, yes, i am.

~claudia


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

"get people bedded"? They have a name for that service: pimpin'!

lolol just had to laugh. Because otherwise, I'll cry...

ladies....

help me here:

I'm pregnant. And I don't know what the hell I'm going to do...

option 1) Abort. This would be because I don't think I can do this again, and money is always a worry and issue (which I don't feel is a good reason, because things always work out). My heart is not in this choice.

2) Have it. Assuming I carry it to term. My support network might just roll their eyes at "accident" #3.

The irony is that I made the appt probably within days of conceiving to get an IUD, which was today. However, I still wasn't bleeding, and she (the doc) recommended a blood test which came out positive.

Ack. Ack. ACK. I don't know what I want from youguys, because opinions on my situation I do not want. I want a hug. I want a circle of women to crowd round me while I cry and then I want to go to the mountain and ask what the hell I'm supposed to do.


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## afishwithabike (Jun 8, 2005)

I dislike long days too. IT's too hard on Lilly. She gets grumpy and short with her little brother EACH and every time. Poor things.


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## afishwithabike (Jun 8, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 
"get people bedded"? They have a name for that service: pimpin'!

lolol just had to laugh. Because otherwise, I'll cry...

ladies....

help me here:

I'm pregnant. And I don't know what the hell I'm going to do...

option 1) Abort. This would be because I don't think I can do this again, and money is always a worry and issue (which I don't feel is a good reason, because things always work out). My heart is not in this choice.

2) Have it. Assuming I carry it to term. My support network might just roll their eyes at "accident" #3.

The irony is that I made the appt probably within days of conceiving to get an IUD, which was today. However, I still wasn't bleeding, and she (the doc) recommended a blood test which came out positive.

Ack. Ack. ACK. I don't know what I want from youguys, because opinions on my situation I do not want. I want a hug. I want a circle of women to crowd round me while I cry and then I want to go to the mountain and ask what the hell I'm supposed to do.


I am praying for peace in your situation and that you come to a conclusion that YOU can live with. It's your body and you are the one that has to live with whatever action is taken. Please know that we're here for you sweetie. It's so tough honey. (((((HUGS)))))


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

Oh, elsanne! Biggest of hugs to you. Hang on, it's going to work out.


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Ok, this calls for a supportive-loving-empathetic smilie parade...























:






















:







:







:






















:







:














:







:






















:







:







:






















:

















I wish I knew the right words to say, or to tell you what to do, els. Give yourself some time, some space to think and ponder. See if Viet can take the girls out somewhere for a long time so you can just think/be sad/whatever.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Oh Els,

I will not push my advice on you since you clearly just want the support. Sit and cry with me anytime. I believe in you. You can do it. Of all people- you are Elsanne! Major *HUGS*! And who cares what your "support" group thinks! This is the one time you will hear me get anywhere close to profanity.. LOL... SCREW THEM. No matter what they should be loving you for the amazing woman that you are!

We love u Els!!


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Els--*hugs* I've always felt an energy of three kids with you, a boy specifically.







: Now that I know that three is crazy busy fun, i wouldn't recommend against it. Take some time with yourself and really listen to what your heart is telling you. Always here for you no matter what.


----------



## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Aw Heath. I'm feelin' the boy energy too. Ack. Ack. ACK.

Still in freakout mode, and LOVING the supportive words everyone. Thank you.


----------



## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

Elsanne, I'm so sorry you are faced with this decision. We love you no matter what.
























































:







:







:


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

And speaking from my experience with "surprise" may babe Dom...

I don't think there are such things as accidents or mistakes... some things seem to happen whether we are ready or not. Sometimes we can only make the best choice for us- no matter how scary and have faith that it will work out for us in the end.

Let us know if there is anything we can do besides just support.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Viet is voting abortion. *sigh*

*double sigh*


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

els:





















major super duper mondo giganto







s

you need a mini retreat, methinks. one day of quiet, silent meditation on a mountain, out in nature, something, somewhere. you need to figure out what YOU need and want to do. although viet gets to VOICE his preference, he really has NO SAY in making this choice. it is your choice alone. which is the scariest kind of choice, in my opinion, because when i have these choices, i get to revel in the gloriousness of it but also suck it when it's the suckiest.
























you need a trip to see some MMF. that's what you need. yup.

~c

p.s. after your iud/miscarry sitch, i totally thought to myself she is destined to have another child, that's just the energy i feel from her. yes, i am the woo-woo. support, support, support from me for whatever you choose, though.


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Elsanne- You have my complete, utmost support no matter what you decide. I am sending you warm, loving support from my innermost woman-loving midwife heart. Only you know what is best for yourself, your body, your heart, your family. Thank you for trusting us with your thoughts.

Sarah


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

I don't have any advice, just lots of support and hugs


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *TurboClaudia* 
p.s. after your iud/miscarry sitch, i totally thought to myself she is destined to have another child, that's just the energy i feel from her. yes, i am the woo-woo. support, support, support from me for whatever you choose, though.

I too thought this but hesitated to say so. thanks tc. Whatever Els decides, I'm behind you!


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Ug, I've been there (and hence, I have 3 kids). My first thought was where Viet was on this, because it would be hard (but not impossible) to do it alone. And yes, since the IUD thing, I've been wondering if you were pg again; just felt it. Might have more to say elsewhere.


----------



## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

what gives? seriously. I must have royally pissed off the universe or something.

hj spiked a fever and ped is sending us to the ER. Whee! The fun dowsn't stop around here.


----------



## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

Dear Universe,
The May Mamas need a collective break. Enough is enough.

Sincerely,
Jessica

Heath, please update when you can. While I'm sure he's fine, I'm thinking of you and sending you a very warm cup of cyber-chamomile tea. And a big, fat







: all around.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Thank you for representing us Juice.








: at the universe


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Heath, please let us know all is okay with HJ. I am sending you "coping" vibes, and once all's clear, "thriving" vibes. Lisa sent me a card that I have on my mirror that says, "Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant." which reminds me to not just be in harried-mama mode all the time. Just, 99.46% of it.

Well, we're processing here. It's not lovely, although I am strangely peaceful at this exact moment (not, however, 10 minutes ago. so, very up and down). Viet has not changed his position and that pares down my options to some pretty yukky ones:

a) Abort, resent him for a long time. Maybe forever.

b) Abort, try to get over it and move on.

c) Have it, without his support. Ouuuch.

d) Have it and hope for his support. (is that the same as c?)

e) Move to Bali and drink daiquiris (virgin) until it's time to birth. Send girls my love.

f) Hide under the covers and wish fervently this were a bad dream.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Oh, and Meesa, fire performers?







Very stinkin' cool. Especially the stilt part. I learned how to walk on stilts once upon a time and it is not easy. I liked how you just tossed that out there last. You are funneh!

Happy to have fishbike back too!

Youguys can't imagine what your words mean to me. Love the smilie parade, keep going back to it and looking and smiling. Sarah's midwifetobe words, TC's "just knowing", KK's sweetest pm and more. Love you all.

Part of my ponderings include a strong sense of boneheadedness for playing with fire, like jstar said.

another is that this child would be a Libra. LOVE libras.

another is that if Viet wants me to get an abortion, he can pay for the whole stinkin' ordeal, thankyouverymuch. And, most likely, lose me in the process.

Ugh. More thoughts as they arive.

Heath, also want to comment on the genius haiku. I am not so drowning in my misery I can't keep up with y'all.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Els- if you consider option d, please message me. i have a very personal experience i'd like to share.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

I'd love to hear it, Danile! pm away!


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

elsanne, I can't get past the fact that even in your most conflicted hour, you are an evergiving friend. When you feel totally tapped, when your life is coming up all around you, you somehow find it in you to give props to your friends, and that is only the beginning of what makes you such an amazing person.

And yes, I said your life is coming *up* around you, not down. I have too much faith in the universe to think that this is some crazy punishment for you.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Okay... now lets see if I can get all three babes tucked in and get to studying...

Major worried about Heather too... hoping babe is doing okay! It'll be a long wait till we get news anyway. ER's are such a pain most of the time.


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## Jacqueline (Jun 11, 2003)

Hey, elsanne....checking in here from Phoenix (not too far from you) to give you a huge, gigantic







I support you in whatever you choose, of course, no questions.

I second some of those who have said what a life giver you are, though. You exude such energy and vibrance, and that's just online! Timing issues can suck, though, I agree. If I could move down to Mexico to help you with another one, I would (does your village need any Episcopal priests?







)

I ask the universe to give you peace, above all. You will discover what you need to do when you listen to your inner voice. You're good at that. And, in the meantime, we are here for you.


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

today, I think technology is way cool. I love this new iPhone, I love my new sonicare toothbrush (which was totally intimidating me), I love starter logs for fireplaces, I love that I count you all amongst my friends and that with these "internets" I know what is happening in your lives almost to the minute.

I also love that I am sitting by the fireplace at our beach house and the moon is shining down through the trees and streaming through the skylights over the dining area...

It is butt cold, though.









Heath: thinking of you...
Els: thinking of you...

~claudia

Eta: there are a lot more capital letters in this post than I usually use. That is due to this dang smart iphone inserting them where it has been taught they are appropriate and has nothing to do with use of a shift key by the real life claudia. Please do not be alarmed.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Quickly. No news is no news. They admitted him, did all the necessary ugly tests. Home now to decompress, shower, eat breakfast and play girl swap w/ dh. more on the bloggity. Hope the doctor will get by to see dh on rounds before too long.

The most funnest part?? I got 20! whole minutes! of sleep last night.


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## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

How's the light of the morning treating you, Elsanne? I read the thread late last night and have been thinking about you all night. I too hope for peace for you in this situation. There will be a path through this and I am so glad that we online friends are here for you and that I am one of them. I wish we could circle around you in real life and create a retreat for you to be with your thoughts, your spirit, and your body. No question you will find the answer and you have my full support no matter how you move forward.

Heather, I hope it helps you to know that we all adore and are all in awe of you. You really can not get a break.







I am so sorry that HJ is sick. Did they give an indication as to what the cause may be when they admitted him? Poor babe and poor YOU. Getting through the day on so little sleep is horrible on top of the stress of the day itself. When my dad was sick my mom would get someone to drive her to/from the hospital, partly because she was dangerous, but also because she could then sleep for the 20 minute drive. I hope he gets better quickly and you get some much needed, deserved, over-due downtime.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Elsanne, I am going to PM you because I have some experience with the "a" option.







If you want to hear it, that is. If not, I totally understand.








And I also just wanted to say that I support you IN WHATEVER you choose to do, sweetheart.







I wish I could fly out there and be your nanny for a few weeks, give you tea and let you cry, and just offer my love and support.
But what I can do is offer my love and support from here, and send vibes vibes vibes of peace and love to you.








We all love you, Elsanne. So very much!
Let me know if there's anything else I can do.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Loving youguys, thanks for the warm words and PMs, and I've come to a decision. I'm not going to have the baby.

I feel very calm and at peace with this, after some serious soul-searching last night. I did an extensive tarot spread and it was pretty clear what I needed to do.

Step 1: take pennyroyal tea, mega doses of Vit. C, pulsatilla, and parsley up the vagina.

If that doesn't work, I have progressively more invasive strategies.

A complete change of heart from yesterday, but I don't think it'll change again. I so appreciate all of your support, thank you, from the bottom of my heart.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

*HUGS* Els!

Thinking of you... hoping you find peace in your decision. I know it was hard for you.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Thanks, Danile. It wasn't easy.

I do feel very calm and at peace about it today, unlike yesterday. Viet and I fought like cats and dogs about it too, mainly about money and responsibility. I want him to pay for the whole thing, and he said half, and I said okay, then, let's also go halvsies on the monthly bills, no? (them's fightin' words). I also threw in there, in the heat of the moment, that it wasn't ME requesting sex every night.

The thought of having the baby threw me for a total loop. The thought of not having the baby calms me. There is not a way I can support myself without working, and working through the babyhoods of my children thus far has been pretty hellish.

To clinch things, my "boss" from that big house (Type A New Yorker) called me up tonight, after getting home from a long hard day herding the girls by myself and after a long hard night with Viet, and berated me severely for not doing a better job and knowing that, for example, the bedroom lamps were not plugged in or had different watt-value bulbs in them.

Regardless of that bullsh!t, I am more concerned about the health and welfare of little HJ, because jobs/bosses come and go, but children are here to stay. is there an update Heather? I did read the comments in your blog so I know he's got viral meningitis. I am SO SORRY. For him, and for you. I hope you get good sleep tonight, as much as possible.


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## nuggetsmom (Aug 7, 2002)

Well, I am checking in here just in time to send lots of support to Heather and Elsanne.

Elsanne, I know you know what it is that you need in your own life and I am sending hugs to you in this adventure. This is a harddecision to make and I feel for you. No matter what you decide there will be regret over the path not taken. That being the nature of difficult decisions.

Wow!

Healing vibes to HJ

now I will take my ddrunk self to the couch to have some more water and go to bed. other than that my life is relatively boring.


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Hey, if y'all haven't checked Heather's blog, please check the Sat. post (comments) for updates on HJ. He has viral meningitis, he'll be in the hosp. until Monday at least.

Big hugs to you, Els. Sending you a PM in a few...


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

hi mamas,
checking in before i head out of internet-zone this morning. yipes - lotsa big news.

isn't meningitis scary scary???? or is that only bacterial meningitis and not viral? lots of prayers for HJ. now i'll be worried for a week! i hope he is doing well at the hospital

els - what a tough decision. you sound like you found your path. being deep in the 'endurathon' part of babyhood right now boy do i get it. big hugs from me (article be darned)

our trip has been fun so far except ebin is having some mysterious freakout. he's been waking about 7 times a night. strange environs i guess. but then last night he was just SCREAMING. he woke 4 times between 11pm and 12. and then was inconsolable. and i was maxed out. i don't know if it is just the teeth or he has an earache (lots of headshaking). and then he is gassy and i think he's got some stomach distress thing bugging him. plus the snotties are starting. i layed down with him and he slept until 7am when he started screaming and not nursing. (he did not nurse after midnight so this was mighty wacky.) isaac's only nursing strike was when he was sick. so i'm a little scared that we're heading to 8500 ft with a sick baby this morning









i miss doug. i have no way to talk to him now







which is good to make one appreciate someone!

ok. i have to pack


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Good lord, seriously, I am begging the Universe for a BREAK for my May Mamas! Winter of our discontent, much?








Heather, sending so many healing vibes to HJ and calm peaceful mama-vibes to YOU!







: I'm so sorry this has been so hard. I'll keep looking for updates. Love you, mama!

Elsanne.







I just want you to know that you are supported and loved and I am so glad you are finding peace with your decision! Please let me know if there's ANYTHING I can do, even from far away. Sending love and peaceful vibes your way too.

*sigh*
So, in the face of everything ELSE going on, this is minor







: but I have to share, because I was thrown into a total depression because of it (well, not ONLY it) for some reason--it's not like my kid has never smacked me before.








Last night, after a full day of (no TV, mind you!







)...after a full day of not listening to a word DH and I said, not napping (he never naps), and just generally being a total poop, by the end of the night, I was DONE. He came upstairs from the basement where he had been playing with DH for some time, and I asked him to put his shoes away. He refused, put them RIGHT NEXT to the little cubby his shoes usually go into, JUST to see what I would do (he does this A LOT. A WHOLE LOT!














and I asked him several times, calmly, mind you! to put them where they belonged. He refused, and screeched when I asked a final time. So I said "okay, well, then you're going up to bed with no story tonight."
Commence ALL HOLY UTTER HE!! BREAKING LOOSE.








There was screaming, there was throwing things, there was crying, and more screaming. I picked him up and tried to gently tell him why this was happening, and...he slapped me in the face. HARD. Left a mark for a good couple hours, hard.
I put him down abruptly, and had to push him away from me just so I wouldn't haul off and slap him back. I yelled a good deal though.







: DEFINITELY not a good-mama moment.






















We finally got him to sleep, relatively calmly, and I went into my room and cried for an hour or so.

I couldn't even bring myself to get out of bed this morning. Rowan didn't want me anyway. We didn't go to church, I haven't eaten yet, DH took Rowan with him to get a haircut (DH needed the haircut







) and I am here alone, crying again because I still feel so bad.
I don't have the energy to be a mama today. I can't stand these power struggles and I am NOT looking forward to tomorrow, when DH goes back to work. I am so tired of being a harda$$. Talking all gently and cheerfully DOES NOT WORK.

I don't need any advice or opinions, I know it'll pass, I know where to look for resources on what to do...I just really needed to get it of my chest to some women I trust.
*sigh*

I hate feeling so bad, and again, it seems so tiny next to the other stuff the Universe seems to be throwing at everyone else.
I'm just SO tired.









Here's to a more pleasant day for everyone else...


