# WWYD? 18 year old and weekend trip with boyfriend



## MtBikeLover (Jun 30, 2005)

I have an 18 year old stepdaughter and my H asked me last night what I would do in this case and I am curious what others would do.

Background - I have an 18 year old step-daughter who was kept back a year so she has one more year of school and is still living at home with her mom. This is creating lots of tension because she feels she is an adult, yet she still has to obey by her moms rules (moms words, not mine...I feel her mom is WAY TOO controlling). Example - she got a tattoo (small one, behind her ear) and her mom and my H FREAKED out. I think - no big deal, she is 18, it is her body, so what. They think she has to live by mom's rules because she is still in school. And last week, her mom made her tell her what the password was on her myspace account. So.....

She asked her mom if she could go away for a few days to a lake with her boyfriend. My H is pretty against it and it sounds like her mom is too. My H asked me what I would do and I said "I'd let her go". They know she's already had sex, they know she already drinks - what is she going to do on a lake that is so much worse than what she is doing at home???

I'm just curious - WWYD? I think they both need to realize she is an adult. Even though she still has a year of school left, they need to give in a little and let her have her independence.


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## fek&fuzz (Jun 19, 2005)

I would let her go. But it doesn't sound like it's your decision.

If she feels like she's an adult, she should get a job and get her own apartment and then she can do what she likes.


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## MtBikeLover (Jun 30, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *fek&fuzz* 
I would let her go. But it doesn't sound like it's your decision.

Oh I know it is definitely not my decision. I'm just curious as to what others would do.


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## 1growingsprout (Nov 14, 2005)

Shes 18, shes an adult, its beyond 'letting' at this point. She doesnt have to as permission. I probably wouldnt want her to go. but rather then drive a spike further between my delicate relationship with my daughter i would tell her she is 18 if she has the $$ and the time off work to go, .... its her decision.

Since she is 18 has she thought about getting a GED in place of the final year of school? Is she working? I havent followed your story... im over on the 'little ones' side most of the time....


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## angelpie545 (Feb 23, 2005)

I agree, there is no "let" in this case. It never ceases to amaze me how many parents seem to think that they have a right to try to control their adult children, and how many adult children let them. She's of legal age. She can choose to go or not go, either way, it's not up to them. Sure, her parents have a right to voice their objections respectfully to her, but they have no right to tell her that she can or can't do something. It's not up to them anymore, whether she is in school or not.


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## enkmom (Aug 30, 2004)

I would have no problem with this. My issues are always things like, who is driving, is the transportation reliable, etc. If everything checks out, I always say go and have a good time.


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## PoppyMama (Jul 1, 2004)

She's 18 and legally they have no right to say where she goes and what she does with her body. Sure they can kick her out but that seems like a poor choice for a parent to make.


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## fotomama (May 6, 2006)

She sounds like a pretty mature young lady to me, if both of her parents know about her sexual activity, tattoos and drinking, and she asks permission instead of sneaking off. Seems pretty upfront to me. (Not that she'd tell them she was going to hoover up 50lbs of blow at the lakehouse, necessarily... j/k)

I'd "let" her go - she's 18, so I agree with the other mamas who say she's too old to control in the 1st place.

To the OP.... If her mom and dad are against it, I'd let it go with them if I were in your shoes. (And that would be hard!) I'd also offer to be a chaperone for the trip. Brownie points w/ your stepdaughter if you'll get her parents off her back AND be a not overbearing chaperone. And maybe added comfort for the mom and your DH, that a responsible adult will be around.

Frankly, the only thing I'd make absolutely sure to do would be having a private conversation with her about making smart adult decisions (read: are you sure you could handle a baby/std/whatever if u sleep w/ your bf over the weekend?) This is the hard line parents should be using with their kids at puberty+

Good luck!


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## MtBikeLover (Jun 30, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *fotomama* 
To the OP.... If her mom and dad are against it, I'd let it go with them if I were in your shoes. (And that would be hard!) I'd also offer to be a chaperone for the trip. Brownie points w/ your stepdaughter if you'll get her parents off her back AND be a not overbearing chaperone. And maybe added comfort for the mom and your DH, that a responsible adult will be around.

I definitely don't try to convince them of anything. In fact, I don't even usually give my opinion because I always seem to differ from my H. Then I get the "Wait til our kids are 18 and see if you have the same opinion" lecture from my H.

