# Installing someone else's child's car seat in your car... WWYD?



## North_Of_60 (May 30, 2006)

My friend has an almost 3 year old who I have recently offered to watch one day a week. She has a britax marathon that she said I can install in my car and leave it there while I'm here (I'm on vacation at home, so I'm only here till the end of August, so I'm only helping her out while I'm here).

The issue is that I KNOW he is forward facing, but in my car I am just not comfortable with it. I know he's not over 35 pounds, either (per the "my child weighs such-and-such conversations".. lol ).

If we were ever in an accident I would obviously feel TERRIBLE to begin with, but even more sore if he sustained injuries that otherwise would not have happened with him rear facing (like the skull coming off the spine in that one video, comes to mind).

So do I insist that he ride rear facing in my car? Or do I let her make the call?What if she says he doesn't like to ride rear facing? Should I insist on trying it first? My hope is that if that's the case, he'll do it because my DD is rear facing, so he might go along with it knowing that she's right beside him looking in the same direction.

If another child was going to ride in your car, would you insist they sit rear facing while in your care?


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## dallaschildren (Jun 14, 2003)

If he meets the minimum weight requirement (20 pounds), then all you can do is talk to the parent and reiterate the importance of keeping him rear facing to the weight limits of the seat, and hope she makes the call to do so. If not, then I would have her sign something stating that she prefers he ride forward facing in your vehicle while in your care and vehicle.

DC


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## Ruthla (Jun 2, 2004)

I think that in cases like this, you should go with whoever is being more strict about safety. If the mom wanted the child RF, and the DCP thought he was old enough for FF, he should go RF. If the mom is comfy with FF, and the DCP wants him RF, then he should go RF in the DCP's car.

I guess, ultimately, you can't go against her wishes, but you CAN say that you're not willing to drive him unless he's RF.

How about telling her what you posted here: "I don't feel comfortable letting him ride FF when IMO he should still be RF. I'm willing to install the carseat properly and deal with any tantrums he may throw over not riding FF. Is that OK with you?"


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## wannabe (Jul 4, 2005)

I'd do the installation, rear facing, and then, if she says anything, just say "oh, is he 33 pounds already?". If she says no, but he rides FF, tell her you're just not comfortable with him riding FF until there is no other option, because it's so much safer.

If I were driving someone else's child there's no way I could bear having them in anything but the most safe seat. What if something happened?

Quote:

I think that in cases like this, you should go with whoever is being more strict about safety.
I like this logic


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## stik (Dec 3, 2003)

I can't tell from you're post if this suggestion is even practical, but maybe it would be best to plan activities that don't involve driving. It would spare you from worrying about conflict with your friend, and would avert a huge range of potential safety issues and injuries.


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## North_Of_60 (May 30, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *stik* 
I can't tell from you're post if this suggestion is even practical, but maybe it would be best to plan activities that don't involve driving. It would spare you from worrying about conflict with your friend, and would avert a huge range of potential safety issues and injuries.

That's what I originally suggested. I didn't want to have to install and uninstall a seat every week for just one day, but it turns out she has a spare anyway so I can leave it installed. I was hoping not to have to worry about it, and there's a ton of stuff to do around here within walking distance.

I think I'm going to just do like Ruthla suggested and tell her up front that I'd prefer him to be rear facing. He's at an age where it might be fun and different, especially if it's something he only gets to do while at my house. Right?


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## velochic (May 13, 2002)

I think it's the mom's call. She's not asking you to break the law. The child is well within the guidelines to FF. If you don't feel comfortable complying with the mother's very reasonable request, then you probably shouldn't watch the child.


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## kblackstone444 (Jun 17, 2007)

I have a question- how do you FIT a child who's that big (almost three- much taller than an infant) in a rear-facing position? I've never heard of that. As soon as my son was 20 pounds and a year (or whatever it is- it's been 11 years since I had to remember), I flipped him to forward facing. He wasn't a tall baby- he was average, but his legs and feet would get all crunched up and he was miserable.