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

Heather, major love and healing vibes coming from here. Been thinking about little HJ a lot, as well as you and the rest of your family. I hope he is mending up nicely and that's the end of that. Is anyone suggesting maybe this is why he's been having an increasingly difficult time eating?

Els, I'm so sorry you have to do this, but completely understand why you do. I'm glad you feel a sense of peace around it and relief from the daunting promise of another round of baby days. They are a complete drain of self, a drain I have been privileged to have, but don't want to have ever again. I feel you, sister.









Renae,







I have had those moments and they suck in a way I never knew things could suck. I really, really want to recommend again the book I am reading, Scream Free Parenting. I've only read the forward and Chap 1 at this point, but I can tell you, after having a VERY hard day on Thursday (much like the one you just had) I decided to spend Thursday night getting into the book, and Friday and Sat and now Sun have been visibly different. I already notice a change in myself and my DH in how we are interacting with the kids. And just a quick suggestion sweetie, and please don't take this wrong, because I can tell you I have learned this from personal experience of trial and repeated error.... next time, let the shoe thing go. Next to the shoe cubby is good enough, or you can put them there yourself and thank him for helping you. Model the behavior instead. Making it a big power struggle never helps, IME. All that said, I'm sorry you had such a rough day. I know how it goes, and it does pass.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Thanks for the book recommendation again. I need to pick it up. Oh hey, maybe when I go to the mall later today to meet my friend for a movie. *nods*

And trust me, I would have let the shoe thing go, and maybe I STILL should have...but it was after a WHOLE DAY of similar things happening. I know in the long run, it would have been better...I'm just...

Nevermind. I can't explain anymore. Later.


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

You don't need to explain anymore, R. I totally understand. BTDT, many times.


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Heather, Elsanne, Renae...* Just thinking of you all.


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

Thinking healthy for HJ, and sending so much love and support to his mama. I hope he's improving quickly and that everyone is home tomorrow.

Continued hugs and support for elsanne. You sound so much better.

Renae, just a big







and a bunch of BDTD's too. Some days just keep dishing it out, it seems.


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## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

heather







elsanne







renae


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

s heath, els, renae


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

I am the morning goddess!









Amara woke me up wanting to nurse, so we did, then I just couldn't stop thinking about her and her cuteness, and the wad of parsley in my vagina, and the great amounts of abortifacient tea and vit C making me need to pee, so I've been up since a little before 5. Got out of bed at 5.45 and happily here, coffee in belly, it's 7 am, I'm expecting noises from the bedroom any moment.

I realized just now that I had xrays on my spine done right around conception date, like day 2 or 3. Every so often I get pangs of "must abort child RIGHT NOW or else it will develop more..." but I don't feel very sad, like I thought I would, about who he/she is or would be. It's a very, very strange feeling. I feel pretty settled, as much as I can, while still being pregnant.

Viet made NO money at the faire this weekend trying to sell his paintings. He feels pretty discouraged. He went to go visit his mom last night and I mentioned he might want to ask her about borrowing money for the abortion, and he plans to ask his brother.

So strange how I'm feeling, in terms of I ALWAYS supported a woman's right to choose, but thought I'd never get an abortion myself, just couldn't do it. Live and learn. Experiences like this (and having children) keep throwing back in my face all the "I'd never..." statements I once made.

I will probably, whether or not you want it, continue to keep youguys abreast of my process of this thing. Please do tell me if it's too unsettling for any reason.

Thinking so so much about HJ and fam.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Elsanne, I am completely okay with you keeping us all abreast of your progress. Having gone through similar circumstances, it is painful, but in an empathetic way...if that makes sense. I want to give you a million








s. Even if they can't be "real", I hope you can feel my love, care and concern despite the miles. Your calm is inspiring.







I hope you have a good day today!

Everyone else, too.









This morning I am feeling much better, after a day of reflection and um, too much sleeping (







: I spent MOST of yesterday sleeping; so many kudos to DH for keeping the house from falling down while Mama was buried beneath the covers all day/afternoon!) and then yesterday evening I met my wonderful Mama-friend M. for a movie (Sweeney Todd--I cannot TELL you how much I loved that movie! It was fabulous!) and dinner, then running into my club-friend D. and spending an hour at a gay bar (all before midnight, mind you!







) I was much improved. DH was awake when I got home and he could tell I had needed the night out. And since I didn't have a drink (minus a sip of beer from my friend's bottle) and went to bed before 1am, I was ready for Rowan when he woke up at 7:10 this morning, despite having gone to bed at 9pm the night before!







He also seems in pretty good spirits. We're gelling...for now. Hah.

Yesterday, during one of the rare times Rowan and I interacted, he crawled into my lap and said "you're not feeling well, Mama?" And I said "no, not really" and he said "because I hit you last night and you're sad?" and I said "well, that's a part of it, yeah" and he kind of said "hmm" and sat in my lap, just hugging me. It helped, and I think we both needed it.

Anyway, I just thought I would give an update. I wasn't going to post much about it again, but then I saw there was a Morning Goddess this morning and I felt the need to respond!









We have a chiro appointment this morning and then I have to nanny later this afternoon, so it's kind of a busy day. I hope everyone else has a nice calm day.

Thinking of you, Heather.









Thank you all for your support and







It means so much.


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

els, we're here to support you no matter what. I know that you are doing the right thing for yourself and your family, and I cannot imagine how hard it must be, though you sound very grounded and calm.

Renae, so glad you are feeling better. A little mama-space makes a big difference. And so sweet of Rowan to check up on you - it sounds like a little reconnection was in order and that was good for both of you.

Trotting off to see if there are any updates from Heather, and continuing to send light and love and speedy healing vibes to her and HJ.


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Els, please do keep us informed, that's the way we'll be able to keep supporting you. I'm glad you came to a decision you are comfortable with. You know we love ya!

Renae, sorry to hear of your bad day. I have days like that too, and the best thing is to do just what you did, find something to do to recharge yourself as a person.

Turbo, I just got a Sonicare toothbrush too! I love it! And I agree on the wonders of technology.

Heading off to a playdate with a group of friends this afternoon. Continually thinking of Heather and HJ....


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Now just wanting an update from Heather, hoping that things are settling down for her (and HJ), too?

Renae, I think it's great that you were able to get some extra rest and some extra space. And yeah, I think that when they're being little creeps, letting them know that Mama has feelings too is important (and I think you handled that just fine). Honestly, if they learn to walk all over us, they'll walk all over other people, too, and that's not what anyone needs. I've talked to T about similar stuff, and I've let him know that it's *great* that he can forgive so instantaneously, but that when he does/says something to me that really hurts, *I* can't just *let go* of it as quickly as he can, and that he should keep that in mind when he's in an unfriendly way. Dunno if this helps, just want you to know you're not alone.









Els, please keep us updated. We want to be supportive, we want to be with you in this, and the best way for us to be there is to stay abreast of what's going on and how you're doing.

Yesterday was the 10th anniversary of my brother's death. 10 years seems like such a long period of time, but also like nothing. I spent a lot of time in quiet reflection. His death so dramatically changed the course of my life... honestly, I don't think I would have had kids if he hadn't died (and *now* look).

I resonate with the spirit of what you said, Elsanne... I just think that we don't always know what lies ahead. We don't always know how we will respond to what life dishes up for us.


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

I just have to say that you mamas are awesome! So down to earth and supportive of each other, it's great. I'm glad I found you.

I'm still coughing up my lungs and K is teething now with a cough still. I'm thinking I need to call the dr back and tell him this isn't working and I need to try something else. DH has the day off







We were going to go snowboarding, but with the two of us like this I don't think we're going anywhere







I'm pretty bummed about it.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

oh man Meesa that bites. Jstar loves snowboarding too so she will "get" it. I don't, but I know what it's like to be sick and miss something I adore! Especially sans kiddos!

Thank you, thank you, thank you again for the wonderful supportive things you all have said/ are sayig. I adore you.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

We're home! We see the GI tomorrow afternoon and maybe I'll know more then or not. Just glad to be outta there!


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

so so so SO glad to hear you guys are home! I hope the GI appt. is super duper productive.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

SOOOOO GLAD TO HEAR from you heath. how are you both?


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

HJ seems glad to be home as am I. I have no idea how I am truly. Just fried.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 
SOOOOO GLAD TO HEAR from you heath. how are you both?


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Heather! So glad you're home and HJ is feeling better. I feel like I can breathe again...

Meesa, sorry you're still sick. Sounds like the decongestant might be called for after all.

Renae - glad you're feeling better. Kids are not easy. They can hurt us. Glad you got an evening out to rejuvenate.

Els - I appreciate the updates, too. I totally hear you. I'm thinking of you often and am glad you are feeling peaceful and "right."'

Love to all my dear mamas.

S.


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## fiddlefern (Nov 9, 2003)

I have missed a lot since my last post.

Heather, I am so happy to hear that you are back from the hospital. I am so glad your doctor sent you to the ER, and that HJ is ok. That's some scary stuff. I am really glad the GI appointment got moved up (at least that's what I'm assuming, since you mentioned a feeding eval in a month- are those diff appts?). I am wishing you all the support you can get with your family right now.

Elsanne, I am appreciating you sharing all of your thoughts about this with us. For what it's worth, I have had a couple almost-babies myself. First was a time where I thought I was pregnant, but had just been exposed to a nasty chemical reaction (chem lab screw-up) and was seriously thinking about aborting, but it turned out I wasn't pregnant. The second was a barely-started baby I didn't know I had until I had a miscarriage. Those almost-babies are still with me, not really as a sad thing, just there. And I am thankful that I have the two boys I have, not four kids!

You have so much wisdom about what the right thing is for you and your family, and I have faith in that. I love that you are trying some natural methods before you try the high-intervention routes. It would be hard for me to "wait," but I think it is beautiful that you are seeing if you can work with your body to reach the outcome you need. I love you mucho, mama.

Renae, you are such I strong, sensitive soul. Rowan is blessed to have you as a mama. You are teaching him so much.

Meesa and KK and Jstar, I hope you and your families feel better very soon! January is often the sickest month for my family as well.

KK, thinking of you and your brother's anniversary.

I was just thinking today about how W is becoming a little person. When he was younger, I sort of thought of him as a being, but I didn't really get it that another PERSON had joined our family. A combo of that nice long trip to cali with just him, and the fact that he's turning 1 soon, have really got me paying attention to the little human soul that he is.


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## eccomama (Oct 6, 2005)

hi. wow this is a busy place. my life is starting to settle down, just getting over walking pneumonia, so another 3 weeks before i'm fully recovered. dd is doing good, getting over the flu also.
otherwise i think the universe just might give me a break.
hugs to all


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Eccomama, way back when before my world imploded (so like, Friday morning), I posted a number of questions I'd love you to answer, just so we can get to know you a bit more. Answer all, or none, as you please...that way we have something to tease you about later, like Meesa who is also new around here and walks on stilts with things on fire. Which is easier than raising children.
Sorry youguys are having the sickies, that indeed sucks.

Thanks FF for your words. I am now living exactly what you wrote there "I'd have a hard time waiting" because now it's exactly that for me--once you make the decision, you almost don't want to wait a day more...I have an initial consult for the procedure today, because my instincts are telling me the natural methods aren't going to work. Although, I keep plugging away until the big day. TC told me about a woman in a similar situation who talked to the baby inside her and convinced it that now just wasn't the time, and together they created a miscarriage...she told it much more eloquently but I'm trying that, too.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Just wanted to say good morning. We're off to the chiro and I'll post more at "rest time".








(oh yeah, I mentioned we had a chiro appt yesterday, huh? Haha, no, because of the holiday it is actually TODAY.







Luckily I remembered that BEFORE we drove 20 min.







)

Anyway, I seriously







you all! Talk to you later.


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Good morning, lovelies! Hope the day dawns bright and healthily for all our recovering human beans...

Els- I remember learning somewhere (book? lecture?) that pennyroyal works, but the dose needed pretty much makes you sick before it actually works. I.e., the therapeutic-toxic window is pretty small. So don't make yourself sick. I'm pm-ing you about something else, too...

Cold! here. It was 48 degrees downstairs this morning...







:

S.


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## eccomama (Oct 6, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 
Eccomama, way back when before my world imploded (so like, Friday morning), I posted a number of questions I'd love you to answer, just so we can get to know you a bit more. Answer all, or none, as you please...that way we have something to tease you about later, like Meesa who is also new around here and walks on stilts with things on fire. Which is easier than raising children.

Questions? Where are the questions? My tired mommy brain can't phantom where they might be.


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## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

Shouldn't we all answer some questions too so that the newbies know who _we_ are?

Heather, huge sigh of relief that you are home at least. I can't imagine what the last few days have been like for you - actually given your luck, I can't imagine what the last YEAR has been like for you.







Big hugs and loving support from me.







:

I think it is







: here too. There is snow on the hills and it is making me all nostalgic for the midwest. The reality is that my orange tree is just about ripe though so not too bad, eh?

Els, I am thinking of you and wishing for patience and resolution for you today. I know I would be going at bit bonkers if I were you. That said, your thoughts and your sharing of them at this time have made me love you even more and respect you immensely. You are so deeply Elsanne. And that is the biggest compliment I can think of right now.






















to all the MMF!


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

meesa, so cool about the fire stuff. One of my best fiends is a fire performer. Have you been to burningman? We have been a couple of times and loved it. I am constantly scheming on ways we can go again, but with three kids (two little ones) I don't see it happening anytime soon. I can barely care for myself out there, not sure how taking kids would work. Scary (for me). Anyway, hope you are feeling better today.

FF, I can relate to the "wow, it's not a baby, it's a PERSON" sentiment you wrote about. I had the same experience with Jett. And it's happening again as we approach his second birthday. It's still a few months off, but he just seems to be morphing into such a DUDE lately. Very few baby behavior. Lots more tearing it up toddler behavior.

Els, thinking of you all the time. Lots of love coming at ya.

Renae, I feel like maybe I own you an apology for telling you to let the shoe thing go. I noticed (rather self consciously) that no one else said anything like that. I suppose I could have offered support without going so far as to tell you exactly what you should be doing. I'm a bit of a fixer and it comes out wrong sometimes. Sorry.









We all had a long weekend and I am more than ready to send Mia off to school at 11:00. Anyone else have a hard time not feeling drained by the CONSTANT talking from their May babe. I feel bad, but it drives me seriously batty sometimes.

Speaking of, I am being called now.... mommy! mommy! mommy! mommy! mommy! mommy!







:


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mamameg* 
Anyone else have a hard time not feeling drained by the CONSTANT talking from their May babe. I feel bad, but it drives me seriously batty sometimes.











I'm a bit of an introvert, and she's a total extrovert, and really there is a running convo all day long. That and everyone in the house needing to talk to meeee and only meeee at the exact same moment. Husband included.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

So, I said I would post more at rest time...but Mama needs some rest time, too. :yawning:
Not much to report anyway, just offering love and support to those who need it, and thanks to those who were offering me the love and support the other day.









It's







:coooold







: here today, too. When we got home from the chiropractor the wind had started blowing, and now it's all grey out.
Rowan REALLY needs to take a nap, he woke up too early this morning and he and DH have their music class this evening.







: I can't even imagine what the kiddo will be like if he doesn't sleep!
Well, I won't be at the class, so it's not my problem!








I'm hoping he'll wear himself out playing for a bit, then pass out for an hour or so. I can dream, anyway.









Enjoy the rest of the afternoon, everyone.


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## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Sarah'sMama* 









I'm a bit of an introvert, and she's a total extrovert, and really there is a running convo all day long. That and everyone in the house needing to talk to meeee and only meeee at the exact same moment. Husband included.









:
I am an introvert too and perhaps the only one in my family. It is a bit crazy making!


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 
hI there eccomama! What made you choose your username? I see you are a newbie around here, bwa ha ha ha ha!!!! *rubs hands together gleefully*

here is a quote with the original questions from elsanne. i found them, oh, like 4 pages back. busy week, we've had chatting, what with events occurring the way they have.

~claudia


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

I'm in need of some support. I took Kade into the doc today. He has a double ear infection and most likely rsv. He started wheezing last night and he has had a fever of around 103 for a couple days. His cough sounds awful. He's not eating well and early this morning, he threw up all over the bed. I didn't get any sleep last night, I was waking up every 15-30 minutes checking on him.
I just need a break!

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mamameg* 
Have you been to burningman? We have been a couple of times and loved it. I am constantly scheming on ways we can go again, but with three kids (two little ones) I don't see it happening anytime soon. I can barely care for myself out there, not sure how taking kids would work. Scary (for me). Anyway, hope you are feeling better today.

Anyone else have a hard time not feeling drained by the CONSTANT talking from their May babe. I feel bad, but it drives me seriously batty sometimes.


No, I haven't been to burningman. DH has wanted to go for years, but we've never made it. We have gone to the smaller Utah burn quite a few times though...lots of fun. I don't think I could take kids with me either.

