# 2 1/2 yr old keeps touching himself



## sunnyCA (Mar 2, 2009)

I have no idea if this is "normal" or not so please let me know if any of you have experience this before. My DS is 2 1/2 and has done a great job of learning to use the potty. He now wears underpants, but during "down time" watching a video etc, his starts to touch himself. He then will say his peepee hurts. While at the pediatrician the last time we asked about it and she examined his penis and said that everything looks normal and that it is common for young boys to get erections. However, this seems to now be a daily occurance. I am worried about making too much of an issue out of it and making the situation worse. However, I also don't want him doing this at daycare or at other people's homes. Anyone else had some similar experiences or have any suggestions?


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## Llyra (Jan 16, 2005)

It really is very normal. I wouldn't worry about it too much. The worst thing you can do is give him a big reaction, and start him believing that it's 1. a way to get a big reaction out of you and thereby get attention or 2. something to feel ashamed of. He's discovered it feels good and relaxing, and so he does it when he wants to feel that way. It's not sexual, not at his age. It's entirely innocent.

If he's complaining it hurts afterward, it's possible he's irritating the skin a bit, or the erection feels odd to him. You don't have to do anything about that except maybe point out the reason to him. He'll figure out all on his own that he needs to not do it too much so he doesn't hurt himself.

I think our only role in this situation is to help them learn about privacy and boundaries. As he gets closer to 3, he'll start having a bit more impulse control, and you can start teaching him that this is something he must do in private.

The daycare people will know how to distract him and redirect him gently, without calling too much attention to it. Probably every boy they've ever cared for has done it at some time or another. I know my son does. And my baby brother did, too, I can remember. I know it's embarrassing to us, but really I am quite sure that it is something they'll know how to handle. If you're worried, you can maybe bring up the subject with them. I'll bet they'll be really reassuring.

And when he's with you, if you feel the time and place is inappropriate, you can do the same-- just ask him to stop, saying, "this is not a private place," and offer him some other distraction. He'll start to pick up, as he gets a bit older, that there are social expectations about this, all by himself, the same way kids learn not to pick their noses in front of other kids.


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## dawncayden (Jan 24, 2006)

VERY NORMAL!
I think it would be not normal if he didn't do it









When ds gets too rough, I mention being gentle with ourselves.
It also isn't a bad age to start talking about doing certain things in private, in bed, in the bathroom etc.


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## Drummer's Wife (Jun 5, 2005)

It is normal... and he's going to do it for the rest of his life!


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## sunnygir1 (Oct 8, 2007)

I don't have a boy (yet), but every little boy I've ever been around as they were growing up has gone through a phase where his penis was almost always in his hand...at home anyway. It is completely normal and harmless...unless he hurts himself. I agree with pps, ignore it, talk to him about being gentle, distract him when it is an inappropriate place/time. I think it is fine to have boundaries..."no hands in the pants at meal time" is a good one.









My dd is 2.5 and discovered her vagina this summer. She hasn't really done much touching except at home, where she is often only partially clothed (by her choice/insistence, of course). I wouldn't be concerned about her doing it at daycare at all, as it is completely normal, and not a negative reflection on the home environment in any way.

HTH


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## erratum (May 26, 2008)

When he says that his peepee hurts, he might just be referring to the sensation of having an erection. When this first started happening to my guy he'd get this really concerned look on his face and go "OH NO! PENIS!!!"
After I suppressed some giggles, I would just nonchalantly tell him that it was ok, it was just an erection, and it would go away in a little while. That seemed to make him feel better.


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## rightkindofme (Apr 14, 2008)

Sounds like he is figuring out that bodies are cool.







It's all normal and such.


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## pantrygirl (Jan 5, 2009)

It's super normal.

I was at a bbq over the weekend and another mom was saying how her 2.5 year old girl has discovered herself as well and that she does this pretty frequently.

DH was holding our 14 mth old at the time and the look of horror on his face when she said that and when I responded that I read this is normal and exploratory, was classic. He covered our daughter's ears and ran out the room.


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## SubliminalDarkness (Sep 9, 2009)

Very normal! I just tell my DS that we only do that when we're by ourselves, not when others are around.


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## Lisa81 (Nov 26, 2009)

Very normal my baby also has erections sometimes
And he isn't yet 1yr old


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## LiLStar (Jul 7, 2006)

..and he will NEVER grow out of it









..except to learn the time and the place, lol


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## paakbaak (Jan 24, 2007)

normal and healthy. it´s good time to teach him not to do in in public and not to let anyone else do it for him, and he´ll be fine. he sais it hurts because of the discomfort, my boy is almost 4 and he sais many things except that it hurts!


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## JBaxter (May 1, 2005)

Momma of 4 boys... VERY VERY normal. My 13 month old has started doing it on naked time.


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