That being asked, if he's within the law's requirements, I don't think there's anything you can do about it but to tell his Mother that you're not comfortable with him forward facing. Maybe you can make it a game with the little boy and your daugher- count birds our the rearwiew window or something like that?


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## The4OfUs (May 23, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *velochic* 
I think it's the mom's call. She's not asking you to break the law. The child is well within the guidelines to FF. If you don't feel comfortable complying with the mother's very reasonable request, then you probably shouldn't watch the child.









:


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## Clarinet (Nov 3, 2005)

I think it's the mom's call, too, unless you haven't talked to her about carseat safety and your opinions. If you haven't, now is a great time







. If you have already discussed it and she still chose to put her child forward facing, she's made her choice. Although, since she's not going to be in the car with you, I don't see any harm in just not mentioning it and turning the seat around when she leaves.


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## ThreeBeans (Dec 2, 2006)

HOw much DOES he weigh? That affects my answer. If he's at least 30 lbs, I would simply express my views that I would prefer him rearfacing and see what mom says, but her opinion would be the be-all and end all on the matter.

If he's significantly less than that...say 25 lbs....I would argue my case much more strongly. In this case I would say that you as the driver have some pretty strong leeway...not to mention liability.

To the person who asked, 20 pounds and one year is the BARE MINIMUM for safety and certainly not Best Practice. At that age and size, the baby is still at EXTREMELY increased risk for serious if not fatal spinal injuries in a forward facing collision. My son, 2.5 recently turned forward facing at 33 lbs and 38 inches. He was more comfortable rearfacing than forward facing (his legs didn't dangle). For the most part, parents who say that their children were 'uncomfortable' are simply interpretting their own prejudices on a perfectly happy kid.


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## alegna (Jan 14, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *harleyhalfmoon* 
I have a question- how do you FIT a child who's that big (almost three- much taller than an infant) in a rear-facing position? I've never heard of that.

It's really quite easy. They're very flexible. Dd either crosses her legs or leaves them folded like a frog or hangs them over the sides.

She's rf. Almost 3. About 36in and about 30lbs

-Angela


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## North_Of_60 (May 30, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *velochic* 
I think it's the mom's call. She's not asking you to break the law. The child is well within the guidelines to FF. If you don't feel comfortable complying with the mother's very reasonable request, then you probably shouldn't watch the child.

There has been no "request" made. I'm simply wondering how to approach the subject when she shows up with a seat and wants to install it forward facing in my car.

I would also rather find an amicable solution to the problem, such as trying him rear facing or agreeing to do local activities without a car, instead of going back on my offer to help a friend.

If SHE decides to not let me watch him after I suggest that we try him rear facing like my daughter, then that's her prerogative. But I'm not going to initiate it, I just won't put him in the car.


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## lilyka (Nov 20, 2001)

If you can't respect the moms descision to turn him around (which is an ok thing to do at three years old. it is not like she is asking you to turn her 3 month old forward facing) it is probably best he not be in your car.


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## North_Of_60 (May 30, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ThreeBeans* 
How much DOES he weigh?

30 pounds.


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## ThreeBeans (Dec 2, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *North_Of_60* 
30 pounds.

At 30 lbs and three years, I would be comfortable turning him forward facing for the occasional trip in your car.


