# Is comfort nursing really so bad?



## 555Baby (Mar 30, 2005)

My 7 week old loves to nurse. When she is cranky for any reason, nursing is a really simple way to comfort her (though if I try I can console her with rocking / walking / stuff like that.) This seems ok to me, but I keep reading stuff that says you shouldn't always comfort your baby with nursing or she will learn to use food for comfort instead of learning better ways to self soothe. Obviously, I don't want to set my baby up for a lifetime of weight problems or using food for comfort. What do others think? Do you try to avoid nursing for comfort?

The other problem I have is that when she is crying it is hard to really evaluate if she is actually hungry or not--she doesn't give feeding cues when she is screaming. I tend to give her the breast & if she rejects it then I try something else. But she doesn't reject it very often (and she is the size to prove it--she is 95th percentile in height & weight now.)


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## Ruthla (Jun 2, 2004)

I absolutly love comfort nursing!!!!

Whatever books that are telling you to avoid comfort nursing are WRONG!!!!! OK, they're not AP at least.


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## chersolly (Aug 29, 2004)

Trust your instincts.


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## melolyn (Jul 13, 2002)

Absolutely nothing wrong with comfort nursing! I hate when people act like there is something wrong with a child who needs a comfort item (mommy's breasts or otherwise) lol

Melanie


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## ExuberantDaffodil (May 22, 2005)

1 of the beautiful things about breastfeeding is babies learn very early how to suck to get food and how to comfort suck (non nutriave sucking i think it is called) whne ds wants to nurse just for comfort he doesn't suck as hard and therefore gets very little if any milk. when he's hungry, he _Gulps_!

breastfed babies has a lower risk of obesity for this very reason. bottlefed babies get milk out of a bottle nipple regardless of whether they are comfort-eating or hungry-eating.

oh yeah, and I comfort nurse ds ALL the time - when he's tired, when he falls, when he's cranky - blah blah blah and he knows perfectly well how to soothe himself...


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## broodymama (May 3, 2004)

My DS comfort nurses all the time.







He's not learning to turn to food for comfort, he's turning to mommy for comfort.


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## alegna (Jan 14, 2003)

Throw out whatever you're reading. Why should a mother comforting a baby be bad? Absurd.

-Angela


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## TiredX2 (Jan 7, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *LadyBug & BabyBug*
He's not learning to turn to food for comfort, he's turning to mommy for comfort.









:

I have never heard from a legitamite source that comfort nursing is bad. If you look at the AAP position on bfeeding, many actions (such as increased alertness, rooting, etc...) are seen as reasons to nurse.

Sure, kids need to learn other ways of recieving comfort, but I think 7 weeks is a bit young to worry about it :LOL Humans are born "premature" because of our huge heads, I figure those first nine months they should legitamately still be in the womb are pretty much "free game" for their needs and wants being identical.


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## MamaTT (Aug 29, 2003)

What everyone else said.

A) Comfort sucking isn't a high-volume endeavor.

B) She is learning to turn to other caring human beings for comfort, not inanimate material objects.

What would you rather encourage?


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## Mama25 (Jul 20, 2004)

I never understood how "they" say no comfort sucking on the breast but it is ok for a baby to comfort suck on a pacifier. If comfort sucking is wrong so should be pacifiers then if you follow "their" thinking. But "they" say an object is ok to a comfort a baby but not a person. The books also seem to say this about other areas as well, like ok to use the swing vs holding the baby too much.

*note I am not saying pacis/swings are wrong, just making a point

Kim Ann


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## luv2*b*mom (Mar 24, 2004)

nothing at all wrong with it! enjoy it!!


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## christiab (Jan 13, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Mama25*
I never understood how "they" say no comfort sucking on the breast but it is ok for a baby to comfort suck on a pacifier. If comfort sucking is wrong so should be pacifiers then if you follow "their" thinking. But "they" say an object is ok to a comfort a baby but not a person. The books also seem to say this about other areas as well, like ok to use the swing vs holding the baby too much.

Kim Ann

Ditto!!! These are usually the same people that tell you you you're holding the baby too much, then pick your baby up themselves as soon as he touches the sheet. (Like my mom)


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## saratchka (May 2, 2005)

My only hesitation with using nursing to comfort dd EVERY time is that I know that I can't be with her all the time. Sometimes she has to stay with DH or, in the future, other caregivers who won't be able to nurse her when she's unhappy. I don't intend to be apart from her for more than a few hours at a time, but a few hours can be a long time. So I try to mix it up a little. If I'm pretty sure she's not hungry, I'll sometimes nurse, and sometimes walk, and sometimes sing, and sometimes do a combination of two or all three.







If I'm not sure what she needs and hunger is a possibility, I always check her diaper first (usually if she's really upset, she's wet) and offer the breast second.


