# Getting sewn up wrong--is this really normal?



## Sasharna (Nov 19, 2008)

My first birth was overseen by a nurse midwife. I tore and she sewed me back together.

I have a couple of concerns about the way that this was done. I'm due with #2 in April and I guess I'm looking for some feedback to see whether I should bring up any of this with my OB this time around.

1) It hurt A LOT. I don't remember whether I was administered anything to help with the pain while she did the stitches, but if I was, it sure didn't work. For me this was the worst part of my labor experience. The midwife was irritated when I told her that it hurt and basically gave me the impression that I should shut up and deal with it. So I did. Is that normal?

2) She didn't put me back together correctly. Basically I tore in two places along my labia, so she had in front of her:

(Part A) (Part B) (Part C)

....rather than stitching Part A to Part B and Part B to Part C, she stitched Part A to C and left B hanging out by itself. After a year or two, Part B eventually pretty much shriveled up and died.

It was painful for about two years afterward, but eventually it stopped hurting physically. The permanent damage is more cosmetic than anything else. And emotional... I still feel a lot of negative emotions when I think about it. I don't know if I'm just being a big baby or if my feelings are justified.

I went in to complain a month after the birth (this was 3.5 years ago) and was told by a male doctor that "it's normal to miss parts" when sewing up a tear, because a woman is so swollen after labor. At the time I was dealing with a lot of stress in my personal life and didn't have the will to fight it. But I keep wondering... is this true? Is it really just _expected_ that we should be okay with being sewn back up with so little attention given to which of our parts belongs where? Is it really impossible for the person doing the stitches to see what she is doing, like I was told?


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## laohaire (Nov 2, 2005)

Yikes. I'm sorry to hear of this.

From what I understand, sewing up labial/perinial tears is a very specialized art. If you show up in the ER asking for a tear to be sutured, they will call the OB-on-call rather than just having whatever attending or resident doctor do it - who would be fine stitching up your head if you bonked it.

It sounds like you got sewed up badly, and you have every right to be angry about it.

I would definitely mention your concerns to your OB. If you tear again, maybe the previous injury can be improved (though I don't know if it can be totally fixed). Or maybe he can help you even if you don't tear again.

I had a homebirth with a DEM, and I went to the ER to get stitched up. Though the OB on call was an absolute UAV, he did a good job stitching me up. He did use a local anesthetic, and no, it did not hurt except for the very last stitch I could feel but it wasn't horrible (still mostly numb). Because the OB was a UAV I considered the idea that he might try to hurt me or stitch me badly, and I was ready to drive another 40 minutes to another hospital, but it seems he did a professional job. DTD hurt for about a year but was better than ever after it totally healed. I just share all that as a comparative experience. I'm so sorry you had one that turned out badly.

Your OB will probably grumble about midwives not being capable, but discuss it anyway; it's your labia and it should be put to right if at all possible.


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## mwherbs (Oct 24, 2004)

usually I have seen providers respond to moms- most don't want moms (anyone for that matter) in pain , sorry that she treated you that way--
as for putting parts together wrong- I can see how that can happen sometimes- for some tears we are drawing a picture on paper and discussing it before we stitch- tears are so many shapes and angles and then to make it worse is that often there are little bumps and tags and swellings, stretching and abrated areas. Tears or no, stitches or no most bottoms don't go exactly back to the way they were before birth, we really work to not end up with some strange tags or 3 corner tears just hanging but I have had it happen once or twice and I have also had some stitches dissolve too quickly, probably the worst tears I have had mom has also had some sort of long standing infection too which changes tissue strength and it changes how well stitches hold as well ( yeast and warts are the worst). Something else that distorts the tissue is all the softening in response to hormones- so instead of having something like a steak to sew up you have something more the texture of butter but with some drag and firmness that is hard to push a needle through easily. Tears can often start up at the hymenal ring- which is not uniform in any way and then spread forward from there - so in starting out you start with the furthest in point of the tearing and anchor then you advance your stitching until you get just near the deepest part - the deepest part of the tear needs to be brought together and then move up to the surface- how well you get those anchoring stitches in and the deeper parts makes a difference to your surface ---
I personally had 2 hospital births and 2 epis and they sewed those up wrong- totally miss matched uneven and over stitched painful for a very long time(years)
there is plastic surgery/ reconstructive surgery if you think that that would make a difference for you-- for myself I had a small tear that I chose not to have stitched with #3 although scar tissue was still there- and it healed fairly well- and with #4 our largest baby I didn't tear and the slow stretch when he was born ironed out all the old scar tissue- which was great and worked for me.
take care


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## lifeguard (May 12, 2008)

I had a 3rd degree tear. The stitching up was horrible but not from the pain. In fact my ob spent a good chunk of time freezing & preparing & I'm sure that helped in how well I have healed.


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