# Nude co-sleeping?



## Mamatolea

I sleep nude. I have for almost forever and I don't intend to stop anytime soon. I feel constricted wearing clothes and I don't sleep(unless I am at someone else's house and I sleep like crap!)

My DD is one now and I am pregnant again(might be a boy, might not, we shall see..) and we obviously practice co-sleeping.

So what does everyone think about my sleeping nude? Is it wrong to do that with the kids in the bed? If not, at what age does it become inappropriate? (if it is a boy, I would think probably like 5ish or whenever they start becoming uncomfortable with my nudity?)

I know some families who practice nudism in their own homes all the time, DH is always covered(at least underwear and a shirt), but I am most comfortable nude....

So? What does everyone think?


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## sapphire_chan

Well, with a baby you've gotta be topless.


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## verde

I think it's fine. I sleep nude in the summer. DH sleeps nude all year round.


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## lilkat

My parents didn't co-sleep with us, but we all walked around the house naked a lot. Around the time my sister (3 years older than me) got close to hitting puberty, we all started covering up more, especially my dad. And I remember taking baths with my mom until I was maybe 7 or 8, at which point I told her I'd rather bathe by myself. It wasn't a big deal. Of course, my DH thinks it's really weird that, for example, I happen to know that my father is circumcised...







His whole family is very uncomfortable with nudity...

So I'd say do whatever you're most comfortable with now, and then let the kids decide what they are comfortable with when they are older. Hopefully your comfort with your body will teach them to be happy, healthy and comfy in their own bodies!


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## alegna

I see no problem with it.

-Angela


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## Greenmama2AJ

I think its just fine.
My DH has issues with nudity (military family where you had to wear shirts at the table, no nudity in public etc) and he wouldn't be comfortable with it but thats his issue, not yours!


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## JillChristina

I used to sleep nude prior to having kids in bed with me. I think I may have continued to for a while after dd#1 was born. But once she started getting bigger and squirming all over the bed, I started wearing underwear for my protection! Otherwise I was fighting off toes in my rear or girl parts all night.














Now I sleep in underwear and a shirt because my arms get chilly at night. DH still sleeps nude but he keeps to himself WAAAAY over on the edge of the bed and hardly moves. I'm sure he'd cover up if it started to bother the girls or him.

Jill


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## Theoretica

Not that anyone wants to know, but DH and I both have the same opinions about sleeping with clothes on as you do....YUCK! We can't sleep at ALL like that, and if we try it drives us both batty (battier?? LOL)

We still co-sleep off and on w/our 6yo DD (almost 7) whenever she's in the mood, and she slept w/me 100% until about a year or two ago. I'm due in April w/kiddo #4 who will also co-sleep. My 14yo son co-slept w/me until he was about 7, I didn't wear clothes then either at night. It didn't occur to him that he cared as it had never been any different. Now of course he's extremely modest and we respect that 100%, but that's more of a teen thing. When he was younger he didn't care whatsoever. My 6yo DD showers w/DH all the time, it's their 'thing' and they have a blast at it. When she gets uncomfortable with the idea she's welcome to stop, they'll find something else to do together that's just as 'them time'







I think our society is terribly over sexuallized, and the naked body isn't that big of a deal to most families.

Hope that helps? I think it's more about the standard of comfort in your home. That'll carry over to the child's attitudes as well.

Bellevuemama


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## oceanbaby

I sleep in the nude, and dh often does as well. The only time I didn't is when I had nursing babies sleeping with me - I found having naked breasts just invited night wakings, so I slept with a t-shirt.

My oldest is 6.5yo, and has no problem yet with me being naked. He sleeps in his own bed, but will come in in the morning to cuddle.

However, I've warned dh that his days of me walking around the house naked in the morning will one day soon come to end, for at least the next 15 years!


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## MilkTrance

Since children are the helpless ones, I think it is up to them and their comfort level.

If they are comfortable with it, why not?

"Modesty" is subjective.

Personally, I do wear pants because (TMI), I often get kicked in not-so-nice places when I nurse at night. DH does not wear pants.


