# Your hospital experience- did they push circ?



## newsolarmomma2 (Jan 6, 2011)

The hospital I had my son at last year, NEVER even asked if I wanted DS to be circed!

I was so worried that something would happen, and he would get circed accidentally, but I had nothing to worry about, as it wasn't even offered.

Let me say it again-
NO ONE EVER OFFERED CIRC! Not once, not a single doc or nurse even brought it up. it was like circ was not even offered! PRETTY COOL!!!









Is this common? This was San Diego, but the hospital is NOT crunchy at all, it's a high risk, level 3 NICU specialty place.

What was your experience?????


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## Sarah (Nov 20, 2001)

I birthed all 4 children at the same hospital. We were always asked upon admission before the sex of the baby was known, and when the baby was male- we were asked repeatedly- but when they got the no answer- the reactions were always very positive... but somehow our desire was never communicated to the next shift- and we'd be asked again and again. I see that as an implied endorsement and I think hospitals need to stop soliciting for non-indicated surgery. What happened with baby Mario in Miami (circumcised intentionally by a Dr. in the NICU after his mom refused repeatedly) is an example of how wrong that can go. My last baby was female, but when the LC came to visit me, we somehow got on the subject of circumcision and she was so happy that I had not circumcised my sons and said that she deals with a lot of issues because of circumcision.


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## CallMeMommy (Jun 15, 2005)

I've only had 1 in the hospital, and he was a preemie. They certainly didn't ask right after the birth, but I honestly don't remember them bringing it up before discharge either. If anything they told us to ask our family doctor after discharge, but I wasn't intending on having it done so I don't think I paid any attention.


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## Llyra (Jan 16, 2005)

I was asked exactly three times. The first time was at the OBs office, late in the pregnancy, where she offered printed information (which basically laid out the AAP's official position at the time.) She just said, "this is something you might want to look into," and I said, "we've decided not to," and her reaction was extremely, enthusiastically positive.

The second time was when I arrived at the hospital. They asked a bunch of questions, and entered my answers in their computer. The one about circumcision was sandwiched between "do you have any serious allergies, especially to meds" and "do you have any special dietary requirements." I said no to the circumcision question. The nurse didn't react at all; she just entered the answer along with all the other ones I gave.

The third time I was asked was the day after the birth, when a representative from our ped practice visited to examine the babies. The doc mentioned that if I wanted to circ, he would be the one who would do it, and I said no thanks, we've decided not to, and he said, okay well let me give you this information about the care of the intact penis-- very accurate information, I might add, that told me to leave the penis completely alone, other than normal bathing, and asserted that the foreskin shouldn't be retracted by anyone.

So all in all, our experience was overwhelmingly positive. I was very impressed with the accuracy of the info everybody offered, and the positive attitude everybody had about my wishes.


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## Babina's Mommy (Dec 27, 2008)

I had my last two babies, both boys at the same hospital. The first time I think I was asked once, we said no, and that was that....I believe. This last time (my baby is only 2 weeks old right now) my experience was similar to Sarah's above. We were asked a lot. I had a C-section and was asked by the nurse who was helping to prep me. She asked about breastfeeding. She said I made her happy since she loves when moms say they will not circumcise and breastfeed as opposed to moms who say they are bottle feeding and circumcising. I think I was asked a few times by the doctors who came into my room several times a day...not my ob, and not the pediatrician but the other drs who I actually didn't know, who checks over you and baby. One dr was very young and didn't seem to like my answer and was talking about the benefits of circumcising, which I didn't like. He mentioned how I'd have to do this extra cleaning on him, that in Africa they're doing it because of STDs, etc. I just sat there and didn't say much. I didn't argue because probably me being so tired and my brain was kind of fried. I just let him do his little spiel and leave. I think I want to complain to the hospital about the whole thing. I felt like they didn't think I was educated to make such a decision, that my decision was no good whereas needless to say I was a little offended by the whole thing. And why was I asked so many times this time, as opposed to the first time which was less than two years ago?? Circumcision is one of my worst nightmares and here they are asking me over and over...ugh...but like mentioned above, it could be just lack of communication between staff because I was asked other things over and over...


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## Evandy (Jul 10, 2008)

hi!