I was just thinking about the constant talking. I feel bad too, sometimes I have to tell her that mommy needs quiet time for a minute







We're also trying to teach her to wait her turn. She interrupts us a lot, especially at dinner.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Sarah'sMama* 
everyone in the house needing to talk to meeee and only meeee at the exact same moment. Husband included.











I totally feel like the center of the universe in my house. *sigh* stardom can be so droll.









Today in bellydance class (taking, not giving, thank gawds) we started to do some slow movements, which are so intense, and I started thinking about how some of them represent birth and death, and how close to those I am, and I burst into tears, in the middle of class, and rushed out. Wah. So sad, at the moment, that this is a decision I am faced with. Ugh.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *meesa143* 
I'm in need of some support. I took Kade into the doc today. He has a double ear infection and most likely rsv. He started wheezing last night and he has had a fever of around 103 for a couple days. His cough sounds awful. He's not eating well and early this morning, he threw up all over the bed. I didn't get any sleep last night, I was waking up every 15-30 minutes checking on him.
I just need a break!

We cross posted, but I wanted to extend a







to you, that is so miserable. You DO need a break. Any break possibility in your future?


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## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 
Today in bellydance class (taking, not giving, thank gawds) we started to do some slow movements, which are so intense, and I started thinking about how some of them represent birth and death, and how close to those I am, and I burst into tears, in the middle of class, and rushed out. Wah. So sad, at the moment, that this is a decision I am faced with. Ugh.

Oh Elsanne,







s

Quote:


Originally Posted by *meesa143* 
I'm in need of some support.

You totally have my support! I am so sorry it has been tough and sleepless. We just got my youngest through double ear infections with antibiotics for 50 days! Biactin was the only one that helped in the end. The very first day she went to daycare she came home with an RSV exposure note. Sick kids are unfair.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *meesa143* 
She interrupts us a lot, especially at dinner.

I don't know if this has mileage for you, but the one thing that helped us with Eleanor's interrupting was to not interrupt her and give her our eye contact when she spoke. I didn't realize it but we tended to tune her out







: and that was obviously frustrating her and causing grumpy behavior. FWIW.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *TurboClaudia* 
here is a quote with the original questions from elsanne. i found them, oh, like 4 pages back.









But wasn't there more than that? Something about how you met your partner and stuff like that? I forget, obviously.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

There WERE more. How did you meet your podner, I think...

Also, Lisa, just want to say how awesome your prev. post made me feel. I really was touched by it, thanks.


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Els and meesa! I hope whatever your ds has gets taken care of soon. I'm holding you both extra close in my heart.


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 
Wait, aren't there some terribly nosey and invasive questions we all have asked/answered along the way that we could ask of these new gals? I am so happy to have fresh blood!

Something like: how did you pick your username (got that one to ecco in prev. post, see above), how did you pick your spouse and meet him/her, what else? oh, what do you like to do in that fantasy time called "spare time", any interesting tidbits about yourself? What is something about yourself we would never guess? How old are you? etc....

found them. didn't go back far enough.









~c


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

I feel like I'm totally sneaking off to post...







:

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mamameg* 
FF, I can relate to the "wow, it's not a baby, it's a PERSON" sentiment you wrote about. I had the same experience with Jett. And it's happening again as we approach his second birthday. It's still a few months off, but he just seems to be morphing into such a DUDE lately. Very few baby behavior. Lots more tearing it up toddler behavior.

snip

We all had a long weekend and I am more than ready to send Mia off to school at 11:00. Anyone else have a hard time not feeling drained by the CONSTANT talking from their May babe. I feel bad, but it drives me seriously batty sometimes.


I'm totally right there with L (thinking that same thought this morning). I suppose it makes sense, since Jett and L are only a couple of days apart.









And Z is *totally* where Mia is at. Did I ever mention that when L's speech therapist finally met Z (she comes when he's at preschool), the whole picture became clear for her: there is literally not enough oxygen left in the room for L. One of the things we work on is taking turns speaking so she gets a chance, too.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *meesa143* 
I'm in need of some support. I took Kade into the doc today. He has a double ear infection and most likely rsv. He started wheezing last night and he has had a fever of around 103 for a couple days. His cough sounds awful. He's not eating well and early this morning, he threw up all over the bed. I didn't get any sleep last night, I was waking up every 15-30 minutes checking on him.
I just need a break!

Ug, rsv, ug ug ug. You have my sympathies. Poor little guy. (I had a night similar to yours, except mine was because poor stuffed up coughing L just wanted to nurse every 1/2 hr). Winter germs are the WORST! What do you do to take care of rsv?

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 









I totally feel like the center of the universe in my house. *sigh* stardom can be so droll.









Today in bellydance class (taking, not giving, thank gawds) we started to do some slow movements, which are so intense, and I started thinking about how some of them represent birth and death, and how close to those I am, and I burst into tears, in the middle of class, and rushed out. Wah. So sad, at the moment, that this is a decision I am faced with. Ugh.

I feel like the acrobat who's riding the bicycle, with the rest of the troupe balancing precariously on my shoulders.

I'm sorry about the intensity in class, but also glad you're able to express your feelings. Let us know when you have something scheduled.







:



A&L+1;10356163 said:


> Oh Elsanne,
> 
> 
> 
> ...


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

meesa--oh no! I'm so understanding of the need for a break and wellness.

els--*hugs* you are loved!

GI appt productive...more when I have 2 hands to type. basically, hj has a month or so to get it together and







: or a tube may be in the future. actually okay will any of the possibilities s a thriving baby is most important...


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

Continued hugs and support to elsanne.

SO glad Heath and HJ are home!







:, boy, eat!

meesa, speedy healing vibes to everyone. I know the feeling of Just. Needing. A. Break.









I'll be back to answer questions later - tribe willing.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

SO MUCH







s and support to Elsanne and Meesa.








And continued







to Heather and HJ.








A break. Like, for real, man.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Hi gals.

Well, it's done: I've taken the pills that should "bring back my period". I really want to blog this crazy thing but don't dare. The experience of being in this situation, the thing I never thought I'd do, the illegality of abortion in Mexico except for Mexico City (4 hrs away), the brave and warm woman whose midwifery career is being eclipsed by her illegal practice because she's the only resource around, her extra room in her house turned into a clinic, the visions of my son, whom I've asked to come 'round a bit later, when times are a bit more flush, the cramping in my belly.

"extemporize"? kk gets many extra credit points for using that word.

When I got pregnant with Sol, which was my intro into motherhood, I had been living with Viet for about two years, and had no intentions whatsoever of doing a family thing with this fun, bohemian, po' ass Mexican artist. It threw me into a tailspin and into the therapist's office, and threw Viet into "completely-emotionally-unavailable" land, and to call my pregnancy with Sol traumatic is just about correct. I was very, very alone and very, very sad, even though V was still in the house. I got all kinds of illnesses, and had a pretty sucky pregnancy. I still cry thinking how hard those times were for me.
Sol came, and we did the best we could, until she was about 14 mo old and we decided to live separately, which was great for both. Then Amara appeared...we lived separately for a long time, even though we were still together, until A was about a year old, little by little he began spending more and more nights, moving over more and more clothing, taking over the spare room. I was/am glad, because we're getting along and working it out.

However, I'm still paying ALL the bills and just by the hair of my chinny chin chin, as well...obviously I'm a little obsessed with this topic right now because I can't seem to stop mentioning it (at least in my head). Even though I said that money is a horrible reason to have an abortion, because the universe always provides, that is the main reason--that, and the surrounding pressure to work and be the mommy of a newborn and two others, I just can't do it. I will drown. I will be ever further from the thriving elsanne and overwhelmed by survival mode. When V and I spoke about this pregnancy, I started to senses him pull back, and away, and my GREAT NEEDINESS for all kinds of support to make it through this, and I felt that pit of despair much like with Sol's pregnancy, only made that much harder by the need to care for/provide for them, and myself, and I just can't tell you how panicky that feels. Then my boss calls and yells so much I'm sure I'm going to be fired.

I feel the need to explain myself, probably mostly to myself, but also to some of the newer girls, who may be tempted to judge (oh! we are so transparent! as I write this, I know I'm the one judging myself here...). So anyway, there it is.


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Let he who is without sin cast the first stone. (I won't be casting any stones, folks.) And mega ((((Elsanne)))). You don't need to explain. Life is complicated. Decisions are complicated. There are no easy answers. Even when we make decisions which we feel are the right direction, it doesn't mean that they are easy to carry out.

I have some understanding of your pregnancy with Sol (my pregnancy with L had some similarities... different reasons, but still difficult... so hard to be sad, conflicted, sick, and pregnant). I have some understanding of your pregnancy right now (some similarities to an earlier pregnancy... oh, how it weighs on you, oh, how it can feel like your body, your biology is your enemy and has gone against you).

I just want things to be okay with you, for the YOU (and all that orbits around you) that is here and now to be okay.

Els, you might want to check out NPR's Talk of the Nation site... today was the 35th anniversary of Roe v. Wade, and there was a program about abortion and how abortion is something that doesn't get/can't get talked about. (Try this link, date was 1/22/08, definitely read the comments of the blog thingy.)


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Jumpin in to say I'm alright...

had stomach flu and feeling like crap with a migraine. Jaz won't sleep now... took her to the chiro this morning.







the chiro. Tell more later... she was little miss sleepypoo since the appointment... now it's wide awake girl keeping me company in these hours.

I need to be







: but can't quit







: and want to be


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## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 
Well, it's done: I've taken the pills that should "bring back my period"...

As I read this whole post (not just the part quoted above) I imagined myself getting out the quilt that my great grandmother made and wrapping it around you. It was a surprising and clear image in my mind, so I feel compelled to share it with you. The quilt is blue and white only, and in my mind I can imagine the sound of it unfurling around your shoulders.


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

and then, els, you shall lay on the couch and I'll read you poetry out loud (or to myself when you want to nap) and we'll talk about our already here beautiful children and their fun and not so fun moments, what we wish for our lives, our hopes and dreams for our families... and we'll drink tea and run to the bathroom to pee whenever we need.







and









~claudia


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

And then when you are tired and drained of energy I will rub your feet and hands with yummy lotion and feed you iron-rich foods and nettle tea.

Sarah


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

And then I snug that quilt up tight and put the softest mmf! socks upon your feet and tend to the girls while you rest.


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

And then I'll start a cd of softly playing music and bring you cucumbers for your eyelids. And a pot of soup to warm your soul.


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

And when you rise from your resting, I will ladle steaming hot soup into an earthenware dish and serve it to you with a hunk of crusty bread, fresh from the oven.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Oh, wow...now you've done it, I'm bawling!

And, NOT bleeding. *sigh*


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

I will bring you chocolate, and arrange the flowers before I take the girls out so you can have some peace. I will make sure they both get naps so *you* can have a nap.


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

can I just say the mmf rock?


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## nuggetsmom (Aug 7, 2002)

And I will make sure the phone gets answered and you won't have to talk to anyone you don't want to talk to. I will keep the house warm and make cookies and take the kids out. And remind you that "those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind!" I forget who said that but I think it seems apropos.








mmf do rock


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *elsanne* 
I feel the need to explain myself, probably mostly to myself, but also to some of the newer girls, who may be tempted to judge (oh! we are so transparent! as I write this, I know I'm the one judging myself here...). So anyway, there it is.

You don't need to explain. Who am I to judge? You never know what you would do a situation unless you are actually there, imo. I hope all goes well.
My sick brain can't think of something to do for you. Oh, I would make you dinner, whatever you like









Quote:


Originally Posted by *DucetteMama21842* 
had stomach flu and feeling like crap with a migraine. Jaz won't sleep now... took her to the chiro this morning.







the chiro. Tell more later... she was little miss sleepypoo since the appointment... now it's wide awake girl keeping me company in these hours.

I hope you feel better.

K seems to be doing a little better today. No fever, but lots of wheezing and clinging to mama. He's finally napping so I can post. I'm waiting on a call from the pedi. I have lots of questions that didn't come to me until it was time to go to bed, of course. Does anyone know if it's better to use a humidifier in this case? And is there anything against us both being on antibiotics if I'm nursing? I am planning on doing probiotics, but anything else I need to do?


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

meesa, I just came on to check on you guys and lend some support. I can't see a problem with you both being on abx. sounds like you've got the probiotics covered, so that's a good thing, don't need no stinkin' yeast.

Ducette, I've been wondering where you were. I hope you're back among the living after the flu.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

meesa--hope the wheezing subsides. Is he on neb treatments? I would say maybe cut back on sugars?

C very, very glad to be back in school with her friends after being out sick. Though I suspect her friends are now sick as several weren't there today. It's so fun to ask her about her day and hear about her little buddies and who likes to play what and who is being naughty. They brought out oil pastels for them today and her teacher said she loved them! She is such an artsy craftsy kid and it's very cute.

Poor HJ slept all day so we're going to have to stop the appetite stimulant as that's the only side effect to look for and man did he get it. Poor dude. Have no idea what plan B is, but we see the ped tomorrow afternoon.

Dinner in the oven courtesy of one of DH's friends who dropped it off yesterday evening after hearing of our fun weekend.







Just cooking up some frozen veggies and calling it a meal.


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

Heather~He is not on neb treatments, that is actually one of my ??'s for the pedi. My sis had a preemie and she told me about them today. She actually still has some.

Thanks for all the support, I agree, mmf do rock!


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

Els, I missed the love parade earlier, but I'd be there to pet your hair.

Seriously, MMF, that was an amazing and beautiful scene. I felt like we were all there, I could see it so clearly. The MMF *do* rock.

Must run, kid bedtime approacheth, and hopefully I'll be back soon.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Meesa, all I know is that the antibiotics will kill all active bacteria so don't bother with probiotics until post-abx treatment...unless it's very spaced from the abx dose, and even then it's just nice for your gut until the next dose. My understanding, anyway.

Again, thank you, thank you, thank you all for your loving kindness. Think I'm going to print out this thread and remember what is happening (foot massage! meals made! hair petted! no kids' needs!)...

The saga continues....

So the RU 486 or whatever it is creates cramping, and nothing more. No blood. This morning, I call the midwife to report the lack of action and she says we should've seen something by now, take the other dose. So I do. Nasty pills dissolving in my cheeks squirrel-style, I drive to work, happy for the routine to distract me, and stop by the hospital where I had the blood test to pick up the results (I had called in for the results on Friday). I wanted the document, yk? Go by the lab, ask for results, they print them up for me, and it says:

NEGATIVO.

I flip out: WHAT?!? (thinking, I just pumped my body full of nasty anti-baby chemicals, and I'm NOT EVEN PREGNANT? Where the hell is my menses?!?)

Of course I ask WTF, and they immediately take a urine sample (ok, I gave it to them, ykwim) and it confirms POSITIVO. Re-print results, sign them, hand them to me.

/end freak out, still breathing heavily on downslope of roller coaster.

Four hours later, still no blood. Actually it's been like 10 hrs now. At the 4 hr mark, I call the midwife. I tell her the results of my internet research, after she recommends a third dose tonight: failure is due to a) 10% of people just don't respond to it, for a myriad of reasons, b) Some people take up to 2 weeks to respond, and c) It is an ectopic pregnancy. She thinks c) and next step: ultrasound on Friday.

Ectopic would make me feel better morally about this (although I'm not terribly hampered by this, there is a part of me).

*sigh*

discontentedly gestating, I think,

e


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## fiddlefern (Nov 9, 2003)

Ugh, Elsanne. This is hard enough, without crazy things like, "hey, you're not pregnant- just kidding!," and "let's take the nasty drugs with the nasty side effects but without actually working." Seriously.

When I get beamed to Mexico, I'm gonna take your girls on a long, rambling walk in the sunshine, so they come back happy but tired, and sleep well all night for you.









meesa I hope you get the answers you need re: your sick little one.

heather, that's a pretty strong reaction to the periactin. Yup, babies DO need to be awake sometimes. Sigh. I hope the ped has good ideas for you.

I got GREAT news this evening: a mama that I LOVE (and who attended W's birth), has agreed to nanny my kiddos one day a week while I start that new part of my job writing behavior plans. Woo hoo! She is so kind and sweet and strong, and I'm happy my children get to be around her (I wish _I_ could be around her one full day a week)!


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Els--the universe may not be smiling upon you, but darned if the mmf! aren't going to step in and shower you with all the loving kindness you deserve.

ferny--hooray! She sounds wonderful!

meesa--thinking of K and hoping he's having a more restful night!

Operation







: ain't going swimmingly. Trying not to fret. May be another long weekend ahead.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Oh, I can't believe I missed out on that beautiful, amazing love parade that made ME weep this morning!








I would be there with my mad reiki skills







, whispering my own story of a pregnancy that couldn't be, so that you know (and you MUST know) that you are not alone.









