# What the *bleep* am I going to do with this?*Update* pg 4



## Hoopin' Mama (Sep 9, 2004)

Look what MIL got ds:

http://www.walmart.com/catalog/produ...uct_id=2620069










What I'm a supposed to do now, and where in heck am I supposed to store such a monstrosity????

And furthermore, why would someone purchase something so large without asking permission?

They come by every 6-8 weeks. Dh is usually on my side, and this doesn't thrill him, but I don't think getting rid of it immediately is an option right now.

There is no place to hide this thing, and of course ds is going to freakin' love it, he's going to want to "drive" it everyday. Our patio is not very big, and our cul-de-sac has a downward slope onto a busy street. What are we supposed to do, tackle the hummer every time he starts going towards the street???

Not to mention the fact that's it's a Hummer. Yeah, let's get 'em started young.

I don't know what to do about this, they are soooooo excited to give it to him.

Ugh.

ETA: I didn't mention, my son is only 2.


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## ThreeBeans (Dec 2, 2006)

Has he seen it yet? If not, DH calls his mum back and explains that this is simply not going to stay at your house, it's inappropriate, and dangerous, and not something your family values. Then ask her what she would like to do with it.

Eee gads, it's hideous


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## Hoopin' Mama (Sep 9, 2004)

It's really just.......I don't know, I'm speechless.

I am thinking of asking him to tell her it should be a toy for Grandma's house. There are quiet roads at their house that are safe, she has the storage space, and we only go every other month or so.


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## lalaland42 (Mar 12, 2006)

I like the idea of keeping it at Grandma's house. Maybe call Grandma and tell her that safety is a concern and tell her that her house would be a better idea since you are afraid of DS going in the street. I would hate it too but the only grandparent in my family knows I hate SUVs.


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## Hoopin' Mama (Sep 9, 2004)

I've figured out what to do!

The next time one of my neighbors donates to the cancer society, I'm going to leave it out on their lawn


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## bobica (May 31, 2004)

lol ooooh, too much!









that would absolutely be a "stay at grandma's house" toy for us!







:


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## grahamsmom98 (May 15, 2002)

Quote:

_I've figured out what to do!

The next time one of my neighbors donates to the cancer society, I'm going to leave it out on their lawn_
Well, I think that is plain rude, not to mention cowardly. They thought enough to want to spend some money on your child and you hand it off to the neighbors as a freebie? If I was your mil, I'd be hurt and angry at your total dishonesty and callousness toward a well-meaning gift.

If you don't want your child to have it (by the way, it is listed for children age 3 years and up, so your son is too young for it anyway), show some backbone and tell them honestly. Thank them for the thought and ask that they return it and get their money back as it just isn't something you want your child to have.

Tell them you appreciate the idea (they were just trying to do something nice, for gosh sake, not ruin your child) but that it just isn't the right time for such a toy. That you don't have the room for it at your place nor a safe area for it to be used and that your child is too young for such an active toy in any case.

And, if you son't like it for your child at your place, don't be a hypocrit and allow it at their place. Don't want your child to have the toy? Then don't allow him to have it anywhere.


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## Momily (Feb 15, 2007)

Could you give it to him and not let him know about the batteries? My son had several noisy toys given to him at that age that I never put batteries in, I don't think he ever noticed.

Without the batteries it would be a cool thing to climb on, sit in, use his imagination while he pretends to drive, (although still a Hummer -- Yuck) but wouldn't be as much of a safety hazard.

When your MIL in law comes you can just tell her the batteries are "charging".


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## mommajb (Mar 4, 2005)

too funny (about the donation). I say keep it at grandma's - there is no way I want something that bothers me so much in my home.


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## shelbean91 (May 11, 2002)

Either return it or let it live at grandmas.


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## ThreeBeans (Dec 2, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Hoopin' Mama* 
I've figured out what to do!

The next time one of my neighbors donates to the cancer society, I'm going to leave it out on their lawn


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## ThreeBeans (Dec 2, 2006)

Btw, a gift is for the giftee to do with as she pleases. There is nothing cowardly or rude about giving it away.


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## Hoopin' Mama (Sep 9, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *grahamsmom98* 
Well, I think that is plain rude, not to mention cowardly. They thought enough to want to spend some money on your child and you hand it off to the neighbors as a freebie? If I was your mil, I'd be hurt and angry at your total dishonesty and callousness toward a well-meaning gift.

Not that I place monetary value on gifts, but they picked it up at a second hand store for under $20. I was surprised when I saw the price tag on the Wal-Mart link.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *grahamsmom98* 
Tell them you appreciate the idea (they were just trying to do something nice, for gosh sake, not ruin your child) but that it just isn't the right time for such a toy. That you don't have the room for it at your place nor a safe area for it to be used and that your child is too young for such an active toy in any case.

And, if you son't like it for your child at your place, don't be a hypocrit and allow it at their place. Don't want your child to have the toy? Then don't allow him to have it anywhere.











Yes, if it were only that simple that I can pick up the phone and tell my MIL my honest feelings without some backlash and causing family drama.

So far you've called me callous, rude, spineless, cowardly, dishonest and a hypocrite. I'm mildly amused by that.

Quite frankly, I would think this a toy that would make most MDC'ers shudder, judging from what I understand the purpose statement of Mothering to be.

By the way, I never said she was trying to ruin my child. I can save all that for another thread


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## Hoopin' Mama (Sep 9, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Momily* 
Could you give it to him and not let him know about the batteries? My son had several noisy toys given to him at that age that I never put batteries in, I don't think he ever noticed.

Without the batteries it would be a cool thing to climb on, sit in, use his imagination while he pretends to drive, (although still a Hummer -- Yuck) but wouldn't be as much of a safety hazard.

When your MIL in law comes you can just tell her the batteries are "charging".