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## rebecca_n (Nov 1, 2010)

we were asked alot at the hospital! we already had a non baby friendly birth with mom baby seoeration ect  every time the pediatrician came in he would say he was just xhexking to see how his circ was healing and when we repeated we hadn't/weren't circing hewould say "i'm ok with that" then come back and say the same thing again and again. this same doc really undermined our nursing experience too

-nak


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## Mamja (May 23, 2007)

Nope, not at all. In the OB's office they asked just for our files. The NP was surprised, but probably because she is English and we are in a very pro-circ area, so we are rare. In the hospital, most people were VERY supportive. It was great! No pressure at all!


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## Belia (Dec 22, 2007)

It's been a couple of years now, but I think we were only asked once.... maybe twice. Our little guy was in the NICU for a few days, so maybe a day or two from release they said something about scheduling the circ before we left, and we said no thanks, and that was it. Maybe a different person asked on that last day just as a "dot your I's, cross your T's, did we forget anything" type of thing.

But definitely no pressure or judgement or anything. It was fine. And while we live in an urban area, the hospital where we birthed was pretty conservative.


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## CookAMH (Jun 2, 2008)

Our hosp had a level III NICU as well, Pittsburgh. No comment was made, it was in our birth plan. He was with us the whole time and they never came in to ask about it. They were also cool with the other things we declined.


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## shantimama (Mar 11, 2002)

No, in fact with my ds the doctor handed me a pamphlet while I was still pregnant saying that circumcision is not medically recommended and we would have to make a special request and pay for the procedure if we wanted it. We live in Canada so don't pay for medically necessary procedures. I had midwives for my other pregnancies and it wasn't even mentioned.


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## A&A (Apr 5, 2004)

The ped. pushed it, but no one else.


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## mjg013 (Jul 29, 2008)

Well, they never asked with mine but that was because I told them no circumcision several times before we got to that point. I had it written in red on my file. With my first boy, I called my pediatrician ahead of time to discuss it. We talked about it for about an hour on the phone. He was my ped for years with my other 4. I had a weird birth experience with my first son (my 5th child). The midwife was unhappy with my insisting I was in labor when she didn't think I was, then I gave birth so quickly that she almost didn't catch him. I was then put into a room and ignored the rest of the night. I had him around 1am and at 7 I got up and bathed him and dressed him and showered and dressed myself so at 8 when my pediatrician came in I told him I was ready to leave and the only mention of circumcision was his saying, well, since I know you aren't circumcising I'll get his discharge papers ready. With my other two sons I had same pediatrician and he never brought it up because he knows me too well.

That said, I was billed for a circumcision with my first son by the hospital. I called and told them to take it off because my son was not circumcised and they actually asked me if I was sure and then told me that they could just keep it on there and not bill me when I did bring him in to be circumcised and then I went off on a major rant and they took care of it.


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## ElliesMomma (Sep 21, 2006)

yes, i was "offered" at 7 am, following a 1 am delivery. this was after i had my file marked "do not circumcise."


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## PNWmama (Sep 2, 2006)

Nope, never asked even once! yay!


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## gypsymama2008 (Apr 23, 2008)

When I had my DD (no, no one pushed circumcision) but I did have a nurse in the maternity ward tell me it would be quicker for us to get out because we had a girl and we didn't have to "wait for her to be circumcised." This made me really sad that she just assumed we would circ, especially since we're in the Pacific Northwest which is supposed to be foreskin friendly.


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## hakunangovi (Feb 15, 2002)

I would make sure I complained - that type of conduct by a doctor is totaly unacceptable. I really hope you do - and soon while memories are stll fresh. Good for you!!

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Babina's Mommy*
> 
> One dr was very young and didn't seem to like my answer and was talking about the benefits of circumcising, which I didn't like. He mentioned how I'd have to do this extra cleaning on him, that in Africa they're doing it because of STDs, etc. I just sat there and didn't say much. I didn't argue because probably me being so tired and my brain was kind of fried. I just let him do his little spiel and leave. I think I want to complain to the hospital about the whole thing. I felt like they didn't think I was educated to make such a decision, that my decision was no good whereas needless to say I was a little offended by the whole thing.


