# Tell us your story for a chance to win!



## JenniO11 (Dec 7, 2011)

Share your story with us for a chance to win a gift basket from Floradix!

Floradix and Mothering want to hear from you: *Did your mom talk to you about your period? How will you educate your daughter? Enter before Wednesday, May 16th to win!*

*Here's how to enter:*

*1) *Tell us a story about your own experience with your period, your menarche rituals, or how you plan to help your daughter understand and celebrate her first period.

*2) *Check back with us next Friday, May 18th, to see who won!

Our period is the key to our fertility. We chart it, we hope for it to arrive, we wish it would stay away, we use reuseable products, we exercise, we eat right, we do everything we can to keep our bodies natural and healthy and embrace our fertility.



One of our longtime sponsors here at Mothering, Floradix, is giving away a Floradix Gift Basket to the woman who tells us about how they learned about their period and how they will educate their daughters about every woman's monthly visitor.

No matter how much we embrace our fertility, your period can suck the life out of you. You know the feeling. The world seems like it's moving at warp speed - but you're stuck in slow motion. This is partially because Aunt Flo can deplete your iron stores, leaving you feeling fatigued and exhausted. You deserve better. Floradix Iron + Herbs provides the iron you need to reclaim your natural energy and vitality. For over 60 years, women have trusted Floradix to have their back when Aunt Flo comes for a visit.

All menstruating women are at risk for iron deficiency. During pregnancy a women's iron requirement doubles, further increasing the risk. Only 1 in 5 women enter their pregnancy with enough iron. Without proper diet and effective supplementation, iron stores in the blood can plummet.

Why Floradix liquid iron?

Floradix is a unique low-dose liquid iron supplement. With highly soluble iron gluconate as well as whole food concentrates and co-fact B- and C-vitamins, Floradix is easily absorbed by the body, quickly replenishing iron levels for renewed vitality.



Floradix is:

- Clinically proven to normalize low iron levels

- Naturopath and midwife recommended

- Easy on the digestive tract

- Additive- and preservative-free

- Ideal for vegetarians and vegans

- Nonconstipating

One winner will receive a Floradix Gift Basket, which includes an 8.5 oz. bottle of Floradix & Floravital, new Floradix tablets, & a DVD of the film "The Business of Being Born."


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## EarthyLady (Jul 15, 2005)

My mom never talked to me about it. In fact, when my sister got her period for the first time and had questions, my mom made fun of her and made her feel stupid for not already knowing the answers. I've been talking to my daughter about periods since she was 2. She's almost 9 now and I'm starting to also talk to her about what it might feel like and what it means to being able to get pregnant. I've also told her that I will teach her how to chart her cycles. I was 26 before I heard about ovulation and charting. I couldn't believe I'd never been taught that in school! As a homeschool family, I choose to teach this incredibly valuable information to my daughters! I have 3 of them! I want them to have a sense of empowerment with their bodies. Not secrecy and shame.


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## chavasmommy (May 9, 2012)

My mom first told me about my period when I was about 10. She explained it in a down-to-earth, very unscary way, which I appreciate. She just explained to me that it would come about once a month, there would be blood, and it might be uncomfortable, but that if I ever thought I was having it, just to come to her and she would show me what to do. She didn't really tell me much about the fact that I could get pregnant after having it - my mom was very hush-hush on things like sexuality/pregnancy/birth and so when I overheard my friends talking about that part of it I was a little bit confused. Also, when my friends were talking about how if your period is late you are probably pregnant, and then my period showed up late several times when I was 11 or 12 I was really confused. I didn't know that sometimes in young teenagers it can take awhile for your cycle to even out. I plan on telling my daughter things slightly differently - like why we get our period, and explaining that it's not dirty, it's a normal function, even showing her how to chart when she gets closer to being sexually active. I didn't learn about charting until after I had already had my first child, and I think it's something every girl/woman should know and be comfortable with.


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## bellydance2290 (Dec 22, 2006)

I learned the basics in school, I think around 4th or 5th grade. I don't recall my Mom ever talking about it with me and when I got my period I pretty much just got pads while shopping and that was that.

I already talk to my 3.5 yr old about it and plan on being very open and honest about it with her. I'd love to do some sort of simple ceremony/celebration when she gets it and plan on teaching her how to chart, etc.


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## MrsJPS (Jan 12, 2011)

Issues like puberty and sex were not comfortably discussed in my home growing up, though I felt my parents wished they had established a more comfortable environment for such discussions before the damage of embarrassment had been done. When we were shown the puberty video in school, my mom took the initiative to buy the offered box of celebratory menstrual supplies, a dark blue cardboard box with fireworks all over it. I was embarrassed to receive it but secretly intrigued and excited, and I refused to let myself open the box until the fateful day arrived!

