# Cesarean support circle IV (October 16- )



## ladylee (Nov 20, 2001)

A link to the previous thread:

http://mothering.com/discussions/sho...969#post867969


----------



## gossamer (Feb 28, 2002)

I finally got to ask my OB why she did a clasiscal cut. She said because I was only 24 weeks preggo, there was no uterus lower in my abdomen to incise. So she had to go up. I accept her explanation, but I am still sad about it.

She said I have a 3-5% chance of uterine rupture if I labor. I asked her what would happen, what were the consequences. Her eyes kind of bugged out and she said "Of a Uterine Rupture?" I said "Yes, of a uterine rupture." Apparently I could bleed out, the baby would probably die from placental abruption and I would probably wind up with a hystorectomy. Joy.

Gossamer


----------



## Peppermint (Feb 12, 2003)

Gossamer

My OBs were totally ok with me trying to VBAC (As I've mentioned before), and at first *I* had some concerns (I have a regular lower cut, but still) when I asked about the risks of rupture I was told that basically I could lose my uterus, but I swear, no one ever told me that the baby could have died, and when I found out later, I was really mad that I hadn't known that. You see those who are pushing VBAC (And God Bless them, they help a lot of women avoid unnecessary sections), but they do not/will not talk about the risks or horror of uterine rupture (except to say how rare it is-true, and how not having labor inducing drugs will decrease the risk-true), they just never say that the baby could die as a result (it makes sense I just didn't know it), and when I was having #2, I agreed to VBAC without labor inducing drugs, and in the end that was my choice - do I allow the drugs (with only a midwife present, and the OB a mere few minute drive away) or go for another section? I went for the section. (sorry- C-birth







)

It is a hard thing, esp. when you have a tendency to all things natural, but I have said before, all of the mamas on the c-support threads make their own decisions and educate themselves, and always do what is best for their own babies with the info. they have.

I am sorry again for your loss, and the loss of possibility of ever having a vaginal birth, you have been through so much, (((HUGS))).


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

gossamer--sorry about your news









I was told right up front the possiblity of uterine rupture and baby death and the like. I will not be monitored the entire time during labor (unless I get the one ob that requires it) But I'm birthing in a birthing center...that is attached to a hospital L&D Ward. You would never know you wre in a hosiptal either. ANd I am closer to the OR than I would be in a regular labor room. If the bc was not attached to a l&d I don't know that I would vbac in a bc.

I'm hoping to avoid another c/b but I know it might happen and I think that that realization is a good thing in my case,. Otherwise I feel like I would be fooling myself to think that nothing could go wrong. With my ds c/b was never in my mind...till it happened.


----------



## ladylee (Nov 20, 2001)

gossamer--


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

I was watching either the today show or the other one and Matt Lauer was talking to Dustin Hoffman. Hoffman said, I heard that your a dad again! blah blah blah...did you guys use lamaaze? Lauer said, Actually it was a planned cesaerian







(he said it with a smile) and Hoffman said, Reeaaly (it was one of those drawn out reallys) my wife had an unplanned cesaerian. Is your wife recovering well? Lauer said, Of course and our daughter is beautiful!

I just thought it was interesting....


----------



## sarahmae1 (Nov 11, 2002)

Hello. I had an emergeny c-section w/ my ds and most likely will be having a repeat c-section w/ this baby. I have researched and considered vbac but I just don't feel comfortable with it. My doctors have made it very clear that it is my choice. So far, I have not given them my final decision, but I feel that a repeat c-section is the right choice for me.
Does anyone have an opinion as to what is better - an epidural or a spinal? I was put to sleep w/ my ds and I know I don't want that again if I don't have to. I want to be awake to hear my baby's first cries and to be able to nurse asap after the surgery.


----------



## lilirose (Feb 19, 2003)

sorry, having to remove all posts with personal info due to an online stalker.


----------



## Peppermint (Feb 12, 2003)

I am also curious about what kind of anesthesia. I had spinals both times, and didn't feel the cutting







which is truly my main concern, but I did feel the "pressure" but I understood that that would be felt either way







:

I also had severe itching the second time, and also they had the adjust the table to "bring it up" at first, then it was too far, as my breathing got funny, so back down- it was frustrating, but I had a great anesthesiologist both times, and am hoping for another great one!

While we are on the subject of spinal vs. epidural, does anyone else have any suggestions for pain relief afterwards? I had asked about it in the previous thread, just before we switched, and I'd like as many opinions as possible.

Also, I say "you go daddy" to Matt Lauer! I like the fact that he didn't make any apologies for how his daughter was born, and didn't give any hint of regret about it, that is what any wife and child need, validation from daddy, esp. when he is talking to so many people.


----------



## ladylee (Nov 20, 2001)

I have no basis for comparison as I had epidurals both times. No problems with either birth. The first birth I was completely out of it due to laboring through the night, the second birth I was nursing my daugther within twenty minutes.

Re: celebrity cesarean deliveries in general-I'm always interested to see those who have the time to judge celebrities that have cesareans--sometimes insinuating that the celebrity chose to have it done for reasons of vanity or convenience-which blows my mind! This is the least vain and convenient thing to go through, isn't it? Yet somehow that perception carries over to the rest of us. I'll never understand a woman feeling the need to marginalize another woman's birth experience.


----------



## Hikaru (Sep 1, 2002)

i had spinal both times...it hurts like hell when they're sticking you in the back, and it varies how much sensation remains...with DS's birth it was like the lower half of my body just went away. With DD, I felt it. It wasn't painful but I got bad cramps in my legs which got worse because I couldn't move my legs!
On the up side, I was awake and able to see the baby right away. In fact with DD, I was the one who yelled "It's a girl!"
and I nursed her on the table after they sewed me up.

Pain relief after....my suggestion is take full advantage of painkillers and don't act macho (or would that be "macha?")
I decided it was more important to be functional and fully enjoy my baby, and it really made things easier the second time around.
By the fourth day I didn't need painkillers anymore.
Oh yes, and lie down as much as you can, it's the most comfortable way to nurse!


----------



## anabean (May 1, 2003)

hi ladies,

just checking in. my baby was born on 10/14 via emergency c-sec. i'm still gathering my thoughts about it all to write the birth story. glad to see this thread and thank to the ones who referred me to it.

i will be back soon.


----------



## Lovebugsmommy (Nov 16, 2002)

this is my latest obsession lately so please forgive me if it's too personal... how may of you sectioned ladies had the vertical cut v.s horizontal (bikini) i have the vertical cut and i know it is rare but just how rare is it .

(i had a "natural spontious vaginal birth followed by a horrendous experience that led to a life threating necessity to have section 6 wks later.)


----------



## Peppermint (Feb 12, 2003)

I had the bikini cut both times, and intend to this time as well.

Can you explain the last line in you post (if you don't mind) I do not follow what happened to you (only if you want to share).


----------



## Hikaru (Sep 1, 2002)

Here in Japan most cesarians are done with a vertical incision.
Women do VBAC with vertical incisions here but of course they would do it in a hospital because of the increased risk of rupture.
I have a horizontal incision because I insited on it...the doctor went along with my wishes but acted like I was being vain and silly.


----------



## ladylee (Nov 20, 2001)

Congratulations on the birth of your daughter, Ana-my daughter was born a few days later! Hope your recovery is going well, and I look forward to hearing your story!

Lovebugsmommy-I've had two horizontals.


----------



## Lovebugsmommy (Nov 16, 2002)

Jess7396... (you asked







)
*This is what my husband wrote into work...*
Its a long story so Ill try to bullet point it.

1. On Thursday evening my wife was checked into ***** Hospital because of episodes of sever pain in her uterus and a 103 fever(she rated it higher than birth pain)
2. I spent Thursday night with the baby sleeping in the hospital next to her.
3. 3:30 am (Thursday night/Friday morning) Holly has the worst episode ever. I don't sleep any more that night
4. Friday morning I hand carried her MRI to another concoctor in Modestoto look at to see if he could figure more out.
He came to the same conclusion that our doctor did. There is 'schmutz' in there. Stuff in the uterus that has to come out.
5. The plan was to do another DNC or DNE and remove the stuff around Tuesday after a few days of antibiotics.
6. Friday night she spiked a fever again.
7. Saturday 10 am they did the DNC. The doctor also did a Hysteroscopi(he stuck a camera in and took pictures)
8. 11 am the Result: There is something big 3" or so still in there. Plan: After a month or less we will do a c-section type operation to look at it and possibly remove it.
9. 11:30 am Holly's blood pressure is deathly low. They cant give her nearly enough pain medication because of this.
10. 2 pm Her blood pressure is up to 90/40. So she is stable but still in lots of pain.
11. 5 pm Her blood pressure is dropping again. They give her 1 unit of blood but its slow. More pain.
12. 6 pm Doctor rates her condition as 'Crappy'. Her lips are almost transparent. Still incredible pain.
13. 7 pm Doctor says we are going to do the c-section surgery with in the hour. I have to sign a paper that says 'Possible Hysterectomy incase the doctor has to remove the uterus to save holly.
14. 8 pm She enters surgery.
15. 9 pm nurse comes out and says everything is looking good. They just have to put her back together now. They removed the thing and still don't know exactly what it is. They also fixed a hole in her uterus that was leaking blood. It was probably introduced from the DNC earlier that day, but 'the thing' was blocking the view of the back of the uterus so the doctor could not see it with the camera.
16. 11 pm They finished and holly's blood pressure goes back up right away.
17. 12 am (Saturday night/Sunday morning) Her vital signs are stable. Blood test comes back looking much better. She says she feels much better not as much pain. She is also drugged up good now. Finally.
18. 12:30 am I decide to go home. I drive over to my sister's hous to take care of Sophie(our baby). I don't sleep much just hold our baby.
19. 10 am Sunday we go and visit. She is looking much better compared to her earlier state that is.
20. 11:30 am we leave so holly can sleep.
21. The afternoon was a mad house at my place, many relatives here begging to help with the baby in some way. They all finally leave around 8 pm
22. 11 pm. Holly calls. The doctor is there again. He is going to give her 2 more units of blood because her hemoglobin is still low.
23. The baby sleeps from 10:30 pm to 4:30 am(6 hours) The most sleep I have gotten in a long time
24. Holly seems stable today. We should have results back today or tomorrow to find out what the thing was.

