# How Many of Your Toddlers Have a 7:30 Bedtime?



## Annikate (Aug 2, 2005)

I ask this question because I've been reading so much lately about this number. On one thread someone mentioned Elizabeth Pantley's new no cry book for toddlers & how she says this is a 'natural' time for toddlers to go to sleep. Then others have written in with similar success stories and they all seem to have bedtimes that are relatively *early*. (For us anyway!) LOL! Our *early* bedtime is 9:30!

I haven't read Pantley's new book but I think I should. Just wondering . . . if you've switched your toddler's bed time to and earlier time (around 7-7:30) did it work for you too?


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## octobermom (Aug 31, 2005)

My DD has a 7:30 bedtime (sometimes 8pm if she took a long nap) it made all the diffrence in the world. She went from having trouble falling asleep waking multiple times and up very early. We at one time weren't getting her to sleep untill after midnight even tough we stated like 9pm shes be up (cosleeping or not) at least 5 or more times during the night often just because she wanted to play, ans she'd be up for the day around 5 or 6am..
Now she practically puts her self to bed, after dinner we get her bathed dressed we read books do teeth, she can then play untill bedtime.. I ussually let her watch one earlier recorded show ussually a 15 mintue program like charlie and lola or little bear or fanklin but just one of the stories before she goes up it kinda signals the end.. Once her bedtime comes we just say okay time to go upstairs get your babies. Cecilia gathers up all her dolls and stuffed animals that have wondered down stairs and she heads up stairs, she drops her loot on her bed and runs into our bed :LOL WE go.. OH MY do WE really believe your going to sleep HERE?? DD spends about 4 seconds pretending to sleep then giggles jumps off and runs out she the goes to the steps takes like one or two steps down and waits for me.
OH NOOOO where do you think your going!







You leave me nooo choice I'll just have to throw you into your bed.. I (or DH) graps her ups and swings her one...two.. two and a half..two and three quarters.. (we do it a bit diffrent each night).. THREE and PLOP shes on her bed :LOL
She then gets under the covers holds out her hand I come tell her that I love her and I sing her a lulabye and kiss her good night and tuck her friends all around her, one final kiss and I leave. We ussually here her singing to her doll for a minute and then shes out cold..

Deanna


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## mamaGjr (Jul 30, 2004)

Ha ha ha !

We have not set that kind of standard in our household , if that works for you then GREAT!

We are all over the place scheduling wise ( don't really use day care except for grandmother and aunt one per week each ) dp and I both work (i am pt but in school as well) one of us is usually working til 11 pm or midnight a few times a week so the bed time schedule depends on who is the primary care taker that night!..
i tend to be more on a normal schedule but dp will take a nap with ds after work (when i am at work ) from 6pm till 8pm sometimes - it can be frustrating but ds seems to do fine with it as it has been this way since he was about 4 months old .
sorry for the lack of advice . i just needed to share


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## InochiZo (Aug 17, 2004)

We have the 7:00 or 7:30 pm bed time. Mainly because I am a working mom, I have to get up early and DS seems to naturally be an early riser like mom. I still think he is over tired sometimes at bed time. He still fights bedtime a bit it is relatively smooth.


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## Jade2561 (Jun 12, 2005)

At 7:30 we are still outside!!! The problem I have with a 7:30 bedtime is that the waketime is super early. A 10 hour sleeper will wake up at like 5:30 in the morning!!! I do not (and will not) function that early. We all go to bed at 10 and wake up around 9 the next morning. We don't have nighttime struggles because dd just sleeps when she is tired. So what if Elizabeth Pantley says the natural time for toddlers to got to bed is 7:30 - it sounds unnatural to wake up before 7! :LOL


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## famousmockngbrd (Feb 7, 2003)

When DS was a toddler, he took an afternoon nap from 1 PM to 3 or 4 PM, and went to bed around 9 or 9:30. He is almost 3 now, and gave up naps about 9 months ago... he goes to bed around 7:30, 8. His rising time has stayed pretty consistent, usually 7 or 8 AM.


