# 'to train up a child'. yeah, the pearls...



## aja-belly (Oct 7, 2004)

i just found out my midwife and her birthing center are sharing the pearl's newsletter and recommending it and their book 'to train up a child' to new parents. what would you do??

i am so saddened. i worry i won't be able to adress this with my midwife without sounding too rude. of course, it's not an option to just keep quiet. i am trying to compose an e-mail. i need good links or articles to share with her. i thought i may see if anyone here knows of a more gd pamplet or handout i could print up to leave in their office for new parents.

i feel sick just thinking about it.


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## pianojazzgirl (Apr 6, 2006)

Wow, I don't know what to say.


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## rmzbm (Jul 8, 2005)

Oh, wow - tough spot. All I can say is you are absolutly right to speak up - do keep us updated as to how it goes! Good luck!


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## lerlerler (Mar 31, 2004)

Honestly?

"Let me know when you stop recommending the Pearl's book, I would LOVE to come back to your practice, but in good conscience, I can't stay here at this point"


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## guestmama9911 (May 24, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lerlerler* 
Honestly?

"Let me know when you stop recommending the Pearl's book, I would LOVE to come back to your practice, but in good conscience, I can't stay here at this point"

Agreed.


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## pinkmilk (Nov 27, 2005)

Someone please? enlighten me. Pearls?

thanks.


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## Finch (Mar 4, 2005)

WHAT??!! A _midwife_ practice is recommending them??!!??







: Holy crap.

Pinkmilk, here's a link, warning...it's pretty horrible (child beating discussed/taught):

http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/index.php?id=35

Their book is called To Train Up a Child, where they advocate beating _seven month old babies_. uke


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## sappylady (Aug 8, 2005)

I dumped a HBMW for this with my last pregnancy. I told her that I could not in good conscience use a midwife that would endorse the pearls.


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## moonpie's_mama (Oct 31, 2005)

"But the 7-month-old is already learning the dark art of self-will, and must be wisely, gently, and firmly constrained to yield to authority." -_nogreaterjoy.org_










OH MY GOD. i would say just what lerlerler and alisaterry said. sorry, this is my first exposure to the pearls, and i am... completely horrified and blown away. i feel like throwing up.


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## angelpie545 (Feb 23, 2005)

I read that book online for the sake of curiosity-and even myself, a Christian, was absolutely appalled! I know parents who spank and even they would consider that book to be advocating child abuse. The Pearls have a very scary and almost sinister approach to marriage and child rearing. That is NOT what the Bible talks about when it says "Train up a child the way he should go, and when he is older, he will not depart from it". All that verse means is that you should bring a child up to be a decent human being-it DOES NOT mean beat your child with a plastic pipe, or physically punish a baby.


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## Joannarachel (Dec 10, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lerlerler* 
Honestly?

"Let me know when you stop recommending the Pearl's book, I would LOVE to come back to your practice, but in good conscience, I can't stay here at this point"









:

It'll be a cold day in hell before my money goes to support that







.


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## aishy (Dec 13, 2001)

Are you serious? How did you find this out? IM Me later, if you are on whenever you get the kids down or whatever.

ais


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## MomInCalifornia (Jul 17, 2003)

I would also choose to find a new care provider, and I would tell her why.


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## Mom2baldie (Oct 29, 2002)

*


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## Plummeting (Dec 2, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *lerlerler* 
Honestly?

"Let me know when you stop recommending the Pearl's book, I would LOVE to come back to your practice, but in good conscience, I can't stay here at this point"


Absolutely. I would never give my money to someone who supported child abuse.


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## sparkprincess (Sep 10, 2004)

I purchased 2 copies of this book at a thrift store and read through them. Horrifying. Really. Even my mom was horrified and she's pro spanking!!

Is your midwife religious? If so, I can post some links that have to do with the "rod" verses. That may help!


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## The4OfUs (May 23, 2005)

Personally, I would try to have a conversation and find out who in the practice decided that this was appropriate information, and see if you couldn't bring some anti-pearl/anti "training" literature with you...you'd have to be ready for that conversation, though.....hmmm.....

Maybe something like, "I enjoy this practice so much, but am really concerned that the practice is recommending such a punitive parenting method; how long have you been recommending this? Was it decided by one person or as a group? I have some information on why the kind of parenting the Pearl's recommend is seriously detrimental to children, and would like to share it with you. As it stands, I won't be able to remain with the practice if it continues giving out this parenting advice, but would love to invite a dialogue with your group as to why this advice is harmful to both parents and children."