I am plan to go visit Holly today again.
I have everything I need and will probably do some work, if just to take
my mind off the events of the last few days.
We don't know how long holly will be in the hospital, but she is now recovering
from a c-section.
The up shot is she get at least 6 more weeks off work to stay home with Sophie.

*This is from myonline journal*
Just a short note to let you know I'm doing much much better. I was released today... the "thing" has been removed... the official diagnosis is not given yet as to what it is but we My husband my self and my grandparents all believe it to be the same exact thing. We believe it to be a degenerating baby.
From what jeffrey saw in the pictures from the surgery it could have easily been another baby. It breaks my heart to think that but it makes sense. from the clots I was passing with tissue and the type of clotting it isn't impossible to believe. I think the baby (sophies twin) died around 32 weeks... erwhelmmed with the love from all of you. You women really did
help pull me through. Thank you so much for all the caring praying and support
that you have given to my husband and myself.

As for me and the whole ordeal I don't remember the really bad parts...
I know my bp got as low as 20 over 4 and we were really happy when we got up to 90 over 40 I had an awesome night nurse who really kept me alive I believe. I sufferred some incredible pain... much worse than I ever believed to be lived though, and now I know I can. I have become much more vocal about what I want how I want it and what I expect from persons... especially
from the medical field... I was finally allowed to go home after a day of crappy care from some stupid nurses... and now I haven't had a fever for over 24 hours. and my pain is so mild... just the incision. I have 8 more weeks off of work... to stay home with my daughter, I feel very lucky to have my life and this extra special time with my daughter.

my dr believes that i will be able to have children again in about 6 weeks i'll have a ct scan and he'll squirt dye into my tubes and uterus to see how it all looks.

I went out to lunch with Jeffrey today and we talked about our future... don't ever forget what a blessing it is to be able to take talking about the future ... we just want to face it together, no matter what we just feel so fortunate to have this type of relationship.
Thank you so much Ladies for everything...I may not post for a day or two
(just recovery )


----------



## Peppermint (Feb 12, 2003)

Thank you so much for sharing your story, it was frightening and I was crying just reading it, you are truly Blessed to be alive, and it sounds like you have taken only the best from the experience, I applaud you for that, you are an amazing woman, and have been through so much (((HUGS))).


----------



## musikat (Oct 30, 2002)

I'm so glad to see this thread on here! I'm new here, although not to the mothering boards in general. I'm 28 weeks with my second son, and my first son was a c-section birth -- emergency, after 48 hours of unsuccesful induction including pitocin, breaking the water,etc. I only ever got to 5 cm dialated. I had preeclampsia and my son was born -- very healthy -- at 36 weeks. Now with this one, my doctor, whom I trust, strongly advices against a VBAC because of the chance of rupture and because she doesn't think I would dialate. I was unsure at first but what finally decided me was the statistics on rupture and the consequences. I am against having an amnio (save in the most dire circumstances) because of the small risk of miscarriage. The stats are the same for rupturing with a VBAC. So why risk it?

All that said, I have a question for you ladies. I am trying to make this (planned) birth as pleasant and "normal" as possible. With my first son I didn't get to see him for two hours, then only for a few minutes of breastfeeding (it was very late and they insisted he go to the nursery that night). I know that part of the reason I didn't see him for so long was that he was four weeks early and they were monitoring his breathing closely. I'm hoping that won't be the case this time. Did you get to hold your baby fairly soon after the c-section (right away in the recovery room)? For how long? What about rooming in and breastfeeding? I had a very rocky start breastfeeding last time and am hoping to do better this time (long story). Any advice on how I can make this birth go the way I want (Of course, barring any emergencies or unexpected problems)?


----------



## ladylee (Nov 20, 2001)

Hi musikat-I had a planned cesarean on 9/19, and my hospital is so pro-breastfeeding that they brought my daughter to me immediately in post-op, with the lactation consultant in tow to see if I needed any help. I had spoken to my doctor beforehand & expressed that I wanted to nurse asap, but it really wasn't necessary. And it was just assumed my daughter would room in with me.

Have you written a birth plan? Maybe you need to put your wishes in writing. I'm sure they'll work with you provided there are no emergencies, as you say.

I wish you all the best, please come here for more support if you need it. PS-I also had an emergency c the first time-the planned one a month ago was a completely different experience. I feel it resolved much of the pain I experienced the first time.


----------



## Hikaru (Sep 1, 2002)

I chose a birthing clinic where they ONLY do rooming in, even after a cesarian. The first night I had to call the nurse ten times to come to the room and change the baby's diaper or move her to the other side of me and help latch her onto my breast. I had an IV and a catheter and couldn't do anything for myself. It was hard but no way would I have gone to a hospital where they'd take my baby away from me. unless it was an emergency of course.


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

My son had some small breathing issues as well but they resolved by the time they stitched me up. He never left the room. Dh had the option to hold him while I was being stitched but ds was calm and just looking around so he stayed by my side (not to mention he was a nervous first time dad







) Anyway, when I was wheeled out of the or ds was in my arms. He experienced his first elevator ride at about 30 minutes old. He was in my arms in rocovery, where the nurse encouraged us to try and nurse. He latched on right away (even though another 3 horus later he couldn't figure it out







: )

But he only went to the nursery when I asked, which was a couple times cause he didn't sleep at all and I was exhausted. But their policy was as soon as baby starts to cry he comes to me. Even with bottlefed babes they went to mom when upset. Which was fine but then sending him to nursery was kinda pointless.


----------



## SMPH (Apr 25, 2003)

Hello ladies!

I wanted to stop by and introduce myself.

The birth of our son will most likely be a cesarean birth. He has been breech since probably 18 weeks. A 31ish week u/s showed he was still breech. We attempted a version last Friday to turn him but he refused to budge.

So, we currently have a c/s scheduled for almost 40 weeks (this may change). If I go into labor before then (I'm as bit over 37 weeks now) and he hasn't turned on his own we will have a c/s. He has a big head (DH's family trait







) and we don't want to risk a vaginal, breech birth.

We are almost done with our Bradley classes and may still get to "use the info" if he turns on his own but I'm glad I've had some time now to "mourn" the loss of my "dream birth". I think I've finally come to grips with it and I'm so happy this thread is here to help!

We asked the nurse at the version about anesthesia and she said it would be a spinal. I didn't realize there was a choice so we will discuss this with the OB this week.

Thank you for sharing your stories!


----------



## Hikaru (Sep 1, 2002)

My son was breech until 37 weeks. Acupuncture was very effective in getting him to turn head down. I still ended up having a cesarian at 42 weeks for other reasons. Anyway,
if you can find an acupuncturist in your area you might want to give it a try, so you can at least say you eliminated that possible cause for a cesarian. Acupuncture isn't painful BTW, if it's done right!


----------



## Lovebugsmommy (Nov 16, 2002)

jess... thank you I don't think i'm any stronger than anyone else you know. we all take something different from our experiences and it shapes us. But i do thank you for the compliment


----------



## ladylee (Nov 20, 2001)

Sigh. I have to stop reading certain threads in this forum-just seems to be a strong judgmental energy rising up lately pertaining to cesareans. Which is why I don't like being in Birth and Beyond.

Anyhoo--how are the recovering mamas doing? And the expecting mamas?


----------



## Peppermint (Feb 12, 2003)

ladylee

I don't read anything in this forum, except this thread









I am trying to prepare for my c-birth in January, mentally and physically. Trying to focus on the birth I will be having, as opposed to wasting time thinking how it could be different.


----------



## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Ladylee, I know what you're talking about. I really get upset by women who don't know all the facts about my birth or my situation but insist on making judgments and hurtful blanket statements. Sigh.

I'm due in May. I'm going with a ob practice, because CNMs no longer deliver in my town, and I don't want a homebirth. If I *really* wanted a CNM, I could drive to another town, but the surrounding hospital stats are not nearly as good.

I've discussed VBAC at great length with 2 of the obs (both of whom I really like... I've also met with a 3rd, who was an idiot, but ironically and thankfully, she's pg and will be on leave when I'm due). So far, we're in agreement, and I've just been trying to really get "the lay of the land." No induction (or augmentation)... either I go into labor and give birth, or I have a C. This relieves me... I found the idea of an induction before my C with ds pretty scary, and obviously, the risk is higher now. The ob I saw most recently said that if I go late, they'll probably want to do a C at 41 wks. I told her I'd rather be able to go to 42, and she said we could play it by ear (and by non-stress test). She also said that on a scale of 0-10, "bad VBAC candidate" to "great VBAC candidate" I'm somewhere in the middle (which I already knew; my midwife warned me about it, and I trust her judgment--don't want to talk about it on other threads because I don't want to get shot down--I want to mentally prepare myself for a C if I need to). That's fine. I'll do the best I can do. The way I see it, the person who would most benefit from the VBAC is my ds...

The only "issue" is that I apparently have a bleeding cyst on one of my ovaries which may have to be removed. I haven't asked yet whether the removal would affect my chances at a VBAC.

Anyway, glad this safe forum is here.


----------



## SMPH (Apr 25, 2003)

Hikaru~~We tried moxabustion and still nothing. I believe that he has a reason for being breech. We did try several other natural ways as well before the version.

Quote:

I am trying to prepare for my c-birth in January, mentally and physically. Trying to focus on the birth I will be having, as opposed to wasting time thinking how it could be different.
This is fabulous. I spent a week or so "mourning" the potential loss of my natural birth dream. Then I decided that while it was necessary for my mental health, it wasn't getting me anywhere. So, focusing on the postives was my next step.

My Bradley instructor suggested I call it my "cesarean birth" instead of a c-section. I like it.

I haven't read any other thread in here and now I don't think I will. Thanks for the heads up.


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

I guess i don't read the wrong threads or I'm just oblivious







:

I'm still planning a VBAC but can't get the nagging feeling of another c/b out of my head. Which I guess is a strike against me!


