# Is 13 too young to get a nose piercing?



## gradmama

ayi ayi

I don't have any moral objection. I'm not even sure what my objection would be. She asked months ago and I said something about getting 2 As and the rest Bs (trying to give incentive to work harder at school). I'm now regretting that sort of for a couple of reasons. One of them is that she actually got 3s (which in elementary school means at grade level so it could be Cs to As??). She thinks that qualifies. It is certainly better grades than she's ever had. But I don't think she'd really argue with me if I said no based on the grades.....

?? I don't know. 13?? I should have NEVER said anything about grades and I won't do that again. I did much better with the multiple ear piercings by just saying to wait until you're twelve and see if you still want it. Then sticking to the 12. My bad. I think I was trying to hold her over until like 15....that seemed more reasonable. But reasonable based on what? I have no moral objection....if how she is looked at by members of society who do have a moral objection bothers her, she can take it out.

Help.


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## PoppyMama

As long as my dd was old enough to take care of the piercing properly (like not mess with it) and it was something she had been wanting for a while (not just an impulsive idea) I would be OK with it. I have my nose pierced (but don't wear it at work) so take that into account.


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## Individuation

By all means let her. Cultural chauvinism is the only thing that makes it differ from pierced ears, in my view. People may tell you "Oooooh, as she grows it might heal weird! The piercing might MOVE!" which is the big scare. Honestly, that very rarely happens, isn't a big deal when it does, and can just as easily happen to the ears.

That said USE A REPUTABLE PIERCER. No guns, no nonsense like that.


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## ma_vie_en_rose

In our home, we have always made it clear that anything other than one hole in each ear is something they can decide at the age of 18 when they don't need parental permission to do it. That way there is nothing to negotiate. You may also want to look at her school dress code. Schools here do not allow peircings that are visible other than the ears.


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## Organicavocado

No. A reputable piercer will not pierce a minor with or without consent. I will not go to a shop that pierces minors. She rips that thing out somehow, snagged on a towel whatever (done it), and suddenly its your fault. Why not wait until she's old enough to sign for herself.. she can go to an excellent shop, research the piercing and how to care for it properly, and everybody rests easy.
I wanted my nose pierced when I was 15.. waited until I hit 18, signed for myself.. what a right of passage. I still have it.


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## sapientia

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Organicavocado* 
No. A reputable piercer will not pierce a minor with or without consent. I will not go to a shop that pierces minors. She rips that thing out somehow, snagged on a towel whatever (done it), and suddenly its your fault. Why not wait until she's old enough to sign for herself.. she can go to an excellent shop, research the piercing and how to care for it properly, and everybody rests easy.
I wanted my nose pierced when I was 15.. waited until I hit 18, signed for myself.. what a right of passage. I still have it.

I agree. I was 18 when I got mine. I tend to be pretty open but I'd make my own daughters wait till at least 16...little more responsible, I think.


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## Phantaja

I got my first tattoo at twelve or thirteen and I love it to death even now. At least a nose piercing could be removed if she (or you!) wanted it out.

But if you really don't want her to, she's your kid and you don't have to offer any reasons at all.


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## Individuation

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Organicavocado* 
No. A reputable piercer will not pierce a minor with or without consent.

This is untrue, but you may need to bring her ID and birth certificate, and you might want to find someplace patronized by South Asians. If you are in a lily-white area where piercings other than in the ears are Teh Rebellion, then the PP is probably right.


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## darkviolets

my 2 cents; it depends on the individual child, her maturity level, amount of responsibility she can handle. Age isn't the only important factor. I know 25 yr olds who are way more immature than some 13 yr olds..

If I felt she was responsible enough to care for it on her own, and it wasn't an impulsive thing or something she wanted "cause everyone else has one!!!" I would let her get it done. And provided it wasn't against the dress code at her school. Though you could get it done over the summer and she could just wear a spacer at school.


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## Arduinna

In many states it's against the law to pierce anything other than ears on anyone under 18. I'd check the law for your state before going any further.


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## wytchywoman

Check the laws and locate a resputable piercer, but in the end, if you think she is old enough to deal with keeping it clean and being responsible about it, then I would let her. A nose piercing, IMO, is small potatoes compared to all ther other body mods that are out there. AFAIK, most piercers would require you to be present at the piercing because of her age.


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## AnessasNannyXoX

I live in CA and its against the law to pierce anything if theyre under 18 and without a parent. For my ears I had to have an adult with me and they had to sign a consent form.

anyways. . In my opinion I think you should wait. At least until High School.

I can't imagine seeing a 13 year old with a nose piercing.

Thats still real young to me.


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## MaShroom

I think 13 is pretty young for a nose piercing, but that's just me. I asked dd to wait until she was 16. Now that she is, she still needs my consent legally, but it won't look as weird to me now that she looks more like a grownup-if that makes any sense...


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## WC_hapamama

I would make sure that she understands the consequences of that type of piercing before you do anything.

There are consequences... as screwed up as it seems, there are people who think poorly of things like nose piercings, and it might affect her ability to get certain kinds of jobs later on down the road.

You might also want to check the dress code at her school. Some dress codes are pretty specific about no extreme hair, make up or jewelry.


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## PregnantMomma20

I wouldn't have a problem with it except for what will happen at school? How will she keep it covered as I know most schools ban piercings like that? I didn't read the whole thread so maybe this all ready got brought up?


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## mamato3cherubs

I voted yes.
As others have said, only you know her level of responsibly. she needs to be able to properly care for it, and care about it. kwim?

It can always be removed. It is not permanent for life like a tattoo.
but again, you should have a good conversation with her first IF you decide to let her. If not, you don't need a reason. you are her mom

AND most important!!!!!!!! Find a reputable, good piercer to do it. Make sure they only use high quality surgical steel jewelry. It wont be cheap, and shouldn't be. If the jewelry is 10 bucks, walk away. And make sure she is ready and acts like she cares to be attentive to the instructions for care. Many piercers out there have good websites as well that will give instructions, healing times, why NOT to use any cheap jewelry you can by at the mall, etc. (this doesn't mean its a good shop of course, i wouldn't make a decision based on that, just a good place for you both to look at info together before hand.)

and I know around here the age is 16 unless a parent is present, I do not understand judging a piercer by whether or not they will pierce a minor? everyone has the right to decide for themselves and their own children. Doesn't make them any less qualified to do the job just because you don't agree with the ethics--hmm


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## mamato3cherubs

Quote:


Originally Posted by *PregnantMomma20* 
I wouldn't have a problem with it except for what will happen at school? How will she keep it covered as I know most schools ban piercings like that? I didn't read the whole thread so maybe this all ready got brought up?

I personally wouldnt have my child attend a school that banned piercings


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## Individuation

Quote:


Originally Posted by *WC_hapamama* 
I would make sure that she understands the consequences of that type of piercing before you do anything.

