# I woke up and saw the comforter was over baby's face



## laohaire (Nov 2, 2005)

Jeez, that scared me!

I cosleep, obviously . . . but sure do not want her to suffocate. That was a scary moment.

Suggestions? Maybe she should have a separate blanket, and be placed over my blanket? Usually I only put comforter up to her waist, but last night (for the first time) I had a period of really deep sleep and apparently pulled the covers up. Thank god she was fine.

I really want to make cosleeping work - NOT for convenience as a lof of people think cosleeping is all about, but because I have multiple disabilities and this is the best way I can care for her. I do have a sidecar cosleeper, and I'm willing to try using it again, but I found it difficult to know when she was hungry even with her being right there (due to my disabilities).


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## amyandelle (Jul 5, 2004)

Hi, I don't know how old your dd is but when mine was under 1 year I wore really warm PJ's and slept with a very light blanket. I used a seperate blanket for my dd. She is now 20 months and we share a fleece blanket.
Amy


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## Charles Baudelaire (Apr 14, 2003)

Step 1: Take the comforter off the bed.
Step 2: Fold it up and put it in the closet.
Step 3: Put warm PJs on your baby and a baby blanket over him.
Step 4: Put warm PJs on you and sleep only under a light sheet.
Turn up the heat in the house if necessary.

It's not worth the risk to keep the comforter on the bed.


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## sevenkids (Dec 16, 2002)

Why do you think you woke up, mama? Because you're mama instincts are working! You intuitively knew you needed to do something for your baby. So something is very right here.
If it makes you feel better, give her a seperate blankie and put her on top of yours, but I really think that you and she are in sync and are doing just fine.


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## laohaire (Nov 2, 2005)

She's 10 weeks old. I think I will take everyone's suggestions and bundle us both up and use a lighter blanket - or I'll put her on top with her own blanket. I don't relish the idea of turning up the heat this winter if ya know what I mean!


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## laohaire (Nov 2, 2005)

You guys think an afghan (knitted with yarn) would be good? I just shoved mine in my nose and I could still breathe just fine. It's also fairly warm, though obviously not as warm as the comforter, so we'll still have to wear heavier bed-clothes.


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## BamBam'sMom (Jun 4, 2005)

I had this happen to me a few times and it scared me. I have found a few things that help. I use only a light blanket now and I keep a long-sleeved shirt by the bed in case I need it. I dress ds in a long-sleeved onesie and a blanket sleeper to keep him warm and then put him on top of my blanket. I really like the blanket sleeper, but if I had bought it myself I would have gotten the 100% cotton instead of microfleece, which doesn't breathe well.


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## alegna (Jan 14, 2003)

IMO a comforter is unlikely to suffocate a baby unless it's held down- usually the way a blanket finds its way over a co-sleeping babe it's suspended a few inches above their face. Also- you DID wake up.










-Angela


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## thedevinemissm (Apr 9, 2004)

The same thing happened to me with DS. It scared the crap out of me.

I'm with "sevenkids" ~ you woke up b/c you were cosleeping. Most likely b/c baby was "struggling" with the blanket and you noticed the movement.

I also agree with "Charles" that you should probably ditch the comforter and dress both of yourselves warmly or heat the house.

I wouldn't move babe out of the bed, I'd change the way you're sleeping together to make it safe!


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## RedWine (Sep 26, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *laohaire*
You guys think an afghan (knitted with yarn) would be good? I just shoved mine in my nose and I could still breathe just fine. It's also fairly warm, though obviously not as warm as the comforter, so we'll still have to wear heavier bed-clothes.

YES!

We have always used aghans while cosleeping. Dd1 is old enough for a usual blanket now, and doesn't start off with us anymore anyway (she's almost three). But dd2 (7 months old) and I share an afghan. I think it's impossible to suffocate under an afghan! (Not that I'd test that theory).


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## lnitti (Jun 14, 2004)

at what age would it be safe to use a comforter? dd is 19 months...


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## nurturinglovely (Sep 1, 2005)

I hate that - it freaks me out!


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## alegna (Jan 14, 2003)

I would say 19 months is PLENTY old enough, but honestly I was never paranoid about that sort of thing.

-Angela


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## lisac77 (May 27, 2005)

I'm with Angela - I just didn't obsess about this stuff too much. Anyway, when my nursling was sleeping with me in the winter he was either nursing or on his side facing my body (in a "ready to nurse" position), so there was always an open space around his head even if the blankets were pulled up high.