That's a fabulous idea, but quite simply we don't really have the space. I guess we can make some, but it's getting crowded out there on that patio. The rest of our yard is prickly desert, with scorpions and quite possibly rattlesnakes. When we have the money, we are expanding our fenced in area and tearing out all the ouchies that live there.


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## Hoopin' Mama (Sep 9, 2004)

I would like to add, I'm not fuming mad or anything. I'm almost laughing about it because the toy seems so crazy to me. I also giggle everytime I picture myself tackling the hummer when ds tries to drive it into the street.


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## jjawm (Jun 17, 2007)

I love the idea of having it at grandma's house, especially if you explain the danger of your street.

Good luck


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## shelbean91 (May 11, 2002)

Well, heck, if it's a hummer, it's probably as big as the regular cars on the street, right?? Maybe the other drivers wouldn't notice.


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## pigpokey (Feb 23, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *grahamsmom98* 
Well, I think that is plain rude, not to mention cowardly. They thought enough to want to spend some money on your child and you hand it off to the neighbors as a freebie? If I was your mil, I'd be hurt and angry at your total dishonesty and callousness toward a well-meaning gift.

You can't please MIL's as easily as you think. Mine bought me a couple of items of clothing once, handed it to me in the shopping back. I tried them on and they didn't fit so I (politely) asked her if she wanted to take them back. Three years later or so she told me how horrible I was and that I should have just said thank-you and gotten rid of them after she left.


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## lilyka (Nov 20, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Hoopin' Mama* 
It's really just.......I don't know, I'm speechless.

I am thinking of asking him to tell her it should be a toy for Grandma's house. There are quiet roads at their house that are safe, she has the storage space, and we only go every other month or so.


perfect!

explain to her that you have no where t store it, no where to ride it but you know ds is going to just love it. It would be the perfect thing for grandma and grandpa to share with him at their house.


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## sunflowers (Sep 24, 2006)

How about removing the innards-the seats, steering wheel, ect- and putting a small mattress in it to make a toddler bed? Looks big enough to pull such a feat off!


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## Neldavi (Jun 28, 2005)

Oh no. I haven't read any of the other replies, but I would be LIVID if someone did that. This is why I've been so obnoxiously vocal with family since the beginning about what my values are and what kinds of things I do and don't want in MY house.

I would say "no, thank you, our house is really too small for that. here are some alternative things he would love to have"

If it is really truly too late to cancel or return the order (although you should be able to return it once it comes) maybe you have a friend who would want it?


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## Vypros (Apr 10, 2007)

How about you keep it, appreciate the gesture, let your son play with it cause you KNOW he's going to have a blast with it, and watch him when he rides it?


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## Kajira (May 23, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Vypros* 
How about you keep it, appreciate the gesture, let your son play with it cause you KNOW he's going to have a blast with it, and watch him when he rides it?

how about she not.
Kids move FAST, going down hill the move faster, into traffic no way I was keeping it at my house.
Plus if she has very little space, and the back is unsafe, it should go to grandma's house, he can have a blast there in a safer atmosphere.

My MIL who knows how I feel about hummers would have never made that gesture, I guess there's something about being the crazy b***h DIL, cause mine knows I'd sell/gift/donate it, and has gotten in line with my picks


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## LeftField (Aug 2, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jjawm* 
I love the idea of having it at grandma's house, especially if you explain the danger of your street.

Good luck









Yes, do this. I would thank them, but then say that you don't have a place to store it and that there's no safe place for him to drive it...but that you thought it would be a fun toy to use at Grandma's. I say this as a person who absolutely abhors driving toys for kids, but since you have some drama potential with your ILs, just phrase it along those lines...


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## Neldavi (Jun 28, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Hoopin' Mama* 
I would like to add, I'm not fuming mad or anything. I'm almost laughing about it because the toy seems so crazy to me. I also giggle everytime I picture myself tackling the hummer when ds tries to drive it into the street.

Well that's good ... I'm mad for you though









And now that I see it's secondhand and can't be returned I guess the grandma house option is the best. I would have my dh (if it was me) tell her that if she can't take it it will be given away and to please check with us in the future.


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## cycle (Nov 18, 2004)

I would just tell her as nicely as possible that it is not the kind of toy you want your son to have. I can't believe she would buy something like this without asking you. This would p*ss me off - I struggle, it seems like daily, with my mom buying ds crap. It really is disrespectful when I ask her over and over and over to not buy ds anything - but if she must it cannot be plastic, battery operated, etc....

I wouldn't keep it at home or at Grandmas.


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## Vypros (Apr 10, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kajira* 
how about she not.
Kids move FAST, going down hill the move faster, into traffic no way I was keeping it at my house.
Plus if she has very little space, and the back is unsafe, it should go to grandma's house, he can have a blast there in a safer atmosphere.

My MIL who knows how I feel about hummers would have never made that gesture, I guess there's something about being the crazy b***h DIL, cause mine knows I'd sell/gift/donate it, and has gotten in line with my picks

Have you ever seen one of these things move? They don't go that fast at all, even downhill. The wheels only turn due to the mechanics of the motor propelling it. When it is sitting still, it's near impossible to move cause the wheels aren't "loose".

And I don't get the hate for hummers here, which is why I think this is a big deal. I know they aren't environmentally friendly or whatever, but it's not like a toy for a two year old:

1. Is going to affect the upbringing you give them
2. Suddenly make it so that the child can afford a hummer when he/she grows up.


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## rere (Apr 21, 2005)

.


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## GuildJenn (Jan 10, 2007)

I love your idea, but I also think you could paint it with all kinds of save the planet slogans and take it to Earth Day rallies... although maybe it would disturb your son if you graffitied "PLANET KILLER" on the back of it


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## edamommy (Apr 6, 2004)

wow- what a fun thing for the kids! My ds has a big thing like that and we moved to a condo type area and now we leave it at his great grandmother's so he can ride it on her big yard when we go over to visit.