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## KyleAnn (May 24, 2004)

hmmmm....my ds has always had a 9:30-ish bedtime and it has always worked wonderful for him. He began sleeping thru the night very early on as an infant, we never had any problems with him going down for naps, etc.
The very few times that we tried to put him to bed earlier for whatever reasons (?), it threw him for a loop-he would then wakr during the night, he would wake up very early, then be tires an hour later, end up skipping an afternoon nap, etc. Now, bear in mind, we didn't do it consistently enough to say it didn't/wouldn't work out, but we had no reason to take him off of his regular schedule, so we stopped trying.
If your toddler has a regular bedtime or schedule of sorts and is doing fine with it, sleeping well, getting plenty of rest-why mess with a good thing? One particular thing doesn't work for every one, kwim?
Now if you feel like your dc isn't getting one of those things as much as they should, then definitely try to seek out something that works for you....

...that's just me. I can't tell you how many times I've had people wrinkle their nose at me when I tell them how "late" ds's bedtime is...so what do I know?


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## joesmom (Nov 19, 2001)

I don't think Joe EVER went to bed at 7:30!







He averages about 11:00 now & sleeps till ten. It works for us!

ETA: Joe is *not* a toddler, but this has been our routine since he was one.







Hope that counts!


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## octobermom (Aug 31, 2005)

Quote:

the problem I have with a 7:30 bedtime is that the waketime is super early.
For us we found the opposite true, the latter she goes to bed the earlier she wakes up, she ussually wakes between 7-8:30 DH ussually gets her up dressed and breakfast








We say 7:30 and I really do work with that time but were also not obsessed with the clock.. during the summer when its like 120 outside in the afternoons the evenings are when we take her out so a few evening a week were at the park from like 6:00-6:30ish till about 7:30ish, also I wont like grab her up from playing a game or something I don't want someone doing that to me I wont to my dd..
Tonight I think we got her upstairs about 7:40 DH no biggie and DH played with her a bit in bed so it was probably about 7:50 before she was actually in bed.

Quote:

If your toddler has a regular bedtime or schedule of sorts and is doing fine with it, sleeping well, getting plenty of rest-why mess with a good thing? One particular thing doesn't work for every one, kwim?
Oh totally agree







matteer of fact we did great with bedtime being around 9-10pm for a long time when it stopped working we changed it, its simpily what works for us. I'll often suggest an earlier bedtime for those who ARE struggling but even then its just that. What I hate is the idea a child MUST be in bed at a certain time bo matter what..

Deanna


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## hipumpkins (Jul 25, 2003)

DD is close to 3 and hasn't napped for just under a year. She sleeps 12 hours so if she goes to bed at 7/;30 than she is up at 7:30. I try for 7:30 but it can go anywhere from 7:30 to 9 depending on the day. I like 7:30 for my sanity b/c I am sooo ready for her to be asleep by then b/c DH works 2 jobs and is rarely home so I am wiped out at the end of the day. When DH is home she can stay up later...she sleeps 12 hours no matter what.


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## twindaze (Aug 13, 2002)

My 16 month old goes to bed anywhere between 8 PM and 10 PM depending on how his nap went. Some nights he'll be up later if he took a second nap. He's always been an erratic sleeper.


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## Heffernhyphen (May 3, 2005)

We start the bedtime wind-down around 8:00 or 8:30, but he rarely sleeps before 9. While I would enjoy an extra hour or so alone with my husband (or a book, or the TV, or MDC) at night, I have to think he'd just make up the difference by waking us up earlier in the morning. And THAT is not an option.


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## Llyra (Jan 16, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *octobermom*
For us we found the opposite true, the latter she goes to bed the earlier she wakes up

I found that, too. It's like the way I used to try and keep her from napping too much when she was really small, in the hopes that she'd be tired and sleep better at night. It never worked; the more she slept during the day, the BETTER she slept at night. It's the same with bedtimes-- if she goes to sleep early, she actually sleeps longer.

We're not nuts about bedtime here. Julia mostly goes to bed sometime between 7 and 8:30 depending on the circumstances of the day. She sleeps until about 7:30 am most days, although I've known her to sleep as late as 9 or get up at 5:30. But mostly 7:30 to 7:30.

