# having my first miscarriage at 5 weeks



## marinak1977 (Feb 24, 2009)

Hi Everyone, I'm new here. I've been trying TTC for over a year and finally found out 3 days ago that I am pregnant. Well, not it seems like "was pregnant". This would've been our first. Now it's 5 weeks, and I am in terrible pain and bleeding. My temp is still high and the test still says "pregnant" but I think the little "worm" is not going to make it. I have scheduled a Dr's appt for tomorrow morning, I guess I should go to it and find out what happened.








what do I do now?


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## millefleur (Nov 25, 2008)

I'm so sorry. I know how much it hurts







. So, you're having bad cramps and bleeding?

I'm so glad you have an appointment with your doctor tomorrow. You should definitely go. They will probably want to do an ultrasound and/or draw blood to find out what is going on, and then if you are definitely miscarrying they will discuss options with you.

If you start bleeding very heavily (soaking several pads in an hour), feeling faint, or develop a fever before your doctor's appointment, you should go to the ER.

Otherwise, lie down if you can, relax, drink a lot of fluids, get a lot of rest, and have someone take care of you. You can take ibuprofen and use a heating pad for the physical pain.

Do you have a lot of support? This is a place where you will find a lot of support and advice from women who have experienced losses of all kinds. Please keep us posted on what happens! Many hugs to you.


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## Deir (Aug 19, 2005)

I had my first m/c after 2 and a half yrs of IF. It seems doubly unfair when you've been trying so some time. i will tell you that I got pg again the 2nd cycle after my mc and now have a 5 yr old and a 3 yr old! (((((hugs)))))


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## MovingMomma (Apr 28, 2004)

I'm so sorry.


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## ursusarctos (Dec 16, 2008)

I am so sorry, marinak1977.







I had a miscarriage at 5 weeks when the pregnancy was an accident (though desired by me), and I still had to cry in my fiance's arms for hours.
Just because you have one miscarriage does not mean you will always have them!!! I know that thought will enter your mind because it entered mine too. I briefly considered getting into all the possible reasons why it might have happened, but decided not to torture myself with speculation after the fact. The reality is that early miscarriages are very common and often don't have any cause that you could have done anything about (unless it's some kind of hormonal imbalance, in which case there is something you can do about it!)
Don't be afraid to let yourself be sad - but let yourself let go, too.


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## marinak1977 (Feb 24, 2009)

Everyone, thank you so much for your support and advice. I think I am losing the eggy aka "little worm". I am bleeding heavily and have severe cramps now, as well as dry mouth, nausea, headache, and sharp pain in the back of my neck. I don't know if I have a fever, but DH is here with me and is giving me rooibus tea, and neck rubs. I think if the pain doesn't get better I want to go to the ER. Should I be really worried, or are these common symptoms of the mc?








And also, Thank you everyone for being here. It means so much! Although I am brokenhearted over this, I am still glad we at least got this far. Hopefully next time it will be better.


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## Carlyle (Mar 31, 2007)

I'm so sorry you're going through this--especially after trying for so long! Drink lots of fluids and make sure you're eating lots of iron. I had a major headache during and a few days after my m/c (something about fluctuating hormone levels--I guess it's common). I also had serious labor-like cramps during the process. It's not the same for everyone, but it really felt a lot like labor to me--it sort of helped me to know what labor felt like because I realized what was going on. I had nausea at the peak of the m/c too. I'm so sorry









Good for you to be tracking whether you have a fever, and also just make sure that you're not soaking through "too many" pads per hour. I forget what the magic number is, but you want to make sure you're not losing too much blood.

It helped me deal with the cramps/contractions to think consciously about letting the baby go and relaxing. During labor it was easier to relax because I wasn't trying to keep the baby in, you know? During the m/c I was so sad to be losing the baby that I was unconsciously clenching up each contraction. I'm really sorry. Hopefully you will be through the worst of it soon.









eta: is the pain like contractions (i.e. it comes in waves, peaks, and then fades away again?) If so, I think it's "normal" If it's more continuous, then I don't have advice and would be more tempted to call the doctor.


