# At what age do they stop being annoying?



## celia (Apr 22, 2005)

That sounds terrible I know.... Don't get me wrong- my 3.5 yr. old is adorable. She's SO funny and really a good kid I love her more than my own life-- but she really drives me nuts so much of the time. She NEVER NEVER NEVER stops talking, asking for things, asking questions etc. etc.







And she is just incapable of playing by herself for more than 5 minutes. I know this is normal 3 year old behavoir- but when does it stop? It's probably bothering me more because I just became a SAHM a few months ago. She's not used to being home having been in full time daycare surrounded by other kids and activities all day long. Do we just need an adjustment period? Anyone?


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## stellimamo (Jan 9, 2006)

Do you live anywhere near Indianapolis? Because we should get our dds together. Mine is exactly the same. All she does is talk, talk, talk, talk... I hardly get a word in edgewise. She doesn't like to play by herself much either. I totally understand where you are coming from!


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## BunniMummi (Jan 28, 2005)

Oh god, I'm there with DS1. Today a quick stop into a store bathroom turned into 5 minutes of me going "Hey, underpants... pull them up?" and him going on and on about how the door to the bathroom was just like the door at home and how DS2 had gotten his finger pinched. It's like his brain is working really hard on stringing together all these words and he has to try as many different ways of saying something as he can come up with. I try to be as patient as possible with him but... GAH! Ok ok already!

My mother laughs and says I'm just getting what I deserve after what I put her through.


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## zinemama (Feb 2, 2002)

I have a 5 and an 8yo. I would say that the annoying behaviors of children never go away. They just take different forms.

However, the form you are dealing with is among the most insanity-inducing. You have my sympathy


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## heidirk (Oct 19, 2007)

I was just going to say, I'm thirty and I still annoy my dad sometimes!


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## MommaFox (Jul 21, 2008)

My son srated talking when he was very, very young. Like 4 or 5 months. It started with "doggy" then "Light" followed quickly by "Read book pleade" and "I'll do it myself!" He's going to be 7 in two days, and hasn't shut up in the time between. This is what he looks like














:




























:






















Strangers are so impressed by how well spoken he is. I put on my best Shrek impression and say "Aye. It's gettin' him to shut up that's the trick." I get the strangest looks. I don't know what to tell you, but I feel your pain.


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## Ruthla (Jun 2, 2004)

I think they stop being annoying around age 35.









Seriously, they do over time develop the ability to play independently- exactly when they can do it for how long varies widely from one child to another. My 6.5yo is still annoying at times, will repeat the same knock-knock joke over and over and over again, etc, but he does know how to be quiet when I ask him to (as long as I don't ask for too much in one day when he needs my attention) and is capable of independent play for an hour or two at a time (though, again, sometimes it's much shorter then he'll say hello and go back out.)

I'd say my girls were past that " talking incessantly in a way that made no sense to anybody but themselves and each other) phase by age 8 or so.


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## polishprinsezz (Dec 31, 2006)

ha ha! never. their your kids they'll always annoy you.


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## polishprinsezz (Dec 31, 2006)

oops! double post.


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## I-AM-Mother (Aug 6, 2008)

children stop being annoying around the same age adults stop being annoying.


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## MusicianDad (Jun 24, 2008)

Dd still hasn't stopped talking.


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## mistymama (Oct 12, 2004)

ds talks non-stop.







My parents say I'm getting payback because I did the very same thing .. in fact, they invented a game called "quiet mouse" when they needed some peace and quiet. The object of the game was to be "quiet as a mouse" and try not to make the first sound.









I'll admit, I've tried to play this game with my son, and he's horrible at it! :rofl:


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## MusicianDad (Jun 24, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mistymama* 
ds talks non-stop.







My parents say I'm getting payback because I did the very same thing .. in fact, they invented a game called "quiet mouse" when they needed some peace and quiet. The object of the game was to be "quiet as a mouse" and try not to make the first sound.









I'll admit, I've tried to play this game with my son, and he's horrible at it! :rofl:











We're told (by dd) that since dh and I don't talk much, _someone_ has to do it all!


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## wemoon (Aug 31, 2002)

I would say that once my kids hit the age of 5-6 they stopped the constant talking and asking of questions. I also helped curve that by telling them to think about why something is the way it is instead of always asking. I also tell them that I don't know everything, which may be a little rude, but well, it is the truth!


