# 7 year old afraid of everything, hypersensitive to certain clothing..



## Music-mommy (Jan 8, 2005)

I am posting in hopes that someone has insight on this. My daughter is now 7, and is still afraid of going to washroom, going in her bedroom, going anywhere alone in the house. She needs to be escorted to get dressed, go pee, you name it. We have been cosleeping since birth, but I am starting to think it might be nice if she started sleeping in her own room. And I'm wondering if perhaps what is holding her back and perpetuating her fears now is that she is not attempting to overcome them? I'm not sure, and feeling really frustrated at times, and not sure how to deal with it...My 3 year old can go get dressed alone, go to the washroom alone sometimes, my 7 year old still needs me to go everywhere with her...sometimes it's my 3 year old that say to her "i'll go with you so that you're not scared".

I did a bit of research on the internet and she has some of the symptoms of Sensory processing disorder (ie can't wear tight clothing, has to have underwear that are way too big for her, doesn't like certain clothing, gets really stressed if she doesn't have the right socks with the right underwear etc... ) But she only has a few of these symptoms.

I wonder if anyone out there has worked through these issues in a positive way?

Thanks
Dominique


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## zeldamomma (Jan 5, 2006)

My 8 year old was like that at age 7. She will still tell me tearfully that she doesn't like to be alone from time to time. Basically what happens is that she hears noises and imagines scary explanations. Now she will go upstairs and to the bathroom alone, and doesn't freak out about her socks and shoes anymore (hallelujah for that!) It seems like she outgrew it, I didn't do anything specific, although I did stop accompanying her to her bedroom and bathroom, and if she'd ask me to, I'd remind her that she is safe in our house. Sometimes she'd convince a sibling to go along, and sometimes she wouldn't go at all, but at some point she just started going on her own.

My dd has never coslept (it doesn't work for our family), but she does share a room with her sister. Could that be an option for you?

ZM


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## LynnS6 (Mar 30, 2005)

I would run out and get the book "Sensational Kids". Then I would look into a good occupational therapist who specializes in sensory issues.

We started OT with our son when he was 5. It made a HUGE difference in terms of reduced anxiety, confidence, and ability to deal with the world around him. Before OT, he was uncomfortable in his own skin. After OT, he's still sensitive, a bit prone to anxiety, but much better able to function.

A child doesn't need to have all the symptoms to have SPD. What I learned from our OT too is that the sensory symptoms can lead to anxiety and fears in other areas because the sensory info just isn't making sense. So, for example, our ds is very sound sensitive and was terrified of big noises before OT. One reason was because he couldn't localize the sound and it felt like it was on top of him. That had to do with his inability to find himself in space, something I'd never considered before, but was clearly an issue once I 'noticed' it.

You might also try supplements - Fish oil and B12. But OT is where I'd start.


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## PaxMamma (Jul 22, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *LynnS6* 
I would run out and get the book "Sensational Kids". Then I would look into a good occupational therapist who specializes in sensory issues.

We started OT with our son when he was 5. It made a HUGE difference in terms of reduced anxiety, confidence, and ability to deal with the world around him. Before OT, he was uncomfortable in his own skin. After OT, he's still sensitive, a bit prone to anxiety, but much better able to function.

A child doesn't need to have all the symptoms to have SPD. What I learned from our OT too is that the sensory symptoms can lead to anxiety and fears in other areas because the sensory info just isn't making sense. So, for example, our ds is very sound sensitive and was terrified of big noises before OT. One reason was because he couldn't localize the sound and it felt like it was on top of him. That had to do with his inability to find himself in space, something I'd never considered before, but was clearly an issue once I 'noticed' it.

You might also try supplements - Fish oil and B12. But OT is where I'd start.









:
this was exactly what i was thinking as i read your post. i'm a special education intervention specialist and see these types of kids. i would never presume to try and diagnose your child in anyway, esp. since we've never met, but some of what you say would certainly warrant an evaluation by an OT. OT can be very key, not just for the child, but also for YOU. as you learn how to help your child, you will feel more empowered, and your family will all benefit as a result.


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## Music-mommy (Jan 8, 2005)

Thanks so much for your comments... i didn't know about this sensory issue until yesterday when I started looking for help online.

I ordered these 2 books

"The Highly Sensitive Child: Helping Our Children Thrive When the World Overwhelms Them"
Elaine Aron; Paperback; CDN$ 12.37

Sold by: Amazon.com.ca, Inc.
1 "The Highly Intuitive Child: A Guide to Understanding and Parenting Unusually Sensitive and Empathic Children"
Catherine Crawford; Paperback; CDN$ 14.97

Are they good?

Dominique


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## sunnmama (Jul 3, 2003)

If you are interested in a book about anxiety in children, I highly recommend, and am currently re-reading, _Freeing Your Child from Anxiety_ by Tamar E. Chansky, Ph.D. My dd deals with both SPD and anxiety, and this book has been helpful for us. We tackled the SPD first (OT at age 3-4), and then saw a counselor to help her with anxiety later (age 6-7). The counseling was very successful for her (we only finished 3 months ago), and I am mining the book for tips to support her as she continues to grow in the big, big world


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## LynnS6 (Mar 30, 2005)

I LOVE the highly sensitive child, but I would add a book on Sensory Processing Disorder for you too. I would definitely also recommend "Sensational Kids".

I've got two highly sensitive children - one who has sensory processing disorder and one who doesn't. The difference is subtle, but important. Ds (7) is my 'disordered' kid and he just couldn't control his reactions. He couldn't get used to things. He couldn't figure out how to get his pants on! Seriously, he would lay out his pants and then move his body around to however they ended up. Dd is just as sensitive, but doesn't overreact, can regulate her reactions and can figure out where her body is in space.


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## BrooklynDoula (Oct 23, 2002)

You might look into homeopathy also of it is an option you are comfortable with. It has helped my son a lot and our homeopath also gave me some blank pellets that I give him "for bravery" and they make bed time go really smoothly when he is feeling anxious.


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