# Can your husband put your baby to sleep?



## Galatea (Jun 28, 2004)

I am so tired of spending an hour every night getting ds to sleep while dh gets to play by himself. Tonight I freaked out when ds woke up just as dinner was ready. I asked dh to please help me by learning how to put ds to sleep. Dh says he is not good at this b/c ds just wants to play with him. He said he will try and learn, though. How does sleep happen in your house? How does dh put the baby to sleep without nursing him/her down?


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## UrbanPlanter (Nov 14, 2003)

wish I could help you here. DH wasn't able to get ds to sleep until he was almost two, and even then he had a very difficult time.

Instead, I worked on putting ds to sleep and dh made dinner. I had/have a very attached, high spirited ds who I have always (and still do) nurse to sleep.

Sorry I'm not more helpful


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## the_lissa (Oct 30, 2004)

My husband rocks our baby to sleep or lays her down and pats her to sleep when he puts her down.


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## ledzepplon (Jun 28, 2004)

My darling dh puts dd to bed almost every night. They have a special routine together--he rocks her and they listen to some lullabies. When she wakes up at night, he changes her and brings her to me to nurse. Then we all cuddle and fall asleep.


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## AllyRae (Dec 10, 2003)

Yep, he does every night. I nurse him and dh puts him to bed...it's about the only time dh and Bran get to spend time together since dh gets home around 6:30 PM every night.


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## mommaluv321 (Aug 14, 2004)

well, I voted no, cause to date, dh has only gotten Asha to sleep 2x and both were unsuccesful-lay-downs


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## Jiggs (Aug 6, 2004)

You mean it's possible for DAD's to put babe to sleep??? :LOL
My DD is a nipple in the mouth kinda sleeper, also DH falls asleep before she does.








Goodluck!!


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## Parker'smommy (Sep 12, 2002)

If I'm unavailable ( read- ds doesn't think I'm around)dh can get him to sleep no problem. This is something we are currently working on though. I weaned ds from nursing to sleep because I am pregnant and the thought of nursing 2 kids to sleep at night made my head swim so I am currently laying down with him ( and going to sleep SO WELL...no problems with the not nursing to sleep, but he is also almost 3) Dh is going to start laying down with him in about 2 weeks.

I have never really regretted nursing my babe to sleep for 2 1/2 years but I think I will have dh parent this babe to sleep more than I let him do ds. I think its a good thing to have your babe be able to fall asleep in various ways so if the preferred way of going to sleep is not available, there is another option. kwim?


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## Hey Mama! (Dec 27, 2003)

Actually, Bethie goes down better for dh then she does for me. Ever since she weaned it's been a struggle most nights for me to get her to sleep. Matt can just lay down next to her in bed and she goes out like a light. He works a night job so he's not always here to help at bedtime.


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## MarineWife (May 1, 2004)

My dh used to put baby to sleep before he left. He would bounce ds on an exercise ball and he would go out almost immediately. He was able to get him to sleep when I couldn't. All babies are different, though, so what works for us may not work for you. I'm sorry you having such a hard time. Give your dh as much encouragement as possible and try not to interfere. That's one thing that was very hard for me. Even though my baby might have been crying with me, I would freak if he cried with dh even the slightest bit and feel like I was neglecting him.


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## cchrissyy (Apr 22, 2003)

since about 12 months old, Dh can walk/rock Ds to sleep, but not a "good" sleep. no matter how long they did it, DS popped awake when being layed down and so I'd have to nurse him anyway.


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## InochiZo (Aug 17, 2004)

I put yes we share it evenly. However, I almost always put him to bed at night while DH plays. I guess I don't mind too much because DH does watch him all day when I work.


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## rainbowmoon (Oct 17, 2003)

DH is great at putting ds to sleep but I love to as well so we usually fight over it.lol. he used to always fall asleep in his swing and would not go to sleep until we put him in there for 10-15 min. now he has outgrown it (like 3 months ago) and we usually rock him in our arms (who said that was a downside for using a swing?ha!)


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## Tanibani (Nov 8, 2002)

Nope.

When my son was a baby - he was "high needs" and BF to sleep and I had to sloooowly take him off the nipple and sneak away. DH felt it was "too hard" and I agreed. As a baby, if I had to go on an errand and had a babysitter, I would nurse him when he was sleep and she would hold/rock him to sleep. He didn't like it, but at least he was held. So I KNEW it was possible for someone else to do it... but it was never DH.

