About five seconds after we conceived this time, I looked like I was five months along, but we felt shy about telling people we were pregnant until I was almost at the end of my fourth month.
“Was it a surprise?” The principal at my daughter’s school asked.
“Were you planning it?” another mom wanted to know.
“Were you so shocked?!” said a third parent. “Wasn’t it an accident?!”
“My husband and I were joking that you must be turning into Mormons,” another friend said.
“We were wondering if you are becoming religious,” was yet another comment.
I was a little nervous about telling people we were expecting but I didn’t anticipate these reactions. People can get very weird when you’re having a fourth child (or even a third… or a second).
I wrote my friend Holly, who has four children, and told her my feelings were hurt that everyone I knew seemed so surprised and judgmental that we—gulp—actually were wanting and trying for another baby.
Holly’s husband is a stand-up comedian. Her firstborn is in college and she has a baby in diapers. Holly always knows what to do.
“Next time someone says, ‘was this pregnancy planned?!’ tell them, ‘goodness no. I have no idea how it happened! Can you explain it to me?’” Holly suggested.
If you’re having a similar experience telling people you are pregnant, try it. It works every time.
© 2009 Mothering Magazine