# your parenting mantra: if it had to be tattooed on you (forever) what would it be?



## dauphinette (Nov 13, 2007)

I would love to know!

y'all go first cause I am actually unsure...


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## princesstutu (Jul 17, 2007)

"The best control is self-control."

or maybe

"Discipline means teaching. And, teaching is for future reference."


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## dauphinette (Nov 13, 2007)

oooh, the best control is self control..... that's good.


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## RedLeaf (Apr 10, 2009)

The days drag by but the years fly by so take time to enjoy it.


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## GuildJenn (Jan 10, 2007)

Experience is the best teacher.

or

Never give up, never surrender.


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## MamaChicken (Aug 21, 2006)

"Do what works, as long as it works. When it stops working, do something different."


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## Callimom (Sep 14, 2004)

Begin with the end in mind.


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

It's only for a season...


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## dauphinette (Nov 13, 2007)

I'm lovin this sooo much keep em comin


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## lovingmommyhood (Jul 28, 2006)

The days are long but the years are short.


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## Tjej (Jan 22, 2009)

carpe diem


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## ecoteat (Mar 3, 2006)

Breathe.


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## Magali (Jun 8, 2007)

Just when you think you know everything, you find out you don't.


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## A&A (Apr 5, 2004)

They grow up so fast.

(and my signature is my 2nd parenting mantra)


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## Honey693 (May 5, 2008)

breathe


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## cparkly (Jul 21, 2009)

only love


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## reezley (May 27, 2006)

Be the grownup


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## Viriditas (Aug 30, 2004)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *MamaChicken*
> 
> "Do what works, as long as it works. When it stops working, do something different."


Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Karenwith4*
> 
> Begin with the end in mind.


I think mine would be some sort of combination of these two, with something about respect and compassion mixed in.


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## mamazee (Jan 5, 2003)

Don't sweat the small stuff.


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## Drummer's Wife (Jun 5, 2005)

Never say never.


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## Smokering (Sep 5, 2007)

Never succuss a baby.


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## dauphinette (Nov 13, 2007)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *cparkly*
> 
> only love


this is the winner for me, this is the thing I want to remember the most and need to be reminded to keep in the fore front all. the. time.


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## *bejeweled* (Jul 16, 2003)

I'm following her lead.


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## *bejeweled* (Jul 16, 2003)

This is beautiful.








Quote:


> Originally Posted by *annettemarie*
> 
> It's only for a season...


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## Lisa1970 (Jan 18, 2009)

"This too shall pass." It applies to everything. When something is difficult, this applies. But unfortunately, even when things are wonderful, this also applies.


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## tifpaul (Nov 13, 2006)

"All I can control is my response."


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## ~pi (May 4, 2005)

My job is to raise him to be a good, kind young man, not to prevent him from ever being unhappy.

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *lovingmommyhood*
> 
> The days are long but the years are short.


We actually have this one very prominently displayed in a family location.


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## rightkindofme (Apr 14, 2008)

I'm your mom, not your friend.









To be fair I hope we will be friends when they are grown ups and I am trying to help them grow into awesome grown ups. But being the mom means doing unpopular things.


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## coldandsleepy (Aug 5, 2008)

It's washable/it'll dry.

I don't know how many times a day I say these to myself.


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## hjdmom24 (Mar 1, 2008)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *coldandsleepy*
> 
> It's washable/it'll dry.
> 
> I don't know how many times a day I say these to myself.


LOL that is perfect for me!!

These are all great..Idk if I could pick just one!


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## littlegreenlady (Nov 24, 2009)

Trust. Love. Let Go.

I said this in my head often for a while during more challenging moments, I'd actually forgotten about it until I saw this thread.

Thank you for the reminder.


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## MountainMamaGC (Jun 23, 2008)

Pick your battles wisely.


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## nursemom2 (Oct 16, 2004)

"every star shines differently"


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## samstress (Feb 21, 2008)

well, it's similar to what someone else said, but...

"the days are long, but the years are short"


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## samstress (Feb 21, 2008)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *samstress*
> 
> well, it's similar to what someone else said, but...
> 
> "the days are long, but the years are short"


actually, it's exactly what someone else said. oops, sorry, didn't read them all before i posted.


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## Babina's Mommy (Dec 27, 2008)

Breastfeeding for all, circumcision for none.


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## bec (Dec 13, 2002)

Kind touches, kind words, kind tone.


