# How NOT to give a baby their first bath.



## RoseDuperre (Oct 15, 2007)

I'm not sure if this is the right forum, but it seemed more fitting here than in LWAB (though I was torn).

Warning: I was very upset by this.


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## emamum (Dec 4, 2008)

that made me cry, the poor baby








nothing like the beautiful bonding experience my childrens first baths were


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## jennyfah (Jul 20, 2006)

uke

To quote Dr. Marsden Wagner: "If you really want a humanized birth, the best thing to do is get the hell out of the hospital."


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## NewDirections (Jul 18, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jennyfah* 
uke

To quote Dr. Marsden Wagner: "If you really want a humanized birth, the best thing to do is get the hell out of the hospital."


Great quote!

That bath looked so traumatizing







The baby was so upset


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## treetop (Jul 9, 2008)

I am stunned. Does anybody know what happened to this women? I had to shut it off. Absolutely horrible.


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## isabchi (Sep 14, 2006)

I can't even finished to watch this video. I still feel very guilty to had my DD in the hospital. They scrubbed her very hard, worse that the video.







: We still crying for her, even now after almost 4 years later.Thankfully, DS born at home and his first bath (at 2 weeks old) was pure joy.


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## birthangeldoula (Feb 1, 2008)

Sadness --- poor baby!
I recently gave birth to my baby girl in the hospital and was grateful for the wonderful nurses who took care of us. My hubby gave my baby girl her first bath and she never left our sides the entire time we were there.


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## MamaJenese (Aug 14, 2006)

That is exactly why my two hospital born babies where never in the nursery even for a second and not bathed there! The nurses looked at me like I had two heads when I said no bath we are fine we will take care of it. Poor little one.


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## pers (Jun 29, 2005)

Yikes!










In the hospital here, they bring a little tub of warm water to the mother's room to give the baby a gentle bath. I appreciated getting the blood and birth gunk off, and they didn't scrub overly hard so left a decent amount of vernix. Much better. Hospitals here have their faults, but I am grateful for the rooming in policy.


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## felix23 (Nov 7, 2006)

That poor baby.


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## ChaoticMum (Mar 23, 2009)

I saw many comments on the YouTube page about why the parent didn't stop this....I had the same question??? WHY?? Why would you not stop it????? As awful as the fact is that these things go on behind our backs - there was someone VIDEOTAPING it????????


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## txgal (Jul 16, 2003)

My guess is the dad was videotaping and didn't realize he had the "right" to stop them. I am always surprised to see that most dads (first timers especially) will not even touch their babies until the nurse gives permission. Of course I always jump in and tell them it is okay. It is like the baby is not really theirs in the hospital. And of course the nurses are the experts, what does a first time father know







: (insert sarcasm here)


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## filiadeluna (Oct 2, 2007)

WOW. That is horrible. I did not allow the hospital staff to bathe my daughter, and thank goodness I didn't! I didn't think it could be *that* bad, but I wanted to give her a gentle sponge bath, later, by myself.

The only thing that sucks is my DD hates the sponge bath anyway. She cries like that even though I am extremely gentle and make sure the water is warm (not hot, not cold). She is a fussy baby in general, though.


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## TzippityDoulah (Jun 29, 2005)

can someone explain it to me? I can't get youtube b/c we have a fliter... but I'm dying to know all the huhbub is about!


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## claddaghmom (May 30, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *HennyPenny* 
can someone explain it to me? I can't get youtube b/c we have a fliter... but I'm dying to know all the huhbub is about!

It's an ameteur video of a nurse rinsing a naked newborn under a running faucet


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## TzippityDoulah (Jun 29, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *filiadeluna* 
The only thing that sucks is my DD hates the sponge bath anyway. She cries like that even though I am extremely gentle and make sure the water is warm (not hot, not cold). She is a fussy baby in general, though.









my daughter was the SAME way. turns out she is very sensory sensitive... so we learned some tricks - when the baby is in a baby bath, put a warm wet towel over the entire body. only uncover small parts at a time to wash. and don't use any sponges or clothes unless you have to. this helps us a lot. it didn't take away all the fussies, but it improved things.

after bath we did a lotion rub down. you can also do this BEFORE the baby. it helps prepare the skin nerves to receive a bath a lot better. it is also calming.

The other thing to consider - is once a baby gets used to crying/being upset over something it can take some de-conditioning time. so you may have ot try this several times before it would really work.


