# Some post D&E questions



## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

I had a D&E yesterday (baby died five weeks ago







) and I have a few questions.

1. Is there a way to get surgical tape residue off my chest? It's annoyed the crap out of me, and just rubbing it isn't doing the trick and is irritating my skin.

2. The doctor said 6 weeks for sex. Is that really a hard and fast rule? I had a miscarriage/D&E with my first pregnancy, and I don't remember the 6 weeks thing. It was 11 years ago, though. I mean, it's not like I want to jump my husband tonight or maybe even next week, but 6 weeks seems like a long time for a not-labor.









3. The doctor also said to wait 3 months to get pregnant. Again, hard and fast rule? I miscarried at 13 weeks, and the baby died five weeks ago at seven weeks.

4. This may sound really strange, but do I have to go to the 6 week follow up visit? I didn't like this dude, he was assigned to me through the ER. I mean, I would go if I felt something was wrong, but if everything is OK, do I really need to?

Thanks, ladies.


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

One more.









Is there anything holistically that I can do to help my body recover. A friend here suggested iron supplements. Any other suggestions?


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## mysticmomma (Feb 8, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *annettemarie* 
I had a D&E yesterday (baby died five weeks ago







) and I have a few questions.

1. Is there a way to get surgical tape residue off my chest? It's annoyed the crap out of me, and just rubbing it isn't doing the trick and is irritating my skin.

*Alcohol swabs, or soapy q-tips.*

2. The doctor said 6 weeks for sex. Is that really a hard and fast rule? I had a miscarriage/D&E with my first pregnancy, and I don't remember the 6 weeks thing. It was 11 years ago, though. I mean, it's not like I want to jump my husband tonight or maybe even next week, but 6 weeks seems like a long time for a not-labor.









*I always encourage moms to resume intimacy when they feel like it. When your bleeding has stopped, your cramping is gone and you want to. For some women this is 2 weeks, for others it is 2 months.*

3. The doctor also said to wait 3 months to get pregnant. Again, hard and fast rule? I miscarried at 13 weeks, and the baby died five weeks ago at seven weeks.

*I don't think this is an evidence based recommendation. I will look into what I have and see. Some doctors rec 1 normal period first. Again, it's just a rec.*

4. This may sound really strange, but do I have to go to the 6 week follow up visit? I didn't like this dude, he was assigned to me through the ER. I mean, I would go if I felt something was wrong, but if everything is OK, do I really need to?

*I think it would be a good idea to have a follow up with someone. That said, I never went for any of my 6 miscarriages, even the 2 that ended surgically.*
*[/CENTER]*

Thanks, ladies.


Suppelements can be important right now. You are postpartum, even though you had an early loss.









I would reccommend EFA's, b vitamins and probably iron (floradix).


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

Thank you, Trisha. I really appreciate you taking the time to answer.


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## gorgorita (Feb 5, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *mysticmomma* 
Suppelements can be important right now. You are postpartum, even though you had an early loss.









I would reccommend EFA's, b vitamins and probably iron (floradix).

What is EFA?


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## moondiapers (Apr 14, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *gorgorita* 
What is EFA?

essential fatty acids


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## dinahx (Sep 17, 2005)

Red Rasberry Leaf tea and Nettle, you have still lost a lot of blood even if it was all at once, kwim? . . .


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

I may even have some of that here, thanks!

Another question: It's been about 23 hours. I'm doing OK, I've been up and about a tiny bit, took a shower. Mostly I am enjoying the quiet, watching TV, and reading fan fiction.







But when I've tried the steps or walked around a bit, my legs are shaking/trembling. Normal? Anything to be concerned about?


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## moondiapers (Apr 14, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *annettemarie* 
I may even have some of that here, thanks!

Another question: It's been about 23 hours. I'm doing OK, I've been up and about a tiny bit, took a shower. Mostly I am enjoying the quiet, watching TV, and reading fan fiction.







But when I've tried the steps or walked around a bit, my legs are shaking/trembling. Normal? Anything to be concerned about?

How much are you bleeding? Can you take some iron pills and drink some OJ?