That's jsut off the top of my head, obviously, but maybe something with that kind of tone? Find out whose idea it was to start this nonsense, and back it up with some good info (likely available with the sticky threads at the top of this board, and I'm sure we all could pull some good stuff together for you too), and try to see if they'd be open to hearing why this is a horrendous idea to be spreading......IF they seem open to it, great. IF not, I'd leave and let them know why, maybe in a letter/package with the anti-pearl info in it, and maybe even copy to any governing board there might be in your state? I cna't imagine that any licensing board would be OK with a group practice handing out this kind of information, even the AAP has a no spanking policy.

I'm not usually a person for confrontation, but this would be one thing I'd go after...thinking of all the new young moms who might think this was the way to go because their MW said so makes me want to vomit.


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## Wugmama (Feb 10, 2005)

I don't have any good lit to point you to, but I would definitely NOT use them. I would be ANYWHERE else for a birth than at a place like that with horrible, horrible people like that.

I'm so sorry for you. You must feel so betrayed.








s
Tracy


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## KA29 (Jan 8, 2006)

I couldn't go somewhere that endorsed that either. The Pearls are frightening. They encourage people to be abusive to their children and to stay in abusive relationships.

For example, this little gem (I read this on another message board awhile back and was sickened by it):

http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/index.php?id=75&tx_ttnews[tt_news]=81&tx_ttnews[backPid]=71&tx_ttnews[sViewPointer]=5&cHash=83d53eb1eb

Quote:

But if your husband has sexually molested the children, you should approach him with it. If he is truly repentant (not just exposed) and is willing to seek counseling, you may feel comfortable giving him an opportunity to prove himself, as long as you know the children are safe. If there is any thought that they are not safe, or if he is not repentant and willing to seek help, then go to the law and have him arrested. Stick by him, but testify against him in court. Have him do about 10 to 20 years, and by the time he gets out, you will have raised the kids, and you can be waiting for him with open arms of forgiveness and restitution. Will this glorify God? Forever. You ask, "What if he doesn't repent even then?" Then you will be rewarded in heaven equal to the martyrs, and God will have something to rub in the Devil's face. God hates divorce-always, forever, regardless, without exception.
I can't imagine behaving that way. I just can't imagine it.

This website has some good Christian rebuttals to the Pearl's idea of parenting:

http://www.kjsl.com/~lindav/notrain.htm


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## PaxMamma (Jul 22, 2005)

if you're looking for "pamphlet" type stuff, API at www.attachementparentinginternational.org has a printable pamphlet that you can give her.


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## FlyingPigs (Feb 20, 2005)

I hadn't seen the Pearl's website before...they seem like they HATE children. I was just reading the story about the mother who stopped lpaying volleyball to hit her 18 month old with a switch because she was crying after falling down. This idiot Pearl treated the abuser like a hero.
I am appalled.

One of my nieghbors has been trying to get DH and I into this 'parenting' group where we watch and discuss this sociopath's videos...I knew it was "biblically" based pro-spanking stuff, but had no idea it was this.

I feel sick...


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## elmh23 (Jul 1, 2004)

"I was sorry to hear that you endorse the Pearls. As a result, I will no longer be your client. I don't assosiate with people who advocate child abuse."


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## mommaduck (Sep 13, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *KA29* 
This website has some good Christian rebuttals to the Pearl's idea of parenting:

http://www.kjsl.com/~lindav/notrain.htm

Thank you for this website...looks excellent.


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## SimonsMamma (Jan 12, 2004)

whoa whoa whoa, this is my first encounter with this family. I have heard of the book or seminar, I guess. but, I had no idea..

i am so sorry mamma. I hope you find lots of support to cope with this!

Blessings


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## moonfirefaery (Jul 21, 2006)

Oh my... Ask her if she's read it. If she says yes, say "...So you approve of beating 4 month old babies?!" as if you're in shock. Then tell her how appalling it is to see her agree with that and recommend it to her well-intentioned parent-to-be clients. I would NOT worry about being rude with this issue. IF she says no, fill her in on some of their 'techniques.' I doubt she'll still be recommending it when she reads about the five month old's legs being switched. And yes I too would tell her that I will not be coming back until they stop recommending that trash and start recommending a book such as 'Kids are worth it' Try to be polite of course but do whatever you can to try to get her not to endorse that anymore. She probably just hasn't read it. If she has...then I wouldn't want her for my midwife anyway if she agrees with that. I'd rather go unassisted than support that.