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## katmann (Oct 15, 2008)

I watched exactly one second before turning it off.


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## fresh_veggie (Jan 27, 2009)

That was so incredibly heart wrenching.


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## Channelle (May 14, 2008)

OMG I feel like crying and puking! I'm definately not going to let my baby be washed by the nurses (if I have a hospital birth!)


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## Full Heart (Apr 27, 2004)

As awful as it is I am glad that its out there for people to watch because no one ever believes you when you tell them what can really happen.


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## SmoothieMom (Feb 12, 2009)

Oh my gosh, that poor little baby.


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## Peppamint (Oct 19, 2002)

Wow... un-freakin-believable!


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## RoseDuperre (Oct 15, 2007)

I did notice that the person sharing the video is located in Israel, so this was probably an Israeli hospital. Do you guys think this is less likely to happen in the US?


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## Super~Single~Mama (Sep 23, 2008)

poor baby

My boyfriend helped our midwife give Lincoln his first bath - I was in bed recovering - but they were in the room with me (at a free standing birth center) and it was so sweet, he didn't like it much, but both the midwife and my boyfriend were talking to him, holding him, it was very calm and relaxed, not rough at all! And then he was swaddled and given to me







The bath was of course after we held him for several hours, and got to know him a bit. His birthday was one of the best days of my life - one of the hardest, but one of the best.


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## jennica (Aug 10, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *RoseDuperre* 
I did notice that the person sharing the video is located in Israel, so this was probably an Israeli hospital. Do you guys think this is less likely to happen in the US?

I was going to say the same thing, her location was listed as Israel. And I think it is a lot less likely that this would happen in the US, or at least it would not have happened right in front of a video camera due to the litigious nature of our country. The rough handling and drying off would happen, but I don't think the running the water over the head and mouth would happen. I would never take the chance though.


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## Comtessa (Sep 16, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *jennica* 
And I think it is a lot less likely that this would happen in the US, or at least it would not have happened right in front of a video camera due to the litigious nature of our country.

As for the first statement, I'm not so sure. It isn't like the US has a great reputation for its high standards of newborn-friendly hospital care. As for the second statement, I'm convinced that you're right. The hospitals we toured said absolutely no cameras in L&D at all, at least while the staff is in the room.

(BTW, Who was it that said on this forum recently that if the doctors didn't go out of their way to take credit for every healthy baby delivered, as if they were entirely responsible, perhaps people wouldn't go out of their way to sue the doctors as if they were responsible for every _un_healthy baby?!?!)


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## sapphire_chan (May 2, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *pers* 
In the hospital here, they bring a little tub of warm water to the mother's room to give the baby a gentle bath.









:
And it was after like an hour and after she'd pooped a huge amount of meconium over both of us.


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## wombatclay (Sep 4, 2005)

This is a reminder from your friendly neighborhood moderator... please keep in mind the following portions of the mdc user agreement guidelines:

Quote:

*Do not post profane* or sexually explicit *text*. Discussions of a sexual nature should be within the realm of topics inherent to Mothering discussions such as sex after delivery, sex and the family bed, etc. Please see the MDC User Agreement.
(this includes using things like $ or * to "blank out" portions of profane words) and

Quote:

Do not post in a disrespectful, defamatory, adversarial, baiting, harassing, offensive, insultingly sarcastic or otherwise improper manner, toward a member or other individual, including casting of suspicion upon a person, invasion of privacy, humiliation, demeaning criticism, name-calling, personal attack, or in any way which violates the law.
I know this video is very provoking, and I realize it is easy to let your emotional reaction lead the way, but please keep these guidelines in mind as you submit your post. Thanks for listening, and please let me know (via PM) if you have any questions or concerns about this!


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## ChristaM (Jan 7, 2009)

That made me cry! Poor baby! This is why we either bathe our own babies or have them do it in the room. I was too tired from a 20+ hour labor to bathe DD1, but my nurse was great, she filled up a warm tub and brought it to me and gently washed her and let me help and handed her to me right away. I would be so sad if I found out this had happened to my child!


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## Phantaja (Oct 10, 2006)

Goodness. I was more tender when cleaning the chicken that I baked for dinner a few nights ago.


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## ShwarmaQueen (Mar 28, 2008)

OMG that was awful!!! Now I'm wondering if DD went through that...is that the standard way to do it (if the nurses do it)?