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## Babina's Mommy (Dec 27, 2008)

Exactly. And for the most part I do like the hospital. Compared to others. They do waterbirths, they do a doula program, they will help you birth naturally if that's what you want through all different techniques, they are pro-breastfeeding and I had what they consider a "gentle c-section" and had the baby skin to skin right after he came out. It just seems like I would expect more from them. Though the first time I had a baby there (but second child), I co-slept the entire time and no one said anything, and most nurses said nothing this time, but once nurse told me not to sleep with him in the bed because he might fall out. Wish I had something clever to come back with then...and needless to say he could not have fallen out...but anyway, yes, back to circumcisions...terrible...the thought of my son(s) having that done gives me nightmares, let alone being asked nonstop...the hospital sends out a questionaire on your experience in their hospital so I will be sure to include my experience there as well...


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## eclipse (Mar 13, 2003)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *newsolarmomma2*
> 
> The hospital I had my son at last year, NEVER even asked if I wanted DS to be circed!
> 
> ...


Which San Diego Hospital was it? I delivered DS1 at Mary Birch 10 years ago and got asked a bunch of times. It was annoying. No one tried to talk me into it, but I had it in all the paperwork - not only that I filled out with my OB, but that I filled out upon admission - and it seemed ridiculous that they kept asking me. The weirdest part was that they said that if we wanted it done we'd have to make an appoitnment after we left the hospital, so it wasn't even like they wanted to whisk him off to do it or anything. There were a lot of bad experiences I had at that hospital during that delivery, though. Two years later I delivered DD there and it was a totally different experience and was great (aside from one obnoxious nurse). Obviously I didn't have the circ issue with her, though.

I delivered DS2 5 years after DS1 at a different hospital (for the OP, Mercy Hospital in Hillcrest) and was never once asked about it. I don't know if it was a difference in the hospital, that things had changed in the 5 years between the boys, because I was a birth center transfer (sort of - he was preterm, so I never made it to the birth center), or (and this is the one I personally think it was) that for DS1's birth I had private insurance and for DS2 I was on state insurance (which does not pay for routine circs)


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## SoCaliMommy (Jun 11, 2004)

Nope not once. My son was born almost 5years ago. Kaiser in Harbor City,California


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## broodymama (May 3, 2004)

DS1 was born in a small hospital in southeast GA in 2004. I refused circumcision when I was filling out my admission paperwork and my nurse was delighted, ripping up the circ consent form and noting that in my chart and saying she wished she had seen one before her sons were born because she would have left them intact if she had.

After he was born I was asked 2 times, once by a CNM in the practice that I saw and once by a ped, if I wanted him circumcised.


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## brant31 (Jan 11, 2009)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *mjg013*
> 
> That said, I was billed for a circumcision with my first son by the hospital. I called and told them to take it off because my son was not circumcised and they actually asked me if I was sure and then told me that they could just keep it on there and not bill me when I did bring him in to be circumcised


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## sapphire_chan (May 2, 2005)

Since I have a girl, I don't know how the hospital would've been.

But, beforehand, this worker from the financial office at my OB was freakishly concerned with making sure I knew that my insurance wouldn't pay if one sort of person did it instead of another sort of person. (I don't remember now..) She just kept on and on and on about it even after I gave up on explaining that I wouldn't be doing it anyway and just repeated the information she was giving.


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## sapphire_chan (May 2, 2005)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *rebecca_n*
> 
> we were asked alot at the hospital! we already had a non baby friendly birth with mom baby seoeration ect  every time the pediatrician came in he would say he was just xhexking to see how his circ was healing and when we repeated we hadn't/weren't circing hewould say "i'm ok with that" then come back and say the same thing again and again. this same doc really undermined our nursing experience too
> 
> -nak


I don't know what can be done about it, but I bet that doctor is molesting babies. Or, even if he never touches them inappropriately, he's having inappropriate thoughts as he does so.


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## CrazyCatLady (Aug 17, 2004)

I had my boy in Ventura County, CA. It was a very poor county hospital. I was casually asked about circ once by three different people. I said no and they just checked a box or something on their clipboards. It wasn't a big deal at all.