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## jadegirl553 (Mar 28, 2004)

My parenting philosophy is tattooed on me!









I have the word "grace" tattooed on my wrist. To me grace means unconditional love, strength, support, always assuming the best and freedom to be. I have it as a tattoo because I want to remember to give grace to myself and to everyone around me... including my children.


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## BlueStateMama (Apr 12, 2004)

Is this the hill you want to die on???

(helps me "pick my battles" with my 6 and 7 year old)


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## lynsage (Jul 13, 2004)

These children are a gift from the Universe- be grateful.


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## XanaduMama (May 19, 2006)

Another vote for "The days are long but the years are short."

Also "SERENITY NOW!"


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## journeymom (Apr 2, 2002)

'Love Unconditionally'

Or, 'How you spend your days is how you spend your years'.

Both help my shape my parenting choices.


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## dauphinette (Nov 13, 2007)

"Do the best you can where you are, and be kind" got this one from Soulemama today but she quoted it from Scott Nearing, don't know who that is but I love the quote so I thought I'd share.

I like the addition of the words 'where you are' because it reminds me that where I am is likely to change and grow and I can always do the best I can with whatever life hands me.


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## mandalamama (Sep 1, 2004)

"breathe"


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## A&A (Apr 5, 2004)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Lydiah*
> 
> Pick your battles wisely.


Love this.


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## SkyTower (Sep 8, 2009)

I am not responsible for my child's happiness; I am only responsible for meeting her needs and providing the opportunity to be happy.

(she is going through a lot of tantrums lately and this helps remind me that she is just not going to be happy all the time and that's okay)


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## journeymom (Apr 2, 2002)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *SkyTower*
> 
> I am not responsible for my child's happiness; I am only responsible for meeting her needs and providing the opportunity to be happy.
> 
> (she is going through a lot of tantrums lately and this helps remind me that she is just not going to be happy all the time and that's okay)


This was a big one for me. *It is not my job to keep my child from ever feeling any mental pain.*


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## samstress (Feb 21, 2008)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *journeymom*
> 
> This was a big one for me. *It is not my job to keep my child from ever feeling any mental pain.*


this would be dh's. in fact, his would be, it is my duty as a parent to make sure my children experience discomfort and disappointment.


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## journeymom (Apr 2, 2002)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *samstress*
> 
> this would be dh's. in fact, his would be, it is my duty as a parent to make sure my children experience discomfort and disappointment.


Hmm. I'm sorry! I think my take is a little different from your dh's.


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## samstress (Feb 21, 2008)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *journeymom*
> 
> Hmm. I'm sorry! I think my take is a little different from your dh's.


actually, it's not...i was just exaggerating a bit.


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## journeymom (Apr 2, 2002)

OK, I must be misunderstanding you. So I'm just going to clarify what my thinking was when I posted the above. I was getting myself tied up in knots, feeling horribly like I'd failed my job as a mom whenever my daughter experienced some sort of mental anguish: painful break-up with close friend, painful breakup with first boyfriend, that kind of thing. That she was unhappy, even really unhappy, wasn't a FAIL on my part. I needed to calm the heck down so I could comfort her. So my above statement was something of a revelation to me.

That's all!


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## sebandg'smama (Oct 29, 2005)

"You can't rush a river"


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## mtiger (Sep 10, 2006)

Not a hill to die on.


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## contactmaya (Feb 21, 2006)

probably: treat others as you wish to be treated


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## PiperLime (Jun 13, 2011)

Be. Here. Now.

As a single mommy, this is the only thing that keeps me from *freaking out* sometimes


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## reezley (May 27, 2006)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *journeymom*
> 
> 'Love Unconditionally'
> 
> ...


Ooh, "How you spend your days is how you spend your years". Yes. A more direct and useful version of "Life is what happens while you're making other plans".


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## Subhuti (Feb 18, 2005)

When they were babies, my mantra was ..... Respond.

Now that they are 5 and 7, my mantra to myself is ..... Be still.

Does that resonate with anyone?


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## AngelKissedKids (Dec 8, 2009)

Connection before correction.


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## Subhuti (Feb 18, 2005)

Oh ... and:

When in doubt, hug.


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## Deepfeet (Nov 19, 2010)

'Don't do, just be.' (we're all happier when I put my expectations and agendas aside and give us all room to be ourselves)

or...