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

I'm really not bleeding much at all. I don't have any iron in the house. I can get some tomorrow. I do have OJ.


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## moondiapers (Apr 14, 2002)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *annettemarie* 
I'm really not bleeding much at all. I don't have any iron in the house. I can get some tomorrow. I do have OJ.

It's either the blood loss or low blood sugar so I'd drink some OJ...and if you have anything to eat that has lots of iron in it, now's the time. Be gentle with yourself ok? I've had a lot of miscarriages (luckily no D&Cs) but they do take a lot out of you physically.


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

Thanks. I've been drinking McDonald's Sweet Tea (one of my youth group girls brought it over, which I thought was very sweet) but I can try the OJ.

Thanks for your kind words as well. It really means a lot. I'm feeling very delicate right now.


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## mysticmomma (Feb 8, 2005)

Probably from your fluid loss, not to mention the emotions you are going through. Are you in pain? What is your pulse?


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

No pain, and my pulse seems normal, although it goes up when I've done more.

Everyone seems to be knocking on my door today.


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

I wonder, would it be too weird to ask my PCP if she could do my six week check? I'd feel more comfortable because she's a woman.


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## mysticmomma (Feb 8, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *annettemarie* 
I wonder, would it be too weird to ask my PCP if she could do my six week check? I'd feel more comfortable because she's a woman.

I think it's totally reasonable to ask. Does she do normal well-woman care?


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

Yep. She wouldn't do first trimester stuff, which made me grumpy, but she does Paps and stuff like that. I'll call Monday. It feels good to have something I can (hopefully) take control of.


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## catballou24 (Mar 18, 2003)




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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

Another question. Sorry.







:

If I was under general anesthesia, was I intubated? My throat seems kind of weird today. It doesn't hurt or anything, it's just hard to find my voice.

I feel so stupid for not asking more questions. While I was in the holding area, there was some poor man there groaning in pain. He was an alcoholic who had gotten drunk, fallen and broken his arm, and was passed out for a day. I also know his first and last name and his daughter's married name. So much for HIPPA, right?







Anyway, he was groaning so loudly and it was so unnerving (I really felt awful for him, but it was just super hard to listen to when I was waiting for the D & E) that I just wanted them to knock me out and I didn't ask a lot of questions.


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## dinahx (Sep 17, 2005)

I can't tell you if you were intubated, but I can tell you that even if you had surgery through the ER, you can totally get your report. Call the hospital and ask. It will be useful to you! (((Hugs)))


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## mysticmomma (Feb 8, 2005)

Yes, general anesthesia requires intubation. twilight sedation doesn't.


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## savithny (Oct 23, 2005)

I'm very sorry for your loss.

I had a missed m/c with D&C (baby died at 10.5 weeks D&C at 13 weeks) a few years back.

From my reading, the 3 months is a little harsh and not hard and fast. However, the chances of miscarriage if you concieve immediately following a loss are *statistically* *somewhat* higher, and one of the things I read suggested waiting so that if you were to m/c again, you wouldn't feel self-blame.

FWIW, I charted immediately from my D&C, and my first luteal phase after my m/c was only 8 days long, which would have been a potential problem if I had conceived. So I did wait at least a month after my 2nd miscarriage (which was later, between DS and DD).

I don't see any reason not to call your PCP for your followup. I don't think the doctor who did my followup was the same one who did my D&C. It's much more comfortable to go to someone you're familiar with.

One last thing, an answer to a question you didnt' really ask. Be prepared for your hormones to crash out, and hard. If baby wasn't passing on its own, it is because your body hadn't figured out baby wasn't viable yet, probably because the placenta had begun to do its job and was hanging in there. You *may* get to go through all the postpartum hormone crash, without either a baby to be holding or nursing hormones to counteract it. It took a day or two for me. I remember the sensation of this wash of hormones and emotions hitting me (it correlated with the final drop in my BBT chart). Miscarriage is hard already; the hormones made it extra rough for a couple of days.

((((hugs)))


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## Jules09 (Feb 11, 2009)

I'm so sorry you lost your baby.







My doctor told me I didn't have to wait to get pregnant after my D&C.


