# Anyone else started a keepsake box or memorial?



## PB's Mom (Nov 20, 2001)

I started putting together a keepsake box to remember my baby. I bought a rubber stamp with angel wings to stamp on the box, and I found some items to put inside, such as some little knit baby clothes, booties, and hats (the size of a sticker --made for scrapbooking.) I also put a little Cross charm, and a cute shirt from Gymboree with 2 cherubs on the front, and some pop-out wings on the back. I'll also put a copy of my last ultrasound in the box.

Has anyone done something similar? I'd like ideas for memorials. I'm thinking about starting a website, and I'd have a section for miscarriage/child loss and I'd like to offer keepsake boxes and items to put inside. I just bought an expensive embroidery machine, so I could make little pillows with angels or angel wings and a saying such as "I'll hold you in heaven some day." Any other ideas?

Hugs to everyone going through this!!


----------



## coralsmom (Apr 1, 2005)

Hi... I have kept everything from my pregnancy- paperwork from the hospital, pictures of me when I was pregnant but didn't know, all of the cards that friends and family sent for her baby shower and then all of the cards of condolence, the prenantal appointment cards that my CNM gave me, basically everything and anything that reminds me of the time I had with my daughter. Our hospital gave us a small handpainted box that an artist made and donated to them for this purpose- she included a note offering her thoughts and kind words. They put my daughter's footprints in, as well as a lock of her hair taped to a piece of paper. There was a paper measuring tape that had a place to write how long she was. Also her ID bracelet, and I added my ID bracelet, and her 17 week sonogram photos, and there is a knit hat that I think she wore after she was born- but there was one from the funeral home too, so I don't know if she wore two, of if they put this in the box as a momento. When her photos come back from the hospital, we will include these too. We wrote her a long letter about us, and told her about dreams we had for her life, and special places we would go to think of her- and a photo album filled with pictures of her home, of us, and other important pictures. We made copies of the letter and the photo album, the originals are in her coffin with her, and the copies we kept to put in her box with us.

I think these boxes are a very kind gesture from the hospital and the woman who made them- although it is hard to leave there with a box and not your baby... we actually had to go back the following day because this was too hard for us to do. But this may be something that you may want to do if your hospital doesn't already offer something like this. Having a box specifically for parents who have gone thru a pregnancy loss of any kind was very special.

In her obituary, we suggested that our friends, family, etc. could send a donation to our small hospital's OB unit, set aside in order for them to purchase many, many books, pamphlets, and other information about losing your child- whether it happened very early, or at full term like our daughter, or after the baby was born- a resource library that parents could borrow from to read all they wanted or needed about losing a baby. The day after my birth, the nurse brought me three books they had about losing a baby. I didn't read them until the next day- but I really feel that the information in them was time-sensitive... if I had read a small part of them when I was at the hospital, I could have and would have made a few different decisions- about holding our daughter, etc. These books are so important, I feel, to understanding what has happened. We are very comforted to know that gifts in our daughter's memory will be used for this purpose- to help the next family who this happens to... it doesn't happen too often in our small hospital, but it definately happens, so there will be a next time, sadly.

You didn't have a long time with your babes- but it doesn't really matter, you bonded with them and fell in love with them, and the great loss is the same. I had made a website so that family and freinds could check out the baby pictures when there were some to take- in the mean time I had posted pictures of her nursery and pictures of me pregnant with her. I've kept all of the pictures there, and after I came home from the hospital, I changed what I had written, and wrote all of what we knew at that point about our daughter... it is too painful for me to go there now, but it is a small memorial site that my family can see.

I think anything that is done to help is a great thing- my grandmother lost a son at full term in 1949, her RH was negative and his positive, and he died. No one talked about it! She couldn't and didn't grieve openly about this tremendous loss- she suffered a lot throughout her life because she didn't have an accepted outlet for her grief. At least now there is a more open cultural view and acceptance of parents who grieve their lost babies. This being one of them! I am sorry for your loss of your babes- I am grieving with you. Coral's mom- Coral Rose, stillborn 03/21/05...love her so much!!!!!


