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Peggy O'Mara

A Quiet Place

Free-Range Play

May 22nd, 2012

 

 

Someone once told me that mammals learn through play. When children run and play they are also learning. They are using their creativity, developing their self-confidence, building resiliency, increasing physical prowess; learning how to work in groups, to share, negotiate, and resolve conflicts; and honing self-advocacy skills. Play is the work of children and it is through un-structured, self-directed play that children learn to make decisions, and to identify their interests and passions.

Play comes natural to children. Sometimes, if children have been watching a lot of television or have known mostly structured play, they will imitate TV and other’s directions in their play. As they have more time for themselves, they will learn to play in an original way. When children complain of being bored, this state is the very cauldron of creativity. Don’t rescue them from their boredom.  Allow them this discontent. Boredom makes creativity inevitable.

PLAYFULNESS

It’s almost summer now and those warm endless days and nights are near. Here are some ideas to encourage playfulness:

Go bike riding.

Take a walk at night when the moon is full.

Gaze at the stars.

Go on a bug safari.

Make some large cardboard appliance boxes available.

Give your children a video camera to use.

Make a detailed map of your yard, your house, your neighborhood.

Have a scavenger hunt.

Put on a treasure hunt.

Invite the neighborhood over for a circus.

Make boats from wood scraps and corks with paper or fabric sails and sail them down a creek or in the gutters.

Decorate each other’s faces with face paints.

Fill a toy box with old clothes, skarves, jewelry, hats, and shoes.

Make an outdoor obstacle course or par course.

Fill walnut shell halves with candle wax and a tiny wick. Light them and place them around the garden or on a pond at night.

OLD TIME OUTDOOR GAMES

When I was a child we played lots of outdoor games like jump rope, hop scotch, jacks, Hide and Seek, Kick Ball, Red Rover. Mother May I and Red Light/Green Light. These last two are especially fun at dusk. In Mother May I, one player is chosen as Mother. The other players stand a fair distance from her. She calls each in turn by name and instructs them to take a number of baby steps, giant steps or scissors steps. The player must remember to say, “Mother May I” before each move or go back to the beginning. The first player to Mother wins.

In Red Light/Green Light, one person directs the rest of the team to either move or not move and the first to the finish wins. If you’re moving when the light turns red, you have to go back to the beginning.

FREE-RANGE PLAY

Sometimes we think we have to play with our children in order for them to play. This is not true. We may want to play with them sometimes, spontaneously, but most often play is of their own invention and is their own business. They model our busyness with their own. What they need is free time.

This is different from days at home when there are things scheduled to do, like chores. What children need is totally unstructured time to invent and reinvent themselves. Adults need that too. How can we give our children the opportunity for more free time in which to play?

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Return of the Serpents

March 19th, 2012

 

 

These two snakes were mating on the wood pile in the sunroom all afternoon yesterday. At first I thought it was one snake, but it’s two intertwined. My photo doesn’t capture their sublime mating; they remained intertwined, moving just slightly, for hours. Last year, I saw two snakes outside mating in the shape of an infinity symbol. Seeing them is a harbinger of spring.

The snake, or serpent, is a symbol of wisdom and knowledge in traditional societies. Snakes are associated with the life giving properties of the Great Goddess; in India snakes are worshipped as gods and milk is poured over them. The Gorgons of Greek myth, Medusa for one, were snake-women, whose gaze turned flesh to stone. Quetzalcoatl, the Plumed Serpent, was the Aztec spirit of intelilgence.

Even today, we associate the snake with healing by using the Caduceus to symbolize medicine and the Bowl of Hygieia to symbolize pharmacology.

Years ago I moved out of a house because of the snakes. Now I know that there is no more effective pest control than snakes. And, while I sometimes still jump when I see them, I welcome them now. I welcome their wildness.

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Watching the Birds

November 16th, 2011

I picked up the book The Big Year when I went to buy bird food recently and it’s rekindled my love of bird watching. The book is about a year-long competition to see the most birds in North America and has been made into a movie with Steve Martin, Owen Wilson, and Jack Black.

When my oldest daughter was ten we would sit on my bed watching the birds at the bird feeders on the porch off my bedroom. We learned to identify our local mountain birds together and later incorporated some aspects of an ornithology course from Cornell University into her homeschooling studies. Now, years later, we both still love watching birds and plan on making a trip after Thanksgiving to Bosque del Apache, a National Wildlife Refuge.

One February I participated in the Great Backyard Bird Count sponsored by The Cornell Lab of Ornithology, which counts specific species of birds. This year, I’m thinking of participating in the Christmas Bird Count sponsored by the Audubon Society, which goes from December 14, 2011 to January 5, 2012.

The Audubon Christmas Bird Count began in 1900 as an alternative to “side hunts,” contests to shoot the most birds on Christmas day. Frank M. Chapman suggested that we count birds rather than kill them and today the Christmas Bird Count helps amateur and professional bird lovers study the long-term health and status of bird populations across North America.

If you are already providing food, water and habitat for the birds in your area or want to, look into the Wildlife Habitat Certification offered by the National Wildlife Federation.

After decades of feeding the birds and leaving out fresh water for them, I now see new generations of birds growing up already accustomed to the bird feeders. Watching them helps me to keep in touch with the wild and learning the names we give them helps me to feel part of it. I’d love to hear about your experiences sharing bird watching with your children.

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    Mothering's long-time editor and publisher, Peggy O'Mara, shares observations and insights about overcoming parenting obstacles, appreciating unacknowledged epiphanies, and taking care of yourself. Also, great food ideas and recipes, as well as beautiful home and garden tips.

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