# Help 5 year old won't wipe



## LaurenS (Aug 7, 2003)

Okay how do I get my 5 year old to wipe himself after going to the bathroom? He will sit there all day and wait for us to come wipe him when he is done. If I gently say, here let me show you how to do it yourself, he goes crazy. A few months before his 5th birthday, he said that he didn't want to wipe himself until he was 5. So I accepted that and kept wiping him without saying anything. Then when he turned 5 he said he won't wipe until he turns 6. He is making excuses. It is driving us crazy. How do we get started?

-Lauren


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## treemom2 (Oct 1, 2003)

My DD was almost 6 when she started wiping herself after pooing. I showed her how to wrap the tp around her hand so she didn't get messy. I also told her that I was happy to wipe her with a babywipe after she wiped herself if she wanted me to. She now wipes herself all the time and will also help wipe her brother if I am busy at the time. Also, is he going to go to school? He will have to wipe himself there. . .


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## LaurenS (Aug 7, 2003)

No, we are unschooling. But yesterday, he spent the day at his friend's house. As soon as he got in the door, he ran to the bathroom to poop. I asked him if he was holding this all day and he said no. But I'm pretty sure he was. He won't let anyone else wipe him but me or DH.

When did your DD start wiping herself? Did it take a long time before she was doing it on her own? Or did she just decide that she would do it herself when she was almost 6?

See, I don't even mind that. Like if he is making an effort, I don't mind helping him for a while. It's just that he refuses to do it himself at all that bothers me.

And of course I have joked with him that he better buy the neighbor's house so that when he's 35, he can still come next door for us to wipe him. And I know comments like that don't help. I'm just super frustrated.


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## treemom2 (Oct 1, 2003)

Ugh, I know how frustrating it is. . .I too would make comments to DD about her being the only person her age that didn't wipe herself. She too would absolutely refuse (even when we tried "rewards"). I'm not really sure why she suddenly decided to do it herself. . .she just started doing it one day. I will tell you she didn't do it very well (many panties were stained), but it did finally happen.


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## stormborn (Dec 8, 2001)

Wow I just realized dd hasn't asked me to wipe lately.







It does end eventually, but oh can I empathize. I think what finally did it was me running out of earshot as soon as she went into the bathroom. Eventually she got bored sitting there and started trying.


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## shantimama (Mar 11, 2002)

It does happen eventually. One of my chidlren was ready by 5, anoteh rneeded help for much longer.


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## beanma (Jan 6, 2002)

There's a similar thread in Childhood Years you might like to check out - http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=877120 . I'm coaching my 4 yr old right now. She does it, but I have to stand there and tell her what to do.


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## LaurenS (Aug 7, 2003)

Thanks for the support. I have gone out of earshot, but he will just sit there. Sometimes I'm in the middle of something and he calls. I tell him that he can wipe himself or else he will have to wait a while. He'll just sit there forever and sing to himself.


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## Leilalu (May 29, 2004)

I have the same issue. This is how I generally wake up in the morning.

But dd has always been clingy. She also won't get out of bed unless to pee, until I get up.

I have tried everything, but waiting seems to work ok. At least I think it eventually will. I make her wait until I finish what I am doing. I let her know I don't mind, but that she will ahve to wait if I'm busy.

Poop is different, I prefer to wipe that.
Although I know she wipes herself when out at church.


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## Fuamami (Mar 16, 2005)

My dd does the same thing. I have instituted a policy of her practicing, and then me checking. This was an idea that someone had here. I also talked to her about how singing the alphabet song while washing your hands would ensure that they were really clean. I've been warning her lately that soon she'll have to start wiping herself, too.


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## Breeder (May 28, 2006)

DS had a hard time with this too. I started having him do it himself, then I'd check with a wipe, then I'd check visually, then finally after a few wks of him being 'all clean'. I started saying, "I don't need to check, you do such a good job on your own."

Good luck.


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## transformed (Jan 26, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *LaurenS* 
Okay how do I get my 5 year old to wipe himself after going to the bathroom? He will sit there all day and wait for us to come wipe him when he is done. If I gently say, here let me show you how to do it yourself, he goes crazy. A few months before his 5th birthday, he said that he didn't want to wipe himself until he was 5. So I accepted that and kept wiping him without saying anything. Then when he turned 5 he said he won't wipe until he turns 6. He is making excuses. It is driving us crazy. How do we get started?

-Lauren









:


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## candiland (Jan 27, 2002)

I'm having the same prob., but he will actually lie to avoid it. Like, claim he wiped - there'll even be t.p. in the toilet! - so when I go to check him with a wipe or t.p., it's obvious he's fibbing so I'll do it for him. I don't want to be a monster, but this is getting old. He'll be six next month!! I'll be watching this thread veeeeeeeeeery closely, lol.


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