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## MamaPear (Oct 10, 2004)

I'm currently reading "Mothering your Nursing Toddler" by Norma Jane Bumgarner and there is a passage early in the book that I wish I had had when DD was an infant. I hope that reading it will help you and other mothers overcome the fear that they are "spoiling" their DC by nursing too much.

Quote:

Nursing is clearly better than handing a kid a cookie and telling him to go play. It's more like sitting down to a cup of tea with a sympathetic friend.
P.5
There is no such thing as breastfeeding too much! Follow your instincts mama! You're doing great.


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## Camellia (Jun 2, 2004)

Ditto to what everyone else said and I just have to add that I _loathe_ the phrase "self soothe". She is a baby, don't be afraid to treat her like one. It sounds like you are doing a wonderful job mama. Keep it up


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## jerawo (Jan 28, 2003)

Better than crying imo...


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## Benji'sMom (Sep 14, 2004)

Please don't worry about your child's weight - comfort sucking will not make a baby obese. Breastfed babies just tend to gain weight quicker in the first 6 months, then the weight gain tapers off. My DS weighed 25 lbs. at six months. Guess how much he weighs now, at 15 months - 25 lbs!! If you're worried specifically about the weight, there's no need to worry. Like everyone has said, if she's comfort sucking she's not really eating.


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## captain optimism (Jan 2, 2003)

I learned from a pre-natal class I took with an international board certified lactation consultant (IBCLC--she was also an RN) that there are scheduled growth spurts during which the baby will want to nurse all the time. You should let her. This is how the baby builds up your supply so you will have enough to feed her as she grows bigger. One of these growth spurts is at 6 weeks. Your baby could still be in the growth spurt. Here is when the IBCLC predicted them:

10 days
3 weeks
6 weeks
3 months
6 months

If someone tells you that you are "comfort nursing" a seven week old baby, they are inexperienced or misinformed. Seven week old babies will often nurse ALL THE TIME. As everyone else on the thread has said, breastfed babies tend to be big in the first six months and then small compared to formula babies in the second six months and into toddlerhood. So be cool!

The other thing I learned from this class that was INCREDIBLY helpful when my son was that age was that screaming is a late feeding cue. So try to get a boob into her mouth just as soon as she starts rooting around. If she puts her little hand in her mouth, or smacks her lips--pull up your shirt! Don't wait!

Also, your dd is reaching an age when she might scream a lot regardless of whether she needs to nurse. Between six weeks and four months they can get really overwhelmed by stimulation, especially in the early evening. It's not necessarily colic, they just have "happy hour"--as Dr. Sears terms it. It gets to be evening and everything is just TOO MUCH. Make sure to put her in a sling or baby carrier, if your back can handle it. Use it even earlier in the day. It will mellow her out. Plus right now it feels so sweet, when they are tiny, to carry them close to your heart.


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## dynamohumm6 (Feb 22, 2005)

I second what captain optimism said--crying is a late feeding cue. She had great advice!
As far as comfort nursing, both my kids were/are huge comfort nursers, and my 6 year old is a petite little thing (she weaned when she was 2, she's never been "overweight", but she was a 10+ lbs newborn and in the 95th percentile for weight until she was about 9 months old).
My son only gets milk out when he's hungry. When he's truly comfort sucking, I rarely get a let down anymore (now that he's three weeks old and my milk supply has started to even out a bit.
Comfort nurse away!


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## justmama (Dec 24, 2002)

My daughter never really gave off any feeding cues, just went straight to screaming. She was a preemie and was born without the rooting reflex and without suck-swallow-breathe coordination. We had a rough start. So to check to see if she's hungry once she got the root reflex I'd kiss her cheeks. I would kiss one cheek after the other over and over and if she was hungry or wanted to nurse, she'd follow my lips. It was a good way to check her hunger gauge and to smooch her up at the same time! We still do it at 6 months old, though now she does just turn her head and start pulling down my shirt when she's ready to nurse!








Meg


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## MTBto5 (Jul 13, 2004)

We do it all the time


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## GodChick (Jul 5, 2005)

nak

nothing wrong w/ comfort nursing! mama's breast is a perfectly valid and reasonable place for baby to seek comfort.


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## proud mama of 2 (Dec 16, 2004)

Nothing wrong with comfort nursing.

Those people are the same people that are saying it's OK to put a baby in a swing etc. to comfort... why is an object OK and not mama?


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## velcromom (Sep 23, 2003)

Comforting a child whenever they need it, however they need it, is appropriate and loving. Nothing bad about it.


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## velcromom (Sep 23, 2003)

And remember that crying is a late indicator of hunger. It's baby's last resort effort to get mama's attention. My ds was pretty much a constant nurser in the early months, I think anyone growing that fast is probably hungry just about all the time.

If it helps, I comfort nursed both my boys whenever they needed it and it has caused no problems whatsoever for us. In fact, I credit comfort nursing with helping to keep my boys calm and happy as infants, and with making the toddler years a lot less stressful. It's amazing how just latching on for a few minutes can cause a major improvement in attitude!