Around 15 months, we got a nighttime babysitter







and Bless Her, she was able to rock him to sleep too, without a problem. But if DH tried it, forget it. He felt tense and is very tall/skinny (not mushy/comfy) and perhaps that had something to do with it.

It really sucked







: I couldn't stay out very late and had to rush home (if I went to a Mother's & More meeting once a month) to a screaming baby/toddler and upset husband.







:

Not until he was weaned (3.5) did my DH start putting him to sleep. Even during weaning from BFing at night... it was me who was there with him.

It was only until I was pg... and telling DH way in advance, "look buddy, I will NOT







be able to put Giancarlo to sleep... you need to start..." and he did and then Giancarlo really looked forward to it and so did DH.

*Compare and Contrast to another family*







I have an AP girlfriend with the same age child. She had a friend in my position and her friend could never go out at night. At 6 months, she and her DH started taking turns - every night. It was hard the first 3 nights, but then they got into their own groove/routine and it really helped her out.







My DH would never go for that.









*Today I have an almost 5 month old*
I am not expecting DH to put her to sleep. DH puts DS to sleep now







and that's good enough for me.

Though she is much more easier! I can lay her down if she is conked out (I had to co-nap with my first born for the first 7 months!) and she will







pull herself off my boob if she's had enough!!!!

My first - nipple in mouth kind of sleeper. :LOL
2nd - no, but I'm OK with it. I'm just happy I don't have to put TWO to sleep! I really feel for mamas







that do.


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## nikirj (Oct 1, 2002)

My DH started watching the kids while I went to school back when they were small (about 6 months for DD, 9 for DS) and has been able to get them to sleep ever since. He needed to rock, sing, bounce, and cajole DD, but with DS, it was as simple as laying down in the bed and talking in a soft voice about the shadows and the trees...and DS would fall asleep for him. Amazing. Imagine my envy.

Anyway, now he rarely puts the kids to bed but this is mostly because I like to go to sleep when they do, so we usually all bathe and pile into bed, and go to sleep together.

But if I want to be up or need to be out or whatever, DH is totally able to get the kids settled and sleeping just as well as I can.


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## anothermama (Nov 11, 2003)

I voted "evenly" but it's really probably 70/30 in his favor..hes VERY good at it!


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## sntm (Jan 1, 2004)

He used to be able to, but DS now greatly prefers to nurse to sleep, and DH has given up trying. When he does, it's the "watch Baby Galileo until exhaustion takes over" method.


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## Angierae (Aug 17, 2004)

Not my 3yo or my 5 mo. Not once. Not ever. They are both nurse-to-sleep-onlys, and thats ok. Its hard with two, and it frustrates him that he can't share the job a little more. But they are happy, healthy, and we all get enough sleep in the end, so we keep marching along.


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## rumi (Mar 29, 2004)

dd is 16 months old and nurses to sleep both naps and nights. some aps she can rock to sleep and dh has done it but he is rarely around at naptime so it is usually me anyway.

i don't mind that much except i wonder if i am "supposed" to teach her multiple ways to sleep for her own well being. the other thing i want to know .... when she weans (by herself) then will she be able to sleep with dh or have i set a pattern/ expectation that will remain beyond nursing age?


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## nym (Sep 6, 2003)

I made sure that at 7 weeks DH took over the night time routine. I nurse DS and then DH puts him in his night time dipe, they brush their teeth, and have a song, then DH wraps DS up (he still needs/loves to be swaddled) and either watches TV while DS goes to sleep, or lies down with him. It has become more of a lie down thing lately. DS is usually out for a couple hours until I go to bed and nurse him.

I am very very happy with this, since it means I get some time to myself, and DH takes some responsibility. Now that I am PG again, I am glad that I don't have to do DS's nighttime routine


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## Al Dente (Jan 8, 2004)

Actually dh has just started (within the last 2 wks) trying to put ds down for naptime. Dh isn't a good rocker either, so he lays beside him and sings to him while rubbing his back. Ds does cry though and that bothers me. But it is definitely an "I'm tired and you are not giving me the booby!" cry and I think with a few more tries he will recognize that daddy can put him to sleep too.

But nighttime...not touching that with a 10 ft pole right now. If he doesn't get him back to sleep asap, ds will be awake and whiney for hours. The boob is much easier!


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