# Being naked while giving birth.......



## tireesix (Apr 27, 2006)

Am I the only person who does care about being naked in front of people while birthing??????

I havee seen so many people say 'you just don't care when its happening', but I did and do every time. It makes me feel embarassed, it affects my labours, its just uncomfortable.

I didn't mind so much with my second birth because I was in a pool but even then, I got really peed off that everyone decided that they had to stand right behind me so they could see my bright white arse waving around in the air....... WHY????? I was wearing a nighty as well as the pool.... Oh, and despite insisting on being right behind me and there being so many midwives in the room (seriously, there weere like 4 midwives and 1 student midwife, earlier in the day I couldn't get even 1, by eveing time I seemed to have ALL of the on call midwives in my tiny flat), yes, sorry, despite insisting on staring at my bright white arse, they still managed to miss me birth the head.........

So yes, I really, really, really do caree about having many folk staring at my lady garden, it may look pretty but its not for public display and just cos some people are ok with having people look at theirs, doesn't mean I want people looking at my flowers or treading on the grass of my garden......

Some people seem to think I am odd for caring so much, but given my past history and my first birth experience, it is hardly surprising, I just wish more people wouold appreciate that..........

I think this is a vent more than anything........ I am not odd because I like to labour and birth in private without someone staring at my bits from every conceeivable angle......


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## Veritaserum (Apr 24, 2004)

I care, too. And your midwives should care that YOU care. You should discuss with them how they can help you feel most comfortable. If that means limiting who gets a view, then that's what needs to happen.

You're not weird. I never lose my inhibition. I'm always conscious to be covered because it's important to me. And I've given birth four times.







The birth pool helps me feel more protected.


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## sapphire_chan (May 2, 2005)

I'm generally more comfortable naked--when I'm alone or just with dh.

One of the reasons I'm UCing.

If I weren't, one of my main criteria for selecting a midwife was going to be that I'd have to feel comfortable around that person, and any assistants, while naked--before going into labor.

Check out the non-nude HB thread up in Homebirth for some great ideas on things to wear during labor.


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## Tizzy (Mar 16, 2007)

I'm not comfortable being naked around strangers, it was mortifying to me when I was in the hospital to have someone changing the puppy pads and cleaning me up afterwards etc. And they were complete strangers who I never have to see again!
So the thought of someone I KNOW being around...

Hence why I'm aiming for a UC! Around DH is one thing, but a couple midwives? Meh! I can assure you I'd hide out in the bathroom the entire time!
Even if I were in the tub, I'd still want it to be a bubble bath lol!

One thing that was impressed upon me by a stupid nurse at the hospital after I said something about feeling uncomfortable not being covered "There is no dignity in childbirth." She actually said that!
I feel like going back and taking a strip out of her - what a wretched thing to think and tell a labouring woman!


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## Nan'sMom (May 23, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *tireesix* 
Am I the only person who does care about being naked in front of people while birthing??????

I havee seen so many people say 'you just don't care when its happening', but I did and do every time. It makes me feel embarassed, it affects my labours, its just uncomfortable.

I think it's ridiculous that people would presume to tell others what their labor will be like and how they will feel. For me, being naked was an issue when there was a midwife and doula around and I wore a t-shirt the whole time. For my second birth there was just me and intermittently dh and dd so naked was awesome!


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## newmama8824 (Jul 8, 2007)

I don't let ANYONE see my naked. I have serious issues. But when I was in labor, I was kind of weary at first but I got naked. I don't really remember how that happened either, maybe because I got in the tub... Who knows, I refused to take my bra off though. I remember my midwife saying when I was an 8 "Would you like to help to take your bra off so you can feed the baby after he comes out?" I just shook my head NOOO. I really surprised myself though, I was a lot more comfortable than I thought I would be.


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## UrbanSimplicity (Oct 26, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Veritaserum* 
You're not weird.

I think it has a lot to do with the fact that (i'm assuming) at your birth you were the *only* naked person....there's a lot of vulnerability there, never mind the fact that you are the subject of so much attention and probably wanting to writhe around in unusual positions. Anyway, just a random thought since I've traveled to naturist (nude) resorts (family friendly, no sexual undertones) and one of the rules is usually that you must be naked. Because even in a place like that, people who ARE comfortable with their nudity can feel a little funny if they are the odd one out. (like those dreams where you forgot to put your pants on.)


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## DBZ (Aug 9, 2005)

It's one of the reasons why I am reluctant to to get in a shower or tub during labor or birth. I have major body image issues and I just can't do it. I used to be comfortable in my own skin, but I've gained a lot of weight even without being pregnant.


