# My recent loss LONG STORY (m/c, blood transfussion, D&C)



## lilgsmommy (Jun 21, 2004)

This may not make make much sense....but then again the whole thing still doesnt make sense to me yet









We werent TTC but yet we werent avoiding either. We just let things happen.

The night before my birthday September 18th, we went out for my bday dinner, and DH was driving so I ordered a drink. 2 sips into it, I told him it was making me sick and we both knew the only reason I get sick when I have a drink. We didnt think of the possibility because I had a D&C July 29th due to a severly thickened uterine lining, and only DTD 2 times since then.

Sure enough a pregnancy test after dinner showed a faint line. And the one the next morning was even darker.

We were given a due date of June 1st and had to have several ultrasounds before we finally saw a flicker of a heartbeat and we were able to relax a little.

Due to my history we knew I would need a cerclage again, sceduled to be put in around 12 weeks.

At 4 1/2 weeks pregnant I started spotting. The spotting continued, and eventually I had bleeding, cramping and then it would stop, and we would get an ultrasound and the little one would still be there!

This went on til the weekend before Thanksgiving when we were sure the baby was gone. I was cramping and bleeding and passing tissue. At the ER I begged for pain meds and the Dr gave them to me, because he too was sure
that with all the tissue I was passing, the baby was gone. 3 hours later an ultrasound tech took me to get an ultrasound. I asked her to please let me see before she finished if my baby was still in there, whether it was alive or not, I wanted to connect with my baby atleast one more time.

She turned the monitor towards me and I began crying because the little one was still there, moving around and had a strong heartbeat. The Dr was amazed too.......no one knew why I was passing tissue, yet still had a healthy baby inside me.

My surgery for the cerclage was scheduled for the 27th. I just kept telling myself and the little one to hold on another week. We all figured I would make it til then.

We went to a hockey game the night of the 25th. I spent most of the night on my butt, and was feeling pretty good with minimal bleeding.

I needed to go to the bathroom, and so did my nephew (4yrs old) so I took him with me. We had to walk to the other side of the stadium cause the bathrooms near us were packed. We came out of the family restroom and were heading towards our seats on the other side. We kept moving out of the way of everyone rushing by because we were walking kinda slow.

We moved out of the way of a group of teenagers, which put us near a stairwell. As I went to walk back out a huge guy, reaking of alchohol and who had a beer in his hand. slammed into me shoving my lower abdomen into the hand rail. No excuse me, no sorry, no nothing he just kept going.

I held my nephews hand and used my other hand to massage my stomach since it had started cramping almost immediatly. We got back to our seats, I told DF and everone what happaned and that I didnt think I was gunna be able to last much longer without going to the ER. Game was over 30 minutes later, we made it home, and within 30 minutes of being home the bleeding and cramping were so bad I went to the ER. I was given tylenol, and an ultrasound and was told everythign looked ok...baby was moving and had a strong heartbeat, and they said that the trauma to my stomach irritated my uterus and to go home and rest til surgery.

I came home around 3am. I started contracting pretty strong and regular not long after that. DF said it was about every 3 minutes. I was in so much pain and so out of it, I dont remember much til around 7 am when I felt a strong urge to push and felt gushes of blood, and I got up and went to the bathroom. I passed alot of clots and tissue but nothing else. I went and laid back down, and during one of the contractions I felt a thump and a gush.

I told myself it was nothing, even though inside I knew.

I went to the toilet and passed the baby into the water. I scooped it out with my bare hands and looked at it and just lost it. I yelled for DF to bring me a container to put it in. I was still contracting and bleeding badly so I had him take me to the ER.

Triage nurse was being a snot! I asked for more pads and ran for the restroom. I spent most of the next hour and a half in the restroom. I was bleeding pretty badly. I asked for more pads and the security gaurd got me some. I had put on pads 8 and 9 and went to triage and told her I needed more pads. I told her I was bleeding bad and was feeling dizzy and sick to my stomach. She made me pull my pants down show her my pads and because I had just changed them, they werent soaked yet. She denied me more pads, refused to recheck vitals and told me I was fine. She said since I already passed the baby I should be ok, that the bleeding slows down after that.

I used the security gaurds phone and told DF to get down there, grab the kids, and come get me....I couldnt do it alone anymore. He got down there within 10 minutes. At that point I had gotton a chux pad and had that between my underwear and pants because I was leaking through everything.

He tolf the triage nurse that I had soaked 9 pads in an hour and a half time period and that she needed to please check em again...she refused and told him to sit down. She wouldnt give him more pads for me and even griped when he asked for a bucket so I could puke!

I told him I was feeling faint and needed to lay down.....I was dizzy and starting to see blurry. I told him to get me home and call an ambulance and get me to another hospital. I told the security gaurd to go get my baby from the triage nurse because I wanted to take my baby with me. She looked at me like I was crazy. I got pissed and told her to go get my baby from the *insert nasty name here* in the triage area and bring it to me because I was leaving to call an ambulance and I was taking my baby with me. Needless to say, she went and got it and brought it to me.

We live 4 blocks away. From the minute we left the hospital til I got picked up, was 8 1/2 minutes.

They were unable to get a blood pressure on me and my pulse was so faint the could barely get it.

I was rushed onto a gurny and put into the shock position with my feet above my head...still nothing. I asked if I could go to sleep...all I wanted to do was sleep.

I had firemen and paramedics rushing around me. I was hurried into an ambulance and had an iv shoved into my wrist. BP machine still couldnt get a blood pressure, and they couldnt either with the cuff. The hooked me up to an EKG machine and my pulse was thready and faint.

She told her partner lets go, and they flipped lights and sirens on and we were gone. I dont remember much of the ride, cept being told to stay awake, and asked to state my name and age over and over again. They put me on oxygen too.

