# How did you tear with your first?



## Celticqueen (Feb 17, 2007)

There are so many varieties in the way we push out our babies! Some tear, some don't.

With my first, I tore a very tiny tear- only one stitch! joy: But honestly, for whatever reason, I think this next time I will tear. Don't know why- I just do.

What about you?

So I'm curious because we're all so different and I'd love to see the variety in responses!

-Caitrin


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## Celticqueen (Feb 17, 2007)

Also remember- it's not "right" or "wrong" either way. Our bodies are just different!

-Caitrin


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## Mommy2Austin (Oct 10, 2006)

I had about 8 stitches with DS1. I tore because they had me pushing when he hadn't fully turned so he was coming out sideways.

DS2 was born at home in is own time (I didn't force push I just let my body work) and I thought I was gonna tear too (swore I could feel it tearing.) I didn't even have a skidmark







SO you just never know!


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## Cutie Patootie (Feb 29, 2004)

I tore a little with ds. I can't remember how many stitches. He was 7.12#, a complicated pregnancy, hospital birth, cruddy interventions and a vaccuum...which explains it. I did not tear at all with my second baby, dd was 9.10#, home water birth.







I am hoping for the same thing with this babe. dc#1 was 56 hours of laboring etc. and dc#2 was super fast 4 hours from start to finish, 30 minutes of pushing and that was it. I kind of opt for the fast one this time around.


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## tammyswanson (Feb 19, 2007)

I tore really badly..but it was my own fault. I was starting to get frantic to get him out..(I was in the pushing stage at this time). I had my hand in there when I was pushing, which caused me to get a labial tear pretty bad. I didn't notice it until when I was trying to get the plancenta out. Ouchie!

Otherwise I wouldn't have torn. I was in the tub for a few hours, and I had also made sure to 'hold back' during the final stage when he was crowning.


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## whalemilk (Jul 11, 2008)

Is 2nd degree considered "badly"? IMHO it was bad, it took a long time to heal and doesn't really feel completely normal to me to this day. But at least it went down, not up!

FTR I had a homebirth.


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## luckymamato2 (Jun 3, 2006)

I chose not bad, but according to the papers, I had 3 tears, a 3rd degree and 2 1st degrees. 6 stitches. It wasn't that bad.









I pushed with the urge/contractions but it was somewhat coached - at a birth center.


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## wbg (Mar 28, 2008)

I tore with my first...and my second...and my third...and my fourth!!

With my first and third I tore as I pushed out the shoulders.

Second came out so fast I could not tell you when or how!

Fourth was my worst tear. Probably from baby's hand being next to head as I pushed. She was my only water birth too and I really believed this would be the birth where I did NOT tear!

That being said, each tear healed fine. I did have stitches each time. Bt it all seems pretty much back to normal. With my last birth, we were at home and my MW asked if I wanted to see. She showed me the tear in the mirror and in retrospect I wish I had said no! My birth seemed so peaceful, and the tear seemed so brutal in comparison that it kind of freaked me out! DH says it is defs the worst of my tears cos' obviously he had a better view of them than I have in the past!

Not sure if there are more kids in our future, but if there are...I have made my peace that there will be tearing no matter where r how I birth!


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## njbeachgirl (Oct 8, 2006)

I voted small tear.

1st birth=pit, epi, coached pushing on back, and I tore

2nd birth-at home, in water, pushed as my body told me to, still tore

both were about the same. 2nd was maybe a bit smaller.


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## SABE (May 22, 2005)

I had a major 3rd degree tear with my first child thanks to a big asynclitic head and a vacuum delivery. After 69 hours of labor, I was exhausted and just wanted to be done. Recovery was not fun.

I tore along my scar line with subsequent deliveries and needed stitches, but those tears were fairly minor compared to birth #1.


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## ilovebabies (Jun 7, 2008)

#1 - 4th degree episiotomy








#2 - 2nd degree episiotomy
#3 - slight tear needing a stitch or two
#4 - same as above


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## Peony (Nov 27, 2003)

I didn't tear with either one of my DC.


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## ledzepplon (Jun 28, 2004)

I had some minor tearing with my dd--I needed like one to two stitches in a couple places. But nothing major. No tears with ds.