My husband and I hope to create a home environment in which our children feel safe and comfortable approaching us to talk about topics like sex and development. We want to respond to their questions with age-appropriate answers, without giving them the impression we wish they hadn't asked. My daughter is only two months old, so we've got a while until she enters puberty, but I look forward to helping her begin her journey of understanding sexuality and her body as soon and questions and curiosity arise.


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## anachka (Oct 24, 2011)

It wasn't really openly talked about in my family (which is crazy considering it was a primarily female household!) I plan on engaging in an open dialogue about menses as well as having a ritualistic celebration when my girl begins her moon (think Blessing Way for the onset of Woman-hood


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## AngiG (May 9, 2012)

My mom did talk to me about it so I knew what to expect. I don't remember the details but I do remember she also gave me a book about anatomy and reproduction. When I did get my period just before my 13th birthday, my mom wasn't home, so I went into her room and put on a pad and went to school. When I got home, my mom already knew that I started because I had left the box on the sink. She took me to the store and bought me a box, the pads marketed especially for teens. I felt really grown up and proud.

I am a doula, childbirth educator and a mom of three. I have 2 boys (11 and 7) and 1 girl (age 3). I have always been really open and matter of fact when it comes to reproduction, babies, breasts and birth. I think we answer their questions honestly and simply. As they get older, we add more details. I always want my kids to know they can come to me with questions and trust that I will give them honest answers. At this point, my daughter knows that babies grow in their mommies uterus and come out of the birth canal, which is also the vagina. She knows that breasts are for making milk and nurturing babies. She knows that sometimes mom wears a pad because she bleeds a little every month which is normal and she will need to wear pads one day, too, but not for a long time. As she gets older, I will explain how babies are made and why we have a period every month. When she does start her period, we may celebrate with a special mom and daughter outing, like lunch and shopping.

I think its important to talk to our sons about these topics too. My oldest son learned how babies are made when he was seven and I was pregnant with his sister. I told him that moms and dads make babies (which had known since he was 2) but at seven he wanted to know more. I started with moms have tiny eggs that are released once a month. If the daddy fertilizes the egg with his sperm, a baby will start to grow. He then started asking how the dad gets the sperm in there. Then we talked about how moms and dads bodies fit together like a puzzle. The older he gets the more we build on his knowledge, giving him honest information in easy to understand pieces. I am doing the same with my middle son and my daughter.

I want my children to grow to love and respect their bodies, and those of the opposite sex. I also want them to view birth and breastfeeding as normal and natural.


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## hamilka (Feb 15, 2011)

In fourth grade (about age 10) my mom took me shopping and out for ice cream where we had "the talk" which encompassed not only male/female sexuality but also what I could expect soon each month. She presented it in a factual way, but also took the time to make sure my questions were answered. We went and purchased supplies that I would need and I felt comfortable coming to her with worries over the next couple years when my period came - making sure that skipping months was normal, if things were heavy, or just when I needed understanding my emotions.

Now as the mother of two daughters and one on the way, while I appreciate what my mom did for me, I hope to celebrate this time in my daughters' lives and make it special for them a little differently. I want to take them out for a special dinner when their monthly arrives. I would like to make a kit with cute cloth pads, books and information on menstruation (because sometimes hearing it from another person helps!) and also a note that they're changing and that's okay - I'll still be here for them during these next rocky years with it's many ups and downs. I also hope to educate them on natural family planning and how a woman's cycle changes her mood, temperature, cervix and fluid levels - something my mom never told me about.

I will get to do this three times (!) in the coming future so I know I'll learn as each daughter passes into this new time in her life. I don't consider it awkward, or a burden, but a joy to share with them and I hope they will consider it a wonderful thing too.


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## Yiotula (May 9, 2012)

I'm lucky and my flow is light. When I tell my daughter about it (she's only 7, hopefully has a year or two) I am so glad she will have the menstrual cup option. I love my cup, it never leaks and it makes you feel like it is a normal day and not one of "those" days!


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## Mary Olin (May 10, 2012)

My mother talked about body parts and menstruation like it was no big deal. I just remember knowing how my body worked and what all my parts were called at a very young age. I remember one time in 3rd grade a friend at school telling me about seeing her mom in the bath "and she had weird hair down there" and me saying "Oh, you mean pubic hair?" I guess I thought everyone just talked about their bodies, boy was I surprised!

Because I was raised being comfortable with talking about anything really, I had no problem being as open with my own children. My 3 boys knew as much about menstruation as their sister. When my daughter started her first cycle, I made her a "pamper yourself bucket" full of bath and beauty products and we had a "period party" just for the girls and invited our closest girlfriends. When we came home from our celebration, her daddy gave her a bouquet of flowers he had picked up on his way home from work.

