# Loss at 18 weeks



## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

I just had a miscarriage this morning. I am having it natural, with no D&C.

So I have some questions. This is my first loss, so I have no experience with this.

My son died about 15.5 wks (my "educated" guess based on how formed he was) and I just started spotting a few days ago, but had no red until this morning. Then within an hour it was over. He came out fully intact encased in his unbroken sac. I have passed a lot of clots and such within a couple of hours, but have now reduced any bleeding and cramping to about a light AF. I have only used four pads since I began the ordeal 14 hours ago. Also, the sac was intact (as I said) so I would like to know what the fluid should have looked like. I always thought the fluid would be clearish. But the fluid around my baby was dark brownish. I was thinking merconium stained fluid?

I know that I have to watch for infection. Other than that, should I have passed a placenta? Or was it so small that it was already passed with the clots? (It wasn't inside the sac, was it?) I am feeling ok, a little sad, but somehow, I am not surprised. I have just felt "off" for the last couple of months. I am not worried about TTC again, as I will leave that up to God; but in the "grand sceme of things" what is the realm of possibilities as far as time wise? And will I likely have a pp af (like 2-6 weeks) or will it be shorter, more like a regular monthly af (4-7 days)?

I appreciate any help anyone can offer.

Thanks


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## Stayseeliz (Jul 16, 2004)

I don't have any answers mama as my loss was not that far along. I just wanted to say I was sorry for your loss.


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## iris0110 (Aug 26, 2003)

I just wanted to offer you







s. I think you probably already passed the placenta, but I'm not certain. I know that at 22wks my placenta was similar in size to my placenta at full term with ds1 (with ds2 my placenta was overly large). I definately knew when I delivered it, but I was also in a hospital so that changes things a bit. You need to watch for the same things you would watch for after a delivery. Heavy bleeding, temperature, racing heartrate, too large of clots. But I think it sounds like you have made it through the hard part (physically speaking). I am so sorry for your loss. I am sorry I don't have better answers for you.


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## pianojazzgirl (Apr 6, 2006)

I'm so sorry for your loss mama.


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## chrissy (Jun 5, 2002)

i am so so sorry for your loss mama.


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## paxye (Mar 31, 2005)

Jenny, I am so sorry for your loss


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## Naughty Dingo (May 23, 2004)

Oh Mama, I am so sorry for this sad loss of your son. I am glad for you that you were able to be at home.

When I had my miscarriage, the bleeding went on for weeks afterward, but it would stop for a day to nothing. then start again heavily. I think that a clot would get stuck in my cervix and block the flow, pass, and then allow it to open up.

My placenta at 11 weeks was about 4 inches long and wide. It was clearly identifiable. I would guess that yours will be much bigger. I wonder if you still will birth your placenta? I also had heavy bleeding that soaked beach towels and suspect that this was due to the placenta separating from the uterine wall. I don't think all women's miscarriages are the same, but you may still have some bleeding and contractions ahead of you. I was glad that I was prepared for the amount of bleeding, because it was scary to me.

As far as physically and emotionally recovering.... well of course that varies. I had a period about 8 weeks after my loss, right after my bleeding finally tapered. After that my first cycle wasn't all that great, and the next two cycles I am pretty sure I had weak progesterone. It took my body a long time to recover. emotionally I was numb for months.

Mama, take good care of yourself and talk to your body and let it know it is safe for it to do what it needs to do. I feel for you and am sending my love.

ND


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## Kidzaplenty (Jun 17, 2006)

Thank you all for your thoughs. I was kinda worried about not finding a placenta after the birth, however, today after beginning to have contractions every two minutes for about half an hour, the placenta was delivered in two pieces. I have never seen one so small (compaired to a full term one). I am sure that I am done now, as I can plainly see that it was complete.

I am very sore all over, especially after the contractions today, but the bleeding that began again right before the delivery of the placenta has again slowed to a light af. I still have trouble when I think about it being over and having contractions with no baby to show for it, but I will survive. This was my eighth pregnancy. I have seven healthy children. I guess I just never really thought it would happen to me.

The saddest part was having to tell my other children that their brother died. My eight year old daughter has been wanting to have another baby (shall I say, me have another) for a long time now, and I believe that she is taking it the hardest. But atleast their brother has a name (Zephaniah, meaning "the Lord is my secret"), and they can talk about him and remember him.

Again, thank you very much for your thoughts. I wish I was the only one that ever had to experience this; I would not wish this on anyone. But, I am very pleased that my son came into my life in the privacy of my own home, and not in a hosptal atmosphere. I had planned a UC, just not so soon.

I usually have severe after pains with my births (it seems that the after pains become more intense with each baby whereas the labor becomes less intense and shorter). So I am prepaired for them to come, however, they usually begin immediately and they haven't yet. So, perhaps I will skip that this time. I usually get my af back at 4-6 weeks pp (I never get a break even though I bf exclusively). Life goes on and there is nothing I can do to stop it.

I guess I am rambling now. Seems I have no one to really open up to so here seems very safe (we never told anyone that I was expecting so no one knows of our loss). Thank you all for allowing me to come here and ramble on. Thank you for your thoughts on my situation. Thank you for your good wishes and thoughts and prayers.


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## MoonWillow (May 24, 2006)

I miscarried yesterday myself. I don't have any words of wisdom for you. Just know that you aren't alone.


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## merpk (Dec 19, 2001)




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## Thalia (Apr 9, 2003)

I'm so sorry for your loss of Zephaniah, but glad that it happened the way you wanted it to, at home.


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## jenn1971 (Jun 8, 2006)

Im very sorry for your loss, I had a mc at 19weeks three months ago yesterday, I was actually admitted to the hospital because I was in so much pain, and having contractions, I went through labor, which was very very hard, mentally!! and I was on the floor with all the newborns







:, Im planning on trying again soon.

take care of yourself : )


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## Got_Cloth (May 14, 2005)

I am sooo sorry about your son!
Ii am glad you got to birth him at home. I too had a home birth with my son that died at 17 weeks. He was born at 21 weeks. after a 3 week and 6 day wait. On may 22, 2006. I believe that the angels we birth, bring us huge blessings, and it is an experience we must go thru for whatever reason.
i was also very thankful for my home birth with my son and adament to birth him at home, as origionally planned. I had birthed my first set of twins that died in a hospital and told my midwife, no way!

i am glad you feel OK about the way he came into this world, but I am son sorry you had to say goodbye, in the moment of hello.
hang in there mama


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