# S/O: What's the worst parenting thing YOU ever said before you were a parent?



## HappyMommy2 (Jan 27, 2007)

I laugh about some of the things I used to think/say/advise, prior to actually becoming a parent.

Whenever somebody says "I never..." or "My kids never..." My Mom always says "Be careful what you say, because your kids will make a liar out of you!!"

After seeing the floor of my cousin's car, I thought to myself "I will never let MY kids eat in the car!"

Yeah right! I could feed a family of four on the cheerios and goldfish under the carseats!! (Haha, not literally, of course!!)

What did you used to think or say, before your kids taught you better?????


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## ~Charlie's~Angel~ (Mar 17, 2008)

I made a comment about it being ridiculous about a 3 year old still not being potty trained. That was about 2 years ago. Check out my location. Yea,
















ETA, HUmble pie tastes like @$$!


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## mamazee (Jan 5, 2003)

Something about not putting up with tantrums. And then I had the older one. Ack! I think when you make comments like that, God takes it as an opportunity to teach you a lesson in humility by giving you a child who proves you wrong.


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## jnet24 (Sep 4, 2006)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *mamazee*
> 
> Ack! I think when you make comments like that, God takes it as an opportunity to teach you a lesson in humility by giving you a child who proves you wrong.


Yeah I used to think once a baby turned around one they should no longer have a pacifier. Then my son came along and just gave it up on his own last week at two months shy of FOUR!


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## prothyraia (Feb 12, 2007)

I don't remember the things I said (I've blocked them out, probably), but AFTER I had kids I do remember thinking "I will never..." or "My kids won't..." after seeing or hearing about other children's behavior.

And I swear, every single time I've thought that, guess what happened a few years later?

Broke that habit! :lol:


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## oaktreemama (Oct 12, 2010)

I remember when my friends had their first kid and they did not believe in CIO. I thought they were crazy. I was all like, 'just put the kid down and let him cry. He'll go to sleep eventually." I also couldn't understand WHY they insisted on being home ALL the time-refused for the first year or so to even go out at night if it meant missing bed time. Drove me nuts.

Fast forward to now and I have a 2 1/2 yr old who snuggles next to me every night and who has never CIO'd nor slept away from me for even one night.


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## HappyMommy2 (Jan 27, 2007)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *~Charlie's~Angel~*
> 
> I made a comment about it being ridiculous about a 3 year old still not being potty trained. That was about 2 years ago. Check out my location. Yea,
> 
> ...


LOL!!!!


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## KayTeeJay (Jul 22, 2008)

I remember hearing about extended nursers and saying "Uh, yeah, if they're old enough to ask for it, they don't need it anymore/it's gross/weird, etc..." Hmm, guess whose son most politely says "I hab ninnies peas?" before bedtime every night?


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## laohaire (Nov 2, 2005)

At my wedding I had some family I don't see too often, and that included a 3 year old boy. He had a meltdown the morning on the wedding (not AT the wedding, just before) and I was saying something about him acting like a brat just when his father came out the door. I have no idea if he heard it or not, but it rests on my heart that I even thought that... hello, 3 year olds have tantrums! I can't believe I even thought that, much less said it out loud.

- Mom of 5 year old who STILL has some tantrums


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## AtYourCervices (Feb 22, 2009)

"I'll leave the circumcision decision up to my husband... after all, he's the one with the penis." Thankfully, our first child was a girl.

"If they're old enough to say 'Please, mother, may I have some milk from your breasts?' they're too old to nurse." My daughter is turning 4 in a couple months and she's still nursing.


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## CatsCradle (May 7, 2007)

"No toys for my future children. Only books and supplies."

Uh huh. Right.


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## Super~Single~Mama (Sep 23, 2008)

I said I wouldn't breastfeed b/c its gross, and formula is just as good. Uhh....yeah, says the mom who still NIP's her 22mo! LOL! (I'm kind of a lactivist too, had a LONG discussion with my cousin about why its best just a few days ago LOL!)

ETA - YAY MDC cause this is the forum that got me to even THINK about it!!


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## Owen'nZoe (Sep 7, 2005)

Yep, another one who had issues with extended nursing before. I though my cousin, who nursed her girls to age 2 was crazy. I've now nursed two kids past age 4.