----------



## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

It's_our_family... I'm kind of feeling the same way. I'm going to do everything I can to have the VBAC, but the baby has to cooperate, too. I just feel like it would be better for *me* if I'm mentally prepared for all scenarios... one of which could be another C.


----------



## Peppermint (Feb 12, 2003)

Ladylee

You got my curiosity up and I went looking around this forum





















:







:







-hoping not to get curious again, we all need to stay where we feel supported!


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

Quote:

_Originally posted by jess7396_
*Ladylee

You got my curiosity up and I went looking around this forum





















:







:







-hoping not to get curious again, we all need to stay where we feel supported!*
Me too.....I just gonna stay here now. Except for my own questions.....


----------



## Peppermint (Feb 12, 2003)

edited out b/c I was naughty again


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

I've never gotten a pm but I'm not doing a repeat...well, not planning one...well, I'm not sure!

I didn't think this would be such a hard thing to decide. At first I was VBAC all the way...never pushing it on anyone though. I get enough things shoved in my face around here (IRL) that I don't need to do it to anyone else.

I thought about just doing a repeat but the more i think about it the more I know I have to at least try again. If I end up with a repeat I know I'll be upset and mourn all over again but I'd rather mourn what really happened and not the "it could have been"s.

It drives me nuts that ppl don't think before they write. I try not to judge anyone. I know i made mistakes with my first labor and i know that those mistakes most likely were the direct cause to y c/b but I've tried to accept it. I do, however, try to be an advocate of not inducing early for supposed reasons of "big baby" or timing. I was induced early and wish to this day I had had the patience to wait.

I'm sorry you are judged without anyone asking first.

It's the same thing I would get about circumcision (most likely)

I'm sorry but I just can't jump on every band-wagon that goes by...


----------



## sarahmae1 (Nov 11, 2002)

I've never gotten a pm from anyone regarding this (at least not yet) and I'm pretty sure I'm going to be having a repeat c-section. Perhaps it's because I usually try and make it clear in my posts on this topic that I have been researching vbac vs. repeat c-section since we started ttc this baby (over a year ago). I also make it known that my doctors are totally leaving the choice up to me, and that I feel more comfortable going w/ a repeat c-section.


----------



## ladylee (Nov 20, 2001)

:LOL I know-it's like a moth being drawn to light, isn't it? For me it's a good distraction from California wildfires and the pathetic condition of my house (not damaged, just covered in soot and ash.)

There is one member here that is very pro ICAN and I respect her immensely. If she pm'd me I'd listen. SHe would never push the info on someone, btw. I respect the women who have had a personal triumph with a VBAC and those who are working toward it. Everyone has their personal journey--and everyone has to "overcome" in their lives, take back their personal power that we tend to lose year by year--perhaps for these women birth is where that journey has been assigned to happen. My "overcoming" took place in different areas of my life-and I just wish those who push VBACs without asking would stop and consider that. I hope that it's coming from a good place when unsolicited advice is offered, but I really think to a large extent it's an ego-based thing going on.

jess7396-you know you can block pms, right?







I've gotten a couple and didn't respond-felt no obligation to do so.


----------



## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

I'm planning on a VBAC, but I'm not a fanatic. Ultimately, my health and the baby's health are the most important.

But I have gotten snarky PMs from people about what I've had to say about my C (from at least 2-3 different people in the last 2 years... I've deleted them all). Apparently, I'm not "sorry enough" about my C, and I'm not "confident enough" about a VBAC. I've definitely been told that my C wasn't necessary--and this before they even knew what happened! Sheesh--V birth at all costs, no matter whether my health or my baby's is compromised...

It really hadn't occurred to me that others would be getting rude PMs, too; now it seems obvious. I realize now that I probably should have just forwarded them to a moderator, or to Cynthia Mosher, or whatever; it's a subtle form of harrassment, and it shouldn't be allowed or tolerated.

This is ultimately why I think we need a "protected space" here.

"So, how do you all take those PMs and how do you respond to them?"

I used to respond and try to explain what happened, why I feel justified, and now I just ignore and delete.


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

I had never seen a post that was derrogitory toward repeat c/b. You would think that in a atmosphere like we are in that there would be more tolerance to such things.

There are things that women do here that I think are silly but I'm not going to spout off at the mouth about it because I don't know all the details.

Was my c/b unnecessary...not at the point where I had it. Was my induction unnecesary...maybe. Was my ob breaking my water...YES!

Anyway, I'm just kinda surprised. I never saw why ladylee was so adamant about needing our own space...but I guess we do!


----------



## Peppermint (Feb 12, 2003)

I was more just curious about why it is assumed that I have not done my own research, soul-search, etc. I just hate even well-meaning people assuming I am uninformed and feeling I need to justify myself about this.

We do need to keep a "safe place" for this to be discussed in a manner that assumes intelligence on the mamas parts about their own situation.

edited


----------



## ladylee (Nov 20, 2001)

It's all good, though-in the face of adversity we're given an opportunity to validate ourselves.


----------



## SMPH (Apr 25, 2003)

But why do we have to validate ourselves??

I don't really want/need an answer to that. Just venting I guess and I haven't even had a c/s yet







:


----------



## Hikaru (Sep 1, 2002)

A big hug to all of you who have had to deal with rude PM's. I
haven't received any myself....maybe I just give off strong "Don't
f___ [email protected]" vibes. I'm just sooooo tired of being judged that I have no patience whatsoever.
I have not posted my birth story (except here where it might do some good, and in the
"October mamas" thread, briefly) and I am not going to.
My response to anyone who wants to know why I've had 2 cesarians is a terse, "Because it was necessary." Unless it's someone who could really benefit from the information, I don't get into the details because it's none of their damn business.

My recovery the second time around has been sooooo easy!
I can't believe Skye is three weeks old already. I am more or less back to normal. It's awesome. I just didn't stress this time (and
didn't torture myself with 34 hours of contractions before agreeing to have a cesarian) and am really doing great both physcally and mentally.
It helps that DD actually sleeps too, unlike her big bro.

Rock on Mamas.


----------



## ladylee (Nov 20, 2001)

True, SMPH-I wasn't implying that we need to validate ourselves *to* anyone, I was referring to an internalized validation. My personal experience was that I did need to do some of that (being the latent uberachiever that I am,) and I know others who have felt the same. And this isn't being said to answer your question, but to be more precise for myself







.

Glad you're feeling well, Hikaru! Rock on, indeed!


----------



## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

This past week, I've heard about the births of two friends of mine. Both C. It got me thinking... I think that in the last year, everyone I know who has given birth (except one woman) has had a C. One or two of them I think may have been suckered into it by their drs (hate to describe it that way, but it's kind of the way I feel), but the rest were really working at having unmedicated V births (including homebirth). Maybe it's just because I've had a C that they're more willing to talk to me about it, or that I'm more aware of what's happening with others. But boy, it just seems from my perspective like *everyone* is having one, and I don't like it.


----------



## ladylee (Nov 20, 2001)

Bumping up the thread.

And just wanted to quickly say how much my second birth is healing me from my first. I'm so grateful!


----------



## SMPH (Apr 25, 2003)

Gotcha ladylee









Quote:

I do energy work, and I surrounded them with loving, protective energy throughout the whole birth. Anyone can do this.
I saw this in the "other" thread and wanted to know if you could elaborate on this.

Thanks,
Shannon


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

I think I've said this before and it might sound stupid but I think my c/b haas served a purpose.

Do you have any idea how many women I have had call me, email me, talk to me about my c/b experience? I get a chance to tell women that even though it isn't what you may want you can make it a great experience









Anyway, these women, with their never ending questions have helped me heal. I can give them an honest looka t what a lot of women are ashamed to talk about. Which is very sad. We should never feel ashamed or have to validate our birthing experience (kwim?)


----------



## SMPH (Apr 25, 2003)

I'm already trying to figure out how I will respond to people who say "aw...you had to have a c-section...". Honestly I'm sure I've thought those same words in the past. It's surgery any way you look at it and who _wants_ anyone to have surgery









I figure my child knows that head up is the best position for him to be in. Hopefully we'll know why.

I have a few questions for you experienced cesarean moms...if ya don't mind!

~~How did you make it personal?

~~How soon after did you BF?

~~How long did you stay in the hospital?

I'm sure there are more but the blood isn't quite making it to my brain at the moment...


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

How did I make it personal?-- I talked and asked questions of my anesthesiologist, ob, the nurses, and my dh. My dh explained and described EVERYTHING that happened. I even talked to my baby. We didn't know sex so dh even got to announce it! They offered to let dh cut the cord but he had no intention of doing it...he was a little nervous! When i came out of the OR my son was in my arms. I transported him everywhere; recovery and our room

How soon after did I BF? My son was bf'ed 45 minutes after birth. He latched on like a champ. He was very alert...I was a little drugged from the morphine though. I can still remember the nursing. (I have very few memories after about 5 hours after the c/b till about 1 day laterI'm not sure what they gave me but it really made me loopy)

How did I stay in the hospital? I was induced at am Friday April 26, Ds was born at 9:48pm, we went home Sunday Afternoon at 2. So, after delivery I was there for 40 hours. They said I was having no problems walking and I was in good spirits and I seemed to be healing quickly so there was no reason to stay unless I wanted to. So, i went home as soon as I had everything settled.


----------



## SMPH (Apr 25, 2003)

Thanks Megan.

I hadn't thought about how he would get from surgery to our room. Another question to add to my list! We asked so many questions last week at our appointment the doc said "I think you guys could do this c-section on you own!". Hey, I need to be informed here.


----------



## ladylee (Nov 20, 2001)

~~How did you make it personal?

I communicated my birth wishes to my doctor, just as I would have with a vaginal birth. I made sure I liked and trusted my doctor (I switched ob/gyns mid pregnancy because I didn't feel as comfortable with my first.) I called the anesthesiologist beforehand and spoke to him, just to make sure I liked him too. I needed to treat these people like they were sacred beings-considering the role they were playing in bringing my baby into the world. That really made it personal.

~~How soon after did you BF?

