# Amelia's Birth Story



## WaitingForKiddos (Nov 30, 2006)

x-posted in ddc

This is the email I sent out with Amelia's Birth Story,

Family and Friends,

I wanted to update everyone on how Kevin and I are doing and perhaps
shed some light on Amelia's birth.

I'm still healing well. My midwife will be seeing me in a few weeks
for a final visit. In the coming weeks I will be visiting a handful of experts, both in neonatal loss and maternal wellbeing. The prediction is that future pregnancies will be
unaffected and my grief will calm with time.

Amelia's birth is still not fully understood by any of our heathcare
team. Four ob/gyns, several midwives, a perinatiologist, and the
outside doctors brought in for consult have no answers as to why my
water broke or how I escaped physically intact. What we do know is
that I was diagnosed with a marginal placenta previa at 14 weeks into
my pregnancy. This condition is very common during the first trimester and it nearly always resolves itself as the uterus expands and the placenta moves upwards while attached to the uterus. In my case the placenta moved dangerously downwards, completly covering my cervix. This condition is called complete placenta previa. As events progressed this would be the major factor in possible outcomes for both Amelia and myself.

On Thursday, July 9th I woke up and my water broke. I wasn't sure what
had happened. My midwife and I decided to consult my obgyn. Kevin and I met him at his office at about 10am. Because pProm (preterm premature rupture of membranes) is so rare the obgyn sent me for an
ultrasound though he didn't think anything was wrong. At the
ultrasound we saw Amelia, moving around like always. All of her
measurmemts were right on track. However it was obvious to even our
untrained eyes that there was no fluid surrounding her. Typically
there are several pockets of fluid able to be measured at about 2-5 cm deep. Amelia had just two pockets, each less than .75 cm. Kevin and I both knew that this was very bad however we nievely thought "more fluid will develop" or "maybe they can add artificial fluid". We returned to the obgyn's office just as the they closed and were referred to one of the county's most popular perinatiologists the next morning. Again, another ultrasound, and again there was Amelia, moving around and healthy but without amniotic fluid around her. It was then that the
severity of the placenta previa was also seen. We were told what
Amelia's prognosis would be; Amelia would be born with lungs that did
not work and would never work. No amount of time stalling labor would
fix that. We were given three options; an immediate hysterotomy (different than a cesarian in that the incision would be vertical and cover the entire front of my uterus) which would leave me forever unable to birth out of a hospital or vaginally and also increasing the risk of complications both immeditally after the surgery and during future pregnancies), a d&e abortion (to be done at UCLA and in several days time) or to wait for Amelia to arrive at her own pace, hoping for a vaginal birth, until infection or bleeding developed to the point an emergency hysterotomy was needed. We were told to go home and choose.

Somehow I knew Amelia would come when she was ready. I napped, slowly going into labor, while Kevin watched over me. While waiting was what I wanted it carried with it the very real chance of me
bleeding out, loosing my uterus, and sepsis. My midwife and I kept in
constant contact and she followed my progress closely. As Kevin and I
laid in bed that afternoon I felt Amelia move for the last time. She
was still very much alive, I just couldn't feel her through the
contractons. Kevin listened to her steady and strong heartbeat on our
Doppler. We laid in bed with the Doppler pounding onto Kevin's chest and my hands on my belly felling her familiar taps and pokes. We both told our kiddo how much she was loved and wanted.

Into Friday afternoon I began to have regular contractions. Kevin and
I were timing them carefully. I knew that Amelia was making our choice
for us. It was time. I called our midwife and we met at the hospital.

It's at this point things get fuzzy for me. I've talked to Kevin, our
midwife, Cathy, and Wayne and the following is what I do remember
along with their accounts.

At the emergency room our midwife was amazing. She fielded the admission questions and we didn't have to wait to be seen. The doctor on call in the E.R. quickley ordered blood tests, yet another ultrasound and an I.V. was started. The last ultrasound was perhaps the hardest. Amelia was moving her hands, laying in a breech position, the previa was still complete and the placenta attached. No change. The E.R. doctor was very kind and told bus I would receive better care upstairs. So I was then taken up to labor and delivery.

I had a headache and was nauseous at this point and my contractions
were getting stronger yet less regular. The obgyn on call came in to talk to us. Our options were the same however there was one big
change. I had developed a major infection. Taking our time was no
longer an option. The obgyn felt that the hysterotomy was the best and
safest option. He said that he had never attended a vaginal delivery
with a complete previa. He said that none of the other obgyn's with
privileges at that hospital had attended such a birth either. It was
now well into the night. The new choices were to go into surgery
within minutes or wait until morning at which time I would be offered
drugs to speed up my labor and we would attempt a vaginal birth.
Again, I knew that Amelia would come in her own time. I knew she
wasn't going to make it but I also felt peace in allowing my body and
hers to work in accord with eachother. The risks were explained to Kevin and I. The hospital's bloodbank prepaired units of my blood, I was given two I.V. lines with antibiotics and we waited.

