# My first time here



## MommyBear (Dec 19, 2001)

I've never needed to come here before but I lost a baby yesterday. I don't know what is normal or what to expect. All I know is I am in pain (cramps) and generally in a ticked off mood.


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## Blu Razzberri (Sep 27, 2006)

I havn't any advice, just ....


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## Gracefulmom (Apr 25, 2002)

So sorry to hear of your loss.


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## babycatcher01 (Nov 28, 2005)

hang in there, sending lots of love.


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## fostermomcchr (Dec 13, 2006)

I am sorry about your loss, it is hard emotionally as well as a bit crampy/uncomfortable in general. This time of year is a particularly hard time to have a miscarriage. Get plenty of rest, and drink fluids, it will take about a week or so before you stop cramping-well, it was for me atleast. Prayers for you coming your way!


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## adamsfam07 (Sep 9, 2006)

I'm so very sorry for your loss








I lost my baby a little over a year ago so I know how you must be feeling. Just get plenty of rest and take care of yourself, the cramping only lasted 3-4 days for me. During my m/c I bled for 3days and could see clots of tissue, that was hard to see. I couldn't stop crying for weeks, every time a commercial or a program would come on that had a baby or a pregnant woman I just burst into tears. It does get easier though, it helped me to think that it must have happened for a reason. Just try to take it easy, I know that will be hard to do this time of year, but you need to take care of yourself before all other things now.


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## taradt (Jun 10, 2003)

My first loss was this time of year too, it made it so much harder with all the focus on family.

feel free to tell your story, we are good listenners

tara


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## MommyBear (Dec 19, 2001)

My story is really pretty short. I found out on the 14th that I was pg. I was in the ER and totally wasn't expecting to hear that. I had some spotting that weekend and had a beta drawn on Monday. It was 21,956 and they wanted me to come in again on Wednesday. The second time around it was down to 20,000. My doc's office didn't seem too worried, they just said to take it easy. Friday morning I passed a large-ish clot and started bleeding heavier. Still not enough to even make it to a pad, but bright red with little clots. I'm having another blood draw this Wednesday to see where I stand.

So far this has been a pretty crappy Christmas. Not only do I have this going on, but all three of my boys are sick. Nobody is having a good time. Well, MIL seems to be enjoying herself. I told her that this was my worst holiday season ever and she kept saying "It could be worse." I finally snapped and told her "It isn't every Christmas that a child of mine dies. If it could be worse, I don't want to think about it" and turned away. What did I expect from the woman who said "Well, you can always try for another." Because kids are just replaceable or something.


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## lolalapcat (Sep 7, 2006)

I'm so sorry you have lost this baby.

Hoping tomorrow is just a better for you.

Keri


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## dziejen (May 23, 2004)

I am so sorry for your loss







When I miscarried last month I found the sticky in this forum (exactly what to expect during a miscarriage, I think) to be very helpful. I am so sorry your MIL doesn't understand how truly sad you are. Take care of yourself, mama.


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## HoosierDiaperinMama (Sep 23, 2003)

Oh, Rachel.







I'm so sorry. I had no idea you were pg and I'm so sorry that you've lost the babe.







s My thoughts and prayers are with you through this difficult time.







s


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## StacieM (Oct 13, 2006)

Rachel - BIG







- I'm so sorry.

You have the same name as my one and only sister. I never needed to come to a board like this before either. You're right, it's not every Christmas that you lose a child and you have every right to feel whatever you're feeling. It's tough when other's say things that imply you shouldn't feel that way. I hope your boys feel better soon. Take care of yourself and I hope 2007 brings better things for us.


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## MommyBear (Dec 19, 2001)

Nobody told me it would hurt this bad. I've been having contractions for almost three hours now. Passed some huge clots and I'm bleeding heavily. I could go to the ER for pain management but I just don't think I could take that. So instead I'm sitting here alone, wishing I could just go to sleep and forget everything.


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## lolalapcat (Sep 7, 2006)

We should have told you to check out the sticky thread on 'what to expect when you are having a m/c'. I am sorry I didn't do that, it does help to know what could happen.

_*Please*_ call a doctor, nurse, midwife if you are still in pain and bleeding heavily. There is no reason to tough it out, and it is certainly possible to lose too much blood during a m/c.

It's a completely crappy thing to go through, physically, emotionally, hormonally. I'm sorry that you are going through this.

Please let us know how you are doing.

Keri


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## MommyBear (Dec 19, 2001)

I called the OB nurse and told her that it wasn't fair to use terms like "cramping" because that is nothing close to the labor I experienced. I told her that had I known what was going to happen, I likely wouldn't have had the panic attack I had and I could have dealt much better with things. She got bitchy with me saying "I told you to expect bad cramping and bleeding." I had to tell her like 4 times that cramping and labor are two different things. All I was asking is that she rethink how to word things so nobody else has to go through this.

She called in some Percocet for me, but I can't take it because I'm the only adult at home *and* my second son has a doctor appointment in an hour and a half because he can't hold down anything and has been this way for three days. My poor little man.

I just want to curl up and sleep until next year.


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## StacieM (Oct 13, 2006)

Rachel







I'm so sorry. I do know what you mean. I, too, had contractions, not just "cramping" - I also wouldn't mind sleeping until next year. I hope the New Year brings good things for all of us. Take care of yourself. What about some motriv? My dr prescribed motrin for me.


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## coralsmom (Apr 1, 2005)

i am so sorry for the loss of your baby. i am sorry your mil said such a careless comment to you. having a miscarriage is true misery. i still cannot believe that we are expected to have miscarriages on our own, our very own, meaning alone, in pain, it can be terrifying.
my cnm played down what to expect, also. i was driving in my car, and was having vibrating contractions and a pulsing migraine headache, and on and on, and all i could think was 'is this normal? is this what other woman have to do?' all i wanted to do was check out of my regular life for as long as my miscarriage took, and then some, to get my bearings back. i imagine doctors/midwives don't want to scare us, but an accurate description would be better than expecting period-like cramps that can be helped with a couple of ibuprofin...
i hope you can get some rest. have alot of water to replenish. do what you need to feel better physically. i am so sorry you have lost your baby.


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## k9sarchik (Nov 11, 2006)

I am so sorry for your loss also.









My Mother, MIL and GMIL also said and did some of the darndest things when I had my m/c.

I hope that you find a shoulder to cry on and some arms to hold you.
We are all also here.


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## JBEMom (Sep 8, 2006)

I'm so sorry


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## anubis (Oct 6, 2006)

MommyBear, I'm so, so sorry for your loss








And I'm sorry for the way your MIL treated you. Some people just seem to thrive on other people's misery.

I hope you all feel better soon


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## HoosierDiaperinMama (Sep 23, 2003)

Just checking up on you, Rachel.







s I am so sorry you were left alone to deal w/the pain. I'm glad that you confronted your OB. Think of how many women don't have the strength/courage to do that!







s


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