There are consequences... as screwed up as it seems, there are people who think poorly of things like nose piercings, and it might affect her ability to get certain kinds of jobs later on down the road.

I live in NYC (where many residents, of not most, have moved in order to work specific jobs), and I've never run across this sort of attitude to the small nose piercing that so many middle-aged women have. Never. Could you give me an example of a job that might not hire a qualified woman because she's chosen to wear unobtrusive, traditional jewelry?


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## Individuation

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mamato3cherubs* 
I personally wouldnt have my child attend a school that banned piercings

I would. If they banned all piercing. Jesus, Mary and Joseph, every time the piercing-an-infants-ears issue comes up, someone gets bent out of shape about how since for certain groups it's "cultural," it can't be argued with. Nose piercings on women are an important part of several cultures. How is this any different (aside from not being perpetrated on a helpless, screaming newborn)?

There is not one thing to differentiate ear piercing from nose piercing save bigotry. Sorry.


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## mtiger

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Individuation* 
I live in NYC (where many residents, of not most, have moved in order to work specific jobs), and I've never run across this sort of attitude to the small nose piercing that so many middle-aged women have. Never. Could you give me an example of a job that might not hire a qualified woman because she's chosen to wear unobtrusive, traditional jewelry?

Many/most retail establishments (apart from Hot Topic, etc) don't allow more than two piercings per ear when at work.


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## onyxravnos

as others i'm sure have said take her to a real piercer NOT anywhere where they use a gun! _*very very important*_


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## WC_hapamama

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Individuation* 
I live in NYC (where many residents, of not most, have moved in order to work specific jobs), and I've never run across this sort of attitude to the small nose piercing that so many middle-aged women have. Never. Could you give me an example of a job that might not hire a qualified woman because she's chosen to wear unobtrusive, traditional jewelry?

Disney for one. Their theme parks have some pretty strict dress codes for employees. Disney is notorious for their ticky-tacky rules about piercings, hair and facial hair.

I've never seen a school dress code that bans piercings outright, but have seen quite a few that have quite specific rules that require students to remove jewelry from certain piercings while they are at school. Part of that is a safety issue though.


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## mtiger

Six Flags, too.


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## ShadowMoon

I had my first piercing at 16 (with parental consent) and it was my naval. Laws are different state by state. Piercings can always be removed and a nose ring when cared for properly will only leave a tiny hole. Make sure she knows how to clean it and also make sure it is done by a reputable source.


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## ashcav

I was 14 or 15 when I got my nose pierced, 15 I think, and I went to one of the best places in my area, just needed my mom with me and my birth certificate. It can be a pain to take care of, so I would make sure you think she can do that before you consider it, but overall I'd say yes. Plus it is such a tiny hole if she decides she doesn't want it, when I took mine out you couldn't tell I even had it pierced ever.

Oh, and for my job which it wasn't allowed at, I just took it out for the hours I was working and it was fine.


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## maiaminna

I would be concerned it might be an impulsive thing she would regret later (and piercings do not always heal well when taken out, either). However, she's your child and you can judge that better.


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## Ruthla

Certainly check local laws- but assuming it's legal, I'd still tread cautiously. I'd learn a lot about proper care of the piercing, and make sure she's aware of possible complications, the amount of pain/discomfort that's common even without complications, etc.

I'd also make sure she REALLY wants it done, and it's not just a passing fad. I'd wait at least 6 months from the first time she asked about it until allowing it.

If it's legal in your state, and she's been asking for a long time and hasn't changed her mind, then I'd probably allow it. I'm not 100% sure how I'd react though, as none of my kids have requested "unconventional" piercings.


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## 2cutiekitties

I would have used the "if you still really want one in one year, then we will do it and make a nice day of it, do it the right way, etc. etc.

I personally dont think grades should ever be an incentive for anything, except because it is their job, college options, etc.


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## rightkindofme

If she is responsible enough to care for it, it's her body.


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## ziggy

I know in the four states I've lived in it's really difficult to find a certified piercer who will pierce somebody under 18. If they are willing to break that law, you don't know what other "short cuts" they will take. I was over 18 when I got all my piercings and tattoos.


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## mamato3cherubs

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Individuation* 
I would. If they banned all piercing. Jesus, Mary and Joseph, every time the piercing-an-infants-ears issue comes up, someone gets bent out of shape about how since for certain groups it's "cultural," it can't be argued with. Nose piercings on women are an important part of several cultures. How is this any different (aside from not being perpetrated on a helpless, screaming newborn)?

There is not one thing to differentiate ear piercing from nose piercing save bigotry. Sorry.

Was this post in response to my comment about not sending my kids to a school that banned piercings? I just didnt understand what you were saying here thats all.

I just stated my feelings on the school thing because so many mentioned them being banned. I would never have thought of that as there is no problem with any piercings at any of the schools in this area, so I was suprised to see so many do.

Oh and just because, I dont see any difference between the ears and any other piercing either. But I am one of those who had my infant daughters ears pierced, and no, she didnt even cry. Barely woke up.

Guess I have several years before Im faced with this situation as my oldest has no interest in anything of the sort. I have a feeling my daughter will prove to be different!


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## guest^

I voted yes.
But.....that would only be if .....
1) She gets it done by a VERY reputable piercer. Sterile and law-abiding.

2) She is responsible enough to take EXCELLENT care of her piercing.

If I remember correctly, tiny nose piercings close easily, w/o notice?

Personally, I prefer conservative piercings over tatoos and immodest dressing for teens.JMHO.









mp


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## anne1140

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Individuation* 
I live in NYC (where many residents, of not most, have moved in order to work specific jobs), and I've never run across this sort of attitude to the small nose piercing that so many middle-aged women have. Never. Could you give me an example of a job that might not hire a qualified woman because she's chosen to wear unobtrusive, traditional jewelry?

If you're applying to be a teacher, there is a high chance they will not hire you if you have a nose piercing. I am a teacher and used to have my nose pierced. I would like to do it again, but if I did, I'm sure I would get into trouble for it.


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## wytchywoman

Quote:


Originally Posted by *anne1140* 
If you're applying to be a teacher, there is a high chance they will not hire you if you have a nose piercing. I am a teacher and used to have my nose pierced. I would like to do it again, but if I did, I'm sure I would get into trouble for it.

I am guessing that depends on the state. I am a TA in AZ and I have a nose piercings, several other TA's have nose piercings and two of the teachers in our section, one of which I work for, has nose piercings. I think it depends on the district and the state. In the end, after the piercing is healed, it can be removed daily for a period of time if need be.


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## treemom2

DH and I have discussed this at length and have decided that we will allow our children to get one (or two of it's ears) nonsexual piercing at 13 if they have the maturity to care for it and if we can find a reputable piercer to do it.