I don't know if I've mentioned this before, but in April 1999 I had an abortion. It's not spoken of often enough, and it is a choice every woman should have the right to make, without shame, safely, and freely.
*sigh*

Anyway, Elsanne, I will have to get more details but a friend of ours is planning a trip to Mexico in the fall for as many friends he can get to go. DH and I are hoping to have this be a "happy anniversary to us!" trip! Mexico is obviously a big country, but oh my goodness, it would be a dream come true to find a way to see you! This trip is still in SUCH early-planning stages, but more to come!









And I have to vaccuum now.







And mop. And then hie me and the kiddo to the first library story/craft hour since before Christmas! Wish me luck!










I feel so honored to be a part of this incredible, beautiful, loving group of women. Looks like I came back at just the right time.


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## Jacqueline (Jun 11, 2003)

Wow! What a wonderful parade of love! That was so beautiful. I don't know what else to add...I'd just love to be there and bask in that lovely, supportive female energy. And offer my own, of course. I'd probably also bake a batch of homemade oatmeal-chocolate chip cookies for you









I heard that Talk of the Nation on NPR as we were driving through southeastern Utah on Tuesday. Very timely. It caused dh and I to talk quite a bit about the whole issue, and, of course, our friend Elsanne! I live in a world of gray so much of the time...what you're doing is NOT an easy choice. But, neither is the other option. Making any choice consciously is the best you can do at the time and that, my friend, is exactly what you're doing.

Oh, and welcome to the new May Mamas. I was gone for a week, so I kinda missed your appearance, but welcome you to our group! I think we've been at our best this week.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

I spent a long time last night on the NPR site about abortion. It's actually amazing to me since I have shared with women my situation, how many, many of them have had abortions, and more than one, sometimes! People I wouldn't have "thought". It really is a hushed thing. NPR rocks.

fern I am psyched for you and your nanny situation, that's awesome! It is the best feeling in the world to have child care you feel good about.

kk I would just keep on with the screening process (ref oy comment) and see how it goes, sounds like it's positive, and keep fingers crossed for the other possibility, maybe place a follow up call to show your interest. I think it's a good thing, esp. if the benefits are decent.

One of these days I'm so going to get a Real Job.

Heather, I sure wish I could take away the difficulties relating to HJ's







:. Your endurance blows my mind, every single day you are doing an amazing thing.

love-loves to everybuggy. Renae, the Reiki feels great, esp. as the girls are on a long walk with Fern and crew....


----------



## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Jacqueline, we crossposted, but I very much appreciate your words and it sure is not an easy or light decision. and mmmmm







: those cookies are AWESOME!!!

Juice, I received notice of a package awaiting me downtown...could it be...??? That would be pretty darn fast!


----------



## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Keep forgetting to respond to all the things I want to respond to!

if your friend, Renae, wants to organize a trip to Mexico what I have discovered is most of your average population wants to go to the beach. We are super far from the beach, smack dab in central Mexico. Lots of people come here on vacation but it's not people looking for the Cancun type experience! Feel that out with your friend.

And of course, I'm your connection for where to stay...I would love for you and your fam to stay with me but unless they are floor-crashers I don't have room the rest of 'em! I can get them houses or whatever.


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## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

I miss Emmalola.

That said, I delight in all of you!


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Fernyfriend, that's great news about the nanny! I'm happy for you!









Els, still thinking of you, friend.









Meesa, how's today looking for your little guy?


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Els, can I ask... I thought that the blood test trumps the pee test? (I'm probably wrong, just confused.) More tea for you, and some hot out of the oven zucchini/banana muffins...









Major







to FF on the child care sitch.

Meesa, give us an update.

Jacquie, how was the trip?

(On the illness front here... I sent Z off to preschool coughing... major







, but I am so tired today from L, who slept like crap from congesting/coughing/teething, and I have two gnaw holes on each nipple... just need a break this A.M.)

Yeah, abortion... something I think those resolutely against abortion don't realize is that no woman goes into it thinking, "Whee! Goody for me!" Life *is* complicated. There *are* a lot of grays.

Re jobs... any place that is advertising any kind of a job specifies pretty clearly that one is NOT to contact them, they will do the contacting.







It's annoying, but I think places receive so many apps that they just don't want any contact with anyone... I agree that I should go through the interview process, but deep in my gut, I'm leaning somewhat against taking the job, if offered. We're not desperate yet, there are other things both of us have applied for which fit better and pay better... Also, I looked at the 2 other jobs they're advertising right now, two "exec dir" type positions (out of my area--one is PR, one is very managerial), and the pay for those is lousy, too. Sad part is that those announcements say "competitive benefits package" too while the job I'm interviewing for does not (I just looked). Not a good sign.

Hey, the rest of you have to answer the questions, or I'll feel silly.


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

K seems better today. He had a low fever last night, but slept ok. Today he seems more wheezy and grunty, but he's acting happy so I don't know what to think of it. I don't know if I ever mentioned that he spent a week in the nicu when he was born. This is the reason I stay up at night and watch him breathe. I know in my gut that he's ok, but I still worry a lot. We have such bad air quality here that I haven't taken him anywhere since we went to the doc.

Els~I hope you can get this worked out soon. There is nothing worse than waiting.

kk~Good luck on the job situation.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Actually, I don't think grunty is good--might be wrong, but I thought that was a sign of trouble breathing or at least working harder to breath? Hope the virus is clearing out. RSV is certainly enough fun for any winter!

Went to the ped and utter craziness was that she said that his hosp. report said nothing about meningitis! wtf? The one ped so very clearly said that was the diagnosis. But then again she's the b*tch who retracted him when I wasn't there so who knows. So supposedly then he was so very sick just from the (aspiration) pneumonia??

Our EI eval for him got moved up to tomorrow morning! yay! well, not Yay! but will be good to have a complete eval and some answers.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Oh heavens, Heath. WTH???? Will the treatment change, or is he out of the woods, regardless?

Still no action here. Ultrasound tomorrow. KK, as I understand it, the woman on the phone spoke the actual blood test results (positive), but somehow it got written down as negative (they think she was multitasking), and the pee confirmed it as positive. That's my understanding.


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

Sorry, I should have explained better. He's a grunty kid, that's how he tells you he's mad/upset. It's more like a growl actually.

What a difference an afternoon makes! We went down for a nap, woke up an hour and a half later and he is SO much better! He's playing and laughing, not coughing too much. I feel tons better too, I was just telling dh how I can bend over and not feel like my head is going to explode


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

phew, meesa! Glad the grunting is a good thing!

3am party here is winding down....


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

Heather and elsanne, I'd like to believe that you have already met your quota of medical issues for the year, so the rest of the year should be smooth sailing









I'm taking the clan up to Michigan this afternoon to see my sister and her new babe







so this morning is all about cleaning and packing before I pick the girlies up at 1:00. The bummer is that we just don't know when DH can get out of work, so we just kind of have to wait until he gets home, which makes it kind of hard to plan. I'd love to be on the road by 1:30 (ha, ha, ha!) as it's about a four-hour drive. More likely scenario - on the road by 4:00.

I wanna applaud KK for answering the questions, and join in!

Username: Juice was actually a high school nickname, which I didn't like at first but which stuck like glue. From the time my BFF dubbed me, it was about two weeks before every single person I knew was calling me Juice. Teachers and family included. Tried to ditch it when I went to college (all grown up now, you know) and it didn't work. Tried again when I went to Chiro College, again no go. Gave up and embraced my inner Juice.

Met DH in college. To say we didn't get along would be an understatement! I was dating someone else at the time, who fortunately graduated. During that time I walked into a building at some insane hour of the night and saw DH sitting at a table reading, and the thought came crashing down like a ton of bricks on my head: "I am going to end up marrying that guy". Did I mention we didn't get along? We didn't start dating until probably a year after that thought, and we didn't get along for another six months or so. I think we spent the first six months of our relationship learning to communicate with each other, and it seems to have paid off because 13 years and 3 kids have happened since then!

Spare time? I'm a wannabe gardener, with a serious black thumb. I like to knit, and read, neither of which I do as much as I'd like. Tidbits? I have a third nipple, and it lactates







(TMI?) I love The Simpsons.

The Path to Mamahood - I always wanted to have kids. Caitlyn came along a couple of years before we were "planning" - I got pregnant just three months after opening my very own brand new chiropractic practice. Worked out well, though, because I now have a practice full of people who have watched me go through three pregnancies, and who know that sometimes my kids are sick and that my practice is closed on snow days.

I have a question I'd like to add (because this isn't long enough!!) How many kids do we each have, and what are their ages? Some of us have them in our sigs, but otherwise I'm still pretty vague. I have two girls, ages six and three and a half, and a boy, almost 18 months.

Sorry for the novel! Can you tell I don't *want* to go clean and pack and get ready to go?







:


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

I don't have much time to type, darn it; Rowan and I are headed to my friend M.'s for our weekly childcare swap, I am going a bit earlier than usual because I need to get back to our house by 2pm to meet my MIL, who will then be taking Rowan to their house for the weekend.
This calls for some smilies:





















:














:















:














:
















Ahem.







: Sorry, but this weekend has been LONG in coming. Rowan's so excited about it, we marked it on the calendar!







So everyone is down for it. Heh.

But besides that, still a busy day for me, with the swap this morning, then dropping by here to send Rowan off with Gramma, and then back out to the nanny gig. DH and I are going out to a nice dinner tonight though.







It should be a good weekend. I may not be online much.









I send all my love and good energy to Elsanne, Heather, Meesa, all my lovely MMF!









I hope you have a peaceful weekend.


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

Juice~Saige came along 3 years before I was *ready* My plan was to graduate college first, but I guess someone had other plans. I am a walking example of the saying "it only takes one time of not using protection" My college plans are on hold at the moment. It kinda sucks because I had just started the honors program and everything. It turned out to be a good thing though. I'm doing what I was going to get a bachelors in, and it doesn't pay anything, so I've decided to change majors and go into surgical nursing instead.

My kids are 3(almost 4) and 8 months.

Mama Faery~I'm totally jealous! Have a good time


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

juice: i'm laughing about the you and dh not getting along thing.







: read further for more explanation.

username: Turbo is our cat. he's a black-and-white-tuxedo-cat-who-thinks-he's-a-dog-sometimes-but-is-now-getting-old. our guesstimate is that he is now 15-ish years old. we adopted him a couple of months after we moved to the portland area (from new york and pennsylvania, respectively) and the vet guessed he was about 4-5 years old at that time. he was my first "baby" but is sadly neglected much of the time now. he loves to sleep on marek's bed or our bed when marek pushes him off.

partner meeting: bill is my complement. we've known each other 13 years now, and we've been "together" for 12.5 years. we met through a mutual friend who i met via the internets and he went to college with.

babe crying... will finish later...

~claudia


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

I forget all the questions, but ...

DH and I met on a blind date 6 years ago today!! Have a babysitter tonight and we're going out to eat and maybe walk around the mall. HJ is invited along as he won't/can't have a bottle.

EI eval today. Qualified w/ no problem. So yay and not yay at the same time. E was such a character when they were here and kept everyone entertained. The one evaluator confirmed that she has the language skills of a 4yo! You're not kidding! She talks circles around us now---can't wait til she is 4....I'm in for it!

Sherri!!





























:























(okay smilie art....I don't know how you do it...that took me 3 minutes! )


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Heather, I commented on your blog, but again...so glad you finally are being listened to by SOMEone, and not so glad for the issues. wow.

I am not doing so well today. Just, sort of, tuckered out with all this biz. Viet is being weird, his way of dealing with it, but it surely isn't "gee, honey, bet this is kind of hard, is there anything I can do?".
I had an u/s to confirm little sac, indeed, there, implanted in uterus. No detachment whatsoever despite two doses of misowhatever it is. 5 w 5 d. Since I thought, maybe he's hangin' on because he really IS supposed to be born, I asked the m/w what the repercussions were of those two doses, she said they definitely cause defects. It could also be that it's not viable anymore but can't tell so early on. I am still decided, but wanted to know my options, you know, just in case. Just in case I want to go live off of welfare while I look for a job in the States with no partner and settle for daycare I'm not thrilled about, in a center, for my newborn baby and two others, what are their names again? I'm too stressed out, overwhelmed, and un-elsanne to remember.

SUCH A SUCKY THING TO HAVE TO DO I could just spit at Viet and his libido. Who went to the ultrasound alone? me. Who paid for it? me. Whose decision will it be whether I a) have an aspiration now, or b) wait another week for the m/w to receive more pills, and see if they work?

Who is so distracted by this situation that she missed an important work appointment today representing about $40 very important dollars? me. Who cancelled another appointment this afternoon to take on a new house because I just can't work harder than I am and also deal with this shit? me.

What is Viet doing? Who the f knows.

When will a-hole boss finally deposit money in my account? See above.

When will my wonderful wife be paid for the week? When I scrounge the money on Sunday organizing a dance class.

I give up. I give up!


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Just







Elsanne. It's a hard enough decision to make, and once it's been made, dammit, you just want it done already. I wish I could be there to hold your hand and go with you to your appointment. I know any one of us would have dropped everything to do that for you. I wish you peace and I wish you support from Viet.


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

have a great time ttonight heather! oht, katie in my lap


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

els:







s it's not much, i know, so i feel lame. but i really, really do mean it. should we do another lovefest thing again? marek is trying to convince me to go outside and play with him in the 40 degree weather so maybe you can just go back a page and read it again...???

to finish the answering of my questions:

partner: so bill. mutual friend introduced us. i thought bill was very full of himself. we argued. he annoyed me. then bill and mutual friend (george) shared a house while doing summer school and work that summer up in ithaca. bill continued to annoy me. he went off to sulk. i felt bad. and intrigued. and sad that i had made him sulky. later that evening, i apologized to him. the next day, our mutual friend george slept until like 2 pm, which was usual for him, but boring for us all wanting to do something. so we jumped on his bed and attacked him and blankets and pillows got thrown around and there was some wrestling and whatnot and bill and i ended up underneath a pillow together, breathing hard. i drove back to boston later that afternoon, and when i called to let them know i got home safely, bill and i talked a while. then the next day we talked again. and discovered that while we were breathing hard under the pillow together, we both had an inclination to kiss the other person which neither of us acted upon. our phone bill that month (and i think every month until we moved to oregon together 2 years later) was huge. hmmm... i haven't thought about that time for a long while. it's nice to remember.

we have two boys: my mmf but actually a june baby Marek, and 16 month old Stefan. we also have two sadly emotionally neglected but well fed cats: Turbo and Jorja.

ummm... what else were we supposed to answer? i forget. will look later.

oh, and remember when we shared if we could rename ourselves and choose a hippie-dippie name what it would be? i never shared though i always intended to. mine would be Lakshmi Bali. lakshmi because it means prosperity and i've always liked the sound of it, and bali because i want to go there.

~claudia


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Els, still thinking of you. The aspiration requires a trip to MC, no? Ack on that and all it would entail. I'm ready to give Viet another kick to the balls.

Heath,







on the date. We did some dates with Z when he was small, because he never ever took a bottle. I hear you on the yea/not yea EI thing







. But E sounds very cute.








Renae, have FUN!!!

I think it's funny that I can't think of a hippie name for the life of me (because despite outward appearances, I'm really a square). I have a 3rd nipple too, but it doesn't lactate.

I have to share my afternoon fun... Remember last spring, the women's retreat at church which I was uninvited from (because I was going to have to bring L or wean her)? There's a bulldog church lady who's held a major grudge against me since then, apparently. The topic of child care for an unrelated event came up at a meeting I was at Tues. night, and apparently, she's been stewing. I got a (snail mail) letter from her today full of vitriol and wackiness. Reading it made me both angry and scared, but the residual feeling is pity (well, and some fear). She cc'ed the minister (who's leaving for a trip this weekend, and I don't think will be available to do anything till she gets back). Nice, eh?







I'm not sure what to do... I left a message for the minister (oh lucky her!), and if she can't intervene between now and Sunday morning (where I might see her, don't want a confrontation), I think I might have to call the pres. of the board of trustees. (Maybe I'll take this to the spirituality subforum...) I basically want someone to call her off ("You are not to talk to/send crazy letters to KK until we talk you off the ledge..").


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

I'm so sorry elsanne, maybe we should all stand in a line to kick him in the balls. I probably don't know you well enough to say that









Today has been filled with disinfecting my house. I do not want to get sick again.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Thank you all for the ball-kicking woman power and energy. You all rock my world, individually and collectively.

Because I'm sick of my own sh!t, kk, I think that woman is WEIRD and you should keep that letter and show it to, I dunno, SOMEone. That's just weird. What does she want from you?

LOVE the Lakshmi Bali.

I would be, "Gaia". Mother Earth. I am mega-mother-earthy.