I like the early bedtime primarily because then DH and I get some time alone together. He has to get up at 5:30 and can't stay up real late so if Julia's not asleep by 8 we don't get any time alone together.


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## ShadowMom (Jun 25, 2004)

SEVEN THIRTY!!!! :LOL :LOL :LOL :LOL :LOL

Yeah, right!

My toddler is under the impression that his natural bedtime is around 9:30ish.

I'm curious about this Elizabeth Pantley idea - why does she believe 7:30 is a "natural" bedtime for toddlers, and what does she mean by that?

If my guy goes to sleep that early, unless he skipped his nap that day, he gets up at 9:30 or 10 and is up for a WHILE. Yikes!!!!

He goes to bed at around 9:30 or 10, and sleeps for about 10 hours, maybe a bit less. It would be great if he slept longer at night, but he's just slowly reduced the amount of sleep he needs at night over the last several months... I think he's just one of those toddlers who needs a bit less sleep.


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## johub (Feb 19, 2005)

My toddlers all have a bedtime of 7:30.
I have never read any sleep manuals so I dont knwo if or why this time is recommended.
But as for my children, they start to expire really quickly if they are not in bed by 7:30.
For a while we did 8 or later but the routine was much smoother and faster at 7:30.
(exceptoins still happen occasionally)
My 3 year old really doesnt fall asleep near 7:30 but I think it is daddy's fault because he cosleeps and daddy turns on the TV and stays with him and he thinks it is playtime. WHen I put him down I turn the lights down and lie on the bed and read to myself and he passes out quickly from sheer boredom.
Joline


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## Kira's mom (Nov 30, 2004)

7:30 is definately NOT dd's natural bedtime. If she skips a nap she'll go to bed around 8 or 8:30-otherwise it's around 10.She's always been a late sleeper and usually wakes up around 9:00 no matter what time she goes to sleep. i think every child has their own personal 'clock',just as every adult does.I've never been a morning person and either has dh so it works out great for us!


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## alegna (Jan 14, 2003)

7:30? I just don't get that. If she went to bed at 7:30 she'd never see Daddy. We've always had her on our hours- bedtime is somewhere between midnight and 1 most days. She wakes up between 9am and 10am. She has always been a super sleeper.

Wow- stopped to figure out- if I tried to make her go to bed at 7:30 and she slept the same amount- she'd be up at 4:30!!! no thanks.

-Angela


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## octobermom (Aug 31, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *alegna*
7:30? I just don't get that. If she went to bed at 7:30 she'd never see Daddy. We've always had her on our hours- bedtime is somewhere between midnight and 1 most days. She wakes up between 9am and 10am. She has always been a super sleeper.
-Angela

We battled the what about daddy time and I do think that if my DH worked a job where he consistantly came home say 6:00 then I'd really try to have more time than 1.5 hours. "unfortunally" hes eaither home quite early (around 2pm) or home quite late. Honestly I can't keep her up late she'd be fussing crying and would eventually colplase. She still takes a long nap each day.
I wouldn't blink if I went to someone elses home and the kids were up untill midnight or 1am







because I know diffrent strokes for diffrent folks type thing.. but at the same time I can't imangine having MY child up till midnight, it would be a disaster.

Quote:

Wow- stopped to figure out- if I tried to make her go to bed at 7:30 and she slept the same amount- she'd be up at 4:30!!! no thanks.
As many of us "earlier bedtimes"







have said our childrens sleep time actually increased when the bedtime was moved up. I'd be right with you if my DD was up a 4am. um NO THANKS! :LOL Like with my DD when she went to sleep around midnight she consistanly was up bewteen 4-6am and up multiple times during the night.. she was averaging 4 hours at night and then wasn't napping but would coplase where ever she was around 5pm sleep for like 45 mintues.. That just wasn't healthy and made everyone irritable. Once we found her nitch which for her seems to be between 7pm and 8pm she suddenly sleeping 12 hours ( wake time between 7am and 8am on average) rarly wakes during the night and naps during the day time about two hours.
Again not for everyone but understand for many of us it is the best..