Our lovely daughter is 18 now and will be off to college next year where she will be studying to be a midwife and will be talking about vaginas and periods and placentas for a very long time.


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## briannas auntie (Feb 21, 2011)

I was in the 3rd. grade when my mom talked to me about puberty and getting a period. She had just come back from parent-teacher conferences at grade school and asked me to go in her bedroom with her. She had a pen and note book with her and started to talk about what was going to happen to my body. She drew pictures of what my uterus looked like (Mom's not a good drawer) and how the thick lining would one day keep a baby comfortable when I became pregnant. Until then, she explained that every month, that thick lining wasn't necessary, and would leave my body through my vagina for a couple of day. I assumed that this lining was like having to pee for several days nonstop, but mom told me that it was blood and tissue. I remember saying "EWWWWWW!", but Mom said that it was natural and part of every healthy woman's rite of passage into becoming a mother someday. After she was done explaining that, she showed me a bag of pads that she had bought for me that were just for teenagers (at the time, Always and Carefree made pads that were just for teens) and how they were used. She asked if I had any questions and also gave me a booklet that she had got from her gynecologist about growing up.

One thing I most definetly remember is glaring at my 3rd. grade teacher all day the next day, thinking that she was the one that told Mom to tell me all of this and forcing me to get a training bra. I later found out that Mom just thought it was the right time to tell me and that the parent-teacher conferences had nothing to do with it. Silly me! A year later, I started my period at home and Mom again, was very understanding and reassuring and helped me with using a pad, and she even got me my own heating pad for cramps. We also had a special dinner of my choice that night to celebrate me entering womanhood.

When I have a baby girl in the future and when she goes through puberty, I will be just as calm and reassuring as my Mom was to me. The only difference is that I will give my daughter a gift basket filled with cloth pads, natural massage oil, the book "101 Ways to Celebrate Menstruation", and her own reuseable heating pack for cramps. I will also have a special dinner of her choosing to celebrate to keep the tradition going.


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## ShyingViolet (Oct 23, 2011)

My mom had "kinda sorta" talked to me about it a little bit, but we were totally unprepared for my first period. We'd only ever talked about it in a "someday" sort of way. A few weeks before my ninth birthday, I was sitting in my second-grade classroom when I thought I'd peed my pants. I had a wonderful female teacher who pulled me out of class and took me to the nurse's office. She gave me a half-hearted "you're becoming a woman now" speech, but I could tell she felt uncomfortable because I was so young. I started bawling and called my mom.

My mother came to pick me up as soon as I called her. She's a schoolteacher, and left in the middle of the day to come get me. She'd brought new underwear, pants, and pads. We stopped at the grocery store on the way home and got a whole mess of fresh fruit and a little dark chocolate. We melted the chocolate and dipped the fruit in it. We talked for hours, and she taught me how to use a sock full of rice heated up as a heating pad. I slept in her bed that night. I think she knew I was feeling scared of my body. I was such a kid, and I wanted to BE a kid. I didn't know anyone my age who had their period, and I felt left out and sad (and hormonal). My mom did a fantastic job of making me feel like this was nothing to be ashamed of, and that it's just the next step on the road of life. She bought me my first cloth pads (really cute ones) and used it as a lesson in sustainability.

I have a daughter of my own now, and I plan on handling things just the way my mother did. I might have the talk early if my experience is any indication of hers (I sure hope not!). I've never seen having a period as a bad thing, even if it's uncomfortable and inconvenient at times. It's a natural part of life, and I don't want DD to be afraid of it.

It was always just me and my mother growing up, and our cycles synced pretty much immediately. We still have "period parties" most months where we dip fruit in chocolate. I've been pregnant, nursing or postpartum for the past two years, so we haven't gotten the chance to celebrate in a while. Maybe I should stop at the grocery store and surprise her


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## LiaDBerk (May 11, 2012)

I don't remember my mother ever 'telling' me about my period, I just grew up 'knowing' about it. (When i got my period, i was a pre-teen who didn't want to make a big deal of anything and Mom must have known because when yelled from the bathroom, "Uh. Mom? i think i got my period," all she said was, "Okay. Do you need help?") And that's how i wanted to raise my daughter. She grew up - in the bathroom with me - and whenever she saw the "mess" in the toilet i would just say, "Oh. There's my period." When she was three-and-a-half she announced to her montessori class, "My mom put her period in the toilet today." So, I never really had a 'talk' about it with her.

However, I was practically forced to have a talk with her friend (whose mother hadn't yet talked to her) about menstrual cycles.

