# Autopsy / Pathology in - still no answers



## LizaBear (Feb 1, 2003)

I saw my midwife (T) yesterday for my follow-up appointment after having Jessie. 5 weeks exactly since I delivered him.

She has the autopsy / pathology report, though she encouraged me not to read it myself - it's quite detailed in the description of the autopsy. Part of me wants to read it anyhow, but I'm positive she's correct - I do not want to be reading any detail about how my baby was cut up.

Bottom line though
- no significant abnormalities.
- hyper-coiling of cord.
- lack of Wharton's jelly.
- fetal demise estimated to have happened at 17 weeks (odd, since I had an u/s at 18w5d which showed a live fetus).

So - we are left with no answers, and a semantics confusion between a miscarriage (because Jesse died before 20 weeks) and a stillbirth (because Jesse was born at 22w6d). Not that it matters, call it a flibbertyjibbit for all I care - I lost my son, and the terminology doesn't change a damn thing.

But I so desperately wanted answers. Something to either fix or reassure us that this won't (likely) happen again.


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## baileyandmikey (Jan 4, 2005)

(((HUGS))) I am so sorry that you are going thru this, and it makes it worse when you have no answers for what happened.


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## WaitingForKiddos (Nov 30, 2006)

Your post really sticks with me.

I got my hospital reports from Amelia's birth yesterday. From about two weeks ago when MW and I decided we would go over it together till about one second after the records lady (after saying "oh!!you had a baby!!") I was sure I would not want to read it. We did not have an autopsy done as the cause of her birth was pProm but I didn't know what the report would say about her. But, I cracked the report open as soon as I was out if the records room. The report said everything I already knew. Like Jesse, no one knows what to call the loss. The UAV of a doctor was itching to take my uterus. Nothing I wanted to know like, what type of infection was in filled with was there. It looks like the DR decided to not culture anything. I'm very frustersted. All of that to say, don't read the report. Jesse is whole in your mind. Keep it that way. For me, it was like maybe there's going to be some magical sentence in the report that will make this less confusing. Our baby isn't here. Nothing can make that not confusing.








Jesse







Amelia

So many hugs to you mama. I'm crying think of our loss.


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## calmom (Aug 11, 2002)

i'm so sorry you didn't get any answers so that you would have something to "fix" and feel more confident for a possible next time. we knew that Matthew died because the cord was wrapped tight three times but there's nothing i can do to prevent that next time so i can relate to wishing there was something i could do different. *sigh*


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## Vermillion (Mar 12, 2005)

I'm so sorry that you didn't get any answers. I know how that feels







I hope in time you can feel at peace about it, but I know, it's so hard.


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## MI_Dawn (Jun 30, 2005)

Not knowing sucks. Knowing sucks. It all sucks!


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## Amy&4girls (Oct 30, 2006)

I am just so sorry


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## HoosierDiaperinMama (Sep 23, 2003)

I'm sorry you didn't gain any information about what happened to Jesse.







It's hard not having any answers or just having sketchy ones. I'm so sorry, Lea.


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## LizaBear (Feb 1, 2003)

Thank you everyone.


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## NullSet (Dec 19, 2004)

I'm so sorry.
















I remember reading on this forum a while back that after your baby dies he/she might shrink in size a little. I'm not 100% as I did read it here and not in a scientific journal. So just because the estimates were 17 weeks for your baby does not mean that you didn't see a heartbeat at almost 19 weeks. That might be a reason for the discrepancy. Hope that helps.


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## LizaBear (Feb 1, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *apecaut* 
I'm so sorry.
















I remember reading on this forum a while back that after your baby dies he/she might shrink in size a little. I'm not 100% as I did read it here and not in a scientific journal. So just because the estimates were 17 weeks for your baby does not mean that you didn't see a heartbeat at almost 19 weeks. That might be a reason for the discrepancy. Hope that helps.









We're aware of the issue of the body shrinking when there is a significant amount of time between death and birth.

Fate doesn't preserve the body of our children once they have left this world simply to spare us the pain of seeing a less than perfect sight.

* * * * * * Graphic * * * * *

Jesse's skull had collapsed. The bones basically folding over one another, causing his head to be quite flat and somewhat elongated.

I didn't understand it at the time - the midwife simply said that the bones shifted after his death.

Some research time on the internet explained why. The term 'masceration' is what I came up with - basically that the soft tissues were turning to liquid. Which included the brain.

Without the solidity, the bones shifted.

BUT - the bones remained the same size, and it is the measurement of the bones that determine the 'age' of the fetus from what I can understand.

We knew at our ultrasound (18w5d) that Jesse was measuring small - the tech kept muttering about how I wasn't yet 18 weeks, and how she needed to have a talk with the front desk about booking u/s too early. She wouldn't shut up and listen to me when I told her I was just shy of 19 weeks.

Would it have made a difference ?
- Not in the outcome, no.
But would it have raised some more flags for anyone ? I don't know. The midwife thinks it may have - likely that we would have found out about Jesse's death sooner.


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## fwlady (May 11, 2009)

I am so sorry for your loss. Kymberli


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## Paulaxox (Sep 25, 2009)

Hi

This is my first post on this site.

I'm so sorry to hear of the loss of Jesse. I registered with the site as i had to reply.

I have also lost 2 boys Alex at 20 weeks December 2006 and Harry at 21 weeks in September 2007. They were both perfect except they both had over twisted umbilical cords with a lack of Whartons jelly, Alex had stopped growing at 16 weeks but had lived until 19 weeks as we'd heard his heartbeat and i'd felt movement until then adn Harry was alive until the night before my re scan (I was being re scanned due to lack of amniotic fluid found on orginal scan).

I have also had 2 miscarriages at 6 weeks in 200, a 9 wk m/c in Feb 200, and ectopic in May '08 which resulted in removal of part of my right tube and yesterday we found out our latest pregnancy had failed I was scanned at 9+1 and baby was measuring 8+4 with a slow heartbeat and y'day i was scanned and no heartbeat.

We have never found out what caused us to lose the boys or the others it just "bad luck".

Paula


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## LizaBear (Feb 1, 2003)

I am so very sorry for your losses, Paula.


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## Paulaxox (Sep 25, 2009)

The thing that I find hardest is the not knowing, why were the boys perfect but still taken away ?

How are you feeling ?


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