# When will this hell end?



## Satori (Jan 30, 2003)

I had to go back to the ER again for another labor repeat and they refused to transfer me to a hospital that could do a D&C and just gave me a Vicadin and 3 shots of Demerol to dull the pain and told me to see my OB first thing in the morning. Praying I'll be able to drive! Right now I'm doped all to heck and still in pain







Tomorrow I'm demanding a D&C at my OB's.

ps: I was screaming so loud I was scaring the elderly patients and the nurse was telling me to quite down because of it. If they had bothered to do something about my pain I wouldn't have been screaming! I have NEVER had pain like this and I've been hemorrhaging. I was soaking a heavy duty overnight pad every 15 minutes and not once did any one check on me







Thank god its slowed down but I wish the cramping would go away.


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## Birth Junky (Jun 14, 2004)

Mama, I hurt for you . . . wish I could offer more than online support.


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## Breathless Wonder (Jan 25, 2004)

Satori, I am so sorry. I hope tomorrow brings you some physical relief.


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## AdoptChina (Dec 7, 2003)

I'm so sorry. I hope the OB can help you end the physical pain tomorrow...you should not have to be dealing with that


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## QueenOfTheMeadow (Mar 25, 2005)

I'm so sorry that you are going through this. My thoughts are with you and I hope your physical pain will be over soon.


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## Satori (Jan 30, 2003)

Thanks everyone







Its 6am, drugs have worn off and the pain is GONE, at the moment anyway







I still cant believe the amount of pain I was in and those idiots never checked my bleeding. I had some left over Sheppard's purse at home and took that as soon as I got home and man that stuff is powerful. Stopped the hemorrhaging pretty fast







I set the alarm clock to wake me up every 2 hours to make sure the bleeding didn't return and take my Vicadin and so far so good and very little soreness. Anyway, I need to hit the shower and pick up my car at the hospital and get my buns down to the OB's office. Praying this will all be over today!


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## Satori (Jan 30, 2003)

Went to the OB, she refused to do a D&C because she saw no fetal parts left in my uterus but I dont see how she could because its filled up with more huge blood clots! It it really that freakin hard for them to suck out the dam things?! Waiting for the next labor to start









ps: she said take 2 Aleve, that should take care of the pain, yeah right! Feel like i'm being cut open with a hot knife and 2 Aleve is going to solve it...


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## Icequeen_in_ak (Mar 6, 2004)

((hugs))

Your miscarriage sounds very similar to the one I had right before I conceived my daughter.

I was in a remote camp, 600 miles from home working and had to be medivac'd out because the pain was so intense (it was much worse than my labor) and the bleeding was so excessive.

My OB also refused to do a D&C. His opinion is that they are far too barbaric (sp?) and can sometimes cause more harm than good. I thought he was crazy as a loon, but the bleeding slowed down and the pain subsided a day later. Hopefully, you are on the same path and your pain is over.

I'm so sorry for your loss mama


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## atozmama (May 2, 2005)

Satori, I am so sorry for your loss.







Losing a baby is hard enough let alone going through all you are. That is a lot of blood to be loosing, is there another hospital or OB you can see? I hemmoraged with a miscarrage at 12 weeks. The ER did an US and could not find any baby. I was taken to an D&C a couple of hours later and a baby was there.


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## shannon0218 (Oct 10, 2003)

How are you now Satori?


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## Satori (Jan 30, 2003)

Still bleeding with that nasty putrid smell, still having strong contrax off an on but I have a script for naproxen which seems to be keeping me out of pain. I'm just wondering how long this is going to last.


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## Artisan (Aug 24, 2002)

Oh, I am so so sorry, mama.


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## savannah smiles (May 4, 2004)

So sorry you're going through this!


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## JLav (Mar 11, 2003)

I hope that you start feeling better soon. I've been thinking about you and how you are doing. Are you still feeling okay today? I really can't imagine an OB refusing to do a D&C when your uterus is completely full of clots. What a frustrating experience during an already difficult time. I am so sorry you are having to deal with this. Losing a baby is hard enough without all the extra crap to deal with.
I found that laying in the bath helped with my cramps. I like to turn the lights off and burn a couple candles. Make yourself a pot of tea or have a glass of wine and relax.
I wish there was more I could do to help you right now...I hope you get relief soon.


