# How do you respond to "I'm bored"?



## newmommy (Sep 15, 2003)

This is DS's favorite phrase lately. And this is AFTER he's had hours of play with 2 of his closest friends (3 solid hours yesterday).

DS had a good time playing with them...we left friends' house and got home about 7:30pm...the first thing out of his mouth was "I'm bored"









How do you respond?

Suggestions please!!


----------



## LilyGrace (Jun 10, 2007)

I know families who have kept an "I'm bored" jar full of slips of paper with different activities on them.

Me? I say, "Ok, what do you plan to do about it?" or if persists - "You can do X or do Y. Pick one"


----------



## newmommy (Sep 15, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *LilyGrace* 
Me? I say, "Ok, what do you plan to do about it?" or if persists - "You can do X or do Y. Pick one"


Thanks! What would your X or Y be?


----------



## nonconformnmom (May 24, 2005)

I give them a laundry list of chores.

"Hey! You could clean up your room! .... Pick up your toys? ... Weed the flower bed! .... Put the clean dishes away ..."

If they persist, I'll sometimes say, "I'm not your entertainment committee. You figure out what you want to do."


----------



## NaomiMcC (Mar 22, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *nonconformnmom* 
I give them a laundry list of chores.

"Hey! You could clean up your room! .... Pick up your toys? ... Weed the flower bed! .... Put the clean dishes away ..."

If they persist, I'll sometimes say, "I'm not your entertainment committee. You figure out what you want to do."

And it's amazing how fast they find other things to do, isn't it ?


----------



## phathui5 (Jan 8, 2002)

I suggest chores too.

"You're bored? That's great! You can clean the playroom, then straighten up the shoe pile..."


----------



## woobysma (Apr 20, 2004)

Yep, offering to let them help me with whatever I'm doing usually solves any boredom issues









wanna help me sort socks?










wanna help me write an essay on the elsticity of the long-term supply of peaches and how it affects prices of said peaches?

wanna help me scrape unidentified gunk off the kitchen baseboards ?









wanna give the dog a bath?









wanna finish this spreadsheet and revenue forecast and send it to the office ?









I do try to limit the amount of "alone time" we have during the day, breaking it up into smaller chunks helps everyone, me included.


----------



## woobysma (Apr 20, 2004)

weird - my very first double post


----------



## Subliime (Mar 24, 2007)

I agree w/ pps.

When I was younger and we complained about being bored, my aunt would say "oh, well I have something you can do. The toilets really need to be cleaned and then, x, y, and z needs to be done." We RARELY ever said we were bored b/c we had learned how to entertain ourselves. I wish I had the imagination that I had back then!! I know most kids these days who are stuck in front of the TV and video games can't even fathom the things we used to do as kids! We certainly weren't allowed to play video games and watch TV all day!


----------



## Sharlla (Jul 14, 2005)

Then clean your room


----------



## gradmama (Sep 2, 2007)

OMG, I hat this more than anything! There's always stacking rocks, washig floor s (with no mops!), reading (if they don't like to read), um....weeding the gardens, etc...... I think its a stage. My 12 yr old is always bored!


----------



## lalaland42 (Mar 12, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Sharlla* 
Then clean your room









My dad used to say that to me. It annoyed the crap out of me.


----------



## oceanbaby (Nov 19, 2001)

I don't usually respond to "I'm bored," other than to say something like "Oh yeah? I'm hungry." When I do respond it's something along the lines of "You've got a house full of toys and books, and a backyard to play in. I'm sure you can figure something out."

I had a woman tell me once that she responds by saying "You are?!?!?!! That's so exciting! You are going to discover the most amazing things by being bored!" And then she walks away.


----------



## newmommy (Sep 15, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *oceanbaby* 
I had a woman tell me once that she responds by saying "You are?!?!?!! That's so exciting! You are going to discover the most amazing things by being bored!" And then she walks away.


----------



## 4Marmalade (May 4, 2004)

My almost 5 year old ds said this to me yesterday. We spent a fairly quiet day at home playing a few things, doing a few chores, etc.... At the end of the day ds said "well, today sure was a boring day". I replied with "really, I found it pretty relaxing". He said "no, it was boring" so I countered with "well, there's only one person in charge of how boring a day you're going to have". He said "yah.....you!"







. I quickly corrected him.


----------



## Houdini (Jul 14, 2004)

I always tell them they are welcome to clean the toilets then.....they always find something to do at that point.....never have had to follow through on that one.


----------



## Sharlla (Jul 14, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lalaland42* 
My dad used to say that to me. It annoyed the crap out of me.

LOL i know


----------



## funkygranolamama (Aug 10, 2005)

I'm big on chore reccomendations, also. In fact, dd has gotten so used to that, I'll catch her saying "Moooooommmmmm, I'm bo...lingleheimerslack (or some gibberish, just as long as it's not "bored"). I'll say "What did you say?", her reply, "nothing......".


