a la mama

Hey, I’m in the thick of hideous clouds of juniper pollen here in Santa Fe. Cherilyn Swenson of Spabox dropped by and gave me some sweet relief in the form of Clear My Head 2 Go Roll On Inhalation. It helps. Benadryl did nothing, nor did Claritin (although they work for some). As I mentioned, doing the neti pot helped last night, but it’s not something I want to do in the work bathroom sink area. I roll the inhalation it over my sinuses, as the skin under my nose is currently too sensitive to go near.

We had a great time talking about some other brands she’s repping, including Nectar Essences and Buddha Nose. (Me, I have corned beef nose at the moment). We plan on doing some super-delish blog giveaways really soon, so stay tuned! Christine, who won the Lisa Kogan book a few days ago, said “I’ve never won anything before in my life!” so there’s hope for all y’all.

The other thing that helps: watching Mad Men episodes back to back. What a great distraction.

Take one bedraggled mom with a puffed allergy face. Initiate neti pot procedure. Then, apply Uriel Pharmacy’s Lemon Quince Allergy spray to nostrils, Cinnabar Dandelion cold relief pellets, and Lavender Quartz ear oil for the pesky itchy eardrum thing.

I do feel better.

Somewhere along the line, I didn’t end up raising my children in France. It was one of my single gal dreams. Didn’t quite work out, although the kids’ dad is half-French and he’s finally getting around to getting their EU citizenship squared away.

One of the ways that I make peace with raising them in Santa Fe, NM is selecting an item of clothing from Olive Juice Kids every now and then. Another way I make peace with it is consuming very large amounts of red and green chile (you cannot get that in France, and it would be very awkward to ask. I once tried to ask for Monistat 7 in high school French, avec the help of…pantomiming…in a Pharmacie in Paris, and it not only still makes me shudder with embarrassment, the clerk had no idea what I was talking about and I left empty-handed.)

Olive Juice has such great sales, although I don’t believe any are going on right now. When they do, you can really scoop up comfortable, darling items for girls and boys that don’t go near screen prints of dinosaurs, princesses, pop stars, tools, or dump trucks.

And the winner of my ultimate favorite Easter Dress contest is: the Annabelle Sweater Dress. It doesn’t come with a giant smock to guard the lovely thing from getting stained by chocolate, but that’s a worry for another day.

Mallory! I’ll be emailing you, Miss Winner.

Thank you to every single person who shared a few of their favorite springtime things.

Lisa Kogan is probably most well-known for writing a monthly column on her “perfectly imperfect life” (single motherhood, writing, friendships and family) for O Magazine. I have her new book in front of me, a copy provided by Harper Collins as a reader giveaway.

So, leave a comment telling us who your favorite mama author is and why, and I will enter your name in a drawing and pick the lucky winner on Monday, March 22.

Taking life just as it is may sound easy. Doing it? Now that’s hard, but also necessary and ultimately liberating. There are gifts embedded in the accidents of fate that give existence its shape, meaning and richness – as the old adage goes, make your mess your message. In my case, the mess was secondary infertility. The message became my ability to help others heal through Yoga, mindfulness and acceptance. Mothering and nurturing myself was part of my journey.

I was a 26-year-old actress making it happen in Los Angeles. Motherhood? Uh, no. Not just yet. My eyes were fixed on my career.

A few years later, I was married and a veteran step-mom, now yearning for a child of my own. I went off birth control during my stepdaughter’s high school years, confident I’d get pregnant. I did. Just not on my schedule. It took a lot longer than I reckoned.

Still, motherhood-by-marriage and the birth of my son lulled me into assuming another child would come easy.

When I decided it was time, I hit a brick wall. Between my fast-forward film and TV career, my family, and my yoga teaching, I was living pedal-to-the-metal, overworked and over-stressed. I had lost a lot of weight for a film role and stopped ovulating. I was out of balance. I went to a reproductive endocrinologist, and he ran some tests. He told me I was suffering from “secondary infertility.” I wanted to take more aggressive measures to get pregnant as my clock was ticking. I wanted to try IUI or IVF.

My husband felt differently. He had two children and didn’t need more, if we had them naturally he was fine, but he didn’t want to push. Because of his resistance, I had been researching how to balance my hormones with yoga. It was on me to heal my own body and I plunged headlong into a self-prescribed treatment of acupuncture and yoga postures to balance my hormone cycle and reduce my own stress. I developed a proprietary approach to yoga for fertility for myself. I stayed with it, and I started to calm down in my mind and my body.

Out of my mess came my message. I created Strong Yoga4Fertility and worked with women just like me. I taught them how to breathe. To open their bodies and to receive life as it comes because that’s what I had to do. Women who couldn’t get pregnant were suddenly getting pregnant. It turns out that yoga combined with their medical protocols was potent.
Perhaps even more significantly, irrespective of the outcome, the women working with me found how much they’d been suffering from fear and shame around fertility issues. By learning to connect to themselves and others on the fertility journey, they learned that they weren’t alone, and that everyone’s path is different.

In my parallel journey, my husband and I produced both a “Yoga for Fertility” and “Yoga for Partners” DVD. After we packaged them, I got pregnant. My pregnancy lasted the first trimester. There was no heartbeat. I had to have a D&C and I was devastated. However, through time, I realized that the second child we were supposed to have was my birthing this important work – helping women through fertility issues. It was meant to be this way.

With the practice of yoga comes transformation. I’m blown away by how much women evolve as they build a deep and loving connection to themselves through this work. I also teach them about nutrition, greening their homes, and removing toxins from their environment. They learn to integrate their thoughts, feelings, bodies and energy. They become more conscious parents through this work.

I learned the first step toward being a mother was to nurture myself, honor my feelings and learn self-care. How can we possibly honor a child when we aren’t honoring ourselves?

Being a mother is the biggest gift I’ve ever been given. I love my son. He teaches me every day how to be a consistent and caring human being. I’ve also learned that being a mother is to breathe in whatever life offers. The foundation of yoga is the breath. The challenge for women is to learn to breathe and receive.

Brenda Strong offers 3 DVDs; Strong Yoga4Fertility, Partners and Pregnancy and is the creator of the Fertility Ball and the Strong Fertility Ball Yoga Method. She also trains yoga teachers her Strong Yoga4Fertiity through ongoing education at Yoga Works. For more info visit: www.yoga4women.com or www.yoga4fertiity.com