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## Peppamint (Oct 19, 2002)

I posted this video on my facebook page and an IRL friend posted and said this was done to her last baby after he was born- but I don't recall if she was living in Bosnia or Romania at the time... this was just last year.


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## pjs (Mar 30, 2005)

How awful!


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## MegBoz (Jul 8, 2008)

I remember a thread a few months ago about not having your baby washed in the hospital because of the risk of this, but we had a great experience. Very baby & Mama friendly hospital. They did the bath in a basinette right next to my bed. DH filmed while I sat in bed & watched. (I had wanted to help, but my legs were still too weak to stand for long.)

DS didn't even cry - he looked very chill as the nurse washed his hair. It's a cute video.


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## Llyra (Jan 16, 2005)

Both my girls were washed right after birth; I had c-sections, and wasn't with them. DH was though. They were washed under a warm faucet, just like that baby, and they cried terribly through the whole experience, according to DH.

I had him watch that video, though, and he said that it wasn't like THAT at all. The nurses did the job pretty efficiently, but they were gentle and careful and talked to the babies the whole time, and water was not run over their faces like that. He says it wasn't really great the way it was done, but the tone of it was a lot nicer than what's shown in that video.

We were allowed cameras freely in L&D, and video cameras too; just not in the OR.

DS wasn't washed until he was a few days old, because he was having trouble maintaining his body temperature, and the general opinion was that washing him would really NOT help. DH gave him his first bath, in a little plastic tub that the hospital provided, and it was a nice gentle experience.


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## Honey693 (May 5, 2008)

I watched about two seconds of that and felt too sick to go on. That poor baby.
I had DD bathed in the hospital, but they did it right in the room and it was awesome. She was covered with a towel except for the part that wasn't being washed, the nurse talked to her the whole time and was incredibly gentle and DD was just so mellow for the whole thing.


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## DanelleB (Jan 4, 2008)

How awful! I watched maybe 5 seconds when DS1 ran up and gasped. He wanted to know why they were hurting the baby. Even a 5 year old could tell it was wrong.

All 4 of my kids were bathed in the hospital. They were given sponge baths in the nursery and their heads gently rinsed under the faucet. They were all very calm throughout.


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## flowers (Apr 8, 2004)

Am I the only one who didn't bathe their babies for a week or so?

We very gently pat dried them, but I remember reading that the new baby doesn't really need a bath and to rub the vernix back into the skin. I don't think I bathed them until the cord fell off and then ever so gently.

Personally, I don't let *anyone* touch my baby unless they have my utmost trust and even then they would never leave the room.

I just saw this amazing talk called , "What Would Mammals Do" and she talked about how biologically important it is for a mom and baby to be able to smell each other in those first few hours. She even suggested not using those baby hats as it impedes part of the normal biological bonding that takes place in those first few hours.


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## claddaghmom (May 30, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *flowers* 
Am I the only one who didn't bathe their babies for a week or so?

We very gently pat dried them, but I remember reading that the new baby doesn't really need a bath and to rub the vernix back into the skin. I don't think I bathed them until the cord fell off and then ever so gently.

Personally, I don't let *anyone* touch my baby unless they have my utmost trust and even then they would never leave the room.

I just saw this amazing talk called , "What Would Mammals Do" and she talked about how biologically important it is for a mom and baby to be able to smell each other in those first few hours. She even suggested not using those baby hats as it impedes part of the normal biological bonding that takes place in those first few hours.

DD didn't have any vernix.

We soaked in an herbal sitz bath on the day she was born. Very relaxing and so connecting! She was sooo alert!


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## flowers (Apr 8, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *claddaghmom* 
DD didn't have any vernix.

We soaked in an herbal sitz bath on the day she was born. Very relaxing and so connecting! She was sooo alert!

That does sound heavenly.


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## Romana (Mar 3, 2006)

I didn't watch the video. I know it would just upset me.

When we had #1 in a hospital, we were told that we wouldn't be discharged until we had bathed the baby. So we said fine, bring us the stuff & we'll do it. They said no, a nurse had to "help" with the first bath.







It ended up being dh versus the nurse while I talked to a friend and tried to pretend I couldn't hear my baby crying. It was pretty awful. My husband told me he had to give her the "look of death" in order to keep her from being too rough.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *flowers* 
I just saw this amazing talk called , "What Would Mammals Do" and she talked about how biologically important it is for a mom and baby to be able to smell each other in those first few hours. She even suggested not using those baby hats as it impedes part of the normal biological bonding that takes place in those first few hours.