My daughter, her friend (we'll call her "Sarah"), and I were driving home from the mall. The girls were 9 years old and they were in the back seat having a silly-9-year-old-conversation. Then I heard Sarah say, "No. Really, she was 6 when she got pregnant." My daughter, Cressida, was emphatically denying the possibility of this. Sarah was insisting. Finally, I interjected, "Girls, girls. Someone who hasn't had their period can't get pregnant. And 6 year olds don't have their period." Silence. Then Sarah asks, "What's a period?" Cressida looked even more shocked than I felt.

"You don't know what your period is?" Cressida was aghast.

"No! What is it? What is it!?" Sarah was getting excited now.

Cressida, with a devilish look on her face began to tell Sarah, "It's when ---"

"No, no, Cressida. That is for Sarah's mom to explain to her. Sarah, when we get home, you can ask your mom."

Sarah pleaded, "Please tell me! i want to know!! tell me!"

Cressida looked at me and then looked at Sarah. It was like a slow motion movie playing out in my rear-view mirror as i watched Cressida lean over and begin to whisper in Sarah's ear. Mortified - and helpless from the front seat - I imagined the words that would come out of Cressida's mouth: "It's when blood...."

"STOP!" I shouted from the front seat. I took a deep breath and then began, "Okay. It's just when the uterine lining is sloughed and expelled through the cervix."

"Oh."

Sarah completely lost interest...back to silly 9-year-old-conversations. Sarah's mom was not happy with me. But my explanation was way better than what my daughter was about to tell her. And that's what i always try to remember as a parent: Better my child learn from ME than their friends.


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## grahamsmom98 (May 15, 2002)

*What a sexist contest. What about telling our SONS about menstruation???? *

Mom told me about menstruation (without any silly nicknames for it) when I was 12 or so. She didn't set me up for anything by mentioning cramps or complaints about it (other than I might have some or I might not). It was what it was. No big deal.

I was 16 when my period started. No big deal. I never had a cramp in my life (until labor). I never viewed my monthly periods as any kind of block to what I wanted to do. I decided to use tampons and not pads and Mom was fine with it. I think my Mom's way of explaining everything to me so simply was a great way of making this a simple, no-big-deal part of my life. I was never ashamed of this function and found girl friends that were (ashamed or embarrassed), quite weird.

My diet has always been a very balanced one and I never took supplements simply because I was menstruating.

We had no rituals (I view this as a bit stone age) and find giving this very natural process cutesy names and making it into a huge deal silly. MY OPINION.

Our son knows about menstruation and sees it as no big deal, as well. Nothing to be embarrassed about or a topic to be avoided. It's just another bodily function.

I have no interest in the contest prize (I don't use supplements), just wanted to say I think it's pretty sad that Mothering (and this Floradix company) would exclude boys from this subject. We need to educate ALL our children about this, not just the girls.


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## USAmma (Nov 29, 2001)

I have an 11 year old dd who is in puberty and I'm sure her period is coming right around the corner. As a nurse and just as a matter of fact person in general, I have educated both my girls to periods for their whole lives. It's just a part of being an adult woman. They have fetched tampons for me, and we have gone over the anatomy books. My 11 year old already has a little kit for when she starts her period. THey also have known about how babies are created and born for a very long time. My 11 year old has told me a few girls in her class have already started their periods. Just this week the school sent home the permission slip to talk about periods and such. I feel that it's a little late, but I suppose some girls don't have moms who will teach them those things and they need to learn about it somewhere. I suppose when the big day comes I will just support her through it. She's very private so I don't think she'll want people to make a big deal about it in the family.

(PS I too have no interest in the contest or anything-- just wanted to add to the conversation)


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## montessorikat (May 12, 2012)

I am sure my mom told me about my period before it happened to me, but I don't remember...I probably wasn't listening because it is hard to understand something conceptually when you have no practical application for real life. Anyway, on my 6th grade graduation day (the specific Montessori school I attended, ended at 6th grade), I called my mom into the bathroom with me, because I was sure I had pooped in my pants, as there was a thich brown gross discharge in my underwear. I was horrified and she reassured me that it was only blood and that I was having my first period! As she herself had undergone premature menapause she had no pad or tampon that I could use. I wrapped my underwear in toilet paper, changed out of my dress and into play clothes and played softball. Fastforward to a year later. I decided it was time I learned to wear tampons, as pads were sticky, bulky and gross. One evening when I was home by myself I decided to try putting a tampon in, I squatted down and tentatively inserted a tampon. Panicked and uncomfortable I got in the shower to help get it out, thinking that the water would make it slick and easier to remove. After the tampon became engorged under the shower, and awkwardly half in and half out, I cried with no pants on until my mom came home. She told me that it was not in as far as I imagined and showed me and actual tampon taken apart so I would understand that it was not as long/big as the applicator had led me to believe. Still not trusting that pulling on the tampon would not result in my lady parts being torn and injured. I had my mother pull out my tampon. Now thats trust. And attachement. And today, I wear OB tampons or other applicator free tampons, so I will always know just what I am getting myself into, from the get go.