About the teacher job thing, my DH has worked in three states (NC, UT, and NV) and never had a problem with his piercings. He now works for DODDs as a teacher and they also have no problem with his gaged ears. . .his supervisor also has piercings at the district level. However, once as a "fun" part time job I applied in the natural foods section at Fred Meyer and was turned down because my nose was pierced (but the butcher was covered in tattoos and hickeys all over her neck--made no sense to me at all, but that's another post)


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## fork

I really don't understand the people who are saying that one's future carrier has anything to do with piercings the kids get now. If they really want to work somewhere that doesn't allow it, it can be removed. I fail to see what the problem is. Sure they leave a small scar, but the scars from all of my facial piercings are barely noticeable, and the big scar from when one got torn isn't even that big of a deal. I would let her, if she is capable of taking care of it. Even if it is an impulsive thing, it can be removed later. I suppose if you have issues about tiny scars than it seems more "permanent", but I don't think it's a big deal.


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## Pancakes

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Organicavocado* 
No. A reputable piercer will not pierce a minor with or without consent. I will not go to a shop that pierces minors.

I completely agree. My piercer wouldn't even pierce my then 10 y/o daughter's ears. (first hole, not multiple) He said that he understood my desire to use him instead of some place in the mall with a gun, but if a piercer was willing to pierce a minor, run out of the shop screaming.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Individuation* 
I live in NYC (where many residents, of not most, have moved in order to work specific jobs), and I've never run across this sort of attitude to the small nose piercing that so many middle-aged women have. Never. Could you give me an example of a job that might not hire a qualified woman because she's chosen to wear unobtrusive, traditional jewelry?


There are more employers that will not hire someone with facial piercings than there are that will. I think by you being in NYC you might have a more lenient environment.

I would definitely allow my child to pierce their nose. No one would do it, but I'd allow it. DH...that's a completely different story. I've wanted mine pierced for 15 years and he's always asked me not to. Damn it for respecting his opinion.


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## PoppyMama

I strongly disagree the statement that no reputable piercer will pierce under 18 even with parental consent. My husband is a piercer and is very conscious of safety and legality. He will pierce a minor if the parent gets a notarized signed release form. Now, he wouldn't do a nipple or genital piercing on someone under 18 no matter what their parents said.


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## vegemamato

_I_ pierced my septum when I was fourteen.. (think alone, in the bathroom, safety pin, ow ow ow.)

and look at me!! I'm fine









anyway, what I'm saying is that I wouldn't mind my kids getting pierced at the grand old age of thirteen. like a pp said, she could take it out if *she* decides it isn't working.

good luck !!!


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## ziggy

Poppymama, in many states, including California which is where my perspective is from, it IS true that no reputable piercer will pierce a minor, under any circumstance. Other states may vary, and many people said that.


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## cranberriesfor5

I would just make sure it was something she wanted for HER and not to make her cooler, kwim?

I really do not know how I would feel about my son asking me at 13 if he could get a piercing.


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## dziwozony

i think you should help her get it done. take her to a GOOD piercing salon (preferably one that focuses just on body piercing)...one that doesn't use a gun & doesn't mind answering all of your questions.

i have a 13 (nearly 14) year old sister & just found out through her myspace page that she pierced her own lip- yikes! she then took it out almost immediately, which you should never do (traps potential infection, better to let it heal with jewelry in). so i'm telling her all these things & she knew none of them. i hope it doesn't get infected.

but when i was her age i wanted the same done with my belly button. tried to do it myself, but wimped out with the pain. i confessed to my parents what i was trying to do & when i was 15 they agreed to take me to do it. i think that was really cool of them!


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## smillerhouse

Yes, I think it is. I did let my dd,mnow 15 get multiple ear piercings and a navel piercing. They did not last long. Ithink self-expression is the key and there are a lot of other ways: she dyes her hair frequently, clothes, voice, sports,etc. Today, I tell her at age 18, I am not signing anymore releases. Also, I do not beleive young teens see the future. Piercings are not acceptable in mainstream academic,sports, and buisness realms. Basically now I say, you can get temporay tatoos, dye hair and channel energy in fun ways. Sallie


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## Greenmama2AJ

I voted yes.

A small nose peircing is one of the least obtrusive peircings, rarely rejects or scars.

I've seen eyebrown, nipple and bellybutton pericings rejected.

My own parents were pretty liberal and my alternative-loving (and completely geeky) sister was heavily peirced - 3 tongue rings (yes, 3!!), a nose ring, a labrette, naval ring and those huge expander earrings in highschool. It is legal for minors to get peirced here.
She is now 24 and her wild peircing days are long over. She took them all out when she "grew up" and the only ones that scarred were the wide earrings and belly ring.

Peircings aren't forever. I dont have a single peircing but I was much more rebellious in other ways. I wonder if allowing a little bit of controlled rebellion now is better than fighting a power struggle later, it worked for my parents.


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## Individuation

Quote:


Originally Posted by *anne1140* 
If you're applying to be a teacher, there is a high chance they will not hire you if you have a nose piercing. I am a teacher and used to have my nose pierced. I would like to do it again, but if I did, I'm sure I would get into trouble for it.

I was a teacher's aide in NYC for some time, and that would not seem to be true from what I experienced. Eyebrows and labrets and the like, yes. Small nose piercings, no. But again, it could easily be removed during working hours.

Off-topic, but I was told to cover my wrist tattoos while working in Bronx schools, and I was really surprised (not offended, just surprised). I was told that many of the parents in our district identified the tattoos I had (hand-done single-needle, on the wrists) with gangs, and that it might bother them. That made perfect sense to me, and I did long-sleeves, wide embroidered-ribbon bracelets, or tattoo makeup.

These things are not insurmountable.


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## Individuation

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Pancakes* 
There are more employers that will not hire someone with facial piercings than there are that will. I think by you being in NYC you might have a more lenient environment.

I'm also in one of the career centers of the world, so if it's fine with NYC employers I'm not going to cry into my beer that my child might not get hired at the Orange Julius in Terre Haute or something.

I mean, sure. Low-status and menial jobs (many of which I've had; I'm not making classist statements here, just being factual) do often dictate things about appearance; uniforms, hairstyle, etc. We'll all take our piercings out and wear the stupid smock if we're working at Walmart.

Somehow inferring from this that they are "unacceptable" is both strange and, I'd imagine, quite funny to the many middle-aged, conservative Indian women with nose piercings AND PhDs that I've run across.

Rather than worry about an innocuous piercing, why not raise your children with the skillset to enable them to write their own ticket? There seem to be some very low expectations on this thread.


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## Marsupialmom

If she just asked for it the first ime I would make her wait 6 mnths to think about it and to make sure it isn't a passing phase. A nose peircing I wouldn't give a flat out no wait until you are 18 to do. I would take in some concideration like how responcible the 13 year old is.

But I would also talk about how OTHER people will see it. Some jobs don't allow it. Teachers might look down on her. Reliatives, et.

I would make her find out risk and how to prevent infections (in other words care).

I would make to go to a professional piercer.