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## Juvysen (Apr 25, 2007)

I definitely said "if they're old enough to ask for it, they're too old for it" in regards to breastfeeding and diaper changes (i.e. they should be potty trained early)... And then my DD started asking for diaper changes AND mama milk before she hit a year... and then I nursed her until she was 2 1/2 (um, but she did potty train before 2)... Ds1 is still not completely trained at 3 1/2.

I'm sure I said a lot of other stupid things, too. LOL


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## wookie (Dec 12, 2008)

Then: "Why will that 4yo not say hi to me when I chirp it to him? Huh, weird. I'll make sure MY kid NEVER does that. Hmph." :lol

Now: "Ds, for the 2598th time, why don't you say hi when someone says hi to you? Becauuuuse, I don't want to." Oh.


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## Areia (Mar 5, 2009)

I once told my cousin that I'd teach my one year old to behave - she'd never try to pull books from the bookshelves.


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## lilyka (Nov 20, 2001)

hahaha! What didn't I say! Even after I had my first one I thought she was the way she was because of my spectacular parenting. Then came #2. She still challenges me in every way.


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## marinak1977 (Feb 24, 2009)

I could never walk around with spit up on my clothes. Yuck, gross!

One day DS spit up on top of my head while in backcarry and I calmly thought "I guess I'll have to take a shower... ... later"


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## KempsMama (Dec 1, 2008)

Let's see, where to begin!! I said I'd never have a baby in bed with me... Now by 3 a.m. there's four of us crammed into the full size bed. If only I hadn't been in denial about co sleeping maybe I would have shelled out for a queen at least when we got married. LOL.


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## texmati (Oct 19, 2004)

I'd never have a section, supplement or use disposables... ummmm... now I know!


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## dakotablue (Jun 21, 2009)

another one who thought asking for nursing was weird. I never thought I'd cosleep and one big one

I never thought I'd let my kid eat food off the floor (my floor not other places..I still don't do that)


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## WifeMomChiro (Jul 28, 2010)

I think I said that I would never "allow" my child to throw a fit at the store. Little did I know that there is no stopping a fit once it gets started. I've actually let my child roll around throwing a fit on the floor of Costco before.


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## AFWife (Aug 30, 2008)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *WifeMomChiro*
> 
> I think I said that I would never "allow" my child to throw a fit at the store. Little did I know that there is no stopping a fit once it gets started. I've actually let my child roll around throwing a fit on the floor of Costco before.


LMAO! Totally! "I won't let my child act like that!" in the direction of the mom with the toddler screaming in fury.

Yeah, because you can totally see it coming and then prevent it.


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## cyclamen (Jul 10, 2005)

I don't remember saying too much about parenting before I had a kid because I figured... what do I know about kids? Except once, in a discussion about breastfeeding with other non-moms who were mostly critical of the idea, I said something like, "BF is good, although maybe once they can ask it's time to start thinking about weaning?"

Because I had NO IDEA that babies began being able to communicate/talk around the age of one. I seriously though it was like 3 or 4 years before a kid could talk.


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## AFWife (Aug 30, 2008)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *cyclamen*
> 
> I don't remember saying too much about parenting before I had a kid because I figured... what do I know about kids? Except once, in a discussion about breastfeeding with other non-moms who were mostly critical of the idea, I said something like, "BF is good, although maybe once they can ask it's time to start thinking about weaning?"
> 
> Because I had NO IDEA that babies began being able to communicate/talk around the age of one. I seriously though it was like 3 or 4 years before a kid could talk.


Not to mention that once you get cued into your child you can tell when your 1 month old is "asking" for it!


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## cyclamen (Jul 10, 2005)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *AFWife*
> 
> Quote:
> 
> ...


Oh of course. I also thought that babies had to cry to "talk" to you. My uncle called me up right before my daughter was born and gave me one of the best piece of newborn advice I received from anyone I knew, which was, "Don't wait for the baby to cry. Pay attention. You will be able to tell what she needs. So you will feed the baby before she cries, change her diaper before she cries, hold her before she cries. Then she will trust you." This was nicely balanced by my BF's mom's advice which was, "Sometimes babies cry." Hah! She's raised 4 kids, so she knew what she was talking about.