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## meesa143 (Jul 3, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MommaFox* 
My son srated talking when he was very, very young. Like 4 or 5 months. It started with "doggy" then "Light" followed quickly by "Read book pleade" and "I'll do it myself!" He's going to be 7 in two days, and hasn't shut up in the time between. This is what he looks like














:




























:






















Strangers are so impressed by how well spoken he is. I put on my best Shrek impression and say "Aye. It's gettin' him to shut up that's the trick." I get the strangest looks. I don't know what to tell you, but I feel your pain.

















:

I'm right there with you. I was just thinking about this today. I cut back my hours at work a few weeks ago and so I think I'm just noticing it more. My dd NEVER stops talking....ever. Even when no one is listening. Both of my kids even talk or sing themselves to sleep.


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## Dena (May 29, 2006)

Oh, my goodness. I have one of these too. I am not as versed with the smilies as MommaFox, but mine looks a lot like hers.









The car is the worst. One, I am trapped in there with her. Two, it is an enclosed space and she often gets loud when she gets excited. Three, I am trapped in there with her. Four, she has tons of stuff passing by to act as fodder for her commentaries. Five, did I mention I am TRAPPED in there with her?

In the grocery store I have been known to say, "please, just. stop. talking. Just for one minute. So I can think." Sometimes it actually works, if she can tell I am close enough to the end of my rope.







(As an aside, I find it interesting that she usually knows _just_ how far she can push me.) I get some glares, but I figure either they have never been parents or never had one like mine. Oddly, I remember my mom saying the same thing to me, though not till I was a little older. Ah, karma is a lovely thing, yes?


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## Dena (May 29, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MusicianDad* 









We're told (by dd) that since dh and I don't talk much, _someone_ has to do it all!











I can see my kid saying something like this in a couple of years - that would totally be her logic.


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## hipumpkins (Jul 25, 2003)

I often say," Johanna started talking at 9 mos and hasn't stopped yet!"

Her brother didn't START talking until he was close to 3. Everyone wanted him tested...I enjoyed the silence.

sometimes DD complains that someone interrupted her and I have to remind her that if one is always talking then one will get interrupted now and then.


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## Shanana (May 11, 2005)

OMG I wish I knew. DD1 just turned three and NEVER shuts up! She will play some independently, thank goodness, or I think I'd go insane.

I also try to encourage her to think of the answers to her questions. If I just repeat the question back to her she won't cooperate, but if I put some intermediate steps in there, it usually works. Example:
"Mama, why are their garbage cans in a cart?"
"Well, today is garbage day, right?"
"Yes."
"So the garbage cans have to be carried out to the curb. Do you think they might be heavy?"
"Yes."
"So, why do you think they might use a cart to carry them?"
"Maybe because they're too heavy."

Or something to that effect ...

It is tiring as heck, though, and I have been known to growl, "No questions!!!! Mama is NOT answering questions right now!" "But why, mama?" "Was that a question?" "Yes." "Okay! NOT ANSWERING QUESTIONS RIGHT NOW."


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## p1gg1e (Apr 3, 2004)

Ok







: This is normal....It does not stop at age 4









Ive just been medicating myself with Saint Johns Wort and Skullcap to keep myself from bitting her head off









I have two girls I'm doomed!


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## Llyra (Jan 16, 2005)

Some days I pretend I have to pee, and I go in the bathroom, and lock myself in for a few minutes and sit on the closed toilet, just to get a brief spell of peace and quiet.

I find I don't really enjoy the preschool age so much.

I used to work with 6 and 7 year olds, though, and I found them pretty easy to spend time with. So I think it gets better pretty quickly.

It can really help to get another kid in for your 3 year old to play with, to take the attention off you. They're at an age where they're really interested in learning to play WITH somebody, and if there's nobody but you, guess who's it? I've gotten a lot of relief by creating chances for DD to play with another child, in a situation where she feels comfortable.

It also helps to lay down some routines and some boundaries for how you spend your days. For example, my DD knows that after I put the babies to bed for their naps, I sit at the table and read my newspaper for a little while, and I do NOT play during that time. It took me being very kind but firm about that, in order for her to learn to accept it, but once we got that routine established, she's naturally pretty accepting of it.


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## rubyeta (Jan 11, 2007)

My 12 year old ds is a super talker. he always has been. he wakes up in the morning and finishes the sentence he left off on the night before. he follows me around the house talking STILL at 12yo! I think i am lucky, it is better than the other way around, at least i know what is going on in his life. but GOSH, SOMETIMES I NEED A BREAK!!! One time i offered him 5 bucks to be quiet for 5 minutes (as a silly game, of course) I watched the clock, he made it to 38 seconds!!!