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## Marsupialmom

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Individuation* 
I'm also in one of the career centers of the world, so if it's fine with NYC employers I'm not going to cry into my beer that my child might not get hired at the Orange Julius in Terre Haute or something.

I mean, sure. Low-status and menial jobs (many of which I've had; I'm not making classist statements here, just being factual) do often dictate things about appearance; uniforms, hairstyle, etc. We'll all take our piercings out and wear the stupid smock if we're working at Walmart.

Somehow inferring from this that they are "unacceptable" is both strange and, I'd imagine, quite funny to the many middle-aged, conservative Indian women with nose piercings AND PhDs that I've run across.

Rather than worry about an innocuous piercing, why not raise your children with the skillset to enable them to write their own ticket? There seem to be some very low expectations on this thread.


I work in corporate America and I do see appearance being an issue. Not necessarily a dress code but people look and notice. Also there is a difference from an Indian woman having a noise piercing than a white/AA having one. There is a cultural/ethnic difference. There are many cultural/ethinic/religous differences that are accepted and overlooked but even at that there are certain standards that are expected.

One thing I have seen is young adults not understanding the dress code of Corporate America....and if you don't own the business you have to understand the dress/apperience expectations.

Company's wether it is low level hire or a $100,000 want their employees to project an image and if you are getting paid by them then that is part of your job.

Many jobs would not find the nose piercing acceptable unless their is an Indian/Asian ethnic background for it.


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## Individuation

]I work in corporate America and I do see appearance being an issue. Not necessarily a dress code but people look and notice. Also there is a difference from an Indian woman having a noise piercing than a white/AA having one. There is a cultural/ethnic difference. There are many cultural/ethinic/religous differences that are accepted and overlooked but even at that there are certain standards that are expected.

*I think that that's true, but I also think that very few human resources people are going to open the can of worms needed to judge whether someone has a right to certain cultural expressions (I am thinking of a situation where a "white" employee was told only AA employees could have dreadlocks and...oops! Turns out she was a light-complected AA woman and boy was she pissed off! Add to that the fact that several white cultures and at least one African culture do practice nose piercing, and yeah... big potential for trouble. In today's America? Not seeing it.*

One thing I have seen is young adults not understanding the dress code of Corporate America....and if you don't own the business you have to understand the dress/apperience expectations.

*Absolutely. But here I think you are talking about something different. I am presuming in this case that the individual in question is a qualified, erudite, cultured person who understands appropriate dress and bearing and, perhaps, has a small piece of jewelry in the nose, rather than two in the ears. Personally, in that case, I think they look both dignified and stately. But yes yes yes, let's teach the children that they can't go to interview at a corporate law firm in flip-flops.*

Company's wether it is low level hire or a $100,000 want their employees to project an image and if you are getting paid by them then that is part of your job.

*Certainly. It seems to me you've only really seen nose piercings on Hot Topic kids, and therefore are basing your ideas of their "image" on a very narrow idea of what they look like.*

Many jobs would not find the nose piercing acceptable unless their is an Indian/Asian ethnic background for it.

Again, I cannot imagine someone willingly wading into _that_ particular deep water. My goodness. Will there be blood checks, too?

Sorry to be facetious, but I think that on MDC we sometimes talk theoretically about "cultural appropriation" and forget that in the real world it's not always easy to judge such things.


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## Narn

No. They are cute. They can also be taken out.

I don't see a nose piercing as any different than an ear piercing.


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## barbara73069

I don't have a problem with piercings at all, I think they look great. I don't think 13 is too young.


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## fork

Why does everyone keep bringing up the job issue? Piercings are REMOVEABLE. When she turns 16 and wants to work at the bookstore that won't allow it, she can take it out, or even use a retainer. When she's an adult and wants to be a CEO or a teacher or something, she can REMOVE it.

Some people act like she wants to get a tattoo on her face or something.


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## GradysMom

Cartilige peircing can actually come with serious infections for one thing. Secondly Personally I would insist on not allowing it to help dc understand how important it is to respect the body as it is made... for me this comes from "body as temple" thinking and is why I'm currently antivax and an intactivist.

I understand the freedom, indepence needs but I think nose peircing is a mature peircing, it has intellectual and alluring qualities but like heels on a two year old it doesn't suit a 13 yr old.

MHO


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## ldsmom06

We won't let dd even get her ears pierced until 13(at least) So no way on a nose ring that young IMO.

BTW: I have a nose ring and got it when I was in college along with 2 tattoos and a nipple and eyebrow piercing. I wear none of my piercings anymore. You can still see all my piercings even though I stoped wearing them 3+ years ago.


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## chiromamma

I had 13yo DD wait until she got her first period or Bat Mitzvah for ears. She got the period first. Now she wants her nose pierced...one of those teeney little gems. I think they are beautiful. We'll do it right after the Bat Mitzvah. We chose these times simply as a way to mark her entrance into adulthood both physically and in her community.
Lips...no way, eyebrows uh-uh. All the wierd ear stretching and stuff...nope. The small ear and nose piercings are easy enough to change your mind about, the other ones aren't. No tats while a minor either.


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## Kirsten

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ma_vie_en_rose* 
In our home, we have always made it clear that anything other than one hole in each ear is something they can decide at the age of 18 when they don't need parental permission to do it. That way there is nothing to negotiate.

Here too. They can rebel/show their maturity or individualism with clothing and hair and music and the like, but no piercings or tattoos until they are adults. It just isn't an option for us the way we feel currently. And the one hole in each ear/traditional ear piercing is allowed when they are 12.

Our dd1 just had hers done recently, and has had so many issues with most earrings that there have been tears and visits to the ped for help. She told me she is SO glad that I didn't let her get them pierced when she was younger, and at times has said she wishes she hadn't done them at all. I think she is happy with them now that we've found some more earrings she can wear.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Individuation* 
Could you give me an example of a job that might not hire a qualified woman because she's chosen to wear unobtrusive, traditional jewelry?

Depending on where you live, nose rings aren't considered traditional jewelry. Although they aren't as alternative as they were 10 years ago, they are certainly not traditional where I live, and I consider this area fairly liberal.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ldsmom06* 
You can still see all my piercings even though I stoped wearing them 3+ years ago.

Same here. I had my ears pierced when I was 12 or 13. I didn't wear earrings enough and they grew back. The holes showed for 5 years, though I couldn't get earrings through. In college, I had them repierced in the same spot. Same thing happened with not wearing earrings enough, and those holes showed for SEVENTEEN years until I just recently had them repierced (same spot - third time).

OP, in your original post you sound unsure. You are the parent; you don't need to convince your child. I think it is fair to give the reasons you are saying no, but no is no. She will be mad and/or disappointed, but will get over it.

Regardless, I wouldn't tie that decision to grades. And in my girls' school, at grade level is a C.