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## TenderHearted29 (Jul 31, 2008)

For 1st DS I had an epis, epi, forced pushing and forceps. I tore down to a 4th degree. He was just shy of 9lbs. Had major problems with incontinence until my hyst 4yrs later. My 2nd DS was induced, epidural, no episiotomy and absolutely no pushing and no tearing, not even a skid mark. He was a peanut at 6lb11oz.


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## dex_millie (Oct 19, 2006)

3rd degree natural tear. I need to find out my right position. I did everything right in my eyes. I stood and swat which is what I felt like doing in the bathroom. I wasn't coached I just let my body take over, my labor was even short only 2 hours! So I wasn't tired, stress nothing, no screaming, no mourning noise because it wasn't that bad. I didn't even get the burning feeling with the head, I was so shock I tore so much. With the head the midwife did say to breath it out and I did, but with the rest of the body I just did what my body told me too, I tore with the shoulders, I guess I should had tried to breath that out too, that is the only thing I could think of, but I didn't forcefull push, I just followed the contraction lead.


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## nighten (Oct 18, 2005)

Minor tear, upward -- the only area I'd not focused on with perineal balm ahead of time. Now I know better.


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## Sioko (Feb 3, 2007)

DD1 = no tear, "skid mark" only (reeeaaallllyy sore)
DD2 = small tear, no stitches needed (never noticed







)

Both born in hospital with pitocen augmentation, went with "the urge" on both, no meds DD2, 2 doses staydol DD1 (bad bad stuff btw)


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## MCatLvrMom2A&X (Nov 18, 2004)

With dd I had a very tiny urethral tear with a few stitches hurt horribly for weeks when I peed after. It was caused by the dr using the vaccum on dd and he also cut me from vagina to anus







against my wishes.

With ds all I had was skid marks.


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## Mommoo (Jun 26, 2008)

I had 3rd degree tearing. My son's head was huge (still is). The midwife wouldn't tell me how many stitches. I tore to the muscle, and to, but not through, the anus. Ouch! It healed well though, and relatively quickly! I was sure to have a squirt bottle of warm water whenever I went to the toilet.


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## unlegal (Feb 18, 2005)

1st - Episiotomy. 3rd degree tear.
2nd - 2nd degree, if I had to guess. Lots of minor tearing everywhere. Went unassisted. Healed with natural remedies.


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## roadfamily6now (Sep 14, 2006)

Had a c-section with my first
Small tear with my 2nd
3rd degree tear with my 3rd
Small tear with my 4th
No tear with my 5th
No tear with my 6th.

Ironically, the ONLY time I tore was when I was in the hospital! And my last 2 babies were born weighing over 10pounds each!


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## Maximeee (May 1, 2008)

2 first degree tears: 1 in my perineum and 1 in my perineal floor (internal). No stitches.


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## cesca (Feb 19, 2008)

I chose "small tear" on the poll. I had a very small tear with DS, no stitches needed.

He was born at home and was pretty big - 10lb 6oz, with a big 39cm head.

(with my second I had no tears at all, despite me fearing it... DD was even bigger too!)


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## boobyfeeder (May 20, 2006)

I had a 2nd degree tear with DD1, due to coached pushing (IMO). I don't remember how many stitches it required. I had only a skidmark with DD2, no stitches.


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## Quaniliaz (Oct 11, 2002)

I need an "other".







I had a small arterial tear with my first, due to her nuchial hand.







It required stitches because I was loosing too much blood. My perineum was fine.


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## dogmom327 (Apr 19, 2007)

Another nuchial hand here. I think I ended up with a second degree (at one point it looked like a third degree) and several first degree tears. Not fun and it seemed unfair somehow because DS was only 6#.


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## mwherbs (Oct 24, 2004)

extension of an epis other wise it would not have been as bad


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## Collinsky (Jul 7, 2004)

I've never torn. All UCs, but with my first I was on my back for pushing. (Long story.)


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## HoneyTree (Apr 5, 2005)

I had a pretty nasty third-degree tear that took a very, very long time to heal. Oddly, my midwife told me afterwards that she suspected I'd tear, and I've always wondered what factors contributed to that (though in learning more, I'm pretty sure the coached pushing, on-my-back labor with a hostile-to-homebirth-transfers OB had a little something to do with it







).

I don't think I'll tear this time. I am much more prepared mentally, emotionally, and physically, and I think I know the moment when things got a little scary, so hopefully, if faced with that again, I'll focus on my breathing!!