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## Surfacing (Jul 19, 2005)

My 3 y.o. is a talker also. But she makes up inane chatter, spouts nonsense, and repeats things a lot. Not so much commentary on everything around her (but she does do this sometimes of course).

She likes to repeat that she misses her grandfather.....who died 8 mos ago.......but honestly I think it's just something she says for the sake of having something to say. The girl likes to talk. And talk. And talk. Sometimes I wish I was better company for her!


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## stlmomof2 (Mar 30, 2006)

A lot of times I don't mind the chatter and questions but I really really would love to eat breakfast without talking about it in the most pointless ways.
"Mommy, are you eating cereal?"
"Yes."
"What kind of cereal?"
"All Bran."
"What kind of All Bran?"
"It's just All Bran."
"Just All Bran?"
"Yes."
"I want some of that. I want some of YOUR favorite cereal."
"Okay, once I'm done eating here, I'll get you more to eat."
"Are you drinking coffee right now?"
"No, but the coffee is brewing."
"I want to help you. I want to help you make coffee."
"Nope, the work is already done. The coffee is almost done already."
"What kind of cup is that? Is that a coffee cup?"
"Yes. It's a coffee cup."
"I want to play that game with you, mommy. Let's play that chess game."
"NO! Just let me drink my coffee in peace. Please!"
"After you are done drinking coffee, we will go somewhere. Where can we go, Mommy?"

Just thinking about these conversations makes me tired. But at the same time, it's kind of sad thinking about a time when DD won't chatter and ask questions constantly.


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## One_Girl (Feb 8, 2008)

Dd has always been a talker and I remember that being hard when it first started to peak and become nonstop but she didn't change. I became accustomed to who she was and began encouraging her to be herself. I do however insist on a few minutes in the morning to drink my coffee and I always have. I find that when I am home for extended periods of time with dd that it helps both of us if we get out of the house and do something most days. We go to the park or a school playground most days, sometimes to the zoo, the library twice a week, occassional trips to the mall, etc... In some places there are mothers groups for SAHMs and if you pick somewhere like the library or one park to go to at the same time daily or weekly you will probably start to meet people that you and she are happy to be friends with.


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## macca333 (Jun 14, 2008)

Gosh, all these posts are my DD !!


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## celia (Apr 22, 2005)

Well.... these posts don't give me much hope. Atleast I know it's not just me. DS is 11 weeks old. I'm hoping boys aren't as chatty as girls


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## bl987ue (Mar 14, 2006)

Dream on! My little boy is the uber-chatterbox. I do believe he just loves to hear himself talk--he is the narrator of his own life. When I get too tired of answering the endless questions, I turn them around on him. "Mom, what would happen if blah blah blah?" "I don't know--what do you think would happen?"


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## SAHDS (Mar 28, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *hipumpkins* 
I often say," Johanna started talking at 9 mos and hasn't stopped yet!"

Her brother didn't START talking until he was close to 3. Everyone wanted him tested...I enjoyed the silence.


Sounds just like my kids!

DS actually has Dyspraxia, though, and we've done so much speech therapy and classes, schooling and the like. He's 7 now and DH and I often look at each other and say "And we *wanted* him to talk???"









But, I notice kids get more annoying, lol. Once they stop talking so much, it's the _way_ that they talk to you that's annoying.


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## hattoo (Aug 30, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mandymichel* 
A lot of times I don't mind the chatter and questions but I really really would love to eat breakfast without talking about it in the most pointless ways.
"Mommy, are you eating cereal?"
"Yes."
"What kind of cereal?"
"All Bran."
"What kind of All Bran?"
"It's just All Bran."
"Just All Bran?"
"Yes."
"I want some of that. I want some of YOUR favorite cereal."
"Okay, once I'm done eating here, I'll get you more to eat."
"Are you drinking coffee right now?"
"No, but the coffee is brewing."
"I want to help you. I want to help you make coffee."
"Nope, the work is already done. The coffee is almost done already."
"What kind of cup is that? Is that a coffee cup?"
"Yes. It's a coffee cup."
"I want to play that game with you, mommy. Let's play that chess game."
"NO! Just let me drink my coffee in peace. Please!"
"After you are done drinking coffee, we will go somewhere. Where can we go, Mommy?"

