# The Pearls back under fire...



## ~*Cherimoya*~ (Jun 16, 2002)

After the death of a boy whose mother sought their advice: http://www.newsobserver.com/102/story/418676.html


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## TinkerBelle (Jun 29, 2005)

Good gracious.

How stupid are people, anyway?

The Pearls also support women staying with child molesting husbands too. Sick sick sick.


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## MomInFlux (Oct 23, 2003)

I can't say anything that wouldn't violate the UA.

But I find this to be especially horrifying:

Quote:

Christian evangelicals who, like the Pearls, teach the importance of corporal punishment have loyal followers. The results are tangible, said Dot Ehlers, executive director of a Smithfield nonprofit who teaches parenting skills to mothers and fathers referred to them by the Johnston County Department of Social Services. She said about a quarter of the 60 parents she instructs each week say their faith defends and encourages corporal punishment.
So, the Johnston County Department of Social Services is referring parents to a nonprofit organization who says that the Pearl's methods have tangible results. I'm too appalled for words.


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## BetsyPage (Mar 5, 2004)

I am so upset over this.







That is the county my dh grew up in. How tragic.


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## Milkymommi (Aug 29, 2003)




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## flyingspaghettimama (Dec 18, 2001)

"Some people would rather spend an hour reasoning with a defiant 5-year-old instead of requiring the kid to behave and giving him a swat if he doesn't," said Hicks, who said she has used a peach-tree switch to spank her four children. "Some people are just queasy about swatting their kids."

Ah yes, those of us who choose to not switch our kids with peach tree branches and suffocate them to death are just big wimps, that's all. I am very sorry she lacks the requisite verbal skils to get her five year old to listen without hitting him.

I wish we could make them all go away to whatever rock they've crawled out from underneath - and maybe their children could find homes where they could be loved instead of switched or hit with various hardware pieces. Sick.


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## rachelmarie (Mar 21, 2005)

This makes me so sad for all the children of these parents who feel they are doing the "right" thing by assaulting (and murdering) them for misbehavior. It absolutely makes me sick.


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## afishwithabike (Jun 8, 2005)

Humm...People SHOULD feel queasy for ABUSING their children! To say striking is not abuse is insane. I posted about this a little while ago on another thread butI know a lady who carries one of those recommended switches in her back pocket in case an offense occurs anytime anywhere. UGH. She will NEVER be watching MY DC. I don't care if she's family to my BIL. I just can't see how taking this advice doesn't raise a few questions in the parents.


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## Fuamami (Mar 16, 2005)

Poor little boy! Ugh.

I have to say, no one's ever been killed by being reasoned with for an hour.


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## TortelliniMama (Mar 11, 2004)

Hey, finally something from a spokesman for the Pearls that I can wholeheartedly agree with!

Quote:

The Pearls declined to be interviewed. "They feel the material speaks for itself," Cohen said.
Yeah, it certainly does.


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## PumpkinSeeds (Dec 19, 2001)




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## irinam (Oct 27, 2004)

Incomrehensible...


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## Emmama (Jan 21, 2004)

This is heartbreaking. Unbelievable.








for the little boy


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## lechepatito (May 24, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MomInFlux*
So, the Johnston County Department of Social Services is referring parents to a nonprofit organization who says that the Pearl's methods have tangible results. I'm too appalled for words.

I'm definitely not defending the Pearls or anything associated with them - they make me want to vomit, or cry my eyes out, or both - but I just wanted to point out that I don't think the organization supports their methods. It's the parents who get referred who believe their faith defends the methods, not the organization itself. At least that's what I read (and what I *want* to believe, because as bad as they sometimes are, I can't believe that Social Services would really use an organization that backed the Pearls).

Tragic. And I couldn't even read the story because just thinking about what must be in there makes me queasy. Poor, poor babies.


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## rachelmarie (Mar 21, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *natensarah*
I have to say, no one's ever been killed by being reasoned with for an hour.

Very good point.


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## IncaMama (Jun 23, 2004)

omg...disgusting...this poor little boy...why did they adopt 6 kids if they were just gonna beat them to death??? this boy should have been placed with a family that would love him, not kill him. omg this is just horrendous. i have no more words.
















:


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## Kaitnbugsmom (Dec 4, 2003)

add me to those who can't comment without violating the TOS


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## Peepsqueak (Jul 5, 2005)

Maybe this will be a wake up call to people who are thinking they are doing the Christian thing by using these atrocious childrearing methods! As it says in the Bible, there are many false prophets and teachers. The Pearls are definately an example. Very frightening!


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## darsmama (Jul 23, 2004)

I dont understand how she was trying to discipline him. It says he was wrapped up in a blanket tight. What part of the Pearls' demented program is that?? I've never read the book so I don't know.


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## Kontessa (Nov 5, 2005)

How terribly sad.

I am sorry, not this sounds like true evil to me. And the damn ministers would not even talk about this! What the hell! I hope I do not hurt anyones feeling with my rage. If so, again I sorry.

I will risk having spoiled children, rather then dead ones in body or spirit.

Blessings,
Kontessa


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## ~*Cherimoya*~ (Jun 16, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kontessa*
I will risk having spoiled children, rather then dead ones in body or spirit.

Blessings,
Kontessa

Well said!


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## Steady101 (Jun 24, 2004)

OMG how sad.


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## cookclanmama (Jun 23, 2005)

OMG...how sickening! And how the hell do you wrap a four year old so tightly that he suffocates?! My G-d!


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## Llyra (Jan 16, 2005)




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## AngelBee (Sep 8, 2004)

: for this little guys siblings.









I am ANTI SPANKING.

