# How to find a foreskin-friendly pediatrician?



## Jerlin (Apr 19, 2010)

I'm so frustrated. I can't find a foreskin-friendly pediatrician. Maybe I don't know how to look. But I've called pediatricians' offices and ask the receptionist, nurse, office manager, etc. if the pediatrician knows how to care for an intact boy. And when they say of course, I ask them about retracting the foreskin. All of them said yes, in order to see what's going on. Please help me find a foreskin-friendly pediatrician. Any websites I can look at to search for such a doctor in my area? A million thanks!


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## becca_howell (Jan 3, 2009)

It's hard to find a doctor who knows about propper care of an intact penis. I've had to take it upon myself to give our pediatrician a letter explaining that my son is intact and the propper care for an intact penis. I also state in the letter that any diaper-free examinations will be done with him in my arms and I am the only one allowed to touch his genitals. Period. I am also ready to grab any hands who try to retract his foreskin.


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## tammylsmith (Jul 11, 2008)

You could look for a doctor from somewhere other than America. My doctor is from India. He is intact and is son is as well, so he has been a valuable resource for good information (he helped me convince my dh to stop panicking about leaving ds intact).


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## A&A (Apr 5, 2004)

Post in Finding Your Tribe.


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## AnnDMFT (Dec 18, 2010)

I joined the forum just to come in here and ask this exact question.

I thought I had found an intact friendly pediatrician, only to discover at my son's 1-year check that she is planning on retracting his foreskin at age 5 and that her belief is still that circ'ing is best. ( She is not knowledgeable about the foreskin AT ALL!! I'm so disappointed because, other than this, she provides great care.

So, the search is on for another one.....

It was recommended on The WHOLE Network on FB that I come to the Mothering Forums and ask in here if anyone has one in my area (Lafayette, IN).


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## Galatea (Jun 28, 2004)

Eh, I don't worry about it. I just tell them at every baby exam not to try to retract his foreskin, and they don't, and that is it. I know that I will not be circumcising them for any reason, so I don't really give a fig what they know or not know - and maybe I can educate them in the process.


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## Lauren82 (Feb 26, 2007)

Post in the Find your Tribe forum to inquire about an intact friendly ped in your area.

You are the parent and you have every right to tell your ped to not touch your son's penis AT ALL and she will not be touching it now or when he turns five. That's terrible of her!

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *AnnDMFT*
> 
> I joined the forum just to come in here and ask this exact question.
> 
> ...


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## erin23kate (Apr 16, 2009)

I agree with PP, see if you can find a doctor who wasn't born in the USA. Our pediatrician is from Poland - she actually squealed with delight when she found out our son was intact. She has an accent, and I love hearing her say, "I am so klad dat you left heem perrrrfect!" I also find that non-US doctors are more flexible with vaccines, since their native countries often have less restrictive requirements.


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## AnnDMFT (Dec 18, 2010)

Definitely something I need to look into!


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## becca_howell (Jan 3, 2009)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *AnnDMFT*
> 
> I joined the forum just to come in here and ask this exact question.
> 
> ...


Oh, my word. PLEASE stand up for your son! She can't retract his foreskin if you don't let her touch his penis! Although, if she still beleives circ'ing is best, I think it's time to look around. Check around for an API meeting near you too, they may know where to go.


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## TyrantOfTheWeek (May 25, 2009)

I second checking in your tribe. I found my foreskin friendly ped on accident really. I watched as he did my sons' exams and noticed he didn't even touch them there (WIN!!). All the other docs in the practice go for that part of my boys almost automatically. I now only take the boys to that one doctor.


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## circuitsndaisies (Apr 24, 2009)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Galatea*
> 
> Eh, I don't worry about it. I just tell them at every baby exam not to try to retract his foreskin, and they don't, and that is it. I know that I will not be circumcising them for any reason, so I don't really give a fig what they know or not know - and maybe I can educate them in the process.


I agree. I have taken a laid back initial approach with our dr. With the exception of declining the circ, I never said word one about his penis nor did they. During the early days, when they did diaper area checks (to check for descended testicles) I also said nothing but watched to make sure that they did not touch his penis. None did. We started out with a family doc (conservative, circ loving midwest) then moved and we are now at a large ped group and have seen several of the providers there. I figure if I treat his penis and foreskin as a non-issue, so will they. We don't see the doctor based on their foreskin philosophy. We see them for sicknesses, and his penis is not sick. LOL. If it ever comes up, then we would discuss it. At our last visit, the doc opened DS's diaper and as soon as he did mumbled "oh good" and immediately closed it back up. That was that. Were they weird about it, I would not leave the practice. I would make every effort to find out why they were misinformed and try to open a line of discussion to change their thinking.

I feel like that until intact penises are treated as normal, they won't be considered as such. Making a big deal out of a normal penis, IMO, is not treating it as normal. Maybe I'm just lucky. . .I dunno.


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## circuitsndaisies (Apr 24, 2009)

Let me also add, that I was able to take DH with me to DS's initial appointments with our providers. I think a doc is less likely to say something about my son's penis with DH in the room, even if they do have an opinion one way or the other. They don't know if DH is circ'd or not and likely don't want to risk insulting him in the process. Just a thought.


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## erin23kate (Apr 16, 2009)

Another (brand new) alternative:

http://www.thewholenetwork.org/intact-friendly-doctors.html

If you know of one, please email their name in so the list can grow.


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