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## dallaschildren (Jun 14, 2003)

Remember that it is the factor of AGE (physical maturity) that is the most important determining factor when considering general readiness to forward face. The seat manufacturers have begun manufacturing seats to higher rear facing weight limits with the knowledge that the heavier, the statistically older the child will be. Think of the days not too long ago, when all seats only RF to 20 pounds. With the advent of time, statistically children were hitting the 20 pound mark BEFORE their 1 year birthday, so seat manufacturers ramped up the RF weight limit to accomodate the weight of children today.
I gave the input I did because # 1, she stated the child is 3 years old which far surpasses the minimum RF age recommendation. If he met the other minimum recommendation which is 20 pounds, then it is perfectly acceptable for him to remain FF as he is presently riding. Since the OP is uncomfortable, she should discuss the benefits of RF with the parent and and if the mom still wishes for her son to be FF, short of refusing to care for him, the only other thing that would "protect" the OP from a legal standpoint if something were to happen, would be a paper trail, hence my recommendation to have the mom state her wishes in writing. IRL I talk with many parents and caregivers who arrive at my checkpoint and after some discussion, leave with their child still in the RF position when a few minutes earlier they were telling me their child was 1 year and 20 pounds and is ready to FF now. Most times it is only access to education that empower the parent or caregiver to change their mind and make a different choice.
FWIW from a liability standpoint, all CPS techs and instructors are to plainly state that a parent refused a recommendation at the fitting stations on the checklist, and the parent must sign it.

DC


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## hipmummy (May 25, 2007)

ds is 20 pounds and 10 months? he is 30 inches and he is already cramped I am going to turn he around when he is a year and 33 inches. I have been a nanny for fifteen years and never in my life have I heard of keep a toddler rear facing. In Ma if the child is one and 20 pounds everyone turns them around. The kids love the social interaction. Looking at a blank seat is really tough for a toddler. I can see if the child is not yet one and is 30 pounds but three years old. It sounds quite severe. If you do not feel comfortable with the norm than don't watch her child. Your anxiety from the issue while driving is much more dangerous than a three pound dif. in opinion. It is not worth a debate with your friend.


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## stik (Dec 3, 2003)

Here's what I'm missing:

To me, daycare does not imply driving around. As a mother who uses daycare, I would strongly prefer that my dcp not transport my children in her car. I had a dcp who drove the kids around a lot, and it made me crazy (I like to actually know where my children are, and not have to go hunting if I try to pick them up earlier than expected. Among other things.) As I read your post, you've committed to helping your friend one day a week. Where in the course of all this have you stated your commitment to driving your friend's child anywhere?

If it were me, the friend would be welcome to install her seat in my car any which way she chooses, as she seems to feel that you should have a car seat available for her child. If she installed it in a way I wasn't comfortable with, I just wouldn't drive. If the occasion arises where driving is absolutely necessary, you can always turn the seat rf (to satisfy your safety concerns - I wouldn't suggest it for any other reason) and make an excuse later if she asks.


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## North_Of_60 (May 30, 2006)

Thanx everyone. I'm going to bring it up when she gets here, but I'll leave it up to her.


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## alegna (Jan 14, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *hipmummy* 
ds is 20 pounds and 10 months? he is 30 inches and he is already cramped I am going to turn he around when he is a year and 33 inches. I have been a nanny for fifteen years and never in my life have I heard of keep a toddler rear facing. In Ma if the child is one and 20 pounds everyone turns them around. The kids love the social interaction. Looking at a blank seat is really tough for a toddler. I can see if the child is not yet one and is 30 pounds but three years old. It sounds quite severe. If you do not feel comfortable with the norm than don't watch her child. Your anxiety from the issue while driving is much more dangerous than a three pound dif. in opinion. It is not worth a debate with your friend.

Well, 25 years ago no one was in carseats, so just because you haven't heard of it, means nothing.

It is MUCH safer. I would never turn a 1 yr old around if there was a seat that could hold them RF.

I *strongly* suggest you do more research on that.

My dd interacts just fine rf. It's not like she could see my face while I'm driving anyway.

-Angela


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## North_Of_60 (May 30, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *stik* 
Where in the course of all this have you stated your commitment to driving your friend's child anywhere?

That's just it, I haven't. I originally said I wouldn't need a seat because installing it and uninstalling it would be a PIA, and that there's lots of stuff to do around here. It's *SHE* that suggested I just leave the spare one installed. Since I doubt I'll have no huge desire to drive anywhere, it's not that big of an issue, because we can just walk. I was just wondering if I should get her to install it rear facing since it's in my car and that's my preference. If she doesn't want to, that's fine. Like other's have mentioned, he is well beyond the minimum requirements. If it bothers me that much, we'll just walk.