Just thinking about these conversations makes me tired. But at the same time, it's kind of sad thinking about a time when DD won't chatter and ask questions constantly.


Fabulous!!! ROFL!!


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## mamasee (Dec 1, 2007)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *celia* 
It's probably bothering me more because I just became a SAHM a few months ago. She's not used to being home having been in full time daycare surrounded by other kids and activities all day long. Do we just need an adjustment period? Anyone?

Yes, yes, yes. It is an adjustment. I worked part-time until dd was 18mo (she stayed home with my dh) and I never fully appreciated what a break it was to go to an office and work (away from home) each day. When my dh went back to work and I started staying home full-time, he would literally find me on the floor in tears at the end of many days. How could my own, sweet, dd be so exhausting and completely overwhelming???? She is high-need / spirited, but still, I am a capable, loving, patient adult! She had me completely overwhelmed by her non-stop need for me to give her attention. When I am rational about it, I can see that she is simply like a sponge wanting all the knowledge and love she can get from her parents, but in the midst of it it is beyond belief overwhelming at times. Anyway, adjustment period, my answer is definitely yes. You will learn coping skills - and for me it felt like someone threw me in the ocean to teach me how to swim. Some other posters gave some hints about letting their kids know when you reached your limit. It's true, we have to set the limits or some (all) kids will just keep testing and testing. My dd is really sensitive, so I have learned that the sooner I can say to her "I am getting frustrated, I need to do something else now", the easier we get along. Otherwise, we usually both end up exploding in emotion. She doesn't understand why her play and chatter would drive me nuts unless I tell her and I try, try try to tell her earlier in the rise of my frustration than later. Anyway, for me, that is the learning curve - noticing when I am starting to get frustrated and then telling her or somehow changing the scene for us so that I feel some relief - before I get completely overwhelmed. I tell her how I feel and what I need and then I do it. If she chooses to have a meltdown about it, then I know that she is making that choice, but I am not being a caring parent if I simply do her bidding 24/7. Another tip I learned from watching my husband is that sometimes less is more (or enough). Pace yourself in your part in the play. My dd doesn't need 100% of me all the time (although she would happily take it). Participate with her, but you don't have to do everything they ask just because they ask. Participate in a way that works for you (again, for me this is a big part of the learning curve - I am more of a work-a-holic than a play-a-holic). So, now what usually works for me is I try to get focused on some task that I want or need to do and I just keep calmly repeating "I am going to fold the clothes now (or whatever the task). If you want to help me, you can." Sometimes it works, sometimes we have meltdowns, but at least sometimes it works!
Hang in there!!!!! You can do it!!!!! Absorb the love they give you and try to weather the rest as best you can!!!!!!!!


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## stlmomof2 (Mar 30, 2006)

I notice that DH doesn't get as annoyed with DD because he feels okay about occasionally ignoring her and doing his own thing. I mean, he'll tell her that he needs time to himself and have her do something else by herself. I, on the other hand, feel immense GUILT if I'm not always doing what she wants to do and talking to her. Most of her requests are great ideas. She wants me to read books. She wants to "help" me write checks. She wants to make muffins. She wants to sort laundry. She wants us to do yoga together. She wants to learn how to play all of our board games. She wants to do art projects. She wants to go to the children's museum. She wants me to help her learn all sorts of important things. I just feel bad about not always having the energy to help her do all of these important things.


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## medicmama (May 5, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Dena* 
Oh, my goodness. I have one of these too. I am not as versed with the smilies as MommaFox, but mine looks a lot like hers.









The car is the worst. One, I am trapped in there with her. Two, it is an enclosed space and she often gets loud when she gets excited. Three, I am trapped in there with her. Four, she has tons of stuff passing by to act as fodder for her commentaries. Five, did I mention I am TRAPPED in there with her?

In the grocery store I have been known to say, "please, just. stop. talking. Just for one minute. So I can think." Sometimes it actually works, if she can tell I am close enough to the end of my rope.







(As an aside, I find it interesting that she usually knows _just_ how far she can push me.) I get some glares, but I figure either they have never been parents or never had one like mine. Oddly, I remember my mom saying the same thing to me, though not till I was a little older. Ah, karma is a lovely thing, yes?









What kills me is *did I mention I am TRAPPED in there with her?*

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Shanana* 
OMG I wish I knew. DD1 just turned three and NEVER shuts up! She will play some independently, thank goodness, or I think I'd go insane.

