# Hour-long night wakings?



## mskgandn (Jun 3, 2005)

Hi everyone.

I'm at my wit's end...can't figure out the right way to handle my 8 mo old ds's habit of waking in the middle of the night and staying awake for over an hour.

Typical night:

5pm - home from daycare
5:30pm - nurses, often falls asleep (I think this is very comforting to him after daycare and don't really want to force him to skip this nap)
6-7pm - eats solids - cereal and veggie
7-8pm - playtime
8 - 8:30pm - sleeper, books, nursing, sleep
8:30 - asleep in crib until first waking...usually between 11:30 & 12:30 (I go to bed around 10:30)

Here's where it gets dicey. It used to be that he'd go back to sleep with some nursing and we would co-sleep until 3-4 am. Lately, though, even if I nurse him in the crook of my arm, he doesn't fall back asleep while nursing...and then no matter what I try -- songs, rocking, patting, ignoring, etc -- he can't/won't go back to sleep -- for hours.

I know that it has a lot to do with all the new skills he's learning and probably some teething, and I'm okay for that, but I'm not sure how to handle it. Unfortunately, if I've gone to bed at 10:30 and he's up at 12, I've only gotten a 'nap' and am pretty groggy and impatient during this time. Occasionally, in order to wake myself up and handle this time, I turn on a dim lamp and read while he 'exercises' and doesn't sleep. At some point, he's ready to fall back asleep.

Last night, he was up from 12:30 - 2:30. At 1:30, I turned on the light and read until he was ready to nurse back down. I know that all the advice is to keep the room dim, ignore the child, etc., to teach that nighttime is sleeptime, but I just can't stand struggling to stay awake or tolerate him babbling/screaming (no crying, just frustrated that he can't move the way he wants) if I'm just staring into the darkness or trying to 'rest' while he's up. I could move him to his own room, but I don't think he's ready for that.

Last night, he nursed back down at 2:30 and slept until 6:30, then slept 2 more hours in his swing while I got some much needed zzzzz's before work.

So, what am I doing? Supporting his bad habit of waking up for long periods by getting up with him? Or am I being a good mom by adapting to his needs to get up and move around? I'm of course worried that he's not getting enough sleep, though his naps at daycare have lengthened.

How did you all handle these challenging times?

mskgandn


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## rzberrymom (Feb 10, 2005)

I'm going through EXACTLY what you're going through right now. 9 month old DD wakes up every night at around 1am and wants to play and practice standing. When she does it, I don't move at all and I keep my eyes shut (or at least don't let her see me peaking at her)--she tries to wake me up (which is adorable), but if I don't move she gets tired after about 30-45 minutes and either just lies back down or lets me nurse her back to sleep. The first night was the worst--she tried for quite a while to wake me up, but each night after that she's played for less time. It's hard, but the faking sleep works every time. And I figure it's just temporary.

I think she would be up for hours too if I were to get up, read a book, etc.

Maybe someone else can tell us how long this will go on?


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## mskgandn (Jun 3, 2005)

Thanks for posting. It's always good to know I'm not the only one. I would try to ignore him, but he's so loud! After 10 mins of screaming (which can be really cute during the daytime when he's trying to master something, but gets frustrated). And then if he gets too frustrated, he starts to cry. So in order not to lose my mind, I distract myself with music or a book. I'm just worried about the long-term consequences of getting up with him.

mskgandn


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## katebleu (Feb 4, 2005)

dd and i went through a period of on and off night playtime when she was 7 to 10 months. i went through a period of crying and frustration trying to get dd back to sleep, but i realized that if she wouldn't just nurse back to sleep we should get up go to the living room and she could play in half light and i could read or internet. i do keep the room quiet because dd loves music and noise. i have found that it has a lot to do with teething and it takes about 2 hours for dd to settle back down (and for the teething tablets/tylanol to take effect). it has gotten better and dd is at 12 mos sleeping in a more usual routine.


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## turtlemama77 (Jul 29, 2005)

I do pretty much the same thing as the pp...if dd is awake, wide awake I can't force her to sleep. We usually end up hanging out in the living room because dh has to work and I don't want to wake him. We've actually had kind of a crummy week...dd wakes around 2-3am and has to poop, which keeps us up for at least an hour.

We're not really doing much about the wake ups, except not making a big deal out of it. I'm hoping it will pass...soon!

Sheri
Reese (12-22-04)


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## mskgandn (Jun 3, 2005)

Ah, thanks so much for your postings. I guess I just needed a little support. Last night was AWFUL! As usual, he slept well from 9-12:30 (luckily I went to bed at 9:45) and then was up until 4ish (I stopped looking at the clock). This time, I kept the lights dark, didn't get up, and was very close to losing my mind by the time he finally slept (after 3 nursing sessions, a diaper and sleeper change, a rub with babyVicks, some teething tablets, and drops in his nose since he seemed stuffy). Course then my dh, who had food poisoning, was up and by the time I got back in bed...I woke up the baby. Argh!!!!! Course ds was so tired by then that he started crying (hadn't cried a drop in the 3 hours he was awake earlier). I wanted to cry with him but was so tired and defeated I couldn't even raise a tear. I moved him into his swing (which to my horror he has almost outgrown) and he woke me up at 8:15 in a fairly chipper mood.

It's amazing that even after such a tough night, I'm so, so, so glad to see him in the morning. I sing him a little morning song to let him know I'm up and he just kicks and smiles. Then we play on the bed and nurse, and he is all kinds of charming, and I am in love once again. I guess it's what we all do to get through.

Luckily it's the weekend and dh (if he feels better) can take more of a role the next couple nights. And we have "date night" to look forward to on Sat when a friend will take ds for the evening. But next time he's awake, I'm turning that light on and reading again - regardless of whether I'm supporting his habit. I just can't take the hours alone, in the dark, with an awake baby and all my crazy thoughts and impatience. I'm happy to know some of you have gone through this, stopped trying to force dc to sleep and it did get better.

mskgandn


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## eleven (Aug 14, 2004)

What an interesting thread! I just came here to post about my dd (almost 12 months) whose new trick is staying up from 3:00 to 5:00 every night! ARGHHH!!!!! We've been trying in vain to get her back to sleep, but it looks like me may just have to give it up for a while.

She's teething pretty hard core right now, so that may have a lot to do with it. As much as it stinks, I'm glad I'm not alone.


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## katebleu (Feb 4, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mskgandn*
It's amazing that even after such a tough night, I'm so, so, so glad to see him in the morning. I sing him a little morning song to let him know I'm up and he just kicks and smiles. Then we play on the bed and nurse, and he is all kinds of charming, and I am in love once again. I guess it's what we all do to get through.

i always think that i'm going to be upset with dd for keeping me up at night, but i totally agree with the above. the minute i see that 'oh, it's you' grin, i melt.









thanks for putting it so well.


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