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## Hoopin' Mama (Sep 9, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Vypros* 
How about you keep it, appreciate the gesture, let your son play with it cause you KNOW he's going to have a blast with it, and watch him when he rides it?


That would be nice, but not so easy knowing my son. If he likes it, which I think he will, he will want to ride it all the time. Not just when we are able to bring it out on the cul-de-sac under supervision. I see this resulting in some tantrum issues. My husband and I work around each other's schedule, so there is only one adult home at a time. Other things need to be done, like walking the dog, making dinner, doing laundry, etc. I know my child, and I know that he will want to play with it ALL the time. Well, at least for a week or two.
The way my house is structured, he can play with his trike, wagon, or sandbox on the patio while I am in the kitchen or outside doing laundry.


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## Neldavi (Jun 28, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Vypros* 
And I don't get the hate for hummers here, which is why I think this is a big deal. I know they aren't environmentally friendly or whatever, but it's not like a toy for a two year old:

1. Is going to affect the upbringing you give them
2. Suddenly make it so that the child can afford a hummer when he/she grows up.

To me, a Hummer, and by extension a child's replica of a Hummer, represents the excess and arrogance of American culture. That's not something I want my child playing with on a daily basis. I feel like if I let that into my home it's telling my child that this thing is something that I like and value ...

So yes, that is affecting the upbringing I give my child.

And about affording a Hummer, no, they may not be able to, but that's not the point. I don't want my child to WANT a Hummer, regardless of whether they can actually have one or not.


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## sofiabugmom (Sep 23, 2003)

You're taking this much better than I would. IMO, if Grandma thinks this is a such a terrific toy for your DS, then she should be willing to keep it in her house for him to play with.


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## Hoopin' Mama (Sep 9, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Vypros* 
Have you ever seen one of these things move? They don't go that fast at all, even downhill. The wheels only turn due to the mechanics of the motor propelling it. When it is sitting still, it's near impossible to move cause the wheels aren't "loose".

And I don't get the hate for hummers here, which is why I think this is a big deal. I know they aren't environmentally friendly or whatever, but it's not like a toy for a two year old:

1. Is going to affect the upbringing you give them
2. Suddenly make it so that the child can afford a hummer when he/she grows up.

I believe Hummers to be environmentally irresponsible and unnecessary. I aspire to raise my child in an environmentally responsible environment. If he develops a love for Hummers on his own, so be it. I am not inclined to encourage him to think they are cool. I don't know why this seems so out there? Plenty of parents don't want to buy guns or Bratz dolls for their kids.

Anyway, space and safety is the real issue. The fact that it's a Hummer is secondary. And no, I haven't seen these things move.

Thanks for some of the good suggestions from most of you! Keeping it at Grandmas is first choice, where he can enjoy on safe quiet road and in a long driveway, keeping it here without batteries is second.

I am unsure why some folks responded like I'm the wicked witch of the west for not wanting this in my home. I have no intention of turning this into a family issue or being unkind to my IL's. I just thought this would be a safe place for me to vent. Also, I thought some of you might laugh. I mean, seriously, isn't this toy a little outrageous? I think so, at least. And I am not a super crunchy person by any means.

For ds' first birthday, MIL gave him (among other things) a time-out bench and the paddle that she used to spank dh with. I didn't react rudely to that, I'm certainly not going to be rude to them over this.

They got him a license plate for it that says 2Fast4U


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## Hoopin' Mama (Sep 9, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Neldavi* 
To me, a Hummer, and by extension a child's replica of a Hummer, represents the excess and arrogance of American culture. That's not something I want my child playing with on a daily basis. I feel like if I let that into my home it's telling my child that this thing is something that I like and value ...

So yes, that is affecting the upbringing I give my child.

And about affording a Hummer, no, they may not be able to, but that's not the point. I don't want my child to WANT a Hummer, regardless of whether they can actually have one or not.

Well said. Thanks for getting where I am coming from.


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## onlyzombiecat (Aug 15, 2004)

I think having it live at Grandma's house is the best solution.
Otherwise get rid of it.


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## Doodlebugsmom (Aug 1, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Vypros* 
Have you ever seen one of these things move? They don't go that fast at all, even downhill. The wheels only turn due to the mechanics of the motor propelling it. When it is sitting still, it's near impossible to move cause the wheels aren't "loose".


I noticed that this particular Hummer has a 12 volt battery. (Most driving toys for kids have a 6 volt.) And it has two speeds 2.5 mph and 5 mph. 5 mph is pretty darn fast for a 2 year old. Ds has a 12 volt Kawasaki dirtbike riding toy. I can't even take him out on it. It FLIES going downhill, and we live in a very hilly neighborhood. It's also very heavy. I've almost been knocked over and run over when I tried to stop it. Needless to say, dh is the only one who takes him out on it now.

OP: I'm with you on keeping it at grandma's house. I think that seems like the best solution.


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## Nature (Mar 12, 2005)

Totally unsafe for a 2 year old. My sister in law has one for her kids and I will not allow my 4 year old to drive it because its really hard to control and um.. she's 4. No way would I allow a 2 year old to drive it. Let them concentrate on learning how to walk without tripping, falling into the wall, falling on their face.. ...









If I was gifted that, I'd put it outside and turn it into a planter.







You haven't wasted the gift, you've simply given it a new use!!







:


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## Kajira (May 23, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Vypros* 
Have you ever seen one of these things move? They don't go that fast at all, even downhill. The wheels only turn due to the mechanics of the motor propelling it. When it is sitting still, it's near impossible to move cause the wheels aren't "loose".

And I don't get the hate for hummers here, which is why I think this is a big deal. I know they aren't environmentally friendly or whatever, but it's not like a toy for a two year old:

1. Is going to affect the upbringing you give them
2. Suddenly make it so that the child can afford a hummer when he/she grows up.

well actually I have, one of the kids in the block across from my dad has one, and they drive it around on sundays so I've seen it in action for a while now, these things do not move slow, they are pretty swift from what I've seen, I wouldn't allow my 2 year old in it.