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## intentionalmama (Aug 23, 2008)

Oh, I still cringe whenever I think about it. I was single and living in an apartment. I went down to the apartment below me and knocked on the door. A tired woman answered the door. I introduced myself and said something like, "Oh, do you have a new baby?" She smiled and said yes. Now, I cringe.... I said nicely, "Well, your baby is keeping me up all night. Every two hours I wake up." I think she probably looked a bit stunned and didn't know what to say. I then suggested that perhaps she could move the baby to the other room. Not too long after that she moved. And the thing is I didn't get that what I had said was so so wrong until I had my own child. I feel bad to this day about it. I wish that I could meet with her and apologize for being such an idiot.


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## DariusMom (May 29, 2005)

I said something ridiculous about how my step-sister was "spoiling" her 9 month old by holding him all the time. I feel like an idiot, now, even after all these years.


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## ~Charlie's~Angel~ (Mar 17, 2008)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *DariusMom*
> 
> I said something ridiculous about how my step-sister was "spoiling" her 9 month old by holding him all the time. I feel like an idiot, now, even after all these years.


 You are not alone. Ive pulled this little gem before, even with my own child.


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## LauraN (May 18, 2004)

I told my good friend, in a horrified voice, that her 3 yr old was much too old to still be sleeping with her. Luckily, she got to laugh at me recently because my 6 yr old still sleeps in our family bed along with my 3 yr old.


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## honeybee (Mar 12, 2004)

When a coworker mentioned she slept with her baby, I busted out with "Aren't you afraid you'll smother him?!"

Mmmm... yeah, guess where all my babies sleep.

And then I also thought dn's various behaviors were due to parenting style... not attached enough. Because she actually included time-outs in her imaginary play, and of course, WE would figure out how to use positive discipline only and have kids who behaved well because they were so attached. Guess whose kids are regularly put into time-out?


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## liberal_chick (May 22, 2005)

I was so anti co-sleeping before I had kids. I think the phrase out of my mouth was something like "My bed is for mommy and daddy. They can sleep in a crib." Little did I know that A) I'd be nervous with a wee bitty baby all the way in a crib and B) I love co-sleeping! So easy in the middle of the night.

I was also determined to spank my kids. I was always talking about what behaviors just needed a good spanking to cure. Ugh.


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## Butterflykate (Aug 2, 2010)

when a teenager.

"When there old enough to talk they can stop breast feeding" <- wrong! they learn to talk a lot sooner than I ever thought! (I'm also a fan of breast feeding now, a bit longer than society deems acceptable anyway)

"My children will never sleep in my bed" <- I love co-sleeping now!! and I love the bond I built with all my children

and the most horrible thing I ever said  and how ashamed I am to admit it...

"If I have a special needs child I don't think I could love them" <- how wrong I was, and how happy I am with miss 21 for all the wonderful joys, smiles, giggles and love given by her, and for allowing me to give them back!

a friend of mine who doesn't have children told me the other day by 4 children should be night toilet trained though, I had to laugh at that, what a mission it was for Miss 7.


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## isabchi (Sep 14, 2006)

Me so Guilty, guilty, Guilty!

I used to say that C-section as "easy " way to deliver a baby. I really want to skip the pain of labor and vaginal birth. Well, I end up to have an unnecessary C-section and was very traumatic and way more painful.

I really though that little babies need schedules and used to be under the care of many people other that the mom, so the child could "socialize" from very early on and no be spoiled.....Then my first was a High Spirited.... I been eating and and each one of my words.


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## lilylumos (Oct 26, 2009)

I told my friend "oh just put that baby in daycare and get back to your life already!"


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## Marsupialmom (Sep 28, 2003)

I said my kids would never sleep with me. Kids that did that became monsters. Little did I realize the limited experience I had with a child that co-sleep was the child every co-sleeping story was written about. I know now what the grandparents and mom did wrong to create that child.

I thought that nursing an 18 month old was "off". I knew they recommended off the bottle at 1. At 17, I thought that applied to breastfeeding and said something along that line to a coworker when I found out her coworker's sister was nursing an 18month old. When I was nursing my first one at a LLL I thought it odd for this one lady to be still nursing a 2 year old. All My children weaned after they were 2. My middle child nursed until shortly after her 4th birthday.