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## Satori (Jan 30, 2003)

oh god, here we go again


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## QueenOfTheMeadow (Mar 25, 2005)

Satori,
Hang in there. I hope this is over for you soon.


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## Satori (Jan 30, 2003)

me too, last night wasn't to bad meaning I didn't feel like screaming but I did have to breathe through a number of them. I'm a little PO'd though, I actually had some what of a plan! I figured that as soon as I dilated enough that the clots started coming out I would try pushing like hell as well as external uterine massage to try and get clots out then once I felt like they were out I planned on taking Sheppard's purse to stop bleeding ASAP and keep taking it for a bit in hopes it would prevent more clots from forming, (no bleeding, no clots to form from it line of thought) and guess what happened last night? The nausea starts hitting which going by the past 3 experiences means its going to end in about 2 hours. I consider this the transition point because its a lot like real transition, contrax are one on top of another, nausea, shaking, breaking out in sweats, hot and cold chills, get that "I can't take this anymore!" feeling. Well, transition started but as soon as the first clot passed I still felt in control and not in really severe pain (I had taken Naproxen, Vicadin and Tylenol ES) and was trying some of the pressure points I read about for pain control in labor in Peggy's preg book which seemed to actually be helping. Anyway, I tried the pushing/massaging thing and what happens? My cervix closes up tight! So that plan failed







I didn't feel it close but all the bleeding stopped and the contrax majorly backed off. So today I'm stuck with a really sore uterus and finding I need 2 heating pads when I only have 1 for my sore back and my sore uterus and I still cant figure out why the







my crotch hurts! Its ached every time after this labor crap. So today I'll probably spend most of the time in bed with Mr. heating pad resting and drinking hot tea which seems to be helping but I woke up in a lot of pain so I'm going to be sucking down vicadin all day again and praying I have enough to get me though the day because like an idiot I didn't feel like dragging dd into the pharmacy yesterday to pick it up.


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## AngelBee (Sep 8, 2004)




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## Birth Junky (Jun 14, 2004)




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## Breathless Wonder (Jan 25, 2004)

Satori- Is there another doctor that you can see? I'm really concerned about you, and really concerned that this has been going on for so long.


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## pamamidwife (May 7, 2003)

Satori, did you get to see another doctor? Are you still bleeding alot? Masking any pain could be dangerous - I would really encourage you to see another doctor if you are still dealing with this.


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## Destinye (Aug 27, 2003)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *pamamidwife*
Satori, did you get to see another doctor? Are you still bleeding alot? Masking any pain could be dangerous - I would really encourage you to see another doctor if you are still dealing with this.

I definitely agree, and hope you can get a second opinion today, but also wanted to add that the homeopathic remedy Sabina helped me when I had a nasty m/c at 14 weeks a couple of years ago, it finally stopped the bleeding. However I would work with your doctor on this or maybe find an ND who can help you. Hope you feel better soon, and sorry for your loss.


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## Satori (Jan 30, 2003)

The bleeding isn't bad anymore and all I pass are huge clots and stuff, its when those







labors hit that I'm really downing the vicadin because I feel like I've been used as a punching bag for about 2 days after. I just called and left another msg. I've been to 3 different hospitals and all 3 have just looked at my labs and say no sign of infection and your not anemic so just wait it out and send me home. 1 did a pelvic the first time when I was rushed in an ambulance to the ER but my cervix was closed tight and they said it was over and to go home. (that was labor #2) At this point I think I'm more concerned over the fact that the stuff coming out smells like a







outhouse and I don't mean one that's new! I've asked every Dr about it and they seem to ignore it. My only other option for care is a place I avoid like the plague due to bad experiences there. I'm really frustrated over this, I've had several m/c and all have been over in 24 hours, this has gone on for nearly 2 weeks!


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## Satori (Jan 30, 2003)

I broke down and called the hospital I avoid and there booked solid until July and I'm welcome to call back then. If it cant wait then I can go to the ER. Great, so I can see another person who doesn't really know a darn thing about OB care and just looks at my labs and says your fine, go home and rest.