I was amazed at how quickly this happened. I thought I would have to fight to get my baby back, but she was latching on within twenty minutes after they were done stitching me up.

~~How long did you stay in the hospital?

Two days! I was thrilled! My first I stayed 3 days, and I had the option of staying as long as four this time. But I was feeling good enough to go home after two.

SMPH-good luck to you! About the energy thing-do you ever do visualizations? You can do whatever works for you-visualize the baby surrounded by protective white light, a pink cloud, whatever. You can send out the intention that the universe will keep her/him safe, etc. What I did was to ask the universe to surround Alena with all of the love from her family, both here and gone, and to keep her safe. You can take any birth visualization and modify it accordingly.


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

Quote:

_Originally posted by ladylee_
*I thought I would have to fight to get my baby back, but she was latching on within twenty minutes after they were done stitching me up.
*
I was the same way. I was actualy kinda shocked at how long the whole thing took. from epidural to recovery took an hour but it felt like 10 minutes!

I agree...liking your anesthsiologist is a BIG plus! Mine was great...she calmed all of my fears!


----------



## Raven67 (Apr 20, 2002)

Please check your private email on MDC. I sent you an email because it sounds like we are in the same boat. I am almost 38 weeks with a breech baby, and just scheduled a c-section for Nov. 19th. I was planning a homebirth, but that is not meant to be. There are some conditions that we just can't control, and they are best treated with a c-section. i have gotten a lot out of this thread, too. Thanks to everyone for all the great info. Peace.


----------



## OnTheFence (Feb 15, 2003)

I am so glad to see this thread on the Mothering forums. What I really want to see, is an article in Mothering for those of us who do have to have csection births to make it more comfortable, "natural" and incorporate our attachment parenting beliefs. I had to DIG to get the information I needed to have the wonderful cb that I had with my last child.

BTW, I am not pregnant. lol but read the forums. My first CB was very traumatic, I felt the whole thing, and I thought I was going to die. It was necessary after a failed version. I had a transverse breech baby due to a uterine anomaly.

In my last pregnancy my son was head down but in a funky position. His shoulder was presenting against the cervix and his head was tilted the wrong way. I wasn't planning a VBAC but even if I had, I would have been a repeat. I am glad I "planned" my last birth and it was perfect in my eyes.

Now a lot of my crunchy friends wonder how I can say I had a wonderful great csection experience but I did and I would do it again! Some of the things I did for me to overcome the bad previous experience was meditation and birth affirmations. I had to overcome a lot of fears to go back into the OR but with a skilled, empathetic doctor I did. At times she thought my ideas about the birth were off the beaten path but she understood where I came from and respected my decisions.

I think anyone that knows they are going to have a csection should really investigate pain relief and anestesia (sp) for the surgery and after. I think moms to be need to know what kind of drugs are give preop and post o[ and make decisions accordingly. Most moms don't realize that sedatives are given before, during and after birth, and that some drugs given for nausea often can cause sleepiness and "hangovers" after your baby arrives.

For me I chose to have no pre-op drugs. I had a support person other than my husband. In fact my husband had little role when it came to me. I had my sister function as a doula (she was an ob nurse and childbirth educator) I chose to have an epidrual. I have many reasons for this. One was I had a spinal previously that caused me to be sick, didn't work and went to high into my chest. It did not offer pain relief after surgery. There is a small window with a spinal of pain relief. The epidural I got was great. I was still able to move my legs, I felt no pain but I did feel pushing and tugging the baby out of me. My blood pressure did drop and I was given ephedrine, this cleared up the nausea I had and stabilized my blood pressure. One of the reasons I chose the epidural was so I could have it for the next 12-24 hours for pain relief. It was administered right through my catheter into my back. It was a "walking epidural" and after the birth I could sit up, move around and even sat on the side of the bed with no discomfort. I wanted this type of pain relief vs the PCA pump, shots or demerol pills because I wanted to have a clear head and think clearly. I had this removed 17 hours post op. If I have any more babies, I will chose this method again. I could go into a lot of detail about how I came to chosing the epidural but this post is already getting lengthy!

The other things I did to ensure a great cbirth was that I requested to view my baby being born, see him after birth, and hold him on the table up on my chest. I was able to do all these things. My baby wasn't bathed, no goop in his eyes, though I did op for a vitamin K shot. I asked to see my placentat too! My baby was with me from surgery to recovery. My csection was 30 minutes long. Fifteen minutes after sewing me up I was nursing my baby and chatting on the telephone, pain free.

I also requested certain things in the surgery. I wanted people to talk to me. My last cbirth no one spoke to me and that scared me. This time everyone was talking and laughing. I felt at ease. My arms were not strapped down nor my legs. I also asked to be sewn up with stitches vs staples. This was a great improvement from the previous cbirth!

The only unexpected thing that happened was that while I was open on the table they had trouble dislodging my sons head. They could not manually get him out with their hands. So my doctor asked me what I preferred, forceps or vacuum. I chose vacuum over forceps. There was not even a mark on his head or any other place on his body and it took one try with the vacuum. I also ate immediately after he was born. No starvation! I left the hospital in under 48 hours. I could have left at 24 hours but my doctor was uneasy about letting me go home earlier. That was okay, it was nice to have another night alone with him before going home to a house full!

Kim


----------



## Peppermint (Feb 12, 2003)

Kim

Thank you thank you thank you for your post! I really needed to hear that kind of thing right now, I am still 3 months away from my 3rd c-section, but I really need to know what I *can* control, and what choices I have. I really want to make this a wonderful birth, and hearing what others have done to have wonderful c-births really helps. I have one question for you- what pain meds did you use following the epidural? I have had problems with sleepiness in my babies with darvaset (sp?) in the past, and am thinking of trying ibuprofen this time, or any other suggestions, although the darvaset (sp?) did do wonders for the pain, much more than the morphine even, for me.

Thanks again for your very inspiring post, I really appreciate it!


----------



## SMPH (Apr 25, 2003)

Yes, thank you very much.

We are scheduled for our cesarean this Monday at 1 pm.


----------



## OnTheFence (Feb 15, 2003)

Lets see. After my epidural was removed I took demerol by mouth. I took a low dose to begin with instead of a higher dose to see how it made me and Jack feel. I had a script for 30 pills. I think I took ten the first week at home. Mostly at night or when I first got up in the morning. Other times I took Motrin or Extra Strength Tylenol.

With my last csection I had a fairly easy recovery. I was driving in a week, cooking, doing errands. With three kids its not like I could stop! My dad hired a maid for me for 6 weeks so that was really nice. I also had baby's 17 months apart. I think moving around helped the most. I also believe that being sewn up with stitched made a big difference in my recovery. My adhesions are not like they were (I had the onces from my first csection removed).

O and I also picked the time to have my csection. I think this was also key in having a good outcome FOR ME. I know that many people frown upon planning a csection and waiting until you go into labor is better, but emotionally it was better for me to to set everything up and have some control over the whole thing. If I had another head down baby I would most likely wait the next time for labor to begin but with a breech I wouldn't wait to go into labor (I have reasons for this) and just plan. I think the planning is a very personal thing and no would should be judged for doing a scheduled csection. I did not want to risk having my baby on a holiday, a weekend or at night. I wanted to know who my nurse was going to be (YES I interviewed and requested her!), I wanted to talk to the nursery staff, the anestisiologist (sp)( also requested) before I went to the OR. I had Jack at lunch time on a Friday. I had the same nurses for the entire two day stay and the same baby nurse. Also my pediatrician was able to be at the delivery because it was planned. My sister and husband were able to schedule time off too and I was able to arrange child care for my other children.

Please let me know if you want to know anything else!

Kim


----------



## OnTheFence (Feb 15, 2003)

Monday will be a great day to have a baby!!!









Let me give you some tips before you start your journey! LOL

Have your birth plan and your plan for your baby, if you have specific requests.

Get their early enough to request to speak to anyone you need to talk too.

If you care about how your outside incision is done, I strongly recommend stitched vs staples. It doesnt take them that much more time to do them.

Move around no matter how much it hurts. Take pain relief when needed. Breastfeed as soon as you can, even if you are in the twilight zone.

You will have gas. BAD gas. Just let it go honey. Let it go. Rocking will help get it moving out. This often causes more pain than anything after surgery. Some hospitals have rocking chairs in the rooms or nursery, if yours doesnt have one, request one! Rock in it and it will help move the gas out!

Take a Boppy Pillow with you. It is great for when you have to cough, nurse or have a bowel movement the first time.

Have them show you the baby as soon as he or she is born! Request to video and/or take pictures. This is something I was so glad I had.
My friend had to have an emergency csection and was knocked out. (footling breech with prolapse cord) She hates that she had nothing! When she woke up she didnt even know she had a baby.









Your husband CAN cut the cord. And I dont mean just trim it. Unless there is some type of problem your DH or SO can cut the cord, he just has to promise to keep the sterile field intact.

Don't let them put the cream in your babies eyes. No matter what they say, your baby is coming out a hole in your belly not the vagina so there is no concern about STDs or infections. I still dont get why they do this with csection babies!

If you feel nauseated at all, tell them right away so they can give you something. I recommend Zofran, but unless you ask before hand for this before they may give you phenegran which will make you loopy and sleepy.

If I think of anything else I will try to post before Monday AM. LOL

Kim


----------



## ladylee (Nov 20, 2001)

keeping the thread active

hope it went well smph!


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

Hey gals---

SMPH--I hope all went well!!

You gals gave some great advice. I'm still not sure on how to prepare for my vbac with the possiblity of anohter c/b. I tried to post this question a few months ago and all i got was....I'm vbac-ing and thats all there is to it....so I'm still at a loss.

I like all your suggestions but not sure i need to go as far. My last c/b experience was actually pretty wonderful after hearing what others have gone through and I guess I'm dillusional to think this one if it would be a c/b would be as good with no planning (but it is a different hospital too)

Oh, and I found a doula....she has had one c/b (same day as mine but different year) and 4 vbacs! So, I'm hoping she'l have some great insight!!


----------



## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

iof, I could have written your post (except I'm due in May). I still need to find a doula, though.