Heather, how did the date go? How is HJ's







:?


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

i'm back in civilization but have neglected the boys long enough to read and catch up......so i'll have to respond later. i was thinking about you all a LOT this week


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

the two boys are *gasp* sleeping so i'm back.

it sounds like we aren't the only ones with the sickies. i think ebin was having some super sinus pressure and both boys developed super runny noses when we got up to the mountains. my mom has the horrible sinus pressure which makes me think that might have been ebin's problem because he had never ever been that fussy in his entire life. waking every 15 minutes for most of the night and crying while not wanting to nurse? check. i have insane black circles under my eyes as this was his plan for several nights in a row. oh mah gawd nelly. i feel like my last nerve is frazzled and broken. last night i couldn't cope and well...i hid under a pillow vowing to make that v appt for a v-day present in between getting up to pat him. and then he slept in manageable 2-3 hr blocks THANKFULLY

on the upside....the snow was wonderful and isaac *loved* it. he didn't want to sit on a sled at all but loved tromping around and climbing up snow banks and refusing to come inside. he did not like walking into the path of my dad's snowblower







i snowboarded for a day and a half with my dad and the powder was great. i am totally getting old and developing a fear of chairlifts though. *shudder* i was having my doubts about getting to go boarding at all because the first part of the vacation was fraught with separation anxiety on ebin's part. he warmed up to my mom and was fine while i was gone. and he'll even sit on my dad's lap now. (i never had this phenom with isaac the daycare baby!) we did the looong drive back to bakersfield today

the highway between us and our flight home (out of burbank) keeps closing with this giant snow storm. we should be ok because the next storm will be warmer. fingers crossed -- we will be really ready to get home on sunday! it hasn't been an overly relaxing vacation with the mega lack of sleep. but my mom sure is a kick-ass caretaker in the feeding department. i haven't cooked or touched a dish in a week and a half. the woman is tireless. perhaps this is the root of my inability to be the same? i can appreciate now how pampered i am

ok enough about me









i'm so glad to hear HJ is home - i was thinking of you all week. i hope he can







: and it sounds like you're keeping such a good eye on him. i am reallly sending "less stress in this arena please" vibes. can you feel them??

elsanne - i feel like saying 'oh honey' and hugging you. what are the chances? as i read along my thoughts were that i hoped you had access to ru-486. that's the way i would want to go. and then 'oh good she did' and then 'oh carp!' how unfair! (well, all of it). i'd bring you a beautiful paper journal to pour your heart onto...now or later. and i'm sorry viet is pulling back and leaving you to deal alone. le sigh.

renae - i'm glad you get a little weekend break. i get in the powerstruggle loop with isaac too. he's sooooo tough sometimes. i also think 'hey next to the shoe cubby is as good as the shoe cubby' but i realise it wasn't about the shoes. it was about antagonizing his mother right?? that last nerve thing? it sounds like things have been a lot better since then. isaac has been pretty feisty like that a lot on this trip and my mom has said many times that if i didn't DO something that she would. half the time i don't know what to do to get him under control! (us under control). le sigh again.

half of isaac's problem on this trip has stemmed from the fact that he does NOT POOP! daily miralax doesn't work. i'd be a cranky little ___ too. i finally resorted to laxative 2 days in a row and i honestly can't believe how much he was storing up. clean up to his tonsils as my mom said. she said it is sooo much worse than the point at which my pediatrician hospitalized me. i suppose i need to talk to my ped about it again.

fiddle- that's awesome about your friend nannying! seeing ebin freak about strangers on this trip has given me a renewed appreciation for his happy little bond with his nanny.

KK - that is scary and weird to get a letter like that! eeek. i wouldn't know what to do either but i know i'd feel wierd even though it is clearly that she is overstepping a boundary there.

i think i'm too tired for questions. abbreviated versions!

username: you know how jennifer lopez goes by jlo? well jstar is the jlo version of my name.

dh: i worked at an oil company during my college vacations. dh was the hottie mail boy *swoon* it was a summer fling that has now gone on for 12 1/2 years









hobbies: snowboarding, sewing, camping, gardening, knitting, shopping







: not enough travelling these days. um, am i the only one grooving on celebrity rehab??? mega







:

my kids are 3 and almost 8 months (meesa -- is your 2nd babe a may babe? ebin was born june 1st)

ok off to check oy


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

kk: that woman is weird. and that letter should be shown to your minister as well as any other powers that be at church. isn't there a hathor about something like this?

els: continuing hugs from up norte...

jstar: welcome back from the mountains! separation anxiety babes are no fun. sickie babes are also no fun. when you are back in the pdx land, we MUST do play time for kiddos and mama catch up time for us.

heath: i said this on the bloggity, but i think you are amazing. truly. awe-inspiringly amazing. just reminding ya. and for hj:







:

oh, and more answers to questions:

hobbies: ummm... mdc? i'm not a big hobby sort. i like birth and doula and midwifery stuff and i read a lot (or maybe i used to read a lot...???) of books about them. now i mostly skim. i'm a doula, but not currently doing any work because being mama takes up most of my time.

some secret you wouldn't know about me if i didn't tell you: ummm... hmmm... well... i can't think of one right now. ask me again tomorrow. or next week. or in february.









~claudia


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

date was fun! HJ was awake and chatty most of the time which was adorable. DH and I had the omg we need to do this more often revelation. Girls were ecstatic to have time w/ the babysitter.

Els---I'm waiting in line w/ my heavy keen sandals on. A hard rubber-soled kick to the nads to get my message across... But for you my dear, I share a dose of my resilience and calm in the face of medical schtuff. And lots o' hugs.


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

:














:








heath said nads.







:














:


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *TurboClaudia* 







:














:








heath said nads.







:














:

















:














:








Claudia said nads too!







:














:









That church lady is bizarre, KK. Maybe you could send the prairie dogs after her?









Glad you had a good time, Heather! Dh and I went out to see a hockey game last night, and it was so nice. So relaxing. So full of adults. And my girls are in love with our sitter as well, so it was a win-win!

jstar-thanks for checking in! I thought you were home by now, but I am glad you said hello! Sorry to hear about the travelling woes.









Renae, I know you're not checking in







bom chicka bow bow but hope you are enjoying your weekend

Els, mama, friend, how is today going? I made a cup of coffee for you.


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Heath and Claudia said nads AND Sherri said "boom chicka bow bow" !!















:

Oh my.

Els, I've got my huge clod-hopper hospital Dankos on right now. So Viet better watch out. I wish I could be there to doula you through this experience...

Heath - so glad date went well. Those eves help so much!

jstar - your vacay sounds exhausting, dear.

KK - WTF? I hate it when people get all crazy out of left field. It is scary. Good luck with that icky sitch.

Questions...um...username? MC Sarah B in the hizzy. I've had that online name forevah, since like the beginning of the internets.

DH meeting: we've known each other since 5th grade, started dating in 10th, broke up briefly right after high school, back together the next year and he followed me to college on the west coast, married the summer after college graduation.

Kids: I'm one of those I've-wanted-kids-since-I-was-18 people. I mean, my uterus has. Like I would get serious uterine cramping if I saw a cute baby. Knew I didn't really want a kid until after my first stint in grad school, and when I quit that I convinced DH that the time was now.

Oop, gotta run, more later.


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

jstar~Yes, my 2nd is a May babe. It sounds like we have a lot in common. I am totally jealous you got to go snowboarding. I haven't been at all this year.
Saige has the same problem. Daily miralax doesn't work for her either. Neither does laxatives or those awful suppositories(sp?) We had to give her an enema last night







: Hers seems to be worse when she drinks cows milk.







:








about the nads...

Heather~Glad your date was fun. Sending







: vibes

This morning I'm working, or supposed to be


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

jstar--what worked for e....~2oz of pumped milk! First time I stirred it into a smoothie and the other day she drank it straight up.


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

maybe i'll try the pumped milk. hadn't thought about that.

meesa - i feel like i have hardly boarded at all in YEARS. zero days last year for being pregnant and i think only 2 days and 4 or 5 days the 2 years before that. and we used to go almost every weekend in our former lives. i feel so old and washed up now! also - when i was a kid they hospitalized me around 2 or 3 years old for constipation and took me off milk completely. i'll have some terrible osteoporosis when i get old i'm sure. so you're probably right that milk makes it worse for saige. i think it does for isaac too.

ok i have to visit as many people as possible today. thankfully ebin slept 'normally' last night. it figures he'd get the whole sleeping away from home thing sorted out the night before we leave
















annnnnnnd i just talked to doug for the first time in a week. he's in new jersey. yay!

claudia - i want to do playtime too! see ya soon


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## emmalola (Apr 25, 2004)

Hi friends...









I have to say I'm embarrassed. My head has been so far up my own butt lately I've missed out on being a good friend to others. I'm overwhelmed and crazy and totally self-absorbed right now and I wish I could say things were going to change soon. I haven't even logged on to MDC for the whole month of January, if that's any indication of the nutsyness that is my life.

But I will belatedly join the love parade and offer to be the person who runs to starbucks when everyone else needs a coffee. and I am sending kind thoughts and prayers to all my may mommas. And I have some pretty good kicking boots when that line starts up. nads.

thinking of everyone.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mcsarahb* 
Heath and Claudia said nads AND Sherri said "boom chicka bow bow" !!















:

Oh my.









Oh my goodness!








Hehehehehe....nads.








And the bom chicka BOW BOW happened LAST NIGHT, thank you very much!









Yeah, I say "I'm off for the weekend!" But then I cannot resist checking in on my May Mamas.

KK, wow, what a freak. Sorry if that's out of line but it gets my knickers in a twist to read stuff like that. I hope things get smoothed out a bit!
Heather, happy anniversary, hope you had fun! And







: vibes to HJ!





















Elsanne. I







you, lady. I wish I could be there with you...

Oh, the shoe thing.







Yes, it wasn't about the damn shoes. It was the fact that the kid had been doing things like that not all DAY, but all freakin' WEEK! So yeah, I was on my last nerve. Things have definitely improved since. And not just because Rowan went to Gramma's!







This whole week we were pretty okay. Some talking-to, a smack or two (he smacked ME *sigh*--but at least it wasn't in the face!) and maybe a tantrum...but yeah, nothing like last Saturday. So we're existing. We'll come out of this glitch, and then we'll run right into another. Haha. Such is life.
Megan, it's so totally okay, hon. No apologies.







I was upset at the time, but you know, I understand about the fixing things, I really do. I'm not mad at ALL.

Okay, back to not being on the internet. But first, borrow jstar's abbreviated versions of the Questions:
Username: I am a mama, and I used to wear wings. In public. And I have faery wings tattooed on my back. I'm a Mama Faery. *grin*

DH: I moved to MA from CA to follow my high school sweetheart, who went to a tech school out here. He made a bunch of friends, with whom I was introduced. One in particular caught my eye, and after a good year or so of him asking (bugging) me to take him out to clubs I had been going to, I did. We became fast friends, then best friends, and then we fell in love. Relationship with BF I moved out to be with had been fizzling, then it ended, then future-DH and I got almost instantly together. It's not as bad as it sounds!







:
We've been together for almost 10 years, married for almost 7. It's been a wild, and beautiful ride.

Pets: We have a fish, and my first "child" is our big fuzzy black cat named Julio. Who is also Monsieur Chat! our inspiration and sometime PITA.









Hobbies: I am so into music it's not even funny. I go to shows and go dancing when I can, make Mix CD's and...and I sing karaoke.







: I also read as much as I can, crochet, and make jewelry. I also love standup comedy and rent defunct TV shows from Netflix to watch with DH.
Oh god, jstar, I just have to say that I LOVE DR. DREW!!!







I don't have cable so I don't really get to watch Celeb Rehab much, but AFI and Blaqk Audio have been on Loveline so very much that Dr. Drew grew on me. Hehe.

Kids: I have the one and only Rowan, born May 26 of '04. He is a Mr. Poopypants and brilliant and funny and adorable and I love him dearly.








Okay, all done with the internets! I'll be back to tell you all about our weekend when it's over. Our weekend of um, hanging out on the couch and eating pizza rolls!







We may go to a movie in a bit...if we can decide what to see!


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## emmalola (Apr 25, 2004)

oh- questions...

username: my old nom de plume when I wrote a 'zine back before in the internet was emmalola. so here I am.

sweets: we met through a mutual friend when we were both living in the Bay Area. had a lot of fun and when I went to nursing school across the country he found a way to also go to the same school the following year. It was a good, sweet, honest love affair so when he asked me to marry him I was more than ready. we're good together.

pets: we have a dog named Biscuit who alternates between being a sweet addition to our family and being a total hazard to our children and sanity. today she's a sweetie.

hobbies: i like making things. right now I'm working on a painting/collage. i also scrapbook, knit, sew, bead, make cards, and generally do whatever I set my mind to. I went skiing last weekend after a 21 year hiatus and loved it and have been pining to climb the mountain again ever since. I love endurance cycling, but haven't been able to do that seriously since I left the bay area 8 years ago. I also love running, but babies seem to have taken a toll on my knees and my ability to train so that's been on the back burner. waaaaay back burner. and then there's that dissertation, which should be my main focus but feels a lot like a hobby I can't get away from.

kids: two- the lentil and the peanut. my little legumes. you can see their dates of birth in my siggy.

off to make my husband happy, an almost impossible feat today.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

EL, sooo glad to see you back here!

Love rereading everyone's stuff.

Things are looking up here after a very icy morning where Viet and I avoided eye contact at all costs. Finally I stood in front of him and said, so, what's up? etc... and we were able to have a talk. At least now, I am relaxing just a teensy bit and I have some angels out there who have made sure we have groceries, and gas in the house, and in the car, and that my phone is working...








Also today I had an unexpected reprieve in the business of life when a class I had to teach was cancelled (an exchange with my chiro, so no money loss) and the girls were already at the sitter's, so I came home and had several hours to myself here in my house. Very essential for sanity.

I have to tell you something Viet said yesterday, last night, that is so insensitive it's FUNNY if you can find it in yourself to see the humor (which I could do, with some time and distance). He said, "Can the woman do the aspiration tomorrow? It's horrible having you like this."









My response:
"oh, it's horrible having me like this? Can you imagine then what it's like to be actually LIVING it? And sure, she can do the procedure tomorrow, except that she'd like to be paid for it. Have you done anything about trying to get money? Called anyone?"

But I can't tell you what a difference your support has made, your shoes all lined up to ensure Viet no longer engenders progeny. I have a few friends irl, my family, and youguys--especially youguys--that have really witnessed the whole deal. I actually am getting a lot out of writing it out. I don't keep a journal anymore, like the pre-children days, so this is it.


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## eccomama (Oct 6, 2005)

username: my hippie, tree hugging roots









sweets: none at the moment. I'm happily divorced since 12/06, just started to date a little but enjoying flying solo

pets; none. because of all the moving around, divorce, etc i lost my kitty and my dog.









hobbies: not much between working full time and having my daughter a lot of my free time. i enjoy the outdoors, browsing online message boards, reading book and magazines. trying to get back into shape so i'm starting to run and bike as weather permits.

kid: my almost 4 year old spirited, co sleeping, book loving, curious, organic girl


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## fiddlefern (Nov 9, 2003)

Oh my, Sherri. Thank you for the laugh! Even now, 20 minutes after reading the post, all I have to do is think, "bom chicka bow wow," and I am gone again. I really needed that. whew. (wipes tears from cheeks).

KK, church tomorrow is gonna be akward. I'd be tempted to skip, but that would only encourage her.

Wow, Els, what V said was unbelievably insensitive.

HF, you are often in my thoughts. I am really hoping things turn around for HJ. Maybe the EI people will have a good feeding therapist for you (EI in my area didn't really have feeding therapists, so we had to go through health insurance.) I was thinkin about what the therapists said about E, and I realized something. Your kids all seem to require intense amounts of energy as babies, but it is so worth it, because they are these amazing, brilliant kiddos, who are going to grow up into adults who bring so much to the world. They are talented and they know they are loved, and they are going to make the world a better place. Because of that you have given them, they will have a lot to give.

Emmalola- I think not logging on to MDC for a month is a very appropriate response to what has been going on in your life! One can only juggle so many balls.

TC and others- I'm lovin the answers to the questions, because although we've answered some of them before, I'm hearing different details this time.









jstar, what a bummer about the sleepies.

Questions:
fiddlefern- i play the violin. i like ferns. what can I say. (majored in bio with an emphasis on microbial ecology, i like forest-type-stuff)

dh- met him at work. fought a ton while we were dating. barely fight at all now, though i do badger him and he bristles back sometimes.

pets- a cat, neglected like tc's.

sorry for the lack of deets, I'm gettin tired. think I'd better hit the hay. Dh had both kids by himself for 25 hours while I went to work, so he's snoring away on the couch. I promised I'd get up with both kids tonight so he can experience the kind of delicious night's sleep I got last night at work. yes, i get more sleep at work than at home.