Then there was the one lady I talked about. Didn't say anything to her directly. She had like 6 kids. I was in the doctor's office with my first. This lady just let the baby's head flop maybe 4 months oldest. Didn't try to adjust it. Then I had my third child who was happiest in that floppy head looking position. I think it enable her to easily watch her entertainment system -- her brother and sister.


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## Magali (Jun 8, 2007)

I encouraged my sister to let her dd CIO, thought 14 months was too old to be breastfeeding still, and said that my kids would NEVER sleep in a bed with me. These aren't funny, these are horrible


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## kythe (Dec 20, 2007)

When I was pregnant with my firstborn, I couldn't figure out why I was the only person in our childbirth class (out of 8 couples) who would circumcise a boy. I thought all the other parents just didn't understand that circ'ed penises are cleaner. Even the Jewish couple were considering keeping their son intact despite their families' protests, because they didn't personally see a reason to circ.

I had a girl, but I'll admit that it was the Jewish family that planted the biggest seed in me. By the time my son came along, I had done more research online and was very anti-circ as well. I sometimes wish I could have a reunion with my first childbirth class to have this discussion again.


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## pranava (Aug 11, 2007)

I will not give my baby or toddler sugar!!

DS loves cake, cookies, candy, chocolate, ice cream, suckers, you name it. People kept putting sweets in his mouth starting at the age of 4 months! I finally gave up the fight around 12 months. I still try hard to limit this, but DS definitely has had his fair shair of sugar.


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## mirlee (Jul 30, 2002)

I told my best friend that I thought her sleeping with her daughter was absolutely wrong and that everyone has their own bedroom for a reason. Now, this was an odd thing for me to say. I had been a nanny at one point and would often have the kids crawl in the big bed with me. As a parent, I wouldn't have made it sanely to my son's 2nd birthday if we didn't co-sleep. I actually apologized to her for my comment once I became a parent.


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## baglady (Jul 13, 2009)

I said that I would never breastfeed because it's gross; I would never let a child sleep in my bed; and that babies need to CIO to get on a sleep "schedule." It's kind of funny because I can't sleep when he's not in the bed with me. Thank goodness I followed my instincts once the LO was born.


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## lovepiggie (May 10, 2009)

Same thing about the extended breastfeeding thing! I said it months before I got pregnant... I also thought home births were CRAZY, and no one in their right mind would do it. Same with cosleeping...

Thank you MDC for helping me see the light  And, actually, a particular member of MDC who directed me here... I keep thinking I should send her a message thanking her for sending me this link because it has made me such a better person...


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## One_Girl (Feb 8, 2008)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Super~Single~Mama*
> 
> I said I wouldn't breastfeed b/c its gross, and formula is just as good. Uhh....yeah, says the mom who still NIP's her 22mo! LOL! (I'm kind of a lactivist too, had a LONG discussion with my cousin about why its best just a few days ago LOL!)
> 
> ETA - YAY MDC cause this is the forum that got me to even THINK about it!!


I was the same way. I was talking to a friend about how gross nursing is a few weeks before I found out I was pregnant and when I told my mom after I was pregnant she told me she hoped I would try it and we went for 3 and a half years, I also scolded a lady at Job Service for asking me to nurse somewhere else and told her to tell the pervert who complained to stop staring at my chest. I also used to say I would just walk away if my child had a tantrum and I was always the mom consoling her upset child (though not giving in). I was an advocate of spanking also until I had my dd then I threatened divorce if her dad so much as thought about spanking or time-out as a viable option. You would think I would learn from the pre-child time and not make comments about what kids and parents should do, but I also have found myself in the trap of thinking a child is way to old to act a certain way until my child gets to that age and also acts that way because that age is still so young. I hope I am past saying stupid things about parenting now. I tell my non-parenting friends that I used to have things all planned out and then reality hit when I actually had a real kid when they start to come at me with parenting thoughts..


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## Belia (Dec 22, 2007)

My sister lives in Ohio and it was the weekend of her wedding. The day before all of the bridesmaids were having a spa / lunch day. The Maid of Honor had 3 kids at the time in daycare and she worked full time. I asked her (MOH) who was watching the kids at home, and she said she sent them to daycare for those 2 days so that she could hang out with the other women and have fun.