This is the one thing I didn't like about ds' waterbirth. He smelled like the plastic liner, instead of the heavenly scent that dd had when she was born. For that reason, I won't give birth in water again. Labor, sure, but I'm getting out to birth, because I want that amazing scent on my baby. It was pure heaven.


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## flowers (Apr 8, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Romana9+2* 

This is the one thing I didn't like about ds' waterbirth. He smelled like the plastic liner, instead of the heavenly scent that dd had when she was born. For that reason, I won't give birth in water again. Labor, sure, but I'm getting out to birth, because I want that amazing scent on my baby. It was pure heaven.

I know the plastic liner! I had the best waterbirth with ds2, but there was a total semi-awareness of the fact I was birthing in a big ziplock bag. yuck! I love being in water and at that point I had to cut my losses. I guess my ideal would be to have a nice cedar hot tub or something. I did add sea salt to neutralize the water and make it more gentle for baby.


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## LiamsMommy (Jan 20, 2004)

OMG!! That is terrible! I would be writing all kinds of letters and writing hospital administration! She allowed the water to go into the baby's ears and mouth!! That brought tears to my eyes!

I had to have my ds in the hospital because I became high risk. I asked to delay bathing and the nurse said as long as it was done by the end of her shift. I brought my own natural baby wash and they actually gave him more of a sponge bath under a baby warmer with me hovering over.


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## CookAMH (Jun 2, 2008)

I could only watch half of it, how horrendous!! That poor little baby. What a terrible way to be welcomed to the world.

We saw a video in our childbirth class of a bath where the nurse was so rough - not a lot of water, more like a sponge bath but the baby was miserable.


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## monkaha (Jan 22, 2004)

This kind of thing is why DS2 wasn't bathed in the hospital. I remember from my nursing school rotation thru ob how much the babies cried. I was really surprised at how DS2 didn't smell funky or anything (no reason why he should, I guess, just a societal thing where babies are 'dirty' until bathed for the first time). It was also good because the nurses treated him as a biohazard and wore gloves every time they touched him. I think that cut down on their wanting to mess with him.


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## Theoretica (Feb 2, 2008)

Well, I had a hospital birth both times and BOTH times I had my baby in the whirpool with me within minutes of birth. We both took a bath together and snuggled and got cleaned up, twas delightful! I can't even fathom handing my baby off to a stranger for any reason. Good grief!


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## november (Mar 22, 2009)

That video makes me want to bawl. Poor, sweet baby. To hear it gurgling under the water made me sick.


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## SaraLe6 (Mar 4, 2009)

Both my sons were bathed like that. I have pictures of DS1 screaming bloody murder through it all.. I had no idea it was something I should stop, I was a young first time mom and thought that's just what was supposed to happen. It was within 10 minutes of his birth too.







DS2 was a preemie and was in the NICU, we were not there for any of the baths they gave him but they do them just the same. They at least don't run water over the face, though..


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## LilacMama (Aug 18, 2008)

A few hours after my daughter was born, I let them take her to the nursery for a hearing screen. I had already told the nurse that I would give her a bath at home. I said, "Bring her back as soon as she's finished" and I fell asleep. Wouldn't you know, I woke up a couple hours later and she wasn't there, my husband went to get her, and she was all clean and smelled like baby soap.









I work in a hospital and I've never seen a bath *that* rough before, but I am uncomfortable with the way they do it, and I would never have purposefully allowed that for my baby.


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## Breeder (May 28, 2006)

This is exactly the reason our babes never leave our sight in the hospital. We bathed them in our room.

Poor little bit.


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## Talula Fairie (Jan 7, 2005)

I lasted about three seconds.

*HORRIFIED*


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## Storm Bride (Mar 2, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *flowers* 
I just saw this amazing talk called , "What Would Mammals Do" and she talked about how biologically important it is for a mom and baby to be able to smell each other in those first few hours. She even suggested not using those baby hats as it impedes part of the normal biological bonding that takes place in those first few hours.

Isn't she amazing? She spoke at the ICAN conference in 2007, and really resonated with me...probably my favourite speaker of the whole thing. Everything she said made _so_ much sense.


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## Talula Fairie (Jan 7, 2005)

Why would a baby hat impede bonding? Isn't it a good thing to keep the baby's head warm? If you have them in just a diaper there's still lots of room for skin to skin contact.