You know my other issue is no the child may not grow up and be able to afford a hummer, well right out of school







BUT it's teaching them to associate bigger is better/more fun.
It's indoctrinating that this old hulking beast is just fine and normal, and it ain't!!
My family, my morals and my rules, go find the kiddy vw bug.


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## myjulybabes (Jun 24, 2003)

You mention a patio...how big is the backyard? Or is it just the patio? Those things will drive on grass, so maybe just driving it around the yard would be possible?

If not, it needs to go live at Grandma's. Maybe minus the Hummer decals.







I mean really, if she's got the storage space and a safer place to drive it, it just makes sense. There was no reason to bring it to your house in the first place.

Oh, and we have a Power Wheels Jeep...you CAN "lock out" the high gear, and I definitely would, no matter where you keep the thing. (on ours, there's a screw that goes through the gear shift that you have to take out to access "high") 5mph doesn't sound very fast, until they take off on you, headed for the street.


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## mommy2abigail (Aug 20, 2005)

First, ITA that they are not a great toy, and not safe and all that. BUT, boy would I have KILLED for one when I was a kid!!! A few friends had one when I was younger, and I wanted one SOOOOOOOO bad. We actually got dd one from a yard sale because *I* remember wanting one so much. She didn't get it at first, and when she did, it lost it's fun factor really fast. We live in a very safe cul de sac, so she was able to ride it quite a bit, but it was boring for her to rude it all alone. So we then gave it away to charity. I say take it to Grandma's house, and it will maintain its fun factor a little longer. HTH


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## staceychev (Mar 5, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mommy2abigail* 
BUT, boy would I have KILLED for one when I was a kid!!! A few friends had one when I was younger, and I wanted one SOOOOOOOO bad.











We got the FAO Schwartz catalog when I was a kid, featuring the ultra cool, scale model, actually-working cars (this was a big deal back then in the late 70's and early 80's--you couldn't buy those things at the regular toystore!). I begged my dad for one and Dad, in his infinite wisdom, said "You can have one for your thirteenth birthday." Ha. Wise dad knew that I wouldn't (a) fit in one or (b) want one when I was thirteen.


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## treqi (Dec 31, 2006)

I was not allowed one my mom thought they were to dangerous and iI was 7 when I started asking, that would be a DEFINATE NO for a 3 yo even my MIL thinks theyre dangerous and when she found one at a garage sale for my niece she took the battery out.


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## Zach'smom (Nov 5, 2004)

Did you MIL buy this with good intentions or does she know you don't approve of such toys and buy it to spite you?

If she did it with good intentions I would say let her keep it as a Grandma house toy. If you are comfortable with your 2 yo in it.

If she did it to be nasty I would just say "no". In a diplomatic way of course.









It looks like a fun toy for kids, but a nightmare for parents!


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## jdedmom (Jul 11, 2006)

We have a Power Wheels Jeep, a John Deere Gator and a Power Wheels motor cycle. The boys love them. My almost 3 year old can not steer the Jeep so he's not allowed to ride that one. My uncle pulled the motorcycle out of the trash and we replaced the battery.

If you have a big yard or live on a steet that is not too busy I think that they are fun.


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## Doodlebugsmom (Aug 1, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jdedmom* 
We have a Power Wheels Jeep, a John Deere Gator and a Power Wheels motor cycle. The boys love them. My almost 3 year old can not steer the Jeep so he's not allowed to ride that one. My uncle pulled the motorcycle out of the trash and we replaced the battery.

If you have a big yard or live on a steet that is not too busy I think that they are fun.









I agree! Ds is 3, and he rides the little Kawasaki like a champ. (Of course, he does want to race motocross professionally when he grows up.







) Dd is 5, and she can't steer the thing at all. She's content to ride on the back while ds does the driving.


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## Neldavi (Jun 28, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kajira* 

BUT it's teaching them to associate bigger is better/more fun.
It's indoctrinating that this old hulking beast is just fine and normal, and it ain't!!









Exactly


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## Zach'smom (Nov 5, 2004)

I think we'll just stick with the old fashioned kid-powered toys. Bikes, scooter, flying turtle, wagon, etc.


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## Quinalla (May 23, 2005)

Sounds like making it a toy for Grandma's house is a good option, since the space/safety is the biggest concern for you. It is odd to buy a gift that large without any notice for sure.


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## devster4fun (Jan 28, 2007)

Skimmed replies. To OP:

I totally see your point....now.

Just a tiny defense for Gma...before I had a child, I bought my Nephew something like this. (although NOT a Hummer!!) I had never thought about how much space it would take, safety etc... I just had never had kids or been around kids and didn't know. And, it looked like so much fun and I would be like, the "cool" Aunt









I guess Gma can't give that same excuse, but I think her heart was in the right place.

fwiw...I think you, as the Mom, should decide whatever is best for your family.


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## lovingmommyhood (Jul 28, 2006)

I see nothing wrong with it. If you don't want it, tell them you want to keep it at their house. Simple.

The "argument" that if they have a toy hummer as a child they will buy one when they're older is just silly.


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## NaomiMcC (Mar 22, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Momily* 
Could you give it to him and not let him know about the batteries? My son had several noisy toys given to him at that age that I never put batteries in, I don't think he ever noticed.

Without the batteries it would be a cool thing to climb on, sit in, use his imagination while he pretends to drive, (although still a Hummer -- Yuck) but wouldn't be as much of a safety hazard.

When your MIL in law comes you can just tell her the batteries are "charging".

That's a good idea.


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## NaomiMcC (Mar 22, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lovingmommyhood* 
I see nothing wrong with it. If you don't want it, tell them you want to keep it at their house. Simple.

The "argument" that if they have a toy hummer as a child they will buy one when they're older is just silly.