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## artemis80 (Sep 8, 2006)

3rd-degree tear from forceps.


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## soso-lynn (Dec 11, 2007)

No tear even though she came out so fast. I was lying on my side and my body was pushing on its own. If anything, I was trying to slow it down. I was not sore at all afterwards either.


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## ShadowMoon (Oct 18, 2006)

I never tore (for whatever reason).


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## Staciemao (Feb 15, 2008)

I got 45 stitches after my first, due to what my hubby describes as a "vicious" episiotomy, some nasty tears (I don't know the degree) and two hours of forced pushing. I never felt the urge. The tearing and the episiotomy are actually what caused me to search for a midwife my second time around. So I guess I'm kind of glad I tore...having a wonderful birth experience has changed my life in many many beautiful ways. If it took an epis to do it, I'm still grateful.

My second time I tore right along my episiotomy scar. My daughter's head came out funny...she had a 3X nuchal cord and her neck was almost leaning back. I also got a little anxious and pushed _reallyreallyreallyhard_ even when I didn't really feel like it, which I am sure contributed to my tearing. I opted out of stitches. My vagina is not like it used to be, but after two kids, whose is?









We are currently "not preventing" our third. I am convinced that when I get pregnant and birth our next one, I won't tear at all.


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## kerikadi (Nov 22, 2001)

I wish - I tore because of an episiotomy was an option.
I tore badly BECAUSE of one.


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## Funny Face (Dec 7, 2006)

I had a tiny tear with an epidural, vaginal delivery of a posterior baby! Whew!


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## texanatheart (Sep 10, 2007)

I had a small tear (toward the top) with ds. Thank goodness my mom was there at the hospital...she told the doctor something to the effect of, "If you touch that scalpel/those scissors, I'll cut your balls off!"







Go, Mom!!! He asked if she was a midwife and she said, "No, I'm a picture framer!" Okay, I'm rambling now...

I was glad at first that I didn't have it stitched (doc didn't offer, either), and that made me feel like it wasn't much of a tear, but now I'm kind of wishing he had stitched it.

Here's to no tears with my March baby!


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## GooeyRN (Apr 24, 2006)

Small tear with my first, had a few stitches. Wasn't bad. No tearing with my second.


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## Robinna (Aug 11, 2003)

I voted "I didn't tear" because there wasn't a "skid mark" option. I did get a little skid mark - but he had a nuchal hand so I thank my hypnobirthing that I was a really relaxed mama because it could have been so much worse. Skid marks aren't insignificant in terms of discomfort though... it might be worth adding a poll option.


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## Robinna (Aug 11, 2003)

texanatheart said:


> I had a small tear (toward the top) with ds. Thank goodness my mom was there at the hospital...she told the doctor something to the effect of, "If you touch that scalpel/those scissors, I'll cut your balls off!"
> 
> 
> 
> ...


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## mama*ashleigh (Jul 5, 2008)

I had a small skid mark with my first son, and he crowned nice and slow, and the midwife used hot compresses to help relax the perineum.

I had no tearing at all with my second son, and he literally flew out!!!


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## ChetMC (Aug 27, 2005)

I guess that I tore badly. Everybody who said that they had small tears didn't need stitches. I needed stitches every time. However, I was never sore.


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## Belle (Feb 6, 2005)

I tore for my first. On paper it was supposedly a 1st degree tear, but I personally think it was a 2nd degree. I have a pretty evident scar from it. There were several stitches. I voted that it wasn't that bad. They had me purple pushing, on my back, she had a nuchal hand, and her head was in the 120th percentile. I'm amazed I didn't tear more than that.


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## hapersmion (Jan 5, 2007)

I put "small tear" for my second degree, which got about 8 stitches. It was never a problem. (Breech baby with a giant head.)


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## soso-lynn (Dec 11, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Belle* 
I tore for my first. On paper it was supposedly a 1st degree tear, but I personally think it was a 2nd degree. I have a pretty evident scar from it. There were several stitches. I voted that it wasn't that bad. They had me purple pushing, on my back, she had a nuchal hand, and her head was in the 120th percentile. I'm amazed I didn't tear more than that.

A little off-topic, but by definition, percentiles only go up to 100. You can, however say that she was 20% larger than the 99th percentile.