Thanls everyone.


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## lovingmommyhood (Jul 28, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *hipmummy* 
ds is 20 pounds and 10 months? he is 30 inches and he is already cramped I am going to turn he around when he is a year and 33 inches. I have been a nanny for fifteen years and never in my life have I heard of keep a toddler rear facing. In Ma if the child is one and 20 pounds everyone turns them around. The kids love the social interaction. Looking at a blank seat is really tough for a toddler. I can see if the child is not yet one and is 30 pounds but three years old. It sounds quite severe. If you do not feel comfortable with the norm than don't watch her child. Your anxiety from the issue while driving is much more dangerous than a three pound dif. in opinion. It is not worth a debate with your friend.


"Social interaction" is really not a concern for me when I'm driving my children somewhere. Safety is number one. The driver should be paying attention to driving anyway. Looking at a blank seat has never been a problem for either of my children. When they have been rear facing their whole lives they know no different.

Being a nanny for X amount of years does not a car seat expert make. Sorry.

OP I think it is okay to let him be FF but if you are uncomfortable with it I would talk to the mother. Good luck!!

Sorry OP I didn't see your updated reply. Looks like you've got it worked out.


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## ThreeBeans (Dec 2, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *hipmummy* 
ds is 20 pounds and 10 months? he is 30 inches and he is already cramped I am going to turn he around when he is a year and 33 inches. I have been a nanny for fifteen years and never in my life have I heard of keep a toddler rear facing. In Ma if the child is one and 20 pounds everyone turns them around. The kids love the social interaction. Looking at a blank seat is really tough for a toddler. I can see if the child is not yet one and is 30 pounds but three years old. It sounds quite severe. If you do not feel comfortable with the norm than don't watch her child. Your anxiety from the issue while driving is much more dangerous than a three pound dif. in opinion. It is not worth a debate with your friend.


You are incorrect. At 30 inches he is not 'cramped'. He fits just fine.

Oh, and I am in MA and both my toddlers were and are rear-facing. Speak for yourself









Just because you personally haven't heard of something doesn't mean it's not the better thing to do. Why would you reject what is immeasurably safer for a child, just because it's new to you? That makes no sense at all.


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## rere (Apr 21, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *stik* 
Here's what I'm missing:

To me, daycare does not imply driving around. As a mother who uses daycare, I would strongly prefer that my dcp not transport my children in her car. I had a dcp who drove the kids around a lot, and it made me crazy (I like to actually know where my children are, and not have to go hunting if I try to pick them up earlier than expected. Among other things.) As I read your post, you've committed to helping your friend one day a week. Where in the course of all this have you stated your commitment to driving your friend's child anywhere?

If it were me, the friend would be welcome to install her seat in my car any which way she chooses, as she seems to feel that you should have a car seat available for her child. If she installed it in a way I wasn't comfortable with, I just wouldn't drive. If the occasion arises where driving is absolutely necessary, you can always turn the seat rf (to satisfy your safety concerns - I wouldn't suggest it for any other reason) and make an excuse later if she asks.

Lots of parents like the idea of their kids getting to go to zoos,museums,beaches...fun places even if they can't be the one to take them.I would guess that the mother also didn't want to stop her friend and her friend's child from doing some fun activities just because her kid was there.So she offered the seat so they could all have a good time.


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## lovingmommyhood (Jul 28, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *stik* 
If the occasion arises where driving is absolutely necessary, you can always turn the seat rf (to satisfy your safety concerns - I wouldn't suggest it for any other reason) and make an excuse later if she asks.

I have to disagree. I don't think that the seat should be reinstalled by the DCP for any reason. If the seat was turned RF by the DCP and something actually did happen she could be blamed for having reinstalled the seat. I don't know this for a fact but it seems like it could be a problem.