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## Kathryn B

I know very few adults who like the same things now that they did at 13. Unlike a hairstyle, tattoos or piercings are not easy to change when we grow out of them or the novelty wears off.


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## Cherry Alive

Quote:


Originally Posted by *GradysMom* 
Cartilige peircing can actually come with serious infections for one thing.

Not if they are done right. My sister had her ears pierced in the lobes by a doctor when she was about 10. He used a gun. The ear holes eventually stretched out-almost all the way through the ear. She has a nice scar left from it.

She later had her navel and the tops of her ears pierced (in the cartilage), because she can never wear regular earrings. It was all done by a professional piercer. While her navel does occasionally get infections, the tops of her ears never have had infections. She keeps her hair short and away from the holes. I suspect it may be even less of an issue for the nose as nothing would be touching the nose-ring (except the pierced skin).


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## MusicianDad

It depends. If she's mature enough to care for the piercing then I see no reason why a 13 yo can't have her nose done. Around here piercings aren't a big deal. Maybe it's just the area though... "You know your from Vancouver when your third grader goes to school with someone who has purple hair and a nose ring... and it's the teacher."

A nose piercing is pretty unobtrusive as some have said earlier. My good friend has a stud in her nose and last year someone she saw at least twice a week commented on it. Then asked when she got it. When she said 2000, he was surprised because he'd never noticed before and she never takes it out even for work.

Also mentioned above. Make sure you check out the place that does the piercings, no guns and following saftey proceedures. Some doctors might be willing to do it, but you can get piercing stores that follow the rules just as strictly. I was also told once that a place that doesn't use a topical anisthetic is best. If my dd asked for a piercing there are only a few I wouldn't agree too and I all ready know where we'd take her.

Red, my friend developed a small infection a few weeks after she got her nose piercing, but it was easy to clear up with regular cleaning and soaking in hot water.


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## mommyto3girls

Quote:


Originally Posted by *anne1140* 
If you're applying to be a teacher, there is a high chance they will not hire you if you have a nose piercing. I am a teacher and used to have my nose pierced. I would like to do it again, but if I did, I'm sure I would get into trouble for it.

In trouble for it even though you are already hired? Wow, i teach and I can see how it could affect your being hired (lots of applicants so they are going to weed people by whatever they can) but to get in trouble for it when you already work there?


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## maliceinwonderland

I would definitely allow it, unless she's not at the same maturity level of most kids her age and wouldn't take care of it properly. I know my sister's daughter had hers done at 13, and two lip rings and took care of all of them perfectly (probably was better than I was with mine at 21







) I think at 13 kids are old enough to make choices about piercings. It's not permanent like a tattoo and it doesn't leave a huge mark. And besides, even piercing your ears leaves a little mark, so what's the difference between that and a nose/lip piercing?


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## Emzachsmama

I voted 'other' just because of the wording of the poll question. If the question had been 'Would you let YOUR daughter get her nose pierced at 13 yrs old?' I would have voted 'no'. But I don't know what you should do for your dd because every parent will have a different opinion about what is ok.

We have told our dd that we will not give our permission for any piercings other than her ears so if she wants them, she needs to wait until she doesn't need parental permission. We just really feel that anything like that needs to be purely her decision and to us that means being at the age that parental permission is no longer required.


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## BathrobeGoddess

There was a great article in Mothering a few years ago about a mother allowing her daughter to get her navel pierced and the process the mom faced in coming to that conclusion. I'll see if I can dig it up online. It is really worth the read!

I would allow it if I felt like my dd could handle it. She is 13 now and I don't think she could do it at this point. Here, most everyone I know takes their kids to get their ears done at a professional shop that is very well know for their professionalism and cleanliness. Some piercers do it some don't because they are uncomfortable with children. I think that is fair!

I have my nose pierced and I am a teacher (both kids and college level) and I have never been asked about, asked to remove it, or even had anyone say anything about it.
It must district to district...


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## HisBeautifulWife

I wouldn't allow it at that age and only because I believe kids are being pressured/brain washed into thinking they are adults at younger and younger ages. We need to stop allowing these kids to grow up so fast.

I guess I have some "old school grandma" in me.


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## FunkSoulMommy

I would say that as long as she knows the commitment required to properly take care of it and is fully aware of the negative things that can happen because of it then it is her body. That being said, I am all for looking at pictures of infected piercings and things like that online before she does it. Personally I have had 2 liprings a nose ring a vertical labret and a nipple ring and have had them all done in very clean and safe places. Even with that precaution I ended up with a bacterial infection that entered my bloodstream after getting my 2nd lip ring. It had nothing to do with the place that did it, it was most likely caused by unsanitary conditions in a resteraunt I ate in after geting it. Infections can happen no matter how careful she is and she should know the possible outcomes....

Oh & for what its worth you can't tell I had my nosering at all.

for the oposite viewpoint my hubby thinks I'm a crazy piercing loving freak and in his exact words "a 12 year old is stupid and you are responsible for a 12 year old because it is stupid" He's not quite as open to accepting children as capable humans as I am...


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## journeymom

I wouldn't let my 13 y.o. get her nose pierced. She's asked, just because she was curious, and I said I have no problem with it all when she's 18 and she's on her own. I even think they're pretty. But not until she's an adult and can make that decision on her own. I prefer to be conservative when I make decisions for her.

And I'm open to changing my mind when she's older.


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## sebarnes

I think I'd be fine with a small nose piercing. Not through kind that goes between the nostrils, but the kind that goes on one side. I think they are kind of pretty. I would talk to her about all of the issues that go along with piercing, and I hope she doesn't choose to get one because our church counsels against any piercings other than one in each ear, but in the end, I think I would leave that one up to her, because, after all, there are a lot of worse things she could be doing







.


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## princesstutu

I voted wrong, so subtract one of those "no" votes and add a "yes" vote.









Furthermore, are we seriously using potential unemployment at amusement parks as reasons to not allow a nose piercing?









If you seriously don't think her grades are high enough, say no. If you think she held up to her end of the bargain or that you can't really argue how she hasn't, keep your word.

Your word is more important than a nose piercing, IMO.

Beyond that, I think 13 is a highly appropriate age to pierce one's nose. She's officially a teen and so I woulnd't have a problem with it, myself.

The most important things about this, IMO, are:

1. Take her to a good piercer, not a gun-user.
2. Say what you mean and mean what you say.


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## mamato3cherubs

I see alot of extreme here. interesting to me.
this is a nose piercing that i assume is not going to include anything large and flashy. I dont even notice them around town anymore. People of every profession in this area have them. retail, grocery, drs, nurses, teachers, i could go on. Now i do notice other facial piercings. It is not too uncommon to see a small ring on the lip, or eyebrow, but not nearly as often.

I am in a smaller conservative community too. I expected that we see less than many other places would.

And for what its worth, the nose piercing is one of the best to heal. Not fastest, as the tounge heals faster, but it is not one I would put extra worry into like a surface piercing. Many teens get thier navel pierced and it is much much longer and more difficult to heal.