I was SCANDALIZED. I remember thinking, "Your kids are in daycare 40 hours a week anyway, and on your day off you STILL send them there? Why have kids if you don't want to raise them?" I just assumed that she should spend EVERY. AVAILABLE. MINUTE with her kids to make up for the fact that they were in daycare.

Ummmm.... flash forward 10 years. I work full time, send my kid to an AWESOME day care provider, and yesterday, even though I had the day off for Thanksgiving, I sent him to school anyway. Just so I could sleep in and do some scrapbooking.

Man, I was so ignorant.


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## stormborn (Dec 8, 2001)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *lilyka*
> 
> hahaha! What didn't I say! Even after I had my first one I thought she was the way she was because of my spectacular parenting. Then came #2. She still challenges me in every way.


Yup. I don't think I said any of it out loud, but oh, GOD, I was so smug! I really believed #1 stayed with me in public, didn't really pitch fits, didn't hit or bite, etc. was because I was doing it right! Wroooong.


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## contactmaya (Feb 21, 2006)

When i was told you have to nurse your newborn at least every couple of hours, i was like, no way! Ill never nurse him that often! Maybe every 6hours. Yeah, i'll do that....


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## an_aurora (Jun 2, 2006)

We would never co-sleep, because of course they would still be in our bed until age 14 if we did that. People who didn't vaccinate were crazy. Luckily i was determined to BF, and we knew that baby would be intact if it was a boy.


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## DaughterOfKali (Jul 15, 2007)

When I was a nanny, I thought the parents were silly to cosleep with their 5 yr old.

Also, I didn't realize that there was such a thing as a Reluctant Feeder/Eater. I just assumed the child was picky and needed more discipline.


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## MrsBone (Apr 20, 2004)

I always said I was never going to co-sleep past 6 months, breastfeed past 18 months(I thought it just was weird after that). I had lots of time tables for my kiddo and have broken all of them. The only reason DS weaned at 20 months was because my milked dried up due to pregnancy! Oh and we are still co-sleeping. I always had very negative thoughts whenever I saw parents at the grocery store with a screaming kid. I thought, come on...how hard could it be? Yeah, never thinking that way again. While my son is pretty well behaved at the grocery store, I know for a fact that a kid is not "bad" if he acts out that way. It's a part of growing, and now I'm more likely to help a parent out at the store than silently judge! Also, I was a nanny before having kids to one little girl. I watched her from the time she was 4 weeks to 26 months. The family had a housekeeper that did most of the laundry, lawncare, pretty much everything taken care of, and all I had to do was play with the kid, do a couple of loads of kids laundry and sweep the floor at the end of my 6 hour shift. I thought to myself..this is easy! I can do this. Yeah. we don't have a housekeeper, lawn person, or anything like that..it's a lot more work than my 18 hour/week nanny job!  Oh, and also I have realized that no matter what you do to prepare yourself for having a kid, you will not know what you are doing, ever. It's a learning process like everything else and there's no "right way" to do it!


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## 3xMama (Oct 14, 2010)

I think the stupidest thing I ever thought (but never said aloud) about having kids was about how easy newborn baby care would be. I was so sure it wouldn't be any harder than taking care of a dog. Feed 'em, rock 'em, change their diaper, lay 'em down and they'll fall right asleep no problem. Yeeeeaaaahhhhh.....I got my butt handed to me!!!









I also did the "if they are old enough to ask for it, they don't need it" thing about BFing.


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## waiting2bemommy (Dec 2, 2007)

I read somewhere when i was nannying that once babies are 10lbs they are able to go all night ithout feeding. so, I always said "i'm not getting out of my bed in the middle of the night for MY baby when I have one." now its true that i don't get pu of my bed at night, bu that's because I'm attachedatthe nipple to Barracuda Baby who nursesatwill all night long!

Oh and I wasnt going to bf either, but I stumbled onto MDC and actually what initially attracted me was the rebellion factor. (I was 19, ok) I read all these posts in lactivism forum about moms being harrassed for nursing and was like "that is so WRONG...I'm gonna bf this baby in public everywhere just to make my point!" lol.