But the hospital being so poor, wasn't too quick to offer up anything "extra". Like during my 10 hour labor, I was never once offered an epidural. Nurses never offered formula for the baby and just assumed I was going to breastfeed. It was easy to have a pretty crunchy birthing experience there.


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## babygrant (Mar 10, 2005)

Was never asked. It was never brought up. I put it in my birth plan just to be safe...but I don't even think they looked at my birth plan.


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## becca_howell (Jan 3, 2009)

When I signed the refusal of consent form for the vitamin k and eye ointment, I wrote in big letters in the "other" section of the refusal form "NO CIRCUMCISION". It never came up.


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## moonfirefaery (Jul 21, 2006)

With my oldest, they didn't push it, but they made it clear they were in favor of it. They told me about the "health benefits" and said he'd have anesthesia. Later I found that anesthesia meant getting to suck on a finger dipped in sugar water... With my youngest, who was a UC, no one pushed it. The doctor asked about it at his first newborn check-up and never brought it up again!


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## DJay (Sep 10, 2006)

What is UC in this context?


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## Lory (Mar 19, 2011)

I think it means uncircumcised.

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *DJay*
> 
> What is UC in this context?


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## moonfirefaery (Jul 21, 2006)

UC = Unassisted Childbirth

He was born at home, without any birth professional, so obviously no one was there to push circ on us.  He is, also, uncircumcised, though lol


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## nsmomtobe (Aug 22, 2009)

They don't ask here in Nova Scotia, which I think is a large part of the reason that the rates are so low. Only one person I know was asked, and that was by her OB before she went to the hospital--she was told that there is only one doctor in NS who does circumcisions, so if she wanted it done, she should make an appointment with him. I have no idea why that particular OB felt the need to promote the "circ guy" like that. Most health professionals here do not bring it up at all, and when asked about it will say, "It's not medically necessary."


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## QueenOfTheMeadow (Mar 25, 2005)

All three of my kids were born in the hospital with a midwife. I said right in the beginning, no circ. She was pleased with the decision. Put it in my chart and I was never asked about it. So that was good!


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## kriket (Nov 25, 2007)

I think I checked a box









I probably said it more than once, they had to take DS right after for xrays, and I send DH with him and remember yelling "NO CIRC NO SHOTS!" as they left.

We're getting ready for #2 with the same MW at the same hospital, so, hopefully I can check the same box!


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## Evergreen (Nov 6, 2002)

I am planning my first hospital birth. At 30 weeks my Dr. asked if we were planning to do it. He said, "Great! That's awesome!" when I said no and thn, "I'll put that in your chart so they don't need to ask again at the hospital."

So, we'll see.


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## erin23kate (Apr 16, 2009)

We were asked many, many times. Twice while I was in labor, and 4 times after my son was born. All but once, our refusals garnered a relieved/happy reaction from the nurses; once a snarky type quipped that she'd dealt with "old men" with "gross foreskins" and believed in circ but quickly shut up with the look I gave her. It was really odd; I gave birth in a "baby-friendly" hospital where breastfeeding was strongly supported, there was no nursery, and where they taught safe co-sleeping practices. I commented to one nurse that circumcision is about the least "baby-friendly" a hospital could do to a newborn, and she agreed. Some of the nurses there refuse to attend the procedures, but obviously that isn't stopping the hospital from pushing it at every opportunity.

I actually contacted the hospital after we left to request that they stop asking about circumcision. They don't need to openly oppose it (although I wish they would), but to continually ask can make parents believe it's necessary. I never heard back.


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## outlier (Sep 29, 2008)

No, they didn't push. We were asked a couple times, but it was more like they needed to know which box to check on the forms they were filling out. We had a very short birth plan that clearly said "no circ" on it, and they never even gave us a consent form. I mentioned this on another thread, but our pp hospital room happened to be right across the hall from the circ room.







This was a "baby-friendly" hospital as well, though it certainly didn't sound like it from our room. Ugh, and as I was wheeled out of the room after being discharged, they had the door to that room open and were busy getting set up as the next victim lay sleeping peacefully in his plastic bassinet.


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## Alyantavid (Sep 10, 2004)

With my oldest, they asked once if we were planning to circ. We said no and never heard about it again. With my youngest, they didn't even ask.


