by Sarah Juliusson of www.MamaRenew.ca – Find Mama Renew on Facebook & Twitter
It’s the day after the retreat and Life is back to normal. My husband has a cold. The kids are back from school. The garden needs a good weeding. It is always a striking contrast to step back into our normal reality after such a step away.
We found ourselves musing on the nature of the retreat yesterday – why was it so special? Time away, of course, is always a treat. The open dialogue & heartfelt exchange that began from our very first evening together was extraordinary. The nature that surrounded us surely helped us feel held & nurtured.
What really made the difference, however, were the unexpected small things:
1. Permission to make a mess. With a basket of fabric, threads & beads available 24 hours a day we reveled in the opportunity to begin a project and leave it out without worrying about the mess or our children playing with the needles.
2. A sense of completion. We finished our tea, our baths, our walks, our creative projects, our meals…no interruptions & all the space we needed.
3. No Responsibility. Hollyhock staff picked us up at the ferry, carried our luggage to our rooms, fed us nourishing and scrumptious meals, washed all the dishes, and made us feel like queens for 4 days. All we had to do was enjoy.
4. Oysters on the Beach. On Saturday night we enjoyed the Hollyhock tradition of grilled & raw oysters on the beach. The first time for a few of us, and well worth the bravery. They were amazing, especially with their secret recipe topping which I would Love a recipe for.
5. The Tea Nook. So simple, and yet it offered us a beautiful sense of being held. Water always hot. A bowl of chamomile flowers & mint leaves to float in our cups. An array of beautiful teas to choose from.
I’m going to Mexico with my mom this week. In the past year we have celebrated our 40th and 70th birthdays, and she wisely proposed that we honour this momentous year with a shared adventure.
Have you ever managed to arrange for a glorious outing with dear mama friends and found yourselves just talking about your kids? It seems that when we’re together with other parents we can’t help ourselves. I remember coming home from my first baby playgroup and feeling thrilled to have spent 2 hours talking about cloth diapers.
“When did you stop dancing? When did you stop singing? 
Those of you who say Yes will be surrounded by stunning 
So simple, and yet so complex… Another good friend once shared this wisdom: “The baby comes out, and the guilt goes in.” Based on our observations from supporting thousands of new mothers, we have to agree. Our capacity for guilt is astounding.
© 2009 Mothering Magazine