# 8 month old Son wakes at night to nurse constantly- need advice/help!



## norasmommy (Sep 27, 2007)

My son who is now 8 months old, has recently been waking what seems like constantly throughout the night to nurse (I believe just for comfort to fall back to sleep). A few months ago, he used to sleep much more soundly and for longer stretches, only waking 1-2 times to nurse in 7-8 hours of sleep. I know he is growing and still does not eat much other than breastmilk, although he is becoming increasingly interested in food. I am about 99% sure he is not waking out of hunger so often at night but more so to soothe himself back to sleep when he rouses at all. We have a family bed, which I love- I love to cuddle him and nurse him at night, but now he seems like wake every 30 mins-1 hour at night and cries until I nurse him. He will suck for a few minutes (sometimes actually drinking breastmilk, and sometimes not) and then fall back to sleep. He has never wanted a pacifier or taken any interest in a blankie or other type of comfort item, besides the breast.

My husband or his grandma can sometimes rock him to sleep in their arms, but he still prefers to nurse at night. I also have a daughter (just turned 4) who nursed until she was 2 and went through a phase like this, but she would take a pacifier so eventually that helped cut back on the night time nursing. I do not necessarily want to night wean him, but I would really like us all to have longer stretches of more restful sleep and for him to learn to soothe himself a bit better. I asked my Pediatrician about it and he recommended just cutting him off from nursing at night and patting him on the back when he cries to nurse, etc.

Does anyone have any tips or advice to help with this? I'm afraid he is becoming too dependent on nursing at night to soothe himself, to the point where the slightest movement or noise wakes him and he cannot get back to sleep without breastfeeding. Thanks so much for any info you might have....


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## poorlittlefish (Jul 20, 2008)

I have this same issue with my 7mo DD...I will be watching this thread closely!


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## Buzzer Beater (Mar 5, 2009)

Same thing here... I'd love to get more than 2 hours of sleep at a time.


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## asraidevin (Jul 30, 2010)

Oh me too. Except he's 9 months,. in the middle of the night i don't wake up enough, ijust give him a boob and go back to sleep. But I'd rather he not wake at all.


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## LaydieBugs (Apr 9, 2010)

Same here, also 8 months! He used to always give me at least two 3-hour blocks of sleep, and he'd wake up so quietly. I've not felt sleep deprived since the second month.

Now, he is waking every 1-1.5 hours, and he screams!

I'm about at the end of my rope, having had too many nights without interrupted sleep. I'm trying to figure out if more solids will help, but he's not very interested in them. The thought of one dose of formula before bed is very, very tempting. I never thought I would consider formula!


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## Asiago (Jul 1, 2009)

Nursing throughout the night is healthy and normal. A woman's prolactin level elevates in the wee hours, which means that milk supply is at it's most abundant (usually 1-5 am).

Are you able lie and nurse on your side?

From his comments, your pediatrician likely is unaware of weaning stress and the physiologic effects when it is carried out abruptly.


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## LaydieBugs (Apr 9, 2010)

I think this comment is absolutely correct ... but also might be lacking some sensitivity to what it does to momma, to have an extreme night-nurser. When people have zero REM sleep for several days, it has significant consequences.

My son, by the scale, is having a massive growth spurt ... I've not been able to sleep without interruption for more than 90 minutes, in many days. I've tried several dozen different things to troubleshoot in the past month, and I am completely positive he is waking because he is HUNGRY. Even he seems pissed that he is waking up.

And I do nurse on my side, we sleep together just the two of us. But even waking enough to help him latch is waking up.

I haven't yet found a suggestion I have not tried, and I'm getting stern medical advice to get some sleep, so it's down to looking up recipes for goat's milk formula, to give him at night, even just one night a week until this spurt is over. I'm tapped out.


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## soso-lynn (Dec 11, 2007)

Does he sleep during the day? The first thing is to nap with him until you are less tired. You can also try putting him to bed later if you usually have him sleep earlier than you. It's likely a short-term thing.