I think the danger would come if the child were trapped in the blanket somehow - unlikely to happen with an adult right there!


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## Mallory (Jan 2, 2002)

You woke up for a reason, I wouldn't worry about it, but then I wouldn't be able to sleep with lots of clothes on, and actually my youngest could never sleep with much clothes on either.

I just keep what ever blankets we have, lots of adults and children sleep with their heads under the covers.


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## mahogny (Oct 16, 2003)

Along with the dressing warmer and using lighter blankets, I'd also suggest you and DH/SO (if one is in bed with you) to use separate blankets, so there's no blanket suspended over baby's head. DH and I haven't shared a blanket since our DS was born 4 years ago; we each have our own blanket and the babe du jour sleeps in between us, blanket-free.


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## haleyelianasmom (Nov 5, 2005)

I've had scares like that. I switch off where my dd sleeps (on my left or right) during the night so when she nurses in the night she can switch off breasts. One time, I had switched her to my left side with dh on my right. I forgot that I had moved her and totally panicked when I woke up and dh was right up next to me. I thought he had rolled on her! I then realized that I was moved so close to him because dd was on my other side. duh


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## mommycaroline (Mar 2, 2004)

I might be a little worried about a loosely knit (or crocheted) afghan for entanglement reasons. I sleep with a waffle weave blanket and a sheet, and that sometimes gets tiny fingers caught in it. A larger weave would only increase the likelihood of that happening.

Oh, and by the way, why isn't "best way I can care for her" about convenience. I totally cosleep because it's conveniently the best way I can care for my kids. Aside from the fact that I'm too darned lazy to wake up and walk to another room just to nurse a baby, I suffer from insomnia sometimes. That kind of waking would seriously wreak havoc on my health. I have a hard time falling back asleep if I get too much awake.

Just thought I'd point that out.


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## laohaire (Nov 2, 2005)

She wasn't struggling or anything, she was fine. It just scared me.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mommycaroline*
Oh, and by the way, why isn't "best way I can care for her" about convenience. I totally cosleep because it's conveniently the best way I can care for my kids. Aside from the fact that I'm too darned lazy to wake up and walk to another room just to nurse a baby, I suffer from insomnia sometimes. That kind of waking would seriously wreak havoc on my health. I have a hard time falling back asleep if I get too much awake.

Just thought I'd point that out.









Well, that was being a little defensive on my part, because I've heard anti-cosleepers criticize how we're doing it for our convenience and disregarding our babies' safety and best interests. (Of course, I believe those same people are guilty of just that when they let their babies CIO...).


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## ladybugchild77 (Jun 18, 2004)

Mama! I had the same thing happen to me last week (dd is 8mo though...) and it freaked me out! She was perfectly fine though and sleeping "like a baby"...ha ha...excuse the pun...


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## mommycaroline (Mar 2, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *laohaire*
Well, that was being a little defensive on my part, because I've heard anti-cosleepers criticize how we're doing it for our convenience and disregarding our babies' safety and best interests. (Of course, I believe those same people are guilty of just that when they let their babies CIO...).

I see by your post count you're new here. Welcome to MDC! You're in safe territory here when it comes to cosleeping. I can't imagine anyone who posts here would be critical of cosleeping practices for convenience sake (or for any sake, for that matter!) In fact, it's one of the reasons I point out when I advocate for cosleeping. "Practiced safely, cosleeping is infinitely more convenient for the mother than walking down the hall." Among many other reasons.


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## laohaire (Nov 2, 2005)

I am a refugee from an Evil parenting board







Can you tell?

I totally "had it" with the inductions at 35 weeks, CIO, FF, "my 3 week old is spoiled already," blah blah blah, and ran for the hills.


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## Jane's4 (Oct 18, 2005)

It is testament to your well-developed intuition that you woke up when your baby needed you. ITA that it is unlikely that your baby would suffocate just from the comforter loosely riding up. But it will give you peace of mind to keep baby on top with a blanket sleeper or lighter blanket.
I have a co-sleeper sidecarred to my bed, too, but like you, I am more able to respond to my baby's needs when he is right next to me. So the co-sleeper is doing duty as bedrail, nightstand, diaper storage instead









Congratulations, welcome, and keep on co-sleeping--it's best for moms and for babies.


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## mommycaroline (Mar 2, 2004)

Whoa, whoa, whoa, "sunnihoneyluv". Them's fighting words. "If you love her enough you will" blah, blah, blah. (insert any action here) I see you're new here too. And, at risk of being sucked into a troll war, I just want to say this is a great place to get educated about learning how to cosleep safely.