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

got an email from my doula. She was hesitant to say anything but I opened the door. She used the mws I'm going with and she left because she felt like they tell you what you want to hear and then do what they want. My dh had said long ago that they were a couple women on a poewr trip.

Now I don't know what to do. I know the one said I wasn't really having contractions it was just stretching about 2 months ago. Which I know was wrong. She said You couldn't have ptl at 20 weeks.

Now I'm at a loss. I'm very very glad I decided to go with a doula too.


----------



## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Oh, big hugs, iof... I had this situation with my midwife during my pg with ds. I don't really have any helpful advice, but I think having a doula will really help you to have someone there who's watching out for *you*.


----------



## SMPH (Apr 25, 2003)

Hey there!

Just popping in to say that we are home and doing well. Aiden Maxwell was born by cesarean on Monday 11/10 at 12:58 pm. He weighed 8lbs 1 0z and was/is 19.25 inches long. He's a little slice of heaven









The c/b went well, I think! I had a spinal, staples and only Motrin after. The nurses were all surprised by that







I did have some terrible nausea right after he was born (still in OR) and then again as soon as we were back in the room. I did have some water in the am (sorry...my throat was so dry!) but I also attribute it to never having anesthetic before. That part did suck but only last a few moments.

I was excited to feel well enough to come home after 48 hours instead of 72.


----------



## Hikaru (Sep 1, 2002)

~~How did you make it personal?

By relaxing and by having my DH and DS right there.
Also by choosing a clinic where I would be guaranteed a private room.

~~How soon after did you BF?
The first time, two hours later.
The second time, about half an hour later, on the operating table!

~~How long did you stay in the hospital?
10 days the first time.
7 days the second time.
In Japan up to two weeks is normal....insurance covers it.

Hugs to all you rockin' c-birth mamas. Sorry I haven't participated lately but it's hard with a five week old and family visiting right now.


----------



## OnTheFence (Feb 15, 2003)

SMPH CONGRATS!!!!! I am glad things went well. For a first time c/b it sounds like things went well. And wow girl if you only needed motrin that is good too. I am glad you were up and out of there and are now at home. Love on that baby, they are a slice of heaven!!!

Sorry about the nausea. I think it could be from being a first timer and that is a side effect from the spinal as it wears off.

Cant wait to hear more about your baby!

Kim


----------



## OnTheFence (Feb 15, 2003)

IOF, I didnt have time to reply earlier due to kids and business but now I have some time.

I wanted to say that I think it is great you have a doula that is eager to work with you. I also wanted to say that I can understand about your midwife situation. I had a OB like that the first time around. She seemed eager to give me the natural birth I desired and even offered me a lot of comfort when things started going sour in the end of my pregnancy, but hidsight I realized she was the one wanting to be the boss and I was just a silent co-pilot along for the ride so to speak.

Even though your plans are for a successful VBAC and I do hope you achieve this! I think you should have an alternate plan for a repeat csection, even if it is unexpected. It is best to discuss these things now, at least with your doula before a situation comes up and you might not be able to voice your wants and desires.

Kim


----------



## Raven67 (Apr 20, 2002)

I am having my first baby tomorrow. She is in a difficult breech position, and refuses all efforts to turn. I was planning a homebirth, but no providers in my area will even attempt a vaginal breech birth with a first time mom. My wonderful midwife will be at the birth and in the recovery room to help me with breastfeeding. I also have doula visits lined up. I went to the hospital today to register, and they seem pretty accomodating. I signed off refusing all the routine stuff: vit k, hep b, eye gunk, bath in the nursery. No one batted an eye. They also said I could keep the baby with me the whole time, although recommend I have support in my room, which I do. I am very excited about tomorrow, I hope I get some sleep tonight! I finally get to meet my daughter!


----------



## Kelly71 (Nov 19, 2001)

Congrats and many blessings to you. I am a hopeful SMC myself and hope to TTC again next cycle. I am excited to hear about your journey into parenthood.

Kelly


----------



## ladylee (Nov 20, 2001)

Raven67-wishing you a beautiful birth experience!

Everyone, I'm bowing out for now. I no longer feel drawn to Motheringdotcom and rather than just disappearing, I'd like to wish everyone well-thanks for sharing so much of yourselves and I'm grateful for the healing I've taken from here.
Blessings to all!


----------



## Peppermint (Feb 12, 2003)

Raven

I also wish you a very beautiful birth experience







Please come tell us all about it when you get the chance.

Ladylee- I am so sad to see you go







I am not sure if you realize what a huge source of support you have been to me and many others, I really wish you could stay, but I understand that you have to do what makes you most comfortable, if you wouldn't mind I would like to keep in touch, pm me if you like, I could use your continued support if you can give it.

I hope this thread continues as the wonderfully supportive place ladylee has made it, support for c-births is not common in certain circles and we need each other.
edited for being bad


----------



## SMPH (Apr 25, 2003)

hoping all goes well for ya!

let us know how thing went.


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

Can I just say how aggrivated I am that there is NO c/b forum! It hadn't bothered me until today. I have all these questions that I know have been asked before on this thread but it is too hard to reread every post. And no one answers c/b questions!!

I am working on my repeat birth plan for a just in case....and that is the problem. I have all kinds of questions. I've posted some on the vbac board and some on the b and beyond. If you see them PLEASE respond!!!


----------



## Peppermint (Feb 12, 2003)

Meagan

Why don't you go ahead and re-post all of your questions to this thread, we will answer them even though they have already been on here before







We are the people to ask you know


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

If you don't mind...I'll post them again!!

1. *What are the benefits of a walking epidural over a regular epidural (if there are any)*

2. *What pain meds to I have option over?*

3. *What things should I include in my birth plan?* (this is for jsut in case)

My last c/b was good. I didn't have any of the horrific things happen that you hear about. So, I'm a little nervous this time around having heard the "bad" things that can happen.

Do you guys think this is silly. I'm going to make signs for my door when i'm at the bc or l&D that say... "Have you read my birth plan?" and one about not using the word pain inmy presence. (I trained the staff last time because I spent 9 months training myself to think of it as stretching!) I'll also make signs for no bath and no eye drops.

Ok, thats it for now. I have more but can't think right now. Thanks a lot!!!


----------



## OnTheFence (Feb 15, 2003)

Quote:

_Originally posted by its_our_family_
*If you don't mind...I'll post them again!!

1. What are the benefits of a walking epidural over a regular epidural (if there are any)

2. What pain meds to I have option over?

3. What things should I include in my birth plan? (this is for jsut in case)

My last c/b was good. I didn't have any of the horrific things happen that you hear about. So, I'm a little nervous this time around having heard the "bad" things that can happen.

Do you guys think this is silly. I'm going to make signs for my door when i'm at the bc or l&D that say... "Have you read my birth plan?" and one about not using the word pain inmy presence. (I trained the staff last time because I spent 9 months training myself to think of it as stretching!) I'll also make signs for no bath and no eye drops.

Ok, thats it for now. I have more but can't think right now. Thanks a lot!!!*
I cant remember, but havent you moved since your last birth? Instead of posting signs everywhere, I would recommend one on one conversations with your nurse, any other attendants and the head nursery nurse either in early labor or if you have a csection. Bring the signs in case you need them but you do not want to alienate the staff.
As for the other stuff, as for pain meds. I chose an epidural which was left in my back and I was given continuous pain relief for hours after the birth. I was able to move around, etc. I answered you in another thread, PM me if you have any more questions.
I chose to have no pre-op drugs. This means no sedatives, no phenegran, no zofran, nothing to relax me. I wanted to be fully aware. During surgery my blood pressure did go low and I was given ephedrine in my IV. I was given this three times total. Twice in the OR, once in recovery. However it did not make me loopy. I did feel hyper and high like I had drank a 2liter of Jolt Cola. I chose ot have no post op drugs because I had a PCAPump that administered medication into the cath in my back. I used it very few times because i really didnt need it. After the epidural cath was removed and I did begin to feel aches and pains, which were minimal, I chose to take demerol by mouth and I also took extra strength tylenol. Demerol was a good choice for me and I was very happy with the results. It didnt make me feel out of mind or overly tired. I did feel more relaxed and I didnt have pain.
Things I had in my birthplan:
I did not want my arms tied down to the table.
I wanted the OB to talk to me during the csection.
I wanted to be talked too and not over.
I did not want my baby bathed or have the cream put in his eyes.
I wanted to hold my baby on my chest after he was examined.
I wanted to see my placenta.
I wanted to be able to see the birth with a mirror and view my baby before being examined.
I wanted to be sewn up with stitches instead of staples.
I wanted the adhesions from the last csection removed.
I did not want forceps used on my baby (they did have to use a vacuum -- and asked first)
I did want the vitamin K shot.
I wanted X number people in the OR with me.
I wanted to be able to video and take pictures. (well my partner...lol)
O, I didnt want my cath put in until after I had my epidural.


----------



## UD_CHICK (Sep 17, 2003)

I am so glad I found this thread! I had an unplanned CB with my daughter and am now trying to decide what to do with my son due at the beginning of March.

Right now I'm leaning towards a repeat Cbirth. My OB said he's leaning towards a CB as well, but if I want to try VBAC it's up to me.

My first CB wasn't traumatic. I had been on bed rest/terbutaline for 8 or 9 weeks for PTL. And, 5 days after I went off the terbutaline, my water ruptured. After laboring for (months) 6 or 7 hours, they started pitocin because they realized my contractions (though they looked big) weren't effective. After another 7 hours I had only progress to 4 cm (turns out, Isobel's head wasn't square on my cervix - she was slightly turned - she came out with a big lump on the side of her head!). It was at that point we decided to do the CB.

All-in-all it was a fabulous experience. I had a lot of fun talking with the doctor and the staff in the operating room - it was really neat. My daughter was 5 wks early, so she had suck/breathe/swallow reflex problems and had to go to the NICU. I insisted on tyring to latch on in the recovery but I was so doped up I couldn't barely hold my head up. AFter a week in the NICU, she came home and we haven't looked back since.