'Wait.' - because babies are so much smarter than we ( i ) think they are, and giving my DS time to solve his own problems (getting a good grip on an apple to gnaw on or rolling off a pillow on the floor) always ends with a goofy, victorious grin, and watching him master his surroundings is more exciting than me showing him how to.

which leads me to my final and favorite option:

"When you teach a child something, you take away forever his chance of discovering it for himself" - Jean Piaget.


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## contactmaya (Feb 21, 2006)

There's some really beautiful mottos here, thankyou.


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## Arete (Aug 1, 2010)

"Rainforest baby."

Inspired by The Continuum Concept, a lovely if not-quite-perfect book.


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## Mommel (Apr 16, 2010)

"This too shall pass"

And it IS tattooed on me forever - it's a reminder to me that every moment is fleeting and that I get no do-overs in life, whether it's parenting or something else.


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## aparent (May 9, 2006)

"The child of a tiger is a tiger." ~ Haitian proverb


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## mrs.t (May 10, 2010)

"There will never be another moment like this."

I adopted that quote from this article. It really helps me to be in the present moment when I am losing my patience, but also when something really sweet is happening between me and DS.


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## Carolyn R (Mar 31, 2008)

"Remind me of this, with every decision - generations will reap what I sow."


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## OldFashionedGirl (Mar 22, 2004)

Not as concise as the others, but my motto nevertheless:

My job as a parent is to do such a good job, that when my children are 18 they don't need me anymore. My goal as a parent is to do this in such a way that they still WANT me to be around, anyway.


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## Hoopin' Mama (Sep 9, 2004)

Every day is a gift.


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## A&A (Apr 5, 2004)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *OldFashionedGirl*
> 
> Not as concise as the others, but my motto nevertheless:
> 
> My job as a parent is to do such a good job, that when my children are 18 they don't need me anymore. My goal is a parent is to do this in such a way that they still WANT me to be around, anyway.


I love this!

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Hoopin' Mama*
> 
> Every day is a gift.


This is beautiful.

It reminds me of what my son ( age 8 at the time) wrote for me on Mother's Day: "Mothers always remember whom they were gifted with." (And yes, he used "whom" correctly all by himself!)


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## cambridgebaby (Nov 15, 2010)

Great responses!

I just wrote a blog post about my "mothering mantra" and then stumbled up on this thread!

Mine is: Calm. Caring. Curious.

-Kerry at City Kids Homeschooling


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## Subhuti (Feb 18, 2005)

Hi -- kerry -- loved your blog!


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## jodieanneanton (Apr 8, 2010)

My mantra is "All in her(or his) own time!"


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## Shanny2032 (Aug 10, 2009)

I actually found one I liked in journeymoms signature

*must be present to win *

*I also parent very much based on the man/fish quote*

*"Give a man a fish; you have fed him for today. Teach a man to fish; and you have fed him for a lifetime"-Author unknown *


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## Smokering (Sep 5, 2007)

Quote:


> *I also parent very much based on the man/fish quote*
> 
> *"Give a man a fish; you have fed him for today. Teach a man to fish; and you have fed him for a lifetime"-Author unknown *


Personally I prefer "Give a man a fire and warm him for a day; set a man on fire and warm him for the rest of his life". But to each her own...


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## KitKnitty (Apr 13, 2009)

My dad's parenting motto was: "Give them roots to grow and wings to fly." I'm not sure where he got that.

My motto is "Engage." It covers a lot of ground!


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## jpaigeadams (Mar 4, 2007)

"True Compassion"

I do want to get this tattooed on my wrist. I think compassion underlies just about everything else.


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## Blissy (Aug 7, 2006)

Children live up to or down to your expectations


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## lunarlady (Jan 4, 2010)

Patience.

When I get really fed up with the epic amounts of time it takes me to do simple things with two kids in tow, I find myself chanting under my breath, patience, patience, patience. When things get really, really awful, and steam is coming out my ears, I tell myself "patience is a virtue. Practice time!"


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## blessedwithboys (Dec 8, 2004)

Err on the side of kindness.

Kept me from ever trying CIO!


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## pokeyrin (Apr 3, 2008)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *jodieanneanton*
> 
> My mantra is "All in her(or his) own time!"


Reminds me of this great one I came across lately that seems so fitting in helping me work with my almost 3 year old - "parenting has never, and will never be about convenience"


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