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## treemom2

So, I'm just curious here. . .why is getting your ears pierced okay, but your nose not okay? They both take cleaning, they both hurt a bit when being done, they both should be done by a professional piercer, they both can get caught on towels or become infected, they are both putting holes in the body that might leave a little pretty much not noticable scar. . .so why is one okay and not the other??


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## Pancakes

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Individuation* 
I'm also in one of the career centers of the world, so if it's fine with NYC employers I'm not going to cry into my beer that my child might not get hired at the Orange Julius in Terre Haute or something.

I mean, sure. Low-status and menial jobs (many of which I've had; I'm not making classist statements here, just being factual) do often dictate things about appearance; uniforms, hairstyle, etc. We'll all take our piercings out and wear the stupid smock if we're working at Walmart.

Somehow inferring from this that they are "unacceptable" is both strange and, I'd imagine, quite funny to the many middle-aged, conservative Indian women with nose piercings AND PhDs that I've run across.

Rather than worry about an innocuous piercing, why not raise your children with the skillset to enable them to write their own ticket? There seem to be some very low expectations on this thread.

I believe that the "low-status and menial jobs" would be what a typical teenager just entering the workforce would be doing. Beyond that and in a more professional position, DH is in finance/banking and there is no way he would be employable if he had facial piercing and/or visible tattoos. Some types of employment require a very conservative and professional appearance.

You seem very defensive about the opinions in my post but seem to have missed this part.

Quote:

I would definitely allow my child to pierce their nose.
Hell! I have blue hair. LOL


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## Happiestever

I just wanted to add something: that at 13, kids are really into what everyone else has, and oftem one piercing leads to another.

I got my belly button, then my nose then my tongue and spent alot of money on the piercings, tattoo parlors and all the jewelry. So be prepared to pay through the nose- haha. I liked my jewelry to be 14k or match my clothes. But that's just me.

And for what it's worth, I miss my nose the most. And what to get it done again. Because like pp said some jobs don't like piercings. And I know I was turned down for jobs bc I had mine pierced. Although I usually worked at offices and the like( neat appearance required, with a lot of older people as clients)

I ended up taking mine out for another job and got lazy about putting it back in, because you have to twist it and everything into place. Unless you have a post, which in my opinion come out easily. Alas, I digress. Needless to say I was very into my body jewelry and ended up tossing my stash after all the holes were gone. Now the tattoos I have, a whole different story.

Aahh, to be 13. I would probably ask her to wait until she can pay for everything herself.


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## FancyD

I said no. It's her nose, and at that age she's ready to start making decisions like that. I would not let a 13 year-old get a tattoo, but that's permanent. A nose piercing closes up.


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## SheepNumber97245

This is tough. I said no and i'm not even happy with that, because as a few people have said before, it's only because of society and no one would care if it were her ears.

But, 13 is such a unique age. It's right at the point where a young women is trying to figure out who she is and what she wants in life and i known that for me, my interests in fashion and appearance changed drastically from when i was 13 to when i turned 14. Yes nose pearcings heal but not without a scar and even the tiniest of scars can make a girl (or woman for that matter) self conscious. So i would say wait one more year at least.

Oh, and I forgot, the reason why this is really tough is if you say no she might then go to some shady piercer that doesn't require ID. When i was 16 i wanted my navel pieced but my parents wouldn't let me so I had it done by this guy who pierced a friend of mine and he did it in his car with me laying down in the seat. Everything was sterilized and the needle was new (i saw him take it out of the package) and he had gloves on but when he went to put it through he didn't do it fast enough, and pushed it like 4 or 5 times. It felt like he was digging in my skin. I even started to cry. It was aweful and even though i cleaned it well every day, about 3 months later it ended up getting this huge blister and i had to take it out. The scar is really ugly...


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## 1littlebit

honestly? i think if she can take care of it why not. i had a friend in highschool who did it and she ended up taking it out b/c everyone kept thinking it was a pimple.. not to mention stuff kept sticking to it. lol


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## graceshappymum

I said no, but I guess that would depend on the circumstances. We have freinds who's DD wanted a nose piercing when she was fourteen. They told her to wait for a year and if she still wanted it they would pay for it and have it done at a salon of thier choice (so that they knew that it was reputable). She has since decided that she doesn't really want one after all. I guess my reaction would be similar.


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## chiromamma

I'm curious about the advice against piercing guns. Is the advice the same for ears? When DD had her ears pierced (with a gun) we had so many problems.
Please explain. What type of piercing implement should I look for when having the side of her nose pierced?


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## eclipse

I said no, but I meant yes (I was answering the thread title instead of the poll question. I might not have been the only one to do that.)

Anyhow. . .it's her nose. Would you let her get her ears pierced? Is there a difference?


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## treemom2

Quote:


Originally Posted by *chiromamma* 
I'm curious about the advice against piercing guns. Is the advice the same for ears? When DD had her ears pierced (with a gun) we had so many problems.
Please explain. What type of piercing implement should I look for when having the side of her nose pierced?

The piercer who pierced my nose told me that guns damage tissues (guns take a blunt object and force it through the skin, whereas piercers use a very sharp needle) when you use them and they are way more likely to get infected. Here's more info I found online about it.

http://tattoo.about.com/cs/psafety/a/piercing_guns.htm

http://www.expertvillage.com/video/1...l-piercing.htm

http://www.querycat.com/faq/90a97470...c456e3bfc80049


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## mandib50

i didn't read the other replies so maybe i'm repeating something. i put no, i think that 13 is too young, i wouldn't let my dd get it done at 13. not sure why i think that though. that being said i'm taking my 15 yo dd to get her nose pierced so i don't have objections to piercings ...

if she is responsible and will take care of the piercing (mine took close to a year to heal properly), then i might consider it.


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## happyhats

I had a nose piercing and let it close it, merely because I lost the ring (had to take it out for work) and I just decided that was okay. There was no scarring, no problems at all with it closing, and when I wore my small nose ring nobody really noticed the majority of the time.

That said, my mom did make me wait even though I wanted one for years. I don't know that I would necessarily wait until she was eighteen, but I would wait to see if it isn't just a passing fancy. I'd also discuss with her that it needs to heal properly, and that she may not be able to wear it in school or, later on, in most jobs. I'd probably get it done in the summer so it has time to heal and then be able to be taken out. Honestly I think I'd be more apprehensive about other piercing that might permenantly alter her appearance or take longer to heal.


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## ananas

I dunno, 13 seems really really young to me for something like that. Maybe it's just me though.


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## caldo

I said no because where I live it is against the law to do body piercing (i.e. other than ears) on anyone younger than 16 years of age. So anyone who would do it here would be breaking the law. That and I just feel 13 is a little young. She has her whole life to get a piercing if she chooses later...