:


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## PrennaMama (Oct 10, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Hoopin' Mama* 
It's really just.......I don't know, I'm speechless.

I am thinking of asking him to tell her it should be a toy for Grandma's house. There are quiet roads at their house that are safe, she has the storage space, and we only go every other month or so.

Great idea! My mom has a cache of toys at her place for the girls (both 2) some of them are similar monstrosities... she knows those live at her place. She's cool with it; there are _special_ things at Nana's place!

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Hoopin' Mama* 
By the way, I never said she was trying to ruin my child. I can save all that for another thread



















Quote:


Originally Posted by *Hoopin' Mama* 
Anyway, space and safety is the real issue. The fact that it's a Hummer is secondary. And no, I haven't seen these things move.
<snip>
For ds' first birthday, MIL gave him (among other things) a time-out bench and the paddle that she used to spank dh with. I didn't react rudely to that, I'm certainly not going to be rude to them over this.

They got him a license plate for it that says 2Fast4U

I was about to ask what the bottom line was, and you answered it. If you don't take issue with the Hummer gift philosophically, and it's just a safety/space issue, as far as your place is concerned, then leaving it g'ma's seems the best option. If it's a moral thing, that is, it doesn't sit with your values, then say something, so she knows not to get this manner of toy in the future.

If you loathe it and can't or won't keep it at G'ma's... sell it on eBay! Then get him some things you dig.

Re; the paddle and naughty-bench...omg. That you could be cool as a cucumber is a reflection of what an evolved person you are... wow. Did you have a ritual burning of the paddle and bench, later??

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Zach'smom* 
I think we'll just stick with the old fashioned kid-powered toys. Bikes, scooter, flying turtle, wagon, etc.









I wanted one of these too, as a kid... my dad thought that toys like this were what made some kids get fat. He wasn't into them. Funny enough, dh feels the exact same way and equates juvenile obesity to being spoiled by "toys that doing the playing for them."


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## srbushey (Sep 27, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Momily* 
Could you give it to him and not let him know about the batteries? My son had several noisy toys given to him at that age that I never put batteries in, I don't think he ever noticed.

Without the batteries it would be a cool thing to climb on, sit in, use his imagination while he pretends to drive, (although still a Hummer -- Yuck) but wouldn't be as much of a safety hazard.

When your MIL in law comes you can just tell her the batteries are "charging".

ROFL! I know now why my parents never could "afford" batteries when we were children! We had all these toys that wouldn't do what they were supposed to because guess what, no batteries!!! That's the best idea I've seen yet. That is, if you really are sure you simply CAN'T tell MIL the truth or somehow get her to take it back.


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## alaskaberry (Dec 29, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Hoopin' Mama* 

What I'm a supposed to do now, and where in heck am I supposed to store such a monstrosity????

Have your MIL store it at *her* house, so he can play with it every time he goes over there. Just tell her straight out, you appreciate her generosity but you've nowhere to put it and it's dangerous for him to play with it in your neighborhood.


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## littlemizflava (Oct 8, 2006)

aww i want one for my dd


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## momto l&a (Jul 31, 2002)

Appeal to your MIL in the way of safety.

There is no place safe for your ds to ride it at your home. Thus they must keep it at their place.

My dd want one of those types of cars so badly, but the $$$ made dh say no.


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## Hoopin' Mama (Sep 9, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *PrennaMama* 
I was about to ask what the bottom line was, and you answered it. If you don't take issue with the Hummer gift philosophically, and it's just a safety/space issue, as far as your place is concerned, then leaving it g'ma's seems the best option. If it's a moral thing, that is, it doesn't sit with your values, then say something, so she knows not to get this manner of toy in the future.

Re; the paddle and naughty-bench...omg. That you could be cool as a cucumber is a reflection of what an evolved person you are... wow. Did you have a ritual burning of the paddle and bench, later?

I do take issue with Hummers, but honestly I wouldn't care if it said Prius on it. It's not safe for a 2yr old IMO, and we don't have the space. Not to mention, I am actively trying to reduce the amount of plastic that moves through our lives. I'm not a purist. I didn't say anything about the gigantic plastic pirate ship/toybox they bought him that now resides in ds' bedroom.

Dh pulled the TIME OUT letters of the bench, painted it, and now it sits on the patio for ds. I don't know where the paddle went, but for a while ds used it to hit balloons around.

I don't think they do it on purpose to bug me, but they do also know I don't like it. When they told me about it, stepFIL started the conversation laughing and saying "You're really going to hate us for this -- guess what we got him?"

I am going to have an honest, gentle, conversation with MIL and explain my concerns and why it should stay at their house. I won't even bring up the Hummer issue because they already think I'm







: Or as she puts is "we know how you are".

If they insist on bringing it here, then I will insist that battery be removed before it arrives so ds does not see it move. Once he sees that it moves, it's all over. They are excited to see him drive it, so I think that will settle the problem.

Regardless of my feelings, I try real hard not to deprive them of having fun with my child. But the size of this makes it a little exceptional. I usually try to keep the peace.


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## Hoopin' Mama (Sep 9, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *littlemizflava* 
aww i want one for my dd










I take funded paypal.

KIDDING!


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## PrennaMama (Oct 10, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Hoopin' Mama* 
I do take issue with Hummers, but honestly I wouldn't care if it said Prius on it. It's not safe for a 2yr old IMO, and we don't have the space. Not to mention, I am actively trying to reduce the amount of plastic that moves through our lives. I'm not a purist. I didn't say anything about the gigantic plastic pirate ship/toybox they bought him that now resides in ds' bedroom.

Dh pulled the TIME OUT letters of the bench, painted it, and now it sits on the patio for ds. I don't know where the paddle went, but for a while ds used it to hit balloons around.

I don't think they do it on purpose to bug me, but they do also know I don't like it. When they told me about it, stepFIL started the conversation laughing and saying "You're really going to hate us for this -- guess what we got him?"

