Mama Renew: Exploring the Deeper Journey of Motherhood

by Sarah Juliusson of www.MamaRenew.ca – Find Mama Renew on Facebook & Twitter

I threw out my back a few weeks ago.  It seemed like such a harmless moment – lifting a small suitcase – and in an instant I was frozen.  Couldn’t bend, turn, barely even walk.   Hugged my now-very-worried parents goodbye at the airport, tried to make it look like not such a big deal, eased myself back into the car with a grimace and grunt, and gingerly drove back into the city in search of the closest friend with ice & homeopathics.

I was in town for 3 very busy days – I had meetings scheduled, activities planned – and instead found myself dreading the moment I would have to move.  I’m known for working a little too hard on these trips – not enough breaks for food, no exercise, limited sleep…  Sometimes, it seems, we need to be forced to take care of ourselves!

An early morning acupuncture session with the brilliant Brownyn Melville allowed me a dramatic increase in mobility and decrease in pain. The next day featured a very deep & productive massage from the talented hands of Erin O’Riordan, RMT.  A meeting with 8 loving friends & colleagues with Dancing Star Birth featured them laughing at me each time I tried to do something for myself, ordering me to SIT & let them care for me.  During setup for a community festival we were co-hosting I was ordered to hold the door open while the rest of the Birth Lounge members carried all the boxes (the agony of not being able to help was worse than the pain in my back!)

I so wanted to be better, and while I was significantly improved over the following days, it took a circle of wise women to make me stop trying to push through it & simply be vulnerable. Having worked with families for some 20 years encouraging parents to ask for & receive help, well, you’d think I’d be better at this by now.  The reality is we’re all finding our way.  We all need reminders, nudges & prods.  And sometimes we need a great big in-your-face challenge (hopefully yours doesn’t come in the form of a back injury) to help us slow down & learn the lessons all over again – the hard way.

by Sarah Juliusson of www.MamaRenew.ca – Find Mama Renew on Facebook & Twitter

This month’s featured working mamas are Madeleine Shaw and Suzanne Siemens, co-founders of Lunapads International.  They have valuable wisdom to share on life-work balance and getting creative as working mothers.

Madeleine is Mom to Gigi (5).  She describes herself as an entrepreneur, feminist, creative spirit, relationship builder, & gardener.  Suzanne is Mom to Aiden (7) and Garret (3). She describes herself as a bean counter with soul, crunchy mama, lactivist, and entrepreneur.  Based on these descriptions alone, I’m sure many of you would love to sit down for tea with these two…

You began as entrepreneurs, and then became mothers.  How was that transition for you?

Madeleine: In retrospect I think that there is a part of me that wonders what staying how full-time with Gigi might have been like – there really was no meaningful break for either of us between having babies and going back to work. As business owners we weren’t eligible for unemployment benefits, and from a business perspective we needed to be there, so it wasn’t like there was a ton of choice. That said, our work schedules are super-flexible, so we are fortunate in that.

Suzanne: It was probably a very seamless transition because Lunapads was already well established at that point, rather than the classic “Mompreneur” model of doing it the other way around. Because so many of our customers are Moms, hearing a baby gurgling in the background on a phone call kind of became a bonding point, rather than a source of frustration.  Including babies into the work mix just became a natural extension of the Lunapads’ culture and reflection of how women instinctively know how to help each other out. We feel incredibly lucky to have been able to share this unique version of “working Motherhood” with our kids, employees, and one another.

You  often had your children with you at the office – any tips on having children in your work space?

Suzanne: Our office at the time was fairly roomy, so that helped – things like having a kitchen and a spare office that became a nursing, play and napping room.  In our experience, after they’re about 18 months they are too agile and curious to really be happy long enough for you to get much done.

Madeleine: I would say be prepared to be flexible, and also to get help in bits and pieces throughout the day. I would take Aiden for walks in the afternoons, for example, and he would have a nap, allowing Suzanne to get in a few uninterrupted hours.  Expectations about productivity also need to be recalibrated so you don’t become frustrated or give yourself a hard time if you’re not able to do as much as you used to.

What do you do to help maintain balance in your family – work life?

Madeleine: In my case I think it’s easier because of having just one child.  That said, I am honestly not great at the work-life balance – “I feel it all”, as Feist says, and would probably benefit from some guilt-reduction therapy, because when I’m not working I feel like I should be, and ditto the reverse for family time. I find gardening to be the best solution for pretty much anything!

Suzanne: I think that there never is a perfect balance, instead the scale tips back and forth on a regular basis. I was very deliberate about tipping the scale in the family side when the kids were babies.  Now that they are older and we have help at home, it’s tipping back the other way.  At the end of the day though, coming home to a happy family is the best way to gauge how you are doing in the family/work balancing act.

A supportive partner is a must, and taking care of that relationship is vital, because that is the first place where things can start to fall apart or snowball into bigger problems.  It sounds cliché, but regular and meaningful date nights, as well as dates for yourself (I like to go running in the forest and get massages… not at the same time of course!) go a long way to keeping the magic and staying sane!

Visit www.mamarenew.ca for a link to the 3 day Lunapads sale & new website launch!

You know that feeling when a friend asks you a really good question? One of those questions that reframes something in a new way you hadn’t considered before, gently guiding you to a new place of knowing just through the asking.

It should be no surprise then, that one of my favourite things about Mama Renew is the moments when you see the shift happen, the opening that wasn’t there before, the sudden understanding of something that had not been questioned.

Why Mama Renew?

Why not just get together with a group of girlfriends and talk?

That’s a good question. Here’s my answer:

At Renewal: A Retreat for Mothers you’ll be asked some really good questions. Each of you will share from your experience and perspective and your words will add to our collective understanding. As your facilitator my role is to listen under your words for the unspoken beliefs and assumptions, to seek the common threads that have not yet been seen.

There is a real gift in expert facilitation, helping you to weave your words into a deeper understanding of your experience. I look forward to offering each of you a unique blend of discussion, journaling, reflection and creativity to support you in growing as a woman and mother.

See you there?   Space is limited!

For mothers of todders, tweens, teens & empty nesters

Visit the Mama Renew and Hollyhock websites to Learn More

or call Sarah at 604.254.1100

and Hollyhock at 1-800-933-6339 x232

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