Quote:

the mother who stopped lpaying volleyball to hit her 18 month old with a switch because she was crying after falling down.
Disgusting. That child was hurt and needed her mom's understanding, love, and attention. That baby needed a hug and kiss to make it better. Moms should nurture not beat their child for falling down, being hurt, and reacting naturally with tears. THat makes me want to cry right there.







Everytime I hear about the PEarls book I get sicker and sicker and just want to take all of the little babies they are talking about and cradle them to my breast and tell them it's okay, thye don't deserve that...and demand of their parents how they could buy into that crap and do that to their precious angels, and give them a good GD book.


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## wonderwahine (Apr 21, 2006)

: I can't believe a midwife and birthing center that specifically does those types of birth for the woman AND unborn child, would advocate beating them after birth. Or while breastfeeding to slap them on the face if they bite!


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## Aeress (Jan 25, 2005)

I hadn't read any pf the pearl stuff before, but yes, they must hate children! Even on my worst day, I would not think of my children in the way, they think of children. if obedience was the entire goal of raising children, why give them parents, just let an person of authority raise them...

they are pretty classical behaviorists....*ugh*


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## snugglebutter (Mar 19, 2003)

Ugh, that makes me so







:


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## NC EcoMaMa (Jun 10, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *aja-belly* 
i just found out my midwife and her birthing center are sharing the pearl's newsletter and recommending it and their book 'to train up a child' to new parents. what would you do??

i am so saddened. i worry i won't be able to adress this with my midwife without sounding too rude. of course, it's not an option to just keep quiet. i am trying to compose an e-mail. i need good links or articles to share with her. i thought i may see if anyone here knows of a more gd pamplet or handout i could print up to leave in their office for new parents.

i feel sick just thinking about it.


I don't get to join in conversations here very often, but this is something I am very passionate about. I would tell them first, you will not be going there, and then secondly being the book advocates abuse of infants and children, report them to social services. Make sure to list passages from the book to give to a social worker, like many of the examples below. If social services doesn't do anything about it, talk to your local newspaper or distribute flyers near the place of business to potential clients giving them a heads up about the type of people they are dealing with.
I am not a Christian, but I have many Christian friends and they feel the Pearls are anything but.

I will not shop anywhere that carries their literature and each time I see it, I file a complaint with the local social services.

Hugs,

Jo


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## Ruthla (Jun 2, 2004)

Before leaving their practice, I'd talk to the midwives and find out if they all truly know what that book is about. It might be only one midwife who supports it and maybe the others are ignorant about what the Pearls stand for.


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## cpop (May 3, 2006)

OH MY GOD!
I had never seen the site before and it is soooo scary!

I think the part of it that is the most frightening is that they are sure to make it clear that it is not a matter of losing your temper but more like a cold sadistic thing.
It is a horribly sad thing when parents are incapable of controlling their emotional reactions and abuse their children . . . but this is premeditated, unemotional, long term psychological and physical domination of a helpless child.
I think these people should be arrested for inciting violence against children.
I can't get over it.
If I were you I would run from these midwives and tell them exactly why.


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## ShaggyDaddy (Jul 5, 2006)

My brother says about the pearls: Find the worst book you can about training a dog... now do a find-replace "Puppy" change it to "Child" and you are now a parenting expert.

Oh wait except you can't beat a dog with a switch, that would be inhumane.


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## Finch (Mar 4, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *ShaggyDaddy* 
My brother says about the pearls: Find the worst book you can about training a dog... now do a find-replace "Puppy" change it to "Child" and you are now a parenting expert.

Oh wait except you can't beat a dog with a switch, that would be inhumane.

That is a brilliant summary. Sad, but spot on.


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## moonfirefaery (Jul 21, 2006)

So have you taken any action in this situation? Whatever became of it? Have you/will you talk to the midwife?


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## aja-belly (Oct 7, 2004)

at the moment a close relative is a week away from being full term and is planning a homebirth with this midwife AT MY HOUSE. because of that i'm going to take th next couple of weeks to learn up on the pearls, collect some info and think out what i want to say. i don't want to cause alot of problems with her birth support team right before the big day.