Deanna


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## IncaMama (Jun 23, 2004)

you know, it's funny, but we JUST made the shift to 7:30-8ish for his bedtime. he'd been resisting sleep BIGtime when we'd try to get him down at 9 or 9:30 so we gave it a shot and OMG it worked! we had a late night the other day so it's been messed up since then, just a bit...but if i get him up into our bed at around 7:30 he's usually out by 8:00 or 8:30. and doesn't wake up until around 6:30 or so, which is fine with me. i woudn't mess with a good thing if you're happy with the way your bedtime routine is now, but if you're noticing it's getting harder for your dc to fall asleep, i would recommend at least giving the earlier bedtime a shot for a few days. it was a godsend to us! LOL


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## TiredX2 (Jan 7, 2002)

We tried that before and it was a GREAT BIG FAILURE with both our kids, lol.

They really do just need less sleep. Generally they just wouldn't fall asleep that early. If they did, they would be up and ready to go by 9pm (often earlier) and wouldn't be down for bed again until midnight, setting us up for them sleeping in late and then doing the same thing, but worse, the next day.

Now, that my kids are "older" they do the following:
DD (6.5) asleep 9:30-10, awake 6:30-7.
DS (4) asleep 9-9:30, awake 7-7:30.

DD gave up naps altogether (me fighting tooth an nail from 12 months on) completely by 21-22 months and DS by 23-24 months.


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## chersolly (Aug 29, 2004)

DD(18m) goes to bed around 7p - 7:30p and will sleep till about 6:30a - 7a. I'm usually awake by 6am, so I don't have a problem with her waking early. I'm not one for schedules, but she kind of developed this on her own and I'm just following her cues. Admitingly, I am kind of happy she likes to go to bed early because I get to read a little or watch TV.


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## polka hop (Dec 23, 2003)

*


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## ShadowMom (Jun 25, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *riotkrrn*
My DD's bedtime varies with the season.

You know... this is interesting. I wonder if my DS could be doing the same thing. A few weeks ago I was really frustrated with my DS because he could be up until 10, 11 o'clock most nights. I started kiboshing naps after 4 p.m. (I normally don't like messing with people's sleep, but it was driving me nuts), and he has started going to bed at around 9:15-9:30 pretty regularly.

I had attributed it to my nap kiboshing, but I wonder if maybe it's just because it's getting dark so much earlier here? It used to get dark well after 9, and now it's dark at probably 8:15, 8:30.

Interesting...


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## peypeymama (Jul 31, 2005)

Peyton goes to bed around 7 - 7:30 and wakes up about 7:15 in the morning. This summer we had her up a few times until 8:30 or 9:00 AND she still wakes at the same time.

The unfortunate part of her sleeping 12 hours at night is that her nap is usually 45 min - 1 hour 1/2... occaisonally she throw in a 2 hour nap if she's extra tired or growing.


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## ShadowMom (Jun 25, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *peypeymama*
Peyton goes to bed around 7 - 7:30 and wakes up about 7:15 in the morning. This summer we had her up a few times until 8:30 or 9:00 AND she still wakes at the same time.

The unfortunate part of her sleeping 12 hours at night is that her nap is usually 45 min - 1 hour 1/2... occaisonally she throw in a 2 hour nap if she's extra tired or growing.

It could be worse... my DS sleeps 10 hours at night and has a 1.5 hour nap... SOMETIMES it's 2 hours, but not usually. And, he always wakes up at least once during his nap and has to be nursed down.


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## mthomas (Mar 20, 2004)

DS goes to bed around 7-730. If he goes to bed later than that, he wakes up more during the night and wakes up earlier than usual. UGH. so, he goes to bed early. Honestly, I really really like it. I love my babies, and am glad I can stay at home w/them, but at the end of the night when everyone is in bed and I can sit down w/a book or watch the tube...it's pure heaven!

Quote:


Originally Posted by *KristiMetz*

I'm curious about this Elizabeth Pantley idea - why does she believe 7:30 is a "natural" bedtime for toddlers, and what does she mean by that?