I also try to encourage her to think of the answers to her questions. If I just repeat the question back to her she won't cooperate, but if I put some intermediate steps in there, it usually works. Example:
"Mama, why are their garbage cans in a cart?"
"Well, today is garbage day, right?"
"Yes."
"So the garbage cans have to be carried out to the curb. Do you think they might be heavy?"
"Yes."
"So, why do you think they might use a cart to carry them?"
"Maybe because they're too heavy."

Or something to that effect ...

It is tiring as heck, though, and I have been known to growl, "No questions!!!! Mama is NOT answering questions right now!" "But why, mama?" "Was that a question?" "Yes." "Okay! NOT ANSWERING QUESTIONS RIGHT NOW."

Not to self : Need to try this with my 8 y/o

Quote:


Originally Posted by *SAHDS* 
Sounds just like my kids!

DS actually has Dyspraxia, though, and we've done so much speech therapy and classes, schooling and the like. He's 7 now and DH and I often look at each other and say "And we *wanted* him to talk???"









But, I notice kids get more annoying, lol. *Once they stop talking so much, it's the way that they talk to you that's annoying.*

OMG so true!


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## proudmamanow (Aug 12, 2003)

I'm there with you 100% on the nonstop talker (she monologued for 7 hours straight, no nap on a recent road trip) and one who's very reluctant to play independently. Sigh. It wears me down. But she's sooooooooooo adorable and says such funny things too!
She's also, wait for it...3.5!


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## mamato3cherubs (Nov 30, 2004)

I havnt read all the replies but she might never outgrow it.

Hate to say it, but my 12.5 yo is the most annoying of all my kids. He NEVER stops talking. hes a smart kid, so the only difference between what you describe and what I have here, is that rather than always asking questions, he is constantly carrying on to everyone about all sorts of random facts. Informing people of how everything in the universe works. and yes, i love him more than the world he loves to talk about


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## pigpokey (Feb 23, 2006)

The title of this thread makes me smile every time I open this forum.


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## mommajb (Mar 4, 2005)

I was just checking in to see if it ever stopped. My oldest is 11. I see Ruthla thinks I may be old enough that I no longer annoy my parents. Too bad I travel with an entourage.


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## stlmomof2 (Mar 30, 2006)

Argh... I am so annoyed by DD right now. I hate when she asks me the same question two or more times in a row:
"Mommy, what are you doing?"
"I'm running in place."
"You're running in place? Oh. Mommy, what are you doing?"
I just hate this.


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## p1gg1e (Apr 3, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mandymichel* 
Argh... I am so annoyed by DD right now. I hate when she asks me the same question two or more times in a row:
"Mommy, what are you doing?"
"I'm running in place."
"You're running in place? Oh. Mommy, what are you doing?"
I just hate this.

LMAO I have that some questioning going on here! Its pretty aggravating when you have answered them nicely ALL DAY LONG...Ive been mean and beating her to the punch and asking myself all the questions that are just about to come out of her mouth...then she will giggle and start to open her mouth and I'll think of the ONE that I forgot to ask me ...then she looks at me like " I wasn't going to ask that one...."

ODD starts preschool on tuesday ...so I can have her talk to someone else LOL







Love her but gezze age 3-4 is HARD!


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## Breeder (May 28, 2006)

I'm pretty sure I STILL annoy my mother. I'm 28.

I _never_ listen to her parenting advice.
I'm hard headed.
I'm trying to make her grandson a freak by not letting him watch tv all day and not giving him soda AND sending him to a hippie school







.
I didn't have a big wedding.
I work outside of the home.
etc etc etc etc etc etc

I'll post as soon as she lets me know I've stopped being annoying. I'm just certain it's gonna be real soon.


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## stlmomof2 (Mar 30, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *p1gg1e* 
LMAO I have that some questioning going on here! Its pretty aggravating when you have answered them nicely ALL DAY LONG...Ive been mean and beating her to the punch and asking myself all the questions that are just about to come out of her mouth...then she will giggle and start to open her mouth and I'll think of the ONE that I forgot to ask me ...then she looks at me like " I wasn't going to ask that one...."

ODD starts preschool on tuesday ...so I can have her talk to someone else LOL







Love her but gezze age 3-4 is HARD!