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## Saminvero

DH and I sleep nude. DS is one. I grew up with an openly nude family. I plan on doing the same. No taboos that way!


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## Kat_shoshin

I love sleeping nude... but now with my nursling, if I am exposed he wants to squeeze (more like pinch!) my boobs ALL NIGHT... and so now I wear a nursing bra when I would like the bar to be closed...

I also get kicked in the nether regions...

Sigh* I miss nude.

In an unrelated note, the 2.5 year old I babysit walked into my room when I was changing the other day (topless at the time) and I said "No hon, shut the door, I am getting dressed." and he said "Oh" and came in and shut the door behind him. Kid's don't get privacy let alone nudity for a long while.


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## *Aimee*

I think its fine as long as everyone is comfortable. I sleep nude as does DH and we co sleep. Well we did but mostly DS sleeps in his bed in our room. We're having another baby in a 2 months and will cosleep then. We walk around naked a lot and its never an issue. But I think people will just feel when its not right for them anymore.


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## Flower of Bliss

I slept nude until DD (now 18 months) started kicking/putting her toes in places they did not belong. Now I wear panties. DH generally sleeps nude too. Lately he's been wearing underwear and sometimes t-shirts, but I think that's just about warmth. We bathe together (DD and DH, DD and I, etc) without concern. We're pretty comfortable with nudity. In the summer after sleeping nude, DH and I will often get up and walk around nude for awhile until we shower and dress. I don't see a problem with this. Until DD becomes uncomfortable with it, I have no intention of changing.


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## Twwly

We sleep nude. I can't see this changing any time soon, but if someone starts getting uncomfortable we can make changes of course.


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## Fuamami

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MilkTrance* 
Personally, I do wear pants because (TMI), I often get kicked in not-so-nice places when I nurse at night. DH does not wear pants.

Yeah, I wear pants or underpants because I was sick of the little toes pulling out my pubic hair!


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## Mamatolea

So everyone feels the same way I do







I thought so, but just thought I would ask! LOL

On a side note, my midwife still showers occasionally with her DD(7yrs) and she told me at my last appointment that her daughter looked up at her the other day in the shower and asked if she could suck on her boobies! LMAO

I almost peed myself(which isn't hard to do being pregnant! LOL)


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## dillonandmarasmom

DH and I typically have on something, but our kids are almost always nude.


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## Theoretica

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Mamatolea* 
she told me at my last appointment that her daughter looked up at her the other day in the shower and asked if she could suck on her boobies! LMAO

Have to say that I'm 8mos preggo and 6yo DD asked if my boobs work again yet? I said soon they will, she says....great, then I can have milk again!

Sheesh LOLOLOL

Bellevuemama


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## cheygirl

We turn down the furnace at night, so DH and I sleep bottomless under the duvet, and DD is all bundled up in a sleeper & undershirt cuz she kicks off the covers. No big deal, though occasionally she points at DH's privates & makes enquiring noises and DH says, in an bored-amused voice, 'yes sweetie, that's my penis' before he covers up with the blanket.


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## Vancouver Mommy

My dd is 2yr and 8 months and we don't wear anything to bed. Or breakfast sometimes, to be honest.


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## aschmied

A friend of mine said, somwhere between admiringly and exasperated "Well, YOUR kids won't have any curiosity about what the other sex looks like!"

All to the good - why variations on the human body should be a mystery is a mystery to me. (remembering the time I got in trouble for playing "I'll show you mine if...")


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## nubianamy

Yep, another frequently nude family here. DH sleeps nude almost all the time and wanders around the house nude. I do it when I am warm enough! I am now sleeping nude more often because DD is mostly sleeping in her own bed (at the foot of our bed) and I don't have to worry about the nighttime snacking problem.







I still get toes in pubic hair though, so I often wear underwear to bed to guard against that!

DD is interested in vulvas and penises (and bums) but no more than any other body part, and I like that. She comments on DH's penis surprisingly infrequently. I would think it would be comment-worthy with it being at eye-level like that!









We are about to have a boy, but we don't anticipate any big changes about nudity around here.


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## sandygirl

we're nudists as far as inside the house goes - as soon as we hit the door, we strip lol.