The next morning went by quickley for me. Kevin watched over me as I
napped and labored. Cathy and Wayne stayed with us. Our midwife came back and talked me through contractions. By that time there was a different obgyn on call. Unlike the last doctor, this doctor was visibly shaken and unsure of himself. He was not comfortable with attempting anything but an immediate hysterotomy. He stated that now
with the infection present and not lessening there was a chance that
my bleeding would become so severe that I could bleed out in a matter of minutes. He believed that even with surgery there was a chance of me loosing my uterus. I know that by this time most of you knew I was not doing well and a request for prayers and good thoughts was made. Perhaps it was because of this that I told Kevin that I still wanted to wait and that I wanted to let my body let go of Amelia the way I felt was right. Again, we waited.

Through the next 4-5 hours my labor progressed. Kevin at one side of me and my midwife at the other. Talking me through contractions and
supporting me into positions to get Amelia moved down. Suddenly it was time and little Amelia was born, breech no less ( not "allowed" by
this doctor.) She was placed on my chest and Kevin and I were able to
marvel at our perfect girl. Due to a prolapsed cord we knew she passed
while in the warm safety of my womb. We looked at her tiny hands, the Maynard's second toe longer than the first, and minature versions of my nose and ears. Amelia Maynard. Many pictures were taken, which gives me such peace now. Like any new baby she was passed to her family to hold. Born on july 12th at 2:20 am measuring 8 1/2 inches long and weighing 7 oz. Minutes later an intact placenta was delivered. There was no excessive bleeding.

Medically speaking, Amelia's birth is nearly impossible. "Nearly" only
because it did occur. The complete placenta previa, attached to my body with it's lifeline of thick viens, simply moved out of the way. The doctors seem to be content with accepting a closed case. My midwives and myself feel that it was an unnamed devine force that allowed the impossible to become possible. I thank you all for your prayers and thoughts. I believe my life and physical wellbeing were saved because of you.

I wanted to share Amelia's birth story with all of you because it is
what I would have done if the outcome was different. Because no matter what the future holds for Kevin and I, Amelia was our first baby and she is so loved and will be remembered and missed forever.


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## MI_Dawn (Jun 30, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *WaitingForKiddos* 
I wanted to share Amelia's birth story with all of you because it is
what I would have done if the outcome was different. Because no matter what the future holds for Kevin and I, Amelia was our first baby and she is so loved and will be remembered and missed forever.


What an amazing birth story... I'm so sorry you lost your little Amelia.


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## Amy&4girls (Oct 30, 2006)

I am so very sorry.


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## MovingMomma (Apr 28, 2004)

((((((Cindy))))))








Amelia


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## NullSet (Dec 19, 2004)

I'm so sorry.

Amelia







I love her name, so beautiful.


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## Peace+Hope (Jul 6, 2009)

*waitingforkiddos*, i am so sad for you and your husband, and your family. you are a good mommy to amelia, your sweet little girl.


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## jtrt (Feb 25, 2009)

Thank you for sharing your beautiful birth story. I am moved by the respect and loving consideration you gave Amelia at every opportunity. It is indeed miraculous that you were able to birth your precious girl given the complete previa. I am so sorry that your sweet baby is not with you. I wish you peace and comfort as you mourn and remember your precious firstborn, Amelia.

Amy


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## cheer mom (Mar 12, 2006)

what a beautiful birth story.


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## Jules09 (Feb 11, 2009)

Thank you for sharing your birth story. How amazing and strong you were. I'm so sorry.


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## KeyToMamasHeart (May 1, 2009)

mama, i'm sending love and hugs to you, your family, and your little Amelia tonight.
i am so, so very sorry you lost your little girl. i lost mine 4 months ago. i don't understand why this happens, i never will.
be good to yourself, and embrace your grief like a big warm blanket. i wish i could make you a tea and give you a huge hug.
xo


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## namaste_mom (Oct 21, 2005)

I'm so sorry for your loss








Amelia


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## hartfelt (Apr 7, 2009)

much love to you mama


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## bluewatergirl (Jul 26, 2007)

Cindy - I am so very sorry.















Amelia


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## calmom (Aug 11, 2002)

That was such a beautiful birth story. The trust you displayed in your baby and your body is very touching. I'm so sorry you lost your well-loved baby, Amelia.

This part of what you wrote really touched me and healed a tiny part of my OWN grief in losing my Matthew.

Quote:


Originally Posted by *WaitingForKiddos* 
x-posted in ddc

Due to a prolapsed cord we knew she passed
while in the warm safety of my womb. .

I have been holding a horrible image in my mind of Matthew's last moments, dying inside of me but THIS image is so healing to me. Yes, your womb was warm and safe and you so loved your baby. And so did I.


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## ladyjools (May 25, 2009)

your story somewhat similar to whats happened to us,
thanku for sharing it and im so sorry for your loss

Jools


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## colorclash (Jul 14, 2009)

I am so sorry for your loss. Your bravery, strength and trust in your own body are are truly inspiring and amazing. Doctors and hospital care would be much different if more were as strong as you were in that hard moment of your life.


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## Breathless Wonder (Jan 25, 2004)

I am so sorry.


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