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## Forthwith (Aug 6, 2007)

I don't think I was too bad. My sister is six years younger than me, and my mom babywore/cloth diapered/nursed to age 3, so I knew that was all good. I was pretty sure that in-the-bed cosleeping wasn't for me though. Other people - sure, but not me! We bought an armsreach cosleeper, but after a week of passing out in bed while nursing, I gave in to the inevitable.









Quote:


> Originally Posted by *3xMama*
> 
> I think the stupidest thing I ever thought (but never said aloud) about having kids was about how easy newborn baby care would be. I was so sure it wouldn't be any harder than taking care of a dog. Feed 'em, rock 'em, change their diaper, lay 'em down and they'll fall right asleep no problem. Yeeeeaaaahhhhh.....I got my butt handed to me!!!


I don't know.... Sure, my baby spent his entire first 4 months being held, and woke me up in the middle of the night, but at least he never ate an entire package of fish oil supplements. The house stank of fish oil for weeks. He oozed it out of every pore. Just thinking about it makes me want to cry.


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## weliveintheforest (Sep 3, 2005)

I am totally guilty of saying to dh "When they can walk up to me and ask for it, they are too old to nurse!" I probably also said lots of things about not letting my kids act in certain ways but they have been forgotten.


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## Super~Single~Mama (Sep 23, 2008)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Kelmendi*
> 
> I don't think I was too bad. My sister is six years younger than me, and my mom babywore/cloth diapered/nursed to age 3, so I knew that was all good. I was pretty sure that in-the-bed cosleeping wasn't for me though. Other people - sure, but not me! We bought an armsreach cosleeper, but after a week of passing out in bed while nursing, I gave in to the inevitable.
> 
> ...


Oh no!!! Fish oil smells terrible!!!


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## 3xMama (Oct 14, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Super~Single~Mama*
> 
> Quote:
> 
> ...


Yikes!! Well, it is true that my baby didn't end up eating and oozing fish oil (the thought of smelling doggy fish oil for weeks on end makes me shudder!!), we had problems nursing and she was pretty high needs for the first several months. For the first two weeks of her life (or longer, I don't really remember now, its all a haze) DH and I had to take two hour shifts with her at night walking to keep her from crying nonstop. I knew nothing of AP, if I had, it probably would've helped a lot! And given that my dogs had been pretty low maintence, I had no idea it could ever be so difficult!


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## minkajane (Jun 5, 2005)

About birth - "I'm getting every drug I can get!" By the time I was pregnant with DS, I was planning a UC and with this little one, I'm planning a UBAC.


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## sunflwrmoonbeam (Oct 9, 2006)

I honestly believed that if you kept the baby fed, held, and clean, they wouldn't cry. Boy was I in for a rude awakening!


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## alexsam (May 10, 2005)

First, I'd like to say this is an excellent thread!

Second, I think it is SO interesting that the "silly things we thought before" are on BOTH ends of the spectrum, from "I would NEVER use a disposable!" to "I thought bf was terrible!" and it really shows that you don't know 'till you get there and that extremes and prejudgement are the problem







.

OK- now for mine! Before kids, my husband and I talked about how caring for our dog was *just like* how it would be with kids. We remembered this recently and we both ended up crying we were laughing so hard at how rediculus this was. OK, kids! Into the crate while we go out to the movies!

I remember being HORRIFIED at the idea of the screaming toddler in Walmart and the frazzled mother in sweatpants shoving cookies at her kid to get them to be quiet. I mean, this is an opportunity to have a pleasant educational conversation! And, how about something besides cookies, huh? Well, guess who found herself on virtually no sleep with a teething toddler at Walmart at 6 am feeding them cookies and grumbling about "A minute of peace and quiet, for the love of God!". I think we all know.

I remember I was going to "shoot for" 6 months of breastfeeding. Yeah. 3 years later, we weaned.

I'm a teacher and thought that public school had a place for everyone. Guess whose kid is in private school?