Never bothered me as a kid - I doubt it will bother DD.


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## jessica_lizette

We sleep nude as well, but I wear panties now to avoid sharp little toenails in not-so-nice places.


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## Septagram

Yeah, I can't sleep with anything clinging to my botom half so I wear a long tee shirt to bed. I usually wear clothes, but that's just my comfort level. DS sleeps in nothing but a diaper and DH sleeps in nothing but boxers most nights.


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## ann_of_loxley

I guess you can say we practice nudism! lmao
My DS at the moment will not wear clothes at all unless we go outside as its freezing! (then he sees a bit of sense which is a relief on our part hehe)...
I hate wearing clothes! In fact...I have not worn clothes for a huge part of my life since I moved out of my home with my family and have lived on my own/with my DH! hehe

We also sleep in the nude - even DS (unless is really cold but we do have good central heating). Hes only two though.

With nudity -its like this. The body is nothing to be ashamed of and thats the message I want to give to my son and the best way to show this is to model it for him. We dont really bat an eyelid with nudity and tend to wear out clothes to protect us from the elements. 'Modesty' really doesnt come till a child is much older. And then it will be up to my DS to say 'you know I am not comfortable with this anymore' - only he can lead the way with that and then we can show respect in his desires. However, I think modestly is also partly learnt - so I dont see my son being uncomfortable with nudity for a long long time... and by then I really do think he will be sleeping in his own bed hehe!


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## jul511riv

sleeping naked? I dunno. I'm a bundle up and sleep kind of gal. I'm usually freezing, and don't understand how dh can sleep in boxers and nothing else. Does it bother me that he's in boxers with dd and ds in the bed? No way. But if he were totally naked, um, yea. What about erections? That would be something private to me (us) and I wouldn't feel okay having my children be part of that. It's not that I feel it's bad or have an issue explaining it, but that is something private between us, ykwim?

Of course, the kids do shower with us...and I have no qualms about that, though dh is a bit squeemish...he is more worried that dd will be more interested in his penis than she ever really is. Truth be told, she is WAAAY more interested in her little brothers penis than anything else. She BEGS to wash it when I'm giving him a bath. I guess it looks like a fun thing to wash! lol.

I explain to her that she washes her own vulva (with my help if necessary) and that when ds is old enough to wash his own penis he will do that too because those are private parts and ultimately the only person who is allowed to touch it is them and anyone that they give permission to.

When i was preganant with ds and was planning our homebirth, I wanted to prep dd. I showed her lots of pictures and talked with her alot and she still is pretty open about talking about vulvas and breasts and the whole bit, which is good, but as for MY genetalia or dh's, well that is just between us and very private, so unless everyone is showering...underwear should stay on to reinforce that sentiment.

Of course, this is what works for us and I have no problem whatsoever with others who feel differently, I just wanted to state that you can be open with your kids and open and honest about the human body but still not be okay with co-sleeping naked.


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## GooeyRN

They will tell you to cover up if they are uncomfy. I am a nude sleeper. DD is 28 months old and doesn't have a problem with my nudity. However, she will tell dh to put pants on. She is starting to develop some modesty now. She kicks dh out of the bathroom when she has to pee or poo. She only kicks me out if she has to poo.


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## Amys1st

We sleep nude or "in the buff" as dd1 has reported to several people. Now that she is approaching age 6, dh puts some shorts on before going into her room etc or dd2's room in the night or actaully if we know the girls are awake in the early morning he will put some boxers on. We also bought a bigger house mainly because we wanted a master bath for his privacy with two growing girls. Having a house full of females, he is outranked and needs some of his own space. Its hard enough sharing a bathroom with me!

Mainly we do that because we never know how a story can get jumbled if she tells someone- Daddy came into my room last night naked.....


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## Theoretica

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Amys1st* 
Mainly we do that because we never know how a story can get jumbled if she tells someone- Daddy came into my room last night naked.....