I have two friends that are nurse anesthetists who want me to make my own decision about my birth method, but are not real fans of VBAC because of the risks ("once you've seen one uterine rupture, you woudn't ever want to risk one"). (They work at a hospital that delivers 30,000 babies a year. ) I was at the L&D ER last week for some breathing problems (turns out it was the baby's position and hyperventilating) and when I surveyed the nurses there, they were of the same opinion.

I can't (and don't) want to use a midwife because of my high-risk history. My priority is the healthy delivery of my son.

Repeat CB Questions:
1. Are there pain meds that the doctors can administer that won't make me as dopey as the demerol did in the recovery room?

As I recall, something- maybe the epi started to wear off during surgery, so as soon as they had delivered Isobel, they gave me a good dose of Demerol.

2. Why get a spinal instead of an epidural?

I got the epi when they started the pitocin. Because my membrane had ruptured, they wouldn't let me walk around - so I could lay on my left side, my right or my back. And it was getting difficult to manage the pain through breathing. I panicked at the thought of the pitocin pain.

3. What is recovery like for a planned CB?

I've been told that the recovery for a planned CB is often much better than an unplanned - because by the time you have an unplanned CB, you are completely taxed and often very sick. My recovery was lengenthed by my time on bed rest - so it took me a good 6 months to physically feel pretty good and emotionally be balanced (slight ppd/new parent/life transition anxiety as well). But perhaps that was really recovery from the pregnancy rather than the surgery.

Ok, I'd better stop typing - this message is already too long. I'm just so glad to find some women who are facing the same decisions that I am - and who also find it difficult to define the birth experience in black and white terms.


----------



## Peppermint (Feb 12, 2003)

Hi!









I have had both a scheduled and a somewhat surprise cb, the scheduled was first, and I found the recovery worse then, I imagine it had to do with the fact that I wasn't in great shape prior to the birth, had been on modified bedrest, and had gained too much weight IMO. I think the shape you are in makes a big difference, although I am sure it is much worse recovery if, as you say, you have it at the end of a traumatic labor.

I have had spinals both times and have been pretty pleased with the results, my main issue was the thought that I might feel the surgery, and that never happened (although I think that would be highly unlikely in any planned c-birth, as they have the time to make sure you are all numb before they start, where in an emergency they don't have that time the same way.

I had morphine after my births and was not happy with it. I also had demorol, and was very happy with the pain relief provided, but felt it made my nursing babies too sleepy (wasn't too bad on me, a little doopey- but not bad), so I am looking for alternatives for pain this time, maybe just ibuprofen once my milk comes in?

I understand your struggle about wether or not to have a repeat of VBAC. I decided when pregnant with my son, that I wanted to VBAC, but I had conditions- there would be NO use of labor inducing drugs, I would labor in the hospital the whole time, and I wanted my OB there the whole time I was (she was great and agreed to all of it), well, turned out I need to have c-births due to a malformed pelvis anyway, but that was my plan anyway. I talked to my current OB about her feelings on VBAC (For a woman like me who has had 2 c-births already-even though I am not a candidate anyway) and she said similar to what you have been told, "you are a healthy mom, with a healthy baby, and I have seen uterine rupture and it is so sad to see such tragedy in an otherwise healthy mom and baby". Of course, she knows that for me there is no way the baby is coming out vaginally and we were really talking about how far she would like to see me labor prior to doing the c-section. ( I intend to go into labor before the birth, like I did with my son, cause I like knowing the baby is totally ready, YK?)

I would definitely suggest you read as much as you can about both VBAC and repeats, there are a lot of women on this board who have been very successful with VBAC, and it is always good to listen to both sides (Although I would suggest posting what you have here on any other part of the board, unless you want to be severely judged







: ), but, it is good to read other's experiences and in the end you will do what is best for you and baby, and you will get all kind of support on this thread.

Well, that's all the answers I have for you, I am sure others have much more to add!


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

So, last week after meeting with my mw we have decided we will labor as long as possible at home. She was unable to give me any answers to my questions because "nothing can be definite". We also realized why they have such a high success rate. They have a million reasons to kick you to L&D. If you have PIH, if you gain too much or not enough weight, blah blah blah.... My doula works for homebirth mw. She said I should go that route...no thanks....but if I have the baby at home then thats that but I do not want to labor for hours with those mw!


----------



## OnTheFence (Feb 15, 2003)

> _Originally posted by UD_CHICK_
> Repeat CB Questions:
> 1. Are there pain meds that the doctors can administer that won't make me as dopey as the demerol did in the recovery room?
> 
> ...


----------



## Megs Mom (Mar 19, 2002)

I am just so happy to find you all here! I read all the posts on this thread to catch up. I'm trying to do my homework on a c/b b/c Patrick is footling so it may be necessary to do a planned one. I really appreciated all the suggestions on things to think about ahead of time.

I'm especially relieved to read that you can have the babies and nurse them right away. I had pretty much thought that was out, but didn't really see why.

Thanks, everyone!


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

I'm glad you found us!

There is a lot to learn about options. I'm jsut now starting to sift through it all too! I'm starting my birth plan for a just in case type thing.


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

Ok, this is the plan... bombard the B and B forum with so many c/b questions they HAVE to give a subforum!

Have you noticed how many questions there are??? One answer I'm kinda t'ed off about but I'll get over it!


----------



## Terion (Nov 28, 2003)

anyone here have 2 or more c-sec and then have a vbac or know of anyone who has?


----------



## UD_CHICK (Sep 17, 2003)

for those of us who are having repeat c/bs soon (or has had one recently) - is anyone planning to wait for labor to start before they go into the operating room? (or, did you do this)

I.e., did you wait for your baby to tell you s/he was ready to come out before you went in for your repeat c/b, or did you just schedule it around week 39 (or whatever your doctor's policy is)?

I'm wondering about the merits of waiting for the baby to tell you that it's ready to come out before you go into surgery, versus scheduling a date when the baby may or may not be completely ready to come out.

Any input would be appreciated!

Thanks!


----------



## Peppermint (Feb 12, 2003)

UD Chick

I am planning on going into labor first, but am doubting my plan big time. I feel there are great benefits to knowing that your baby is ready to come out. I had a scheduled 38 week section the first time around, and my dd didn't nurse well, the second time I was in labor when I had the section at 39 weeks, and my son nursed beautifully, and it just seemed great that he was ready to be out









However, there are downsides- I won't be able to plan on having my own Dr. do the section, and could very well get one particular partner who I strongly dislike and do not trust (And I'm anxious about this anyway), the other possilbe Dr.s I have never even met







Also, I may not be able to get my birth plan followed as well, it would be more of a rush job, IYKWIM. The problem with me is that I was in labor the last time without knowing it, and that makes my OB nervous, she had agreed to just monitor me closely, and do the section at the first signs of early labor. My main issue is that I really think the birth will be best for the baby if I am as comfortable with it as possible, which would be ok for a more easy going mama









It is a tough call, and in the end I will have to go with gut and converse lots with my OB in those last few weeks.
Also- if the baby is in a breech position, I will schedule it for 39 weeks, as I know the risks would be magnified if the baby is breech (for my situation).

Best of luck with that decision.


----------



## OnTheFence (Feb 15, 2003)

Quote:

_Originally posted by UD_CHICK_
*for those of us who are having repeat c/bs soon (or has had one recently) - is anyone planning to wait for labor to start before they go into the operating room? (or, did you do this)

I.e., did you wait for your baby to tell you s/he was ready to come out before you went in for your repeat c/b, or did you just schedule it around week 39 (or whatever your doctor's policy is)?

I'm wondering about the merits of waiting for the baby to tell you that it's ready to come out before you go into surgery, versus scheduling a date when the baby may or may not be completely ready to come out.

Any input would be appreciated!

Thanks!*
My first csection was an emergency after an unsuccessful ECV. My second was planned 12 days before my due date. Fro me it was important to plan and have verything just so to have my birthplan followed. I was not to bargain with surprises or end up without my doctor, nurse or the anest. that was present at my csection.

But its possible I will be having to face these decisions again







and what I can tell you is that it will depend. If I have a breech presentation, it will be planned. I am not going to wait for labor because its risky. (IMO) I think this is very personal decision. Of course when labor begins you know that was the day your baby was to be born -- but if you have to have a csection your emotional state and mentally you may need to have things more planned. I think you have to weigh all aspects of it.


----------



## Megs Mom (Mar 19, 2002)

I think I am changing my mind from waiting for labor to start, to scheduling instead. I'll talk to my OB, I really trust her, but this whole footling/cord prolapse thing has me much more concerned than babies being a few days early (NEVER thought I'd say this).


----------



## UD_CHICK (Sep 17, 2003)

Yes, as many of you point out, these questions are pretty much academic until we are presented with making them.

I'm just hoping to make it past 35 weeks this time! Then we'll see whether we can try VBAC or stick wtih the planned C.

I do appreciate the points about having your own doctors. That is definately important to me.

Well, I'll continue doing research and we'll see what the next 13 weeks bring! This was about the time in the last pregnancy that I started indicating PTL. So far I haven't felt but the occasional BH.

Deb


----------



## copslass (Apr 19, 2003)

Terion,

Just checking in, haven't read all of the posts, but I saw your question about vba2c.

My sections were 19 and 18 years ago, vbacs 14, almost 13 years ago and another vbac 10 months ago.

I'll have to read through the posts tomorrow to see what you've written.

Feel free to pm me.


----------



## Megs Mom (Mar 19, 2002)

Cross-posted, need input.

Sleeping terribly, can't get comfortable for anything, in the bathroom every hour at least. I think nighttime sleep cycles are supposed to be longer than an hour, which means I'm never getting into that deep restorative sleep and I feel it. Tonight is esp. bad - I would not normally give up and get out of bed - but I'm feeling this weird, intense pressure on my cervix and trying to decide what to do about it. Should probably call my OB but wondering if it can wait until my DH wakes up in a couple of hours. Had a few more BH than normal yesterday, but nothing intense or regular at all. Tons of baby movement but I don't know if that's a good sign or a bad sign given the circumstances. Lower back very sore, bad sign. I'm 32w1d now. Too early to have these babies, for sure.

Appreciate those who have read these musings, it's helping me decide that I probably need to wake DH up. Damn.