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## OakBerry (May 24, 2005)

I tore pretty badly.
I don't know what # it qualified as, but the midwife did an episiotomy and then I tore the rest of the way to the rectum. Things still ain't right down there!
I had a partial abruption so they "let" me deliver vaginally, but I could not walk around or go in the water tub. So I opted for the epidural, since I was trapped in bed anyway. That led to me not feeling my pushing muscles, plus they had me pushing waaaay too early, even though I was 10cm.
I started pushing around midnight and ds was born right as the sun came up.

He was 8 pounds one ounce. I know if I had started pushing when *I* was ready, it would have been so much easier.







:


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## LadyAlathia (Sep 5, 2008)

2nd degree tear. I don't know how many stitches, but she was working on me for a while. I got special treatment, though... so she may have done me extra well.









I had a 10 1/2 lb-er, with a 13 inch head, 16 inch chest and shoulder dystocia. 37 hours of cervadil and pitocin labor and a vacuum. OB said (and Hubby confirmed) that I wouldn't have torn at ALL if she didn't have to shove her hands up there to get his arm free. Grr. 3 1/2 weeks later and I'm STILL kinda sore.


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## Queen of my Castle (Nov 11, 2005)

no tearing for either dc.


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## coobabysmom (Nov 16, 2005)

multiple 3rd degree tears due to a nuchal hand.


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## nia82 (May 6, 2008)

I had two small 2nd degree tears, and they never bothered me. I don't know how many stitches I had but it took the midwife 10-15 minutes to repair both tears. One was a labial tear, the other a perineal tear. Since it has been recently (August 19th) I can still see some sutures, they haven't dissolved completely just yet.
But as I said: only the labial tear burned once when I peed 5 hours after birth. That was it, it just was swollen for 2 days and then I was fine.








My sister gave birth just three weeks ahead of me and she had an epi (2nd degree), it took her way longer to heal (it still hurts her to sit down!) - epis make it worse!


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## emaye_to_2 (Jan 16, 2008)

I voted that I didn't tear.. with my first or second births. I did tear a little bit the midwives called them skidmarks but no stitches were necessary and it didn't bother me.


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## swissmiss2584 (Dec 29, 2007)

I just had my first and didn't tear. I had a home birth. 2 hr labor with 2 hrs of pushing. My midwife did lots of pulling and massaging on my perineum. My baby was 8lbs. My midwife said her head was big. I couldn't tell...I didn't even feel the ring of fire. I did have skid marks though.


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## LotusBirthMama (Jun 25, 2005)

I tore 2.5 inches internally, but my perineum stayed intact. I didn't tear at all in my 2nd birth.


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## Eaglevoice (Nov 30, 2004)

small tear, didn't need any stitches.


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## KiwiZ (Apr 4, 2004)

1st birth: c-sec
2nd birth: VBAC, 2nd degree tear

I remember being pregnant and looking at my dh's head and saying "man, your head is big. So is mine. YIKES!!!" LOL Sure 'nuf, both our kids had heads in the 98th percentile for head circumference LOL


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## DisplacedYooper (Aug 10, 2007)

My midwife apologised that she had to chart that it was a second degree tear because it was *just* into the muscle. I didn't have any stitches.


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## Emily's Mama (Apr 22, 2007)

I just had my first VBAC and had a 2nd degree tear.

I had a very short 2nd stage and didn't listen to my body and pushed her head out too fast, thinking that it would automatically take a while, given it was my first vaginal birth (my body didn't actually want to push that hard). I think she may have been posterior too. No one actually knew DD was crowing or saw her come out since the midwife turned to write some notes and I had a towel over my back. DH and doula never saw it either so she fell out onto the floor!

This was 1 week ago, and healing ok I guess, but if in the long run the healing is not physically easy then i will be annoyed about the "pushing too hard" thing.


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## FondestBianca (May 9, 2008)

I didn't tear on the outside at all... even though I was pushing with dd crowning for 3 HOURS NONSTOP. However, I did tear on the inside on both sides of my vagional wall about an inch and half in. Had to have a few stitches on each side. Healed well and luckily, it being on the inside once the horrid swelling went down my flow of urine didn't get into it too much and burn like crazy. I avloiding the kind of tare I was worried about and hope to avoid any this time around.