I have to be away from her for awhile from time to time so that I can put things in perspective. Sometimes in the heat of all the questioning, I start to feel like she's just TRYING to drive me crazy--like she's interrogating me and trying to get me to slip up. Sometimes I will actually have time away from her and I'll be doing something and I can hear her questions in my head kind of like a guilty conscience. Like I'll have the extreme luxury of making my lunch without her around and I can still hear her little ghost voice: "Mommy, what are you making? I want to sit on the counter. I want to help you make a sandwich. I want some of that bread. What kind of bread is that? What's in this bread? I don't like this bread. Here, Mommy. Can you eat this bread?"
I like the preemptive attacks on the questions. I have tried that before, sort of to play a game like I'll be the kid and you be the mommy, but she doesn't seem to understand how to do that yet.


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## SusanInItaly (Oct 5, 2003)

My 5 yr old DS (who did go thru several years of SP) doesn't talk non-stop, he asks curious questions and pretty much only talks when he really has something to say. He's not a quiet child, but he is also not obsessed with talking....however....

My 7 1/2 yr old DD is!!!!!!! OMG SHE MAKES ME NUTS. I love her to bits, she is very intelligent and has lots of awesome questions and we have great discussions about everything, war, anatomy, space and the solar system, you name it. BUT inbetween is just nonstop chatter about everything. She interrupts quite a bit as well. I have to ask her to just be quiet sometimes, because I can not think with all the noise. The thing she does that REALLY annoys me is she makes noises if she's not talking. Humming, singing, making annoying noises, etc. THAT makes me nuts.


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## stlmomof2 (Mar 30, 2006)

Weird... my girl makes noises, too. Like a lot of half nonsense singsongy talk, often in super high pitch. Little bits of songs here and there strung together combined with repeating the same phrases or nonsense words over and over. It's very annoying, yes. To be honest, sometimes it kind of worries me. Do all talky kids do this? I don't really see other kids in public doing this, but then, my DD most often does it at home. Almost any time we're not making conversation, she's talking/singing gibberish kind of like this:


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## tapmilkmom (May 25, 2005)

OP, thank you so much for asking this question!!

I told my 3.5 year old that "the cookies will bake faster if we are very very quiet!"









It had been all day long of nothing but talktalktalktalktalktalktalktalk!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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## MusicianDad (Jun 24, 2008)

Spent four hours on a plane with little Miss Chatterbox. Twice. And she can't sleep while moving so it was constant talk!


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## p1gg1e (Apr 3, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mandymichel* 
Weird... my girl makes noises, too. Like a lot of half nonsense singsongy talk, often in super high pitch. Little bits of songs here and there strung together combined with repeating the same phrases or nonsense words over and over. It's very annoying, yes. To be honest, sometimes it kind of worries me. Do all talky kids do this? I don't really see other kids in public doing this, but then, my DD most often does it at home. Almost any time we're not making conversation, she's talking/singing gibberish kind of like this:





Wow I'm impressed she can do a puzzle at age 24 months!! My 4yo cant even do one


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## stlmomof2 (Mar 30, 2006)

She can't do puzzles anymore at almost 3yo. She gets distracted by the animals and starts making them talk to each other, chase each other, jump off the couch, etc.


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## celia (Apr 22, 2005)

OP here









Just wanted to say how much it meant to me to read that I'm NOT a horrible selfish person and this is all very normal and there are moms all over the country going through the same thing all day long... I've been learning recently that I need COMPANY. I need playdates. Anyone else nearby helps distract her and even makes her seem adorable and funny to me. SO my new mission is making more stay-at-home momy friends. That's a whole 'nother thread though.


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## newmom2n (Sep 18, 2008)

OMG thank you to everyone who has posted on this thread!!!!!! Ahhhh.... while i'm deeply sympathetic I'm so good to hear about the same situation over and over and over and over!









My husband and I became "insta-parents" to our 3.5yo niece about 7 months ago. So imagine if you will that you don't have any children, your time is all your own and all you have to do for peace and quiet is turn the TV off... remember those days??? For most of you it was probably a long time ago and you've had YEARS to build up to this stage.... we had no warm-up period, we were thrown head first into the full on non-stop-talking-question-asking-tantrum-throwing-can't-sit-still-random-sound-making-non-stop-talking that seems to be standard issue for 3.5yos.... I seriously thought I was going to go INSANE these last few weeks when she decided to add "non-stop-for-no-reason-crying" to her repertoire of "annoyance".