----------



## warriorprincess (Nov 19, 2001)

We also have a handpainted box from the hospital, with hat, gown and tiny blanket, lock of hair and a locket, measuring tape, and crib card. We have photos from the hospital, our own camera and the midwife. We have a huge box of condolence cards.







Many people brought us plants: we have two rosebushes, two peace lilies, and several plants that I can't identify. Dried flower wreath from the memorial. Memorial bulletin, the church bulletin where our famliy was placed in the prayers. We will later have a newsletter, the All Sain'ts Day Bulletin and the annual report that will list his name. Most of all, the tiny urn with his remains.

I have the story told on several discussion forums and the many responses printed out.

Unfortunately since he was our fourth, we just had boxes of hand me downs and yard sale stuff. Only a very few items that were just for him.


----------



## jetsmom (Feb 24, 2005)

i have a box of stuff that i keep thinking i will make into a scrapbook. my baby was 5 mos lod when she died - so i have tons of pictures and a measly 8 minutes of video. i have kept all the cards i got at my baby shower and all the congrats cards i got when she was born, as well as condolance cards. i have business cards from all the MDs and PTs involved toward the end. i also have her chart from the 6 week hospital stay she had right before she died - that is a book in itself. i am in nursing school now so theoretically i would be able to understand it all, but i havent been able to open it yet.

then i have her ashes under my bed, still in the plastic (blue - i think the funeral home thought she was a boy) box that came from the funeral home. cant decide if i will ever get a real urn - all the choices seem so unappealing to me. i thought i would eventaully bury her ashes, but even though i never look at the box i like sleeping near it and dont know if i could stand to put them in the ground. yikes


----------



## HaveWool~Will Felt (Apr 26, 2004)

I have a keep sake box for my daughter that died full term, March 2004.
It is very special to me and to my family.
Every once in a while I add something new to it.
I was given birthday cards on her birth/death date...these have also gone into her keep sake box.


----------



## sarah9774 (Feb 19, 2005)

My little sister made me a toy chest, a little memory box, and a step stool for the bathroom for my son Luke for a shower present. The toy chest has his name on it. I will be using this for his keep sakes when I get the energy up to put things into it.. He was stillborn at 40 weeks and 1 day.. I have the outfit from the hospital and several other momentos cards dried flowers from the funeral, pictures blankets, and so on.. I also bought a scrap book that I will be working on in the near future too.. My niece is going to make a shadow box for him.. she had bought it to put his birth story in it, but now it will be a memory box.. I miss him so much!! It has been two months and one week..


----------



## wheezie (Sep 18, 2004)

I have a handpainted box with a lock of hair, his hospital bracelts, the funeral programs, etc inside. Then I also have 4 shelves of my curio cabinet dedicated to Ryan and all of his "stuff"-a baby book we got from the funeral home







a pillow someone made me that has his pic on it as well as other things.

I get so peaceful (but sad) when I look through all of his things. I love being able to have it displayed though!


----------



## CB73 (Apr 16, 2005)

My first sons' handpainted memory box, donated by a local artist to the hospital has these items. 2 u/s I demanded they do just before inducing labor; both of our hospital bracelets, a knit blanket he lay on briefly, a seashell with BOTH of his tiny footprints in it, cap & booties donated by a kind volunteer, a newspaper clipping just noting the date, weather.

I also kept absolutely everything I got information-wise. All the records, hospital reports and info sheets. The death certificate. My DH's "visitor" pass.


----------



## 2devils_1angel (Oct 14, 2003)

my cousin who was to be ds2's godmother bought him an oak box with his name inscrobed on it. Inside I have a poem, his hat, a tiny blanket, sea shells (from the nurse) and a lock of his hair.
the hospital also gave us one with his hand/feet prints a mold of his hands, info papers. And one for ds1 to remember his brother by.
then i went and took some stuff out of the hospital one and bought a shadow box picture frame, inside of it I put, some of the petals from his flowers, his feet/hand pronts, his picture and a peom. Its on the wall right next tp pur family picture and my living kids pictures


----------