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## hasya (Jun 27, 2010)

My mother told me that there will be blood and if I wipe and see more blood, to tell her or a female teacher if at school, to ask for money to cab it home. I didn't know the specifics about pregnancy. To be honest, I don't remember when I found out, but not too much after menarche, if that.

In my country, at least at that time and income level, unwed teen girl pregnancies were almost unheard of, because of its being a conservative society. I don't think it occurred to my mother to educate me about that before menarche.

I was at my aunt's place when it started. I called out to my cousin. My aunt came along to see what the matter was, and called my mother. She took me home with her. Menarche is celebrated by inviting married women (not sure if they have to be mothers) to bless the girl when it begins and also again, to eat lunch with her on the fourth day. For the first 3 days, she is asked to sleep separately, and is given very bland food and not allowed to shower. It was exactly 20 years ago, in 2 days. Typically, during menses, a girl/woman sat separately, didn't do any household work, but didn't get to touch any cloth that she didn't have to wash either. We didn't follow that after the very first time, in my family. But sometimes after becoming a mum, I have wondered if our culture was too quick to discard it, because I now bleed a lot more, and thus, tire easily. Would be great to have hubby do all the cooking and cleaning for those 3 days or more.

I am going to teach my daughter biology. Basics of all the systems, including this one. And tell her what happens and what it means, when she's about 9-10. I'll discuss pregnancy with her at around menarche or when she has a crush. Although I do not want my daughter getting intimate with a man before her wedding, I cannot ensure that it won't. I can only caution her against it and talk to her about waiting for the right time, with the right man. I don't want to think about it, but I have to, to protect her. And ardently hoping that she'll make safe choices.


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## agoodmama (Jun 30, 2008)

My mom never discussed it, even though we talked about every feeling we ever had. I don't remember body activities being much up for discussion in general. There was a lot of love, just not a lot of comfort with these things. We did have books though, that my parents kind of slyly left around. And my mom was always clear that she loved her body and cared for it, and that giving birth to us was a joy.

My daughter, age seven, has been in that bathroom with me so many times, she knows my monthly moon, or my period, very well. Sometimes we call it "mama's babies" because I told her that for a while before she was born, I had gotten in the habit of calling it "my girl." We like to use both official names and also pet names for intimate body talk.

My daughter has also, since she was in diapers herself, called my glad rags my "mama diaps." since she saw me washing them like I washed her diapers.

When she has her own, we will definitely make a celebration of it! And definitely get her a cup and some glad rags....I am thinking...a trip to the ocean. So we can stare at the waves and consider the connection our bodies have to the lunar cycle that runs the waves and to the waves...

We already talk about the vagina and how babies come out of there and how important it is to take extra special care of this wonderful part of her body.

I am also considering starting to include some more books on body activities between now and then, as well as in time, asking some Mommy friends to join in the discussion...She has one, but I think she likes to hear more than just our version of these topics.

I am definitely going to talk freely with my daughter about what happens with boys and with my sons about women's bodies as well. I want my sons to be comfortable with the whole process too!

MamaFlora


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## intime0 (Aug 17, 2007)

My mother didn't tell me a thing. So I didnt want it to be that way with my daughters. (I have five.)

I start early enough so that if they start early, there are no surprises. I buy them a book about puberty that answers all the questions. I highlight things and make notes to them. After they read it, we discuss it all. There are usually questions and answers and time spent talking. We revisit it often and talk about it whenever they want. I keep it upbeat and as something to look forward to.

By the time they start their periods, they are super excited to be entering into womanhood. Then we celebrate. Big sisters are allowed to join us, but no dads or brothers.

We go out to eat. I have a new purse for them. I give them some soft and cute cloth pads. (But they have a selection of paper pads to choose from too.) We celebrate. It's special to me...and it's special to them! (Usually we have more instructions and questions and talking. But mostly it's just about having fun that day.)


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## ariabrea (Mar 2, 2011)

My mother never talked to me about fertility. I remember getting my period right before going off to school (6th grade). She saw the evidence I had left in the trash, forced me to change my pants, stuck a huge pad in my undies, and sent me off to school without a comforting word. I was so afraid I did something wrong! I ended up going to the nurse at school, who was wonderful. She explained everything to me, and gave me plenty of pad and tampon samples so I could find something that suited me best. I'm still so thankful for her being there to help me at such a milestone in my life. I'm really hoping I can be more like that nurse - who held my hand while I cried and told me as many times as I had needed to hear it that I had done absolutely nothing wrong - when it comes time to educate my future daughters (and my current son, to a point) on menstruation. It's definitely something that needs to be talked about, not shied away from!