I am going to have an honest, gentle, conversation with MIL and explain my concerns and why it should stay at their house. I won't even bring up the Hummer issue because they already think I'm







: Or as she puts is "we know how you are".

If they insist on bringing it here, then I will insist that battery be removed before it arrives so ds does not see it move. Once he sees that it moves, it's all over. They are excited to see him drive it, so I think that will settle the problem.

Regardless of my feelings, I try real hard not to deprive them of having fun with my child. But the size of this makes it a little exceptional. I usually try to keep the peace.

You know that when thay saw that, and saw how low it was priced, they said to each other, "she's gonna hate this" and gleefully bought it.

Just wondering (half-joking here) what do you think would happen if you were to be as cavaleir about their feelings as they seem to be about yours. or your preferences... I mean, what if you said:

"You're gonna hate me for this, I know, but I sold that Hummer on eBay and donated half the $ to the Biodeisel folks! The other half was used to go on a picnic in the woods. Ha ha!"
"I know you're gonna hate me for this, but the only way ds will get the joy of riding that sucker is at your house... (laughing, smiling benignly) Bring it here, and I can't promise he'll even know it exists... Ha ha!"
Would they laugh with you and say, "That's ok dear! We'll keep it at our place."?


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## GranoLLLy-girl (Mar 1, 2005)

Boy do you have a good heart for putting up with your ILs--especially when they make comments regarding that they 'know how you are'.
WTH?
This will make you laugh--dh bought dd (who is 5-not 2--that's too young) one of those things but it's a pink jeep (he drives a jeep as his transportation).
One day, dd had a pink plastic phone in one hand that rings until you 'answer' it and she was driving pink plastic jeep and trying to 'pretend' talk on the phone with the other hand...as she was riding around in the back yard dh yelled: hang up the phone and watch where you are going! And just then she hit a tree. She wasn't injured, we have the jeep set on the slowest setting and the yard is thick brush and sand--but the look on her face was priceless--phone in hand, hitting a tree. I certainly hope this is not in our future! It won't be so funny then--but it was funny in the moment.
I agree with all the other posters who say leave it granny's--especially since ds is so young. And like others, my dd is over the jeep and rarely even looks at it--it is now in the garage covered with beach stuff (towels, etc.).
Like you, I wasn't thrilled about it--but it did come from a garage sale and the thrill didn't last long--and it will soon be back in another yard sale, I'm sure.


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## Hoopin' Mama (Sep 9, 2004)

Dh said he has been dropping hints to the family that the Hummer is not coming here.

Meanwhile, they came down this past weekend. When they mentioned the Hummer, I told them my concerns. They said he is definitely getting it for his third birthday, he will be old enough then (birthday is 3 months away). I told them then there are two choices: It can stay here with no batteries, and he can have fun just pretending to drive, or it can stay at their house and we can leave the battery in and he can drive it on their streets when we visit.

So, the ball's in their court I guess.

On a side note: My MIL brought me a Dobson book, Dare To Discipline. My immediate reaction was honest and strong, somewhere along the lines of "I cannot have that book in my house!"
MIL did not take offense, and said that it was her copy from when dh was little, but I am up on current stuff, so I know best







Definitely a break through, and we had a good honest conversation.

Dh, on the other hand, knows how to use his dry wit. His comment was "oh, this must be what Dad read before he started hitting us.". MIL can't stand her ex-husband and thinks he is mean, so I think it hit home.


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## Hoopin' Mama (Sep 9, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *grahamsmom98* 
And, if you son't like it for your child at your place, don't be a hypocrit and allow it at their place. Don't want your child to have the toy? Then don't allow him to have it anywhere.

BTW, how dare you call me a hypocrite for trying not to create drama!

Maybe that's _*your*_ style, but I'm a bridge-builder







:


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## tm2840 (Feb 23, 2005)

Totally OT, but funny. As to the question

Quote:

Have you ever seen one of these things move? They don't go that fast at all, even downhill.
the answer is....

Pretty dang fast when grandpa removes the "governor" that limits the speed.







:

When we lived in the country the grandson of our neighbor had one of these. He was two or so, DS was three. That two year old could really drive that thing - my poor DS was hopeless, even controlling trikes.

Anyway, after the kid got pretty good with handling the jeep his grandpa removed the governor so it would go as fast as its little 12 volts would take it. Ralph Nader take that! :nana:

We moved and I hadn't seen the kid in a few years. Ran into him at the impromptu local 4th of July parade (the first since the civil war in this town, btw). He was driving a John Deere lawn tractor in the parade.

He's six years old.

We all come from different places. This kid was ready and able to drive that thing (and they had the safe place to do it). AND they kept it at their home! It doesn't suit me (space and the fact that it seems like the kind of toy that my kids would love for a while, then forget about until friends came over who wanted to play on it and THEN we'd be having a lot of "sharing" conversations because it would suddenly seem cool again).


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## jeteaa (Jan 23, 2007)

I think once a person becomes a grandparent, they lose some brain cells and grow more heart cells.


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## marybethorama (Jun 9, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Hoopin' Mama* 
Maybe that's _*your*_ style, but I'm a bridge-builder







:

You handled it perfectly


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## dis (May 21, 2005)

Question: it only cost $20, so are they even sure it actually works? I just can't imagine one of those things, even used, being priced so low. I'd bet money the battery probably barely holds a charge and that's why it was so cheap.


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## sofiabugmom (Sep 23, 2003)

I think the choices you laid out were very sound and fair. Glad to hear your inlaws were willing to listen to you. Especially MIL on discipline.


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## squishybear (Jul 11, 2007)

I think the options you gave were fair. There have been MANY MANY toys that when given to one of our kids and right away we said, you know this is staying here (grandma's house) don't you? And we would all laugh, and it would stay there. hahaha


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## Finch (Mar 4, 2005)

I just am in awe of you and your diplomacy skills.