OMG I totally identify, I've always wondered about that. Glad we homeschool as that would be a VERY interesting conversation...ugh! DH doesn't wander the house naked unless we're home alone, but in our room he's a nudist most times. 6yoDD just walks in with no thoughts about it, she's never cared that much about his penis or anything else. I think she asked once when she was little why Daddy's special parts were so ugly







: but other than that it's not something she pays any attention to. As for the PP regarding erections, I'll have to ask DH what his thoughts are and share with you, as I don't have much to offer in that area. I know that it's never been an issue...there's not much sexual about having a kiddo thrashing around in bed w/you LOL!

Of course...we didn't mention the fart contests between DH and DD...that's enough to make you wanna rethink the whole co-sleeping idea entirely...ARGH!!!









LOL
Bellevuemama


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## Mamatolea

DH says he gets erections all the time and it isn't a big deal. He says, she isn't down there









LOL


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## jamiew

I don't think there's anything wrong with it. This country is so paranoid and Puritanical (still!) about nakedness with children around. It's no wonder kids grow up with such a skewed sense of nudity nowadays.

I NEVER saw a naked boy when I was growing up. It was "shameful" and all that.

I think it's good for kids to see their parents naked, it will make them more confident of their bodies later.

And if you have a hard time sleeping well wearing clothes, then by all means, sleep naked!


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## Maiasaura

i was wondering about that, too. i'm SO glad i found this thread, and that i'm not abnormal!!

BUT:
are any of you a single parent who sleeps naked with a naked child of the opposite sex?

just curious if your thoughts on that change with the dynamic. should it matter?

pamela


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## Danielle13

I sleep with underwear on because of the toes in the pubes thing.







DH sleeps naked. DD really likes the skin to skin contact with both of us so it works out. I'm sure DH gets erections but its never a problem with them bothering dd (though she is only 6 months) She doesn't crawl down around his penis in bed.

One time DH and DD were bathing together and DD reached out and grabbed his penis before anyone could do anything and dug her nails into it and pulled with all her might (all with a huge grin BTW). DH freaked out. Now he's a little more concerned with the nudity thing. But his dad walked around nakey in his house so he may be ok with it later.

In my house, nudity or skin showing ever was very "naughty".


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## mommyof3andcountin

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mercyn* 
i was wondering about that, too. i'm SO glad i found this thread, and that i'm not abnormal!!

BUT:
are any of you a single parent who sleeps naked with a naked child of the opposite sex?

just curious if your thoughts on that change with the dynamic. should it matter?

pamela


Kinda. Not a single parent, but DH will put DS in our bed when he gets up so it's just me and DS. I'm starting to get sick of it, as DS is a a very touchy kid (likes to lay all over me and rub my body.) I don't like him rubbing my behind or other places (he was rubbing my hairy armpits yesterday)

I think yes, it does matter, at least to me. I think I'd be more comftorablt with a 2yo girl in my bed than the boy. Unless she was rubbing me all over like he does. I don't mind if he lays next to me (or even on me) but keep your hands to yourself, KWIM? I'm trying to sleep, LOL.


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## wonderwahine

ds is 2.5yrs old, and i still sleep nude in bed with him...... i dont see a problem with it.

I'm not a single parent, but i do sleep alone in the bed with ds. Dh sleeps on the futon in the lounge.


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## Maiasaura

i think i was mostly asking because ds is 7 and though he mostly sleeps in his own bed now (except on weekends), we both sleep nakey. i have slept naked since i was like 16 and can't imagine trying to sleep clothed. i think he mostly sleeps nakey because he was copying me back when he was maybe two or three, and we were all the time cosleeping.

but some people can take that the wrong way, especially since he's 7 and tall for his age (he comes up to my shoulder; i'm only 5'1"). i don't think a thing about it. i think it's perfectly natural for a parent and child to cosleep, no matter what the family dynamic.
mostly when we are in bed together, i have the blankets bundled up between us anyway, cause he can still tend to grab for my boobs, or roll over and squish one







:

but i was just askin cause i've had people say stuff when ds was smaller-- i can't imagine what they'd say now. people are so weird. but i don't want to risk interference, kwim? that would STINK.
well, i wanted to say the other S word, but didn't know if it would be ok!

thanks!


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## rrs

Quote:


Originally Posted by *MilkTrance* 
Personally, I do wear pants because (TMI), I often get kicked in not-so-nice places when I nurse at night. DH does not wear pants.

