# Where do they sleep when spending the night with someone else?



## emmoss (Feb 3, 2015)

My DS is 16 weeks and he sleeps in bed with us. I have no idea when we'll move him to his own bed. His grandparents mention taking him for the night, but no way. But it gets me thinking, where do your babies/kids sleep when they are at someone else's house for the night? Or do they not stay with other people for the night? The few times I tried putting DS in his crib before I'm ready for bed he wakes up after 5 minutes screaming and then screams unconsolably for an hour. So no way is he ready to be anywhere other than in bed with me, nor do I want him gone for the night (or at all).


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## katelove (Apr 28, 2009)

My daughter had her first sleepover when she was 2.5yo, the night before her baby sister was born. Since then she's had lots just for fun. She sleeps on a mattress at the foot of my parents bed but sometimes falls asleep in their bed or climbs into bed in the early hours. She is fine with the arrangement.


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## ericaness (Oct 9, 2008)

Mine have never stayed with anyone else. I haven't seen a reason for my babies to stay overnight with their grandparents while they're still sleeping with us all night. My older kids sleep mostly in their own bed, so they would probably be fine overnight, but not the baby.


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## farmer (Mar 11, 2008)

My kids didn't do sleepovers until they were older, so it really wasn't an issue. They tended to sleep together when they were out of the family bed, but not quite on their own. 

I had my nieces here a few years ago--they were maybe 7 and 3? I had them sleep on each end of the couch, and I slept next to the little one--I had NO idea how they would be at night, since I'm pretty sure the little one was still co-sleeping, but they both slept fine.


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## JamieCatheryn (Dec 31, 2005)

Mine don't stay with grandparents until after age 4. How would a nursing baby stay overnight with someone else? I can't even imagine my weaning and part time sleeping alone 2 year old without at least daddy with him when he wakes at night. Still, my friend watches her nephew often and they bedshare when they keep him overnight, perhaps if the kid is used to staying away from mom and dad that works, I've noticed some kids are very happy to be close to most anybody.


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## stormborn (Dec 8, 2001)

Mine never did, but when I kept my nephews overnight at that age they slept with me. When DH and I were older teens watching our best friend's little girl we would make a giant pillow fort at the foot of our bed for her to sleep in...she thought that was the best thing ever.


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## contactmaya (Feb 21, 2006)

I would never allow my nursing baby, or even a formula fed baby to spend the night with someone else....weird. What for?

When my son went on his first sleepover at age 6, he slept in his friends room.... my experience is that co sleeping makes children very independent.


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## Sunflower80 (Feb 11, 2013)

Mine were older. The only time my eldest had to sleep away from me was when I was having her sister, but then she was only in a room upstairs in bed with her grandparents. By the time they were both 6/7 they were happy to go for sleepovers with friends and it's never been an issue, I think all kids get to this point at different ages though.


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## Comtessa (Sep 16, 2008)

DS was about 14 mos and still nursing a lot when DH and I first left him with my parents and his big sister overnight. (She was 2 at her first overnight). We were doing a weekend getaway nearby at a B&B. It was a disaster. Not because of him, but because I forgot to bring my pump and I was so painfully engorged it was horrible! I've never been very good at hand expressing milk - I should have learned before then! Night nursing apparently demands more supply than I thought I'd had.

Anyway, both kids did fine at that age, but being away from them at night was really hard for me. By age 2 everybody was ok with sleepovers at Grandma's. DS cosleeps (still; he's 4 years old now) at home but not at Grandma's, usually, though sometimes he'll climb in with mom at night. When he was littler he slept with my mom or dad when he was there overnight. Works fine for us.


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## luckiest (Apr 29, 2009)

DS was over 4 when he slept somewhere else the first time. It went well, he slept in bed with his friend (at the home of close family friends where he spends a lot of time), but he said afterward that he didn't want to do anymore sleepovers. 

A few months later his grandma and cousins came and stayed at our house while DH and I went away for the weekend. He slept in a bed with his cousin and it went fine. 

I would never have even considered a sleepover as an option with anyone until he was 4, he just wouldn't have been ready before then. 


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## TealCandy (Dec 14, 2014)

My little guy is 15 months and hasn't been away from us at night, but it's a likely possibility since baby 2 is due in a few months. I also don't see the need for overnight trips until kids are older and definitely able to handle them. But obviously, he'll need to be with someone while his brother is being born. I'm not worried about it, though. He only recently stopped nursing until completely asleep, but never had issues falling asleep for anyone else. We were surprised how smooth it went the first time someone else put him to bed. I think kids usually know that things are different when they're somewhere different and they cope. Not what I want to make him do every night or just for fun, but I bet he'll handle it.


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## louisa0987 (Apr 29, 2015)

My lo sometimes spends the night at my parents place and mom sleeps with her, so all good. Would leave her co sleep with anyone else at this point...


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## countrymomma555 (Jul 24, 2015)

my DD hasn't officially spent the night away, but when we were staying as a family with DH's parents, DH and i went out for dinner and a movie while MIL and FIL watched her... she was about a year old and MIL lay down with her until she fell asleep in our bed, then put pillows around her as guards and left. she was very understanding about her needing someone to go to sleep. not sure how she would be now that DD is 3... but at 16 weeks i would not be letting my LO stay at other people's houses personally... i think it's way to young, but it's totally up to you and your partner.
hope this helps!


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## RosemaryV (Aug 30, 2013)

My daughter is 17 months, still breastfeeding and cosleeping, and has never slept anywhere that I am not (actually, we've never been apart more than 2 hours). I can't imagine letting her stay anywhere without me/us for several years yet...one of her grandmothers started hinting at wanting to do this when she was only a few months old, but I knew it would not be happening. I just don't see the need for attached babies to be away from their mothers at night, outside of an emergency...I think a lot of grandparents just fantasize about having baby 'all to themselves'. But in most cases I think it would be a stressor for baby and mama...


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