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## SugareeMama (Oct 6, 2008)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *annettemarie* 
Another question. Sorry.







:

If I was under general anesthesia, was I intubated? My throat seems kind of weird today. It doesn't hurt or anything, it's just hard to find my voice.

I feel so stupid for not asking more questions. While I was in the holding area, there was some poor man there groaning in pain. He was an alcoholic who had gotten drunk, fallen and broken his arm, and was passed out for a day. I also know his first and last name and his daughter's married name. So much for HIPPA, right?







Anyway, he was groaning so loudly and it was so unnerving (I really felt awful for him, but it was just super hard to listen to when I was waiting for the D & E) that I just wanted them to knock me out and I didn't ask a lot of questions.


When I had my d/c in June I was put under General and had a tube..it was hard to swallow just that night, but it was fine the next day. ((hugs))

I drank alot of Mc'ds sweet tea too! It really helped me recover!


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## expatmommy (Nov 7, 2006)

After my stillbirth at 22w5d, I took B6, B12, Folic acid, Omega 3's, cal/mag in addition to my prenatal. I also took Symplex F on the recommendation of a midwife, to regulate my hormones & counteract PPD; I think it really helped. I drank a lot of RRL tea mixed with nettle & red clover.

Because of my own weird living overseas situation, I didn't have very good follow up with any doctors. I think if you have a doctor who you have an established relationship with then it would be wise to see her for follow up.

The midwife also gave the same advice about resuming sex. Do it when you feel okay to do it. I know dh & I craved intimacy when we were both so sad & grieving.








I'm really very sorry.


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## songtothemoon (Jun 3, 2009)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *savithny* 

One last thing, an answer to a question you didnt' really ask. Be prepared for your hormones to crash out, and hard. If baby wasn't passing on its own, it is because your body hadn't figured out baby wasn't viable yet, probably because the placenta had begun to do its job and was hanging in there. You *may* get to go through all the postpartum hormone crash, without either a baby to be holding or nursing hormones to counteract it. It took a day or two for me. I remember the sensation of this wash of hormones and emotions hitting me (it correlated with the final drop in my BBT chart). Miscarriage is hard already; the hormones made it extra rough for a couple of days.

((((hugs)))


Annette -- Just posted to your first thread...just a couple of thoughts.
The PP crash is not fun. I went through a lot of threads here on MDC and one of the best recommendations was for a high Omega 3 Fish Oil (Country Life Mood brand was rec'd). I read up on it and the higher concentration of O3 can really help w/ PPD. I started taking it when I couldn't stop crying all day -- when I felt that I'd accepted the loss but my hormones were completely whacked out. It has helped tremendously. Also B-complex and prenatal.

Could you see the O.B. you mentioned for your follow up (or is that the hospital O.B.?) Otherwise, your PCP ought to be able to do it...

Oh, cupcakes are also good for mood elevation...







:

Sending you healing and loving thoughts and prayers!


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

Thank you all so much. I have a friend coming to take me to lunch, so I am going to put together a list of things to pick up at the store (like pads, because I don't want to have to wash cloth pads for this, but in my post-surgury haze, or maybe because it's been so long since I've bought disposable pads, I accidentally bought pantyliners







).

When does the hormone crash typically happen? Last night was really, really rough. I've also been having trouble sleeping for more than a half-hour at a time. I took some Tylenol PM last night--it was all we had in the house-- but I'd be open to other sleep suggestions.

I feel so sad and empty and raw. I don't know if sending everyone away was a good idea or not. I'm glad no one is jumping on me and pestering me and it's nice and quiet, but I miss all my children and my husband. Especially my husband, I think. I just want to be loved and held, and I'm all alone.

I can't thank you all enough for helping me through this. I know most of you are here because of your own losses, and I appreciate you taking the time to help me through mine.


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## mysticmomma (Feb 8, 2005)

. This is so hard. The first few days are just nearly impossible to get through, especially when you've also had to physically deal with surgery/anesthesia. We are all holding you in our hearts. I would get some nyquil cough. It has no tylenol in it, so it's easier on your liver. Or you could call and ask for an rx of ambien CR. It works much better than regular ambien. A glass of wine or your favorite drink in the evening before bed if you don't have alcohol issues could also be helpful. Hang in there mama.