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## teraze (Apr 6, 2011)

We invited the question because my husband was for it, while I'm against. Our birth plan made crystal clear that we were undecided and what we wanted if we went through with the procedure. My husband FINALLY  came around on the second day and we declined. The nurses were totally fine with our decision. One nurse made the unsolicited comment that it's really not a big deal for the baby. While I wholeheartedly disagree, we set ourselves up for it.

I do have to say though that our hospital experience was awesome. I went drug-free and the nurses' gentle encouragement really helped me stick to my birth plan. And when we declined the hep b vaccine, it was no problem. I had great support in breastfeeding and the hospital promotes rooming in. I was actually pleasantly surprised at how well everything went. If we have another boy, it will be easy peasy - no difficult decisions to make.


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## puglover333 (May 1, 2009)

They asked when I was first admitted. My OB asked just after delivery. My first post-partum nurse asked.

No one seemed to have a reaction either way to me saying no. They completely respected my decision. No pushing at all.


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## jyurina (Mar 17, 2005)

I also had my son in San Diego. When we were asked we said "no, of course not" most of the nurses were supportive. One was not and went into a litany of reasons why we should, and told us how "quick" it was. She was asked to no longer talk to us or do any care for our son, not for that but because she was giving me a hard time about breastfeeding.


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## WaitingForKiddos (Nov 30, 2006)

Nope. No one asked. We did have "no circumcision" on the birth plan and every person that came into the room got a copy.


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## 2lilsweetfoxes (Apr 11, 2005)

My first 2 were at the same hospital. Completly different experiences. With baby #1, they put out a cattle call in the evening that all parents need to go to the "dayroom" (a room with sofas and TVs and such where you can visit with larger groups of people than would be comfortable in your room and they hold classes, such as the baby-care basics class). While the parents are in there, they go over circumcision care and such and the boys are circumcised while parents are in the class. My roomie and I both had girls, but they were getting ready to go to the class. I went down the hall real quick (DH was in the room with DD) and asked them if parents of girls had to attend--no. If you aren't circumcising your son, do you need to go? No, definitely not. We circumcise the babies while the parents are in the class. My second baby 2 years later, I told them I was still undecided. But, I was terrified that I'd already signed the consent form when pre-admitting (was in a rush to pick up DD from daycare as they'd been late getting to me on my appointment). They said the procedure had changed and the parents must come to the nursing station and arrange for the circumcision. When I checked out, they were so apologetic that the doc who does the circumcisions had already left for the day a couple hours previous. But, I could bring him up at his 3 day well-baby check. Um, no thanks. Baby 3, also a girl, well if she'd been a boy, I still wouldn't get it done, but I didn't really pay attention. My roommate had her boy circumcised. If you have a boy in the hospital, try to either get a room alone or room with a woman who had a girl and get out of there asap.


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## Sarah (Nov 20, 2001)

So much for informed consent- they do the class while they circumcise the babies? How horrible! I hope that has changed.


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## angelpie545 (Feb 23, 2005)

I can't remember how many times I was asked, but I don't think it was many. My first two were girls and born in a free standing birth center, so it was a non-issue. I had my son in a baby-friendly hospital with only a special care nursery for sick/premature babies, 100% rooming in, very pro-breastfeeding, ext. When they asked there was no pressure, it seemed like they just needed to know so they could make the proper arrangements if I was, which of course I wasn't. It was no big deal.


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## 2lilsweetfoxes (Apr 11, 2005)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Sarah*
> 
> So much for informed consent- they do the class while they circumcise the babies? How horrible! I hope that has changed.