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## Fuamami (Mar 16, 2005)

Have you talked to anyone?

The pain in your neck sounds like it could be kind of scary. Pain in your shoulder could be a sign of a ectopic pg.


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## millefleur (Nov 25, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Carlyle* 
Good for you to be tracking whether you have a fever, and also just make sure that you're not soaking through "too many" pads per hour. I forget what the magic number is, but you want to make sure you're not losing too much blood.

Yes, Carlyle (Hi Carlyle - I was wondering where you have been!














is right.

It's very important to take your temperature and make sure you don't have a fever. What you're experiencing sounds within the realm of normal for a miscarriage, but again, if you are feverish, in too much pain, or bleeding through more than 2-3 pads an hour, definitely go to the ER.


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## notjustmamie (Mar 7, 2007)

I'm so sorry you're going through this.

My last m/c was at 5 weeks. I kept thinking it shouldn't hurt so much when the baby was that small.


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## millefleur (Nov 25, 2008)

I went back and found the thread from when I was having my miscarriage, and I received some EXCELLENT advice, so I thought I should share:

http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=1017185


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## MovingMomma (Apr 28, 2004)

Do be aware that pain in the shoulders can be from abdominal bleeding during an ectopic.


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## Amy&4girls (Oct 30, 2006)

I'm so sorry you're going through this.


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## zonapellucida (Jul 16, 2004)

mama


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## jess_paez (Jul 5, 2008)

s


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## millefleur (Nov 25, 2008)

How are you doing? Did you have your doctor appt today?


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## marinak1977 (Feb 24, 2009)

Just got back from the doctor's my HCG titer is way low, so the development probably stopped a few days ago, and according to the nurse the majority of the miscarriage must've happened yesterday.







I have smaller cramps today, although I am still bleeding. I'll be meeting with a nutritionist this weekend, and with an OBGYN in 2 weeks to figure out what I should do next.
Thank you everyone for your support. I knew that this could happen, but I didn't realize how hard it would be...







I only had a few days of being pregnant and yet it is so hard to not be.







Thank you everyone for listening...


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## MovingMomma (Apr 28, 2004)

I'm so sorry.


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## millefleur (Nov 25, 2008)

I'm sorry. We're here for you.


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## marinak1977 (Feb 24, 2009)

All of you mamas are so wonderful. Thank you! I'm trying to look on the bright side (although right now it's not easy














. We never got this far before, and at least that means we can get pregnant. So hopefully next time will be right. I am going to get super healthy in the meantime.
So







here, but really appreciating your







s, and my DH







:. He's been just awesome through all of this. And our 3X







: really knew that I needed TLC and just laid near me.







s to all.


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## darcytrue (Jan 23, 2009)

I'm so sorry.









Quote:


Originally Posted by *ursusarctos* 
Just because you have one miscarriage does not mean you will always have them!!! I know that thought will enter your mind because it entered mine too.

I agree. I m/c fourteen years ago with my first pregnancy and it was a blighted ovum. I was in the 6th week. I got pregnant with my oldest son a month later and now I'm pregnant with number three.


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## Tear78 (Nov 28, 2008)

I'm so sorry, marina! I lost my first pregnancy this week, too. It's so helpful to talk with people who have gone through the same thing, and to hear that the m/c is not your fault, that you did nothing wrong. Like people have said, I feel comforted that we got this far, and hopeful for a healthy baby the next time around.


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## marinak1977 (Feb 24, 2009)

Oh, Tear78, I am so sorry you lost yours too... I know that I shouldn't lose hope and be positive, and yet - when this pregnancy was so wanted, it is easy to be







. 2 days after my m/c started was the worst day - like I was in a cloud of doom. 







:
Now I am looking forward, stalking my temperature and can't wait to start ovulating again. I want to move forward. I joined a couple of TTC threads, for TTC #1 in your 30s, and TTC #1 after a m/c. It is helpful to be there... Hoping that next time won't take a year, and would bring us








I love hearing encouraging words here, thank you...


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