----------



## Peppermint (Feb 12, 2003)

Megs Mom

How are you doing this morning? Praying for you.


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

Analisa--I hope everything is going ok. I've been out so I didn't see any of the posting till lately.

Just an update on me.... I'm going to switch from my mw to an ob. Dh and I have been talking about it. It is not worth using the birthing center to have to deal with those "women on a power trip". I'll explain moer later!


----------



## Megs Mom (Mar 19, 2002)

Quote:

_Originally posted by jess7396_
*Megs Mom

How are you doing this morning? Praying for you.*
Thanks for asking, everyone, here's my update, typed elsewhere and copied here:

Woke up yesterday morning at 4 am, basically in labor. Called the OB, woke Eric up at 5 to take me to the hospital. After a bunch of heartbeat monitoring (they can NEVER find both babies at once, this always takes forever), I was given two injections 20 minutes apart of Terbutaline to stop the contractions. This made my heart race so they did not do the called-for third injection. I was in a significant amount of pain, mostly in my back, so they also gave me Lortab, which seemed to stop the contractions more effectively than the Terb. I threw up twice, got 1-1/2 bags of IV fluids, some Phenergan for nausea, and some lunch (thanks, I've had enough turkey and stuffing lately). Seven hours later we were sent home with nothing for pain b/c doc doesn't want it to mask any contraction changes. I was contracting agian regularly after the Lortab wore off. I dozed the rest of the afternoon while Eric worked a half day. Woke up for dinner and to watch some TV and went back to sleep - slept very badly and woke up in the middle of the night with a severe migraine. Seem to have now gotten rid of that with Fioricet, got up to eat breakfast but have to spend most of my time in bed now. Oh, and the beginnings of a urinary tract infection which COULD explain why this happened, so on antibiotics for that. And a fetal fibronectin test indicated a less than 1% chance I'll go into "real" labor in the next two weeks. (This was just practice labor as it wasn't dilating my cervix, although I am 40% effaced). Ultrasound showed Patrick is still footling and Catherine is still transverse, although she did a 180 degree turn so her feet are against his head, rather than her head butting his. Back to bed for me now.


----------



## Megs Mom (Mar 19, 2002)

Quote:

_Originally posted by its_our_family_
*Analisa--I hope everything is going ok. I've been out so I didn't see any of the posting till lately.

Just an update on me.... I'm going to switch from my mw to an ob. Dh and I have been talking about it. It is not worth using the birthing center to have to deal with those "women on a power trip". I'll explain moer later!*
I was very happy with my switch from MW to OB but certainly it's going to depend upon your specific situation. Good luck!


----------



## SMPH (Apr 25, 2003)

Meg's Mom~~Glad to hear everything is "OK". I know it's not perfect but I'm happy the babies are staying put for a while longer


----------



## OnTheFence (Feb 15, 2003)

Quote:

_Originally posted by its_our_family_
*Analisa--I hope everything is going ok. I've been out so I didn't see any of the posting till lately.

Just an update on me.... I'm going to switch from my mw to an ob. Dh and I have been talking about it. It is not worth using the birthing center to have to deal with those "women on a power trip". I'll explain moer later!*
What happened? I had several posts you have written about them and wondered about these folks myself!

Kim


----------



## OnTheFence (Feb 15, 2003)

Analisa, Hang in there. Keep them babies baking, Sounds like your babies have some interesting positions in there.


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

Megs mom--Can I copy/paste your update to the Jan/Feb thread?

I'm feeling good about my decision to switch. I don't like they will not give a good answer for anything. I still don't have time to texplain but I think my first indication was that it is impossible to have contractions at 20 weeks.....

I'm out of town but I'm going to contact my doulas OB who she raves about! I'm 32-ish weeks so I have plenty of time! (I hope...)


----------



## ~Megan~ (Nov 7, 2002)

I probably won't have a c-section next time but wanted to drop in here anyway and say 'hi'. dd was a planned c-section who became a non-scheduled c-section. She came 15 days before her scheduled date. She was breech.
I think I really want to do a VBAC this time. I want to experience labor and at least give it a chance since I didn't before.

I can understand how one would be scared of the risks of a VBAC. My friend is pregnant with her second and is leaning toward a scheduled section. She pushed for hours with her son and doesn't want to go through that again.


----------



## CajunMama (Jun 24, 2003)

I am scheduled for a section tomorrow. Reading these posts has been soooooo comforting to me. I thank all the mamas who have come forward.

I had an emergency section in '99. I was at 32 weeks, my water broke, and the placenta had started to tear away from my uterus. Before they realized that, as I was pushing the baby out, her heatbeat would stop, so hense the emergency section. She was a healthy 5 llbs. I gave her up for adoption ( LONg story- and quite painful). The entire experience was terrifying and I really don't remember the particulars.

I am 39w with my second child, and I was planning on a VBAC. I am a different person than I was in '99- I am in infinitely better shape physically and emotionally.I have a loving partner that is with me all the way.







: I strove for the entire pregnancy to have a vaginal birth because I felt that this was my chance to finally "do things right".

When I made the decision yesterday to have a repeat section, I was devistated. After meeting with my OB and my husband, and going over the facts relating to my pregnancy ( 9-10lb estimate, not dropping at all, no dialation or thinning- possible CPD, and my blood pressure has been rising to high levels), we made the decision to have a section. Reading your posts has helped me tremendously. I really needed to hear about "ceasarian births" and not feel like I had failed to give my baby the best possible birth experience.








Thank you mamas! I had been afraid to post at B&B, but finding this thread was a lifesaver.

Thanks for listening.


----------



## Peppermint (Feb 12, 2003)

Hoping for a wonderful birth experience for you tomorrow CajunMama!









I wanted to share with you all, since I cannot share it anywhere else on here







I have finally come to the decision to plan my c-section (6 weeks and 3 days from now). I had intended to go into labor, as I felt that was best for the baby (healthiest), then I started not being able to sleep at night, worrying about who would end up performing the c-section, my OB is only on one out of every 5 nights, so I could end up with someone I do not know at all. Her new partner is for lack of a better term - a complete moron- but I won't go into details on that, just trust me- MORON! And I thought I might just break down if I showed up in labor and found the new gal there









So, I talked it over with my OB, and she said, "OK, I've been behind you all the way with going into labor first, but now, I think it is time for you to schedule this delivery with me." She got out the calendar, and we planned it, I will be 39 weeks, and I am finally sleeping at night again. I know this is best for me and baby. I feel so relieved.

It is funny, b/c I really wanted to labor first, but now, I know how much better I will feel, having my OB there, having time for the anesthesia to take effect properly, knowing my children are with my parents and happy, etc. Such a huge load off of my mind.

Of course, all that said, I am still secretly dreaming that I will end up having a super fast labor where I deliver the baby at home, into the hands of my wonderful paramedic husband, but, that is just a dream


----------



## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

Wow, Patty, that's great. I really hear where you're coming from.

I'm only ~19 wks, and I'd really like a VBAC. Part of me really feels like another C is going to happen (and no, I don't think it's me worrying or just being pessimistic... lot of it has to do with other problems I've had during this pg). I'm doing all I can to prepare for the VBAC, but yeah, you'd better be sure that I'm going to be ready for a C, too. I can totally understand how nice it would be to have your back-up all scheduled and ready (am I right in understanding that if you go into labor before the C, you'll go with the VBAC?).

Anyway, congrats.

And Cajunmama, when you're ready to tell us about your birth, come back and let us know how it went!


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

I'm 32+ weeks and I just can't shake the feeling this baby will be breech and I'll have another c/b! I really want a vbac but baby who has been head down for 4+ weeks is now transverse and I'm afraid he will flip breech!

My chiro is very skilled with webster technique so I'm confident he could help...but I still have the fear...


----------



## Hikaru (Sep 1, 2002)

Hey, is anyone else hurt and upset by the editorial in the most recent issue of Mothering? I live in Japan so it took awhile to get to me, just arrived yesterday.
I was devasted. I am an intelligent woman. I bloody well tried to have a vaginal birth. 34 hours of contractions with no drugs the first time!!
And I insisted on waiting for labor to start naturally the second time, even though the doctor offered to do an elective cesarian I
refused.
I set up all the best conditions for both of my babies. And I ended up having two cesarians .I am so angry now maybe I'd better wait a few more days before writing to the magazine.


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

I haven't read the article but it sounds bleck! I agree that you should wait to calm down a bit first.


----------



## Peppermint (Feb 12, 2003)

Quote:

_Originally posted by KKmama_
*am I right in understanding that if you go into labor before the C, you'll go with the VBAC?*
Actually, I am not a VBAC candidate, I will be having a c-section either way- I just had thought it would be best to go into labor first (before having the section) so that I would know the baby was ready to come out, KWIM?

Edited b/c I violated the user agreement, not b/c I don't believe in what I wrote


----------



## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

_edited out by missgrl_


----------



## Kari_mom (Jun 1, 2003)

Obviously, this post was seen as inappropriate. My apologies to anyone I offended. I did not realize that we were not allowed to post personal opinions about statements made off the boards. My passion about defending mothers, including myself, who need cesarean for a safe birth remains.

Karen


----------



## Hikaru (Sep 1, 2002)

I am editing my posts too. I was upset and am waiting to see what kind of response will come in the next issue of the magazine.


----------



## ladylee (Nov 20, 2001)

_*edited out by Missgrl. Ladylee, you have your PM turned off and left no access to email communication. Send me a PM if you have any questions.*_


----------



## Hikaru (Sep 1, 2002)

Ladylee, I was tempted to cancel my subscription too. but I love the magazine on just about every other issue and I think it's important for cesarian Moms to stay and make ourselves heard.

I originally included a copy of the letter I sent to the magazine but have edited it out as it might violate the user agreement.
I'll wait to see if they choose to print it.


----------



## Kari_mom (Jun 1, 2003)

Edited to avoid offending anyone.


----------



## OnTheFence (Feb 15, 2003)

Post edited out to suit the powers that be. If you would like to read it, PM me.