I'm a nudie girl, have been since birth. I wasn't sure if the birth of my son would change this, but felt that I would "go with the flow."

He's 5 months old. I'm still nudie, but wearing something on bottom as he has gotten more active and longer, his feet always seem to find my groin area, and it's just not comfortable. I'm still naked a lot through out the day, and for our baths/showers together.


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## boigrrrlwonder

I have a one year old. I almost always sleep nude. DP sometimes sleeps nude. Unless someone feels uncomfortable, I anticipate it to stay this way.


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## hanno

Quote:


Originally Posted by *natensarah* 
Yeah, I wear pants or underpants because I was sick of the little toes pulling out my pubic hair!









I wear a skirt for this reason.


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## Hannahsmummy

We are nude co-sleepers as well.

My daughter is almost 5 and she strips off as soon as it's tucking in time. She starts in her own bed but moves into ours when we go to bed.
The three of us are nude in there together.


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## LoveChild421

Ds1 is 3 and ds2 is 2 months- dp and I are both usually naked at home unless we expect friends or family to drop by. I can't sleep with clothes on. I guess I'll start wearing clothes more regularly as the boys approach puberty just so that no awkwardness is felt on their part....but I want home to be somewhere that the kids know they can be naked anytime they want- you just have to wear clothes in public.


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## Ks Mama

I don't have even a tiny problem with it.


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## Mama Poot

This never became an issue for us because our boys were young when they transitioned to their own beds and rooms. They are 2.5 and 20 months now and they see us naked all the time though! We still take a bath with them sometimes, they see us naked getting ready in the morning, its never been a big deal really. In fact my non-nursing 2.5yo enjoys laying his head on my breasts-especially when he's upset. I've never felt there was anything inappropriate about toddlers seeing their parents nude. If they get older and say that they are uncomfortable, then we'll cover up. But if no one objects, we'll just carry on as usual. And about sleeping, I sleep nude as well and you can't pay me to wear clothing when I sleep!


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## mom4peace

I think it's great. My father was so modest when I was growing up I think it made my sister and I overly self-conscious of our bodies. I hope my family is comfy being nude together.


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## ~Katie~

I don't see a problem with it. DH has never been a nude sleeper, even when we first met. I've never really been one either. I hate the way it feels to sleep without clothes on, not sure what it is. I like to be really warm too. I have on occasion taken off my shirt and slept with just a bra though if he's nursing a lot.


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## akaisha

i haven't read all the replies yet, but i would say that your possible future son would only have an issue with your nudity if you or someone else makes it an issue. kids don't inherently tend to be put off by nudity or feel awkward around it, it's just that society teaches us to be ashamed of our bodies, among other things. and i mean, realistically, your daughter could just as quickly develop issues with mama being naked as your son, just because she's the same gender as you doesn't mean she'll be comfortable with it once she's old enough to understand what it is.

go with what is most comfortable for you, teach all your kids that there is nothing wrong with nudity and make an environment where they feel comfortable expressing their concerns to you, i think if you do all that you'll be fine. if naked works for you, then do it.


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## graceshappymum

DH and I are nude co-sleepers, DD (2.5) wears jammies becasue she is cool at night sometimes and also tends to kick off covers. I think that nudity is only an issue if you make it one.


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## Peony

We all sleep nude, we are just more comfortable that way. 5y old DD1 doesn't care about DH's penis, quite honestly I'm not even sure that she knows it exists.







It's always been there, she always seen it, and it's not a big deal, it doesn't even really register to her. I'm not a single parent but DH and DD1 do sleep in another together and then DD2 and I sleep together, we don't even bat an eye at this arrangement but I can see how it could raise eyebrows.


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## baileyann3

Quote:


Originally Posted by *JillChristina* 
I started wearing underwear for my protection! Otherwise I was fighting off toes in my rear or girl parts all night.