I remember looking at dirty toddlers thinking "Can't someone get this kid a wet cloth and wipe his mouth and nose?" I found myself with my oldest at 2 years old on a summer night in a speedo-style cloth bathing suit and nothing else, covered in juice to which a fine layer of dirt had made patters all over his face and body, running around on the sidewalk and licking his foot. Yeah. A proud moment in parenting. Same for "Can't they put a coat on that toddler? It's freezing!" and "Is it SO hard to put matching clothes on a kid? Do they always have to look so disheveled?"

Next up is "I will NEVER let them eat in the car!", "I will never own a mini-van!", "Why do these parents take so many pictures of their kids?", "Poop is gross and I don't know how I will change a diaper.", "I'll be wearing my pre-materinty clothes again in 3 months.", "My kids will never hit the other kids at the playground or say mean things ever!", "I love to travel, so we'll just take the kids on vacation! I'm sure a 6 hour plane ride and a hotel is not a big deal.", "My son will NEVER play 'guns' or killing!", and many, many others.

Then there were some that were seriously dangerous, like "I will be a perfect mother." and "I will never get angry." and "I should always put my child before my own needs" (not understanding that virtually all of these situations are a compromise with many possibilities, not either-or) and "One mistake and the kid is screwed up for life.". They were harder to dislodge and come to terms with.

Oh, my poor pre-kid self. I was so... clueless!


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## meemee (Mar 30, 2005)

"leashes? LEASHES?!!! what?!!! leashes are for DOGS not children. i will never...." HAH!!!! the peace of just having the leash was such a stress reducer, though we used it for a short while.

"my child is NEVER going to go out dirty with dirt all over face and on clothes." HAH!!!! i cant remember the others.

"oh what a bratty kid" to the 3 year old throwing a tantrum. HAH!!!

i will say though, it has made me v. sympathetic to others who say something without having a child of their own, whether older (beyond child bearing years) or younger. somehow their words just dont hurt me.


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## Super~Single~Mama (Sep 23, 2008)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *alexsam*
> 
> Oh, my poor pre-kid self. I was so... clueless!


Me too. I just don't have as good a memory as you do (toddler brain anyone??) about my pre-kid self - I have trouble remembering to eat 3 meals a day!


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## *MamaJen* (Apr 24, 2007)

In general, I was a terrific parent up until I had kids, lol. I used to think natural childbirth was some kind of tool of the patriarchal oppression. Nowadays? I'm studying public policy and public health to improve access to midwifery. I also used to think that cosleeping was uber-creepy and extended breastfeeding was gross.


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## berry987 (Apr 23, 2008)

I don't think I ever said it, but I definitely thought it - that women who stay home with their kids are lame and have an easy job and just don't have any career goals. That was when I was a childless "career woman" with lofty goals and sooo much stress in my life. Ha. Now I'm a SAHM to three kids and realize that I knew nothing about exhaustion and stress and choosing to SAH has nothing to do with lacking career goals. I was so smug and annoying.


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## hasya (Jun 27, 2010)

Poopy diaper changes are gross. Talking about baby poop is worse. Refer to my earlier posts...


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## Super~Single~Mama (Sep 23, 2008)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *hasya*
> 
> Poopy diaper changes are gross.


Poopy diaper changes ARE gross. Just sayin, there are things I'd rather do.....


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## ~Charlie's~Angel~ (Mar 17, 2008)

I just took this Friday off. I have time to use before the year is over. I am TOTALLY sending the kids to school so I can get my hair done.









Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Belia*
> 
> My sister lives in Ohio and it was the weekend of her wedding. The day before all of the bridesmaids were having a spa / lunch day. The Maid of Honor had 3 kids at the time in daycare and she worked full time. I asked her (MOH) who was watching the kids at home, and she said she sent them to daycare for those 2 days so that she could hang out with the other women and have fun.
> 
> ...


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## goinggreengirl (Nov 7, 2009)

I said the "when they can ask for it, they are too old for it," about breastfeeding. My baby is 8 months old and has asked for it very clearly since day one! Dive bombing my chest is his current way of letting me know.

I said I'd never use cloth diapers because they were gross.

I've judged moms about tantrums in the store... not looking forward to eating those words in a year or two!


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## heathenmom (Mar 9, 2005)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *lilyka*
> 
> hahaha! What didn't I say! Even after I had my first one I thought she was the way she was because of my spectacular parenting. Then came #2. She still challenges me in every way.