----------



## J-Max (Sep 25, 2003)

My first response is usually, "what kind....2X4, 4X6, pine, spruce, ect). This usually gets a laugh or an eyeroll. I try to give a couple of options of things to do, and if those are still boring, I start listing chores. They get un-bored real fast


----------



## ABand3 (May 21, 2005)

"Hi, Bored, nice to meet you! My name is mom, how can I help you?"

Amd if that doesn't end it, "clean the bathroom or play outside/in your room"


----------



## Storm Bride (Mar 2, 2005)

DD almost never does this, but on the few occasions that we've heard it, usually in the form of "I don't have anything to do", I ask her what she wants to do and make some suggestions. If nothing seems to click for her, I'll suggest picking up her toys or I'll sit down with her and read her a book...sometimes, it just means she wants some time with me.

Now, if ds1 (14) says, "I'm bored", he gets chore suggestions. He's fully capable of thinking up ways to occupy his time, and has lots of possible activities (drawing, juggling, practicing guitar, reading, going for a walk...whatever). He can figure out how to handle boredom himself.

It's a hard one for me to relate to. I don't think I've ever been bored since I learned to read.


----------



## fierymyst (May 27, 2006)

Responses to I'm bored:

"Hi, nice to meet you bored, I'm Mommy"

"Give them a list of chores like other posters have said"

"Get the I'm Bored list (a list of activities we made together for situations like this"

"Take a nap"

"I'm sorry to hear that"

Usually they wonder off....


----------



## luv my 2 sweeties (Aug 30, 2003)

Another mommy who suggests chores here!







I used to hate it when my mom did that, but now I know why she did. In the past when I've tried to help a "bored" dc come up with something to do, it's impossible. *Nothing* I suggest is acceptable and the whining only escalates. It quickly gets frustrating. So I learned my lesson and don't try to "fix" boredom anymore. They do a much better job of that if left to their own devices in my experience.


----------



## lilyka (Nov 20, 2001)

I usually respond "wow . . thats unfortunate. wanna help me out by cleaning your room/the bathroom/hauling laundry then maybe I will have some time to entertain you"


----------



## Quinalla (May 23, 2005)

The chore suggestion is a good one, can I use that on DH







:

Depending on the age/personality of the child, I would be willing to help them brainstorm some ideas or give suggestions, but I think letting them figure it out on their own is a good idea.


----------



## AngieB (Oct 25, 2003)

I say..... well, the dishwasher needs to be unlaoded, the bathroom needs to be cleaned, there is some laundry to fold and you still have homework to do. Suddenly they are no longer bored. It's a miracle!!!!!


----------



## GooeyRN (Apr 24, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lalaland42* 
My dad used to say that to me. It annoyed the crap out of me.

Me too.














hat I mean by being bored, was I wanted some attention or something to do WITH the company of a parent. No to be in solitary cleaning my room.


----------



## swampangel (Feb 10, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *GooeyRN* 
Me too.














hat I mean by being bored, was I wanted some attention or something to do WITH the company of a parent. No to be in solitary cleaning my room.

Exactly. This is the deal with my 4 1/2 yo ds. The issue becomes how do you encourage a child to use their own imagination and creativity to occupy themselves? My son can do this quite well, but often he'll come to me and say "what do you want to do with me?" which is very sweet but exhausting. He does the "I'm bored" thing sometimes, but I think it just means "I'm tired of playing by myself and I want to play with someone".

But I like the idea very much of encouraging them to be self-sufficient in entertaining themselves...it's a very valuable and pleasurable skill. I used to play for hours in my room pretending I was a teacher or a superhero.

How do you balance both of those things??


----------



## luv my 2 sweeties (Aug 30, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *swampangel* 
The issue becomes how do you encourage a child to use their own imagination and creativity to occupy themselves? ... How do you balance both of those things??

I'm sure it varies depending on the child, but in my kids' case, they are not hesitant to tell me if they want my attention. "Mommy, will you play a game with me?" or "I want to do something with you Mommy" are frequently heard requests.

"I'm bored" is a phrase I seldom hear, but when I do, I've discovered (through trial and error) that it does NOT usually mean that they want to spend quality time with me or that they can't entertain themselves. (They entertain themselves every day, so they and I both know they *can* do it.) It really does seem to mean that they are simply BORED -- saddled with that sense of ennui that we all get from time to time. My response -- suggesting chores -- is only partly in jest. When I get into such a mood, just jumping into _something_ is often enough to get me moving again. I may decide to leave off whatever task I chose at random and do something else more meaningful, but just _doing_ something is usually what it takes. Interestingly, I've had my ds take me up on helping with housework once or twice. He did a short task or two, then thought of something better to do.







Problem solved.

So I'm not being totally flippant when I suggest chores. I am a little bit, but there is a kernel of wisdom there. Plus, as I said before, my experience has been that "feeding" the bored child's sense of self-pity only makes it harder for them to pull out of it.

Keep in mind that my kids are 5 and 7, and many of the pp's may be dealing with older kids as well. I think the response for toddlers and young preschoolers can be different because what they are trying to communicate may be different.


----------