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## Poppyandsparrow (May 13, 2012)

Mum didn't discuss it much, but I had an older sister, so I knew it would happen and that it was no big deal. So when it happened for me, at 11, I didn't even tell my mum! About my third period in she remarked that she couldn't understand why we were going through so much toilet paper, and I opened up at that point. A trip to the store later, I was set with tampons and pads and locked myself in the bathroom so I could figure out how to put a tampon in. I DID NOT want any help. I also vaguely remember a 5th grade sex ed talk that gave me the biology version, and it was actually my GP that came in to talk to the class. There was a demonstration of a tampon in a cup of water that gave me the shivers, though at that time I didn't think there was any actual penetration in sex, just that the penis went by the vagina, and aimed. Heh.

If I have a daughter I'll talk frankly about it, make sure she has pads and supplies of all sorts to get comfortable with, and books, because as much as we would like to think our children want to hear it from us, sometimes that's just too mortifying to be dealt with. Maybe she'll want me to make a big deal out of it, maybe she'll want me to NEVER MENTION it again, but we'll see when that time comes.

With my sons, I hope to make sure they're aren't as mortified about periods as most men seem to be, and how to be sweet and comforting when a girl is on her period, like their dad is.


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## ihave7kids (Apr 21, 2012)

My mom talked to me about it for the first time when I was about 7. We had a nice, quiet talk in her bedroom (without my brothers) and she explained what

would happen and how its purpose was so that I would be able to have babies when I got older. She wanted to be sure I knew well in advance so that it couldn't take me by surprise and scare me. When i finally got my first period, almost 7 years later, I was more than ready. My mom then taught me how to chart my cycle so that I could pay close attention to my fertility signals. We often talked about how harmful artificial birth control and replacement hormones can be to a woman's cycle and overall health. She also talked openly with me about her changing cycles as she went through menopause, so that I could learn from her experiences what to expect. I am so glad that my mom did all this for me! Now I am the mom of 7 beautiful children, including 4 girls. My oldest daughter got her first period a few months ago. I am taking the same approach that my mom did because it worked so well...thanks, Mom!


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## evasasa (Jun 8, 2009)

My mom took me to the library , our favorite place and took out some books on the subject.I believe i was in 5th grade. It was all very scientific an basic. Wiht my girls, I have had a very spiritual and open relationship as far as our bodies and nature. They saw their brother born at home and understood the immense connection between the a woman's body and lifesince an early age. My oldest is now 9 and my middle 7 and their borther is now 4 and we are expecting a sister in August. They have noticed that mommy no longer needed pads. So it semed like a good time to discuss why. I explained to them that all girls are born with a supply of tiny little eggs stored in our ovaries. Our bodies cannot use those eggs to create a baby until we are women. There are many signs that we are entering womanhood and the strongest is when our uterus sheds like a snake shedding old skin. The uterus sheds one egg and its lining which made up of lots of red bloodcells. This way each month the egg comes into the womb and and then all the cells clean out so thatsome day when they are grown and married and ready to have a baby, the uterus will always be clean and will have had lots of practice recieiving an egg from the ovaries. I was actually asked to speak at our local Islamic School to 4th-5th and 6th graders about the female changes, and was so surprised by how many moms just were afraid to discuss anyof this with their girls. A strong discomfort, and fearof having the conversation. I aproached them with such a excited attitude and one of awe at the body's wisdom. And ever since then, I have been asked back because the girls have all walked away with an excited feeling about the changes in their bodies rather than a fear. And even more importantly a respect for all their body can do. That is what I share with mygirls sense of awe and respect for womanhood and our bodies. Which hopefully they will carry throughout their lives and pass on to their girls.


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## mleawicks (Feb 4, 2012)

In sex ed class at school they told us in 4 and 5 grade. I heard about it from a boy in about 1 or 2 grade on my swing set. My mom didn't have hers anymore so I just didn't see the pads around and ask either. I wish that someone had given me more info. Like just because you don't have anything over night does not mean it's over. I thought it was and had a few messes at school. Luckily it stayed between legs so know one saw it. But the idea that I could have been soooo embarrassed by it was awful. Please make sure your girls know that they should wear a pad even if they get nothing over night. Until the pad is clean during the day. Please Please please do tell them. save them form what I went thro. I told my mom I was mad at Eve. It was all her fault. LOL I will make sure if this kid I will have anytime now is a girl, that she knows more then I did, way before.


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## MayasMama88 (Jul 15, 2010)

My mom talked to me about it a little bit, but I didn't really know what to expect. I started wearing pads (oddly enough) a few days before I ever got my period for the first time, and when I noticed I had it, there was so little blood that I wasn't sure if that was exactly what it was... but I said it was anyway, lol! My mom was so happy for me when it happened, and I was actually shaking with excitement (and a little confusion as to what - exactly - this meant).