Toodles!


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

I'll post more later.










I'm stealing myself a new senior title courtesy of FF.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Sherri, the cup of coffee you made for me is nectar. Thank you.

I'm reading this book that Juice sent to me, called Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert....it is so great...highly recommend it. It's really helping me with this situation in terms of pulling my head out of my arse and rising above. Or, just diving into my book and forgetting about things for a while. She's my age and she writes really cleverly, highly entertaining book about her search for herself and god and the best gelato and everything.

Today I am totally dragging. Yesterday I had some nausea, and strangely it was a gift to feel "pregnant" again even though the outcome will not be the big prize of mon bebe. I really go up and down about this whole thing, swinging wildly. I have a workshop today and had several cancellations which irks me...need these girls to take more responsibility durnit, they did not pre-pay (my fault) and today they're cancelling. *sigh* It will all be fine, it's just annoying.


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Morning, all. I've been on call since Thursday night at 8 pm, and am tired. Did get a full night's sleep last night, but it was restless and full of dreams about my pager going off. Sigh. Caught a baby, though, on Friday morning!

Elsanne, hope the talk with Viet has positive long-term consequences. We are all thinking of you.

EL, glad to see you around again. No apologies for your absence. The funding thing is a PITA and I hope it is resolved soon. I feel for you.

More details to fill in on the questions:

So, the kids thing. I have always wanted 2 kids. I had my May '04 babe and her infancy, through the first year or so, was really, really hard on me and DH. Her first 2-3 mos. of breastfeeding were miserable; she was a horrible sleeper, and we struggled with sleep issues. So now my uterus and heart are wanting another one, but DH is completely against it and my brain is against it, too. It's just hard to let go of my original plan. Even if we did do it again, it wouldn't be for a couple of years, until I get out of school and established in a job. I waffle back and forth a lot. There was a long period where I was sure I didn't want another, but now the desire is creeping back. It probably won't happen, though. DH is plotting his vasectomy.

Hobbies: none. Don't have time with school and kiddo. Before all that I liked crafty things, jewelry-making, sewing, knitting and crocheting. Liked walking and hiking, nothing too extreme, just day hikes around this beautiful area (Oregon). Read a lot of books. I like food and cooking and baking. We have had a puny garden the last couple of years and plan to really kick into full gear with that next year, once I am out of school. Oh, and we have a 100+-year-old house that DH works on constantly. We've done a lot of work and have a lot left to do.

For those of you who are new, I am in my last year of a 3-year nurse-midwifery program. It is way more than full time and pretty intense. I started it when Lily was 14 mos. I love it, though, and am more and more sure that it is the right path for me. Hoping to finish in June, definitely sometime this summer.

Pets: One very, very neglected cat named Joe. He is the world's most annoying cat and has been outdoor-only since Lily was about a month old.

Ok, off to hang with the fam. Going to the science museum to see an IMAX film today! Hope the 3.5-yo can last through the whole thing.









S.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

ff---you and making me teary at 4am (when I orig. read your words!) !! Thank you. lol at getting better sleep at work--sounds good to me!

I'm still flaking on remembering the appropriate questions...

username: used to hate this nickname, but the little girl I was nannying for at the time I joined used to call me it and it sounded much cuter and less annoying coming from her! And now that it has morphed into being the mama of a tribe of little feathers, it's really stuck!

dh: as I mentioned, we met on a blind date 6 years ago set up by a mutual friend after I ran into him randomly on the street and was complaining about dating woes. See...sometimes complaining is a good thing! He said I should meet his friend <insert goofy nickname here> and I almost said no!

kids: 3rd and final babe for us arrived in October. I always thought I wanted four, but as ff observed my little ones sure do take lots of mothering in their early years it seems. My may babe is the oldest and 20.5 months spacing in between the others. Crazy busy, crazy tired, sometimes just crazy







, but life is good

hobbies: knitting, crocheting, long walks, photography, travel (must do this more!), artsy movies (it's been a while!) and reading.

pets: one much adored kitty who is currently a pissycat owing to kidney failure....still sorting out how to give her subcutaneous fluids for that without getting mauled. She claims ownership of any sunny spot in the house. Would love to get a big dog, but not until everyone in the house can wipe their own butt.









So we finally all 5 of us made it to church today! Great sermon which garnered a standing ovation for the minister....guess you'd have to be UU and appreciate the social justice topic to understand how powerful that was. There were two other wee baby boys around HJ's age being waltzed around the social hall and that was neat!

okay...enough dilly dallying....costco beckons! take that vegan nuns!


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## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

: EL came to visit! I am sorry that things have been so overwhelming and tough for you recently. I got caught up a bit on your blog and if it helps at all, I sent out our New Year's cards last week. AND there are about 4-5 presents still to be packed up and sent. We all have an overwhelming life.









I am liking the review of the questions. Me:

Username: A&L+1 - A for Alison







and L for me, Lisa. +1 because I was TTC when I came to MDC and it seemed to make sense at the time. Now it annoys me that I have a username that is basically three people (A, L, and E) when it's just ME posting *and* we're +2 now anyway. I want a new username but I think that it is vain or something to pay the money to change it. I shall never reach 1000 posts.

DP: Met my partner at Girl Scout Camp. I was Outdoor Specialist and she was Assistant Camp Director. We were friends for three years then decided that we were each others true love in 1999 and had a wedding in 2002.

Pets: a cat, Xu (pronounced Zoo) and a box turtle, Sophie. Xu is stupid and getting old, but I love him (He's beautiful too, a snowshoe siamese manx). The turtle lives in the side yard and eats the worms from the worm bin and veggies that are too good for composting. She is a reptile and as such not at all pet-like. I rarely see her.

Kids: Two girls, one that made me a MMF and the other will be a one-year-old on Friday (!), making mine an all-girl household. Odd, but there it is.

Hobbies: I plan to quit my job and become a midwife. My official hobby is fretting about this. I wish my hobby was sleeping. I WOH full-time so I spend the majority of my (free)time just being with my family. I enjoy quilting. I want to learn to knit. I am trained to be a birth doula but being a working mom does not fit with that quite yet. I read A LOT.

Okay, there's a lot more that I wanted to write about...I'll leave it for now with extra hugs for Elsanne. And my fingers are crossed that everything went okay with KK and the strange-letter woman today.


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Ug on cancellations, Els. (Hey, once you get *your* head out of *your* arse, will you help me with mine?) And actually, I think *Viet's* head is probably pretty far up somewhere dark and tight. He really doesn't have a clue, does he? Gah, I can't believe how differently fathers come at things than mothers (I know not universally true for all fathers, all mothers, but generally, different approaches).

Loved what FF said about Heath's kids.









EL: I've been wondering how you've been doing (empathize with the diss thing)... so good to hear from you, don't worry about absences. FF nailed that one, too: you do what you can do. You have a lot going on. I'm hoping the universe cuts *you* some slack, too (at the very least, on the appliance front).

Pets: none here, though I've resurrected our worm bin (does that count?).

Kids: Was pretty sure I wasn't going to have kids, then my developmentally disabled brother (whom I expected to care for through our adulthoods) died, and that changed (long story). Why do I have 3 kids? In part because being a de facto only now sucks, and in some ways, I feel like I have a "spare."









Didn't skip church; she tends to go to late service, we go to early. Didn't linger for coffee, though. Her adult daughter died of cancer last spring, and I think that some of what is going on is that her head is seriously askew. Still, I don't want to have any encounters with her till a kind person of authority (ie, the minister or pres of the bd of trustees) can calm her down.

I think I mentioned that I've been decluttering. I was tidying up the carport yesterday, trying to organize all the stuff for the ARC pick-up, and I stumbled upon a garment bag. It's been there for a while, I thought it full of stuff that dh was getting rid of (he thought the same about me). It was full of very nice women's work clothes, in my size. Then I remembered that a few months back, a friend of mine (who's gained weight due to stress, kids, etc) told me she'd drop things off for me, then never mentioned it again. It was her! Yes, of course, I cried. Very kind of her...







:


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Coolness on the bag of work clothes, kk, like how perfect timing is that???
Glad you didn't run into psycho person at church.

heath, totally psyched about the great sermon. the very idea of it inspires me.

Two things that made me laugh out loud:

Quote:


Originally Posted by *A&L+1* 

Hobbies: I plan to quit my job and become a midwife. My official hobby is fretting about this.


Quote:


Originally Posted by *heatherfeather* 
Would love to get a big dog, but not until everyone in the house can wipe their own butt.










I just realized, Heather, that unless your daughter is way more butt-wipingly advanced than mine, you are wiping all three butts. Once again, and forevermore, my hat is so off to you I can't even find it.

The workshop went well today, I had a couple unexpected arrivals so all in all it went well. Also the workshop was fun, which was a bonus.


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

some new stuff on the bloggity (link in sig again). took a few months off from it but needed to get some stuff down that i didn't want to do here/around, so blog it is.

am i the morning goddess? it's 1130 on the east coast but only 830 here, and we have snowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!! just a little bit, but still, white stuff on the ground! wheeeeeee! don't worry, it will be gone before noon. and it's not enough to tromp around in or sled on. but it's pretty.









~claudia


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

*I have a question for you mmf*








Is your dc in any lessons/classes? We want to put S in something, but can't decide what. We're thinking something like swimming lessons, tumbling, preferably something with other kids. I need suggestions!

Today I have nothing to do, and I mean _nothing_. I have no money to do anything either. This is really weird, I don't know what to do with myself.


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

meesa: see blog for my current struggle with this topic of "classes."


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

We started mom & me gym classes about this time last year and then did a regular kids only session, but we weren't happy with the teachers...too lax, not keeping kids focused, i.e. expecting more attention/patience than a 3yo has.

They also do art classes at that place which we might do for the summer. We also tried swim lessons at the Y, but both girls got nasty GI bugs so no more of that! ;-) We mainly stick to story hour for now. C also does therapeutic horseback riding so that is $$ enough!

Claudia--I would keep trying with the class too. Can you move to the mom and me session (if they'll make an age exception) for a few weeks until he gets a hang of the routines?


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Meesa: Sol was in "school" last year, from 9-12 every day, and I liked it for her. This year she's not. I would put Sol in gymnastics or tumbling at this age if there was a class I liked. She's very physical and quite agile.
I can't imagine this "nothing" of which you speak. What's it like?
















Today's the day, fellow maymamas. Today's the day. 5 pm central time, send good thoughts.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

TC--I couldn't comment on your blog w/o a google acct so if it's okay I'll do it here. About the most recent sitch, sounds like your intuition is right on, talking about it, speaking from your own experience, and your own discomforts about what you see. If she is the kind of friend who can't handle that, then that will be clear and the end result the same as if you avoided her. About gym class, I so feel for you! Sol behaves like that sometimes like at parties, and I think it's important to honor her feelings and insecurities, encouraging her to participate, but not if she's not ready. Does he enjoy watching? If so, I'd just consider it something for him to see, and go with the intention of just sitting with him and watching. Remind him that to get the hand stamp he's got to do the things, if he wants it so badly. Otherwise, it's just something to watch. Maybe saying, if it comes up, that you'd love for him to participate, but not if he's not ready.

I always try to remember (and it's hard for me







: )that the relationship that matters here is the one between me and Sol, not me and the other mothers, or me and the teacher, or anything else.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Els---will keep you in my thoughts today! Imagine you're this tree







: and imagine me with a more sincere and less cheezee grin.

C is going to flip....just got her bday present! Tickets to see Elizabeth Mitchell in NYC in early June! She adores her music like nothing else. It's always on in the car. We'll probably get a hotel and make a fun trip of it.


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## Jacqueline (Jun 11, 2003)

Is it almost February yet, cause 23 PAGES of posts is just too dang many to keep track of! I'm trying....And, of course, I love hearing about you all, and it has been a big month for us. Maybe what I'm wishing for is a quiet month for the May Mamas. Is that possible?????

Welcome back, jstar. We feel ya on the vacation sleep issues. Our trip to Phoenix went pretty well, actually, but getting into a sleep groove with both kiddos was tough. G had probs not with constipation but the other extreme. Must have picked up a little GI bug. He's okay in all other ways, but had to wear Pull-Ups on the ride home, just in case.

Family loved seeing the new baby A and G was just glad to have so many people around who enjoyed his stories and talk of race cars! Getting together with family always makes me wish we lived closer to them. Perhaps we can change that with the next move.

Renae-I'm so envious of your weekend! Sounds great.

els-you're definitely in my thoughts anyway, but especially later today









I received "Eat, Pray, Love" as a loaner from my sister. Haven't started it yet, but want to. I've seen her on Oprah numerous times.

I know I'm missing lots of personal responses, but I do want to answer the questions posed and I don't have much time.

username: I'm so creative...it's my actual NAME! No one calls me Jacqueline in real life, though. I've always been Jacquie. And Jockey. And Jack. And Jack Attack. So, you see, I've never loved my nicknames yet I really like my given name that no one calls me. Tried to use it when I started HS, and then college, but Jacquie just sticks.

how I met dh: we met the first day of college, but he was dating another, and then he dated another, and another. We were just friends. Then our good friends started dating, so we were kind of left together many times and our friendship grew into more. He's my first serious boyfriend, first kiss, first everything. We met 17.5 years ago and just celebrated our 15th wedding anniversary a couple weeks ago.

pets: two cats, Oliver (10) and Sarah (7.5) Very mellow cats that are often neglected.

kids: two (in my siggie). And that's it. I always figured we'd have 2, and it's worked out well with one of each!

hobbies: kinda like TC said....I'm a doula, too, and tend to gravitate to birth-related books, mags, and videos. Again, not doing the doula thing now as the two kids are plenty. I love movies and Netflix (currently we're viewing the entire "Office" series) and reading a variety of books. I also enjoy cooking (especially baking). I love doing crossword puzzles, too, and am gradually working up to being able to complete the Sunday NYT puzzle on the same day it's printed (without cheating). Oh, and dh and I do the Jumble together each morning. Kinda geeky that way.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Still here I swear! It's hard to post with a newborn, two toddlers and fulltime college courses online..







Bear with me mamas, I'm listening... just can't always respond..


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

ahhh home sweet home!!!







and snow seems to be following me







: i woke up to feed ebin at one point and saw the big fat flakes falling

classes - i want to do swimming again for pool safety reasons. i keep missing the signup day though and they fill up quickly. and i want to look into tae kwon do. isaac loves to play "fight! fight!" in which he does jump kicks and i'd like to channel that urge to fight into a disciplined fighting type thing where he would also learn control and meditation. i'm actually a green belt in tae kwon do and it was something a bunch of us did in high school in pakistan. it was pretty fun. i haven't even looked into it yet but it's on my mental list of things to get to at some point









isaac is also in a daycare preschool class 3 days a week. he's been with 4 of the kids since he was an infant and it is so cute that they're his favorite buddies. i really love the teachers and they do tons of crafty activities and the occasional field trip. his class of 3 year olds is combined with the class of 4 year olds and they usually set up 4 or 5 different stations so the kids have a lot of flexibility of what they want to play with or do craft-wise. so enrolling in any other class type of thing really needs to be a once a week for an hour or so type thing. life feels scheduled enough already and he has lots of interaction with other kids around his age.

els - i'll be thinking of you this afternoon.







: on viet's insensitive comment.

jacquie - i should have probably done pull ups on the way home. the laxative went into overdrive and the night before we left he had 2 runny poop accidents. i packed lots of extra underwear in the carryon and was just







ray i was also praying ebin wouldn't poop on the flight because there is practically no way to change them. flying home yesterday was a little frazzling. isaac was really trying to battle with me in the airport. at one point we were playing tug-of-war with the umbrella stroller







i hate being "that" mom but i was really trying to keep calm. very frustrating. i'm flying to oakland for a weekend trip next week and i think i might leave isaac home. we'll see. then again doug asked him what his favorite part of the trip was and he said the airplane ride.

doug had an awesome trip. they took the train all over holland and stayed with various dutch people in tiny picturesque villages. he had a true "dutch" experience...moreso than any experience i've had there (insert jealousy!). they even went out with a friend of a friend who owned a restaurant and some oyster beds and he took them out to see the oyster beds. pretty neat.

ok i have waaaaay too much to do around here to be sitting for so long


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

Thinking of our sweet elsanne this afternoon.

Recovering from 24 hours of intestinal misery myself. Hoping it was just something I ate on the way back from Michigan yesterday, and that nobody else in the fam gets any part of it.

Had a million things to say, brain not makin' it happen right now.

Really, truly loved "Eat, Pray, Love" - first book I've picked up in a long time and really had a hard time putting it down.


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Aaaaahh, hola everyone. Rough morning at clinic but then my preceptor went home sick so I got the afternoon off unexpectedly, and DH met me for lunch, which was soooooo nice.