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## DeepGreen29 (Mar 25, 2005)

Babies learn to be comforted in many different ways. If you are worried that the baby's daddy or the grandma will have trouble comforting him-dont!

If they are around him enough, and have loving arms and will do what it takes (rock, hold, cuddle etc) they will be fine.

Baby will learn that Dad comforts by walking him around or rocking or something. You don't necessarily have to "teach" a small baby those things.

Please follow your instincts and your baby's cues.


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## [email protected] (May 31, 2004)

I have always comfort-nursed my babies. I don't think not doing it should be an issue. I think it is an important role of motherhood.
Uzra


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## PinkSunfish (Oct 20, 2002)

My DD is 15 months old and she still nurses for comfort. if she is hurt or having a major meltdown it is what she asks for and is a surefire way to calm her down.

I don't see anything "wrong" with it and if other people thik it's wrong well that yah boo sucks to them.

It's your child and your body *trust your instincts*.

I think comfort nursing is great, especially for young babies.

Also, in very young babies you should *never* assume that they are not actually hungry. They have a lot of growth spurts and the frequent nursing is neccessary to build your supply and give them the right amount and right kind of milk for their needs.


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## Momtwice (Nov 21, 2001)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *555Baby*
My 7 week old loves to nurse. When she is cranky for any reason, nursing is a really simple way to comfort her (though if I try I can console her with rocking / walking / stuff like that.) This seems ok to me, but I keep reading stuff that says you shouldn't always comfort your baby with nursing or she will learn to use food for comfort instead of learning better ways to self soothe.

I agree to throw out what you are reading!!! What sources are say this? For instance, What to Expect the First Year, the Baby Whisperer, and Babywise are books with really ***bad*** breastfeeding advice.

Quote:

Obviously, I don't want to set my baby up for a lifetime of weight problems or using food for comfort. What do others think? Do you try to avoid nursing for comfort?
I once made the mistake of trying to avoid nursing for comfort and it hurt my milk supply.

The best way to avoid your baby being overweight is to breastfeed exclusively for at least 6 months (and as long afterward as desired when solids are added, for at least one to two years) as the major health organizations recommend (AAP, AAFP, American Dieticians, WHO, UNICEF etc.) Formula is linked to obesity. The best way to keep up your milk supply is to nurse on cue whenever baby wants. It may surprise you how often baby wants to nurse but it is normal and healthy.

Quote:

The other problem I have is that when she is crying it is hard to really evaluate if she is actually hungry or not--she doesn't give feeding cues when she is screaming. I tend to give her the breast & if she rejects it then I try something else. But she doesn't reject it very often (and she is the size to prove it--she is 95th percentile in height & weight now.)
Sounds good to me to nurse first.

Here is info about comfort nursing.
http://kellymom.com/parenting/sleep/comfortnursing.html

I'm really curious about what books you are reading!


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## cuddlebug (Jun 29, 2005)

I comfort nurse my son all the time. I am not worried about him becoming obese or not learning to self sooth or what ever other problem 'they' say it can cause. I just think of it as him getting mommy snuggles to help calm him down, and it is way better than giving baby a pacifire, which is what a lot of people do.
Yvonne


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## kymberlynn (Jan 29, 2005)

Oh Man! This brings back memories!! A friend and I met a woman at church that had a four month old little girl. We were both pregnant at the time and had already nursed one previous child. Her daughter was sitting in a baby carrier on the floor and was starting to fuss. She checked her watch and looked at the baby and told her that she still had 45 minutes before she could eat and to just be patient. I think at that time I'd made the comment that I wished my daughter was still nursing b/c it would have made those early terrible two's so much easier if I could just nurse through the temper fits! The lady turned to me and said that she doesn't nurse for comfort only for nutrition. My friend and I looked at each other and as I opened my mouth to say something my friend just shook her head. She totally knew what I was going to say!! :LOL

Anyway, we ended up watching her daughter fuss and root and suck on her fists for about 15 minutes before I finally spoke up. I said that her daughter seemed really hungry. The lady rolled her eyes at me and said that her daughter was trying to control her and that SHE was in charge of when she ate. She finally sighed and said fine. She pulled out one of those big drape things and nursed under it. The WHOLE time she was telling her daughter that she shouldn't think she'd actually gotten away with anything, as soon as they left church she was back on her schedule. The entire time that poor baby was gulping just as fast as she could, like she sensed that this was a short term luxury.

SO YES!! Nurse for comfort, nurse for fun, nurse b/c you WANT to!!


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## Momtwice (Nov 21, 2001)

I had a thought since my last post.

"Is comfort nursing really so bad?" was the question.

You could also say

"Is hugging really so bad?"

"Is world peace really so bad?"

"Would winning a million dollars really be so bad?"

You get the idea.


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