# How does your toddler react to a parent crying?



## Nik's Mommy (Nov 28, 2002)

I'm just curious how our little one reacts... if they even notice at all.
I had a bit of a "meltdown" last weekend. (A combination of fatigue, hormones, and frustration with mine and dh's present employment situation). I sat on my kitchen floor and just let it all out.







My ds was colouring around the corner, and came over to show me his picture. The second he saw me he dropped to the floor and started bawling, too. Well, I just felt so bad that my little selfish crying session had caused my little guy to get so upset.









Last night we received some very sad news about a family member. (If you want details, I posted last night in Grief and Loss .) This time my dh was crying. My ds didn't even seem to notice. He just came up to him and started to play with dh like he normally does every night. (Ds tries to tickle dh, dh pretends to laugh, etc etc). I tried to explain to ds that daddy was sad and he needed a hug. Ds didn't understand, though.

I found it very interesting to see ds' different reactions to this emotion.

How does your toddler react? Are girls more intuitive than boys? I wonder???


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## mamalisa (Sep 24, 2002)

My ds is a little sweetheart. He hates when anyone is sad, scared or hurt. I was actually crying yesterday and he came over and "ate" my tears, exactly how I "eat' his to make me all "bebber now".







He also knew I was upset with dh because he said, "dada, oh maaaann". I tried really hard(it wasn't easy) to explain that sometimes we all make each other sad and that I would talk to daddy about being sad later, just like we do when he's sad. I also made sure he saw me and dh make up this morning. We didn't really, but it looked good







: .

One of his little friends got scared of fireworks at a baseball game Friday night and he's still talking about how, "Evie scared of booms, poor Evie, no more baseball games with me".

He really gets this from me, I can't let someone cry alone, I'll sit down and cry right along with you. I'm not sure how he would react to dh crying, I would like to think it would be the same.


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## Potty Diva (Jun 18, 2003)

DD is pretty sensitive to others crying. She cries herself(pretending of course) when Snow White cries.

She has witnessed me crying a few times, and comes over and hugs my head. She also strokes my faces, and says "it's ok baby"(it's what I say to her when she cries). Of course this touches my heart, and usually takes my mind of my tears









She does the same when she has seen DH cry.


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## dallaschildren (Jun 14, 2003)

My son cries too when he sees either of us crying. He hugs us and gives us a kiss and says, " you crying? why are you crying?". He is going to be my sensitive one. My husband and in-laws are all boo-hooers. They will cry (my FIL too) at the drop of a hat, so I see where my husband gets his emotional side. It's pretty cool to see my husband show his emotions like that. My father's generation comes from the long line of "be a man...men don't cry" mentality. I am proud to see my son has a sensitive side.


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## Stacymom (Jul 7, 2002)

I had a major mommy-meltdown the other day that ended up with me sobbing on the couch when I got a summons to court for attending traffic school but never paying for it, even though I had, etc... (Since have found out that there were two people with my exact name that attended traffic school that day, and I paid and she didn't.







: ) Anyway...

Dd was way concerned- her eyes were all big and she didn't know what to do. She came up and started patting me on the back, and saying "No cryin', mommy." Very sweet. She is very in tune any time anyone is crying. We were at the Drs office the other day and she heard a little baby crying and was truly distressed. We heard about the baby crying all the way home.


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## chie96 (Apr 2, 2003)

My Dd (21 mos) has seen me cry twice in the past few weeks







(I am 7 1/2 weeks pg and _very_ emotional). Both times she got a look of great concern on her little face and asked, "Mama cy-ing? Mama tad (sad)," and then kissed my face. It was so sweet - she is such a loving child. I know it bothered her to see her Mama cry and I really tried to distract her while I straightened myself up.


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## MelKnee (Dec 5, 2001)

I broke down and cried a couple of months ago because of my ds's medical problems. He had just turned two. I cried for about five minutes. He hugged me while I cried. For days after that, he was very co-operative. I had to ask him to do something only once and he just did it. I think he knew I really needed a break.


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## Nik's Mommy (Nov 28, 2002)

Wow! So many of you have such loving and caring little children. How wonderful.


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## Heavenly (Nov 21, 2001)

My DS is 29 months old. When I cry my DS will come over and hug and kiss me and say "mommy, be fine. Be fine, mommy" Then he will usually go and pick his favorite toy and bring it to me!


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## Gemini (Apr 9, 2003)

My dd will say "Mommy, don't be sad, be happy!" Or lately it's been "Why are you sad?"

She's so smart and a little caretaker at times.


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## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

My ds is 14 months old and when I have a melt-down he crawls into my lap and just leans on me.

it's like he knows I need a little extra love and he gives it freely! The funny thing is he knows the difference between sad crying and "hormonal i'm pregnant crying". When I'm just blubbery over a tv commercial he jsutu looks at me.....but when I really need him he is there!

its amazing to me how much they know at such a young age.

i read your post in grief and loss....sounds like you need those extra hugs right now..and those little boys need more hugs than i think anyone can give.... i'm so sorry for your loss...these things never makes sense.


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## steph (Dec 5, 2001)

dd will usually come up to me very concerned, rest her head on me and stroke or pat my back or shoulder. she's also very cooperative afterwards - even if it's something she might rebel about... she knows i need all the help i can get!


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## tara (Jan 29, 2002)

Jackson has had cause to see me cry a few times recently. At first, he laughs hesitantly, like he thinks I'm laughing but he isn't sure. When I tell him I'm not laughing, I'm sad and I'm crying, he gives me a hug and a kiss... I feel so blessed to have such a tenderheart child...


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## ksmeadowlark (Jun 17, 2002)

So far my DS just laughs when I cry. I don't think he understands that mommies can be sad too, yet...


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## Parker'smommy (Sep 12, 2002)

The few times Parker has seen me cry, he has laughed at me. I think that he thinks that I am laughing, not crying. He is just 16 months old so I am sure that he will learn what crying and sadness is one day..too bad. I hope he will grow up into a sensitive little man like some of you have described your sons. I dont believe in all that macho, no crying cuz I'm a man crap!!!


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## kindmomma (Sep 18, 2002)

" I lub you momma, you feel better soon"
Sadly DD has seen me cry quite a few times recently. She is so concerned and tries so hard to make it better, and really she does!
I love that my daughter, even at 2 1/2 can understand emotion enough to know that love and compassion usually makes tears stop, even for mommy.


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