Els, thinking of you SO MUCH all day, and at 5 pm central. Mucho support.

Classes: Lily has been in swim classes with DH a bit, but not recently. We JUST started an acrobatics class this past Saturday, and she seems to love it. We missed the first class, and after that parents aren't allowed in the room, so we didn't actually observe the class. But, she was happy to be left at the beginning, and smiling and happy when we returned an hour later, and no comment from the teachers, so we assume all went well. It was a bit odd to drop her off and leave her with strangers for an hour, but so far, so good. The classes are mostly gymnastics-type stuff, but it's an actual dance/trapeze/circus company that teaches them, so she got to hang on the trapeze, etc. I hope she gets into it and wants to continue. We asked her if she liked it, and she exclaimed, "Yes! I LOVED it! Maybe next time they'll teach us to play the FLUTE!" Don't know where she got that, but maybe we'll look into a music class of some sort soon, too...

We are planning to homeschool/unschool, but also participate in a local freeschool when she gets old enough - probably 5 or so. Going to an open house there to learn more about it this weekend, actually. She is so social and loves the idea of "school" so much that we think she will benefit from it. Just playing by ear.

Hi, Jacquie!









Welcome back, jstar!









Juice - Hope the GI bug is truly over and done with. Eeeeew, no fun.

OK, must.do.homework. Hasta-

Sarah


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## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

Welcome back travelers and sick-ones! I love to come back here to see who has popped in throughout the day.

Thinking of you elsanne. With love, peace and strength.

Eleanor does pre-school fulltime. She also has Ice Skating class (Mom&Me with me) on Wednesday evenings and one-on-one swim class on Thursday afternoons. She wanted to take a basketball class on Saturday mornings but it was full (phew). She has a SERIOUS love for her swim teacher, Teacher Brian







He is great with her and every week she gets so excited to go.

Gotta run...work.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

The m/w called and pushed back the appt to 6 pm...*sigh*...having another cappuccino here in my fave cafe before I head off in about 20 min.

Resigned, I am anxious to have this over. I shove aside all doubts, or rather, they don't even make it past the secretary, who insists to them I'm far too busy to be bothered, just leave a message with the Grief Department and she'll get back to you later.

Juice, I am glad to hear that you're out of the intestinal woods, so to speak. Hope you continue on the up and up and that nobody else in the fam gets it!


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Els---I just phoned the secretary and asked if I could hold some of that grief for you for the next little while so you can focus on being gentle with yourself. You can have it back in small sips as it were. Sunday was HJ's first time at church and I introduced him to one of the long-time members and he commented how he has a big world out there to take in and he advised he do so in small sips. I found that touching and fitting at the same time. Warm hugs and comforting thoughts headed your way!


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

thinking of you, els... giant







from all MMF sending their love...

heath: love the small sips comment.

~c


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

Thinking of Elsanne this evening.






















:














:

KK, re your post oy.







I'm so sorry.

I am, as usual, delinquent in answering the questions. get used to it, newbies. I'm the lagger of the group.

Classes: Mia is in ballet and she's really starting to enjoy it. She has been going weekly since Nov or so. It took a few sessions for her to get the hang of participating for 45 min, but now she really likes it. They have their first recital this Sat - cute! (better find that camera cord before then!) They tried on their tutus today in class and they all looked so adorable. Some of the other girls she knows take tap on Tuesdays as well, but Mia has told me, quite emphatically, that tap would be "way too loud"







: That's my girl.









We are also planning on starting her in tae kwon do after she turns 4 (perfect timing for summer).

We also NEEEEEEEEEED very badly to do some swimming lessons this year. We have a pool and these kids have got to learn how to swim, asap. Our deck is fenced in with a locking gate, so they can play out back safely, but the sooner they know how to swim, the better. I'm lagging. (noticing a theme here?







)

Okay, fussing toddler, dinner time?


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

kk: thinking of you, too.
















on commune idea

~c


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Meg---randomly happened upon one of your posts on another thread and avoiding a UA violation will not say more....but wanted to hug you for being so forthright. LOL at your lagger status. Ballet! Gosh do you ever need to take and share pics! I'm wondering if C would like some form of martial arts? I know it would do good for her to work on core strength...hmmm....may have to ask around.


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

Thanks Heather.







: I know how to play the game.


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

rough day in the cosmic universe of mmf









elsanne - you manage to make me laugh even when the going is so rough

you all motivated me to look into the parks and rec tae kwon do classes. the ones closest to us start at age 4.....so it sounds like a plan for summer!

i managed to unpack the boys' clothes and clean and dust their rooms. unfortunately the rest of the house is still a dusty tornado scene







doug stayed home today which was nice. he's been doing laundry all day.

babe awakens from late nap.....


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## nuggetsmom (Aug 7, 2002)

If mamameg is the lagger, I am the lurker.

Elsanne in my thoughts.
KK too

J takes gymnastics and LOVES it. I started her because N who is 6 goes, or rather went, got bored and no longer participates. I also take J to a coop preschool which is really fun but being on the Board of Directors is stressing my out these days. It is cheap since it s a coop. Maybe there is something like that in the area? It doesn't really give me much time off but it gave me a really good group of friends... and it is lots of fun.


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

Elsane~I hope everything went well. Thinking of you

Sarah~I wish there was something like that around here. I mentioned before about DH and I being jugglers. We joke all the time that we're circus freaks









Yesterday turned out to be really fun. Me and Saige melted red pink and white crayons and cut hearts out of them, then made sugar cookies. She actually helped me do the dishes and clean up the living room *shocked* We went to my neice's bday party and she was coughing quite a bit. Then, we get home and she's complaining that her throat and ear hurt. We almost took her to the instacare at 2 am, but she finally fell asleep. I guess we're going to the dr again







:


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

can sum1 post the ?'s again?








:







:


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Danile, if I remember correctly the questions went something like this:
*Where did you get come up with your username?
*How many kids?
*Pets?
*Hobbies?
*If you have a partner, how you met them?

Forgive me if I missed anything, it's a wild week here too. Rowan came home from Gramma's with a nasty cold







: and therefore cannot be bothered to do ANYTHING but sit in front of the television with Blue's Clues.







My friend M.'s son has croup and therefore she cannot watch Rowan tomorrow, so I am going to miss another day at work, most likely (we missed yesterday). So, no money for me and cooped in the house with a miserable sick poopy kiddo. Everyone's sick in our neck of the woods, I'm just waiting for it to be MY turn. *sigh*

When DH gets home I am going to the grocery store and you know, it sounds like fun!









My issues are SUCH a drop in the bucket though, so I am just here to offer love and







s and support to everymama who needs it right now.
Elsanne, let us know how everything went, sweetie.
KK,








Heather, you're amazing.







Love the small sips thing. How appropriate!
Everyone...









More later. Here's to a much quieter February!


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Mama Faery* 
Danile, if I remember correctly the questions went something like this:
*Where did you get come up with your username?
*How many kids?
*Pets?
*Hobbies?
*If you have a partner, how you met them?

More later. Here's to a much quieter February!


Username equals my lastname, i'm a mama, and the start of the two areacodes i was lovin at the time- though the last # wouldn't go on.. so the real number is supposed to be 218, 425.

3 kids. My may babe Dom who was the shock of our lives (and probably the only reason either of us sobered up, went back to church, got married and went to couple's counseling. In essence, we should thank him for turning our lives around.







Isaac was our much planned for- yet very much a surprise baby, and Jasmine my new little freshie nursling.

Pets- Not anymore. After a thousand dollars in damages to my property/neighbors property... we found that dog a very loving home where someone not six months pregnant with two babes could handle her.

Hobbies- Trying to master everything. I'm in college fulltime working towards my midwifery degree, am a Bradley Method Childbirth Instructor, very much have a reading disorder (anything birth/parenting/baby related- even textbooks!)and absolutely LOVIN my babes.

How I met TJ-

That'll take more typing. be back later- nak

And thinking of u Els!


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

my brain has been sloooow to kick into work mode today.

just thinkin of you all .....


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

I have another kid with a double ear infection. I think someone has it in for me.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Is january over yet??? Seriously, we mmf! have collectively had more than enough!

Ear infections stink, double ones more so. Hope relief comes quickly!


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## Miss Juice (Jun 9, 2005)

So sorry to hear of it, meesa! Hope everyone is better soon!

ON another, very silly note: Username SuperKK is available









As is SuperJuice









Maybe if we all changed our names to SuperSomeone, the universe wouldn't dare keep messing with us.

Mostly kidding, as I wouldn't steal KK's super idea that way, but the idea of all the MMFs becoming SuperMMF mad me smile very, very wide.


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Miss Juice* 
ON another, very silly note: Username SuperKK is available









As is SuperJuice









Maybe if we all changed our names to SuperSomeone, the universe wouldn't dare keep messing with us.

Mostly kidding, as I wouldn't steal KK's super idea that way, but the idea of all the MMFs becoming SuperMMF mad me smile very, very wide.

I also like this idea, juice.














:

~c


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## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Miss Juice* 
So sorry to hear of it, meesa! Hope everyone is better soon!

ON another, very silly note: Username SuperKK is available









As is SuperJuice









Maybe if we all changed our names to SuperSomeone, the universe wouldn't dare keep messing with us.

Mostly kidding, as I wouldn't steal KK's super idea that way, but the idea of all the MMFs becoming SuperMMF mad me smile very, very wide.

Eh? Wha? Might have to look into this. (Maybe it was SuperK which was taken. Hmm.)


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Wow. The love youguys are sending is just amazing. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Warning: TMI update. I don't want to censor my experience because writing it here is part of my therapy process. Read no further if it will make you upset.

Yesterday, 4.30 pm central time, the m/w called and asked if we could do it at 6 pm instead of 5 due to work. 'Kay.

6 pm she said we needed to put in some misoprostol vaginally and orally to soften the cervix to make it a bit easier, and it would be several hrs after insertion before the procedure. I wasn't counting on that and was even eager to do it sans softening, just DO IT ALREADY, it's been a tedious wait and psyching myself up I just WANT IT OUT. But, am convinced to wait until today. *sigh* No heart to convey to youguys that it still wasn't done, and yet another opportunity to turn back, I don't want or need any more opportunities because every one wrenches my heart, squeezes it that much tighter, but anyway I check the tarot cards one last time just in case I'm supposed to do something different, and yet again they tell me I'm doing the right thing.

I take the misoprostol which causes nausea and diarrhea, and gas, and then Viet and I head off to her house where in her little makeshift consultorio she has all the instruments, table, probably better equipped than most Mexican state hospitals. I put on a robe and lay down, legs in stirrups, and proceed to feel really uncomfortable things, a little local anesthetic ouch ouch, cervix dilation OUCH OUCH, scrape scrape of my uterus, un-fncking-believable ouch on so many levels. My brain, my heart, my uterus. I kept my hand on my uterus, or tapped my heart, both unconscious tics I didn't think about until I found myself doing them.

During the process I closed my eyes, could not look at Viet; I tried to relax my pelvis (unsuccessfully), and chanted over and over either "om namah shivaya" or "let it flow, let it happen, let it go" non stop quietly under my breath. I was interested in seeing the stuff that was suctioned out, I've never been grossed out by that kind of thing although this stuff carried a bit more emotional charge than, say, a healthy placenta. When she showed it to me, I said goodbye under my breath. When she left the room post-worst part, I burst into heart-wrenching sobs, my face a mask of grief I felt like I could see from the outside, feeling it so deeply, so desperately.

Then, it was over. I walked into that beautiful colonial building on a sunny cobblestone street an hour before, a pregnant woman, and walked out now, not pregnant. I was relieved and overwhelmed with sadness simultaneously. Was? Am. I am relieved and overwhelmed with sadness.

Now, though, I'm just spent. Just, wanting to curl right up here, and take the beautiful words you all have written, and spin them into the loveliest yarn you ever saw, and weave them into a warm blanket to warm my toes and my heart, while my hair is petted by a bunch of mamahands from all over the internet. Thank you for being my friends, and witness to this nightmare. Your support means so much to me.


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

elsanne: my heart is sad with you, and i am crying with the honesty and authenticity of your words. so much love i am sending you... there is nothing more to say than this: i am thinking of you.

~claudia


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## fiddlefern (Nov 9, 2003)

Elsanne,

You know we love you so. All the May Mamas have been thinking of you, and praying for you, and meditating with you, and we will continue to.


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

hey mmf, vain all about me question, is my username pink? it should be...


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

It's not, TC.


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Els: I'm here, and present, and witnessing...


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## nuggetsmom (Aug 7, 2002)

Just checking in on Els. Wow, what an experience, and I am glad you were able to write about it and get it out of your system.

TC is as close as super anybodies username gets, but you are all super mama's in my book

And no TC, your username is not pink today.


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *nuggetsmom* 
TC is as close as super anybodies username gets, but you are all super mama's in my book

nuggets: i don't know what this means, but it feels warm and fuzzy.









~c


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Elsanne---***hugs*** am in awe of your strength, your sharing, your wisdom... much love to you...


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## Sarah'sMama (Nov 30, 2002)

Just checking in quick before we head out on vacay, and glad I did.







els


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

Elsanne...







I'm feeling relieved and sad, right along with you. How are you feeling today, love?


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## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

Here to give Elsanne my love in writing. I am holding you in the light through this sadness and relief. You are a strong and amazing woman.


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

I can't even imagine Els. I am so sorry. I'm hoping Viet is being loving and tender to you while you heal from this whole experience.


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## emmalola (Apr 25, 2004)

Elsanne, I'm here, also witnessing, thinking, sending peace vibes your way.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Coming here is like getting a hug.

It's been up and down. Well, more like normal, and down. Not much up. Eh.


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

gymnastics class saga update from today in blargh. blah. in light of the recent major heavy duty MMF schtuff going on, it feels trivial, but i feel crappy.

~c


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

Oh Claudia. I so know your pain. I had a simliar experience with Mia yesterday re: getting dressed. In the end, she stayed in her pjs all day, didn't go to school, and had tantrum after tantrum about it... all because I couldn't let it go. (See, Renae - I'm guilty myself!







) She (I?) finally recovered around 4:30 PM.







:

So what to do about Marek? Will they allow people to just come and watch without paying? If so, maybe do that once or twice a month until he seems more sure about participating? Have you asked him why he doesn't want to participate (later, not in the moment)? Does he maybe feel like he can't do it?

As for school, I would start talking to him about it now and make sure he understands what it really entails (ie, participation, mom leaving him there, etc) and see how he reacts. Repeat this conversation weekly so he really gets the picture. Based on his reaction and readiness, consider putting him in preschool. Talk to the school about your uncertainty about his readiness and keep the option open of trying it out and if it doesn't go well, quit going and try again later if he seems to gain interest.

And I know what you mean about these things feeling trivial amidst the mmf madness, but a hard day is a hard day, no matter HOW hard it is.


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

Elsanne, thinking of you as a continual stream of consciousness. Love, light and healing to you, sister.


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## Jacqueline (Jun 11, 2003)

elsanne-I'm thinking of you too (mucho mucho). Thank you for sharing it all with us...enjoy the warm blanket!


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Alright mamas...

I'm a big ball of whiny tears today.

First off , let me admit I am utterly and completely a mommy's girl... even if my mom drives me absolutely insane sometimes.

TJ has a high probability of getting a management position in his company down in Vancouver and we'd have to relocate immediately. They'd pay for the move... but we'd have to leave, rent our house out, uproot the kids (though they don't have any super close friends here anyway. Most of our close friends are in the Seattle area). I don't want to leave my mom... I don't want to leave this area... I mostly am scared and depressed about going to a new town with no one that I know.. (even though I know some of you are relatively close..) and I feel like I'll be totally lonely there. *Sigh*

I know I shouldn't whine given the other predicaments you other mamas are dealing with... but I'm a small town girl and Vancouver feels like a WORLD away. That being said... I would love to be closer to Oregon again. Sometimes I feel like a loner up here because I am treated a little different for my parenting/birthing/living styles.. ANd the beautiful weather. And the beautiful temple of our church in Portland that TJ and I walked circles around for months when we started going back to church and rebuilding our relationship when Dom was just two months old...