This.


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## newbiemama09 (Dec 17, 2009)

i said i would never cloth diaper, never co-sleep, i wasn't keen on baby-wearing, and i wouldn't BF past a year. well, look at my life now! i'm glad my kid shapped me up!


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## hasya (Jun 27, 2010)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Super~Single~Mama*
> 
> Quote:
> 
> ...


Nah, they're not a roll in flower petals but it isn't as gross as I pictured it, probably because dd's almost solely bfed as of now.


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## texmati (Oct 19, 2004)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *hasya*
> 
> Quote:
> 
> ...


oh... it gets so, so, so very much worse when they are on solids.


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## *Lisa* (Dec 19, 2002)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *heathenmom*
> 
> Quote:
> 
> ...


My aunt likes to say that she feels sorry for people with only one child because they take far more credit and blame than they should. I understand that comment a lot better since having child number two.


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## Caneel (Jun 13, 2007)

I cringe at the thought of some of the pre-parent statements that came out of my mouth. Bless my friends, they all just smiled and nodded at my very stupid as-vice.


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## kythe (Dec 20, 2007)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by **Lisa**
> 
> Quote:
> 
> ...


Yes, I completely agree with this also. #1 was happy, healthy, and easygoing, and I thought I was the best mom in the world. That was before Mr. Colic and Always Sick was born... It definately changes your perspective.


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## Super~Single~Mama (Sep 23, 2008)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *texmati*
> 
> Quote:
> 
> ...


Oh yeah, just wait until your baby is almost 2yo, eating mostly solids, and the poop is just DISGUSTING. Seriously, I can't wait till ds PL's. Not that I'm particularly looking forward to that adventure....


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## ~Charlie's~Angel~ (Mar 17, 2008)

Gee why not? Its soooooooo much fun!

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Super~Single~Mama*
> 
> Quote:
> 
> ...


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## hasya (Jun 27, 2010)

Wow, you guys! You're so encouraging about future diaper gifts! . I'd prefer not to think of what's to come.


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## Kreeblim (Dec 19, 2009)

My big one was "ADHD doesn't exist". I didn't think it was over diagnosed, or misdiagnosed...just factually not a thing. I figured it was always just a gifted or creative kid that couldn't handle the slower pace of school, or possibly a different disorder or food allergy that was lumped into the "catch all" diagnosis of ADHD. I even thought some people just said their child had ADHD as an excuse for not disciplining them.







This comes from having been misdiagnosed with it myself as a child, which was not a good thing in my situation.

Now I have a 6 year old that has such CLEAR problems with attention and sitting still that I feel like such an idiot. Behavioral tactics for ADHD have helped ENORMOUSLY and I am still resistant to using medications, but there is such a difference at all stages between him and my 5 year old just in energy and distractability that I know it's a real thing and not just a product of environment. There are times when he WANTS to do something like read a book, but halfway through a sentence he is so distracted by the picture that he loses his place in the sentence and has to start from scratch (sometimes multiple times on one page, which makes him very frustrated)! Now he uses a blank index card to cover pictures so he can decode the words first...we have many of these "tricks" to use to be able to focus long enough to get something done, and ways to wear off that pent up energy in various situations so he doesn't cause a disruption.

I still think it can be misdiagnosed, and was over diagnosed for many years, but I've eaten my words on most of the rest of my "ADHD is fake" rant from years ago.


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## kblackstone444 (Jun 17, 2007)

"I will never spitwash my baby's face. That's disgusting." Perhaps disgusting, but... guilty as charged.

"Boys have to be circumcised to look like everybody else." Wish I knew the facts before my first son, glad I know the facts now that I'm having a second son.

"Pacifiers are awful- I'd NEVER use one." As a Mother of a formally very high needs baby who used ME as a pacifier 24/7, let me tell you, if this new baby wants a paci, he'll get a paci.

"Babies need to sleep in cribs." And then I had my son... he slept in his bassinet halfway through the first night, and then I realized how unnatural it felt... he returned to his own bed at 8 years old.

"Children are fully capable of being potty trained at 2 years old." My first son apparently didn't get the memo- he was 3 years, 10 months before he potty trained.


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