This post was purely just me being curious as to how others would handle it. When I see stuff going on with them, it gives me lots to think about in terms of our own children.

She lives really far away so no chance of me going. We hardly have any relationship at all anyways (thanks to her mom!).


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## MtBikeLover (Jun 30, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *fotomama* 
She sounds like a pretty mature young lady to me, if both of her parents know about her sexual activity, tattoos and drinking, and she asks permission instead of sneaking off. Seems pretty upfront to me. (Not that she'd tell them she was going to hoover up 50lbs of blow at the lakehouse, necessarily... j/k)

That was the problem with the tattoo - she didn't ask for permission and she knew her mom was against it. She did it anyways.


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## Mosaic (Jun 20, 2005)

I would probably let her go; but as others have touched on, the decision would be based more on the young lady's maturity and the specifics of the trip than her age or where she lives.


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## Indigo73 (Aug 2, 2002)

I was in high school for one week past my 18th birthday. The folks threw down the "my house, my rules" lecture one time too many and I said good bye, stayed with a friend's family until graduation and got permission to arrive at college early.

I didn't talk to either of them for over a decade and things are still strained.

Good luck with your step daughter, I wish her luck.


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## 106657 (Apr 9, 2008)

She's 18. I would let her go.


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## avivaelona (Jun 24, 2005)

I asked my mom this question and the first thing she asked was "how long has she been with the boyfriend?" I thought it was a good question, knowing that the young man is someone the girl is comfortable with and trusts would make me respond differently than if it was someone she didn't know well yet.

Basically though, she has to make her own decisions at this point, but it seems like Hubby and mom could ask for some considerations...like if she can call in once a day perhaps or some sort of "let us know you are ok" arrangements.

I'm surprised that they are so protective still, is it because its with a boyfriend? Would they let her go if it was with some girlfriends? Has she shown evidence of having extremely poor judgement?


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## bigeyes (Apr 5, 2007)

Of course I'd let her go.

My parents were super controlling, and at 18 I moved out to get away, which is exactly what she'll probably do the first chance she gets if this keeps up.

If she was 16, maybe not, but she's legally an adult, so what's the problem exactly?


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## Organicavocado (Mar 15, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MtBikeLover* 
That was the problem with the tattoo - she didn't ask for permission and she knew her mom was against it. She did it anyways.

She didn't need permission. She's 18 and can sign for herself, legally she owns her own body.

I wouldn't have a problem with it. I was on my own at 18 and still in high school (held back from kindergarten because of my parent's divorce). My now-husband would spend the night often, and we would go on trips when we could afford it.


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## amydidit (Jan 21, 2005)

Unless something has changed, 18 is legally an adult and thus she doesn't need permission to go where she wants with her boyfriend. Now, since she is still living at home that doesn't mean she can do what she wants and still live there. Her parents do have the right to kick her out if they don't like her choices, but they have no right to make the decisions for her.


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## ShadowMoon (Oct 18, 2006)

She's 18. She's an adult. I'd let her go.


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## Mama Poot (Jun 12, 2006)

She's 18. Her parents cannot control her anymore, and it would be extremely unhealthy if they did. My mom attempted that crap with me and all I did was move out and have very little to do with her since. Is that what they want? I doubt it. She'll be fine.


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## Arduinna (May 30, 2002)

She would go if she wanted to. I personally loathe the whole, still in school have to live by moms rules thing. Her decision to stay in school is great but it's her choice now that she is 18. And the last I'd be wanting to do is be a control freak so my kid wants to get away from me as soon as possible.

And don't even get me started on the on whole, you aren't an adult unless you have a job and are self supporting







.


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## SeekingJoy (Apr 30, 2007)

Like several pp, I think she should be able to make her own decisions.

I got married two weeks after my 18th birthday just so I could get away from my parents -- and I had been in college since I was 16. (Luckily, DH is incredible and we are working on 11 years together.) Is that what her parents want? I still can't/don't talk with them about anything other than the weather.


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## Ann-Marita (Sep 20, 2003)

I'd talk with her about protection, make sure she had a way to contact me if she needed, and I'd wish her a nice weekend.

Of course, I'm assuming that she has been with this fellow for a while and they treat each other well (no abuse). And the OP said that she had already had sex with him.