If the dobson book didn't do it for me, the stupid time out bench and paddle certainly would have.









You are woman, I bow down to your awesome zen-like patience with these people.


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## rere (Apr 21, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Finch* 
I just am in awe of you and your diplomacy skills.







If the dobson book didn't do it for me, the stupid time out bench and paddle certainly would have.









You are woman, I bow down to your awesome zen-like patience with these people.























Yeh,after reading this thread I think I'm in love with Hoopin' Mama.


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## Hoopin' Mama (Sep 9, 2004)

Aw, shucks







:

Believe me, after many IL visits I've done my fair share of









I do think MIL has been trying to meet me on common ground lately. And I am learning what I can control and what I need to let go.

I get a lot of help from the wise Mamas here


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## MtBikeLover (Jun 30, 2005)

I have not read any replies yet, but I had a very similar situation happen at our house. My parents bought a jeep about that size for my son when he was 2. I was livid....where was I going to put it, he is too young, how are they to buy such a large gift for my son without asking me, I would rather my son have toys that keeps him active versus just sitting, etc.

Well, you know what, my son LOVED it and once I saw how much enjoyment he got out of it I was so glad my parents bought it (because I never in a million years would have thought to purchase it). At 2.5, my son could drive it all over the neighborhood the right way and kept it right on the sidewalk. At 4.5, he still plays with it frequently. And the laughs that I hear when he is playing with his friends on it are priceless!!


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## Hayes (Nov 20, 2001)

The rule in our family is simple. You may give whatever gift you wish to my child. It is your money. However, if the gift is loud, big, obnoxious, or something I don't want in my home, then it will stay at the gift giver's home.


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## BelovedK (Jun 7, 2005)

Hi









several posts have been removed due to their reference to another thread and discussing moderator actions.

Quote:

Do not start a thread to discuss member behavior or *statements of members made in other threads* or to criticize another discussion on the boards. Do not post to a thread to take direct issue with a member. If you feel a member has posted or behaved inappropriately in a discussion, communicate directly with the member, moderator or administrator privately and refrain from potentially defaming discussion in a thread.
this makes the thread confusing.

The rest of the quote from the UA is a reminder to PM a mod rather than post to the thread if you are offended by the way you are treated in a thread. That's what we're here for









Kelly~


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## mommajb (Mar 4, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Hayes* 
The rule in our family is simple. You may give whatever gift you wish to my child. It is your money. However, if the gift is loud, big, obnoxious, or something I don't want in my home, then it will stay at the gift giver's home.

Pretty much sums it up doesn't it? I would also add that if Grand-Dad breaks the toy with a rubber mallet or a hammer or any other tool while trying to put it together the pieces are not going home with me for some non-existant garage sale. When will he stop?









Hoopin Mam, I am impressed with how civil and nice you are able to be in the face of so many 'ideas'.


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## Hoopin' Mama (Sep 9, 2004)

Well, it's here. In all it's bright yellow plastic glory.

So, no one wanted to listen to me, the just popped ds in it and let him go. He almost immediately took down 90 year old Nana, and then they took the keys away. Why this surprised them I dunno, because I told them over and over again it was not a good idea to just put him in and let him drive it.

Anyway, he doesn't care about it at all. He likes getting in and turning on the radio, that's about it. I really don't think he will care if it disappears tomorrow. I think we will keep it a little longer then sell it on Craigslist, and give them the money. They are pretty strapped for cash, and I think we can sell it for more than they bought it for.

I wonder what is coming down the pike for Christmas? Dh told his Mom today to please remember that the best things come in little packages.


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## lisac77 (May 27, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Hoopin' Mama* 
Well, it's here. In all it's bright yellow plastic glory.

So, no one wanted to listen to me, the just popped ds in it and let him go. *He almost immediately took down 90 year old Nana*, and then they took the keys away. Why this surprised them I dunno, because I told them over and over again it was not a good idea to just put him in and let him drive it.

Anyway, he doesn't care about it at all. He likes getting in and turning on the radio, that's about it. I really don't think he will care if it disappears tomorrow. I think we will keep it a little longer then sell it on Craigslist, and give them the money. They are pretty strapped for cash, and I think we can sell it for more than they bought it for.

I wonder what is coming down the pike for Christmas? Dh told his Mom today to please remember that the best things come in little packages.


OMG. That is so funny. Probably scary for dear Nana, though!

I think your DH's gentle reminder for his family was perfect though.


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## limabean (Aug 31, 2005)

Oh my -- what a let-down for the grandparents! The kid immediately does something dangerous just as the parents predicted, then promptly loses interest in the toy after allllll that build-up. I probably shouldn't, but ...


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## DreamsInDigital (Sep 18, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Hoopin' Mama* 
Well, it's here. In all it's bright yellow plastic glory.

So, no one wanted to listen to me, the just popped ds in it and let him go. *He almost immediately took down 90 year old Nana*, and then they took the keys away. Why this surprised them I dunno, because I told them over and over again it was not a good idea to just put him in and let him drive it.

Is it terrible that I started laughing so hard I have tears streaming down my face? Maybe now they'll get why it wasn't such a great idea.


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## Hoopin' Mama (Sep 9, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *DreamsInDigital* 
Is it terrible that I started laughing so hard I have tears streaming down my face? Maybe now they'll get why it wasn't such a great idea.


Yeah, since no one got hurt, it was pretty funny. Nana doesn't talk much because she is hard of hearing, but I imagine a string of cuss words going through her head.

Someone has video of it, the whole thing lasts maybe 90 seconds. The whole time he is yelling to the dog "Watch out". No one panned the camera to me, standing there looking horrified with my hand over my mouth.

I had already decided to get through that day, I was going to have some beers.


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## BelovedK (Jun 7, 2005)

I'm glad no one got hurt


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## anthasam (Aug 20, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *sofiabugmom* 
You're taking this much better than I would. IMO, if Grandma thinks this is a such a terrific toy for your DS, then she should be willing to keep it in her house for him to play with.