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## LaydieBugs (Apr 9, 2010)

I don't know about the other mommas, but my problem is never getting a block of sleep that is long enough to be restful ... so unfortunately, no number of daytime naps really solves the problem. Humans need REM sleep.


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## Asiago (Jul 1, 2009)

I'm sorry if that seemed insensitive. I know how hard sleep deprivation is having experienced it while my son was in a co-sleeper for about 8 weeks.The one time he slept a four hour chunk I actually ended up with a clogged milk duct since I was so engorged. So I truly am sympathetic having felt lik a zombie those early months. Once I moved him into the family bed life was much improved. At 15 months now I think he nurses on average every hour and a half.but I no longer have to wake up and get him out of the co-sleeper, my sleep disruption is now minimal. I wish the same for the OP (hopefully one day soon).


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## User101 (Mar 3, 2002)

Because this is a common issue, I am going to move this out to the main forum, as per the Breastfeeding Challenges guidelines. Let's please keep the focus here on successful breastfeeding, which is the purpose of this forum. Thanks, and feel free to PM me with any questions or concerns.


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## laneysprout (Aug 5, 2006)

I agree with the previous posts that it is absolutely developmentally appropriate at this age for them to be nursing throughout the night. And I also empathize with how frustrating that lack of sleep can be since I am right in the middle of it with my seven month old DS. My DH will sometimes try to take him and walk with him, wear him down in one of the carriers, etc., but ultimately he just needs to nurse more frequently right now. It's temporary, and co-sleeping helps, for sure, but after a few days or weeks in a row it gets pretty rough. I understand why the military uses sleep deprivation as a torture technique . Just wanted you to know you're not alone.


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## EmTheWife (May 28, 2010)

We had the same problem from 6-8 months, and ds is now almost 9 months, and it is much better. We finally realized (like 3 weeks ago) that we were waking our son with our own normal night noises as we slept (grunts, sighs, rolling over, etc.), so our solution was to put our son in his own crib a few feet from our bed. Yes, it broke up co-sleeping, and he still usually joins us after is 4 or 5 am feed, but suddenly we were all getting 3-4 hour blocks of sleep! We still nurse on demand day and night, and I was a little extra full the first few nights, but we feel it's been worth it, as a better rested mama is better able to care for the kiddo during the day, kwim?

BTW, ds is still exclusively bf (he likes to play with food, but next to nothing makes it in, yet), so I don't think encouraging solids will necessarily help the sleep issue

Whatever you decide to do, I hope you all sleep better soon!


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## Friday13th (Jun 13, 2006)

6-9 months was the WORST for sleep for DS1 but he came out if it crawling, pulling to stand and cruising. DS2 is right in the middle of it. And it's miserable.


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## D_McG (Jun 12, 2006)

Having my husband take over for the early part of the night was a game changer here. Both kids figured out that it was possible to wake up and not nurse and seemed to choose to wake up less often. I started some time after a year with my son (my first) and around 6 mos for my DD. It wasn't a big upheaval, just the part of the night that I was still awake.

If your child isn't waking then (and is instead only waking when you're lying next to them) then I'd see if sleeping separately helps.


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## SomethingAnonymous (Feb 13, 2010)

This is probably not encouraging at all.. but my 18 month old still wakes every couple hours to nurse throughout the night. The only thing I have found that helps is if I can get him to eat a big dinner.. but he is still not that into eating. As soon as you are comfortable starting solids with your baby, maybe you can try that? Mine has been like this his whole life, maybe some babies just get hungry more often than others.