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## akaisha (Apr 14, 2008)

hmm, if i was her i'd be outta there, and i'm 22 so i think i'm still close enough to 18 to understand how they think at that age. i moved out 2 weeks after my 18th, and graduated high school with honours 4 months later. it can be done. however, if my 18 year old was at home and asked what i thought i'd have no issue with it whatsoever. i'd be fine with it with a 17 year old too. i did it at 17 in fact, spent a week at BF's during the summer, and weekends visiting him at university while i was 17 as well. mom didn't mind at all. we lived together for 3 years, then decided we wanted our own places and have lived apart for 18 months, 7 of those 18 in different provinces. we're still together.

what really blows my mind is the parents of the people i went to university with who didn't even live at home, or only lived at home in the summer, but worked fulltime. it was crazy how much they tried to control their lives. newsflash, your kid is an adult, lives on their own 8+ months a year, supports them self while going to school fulltime, and somehow didn't die without your constant supervision. imagine the thought.

at 18 and 21 DP and i had our own apartment and paid for all the rent and bills that go with it, except for a portion paid by DP's dad in accordance with a child support agreement. we had a car that was paid for in full by us and paid any expenses associated with that. we had credit cards we paid off every month and we were putting ourselves through university. by the time we were 19 and 22 we had also added the responsibility of our three cats into the mix as well as put new doors on my mom's house and paid for her cell phone. i guess what i'm saying is what you already know, there are a lot of 18 year olds out there who are not only make mature, adult decisions, but have the knowledge and sense of responsibility to live up to the choices they've made without asking mommy and daddy for help.


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## Jessy1019 (Aug 6, 2006)

I'd think it odd that she was asking for permission, if she were mine. 18 is an adult. If my kids are living home at that age, I will expect them to be courteous, to tell me where they're going and when they intend to come back . . . but they won't need my permission to go on vacation.


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## doctorjen (May 29, 2003)

Interesting that this is phrased in terms of "let her" or not. At 18, I hope to not be making decisions about "letting" anymore. Hopefully, by that point, they are comfortably making a lot of their own big decisions and I'm just available if advice is wanted.

My ds will be 20 next month and while he may ask me for advice about something, he doesn't ask me if he can go somewhere any more. I think, though, that really this kind of issue starts long before someone is 18 and wanting to spend the weekend away. My oldest son, and hopefully all my kids will follow suit, has slowly grown into his independence taking more and more responsibility on as he was ready for it. It started really early with when he'd ask to do something we always talked it over and made the decision together. Also, while I don't insist that he be completely self-supporting to make his own decisions, some things are only his choice if they can be his responsiblity. For example, a tattoo is completely his choice - but of course he'd have to pay for it. A weekend trip at this point would be the same way - totally his decision, but also his responsiblity to plan and pay for. We have a great relationship, though, and he will often ask me for advice about stuff like this. Last summer, it was a road trip with some college buddies, but after discussion, he didn't feel like he knew enough about the planners/drivers and didn't feel like he had the money to spare, so he didn't go. By the time they are old enough to be wanting to make bigger plans and decisions, you hope you have helped them learn to make decisions independently and with good decision making skills and that they feel comfortable enough with the adults in their lives to ask for help and advice if they need it.

(I only added that last bit because the OP mentioned having younger children and wondering how it would be different when they were bigger)


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## ma_vie_en_rose (Jun 7, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *amydidit* 
Unless something has changed, 18 is legally an adult and thus she doesn't need permission to go where she wants with her boyfriend. Now, since she is still living at home that doesn't mean she can do what she wants and still live there. Her parents do have the right to kick her out if they don't like her choices, but they have no right to make the decisions for her.

ITA

She may be old enough to do what she wants, but she is also old enough to live with the consequences of those actions.


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## PiePie (Oct 2, 2006)

wow i am expected to be in the minority with a no but i am really in the minority. wow.


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## amis2girls (Mar 2, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *PiePie* 
wow i am expected to be in the minority with a no but i am really in the minority. wow.

I am, too.


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## SheepNumber97245 (Apr 20, 2007)

I said yes because at that age she is old enough to make her own decisions. I moved out for the first time when I was 17. She's an adult. It doesn't matter if she's still in school.


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## Britishmum (Dec 25, 2001)

At 18 my parents wouldn't 'let' me go on a vacation with a group of friends. The boy wasn't even a boyfriend, just the brother of a friend, but they were clear that I wasn't 'allowed' to go.

It's all well and good saying that they have no right over her, but in reality, I felt that I had no choice. They were paying for my food and board, and I didn't want to end my relationship with them.