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## Romana (Mar 3, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Talula Fairie* 
Why would a baby hat impede bonding? Isn't it a good thing to keep the baby's head warm? If you have them in just a diaper there's still lots of room for skin to skin contact.

In the U.S., it's believed that the baby has to have the hat because he can't regulate his own temperature. In other places (France is one example), they rarely use baby hats because they believe that the baby's body's best way of quickly figuring out how to regulate its own temperature is NOT to have the hat.

It is absolutely unnecessary in the case of a normal birth to put a hat on the baby. The baby should be skin-to-skin with mama and covered in a blanket, but the hat is unnecessary. The smells on the baby's head are intense and can be a major part of bonding. Certainly was for me. The smell on my baby daughter's head was amazing, so much so that it almost made me light-headed. I kept sneaking her hat off so I could breathe it in.

I was able to get "no hat" treatment for my son because he was born at home. However, he smelled like the plastic liner from the birth pool, so I missed out on that lovely smell. I still bonded with him wonderfully, but I know I missed something and I don't want to miss it again. There are many aspects of the hormonal, physical, emotional post-partum bonding dance and you don't have to optimize all of them, or even any of them, to bond beautifully with your baby. That doesn't make it any less desirable to try to optimize bonding, if that's what the mother wants.


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## Romana (Mar 3, 2006)

I just found some good info on skin-to-skin (as treatment for a hypothermic newborn) with and without hats:

Quote:

_Roberts (1981) found no significant difference in core body temperature 10 minutes after birth for infants who had been given hats in addition to traditional care versus infants without hats (McCall, Alderice, Halliday, Jenkins, & Vorha, 2005). In Elabbassi et al.'s (2002) study, a thermal mannequin simulating a low birthweight newborn was created to examine the effects of wearing a hat on heat loss. The authors determined that using a hat decreased heat loss by an average of 18.9%. The authors concluded that a hat is not necessary in a normothermic infant because it could increase the risk of overheating, but it may be helpful in cases of accidental hypothermia. Ludington-Hoe et al. (2003) suggest application of a hat if abdominal or axillary temperature falls below 36 °C. The WHO (2003) also recommends that the hypothermic infant wear a hat during STS treatment_.
http://www.nursingcenter.com/prodev/...asp?tid=673610

The above shows that normothermic babies should not wear a hat, and that while a hat may be helpful for a hypothermic baby, skin-to-skin contact should still be maximized and a hypothermic baby will warm up with skin-to-skin even if the head is not covered with a hat. There's more good info in the link (a little more than halfway down, under section "Place Hat on Newborn's Head") but I was afraid to run afoul of the copyright rules by posting it.


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## wanderinggypsy (Jul 26, 2005)

Barbaric.


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## hipumpkins (Jul 25, 2003)

My Dh went with the kids fir thier 1st baths b/c I had 2 C sections. Both times he reported that the kids loved the water.
I had no idea the babies were run under a faucet..I am going to ask DH about that tomorrow. I always pictured them in a little baby bathtub.


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## Freefromitall (Sep 15, 2008)

I can usually handle horrible videos. But that one bothered me so much I had to stop partway through. I just can't imagine DOING that. And who was filming? Why didn't they stop her?


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## Shelsi (Apr 4, 2005)

Ok that was horrible. I wanted to jump through my screen and nurse and hold that baby!

My first was born in the hospital and dh went with him for the first bath and dh said it was nothing like that. He said ds didn't like it, but it was just a tub bath and supposedly they did not rub too hard.

We didn't really understand though that we had any rights at all...heck they did some awful things to me during labor & delivery and I had no idea I could say no to any of it. Right now if anyone tried to do anything even remotely close to that video to one my babies I would kick some major butt...but back when I had my first I prob would have just watched feeling bad but assuming they knew what they were doing because they are the experts


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## octobermoon (Nov 22, 2007)

i couldn't watch the entire thing...poor baby, it was gurgling water


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## Valrock (Nov 10, 2004)

That was awful! Stuff like that is why I NEVER left my babies sides in the hospital. Both of them were lightly sponged off a few hours after birth with no soap. DH bathed DS and I felt well enough after DD's birth to get up and clean her off. She looked at me the whole time with her big wide eyes. It was a lovely experience.

I can't imagine what would possess that nurse to think that's an okay way to tread a newborn!! Awful







.


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