I have been reading all the books we bought AGAIN, I talked to her school, I've talked to every person that I know with kids and they all seem to have miraculously spared the lives of their children and still have hair so I know it HAS to pass!







Her other specialty is to disagree with everything you say as in:
HER: I can go outside and play
ME: No honey its dark outside, you can't go outside
HER: Its not dark, I can go outside
ME: look out the window, its dark, the sun has gone to bed
HER: no it hasn't, its not dark, I can go outside...

Feel free to substitute any situation into the above scenario and I'm sure it will match a conversation I've had in the last week....

So again, I say THANK YOU for sharing your stories... i feel like I can actually make it another day knowing that I'm not the only one suffering at the tongue/persistence of a toddler!


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## Dena (May 29, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *newmom2n* 
Her other specialty is to disagree with everything you say as in:
HER: I can go outside and play
ME: No honey its dark outside, you can't go outside
HER: Its not dark, I can go outside
ME: look out the window, its dark, the sun has gone to bed
HER: no it hasn't, its not dark, I can go outside...

Feel free to substitute any situation into the above scenario and I'm sure it will match a conversation I've had in the last week....











We have these conversations too. She will insist that the sky is not blue, the grass is not green, you name it. Makes me







.

Most of the time I just go along with it because I don't have the energy for the fight. Sweatsuit in 80 degree weather because she insists its cold out? Sure, honey, whatever. The funny thing is she will wear it all day and not change because then she would have to admit she was wrong.


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## wendyland (Apr 5, 2003)

Thank you for this thread. I feel so bad sometimes about being annoyed by the kids. I'm an only child and I love quiet. I go to Barnes and noble at least once a week to have my quiet time.

My 9 yo hasn't been annoying since around first grade, but her stories bore me to death. I have a hard time acting like I'm interested. She's always shoving school paperwork in my face as soon when I'm busy. (I really need a place to put those papers so I can look later). She is really great about helping me clean and watching the other two.

The 4 yo (almost 5) is the one that irks me right now. It's so hard to get her to do ANYTHING. Or to stop doing ANYTHING. She's very touchy feeling and won't leave the baby alone. She talks or sings nonstop. There's a lot that I like about her age/stage, but also a lot of annoying things.


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## Phoenix~Mama (Dec 24, 2007)

Oh thank God it's an age thing! lol This too shall pass.

Like PP I have felt interrogated already by DSD... She has to know EVERYTHING... and honestly it's so weird to have to explain my every move, it makes me feel very self concious or something, and I'm a very free spirit, so to be constantly asked why I am doing something or every detail of where I am going... it bizarre to me. lol

For instance I will have some down time, and DSD is playing with DH, so I am playing a computer game... well she gets distracted and comes over,

"Jen, what are you doing?"
"Playing a game."
"Why are you playing a game?"
"Because it is fun and I like too."
"why is it fun, why are you playing that game?"
"because it is fun and I like to... like isn't it fun when you play with your toys? why do you like playing with your toys?"
"oh... yes that is fun too."

It's just funy sometimes to watch their minds work things out... lol


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## GooeyRN (Apr 24, 2006)

My dd has been driving me crazy. She NEVER stops talking. Seriously. She even talks in her sleep. She will ask the same question 10-15 times in a row. I am really struggling with this age.


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## mamazee (Jan 5, 2003)

The constant talking wont end. That's a behavior trait and I'm afraid I never outgrew it anyway.







My daughter will probably be that way for life.


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## p1gg1e (Apr 3, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *GooeyRN* 
My dd has been driving me crazy. She NEVER stops talking. Seriously. She even talks in her sleep. She will ask the same question 10-15 times in a row. I am really struggling with this age.

LMAO when I got your post as an email alert on this thread I thought "she must have a 3 yo"









Age 4 has been complaining , arguing and opposites







...with the never ending and never right question...in circles and then suddenly ODD acts as if she cant hear and repeats the same process ...

OK bad day here Ill just stop







:


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## stlmomof2 (Mar 30, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *JSMa* 
Oh thank God it's an age thing! lol This too shall pass.

Like PP I have felt interrogated already by DSD... She has to know EVERYTHING... and honestly it's so weird to have to explain my every move, it makes me feel very self concious or something, and I'm a very free spirit, so to be constantly asked why I am doing something or every detail of where I am going... it bizarre to me. lol

Yes! My DD interrogates me, too. I might just look up slightly in the direction of the window ("Mommy, what are you looking at? What's out there?") or I pick at a hangnail ("Mommy, what are you doing?"). I really have to remind myself that she's not just TRYING to annoy me.
Sometimes she reminds me of a retail/fast food manager because every time I sit down to relax, she comes up with a new annoying task for me ("Mommy, let's make a shake." "Mommy, I want to play this game with you.")
Like right now... I have to read another freaking book. Argh... I can't wait until she can read.