I didn't go, and shut up about it. But I resent it to this day. I felt controlled and belittled, and it still makes me mad. And that was over 20 years ago!

For the sake of my relationship with my kids, I hope that I never have that sort of feeling that I have power over them. I hope that when they reach that age we have had enough frank discussions that they understand safety issues - condoms, not drinking and driving etc, but at 18, I want to be able to trust them to go ahead and make good choices, while having fun.

So, I really, really hope that my relationship with my kids is good enough that at 18 I could wave them off and wish them a good time.


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## Britishmum (Dec 25, 2001)

Thinking about it, also, the thought of an 18 year old drinking alcohol makes me think -------------nothing. To me, that's normal, and I'd prefer my 18 year old enjoys a little alcohol and understands how to drink responsibly, than that I"ve controlled them so much with a puritanical outlook that they see drink as something that needs to be hidden away and sneaked.


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## Amylcd (Jun 16, 2005)

She is an adult. She no longer needs permission from her parents to do the things she wants... ( I really hope she realizes this. My sister is 20 and still does whatever my mother wants - she isn't allowed to be alone with her boyfriend, etc.)


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## mamato3cherubs (Nov 30, 2004)

Sorry to be blunt, but WOW...This is about the most ridiculous thing I have heard in a very long time.

What kind of parent thinks they can make that decision for an adult child. Yes they have the right to set rules for her to follow under that roof, but what? "you cant go, if you do, you are kicked out!". Absurd. and the idea of a chaperon at 18, that just makes me sick.

I don't care if the girl never finished the 4th grade. she is an adult.

Her parents could be making a huge mistake here. They are working on the details of how the relationship with this adult daughter is going to go in the future years.


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## MilkTrance (Jul 21, 2007)

I moved out at 18, so this thread is slightly amusing to me.


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## MilkTrance (Jul 21, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Britishmum* 
Thinking about it, also, the thought of an 18 year old drinking alcohol makes me think -------------nothing. To me, that's normal, and I'd prefer my 18 year old enjoys a little alcohol and understands how to drink responsibly, than that I"ve controlled them so much with a puritanical outlook that they see drink as something that needs to be hidden away and sneaked.

I live in Canada, so to me, drinking at 18 is pretty normal.


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## choli (Jun 20, 2002)

At 18, I had left home, was working full time, and was sending money home, not being supported.

Hard to say - if I was being financially supported at that age, I might have felt some obligation to follow my mother's rules. Since I wasn't, I didn't.


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## allgirls (Apr 16, 2004)

I have a daughter the same age. She just moved into an apartment with her boyfriend.

Think I could have stopped her?

She is a very mature young woman. She carres a job and is finishing up school(all A's last semester!) and he does the same. They saved money, they bought brand new furniture, they saved enough for their vacation and next months' rent and they are very happy together.

I cannot imagine saying no, my 18 year old couldn't go somewhere for a weekend. They should surely have some independance at 18.

This is about compliance and not parenting I think.

And yeah...she will listen because she lives under her mother's roof. But if enough of this goes on..not for long.


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## nextcommercial (Nov 8, 2005)

My dd will live by my rules until she no longer lives with me. Being 18 only makes her an adult on paper. I wasn't an "adult" til at least 20. At 18, I was still very immature.

If she had a job, made car payments, and no longer needed to be financially supported, I might think differently. But, a kid who just finished her junior year in high school, still needs more guidance.

I think it's great that she asked first though. It shows a lot of trust. It could also possibly show that she doesn't actally want to go. She might somehow be hoping someone would say "no".

By the way.. Tha tatoo was her business only. I wouldn't have even questioned it, unless I wanted to know how it was paid for.

I do think her parents are too controlling about most things.


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## pumpkinyum (Mar 27, 2007)

Nope.


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## talk de jour (Apr 21, 2005)

Jesus, she's an adult. That's the end of it as far as I'm concerned.


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## whalemilk (Jul 11, 2008)

So legally she's an adult, but because she chose to finish school (which she doesn't legally have to do at her age, she could just drop out), she gets "rewarded" by being treated like a child. Sounds like a GREAT deal, hah!

I don't get the "we're paying, we make the rules" thing. Sure you CAN do that as a parent of an adult child who receives your financial help. You can also do that to a spouse, or an elderly parent who receives your help. But why on earth would you WANT to?