Jill


ditto over here! her feet are EVERYWHERE


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## Calm

I want to sleep nude but I freeze. I live in Australia, and most of the time it is doable but in the winter it just isn't warm enough for me, even though I live in the subtropics! Particularly cos I have to have the blanket no further than my waist or I lose DS under the blankets. He likes blankets on his head, oddly, but still. Through the winter just gone, I had my own blanket that I pulled up over me, but not over DS, but it wasn't warm enough. I wanted to sleep nude with him for full skin contact as this is best for development of children. The benefits from skin on skin contact doesn't end at six months suddenly or whatever. It is ongoing.

Other cultures have no issue with it, they hunt, bathe, sleep, eat, stoke the fire... whatnot... in the nude. Wish I was there. Must be warm where they are







. Mid amazon though... too many mosquitoes.

We all still go to the toilet with the door open... shower and bathe together, it isn't something we've thought much about really. We just don't panic when we don't have gear on. Society will teach my children to fear and loathe nakedness, we don't have to start that for them with subtle messages by hiding, covering or other behaviour that suggests something is shameful.

Anyway, yeah, what on earth could be wrong with it? Most molestation happens with clothes on, so maybe that makes clothing the problem, eh?


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## eurobin

I do not sleep nude (just a personal preference thing) but I have no issues with family nudity as long as everyone involved is ok with it. I've always been one to get completely naked and then have to wander around to find which laundry basket has clean jammies... or get out of the shower and realize my bathrobe is still upstairs, etc, and I'm totally fine with that. DD and I frequently take baths together. And I never shut the door when I use the bathroom unless we have company. DD sees her dad's penis and my dad's (her grandfather's) when they use the potty or shower and she barges in on them so penises are also not novel to her, at least no more than a cat's fur or tail. It's just something that some people have and some people don't. And she often wants to discuss how mommy has ney neys (nursing breasts), Gigi (my mom, a breast cancer survivor) has ney neys that are "broken" (my mom's term), and daddy has nipples but no ney neys. She tells me that she has nipples now until she gets bigger and then she'll have ney neys too. So yeah, she notices the differences but she doesn't care.

Anyways... I plan to continue with my nakedness unless she expresses a strong preference against it.


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## mamadelbosque

I sleep with panties on and thats it. BEFORE DS, I slept nakey... but little toes down there are just, well, wierd, uncomfortable and just... pokey!! But yes, otherwise I'm nakey, and have no intentions of changin anytime soon. DH sleeps with boxers on (I think he basicly always has, but thats him).

Nakedness was never overly discouraged around here, at least at home







I remeber running around and playing naked around our yard all the time when I was little. And baths with my brother (2 yrs older), cousins, friends, etc till I was probably 5 or 6, maybe older. We don't do much nakey time running around now, though I think thats mostly due to the fact that we live with my dad, and THAT might be slightly odd, IYKWIM??


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## orangefoot

We both sleep naked and I can't sleep wearing clothes - I rip them from tossing and turning! I converted dh to sleeping without boxers when I met him 9 years ago. Our boys are older, 15 and 11 and have always seen me naked. The girls are used to seeing their dad naked too and no-one is bothered.

My boys will still talk to me while I am dressing so they obviously aren't bothered. Letting boys see a non-airbrushed 'normal' woman is part of my job in raising thoughtful children.


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## Twinklefae

We aren't nude sleepers, but I don't see anything wrong with someone else doing it. (DH sleeps in boxers, a tshirt if it's cold. I wear the full flannel pj's, sleep bra, and knit socks in winter!)


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## MrsAprilMay

Quote:


Originally Posted by *Kat_shoshin* 
and so now I wear a nursing bra when I would like the bar to be closed...

LOL! That almost made me fall out of my chair.

I agree that it should be up to the kids. If everyone is comfortable with it, then why not?


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## eccomama

i grew up in eastern europe where we never made big deal of our bodies so I grew up with no qualms aobut my body and sexuality. bathing with children until almost 10 was pretty typical and i know its frowned upon. i guess ppl view it here as some perverted thing while it's just normal for me.

i mostly slept nude before dd and pretty much topless when i was nursing. my ex always wore boxers. after we split up I continued to sleep half to naked during the winter and naked during the summer. dd is a nudist even at 4.5. lol. she runs hot so prefers to sleep naked even during the summer.


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