From that experience, I have vowed to educate my daughter as well as I can on her body, and of the cycles that she will experience. She is 2.5 years old, and she knows when I'm on my period. She will get my cloth pads for me when we're in the bathroom together (and even stuff one in her underwear on occasion), and because we shower together she sees when I bleed and she is not afraid of it. She actually said, "Maya get period too!" And I had to chuckle a little and tell her that she will get her period, just not for quite awhile, to which she responded with a simple "Yeah!!".

I will celebrate with her in whatever way she feels appropriate for her, but I have a feeling a joyful ritual in nature will be involved!


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## jewel1288 (May 6, 2011)

Like many other commenters, my mom didn't tell me anything about my period either. I remember starting my period while we were on vacation visiting family. I had the heaviest flow and it was incredibly uncomfortable. I literally felt sick and had no appetite for the flavor rich foods we were eating. When I went to the bathroom to find that I had started my period, I felt so embarrassed and I didn't tell anyone. I just stuffed my panties with toilet paper. How ineffective. I truly don't know how leakage didn't occur! Even to this day, my mom doesn't like to talk about going to the bathroom; it just makes her uncomfortable for some reason. I, on the other hand talk about poop and my cycle and nipples like it's no big deal. I try to keep things to a minimum for her sake, but I do wish she hadn't dropped the ball with my sister and I when it came to things like our period, sexuality, shaving our legs, wearing a bra, and all things feminine.

I plan to talk openly and honesty with my daughter about her period and everything else that surrounds being a woman. I never want her to feel ashamed or embarrassed, like I did. I also want her to know she can talk with me about any of those things without fear of me shutting down her concerns or questions. I think that femininity is something to be celebrated and embraced, not afraid of. I also plan to share the joy of using cloth pads with my daughter. I just began using them and I love them. My LO is a cloth diaper baby, so it makes me even more excited to also share cloth pads with her. The fewer chemicals down there, the better!  I think cycle beads are an excellent idea too, so I plan to be sharing them with my daughter when she begins her period.


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## NubiaEarth (Sep 1, 2008)

I was a "late bloomer", so by the time my 13th birthday came and went and my first period had yet to arrive, my older sister was already away at college, and my mother was pregnant with my youngest brother. No one had ever had "he talk" with me, and from what I had heard from my girlfiends I had decided I was better off without it!

As the time drew closer to my 14th brithday and still no monthly visitor, I became worried... What is wrong with me? Why wasn't everyting happening as they said it would in health class? I began to search on my own. There wasn't any Google or Ask.com back then, so I sought answers in Judy Blume novels, encyclopedias and thick health text books, until I stumbled across a weathered copy of Ina May Gaskin's "Spiritual Midwifery" on my moms bookshelf.

I fell in love with that book and the beautiful stories that were woven into each page with respect and admiration. That book showed me myself. It opened my eyes to the beautiful vessels of life that we women are. That summer, a month and a half shy of my 14th birthday, on a humid night adorned with a full moon, my cycle started. I was elated, not apprehensive. Proud, not petrified.

My mother showed indiference when I told her my exciting news, but I could not be dismayed... I knew the power and the purpose behind this blood, and what it would mean for my future.

When I gave birth to my first child, my only daughter, I made a promise when I looked into her eyes; I will arm you with knowledge and information so that you may know yourself, know what to expect, and embrace and love who you are.

Her 10th birthday is next month and we have already had "the talk:, it is a part of our regular conversations. I am a childbirth educator, doula and an aspiring midwife, and the facts of life are everyday occurences that I don't hide from my daughter, I share with her openly and honestly, so that she may know the wisdom that we women carry in our abilities to bring forth life!


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## Dolphin4176 (Apr 2, 2011)

I don't remember my mom ever sitting me down and telling me about my period. I just always knew because we always talked openly. She didn't hide it from us and answered questions when we asked (I have a younger sister). I do remember starting my first time on vacation with my DAD! We were at my grandparents and my grandmother was not the kind of woman you go to to ask for pads from! I had brought a few with me for a "just in case" and I was glad I did. I still had to end up telling my dad because there weren't enough pads. He actually teared up! We now have a son and a daughter. My son is 18 and I never hid it from him. I figured he needed to know just as much as a girl did. Now he has no problem walking into a store and buying pads for a girlfriend or even me if needed. Our daughter is only 4 but she already knows that mommy bleeds every month. I don't hide it from her (how could I when she is my little shower...even in the bathroom. We also usually shower together other than when I'm on my period). I've tried telling her that one day she will bleed too but she doesn't quite grasp the concept! I will continue to be open about it and answer any questions she has.