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## 1Plus2 (Mar 13, 2003)

X


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## mamabutterfly (Jun 23, 2002)

(((((((( Satori )))))))))








Oh, honey, that sounds so horrible, I can't even imagine!!







Is there anyone who can come help take care of you? Or a midwife or doula in the area you can call for support or comfort measures or just to talk? Or to get help w/your daughter? Just seems like you sholdn't have to go thru this alone.

I hope it's over very soon.


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## Satori (Jan 30, 2003)

Thanks everyone







Today was actually a good day! This morning wasn't to great due to soreness but this afternoon I felt fine with no meds and my stomach shrunk back to almost normal all of the sudden. The bleeding has almost stopped even though I'm still passing large rubbery clots. The odor has changed to (sorry if TMI) what a normal AF smells like so I'm hoping this signals the end of things







But I'm really PO'd at my OB though, I called and left a msg with the nurse about the hell I've been though and it needs to stop and the Dr got an attitude with me about how I wasn't "going though labor" and it "cant be that bad". I was trying my best not to rip her a new one!







oh and get this, she finally offered to do a D&C after 2 weeks of hell (she acted all offended when she offered and like I was just being a baby about this, I dont think she got that I didn't care about the bleeding, it was the friggin PAIN!). I told her I was feeling much better today but if we have one more repeat performance I will have it done. I liked her while I was prego but man, her bedside mannor for loss sucks!







I have one more check up with her and AFTER I get all my test results to try to find out why I keep m/c i'm going to tell her how I feel about it too!


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## Tupelo Honey (Mar 24, 2004)

Satori, I'm so sorry you've had to go through this. I had no idea until I saw this thread! I lost my first baby at 14 weeks, and it was very physically traumatic like this. I was seeing MW and planning a HB and resisted going to the hospital. But apparently the ripping sensation I felt when my water broke was an abruption that was also bleeding, because after several hours of contrax and profuse bleeding, dh found me passed out in the bathroom and took me to the ER. I thought I did not need or want a D&C, and one really rude doc said "Well, you are going to get an infection and probably die, then." But then another nice doctor came and talked to me about why he thought I should have it done, and reassured me about the pain I was afraid it would cause me, and I had it done. It was hellish, and thankfully after all the blood loss, the anasthesia knocked me out (it wasn't supposed to, and not before I got to enjoy being strapped spread eagle to a table totally naked until the nice doctor again came to my rescue by walking in and yelling aat everyone in the room for not covering me up), and when I woke up it was totally finished. Not more bleeding or anything. In retrospect I was glad I'd had the procedure. I'm just so shocked that your OB did not want to do it! I would think she'd be afraid you'd get TSS and sue her!

I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to make this all about me but just wanted to let you know I know what you've been going through, and I'm pissed that your doctor did not take better care of you!


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## Satori (Jan 30, 2003)

I just wanted to think everyone for there support







I ended up needing a D&C today when I went in for my check up and they found tons of retained tissue (this was after 4 weeks of bleeding) so hopefully its over now.


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## shannon0218 (Oct 10, 2003)

My God Satori, I just can't believe what you've been through with this







You must be so tired and drained, especially with a 5 yr old at home. I really don't know how I'd have coped with my hardest miscarriage with a child already at home--and it was a cake walk compared to what you have endured.
I'm glad they finally did the d&c and hope this will start you on a speedier road to recovery-both physically and emotionally--it's so hard to even begin to deal with the emotions when the physical is so very pressing.
May your physical problems now be over. I will keep thinking of you and sending healing vibes-if there is anything I can do, please pm me.


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## nichole (Feb 9, 2004)

satori

there is no excuse for the way you were treated. i'm glad it is over for you pretty much. i know how you feel. i can relate to what you and Tupelo honey went through. as much as all of us try to avoid the hospital and surgery, i know how relieved you may be feeling.

good luck to you


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## Tupelo Honey (Mar 24, 2004)

That is so outrageous that it took them so long to take care of you. I'm glad you finally are going to be able to heal and put this behind you.


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