I don't know anything about laohaire's disabilities (and neither do you unless you know her from somewhere else) so assuming that her disabilities prevents her from caring for her properly is just not fair. I know plenty of non disabled adults who don't care for their babies properly, IMNSHO. You just can't assume anything like that and expect to be right.

Welcome to you both. I wish you an enlightening journey as you find your way around MDC. I'm a frequent lurker, not so much a poster, but I know there is an abundance of women here that you can learn a lot from, and get amazing suport from. Leave your mainstream beliefs behind and step on over to attached parenting. Preconceived notions subject to questioning.


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## laohaire (Nov 2, 2005)




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## alegna (Jan 14, 2003)




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## Charles Baudelaire (Apr 14, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *laohaire*
You guys think an afghan (knitted with yarn) would be good? I just shoved mine in my nose and I could still breathe just fine. It's also fairly warm, though obviously not as warm as the comforter, so we'll still have to wear heavier bed-clothes.

NO. Afghans can get bunched up against the baby's face and hold in carbon dioxide even if they're not.

Really. Just turn up the heat.


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## courtenay_e (Sep 1, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *laohaire*
You guys think an afghan (knitted with yarn) would be good? I just shoved mine in my nose and I could still breathe just fine. It's also fairly warm, though obviously not as warm as the comforter, so we'll still have to wear heavier bed-clothes.


Haven't read all the responses, but a knitted afghan could be a bad idea...fingers or toes could get tangled and lose circulation, ick...you might try the euro style "sleep sacs". They are blanket weight and you put baby in jammies and then into the sac and zip it up to their chest. My kids hated it, but my neighbor (who's german) gave me all of hers that her kids outgrew...they used them from birth and she swears by 'em. Good luck!


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## BetsyPage (Mar 5, 2004)

We addressed this problem by having the comforter on 2/3rds of the bed, my dh's side... there was just enough to cover my legs/back, but no way for it to reach dd... I tucked it in at the bottom so it couldn't be yanked accidentally. We never had a problem!


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## homemademomma (Apr 1, 2004)

oh wow, so a lot of you cosleepers dont use blankets?!?? i love my blankets. when ds was small he slept under the comforter with me. once or twice i woke up and he was under the blanket, but i think moms intuition wakes us up when that happens, or else if baby couldnt breathe or the blanket was right on his/her face, baby would shift around, which would wake us up.

really, though- blankets arent plastic bags! it would take a long time for a baby to suffocate under a blanket. seriously. as long as there arent lots of froofy lacy parts or fringe or something, there is usually plenty of airflow under a blanket. thats jmo, though. everyone should do what they think is safest.

ds hates blankets now, though, so he just sleeps in a tshirt and socks.


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## plantmama (Jun 24, 2005)

I just had to add that the only time I found my ds sleeping with a blanket over his head was when he was taking a nap in his arms reach crib. I was totally freaked out! Just goes to show that cribs are NOT safer.
I always had some sort of set up when he was really little where blankets wouldn't get over his head. Usually dh had the comforter on and I had it on only half way up and ds not at all. I put him to sleep with warm pjs and a soft little hat.
I am another lover of cosleeping!


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## mommycaroline (Mar 2, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *homemademomma*
really, though- blankets arent plastic bags! it would take a long time for a baby to suffocate under a blanket. seriously. as long as there arent lots of froofy lacy parts or fringe or something, there is usually plenty of airflow under a blanket. thats jmo, though. everyone should do what they think is safest.

No, blankets aren't plastic bags, but they do increase the chance of rebreathing, which is the concern here. Babies don't die of suffocation under a blanket, but when the air doesn't circulate very well, the CO2 levels increase, sometimes dramatically. For a baby's newly developing system, this can rapidly lead to CO2 poisoning at levels that would be perfectly fine for an adult. Certainly not every time, but enough times to be statistically significant. If there's something *easy* you can do to prevent something tragic like infant death from happening, why not do it? Of course, everyone has to make their own choices, but choosing to cosleep safely and being aware of any risks is a wise course of action.

Dr. James McKenna has some excellent cosleeping guidelines that anyone who is cosleeping should consult. Cosleeping Guidelines


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## bamamom (Dec 9, 2004)

this has happened to us before... I just wake up and move it. ANd if it really gets on him. he flops his arms and legs to push it off


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## mraven721 (Mar 10, 2004)

nak

Some posts and quotes were removed from this thread.


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