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## wonderwahine (Apr 21, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *aja-belly* 
at the moment a close relative is a week away from being full term and is planning a homebirth with this midwife AT MY HOUSE. because of that i'm going to take th next couple of weeks to learn up on the pearls, collect some info and think out what i want to say. i don't want to cause alot of problems with her birth support team right before the big day.









that seems like a wise move to me.....I wouldnt want to leave a family member with no caregiver at their due date.


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## BeanyMama (Jul 25, 2006)

What a disappointing, sad situation for you. Best of luck.


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## wombatclay (Sep 4, 2005)

There was an article (Salon.com, "Spare the quarter-inch plumbing supply line, spoil the child" May 25, 2006 by Lynn Harris that was picked up by some AP wires I believe) about the Pearls that I saw not long ago. It included information of various court cases dealing with child abuse committed by parents using the Pearls methods. And although the site gets a little strong voiced, there is good information about the book online at http://www.stoptherod.net/ttuac.html to share with someone who maybe is reccommending the book without having read it. Apparently, the Pearls' foundation sends out thousands of free copies every year so in some markets it's sort of a "freebie".

I find it interesting that the book claims that they are teaching "the same principles the Amish use to train their stubborn mules". Why not ask how the Amish train their children, if you really feel the need to bring the Amish into your parenting philosophy? Not to mention I find it highly unlikely that the Amish use pvc piping on either mules or children. We have a large local Amish population and I've certainly never seen anything like that!

bleh


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## moonfirefaery (Jul 21, 2006)

That sounds like a good plan. Keep us posted.


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## phathui5 (Jan 8, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Finch* 
WHAT??!! A _midwife_ practice is recommending them??!!??







: Holy crap.

Pinkmilk, here's a link, warning...it's pretty horrible (child beating discussed/taught):

http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/index.php?id=35

Their book is called To Train Up a Child, where they advocate beating _seven month old babies_. uke

Please put a space in your link so it can't be traced back to here.


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## mollyeilis (Mar 6, 2004)

Who is it that says something like "when someone is telling you who they are, pay attention."? Oprah? Quoting Maya Angelou?

Anyway, this midwife is telling you, or whoever, who she is, what she believes in.

Having been abused and sexually assaulted by my MIDWIFE (screaming at me, abandoning me until I apologized to her, and later, breaking my water as I changed consent, saying "no no no" repeatedly*), and realizing later that I KNEW she was going to be awful....listen to what this woman is telling you (or your friends).

She doesn't have a problem with the Pearls. Or she hasn't read what she's agreeing with. Either way, shows a BAD care provider.

I wouldn't be at all surprised if she treats her clients horribly. After all, if you're going to beat an 18 month old for crying b/c he falls, what are you going to do with an upset very pregnant, possibly in pain, woman if she cries?

No one wants to be the one to find out directly.

I'd rather give your friend the chance to say "I know it" and either amp up her protection OR fire the midwife, rather than after the fact have to say "I knew it", and then have the ultimate blow to find out YOU knew it too....

*and I know that possibly to a victim of stranger assault/rape, or acquaintance/friend/relative assault/rape, it might sound like I'm overstating...but I've known who have experienced both, and they say it's pretty much the same...I don't mean to hurt feelings, but it was my experience and they were my feelings and I have to use the words that I have to use...


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## ShaggyDaddy (Jul 5, 2006)

It makes sense the comments about the bad care provider thing, but that is what makes it so shocking.

We have witnessed and taken part in several births with her as the midwife. We had a great experience and I don't think Aja could have been any more happy with her birth experience.

That is why it feels like such a betrayal, because we have "clicked" with her in the past, spent hours chit-chatting and really consider her to be a like-minded friend.

No offense but there are a lot of ezzo, pearls, child-hating people out there, so you can insulate yourself from them, but when it happens with someone you know, respect, and love it is devistating.

This was a bomb-shell.


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

I apologize if this has been answered, but is she actively recommending it or did you see it lying around on a table somewhere? I mean, she would still be responsible if someone left it there, but is there a chance she doesn't actually know what's going on?


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## monkeys4mama (Apr 25, 2006)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *angelpie545* 
I read that book online for the sake of curiosity-and even myself, a Christian, was absolutely appalled! I know parents who spank and even they would consider that book to be advocating child abuse. The Pearls have a very scary and almost sinister approach to marriage and child rearing. That is NOT what the Bible talks about when it says "Train up a child the way he should go, and when he is older, he will not depart from it". All that verse means is that you should bring a child up to be a decent human being-it DOES NOT mean beat your child with a plastic pipe, or physically punish a baby.