But there is a difference between spanking and killing your child. These parents went WAY above even spanking! Leaving huge bruises on a fatty butt, suffercating a child.... uke







My heart is so broken!


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## PennyRoo (Dec 7, 2004)

Oh, God, that poor sweet boy. I can't imagine the horror he must have endured to be wrapped so tightly he suffocated. I'm in tears of outrage and sadness.

The article quotes Pearl as saying discipline turns to abuse when the "child is broken in spirit, cowed and subdued ...". WTF? And who says when that fine line is crossed? Wouldn't having "disciplinary tools" designed for hitting accessible in every room of the house have some sort of subduing effect on the spirit?

Why, why, why?


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## AngelBee (Sep 8, 2004)

This reminds me of that woman in White Bear, MN who killed her adopted son in I think the 80's.

Used to make him pray kneeling on a broom stick if he was bad. He was only like three years old.


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## afishwithabike (Jun 8, 2005)

Again I must state how heartbroken I am over this whole sick twisted situation. I am also going to stick my meck out there a dn mention that I am a Christian who does not believe that the Bible is referencing a literal rod used to abuse their children. It has always been explained to me as a shepherds staff. Used to point and direct children in an understanding of right and wrong. I gently guide and direct my children to choose things that are morally acceptable. I treat them with respect becuase they are people NOT some second class citizen who needs to be "subdued" as stated by the Pearls. I really get upset many times when things like this come up and people who claim to be Godly take an extreme stance on something that is completely and utterly disghusting. It give those of us who have a grasp on how to do things the right way a bad reputation because of the "rotten apple". I HAD to get that out sorry for the tangent.


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## AngelBee (Sep 8, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *afishwithabike*
Again I must state how heartbroken I am over this whole sick twisted situation. I am also going to stick my meck out there a dn mention that I am a Christian who does not believe that the Bible is referencing a literal rod used to abuse their children. It has always been explained to me as a shepherds staff. Used to point and direct children in an understanding of right and wrong. I gently guide and direct my children to choose things that are morally acceptable. I treat them with respect becuase they are people NOT some second class citizen who needs to be "subdued" as stated by the Pearls. I really get upset many times when things like this come up and people who claim to be Godly take an extreme stance on something that is completely and utterly disghusting. It give those of us who have a grasp on how to do things the right way a bad reputation because of the "rotten apple". I HAD to get that out sorry for the tangent.









I agree. All of the research/Bible study that I have done on discipline has lead me to believe the same about the rod being used to guide, NOT HIT.

It saddens me that so many are still mislead


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## HelloKitty (Apr 1, 2004)

This is so awful. I have no words, I'm just literally sick over this.


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## Quagmire (Sep 27, 2005)

Good god.


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## Baby Makes 4 (Feb 18, 2005)

My original post was deleted due to violation of the TOS. Oops.

This just reinforces my belief that the best parenting advice you will ever get is that which comes from your heart. No book can teach you how to love your babies.


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## KA29 (Jan 8, 2006)

Quote:

"Some people would rather spend an hour reasoning with a defiant 5-year-old instead of requiring the kid to behave and giving him a swat if he doesn't," said Hicks, who said she has used a peach-tree switch to spank her four children. "Some people are just queasy about swatting their kids."
Actually this is true for me. I would rather spend an hour reasoning (not that I can remember a time when that was necessary) and I am queasy about swatting my kids. With anything much less a peach tree switch.







:

Too bad some other people think beating their kids is an appropriate parenting technique.


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## bellona (Feb 17, 2006)

Oh, god...I think I'm going to uke

It breaks my heart to think that this poor child only lived 4 short years of his life... it makes me sickened to the core to think what kind of hell those years must have been.

COME ON!!! HE WAS 4 YEARS OLD!!! Even if it hadn't killed him, how could they really think it was worth it?

It







me off to think of all the people who have told me that I'm going to regret not physically punishing my kids (especially that OH SO SMUG pastor who assured me that if I spank them 'right' there should be no need to do it after the age of three because they'll just listen







). If things get a little overboard at my house as far as discipline is concerned... at least I know that you can't reason someone to death







:

Did anyone catch that reference to the homeschooling magazine towards the bottom of the article? Is that the Old School House? A bunch of people think I'm crazy cause I won't even LOOK at it or TALK about it (except to inform others of course) because of the Pearls. Now I'm really anti them









ARGH! I don't know whether to







, uke or







'bout this









Somebody tell me why the Pearls are not in jail or something for child (and assisted child) abuse!! I read their book online and I cannot believe that someone would even do these things...let alone let the whole world know about it


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## bellona (Feb 17, 2006)

I posted too soon. I'm not ready to get off my







yet.

That mother with the peach tree switches should go to jail too









I remember being about 5 and I don't know what I did, but I was sent outside to find a switch. All I really remember was standing out there stalling, wondering if I could actually get away with running away or if I should just go ahead and kill myself (really.).

I did neither because I had a little baby brother to protect









With so much information available to parents these days HOW CAN THEY STILL THINK THAT THIS IS A GOOD WAY????????

Those poor beaten-with-a-peach-tree kids in Texas.









I can't imagine doing this stuff to an adult that I hate. How can people do it to their kids that they love?


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## afishwithabike (Jun 8, 2005)

Quote:

I can't imagine doing this stuff to an adult that I hate. How can people do it to their kids that they love?
That's how I feel and I have made that clear a few times. If you had a co-worker or acquaintance that did/said something you didn't like would you BEAT them with a peach tree switch? The logic is sickening.


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## jenmk (Apr 28, 2005)

It's amazing that someone who does that would be allowed to adopt 6 children . . . let alone even 1.

It's just so shocking and sad. How can people do this to innocent, defenseless children? I just don't understand it.


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