# I know there are doctors that troll here for ammunition...



## ceriserenee (Sep 22, 2010)

I just want everyone else to know it also. I knew that another one of my ddc friends had doctors discussing her case and blaming her for the loss of her baby...and now there is a doctor blogging about my son as well. I knew that was a possibility when I shared my story, and there opinions don't change anything for me...I have already lost my baby, nothing they can say can bring him back or make it wprse. I just want everyone to know this happens, so if you don't want others talking about you story, share it sparingly or privately. Blessings to all ypu.


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## KristaDJ (May 30, 2009)

There are many that troll here but I didn't realize that doctors were doing it like that :-(. I'm so, so sorry. Thank you for making it known to other mamas that might be affected by it.


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## gozal (Nov 7, 2008)

Wow, this is really scary. How is it possible? I guess if the situation is very unique? If the post includes identifying details? Any information you could share that would illuminate the methods and motives of such a thing would be greatly appreciated (so that it can be prevented). This should be a safe place for parents to share information.

(I do not ever post identifying details, my name, location, etc.)

I'm deeply sorry to hear of your loss. How awful to have your pain compounded.


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## Megan73 (May 16, 2007)

I guess it would be too much to ask that they'd come here trying to learn how to support women grieving losses








I'm sorry for your loss, ceriserenee, and that someone is trying to use your story to score points.


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## Xerxella (Feb 6, 2008)

I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry for your loss and then to have your loss compounded by other insensitivity.

I guess I'm nieve (sp?), but why would anyone do that, unless it was a teaching point. Like the doc was discussing, I wish I had done this or I should have done that.


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## Cheshire (Dec 14, 2004)

I think she means docs that are against home birth (or birth centers/midwives) and use losses mentioned here to support their own theories.

Could you PM me the sites you are talking about? I'm curious to take a look. And, I'm curious how they would classify what happened at the hospital that resulted in my son's death.

I'm so deeply sorry for your loss.


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## stik (Dec 3, 2003)

Ceriserenee, I'm sorry for your loss too.

MDC is one of the largest parenting boards on the web, and it is completely public. Threads here are seen by people here, and they show up in google searches, leading more people to come here. Ceriserenee's advice is good not just for pregnancy and birth loss but for any sensitive information that you would prefer to keep private. Putting it on MDC is almost like putting on a billboard next to a busy highway. I think it's insensitive for doctors to take stories from MDC and write about them elsewhere. However, it seems that a number of doctors feel that writing about things posted here is like writing about things they read in the newspaper.


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## ceriserenee (Sep 22, 2010)

Yes, it is very public, more public than we remember sometimes. What was taken was my birth story, and I shared it publicly knowing that this was highly likely. They use the stories of loss found here to show that homebirth, birthing center births and natural births in general. are too dangerous and that Mothering is pushing these births and in turn, allowing mothers to let their babies die.

The doctor who is using my story is using it to say that since I was in a birthing center, I didn't have proper medical care, and allowed my baby to die. Others discuss them openly in forums and call the mothers murderers.

It is horrible that a mother should have to bury her baby and then find such filth online, but it happens.

I just want to make sure that people know before they post anything, that this happens.

Thank you for your thoughts and blessings.


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## yellowbutterfly (Feb 26, 2008)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *Megan73*
> 
> I guess it would be too much to ask that they'd come here trying to learn how to support women grieving losses
> 
> ...


I agree with Megan73. Why can't doctors use our stories to be more compassionate? It really hurts. Are doctors just that insecure and insulted that there are women that choose alternatives to hospitals. It reminds me of how upset public school officials can be if a woman chooses to homeschool.

I'm so sorry sharing your loss was rudely used against you like this, Ceriserene.


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## RoseRedHoofbeats (Feb 27, 2008)

Quote:


> Are doctors just that insecure and insulted that there are women that choose alternatives to hospitals. It reminds me of how upset public school officials can be if a woman chooses to homeschool.


Yes. They are. And yes, it is exactly the same.

The same kind of doctors who shove their whole hand up a woman's vagina so far and fast it tears her vaginal wall when she transfers from a homebirth. Or the ones who refuse to give any pain medication for stitching them up. The shitty ones we stay at home to avoid, basically.

It sucks you can't sue them for slander or libel. When my uncle was killed in a police altercation (that led to him being Tasered 25 times with electrical burns around his wrists, proving they Tasered him AFTER he was handcuffed) it was a real high profile news case and it was right around the time they first started putting comments on news articles online. I'm so sorry that it's happening to mothers because they posted here.

~Rose


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## cappuccinosmom (Dec 28, 2003)

There is a particularly nasty doctor who trolls MDC for stillbirths in order to support her belief that homebirthers are stupid, egotistical, and basically baby-killers.


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## RoseRedHoofbeats (Feb 27, 2008)

I assume you mean Dr. Amy? Fortunately no one takes her seriously anymore. She made an absolute fool of herself on the "Science and Sensibility" blog where she tried to skew a homebirth study in her favor and got her ass handed to her by fellow MDs and PhDs and researchers. HA! It was beautiful. I'll try and find the link.

~Rose


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## Mosaic (Jun 20, 2005)

FWIW, we made PABL semi-private years ago, like TAO so that you have to be logged in and have so many posts to view. Obviously that is not a perfect solution, but it does provide a small measure of protection.

I hate that there are people who do this.


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## springmum (Aug 30, 2008)

I'm curious how many posts one needs to view this forum? - I'm asking for a friend who may want to join to come to this forum (she has had many losses in the last 6-9 months)


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## theboysmama (Sep 21, 2005)

i find this horrific and also quite interesting that a dr would think that this is a good place to prove that out of hospital births are what are causing the still births. The stories here include still births that would have happened regardless of where they planned to birth. The stories also include many hospital births where the outcome was not good as well as some home births and birth center births where the outcome was not good. very rarely does anything point to the baby being saved by being somewhere else. Very frustrating. It seems if they truely wanted to do a "study" on it then they would need to compare a site like mothering to a more mainstream site. Mothering has more out of hospital births so there might be more losses from those areas as a mainstream site will probably have a similar percentage of losses but most in the hospital as that is where most of those posters birth.

I am so sorry for your loss and so sorry that dr's do something this terrible.

Thanks for informing us


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## KristaDJ (May 30, 2009)

I was told by an administrator that anyone who was a member could view the forum, regardless of post count... ? This was months ago when I contacted them about getting another baby loss mama into the board.


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## theboysmama (Sep 21, 2005)

krista,

that is my belief as well. There are other forums like spirituality where you have to have a certain number of posts. This one you just have to be a member and be signed in.


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## JourneytoPeace (Jun 21, 2011)

You just need a login to view this forum. As you can see, I only have two posts! Of course, this has it's advantages and disadvantages but these disgusting trolls will find a way to get what they want- no matter what the rules are. Besides, I think the trolls mostly get their "ammunition" from the Due Date Clubs and the birth stories posted there  Despicable that we aren't able to share our experiences without worrying about judgment from others.


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