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## North_Of_60 (May 30, 2006)

Oh my goodness, there's a safety forum!!!!























This wasn't here when I started this thread was it?







:


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## ThreeBeans (Dec 2, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *North_Of_60* 
Oh my goodness, there's a safety forum!!!!























This wasn't here when I started this thread was it?







:

No


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## North_Of_60 (May 30, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ThreeBeans* 
No









Oh good. Thought I was loosing it for a minute.


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## bobica (May 31, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *velochic* 
I think it's the mom's call. She's not asking you to break the law. The child is well within the guidelines to FF. If you don't feel comfortable complying with the mother's very reasonable request, then you probably shouldn't watch the child.









Yup, i agree.


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## wonderwahine (Apr 21, 2006)

I agree with pp's, its the moms call.

On a side note, ds is now FF, it was a fight every time to get him in the seat, we litterally had to force him in, and he would cry until he hyperventilated and turned blue, even with me soothing him and offering to nurse while still in the seat. So I would end up having to take him out, and nurse him to comfort with him unrestrained. We decided since hes over the age and minimum weight limit for FF, we would try it once, well... it worked, he REQUESTS getting in, and climbs into it himself now.

I figure having him FF is better than nothing at all.


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## MeepyCat (Oct 11, 2006)

I think there's an argument to be made that in your car, the kids follow your rules, and meet or exceed the safety expectations set by their parents. Your friend may allow - may even prefer - her child to ride forward facing in her car. In your car, you prefer children to ride backward facing as you feel that is safer. In her car, her child would ride forward facing and yours would ride backward facing, meeting your safety expectations.

Ultimately, I think this is a pretty trivial issue. Kids can adjust to riding different ways in different cars. Parents can make simple explanations. "In our car, you can ride facing forward, but in Aunt Judy's car, you're safer if you face the back." I would not be bothered by someone wanting my kid to ride differently in their car than I allow in mine, provided I didn't feel that my child's safety was compromised by the change.


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## wonderwahine (Apr 21, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MeepyCat* 
I would not be bothered by someone wanting my kid to ride differently in their car than I allow in mine, provided I didn't feel that my child's safety was compromised by the change.

I would be, because there were very distinct reasons behind us going FF, and this mom may have them to, and just not want to tell the whole story.


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## JessicaS (Nov 18, 2001)

My car my rules.

My car will not start properly until all seatbelts and carseats are properly buckled (no..that isn't true I pretend my car won't start







)

The child in question is three, so there is some wiggle room here, I would definitely would try and negotiate with the child regarding RF if they were under 35 lbs. Plus, they'll be able to see the other child RF and bemoan their RF plight together so they might not freak out too badly.

IMO, if I could talk the child into RF without hysterical screaming and minor compromises like mirrors or silly songs then I would do it.

I do have OCD and get a little crazy when it comes to car safety. My seatbelt saved my life three years ago.

You can't predict what will happen. Someone fell asleep at the wheel and plowed into me on the highway.

RF did bother my dd for a time and we placed several mirrors on the ceiling of our car for her to watch.


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## JessicaS (Nov 18, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *wonderwahine* 
I would be, because there were very distinct reasons behind us going FF, and this mom may have them to, and just not want to tell the whole story.

A parent should feel be willing to explain things to someone who is going to have the responsibility of caring for their child. I haven't ever watched a child and not known their life story..but they were always my friend's kids so explanations weren't necessary.









If you want someone to be aware of the needs of your child then one would have to explain and be willing to explain so they can get the care that best suits them.


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## wonderwahine (Apr 21, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *abimommy* 
A parent should feel be willing to explain things to someone who is going to have the responsibility of caring for their child. I haven't ever watched a child and not known their life story..but they were always my friend's kids so explanations weren't necessary.