What she said. I'm a Christian too, and always loved this verse. Now I can't read it w/o being reminded of the horrible Pearls and how they've twisted it.







:

About the midwife, it might be worth talking to her about why she advocates the Pearl's approach. If you wanted to reach her, that would be the place to start, by figuring out what it is that she believes to be true or agrees with. I read a bit of the Pearls book online and what I found is that they tend to tell stories of kids out of control or parents doing a poor job or guiding and disciplining their children, then they proceed to describe *their* way and how it would be or is so much better, complete with examples.

I have a theory about how books like this get accepted by people who ought to know better. First of all, by presenting themselves as experts in Christian parenting, they immediately have the attention and implicit trust of many Christian parents. Then, they use examples which most people would agree are "bad examples" of parenting and kid behavior, which engages the reader on their "side" (imagine the reader nodding her head when reading about a parent mismanaging some really outrageous behavior in a child). And then they present *their* way, complete with a shining example of a happy, well-mannered child supposedly resulting from this "method". Hmmm... Makes it sound as if the Pearls have got the answer. Well, to some people anyway. Especially those who are already in a frame of mind to accept the ideas b/c they believe they are reading "Christian" advice.

My thinking is that in order to combat this, we need to determine what points are "capturing" the reader and which we might find a common ground with. These would be the "bad examples". We might well agree that the examples demonstrated parenting approaches that didn't work and kids behavior that wasn't acceptable. But from there, we need to guide the discussion into a phase of critical evalulation of whether the Pearls method is the correct substitute. OK, so there's an example of how NOT to do it. But does it necessarily follow that the Pearl's way is better? Hmmm... Let's see. And from there, we could discuss things like the developmental age and abilities of a child and whether the "training" method is appropriate for them. This is a good place to begin by tearing down the idea that babies should be "trained" by switching. The Pearls would have you believe that little tiny babies are manipulating parents. And beginning "training" in infancy is necessary. Well, you counter there by pointing out that the infant has not got the cognitive ability to manipulate at that age. They are too young. And at this point, it would be ideal to introduce a different *Christian* expert: Dr William Sears. Sears is a Christian, a father of eight, and a pediatrician. Point out that he has much more knowledge of infant and child development than the Pearls, who have no background in child development. Then use Sear's examples and ideas as alternatives to the Pearls, pointing out where they make much better sense, given the age and stage of the child. Show that the Pearls way is not the only way. And in particular, it's not the only *Christian" way.

I hope that made sense. I think that to change people's thinking on this, we need to connect with them someplace so we have a common ground to beging with. The only common ground we may find may be in the desire to raise happy kids who can function well in society. It *is* common ground though. To just get angry and fire off criticism is likely to send people on the defensive and make them cling to the Pearls even more. Instead, if you appear to listen and consider, then offer a good solid alternative and one that's openly Christian as well, you introduce *something to think about* at the very least.

Good luck deciding about the MW. If you just dumped her, I wouldn't blame you. Otoh, if you did get through to her in some way, just think of all the other babies you'd be helping!


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## Greenie (Sep 27, 2005)

I also think it's a good idea to wait until after the birth of your relative's baby... But I don't know if I could even let that woman in my home.







I'm sorry that you're going through this. Poor mama......

I would start interviewing new midwives immidiately (and ask about this type of thing) and postpone any appointments that you have with this woman. I second printing out a volume of information and as soon as that baby is born, go speak with the head honcho of that clinic. Explain until you are blue in the face why you're not going to endorse that [email protected] by being their paitent, and that the book is truly abusive and harmful to children.

Mama, I wanna cry for you.







:


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## georgia (Jan 12, 2003)

Quote:

We have witnessed and taken part in several births with her as the midwife. We had a great experience and I don't think Aja could have been any more happy with her birth experience.










I know a mw with whom I really "connected" with---and felt like she really "got" how many of us feel about birth and parenting---only to discover about a year later that she has absolutely no qualms about spanking children and routine circ.