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## LianneM (May 26, 2004)

I didn't labor naked with DS and don't plan to this time either. I didn't care about being exposed by the time I was pushing but I kept a sports bra on, and I was in water as well which helped me I think.


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## ChristianMomOf2 (Jul 30, 2007)

I don't plan to labor or birth naked! I will have on a short tank top and a very stretchy skirt that can either be pulled up or off at the last minute. I'll even be wearing those in the tub.

I don't want to wear a bra because it's restrictive to me.

I picked this to wear when I have the baby because it's something I'm comfortable sleeping in or wearing around the house when I'm home... it covers me, but is easily removable. DH prefers this too, he prefers my body something that's for him to see, not tons of people. Although we do understand that they'll see me at some point!

Your NOT crazy!


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## SublimeBirthGirl (Sep 9, 2005)

I was one of those who didn't care at all, which is odd because I'm usually very modest. I was more comfortable in every way during my UC though, because only my husband was there and he's seen me naked plenty of times.


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## SublimeBirthGirl (Sep 9, 2005)

I was one of those who didn't care at all, which is odd because I'm usually very modest. I was more comfortable in every way during my UC though, because only my husband was there and he's seen me naked plenty of times.


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## the_lissa (Oct 30, 2004)

I did care too, but most of it is if I don't at least wear a bra I am physically uncomfortable.


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## Smokering (Sep 5, 2007)

Yeah, I'm not crazy about the concept! I've never 'done' labour before, so who knows? Maybe I'll lose all inhibitions as the majority of women claim to. I wouldn't be surprised if I didn't, though.

I'll be waterbirthing (I hope), so that will give me a little privacy at least. I haven't decided yet what I'll wear on my top--I don't wear a bra for comfort/health reasons, and none of my tank tops fit me any more! I think I have an exceedingly unglamorous bikini top somewhere (don't ask why I bought that, as I wouldn't be seen dead in a bikini!)--maybe I'll dig it out. Of course, it's all a trifle moot because as soon as the baby's born, I'll want to do the breast crawl/skin-to-skin thing, which will mean stripping off anyway.

So yeah, it's not something I'm thrilled about. I'll probably only have two midwives and DH present, although one of the midwives was thinking about calling in a third--who I've never even met yet!--'just in case', which is _not_ an idea that thrills me to the bone. I really get how some people are more comfortable UCing, frankly. I'm not quite at that point--first baby, DH would be horrified, etc--but I get it! Things like being examined for dilation and afterwards for tearing... women speak of it very casually, but I worry about it! I'm not good at abandoning my dignity, I don't like showing pain in front of others or feeling 'unglamorous' (red in the face, sweaty etc). So... I have decided that labour might not be all fun and games.


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## onetwoten (Aug 13, 2007)

Even though my first birth is probably 3 years away, this is the part of labor I dread most... not the pain, not the length... I dread other people seeing me naked, and worse- staring intently at MY private parts. I don't even like physicals at the Dr's office, and those only last a few minutes. It's definately a consideration in why I want a homebirth WITHOUT lots of people and extras there, and especially why I'm fighting for a UC. Besides- I love seeing labor and birth photos and want to be able to show my own- which I wuldn't do if I were nude in them.


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## tireesix (Apr 27, 2006)

I think the worst thing is the memory from my first birth.

I refused to have an episiotomy and from that point onwards the Ob treated me like crap. It was an unnecessary ventouse delivery, he attached the suction cap and told me to give a small push, by this point, I had had two epidurals (first was placecd wrong) and a spinal) and while I had started to kinda feel stuff, at the same time it wasn't enough to for me to be in control. So I gave what I thought was a small push (it was a small push, babe was crowning, there was no need for the ventouse, MW had decided I was too tireed when the reality was, she was tired) and babe came flying out. Babe was placed on my chest and the the Ob stared at my nether region and stated 'I said a small push, look, you have made yourself tear'.......... And that memory is so vivid. Its not like he sewed me up right either (DH says it was like watching someone repair some old sail, absolutely no caree and I did suffer for months afterwoulds)...........

I had worn a nighty that birtth but I still felt uncomfortable, people came in the room without knocking, spoke about me behind my back (apparenttly I was a wuss and the first epi had been sited properly, in actual fact, the anaesthesiologist showed them it had come out)........... I just fel so bloody violated the whole birth, ALL of it was so unnecessary and no amount of clothing would have made me feel safe but the whole experieence has done its damage and now I just can't heal the damage they did to me.

I thought a nice home birth would help fix it but it hasn't. I was ready to leave it at 2 children but we now have a very unexpected third on the way and I again plan a home birth, but already, I feel naked and uncomfortable.

Maybee its not the fact that I am naked, maybe it has more to do with the fact that I don't feel as though I am being seen as a person and maybe me wearing clothes during labour is more to remind the people around me that actually, I am a person and deserve to be treated like one..........