: I would be fuming!

We already made it clear to my MIL (impulse buyer of awful stuff including, but not limited to ridiculously oversized toys!) that anything we don't deem appropriate stays at her house, or we will donate it. End of story. She has 3 huge bags of toys at her house and a monster-sized playtent









I'm not compromising my values to make her happy.
(But then maybe I have more issues with my MIL than you do







)


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## anthasam (Aug 20, 2005)

I just read your update!

Sometimes I think certain family members get joy out of "crazy toddler antics". My heart would have been in my throat!!

Glad everyone is safe!


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## karina5 (Apr 15, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *DreamsInDigital* 
Is it terrible that I started laughing so hard I have tears streaming down my face? Maybe now they'll get why it wasn't such a great idea.

I know, that cracked me right up, too! Hoopin' Mama, I think you've handled the whole thing perfectly. Sometimes it is hard to stand up to parents that make silly choices about such things.

I can relate w/ you on several counts - not only does my mother think a toy is no good unless it makes a bunch of noise and flashing lights and crap







: but she also LOVES Dobson. (BARF)

And guess what, I love my mom. Sometimes it is hard to have that line of "picking your battles" and whatnot.

You've handled it great, and kept a good sense of humor. Kudos to you!!








back atcha.


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## angie7 (Apr 23, 2007)

Guess I am a weird one here b/c I plan to buy each of my twins one of these (not the hummer though) for their 3rd birthday. I always wanted one as a kid, so dang right, they are going to have one for each of them.


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## Hoopin' Mama (Sep 9, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *angie7* 
Guess I am a weird one here b/c I plan to buy each of my twins one of these (not the hummer though) for their 3rd birthday. I always wanted one as a kid, so dang right, they are going to have one for each of them.

Well that's fine, because it's a choice you are making. But it is pretty clear we are actively trying to move away from this kind of stuff. Imagine two large things you didn't like showing up in your small yard, when all your child really needs is a tricycle?

Two kids can easily fit in one car, if they decide to share. If you get two, that might be a fun game of bumper cars.


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## woobysma (Apr 20, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Hoopin' Mama* 
Well that's fine, because it's a choice you are making.

I agree. DS2 has a similar toy 4-wheeler, but it was something that DP bought him, _after_ checking with me. (actually, he got it for free... just had to buy the battery)

It's not the kind of toy you just buy for someone else's child w/o checking first, imo. I'd be PO'd, too.


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## PrennaMama (Oct 10, 2005)

*Hoopin* thanks for the update! Funny... and doesn't it feel a little bit good to be able to look at them and think "I told you so!" Even if you never actually say it, being right about your own child feels good. Lol!


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## MammaB21 (Oct 30, 2007)

Just had to give my support.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *grahamsmom98* 
Well, I think that is plain rude, not to mention cowardly. They thought enough to want to spend some money on your child and you hand it off to the neighbors as a freebie? If I was your mil, I'd be hurt and angry at your total dishonesty and callousness toward a well-meaning gift.

If you don't want your child to have it (by the way, it is listed for children age 3 years and up, so your son is too young for it anyway), show some backbone and tell them honestly. Thank them for the thought and ask that they return it and get their money back as it just isn't something you want your child to have.
Tell them you appreciate the idea (they were just trying to do something nice, for gosh sake, not ruin your child) but that it just isn't the right time for such a toy. That you don't have the room for it at your place nor a safe area for it to be used and that your child is too young for such an active toy in any case.

And, if you son't like it for your child at your place, don't be a hypocrit and allow it at their place. Don't want your child to have the toy? Then don't allow him to have it anywhere.

First, I don't think you are being disshonest by keeping the peace. I would be hurt by her dissregaurd to your feelings and parenting style.

Second, I don't think they were 'trying to ruin your child' but sounds like they are blaitantly questioning your parenting stlye, and your rightfull discisions as a mother. I don't think 'doing something nice' is reason to drop all personal veiws on a subject that you obviously feel uncomfutable about. IF that were the case, many of us would be compromising our veiws.

Third, You are NOT a hypocrit by asking them to keep it at their place. It is not black and white. By asking them to keep it at their house you are doing a few things:
1) allowing DS to enjoy the toy, and still keeping within a safe invironement appropriate for his age.
2) Keeping the large toy out of your house.
3) allowing room to explain to DS that some toys are for ocasional use, and not everyday use. (this can be a special event at grandparents home, giving them special time with him, etc.)
4) Standing your ground with MIL that you will not bend just because she made a 'nice' effort, but at the same time not placing judgement or taking away her right as a grandmother.

Way to go, and hang in there, stand your ground, and you are right to be respectfull, after all, she is Ds's grandma, and as different as the veiws may be, there should be a bridge of love and commen ground.


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## Britishmum (Dec 25, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Hoopin' Mama* 
Yeah, since no one got hurt, it was pretty funny. Nana doesn't talk much because she is hard of hearing, but I imagine a string of cuss words going through her head.

Someone has video of it, the whole thing lasts maybe 90 seconds. The whole time he is yelling to the dog "Watch out". No one panned the camera to me, standing there looking horrified with my hand over my mouth.

I had already decided to get through that day, I was going to have some beers.









OMG, you can sell it on craigslist before Christmas and make a profit, then you can send the video to one of those awful TV shows and get $$s for it. Come to think of it, I'd pay $$s for the laugh of seeing 90 yr old run over by the Hummer. You could set up a website and charge people to view. C'mon - be creative, make some money out of this fiasco!!


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## Parker'smommy (Sep 12, 2002)

Don't worry about it....he won't be able to reach the gas peddles. My 5 year old has a power wheels car and he drives it fine, but my 2.5 year old who is actually tall, can't reach the pedals correctly and can't put enough pressure on the gas pedals to even get the thing going....no worries....it won't be fun, he won't be able to do it!!!


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