# Extracurricular Activities for Introvert?



## olliepop (Jun 26, 2007)

My dd, who will be 5 next week, is extremely introverted. We thought it might help to sign her up for a few activities. This summer she played soccer and tennis. Although she liked soccer, she often seemed lost on the field b/c some of the other children were experienced and very competitive. Tennis seemed more up her alley and she really seemed to like it a lot. We are going to continue with tennis for the rest of the summer, but does anyone have any other activities they recommend for a quiet, reserved child?


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## jillmamma (Apr 11, 2005)

DS is also introverted (autistic actually) and is really enjoying his tumbling class at our local gym. It is him and 3 other 5 year olds so a small class. He also loved the semi-private swim lessons we just did. Maybe she would like a dance class? Another possibility is some type of art class or music lessons? Maybe check with your local parks & rec department and see what they offer? I am also very introverted, and enjoyed girl scouts as we had a small troop so it was pretty laid back.


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## LeftField (Aug 2, 2002)

I am a very introverted person, who is the Mom of two very introverted boys (and my dh is introverted as well). My advice is to be careful about extras, simply because very introverted people get drained easily by other people and they need alone time to recharge. When I was a child, I always was involved in a lot of activities, even though I'm extremely introverted. But I have to watch myself because if I do too much, it just becomes stressful and overwhelming. I think a lot of people in our extraverted society believe that introversion can be lessened or should be fixed. In my opinion, it's a strength to be able be happily alone.

Ok, having said that...

My oldest introverted child enjoys art classes a lot. He is *very* introverted but he is not shy at all. He's one of those gregarious introverts. He enjoys being with other kids and he's good at it but he simply gets drained by it very easily. When he's by himself, he's as happy as a clam and I swear he never gets bored. Introverts are able to be their own best friends.









On the contrary, my youngest introverted child IS very shy. So, I have to be careful with him. This is going to sound NUTS, Ok, but I swear that this worked for my shy son, for myself and for one of the shiest girls in my grade school: drama class. For all three of us, drama allowed us to tap into our very rich inner imagination and helped us come out of our shell a bit in a very enjoyable way. You would think that it would be the opposite for a shy introvert. But drama has been highly successful for my shy introvert. His drama teacher explained that many actors are actually very shy but that when they act, it allows them to be someone else and they are just very good observers. It may not work with your child but it may be something that she loves.

ETA: I should clarify that it's not a production/performance related drama class, rather it's what's called a "process class". The focus on the class is playing make believe. There are no lines to memorize or anything like that. It's just like a make-believe class. Ours is through our local children's theatre.


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## LauraLoo (Oct 9, 2006)

My ds (7) is also introverted -- he has done very well with swimming classes and gymnastics, as well as karate. I have seen a theme of sports that are still individualistic. Baseball is another sport that he seems to like. He also didn't like soccer because it was too chaotic for him -- kids kicking and scrambling all over the place!

LeftField -- the drama teacher is right -- many, many professional actors and performers are introverts. I've seen my ds change into a completely different person right before my eyes when he gets on stage -- completely confident even though many, many people were looking right at him. It's been explained to me that because introverts are highly empathetic, they more or less "become" the character they are portraying, so they adopt those qualities on stage. It's less personal on stage.


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## Pancakes (Jan 22, 2008)

My DD is quite introverted and any kind of team sports or activity is torture for her. Once we learned that lesson we enrolled her into various activities that were not team oriented until we landed on one she liked, martial arts. She started when she was 7 and decided to take a break after she achieved her black belt. She shined while in class, and was even able to teach a few classes, something we NEVER saw her able to feel comfortable doing.

So I will echo some of the comments of not over loading an introverted child, and to go with a more individual activity.


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## LeftField (Aug 2, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *LauraLoo* 
LeftField -- the drama teacher is right -- many, many professional actors and performers are introverts. I've seen my ds change into a completely different person right before my eyes when he gets on stage -- completely confident even though many, many people were looking right at him. It's been explained to me that because introverts are highly empathetic, they more or less "become" the character they are portraying, so they adopt those qualities on stage. It's less personal on stage.

Ah...this makes sense to me about it being "less personal". I am an excellent public speaker, as long as there are at least 10 people in front of me. The more people in the audience, the easier it gets. I used to be a corporate trainer. I used to love classes that got close to 20, whereas my colleagues liked the small, personal classes; those classes terrified me!

Now, I "get" what you are saying about drama because it's similar, I guess.


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## straighthaircurly (Dec 17, 2005)

Aim to avoid team sports and focus on individual sports and activities where she can just absorb things at her own rate without the team performance pressure and distraction of having to coordinate with team mates. Swimming, karate, gymnastics all come to mind. For other activities art and music classes or foreign language might appeal to her.


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## beanma (Jan 6, 2002)

My introverts love dance class. I imagine the reasons are similar to the others given for drama and the individual sports. We also have a fabulous dance studio that gets rid of all the things I don't like about dance — having to wear the "right" clothes and wear your hair the "right" way, etc, and there's no focus on body image stuff. They're very inclusive of kids of all different abilities. For several years a girl with severe cerebral palsy (I think) who was confined to a motorized wheelchair took dance with her mom helping her. They have several down syndrome girls, too, and a smattering of boys. If you could find a studio like ours I would say go for it, but I think you do need to check out the studio first and maybe go for a free trial class 'cause some dance places are the opposite of what I would want for my girls. They do have a recital at the end, which my girls absolutely love, but sometimes kids just go to the dress rehearsal and skip the recital or skip both. They get a costume either way.


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## DaughterOfKali (Jul 15, 2007)

Music lessons/class. If your child enjoys music, then it's a great way to ease an introverted child into a small group setting. Many places offer group classes.


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## 34me (Oct 2, 2006)

My introvert loves pottery classes.


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## olliepop (Jun 26, 2007)

Quote:

I think a lot of people in our extraverted society believe that introversion can be lessened or should be fixed. In my opinion, it's a strength to be able be happily alone.

I'm not really looking to fix her, just make her feel more comfortable in certain situations.

Quote:

He is *very* introverted but he is not shy at all.
My dd is very shy as well. She will not speak to adults, peers, or friends unless she has known them for a long time. We are working on waving right now.

Dance or art class might be good fits for her b/c she does participate and perform with friends. Drama class might be too much for her right now, at least at this age.

Thanks for the advice.


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## BeanyMama (Jul 25, 2006)

something like painting, music, pottery, drama where doesn't have to be totally out there like in sports.


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## nancy926 (Mar 10, 2003)

Karate, swimming and gymnastics have all worked for my DD. I'd love to enroll her in some sort of laidback drama class....


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