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## GooeyRN (Apr 24, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *whalemilk* 
So legally she's an adult, but because she chose to finish school (which she doesn't legally have to do at her age, she could just drop out), she gets "rewarded" by being treated like a child. Sounds like a GREAT deal, hah!

I don't get the "we're paying, we make the rules" thing. Sure you CAN do that as a parent of an adult child who receives your financial help. You can also do that to a spouse, or an elderly parent who receives your help. But why on earth would you WANT to?

You know, I was thinking along those lines, too. It may be blurred into being considered financial control if the girl would be kicked out over it. I understand telling a 16 year old "no" b/c the parents are still legally responsible. I do not think the parents should finance the trip ($ for food or activities) but I worry this young adult is going to feel overly controlled. She still does need guidance at 18 and still in school, but I think she really needs to make the decision to go/not go herself. I think its fine if they don't want the boyfriend over their house, it it is her house, but I don't feel they should really control what the girl does outside of the house or with her body at this point for fear of being kicked out. That is financial control.

This girl may graduate HS and run fast and far just for personal freedom of her body and actions outside of the home. I would worry she would move in with a boy or friend that really wasn't good news, just to have help with bills and stuff. That would be sad, if the girl would have stayed home a little while longer to get some kind of job training or education and had a better life and finished her growing at home.

I don't agree with the trip for moral reasons, but I don't think I would try and stop my kids. I had 18 years to instill my values, at 18 its time to let them off the leash and let them finish growing up themselves. Hopefully I will have done a good job and they make good choices. At 18 the parents are no longer legally responsible, so if the girl gets drunk/arrested, the fines/consequences will belong to the girl, not the parents.


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## GooeyRN (Apr 24, 2006)

I don't buy the whole idea that one is not an adult until they can financially support themselves. A 13 year old can sell drugs or sell themselves for sex to get enough $ to pay for an apartment/car/utilities/food. I know several 20 and 30 something year olds who live with their boyfriends/husbands/friends who are unable to financially support themselves. That does not mean they are not adults. What about those who are over 18 but physically or mentally disabled or the elderly, or those who are pregnant and on strict bed rest..... Does that mean that many SAHP's or homemakers are not adults, b/c they do not or can not support themselves... I don't think so, personally.


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## Arduinna (May 30, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *whalemilk* 
I don't get the "we're paying, we make the rules" thing. Sure you CAN do that as a parent of an adult child who receives your financial help. You can also do that to a spouse, or an elderly parent who receives your help. But why on earth would you WANT to?

Because you are a control freak that thinks you know how someone else should live their life and will use any means possible to control others.

That was a general you of course, lol not you personally.


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## doctorjen (May 29, 2003)

I do think there is some gray area as our kids grow older - I mean, I do agree with the idea that you're an adult even if you still need some financial support, but I don't think that other adults are required to finiancially support things they don't agree with. So I wouldn't, for an extreme example, give my kid money to buy cocaine - but neither do I feel that I can always be playing the "I support you so I call the shots" card either.
I think as parents we have to work to help foster our children's independence as the opportunities come up. I know a lot of parents who don't do that, who try to retain a lot of control over decisions, and as a result end up alienating their kids or end up with young adult kids who have no clue how to function in the world. From a young age, I expect my kids to be making their own decisions - with guidance and support and a safety net when needed and the younger they are, with some veto power for issues of safety especially, but largely I try to guide them into making their own decisions.
I have friends who have young adult kids who have gone so far trying to fight for their own independence the relationship has been damaged, or who have lived their lives so isolated from the consequences of their own decisions that they now are making terrible choices and expecting to be rescued repeatedly.


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## whalemilk (Jul 11, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Arduinna* 
Because you are a control freak that thinks you know how someone else should live their life and will use any means possible to control others.

That was a general you of course, lol not you personally.

It's ok I knew you were talking about my inlaws, lol.


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## harrietsmama (Dec 10, 2001)

I was allowed to do this at 15 - with his parents there. He was 20 and they let us sleep in the same bed. I learned later that the dad was in regular contact with my mom. She knew what was happening, she knew I was on the pill, that I wasn't drinking/drugging and that Brian was a super sweet guy.


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## Ruthla (Jun 2, 2004)

At age 18, I'd expect to talk to my child, give counsel on whether or not I thought a trip like this was a good idea, etc, but I wouldn't absolutely forbid it. At age 16 or 17 I'd probably say "no, not unless there's an adult chaperone that I trust" but no way would I be so absolute or controlling with an 18yo!