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## MFuglei (Nov 7, 2002)

I'm sorry you're going through all of this - and don't know anything about the D&E (I had a medically induced miscarriage last Wednesday). . . but I can tell you that the hormone crash for me has been utterly mind-blowing. I'm a mess in ways that I wasn't even close to after my natural m/c in March.

I've been trying to do a lot of journalling and limiting my social time because of it. Last night, since I wasn't taking painkillers, 2 beers helped me to sleep.

I've had a hard time with my husband around. We both seem inclined to physical intimacy at the moment, I'm sure to help cope, but neither of us are ready. This has put us in a strange position, really not sure what to do with each other. In a way I'm glad he's here, but in another way, I wouldn't mind hiding out by myself for a week, you know? The nice part about your situation is that you have some quiet down time now and will have him back soon.


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## savithny (Oct 23, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *annettemarie* 
When does the hormone crash typically happen? Last night was really, really rough. I've also been having trouble sleeping for more than a half-hour at a time. I took some Tylenol PM last night--it was all we had in the house-- but I'd be open to other sleep suggestions.

Gosh, its been awhile. I so vividly remember lying in bed - maybe the night after the day after the D&C? - and listening to DH snore and both the cats snore and getting this sudden surge of anger at them all for being so darned ...ASLEEP! When I wasn't sleeping, and I *couldn't* sleep. And I recognized it as a hormonally induced thing in a way that my sadness and grief wasn't (it was very similar to sensations I had in the short time I was on BCP).

It hit a little later that I would have thought - not the day of the D&C but at least a day or two later, and it was pretty bad for a few days. And then it subsided, leaving me with the sadness and grief, still.

I didn't have to be "on" for kids, because it was before Primo was born, so I think I just got up and tried to read, or watched crappy TV or something, rather than taking anything and trying to get to sleep.

And I know what you mean about feeling alone. I kept the TV on a lot -- we'd just moved and DH was working and I was unemployed. I seem to recall watching a lot of Jerry Springer in order to feel better about my own life!

It all did pass, in time, and scab over. But it was so hard in the moment. I'm sorry you have to go through it too -- it *stinks*


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## Vermillion (Mar 12, 2005)

You've gotten some really good suggestions so far. I totally agree with the supplement advice and I'd also suggest eating as well as you possibly can. I know it can be so hard though. I didn't want to eat anything at first, and then when I did manage to get my appetite up enough to bother with eating, I ate crappy fast food or some other junk. I gained weight, which was very depressing to be gaining weight with no baby, and the crappy food really aggravated my healing, especially emotionally.

on the surgical tape, try some oil. Olive, coconut, etc. Should be able to get the last bits of it off with that.

Sex- I was surprised at how soon I wanted to be with DH. I really needed to be close to him during that time. We abstained for the 2 weeks after delivery because I was bleeding a lot, then ended up needing a D&C for retained tissue. I stopped bleeding a couple of days after that and ended up having sex a few days later. I didn't wait anywhere near the 6 weeks that I was told to wait. 3 weeks after delivery but only about a week after surgery. I'll tell you, I was SUPER worried about infection after that. Totally not worth the extra stress. It turned out fine, but my advice would be to wait until you get the all clear, and that's only so you won't worry unnecessarily about the possibility of infection during a time that's already tough enough, you know?

hmm... I wish I had more to offer. Just do whatever you need to do to get through this. Looking back I can see things I should have done (eaten better, tried to be more positive and do more helpful things to get out of the funk sooner... it took me a loooong time) but hindsight is 20/20. Really it's all about just getting by, however you can. This is the hardest part, just hang in there and be patient with yourself.

I'm going to stop yapping now.







to you. You're in my thoughts.


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## Vermillion (Mar 12, 2005)

Just thought of something that's important... have you been warned that your milk may come in? I'm not entirely sure if it will at 13 weeks... But, just in case, be prepared for the possibility of that. It's a very intense thing to have your milk come in after a loss. It can be really tough.