I bet it has to do w/how our bodies secrete/regulate melatonin. I read an article or watched a show maybe abt teens. There's a shift in when our bodies start releasing melatonin to signal bedtime, it usually occurs in the early teen years. It's trying to find a medium btwn early childhood bedtime and later adult bedtimes. Unfortunatley thier bodies overshoot the "intended time" and doesnt begin relasing melatonin til around 11 or so. Explains why we stayed up til 2am in 9th grade, huh?
Seems like they also said that THE BEST SLEEP in your life you will ever have is around 8-9 yrs old.
So, maybe a toddler has an average melatonin secretion time of 730? *shrug*

did that make sense? I don't feel like editing.


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## Neldavi (Jun 28, 2005)

Ds had a 7 or 7:30 bedtime for a while, still does sometimes. It seems to depend on when he takes a nap. The ideal situation (meaning what makes it easiest for him to fall asleep and not get overtired) is when his bedtime comes 8 hours after the start of his naptime. So ... 11:30 naptime, 7:30 bedtime ... 1:00 naptime, 9:00 bedtime .. but even then 9:00 can seem a bit late, 8:30 is probably more like it. He definitely does better with an earlier bedtime. He seems to be one of those kids who does actually need the "recommended" amount of sleep to be in a good mood.
I really like the early bedtime ..







I like having evening time to myself to just read a book or whatever (instead of doing chores) before I crash around 10.


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## *LoveBugMama* (Aug 2, 2003)

Noahs bedtime is usually around 7-7.30 pm.

He sleeps 12 hours, and is up between 7-8 am. I work at home, and have to be up by 7.30 am, and that usually wakes him up if he isn`t already awake. (We cosleep.) The nights when he goes to bed later, he still wakes up when I get ut.. And then he gest tired cause he hasn`t had enough sleep etc...

So for us the early bedtime works great.

But ofcourse, it isn`t like he NEVER goes to bed later than 7.30 pm.. During summer, when we are off work and when we have visitors he wants to be with, he will be up longer.


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## starlein26 (Apr 28, 2004)

ds used to go to bed that early...before he realized that we don't. we totally let him decide so it ranges between 8:30-10:30.


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## The4OfUs (May 23, 2005)

Count us in! We start our bedtime routine around 7:00, 7:10 pm or so, and he's asleep by about 7:30. As others have said about their DC, we've found the later DS goes to bed, the more restless his sleep is, and he actually wakes up earlier than if he falls asleep by 7:30. If he's asleep by 7:30 or so, he'll wake up some time between 6am and 6:30. If he doesn't fall asleep until 8:30 or 9pm for some reason (see below), he'll wake up before 5:30am...NO THANK YOU! 6am is perfect for us, as that coincides with the time I need to boot up my computer to start working, and DH is up to get ready to go to work. He starts out the night in his own bed, but wanders into our room at some point and sleeps the rest of the night with us







, so I would just as soon he wake up the same time as us so I don't have to be paranoid about him being downstairs while I'm working upstairs...

Just as important for my DS's sleep is I have found that I can't let him nap later than 2pm at all, not even to just 2:15, or he won't go to sleep until almost 8:30 or 9pm (and I mentioned above what happens then!). I know some people IRL think I'm nuts for being so particular about his nap time and bed time, but they don't have to deal with the aftermath of a super cranky toddler when he doesn't get enough sleep!! :LOL


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## sarathan (Jun 28, 2005)

Our 2-year old goes to bed around 8:00, but sometimes 7:30. He's been doing that since he was a newborn and it works for all of us. It gives dh and I some alone time in the evenings, which we looove. Often times ds will stay awake for an hour or so just playing in his room quietly before falling asleep, which is perfectly fine with us.


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## MovingMomma (Apr 28, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *michelemiller*
you know, it's funny, but we JUST made the shift to 7:30-8ish for his bedtime. he'd been resisting sleep BIGtime when we'd try to get him down at 9 or 9:30 so we gave it a shot and OMG it worked!