That being said, it's up to you as the parent to judge if she is responsible enough to get a piercing. I just got my navel pierced and there is a LOT of care that goes into preventing infection. And infections can be really dangerous. You don't want to have to nag her about it.


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## Twwly

As a former piercer, my answer is no to the nose ring. In my experience, no reputable shop will pierce minors (hello 'penetration of a minor' charge... pass on that one).

(1) There can be permanent marks left behind in the form of keloid or hypertrophic scarring.

(2) I thoroughly disagree though that there is a lot of care that needs to take place, it's a small wound and your chances of infection are incredibly slim to none (unless your level of personal hygiene is WELL below average and you get pierced with a gun or something else that has not been sterilized in an autoclave). I cannot begin to count the number of noses I've pierced over the years and while I can certainly count the # of keloids I've seen, I've not seen one genuine infection.

As a parent I would be more worried about the chance of scarring than infection (which rates a 0 for me on the scale of worry). As a parent my answer would remain NO because no reputable shop would do it. DC would have to wait until whatever the age of consent is at whatever the cleanest shop in town is, period.


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## tbone_kneegrabber

I voted YES!!!! I had my eyebrow pierced at 14 and my first tattoo at 15 (both at reputable clean shops, with my mom's presence) and this was 11-12 years ago.

I would way rather my kid get a piercing, which can always be taken out when they sell out and join corporate america (oh the tears I would shed!) than do the things I did at 13 (lose virginity etc)


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## Fyrestorm

I chose other!

I know several 13 YOs that are more than capable of 'getting' what they are doing and several that would be doing it for all the wrong reasons. I think it totally depends on the child.

I have no problem at all with the concept of a 13 YO getting any type of body modification that they want...as long as they have a true understanding of what they are doing.


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## jellybellyxoxo

If you think she can take care of a nose piercing, then I'd say let her have it. In my opinion, it's not about how old she is (errr, it kind of is), but it's more about how mature she is. My almost-13 year old daughter could get a nose piercing any time under my rules because of her maturity level. So I find it more of a maturity level type thing, rather then age. (I voted other)


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## KellyKA23

I voted yes but I ment it to be a no! I think 13 is way too young, and i have nothing against nose peircings at all, but any sort of bodypeircings I am against untill 18. I think at 13 if they are alloud to do it, it was with your permission and same with the consequences. At 18 whatever you do to your body you are accountable for taking care of, and also conforming with guidlines for your chosen career. I convinced my aunt at 16 to let me get my belly button periced, which was super awsome when i was 16 but now that im 24 and its been out for years im regretting still having a little hole there. Especially now that Im pregnant. At 18 I dont know if I even would have had the balls to do it and go on my own, but at 16 with my aunt there to give permission and to hold my hand it was no bigdeal.

So I would say wait. She is so young now and has plenty of time to grow up. Most people with them are 18 and you dont wanting her looking prematurly older than she is. Give her somthing to look forward to. At 13 I was fianlly aloud to get my second ear peircing holes.







And at 18 I made my own choices!

There were alot of things I liked and thought were cool while in highschool and younger but by 18,19,20 I realized that wasnt the image I wanted to give the world of myself. I would love to get my nose peirced and Im def. thinking of doing it... but Im 24..... Definitely give her somthing to look forward to.... because what will she want when she is 15 or 16 or 18?


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## mommy68

I think it's too young. I have a 13 yr old (boy) now and wouldn't allow it. But then again, he isn't the type that would want it.

At that young of an age things are done because of peer pressure and to be like other people. It's not done because it's something they have a huge inner desire to do. I was 13 once, I remember.


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## mommy68

Quote:


Originally Posted by *tbone_kneegrabber* 
I would way rather my kid get a piercing, which can always be taken out when they sell out and join corporate america (oh the tears I would shed!) than do the things I did at 13 (lose virginity etc)

but a lot of children DO have sex very early on these days and getting a nose ring is one thing that can be done to attract other people to them.









You can't possibly think that because you willingly go with your child and allow them to get a piercing or tattoo while they are still a child that it will keep them from wanting to have sex early. Give me a break. I wanted nothing to do with tattoos and didn't even have my ears pierced when I started having sex at the age of 14.







But then again, in the 80's only white trash did the piercings/tattoos where I came from. It's funny that all that mess is so widely accepted now. ick. I laugh sometimes at the thought of all the teens and kids in their 20's that will one day look back in ohhh about another twenty or thirty years and wonder why the h*ll did I do this to the one and only body I'll ever have.


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## tbone_kneegrabber

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mommy68* 
but a lot of children DO have sex very early on these days and getting a nose ring is one thing that can be done to attract other people to them.









You can't possibly think that because you willingly go with your child and allow them to get a piercing or tattoo while they are still a child that it will keep them from wanting to have sex early. Give me a break. I wanted nothing to do with tattoos and didn't even have my ears pierced when I started having sex at the age of 14.










I wasn't saying that going with them to get a piercing would keep them from having sex, what I am saying is that there are *worse* things than a nose ring, or things that you might dislike your child to do more than a nose ring.


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## karina5

I am usually the type to let a kid make their own decisions when it comes to their bodies but I would say "No, you need to wait until you're older" with this one.

Why?

Because I have a ton of friends who had their nose pierced. I don't think any of them where a nose ring now (isn't it sort of a dated look anyway?) yet they all have a little hole left over in their nose that they hate. So because of the permanent damage it can do to a body, I would say that a child had to be older before making a decision like this.

Same with tattoos.


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## karina5

Quote:


Originally Posted by *FancyD* 
I said no. It's her nose, and at that age she's ready to start making decisions like that. I would not let a 13 year-old get a tattoo, but that's permanent. *A nose piercing closes up*.


See, I disagree about it closing up. I just posted that I know several women pals of mine who really hate that they still have a hole in their nose.

Also, I haven't worn earrings in something like 15 years, yet I still have holes in my ears.


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## Fyrestorm

An unused nose piercing looks like a giant blackhead!


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## gradmama

Thanks mamas for the variety of opinions! And... for making this the best responded-to thread of mine EVER!









Health and safety were my first concerns, concerns I am well aware of as a pierced (well, not so much anymore, but...) and tattooed woman. Dd13 is mature enough to take care of it and its something she's been asking for for at least a year. And, again, I have no moral compunction about this. And....being the nonconformist that I am (although I never pierced my face, except for my tongue), I'm of the f*ck society mindset. I really don't think that she'll not get a job because of her nose stud; she can take it out for work if necessary. If she gets grief from people because of this choice, then that's actually a pretty good lesson to learn at a young age in a relatively harmless way (especially harmless because its something SHE can change if it bothers her). She can make her own decisions about what she is comfortable with...