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

els - your experience sounded much like i could imagine it and thanks for sharing the full spectrum of emotions. i think the real physical pain of it matches the emotional pain. and then the physical pain is over but the emotional pain isn't. but at least it is tempered by major relief. i hope you get a chance to curl up in a ball and leave the rest of the world going on outside around you while you get to recuperate.

danile - vancouver is close to all of us! but i can understand leaving your home. and your mom!

gah - ebin has entered a new phase of expression which involves SCREECHING!! A LOT!!! he has realized he has a voice...he just doesn't have words. i think he's trying to compete with his brother on the sound scale

claudia - i read your blog. i think you handled it really well even if it felt really carpy. you had a plan. you stuck with it. i bet if you tried again he may make the step to join in because he will know you will leave. (he saw you follow through on that plan). it seems like he is scared to join in but if you can give him that forceful prod he will enjoy it so much *and* have that accomplished feeling of conquering a fear. of course it is so hard to 'make' a child do anything they're resisting. so it ends up being some sort of jedi mind trick to be able to get them to do it. an idea - i bet M feels like it is all of the kids vs. him because they are all doing it...and he isn't (yet). is there any way to get to class early and pick a nice looking kid and say 'hi this is M, what's your name?' 'can M put his mat next to yours because he doesn't know anyone in this class?' then put his mat down and act like there is no other assumption except him participating. 'here M you sit next to __ and i am going to sit right over here and watch you'

i could also see him enjoying a preschool experience where he would get to know the kids and feel comfortable with the routine once he got used to it. i wish he could be in isaac's class so he would know someone







are any of the westside kids you know attending a preschool close to you?

i should take a shower. ebin is at a trickier phase now with regard to showers. we're past the bouncy seat in the bathroom phase and into the not safe anywhere on the floor unattended phase. and i can't wait for nap because i'm going to a board meeting (and i think my time on the board is over...but i've been included in the email list. so who knows!)

my nice news is that i actually got to go out for a drink last night. nice! i got the boys down and went to meet a friend for a couple of hours. ebin didn't wake while i was gone and all was well.


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

Danile~That's a big decision. I'm a big mamas girl too. DH was thinking of going to law school, but we would most likely have to move out of state and I can't leave my family. I talk to my mom almost every day. Maybe you can weigh the pros and cons and decide what is best for your family.

els~*hugs* I hope things get better.

meg~I'm glad to got to go out. I totally relate to the comment on showers. I put K down for 2 min. so I could pee and he found 2 small things on the carpet to put in his mouth while I was gone.

Work today was awful! I got out 2 hours late. I was by myself with 2 drs, 4 dogs that needed their teeth cleaned, 3 spays, a neuter some appts and 2 walk in c-sections. I hadn't pumped in 5 hours and it felt like my boobs were going to explode! We had a cat today with a mouth infection so bad I had to pull all but 3 teeth









I need a drama break. Me and DH got into a conversation/debate about dates that we have taken me/which kid to the dr in front of the nurse at Saige's appt yesterday. We were so tired it all started to blend together. I apologized to her and she told us we should send the kids to grandma's and go out on a date.







:


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## DucetteMama21842 (May 11, 2006)

Meesa-

Call me ignorant... but i had no idea animals had cesareans! Wow! Now that's technology! Hope thing start feeling better for you! Thanks for the words of support. I'm on the phone with my mom multiple times a day... our house happens to be only ten blocks away from hers (except she just moved this week).

JStar- I would love to see you guys on a regular basis... but again... I'd really miss my mom. She's such a big help. And it makes me sad to think of moving the boys away when they are so close to her and Jasmine before she gets the chance to really know her.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Meesa--I didn't know animals had csecs either. And, I don't think I knew you were a vet tech! Or maybe you did tell us but I was embroiled in my drama.

You meant "jstar" where you put "meg"--totally understandable as you are new, though, so no worries.

Jstar, you have inspired me to go out tonight for drinks. I'm going to, dammit.

I'm having mega "Viet is a total loser" moments here. Nothing new, and you hardly need more reason to despise him, as you really only hear the worst, but mr. insensitive left me alone last night after the girls went to bed, I got on the internets and was happy for that, but then he just didn't come back until after I went night night. I think he thought I wanted time alone. I think I did too except that I was sad and lonely after a bit. I don't know if it would have been worse to have him there. Where did he go? To his mother's.
Today I call him, and tell him right away, I'm calling to hear some nice words, and I can't remember what he said but it wasn't memorable, then he says he's at his mom's (I can hear they're watching TV), who doesn't know anything about the abortion. I'm calling from work, yet another side job I have. He's sitting there, watching TV with his mom, and I'm at work, the day after this biz. I say, at the end of the stoopid conversation, well I was calling to hear something nice, but I guess later, huh?

Whatever. I'm lookin' for love in all the wrong places, I should know by now how little I can count on him and I should just shove the mama's boy right outta my life.

I probably won't, as youguys have observed, just hear me vent.

One thing I really feel strongly post-ab. is a desire to grab my life by the horns, do my thing, be myself, since I am not dedicating the next year of my life to a small baby I should really take my life back, or make more room for my things, whatever makes me feel like me. Something like that, although writing it out makes me feel stupidly self-centered and very much a product of the Me Generation. *sigh*


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Hi all-

Danile - big decision! I can imagine how hard it would be for you to leave. It is never easy even when you're excited and totally gung-ho about it. Keep us updated!

Meesa - hope you get some rest and relaxation soon!

TC - I've been subconsciously mulling over your sitch with class and your blog post today brought it up in my mind again. I am just thinking out loud so don't take offense at anything - obviously I'm not there and our kids are totally different so take what you want and leave the rest!

So, why do you feel the need to keep trying? It seems to me that the energy you expend to take him there, discuss the watching vs participating, etc. is not worth it. I think that he is just not ready for a class, and you can just wait another 6 mos or a year or whatever. M. is obviously a well-adjusted, healthy kid with just a little different social pattern than those other 3-year-olds in the class, and that is fine. I have seen him interact with people he knows and he is obviously just fine. I wouldn't worry about it, and just forget it for a while. Just be very matter-of-fact, no blaming or extended discussion, just "we decided we're not going back to gymnastics class; since you don't want to do the actual activities it's just not worth the money and my time." And I mean really, truly no blame or anything, just a very simple explanation. To me personally, 3 tries is enough and you've done your job of letting him lead the way - he seems not ready, and time to move on.

And of course he is interested in class and school and buses and stuff - it seems every single 3-year-old I know is, especially if they're unschooled.







I think if you aren't ready to send him to preschool, don't do it. You can talk and read about it plenty without actually doing it. And when you are ready, he will probably be more ready for it, too.







Good luck - I know it's not so simple when you're living it!

S.


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Els - I can identify with the struggle between wanting to do stuff for *me* and feeling guilty about it. So I can't really tell you what to do.







But just know I hear you. I think you are ready for some *you* time in your life, since you have been raising two small children virtually alone for almost 4 years.

And in some ways, for me personally, I feel like the "me time" I crave is really "personal growth/life fulfillment" time that actually usually results in things that have positive impact on others outside my family...for example, I like to appreciate art and read things that inspire me and hang out with friends that do exciting things in the world and do volunteer work and research ways to work as a midwife and make money by helping underserved populations...all things that are fun and fulfilling in a selfish way but also affect others positively. And I have a suspicion that your "you time" would look kind of like that, too, with just slightly different key focus topics.









S.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Elsanne, I am weeping. I am here in every possible way, and have complete sympathy and empathy alongside you.

I have something profound to share with you (and everymama here, because it is that telling to me right now), and it made me twist inside with the realization of it;
My period was three weeks late. I should have gotten it earlier this month, MUCH earlier, and I knew I was NOT pregnant, but it was just...inexplicably late.







:
So anyway, this morning, my period comes. And hurts. A LOT. Like, more than usual to the point where I was like "god, is this normal?!?!" But I deal, and take painkillers, and nap when Rowan napped (he napped! HOLY heck!) and then I came here and read your update, Elsanne, and while I sat here with tears in my eyes my uterus CRAMPED.
Like, "HELLO, sympathy!!"
I am just floored by how I can feel so close to people without having even "met" anyone in person. It's just...yeah. *sigh*

So I guess I just wanted to say I'm here.







:

And now I am off to sit with some tea and watch a movie. DH is going out with friends tonight.

I love you all.


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

i don't think it sounds like selfish ME generation talk at all. i think it is the talk of someone who just gained an immense amount of freedom

isaac is obsessed with school buses and i don't even think they have school buses around here for the kids

the shrieker is rolling around on the floor. it is like living with a parrot. a really talkative parrot


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## TurboClaudia (Nov 18, 2003)

conclusion to gymnastics saga on bloggity.










~c


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Aww, Claudia, so sorry to hear it! But you know, you tried.







And you honored M's choice, you know?
We're starting to think that Rowan is done with music class too. It's the last one in the cycle of classes that we have done since Rowan was 6 months old? Something like that...and the cut-off is 4 years old anyway, so this one will probably be the last.

And THEN...we got nothin'.









I would write more but I have to get our stuff together to go to the library for story hour. After a week of pretty much not leaving the house (HELLO, cabin fever!







) Rowan is definitely well enough to make it to the library. We'll see how the madness commences.









jstar, your post made me







A really talkative parrot! That sometimes speaks in tongues and goes utterly DEAF.







That's our parrot, anyway.

Have a great day, everyone.


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

No time to really post, I'm working again *sigh* Hugs to you all


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

mornin! i have to work today too

i just got a lecture from my mom on how i am letting isaac get away with too much









i've decided to leave isaac here for my next trip. i'm flying to oakland on wednesday and was supposed to take him. it is too soon though i think and he wants to stay home. at least he says he does...i wonder how he'll do when i actually pack. it will be WAY more relaxing for me though to just have ebin.

i'm glad the gymnastics thing is resolved -- no more stress about that!


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

Claudia, I'm sorry the gymnastics thing was so frustrating, but I'm sure he learned somethings from the experience (about gymnastics and about how mama has her limits, too) and I think you handled it all quite well.

I was thinking... do you have any dance studios in your area that do a mini day camp thing? We have a place here that does a preschool program for kids ages 2-4 called Wiggles & Giggles. It's a drop off thing, but only lasts 3 hours. They dance, read stories (but very dramatically), do puppet shoes, play in the garden. It's a really nice intro to any sort of away from mama activity. If you found something like that, wold Marek be into it? I dunno... maybe he's just not ready for anything, and that's okay too.









Elsanne, I'm sorry Viet is being so lame. He really doesn't understand the jewel you are, does he?









Gotta go get Mia dressed. We are working on this not being such a struggle and I put some new rules around when we get dressed (right after breakfast) so I guess I better stick to her, um my new rules.


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

oops


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

It's not very common for animals to have a c/s, but I see it more where I am because we "specialize" in bulldogs. They can't/shouldn't have puppies on their own, they can't handle it.

Claudia~I'm sorry gymnastics didn't work out. I tried doing classes with S when she was younger and it didn't work at all. I tried again about 6 months later and she did fine. He probably just isn't ready quite yet.

I think we might finally make it to story time tomorrow too. We're definitely getting cabin fever at our house too.


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## orangecanoe (Aug 3, 2003)

Claudia--bummer! Sounds like our experience with story hour and the once a month playgroup. C would actually scowl at the librarian.







Finally last fall we went to E's age group story hour and she was much better. Can you do obstacle courses around the house? We do those a lot for OT/PT exercises and the girls have a blast.


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## A&L+1 (Dec 12, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jstar* 
i'm flying to oakland on wednesday and was supposed to take him.

When and for how long? Maybe I can come up and see you.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *TurboClaudia* 
conclusion to gymnastics saga on bloggity.









TC, I really think that you have done the best thing you could by exploring this class with him and letting him choose. In the end, he is his own person who will navigate life and all its lessons in his own way.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mamameg* 
Elsanne, I'm sorry Viet is being so lame. He really doesn't understand the jewel you are, does he? :









: But you know, it seems to me that it is not so much that he doesn't appreciate you as it is he is incapable of being the person who puts you ahead of himself. It is so _his_ issue. He seems emotionally or spiritually stunted to me rather than just your run of the mill a$$.

I went to a Whine and Wine evening last night with some of the local birth network women. It was very nice and I still feel socially inept. I want these women to already be my longtime friends (like they are to each other) and it feels hard to break in sometimes especially since I am not (yet) doing birth work. It was reassuring in a sad way to hear them talking about how frustrated they are that the group has shifted from a friendly, passionate about birth type of group to a competitive, networking-for-personal-gain type of group. We are thinking of having spin off activities to build back up the sisterhood.

Hug for KK


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

i'm flying down wednesday night and coming back monday for my friend's baby shower (the one who had such a hard time getting a pregnancy that would stick). i am so excited for her! so i'll be there a while--maybe we could coordinate something (fun!). her shower is saturday. my mom might be coming up on the weekend and staying in a hotel. she was going to take isaac so now she isn't sure if she'll come. but she (we) have friends in the city and i talked to her this morning about possibly spending sunday in the city. monday i leave in the morning. i think thurs and friday are totally up to whatever we want to do. cherie lives in el sobrante (north of richmond on the 80)

i've been going nuts sewing baby stuff







i feel like this might be her only babe


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Lisa, you have hit the nail on the head wrt Sr. Viet. He really is stunted....especially when one sees his family of origin. Whackooooos!!!

I'm doing much better today. Viet and I had another talk, we really have a hard time understanding each other. *sigh* But for now, all is well, I'm feeling mo bettah every day, and I also think Sarah you are right--I am a woman who has chosen more freedom, and am eager to exercise it. Eager to prove to myself that it was the right decision, because 'look what I'm doing now'...

Renae, WHOA DUDE, that's some serious empathetic uteruses. Truly a twilight zone-theme-song moment. Wow.

I just want to tell you angels again how deeply thankful I continue to be, as bills come due and FINALLY ahole boss is depositing my one meager paycheck of the month, and thank Lakshmi (think she's abundance?) for youguys. You really saved my rear this month. Really, truly, and I will never ever forget it--and pay it forward when my time comes.


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## jstar (Jul 22, 2004)

that's good you had a talk with viet.

since we are having a down-on-our-partners kinda week and i typically only share my frustrations with my partner i would like to share some positivity and say he's doing well with his own addictions at the moment (ie. alcohol). he hasn't had a single beer all week and has been making lots and lots of tea. me ---> whoa! this is not a quitting drinking thing but i am nevertheless super happy about this effort!

can you tell i am meant to be working today? posty posty pants.

the office search is sucky btw. i looked at one this morning at the end of my street (convenient!) but so fah-reakin expensive.


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## mamameg (Feb 10, 2004)

I feel so stupidly down right now. I just got a call from a friend here in town telling me she was "meeting the girls over at The Lodge for a drink, are you coming?" Me:"the girls?" Her:"Oh <awkward pause> you didn't get that email?" No, I didn't get that email.









The thing is, I am never able to go out during the week, so I'm sure that's why I didn't get invited, but it still stings. Mostly because it's a huge reminder of why I feel so socially isolated and starved for adult interaction, which leads to me feeling really burnt out on these kids all the time. See, everyone here does girls' night out during the week, and due to John's work sched, I can never make it. They do it at least once, sometimes twice a month, and I have been once in the past year, I think. All of their Hs either work from home or get home around 5:30, so going out for them is no big deal, but it's the worst time for me. And then when it comes to getting together on the weekend (the only time I can do it) everyone is always having family time or date nights or whatever.

I guess I've just had a really lonely day and this was the icing on the cake. (Although, the truly sweetest part might have been when Sultan told me, no, he does not in fact care anything about my feelings.


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## elsanne (Mar 10, 2004)

Oh Fugg, Meg. Carpy day indeed. I can so commisserate with feeling left out like that, it really doesn't feel good. *I* would have sent you the email about the girls' night out, if that makes you feel any better.







And Sultan is just a teenage a$$. Your big lesson of the day (ouch): Don't take any of it personally.


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## Mama Faery (Apr 19, 2004)

Meg,







Good LORD, I dunno what I will do when Rowan reaches the TEEN YEARS.







: I'm sorry you're having a hard time with him, hon.

Lisa, sounds like your birth network mamas have a good idea with more sisterhood-bonding sorts of things.
SO empathize with the "just wanting to stop being awkward and be friends already!" feeling.

Elsanne, always,







I am so glad you're feeling mo betta.









I am feeling pretty carpy. Not only am I experiencing the menses from he!!, but I am also getting Rowan's cold. Chills, sore throat, stuffy head, whee!
NOT.

I'm off the hook for watching my friend M.'s kid tomorrow though, he's sick too. It's that kinda week around here.

I do, however, have to nanny tomorrow night, as long as I don't get much sicker. *sigh*

Since I'll probably hunker down on the couch with the kidlet tomorrow morning, I will post more then.







:
I really REALLY love the hand-me-down laptop!

Good night, mamas.


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## mcsarahb (Aug 25, 2003)

Oh Meg, that bites.







I totally understand how you feel. I want to have drinks with you on weekends, [email protected]!

Renae - feel better!

Happy Friday, everybuggy. I'm off to the hospital.

S.


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

Meg~ I'm sorry! I hate those days. I'll have a glass of champagne with you!










jstar~that's good to hear! That has to be hard.

We're actually well enough to go to story time today! S is so excited.


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## Jacqueline (Jun 11, 2003)

It's February already!!!

Here's our new thread.....

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...7#post10440947


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