:
That is our experience, too! Except I'd been trying to put dd down at 8-8:30. She was fighting sleep for 1.5 hrs or more each night and it was driving me bananas! Now we start our bedtime routine around 7 & start the nursing to sleep between 7:30-8. The closer to 7:30 the better it goes!


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## Nanners (Nov 28, 2004)

My 15 month old ds has been going to bed around 7:30 for a few months now. Before that it was more like 6 or 6:30. He sleeps (well, is in bed, anyway







) for 10-12 hours every night. I've always been a morning person, so it works for me! If he's not in bed by 8:00 at the latest he absolutely falls apart.


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## Naiad (Jul 1, 2005)

Bedtime:

Tonight- 9:30, Yesterday 8:30, Day before Yesterday 10:00, Tomorrow ??:?? .

He is all over the map, though I can usually count on it being no later than 10:30pm. We've started to try for 7-7:30, but not much success; just a more tired me after trying to get him to bed for over an hour. I would love to have him asleep by 7:30, but if he naps (usually from 1 to 2:30 or 3pm) then he isn't real tired by then. He seems to need at least 6 hours in between nap and bedtime. And I don't want to give up those naps.... we both need them!


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## MilkOnDemand (Jan 7, 2005)

All three of my little ones go to bed at 7:30. It makes very pleasent children







All are up for the day by 7:00, which sucks on weekends!


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## sunnylady303 (Sep 17, 2004)

Hmmm...I was just about to post this same question. I just finished the new Pantley book too. I have a 22 month old who fights sleep like crazy and goes to sleep at 9:00 - 10:00. So I thought I would try it. But it just seems difficult. To do 7:30 we'd have to start bedtime routine by 6:30 and usualy that's when we are just sitting down to eat. When do you eat dinner? I guess we will try it. Anything is better than bedtime battles!!


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## Llyra (Jan 16, 2005)

Sunnylady, we eat at around 6. But my bedtime routine is shorter; only takes about a half hour. We eat, and then leave the dishes/mess/etc. Julia goes in the bath, and then to bed, where we read a bit, have some milkie, and then to sleep. After she's solidly asleep, DH and I go back and clean up after the dinner mess.

I think this also works for us because DH gets home pretty early. If he was just walking in the door at 6:30, I am not sure I'd be so excited to have Julia in bed an hour later.

I used to be pretty sceptical about this "natural bedtime" thing and think it was another concoction of the sleep-training "experts." Until I saw it work so well for my DD, who used to take more than 2 hours to fall asleep. I pushed bedtime back, and all of a sudden she's finding it much easier to get settled.

So for us, at least, it turned out to be true. But sleep cycles and patterns are very individual, aren't they? So it must vary a lot child to child.

The point about the shortening days is interesting to me; I hadn't thought of that. I wonder how our babies would sleep if we lived in a society without so much artificial nighttime light? Would a lot of our sleep "problems" magically disappear? I'm betting they would.


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## 2+twins (Apr 20, 2004)

Mine have an approx. 7:30pm bedtime. They do wake up early though (5:30 - 6:30). They (especially the almost 2yo) are definitely ready for bed by that time unless I overdo it on the naps.


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## mommaJ (May 3, 2005)

Yes, dd(2) gets in bed around 7:30 and is asleep by 8 or 8:30. Same is true for us, the earlier she goes down the better she sleeps. She wakes at the same time regardless of when she goes to bed, so better to have her sleep from 8pm-7am than 10pm-7am. KWIM?


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## The4OfUs (May 23, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *llrya*
Sunnylady, we eat at around 6. But my bedtime routine is shorter; only takes about a half hour. We eat, and then leave the dishes/mess/etc. Julia goes in the bath, and then to bed, where we read a bit, have some milkie, and then to sleep. After she's solidly asleep, DH and I go back and clean up after the dinner mess.

I think this also works for us because DH gets home pretty early. If he was just walking in the door at 6:30, I am not sure I'd be so excited to have Julia in bed an hour later.









:

We eat dinner by 6pm, too - and our bedtime routine is short, as well. Brush teeth (while the bath is filling), bath (less than 10 min), jammies (and a little low key play for a couple minutes), get into bed, story (just one story), last drink of water, it all takes about 20-30 minutes tops. We also leave the dishes to do until after he's asleep.