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## CrysHarding85 (Apr 28, 2012)

My mother told me at a very young age of how I would develop. We had a very short discussion on periods. I was a little excited to mature. When I first started my cycle I was nervous, was home alone and Mom was at work. I called her and she walked me through what I needed to know.

When it comes time for me to explain to my daughter her menstrual cycle I will do my best to explain everything she needs to know. I am so pumped to be able to share my knowledge with her. I will also tell her that I am always going to be there for her whenever she has questions about her period or any other womanly issues. I would like to be more like a friend than a mom.


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## phathui5 (Jan 8, 2002)

I don't remember my mom ever talking to my about what would happen when my period started. What I do remember is a week in the fifth grade where the nurse came in and talked to us about puberty and hygiene. What stood out the most was the nurse saying that when you wear deodorant, you need to wash your armpits before you put more on the next time, you can't just layer it and expect it to work.

Later, in high school health class, the teacher gave out a chart about different methods of birth control and I was fascinated by the idea of natural family planning. I had no idea that there were days of the month where you would get pregnant and days where you wouldn't. That was when I started charting my cycle.


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## QuirkyMama (Mar 4, 2010)

The first time I got my period, I was a month away from turning 12; it was my sixth grade Field Day, and I was sent to school in white cotton shorts.

I'd had enough education (in school and at home) to know what was happening; all of us sixth grade girls were given "emergency kits" in health class, which we stashed under our beds with a mix of wonder, anticipation, and faint horror. I don't remember being overjoyed; I do remember I did NOT want my father to find out, and of course my mother told him as soon as he came home from work.

The part that makes me laugh, in retrospect, was that "to celebrate," my mother took me to the diner, and all I felt like eating was potato salad.


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## TracyGladRags (Feb 16, 2011)

My knowledge of periods, before mine started, was limited to the word "period" and one very vague, uncomfortable afternoon in the 4th grade where the girls were separated, watched a video, and then tore apart the sample tampons and pads we were given. So when mine began around the age of 11, I was still under the impression that it was called a period because it left a bloodstain the size of a large punctuation mark of the same name in your undies. Imagine my surprise, after affixing a pantyliner found in the bottom drawer in the bathroom (my sister had already started a few years earlier), that a light days liner was wholly insufficient for the job!

I spent about 10 years being weirdly embarrassed about my period. I had really long, heavy flow, never talked to anyone about it -- save the occasional whispered "do you have a pad?" to a dear friend at a school -- and was generally exceptionally uncomfortable for about one week out of the month. Total bummer. Eventually, I learned about reusables and -- like they do for many of us! -- they changed my life.

Over the years of reusables, my perspective toward my body has totally changed. As one of my Facebook friends commented recently, "yes, it can come with cramps and other symptoms, but my body is a freaking wonderland of femininity and beauty and magic." Hear, hear.

I don't have a daughter, but I have a young niece, and as she grows up I hope to be one of many nurturing female voices in her life that reinforces positive feelings about her body. I don't intend to hide anything from her about what being a "grown up" means, and obviously my career will be an easy conversation-starter as far as periods go! And she'll grow up with a mother who uses cloth pads, too. My goal with anyone, no matter their age, is to speak honestly and frankly and create safe spaces for questions and conversations!


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## minkajane (Jun 5, 2005)

My mom didn't tell me anything about my period. She didn't even have pads in the house even though she had two puberty-aged daughters (she'd had a hysterectomy). I got my first period on the first day of 8th grade at a party. The only thing we had in the house was pantyliners and toilet paper, so that's what I used until she figured out I'd gotten it. One night, she got me out of bed, took me in the bathroom, shut the door, and asked me in a whisper if I'd gotten my period. I was mortified. She made everything seem like the most embarrassing thing that could ever happen to you. I once got grounded for asking her in front of my dad and brother if she could pick me up some pads at the store.

I want to do things totally different with my daughter. I'm going to have a multitude of products available for her well before she needs them, so she will be familiar with them. I'm also going to explain to her exactly what to expect and make sure she understands that it's nothing to be embarrassed of. It's something that happens to half the population once a month for most of their lives - why should we be embarrassed? I'm also going to have a menarche party for her, to celebrate her entrance into womanhood.


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## JenniO11 (Dec 7, 2011)

This contest is now closed! Thank you to everyone that entered - we loved hearing your stories! Whether your own mothers did or didn't talk about your period, it seems like there's one thing in common: we'll all be open with our daughters when it comes time for them to cross over to womanhood!

We'll be announcing the winner in a few days!


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## JenniO11 (Dec 7, 2011)

Congratulations *NubiaEarth* - you won! Look for a PM from me in your inbox!

Thanks to everyone else who participated!


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## TracyGladRags (Feb 16, 2011)

Congrats, NubiaEarth! Your story is beautiful


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