# ~I am numb



## Avena (May 27, 2005)

My dear friend gave birth on Friday and the baby passed yesterday..I'm in total shock right now.....I've been w/them at the hospital for the last 2 days......I'm looking for guidance~
This is by far one of the hardest things I've faced, esp. that I have a newborn right now.........


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## SweetTeach (Oct 5, 2003)

I'm so sorry for her and your loss. What kind of support do you need to be able to support her? The first thing that comes to mind is to let her see you grieve- grieve with her. It is so awful to lose a baby.
So sorry...


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## Avena (May 27, 2005)

Yes I have cried with her......I'm not sure what I am looking for.....Advice on what else I can do......I am so sad


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## starlightsound (Feb 18, 2006)

Love her. Love them. Buy them some soft tissues; the ones at the hospital are like sandpaper. Make a talisman for the baby. Bring her some cabbage for her swollen breasts and make sure she has some pads. Call them at home once a week, even if they can't or don't answer the phone, hearing a familiar voice helps. Take them some food. Do a load of laundry for them if you can. And when all else fails, just hold her hand and cry.

We lost our beautiful baby boy in April. He lost oxygen during birth and passed away two days after Easter. Without our friends and family helping us in these small ways we would have been lost. We needed guidance: someone to show me how the sitz bath worked, to go grocery shopping, to make calls to find a local support group, to remind us both to eat...

These are just a few small things that helped us. Every day is still a struggle. The hardest thing for us remains reaching out, even when we need help. It's like DH and I are paralyzed.

Your love and support will make all the difference.
Hope these small suggestions help you.

Peace.


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## Avena (May 27, 2005)

Thank you all~ It's been so hard, words cannot express the pain I still feel....I did make her serveral batches of teas & sitz baths along with (another VERY sad moment of) me having to make her a tea to supress her milk









starlightsound What is...." Make a talisman for the baby"? I would love to know more

Thank you all for your kind wordds & love...............


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## amydawnsmommy (Mar 13, 2005)

to you and your friend. It's wonderful to hear that you want to be there for your friend.

Here's a page with ideas of what you can do for your friend:
http://www.hellogoodbye.ca/forfriendsandfamily.htm










Let me know if you need to talk.


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