Maybe try to start shortening your bedtime routine a little each night until it gets to a better length of time? I decided we weren't going to do multiple stories, and built the "last drink" into the routine so as he gets older there won't be the "one more story/one more drink" ploy to stay up later - we'll see if that actually works or not, though... :LOL

HOWEVER, Here's what we did to work around the late dinnertime/early bedtime when DH had a 1-hour drive to and from work each day: DS and I would eat on our own by 6pm, I would have him bathed and in jammies by the time DH got home around 6:45, and then they would have about 30 minutes together of "guy time" before he had to go to bed. DH would then eat on his own while I put DS down to sleep...not an ideal situation, but we made the most of what we had to work with and DS's need for good sleep really dictated that this was the best way to go (and we maximized our weekend time as a family since we had, and still have weekday evenings while he sleeps to do stuff). Now that DH is home before 6pm, it's nice to work dinner and bedtime routine in all together as a family, but we still keep the bedtime routine short so we can play together more.

Good luck!


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## CaraboosMama (Mar 31, 2005)

Our DD (17 mths) goes to bed between 7 - 7:30 - but we also get up early - by 6 most days - so early bedtime & earlier in the day (usually 12 - 1 ish) nap is what happends naturally.

I think the rationale behind Elizabeth Pantley's early bed time recommendation is that if you wait until your child is too tired, it will actually be harder for them to wind down. Although I enjoyed reading No Cry Sleep Solution & found some parts helpful, sleep doesn't have a one size fits all solution. (and IIRC Pantley discusses this - somethings may work for you, others may not)

Adults don't all go to bed at the same time - why do we expect that children will?!


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## mariamaroo (Aug 15, 2004)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *sunnylady303*
Hmmm...I was just about to post this same question. I just finished the new Pantley book too. I have a 22 month old who fights sleep like crazy and goes to sleep at 9:00 - 10:00. So I thought I would try it. But it just seems difficult. To do 7:30 we'd have to start bedtime routine by 6:30 and usualy that's when we are just sitting down to eat. When do you eat dinner? I guess we will try it. Anything is better than bedtime battles!!

I just read the toddler N.C.S.S., and have been attempting to put it into practice, but I have the same questions as you, Sunnylady. However, I have noticed that dd (23 1/2 mos.) has recently started showing signs of sleepiness early, like 7 or 7:30, and tonight she nursed to sleep at that time, and I didn't interrupt it for bath, pajamas, etc. Now she's asleep in her clothes, and I'm worried she's going to wake up at 11pm raring to go.

I haven't figured out how to adjust the bedtime routine to fit between supper and a 7:30ish bedtime. As a single parent, I have to do it all, and I don't know how to get a bath and supper all done that early. We take baths together, and until now it has been the major part of our bedtime routine. I'd hate to give that up, but I don't see how to make it work before supper.... anyway, I'm heartened to see other people with the same questions. I hope dd sleeps well tonight!

Oh, and I have long been a believer of 'the more they sleep, the more they'll sleep', but it hasn't been working for us! She's definitely been staying up later and waking earlier on days she gets long naps, and the opposite. She had a very short nap today - woke up after only about half an hour and would not be soothed back to sleep - and she went to sleep at 7 tonight!

Any thoughts or advice would be welcome!


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## Annikate (Aug 2, 2005)

Thanks so much for all the replies!







That's a lot to think about.
I don't want to claim 'success' yet, but dd went to sleep at 7:30 tonight! (No nap today.) I had been wondering because she's always sleepy around 6:30-7:00 and then just like a light switch, she's wired again until *whenever*. Friday night was 11:30!
Maybe this will work and I will actually get some *hubby time*!


