# UPDATED: How many more babies do I have to lose



## TappinMamma (Dec 24, 2002)

In order to bring one home safely?? For the third time this year I'm saying goodbye to what could have been. Well I'm guessing I'm miscarrying since I have some pretty heavy cramping and bright red bleeding. I just don't understand why. When my Elijah was taken away last time, and I said hello and goodbye to him in one breath with him in my arms, I thought God wouldn't be so cruel to let this happen again. All I want to know is what I've done to deserve so much pain over and over again. I know when I've been defeated. I am obviously not meant to have anymore children, so I guess I'm just giving up. A mamma should be able to decide herself when she is done having children. I just don't understand why this keeps happening to me.


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## Raven (Dec 15, 2001)

Sarah - Im so sorry. Words are so weak at a time like this... they just cannot convey what I want them to... I hope you find the peace you seek.... You have a right to feel the way you do - your feelings are yours to own and lead you to where you need to be.

We are here for you...


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## ChildoftheMoon (Apr 9, 2002)

Sarah, mama, I am so sorry. My heart is aching, my arms are reaching. No words, just feeling..................I am here with you.
Love, Brandi


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## SweetTeach (Oct 5, 2003)

Fuck.
Sarah, have you gone to your care provider to get checked out? I hope that you are one of those women who has bright red bleeding and still carries her pg to term. I really do. No one deserves pain like this and I'm so sorry that you are dealing with this right now.

We are all here to listen- feel free to lean on us.


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## veggielover (Apr 17, 2004)

Sending hugs and a prayer your way. I am so sorry, Mama!


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## Ms. Mom (Nov 18, 2001)

I'm so very sorry {{{{HUG}}}}.

I wish I had an answer for you on why you've lost your precious babies.

Sending you love and support.


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## iris0110 (Aug 26, 2003)

Sarah, I am so sorry Mama. We are here for you.


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## IdentityCrisisMama (May 12, 2003)

Hugs, mama


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## shannon0218 (Oct 10, 2003)

I too have lost three, there is no way to describe the pain.
Have you had testing for recurrent pregnancy loss?? This may not be the time, but if you need some information, please let me know.


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## mclisa (Jul 26, 2004)

You need so much more than a flashing hug on the screen. Come and vent. Hope you are getting the support you need.


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## wilkers8 (Mar 22, 2004)

I'm so very sorry!!!!!


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## JessicaS (Nov 18, 2001)

Sarah, I am so sorry for your loss. I wish I had some incredibly wise words that will bring you comfort, though I doubt much will bring you comfort when you have been dealt such a blow.


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## TappinMamma (Dec 24, 2002)

Hi ladies, just an update. Thanks so much for all the kind words. I had the beta done this morning, and my HCG level was at 44,000, which when my dr. called he said that was great. So I'm leaving in an hour for an ultrasound to see if the pregnancy is viable. I don't have any expectations that things will turn out well, but at least there is a possibility that things could be all right. But man oh man... bleeding during pregnancy is SO not fun







I'll update again when I get back!


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## HaveWool~Will Felt (Apr 26, 2004)

Sarah,
Thanks for the update. I so HOPE that everything is OK...Thinking of you and sending lots of love and peace your way!!!


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## wilkers8 (Mar 22, 2004)

I'll sending lots of positive vibes your way!!!!


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## weebitty2 (Jun 16, 2004)

Sarah - OT but how do you like Dr. Tovell?


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## shannon0218 (Oct 10, 2003)

Sending lots of positive sticky baby vibes!!!
I bled quite a bit in the early part of this pregnancy adn yes, I will concur--it sucks!!!


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## TappinMamma (Dec 24, 2002)

And we saw baby WITH a heartbeat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

at 133 beats/minute, she said everything looked great. I'm really in shock. I was sure I miscarried. I started crying right then and there. Little one is holding on!

Thanks so much for your support!

Oh and weebitty.. i've never even met dr. tovell yet, only spoken with him on the phone. so far he seems real nice. Just having someone concerned about me feels really nice! I go for my first "real" appt on 10/27.


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## shannon0218 (Oct 10, 2003)

Woo Hooo!!!!
Great news!!!!!!!!
Theres nothing nicer than seeing that heart beating away when you've convinced yourself the news will be bad!!!
I'm so happy for you Sarah!!


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## taradt (Jun 10, 2003)

what great news!!!!

i am so happy that this little one is holding on









has the bleeding stopped? i can't imagine how scary it would be to have bleeding in a pregnancy after losses

tara


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## iris0110 (Aug 26, 2003)

Oh Sarah I cried out in joy when I read that you saw the baby's heartbeat. Dh asked what I was doing. I am so glad that your little one is hanging on.


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## 2devils_1angel (Oct 14, 2003)

omg close call! you are blessed mama!!!!!!
now...I would demand your ob/mw send you to a peri.
a gf had 2 stillbirths (ds1,dd3) but has 3 living beautiful dd's. She intisted on going to a peri where they were able to get a real diagnosis.







prayers to you and new bean


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## JessicaS (Nov 18, 2001)

I am so thrilled for you!!

Prayers for


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## HaveWool~Will Felt (Apr 26, 2004)

Sarah,
I got on my knees today and prayed for you and your baby. Seriously...I prayed HARD!!







:

I am so happy to hear that you got to see the baby's heartbeat!!! YAHOO!!
Still sending lots of love, peace and prayers for you.
Lot of love mama!!!!


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## wilkers8 (Mar 22, 2004)

That's so wonderful!!!!! I know how horrible bleeding during a subsequent pregnancy can be.


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## ChildoftheMoon (Apr 9, 2002)

Sarah-wonderful news! Sending you lots of sticky baby vibes. My heart is full of happiness for you. Wishing you a lovely pregnancy and a healthy baby









Brandi


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## Ms. Mom (Nov 18, 2001)

Sarah, I'm so glad. I blead through most of my son's pregnancy. After several losses, it was really scarry









This is going to be a long pregnancy for you - please know we're here to hold you up.


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## SweetTeach (Oct 5, 2003)

**doing the happy dance**

Great news!!!


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## babycarrier (Apr 2, 2004)

Yay! For the strong heartbeat. Hold on tight baby.


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## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

YAY!!!!

I bled and cramped like you were talking about with Bryce at 16 weeks. My dh had to jsut about carry me into the room to see the nurse. I was so hysterical. We heard baby thumping away...sweet music...such sweet music...

I'm so happy for you!!!


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## Raven (Dec 15, 2001)

AWESOME news! Brightened my whole day!!


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