If you want someone to be aware of the needs of your child then one would have to explain and be willing to explain so they can get the care that best suits them.

this is true, but maybe shes just a private person..... either way, it was just a maybe, it might not be in this situation, but I think its a good thing to rememeber in future times when you are looking after anyones kids.


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## ThreeBeans (Dec 2, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *wonderwahine* 
this is true, but maybe shes just a private person..... either way, it was just a maybe, it might not be in this situation, but I think its a good thing to rememeber in future times when you are looking after anyones kids.

If someone wants me to look after their kids, and they are expressingly asking me to do something that isn't even CLOSE to best practice in terms of safety, they'd better have a reason. "Private person" isn't going to cut it.


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## JessicaS (Nov 18, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *wonderwahine* 
this is true, but maybe shes just a private person..... either way, it was just a maybe, it might not be in this situation, but I think its a good thing to rememeber in future times when you are looking after anyones kids.

Um, no if I am looking after someone's kids I want to be able to give them the care they require.

Every child is different and any reasonable person would try and do what they could to meet a child's needs if they were in their care. If someone isn't willing to provide me with the information I would be upset.

Say a child has a horrific fear of monkeys and I take them to the zoo, of course we are going to see all the apes. So, child gets hysterical and freaks, I mention it and THEN parent informs me they hate monkeys, well I am going to be angry because the whole situation could have been avoided in the first place, I wouldn't drag monkey hating children off to see the apes.

I do sometimes watch people's kids, but I have known them all for years so I have never had this problem. If I was watching a new acquaintances child I would require all the information I might need.

AP is about meeting the individual needs of the child. If someone is going to withhold information from me, thus taking away my ability to do that, then that wouldn't be fair to me or the child.


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## dallaschildren (Jun 14, 2003)

Thought I would just throw this out here again:

Quote:
Originally Posted by ThreeBeans
How much DOES he weigh?

Quote:


Originally Posted by *North_Of_60* 
30 pounds.

He is in a Marathon which RF to 33 pounds. So he is 3 years old and 3 pounds away from the RF weight limit on the Marathon.

So, OP, how did it go? Did you talk to her?


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## hottmama (Dec 27, 2004)

When I watch a friend's child, I let the parent decide how their kid will ride. Most people turn their kids around really early, at 12-18 mos. My 19 mo. old will be rfing for a long time and hopefully people will learn from the example we set. I do insist on booster seats in my car for 4-10 yr. old kids too short for the seatbelt, even if they've been out of a booster for years. The rule in my car is that everyone has to be secured to at least a certain safety minimum, whether that is a RFing carseat under 1/20 lbs (honestly, I'd say under 18 mos. but it has never come up), harness under 4, and booster seat until they fit right in the seatbelt. And seatbelts for all (I had to force my own mother to wear one when I visited last weekend!) But beyond the minimum all we can do is suggest a better way.
If you do turn the seat RFing, you'll probably have to change the harness height.


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## angie3096 (Apr 4, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *harleyhalfmoon* 
I have a question- how do you FIT a child who's that big (almost three- much taller than an infant) in a rear-facing position? I've never heard of that. As soon as my son was 20 pounds and a year (or whatever it is- it's been 11 years since I had to remember), I flipped him to forward facing. He wasn't a tall baby- he was average, but his legs and feet would get all crunched up and he was miserable.


My daughter rode rearfacing until she got too heavy to do so. She was over 3 years old at the time. She either crossed her legs or just bent her knees. Children are quite comfortable in that position. We know, because kids who are rearfacing at 3 years old can tell us so!

Here is a good video for you:





ETA: This might also help answer your question:
http://cpsafety.com/articles/RFAlbumAll.aspx


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## Synchro246 (Aug 8, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *harleyhalfmoon* 
I have a question- how do you FIT a child who's that big (almost three- much taller than an infant) in a rear-facing position? I've never heard of that. As soon as my son was 20 pounds and a year (or whatever it is- it's been 11 years since I had to remember), I flipped him to forward facing. He wasn't a tall baby- he was average, but his legs and feet would get all crunched up and he was miserable.