Kim


----------



## Peppermint (Feb 12, 2003)

Quote:

_Originally posted by OnTheFence_
*
Jess7396 -- It is so hard making these decisions!I know you did the right thing for you and your baby. I know that once my last cb was planned I was so at ease. Things went so smoothly and I felt so at peace. I hope this happens for you as well with your upcoming birth.
______________________________
The thing is, it just wasnt going to happen for me and its not going to happen for many of us and it has nothing to do with me being an American woman who doesnt believe in this -- this is an educated, American woman whose body cant birth vaginally and thank the gods that I live in a place where I can see a skilled physician to provide me with a csection to even have babies.

__________________________
PS Ladylee I was happy to see you drop in!







*
________________________________
ITA with the last 2 parts I quoted here, and thanks for the support for my scheduled delivery, I do feel so much better about all of it now, and I can sleep at night.

I wanted to expand on what you said about being glad to live in a place where you can have babies, I feel the same. I have said this before- God (nature, whatever you happen to believe in) does clearly not make everyone "perfect". If people can be born blind, crippled, etc. why is it so hard to believe that some women can be born and grow in such a way that they cannot birth their babies vaginally- or some babies could develop in such a way that a vaginal birth is not safest for them (spina bifida comes to mind)? Why do people think that it is just not possible? I do understand that way more women are "diagnosed" with these problems that those who actually have them, but.. some women do. If I were born in a different time or place, I would not likely be here today, and my babies most certainly would not be here. I have always kind of felt that there would be certain people out there who would think that I was clearly never meant to be a mother (by birth) since my pelvis is not made for vaginal birth. I disagree (of course), I think God put me in this time and place, and with skilled Dr.s, who could help me to have babies, and save all of our lives.

I wonder when people are so judgemental about c-births, how would they feel someday if their own daughter's life were in danger (severe pre-eclampsia comes to mind) or their grandchild could die w/o a c-birth (prolapse cord comes to mind), what would they think of c-birth then? And, why, oh why, can't they afford other women what they would afford their own daughters? My mother is very pro-natural birth, absolutely (although I don't think that ever made her extremely judgemental of other women







: ), but when the OB said my dd was breech with a shoulder presentation, and that we could try to turn her, my mom's medical background and all said, "yes, that would be best", but her instincts (and mine) said, "I don't think we should". My dd's cord was wrapped tightly around her neck twice, and while many would find that no big deal, and would assume my OB a liar, my OB did the surgery and said that had she turned her, it would've been an emergency c-section- no doubt about it. My mom was so glad that she and I trusted our instincts (dh didn't have a clue poor thing, he was just scared







)

I am all for people having strong opinions (I have quite a few myself), but I think that the people who are able to temper their opinions with common sense, and compassion are much more effective, and are able to get through to people so much better, and truly make a difference in the world









edited b/c I was naughty again.


----------



## KKmama (Dec 6, 2001)

_edited out by missgrl_


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

i think that some are really defensive over this topic for a couple reasons.

1. Women have spent sop long trying to get drs and such to listen to them that they feel having a cb is a threat to that. Which in some ways makes sense.

2. They have read too many books. Honestly how many books are there out there that say "You won't make a baby you can't birth" "c/b is the WORST thing you can do and 9 out of 10 times is unecessary and uneducation is what causes them."

I mean really. Sometimes is it a choice thing and sometimes not. Who was it that said if you hear/say something enough times no matter how absurd it becomes truth??

I have the CHOICE to vbac or not. I have chosen to do so. But my friend who has read the same info I have said no and is scheduling her c/b. We both know the same stats but we made different choices







can that really happen!!

By request I have edited my posts but I still stand by what I said...sorry I forgot about the user agreement


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

Quote:

_Originally posted by KKmama_
*I don't recall... when was the last time we were refused to have a cesarean subforum? (Were we actually given an answer by someone "up there"?) Is it time to ask again?
*
Someone asked about a forum 2 weeks ago "it is being discussed" This was brought up by a brand new member who said that she saw forums for everything else but not what she needed most.

I don't visit the vbac forum. I ASKED ABOUT WHY YOU CHOSE VBAC AND THEY ALL SAID "BECAUSE" UMMM, YEAH, GREAT ANSWER! So, i haven't found much helpful there even in the search stuff. (sorry about the caps!)


----------



## cynthia mosher (Aug 20, 1999)

I have split this thread to form a new thread - Cesarean support circle V (December 12). So if you find your posts missing from this thread you can go to the new thread and continue your discussion there.

My reason for splitting the thread was to address some things said and the issue of a cesarean forum. It seemed best to do so at the appropriate point in the thread's discussion to avoid confusion.

I just today visited this thread to announce the plan to have a subforum for Cesarean birth and found this discussion about the editorial and the other thoughts raised and feelings about Mothering expressed.

When the request was first made for a cesarean board I did feel that it was not a subject of necessity and perhaps not one that Mothering need make special space for. We have made decisions like that for several other board requests and my decision was, at that point, that cesarean discussion can and should be hosted comfortably in existing boards and as part of that aim we reorganized the Pregnancy categories to place Birth and Beyond which is a more general title for hosting birth in general as opposed to the previous "I'm Pregnant" board. You can read my post about that here.

Our criteria in deciding on boards is usually pretty straightforward - start a thread of focus on the topic and let us observe the level of participation and the focus of the discussion. If, after a period of time (which is months, not days or weeks) the thread demonstrates a clear need for a board we will then consider a subforum or forum. Yet some are not so easy to decide on and that is when I bring Peggy into the decision process.

Following through with our criteria, and seeing the activity in the thread and subjects discussed I took the question to Peggy in November. Her response was to continue with our criteria - observe the discussion over a period of time so we can get a feel for the need and the focus of the discussion. Sometimes a focus thread is shown to be sufficient; sometimes a separate board becomes obvious. Sometimes neither.

So I let the issue rest as your discussions continued. In early December I reviewed the cesarean support discussion thread again and presented Peggy with excerpts of the thread so she could have a good idea of the discussion. She was impressed and concerned and decided that a forum would be a good idea to meet the needs of our cesarean birthing mamas. I have asked her for a board description so that the purpose of the board can be clear from the start. She has asked me to find a moderator who can appreciate the many concerns that exist and who can be not only supportive and helpful to mamas who have had or are facing necessary cesareans but also someone who knows the politics and who can address incorrect or incomplete information and help members make the best decision for their own situations.

That is a tall order for a moderator and something I have set aside for the moment as we sort through a few other board needs and prepare for our coming upgrade . I am also awaiting Peggy's board description which I will need in hand to discuss with anyone interested in moderating the board. So that is where we stand with this at the moment.









Having read Peggy's editorial and your posts I can appreciate your hurt feelings. But I would like to ask those of you who wrote about the behavior of members in PM and other references to member behavior on the boards in threads, derogatory remarks about Peggy and Mothering and calling for a boycott or cancelling of Mothering subscriptions to please edit your posts. The issue can be discussed and passionately so but let's please not resort to violations of the user agreement to do so.

I'm sure Peggy will receive plenty of mail about her editorial and will likely publish some of the letters. Also, we are discussing opening an area on the boards for member to post their letters so you will have another avenue to voice your feelings and opinions in response to the mag content, including editorials.

Peace and blessings,
~Cynthia


----------



## MamaOui (Aug 9, 2002)

Deleted because my post was meant to be a PM


----------



## its_our_family (Sep 8, 2002)

Cynthia--I'm not sure what to say. I'm very excited that we were finally heard. I think it a sneaky way to do it too...but I like it. That way you get an honest viewing of how many issues we do have to discuss. Anyway, I'm glad the decision has been made...I have so many questions!!

Ok, now a post for myself...hope it doesn't get lost in the shuffle.

We will have a tentative c/b date of 2/8/04 (I still have to schedule it). Dh have discussed it and if our baby has not made an appearance by 41 weeks I will have a repeat. I talked to the ob and she said that they love vbac moms. However, she wanted me to be aware that if I am visibly in labor for more than 8 hours and I have stalled out in pregression that they will siggest a repeat. Dh and I discussed it and we believe that if my body stalls out we will agree to a repeat but it will probably be in less than 8 hours.

They prefer repeat moms to not have a trial of labor but they will allow me to.

We are much happier here because at any point in labor or before I can change my mind and jsut have the repeat. I did not have this option at the birthing cener or with the midwives. Well, I did but then my care would be immediately turned over to an ob, whom I have never met.

So, we are much much happier where we are!!


----------



## Missgrl (Nov 18, 2001)

I'm too soooo happy that a C/S forum has been granted. I would like to
thank you for being patient in your wait. There have been several threads asking about a c/s subforum and I have done my best in asking to just wait and see what progresses with Peggy's decision.

I must say that I am disappointed in some of the recent posts made here.
This thread was supposed to be a c/s support thread; not what it turned out to be. Though you were not aware of Peggy's pending decision, you were aware that it was still being considered (via other threads). In the future, _please_ ask and discuss such personal issues through the PM system. This forum is owned by Mothering magazine and deserves the respect it gives it's members and subscribers.

Cynthia has asked for some editing. Many User Agreements and Policies have been violated. These were the policies you agreed to follow when you signed on with MDC:
___________________________________
1- Posting in a disrespectful, defamatory, adversarial, baiting, harassing, offensive, insultingly sarcastic or otherwise improper manner, toward a member or other individual, including casting of suspicion upon a person, invasion of privacy, humiliation, demeaning criticism, namecalling, personal attack, or in any way which violates the law.

6- Posting to debate or criticize the MDC User Agreement, the moderators, administrators, or their actions. Constructive criticism and questions for purposes of clarification may be sent through the Private Message feature or by email to the moderator or administrator.

7- Posting to discuss the behavior of a member or members on the board, or to criticize another discussion on the boards. Such issues should be directed to the moderator or administrator privately and not made a subject of discussion in a thread.
______________________________________
Please edit in a respectful manner if a post of yours is in violation. I will PM you in a few days just in case some don't come back to this thread.






























Now, on to a happy note!!!!







Let's all be excited for a c/s forum.
A safe place for us to discuss and support each other and the future moms of c/birth babies!!!


----------