I know many friends who have used her services and speak highly of her. OTOH, I also know a few women who wouldn't trust their goldfish with her. Honestly, one just never knows. I really like what Molly said about when someone tells you who they are, listen. (I think it _was_ Oprah







)

I do agree with Annette---perhaps the mw doesn't even realize what the contents are all about. I know my mw always had people leaving junk around


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## Fuamami (Mar 16, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *georgia* 
I do agree with Annette---perhaps the mw doesn't even realize what the contents are all about. I know my mw always had people leaving junk around









Yeah, and it seems like at my midwife's, at least half of her clientele ARE people who would probably be into this. In fact, she told me a story of a client of her's who was using Ezzo and she had to report because the baby was starving. So maybe someone was trying to indoctrinate her or something, and had given her the book.


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## aisraeltax (Jul 2, 2005)

i just cant imagine a mw advocating the Pearl's lunacy. would love to see this have a good outcome.


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## ^guest^ (Jul 2, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *georgia* 
I do agree with Annette---perhaps the mw doesn't even realize what the contents are all about. I know my mw always had people leaving junk around










This does seem to happen a lot. Apparently, my MW had some of the Pearl's books in her patient library (she'd just let us borrow books out of her little shelf whenever we felt like it). Many had been donated by past patients. One day she found a few copies of Pearl and Ezzo books in the shelf, checked out several times. She was devestated because she felt that her patients may have thought she actually advocated this, even though it happened without her knowledge. She was a positively wonderful midwife, I could not have asked for a better one, and I would have hated to come across those books myself and assume she advocated them without asking about it directly.


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## aja-belly (Oct 7, 2004)

ok, the birth happened, now what?







i don't feel any better about the situation. if anything i feel worse. i just really love this woman and i feel so so sad about this.

i like this link http://www.kjsl.com/~lindav/notrain.htm since it very much adressing the christian aspect (which i am almost positive is the driving force behind the movement). i think i will draft a letter and packet to send to the birth center (i was there this past week and there are pearl's newsletters ALL OVER THE PLACE).







so everyone there is either in agreement, or has no clue.

i am also going to write a letter to her hopefully opening a dialoque about it.

i think i might also see if some mamas that i know that feel the same way and used that center or midwife would also send letters.

any other advice?


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## townmouse (May 3, 2004)

Read spunky's blog about the Pearls...a conservative Christian homeschool mama of 6 who really liked the Pearls until she learned more about them. She gets down to the nitty gritty of the Bible stuff, and went thru alot when she revoked all support of the Pearls.

www.spunkyhomeschool.blogspot.com here is the first part of the review...starts nice but really gathers steam in later parts http://spunkyhomeschool.blogspot.com...et-part-1.html

The Pearls are so dangerous. On the face of things, they are kinda crunchy (breastfeed, co-sleep, herbs, natural living, cloth diapering and EC, etc) so since that stuff is trendy now alot of Christian women are sucked in. Next thing they know, it is baby-whipping and spousal abuse and all in the name of God.









Good thoughts for strength and peace for you!


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## kindergirl77 (Jun 30, 2005)

I know that some gals here are on Gentle christian mothers.com who can deeply get into biblical conversation about this- there are some already written letters there in objection to the Pearls teachings in churches.

I also found a flier in my midwife packet late in my pregnancy, and I had to have a talk to my midwife about giving out the Pearl flyers as well. She was the only choice for me, and she was a great midwife, but loved the Pearl's homeschooling info. Blech blech blech!! She told me that she didn't care for their 'training' sessions, but used other useful info from them and blew it off like it was no big deal. I don't think she gives the fliers out anymore, but she no longer has a place of practice at the moment.
I definetley let her know that her fliers were highly controversial, since there has been a recent death in connection with the Pearls parenting advice- I would definetley mention that. I'll see if I can find the link for you.


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## kindergirl77 (Jun 30, 2005)

This is just so sick *warning- its sensitive*
http://www.newsobserver.com/102/story/418676.html


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## phathui5 (Jan 8, 2002)

kindergirl,

I would tell your midwife that there are lots of other good homeschooling resources that aren't nearly as offensive to people in the natural parenting community. Suggest some even.


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## m9m9m9 (Jun 13, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *kindergirl77* 
This is just so sick *warning- its sensitive*
http://www.newsobserver.com/102/story/418676.html

I agree with you BUT on the other hand it does bring it to the attention of the public and just how absolutely terrible the methods in fact are and hopefully someone who actually follows the Pearls teaching and reads the article will take a step back and realize what type of abuse they are inflicting on their child.

I found it horrible that a woman is quoted as saying "Some people are just queasy about swatting their kids." in an article that discusses a child suffering from physical abuse. And worse, shouldn't she wonder WHY people feel sick about hitting their children???

Maggie


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