# What age is "Preteen"



## chkpea (Oct 1, 2003)

My son is turning 9 in a few weeks - and I still think of him as a child, but I read somewhere that ages 9-12 is preteen. So I went on the Pre-teen/Teen board here and cannot relate with any of it. I kinda think they should separate the preteen and teen board.


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## nextcommercial (Nov 8, 2005)

I consider preteen to be between 10-12.

And, I agree... pre-teen and teens are a whole different world.


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## dogretro (Jun 17, 2008)

I think of pre-teen to be 11&12, maybe 10. Culturally, I have heard of tweenage beginning at 8 or 9.


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## meemee (Mar 30, 2005)

dd is 10. i consider her a tween and i find actually a lot of similarities with the teen board. i didnt at 9 so much.

i think there's quite a bit of difference between girl tween issues and boy tween issues at that age. i see it in dd's class. the boys are not so 'teenish' as the girls are.

so i think around 9 or 10 you start to see the difference between the boys and girls.


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## Adaline'sMama (Apr 16, 2010)

I dont have a kiddo that old, but I have three younger sisters and one sister in law. I consider "pre teen" to be 9-12. But, I supposed it depends on each different girl, what their peers are like, and what is going on with their body.


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## One_Girl (Feb 8, 2008)

I think about 8-12 but it also depends on the child
Around the time my dd turned 8 I started gravitating to the preteen/teen board because some of the issues were relevant and the things people wrote helped me with my dd.


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## zebra15 (Oct 2, 2009)

My DS just turned 12 and is just starting to show some 'pre teen' issues. Boys and girls are totally different on this issue. Most girls have 'drama', boys don't. Drama creates 'tween' things. Don't get me wrong, my kid is usually happy with his lego's and swim team (and library card) most days but there is a bit of attitude and eye rolling starting to come forward.

I work with kids and there is a vast difference starting about 3rd grade. Girls can be 'tweens' around 8 or 9, boys can make it Jr High with no 'tween' in them.


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## Mirzam (Sep 9, 2002)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *zebra15*
> 
> My DS just turned 12 and is just starting to show some 'pre teen' issues. Boys and girls are totally different on this issue. Most girls have 'drama', boys don't. Drama creates 'tween' things. Don't get me wrong, my kid is usually happy with his lego's and swim team (and library card) most days but there is a bit of attitude and eye rolling starting to come forward.
> 
> I work with kids and there is a vast difference starting about 3rd grade. Girls can be 'tweens' around 8 or 9, boys can make it Jr High with no 'tween' in them.


My 12 year old DS doesn't have much tween in him! He seems to get through life with little drama, doing his thing, which in his case is soccer, and Minecraft.


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## revolting (Sep 10, 2010)

It depends on the child. I'd think of an 8 year old girl going through puberty as a tween, but not a boy who hadn't gone through puberty.


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## 4evermom (Feb 3, 2005)

Just use whichever forum fits the issues... My ds didn't have any tween issues at 9 or even 10. But some kids do and the tween/teen forum might be a good place for advice from parents that have been there with older kids.


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## kayleesmom (Dec 16, 2004)

Wow 8 or 9 is now a tween where has the time went.


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## JollyGG (Oct 1, 2008)

Supposedly my son is a pre teen. He's nine. However, he is a child and I refuse to call him a preteen because I consider it a made up marketing word that wants my baby to grow up way too fast.


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## SunRise (Apr 18, 2005)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *dogretro*
> 
> I think of pre-teen to be 11&12, maybe 10. Culturally, I have heard of tweenage beginning at 8 or 9.


This is my thinking too. My 10 year old isnt pre-teen, he just celebrated double digits thats it, no tween in him!


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## Storm Bride (Mar 2, 2005)

I used to think of preteen as 11 or 12. I've changed my mind. I think it's subjective, to some degree. DD1 is 9, and she's definitely a pre-teen. DS1 said it well at dinner one night, when he looked at me and mouthed "she's so teenage!".


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## Natalya (Jun 18, 2004)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *zebra15*
> 
> I work with kids and there is a vast difference starting about 3rd grade. Girls can be 'tweens' around 8 or 9, boys can make it Jr High with no 'tween' in them.


Phew. I am getting really nervous about adolescence. However, my ds has always been slow to mature, so I'm betting (hoping) he stays a kid a little bit longer.


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## Drummer's Wife (Jun 5, 2005)

My DD is 11 and definitely a "preteen". She's been once since like 8 or 9, I swear. She's almost teen like now at 11.5 and in middle school. *sigh*. That said, my oldest DS is 9 and I don't think of him as a preteen quite yet. Maybe boys are different, though. I feel like he's still a little boy, in many ways.

I also agree that there is a huge difference in preteen and teen, and it would be nice to have forums to represent that. But, we've asked for a "preschool" aged forum for years, as well, because toddler to childhood seems like a huge leap considering the typical discussions taking place.


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## meemee (Mar 30, 2005)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Storm Bride*
> 
> I used to think of preteen as 11 or 12. I've changed my mind. I think it's subjective, to some degree. DD1 is 9, and she's definitely a pre-teen. DS1 said it well at dinner one night, when he looked at me and mouthed "she's so teenage!".


Louise Ames Bates has a book "Your 10 to 14 year old". I of course started reading the 10 year old first. nope. that was kinda sorta dd last year. the calm before the storm. at 10 all her issues are more of a 11 year old from the book. she has always though been that way. she hits the phases early.

thankfully she has not yet started her periods. but i think its getting there so i now send her everywhere prepared.


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## tiqa (Feb 8, 2012)

We're nowhere near that stage yet, but looking back, I can see myself having shifts halfway through 6th grade (so, 11.5 years) and then again at the end of 8th grade (at newly 14). For me, those years make sense... 11-13 being tween, 14 and up being teen. (Though at 17 I was young adult, until about 21.5... I know a lot of other 17 year olds weren't in that stage for a while. Then I went through another phase from 21.5 to about 27.5... I'm now 29.)

I do think it's largely a marketing thing. I know some kids are going through puberty earlier, but honestly, my son at 5.5 is just starting to be "childlike" - changing his teeth and acting more grown. I can't imgaine that in 2.5 years he'll suddenly be a tween. No way. It's not like I'm in *denial* but it just doesn't seem logical or natural. I'm not sure if homeschooling and no TV will delay him beyond his peers. I don't want to delay him on PURPOSE (my parents definitely tried to hold me back for a while, and I did not appreciate it...) but I also don't want him to be pushed in the wrong direction prematurely because he thinks he "should" be more grown up than he is. I can definitely see his younger DD being more "tweeny" sooner than him, but hopefully even she won't be that premature about it.


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## Vermillion (Mar 12, 2005)

My oldest DS is 10.5 and is just now straddling the line between childhood and pre-teen.


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