Believee it or not, I have had counselling for this too but I guess its all been ingrained on me on a primitive level.

My first experiencee wasn't as bad as a lot of peoples but then I shouldn't be comparing really, bottom line is that I was treated inhumanely and I had totally unnecessary procedures with left both physical and emotional scars.

DH thinks we should just go UC, but I am concerned due to medical issues. I had a PPH last time, I am at higher risk of them and they do scare the crap out of me and I think I would prefer having someone about for that. But I guess I could wait until late in labour...........


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## sapphire_chan (May 2, 2005)

I think your dh is absolutely right that you could UC just fine, and calling in a professional for the very end of the birth as a precaution against pph (while also looking into things you can do immediately, such as various herbs) is really no different than planning to go to the hospital for a rhogam shot after the birth like some people have had to do.

I don't know that it's nakedness that's the entire issue. It sounds to me like you've had one birth where you were dehumanized and another where you were a spectacle and it's time for you to get one where you can just be yourself. You're previous experiences make me feel it unlikely that you'll find a care provider whose presence won't hinder your births.

Since worrying about pph would also hinder your births, make arrangements to take care of that--but that doesn't mean you've got to have other people staring at you.

(As a side note, there are a couple ladies in the UC forum who would probably love to have a bottle of your local water to see if it helps their dhs come on board as readily as yours did.







)


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## tireesix (Apr 27, 2006)

LOL, I think Dh was a bit unsure of the idea of a homebirth with our first but he kinda came round and then we ended up with an induction. After what he heard and saw there he was like 'never again'....... He still gets really angry about it and it was nearly 4 years ago now......

So ummmmm yeah, quite lucky thats hes so on board with whattever I decide!!!!!!!


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## erin_brycesmom (Nov 5, 2005)

I care too. So far, I've never birthed naked although I'd really like to so that my baby and I can have uninterrupted skin to skin contact immediately. This is just another reason that UC appeals to me *SO* very much.


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## accountclosed3 (Jun 13, 2006)

i care. it's partly why i'm Ucing anyway. i don't want an audience as it is, and i don't want to be nude and exposing my genitals tot hat audience.


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## Changed (Mar 14, 2004)

I think I'll care. I'm not that comfortable with being naked anyway so in front of a crowd who is just waiting for me to do _something_... Clothes are good. I'm thinking of buying a gown for labor and a nice nursing set for right after. Something roomy but short would be nice.


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## pixiepunk (Mar 11, 2003)

i really thought i'd care, i'm generally pretty modest, but ended up totally naked during both births - clothes just felt soooo uncomfortable. but i can understand feeling weird if i had an "audience." for the most part, my birth attendants have always given me a lot of space, often staying in the other room, letting me and DH be alone together to do what we needed to do. i think that made a huge difference - i'm not sure how i would've felt if i had a dozen eyes upon me constantly.

the most important thing is for you to do what works for *you* - whatever that is at any given moment. if you want clothes on, by all means wear clothes. if you feel you need to remove them to be comfortable and there are others in the room, ask them to leave - or better yet, make sure your DH knows that will be your preference ahead of time and have *him* ask everyone to leave the room. do whatever you need to do to be relaxed and comfortable - don't forget that when you're giving birth it is all about you.


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## Ruthla (Jun 2, 2004)

I never had "so many folks" around when I was in labor, period.

First birth was my midwife, her apprentice (that I'd met at prenatal visits), my doula, and DH- nobody else was there.

Second birth was (in order of them showing up while I was in labor) my toddler, my best friend, my midwife, and my DH.

3rd birth was me, with DP and both DDs in the next room.

I might have felt very differently about being naked during birth if I felt like there were tons of people around that I didn't want there.


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## Changed (Mar 14, 2004)

I'll have my MW, her assistant, my husband, my mom, sister, best friend and my kids. Possibly a birth photographer. Really, if it were anyone but me in a room alone, I'd want something on.


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## NatureMama3 (Feb 25, 2004)

I do care. it's why I'm giving birth at home with only my immediate family (hubby/kids) present and a midwife downstairs should she arrive on time. I do need to be nude during labor/delivery but I don't want the whole world privvy to it.


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## loraxc (Aug 14, 2003)

I didn't want to be totally naked. I was clothed completely till I got in the tub, when I had on a long swimsuit top and no bottoms. I took off the top to nurse after birth, but asked for a shirt once DS had nursed. For whatever reason, I am actually less self-conscious about exposing my genitals than my breasts--I guess the breasts feel more personal to me somehow.


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## RockStarMom (Sep 11, 2005)

I didn't care. I've never really been modest about my body though.


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