It changed sometime between 2001 and 2003. Probably because some poor parents went in, thinking it was a required baby-care class and their son was done and they had enough clout (read: rank, either the mom or the dad) and refused to be "calmed down"--either by threats (I have seen young military personnel be threatened with calling the commander and/or first sergeants and the person telling the CO that "PVT Such-and-Such is threatening us and we are afraid" if they don't agree and drop the matter and get out of their face.) or appeasement, or payments of a sum of money (maybe, though, that happened, but then they changed policy to try to prevent it from happening again). Believe me, rank matters. They try to act as if it doesn't, but when I was a Private, having my first baby, I was treated as if I was uneducated and didn't know squat. The doctors/nurses tried to steamroll me and my decisions or act as if I didn't have a choice in matters. I got out before she was born and then as Mrs. X, I garnered a bit more respect, but as a Specialist's wife, not as much as an NCO or officer's wife. When I had the third baby, I was an NCO and I think I got a bit more leeway. And, by that time, I'm more of: better to beg forgiveness than ask permission with that kind of stuff and DD2 was born 45 minutes after I was admitted, so I pretty much got to do whatever I wanted.

One thing I'm never clear on, is what if one parent wants it and the other does not? What would stop DH from sending (hypothetical, newborn) DS to be circumcised while I'm in the shower or something? Or, mom wants it done and dad does not, but dad is deployed? Or, mom just sends baby to be done while dad isn't at the hospital? Or (soldier) mom protects baby in hospital, then deploys--dad gets it done while mom is deployed?


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## palmgal (Mar 7, 2004)

With my first boy we were never asked, and in fact we were told the pediatrician on call refuses to do circumcisions and we would have to schedule with our own pediatrician after release if we wanted one. With my second, born at a different hospital, we were asked, and refused, no less than 10 times at the hospital. Everyone was polite, but seemed surprised every time we refused.


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## Marsupialmom (Sep 28, 2003)

My son is 16. I had a nurse come in the room and try to roll him off. I was in the bathroom. I asked her weres she was going and she said circumcision. I said we were not going to do that. She looked at me like I had a third eye. They didn't ask.

My second one I put it in the birth plan. She was suppose to be a boy. My doctor was Jewish. He never questioned no circumcision. I think that most of his clients were that way. I got to the the hospital and me and my first nurse went a round. She asked if I was sure it was a boy. I finally told her it didn't matter if it was a boy or girl no circumcision and asked her to leave. After I delivered, I told the doctor the exchange (I arrived at 9 am and was holding my child by 1015). He "talked" to her. I told him I wanted her no were near me or my child. I received an apology from her. This doctor ask for permission to use my birth plan as an example of other mothers. He blacked out my name.

My third child, I had just "updated" my birth plan from my daughter. This doctor was the second doctor's protege he was still giving out my birth plan. I was not asked about it before I had her. Never after, either.


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## mimie (Mar 7, 2003)

I had my son a year ago at a hospital in central Oregon. Circ was never even mentioned. I was there for four days.


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## MsFortune (Dec 5, 2010)

I had my son in San Diego 2 years ago and I don't recall being asked. It may have been a question in my admission paperwork. For sure, no one pushed it.


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## mamadebug (Dec 28, 2006)

My DS is 6 and was born in northern CA, and I don't remember being asked by anyone. We had a birth plan that stated we didn't want him to be circ'd, but I don't think we weren't asked because they were following our birth plan since one of the nurses came in after DS was born and apologized for doing something else that we had specifically stated we didn't want in the birth plan - she said she hadn't been aware of it and was really sorry once she was aware of it and read it. We actually asked the staff pediatrician how frequent it was for baby boys to be circ'd at this hospital when he came around to check DS the day after he was born. He seemed horrified that we asked, and told us we would have to find another doctor if we wanted to have it done (which we didn't - he misunderstood - we were just curious about statistics for our area). So, not a big deal for us at all.


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## ~Amy~ (Jun 7, 2009)

No one ever mentioned circumcision at any point during prenatal care, in the hospital or afterwards. Circumcision is not performed anywhere in our city. You have to travel ~2 hours away to have it done.


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## EchoSoul (Jan 24, 2011)

Nope. I was asked three times - once by the nurse in the Labor and Delivery Room, once by one of his nurses in the NICU, and once by the Neonatalogist that discharged him. They all said, "Okay." and didn't question or mention anything about the care of it.


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## Katie T (Nov 8, 2008)

No one offered when I had my DS 4 yrs ago either. I did tell them after he was born that he was NOT to be touched and I wanted a sign hung on his bed saying so. I was very worried about them "accidentally" grabbing him and doing it. Not that in the end it mattered since he roomed in the whole time but I was quiet pleased that It was not even offered.


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