That being asked, if he's within the law's requirements, I don't think there's anything you can do about it but to tell his Mother that you're not comfortable with him forward facing. Maybe you can make it a game with the little boy and your daugher- count birds our the rearwiew window or something like that?

I know you've been bombarded already. I just thought this website with pictures of kids RF beyond the 1yr/20lb mark & a page with the reasons why might be nice to look at
http://www.cpsafety.com/


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## kblackstone444 (Jun 17, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *angie3096* 
My daughter rode rearfacing until she got too heavy to do so. She was over 3 years old at the time. She either crossed her legs or just bent her knees. Children are quite comfortable in that position. We know, because kids who are rearfacing at 3 years old can tell us so!

Here is a good video for you:





ETA: This might also help answer your question:
http://cpsafety.com/articles/RFAlbumAll.aspx


Quote:


Originally Posted by *Synchro246* 
I know you've been bombarded already. I just thought this website with pictures of kids RF beyond the 1yr/20lb mark & a page with the reasons why might be nice to look at
http://www.cpsafety.com/

See, this is very good to know, very interesting reading. Until I saw this post, I was unaware that anyone kept their child rear facing after a year and 20 pounds, Actually, to be honest, my son was a baby 12 years ago now, and he SCREAMED and struggled panic-like the entire time he was in his rearfacing car seat- I was praying for the day he turned one (he was 20 pounds at 5 months old, but as uneducated I was, I wasn't DUMB!) and as soon as he was a year old, I flipped him and he loved the car after that. If I had known then what I know now, I would have kept him rear facing longer and dealt with the screaming. My sister will be having her second child around Christmas time. I'm gonna mention it to her and send her a link to the video.


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## angie3096 (Apr 4, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *harleyhalfmoon* 
See, this is very good to know, very interesting reading. Until I saw this post, I was unaware that anyone kept their child rear facing after a year and 20 pounds, Actually, to be honest, my son was a baby 12 years ago now, and he SCREAMED and struggled panic-like the entire time he was in his rearfacing car seat- I was praying for the day he turned one (he was 20 pounds at 5 months old, but as uneducated I was, I wasn't DUMB!) and as soon as he was a year old, I flipped him and he loved the car after that. If I had known then what I know now, I would have kept him rear facing longer and dealt with the screaming. My sister will be having her second child around Christmas time. I'm gonna mention it to her and send her a link to the video.

You're so welcome, always happy to spread the word. My daughter didn't like being rearfacing either. She said she wasn't physically uncomfortable, she just wanted to sit like mom and see where we were going. And she did cry about it. But I preferred a pissed off child to a dead one, so I never caved!


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## KayleeZoo (Apr 8, 2003)

Chiming in late here, but I would definately tell her that in YOUR car, everyone rides as safely as possible, and for that child, RF is the safest. Period. I've done it with friends whose kids have ridden with us (including making a 6yo ride in a harnessed seat when she's used to a backless booster) and it's not always pleasant, but I will not compromise the safety of a child to prevent an awkward moment with a friend. And, if you were to be in an accident and that child were injured or killed (internal decapitation is MUCH more likely to happen to a FF child than a RF one), I can't imagine the guilt you'd feel for the rest of your life because you allowed him to ride in a less-safe position.


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## thepeach80 (Mar 16, 2004)

Here's an album full of kids rfing past 1/20#. Click on the pic for the full picture.
http://www.cpsafety.com/articles/RFalbum.aspx

Here's the cutest kid in the album right before he turned 3 (he went ffing at 34 mos and 34# and 36ish").
http://www.cpsafety.com/articles/RFAlbum/AJ.aspx

Here's a child who should be in the album. He's currently 32mos and 26# and almost 34" and still rfing.








http://s47.photobucket.com/albums/f1...t=IMG_1025.jpg


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