# Boating with a toddler (and a baby)



## SueZVudu (Jul 6, 2002)

We're moving back to Oklahoma next month, and the ILs are already starting with the boat stuff. They have a pontoon type boat up at a lake a couple of hours away from where we live, and they want us to come with them on the weekends and stay at the lake. They even bought a Ford Excursion w/ DVD player so DD (almost 2 yrs old) can be "entertained" during the long drives (which is another issue altogether...grrr.) They haven't asked us how we feel about our two girls being on a boat, and I have to admit that I really don't like the idea. Our daughters are 23 months and 5 months old. What the *#&$% do they think a toddler and a baby are going to do on a boat??? It's like a large playpen! And don't even get me started on the safety issues. Okay, I'll get started on safety anyway. I grew up in a town with about a dozen lakes within a 15 minute drive, and I've heard too many horror stories about boating accidents to ever feel comfortable out on the lake. Boats running into each other, carbon monoxide poisoning, drowning accidents, drunk boaters....it all scares me. Are there any statistics about boating safety and babies that can either confirm or quell my worries? If we do go out on the boat, what can we do to make sure our girls are as safe as possible? And what on earth are they going to do on a boat?


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## oceanbaby (Nov 19, 2001)

Well, I admit that I am a paranoid mommy, and I am a little afraid of the water, but I refused to take ds on any boat, even a ferry, when he was a baby. He's almost 3yo and I still haven't done it. I just couldn't imagine how I would keep us both safe in the water if anything happened. If the boat capsizes, how exactly do you keep yourself, a toddler, and a baby up and out of the water? Lifejackets are great, sure, but that doesn't help the baby much. People who spend a lot of time boating and in the water probably feel a lot more secure about it, but it always made me very nervous.

And don't even get me started on the DVD player in the car! My in-laws have a vacation house about 4 hours from here, and nagged us for months to allow them to buy us a DVD player for our car so we could make the drive easier. (SIL had bought a car with a DVD player and get boasting about how she didn't even have to stop during the car ride anymore - just play DVD's for her daughter). I absolutely refuse to have a tv in our car, ever. If we drive cross country someday, maybe I'll bring a laptop computer. But 4 hours, give me a break. Kids need to learn to entertain themselves, be quiet with their thoughts, enjoy the scenery, talk with their parents and siblings, and plus, stopping at interesting new places along the way is half the fun, IMO.


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## nikirj (Oct 1, 2002)

Maybe I'm different because...

1 - my grandpa's lake is essentially deserted besides himself and just a couple other elderly-but-very-tolerant residents

2 - nobody has ever tried to make us stay out after the kids stopped being interested, because they recognize that bored kids on a boat is a bad idea

4 - we are a family of lifeguards and competitive swimmers

5 - everyone is very safety-conscious and wouldn't dream of going out without vests, checking the boat, checking weather conditions, etc for themselves, much less for the kids (who are vested properly every time, and held on a lap anytime the boat is in motion)

If your family does most of these things (with the possible exception of #4 so long as you can swim reasonably well and can see at least two people on the boat being capable of swimming to shore while pulling weight), I think that you should go ahead and do the boating thing. Take all the precautions you can, of course! (No boating without vests, no speeding - but it is a pontoon, we have a speedboat - no kids running around while the boat is in motion - no fishing supplies on board with the kids on board - give other boats a large margin.) I don't know about your kids, but mine greatly enjoyed boat rides even at a very young age (as long as they were short) because they liked the motion, feeling the air, watching the shore, etc (and there is a lot of wildlife where we were).

Personally, we are safety junkies. All nonswimming adults and any children aren't even allowed at the dock without vests (the water is only 4"-4' deep there). Fishing supplies get stored in a locked portion of the cabin. And just forget hunting supplies - I've never even SEEN where my up-north relatives keep those (with the exception of my uncle, who keeps them DISMANTLED in seperate locked cases in the cabinet, basement, and garage). But we still boat with the kids. The two ideas aren't totally incompatable, you know. They do have fun, too - keeping them entertained isn't the problem.

I think a child can live for a 2 hour drive without the brain-mush, huh? We plan to get one when we move to the mainland, though, to get us through a 6-hour trip we'll be taking several times a year. We figure it can't kill the kids and it will certainly not hurt us (but then, we also allow movies here at home pretty frequently - so if we allow them at home, what is the big deal about them in the car when we are asking so much of our kids in terms of sitting still?). My DH is adamantly against just running music or movies in the car, though - he spent long stretches in the car as a child and tells me that the quiet time is largely responsible for who he is, since it allowed him so much reflection and contemplation, and just general time to think quietly.


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## wombat (Nov 3, 2002)

Well, just aside from the safety issues, how much fun will it be for you to have 2 children that age on a boat? I mean, doesn't sound very restful or relaxing when you'll have to watch their every move and can't take your eyes off them for a second.

I am totally paranoid about small boats and water. My 12 yo brother drowned in a kayak accident. Even though he could swim, it was a river and he got entangled in tree roots near the edge of the river. My girlfriend's 2 yo niece drowned when her parents were tent camping near a river and the 2 yo awoke before the parents and somehow got out of the tent.

I suppose you can do things to make a boating trip safe but if you're not comfortable, then where's the fun.


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## Scout (Jan 23, 2002)

Well, I have a totally different outlook! We love boating! We practically live on the lake in the summer. We have taken our toddler on a few different kinds of boats, and I actually *love* the pontoon. I see it as a living room on water, not a playpen. My son is just mesmerized on the water; it calms him. We bring snacks or lunch or dinner, watch sea gulls and other boaters, drop anchor and swim (child in life vest, naturally), use floaty toys, listen to music... it's especially nice when it's so hot and humid. A great way to spend an afternoon. (Not that we're even close to hot and humid here right now -- it's snowing!! Grrr.....)

Your kids may really enjoy the experience, and I would suggest keeping your mind open and let them figure it out for themselves. They may not like it at all, which is fine, but I have never met a single kid who doesn't like to ride on a boat or swim.

As with anything, there are risks. Take every safety precaution you can -- life jackets, no alcohol, good driver. IMO, it's no riskier than driving on the highway. But it's a heck of a lot more fun.

Good luck. I hope you can find a solution that works for all of you.

~Scout


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## Zaxmama (Mar 2, 2004)

I feel your pain ,we have friends that have a boat and a baby and are always "buggin"us to go out on the lakes..
and now here is where I get on my soapbox.

My kid. my choice. if I am uncomfortable with the idea (ok paranoid and scared but so what! ) then the answer is NO.
I don't care if the whole world has on a life jacket,is a certified life guard and has not even had a sniff of alcohol...I am not willing to risk it.

so it all boils down to what you decide to do. not to be rude but "screw em" you gotta follow your gut.
as for the tv in the car...whatever happened to the liscense plate game..or for the lil ones...the "animal" and what sounds they make games.. HAHA! can you tell I grew up in pennsylvania we have cows on every block!


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