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## amynbebes (Aug 28, 2008)

Well, from an early age I just decided that my 13 yr old dd loves the sound of her own voice







Just this afternoon she was reading all of her homework to me, the problems, the answers, etc. Heck, if she's in the right mood she'd read the back of the shampoo bottle to me if I let her.


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## alexsam (May 10, 2005)

Yes. ALL. THE. TIME. Talking. 4 yrs old...

Personally, it only really gets to me when I'm in pain or really busy/frustrated. At the moment, I'm pregnant, due in 2 weeks. I've had a lot of BH contractions, everything is sore, I'm exhausted.... you know. The pregnancy complaint list is a mile long... So just as I sit down... "Can I have some water? Read me this! Watch me on the swing! You forgot to pick up that block and put it away. When is Daddy coming home? Why is the cat scared of my balloon? Why is it a rainy day? Can you get me down my boat from the shelf?" and ON, and ON, and ON...

I've found that if I am clear about things, It's not too bad "I'm tired. I'm sitting down in a minute. I will not get up. If you want anything, ask now."

Also (this may be terrible, but I don't think so), the chattering does not always need a 100% response. If we are in the car and I'm getting a running commentary "Hey! That cow is running! Look a big truck!" you know... I can say things like "Hmmm..." and "Yup!" and not really look or even really listen too hard. Kind of tune it out. I have found that I need to perk up a bit for questions (lest they get repeated with increasing urgency and frustration) but then I can give a concise answer. I think we are trained to listen to others and think about what they are saying and the polite and reasonable thing to do is to participate with thoughtful contributions. But I don't think a 3/4 yr old is really talking to get this. I think they want to be connected and are verbally describing things. It is enough for them to know you are there and listening, but full-on 100% attention is not what they really need or are looking for.

As for funny, I've been amused lately at the "Why did I...?" questions. "Why don't I like beans? Why did I say that funny thing? Why did I get scared of the thunder? Why do I like the swing so much? Why when I was a baby did I cry?" Ummmm.....


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## Surfacing (Jul 19, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *alexsam* 
I think we are trained to listen to others and think about what they are saying and the polite and reasonable thing to do is to participate with thoughtful contributions. But I don't think a 3/4 yr old is really talking to get this. I think they want to be connected and are verbally describing things. It is enough for them to know you are there and listening, but full-on 100% attention is not what they really need or are looking for.









Right, not all the time.

I used to think that I needed to have all the answers too. Like when dd would say, "Oh no! Now what do I do?" or "Oh no! Now I'll NEVER be able to xyz" then I'd jump in with explanations, suggestions, etc. But now I turn it back to her saying, "Well this is a chance to problem solve. What do YOU think you should do?"


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## Dena (May 29, 2006)

Had a conversation with my 4 year old this morning that made me think of this thread:

Dd: I want some water.
Me: Please.
Dd: Please. In my bunny cup.

So I go to the cupboard, during which time she says, "in whatever cup you want me to have."

Not realizing this is a modification of her earlier request, I pull out the bunny cup and hand it to her so she can get her water from the fridge dispenser.

Dd: Why did you want me to have this white cup?
Me: Well, you said you wanted your bunny cup.
Dd: Well, I don't any more.
Me: (while walking away wondering if there is an aspirin big enough for this) Well, you said any cup I wanted you to have. That is the one I wanted you to have.
Dd: Why did you want me to have this cup?

AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!








:


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## MommaFox (Jul 21, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *newmom2n* 
HER: I can go outside and play
ME: No honey its dark outside, you can't go outside
HER: Its not dark, I can go outside
ME: look out the window, its dark, the sun has gone to bed
HER: no it hasn't, its not dark, I can go outside...











Me and my ds, especially in the summer (around summer solstice, the sun doesn't set til 9 or so):

Me: Time for bed, good night.
DS (looking out of the window and noticing the sun hasn't set):But it isn't nighttime.
Me: Yes, it is. Good Night.
DS (with great frustration, as though speaking to a student who just doesn't get it): It's night on the other side of the world, Mommy.

So much for teaching kids science....


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