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## Kira's mom (Nov 30, 2004)

always seems when dd doesn't nap she goes to bed at 8 or 8:30.We always eat dinner together.If dh gets home late he definately wants to spend some time with dd.We're in no hurry to get dd to bed because we want to spend time as a family together.She wakes at 8-9:30 no matter what time she goes to sleep and we want to be together


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## Annikate (Aug 2, 2005)

Originally Posted by *miriamaroo*

Quote:

I just read the toddler N.C.S.S., and have been attempting to put it into practice, but I have the same questions as you, Sunnylady. However, I have noticed that dd (23 1/2 mos.) has recently started showing signs of sleepiness early, like 7 or 7:30, and tonight she nursed to sleep at that time, and I didn't interrupt it for bath, pajamas, etc. Now she's asleep in her clothes, and I'm worried she's going to wake up at 11pm raring to go.
Hey miriamoroo,
This is the 2nd night we've skipped a bath and put dd in bed with clothes on! I figure if it helps her sleep better, we'll find a way to bathe maybe before dinner (?)
Oh, and she slept through last night until 8:30 this morning!







(woke once around 9 but went right back to sleep)
Good luck!


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## octobermom (Aug 31, 2005)

We do all the prep for bed right after dinner..
Deanna


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## Sleepymama (Oct 9, 2003)

My toddler has a 6:30 bedtime in the winter and 7-7:30 in the summer (just too light outside!) But he also gets up obscenely early, like 6am or earlier. He naps for an hour or two usually, but not always. He also naps early in the day, around 11am or noon. There is NO WAY he could stay up until 9:30, and if he did I'd probably be in a straight jacket!

When he was taking 2-3 naps a day his bedtime was 8:00, and we did see a lot of improvement in his sleep when we moved the bedtime to 6:30, which coincided with dropping 1-2 naps (he was about 14-15 months old IIRC). He has always been a terrible sleeper though, still doesn't sleep 'through the night' at almost 3 y.o.


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## mariamaroo (Aug 15, 2004)

I fully believe in the idea that the more they sleep, the more they'll sleep, but my 2 yo doesn't seem to have read the same books as me! I don't know what to do in situations like yesterday:

She got up around 8, like normal, and I planned on getting her down for a nap around 1 or 1:30. We took a walk outside before lunch, for fresh air and exercise, then rode home in the car and she got very sleepy, but didn't sleep. I brought her in and nursed her, thinking she might fall asleep, but she didn't.

So we had a quick lunch, got cozy on the bed, read some books, and nursed. But she didn't go to sleep. I kept at it for over an hour, but she just wasn't having any of it. Eventually I gave up and we went grocery shopping, and finally she fell asleep, as we arrived at the grocery store. I didn't know what to do. It was after 3:30, and I was worried about letting her sleep too late, and also we had to shop. So I let her sleep til 4.

We did a pre-supper bath, as an experiment, and I tried to get her down around 8pm. But she got wound up and didn't sleep until around 9, by which point I was totally frustrated and impatient.


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## JennyClaire (Jun 5, 2005)

7:30?







:

Like mariamaroo I have tried scheduled naps and bedtimes, but 13-month-old DS NEVER has the same plan in mind. On days when I plan on putting him to bed early, he will resist an early nap, and take a long, late one (like right now). If I don't let him sleep, he will be a scary bear all afternoon. On most nights, DH is asleep before DS! I am hoping that as he gets bigger, and the afternoon nap disapears entirely, DS will go to bed around 8 or 8:30.

Until then, I have to say that I've just given up.







I'm a SAHM and as long as I can catch an hour to myself per day during naptime, I don't mind if DS is up with is in the evening.

One thing I'd like to work on is getting him to accept being put to bed







by Daddy. He still cries for me when we try this. Any suggestions?


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## OakBerry (May 24, 2005)

When ds was an infant, he had "wide awake" time until about midnight. I never bothered to even try before then, just wasn't worth it. I am a sahm, and dh gets home late, so it worked fine for us.
As he's gotten older, his bedtime has gotten progressively earlier. When he was 2 it was 9ish or 10ish, depending on his naps. Now that he's 3, and doesn't nap, he will literally fall asleep in the corner at 7:15pm. I never thought I'd see the day,lol. Now that he doesn preshool he is up early, takes and afternoon nap, and I get him in around 8:30. But without a nap, 7:30 is about as long as he can last.


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