At the hospital there were people all around me, asking questions, poking me, giving me a shot of this and a shot of that and hooking me up to monitors. I was at the hospital 30 minutes before the machine could pick up my blood pressure...it was 60/30.....not good! I was given meds through both IV's and finally started stabilizing.

I was still passing a ton of clots and blood. Once they confirmed tha baby was in the container I brought with me, they gave me some other meds to help my uterus contract more, and hooked me up with some pain killers.

I wasnt sure of the time, nor what was going on half the time. A nurse told me DF called and he was worried about me. She was awesome! She gave me a hug and told me DF said I probably needed one...lol. After my ultrasound the gave me more pain meds and shots, and she came over to tell me DF called again, and he was still unable to find someone to watch the kids so I didnt have to be alone. She gave me her cell phone, said she had free nights and weekends, and told me to call him and talk as long as I needed to.

The on call OB for my Dr came to see me. Because I had lost so much blood he said I would need a transfusion. I also needed a D&C to help clear the rest of the stuff out and control the bleeding. At that point I knew I had been bleeding bad, but not that bad. Heck every time I moved, or sat up I was gushing so much blood it felt like I had peed myself. I knew they keep changing the chux and what not, but never really looked to see how much there was. When I got to move to the exam table for the OB to check me, I found out just how much. It scared me! I started crying asking if that much blood was okay...they said no but that everything will be alright.

OB checked me and I was put back on a gurney.

I was given some meds through my IV, signed consent for surgery and the transfusion. I was told that the OR team was preping and would be down to get me in a few minutes.....I didnt think it was that urgent but I guess it really was. Mind you I was so out of it most of the time.

OR team came down and was getting my info and such and a new baby on the gurney next to me started crying....cute little thing....4 days old....I told them to get me out of there NOW, and started crying.

DF was still at home with the kids, so I was alone.

In the prep room I was given the pep talk about anasthesia, and signed the papers. I was taken into the OR and moved onto the table. I was given more warm blankets, and put back on the oxygen.

I started to taste the meds, was told to take a few deep breaths...and I was gone...lol

I woke up in recovery and was told DF was in the waiting room, but I needed to get hooked up to my blood transfusion, before he could come back.

I stayed the night and was released the next morning after getting 2 units of blood.

I saw my OB yesterday and got the PATH report.







:

Our little one was a boy. We were all sure it was a girl, cept my older DS who from the start said it was Xander. So thats we have named him. Everything was normal, except that there was marked edema and hemorging of the baby's head and back. They said that was the only unusual thing, and that it was likely a cause from the trauma to my abdomen (normally the baby is well cushioned but due to the constant bleeding there wasnt as much cushion around him) and the birth itself, although they said its not normally seen on a miscarried fetus....its unusual.

It wasnt my first loss and I know it wont be my last, but it was my most traumatic one so far.

When I got home DS asked me to see the hole in my tummy....he remembered the last time I had a baby was the twins, and I had a csection. I was hard to explain to him what happaned. He kept asking when the baby was coming home.

Baby Xander was due June 2007, but was born at 13 weeks on November 26th 2006.


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## doulatara (Jun 20, 2006)

Love to you and your family. I'm sorry you had to go through this terrible loss. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.


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## Mamato2 (Oct 28, 2004)

Thinking of you here.







I wondered how you had been since leaving the June board (I am gone too). I am sorry you had to experience something so traumatic and I hope your recovery goes well. Take care of yourself.


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## Starleigh (Jul 27, 2003)

I'm so sorry for your loss.


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## mamatowill (Aug 23, 2004)

I am very sorry for your loss.


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## *Lindsey* (Mar 20, 2005)

I'm so sorry. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.


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## CarolynnMarilynn (Jun 3, 2004)

I am so sorry for your loss and for the horrible way you were treated.


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## STBSM (Oct 22, 2006)

Many hugs to you MAMA!


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## mommysusie (Oct 19, 2006)

My God that was so horrible what you went through! Have you considered consulting an attorney about what happened at the first hospital?


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## lilgsmommy (Jun 21, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mommysusie* 
My God that was so horrible what you went through! Have you considered consulting an attorney about what happened at the first hospital?


Yes we have! we are in the process of getting reports from the ambulance and the second ER....mainly to prove how bad off I was. We will then have a meeting with the admin at the first hospital to file a complaint, and then we will meet with an attorney.


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## coralsmom (Apr 1, 2005)

omg, i am so sorry for what you have been through.
i am so sorry you lost your son.

it is so aweful just how uncaring and flippant and inhumane people can really be. i hope that whatever/however at that hospital is changed, reprimanded or fired for the inappropriate level of care you were given.

i hope you are feeling physically better. i know emotionally it will take time to grieve your loss, but it is good you found this forum to share how you are feeling.


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## mommysusie (Oct 19, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lilgsmommy* 
Yes we have! we are in the process of getting reports from the ambulance and the second ER....mainly to prove how bad off I was. We will then have a meeting with the admin at the first hospital to file a complaint, and then we will meet with an attorney.

Good for you! I had to do something similiar a few years ago when I had a loss and I'm glad I did. I later found out that OB had several lawsuits against him.


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## mrsfatty (Dec 21, 2004)

I am so sorry for your loss.

That first ER should be sued.


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## ~MoonGypsy~ (Aug 21, 2006)

.

Love to you and your family.


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## mamallama (Nov 22, 2001)

I am so sorry


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## canadianchick (May 18, 2005)

So sorry for your loss.


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## pianojazzgirl (Apr 6, 2006)

Oh I am so so sorry for your loss and all that you went through at that hospital.


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