I can't beleive the mom asked for her MySpace password- I wouldn't even do that to a 14yo!

But, as a stepmom, I think you should stay out of it and let your DH and his X deal with this. I disagree with how they're handling it, but you could damage your relationship with your DH if you try to interfere.


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## GooeyRN (Apr 24, 2006)

Asking for the myspace password is WAY controlling when dealing with an 18 year old. I can see doing that for a 13 year old who isn't very trustworthy. But NOT an 18 year old. If I were that girl, I would have a secret myspace account in addition to the one my controlling mom knew about.


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## sbrinton (Jul 17, 2008)

I think it is up to the parents on whom she still relies like a child. She is legally an adult, but she is not acting like one if she is still living at home with her parents' support. I think it is completely reasonable for the parent's to still set expectations about behavior.

She wants the freedom of being an adult, but is not taking on the responsibility. In my opinion, these should go together. If she wants more freedom, she needs to take on more responsibility.

I don't think she is too young to go on vacation with her boyfriend. I met my now husband at 17 and he and I traveled to Europe together before I turned 18. We got engaged when I was 18 and spent the summer I turned 19 traveling around Asia. But by 17, I was living on my own, in college and working to support myself. I wanted the freedom, so I took on the responsibility.


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## PassionateWriter (Feb 27, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *angelpie545* 
I agree, there is no "let" in this case. It never ceases to amaze me how many parents seem to think that they have a right to try to control their adult children, and how many adult children let them. She's of legal age. She can choose to go or not go, either way, it's not up to them. Sure, her parents have a right to voice their objections respectfully to her, but they have no right to tell her that she can or can't do something. It's not up to them anymore, whether she is in school or not.


yeh that!


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## Arduinna (May 30, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *sbrinton* 
I think it is up to the parents on whom she still relies like a child. She is legally an adult, but she is not acting like one if she is still living at home with her parents' support. I think it is completely reasonable for the parent's to still set expectations about behavior.

*She wants the freedom of being an adult, but is not taking on the responsibility.* In my opinion, these should go together. If she wants more freedom, she needs to take on more responsibility.

I don't think she is too young to go on vacation with her boyfriend. I met my now husband at 17 and he and I traveled to Europe together before I turned 18. We got engaged when I was 18 and spent the summer I turned 19 traveling around Asia. But by 17, I was living on my own, in college and working to support myself. I wanted the freedom, so I took on the responsibility.

What are you talking about? She is finishing high school, so she isn't "taking on responsibility"?


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## mommy68 (Mar 13, 2006)

I voted yes, but only because she is already 18 and is considered an adult. That doesn't mean I wouldn't feel uncomfortable with it.









I have a teen son now and I am starting to feel differently about things I was more lax on before. I'd likely have a hard time even if he was 18 and asked to do something like this. It's different when it's "your" child.









Quote:

But, as a stepmom, I think you should stay out of it and let your DH and his X deal with this. I disagree with how they're handling it, but you could damage your relationship with your DH if you try to interfere.
I agree to a certain extent.


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## Momtwice (Nov 21, 2001)

I notice that she got a tattoo without permission, but she IS asking for permission for this.

I would think about WHY she is asking for permission. Maybe she has doubts or worries or concerns (Ranging from sex to her parents' reaction to the trip.)

I'd have SOMEONE have a heart to heart with her because I think asking for permission for this but not other things is interesting. Doesn't mean I'd say no.....it means I think she might want someone to talk to!


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## Linda17892 (12 d ago)

amydidit said:


> Unless something has changed, 18 is legally an adult and thus she doesn't need permission to go where she wants with her boyfriend. Now, since she is still living at home that doesn't mean she can do what she wants and still live there. Her parents do have the right to kick her out if they don't like her choices, but they have no right to make the decisions for her.


 But what if she’s helping pay bills while living at her parents house ?


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## Linda17892 (12 d ago)

amydidit said:


> Unless something has changed, 18 is legally an adult and thus she doesn't need permission to go where she wants with her boyfriend. Now, since she is still living at home that doesn't mean she can do what she wants and still live there. Her parents do have the right to kick her out if they don't like her choices, but they have no right to make the decisions for her.


But what if she’s living at her parents house and helping out with bills ?


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