ETA: Ok, I just saw in your sig you have a little one who may still be nursing so you may still have milk... In that case, just disregard that advice.


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

I'm actually still nursing my two-year-old, something I'm extremely grateful for. I think I've thought about 100 times "Oh, I am so glad I didn't wean him!"

I called the doctor on call, and he is calling in a script for me, so that's good.

I'm still really shaky, which is weird.

I'm glad I'm going out to lunch with a friend. I think getting off this bed will be a good thing. It's a lot like transition, in a way-- I just don't know what I want or how to get comfortable, I'm freaking out, and I just want it to all be over.

Thanks again, for everything.


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## Vermillion (Mar 12, 2005)

Quote:


Originally Posted by *annettemarie* 
I'm actually still nursing my two-year-old, something I'm extremely grateful for. I think I've thought about 100 times "Oh, I am so glad I didn't wean him!"

We cross posted there. That's good. I imagine nursing him must be comforting.

I hope you enjoy getting out today. Take it easy


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## songtothemoon (Jun 3, 2009)

Annette -- As other posters have mentioned, the hormone crash/fluctuations kicked in a couple of days after my D&C. However, it wasn't just weepiness, but insomnia (big time), anger, crazy mood swings...
I was on Vicodin, which spaced me out a bit, but didn't help me to sleep.
Ambien or Nyquil is a great idea.

Also, re: shakiness, it may be blood sugar. When I was pregnant, I needed to eat frequently to keep from crashing. After the D&C, the LAST thing I wanted to do (at first) was eat, but I think my body was used to the way I'd been eating, if that makes sense?
For example, one day I ate very little all day and felt shaky and very depressed. In the evening, I think DH made/brought dinner. As soon as I ate, I felt better physically and emotionally.
So, try to get food in at regular intervals (even if it is junky).

Big hugs!


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

Thanks.

I have another question (sorry!).

I don't know why, but my back, shoulders, upper arms are killing me. It's like the muscles are really sore, almost as if I've been working out on the machines at the gym, which I haven't. Could this have something to do with the procedure? Like, would they have strapped me down or something? I took some Tylenol but it's not really helping the soreness.

I have some Ambiem to take tonight. He only prescribed 7 tablets, no refills, which is good. I'm hoping for some good, solid sleep tonight before everyone gets back tomorrow.

You're right, I do feel better after eating. I've been holed up in the bedroom and I have a bag full of junk food I apparently picked up right after we left the hospital, but it's all crap. So I'm trying to eat some decent food.

My friend brought dinner and we had a really good visit. I'm looking forward to a good night's sleep and my family coming home tomorrow.


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## mysticmomma (Feb 8, 2005)

You probably weren't strapped down, as GA literally paralyzes you, hence the need for intubation. I remember being sore like that and I chalked it up to lack of sleep/tossing and turning.


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

The amibien worked really well. I hope I can sleep soon without it, though.

I called my family doc and she will see me for the six week checkup. Everything just feels so hard right now. I feel like I've done more hard things in the past 4 days than I have in my whole life. And it isn't like I have had an easy life. Sigh. It's going to pass, I guess. And my family comes back today, which is good.


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## songtothemoon (Jun 3, 2009)

I've been thinking about you, Annette -- great to hear you got a good night's sleep!
Also, glad eating helped and that your PCP will see you for follow up.
It really sucks, doesn't it -- everything feels hard/overwhelming.
I could not face shopping, cooking, even feeding our sweet doggie seemed like a big chore...
It gets better!!! I promise.
Hope your spending lots of quality time with your beautiful family!
Big hugs!!!!!


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## Aeress (Jan 25, 2005)

AnnetteMarie- I am so sorry! I know I ate a bunch of junk right after my miscarriages, it was part of my grieving process. I craved red meat, so I ate hamburgers. I think about a week after being in bed, watching movies and eating junk and I was ready to get out in public. I know I avoided the baby area of stores and was pretty emotional for 4-6 weeks.

My last miscarriage took months for me to really feel like myself- not sure why, but my period was weird, and I just felt off. Being with friends and my family was good, they kept me going when all I wanted to do was feel sad. I still felt sad, but not as much.


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