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## MaterPrimaePuellae (Oct 30, 2007)

Had DD at a hospital with a CNM; directed pushing in the "curl at the waist grab your knees" position. When I tried to hold back, not wanting to tear, the nurse said, 'Don't be afraid! Keep pushing!" so... I did. I'm not sure what was going on there. The CNM did a lot of massaging during the birth; I don't know how much that helped. If I had known then what I know now I would probably have been squatting or standing. Anyway. Next time!








In the end, it was only a 1st degree tear with a couple of stitches that healed pretty well (i think she mismatched the tissue a wee bit, but it is now fine). It was *almost* bad though, I think-- I noticed later a very sore spot near the inner labia where it seems like the skin almost tore through from within...







: I think if I had not had the directed pushing and had labored in a different position things would have been even better.


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## Belle (Feb 6, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *soso-lynn* 
A little off-topic, but by definition, percentiles only go up to 100. You can, however say that she was 20% larger than the 99th percentile.

No, not true. If you look up her head circumference size on one of those charts it was off the chart.


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## bobandjess99 (Aug 1, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Belle* 
No, not true. If you look up her head circumference size on one of those charts it was off the chart.

Thats EXACTLY what she just said. the chart does not go up to the "120th" percentile..it doesn't EXIST! your child was OFF the chart. the correct way to say it is that your child was 20% bigger than the TOP of the chart.

anyway...to add in my vote, many, MANY very bad tears internally and externally, in all directions, front back and sideways, including perineal, labial, urethral and clitoral tears. Both times. Both unassisted. Both sucked.
My body "chose" its position and pushed on it's own both times..both times i labored in water and did numerous other things to try and prevent tears. I just tear. My skin has *zero* stretch to it.
This last time, i very nearly tore into the rectum, but just *barely* didn't..the wall is Paper-thin in one place though......my bladder and uterus are prolapsed, because they fell down when everything tore and there is nothing left to hold them up.


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## organicmommy05 (Jan 16, 2007)

I tore up and was severly swollen for a few days which made walking difficult, however, I was still much better off then any of my friends that had epis.


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## zoeyzoo (Jul 6, 2007)

I had a 2nd degree. Basically UCed so no one told me to push. I just let my body push ss out. I couldn't believe I tore. I was in no pain during or after from it except for a little but of swell that I felt PP when sitting down on something hard.


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## MyBoysBlue (Apr 27, 2007)

I didn't tear for either. My first was in hospital with coached pushing but it was all natural so I felt the urge to push. I did have some skid marks which is just really stretched skin. My doc was going to give me and episiotomy but I told him I would rather tear in the middle of pushing. It was a good thing he listened to me because if he didn't I would have needed stitches to sew up his cut. My second was a UC and I had just skid marks again.


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## Belia (Dec 22, 2007)

Little Colin decided that he was feeling shy and came out with his hand next to his face, so I had a first degree tear with one stitch that could be considered second degree. If it wasn't for the nuchal hand, I don't think I would have torn at all!

It's funny- in his ultrasound pics he had his hand/arm up, he came out that way, and even now he'll often throw his arm up over his face when he's BFing or just laying around. Weird!


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## durafemina (Feb 11, 2004)

I had a 1st degree tear that healed without stitches and a labial tear that had 3 stitches put in. Homebirth on a birth stool - absolutely no coached pushing, but a HUGE pushing urge.
I've healed very well.


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## 3pink1blue (Jun 23, 2008)

I had 12 stitches with my first. never tore with the next 3 tho.


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## sapphire_chan (May 2, 2005)

2nd degree, 5 stitches, felt fine after a week so I voted "not that bad"


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## ssolberg99 (Mar 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Mommy2Austin* 
I tore because they had me pushing when he hadn't fully turned so he was coming out sideways.

This happened w/my first too.


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## jazzybaby9 (Feb 27, 2007)

I tore really really badly. The doctor tore me first, while I was pushing and now I know to take it slow. I rushed her out and pushed and pushed without letting her head stretch me. My vagina will bever be the same


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## Melian (Sep 22, 2008)

2nd degree tear but no stitches in that one. I also had a minor tear in the front and got 1 stitch over there. Front stitch area is no problem at all anymore, back tear is sometimes a little bit uncomfortable during sexual relations (KY jelly solves it!).


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