From what I can tell, the shops that I would give business to in the town I live will not pierce her before she's 16. I took her with me recently to a parlor ('cuz I'm scheming on my next tattoo) and asked about it in front of her so I'm not the bad guy







. She seemed to accept it with, "man, nobody my age can do ANYTHING." While I think that 16 isn't necessarily "law" in this state, and I'm sure I could find a place in the city near me that would meet my standards and do it, I'm not going to search hard. As she gets older, if its something she really continues wanting, I'll find a solution before she does it herself.

Again - thanks everyone! Can I say again that I was really really excited to have one of MY threads go 5 pages!!







(yes, i'm clearly also a dork.)

P.S. I've also learned NOT to attach rewards or extras other than the ability to play sports to grades. Duly noted.


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## kijip

Quote:


Originally Posted by *princesstutu* 
Furthermore, are we seriously using potential unemployment at amusement parks as reasons to not allow a nose piercing?










Exactly this. I have my nose pierced, have had it since I was about 20. Since that time, I have worked for the Opera, worked at an attorney's office, worked in non-profit management and raised hundreds of thousands of dollars from individual and foundations (lots of face to face meetings). The fact that I can't work at Burger King or the movie theater or Disney making $7-8/hour is no skin off my teeth. If you have the skills and don't live in a very conservative place, having a small nose piercing is not going to impact your employment options. I have friends with similar piercings that are in just about every professional field. Our old pediatrician has one even, it is getting to be a non-issue.


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## DiannaK

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mtiger* 
Many/most retail establishments (apart from Hot Topic, etc) don't allow more than two piercings per ear when at work.

in the health care field, facial piercings (eyebrow, nose, lip, etc) have to be removed, or covered up (bandaid) while working.


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## smillerhouse

mY DAUGHTER HAS PIERECED HER OWN ear several times in the last few years (she is now 15) It never lasts more than a few days. Sallie


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## UnschoolnMa

I voted incorrectly due to misunderstanding the wording. I meant yes- I would allow it. And I did!







My Dd got her nose pierced at 13 and her naval pierced at 14. She is now considering doing a high cartilage piercing on her ear. She likes the look. We research and we have an excellent piercer that helps us understand things very clearly.

My job isn't to tell her what she can do with her own body. My job, IMO, is to help her understand what she's thinking of doing, to find info on it, get educated on the risks, and how to best avoid them. With all the info she can decide, with my gentle presence, if it's the best decision for her or not.


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## PoppyMama

Quote:


Originally Posted by *UnschoolnMa* 
I voted incorrectly due to misunderstanding the wording. I meant yes- I would allow it. And I did!







My Dd got her nose pierced at 13 and her naval pierced at 14. She is now considering doing a high cartilage piercing on her ear. She likes the look. We research and we have an excellent piercer that helps us understand things very clearly.

My job isn't to tell her what she can do with her own body. My job, IMO, is to help her understand what she's thinking of doing, to find info on it, get educated on the risks, and how to best avoid them. With all the info she can decide, with my gentle presence, if it's the best decision for her or not.

I totally agree. My dd has asked to get a lip piercing when she turns 13 and told her to discuss it with the piercer (who is my dp) and he has agreed to do it for her if she shows she can take care of an easier piercing first.


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## Mosaic

If it's legal, ok with the dress code, yada yada yada and she really wants it and can take care of it, I say sure. I'm typically quite conservative about this kind of thing, but I admit nose piercings can be really attractive on some people, and I know some cultures pierce noses way younger than 13.

I would rather she be in high school (which is the case for some 13yo's) because I think the attitude toward it would be tempered by the additional (relative) maturity of the community there, but in general I still would make the decision based on my DD, her maturity, etc., just as I'm sure you will.


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## karina5

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Fyrestorm* 
An unused nose piercing looks like a giant blackhead!


You're right about that! I hope anyone that is 13 will keep that in mind.


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## PiercerMom

As a body piercer, we pierce teens age 13 and up. The nose piercing is a great piercing for young girls as long as they take care of it properly. The nose is pierced with very small jewelry, so if at any time your daughter decides she no longer wants the piercing, it will heal up nicely. It is very rare that a visable scar is left from a nose piercing. Any visable scar or bump left from a piercing was caused by wearing jewelry that was too big (which leaves a bigger hole) or from the piercing being infected ("the bump"). We acually pierce many mother/daughters together for this piercing. If you would like more information about piercing aftercare, please visit my website (click on my name to the left). By the way, the girl pictured on the website with a hoop in her nose is my 18 year old daughter and I pierced her nose when she was 13.


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## smillerhouse

I say it is too young. My daughter, now 15 has been piercing herself since age 13. Currenly, she has a lipnring. She has to take it out for volleyball. It seems to be a rebellion thing. She willwear it in onservative situations and then omplian that people are judging her. I willnot approve any more piercings as a monor. She has 5 ear and had belly pierced at 14 and that lasted a very short time. I prefer the expression of changing hair color frequetly. Sallie


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## mommyinIL1976

For DD our rule is nothing more than one hole in each ear until whe turns 18. The issue hasn't come up for DSs, but the rule will be the same if they decide to pierce their ears.


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## phathui5

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Organicavocado* 
No. A reputable piercer will not pierce a minor with or without consent. I will not go to a shop that pierces minors. She rips that thing out somehow, snagged on a towel whatever (done it), and suddenly its your fault. Why not wait until she's old enough to sign for herself.. she can go to an excellent shop, research the piercing and how to care for it properly, and everybody rests easy.
I wanted my nose pierced when I was 15.. waited until I hit 18, signed for myself.. what a right of passage. I still have it.

I disagree. I got my eyebrow pierced at 16 at a reputable piercing shop. I had my ds with me and the guy figured if I was old enough to be a parent, I was old enough to get a piercing.


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## beansricerevolt

It would depend on a few things. Why does my DC want one? Are they mature enough to take on a responsibility like that? Do they know the health issues?


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## Attila the Honey

I have a small nose piercing and it's funny that you mention it looks like a giant blackhead. No lie, the hole is smaller than some of my nose pores, alas. but, imperfect skin aside....









She could always get a septum piercing, you can tuck the piercing up into the nose and no one would be the wiser.









I wouldn't have a problem with it as long as I felt she was mature enough to take care of it, it wouldn't interfere with dress codes, she knew of the risks (which, I feel, are pretty minimal) and we found a reputable shop that would do it. Oh, and we agreed on the type of jewelry she'd wear.

Most piercings seem like a pretty safe form of rebellion, they are easily removed. I plan on dealing with this stuff as suggested in that Barbara Coloroso book, I will ask dd to convince me and use that to gauge how prepared she is for the actual piercing.


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## mother_sunshine

My daughter will most likely get her nose pierced at 13. She wants it now, at 11, but I've told her she will need to wait. If you look at pictures of children in India, it is common for a young girl to have her nose pierced. My daughter and I both think it's beautiful.

The only reason why I want my daughter to wait is for societal reasons. She's in 6th grade at a fairly conservative school so I'll save her the potential grief for now.


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## kennedy444

IMO, 13 just seems too young.


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