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## norasmommy (Sep 27, 2007)

Thanks so much everyone for your thoughtful responses. I do think that most likely for now I am just going to continue nursing him on demand through the night. My DS is such a happy content baby during the day, that maybe I don't nurse him as frequently as I could (because he doesn't demand it), so I may try "stuffing him up" a bit more during the day to see if that helps at all. What I have found most difficult is that when I put him down to sleep "for the night" around 7:30-8, I will try to get up and get a few things done before going to sleep myself and I will hear him wake up 2-3 times at least (when I go to him and he wants to be nursed) before I go to bed a couple hours later. I guess my main concern was that he was getting enough restful sleep so that he could soothe himself a bit better rather than waking up so much that I would have to run upstairs and nurse him back to sleep. In a sense, I think I shouldn't complain, I have been so lucky that he is such a good nurser, and such a happy baby. I think you all know how hard it can be at times to wake up so frequently at night however.

As for our Pediatrician, in general we have been very happy with him and he has always been supportive about breastfeeding as well as delaying vaccines, etc. I do not think that he is not a huge advocate of the family bed, which probably influenced his response to my son's frequent night waking/nursing, but I think for now I will continue what I'm doing at least until he is a year old and eating more solids (I plan to breastfeed well beyond a year though!)

I did some research and I came across a good article by Dr. Jay Gordon(who is a big advocate for attachment parenting)- who basically seems to say that significantly changing sleep patterns before babies are at least 12 months old, is usually not a good idea. He did give some helpful advice for mommies like me (and you!) who do not want to wean our older babies but all need some longer chunks of restful sleep. Here is the article if anyone is interested: http://drjaygordon.com/attachment/sleeppattern.html

Anyway, it sounds like lots of other mammas are in the same boat as me, which in itself makes me feel lots better. I really appreciate all the wonderful responses. Thanks everyone and I would love to hear any other stories, tips, you might come across with regard to night time nursing. Even when I feel exhausted, I still absolutely love breastfeeding!


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## D_McG (Jun 12, 2006)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *norasmommy*
> What I have found most difficult is that when I put him down to sleep "for the night" around 7:30-8, I will try to get up and get a few things done before going to sleep myself and I will hear him wake up 2-3 times at least (when I go to him and he wants to be nursed) before I go to bed a couple hours later.


Yes - that was always the time that set the pace of the night with us. I wish I'd never read the advice to 'tank them up' during that period because all it did was start the pattern of the night where my kids thought the norm was to nurse every 45 minutes. Eliminating nursing during those few hours was a total game changer for both of them. Cut their night nursing down to maybe twice. Much more normal and managable! If for some reason I fed them during those hours we were back to the non stop stuff.


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## norasmommy (Sep 27, 2007)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *D_McG*
> 
> Quote:
> 
> ...


I would love for him to sleep more soundly for that short period, just from about 7:30 or 8 til around 10pm. Every mommy needs some "break" time once in a while and since I tend to nurse him on demand throughout the day, I am pretty much always with him without being able (or willing) to leave him for any length of time with another person, etc. Although I love it, if I had a couple of hours in the evening when he was sleeping to do whatever I wanted/needed to do, that would be great. How did you cut their nursing down and eliminate it during those few hours like you mentioned but still maintain the closeness and nursing a few times the rest of the night ?


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## D_McG (Jun 12, 2006)

Quote:


> Originally Posted by *norasmommy*
> 
> I would love for him to sleep more soundly for that short period, just from about 7:30 or 8 til around 10pm. Every mommy needs some "break" time once in a while and since I tend to nurse him on demand throughout the day, I am pretty much always with him without being able (or willing) to leave him for any length of time with another person, etc. Although I love it, if I had a couple of hours in the evening when he was sleeping to do whatever I wanted/needed to do, that would be great. How did you cut their nursing down and eliminate it during those few hours like you mentioned but still maintain the closeness and nursing a few times the rest of the night ?


Well they both slept with me so nursing for the rest of the night was easy. As for maintaining the closeness.. I just didn't think a few hours break was a threat to our relationship. I would send my husband in or even sometimes me if I had to but just no nursing. I also work some night (not overnight but until say 10:30) so she really just had to learn to deal. That's not to say she didn't cry but I've come to realize that crying is OK sometimes. I mean it's OK if she's upset. One of us was there with her. If I'm not there, I'm not there and once she adjusted it was just a better scene for us all.


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